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#amazon is bullshit
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Perfect Rings of Power review.
Damn, wish I had written it.
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coopsgirl · 2 years
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It just keeps getting worse for the Rings of Power. Here are some cast member/producer statements regarding the show.
She (the chick playing Disa) explained, “It’s their time and it’s so important and I hope many people will see this fantasy and be able to relate to it. This is a reflection of the world we live in, there are many and we are different and we will embrace and discover, and peel back, and learn, and educate, and be educated.”
This show should not reflect our world; it should reflect Tolkien's world. People also have not had a problem relating to it which is why it's one of the best selling fiction works in history. Is this show going to be preachy ("educate and be educated")? People generally don't like being preached at/talked down to and I can't see this going over well.
These cast statements echo what Executive Producer of the series Lindsey Weber told Vanity Fair back in February, “It felt only natural to us that an adaptation of Tolkien’s work would reflect what the world actually looks like.”
It seems to me that the only natural thing to do was to reflect Tolkien's world if you are doing a Tolkien adaptation. Make no mistake, this will not be an adaptation. They will not be telling his story with his characters (there was no warrior Galadriel, Miriel was never queen or queen regent, and they have more original characters listed so far than actual Tolkien characters and that alone is a huge red flag). It will be a veneer of Tolkien so thin that if you barely scratch it, it will disappear.
This is going to be very expensive fan fiction written/produced by people who don't actually seem to be fans. I love fan fic. I write it and read it. I like AUs, modern AUs, smut fics, and other things that vary quite a bit from Tolkien's stories and characters. It's cool to have fun with it and sometimes do crazy things. But, when someone buys the rights to actually use the real thing, I expect a proper adaptation. That doesn't mean you can't take some liberties and make some changes so that the material works better for film/tv, but it should not be so different as to be unrecognizable in character/theme/storyline.
If you watch this as a generic fantasy show, you might enjoy it. I'm not impressed by anything so far. The costumes/props mostly look cheap and like they came from Party City (seriously some of the helmets/armor/crowns look plastic), the elves just look like regular people with pointy ears, and the "not hobbits" (yes, Harfoots are hobbits!) look like they rolled around in dirt/trash and then decided to go on about their day.
One last thing, do you know what the show is supposed to be about based on any of the trailers that have been released? It's called The Rings of Power yet there has been no mention of rings or of their creation. Obviously as Tolkien fans, we have a general idea of what they might cover but you can't tell that from the promotional material alone. If I didn't know anything about Tolkien, I would think this is a world that had been at war, the war is now over and some people think it will be a time of peace and others think more conflict is on the horizon. Also a meteor lands somewhere. I can't work up any excitement for a such a bland, generic plot.
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Rings of Power
Characters: who the absolute hell is Halbrand? And Nori? Who the heck is the stranger? HOW IS THIS EVEN CLOSE TO BEING CANON?! Why does Celebrimbor look like a rip-off Bilbo ngl. And the dwarf woman whatever her name is DOESN'T HAVE A BEARD-
Hair: just- just no. Wtf is the hair? ELVES HAVE LONG HAIR NOT 90S HAIR STYLES. Amazon used 1 billion whatever the currency is for this and they couldn't even be bothered to make good wigs? What the hell?
Time stuff: bruh everybody knows that the forging of the rings weren't at the same time as the fall of numenor! Also, like where was Annatar when all this was happening? (Yh, ik Halbrand is sauron, but no.)
Script writing: it's written like it was made by a three year old who can't use a dictionary. Gil-galad: hope is never mere even when it is meagre. Wait what?! Meagre legit means mere but ok-
Costumes: oh crap. The armour looks like plastic, no effort was put into it. Don't even get me started on the rest
Other: since when did Tar-Miriel get blinded?
That's not the most of it. It's awful.
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I’m not f*cking w/ this company at all this holiday season..
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sallyb-sin · 2 years
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AMAZON is a horrible business. They never delivered my package and now I'm out $40 because they basically said f*ck you and your hard-earned money that you're losing. This is the last time I ever order from them.
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flitsy · 2 months
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He is having a time.
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snow-in-the-desert · 7 months
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so just to be clear Tumblr is now trying to be twitter unironically. Twitter is being held hostage by a narcissistic billionaire who is trying to rebrand itself as an incel haven. TikTok is... I don't even want to know tbh that app is about as close to a black mirror episode as we've ever gotten irl. Deviant Art supports AI. Adobe supports AI. Imprnt currently won't pay it's artists. Redbubble pays artists practically nothing. All streaming services won't pay their writers and actors shit but hey let's start putting ads in the middle of whatever show you're watching even though you already pay a fee for the service. InstagramFacebookThreads doesn't bear mentioning, they're all spammy and horrible.
The state of the internet in 2023 is truly abominable. Hoard your media while you can folks it's not getting any better from here on out
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elvencantation · 5 months
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i feel like i get literal psychic damage when i think about capitalism too long
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jenna-louise-jamie · 18 days
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alex rider + text posts part 3
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serenfloras · 5 months
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i watched 3D2Y and the line of rayleigh saying luffy still had six months of training stuck with me
so
luffy deciding to become a better captain and train his haki with a crew that is full of haki masters
what i am saying is temporary kuja pirate luffy vibing with the girls and learning to see from the perspective of those under him
hancock teaching him some of her fighting moves and how to kick real hard and he teaches the girls how to punch even harder
snakeman as a homage to his besties from amazon lily as he applies all he was taught
boa "strength is beauty" hancock: luffy you are very cute this is not me being down bad its just a fact. lets weaponize it
luffy getting some snake aesthetics. he still has a hoodie with the kuja jolly roger
them hiding luffy from the government right under their nose and holding back from chuckling like schoolgirls anytime a marine complained about "straw hat luffy being nowhere to be found" while the man in question raids the perfume yuda's kitchen for the seventh time now and no one suspects shit
just
kuja pirate luffy!!!
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the-writing-warg · 2 years
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“But do not despise the lore that has come down from distant years; for oft it may chance that old wives keep in memory word of things that once were needful for the wise to know.” - Celeborn to Boromir, Farewell to Lorien, Fellowship of the Ring
Celeborn straight up told amazon to respect the original books and the people who love them so they ignored his existence
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*A COUPLE SPOILERS*
My 2 cents on Amazon LOTR: Rings of Power:
I was prepared to hate the #RingsOfPower but the 1st episode was so meh I kept checking to see how much longer before it was over. I didn't dislike it for the reasons I thought I would - its so far removed from Tolkien's work that I was able to judge it as a standalone show. Meh.
Super boring. I'm glad I watched, now I don't have to watch any more. I don't care who the meteor guy is. I don't care about any of the characters. So ho-hum.
Arondir looking like a full meal was a bonus.
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Gil-Galad would have been the perfect elf (albeit a wee bit thick and chunky) if he had less banal dialog or had delivered it with less gravitas. Or just kept silent and stood there looking fine.
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The Harfoots need a bath and a good scrubbing, and a hair brush. They look like they smell like unwashed ass and have head lice.
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Galadriel and Elronds vibe together is creepy as fuck. Pardon me, sir, but you're supposed to be her son-in-law one day.
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Celebrimbor's old ass looking the hot mess we expected. He had a "high school science teacher who's disappointed in you" kinda vibe. Condescending AND old... Yeesh.
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All in all it's a snooze festival. Not enough Tolkien in it to get my panties in a twist. Some CGI is very good and some is just laughably awful (the wolf).
WTF was up with the elf ship going into the Undying Lands? How JRRT described sailing there:
The grey rain-curtain of this world rolls back, and all turns to silver glass, and then you see it. White shores, and beyond, a far green country under a swift sunrise.
The show makes it look like they were consumed by fire after sailing into Mount Doom. Yeesh.
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With the exception of a few names from the appendices there's little resemblance to canon.
Almost forgot: Elrond can't attend a meeting because he isn't an "Elf Lord". That shit made me Hoot and Holla for real, lol
Elrond has Maiar blood, House of Fingolfin, etc. Only difference between Gil-Galad and Elrond is Gil-Galad descended from the male side.
This made me mad and laugh.
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Returning my daughter's Prime Video password now, lol.
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coopsgirl · 1 year
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All the money Amazon spent and this was the best they could do for the elven rings in Rings of Power? They look like the cheap rings you might get out of a gumball machine. This whole thing was just so amateur.
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dis-a-ppointment · 1 year
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Thinking about media monopolies makes me sad. Rest in Peace sapphic shows that were canceled prematurely, you deserved so much better.
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Even if you don't love all of these shows, it sucks that they were put on the chopping block simply because they were sapphic, I fucking hate it
*Footnote Anyone who tries to say "but they weren't canceled because they were queer, they were canceled because of *insert other reason*!" yes. but why is it always when they're picking shows to cancel, the sapphic ones go first?
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The ending of Carnival Row was so fucked up. I don't even know where to begin.
I shouldn't have been tricked into thinking that this show was going to be different, that it was going to show revolutionaries fairly. Of course it's gonna end with the message that "slow progress is better than revolution," it was sponsored by AMAZON. I just wish the characters and the world didn't have to be puppets for those stupid ideas. It was such beautiful worldbuilding, such a meaningful metaphor could be drawn, but instead in the end it was a testament to "good cops/rich people can change the system" and "revolution causes more harm than good, so please don't revolt against poor Amazon/police because you'll end up killing innocent children and leaving them to rot in muddy fields."
Legit went from a race riot massacre in the row to a few months later "weee there's peace in the row and it's all thanks to whatever Philo did during the cut, whatever that was! But look, all these happy couples should distract you from the lack of explanation about what the fuck happened! We couldn't think of a reason to make the ending happy so we just did it and hoped you wouldn't notice!" I just know Amazon cut this shit short on purpose.
Millworthy's speech sounded cool, but really meant nothing. "Power manipulates us and gives us no choices, but also only you can control your fate"??? What kinda centrist bullshit...
AND they had to go and kill off Darius when he COULD have been in a polyamorous/qpr relationship with Tourmaline and Vignette and Philo (or even just stayed as their friend). Like, if you wanted a big happy ending, that's a great way to do it. But noooo, everyone's gotta couple up in order to be truly happy.
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miss-galaxy-turtle · 6 months
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The way Mark's reflection is not only Nolan, which is what he fears becoming, but the way it's reflected in BLOOD which shows how Nolan is so brutal AND it shows that the reflection is distorted and that Mark really is different than his father??? Yaaaaall I'm gonna CRY cry
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