#and reframes a lot of the book
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SO true
#les mis#victor hugo#learning about Hugo's war crimes really does completely shatter your perspective of him#and reframes a lot of the book#im making this as a joke meme but yeah it was Awful#I'm not sure if Pilf or someones already made a post explaining it for tumblr?#the basic context is that Hugo was on 'the wrong side' of the Barricades in 1848#working with Napoleon III's regime to violently crush a (justified) working class rebellion against the regime's new draconian labor laws#edit: I got it wrong it was in the interim regime between Philippe and Napoleon iii — not Napoleon iii’s official reign yet#he killed a lot of people (even when he couldve saved lives with diplomacy)#in large part because he was also suicidal at the time#and yeah the more context ya get the worse it looks#yeah his politics changed drastically later on but like. Yike#like he later became very pro barricade and anti Napoleons but. yee#maybe part of why his writing on Javert is good is because he has experience committing atrocities for an unjust authority#:P
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degendering stuff esp tasks seems like a logical thing to do but i only recently discovered i could intentionally RE-gender stuff i do to make it more fun. so that is my breakthrough lately
#like i think despite my best efforts i couldnt shake the idea that i am somehow living the life i was expected to - housewifery#because of disability the majority of the helpful things i CAN do for my family are house tasks and i think the fact id been drilled to#consider those tasks my Feminine Destiny my whole life was making those tasks a lot more miserable than they needed to be#but they dont need to be either feminine or Null....they can be butch stuff i do butchly if i want :)#reframing the stuff i can do as useful solid dependable -> butchness has been good for my psyche in ways i was Not Expecting#turns out gender IS real its just mine wasnt initially on the menu#birdenest#scraps book#queer
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My new book! It came out a couple of days ago and someone left me a five star review! (My first review!!) If you like fated mates and second chance romance, then check it out!
#fated mates romance#spicy reads#shifter romance#werewolf shifter book#alpha asshole#sort of#he's an ass and he's endearing#at least I think so#and lia is a lot more badass than she thinks she is#they both just need a bit of reframing#some forced proximity will help them with that
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i wanna talk about this portrayal of sally jackson and how it feels notably younger than the 2010 movie or even the musical. obviously her age is never explicitly stated there or in the books, but mama was sitting on the fire escape in the rain listening to olivia rodrigo and thinking about her ex. she's giving big 30-something millennial energy and i think that's so important in the context of HER story as a young mother alone in the world just trying her best. i think percy paints her as this angelic, caring, gentle presence that can do no wrong but the pov shift in the show lets us see her rougher edges, the places where she wasn't always perfect. and maybe im reading too far into this but if you reframe her and percy's relationship within the context of her being that young, of them reaching this quasi-gillmore girls space of "you are my baby but you're also my best friend and all i have in this world" idk it just feels a lot deeper somehow, like they're giving sally more dimension and development earlier on and i'm so excited to see her arc progress in future seasons
#im rambling#but as someone who had a teen mom and read those books when i was 12 and my mom was 30#i had a MUCH different relationship with her than my friends had with their moms#pjo#percy jackson#percy jackon and the olympians
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every time I bring myself to read a "classic" I become more certain part of their notoriety has to do with content control and the long-lived habit of hate reading plus a dash of using reading (and the thickness of books) to play at superiority.
#to preface this a bit#i live in the caribbean#the only classic by white standards we were made to read was shakespeare#all else were stories more relevant to our history and experiences#so my standards are also skewed#because our books are heavy on jokes that shouldn't be funny#old hurts reframed#a lot of things that make you cry either then or later when you understand#and they're short in comparison
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I’m thinking about perfectionism again, specifically with respect to how it can skew your opinion of success and failure.
There’s this concept that comes up a lot when you read about issues like perfectionism: all-or-nothing thinking. It’s a trap that’s easy to fall into.
If you’re a fic writer falling into this trap, you might feel like you’re an absolute failure if your fic isn’t a 100% accurate depiction of the scene you see in your head with flawless grammar and zero typos. That is a, quite literally, impossible standard to meet and as a result of never meeting it, you probably feel one or more of the following:
lack of motivation
certainty that there’s no point in even trying
self-hatred or some other form of intense dissatisfaction with yourself and/or your skills
This is a completely logical way to feel in that mindset, by the way. Your standard for success is so high that you’re constantly a failure. If your standard for success is impossible to meet, then there is no point in trying. If there’s no point in trying, how could you possibly feel motivated?
In order to move away from those feelings, you need to move away from that all-or-nothing, black & white mindset.
One way to do this is by figuring out a new standard for success that actually can be achieved. For example, give yourself permission to have occasional typos in your stories. Gaiman’s Law states that an author will always find a typo the first time they open their published book. If even Neil himself has resigned himself to this fate, then hopefully you can too. If you managed to write your story then that’s a success and finding a typo after you’re done doesn’t turn that success into a failure.
Another thing that’s helped me is to think of every failure or mistake or dissatisfying result as a learning opportunity. If I’m not able to do something now, that doesn’t mean I won’t be able to do it at some point in the future. I just need to keep trying. Practice makes better. Practice also helps you figure out the things that are easy for you and the bits that are hard and where you might need some help - either from a fellow fan or from another kind of resource.
I think part of the reason why people can get so anxious about their fanworks is because we care so much about them. We love the characters. We love the world. We want to do them justice in our writing, and we want other fans to love our creations too.
It’s important to remember that all of us love imperfect things all the time. It’s not perfection that makes a thing lovable. It’s the heart that’s put into it.
There’s a lot of fear behind perfectionism. Fear of being caught doing something wrong. Fear of being shamed for a mistake. Fear that imperfection makes us unworthy or unlovable. Fear that a single flaw will ruin an entire work. Fear of failure.
If you want to be able to move through that fear, you need to be able to reduce it somehow. The most effective way that I’ve found is to stop writing with the goal of posting something online. Write for the sake of writing, without the pressure of showing it to someone else. That might help you to get out a first draft (or second or third) without that worry about being judged and found wanting.
If you’re not ready for positive self-talk or reframing the internal narrative (I get it. Been there.) then allowing yourself to be less than perfect in a place where no one else can see you might be a good first step.
And just because I think it’s important that you hear it from time to time: you are a wonderful, creative, amazing human being - mistakes included.
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You know what I want to see, I want to see more of Steve, Eddie, and Robin being 1980s small town kids from Indiana, by which I mean;
Robin is The Source of Gay Knowledge purely because her parents host Hippie Christmas and she managed to sneak away to find a neat bookstore in Indiana once.
Her knowledge is not in depth. It's patchy, woven together through rumors, stories she heard or things she picked up from her parents' old pictures. She's got a handful of zines, one book, and some movies she managed to order for Family Video behind Keith's back.
She acts like she's Queen of the Queers because in Hawkins she pretty much is.
(Max and El ask her what a lavender marriage is once, something they overheard snooping around.
Robin confidentially answers that it's code for when one woman dresses up as a man, fooling officials into wedding two woman.
She does not live this down two years later when they find out what it actually means.)
Eddie doesn't spend every weekend in Indianapolis.
Gas is expensive, his busiest days of his "job" is Friday and Saturday, and he has no fucking clue what the hanky code is.
He's wearing that bandana because Metallica front singer James Hetfield has one on all their tour posters.
Eddie does make it down to a gay bar though, by accident. Rick needed some back up for a shady deal. Promised Eddie a boatload of free drugs to sell if he agreed to just stand there and look mean.
He was warned the bar they were meeting in was 'weird' and to not 'freak out' --which Eddie thought was hilarious given his nickname and general appearance, but whatever.
He doesn't understand when they get there, because it's just a bunch of hot men with hanky's in their back pockets everywhere.
Then he sees two women kissing and it clicks.
He can't out himself in front of Rick, but one of the bartenders playfully dresses him down for his own hanky, letting him know all about the code and teasing him through his embarrassment.
He's got an offer to come back and learn what color and which pocket his hanky should actually be in, a prospect Eddie was salivating at until Chrissy Cunningham up and died on his ceiling.
(He still wore the hanky, because the feeling of that bartender tugging it out and stuffing it back in might be the closest thing he's ever had to sex and he absolutely wants a repeat.
He's young and horny, sue him.)
Steve Harrington may not be academically smart but he's not dumb.
He figured out a while back that the basketball team as a unit probably crossed the queer line more than once--or at least it did before Hargrove came in.
( Brad Handly for example, went around slamming kids into lockers and screaming slurs like a fucking movie villain one Monday because the varsity team got dead drunk at Laura's party on Sunday and hey, look, there weren't that many girls there, okay?
They all had fucking hands and mouths. Everybody but Tommy was single and hot to trot. Nothing gay about it.
Its not even like they were kissing or treating each other like chicks. It was just Brad's first time and they got to tease him later for overthinking it.
Dude graduated soon enough after and given Steve was on the team as a sophomore, he hadn't thought about the guy and why he might be freaking out so bad in years.)
Robin's entire panic attack at Starcourt, and a few more after had Steve replaying that whole incident. Reframed it a bit, and, yeah.
In retrospect that had been extremely gay, actually.
It sat with him a lot easier than he'd thought it would. Partially because of Robin, but mostly because that's just who he was.
Stranger things had happened to Steve and this one didn't want to kill, maim or otherwise eat him, so it got filed under 'interesting facts he should never tell his parents if he wanted to keep his trust fund' and then he went about his day.
(Or he tried too, anyways.
It caught up to him when Eddie and Robin somehow figured out the other was queer and dragged him along to some bar Eddie had a standing invitation at, with demands for Steve to do what he did best.
Babysit.
Their magical trip was utterly destroyed when Brad Handly happened to be the very same bartender who had given Eddie the invite.
Considering Brad's immediate bark of laughter followed by a hug and introducing himself as "Steve's gay awakening", Steve ended up having to speedrun through Eddie and Robin both having a crisis for him.
It didn't help that Steve had politely, and laughingly, corrected Brad with a casual;
"Pretty sure that was Tommy man, but if it helps I think that tongue of yours gave Matt Burdon a crisis."
--which ended up with him answering a lot more gay sex questions with Brad than he cared too.
At least he, through Brad, was able to help Robin connect to some local lesbians and--after a second crisis from Eddie regarding how Steve managed to have more sex than "the resident town freak and guy who actually knew he was gay, Steve!"-- even helped Eddie out by catching the metalheads tongue with his mouth later that evening.
The last one landed him a boyfriend, trust fund be damned.)
#this started as thought and ended as a mini fic#filing this under shit I'm not expanding on#steddie#platonic stobin#its the “Eddie and Robin drag Steve to a Gay Bar” trope but with a twist#the twist is that Steve skipped his gay crisis entirely#and also that basketball team is not straight#steve harrington#eddie munson#robin buckley#I just want to re-invoke that pre internet feeling of "No one has an easy way to google whether or not their friend is right#so it comes down to who sounds right LOL#or whose known for what
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Betts. how do I stop feeling jealous of everyone and everything and just focus on myself? I'm tired of being comprised of nothing but envy.
story time:
so i was recently at Millay, which is one of the top artist residencies in the country. they have an acceptance rate of something like 3%. when i was shown my room, there was a packet of all the residents' artist bios. i sat down and read through all of them. most of them were like half a page in length, single-spaced, listing out accomplishments i could never dream of. one artist had won a guggenheim. one author had published 12 books. another author published her first book at 19 years old. these were people who were extremely well accomplished and respected in their fields.
and we all became very good friends!
and then there was me. my bio was 3 sentences listing out a couple short publications and awards and other residencies i'd done. and my honest to god first thought was, "wow, the jurors must have really liked my writing to have accepted me among all these great artists."
and my second thought was, "that's the healthiest thing i have ever thought."
i had no jealousy of their accomplishments. even though my career hadn't even begun compared to theirs, i didn't attend dinner that night with any impostor syndrome. and that confirmed for me that i had grown out of whatever place i used to be in as a person, where i was basically a raw wound wrapped in barbed wire. everything hurt me and i hurt everything in return.
jealous feelings come from an intense need of external approval, but as i've mentioned in other asks, approval and validation is a well that gets filled over time. at our introductory dinner that night, i didn't talk about my work in the hope of convincing everyone i deserved to be there, which was what i would've done a few years before. instead we all ended up talking about a TV show. the most highbrow place i've ever been in my life, and we're getting wine drunk and discussing at length a cheesy discovery channel reality series. the guggenheim winner: loves box turtles. the guy who's published 12 books: his favorite movie is Spirited Away. the girl who published a book at 19: reads One Direction fanfic. the well-lauded poet: old school tumblrina.
actually, 4 out of 7 of us read fanfic and we had some great conversations about it. sometime i'll tell you about introducing the co-director of the residency to AO3.
when you think of the most accomplished and successful writer you've ever read, remember that they are, at the very core of their being, a nerd. and if you were to eat dinner with them, you would, with enough polite inquisitiveness, be able to unlock the goofy side of them that binges Property Brothers.
so that was the big change for me, i think. i started asking a lot of questions. i stopped talking and i started listening. it seems counterintuitive that admitting to not knowing stuff shows confidence, but it does. pretending you know stuff is what looks insecure. i think for me, i put so much of myself in my work, i wanted my work to be lauded so i could feel accomplished, and feeling accomplishment would let me believe i deserved to exist. but over time, i've reframed that mentality. my work is a thing that exists beyond me and is private to those who read it. it comes from me, but it is not me. what i am is just the person i am, and my life is a series of moments i choose for myself, and i am allowed to exist.
even sending this ask shows that you've begun filling your well. it takes someone who's already come a long way to realize jealousy isn't the status quo and is a feeling to be overcome. and you can overcome it. you can reach a place where you have enough success that other people's success has nothing to do with you, and you're free to just be happy for them. and when you read work that's better than yours you feel joy at learning something new.
so put your work into the world and let it be rejected. you'll rack up a couple wins or close calls, and those will give you energy to be rejected some more. and eventually you'll be rejected so much that rejection doesn't feel like anything, and you will have won enough to realize your work has a place in the world, and that place is no bigger or smaller than anyone else's. your work is allowed to exist simply as it is, and you are allowed to exist simply as you are.
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How the narrative framed Mace Windu, back in 2002
So there's this 2002 book written by Marcus Hearn, edited by J.W. Rinzler, titled Attack of the Clones - The Illustrated Companion. It was released a month before Episode II was released.
AKA, before EU material and anti-Jedi fanon could publicly reframe the meanings of the film... and before more recent narratives could reinterpret the character of Mace as a robotic, protocol-worshipping stickler who never bends the rules (when evidence shows he's anything but).
So how does Marcus Hearn - "untainted" by all the above factors, armed only with the Prequel films and their screenplays - frame the character of Mace Windu?
MACE & ANAKIN
Fandom: "Mace hated Anakin from Day #1 and never trusted him. Mace was probably jealous as he always thought he was the Chosen One, not Anakin!"
Attack of the Clones' - The Illustrated Companion:
"Jedi Masters Yoda and Mace Windu lead the High Council in rejecting Qui-Gon's application to train Anakin, 'He is too old,' concludes Mace Windu. 'There is already too much anger in him.'
Hearn explains that the problem with Anakin wasn't that he was just too old, it's that because of that age he had become too filled with fear and anger to a point where taking on the Jedi training would be twice as hard for him as it already was for everyone else.
Hearn doesn't chastise Mace for this initial decision. On the contrary, he adds more context to it by using a line from the screenplay to explain where Mace is coming from.
He also goes further into Mace's view of Anakin throughout the book:
"[Mace] over-estimates Anakin Skywalker, paying little credence to Obi-Wan's protestations that the boy is too confused and disturbed to be dispatched on a solo mission."
"The Jedi Council is aware of Anakin's exceptional skills, and Mace
Windu believes Anakin may fulfill the prophecy that says a being will one day bring balance to the Force. But Anakin still has a lot to learn…"
He's basically stating that Mace believes in Anakin, but that doing so is a mistake. Which, to be fair, considering how things turn out for Mace and the Jedi... is kinda true!
Mace's problem with Anakin is almost the opposite of what most of the fandom projects onto him.
It's not that he dislikes Anakin, on the contrary, he holds Anakin in too high of an esteem and is overlooking Anakin's glaring flaws because "hey, Anakin's the Chosen One. He's got this!"
That's not the only flaw Mace has, according to Hearn.
MACE'S (and the Jedi's) ONLY REAL FLAW
Fandom: "Mace and the Jedi had become too emotionally detached, they had lost touch with the common folk by spending too much time in their ivory tower. They focused so much on being selfless that they forgot how to care, they've become a bunch of elitist, righteous sticklers for protocol who care more about upholding laws than actually helping the people those laws are meant to protect!"
Attack of the Clones' - The Illustrated Companion:
"Although he is a senior member of the Jedi Council, little in Mace Windu's experience has prepared him for the looming threats of the dark side of the Force and Count Dooku's Separatists."
"Mace Windu's faith in the Jedi to protect the Republic is admirable, but it also blinds him to the true scale of the growing menace. He is aware that the dark side is growing, but still allows himself to be too easily reassured about the Separatists' ambitions. [...] Mace fatally misjudges Count Dooku, refusing to believe he could be behind any attempt on Senator Amidala's life. 'Dooku was once a ledi, he tells Padmé. 'He couldn't assassinate anyone. It's not in his character.'"
"Mace Windu's strengths are, in many ways, qualities shared by the Jedi Order as a whole - he is an accomplished diplomat and a fine swordsman. Such skills have served the Jedi well in their role as the galaxy's peacekeepers for a thousand generations. But such skills are not enough to save the Jedi from their own complacency, and the tumultuous changes that threaten to wipe them out forever."
Hearn perfectly grasps what the Jedi's only real flaw is, in George Lucas' intended narrative: they were unprepared, complacent, they were blind... and now they're stuck playing catch-up.
But when he's saying that, he's not blaming them for it. Because this flaw doesn't derive from some sense of elitism or superiority... it is an inevitable consequence of their qualities.
They've managed to stay out of politics as neutral diplomats...
... but that makes them vulnerable to the Sith's plot, which primarily takes place within the political arena, where they have no control or experience.
They are painfully aware of the corruption in the Senate...
... but as a result, they're too quick to trust the Separatist's talking points as well-meaning and genuine, instead of seeing the movement for what it really is: greedy big business trying to become the government.
They trust and agree with Dooku, believe in what he publicly stands for (after all this man used to be one of the wisest and kindest members of the Jedi Order, Mace's friend, Yoda's Padawan, etc)...
... but as such, they are blind to his true nature, that of a treacherous Sith who'd stoop to orchestrating assassinations.
The Jedi have their guard up, knowing that there's another Sith Lord still out there, orchestrating in the shadows...
... but they can't really find him, because the Dark Side has clouded everything, so only darksiders are able to sense the possibilities of the future! Them serving the good side is screwing them over, in this situation.
Flaws such as being too trusting or being unprepared, letting your guard down because you've established a 1000-year-peace, are flaws that kind, noble characters such as the Jedi are bound to have.
They may be flaws, but they aren't faults. And considering the way he describes Mace and the Jedi, it's clear Hearn grasps the nuance.
MACE'S RELUCTANCE TO JOIN THE WAR
Fandom: The Jedi joined the war out of arrogance, they thought they could swashbuckle their way through the problem and win, instead they didn't realize that they lost the very moment they joined.
Attack of the Clones' - The Illustrated Companion:
"Mace Windu believes in the Jedi as keepers of the peace - not as soldiers - but there comes a point when he reluctantly realizes that it is time to take affairs out of the realm of diplomacy."
Mace and the Jedi didn't want to start a war. If you read the script for Attack of the Clones, Mace and Bail keep grasping at straws to not engage with the Separatists up til the very end.
But when you consider that...
the Geonosians are about to execute Obi-Wan without a trial,
and the Separatists leaders have been unmasked as a coalition of unscrupulous corporate assholes who are willing to plunge the galaxy in chaos just to make more money.
... at some point, the Jedi have to come to terms with the fact that Separatist leadership (and Sidious) won't accept diplomacy because they want a conflict. A conflict will make them all richer. And the Republic, well, they're just dying to go to war too.
So the Jedi go save Obi-Wan and capture Dooku, hoping that in doing so, the conflict ends before it begins. They succeed in the former goal... but fail the latter one.
The Clone War has begun.
From there on, the Jedi are drafted to lead the war. Which is why - as Hearn points out - Mace was so reluctant to take action in the first place. The Jedi are ambassadors, they are not built for war... and now they've been forced into one.
Mace is by no means a perfect character... but he's someone doing his best. Just like Obi-Wan, just like Yoda, and all the other Jedi.
Overtime, Windu's character has been dumbed down to either "that one angry black man" or "the dogmatic emotionless dick who hated Anakin"... and I really think that that's not what we were meant to see him as.
The way Marcus Hearn (who also wrote The Cinema of George Lucas) refers to him is a much more charitable interpretation of how others (ahem Filoni ahem) do, nowadays.
#Mace Windu#mace windu appreciation#long post#jedi order#anakin skywalker#meta#in defense of the jedi#star wars#master windu#samuel l jackson#attack of the clones#aotc#star wars prequels#flashing gif#very long post
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I see a lot of people talking about Crowley using his plants as a reframing device for his trauma and negative self-image, but nobody’s talking about Aziraphale doing something similar with his books. He loves rare first editions and bizarre misprints -- books that many people wouldn’t be interested in outside of that niche of collectors. Books that are “incorrect” or “wrong” because they break the mould or go outside of the status quo or breach people’s expectations.
Because he himself has fallen short of the expectations of his heavenly peers time and time again, and is acutely aware that they think he is “wrong” for being that way.
Perhaps he keeps the bookshop stuffed to the brim with misfit books and is always hunting for more because he sees himself somewhere in them. He likes them for being different and recognizes himself in how they are outcast for being that way. So he chooses to surround himself with them, not only to remind himself that there is no such thing as “perfection” but also to remind himself that it is possible for a misfit to be loved and to belong. It’s like his own little fortress of misfits where he can be comfortable being himself.
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Book Carmilla vs Adaptations (SPOILERS)
Here are a few 'interesting' adaptations. I like some of them for their own merits, but mostly dislike them as Carmilla adaptations for the below reasons, with some notable exceptions:
Vampyr: The Dream of Allan Gray (1932 film): The first Carmilla inspired movie, although it keeps almost NOTHING from the novella except 'female vampire'. In this case, a creepy old lady rather than a charming young lesbian. This is a really moody, slow, acid trip of a film though, a treat for fans of vintage vampire film. (3/10)
Hammer Karnstein Trilogy: The Vampire Lovers is the gayest and most book-accurate. Carmilla still kisses/seduces men before killing them, boo. The second one her identically-named reincarnation is blonde and has sex with / falls in love with a man booooooo. She's not in the third one at all. It's all very 70's and nowhere near queer enough, but at least we got the incomparable Ingrid Pitt in the first movie. 5/10.
Vampire Hunter D: Bloodlust: 'Carmilla' shows up as a surprise third act villain. She's an elegant and imposing vampire queen with a castle called "Cjethe" and the Vampire King offed her previously for being A Bit Too Extra. She's... Bathory. She's Elizabeth Bathory, right down to the name of her historical castle, the elaborate gowns and the blood-bathing. Bathory in Castlevania Nocturne even looks a lot like this one. Cool scary vampire lady, but Carmilla In Name Only. 4/10
Castlevania (Games): She's fine here, but mostly just kind of a big Dracula groupie like most of the other non-Dracula vampires. Often depicting as a flying skull or mask crying bloody tears, with optional succubus-like figure reclining on top of it. Cool.
Rondo of Blood has her appear together with a ninja vampire Laura with bunny ears because why the hell not. 6/10
Castlevania (Netflix show): Baddass, angry Karen. She's amazing in the first season when she's scheming against Dracula, but after that she just sort of sits on her butt sipping wine and griping about men for a whole season until Isaac storms her castle. A cool character but not a great Carmilla, because Carmilla for me is defined by how much she loves women, not how much she hates men. Still amazing voice work by Jaime Murray though and her last stand was insanely baddass. 7/10
Carmilla Web Series / Movie: My favorite adaptation. It's obviously playing waaaay fast and loose with the canon and reframing her as a charming antihero in a zany urban fantasy, but there's deep current of love for the source material, especially in the movie. Natasha Negovanlis has charisma off the charts and the Hollstein romance is adorable. This Carmilla might be a black-leather-wearing snarky millenial goth with a Canadian accent, but as the show goes on it peels back layer after layer of the romantic, poetic, wistful, world-weary immortal hinted at by the novella. This show redeems LeFanu's lovelorn villain in all the best ways. 10/10.
2019 movie / Styria movie: I still haven't seen these, have heard good things about the gothic cinematography on the most recent one but not good things about the rest of it. The trailer looked moody and pretty though, I may watch it at some point.
#carmilla weekly#carmilla#carmilla karnstein#sheridan le fanu#carmilla castlevania#carmilla of styria
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I've noticed something very interesting about the structure of The Locked Tomb series recently, in that it is a series that is immeasurably more than the sum of its parts. Not that that's an uncommon thing for serialized media, it's literally the point of the format to tell a deeper story as a whole than is told in any one installment, but I think tlt is a particularly extreme example.
Like, gtn is the only book in the series that works at all as a standalone story. In most series, if you skip a book, you'll be confused about specifics and backstories and what have you, but you'll probably be able to follow along and get the gist of the theming, even if you miss some details and subtleties.
With this series, though, the subsequent books (especially HtN but also NtN) are essentially incomprehensible if you've skipped the previous books. They don't follow a predictable trajectory from the previous books that can be back-extrapolated from their stand alone contents. Like, genuinely try to imagine what you would think the previous books must have been about if you just read Nona. Imagine what you'd think the themes were. It's completely out of wack.
This is because each new book in the series isn't just a continuation of the previous books - it is in dialogue with the previous books. Each new book is a commentary on what came before, a reinterpretation that forces you to rethink or even reread the previous books with a different perspective that draws more layers of meaning to the surface. It makes the series feel like a knot that you're slowly unpicking - each new thread that is revealed to you changes how you perceive the weave of the previous threads.
I fucking love this. It makes the series incredibly rereadable, and it rewards spending a lot of time contemplating and theorizing about what you've read, which is excellent because the books are written in such a way that they invite you to ask questions without giving you answers. It make you feel ecstatic when you achieve a new level of understanding of a story you had thought you already understood.
There's a drawback to this, though, in that it makes the first read-through of a new book in the series the worst read-through. Again, HtN is infamous for this, verging on incomprehensible on a first pass but bristling with rich meaning and evocative prose on a second, but it's a trait that applies to all three books released so far. On a first read, lacking the context of the later series, GtN's story feels straightforward, sometimes juvenile, full of relatively simple but evocative characters, and burdened with what seems to be needlessly obtuse and obscure worldbuilding that only exists to slow down the reader's attempts to solve the murder mystery and to act as a backdrop to be cut through by Gideon's harshly modern and irreverent quips. (Sidenote, but as much as that is a thing that a lot of the fandom really enjoys, I know a few people who found that choice extremely jarring and unpleasant. It is a polarizing structural choice, it just doesn't seem like it because people who don't like it don't often stick with the series long enough to get invested in the deeper themes and plot of the series).
NtN too follows this format, although we don't yet have the added context of it's sequel, so a lot of what it has to say remains maddeningly out of reach. It certainly enriches rereads of the previous books, though; a lot of people have gone into great detail about how Nona's perspective on Kiriona reframes our perception of Gideon as a narrator. And John's accounting of the end of the world and the Resurrection adds so many more layers to all the interactions we witness in HtN.
It's just a very unique way to build a story, to start with something fairly simple and self-contained and then spend the next two books layering more and more meaning on those events. For me, it's not the characters (much as I love them) but the structure of the series that keeps me so fucking obsessed with these books.
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Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes Movie: first response
⚠️SPOILERS⚠️
Okay so! There’s QUITE a few changes from the books. The funerals, which I read the book I always found so unsettling, were cut. Honestly, I was worried if I’d be able to stomach watching it on screen so honestly, those being excluded was a bit of a blessing. But, it’s not really clear if Didi and Apollo died in the attack on the Arena or not. The only confirmed mentor death is Felix, who has been upgraded from the president’s nephew to the president’s son!
The biggest change though, which after listening to the recording from the soundtrack I enjoy a lot, is how Lucy Gray wins her games. Rather than the snakes being released mid way through her games, the snakes are what ends her game. Dr.Gaul spirals, claiming that there doesn’t need to be a Victor and the districts MUST pay, especially because now the president’s son is dead because of these ‘rebels’. Lucy Gray poisons one of the tributes from Coral’s alliance, who’s name escapes me at the moment. I think it’s the one she’s kills with the snake. Lucy Gray’s (Rachel Zegler’s) performance in this scene is so powerful. It’s amazing. The way it’s reframed that she’s singing as the snakes shroud her and she’s the only one alive in the arena, is just chilling. Dr.Gaul refusing to end the games and Snow pleading for her to let Lucy Gray go, with the students chanting “Let her go. Let her go.” I’ve been a Rachel fan since the start. Since I was 12, I’ve been subscribed to her YouTube channel, and seeing the movie and her in it is so… AHHHH. This scene was just so powerful and I honestly still am not over it and can’t wait to see it again on my second viewing.
Reaper’s death also changed with this! He is killed with the snakes along with Coral and I believe two other tributes. Clemmie, sadly, is gone from the movie after the incident with the snakes. She also takes a much more like… not antagonistic per day, but cocky role. Reaper’s death was… it was good. His reaction to Wovey’a death being what triggers him creating the grave for the other tributes is amazing, and the performance of that grief and anger was so good.
The movie portrays the mercy of the games so well. Lucky Flickerman is HILARIOUS as a host which is so disturbing. “The odds are not likely but may they be in your favor” is what he says to Lucy Gray after her interview. His quips are funny and quick, and honestly a highlight of the movie. Only to be reminded of the dying children of course. It’s very Ceaser Flickerman and it’s amazing. After Lamina kills Marcus, Lucky even says “was it mercy or murder?”. It’s such a sharp contrast to Lamina and Marcus’ interaction. She gently reaches for his head, and he turns, face clenched with pain and sorrow, saying “please.” You can see how gentle Lamina is as she kills him, the music too really adds onto the tragedy of it. How Lamina, who is seen as weak and a cry baby for most of her screen time, offers such mercy. Lamina’s actress says nothing, but her performance is so beautiful.
The movie highlights on Lucy Gray’s grief and guilt too. When her and Snow reunite, she talks about how they are BOTH killers. She expresses such grief at how Dill (‘ill Dill’ and ‘Tuberculosis on legs’ WERE WILD ON LUCKY’s part) was the one who found the poison and the audience gets to see a lot of her live reactions to the game’s events.
THE LAST SONG OF LUCY GRAY
The way Rachel and Tom play the scene in the cabin is WILD. The movie’s tone SHIFTS so much the second Snow finds the guns. It becomes like a horror movie as Lucy Gray asks what is it and snow turns to her pointing the gun slightly at her, finger almost on the trigger ready to pull. Rachel’s performance of Lucy Gray in this scene is something I’ll be talking about for days. She’s a bit of a schemer, she is suspicious, and she knows what will come next. She tests the waters with him and when she says that besides the guns, she’ll be his only loose end, I can’t tell if Lucy Gray does it to taunt or test him.
SNOW. “Lucy gray. are you… are you trying to kill me? AFTER EVERYTHING I DID FOR YOU?” Something about the way Snow says this… it takes you out of context of the story because this is something that happens often in toxic relationships. It’s so real and raw, and honestly a little too close to reality than we would like. I personally see it as an effort on the writer’s part to make sure the audience doesn’t side with snow at the end. As we know, the Yassification of characters and if a bad person is attractive it’s okay yada yada IS such a discourse. Tom Blyth as Snow has been seeing a lot of this too. But this part? This part makes it a bit more real, which is greatly appreciated.
Everything about the last scene with Snowbaird was fantastic. The two people I went with said that they were honestly confused on who betrayed who. And who stopped trusting who first. And that’s what makes it so fun AHHH.
I have so many thoughts but not enough people to talk about it with, so word vomit on tumblr lol. I’ll prob have even more to say after round two! (My friend got to meet the cast today and I’m so jealous that I wasn’t able to go)
#ballad of songbirds and snakes#coriolanus snow#lucy gray baird#snowbaird#reaper#wovey#rachel zegler#tom blyth#suzanne collins#i have so much to say ahhh#hunter schafer#she was so good#the perfect Tigriss#tigris snow#OH and snow asking is this real#real or not real#everlark parallel#I’m still sad they didn’t include the scene where Sejanus and Snow get bread from the MELLARK Bakery.#like lol I’m 65 years im gonna put your grandson through so much abuse
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Can you make a post going over Serano's theory and the parts of it you don't agree with and why? I'd be interested in your perspective
I kind of have in the past if you dig for it. I think I'd reframe or rework a lot of it now though. I'm also not super interested in fully rehashing it in full at the moment because I'm reaching a point of burnout, but I'll talk about the easy surface level stuff.
My issues with Serano's theories have very little to do with the things she's explicitly written about transmisogyny and trans womanhood in terms of systemic transmisogyny and what that looks like* and it has moreso to do with the way she makes assumptions about the "opposite" experiences trans men "have".
"Have" is in quotes there because reading The Whipping Girl as a trans man it becomes very obvious that - at the time of writing - Serano had little to no interaction with trans men besides maybe two primary sources. Most of what she specifically says about trans male experiences in the book is conjecture and assumptions being made based on how Cis Binary Patriarchy works for cis binary people (when... trans people don't actually fit into Cis Binary Patriarchy on a systemic level, ever).
She opens The Whipping Girl by stating that she will be focusing on transmisogyny and trans womanhood and not focusing on other trans experiences, but she doesn't really actually do that though!!!! I wish she had!! It would have made her work significantly stronger because she had very real important things to say that do hold up and are real and that do matter!!!
However, instead whenever trans men come up, The Whipping Girl makes baseless comparisons that essentially go:
"Trans women experience [ a very real example of systemic transmisogyny ] AND AS SUCH trans men experience the opposite [ insert universalized experiences of one or two trans men that doesn't get examined at all and is given absolutely no nuance and the lack of nuance can be explained away by saying "well she did say she's only writing about trans women, why should she give examining trans men's experiences that much attention" ]".
She could have just stopped and not spoken about trans men at all and retained the scope she initially set for herself at the beginning of the book or she should have more directly acknowledged that her scope was limited and left a door open for others to step in - like she has since done and stated should be done.
It's very frustrating talking about the flaws and blindspots in her work - that she herself currently directly acknowledges - only to be met with "Well you just don't understand her!! You're trying to say she's wrong and that transmisogyny doesn't exist" because... that's not what's being said. That's not the conversation that's being had.
Transmisogyny does exist, but we can talk about it, Patriarchy, and trans oppression in better, more robust ways. That's what Intersectional theory is all about.
*I do take issue with the Whiteness and Binaryness of the way she writes about trans womanhood though. Especially because I think it's very clear that her theory is also heavily impacted by her background as a White biologist. She hasn't done any deconstruction of biology/sexology as racist, intersexist institutions and leaves little room for genuine intersectional thought in her supposedly intersectional theory. I think in many ways Serano is another White Feminist that's appropriated Intersectionality without examining her own Whiteness despite Intersectional theory having direct roots in Black Feminism BUT we can have that conversation after people start treating her like a human being, yk?
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I had to reframe what success looked like and reframe what I want to be known for.
Of course I have wanted the validation that a lot of us seek as writers. The checklist of, “you’re in the New Yorker,” “you’re a bestseller,” all of the things. What if none of that happens? Is the work still valid? Am I nothing if I feel like nobody’s read this book? How do I find a way to channel my own grief of this experience, and alchemize it into something else that’s actually transformative and interesting to me? I get to see the fruits of my labor, and actually people being shifted by it in real time. And that just is so much more significant to me than getting the pat in the back that I’ve longed for from this industry.
Writer and multidisciplinary artist Fariha Róisín on asking yourself what kind of artist you want to be – The Creative Independent
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I know ppl downplay certain siblings trauma a lot but let me just reframe everyone’s for you based on the seasons
1) imagine the person you love the most sending you 185828282 miles away for 4 years to live on the moon. Completely alone. When you get back you find out that all the samples you put so much work into didn’t even get read or taken out. The person who sent you there tells you later that he put you there to guard the most precious thing in the universe but you can't help but think that he sent you up there because you died and came back looking like a monster. He left you on the operating table for two months and when he saw you again he couldn't even look at you.
Imagine being a little kid and being told you’re not special. And then living with 6 other people who are constantly praised because they’re more special than everyone else. Imagine them 30 years later still talking about you behind your back and blaming you for everything that went wrong.
Imagine being 12 and being so restless to see the world and to see what you can do that you go somewhere no one’s ever been. And it’s hell. And no one comes to save you. You think about how you saw your family dead in those first days. And it haunts you for those next 45 years.
2) imagine being transported back in time. You have powers that can kill people. And since you’re from the future you have history books on your side. You have the power to stop one of the most famous assassinations in history and prove to your dad (who’s alive now) that you’re GOOD. That you’re not the impulsive emotional crazy mess he always said you were. You just want him to love you, because whether you want to admit it or not, you want his love and validation more than anything else in the world. You don’t prevent the assassination.
Imagine having to witness all the stupid things your brother does. You just want to give up sometimes but you literally can’t. So you put up with his attitude and stupid justifications and you never get to hug those 5 other people that you miss so much. Your brother says that ghosts can’t time travel. You don't get to say goodbye to him. Even though you hated him sometimes he had a good heart and you miss that good heart all the time.
3) imagine going through brutal racism and dehumanization every single day. Not knowing if your husband is alive or in jail or not. Constantly on alert. Your husband is the only thing keeping you from losing it. And the thought that your daughter will be there when you get back. You didn’t get to see her before the first apocalypse. You failed her as a mother and she died that night not even hearing your voice. Your brother was on the phone for you. You leave your husband for her. It’s the hardest thing you’ve ever done. Except she isn’t there.
4) (speculation) you used to be immortal. You got really sick one time from walking barefoot in a field and from something you smoked. You got shot by a spear gun. You came back. You can drink however much you want. You can get run over by a bus and you heal in half an hour. Now that you don’t have your powers it’s different. Everything is terrifying on a new level. Salmonella from the canteloupe and liver poisoning from the alcohol and flu from your brother's new kid. The clorox wipes smell like a security blanke and you can't get close to anyone anymore. Not even your sister. Not even your niece. And it makes your brother sad. You don’t smoke anymore and you’re so, so quiet. No one notices. You’re finally quiet.
#the umbrella academy#see if you can guess who!!!#but oh my god this made me so sad jesus christ#tua#luther hargreeves#diego hargreeves#allison hargreeves#klaus hargreeves#ben hargreeves#number five#viktor hargreeves#didnt include lila here sry#writing#kai's writing
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