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unlicensedinky-blog · 5 years

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owo!! first post!! this was a submission to a writing contest on instagram that i spent an actual month on,,,,,, but i'm goddamn proud of it so im yeeting it into the void. aight lets get this bread

-Icarus

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adrenaline

you've encountered many people in your life, but never have you met anyone like her ever. you guess opposites attract, because you two are as different as can be.

she is the epitome of energy, always raring to go out and do something, always looking for a thrill. she flits from one interest to another so quickly it makes you dizzy, constantly on the search for a new rush.

compared to her, you are one leaf out of many fallen during autumn, a single drop of rain in a thunderstorm. small, quiet, unnoticed, boring.

so when she starts taking an interest in you, you don't exactly warm to the idea. the first time you say her name, it feels like a curse on your tongue, heavy and suffocating.

you've seen her leave people behind, and you've seen the people she leaves behind. it's not that you search them out on purpose. you just notice them, like in class or in the library.

her presence still lingers over them, even if its been ages since she left them.they all get over the abandonment sooner or later, but the hole where she used to be never seems to close up.

too many people have left their scars on you already, and you're not about to get one more.

she either doesn't notice your reluctance or ignores it, choosing instead to drag you along on her newest conquests. it always starts with a knock on your window in the middle of the night, and it always ends with her reckless grin in your mind as she walks you home.

she takes you to an abandoned funfair, the rides rusted and the gate nearly falling apart. you watch her fiddle around with the roller-coasters controls, and try not to notice how her eyes light up when somehow, with whatever chaotic force that accompanies her, she manages to get it functioning.

taking your hand, she pulls you into the cart and hits the button. the cart doesnt move for a minute, but just as you move to get off it jerks forward with a rusty groan.

the cart shoots off onto the tracks, spinning and racing through loops, the rusty wheels creaking at every turn. and by a miracle or whatever chaotic force that accompanies her again, you are lucky to make it back to ground safely.

she laughs the entire time you two are on that death trap, and she's still laughing when you two get off. you roll your eyes, ignoring the way her laugh makes you feel a bit lighter.

maybe it's that that distracts you, because you only realise it when she drops you off at your house and leaves for her own.

it's that she never let go of your hand for the entire night.

you watch her back slowly disappear into the dark, your hand twitching slightly. you sneak through the front door and up to your room, falling onto your bed.

you fall asleep to the lingering warmth of her hand in yours and the sound of her laughter.

she's outside your class when school ends. she barely gives you enough time to pack yout things before she is once again dragging you off on another 'adventure', as she calls them.

she's there everyday. it almost becomes a routine, and the irony of it doesn't escape you. a wild spirit following a routine. you would think that she was doing it for you, but you're not stupid.

that still doesn't stop the warmth in your chest from spreading.

and she only upset the 'routine' once.

you remember it was particularly cloudy that day, like the sky was miserable. the school was too. everything felt off. it felt sadder.

you had a wild theory, but you reasoned that it was highly impossible. she was, quite literally, only human, and not some kind of god. and besides, she was fine.

a few people screamed as a loud crack sounded through the sky, closely followed by roaring thunder, then a heavy onslaught of rain.

you winced, slouching in your seat.

probably.

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you were wrong.

class ends, and she's not at the door. you pack your things as slow as you can, giving her time to magically appear like she always does.

she doesn't show up.

you catch yourself before you start to worry. wasn't this what you wanted in the first place? for her to leave you alone? you don't have to go along with whatever scheme she's planning, because she's not even there. you're free.

you can't even convince yourself of that for one minute before you start running.

you dash out of the school, your backpack thumping against your back. the rain feels like daggers on you, it's that heavy, but you ignore it. finding her is the priority, and if you get sick, then so be it.

you wrack your brain, trying to think of places she could be. you must look silly standing out in the rain alone, but you can barely bring yourself to care. which is new to you.

you don't get time to dwell on it, and maybe that's a good thing.

you hear your name said by that oh so familiar voice, and you spin around so fast you nearly fall over.

but there she is, soaked to the bone, her hair plastered to her face, standing in front of you. she looks confused, as if wondering why you would even be searching for her.

she has never looked more beautiful.

it doesn't register in your mind that you're moving, but you are. you cup her face in your hands, brushing your thumbs over the streaks of water on her face. her eyes are red.

she leans forward, and you find yourself doing the same, and then you're kissing her.

it feels like the world stops, just for that moment, suspended in time, where only you and her exist. you feel her hands on the back of your neck, you feel her lips on yours, you feel her.

you feel her, and it is beautiful.

she pulls away and rests her forehead on yours. there's a smile that you haven't seen before on her face, and you're fairly certain there's a similar smile on your face.

it's a smile filled with joy, and perhaps a little bit of something else.

you whisper her name, and it tastes like honey on your lips. you don't ask her why the water on her face tasted of salt.

the days after that are more pleasant. she still takes you on 'adventures', but you actually find yourself enjoying them this time. you let yourself bask in the lightness of her laughter, the warmth of her hand.

she breaks down your walls, and you let her. you bare your heart to her, scars and all, and she accepts it with no hesistation and the same smile she had.

everything is wonderful, and it feels as if the whole world belongs to the both of you.

and then she leaves.

she stops coming to your class when school ends. she stops knocking on your window in the middle of the night.

she's gone from your life as easily as she entered it.

you don't blame her. you know it's not in her nature to be tied down to one person. you take back what you said about her being the epitome of energy.

she is the manifestation of adrenaline, giving you the rush of adventure and spirit, and then leaving as quickly as she came.

you see her pulling on someone else's hand, and you taste blood in your mouth. you close your eyes against the sight and press back the tears that threaten to fall.

the world still stops.

just not for you.

#writers #writing #spilled ink #spilled thoughts #spilled words #spilled writing #writeblr #owo #icarus writes

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