#and no one can stop me | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

jacks347 · 23 days

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(As I continue to chip away at my next few projects, I figured y'all should see the original. Enjoy alternate ending Matador Gothic, my pride and joy. Oh, and the very end has symbolism explanation for those who want that extra knife twist)

“Step into the sun. How does it feel?” Alfonso felt like he was walking on air. Scythus was dead, his love was safe, he could breathe again. Everything was going to be okay. The woman he’d come to love took his hand and stepped into the sunlight next to him.

Then she winced.

His heart dropped.

“Bad. I-It feels like burning.” She dropped his hand and stepped back into the shade, rubbing the quickly blistering burns on her skin with a hiss of pain.

No. No no no no no. It wasn’t supposed to be like this. This was supposed to have saved her. She was supposed to be fine. Why was she not fine.

“No no no, y-you’re joking.” He laughed, mainly out of rising hysteria. “This was supposed to work! You were supposed to be okay! I’m not supposed to lose you!!” His knees gave out from under him, crumpling to the ground. Alfonso could feel his heart shattering, splintering in his chest and stabbing at his lungs with every breath.

Delilah reached out to comfort him but snatched her hand back before it crossed into the sunlight. “Alfonso, my love…” She trailed off, unable to find the words to comfort him. This was it. All their work had been for nothing. She would fall into that dream like Carmen said and he’d kill her.

I just wanted to go on vacation…

“What am I supposed to do without you, poppy? I risked everything for this!” Delilah could barely watch as he tore his hands through his hair, gripping it so tight she was worried he’d rip it out. “Alfonso please, i-it’s-” “Do not tell me it’s okay! Nothing about this is okay!” He snapped, his eyes wild and full of righteous fire. “Do you not remember what Carmen said? If I can’t save you, then the Guild deal falls through and I get an execution squad sent after me! I can’t fail here!”

Right. The deal with the Guild. Delilah had forgotten about that in the rush of the final battle. It was either they both lived or they both died, no in between. “What can we do? W-What am I supposed to do? I can’t be a vampire!” Delilah tried to tamp down her panic, actively failing considering the high-strung pitch bleeding into her voice.

Alfonso staggered to his feet, stepping back into the shade to pull Delilah into his arms. “Don’t you worry, poppy. I’ll figure this out. We’ll figure this out. We’re in this together, right?” He could feel her take a shuddering breath before relaxing into him. “Right. We’re in this together.”

Delilah was acting weird. She had been for the past few days. She hadn’t been talking as much, seeming more contemplative, and had been growing more and more unenthusiastic about this venture away from the city and into the wild countryside to avoid the Guild. In his mind, Alfonso knew why. He knew exactly why his love wasn’t the same but his heart refused to acknowledge it. He was going to fix this, he was going to save Delilah and they would be happy together. He would have his happy ending. He deserved it dammit.

“Alfonso.”

There it was again, that soft, tired tone that she’d taken on. When he’d first heard it, it had only stoked the fire in him to keep going, that if he worked hard enough he’d break her of it. But now it was like a cold shower, dousing the fire and raising his frustration.

“Poppy, I’m trying to focus here.”

“Alfonso, please.”

“Delilah, let me do this.”

“Alfonso Villalba.”

He finally stopped and turned towards Delilah, his heart falling to pieces all over again as he saw the worn-out expression on her face. How long had she looked so tired? So sad? “We can’t keep running. I know that, you know that, this is just delaying the inevitable.”

How could she say that? After all he’d done for her? All he’d given up, all he’d risked? And now she just wanted to give up? No, he couldn’t accept that. “Poppy, that’s not true. We’ll find a way, just like we have through everything else. I’ll figure this out, I promised you that-" "Alfonso, enough. There is no other way. You should know that better than anyone.” “That’s not true, there’s still the route that Carmen suggested when we started this.” “That was a hypothesis at best and would take months to get, you know that! We don’t have months. We barely have days. Alfonso, this is it. I’ll fall into the dream or whatever it is and you’ll-” “Don’t you dare finish that sentence.” His voice was a harsh growl, unable to even think about what she was implying.

Delilah stepped back, fear flashing in her eyes that crushed his soul. He never wanted to scare her, he never wanted to see that terrified expression like he had when he first saved her from Scythus again. Yet here he was causing it. “Wait, Delilah, I’m sorry-” “No, no. This is the problem I’m talking about.” “Problem? What do you mean problem? The problem I’m seeing is that we’re not moving so we can-” “Alfonso I swear if you don’t shut up and let me finish for once, I’m pushing you off this cliff.” Alfonso’s mouth snapped shut with an audible click. Delilah sighed, rubbing her temples for a second like she was trying to jostle her thoughts together.

“The problem is you. This tunnel vision on a pipe dream that we both know isn’t possible. You’ve made yourself blind to everything around you. You want this to end the way you want so bad that you’ve forgotten about reality. We’re out of time. We’ve tried everything we could and it hasn’t worked. There is no happy ending. The change will fully take hold within a couple of days and then what. You’ve buried your head so far in the sand that you haven’t seen what’s right in front of you. Food is disgusting, I haven’t slept, I can’t even think about sunlight without my skin itching, I’m not me anymore! I’m becoming a monster and there’s nothing I can do to stop it!” Delilah threw her head in her hands, taking a few shaky breaths. Alfonso could hear her quiet sniffles and choked back sobs, wanting to reach out and comfort her but knowing he couldn’t. What could he say? What could he do? There was nothing.

She pulled herself together, scrubbing her face of any lone tears, and looked up at him, forcing him to make eye contact with her and see the soul-crushing pain she was in. “I can’t do this, Alfonso. We both know I won’t survive it. So please, please keep that in mind when I tell you this.” “Tell me what? Delilah, what did you do?” “I…I called Carmen. She knows where we are. She told the Guild. The executioners are after us.” “You did what?! Delilah, qué demonios, have you lost your mind??” “Actually, it’s because I haven’t lost my mind that I called her. A decision needs to be made, Alfonso. And if anyone should make it, it’s me.”

“The way I see it, there are three outcomes here and only one where someone comes out of this alive. One, the Guild catches up to us and kills us both. Me because I’m a lost cause and you because, well, that’s what they were hired for. Two, we run and I turn into a vampire. I kill you out of hunger and then get hunted down by either the Guild or another vampire. Either way, we’re both dead. Or three, you kill me here and now before they get here and run, giving yourself a fighting chance to survive. That’s it. There are no other options.” It was true. It was reasonable. And Alfonso knew that. But his heart still didn’t want to admit to it, didn’t want to admit that there was no way out with his love coming with him.

“Delilah, poppy, I-I can’t do this. I can’t, I won’t.” “So you’d rather the execution squad do it instead? I’m sure they’ll be a lot less merciful.” She raised an eyebrow at him, making him grit his teeth in frustration. Why wouldn’t she listen? “That’s not the point!” “Yes, it is! That’s the entire point! Alfonso, you’ve been calling the shots this entire trip. And for good reason too. But just this once, can’t I?” Delilah stepped forward, taking his hands into her own and forcing him to look at her. “Please. You gave Erica a choice, you made her death peaceful. The executioners won’t have the same level of care as you. I know what I’m asking of you and I know it’s an impossible thing to do but I’m still going to ask. If I have to go, the least I can do is make it on my terms. Won’t you let me have that?”

He hated this. He hated this. Why did everything he cared about get taken from him? Why couldn’t he have this one thing? He didn’t even realize he was crying until he felt Delilah’s hands brush at his cheeks. “I don’t want to lose you.” His voice was small and watery, almost broken. “Not like I’ve lost everything else. I just wanted this one thing to myself. Why couldn’t the universe just let me have this?” His cracking facade broke and the floodgates opened, collapsing into Delilah’s arms as sobs ripped from his chest. Alfonso knew it would come to this eventually but he had hoped, prayed, begged of the cosmos that it wouldn’t be this soon. He held her in a vice grip like she’d disappear if he didn’t hold on tight enough, burying his face in her shoulder.

Alfonso could feel her hands in his hair, combing through it and smoothing down his curls in that gentle way she did, could hear her soft voice trying to comfort him over the sound of his muffled sobs, could smell her lingering perfume clinging to her clothes. This was what he was going to lose. And he’d rather be struck down where he stood than let someone else give her anything but the most gentle way out. She was right. If there really was no way out, the least he could do was fulfill her final request for her. He pulled his head out of her neck to look into her eyes. “I’ll do it.” His voice was still weak but still confident and sure. And the relief that passed over her face was like warm honey to his soul. “Oh thank you thank you thank you, I know this is an impossible request but I just…don’t want it to be some clinical afterthought. I know you’ll take care of me.” “Of course I will poppy. Anything.” He gave her one last squeeze, memorizing everything about her that he could before stepping back. “Now, try and get comfortable. I know that’s a little hard out here but we can try.”

After a few minutes, Delilah was set up on her knees on his cape that she’d folded to give some padding. Alfonso was sure she noticed the way his hands were shaking as he drew his pistol. It was the same motions he’d done a hundred times before but this time felt so much heavier. He wasn’t sure if he should laugh or cry at the way she smiled as he lifted the pistol to fire. “I’ll never forget you, my poppy.” “I sure hope not, not after all this.” “I-I love you.” “I love you too, Alfonso. Always and forever.” The last thing he saw was her beautiful face before he squeezed his eyes shut and pulled the trigger.

His heart fell to the ground with a thud in time with her body. He didn’t want to open his eyes. If he opened them, it’d be real. He’d have to admit that he couldn’t save her and he was forced to do the thing he’d hoped he’d never have to do since the beginning. But he had to get moving. Delilah had given him the chance to go, to live on, to carry her memory with him, he had to take it before it was too-

“Stop! Drop your weapon!”

Late. He was too late. Once again. And now he’d pay the price for it. He opened his eyes to find himself surrounded by some of the Guild’s best and brightest, dressed all in black like the elements of death they were.

Alfonso dropped his pistol, lifting his hands to show he was no threat. “Go ahead. Kill me. I’m not going to fight you on it.” The squad seemed a little taken aback by his compliance but said nothing. The leader stepped over Delilah’s body, pressing the barrel of his gun to Alfonso’s forehead. “Any last words, Alfonso?”

Alfonso could only chuckle, tilting his head up to the stars as far as the executioner would allow. “Espérame, mi amapola. Así que no tenemos que estar solos al otro lado.”

He wouldn’t be able to carry on her memory, to take the second chance he’d given her, to live his life the way she would’ve wanted him to. The least he could do was make sure she wasn’t lonely in the great beyond.

“May you find the peace you fought for so valiantly in the next life, Alfonso Villalba.”

With a click and a bang, it was all over. A tragic, bloody ending to an equally tragic, bloody story with only one remaining to tell it.

If anyone ever asked Carmen what her most treasured memory was, she’d smile sadly before saying one thing.

“Let me tell you the story of the Matador Gothic.”

(And because I'm both cruel and unusual, here's the symbolism for those of you who want that extra bit of pain. I named her Delilah because Alfonso is Catholic and in the Bible there's the story of Samson, one of God's strongest soldiers, who got tricked into giving up his power by a woman named Delilah. Alfonso gave up everything to be with his love. I chose the nickname Poppy because poppies, according to the language of flowers, mean eternal sleep and oblivion. A tasty lil morsel of tragic foreshadowing.

Go check out my Ao3 for more unrelenting sadness)

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