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#and then i go actually i guess if i'm going to take a rbeak i'll do some drawing
finniestoncrane
·
1 year
Text
running around in a circle tugging at my hair and holding back tears: too many things too many things too many things too many things too many thi
#if i could just. focus. for more than 30 seconds at a time
#i write one sentence of a fic and then go and check my work emails
#but while i'm there i'm like oh wonder if tumblr looks different on the remote desktop internet
#it doesn't but i get distracted anyway until i realise and close it down
#and then go back to my own desktop to look at tumblr
#where i promptly get distracted for minimum ten minutes before i catch sight of the messages i haven't responded to yet
#and i type a couple words out and then think oh shit i have messages on discord
#so i go there
#and get distracted by scrolling through not even new messages
#maybe type a few words of a message before i mark it as unread because i'm like
#oh i gotta finished writing the next chapter of my thing
#and then i'm like hmmm but tempting commission work
#and then i go actually i guess if i'm going to take a rbeak i'll do some drawing
#so i grab my ipad which is still open on creepshow which i was watching last night
#and so i start watching it but i can't focus because there's something else going on
#and i realise i'm already watching the simpsons on my phone which explains why i have five different simpsons quotes on repeat in my head
#and then i realise that there's a song playing on spotify on my laptop
#and amidst those three noises i am also entertaining myself with in my head vocal stims and out loud vocal stims
#and my anxiety is like hey... wanna worry about something
#AND I JUST WANT TO FOCUS LIKE ONE THING AT A FUCKIN TIME ONE FUCKIN THING
#finnie shouts into the void
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