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kindagayfish · 1 year

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Hello friend!

Im new to the trigun family after watching Stampede and recently ive been on a Knives kick and i dont see much content about him x reader.

So i was wondering if we could get some headcanons about what would make Knives feel “those gross human feelings” (love, the need to protect,need for affection) for the reader, and how he would tell them or show them?

I just need some knives fluff! Boy needs and hug! If you dont wanna write that, thats totally fine!! Thank you!!

A/N: Knives is SUCH an interesting character and im literally so feral for him. This is very much stream-of-conscious writing and not proofread. It also turned out so much longer than I expected! I legit got so carried away so I hope you enjoy it!!

Also I feel like my thoughts/headcanons for Knives will always be constantly evolving because he's just such a complex character??? And I love it???

Contains: Hints of nsfw thoughts if you squint??, fluff I guess??, can knives even do fluff???, the slowest of slowburns for this man

So we know Knives does know what love feels like…sorta. He loves Vash, and wants to see a future where they can both live their lives without the fear of being used for what they are. However, that means killing every human left on the planet. So it’s a twisted kind of love…but he still cares in his own way.

I don’t think Knives would notice you right away. It won’t be some love-at-first-sight, omg this human was so nice to me thing. It will take A LOT of time. He has completely blocked himself off from anyone because of fear, and fear is an intense driving force.

Perhaps you’re involved in his grand scheme somehow; A scientist in a lab who has taken a special interest in the Plants. At first, you’re focused on finding a more sustainable way for them to be used…but then after witnessing one open itself up, showing a high level of intelligence, you change your studies to find a way for them to live beyond the confines of the glass tanks.

You’re aware of Knives. Aware that he’s what they call an Independent. And you take notes on him, studying any file that isn’t restricted from the ships that once roamed the universe.

Knives becomes aware of you rather quickly. It's hard to ignore the way your eyes follow his every move, jotting down your observations quickly into a notebook that never seems to leave your hands. At first he finds it irritating, having this human stalk him like a shadow. However, it was only when you caught him on a particularly bad day that he finally spoke to you.

"Get OUT." His voice was ice, sending a sharp tendral into your notebook, tearing it from your hands. You let out a pained yelp, though none of the blades touched had you, and ran out of the room.

After he's calmed down, curiosity gets the better of him, and Knives spends the rest of the evening reading through your notes.

The next day it's him that seeks you out. Knives finds you in a lab, placing your in-tact notebook on the table in front of you before stating that some of your observations were incorrect, which causes you to flush with embarrassment. He leaves immediately after, and upon inspecting your notebook, you find that he had crossed out some of your own notes, replacing it with the "correct" information.

Knives begins to tolerate your company. You're not as insufferable as the other humans, and he finds himself quite intrigued by how brave you've gotten around him ever since that day. But he continues to keep himself at a distance….for now.

So anyways as your "relationship" with Knives progresses:

Knives shows his love through acts of service and quality time. He allows you into his space; allows himself to lower his guard and try to understand these strange feelings he gets when around you. Although, again, this takes time.

He'll start to show interest in whatever experiments you're running, quietly observing from a respectable distance. It might even start to feel like you’re the one being studied from how intense his silent stare is (he is 100% memorizing everything about you).

The more time spent with you, the more possessive he becomes of this time...and just you in general.

Knives knows that you have to talk to others in order to do your job, but that doesn't mean he won't glare at them until they walk away. He prides himself on how his presence alone can clear a room so it can just be the two of you.

If you forget to eat, time getting away from you, Knives might sigh and fetch you something. Setting it down directly in front of you and making comments under his breath about how "humans are pathetic" and how you "can't even take care of yourself". You're like a pet, he tells himself...rationalizing why he would go out of his way to make sure you stay healthy.

Physical touch comes much later

Sometimes you'll feel him lean in from behind, gazing over your shoulder to gain a better view of what you're working on. Heat radiates off of his body, but he never brings himself to touch you. Knives finds it amusing at how flustered you get when he does this and likes to test your boundaries as well as his own. He’ll catch himself too often wondering how soft your skin would feel under his fingertips. It’s a disgusting thought, really. (he is so touch starved but will NOT allow himself to indulge in this innocent fantasy because he’s stubborn and has the biggest god complex)

But it eventually happens one evening when you hand him your notebook. All of his senses are ignited, the place where your fingers brushed against his hand burns throughout the night. Knives can't bring himself to admit he likes this feeling, at least not out loud.

Oh but does he crave it.

It's a thrill, an adrenaline rush, and strangely even more fulfilling than the feeling he gets when he takes a human life.

Starts as "accidental". Fingers colliding when reaching for the same thing, the back of his hand brushing against yours as you both walk, standing too close to you so that when you take a step back, you bump into his chest.

Soon he's grabbing your wrist to stop you from doing something stupid, placing a hand on the small of your back to guide you out of a room, even taking your hand in his, frowning at the fresh injury on your skin, but also burning up inside at the fact that his own hand swallows yours completely. That you're just so fragile. So human.

Knives is absolutely obsessed.

#millions knives x reader #knives millions #millions knives #millions knives headcanons #trigun stampede #trigun x reader #millions knives x you

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the-s1lly-corner · 5 months

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Hey I was just wondering if you could do a tadc x reader who dies their hair very often? like every month or so they dye it a different color and no one knows what color it'll be next

TADC cast x reader who dyes their hair a lot!

UEUEUEUUEU hope this is okay! i must admit i was a little uwuwuawua on ideas for a lot of the characters </3 grr finding new songs to play on loop to get me into writing is hard; though currently antonymph by vylet pony is doing things to my brain

CAINE:

makes a huge deal of things whenever you dye your hair simply because he thinks what you do with yourself is cool; and since its the digital world you can get away with dying your hair as often as you want! cant damage what technically isnt real! probably makes hair color suggestions and is absolutely thrilled when you actually follow through within the coming days. prepare to have some weird combos, though... probably changes the color of his suit to match your hair... even adds stripes if your hair has stripes, or any other pattern dyed into it

POMNI:

honestly? more power to you, thats her reaction mostly. would pomni dye her own hair, or otherwise get anything to modify her appearance? probably not... but she thinks you look great with it... probably asks why you chose the current color you went with, as well as asking whenever you change. nothing like "oh WHY? why THAT color?" but like genuine non-rude curiosity... doesnt like outwardly betting or wondering what color youre going to pick outloud since she doesnt want you to think shes rude or something

RAGATHA:

has probably made multiple color variations of accessories she has made for you so you can wear anything without having the colors clash... thinks your hair is pretty, me thinks! doesnt matter what color it is, could literally be the unpleasant green-pink-brown color gradient meme and she would still find something nice to say about it... does sometimes wonder what color youre going to choose next... probably has a hush hush bet going on between her jax and zooble on what color youre going to choose next... huh what no jax didnt just get all moody because you walked in with aqua blue hair- no hes not passing something to ragatha, what are you talking about?

JAX:

as mentioned above he makes bets with some of the other circus members on what color youre going to rock next... if you ask him for any suggestions on what color you should change to next, dont expect any serious answers. even if he is being serious, jax doesnt strike me as the type to care much about colors and shades so hes probably going to drop the most basic colors. ..

"purple."

"what KIND of purple? light? dark? pastel? reddish or bluish?

"purple."

stuff like that, i think! probably fiddles with your hair, especially if you dye your tips a different color... jax fidget headcannon strikes again

KINGER:

on a bad day he might just not recognize you for a short moment... i originally said that as a joke but considering he sometimes forgets gangle is literally standing right next to him, i dont... think thats much of a joke... but after the initial confusion, i think he would really like whatever color you choose! likes playing with your hair, if you let him! he finds it soothing in its own way, and now he just has pretty colors to look at! cant explain why but i feel like he would be very good at identifying colors, so if you come in rocking some new color hes going to ask if its (insert specific shade of red that no one knows the name of. like. amaranth red.. or something..)

ZOOBLE:

honestly, they get it! i like to think that they swap out their pieces in order to fit whatever look or vibe they want for the day; aaaand i personally hc that in the real world they would dye their hair and get a bunch of piercings! though, they dont really remember much stuff from the real world, at least not clearly... but the point still stands, you guys probably get together to make a new look together! though, on days where they dont give any input on what hair color you choose next, theyre making bets with jax and ragatha... dont know why but i think zooble wins the most in the bets... shrugs

GANGLE:

oh she thinks its so pretty! has probably always loved things like that, since its a form of self expression! and she can kind of relate to that since shes an artist, albeit her medium is paper rather than her body... thinks... probably gives shy recommendations for colors if you ask her, is also bad at masking (lol) her surprise when you actually take her idea into consideration and follow through with it... makes her feel some type of way that someone cares enough about her ideas that they literally apply it to their appearance, you know?

#tadc x reader #the amazing digital circus x reader #digital circus x reader #caine x reader #pomni x reader #ragatha x reader #jax x reader #kinger x reader #zooble x reader #gangle x reader

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pacifymebby · 1 year

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peaky blinders hc for what it would be like to be dating them/married to them!! xx

So i did married to them, hope thats alright xx

Tommy

🌿 Determined to make sure things are different this time, good and true, he wanted to marry you with the gypsies. So you had your wedding in the fields at the Golds settlement.

🌿Dangerous goes without saying, naturally, however somehow its worse than you imagined. You always thought Tommy was being dramatic when he said it would get worse once you were married

🌿 But it got worse, there have been multiple attempts on your life and Tommy is more protective of you than ever

🌿 He doesn't always show it in the best or most romantic of ways, sometimes he stays late at work, hours late because hes trying to pull together a plan that will keep you safe. He doesn't tell you often enough that its you hes thinking of, its yours and his future which keeps him going.

🌿Puts a lot of pressure on himself for things to be different this time. Hes been married in the past and failed to treat people right, he won't let himself go wrong again.

🌿When things get bad and youre scared - though you try to be brave for your husband - Tommy tries to get you to talk to him and admit your fears, says its good to be scared, shows youre still innocent, shows you're still alive.

🌿That kind of talk scares you more though and so he ends up bringing you into his lap/arms, cradling you to his body and whispering promises to keep you safe, to never leave you.

🌿Tells you stories, that if things get really bad you'll get a wagon together and dissappear never to return. You'll chanhe your names, leave everything behind, just you amd him together. You know it will never happen like that but the story comforts you every time.

🌿 Doesnt involve you in the business at all, determined to keep you pure and innocent. Even if he knows deep down its impossible.

🌿Spoils you, mostly with pretty jewellery and animals. Buys you dogs, always takes you with him to buy horses.

🌿Has a horse he keeps just for the two of you and takes you riding as often as he can.

🌿 Sometimes in the summer the two of you dissappear for days on that horse, living like gypsies where no one can reach you. These are his favourite memories. Brings himself hell from the rest of the family upon your return, but its worth it every time.

🌿 Youre one of the only people who can talk any sense into him, hes always talking to you about "mutual respect" and how hes heard its the most important thing in a marriage. So whenever you argue, and if you step out of line, he'll stop you and remind you.

🌿 "What is it we have love? Remind me eh i think I've forgotten?" "respect Tommy," you sigh. "Mutual respect, that means it goes both ways... Right," he pats your cheek lightly, his cheeky smile gets under your skin "that'll be that then eh."

🌿 The longer goes by the less he feels haunted by Grace. You're a mother to his children and he talks to you all the time about having a baby with you. Whenever you have sex he tells you thats what he wants.

🌿 Still calls you his angel, still believes you were sent from heaven to heal him.

Alfie

🐻 Good, quiet, stable and steady. Alfie treasures you and isnt going to let anything happen to you. Which means you lead a remarkably quiet life for a ganstas wife.

🐻 He keeps you out of business, and for the most part, keeps himself out of business too.

🐻 He made a joke at the wedding saying that if anyone tried to joke around and ask if he was the father of the bride, he'd cut them. You know he wasn't really joking, you know he occassionally does worry hes too old for you.

🐻 "Sure you wouldn't rather be out there with handsome young men your own age?"

🐻 The plain and simple answer is no... The longer answer is still no, but followed with lots of questions. For one, why on earth would you want to be with any of those arrogant younger men who waste all their money on snow and whiskey, who dont care for their women and sleep around... Your alfie is so good to you, devoted to you, takes care of you, hes your gruff and grumpy bear. You like thats hes a little old fashioned, that he has manners, that hes your old man.

🐻 Takes baths with you, candle lit, when the rooms all steamy he makes you lie back against his chest whilst he washes you. He hums you little tunes, tells you he thinks hes gonna write an opera one day. You joke and ask who will be his muse, you or tommy shelby. And when you make jokes like that he takes your wet hair and wraps it round his fist, tugs on it gently but harsh enough to pull your head back so that youre looking up at him.

🐻 "Remember our rules right ziskeit, you don't mention the name of the devil, we dont talk about cursed men right in this here home of ours" its like hes almost superstitious about it. Doesnt want you to say Tommys name because the man is cursed and the curse catches.

🐻 When you apologise you kiss each of his finger tips.

🐻 He bakes you bread (actual bread) all the time, especially when hes stressed, the kneeding is theraputic for him. Sometimes he gets you to help him, teaches you the proper way to do it with his hands over yours.

🐻 Eventually you move to margate together, he likes it better that way, thinks you can really be safe, thinks you'll finally be away from Tommy Shelby for good. He misses his old friend but he's glad to keep the curse away from you.

🐻 Can't sleep at night without you resting your head on his chest. Likes to comb his fingers through your hair until he falls asleep.

🐻 Likes to help you dress in the mornings, brushes your hair, lets you teach him how to make it pretty, but complains his fingers are too big and clumsy, not dainty like yours. But you like it better when Aflie does your hair for you, you feel prettier knowing his hands made you up like that.

Arthur

🍂 Tumultuous to say the least. This is one traumatised man and you accepted the ups and downs of your relationship a long time ago. Your one rule is that he never suffers alone.

🍂You want to go through everything with him, you never want him to be alone snowed up and sad drunk so even when he gets himself in a terrible state, even when he begs you to leave him because he doesnt want you to see him like that, you stay with him, you hold him whilst he cries, you weather his temper knowing he will never hurt you.

🍂 He does scare you, when he breaks things it scares you, but you know he loves you, you know its not really him but his illness, you've stood and watched him destroy a room before and then said "You gonna come here now and let your wife look after you?"

🍂 You hold his head to your chest and soothe him to sleep. Kiss his hair, tell him you know hes a good man. You tell him you love him all the time.

🍂 Despite the fact youre married he still has a complex, still thinks he doesnt deserve your love still thinks hes ruining your life, is terrified of corrupting you, but you never let those thoughts linger and refuse to take him seriously when he tells you.

🍂 "Dont be daft my darling husband, you deserve all the love in the world and I'll be damned if you get it from any woman but me..."

🍂 His heart is always in the right place even if his romantic plans dont always go to plan. Sometimes he buys you flowers but forgets to give them to you until theyve already wilted. Hes tried to cook for you and nearly set the house on fire.

You find it funny and endearing however, it means all the more to you that he tries so hard for you.

🍂 The sex is so good, and maybe a little relentless, because hes determined to be an honest man now he takes his full sexual appetite out on you and its exhausting in the best way possible. When hes pissed off you like to tease him into taking his frustration out on you sexually.

🍂 Naturally being the wife of a peaky blinder is dangerous, you and arthur both know that and your being so precious to him does mean that he is sometimes a little zealous trying to protect you.

🍂Men have lost teeth for looking at you.

🍂 And men who have actually tried to harm you... You didn't witness every death so you couldn't possibly say what happens to them...

🍂 Does make you feel powerful, you like how it makes you feel like a dangerous woman. You try to keep that secret though as arthur would hate to think he'd corrupted your morals in any way other than sexually.

John

🌼 John is a good husband because hes a good lad, a decent, honest, caring lad. He always did have a little more good in him than his brothers.

🌼 He takes being your husband seriously, he wants to provide for you, protect you, wouldnt see himself as a man if he couldnt keep his wife and home happy.

🌼 Wants a big happy family with you. Finds great comfort in sitting down at the kitchen table with all the weans running around, playing games like him and his brothers used to when they were kids, seeing you his wife there too. Its comforting to have this heavenly little bit of peace, even if its a kind of peace which is pure chaos.

🌼 Hes attentive, always checking in on his flower. He wants you to always be happy.

🌼 He's also still got the heart of a boy, hes childish and silly, likes playing games with you, will chase you around the garden, through the house, sling you over his shoulder when he catches you.

🌼 Plays with the kids, is a good father as well as a good husband, but definitely is the kind of father that ropes the kids into his tricks and uses them to help wind you up.

🌼 Cuddles up to you all the time, likes to catch your hand as you walk past him and pull you into a hug. Refuses to let you go, makes you put up a fight.

🌼 Lowkey always horny, is looking for any excuse and opportunity to fuck you.

🌼 Brings gifts back for you from the city, brings you flowers. Threads them through your hair.

🌼 Always trying to steal kisses from you.

🌼 At family meetings he stands by you, with his arm around your waist and his hand holding yours. He wont let anybody talk down to you. He takes protecting you very seriously.

🌼 Would throw himself in front of you, take a bullet for you, run into a burning building for you in a heartbeat. He takes being your husband very seriously.

Bonnie

🍀 Bonnie is the sweetest husband and he takes being your husband very seriously indeed, sometimes a little too seriously, which is adorable.

🍀"I'm your husband, I've got to look after you," "Got to keep my lovely wife safe and sound haven't i..."

🍀Makes you all these promises of how your life will be when hes a world famous fighter.

🍀 Treats you like youre still courting, picks you wildflowers, takes pride in catching good meat for you. Brings you little gifts back from the city. Sometimes he steals you little gifts from the city.

🍀 A boy of tradition, couldn't see you the night before the wedding...

🍀 The wedding was in spring, it was pure and blissful, you danced the whole night with him around the fires. It was a raucous celebration by all accounts and when it came to consumating

🍀 Now he dreams of having children with you, wants to be a father to your babies so badly... And telling you that when hes burried inside you makes you both hold onto one another even tighter in your passion.

🍀 He used to be nervous to have you at his fights but now youre his good luck charm... Not that he needs any luck but still, he likes to be able to look over and see his little dove rooting for him.

🍀 You insist upon being the one to help him prepare for the fight, youre the one who wraps his hands carefully. You put your forehead to his and your noses brush when you tell him to make sure he wins. 🍀You also insist upon being the one to patch him up afterwards. He doesnt like you getting your hands dirty like that, says you shouldnt be the one cleaning him up but you always argue. "Womens hands are more delicate and careful than mens, and I'm not having any other woman back here with you..."

🍀Besides its a good way of getting him alone after the fight. You love seeing the animalistic side of him that the fights bring out in him and watching him in the ring makes you want him pretty desperately...

🍀 Especially because its the only time you can trick him into being anything but careful with you. You like how hard he fucks you when he's still burning with adrenaline.

🍀And then afterwards when youre both coming down together how gentle he is with you, how concerned he is that he might have gone too hard and hurt you.

🍀He'll hold you in his lap, still burried inside you, scatter you in kisses, especially if you happen to have bruises on your neck and shoulders from his bites.

🍀"I'm so sorry little dove, do you hurt?" "Its a good kind of hurt Bonnie, it feels good," but he'll make sure to kiss every one better multiple times whilst he tells you how precious you are.

🍀Its not that he's insecure, he isn't at all, he knows you'd never pay another man any mind whatsoever, but its the principle of things... He believes in his morals and traditions and thinks other men should too... You don't hit girls, you show women respect, you protect them... And you don't flirt with other mens wives.

🍀 So if someone isn't respectful enough of you for his liking, he'll teach them a lesson.

🍀 And when he catches other men looking at you with lust in their eyes, he makes a cheeky little display of kissing you and holding you and letting everyone know youre his.

🍀 Puts his cap on your head sometimes when youre walking. Just to let everyone know youre the wife of a peaky boy.

Isaiah

🐀No one thought they'd see Isaiah married so young, but when he found out you were carrying his child he didn't exactly settle down but he did show everyone how serious he was about you.

🐀His father did the ceremony, it was small but lavish. A family and peakys affair, with a roaring party at the Garrison afterwards.

🐀He has you give up working, won't have his wife and the mother of his child going to work when he can provide plenty enough for the three of you by himself.

🐀You worry about him a lot. Not because you dont think hes capable of looking after himself but because you know just how capable he is of getting himself into trouble.

🐀And he does get himself into trouble, especially over you, doesnt hesitate to pick a fight with anyone whose eye you catch, now that youre his wife he takes his role as your "protector" extra seriously, not only that but he views you as his property, and no one else should be laying a finger or glance at those which belong to him.

🐀You tell him all the time you wish he'd calm down a little, get into less scraps but he says "What kind of a husband would i be if i didnt defend the honor of my wife"

🐀Really likes reminding you that youre his wife... As if you could ever forget it. Tells you youre his all the time. Makes you tell him that youre his.

🐀"Who do you belong to?" when hes fucking you, "You Isaiah, you..." "And only me..."

🐀Just because youre his wife and an honest woman doesnt mean youre having pure and honest sex... Hes rough with you, fucks you hard and fast and mercilessly.

🐀Although he likes seeing you in his jacket, he sees it as a status symbol that his wife should have lots of glamourous things of her own, so you have your own coat, which he always reminds you to wear. "What kind of husband lets his wife leave the house half dressed?" you tell him hes being dramatic.

🐀But he doesnt see it that way, he thinks you deserve the whole world, all the glamour and riches you could ever wish for, he isnt going to give you and his baby anything less than just that.

🐀Is definitely a dominant husband, has lots of ideas about the way a marriage should be and he is determined to do things properly.

🐀Tells you youre the reason he takes on dangerous jobs, that everything he does with the peakys is for you, to get a better life for you and your baby.

🐀Doesnt listen when you say you dont need anything other than him, that you only need him alive and healthy and there with you. That success and wealth mean nothing if you can't have him with you.

Michael

☘️ He comes off as cold to you sometimes. He doesnt mean to but sometimes he upsets you when he gets distant, too focussed on impressing Tommy Shelby and living up to the family name.

☘️ But when he realises what hes done and how hes hurt you he softens and warms to you immediately. Doesnt apologise for the way he has been because this is Michael and he never apologises, but he does remind you why, tells you its all for you.

☘️ Youre not sure you completely believe him there, you know some of it at least is feeding his ego, he wants everything his cousin has and more, but youre happy to let him believe that you believe his lie.

☘️And he does spoil you, youre his wife and so you must have the best, be the most spoilt woman in the room, he buys you the most beautiful dresses, has them made special for you.

☘️ His favourite thing is to buy you jewelery, especially necklaces. He has you stand in front of the mirror and watch whilst he puts it around your neck and fixes the clasp.

☘️ Then he takes the rest of your clothes off one by one, until youre only wearing the necklace, and he fucks you in the mirror, "look at all these pretty things i own," hes talking about you, "my beautoful wife, isnt she good letting me dress her up and fuck her whenever i choose"

☘️ Loves the symbolism of marriage, that youre his property that he owns you and can corrupt you. Likes that youre a well behaved, good girl who does as her husband tells her.

☘️ Kind of enjoys seeing how other men lust after you, enjoys knowing that he really does have the most beautiful woman. If he catches tommy admiring you he is both smug and pleased with himself whilst also pissed off and possesive.

☘️ In other words he has crossed a line and threatened Tommy for admiring you.

☘️ He's arrogant and it gets him into trouble a lot. You spend a lot of time soothing his wounded ego and talking him down from potential fights and bad ideas

☘️ You use sex to distract him a lot, worshipping him and really showering his ego with praise.

#peaky blinders headcanon #Peaky blinders imagine #arthur shelby x reader #tommy shelby x reader #bonnie gold x reader #Isaiah jesus x ready #john shelby x reader #alfie solomons fanfic

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pouringmyheartoutforpaper · 1 year

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it’s midnight and i just. i have this stuck in my head.

steve who’s used to every little disagreement turning into a big fight so he snaps/yells at reader and when they don’t return that fight and just kind of shutdown steve panics and feels so so guilty

my love you hit me in the soft spot. i cry so hard whenever anyone even slightly yells at me.

tw: not a lot but i thought id put one to make sure everyones safe <3: bit of a disagreement, reader with vague past relationship trauma if you squint, sensitive reader, anxious reader, oblivious steve, in love steve, steve in general. if anything from above is something you cant handle right now thats perfectly okay and ill see you next time!

steve is very very very gentle. hes calm and collected and mostly rational. so arguments are extremely rare.

but today steve was tired. oh so tired. and he missed you. so much. so when you were being almost silent on the car ride home from the bi-weekly dinner with the kids, robin and eds, he was freaking out.

the waitress was very subtly flirting with him. in a way where only the girls at the table knew what was going on.

of course steve had no interest in her, for gods sake. he didnt even look at her for more than two seconds.

you werent mad at him. no, he handled it very well. he passed all the tests. you were just sad. comparing yourself to the blonde waitress. thinking about how many people want him that you dont even know about. the little voice in your head saying “why does he want you?” and looking for signs of infidelity, coming back emptyhanded as always, shamefully reminding you that hes not your past relationships.

so no you werent mad at him. you were mad at you.

but we all know hes a little bit… slow sometimes. so that doesnt even occur to him.

what if you lost interest in him? what if you think hes annoying? why are you mad at him?

his fears only heightening when you give him a small smile when he opens the front door for you, instantly heading to the kitchen to get some water, hoping itll make you feel better.

“whats your problem tonight?”

oh.

“…what?” and you stare directly down at the countertop because you can already feel yourself tearing up at his tone.

“what do you mean ‘what?’. youve been acting weird since we left.”

he really doesnt mean for it to sound so angry, if you listened a little closer you might be able to hear the desperation in his voice.

“…the waitress”

“what?”

“she was flirting with you.

“what?”

he throws his head back and puts his hands to his face in exasperation. before realizing that youre a little too quiet… and shaking?

his tone brought back memories and fear. fear that he would just find someone else since you were bothering him. and youd be left alone again, but only this time unable to pick up the pieces.

and now hes horrified because he didnt mean to sound angry, he was just frustrated and didnt even think about how sensitive his girl was to things like that.

but you were too far gone now. your ears ringing and your breath escaping you. fighting back tears with every bone in your body, and losing said fight.

and so you turned around to look at him. and your eyes betray you once more. instantly filling with tears that make steves face drop and heart fall.

“m’sorry steve” but your voice falters and breaks before the first sob racks through your body, walking as quickly as you can to his bedroom to clean yourself up.

HES FREAKING OUT SO BAD

he feels absolutely awful. poor man starts crying too, but makes himself stop for his apology, not wanting to scare you further.

following behind you and knocking on his own door.

“babydoll, can i come in?”

youre standing in front of his mirror. eyes puffy and red and shaking. you knew steve wouldnt leave. you knew he wasnt like that. but you were crying anyways, which only made you cry more out of embarrassment.

“…yeah” you call weakly, still not looking up as he opens the door.

his arms are around you instantaneously

“‘m so sorry baby i didnt mean to sound angry, i wasnt thinking. im sorry.”

“its okay, im sorry i-”

“no, you have nothing to be sorry for. you’re allowed to get sad. theres nothing wrong with it, id never judge you for that. i was just being… stupid cause i didnt get it y’know? i mean i literally am horrifyingly in love with you. im like obsessed with you… not in a weird way…. anyways! and i get jealous all the time. like everyday, even over small things. that barista the other day? coulda killed that guy. y’had me studying how to make lattes babe.”

and of course youre giggling. his polo shirt saturated with tears and pure joy.

“i love you so much.”

“i love you most. i know you dont really think id look at anyone but you, right? but if you need confirmation i will go and take back the tip we gave that lady.”

more giggles.

and that was the difference. steve embraced your sensitivity. he loved it actually. loved the way you care about things. love the way you pick up on energies before anyone else. loves everything about you. including some of the not so pretty things.

#steve harrington #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x you #steve stranger things #stranger things #steve x reader #steve x you #steve harrington fluff #steve h #dove and steve

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cowboyjen68 · 6 months

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hi jen, i just followed you and this is really random but ive seen some of your posts helping younger people and it really struck a cord and i need to just let the words fall out of me.

ive been having issues with my girlfriend she cheated on me but this situation is very complicated and we're both fucked up people but i know she still loves me and i really love her. but my anxiety and our lack of communication is really bad right now and im so worried she might not love me the same anymore

ontop of this im 18 and for the past id say 5ish years my mental health and family life has been getting worse, getting diagnosis is hard especially with mentally ill and just overall bad parents that somehow dont understand or believe. i know im deppresed and have been i have anxiety, sever paranoia maybe bpd and bipolar and autism and everything is just so much. now the one person i had is something thats making everything hurt more and i just don't know where to go, im trying to get help but its so slow in this country and i feel so lost and tired i barely eat now and when i do its ether rare or unhealthy and everything is so much i want to collapse.

i hope this isn't to much to randomly send anonymously but you just seem really kind and helpful. thank u for your reply if you do

HI and please accept my apologies for the delay on answering this. I am sorry you are going through so much. My kids are adopted from foster care and I had many kids in my home for up to 5 years who eventually went back home. That is to say I have a lot of experience with mental illness, the systems that treat them, trauma and kids who came from unstable home lives.

At the ripe old age of 18 you have plenty of time to find love and contentment but right now might not be the time. I understand there might be odd circumstances that caused your girlfriend to cheat on you. If you feel betrayed and lost trust that is a feeling that is next to impossible to overcome for people with no comorbidities let alone a teen trying to figure herself out and deal with navigating the broken mental health/care system.

It is actually quite normal for young love to change and get redefined into friendship even when the circumstance are the best. Her cheating on you might very well be a sign that your relationship is in flux and not what you thought it was. A romance that has run its course is not a failure, relationships do not have to last forever to be important and real and worth having had.

It might be scary to think of not being with her, of not having your "one" person that you can count on but I do believe you can get farther working on yourself if you put time and energy into you and not dividing it up between you and her.

There is a lot of precedent set for women to set aside their romance and intimacy in order to be just friends while one or both does some work on herself. Sometimes it is necessary to stay involved for emotional support or financial support, that is just the reality of our world. Living single can be very difficult.

Please consider letting go of the relationship in its current form and putting your energy of yourself. Letting go of the stress of trying to repair what you had with her will remove so much pressure from you and from her that you will feel much more ready to tackle your mental state.

I promise. You are not a failure, she is not "the bad guy" in this story. Take all the wonderful things you shared with her keep those with you when you want a reminder that it loving her was worth your time even if it didn't end like you planned.

Seek mental health help but starting small. A therapist can help you begin to talk through things and often she can help you find additional resources like a medical Dr, public subsidies for insurance or free clinics to assist you in getting medication and mental health support. Most counties have a social services office and those employees are a wealth of information.

#mental health #lesbian #young love #stress #health #relationships

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aropride · 8 months

Text

listened to a podcast from tumblr ceo matt mullenweg abt his plans for tumblr and such and wrote down some quotes i found Interesting . (some are not word for word bc auditory processing + memory etc but i tried to stick to what he said as much as i could)

(on being ceo of a social network) "it is as hard as being the leader of a country"

"it needs to do a good job at showing you things you want to see- so both the people you follow but maybe also exposing you to new things you don't know about yet"

"people want their own home on the web, they want it to be something reflects them, not the needs of an advertiser"

"how do we make this amazing and really give the tumblr community what they deserve, and also give the world an alternative from these closed-proprietary advertisement-driven social networks?"

"you can have custom themes, you can customize it every little bit .. what we wanna do is making it be the best of both worlds, giving you the full customization that u currently have on tumblr, that u also have on wordpress, but still provide a streamlined interface, particularly on mobile ... you kind of move in and out of that full customization"

"that's ultimately what we're about, is giving power in the hands of users"

"what people really want isnt what they say they want ... its kind of like expressed preferences vs stated preferences ... thats probably why [other social medias] dont give u total control over ur algorithm"

"i want to have a path where you can start with, call it 'just' a tumblr ... but if you want to turn that into an e-commerce store, or customize it in a different way, or build a newsletter, or a mailing list, or create a membership site- these are all things that are supported by wordpress today"

"tumblr's userbase are primarily young .. more women than men which isnt common in technology .. its a very safe place and vibrant community for lgbt+, i think its over a quarter of the userbase.. kind of a place for art and artists"

"how do we make that a path to the wordpress open source community ... excited about ..bringing a younger demographic into wordpress"

"[the amount of new users from twitter/reddit are] less than you would think in the long term"

(to reddit/twt migrants) "give us feedback! what do you miss from the old thing when you move over?"

"i'd definitely like it to be as big as twitter or instagram"

"for tumblr for example i think [AI] could make our developers a lot more productive, their coding could be checked/tested by ai, .. that'll allow us to do a lot more .. maybe our pace of development could increase."

"ai can be a huge help in assisting on moderation, if it could help flag things before people even report them, that someone could look at and review."

"the algorithm [for the feed/dashboard] is a form of ai- its really machine learning, people use the terms interchangeably- if we could make the feed a lot better, we could tweak it and really learn the things u want to see and the people u want to follow"

"it could provide some really cool tools, when u think of the generative ai stuff, whether its dall-e or midjourney. so much of what people do on tumblr is expressing art and creativity, and theres some people who are resistant to this, but im actually hearing far more artists that are like 'wow! this is another tool in my toolbox!' its not just like using it instead of doing ur work, it's helping with the first draft, or helping u come up with new ideas, or maybe accelerating part of a workflow. so i see it like a new type of paintbrush, or new colors they can use. they see it as a new way to express their creativity. to me that's also the future. .. just like any other tool, like when we moved from typewriters to word processors."

(asked if generative AI worries him) "bad actors using ai to do more bad things .. that's definitely smth that's gonna happen, that's true with any new technology. if u rob a bank before, u used to have to get away on a horse, now you can get away on a car [laugh]. so like, think of it like that. we don't say "oh, banks are gonna be robbed so much more cuz now people can drive away faster". the good guys have cars too, so the police have cars .. it becomes something that is part of society .. there's more good people than bad people"

#text

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jemmo · 11 months

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today on everything i love and that is perfect about utsukushii kare (bc i just binged rewatched both seasons), i find it so fantastic and perfect how they, not even advertently, show how hira and kiyoi grow out of their high school personas, bc that is so a thing that happens and is something i find hardly any media really navigates as well as i see it here. high school is very much a rigid place, and in it you play your part; the popular kid, the class clown, the nerd and so on, but outside of high school, after high school, when you grow up and enter the wider role, there aren’t those roles to fulfil. you have to be you, and to do that, you have to figure out who that ‘you’ is, whether thats something you’ve always known or had inside and just kept buried or hidden, or thats something you’ve yet to discover and have to find, and then go on to actually be that, and shed all of that behaviour you learned or picked up or hid behind in high school.

idk if this is a universal thing, but it is something that especially speaks to me, being more of the hira, the loner, unpopular, shy kid. that role offers a lot of safety in high school, which is weird to say bc its not a place you aspire to be nor is it particularly enjoyable, but in a way it spares you of further ridicule. if you just fill that role and don’t do anything that acts outside of it, you can get by just fine, then high school is done and you move on. thats what utsukushii kare shows so well. the way hira is treated in high school is never really that outright bullying you stereotypically think of, which i love bc thats not really what high school is actually like. really, it is more of what you see in the show. this lower level stuff that you kind of just go along with even if it is objectively mean. the name calling is not loud insults, its those pet nicknames that follow you and remind you of the things you dont like about yourself, the things you’re embarrassed about. its the established hierarchy that you are at the bottom of that signals to you everyday that you are less important than everyone else. and hira goes along with it partly bc of kiyoi but also bc its safe and, dare i say, comfortable, bc hira has not just not known different, but doesnt wish to either, which is how he settles into his dynamic with kiyoi.

on the other hand, kiyoi’s place as the popular kid is something he is more visibly uncomfortable with, at least to me, and you see it even before you learn about what his real dreams and interests are. the way he acts with the people that surround him, he is never exactly like that. his treatment of hira especially is kinder while still hiding behind that film of treating him as the group’s lacky, but when people treat hira unkindly, he steps in, and i like to think this is from a place of him just being a good person and not just a defensiveness of hira bc of however he feels. its weird bc he does want to be admired so his place shouldn’t feel so wrong, but i think its from a place of wanting to be admired for his merit, for who he is, not out of any control or fear. he wants to be level with people when it comes to reality, and praised for the things he can do well, his abilities, not just some abject superiority others think he possesses. and i cant tell you how much i love this character for this whole ‘cool guy who’s expected to be so cool and not care about anything but actually really wants to do well at stuff and has a passion for acting and dancing and performance and just wants to be loved’. like that is one of my favourite character tropes ever and utsukushii kare does it with kiyoi to absolute damn perfection, which is only added to when you think about the queerness underlying it, kiyoi acting as this stereotypical straight popular high school boy who’s too cool for everyone but really not only is he not straight and have these complicated feelings for a boy, but he also loves performance and theatre and i love that those two things aren’t separate and it makes so much sense. there is just this young queer boy who wants to be liked hiding behind this veneer of coolness and popularity and its fabulous.

so when they do get out of high school, we get to see kiyoi embrace that side of him that he always kept hidden, not just doing what he loves, but actively pursuing it, trying hard, putting in the effort and dedication and i adore that. it lends itself so well to the mantra of ‘trying your best is the coolest thing you can do’ which i wholeheartedly believe. not caring isn’t cool. caring is cool. trying your best is cool. and not only does it make kiyoi more admirable as a character, but it feels like kiyoi is a lot more comfortable and welcoming of the admiration he gets, bc now it feels deserved, and its funny that that manifests through him being humble and playing himself down bc thats the very human thing to do when you’re praised, but it also parallels the way hira downplays and degrades himself which is actually, in a twisted way, him thinking highly of himself, which we see discussed in the last ep of season 2.

bc when hira leaves high school, he still clings to that role, even though there’s no one around him maintaining it. for him to be lowly, there has to be someone around him thats above him, but there isn’t now, which is why he clings to the dynamic he has with kiyoi above him bc it carries over and maintains his safe space. and what we see in season 2 is kiyoi removing that, asking hira to not raise him up just so he can put himself down, he wants to be level. and with kiyoi trying to take away that safety, that leaves hira having to figure out what his place actually is in the world, a world he’s always removed himself from. that’s why his discussion with noguchi is so important, bc kiyoi has struggled to be direct and put it into words with hira, either bc he struggles to say those things or doesn’t want to be so harsh with hira, but noguchi has no issue with holding back, nor feels any need to be gentle. he tells hira flat out you are selfish and ignorant to a fault and think so highly of yourself that you think you are the only person in this world. and thats what hira needs, a real challenge, someone who sees his mindset and twists it to show all the negatives of it. its never what hira intended, but its the message he sends to others; by belittling yourself, you give other people’s words and thoughts no weight or importance, thinking you know better. by removing people from your photos, by hiding behind the camera, you are not escaping the world, you are saying the world is only for you. there is only one plane to exist on, and by trying to be there alone, you deny everyone else of their existence. the option is not to not participate, its to participate alone. and what i’d hope continues in the story (idk what the movie is about at all) is a journey for hira to find how he can be involved at the same level as everyone else, to step out of the safety of self inflicted isolation and join in, feel comfortable finally taking up space and find who he is outside of high school.

#utsukushii kare #my beautiful man #i havent ranted in a while but i was rewatching so i could get a better idea of how to do my utsukare x t8s comparision #and i ended up making no notes and just having a lot of feelings #this show is literally one of the most perfect things to me and i will never get tired of talking about it #also @that one anon look I’m back on my ustukare shit I AM THE UTSUKARE GUY #anyway enough emo talk back to playing Zelda

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plasmasimagination · 4 months

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Hii

I'm very new in this plataform and the english is not my first language, so i'm very nervous. 😓

I saw your account for casuality and your open requests (if are still open) so, I'm here!

I can ask for a HSR and genshin matchup?

PD: I like your writing, I think it's cute and congratulations for yours almost 400 followers✌

She/Her

I'm pan, so I'm fine with anyone you think.💕

I'm ENFP and I'm pretty sure a 8w9.

I'm a bit like the tipycal sunshine character, optimish, always happy, extroverted, distracted... But I still a mature and wise person who sometime are very weird and feel like a strange, like so young and so old in the same time. (Ancient dreams from Marina is literally my song 😭)

I don't have a good relation with my family and I speake about them and my past never (That make me feel cringe) so, I considere myself like a bit mistery and reserved person for that and a others little things.

i love with all my soul the animals, the fantasie and sci-fi, whatever misterious-type things, philosophy and the classic fairy tales, I wanna be a writer and I have planned study philosophy.

I have a little problem with the authority for that I'm most a leader over a follower but if athe person is more capable and I respect that person i can follow the orden, and I'm very passionated when I have to defend my ideologys or when I saw a injustice, the discussions in my classroom are very interesant😅

My senses of self-preservation is almost non-existent, you know that character who always die for someone else? I'm them, I think this is the reason cause I'm a Griffyndor.

I'm very attached to my own moral, but no to the rules in general, so if I must be a alignment I would be a chaotic good.

I hate be alone, but I still fell very nervous in big crowds specialy if are very noisy, and places with no visible exits.

I can cry for whatever, I'm very kind, compassionate and affectionate all the time, i love help people in whatever, but i can be a little cruel with bad people.

I think that is all i can say about me, sorryyy id this is too long😭 i didn't know very well what write.

If you do this, so thaks to you, don't forget take care od you and a good rest.💕

HEY SWEETIE, THANK YOU FOR REQUESTING AND DONT WORRY YOU DID GREAT, and please, no need to be nervous you're way too sweet!

Anyways onto your request....

BLADE

Sunshine x grumpy

Fight me over this

It doesn't matter how you end up together, but what matters is that you are together and that's all thats important

He was very cautious of you in the beginning but later grew fond of you

He's okay with your want to be leading, he doesn't mind it at all actually, he appreciates it, he's more of a follower type of person that just does what told to

I think he would be a lot more laid back and sweeter around you, he wouldn't always be frowning or emotionless, occasionally smiling and generally enjoying your presence, it somewhat heals him in his eternal suffering

He will try to stop you from always putting others Infront of you, and will force you to take more care and be selfish from time to time

Kindness and compassion...you're gonna need that with him

You're like his safe place, he can trust you and actually tells you about him and his past.

Generally I think you guys would be very cute and that blade would appreciate a cute sunshine like you

SCARAMOUCHE

Rare matchup I do

But I also think that scara could use some sweetness in his life

No matter how much he denies it he absolutely loves you and your personality

He would burn the entire world down just to make you happy

At first he was very closed off and distant from you but got comfortable sooner or later and now he's all yours

Tho there might be a few discussions about who's gonna plan certain missions and who generally takes lead in the relationship (it's always gonna end up being you) but otherwise you guys are a great match

Do reassure him a bit and make sure he's doing fine because that boy needs it

#genshin fluff #honkai star rail #hsr x reader #honkai star rail x reader #genshin imagines #genshin impact imagines #genshin impact scenarios #genshin impact x reader #genshin headcanons #honkai x reader #scara x you #scara x reader #blade x reader

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rui-drawsbox · 3 days

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Okay obligatory DnD person as per the Dungon Meshi post(dnd/fantasy au + our life is amazing and I love it) but also I just wanted to say that there is a subclass of elves in dnd called aquatic elves that are kind of a happy mix between a mermaid and a, well, normal elf. I stick more towards spooky rather than nautical campaigns myself, so I’m not too familiar, but if I remember correctly they’re amphibious but with two legs rather than full mermaid.

Also obviously please ignore if you have different ideas but based off of what people have written about battle roles I could absolutely see some subclasses for the four!

Derek I could absolutely see as a Paladin(subclass possibly being oath of devotion or glory) basically the more defensive tank guys bound by an oath they make to themselves or someone important to them, which gives them a little spellcasting as well as actual auras that buff their allies later on.

Baxter I could see being a Bard (College of Swords), or what I kind of think of as a sort of battledancer. It would be a little less of a full spellcaster, but you can do special flourishes when fighting with a rapier which I always imagine as pseudo-dancing, plus he’d still get all the flashy bard spells. And to top it off, Bards actually use their charm(charisma stat) to cast spells which just screams Baxter to me.

Cove is a little harder but if you were going with him having a fish/animal companion while still being a melee fighter a Ranger(Beastmaster or Swarmkeeper) would be a good fit IMO, obviously with the Cove Creater he’s harder to pin than Baxter or Derek, but Ranger is pretty flexible. You basically get to choose a companion that’s from the land, air, or sea; and they can help you out in battle and follow you around, or as Swarmkeeper he could have his swarm be a school of fish.

Ruri is obviously a bit harder because you know your OC best, but if you really wanted to lean into more into the familiar/animal buddy route. Druid(circle of the shepherd) is always a fun choice! It’s kind of like the more spellcaster version of rangers’ Swarmkeeper where you can summon a lot of critters while still having some super strong elemental spells.

But anyway! I hope this wasn’t too long, I saw some (kinda) DnD our life content and I couldn’t resist! But thank you again for the adorable art of the main boys(and your lovely OC!) in a fantasy setting!

Second ask from dnd anon:

Oh! DnD anon part two!

But basically the theoretical party composition would look like:

Derek = Tank/Damage

Cove = Weapon Damage/Companion(s)

Baxter = Spells/Weapon Damage

and Ruri = Healing/Spells.

Also one last note about Druid is while druids have a lot of elemental spells (create water, spike growth, etc.), they also have the ability to do something called wildshape, where they can shapeshift into an animal for either out of battle(wildshape into a mouse to get under the crack in a door, then returning to normal and unlocking it) or battle (at later levels imagine fighting a spellcasting bear or even dragon) but also has more silly implications like wild shaping into a songbird to sing with Baxter, or a cat or sloth to ride on Cove’s shoulder.

got these asks a few days ago but i let them marinate in my brain hope you dont mind anon KJDSAUH

anyways AQUATIC ELF THATS PERFECT i tried to stick to what i knew about dumenshi rules in that post but for my first fantasy AU ideas i was going to do Cove a half mermaid (Cliff human x mermaid Kyra or elf Kyra [shes just so pretty its insane] x mermaid Cliff) that lived in a house right on the beach lmao, im happy that actually makes sense somewhere in dnd

i tried to look at the aquatic elves wiki from the forgotten realms fandom and omg so much text in the main page

also paladin Derek canon‼‼ imagine he does his oath to his brothers right after something dangerous happens to them when they were kids (im not saying his parents should die but im not saying they shouldnt--)

and bam!! tragic backstory 10x worse than his canon that is already bad enough :DD (try to make him feel less responsable now i wanna see that)

baxter turn rn. DO YOU THINK HE WOULD PLAY VIOLIN? I WANNA SEE THAT (<-this person didnt thought about drawing him with an instrument until it was time to write her thoughts) anyway it would def be a fancy instrument, daddy and mommy wanted to keep appearances i bet

one his spells makes his sword and moves shine and when hes under the sun his enemies become fucking blind

everything about him screams I HAVE MONEY but everytime people try to rob him he just rolls a nat20 in persuasion and they end up giving him money

and omg just imagine Cove's school of fish are all his pet fishes from the game JGASDFJK

im also. not discussing roles when the most i know about dnd is bg3 and i just finished 2 playthroughs. if you say ruri is a druid she's a druid, she makes super artsy flower fields and decorates every tree she sees with organical paint or smth jkfhds

Ruri's forest has a tree that connects with the ocean and they both just hangout sometimes (as if theyre not together 60% of the time already)

DRUID RURI THAT LIKES TO BRAID COVE'S HAIR WITH LITTLE POPPIES‼‼‼

MERMAID COVE THAT LETS RURI (otter form!!) RIDE HIS BACK WHILE HE SWIMS‼‼‼‼

mermaid cove humming a song and ruri falling to the river in trance/j

anyways anon i agree with everything tbh, there's so many ways to do a fantasy AU and i adore the dnd version (id kill for a dnd group or smth in my city)

i also have another fantasy au more vanilla but not-really. basically isekai baxter LMAO mostly an excuse to make ruri and baxter being domestic but before baxter developed any real domestic skill JHASFD

#rui draw smth #our life #olba #our life: beginnings & always #baxter ward #cove holden #derek suarez #our life mc #olba mc #anyways mermaid cove will always be on the back of my brain waiting until i feel like drawing him #for baxter and cove i just say silly stupid things and when it's derek's turn i kill his parents. lovely

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