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#and tbh like a fair few of my ships it was born from em thinking teh show was gonna go down their route
purgeshubble · 3 years
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moodboard: nolan x margaux
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minijenn · 6 years
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Crystal Falls: Reaching Out
Ye ye ye ye ANGST!!! Hey tbh this is the most  can do seeing as how the next actual canon chapter of UF is mostly fun humor (with some nightmare fuel thrown in I guess) so I gotta satisfy my craving somehow. Still, can you believe it took me only three days to push this  whole thing out? I was fucking MOTIVATED HAHAHA Now if you wanna know more about the context behind this AU, you can find all that here. And with all that outta the way, let’s get rollin with the (incredibly dark fair warning) angst storm!
Crystal Falls
Reaching Out
The concept of a “normal childhood” was a completely foreign one to both of the Pines twins, just as it had been to their uncles before them and to every other human born either into the conquest-hungry legacy of planet Earth or into the rebellion that had risen up to thwart one such conquest. The twins found their roots in the latter camp, even if their actual birthplace had been on Earth as opposed to the mostly peaceful Homeworld that had become their own home after their parents’ death. “Because where else were the next seeds of justice and peace to be raised but on the very planet we all swore our lives to protect?” Ford often boldly claimed throughout the twins’ younger years. Stan would usually just offer a playful scoff at his brother’s melodrama, Dipper and Mabel chuckling in amusement before running off to go play with Steven under the Crystal Gems’ lax supervision. And for the first few years, that’s what it was like; crystalline days, star-speckled nights, rousing tales of courageous battles gone by, laughter amidst streets filled with Gems bemused by their antics, comfort, happiness, friendship, family, and most of all, peace. Peace so hard fought for, so hard won. And of course, not at all destined to last.
Because when the twins were only five years old, that peace was shattered for them both the very same moment the glass of one of the shack’s windows shattered one night when they were asleep. The very moment it did, Stan and Ford were already on high alert, rushing to grab the confused, groggy younger twins and whisk them away to safety without even explaining what they were really running from. The threat soon made itself obvious, however, when the family emerged into the night, only to be adamantly pursued by a sizable group of masked figures. By their odd, militaristic outfits, it was clear that they weren’t Gems, and later the twins would find out exactly what their uncles had known from the moment this all began: that these assailants were Earthlings, sent to destroy the very last remnants of the rebellion left on Homeworld. In other words, them. A task that, against all odds, they unquestionably succeeded in in the worst of ways.
All it took was one tiny moment, one perfectly aimed shot at Stan’s exposed back for him to go crashing down, momentarily paralyzed by the blast as Dipper fell out of his arms. Despite his uncle's desperate attempts to convince him to flee, the young boy was just as stunned as he was, though more out of fear than anything else as their pursuers made their fast, final approach. ­­
Ford has already ran ahead of Stan with Mabel in tow, but he stopped and turned back around in an instant upon hearing Dipper’s distressed, pleading cry. Without hesitation, the former rebel began racing after the Earth loyalists as they started hauling his nephew away, despite his best attempts to struggle against them and Stan’s best attempts to move and stop this horrific kidnapping before it could even begin. Likewise, Ford shot after the assailants, trying his best to get a clean shot in that wouldn't end up harming Dipper. Tears had already started forming in Mabel’s eyes as she remained secure in Ford’s grip, while her brother was being stolen away from her right in front of her own eyes. Yet both of the twins, even as young as they were, had a dreadful feeling about how all this was going to turn out. And those fears soon came true as Mabel noticed Dipper reaching out his unrestrained hand to her, his eyes wide and wet with terror as his captors refused to relinquish their hold upon him. She extended her arm back out to him, the distance between them far too great for them to even come close to intertwining. Then, in a flash of what seemed almost like magic, the Earth loyalists disappeared into the night, taking Dipper right along with them.
Ford’s blaster hit the ground the moment they all vanished, his eyes wide with shock as he tried to figure out where they might have gone. But all the while, Mabel kept her arm reaching out, a tight sob escaping her as she realized her brother might never meet it again.
For seven years, she kept on reaching for him. It it was only after he finally returned that she found he had stopped reaching back.
“When are we going to find Dipper?” Mabel asked almost constantly within the first 24 hours after his abduction. Stan and Ford could only offer her the terse answer of “soon” as they continued discussing the matter with Rose, Pearl, and Amethyst, all of their voices in hushed, anxious whispers that neither Mabel nor Steven could really hear.
“When are we going to find Dipper?” Mabel asked after a week had passed. By now, almost all the Gems in Crystal Falls had gotten in on the intensive search for the missing boy, all of them more than happy to do anything they could to help two of the humans who were instrumental in saving their world. Things had been largely fruitless so far though; the Earth loyalists had been very smart in covering their tracks to the point that even the most astute Gems couldn't find so much as a trace. But still, Stan and Ford refused to let their mournful niece lose hope that her brother would be returned to her safe and sound. And so once again, they answered “soon” before tucking her into bed for what would no doubt be yet another sleepless night.
“When are we going to find Dipper?” Mabel asked after a month, an exasperated,almost frustrated sigh escaping her along with the question. This question had been a constant every single day now, usually aimed at Stan or Ford or one of the Crystal Gems. And as time went on and the bags under her uncles’ eyes grew darker and deeper and the Gems of Crystal Falls slowly began winding their search efforts down, the answer started to turn from a “soon” to a “we don’t know”.
“When are we going to find-”
“We’re not gonna find him!” Stan slammed his fist down on the table, his expression and tone rife with both grief and anger. A year had passed, a year that had felt like 20 to Mabel, and even if she was still only 6, the weight of just how incredibly long it had been since she had seen Dipper, since they had been happy and together was not lost on her. And yet, for the first time in 365 days, her fretful curiosity was not met with positivity or uncertainty. It was met with a no.
Needless to say that Ford was quick to counter his brother’s harsh reply with sharp disapproval, and soon enough they had launched into a fierce argument. Mabel simply curled herself into a tight ball, hugging her knees to her chest as she dolefully listened to her uncles fight, something that had become a very common occurrence over the past year. She was only half paying attention to their squabble as she settled into her own morose thoughts, but what she did pick up from their unrestrained argument unnerved her to the bone.
“It’s time to stop kidding ourselves, Ford! If he was still here on Homeworld we would have found him already! Chances are those lunatics probably dragged him off back to Earth a long time ago!”
“W-well, then we’ll build a ship! I’ll get Rose, Pearl, and Amethyst to help us! Maybe even recruit some of the other more technologically inclined Gems. We’ll go to Earth a-and bring him back, and-”
“And what?! You honestly expect us to survive ten seconds on Earth when we’re at the top of their most wanted list?! If Greg was still around, then maybe I’d think about it, but on our own? It’s a suicide mission for sure.”
“But we can’t just forget about Dipper, Stanley! Who knows what those… those barbarians have done with him?!”
“I haven’t forgotten about him! The kid’s pretty much the only thing I’ve been thinking about for the past year, but he’s not the only thing we have to protect around here. We gotta think about Mabel now, Ford. They already took one of ‘em; we can’t let them have them both.”
Ford’s half of the argument finally faltered at this, his shoulders sagging in defeat as he turned away bitterly, clearly fighting back tears. Stan let out a long, guilty sigh as he glanced over at Mabel, whose eyes were overflowing with questions about everything she had just heard. And while it had taken almost a year, Stan realized he had finally worked up the nerve to start answering some of them.
Explaining the concept of death to a child who had spent almost her entire life on a planet populated by beings who were practically immortal would have been a hard enough undertaking as it was. But explaining that such a thing could have happened to said child’s very own brother was something else entirely. And it was because of that, that Stan was completely unable to keep tears out of his eyes as he slowly, gently explained to Mabel that he believed the worst had happened to her brother, that their futile search was at last coming to an end, that their family was now forever fractured as a result. That, more than likely, Dipper was dead.
Except no, he wasn’t.
But he might as well have been.
Because from the very moment Dipper had been brutally torn away from his family, his entire life turned upside down in the most horrific of ways. As soon as they had gotten out of Stan and Ford’s immediate range, the Earth loyalists had wasted no time in showing just how ruthless they were by throwing their young captive to the ground roughly and binding him tightly before he could even think of trying to run away. From there, a very long, downright perilous journey commenced, one that Dipper was essentially dragged along the entire way for by his callously cruel captors. All too quickly, the familiar greenery of Crystal Falls started to fade out into the barren, yet mysteriously lovely crystalline scenery of Homeworld that lay beyond the sector’s borders. Needless to say that Dipper was overwhelmed with curiosity and fear about where these loyalists were taking him, but any meek attempt on his part to ask any questions was met with jeering silence, hateful warnings, or even the occasional hard slap or kick. Clearly, his uncles had underplayed just how malicious the Earthlings were in all their light hearted war stories; because these people were wicked, downright heartless even, in ways that Dipper had never in his young life been exposed to before.
As their lengthy trek dragged on into days, even his homesick tears were only met by mocking laughter, his pleas for freedom receiving only cold denial. But even so, Dipper held onto the hope that Stan and Ford would come after him; that they’d beat these brutes back and bring him home to be safe and sound with Mabel once again. Certainly there was no question that they’d come, that they’d find him, that they’d all be reunited as a family once more. Perhaps they were already on their way even as the Earth loyalists continued pulling him across Homeworld’s dry, empty landscapes. He just had to be patient, to keep on hoping, and soon enough they’d be there. He just knew it.
Eventually their travels came to an end as they reached what ended up being a rather well hidden tunnel that led deep underground. Dipper had never really been afraid of the dark, but there was no denying the sudden terror coursing through him as he was shoved into this foreboding darkness, almost as if something inside of him knew that if he went in there, he wouldn’t be coming back out. The trip through the tunnel didn’t last too long before it ended at a large, square room, all four of its towering walls oddly composed of large mirrors, with a small opening in the ceiling high above providing the room’s only natural light. Dipper couldn’t make sense of this bizarre set up as he was shoved into it, the wall to the tunnel closing off behind him and leaving him cornered alone with his captors.
And if he had thought things had been bad before, this was where everything became unimaginably worse.
In a sense, it was almost as if the Earth loyalists didn’t know they had captured a mere child based on how they treated him. Because the unprovoked, merciless beating they gave their young captive in those first few hours would have been horrific enough for an adult. But for a child, it was so, so much worse. Dipper was completely powerless to stop any of the senselessly aggressive blows landed upon him by the much larger adult loyalists, each one of their attacks carrying some kind of venomous slur: “Rebel scum should have been mutated with the rest of them.” “Filthy traitor, just like the rest of his disgusting family.” “If only we’d gotten the girl too, Cipher would have rewarded us twice as much.” And so on and so forth for what seemed like ages until it finally stopped, though it hardly felt like it was over. Dipper could barely move at all as he lay in a crumpled heap on the ground, his own blood pooling around him as he tried to block out the triumphant laughter of his captors, tried to ignore the biting pain that was everywhere, tried to imagine his family breaking that wall down, rushing in and sweeping him off to warmth and safety and away from this waking nightmare.
A nightmare that simply refused to end.
Almost as soon as the beating ended, the interrogation began, though it was nothing better. If anything it was worse, seeing as how the loyalists kept hounding him and hounding him with questions he simply didn’t have any answers for. “Where is the leader of the rebellion?” “Are there more of you filthy rebels out there?” “What kind of weapons are your uncles holing up in that base of theirs?” “How many of those pathetic Gems are allied to your side?” And again and again and again, endless questions that made no sense to him, ones he couldn’t even think to come up with anything for in his battered state that only got worse as he was physically punished for each and every wrong, unknowing answer.
And so it went on like this for quite some time. It was hard to keep track of time in this minimal mirrored space, but Dipper tried in the rare moments whenever his captors weren’t abusing him. By his estimation from the light pouring in from the ceiling, several days had passed, probably more, and still no sign of Stan, Ford, or anyone making even an attempt to save him. But even so, despite how terrible things were, he was still hopeful. Maybe they were just having a difficult time finding him; perhaps they were searching the entire planet over, all in a desperate attempt to learn where he was being held. So he continued to carry that hope, forced it to be the only thing he thought of when the loyalists lay their unforgiving hands on him.
But hope could only get him so far.
Days started to turn into weeks and the loyalists were clearly starting to get impatient with the lack of information they were getting from their young captive. Miraculously, the beatings had lessened, though only because they had realized that they’d probably end up killing him if they kept at it with as much frequent intensity. But the loyalist leader was adamant. He often complained about having been assigned to simply “babysit some rebel brat”, and it was clear he was growing tired of such a doldrum lot. And though the other loyalists warned him against it, he soon decided to take matters into his own hands.
He stormed into the cell lividly one day, a long knife in his hand as he caught Dipper wistfully staring up at the light from above. The leader sneered coldly, quickly catching the boy’s attention and prompting him to scramble to his feet and back away in a fearful, feeble attempt to put some distance between himself and his captor. “Aw… what?” the leader scoffed, his leering smirk hidden behind his concealing mask. “You think your uncles are gonna come swoop in here and save you? Please.” The leader laughed darkly as he suddenly kicked Dipper cleanly in the stomach, knocking him back roughly before he grabbed him by the front of his shirt and forced him up to his level. “Face it, kid: those has-beens aren’t coming for you. And can you really blame them? Look at you? Scrawny, weak, pathetic. Who would even want you? If we were back on Earth, then you’d have been somebody’s target practice by now. You’re a waste, just like this entire worthless planet is. But hey, if you wanna keep staring up at the sky with that pointless hope of yours, then be my guest! In fact…” the leader’s voice dropped low and sinister as he lifted his knife, eliciting a small, fearful whimper out of Dipper as he held it dangerously close to his face. “I’ll even help you get a better view!”
In a movement so fast Dipper couldn’t have even seen it coming, the leader lashed his blade out, its sharp tip catching the upper half of his face before swiping across his eyes in a swift, fluid movement. The boy was powerless to hold back an absolutely agonized scream at this, pain overwhelming his every sense as the leader carelessly dropped him with a sadistic chuckle, watching him writhe in anguish as the heavy wound poured with thick, dark blood. In a pathetic attempt to block out the pain, Dipper closed his cut eyes as much as he could, sobbing miserably as he forgot about everything else but the anguish, so deep and so unbearable that it eventually ended up sweeping him into the void of unconsciousness altogether.
He didn’t know exactly when it was that he opened his eyes again; but when he did, he was met with nothing but both lasting pain and the sight of complete and absolute nothingness. There was no color, no shapes, nothing. And yet, he could still feel the ground below him, could hear his own sharp, panicked breathing as clear as day. So why couldn’t he see?
And then it struck him. The memory of a knife ripping across his eyes. His sight being torn away from him at that horrible moment. The blood still stuck to his face from the wound running almost entirely across his face. The incredibly crippling fear that he would never see anything ever again.
Stan had used a word for such a condition before, but Dipper was hard pressed to remember it. Blonde? Blunde? Blind? Blind sounded the most correct out of those, so that was what he went with to describe the unfamiliar sensation, but it still hardly helped him feel better. Because now, all he could do was weakly pull himself up to sit and try to feel his way around, grasping at nothing but empty air before finally reaching the smooth surface of one of the mirror walls boxing him in. As he touched it’s cold exterior, Dipper couldn’t help but feel as though something else was wrong too, aside from the horrific fact that his eyes seemed to no longer work. For the first time since he had gotten here, the room was completely silent. No sound of jeering loyalists, or threatening footsteps or anything else really. His non-existent vision was useless in giving him any actual information, but as far as he could tell without it, the loyalists were gone. He waited in silence, unable to tell how much time had passed anymore with all sense of light now stolen away from him, for those footsteps to return, for their wicked mocking to resume, for the pain he had grown so accustomed to by now to continue but… it never did. He could have waited for years and they never would have returned. And after about what felt like a month or so, Dipper finally allowed himself to feel some form of relief from that.
That relief was short lived however as he realized that the loyalists had essentially abandoned him in a prison he had no power to escape from even when he did have his eyesight. But now, as blinded and weak as he was, he was even more trapped than ever before. The only way he managed to actually survive was through the small constant trickle of water that came in through a pipe installed at the corner of the cell. As far as food went, it was rather sparse for the first few weeks, with the only thing he had to rely on being the scraps of bread he had wisely managed to save from whatever meager helpings the loyalists had thrown his way. Still, as time went on and that supply started to run out, he quickly began to fade. His injuries, while slowly healing on their own, were still not properly treated and his stomach was filled with only a deep, aching hunger that the tiny scraps he was trying his best to preserve could not satisfy. But still, he knew he had to hold out; Stan and Ford and Mabel were coming to save him, he had to keep reminding himself. They were coming to save him and take him home and he didn’t even care if he wouldn’t be able to see them because just hearing his sister’s voice again would be enough.
And so he sat tight in that cell, sitting directly under the light from above, his unseeing eyes staring off at nothing as he spent his empty time repeating that hopeful mantra to himself over and over and over again. “They’re gonna come…” he began in a whisper, his voice hoarse and shaky from a lack of use but even so he kept going. “They’re gonna come find me… They’re going to save me… T-they… they do want me… They’re coming… They’re on their way here right now… T-they’ll be here soon… I… I know it...”
Many days were spent like this, with him whispering these gentle, but comforting promises to himself, desperately clinging onto the idea that they were real, that they would come true. That they were more than just an empty, meaningless dream.
His energy soon started to wane more and more each day as his stock of food grew dangerously low. With not even enough strength left to remain sitting up, he eventually resorted to lying in place, though his self-reassurance didn’t stop. Occasionally, whenever he’d fall asleep, he’d find himself back home in Crystal Falls, bright and happy and colorful as he sat at the dinner table with Mabel, Stan, and Ford, all of them laughing warmly as they ate deliciously to their hearts’ content. And then, he’d open his eyes once again and be met with absolutely nothing once more, his heart and hopes sinking lower and lower every single time.
However, it was during one of these wistful dreams that his usual empty routine was abruptly interrupted. Upon feeling something unfamiliar brush against his leg, Dipper flinched awake, instinctually glancing down only to bitterly remember sight was no longer a privilege he had. So instead, he reached down, feeling his way as he often did until he made contact with the small, brightly chirping creature who had happened to invade his cell. The more he felt this seemingly amicable being out, the more he realized its bumpty round hardened surface felt… familiar. In fact, the more he thought about it, this thing seemed to be exactly like the small, friendly Geodite creatures that the forests of Crystal Falls were littered with. The thought of home was enough to elicit a small smile from Dipper as he forced himself to sit up, despite the painful protest his starving stomach gave him, so he could properly greet the first real semblance of company he had in quite some time.
“Hey there, little guy,” he began, his voice still rather weak as he allowed the friendly Geodite to crawl into his lap as he continued stroking it. “You’re a long way from home, aren’t you? I know what that’s like… How did you get in here? Did you climb down from all the way up there?” The Geodite, seeming to understand, let out a bright chirp in response, one that Dipper couldn’t help but let out a small laugh at. Even though it wasn’t much, the very thought of not being so alone anymore managed to brighten his spirits just a bit. But at the same time, it also made him think of something else, something he hadn’t before. Something that could very well finally end up being his ticket out of here. “Wait… you came from up there…” he nodded upward, wishing so much that he could see that promising beam of light once more. “That means… you could go get help! Quick! Go back up there and find my Grunkle Stan and Grunkle Ford! A-and Mabel too! Especially Mabel… I… I miss her so much… I wonder if she misses me too…”
The Geodite interrupted his pensive thoughts with an excitable chirp as it suddenly lept from his lap, scurrying away until the only thing Dipper could make out were its clattering footsteps as he began walking against one of the mirror walls. It stopped somewhere above him, chirping encouragingly this time as Dipper frowned and shook his head sadly. “I… I’m sorry… I can’t see you… o-or anything really…” The Geodite simply chirped again before its skittering continued until it gradually disappeared into silence, leaving Dipper to morosely realize that he was left alone once again.
Or so he thought; for just a few hours later, the Geodite finally returned, though it wasn’t alone. Several more seemed to follow it, all of them cheerfully “singing” as they made their way down to Dipper, who was admittedly confused as one of them seemed to push something towards him. It was only as he picked the object up and felt out its soft, smooth, sweet-smelling texture that he excitedly realized exactly what this was. “Fruit!” he gasped in shock, not hesitating to take a generous first bite. Its immediate sweetness filled him with immeasurable relief as he realized that he was actually going to have something resembling decent food since his capture. Yet the Geodites weren’t finished yet, for as he gave them his wholehearted thanks, they presented him with even more pieces of fruit, as well as nuts and even a few vegetables. Needless to say that Dipper was quite confused as to where they had ascertained all this food from seeing as how such plants (or any plants really) weren’t native to Homeworld, which left him to assume that a terraformed sector, much like Crystal Falls, couldn’t have been too far away from wherever his underground cell was. But even so, the Geodites didn’t stop off at one delivery; they kept their self-started food service going, supplying Dipper with as much food as he could hope to eat.
It took a little time, but eventually his energy, as well as his drive returned to him, inspiring him with the motivation to try and finally find a way out of his cell. Even if he was essentially stumbling in the dark, he still walked along the perimeter of the room, feeling his way against the glass walls in the hopes that one of them wielded a door. Unfortunately, there were all completely seamless, with no apparent exit in sight which only left him with one other option: trying to break the glass itself. And so he tried and tried and tried and tried but it never seemed to so much as even crack. Even throwing one of the willing Geodites into it did nothing to dent his longtime prison. After weeks and weeks, his escape efforts started to diminish along with his hope. Even if he did have suffice food and water and company, he still lacked the one thing that he was yearning for the most, something that he hadn’t known for so very long that he was starting to forget what it even felt like: freedom.
Every now and then he’d give himself that reminder that his family was still out there looking for him, but that was starting to become less and less frequent as the days went by. When the Geodites first came to him, he’d pass the time by recounting what stories he could remember from before his capture, stories of him and Mabel and all the fun they used to have together but as time went on, those stories started to blur within his memory. He held no question in his mind about Mabel and his connection to her or Stan or Ford, but the specifics seemed to be fading away as months passed on into years. And as those years came and went so too did the hope that he’d ever step foot out of that cell.
But certainly, he tried to reason with himself amidst empty days only occasionally broken by a Geodite generously delivering him his next meal, they were still looking for him.
Certainly, he rationalized as his blank, blinded eyes stared at the ground in front of him, his mind starting to forget what things like color, light, or even his own sister’s face even looked like, they would be coming any day now.
Certainly, he thought as he lay down to sleep only for his once hopeful dreams of home gradually stopped altogether, they would find him.
Certainly… he realized, tears starting to fall from his clouded, ruined eyes as his heart broke and his hope finally died, they had abandoned him, just like everybody else.
And that’s exactly what he believed for the next three years, his heart turning as cold and hard as the unyielding mirrors all around him. Until the day they finally did come.
Which only made his heart turn even colder.
Seven years.
Seven years.
Seven years he had been gone, six of which she had presumed him to be dead. She had given up hope, just as her uncles had, of ever seeing him again. He had been captured and killed, far too young true, but killed nonetheless. That was it, wasn’t it? End of story, nothing more to tell. Except it wasn’t the end.
Because here he was, standing right before her. Her brother, so long thought to have died a tragic, undeserved death, had been alive all these years, hidden away deep underground miles away from Crystal Falls.
For Mabel, there couldn’t have possibly been anything more miraculous than this.
And yet… for as much as this was so unquestionably Dipper, she found that there was so much about him that… wasn’t. He was so much gaunter and paler than he should have been, his hair an overgrown, scrubby mess and his clothes much too small for his now 12 year old body. But then there were his eyes, which had struck her to the core when she had first seen them. Grey and cloudy and unfocused as opposed to the warm, alert brown they should have been, the deep, wide mark of an old, settled scar discolorating the skin around them almost like a mask. Eyes that carried such a haunted, lost look to them that it completely chilled her in every way. Eyes that seemed to be set in a perpetually piercing stare in nothing in particular at all. Eyes that, as she quickly found out, had been completely and utterly blind for the past several years as he sat in this cold, hollow prison all by himself, waiting for help that never came.
Tears of relief and sympathy flooded her eyes as she rushed to embrace him, but on instinct he flinched away from her touch. His panicky manner became even more apparent when he heard Steven and Lapis speak up, his blindness barring both of them from his perception as he tried and failed to place voices to faces and faces to names. Mabel tried to ease him, tried to calm him down, but this attempt was only met with a kind of hostility she hadn’t been expecting. Dipper’s anxious manner soon turned fierce as he addressed her, not looking in her direction as he spoke to the open air and harshly accused her of forgetting about him, of leaving him to rot alone in this cell while she lived the safe, free, happy life he had never really known. Mabel could scarcely believe what she was hearing, and as much as she wanted to argue that not a day had gone by in which she hadn’t thought about him, hadn’t hoped against hope that he was somehow still alive and that they’d somehow be reunited once again, she didn’t. Instead, she simply took his hand and slowly led him out of the cell that had been his home for the past seven years, giving him his first taste of renewed freedom that, from here on out, would only ever be tentative at best.
“You stopped?! What do you mean you stopped?! How could you just… just stop looking for me?!”
“Cut us some slack, kid! Its been seven years! Can you really blame us for expecting the worst after those Earthling wackjobs took you?!”
“Yes, I can! You just gave up completely! Did you even wonder what they did to me down there?! What I’ve been through the past seven years of my life?!”
“We don’t need to wonder, Dipper. W-we can see… And we’re sorry if we threw in the towel too early, but-”
“You’re sorry? I spent over half my life buried underground, nearly starved to death, and went blind, and you’re just sorry?!”
Once again, Mabel found herself curled up into a small, fretful ball, her knees snuggled under her shawl as she silently sat on the sidelines while her brother and uncles duked it out in by far the most vitriolic argument she had ever seen. Really, if she had to pick a side in it, she would have certainly been on Dipper’s, mostly because she had always felt some small inkling in her heart that giving up the search for him had been wrong somehow. And even though that inkling turned out to be right, things still were far from blissful and happy like she had always dreamed they would be if her brother ever returned. In fact, things were anything but that as Dipper, Stan, and Ford continued to fight, their argument echoing brutally throughout the shack. Even Steven’s comforting hand on her shoulder did little to ease her worry, which only spiked upon hearing her brother’s intentions of going off-planet.
“W-wait… you’re what?” she finally spoke up, sitting upright in her seat as she looked to him with wide eyes.
“You heard me,” Dipper answered coldly, still looking at nothing as he responded. “I’m leaving. I’m not about to stay here and be a prisoner on this planet or in this family anymore! I want to be free for a change. And I know I’ll never, ever be that here.”
“Dipper, that’s absurd,” Ford remarked incredulously. “You can’t leave Homeworld to openly traverse the depths of space on your own. You’re much too-”
“Much too what? Young? Blind?” Dipper challenged crossly, his hands in tight fists at his sides. “I don’t see why any of that matters, seeing as how I’ve been on my own for the past seven years and managed to survive just fine all by myself!”
“Kid, don’t be stupid about this,” Stan scowled authoritatively. “You wouldn’t last two seconds out there, not with all those Earth ships roaming around everywhere. Besides, you said so yourself; you’ve been gone for seven years. As far as we’re concerned, you’re gonna stay right here and make up for all that lost time.”
“You still don’t get it, do you?” Dipper asked harshly. “Do you really think we can all just go right back to being some perfect, happy little family again after you guys just forgot about me!?”
“Dipper, w-we didn’t forget about you…” Mabel said, her voice fragile as she stepped over to him and placed a hand on his shoulder, frowning as he flinched from the unexpected contact. “We just… we… we didn’t know that you were… we-”
“You didn’t care,” he cut her off coldly, his blinded eyes set in a fierce, unforgiving glare as he pulled his shoulder away from her. He said nothing more as he turned and started feeling his way towards the door. While Stan made a move to try and stop him, Ford held him back, shaking his head sadly as he watched his battered, broken, bittered nephew leave as he placed the blame for his years upon years of endless suffering upon them all. Which, in so many ways, was a perfectly sensible thing to do.
But even so, Mabel hurried after her brother, intent on keeping him from disappearing from her life once again. Because even seven years later, she was still reaching out for him, even if she knew, deep down, that her extended hand had found him far too little and far too late.
Mabel knew she should have been happy for Dipper as she watched Steven heal his longstanding blindness, but the only thing she could do was frown as that healing spit worked its magic. As Dipper flinched back, closing his eyes and covering them out of surprise first before he slowly opened them once more. As he gasped, his returned brown eyes widening as they finally saw again for the first time in seven years. As tears started to well up in those eyes at how overwhelming it all was as he finally looked over to her in complete shock, as if he was seeing her for the first time ever.
Which, in a way, he was.
And in that moment, the way he smiled at her, the way he said her name with such awe and happiness in his voice, truly made her think that perhaps things might finally turn out alright. This feeling only grew as they mutually embraced, tears in both of their eyes now as the sheer triumph of the moment spoke louder than any words could. This was it, Mabel though with a contented sigh. This was exactly what had been missing the past several years. This was how everything was supposed to be.
Except it wasn’t meant to last.
Because all too quickly their hug disbanded, all too quickly Dipper glanced longingly back at the ship he had been trying to steal just moments ago, all too quickly Mabel remembered exactly why she had been hesitant about Steven healing him in the first place. Because with his vision restored, now there was absolutely nothing stopping Dipper from leaving, this time on his own accord.
As Steven and Lapis both put forth efforts to try and coax him into staying, Mabel could only stand there in silence, shellshocked by how quickly everything had been unfolding. They had only just found him yesterday, but here he was, set to be taken away once more. She couldn’t really blame him for wanting to leave though, there was no way she could have; because if their roles had been reversed and she had been trapped in one place for as long as he had, then she likely would have wanted to chase freedom just as much as he did.
Perhaps if she had at least some of his boldness, then she would have boarded that ship with him. Perhaps if it was just the two of them, with no friends or family or anything else on Homeworld to worry about, she would have joined him in sailing through the stars, both of them finally together like they should have always been. Perhaps she would have… but she didn’t. Instead, she only watched, tears in his eyes as he departed, knowing that the chances of her ever seeing him again were small but at the very least he was alive and free as opposed to the alternative she had grown up believing was true. Still, that didn’t stop her from reaching her hand out after his ship as it drifted higher and higher into the atmosphere, before it disappeared from view entirely.
Only this time, he didn’t reach back.
Dipper had known, from the moment he touched down on Homeworld again, that this was a bad idea. That certainly he’d be followed here, that he’d lead those Earthlings right to the very place where his family still resided. And while he didn’t really have his doubts that Stan and Ford would be able to fend off a few kids from Earth, he did start to worry when Lapis ended up being the one to first discover him and his wrecked ship in the forest of Crystal Falls. He supposed he should have counted himself as lucky that it hadn’t been Mabel, for certainly she would have dragged him back to the shack to tell Stan and Ford everything that he knew, something that he was far too uncomfortable to do so soon after returning. Fortunately, Lapis was much more patient with him, and through that patience, an unexpected bond began to form.
Even before his initial capture, Dipper had never gotten close to any Gems, including even the Crystal Gems who lived essentially right next door to his family. Even though they were practically everywhere, he had never really had any interest in befriending any of them, mostly since a large majority of them seemed to be so emotionally dry and distant. Lapis, however, was a stark exception to that, an example of a Gem who wore her metaphorical heart on her sleeve as well as her open curiosity, something that Dipper couldn’t help but relate to. And so the unlikely pair steadily developed a genuine friendship, with Lapis coming by every day as Dipper continued repairing his crashed ship. As almost therapeutic as their peaceful time together was though, he knew it wasn’t meant to last, for as Lapis professed her hopes that he would stay on Homeworld, Dipper found that his growing guilt and dread would no longer let him remain silent about the threat he knew was soon to come. And after telling Lapis about his perilous escape from Earth first, she urged him to go divulge it all to his family, knowing that they would need such pertinent information if they ever wanted to keep Crystal Falls, or Homeworld as a whole, safe. But how could he just go and tell them that he had led this threat right to their door? How could he admit to his uncles that they had been right all along? How could he apologize to Mabel for leaving her again, which was exactly what he had every intention of doing once this disaster was said and done?
But in the end, he did go and tell them, if for no one else than for Lapis. His resolve to remain professional nearly melted as Mabel rushed up to him, throwing her arms around him in a hug that she never thought she’d get to have again. Yet as much as he wanted to return her embrace, he didn’t as he instead forced his manner to remain cold and unmoved while he stoically warned his uncles of the coming Earth invasion, watching stonefaced as their initial reaction rose into frantic panic. Then, with his message delivered, he slipped out once again, his refusal to let himself fall back into his own family just as staunch and hardened as ever.
And once again, he completely missed his sister’s outstretched hand as he walked out, her heart reaching after him in the hopes that he would stay with her this time, but knowing that was far too much to hope for.
“Well, well, well… looks like things just got a lot more interesting…”
Dipper gasped as he found that the very first thing he was met with upon pulling himself out of the crashed ship’s wreckage was the pitchy voice of the demon who held domain over the entire Earth and all its vast empire. The very demon he had risked life and limb to escape from during his flight from that chaoitc planet, who should have been back on Earth seeing as how he had merely just sent two of his cronies to do his work for him. Yet now, Pacifica was nowhere to be found while Gideon simply stood by, fuming at how Bill was apparently ignoring his proposal to make a deal to take out the Pines family, as well as Steven and Lapis, who had been unfortunate enough to get caught up in all this. But instead, the demon’s singular eye now held focus on Dipper, who couldn’t deny the flash of terror that struck him as that imposing triangular form cast an oppressive shadow over him.
“Hey there, Pine Tree! I was wondering where you ran off to. Guess my hunch about you crawling back to this boring ol’ hunk of rock was right, huh?” Bill began quite effervescently, though as he noticed Dipper attempting to back away, he was quick to reposition himself right behind the boy in a flash. “Whoa, not so fast, kid! You don’t wanna miss out on what could very well be the best deal you’ll ever make, do ya?”
“W-what?” Dipper asked, not having the context to really know what the demon was talking about.
“Hey!” Gideon shouted in sudden outrage as he sent Bill an appalled glare. “I was the one who summoned you here, Bill! I thought you were gonna make a deal with me!”
“Oh, yeah, I was gonna do that,” Bill shrugged nonchalantly. “Until a much better alternative came along.” The demon’s tone dropped low and sinister as he pointed his cane over at Dipper, who was still completely lost amidst this unknown turn of events. “So… see ya, Gideon!” With another flick of his cane, Bill managed to completely take control of Gideon’s amulet, resulting in his own telekinesis being used against him to fling him far away from the Kindergarten crash site and freeing the demon up to get back to business. “Now, Pine Tree, where were we…?”
“L-Leave him alone!” Mabel shouted as Bill started circling her brother almost threateningly. The only reason she hadn’t ran over to pull Dipper away herself was because of the steady hold Stan had on her arm, keeping her held back just as much as she had been held back the first time he had been stolen away from her seven years ago. Only now, with a threat so much more dangerous and unpredictable as Bill Cipher, her complete inability to do anything to help Dipper felt so, so much worse.
“So listen up, Pine Tree, cause I don’t like to repeat myself,” Bill said as casually as ever, ignoring Mabel’s fearful cry. “You may not know this since you’ve been all blind and buried for so many years, but back on Earth, I’m pretty much the most powerful guy around. Time manipulation, the ability to change anything and anyone with a blink of an eye, endless amounts of magic your feeble human brain couldn’t even hope to comprehend, you know, the works! But here on silly old Homeworld, things are a bit… different. This planet’s outta my hands, which is something I plan on changing pretty soon, but for now, I kinda can't interact with this place physically without a vessel. So I need a little… help, if ya catch my drift…” s on edge as he already was by the dream demon’s mere presence alone, Dipper slowly shook his head, finally realizing just how fast his heart was pounding as he tried his hardest to reconcile his complete and utter terror. Still, Bill simply sighed in exasperation and rolling his eye before he explained. “My drift is this: you let me possess you, let me take the reins and sit in your control seat for a while, so I can finally get rid of what’s left of your stupid, annoying family! Heck, since you’re so un-Pines compared to all the rest of them, I’ll even let you walk away with your life when it’s all said and done as my way of saying thanks! Sounds like a pretty good plan, doesn’t it, kid?”
For a moment there were no words that Dipper could find to describe just how absolutely appalled he was by this incredibly gruesome idea. The fact that Bill Cipher, of all the beings in the universe, wanted to use him as a tool to destroy his own family, that he wanted him to agree to let such a thing happen? It was beyond twisted and cruel. In fact, he was so shocked by it that he couldn’t even properly express anything but absolute dumbfoundment at it when he finally did manage to respond to it. “I… I don’t understand…” he choked, shaking his head once more. “W-why… what makes you think I would ever say yes to something like that?”
“Why wouldn’t you say yes to something like that?” Bill retorted calmly. “Think about this for a sec, Pine Tree. These three?” he threw a hand out towards Mabel, Stan, and Ford. “They let a bunch of Earth squares steal you away when you were only 5 years old. And then what did they do? What did they do while you were beaten and battered almost constantly for weeks on end? What did they do when someone ran a knife over your eyes until you were completely and totally blind? What did they do when you were left for dead in that empty cell for seven years with nothing but a bunch of dumb old rocks and your own pathetic, unfulfilled dreams to keep you company? Oh, that’s right! They did nothing!”
Dipper shuddered at this, hating to admit that every single thing the demon was saying was true but knowing in his heart that it was. He had languished, suffered, hoped in vain for so long that they would come for him, but they never did until after all the hope he had left in him had long since died. And even then, they had only managed to stumble upon him on accident. Stan and Ford had even said so themselves that they had stopped looking for him only a year after his disappearance. This was something he had thought about frequently, ever since he had been set free, and every time he did, it only made him ache with the belief that his own family had cared so very little about him that they had just given up on him completely. And really, it was a large part of the reason he had already given up on them.
“Really, kid, it only makes sense,” Bill continued, fighting rationality upon seeing that his manipulation was seemingly working. “I mean, you don’t even wanna be part of their family anymore anyway, so why not just do yourself a favor and lighten this whole ‘rebellious legacy’ load off your shoulders? At least then, you wouldn’t have to keep running away all the time.”
“Dipper! Don’t listen to him! Please” Mabel cried once again, pulling against Stan’s grip, though it held fest, lest she break free and throw herself into the same danger her brother was in.
“Seriously, kid, he’s lying to you!” Stan shouted adamantly, wanting to believe that, despite all of the abuse he had been through in his young life, that his nephew was smarter than this. “You really think he won’t off you the second he’s through with all of us?! Because that’s not how that psychopath works, believe us.”
“Stanley’s right,” Ford agreed, the immense worry in his otherwise tight expression. “Dipper, you can’t trust him, he only wants to-”
“Hey, how about you three butt out for a sec and let Pine Tree decide here?” Bill cut their pleas off sharply before turning back to Dipper. “See what I mean, kid? The only thing they care about is saving their own hides. That’s exactly why they never bothered to look for you even ten minutes outside their own backyard. Guess they didn’t think you were worth the effort.”
“No, we did think you were worth it, Dipper!” Mabel protested fiercely, though she kept at it as Dipper finally glanced over at her, clear conflict filling his expression. “I never wanted to stop looking for you! I always hoped that you were still alive and out there somewhere and I was right. A-and I know you’re mad at us for taking so long to find you, but you can’t do this. Please, Dipper… I-I can’t lose you again, not like this…”
Dipper could still scarcely even think of what to say amidst being pressed on all sides, but for what seemed like ages he kept his frightened, anxious, uncertain gaze on Mabel, who could only meet it with tears after she finished her appeal. She desperately hoped that it would be enough to sway him against such an awful deal, that he’d staunchly turn Bill down and finally come to stand with his family once more. Yet… it really didn’t seem to be enough, for instead of keeping his sights on her, he gradually glanced over to Lapis, who had simply been standing along with Steven in tense silence this entire time, neither of them having the faintest clue about what to do to stop this. As Dipper made eye contact with her, the most the blue Gem could do was softly shake her head, her eyes wide with unabridged terror at the thought of losing the boy she had just grown so close to like this. And yet, it was only as Dipper saw that terror that he realized what would happen if he said no to the demon’s twisted aspirations. Even if he refused, then Bill would always be able to find someone else, someone much more willing even, like Gideon for instance, to carry out his sadistic plans. And then, none of them, no one on Homeworld at all, would be safe, including his family, including Mabel, including Steven, including Lapis. No one would be able to stop the insane demon from doing whatever violent, demented thing he wanted, including destroying anything and anyone who stood in his path of conquest and chaos. If he said no, then there would be no telling what might happen.
Which was exactly why he had to say yes.
“So, kid, have you made up your mind yet?” Bill asked with faux boredom. “Because I’m a very busy demon, what with ruling my own intergalactic empire and everything, and I haven’t got all-””
“I’ll do it,” Dipper spoke up, squaring his shoulders and putting on his bravest face as he thought about exactly what this would entail for him. Even so, he had a plan, one that was only really tentative at best and one that would only really lead him to even more suffering than he had already known, but at least this time, it would all be on his own terms.
Needless to say that the reaction to his staunch agreement was intense. Mabel was the first to lash out, finally pulling herself out of Stan’s hold as a loud scream of protest tore from her. Lapis wasn’t far behind, her wings summoned as she rushed forward, tears forming in her eyes as she hurried to try and stop this deal from going through by any means necessary. Unfortunately, while Bill didn’t have much power on Homeworld, he did have enough to erect a blue fiery barrier, one that easily barred Mabel, Lapis, and anyone else from breaking this arrangement while still giving them a front row seat to it all.
“Yeesh, so much drama with you rebels!” Bill rolled his eye caustically. “I gotta admit, I’ll kinda miss that about you chumps… but not for long! So, Pine Tree, are you finally ready to get even for all those long years of abuse and abandonment? Cause if you are, then all it takes is just one simple handshake…” At this, the demon held his hand out, blue flames sparking over it as he presented it to Dipper, who simply looked between it and Bill himself with cold acceptance. He was ready for this, whatever it was, he told himself. He had spent seven years in blinded emptiness, how could this be much worse than that?
And yet, he still looked over at the pair who had rushed forth in vain to try and save him, both of them looking to him tearfully and still begging him not to go through with this. His resolve nearly crumbled upon meeting Mabel’s miserable expression, but it came back to him when he saw Lapis’. For seven years he had dreamed of nothing but freedom, and now, he was going to give that freedom up, more than likely forever, just to save the two people he was still absolutely certain he cared about.
It was probably the most worthy sacrifice he could think of, if he was perfectly honest with himself.
So, with a deep breath and closed eyes, he took the demon’s hand, allowing his own to be pulled down in shake that locked everything in place. And from there, everything seemed to happen all at once.
The very first thing he felt was pain, pain that was so fierce and so intense that it made the anguish of having that knife torn across his eyes feel like a mere scratch by comparison. But as the pain died out, as all his senses died out really, they were replaced with something else, something that seemed to overwhelm every single fiber of his being: power. Or at least he thought it was power, because what it really was was something far beyond what his mortal mind could even begin to comprehend. In fact, the only things he knew of it were that it was rich, strong, tantalizing, chaotic, uncontrollable, and his. But it wasn’t really. Rather it belonged to the miasmic, sinister, unquestionably insane entity that was quickly flooding his consciousness, splitting it cleanly in half and brutally pushing him aside as it easily took control of everything, all while he was left adrift inside his own completely ravaged mind, desperately trying to recover from the shock of it all before it was too late. 
Mabel let out a tearful gasp as the wall of fire finally fell, allowing her to see that Bill was gone, but Dipper was still there, his eyes still shut and his body rigid and unmoving as she hurried over to him, Lapis following not too far behind. By the time she had almost reached him, however, he started to do something she hadn’t been expecting: laugh. As the laughter rose in volume and grew more manic, she realized that it was indeed in Dipper’s voice, but at the same time, it was also Bill’s. Both voices were completely unified as his laughter rose to triumphant levels, his eyes opening to reveal that one of them was still a natural, normal brown, while the other was sharply slitted against bright, piercing, glowing yellow, telling Mabel only one thing. That the worst had indeed happened. That her brother had been taken away from her yet again, only this time, she would never get him back. That he wasn’t even Dipper anymore, that he couldn’t be with with someone like Bill running wild and free inside his mind. Bipper… she concluded briefly, the name sounding so very wrong, even inside her own mind. Still, she was so heartbroken by what was happening that she couldn’t even allow herself to feel any form of betrayal towards him for what he had just done. Even if that betrayal was something that the newly dubbed “Bipper” was more than happy to remind them all off.
“Ah, now this is more like it!” he exclaimed proudly, his voice still a twisted mix of Bill’s and Dipper’s, though there was clearly more of a demonic edge to it. “It’s been so long since I’ve needed one of these flesh sacks that I almost forgot what being inside one of them is like! Still, I owe you one for being so nice and compliant about all this, Pine Tree! So,” his demented grin grew as he began to lift off the ground, blue flames curling up upon both of his hands as he hovered over his targets with sadistic glee. “What do you say we get started, huh? Oh, that’s right! You’re probably still trying to pull your measly human mind back together after having so much limitless cosmic power crammed into it all at once! Well then, don’t worry, kid! You just sit back, relax and enjoy the show. I’ll take it from here…”
Bipper let out another absolutely wild laugh at this, his yellow eye sparking with murderous intent while his flames grew larger as he prepared to rain them down upon his unprepared foes. Stan and Ford and Steven were all absolutely shellshocked by what they were seeing, none of them scarcely able to believe it while Lapis let out a harsh, broken sob at how far Dipper had fallen. But all Mabel could do was reach out to him once more, tears refusing to leave her eyes as she hoped that somehow, someway, this twisted nightmare would finally end, that she’d wake up and he’d be there and they’d be happy again, just like they had been so many years ago.
But of course, no matter how much she reached, it was never to be.
For suddenly, right before Bipper could bring his flames down, they abruptly died out, much to his apparent surprise. “Huh?!” he glanced at his hands in shock, clearly trying to bring the flames back only for him to suddenly go flying back in mid air towards the entrance of the Kindergarten behind him. “Hey! What do you think you’re doing, kid?!” He let out a sudden anguished shout at this, his limbs struggling to break free of some kind of invisible bondage as his expression changed from confusion to absolute raw fury. “For almost my entire life I’ve always been somebody’s prisoner,” he began fiercely, Dipper’s voice clearly starting to overpower Bill’s. “I practically grew up inside a jail cell I couldn’t even see. I missed out on everything my life should have been! And even after I thought I was finally free, I didn’t even get to enjoy it before your stupid forces came along and captured me all over again! But no more; I’m through with being trapped and tortured everywhere I go! Now it’s your turn to be locked away and forgotten, Bill! Let’s see how you like it!”
With another harsh shout, he pulled himself back even more, a blue glow igniting around his hands, one that transferred to the rocks surrounding the Kindergarten’s tunnel entrance. “Whoa! Wait! P-Pine Tree, stop!” Bipper gasped as the other half of him realized exactly what was about to happen here and fought in vain for control against it. “W-what about your revenge?! This is your one chance to take out your neglectful family and you’re completely wasting it just to put me away?! Don’t you realize you’re doing the exact same thing to yourself!? You’ve lost it!”
“No,” he replied to himself coldly, his expression a resolved glare as he looked to both Lapis and Mabel, finally smiling just the slightest bit as his hand moved to bring the rocks down on his telekinetic command. “I haven’t.”
“Dipper!” Mabel cried in an absolute panic as the impending cave in began, the rocks falling hard and heavy before him. The Kindergarten itself was closed off completely on the inside, with its one entrance also being its only exit, and Bipper had brazenly, intentionally landed on the wrong side of the momentous pile of rocks. Meaning that once all of them fell, he’d be trapped inside indefinitely, something that Mabel couldn’t let happen, but was ultimately completely powerless to stop.
“Augh! Stupid kid!” Bipper shouted in blind rage, his limbs trembling wildly as he desperately tried and failed to wrest back control. “This wasn’t the deal! When I take control back from you, I’m gonna make you wish you were never born!” The other half of him simply let out a soft, almost accepting sigh at this, his fury dissipating into calm acceptance of his fate as he closed his eyes, not wanting to see that final look of desperate anguish on Mabel’s face as the last of the rocks fell. “Too late,” he muttered calmly, mentally preparing himself for the nearly endless internal conflict to come. “I already do.”
And just like that, he was gone, the final rock falling as Mabel collapsed to her knees with a broken sob, her hand still held out, just like it always was, for the brother who had just condemned himself to an eternity of imprisoned torment. The brother who had given away every part of himself, including his highly sought after freedom, just to save her life. The brother who would certainly never be able to reach his hand back to her now, even if he wanted to.
She missed him.
She thought she had missed him before, when she was but a teary-eyed five year old who kept thinking that he’d come home “any minute now”. She thought she had missed him after he had taken off on that ship to parts unknown, presumably never to return. But now? Now she missed him so much that it almost physically hurt her. Because now she could go down to the entrance of that Kindergarten at the edge of the sector literally any time she wanted to. Now she could place her hand against that impenetrable rock wall, she could imagine him on the other side of it, wrestling against the demon he had let into his mind with every ounce of resistance he had in him, she could whisper her tearful promises to find a way to help him, no matter how it might take. Promises that were largely more wishes than they were actual promises.
Still it seemed that her and Lapis were really the only ones who were making any kind of effort to do something about Dipper’s plight. The Crystal Gems were clueless when it came to a being as tricky and enigmatic as Bill Cipher, the Fusions’ Logs offered literally no assistance, and most frustrating to Mabel, Stan and Ford seemed to be very hands off about the whole thing. One night, not too many weeks after Dipper had trapped himself and Bill away, her frustration finally exploded into full on rage as she shouted at her uncles, fiercely demanding why they seemed to be doing nothing to even try to help their own nephew, why they were seeming to be giving up on him all over again. Their rebuttal was that they wanted to help Dipper, they really, really did, but they simply didn’t know enough about Bill and the extent of his abilities to do anything that would be safe for the good of Homeworld at large. As it stood, the merciless demon who had single handedly conquered Earth had finally been subdued and sealed away, inside the body of a twelve year old who had locked them both inside a barren Kindergarten, true, but sealed away nonetheless. Which meant that for now at least, the planet was safe.
But that was far from good enough for Mabel.
Despite how much of a failure Lapis’ attempts at helping Dipper had been thus far, Mabel couldn’t help but admire how hard she was trying. The blue Gem had researched extensively on the mysterious demon, had tried to terraform around the Kindergarten, had even gone as far as to fuse with the brutish Jasper into the massive, merciless Malachite in the hopes of decimating that rock wall, a plan that had only left Lapis with more scars than successes when it was all said and done. And even if none of her ideas were working, Mabel wished that she had even a fraction of the blue Gem’s verve, because as things were, she felt so completely useless. Dipper had saved all their lives, perhaps even all of Homeworld itself, and what did he get as a reward for his courageous selflessness? Yet another prison for him to rot away in, this time with a cellmate who was the complete and utter embodiment of hatred and chaos itself. And what was she doing to help free him from that prison? Nothing, just as Bill had accused them all of. She was doing nothing to rescue her brother from his horrendous situation, just as she had done nothing to rescue him seven years ago. The truth of it was she was failing him in every sense of the word. Because as much as she wanted to help him, she didn’t even know where to start at all. She didn’t know how to break that massive stone wall keeping him locked away down. She didn’t know how to kick the vicious demon he was currently sharing his body with out. She didn’t know how to bring him home once and for all, to get him to finally stay with her, to convince him that they were still a family, no matter how many times they were torn apart.
She didn’t know how to help him; which meant that the only thing she could do instead of try was what she had always done: keep reaching out for a hand that never seemed to reach back.
He could feel it.
Day in and day out, it pounded heavily against the back of the half of his mind he still had some semblance of control over. It coaxed him, begged him to open that door, to let the floodgates go down, to let that rich, endless power now afforded to him just flow through him completely unfettered. To just let go, to end his pointless vigil and let himself finally be free to do whatever he could possibly imagine. The power tugged on his very soul, it seemed, hounding at him to be used, demanding to at least let the other, much more wild and malicious half of his consciousness use it if he wasn’t going to.
It absolutely terrified him.
Mostly because it was something that Bill had absolutely no qualms about taunting him with almost constantly as they shared their prison that was his body, which was trapped inside an even larger prison that was the Kindergarten. Fortunately, whatever half of him that was now the demon negated his former need for food, water, or even sleep because the Kindergarten itself was completely desolate and devoid of all signs of life except for him. Even then, he barely felt alive as he sat in once spot, in one of the larger holes in the hollowed out walls he had claimed as his own moments after locking himself away. And there he stated, largely unmoving as he resumed the very same stance of waiting for nothing that he had grown so used to during his first bout of captivity. Only now, he didn’t expect to be saved; in all honesty, he didn’t want to be saved. Because if he was saved, then so was Bill. And all at once, everything he had thrown his life away from would be worth nothing at all.
Still, even if he had managed to subdue the demon physically, that didn’t mean keeping him bound mentally was anything close to a simple task. Every second of every day was a struggle for control, one that he only narrowly managed to maintain the upper hand in. Bill would try almost ceaselessly to escape his ridiculously determined vessel only for Dipper to somehow reign him back in every single time. It didn’t take long for the demon to grow desperate, and as he did, so too did his tactics. Even though he had little to no control over their shared body, his still had a potent presence inside their mind, the connection between their consciousnesses being more than enough for him to get his messages across. In his most petty fits of rage, Bill would often press nightmare after nightmare upon Dipper, filling them with the most unspeakable horrors both imaginable and unimaginable, things that would have easily and utterly broken the average human mind upon so much as a first glance. But what the demon underestimated was that he was dealing with a mind that had already been broken by years of untold horrors all their own. And in its place stood a wall of indifference and determination so strong and sturdy that even a being as powerful as Bill himself was having a hard time putting a dent in it.
But that didn’t mean he didn’t stop trying. Because even if he knew Dipper held little struggle against him, Bill could tell that he was struggling with the immense power they both had access to, though Dipper even moreso now because of his well-maintained control. And while it infuriated the demon to no end that a mere human child was in a better position to use his powers than even he was, Bill knew he could use this struggle to his advantage.
“When are you just gonna give up already, kid?” he asked, their voices still intertwined as they echoed through the otherwise dense silence of the Kindergarten in an almost ethereal way. “We both know you wanna use it, so why don’t you? It’d be a way better use of your time than just sitting around here doing nothing all day.”
“I think you know exactly why I’m not going to use it,” he replied coldly, evenly, just as he always did whenever the demon attempted this, which was very often. “Because if I did, then you’d probably be set free. Which is not something I’m about to let happen now, or ever.”
“Geez, well sorry for asking, ‘Mr. Warden’. I just couldn’t help but notice that its calling to you a bit… stronger than usual… You really sure you don’t wanna answer that call? It’d be pretty disappointed if you just left it hanging, you know.”
“I don’t care. I’m not using it. I don’t need it. Now could you just be quiet for a change instead of trying to wear me down, which isn’t working by the way. I’m trying to concentrate.”
“Aw, what’s the matter, Pine Tree? Thinkin’ about poor little Shooting Star again? You sure tend to do that a lot, even though I don’t get why. Honestly, if I were you, I’d be angry at her instead of worried about her like you are. Especially since her life should have been yours.”
He flinched at this, his eyes widening somewhat as his brow furrowed in confusion. “W-what do you mean?”
“What, you mean you can’t see it? Oh, that’s right, you won’t let yourself use any of my-or should I say--our powers for some stupid reason. Well if you did, then you’d be able to take a glimpse at any number of alternate realities that split off of our own. And I’m not lying to you when I tell you there’s one where Shooting Star was captured that night instead of you. You wanna take a quick peek?”
His heart sank at the very idea of any reality where Mabel went through even half of the pain he had endured. After all, he had been hurt so deeply and so profoundly in so many different ways that he wouldn’t wish that kind of anguish upon anyone. Except for Bill maybe. Especially since the demon didn’t seem to care about his already quite loud internal protest against this. “Too late! Here ya go, Pine Tree! Enjoy what could have been!”
Dipper gasped as his mind was abruptly whisked away into the dreamscape, allowing him to watch as an inactive observer as an entirely different version of his life played out before him. All at once there he was back on that fateful night seven years ago, where any chance he once had at living a normal life had died right along with his freedom. And yet, instead of the Earth loyalists nabbing him and taking off, they managed to get ahold of Mabel instead. Dipper felt a bitter chill run through him as he watched his younger self reach out for his abducted sister as she disappeared into the night, presumably never to be seen again. A year past, one that he spent in worry as Stan and Ford searched high and low, all the Gems of Crystal Falls lending their aid to try and find Mabel but they never did. Dipper begged, pleaded against his uncles as they finally called off all their search efforts, knowing that any hope of getting her back again was incredibly slim. Yet over time, he began to accept that painful truth as well, as much as it hurt his heart in every conceivable way to think that he’d never see his sister again. And so, as a way of bracing himself against that pain, he forced himself to move on, to keep on living his life, because certainly, that’s what Mabel would have wanted.
And so he did. He watched with wonder as his childhood played out in a much better way than it actually had. He lived in warmth, comfort, and peace with Stan and Ford, their care for him immense as they both knew he could have been lost just as easily as Mabel had been. Never once did he want for anything; he was always well fed, well bathed, well rested, and well loved. Stan taught him how to fight while Ford brought him up with all of the scientific knowledge he had in his arsenal. He craved knowledge, thrived in it, sought every opportunity available to him to learn more just to satisfy his curious nature. His days were spent in free, cheerful exploration, Steven often at his side as they ran through the streets and woods of Crystal Falls, building friendships with most of the Gems who lived there and uncovering the mysteries that lay beyond its limits. In time, Lapis showed up to Crystal Falls, just as eager to learn as he was and together in their pursuit of knowledge, they were unstoppable. And they years went by in their quiet way, unfettered in their peacefulness and bliss as he lived his life, embracing every second of it and reveling in the amazingness of the complex, yet beautiful world all around him. A world that he had never gotten to see much of with his own eyes as they had been blinded so long ago. A world that he could have had just as much as Mabel did. A world that he wanted, that he felt robbed of, that he should have had and why didn’t he? Why had he been the one who had been taken away? Why had he been the one who suffered through so much senseless torture? Why had his life been stolen away from him before it had even really begun?
And most of all, why couldn’t he do anything to change it?
But he could… The tug at the back of his mind reminded him. He could change it if he really wanted to. He could bend time, warp it to his favor, make the clock reverse to the point that he could actually have the peaceful, coveted life that had just played out before him. He had that power now, it was all his. And accessing it would be as easy as simply opening up that door and letting it all flow in.
As he considered opening that door for the first time, somewhere, on the other half of his consciousness, Bill Cipher laughed triumphantly, knowing that it would only be a matter of time before his impressionable young vessel caved completely. And then, there would be no one who could stop him.
The Kindergarten’s implosion could be heard and seen all across Crystal Falls, even as far as the abandoned ship near the lake. The moment they all realized what it was, Stan and Ford had already started setting off, the Crystal Gems hurrying not too far behind. And though she had been ordered to stay behind at the ship with Pacifica and Steven, Mabel refused to simply wait by while her brother suffered any longer. Which was why she raced after them, running across town without a single stop, all the way to the ruined remains of the Kindergarten. And the sight she found there was more than enough to make her blood run completely cold.
There he was, floating high above Stan, Ford, and the Gems trying to stop him, his entire body aglow with blue flames as he let out a dark, malicious laugh. Gone was all the calm control Dipper had had when he had sealed them both away, for though it had taken him months, Bill had finally gotten the control he had been so fervently vying for. Already the demon had taken some of his anger out on his vessel for his lengthy imprisonment, if his bloody nose and chest were any indication, but even so his manner was wild and unrestrained as he rained his vengeance down upon those below without a single sign of hesitance or restraint, triumphantly taunting them all the while.
For a moment, the most Mabel could do was watch all this chaos unfold from her distant vantage point, tears streaming down her cheeks as she felt all sense of waning hope fade away. She knew that Dipper had fought for so hard and for so long to keep Bill at bay, more than likely putting himself through endless amounts of anguish and agony every step of the way. But in the end, his fierce, courageous struggle still hadn’t been enough. In the end, the demon had still won, he was still having his long awaited revenge, he was still poised to destroy her entire family, Dipper included.
And after years of doing nothing, that was something that Mabel was not about to let happen.
“Hey!” she shouted, boldly rushing forward into the fray. The moment they realized she was there, Stan and Ford tried everything they could to hold her back, but she pushed past her uncles this time, running right up to her possessed brother, glaring up at him with all of the ferocity and righteous fury she could muster. “Get out of him already, Bill! Now!”
“Well, well…” Bipper began with an intrigued grin as he drifted down a bit, Bill still clearly in control as his yellow eye flashed twistedly. “Look who we have here… Glad to see you could make it, Shooting Star! I was thinking I was missing one out of the set, but nope! Guess the family’s all here, finally together again! Isn’t it just sweet?”
“Shut up!” Mabel growled, her hands curled into tight fists at her sides. “I don’t know how you beat Dipper back and broke out but that doesn’t matter, because you’re going to get out of his body and leave all of us alone!”
“Oh yeah?” he asked challengingly. “And what makes you think that? What makes you think I’m not just gonna burn you and your stupid uncles to a crisp before doing the same thing to the rest of this worthless planet?”
“I know you’re not gonna do that because somewhere in that body, Dipper’s still there, I know it,” she retorted, her manner still brazen and resolved. “And I know he would never do that.”
“Ha!” he laughed mockingly at this claim. “Then clearly you don’t know your own brother that well, kid. He just spent the last several months trying his best to resist using our immense cosmic power, and you wanna know the only reason he finally gave in? So he could take your happy little life away from you so he could have it instead while you’d be tortured and imprisoned for years on end just like he was! You call that selfless? Or noble? Or heroic? Cause I sure don’t!”
Mabel’s determination finally shaken away into shock upon hearing this, her eyes widening as she tried to make sense of what she had just heard. “W-wha… n-no! That… that’s not true! H-he wouldn’t… you… you’re lying!”
“You wish I was, kid,” he scoffed coldly. “But go ahead and tell her, Pine Tree! Tell her all about how you were ready and willing to roll back time and flip your fates around! I’m sure she’d love to hear about how much you don’t care about her!” A gasp escaped him, tears starting to well up in his eyes as his other half was finally allowed some control. Guilt was written all over his expression as he looked down at her, telling her all that she needed to know that the demon had, against all odds, been telling the truth. “M-Mabel… I… I didn’t… I was just… I never wanted you to-” He let out a sharp cry of anguish as control was viciously ripped away from him again, his remorse turning into a smug grin. “See, Shooting Star? He can’t even bring himself to deny it because it’s true! He was gonna throw you under the bus just so he could take everything you’ve ever known and loved for himself! Some brother he turned out to be, huh?”
Mabel said nothing for a moment, a few tears finally escaping her as she thought about just how horrible it all was. It was true: Dipper really had wanted to swap their fates around, to put himself in her peaceful place while she took his own horrific one. He had gone through so much agony in his life that she couldn’t even begin to imagine going through all of that herself, much less somehow surviving it like he had. And yet… for as terrible as this truth was… she still couldn’t find it in her to be angry at him like Bill clearly wanted her to be. She couldn’t be, no matter how hard she tried, because when it came right down to it, he had every single right to feel that way. He had been beaten, blinded, abandoned, brutalized, and yet in the end, in that deciding moment when he had been given a chance to exact his revenge against the family that had wronged him, he hadn’t. Instead, he had turned the tables, trapping both himself and Bill away and remaining strong in his vigil for as long as he had been able to hold out. He had saved them all, even when he really hadn’t been obligated to, even when he could have saved himself so much more easily. And in Mabel’s eyes, that selfless, sacrificial act far outweighed whatever small, overall insignificant moment of selfishness that had led him here.
“D-Dipper… I… You… W-what happened to you was… it was so unfair…” Mabel began waveringly, desperation in her eyes as she looked up at him tearfully, hoping that her brother could hear her beyond the demon controlling his body. “I haven’t stopped thinking about how unfair it all was from the minute we first found you in that cell… Pretty much every day I ask myself why all this happened to you instead of me. B-because if I could have, then I definitely would have swapped places with you in a heartbeat. You didn’t deserve what you went through. You were just a kid, we both were. Heck, we still are. And its so wrong that you’re the one who has to keep going through all these terrible things because… b-because of me… So… if you wanted to switch our lives around, or, heck, even if you wanted to just get rid of me altogether… t-then… then I’d understand that… Because you deserve so much better than what you got… You always have… and you always will…”
Bipper scoffed haughtily at this attempt at an appeal, his eyes rolling as he began buffering it off. “Oh give me a break, Shooting Star. Like any of your schmaltzy apologies are actually gonna-” He suddenly trailed off, his tears returning as sadden sincerity filled his expression. “M-Mabel, no… I… I never… I don’t want to change things around like that… I thought I did, b-but… but I was wrong… It’s true, my life has pretty much been… well, the worst, but I’d never, ever wish any of that on you… I just… I… The only thing I want is for all of this to finally end…”
“And it can,” Mabel smiled warmly, reaching her hand out to him once more. “You’re stronger than Bill is, Dipper, I know you are. You held out for so long now that you’re practically a pro at handling crazy murderous demons! And you wanna know why I know that? Because you’re my brother; and fighting back and being totally awesome is something that runs in our family, whether you like it or not.”
He let out a small, genuine laugh at this, and Mabel felt her heart begin to soar as, for the first time in years, he began to reach his hand back to meet hers. Yet before they could connect, it was stopped once again, this time by his other hand as a fierce struggle for control again. “N-no! Don’t listen to her! I’m not about to let a bunch of sentimental family garbage ruin everything I’ve worked so hard for!” His other half resisted fiercely though, pulling past this restraint as he continued reaching out for Mabel, his hope finally returning to him after years and years of it being gone. “Well I’m not about to let you or anything else keep me away from my sister anymore! So face it, Bill. This is over. And you’ve lost!”
And with that, their hands finally connected, years and years of separation and grief ending in one moment of sheer love and triumph. The demon let out a wild screech of defeat as suddenly, without any warning of all, he was shoved straight out of his longtime vessel, back into his triangular form as he shot back into the open air. As Stan, Ford, and the Gems hurried after Bill and eventually forced him to retreat, the blue glow surrounding Dipper faded, his shared power gone as his eyes closed and he collapsed right into Mabel’s arms. She held onto him tightly, mostly out of fear that he’d be taken from her again if she ever let him go, as he trembled uncontrollably, his body and mind both in shock over just how much it had been through over the past few seemingly endless months. But even so, she was there for him, rubbing a hand over his back gently in an attempt to soothe him as she whispered gentle reassurances to him all the while.
“It’s ok, bro-bro,” she said softly, ignoring everything else going on around her as she reserved her attention solely for him. “Everything’s gonna be alright… it’s over now… You’re safe… you’re free… And that’s exactly how you’re gonna be from here on out… I promise…”
Dipper said nothing in response to any of this, mostly because his mind was still struggling to pull its ruined parts together again as it recovered from Bill’s incredibly toxic presence within it. But even so, he showed his appreciation for her comfort by slowly, shakily lifting his arms to return her embrace as he buried his face into her shoulder, knowing that this was perhaps the first time in seven years that he truly felt like he was no longer alone.
And even though tears were still running down her cheeks through it all, Mabel couldn’t help but smile, joy unlike any she had ever experienced before flooding her every sense. Because for the first time in seven years, through pain and scars and grief and guilt and everything else, he had reached out to her once more. Even if time couldn’t take back any of the things that had kept them apart in the past, they were finally together again.
And for both of the Pines twins, this was more than enough.
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niennavalier · 3 years
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OC Ramble Pt 3!
Alright, this is gonna be my last OC post for now (unless I feel like unleashing the D&D character creation hell onto the internet) (which is a possibility but idk, cause I actually can't include all of them anyway). Just gonna do a little bit of a talk about my other ship, which I tend to call my City Boys, because a suggestion from a friend stuck. Also a few of the characters connected to their story. Which I will talk about... someday. Also the world for this. Which isn't fully fleshed out yet, aside from being sorta... medieval/renaissance vibes? (I clearly know history). But essentially kinda how fantasy vibes work, just minus magic. But the whole story has been centered around the one city that they're both from, which has really strict economical divides and such.
But okay, gonna start typing on the boys, here we go, hopefully won't be writing too much here (it's late and I'm sleepy).
Alaric Hastings: Mid-20s ish, born into a noble and really traditionally minded, old school type family (the really haughty, uptight sorts - basically just huge dicks, to be concise). But it's not the kind of life he likes - big social gatherings and keeping up appearances and having to present yourself in a certain way just to maintain your family's pride. He's very much an introvert, gets anxious and nervous really easily in these sorts of situations, and has never really had a way to deal with it? (He got basically thrown into the deep end with this sorta stuff at a young age and isn't naturally a people person. Which didn't really get him any friends that could make this all easier, and it's just amplified by his parents being super uptight, even compared to other nobles. It's all a big mess, really). When his parents find out he's gay, that goes as well as you'd expect and he ends up disowned.
(tbh if you check my other posts, he's the one that I posted the song for. The idea of male!Elsa lives in my head rent-free and made it into this character)
Then there's y'know, plot stuff that I'm too tired to get into. But in general, he's real warm-hearted and gentle - lots of very soft vibes here. (even if that's coupled with self-esteem issues and such). (Although he's also the type of person who will really latch onto something as a way to cope, whether healthy or not? AKA alcoholism is uh... a thing. But hey, this is what plot is for - to address things).
Random fun fact: he's actually one of few males characters I have who doesn't fit into that super pretty aesthetic? He's more conventionally handsome, although he himself doesn't really care much about his looks. Which is a nice lead in to...
Silas Reyes: The other half of this pairing! He comes from the poorer part of the city (but a much better family environment. He didn't know his dad but his mom is wonderful) (Actually, cause I did come up with some story stuff for his parents, his dad is also a noble, but from a much nicer family, and has some big idiot golden retriever energy). But he's the charismatic people-person of the two. Without getting too far into the worldbuilding, he basically worked his way up into this crime syndicate of sorts, and ended up becoming their negotiator and face, so to speak. He's just good at reading people and understanding what they want, and he knows how to sort of dance around those desires and play whatever part he needs to, so long as it gets whatever outcome he wants. Which is the more sinister side of what he's capable of, but he's just really adaptable when it comes to social stuff. Outside of that, though, when he's able to take off all those masks, he's genuine and... I guess blunt? He'll say what he thinks, albeit in a way that still comes off as friendly and ribbing and generally warm, not cold (though he does have a somewhat sharper way of speaking, especially compared to Alaric. It's sorta hard to just explain without examples though).
Him and Alaric meet under...not so great circumstances - lying is involved at the early stages - but, again, plot and development and etc etc.
And as for why there was that attempt at a transition up above: he cares a lot about how he looks. Presentation and stuff. It's important to him that he looks put together, especially in the presence of other people (ie. people he's not super close with). Especially his hair? He's particular about it and puts a lot of time into it (because it was actually an early part of his character design IRL. I had an idea, and said idea had me actually looking up stuff like medieval techniques to dye hair).
Emerson: Again, no last names, but she's one of Silas' friends. Two ish years younger that him, hardcore insists that everyone calls her Em. She's got this big and exuberant personality. Very talkative and just a bit dramatic (more than a bit). She loves being involved in all the goings-ons and has been known to basically be the local rumor mill. That whole nosy side is really on display when she's with Silas and Bennett (who I'll talk about a bit down below). She loves knowing what their plans are, especially when it comes to their love lives (she's very invested in all of that. When she first met Alaric, she shipped the two of them from the start and was more or less determined to make sure they worked out their issues). She's panromantic and ace, and so when the boys talk more on the sex side of all of this, her opinion is the "okay I'm glad you two enjoy this but also why? Aren't there better parts to talk about?"
Bennett: Alright, I mentioned him above and frankly, I don't have him fully figured out - just some bits and pieces I wrote to get an idea of his voice. But he's the other one of Silas' friends, and of the trio, the sorta more serious one. He's much more grounded (no-nonsense seems a little too harsh, so I'll go with grounded) and gives off this air of just knowing how to deal with situations. He's much more of a listener than his two friends, but also naturally intuitive (especially when it comes to reading Silas. The two of them met as teenagers, so there's a lot of unspoken stuff that he can read. They didn't meet Emerson for another handful of years, at which point she just sidled up to them and became part of the group). But also, all of that can go out the window when he's with the two of them - especially Emerson. They'll just bicker and banter with each other constantly over whatever weird topic of conversation someone brought up.
Side Notes: Yes, most of these characters are attached to Silas, but to be fair, Alaric's parents are huge assholes and I've just not cared enough to flesh them out. They suck and that's all that matters for now - whatever excuse they think they have for not accepting their kid is dickish and dumb (to be fair, I do have their reasons in mind, and yeah, bad parenting). Also, I do have another character in the works who's connected to Alaric's backstory - a brief, past love interest that he meets again later. But I don't have a lot of ideas for how that all goes, so I haven't experimented hugely with his character (although I do have a name I like!) And other last thing: I do have Silas' parents worked out a bit - Delia Reyes and Alonso Oriol - and have actually written down how they meet (it's incredibly stupid and fitting). I just didn't feel like going into them too much here? Maybe I will later idk; his dad is a riot (big dumb idiot who just adopts people).
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