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#also going to study for 8 hours straight today because lately i have been procrastinating alot and there's so much things to do now

marvelouspeterparker · 3 years

Text

professor’s sweetheart

pairing: professor!tom holland x student!reader

summary: professor holland teaches british literature at your university. you hadn’t expected much when you signed up for the course, but the experience is everything and more than you could have hoped for.

word count: 15.1k

warnings: there is smut in here but it’s not the main focus (wild, i know)

notes: uh yeah i’d say just don’t fuck your professor? this is purely fictional. be safe, you know how it is <3

also she wrote a professor!harry styles fic, but if i hadn’t read that (over and over) i probably wouldn’t have been inspired to write this. so check out @songbirdstyles !

i listened to this playlist while writing it if ur interested :)

give me feedback please!!

“What class do you have next?” Your friend, and roommate Liz asked. You were both walking out of the cafeteria. It was 1:15, you had just finished lunch and you had fifteen minutes until your next class. You pushed the doors open together and braced yourselves as the cool late September breeze hit you, blowing your jackets open. You put both sides of the jacket together in front of you and crossed your arms to block the cold out.

“Um,” you thought back for a moment, the cold temporarily knocking your senses right out of you. “British Literature.”

If you were being honest, you had taken this course because it fulfilled one of your requirements, but in the end it felt like one of the most rewarding parts of your college experience so far. The material was interesting, and instead of being bored out of your mind throughout the whole hour and a half of class––it was actually entertaining. You had your professor to thank for that.

“Oooh,” Liz twisted her lips to the side to suppress a knowing smile, but the look in her eyes gave it away. “With Professor Holland?” She asked, batting her eyelashes innocently.

You rolled your eyes and bit your tongue to hide your smile. “Yes,” you shoved her playfully to the side making her step in a pile of leaves, the crunch under boots loud as ever as it carried through the crisp air. “Shut up.”

You and Liz had been roommates since your first year at university and had now spent four, coming up on five semesters rooming together. Luckily, you really hit it off, and easily fell into a routine together, forming a bond as you ate lunch and dinner together, studied in the library, had dance parties in your dorm, and more. You knew each other inside and out, often having random late night conversations while you procrastinated your work or couldn’t sleep, about literally anything and everything. Bottom line is, you trusted each other, which is why she knew about your sort-of-crush on Professor Holland.

To be fair everyone had a thing for him, he was just that kind of guy. He was sweet and compassionate and funny. Professor Holland was one of those genuine professors who sincerely cared about their students and their well-beings. He was incredibly understanding. He’d schedule dozens of meetings with his students all in one day just because he wanted to help and make sure they were all alright. He liked to check in every now and then, not because he had to, but because he wanted to.

From what you could tell he also seemed like a people person. No matter who he was with, whether it was a student, his teaching assistant Jacob, or his fellow professors––he was always attentive, cracking jokes, enjoying the conversation. Everyone seemed to love him. But you could also tell that a part of him was just a tad bit cocky, but in a joking and love-able way.

All this goes to show that you spent way too much time thinking about him, and observing him, which could either be seen as really endearing or really creepy.

“Look I’m just saying,” Liz shrugged, “Enjoy the class.” She nudged you, “I know I would.”

Realizing you were approaching the writing and arts center, and Liz’s next class was in the building across the street, you sent her off. “Yeah yeah, okay. Bye.” You tightened your arms around you and scurried off, skipping a crack in the sidewalk and walking up the steps to the building. You opened the door and were immediately welcomed by a rush of warm air and let out a sigh, rubbing your hands together as you made your way to the lecture hall.

You pulled your phone out and checked the time, 1:22. You still had 8 minutes to spare. You were still walking and only glanced up from your phone right as you were about to walk into the door and were stopped suddenly when you crashed into a hard chest. You immediately felt two warm hands grasp your arms to steady you and were suddenly enveloped by the smell of tea and mint.

“Woah! I’m sorry, love, are you alright?”

You froze as you looked up, feeling very much like a deer in headlights as you realized you quite literally crashed into your professor. “Oh––um,” you swallowed, suddenly feeling like the air was escaping you. You cleared your throat trying to save yourself from anymore embarrassment. “I’m fine––I’m sorry, that was my fault. I wasn’t looking––” You paused when you noticed the small smile on his face, his warm eyes making you forget what you were going to say.

“It’s alright, Y/N. It was partially my fault as well, I was too focused on––” he seemed to snap out of some trance, straightening himself up as his hands dropped back down to his sides and into his pockets. “Uh, well that’s not important.” He pulled one hand out of his pocket––he was wearing those blue slacks that you thought made his thighs look great, respectfully, of course. He checked the time on his watch and you had to stop yourself from ogling the veins in his arms as he did so.

He looked up at you, brows furrowed playfully and you actually had to remind yourself to breathe. “You’re almost ten minutes early. You that eager to see me?” He ended his question with a teasing smirk and your mouth opened and closed a few times before you managed to string together a response.

“I––um, I just really like this class and you––you’re my favorite professor.” You blurted out, your cheeks heating up as you realized what you just admitted. You had to force your eyes to go back to their normal size after they practically bulged at the realization of what you said. “And I mean, I just happened to get here early so...I thought I might as well get settled in.”

Your professor cleared his throat, trying to hide his smile as he glanced down at his shoes for a moment then back up at you. “Well then.” He extended his arm, pointing towards the open door of the hall and stepped aside. “Please, after you.”

You gave him a small smile in return along with a quiet thank you and stepped through the door. But before you could walk over to your seat, you felt him lean over behind you to talk lowly in your ear. He was standing a respectably close distance, but his presence was so overwhelming it was as though you felt him everywhere. His breath caressed the smooth skin of your cheek as he spoke.

“I’m technically not allowed to have favorites, but I do appreciate that you enjoy having me as your professor, darling.” It shouldn’t have had such an effect on you, really, it shouldn’t have. But something about him referring to himself by his title really did something to you. You took a sharp inhale as you stood up straight, your whole body on high alert as you turned your head towards him, your eyes refusing to look at his and instead finding solace in the fabric of his navy blue button up––which he’d rolled up to his forearms.

“And if it means anything, I rather do enjoy having you in my class as well.” You snuck a peek at him, lifting your gaze slowly and only caught a glimpse of his soft lips as he smiled before walking over to his desk.

You felt your heart pounding in your chest as you walked up the steps to your usual spot in the middle row, near the aisle. Your legs felt like they were going to give out any minute, and the man hadn’t even touched you––well not in the way you wanted him to, anyway. But enough of that.

You checked your phone again, trying to calm down your heartbeat as you took in a deep breath, 1:28. People started shuffling into the class, the overlapping sounds of chatter and laughter rupturing the energy the room had when it was just the two of you. At 1:32 Professor Holland started the class, getting everyone’s attention smoother than anyone should be able to. You could almost feel everyone’s eyes focusing on him, some weren’t even listening to him, they were just so entranced by how good he looked and the way he sounded––his accent was just so endearing, you had to admit it.

The hour and a half went by rather quickly but today you were more aware of yourself, of Professor Holland––even more than usual. It seemed as though his eyes would travel to your direction more often, after he made jokes as if to see your reaction, or while he paused in his speeches.

At the end of the class, despite there being dozens of other students moving around you, you felt as though your professor was watching you as you made your way out of the room. But it had to be your imagination, there was just no way.

When you got back to your dorm, Liz still wasn’t back yet so you decided to take a shower and spend some time relaxing. You had already done your work for the next day and your other work for the rest of the week––well, you decided you’d do it later.

You changed into sweats after your shower and hopped on your bed, deciding to switch between your apps for an hour or so––honestly you’d lost track of time. Liz strolled in soon after, closing the door with a loud groan, throwing her bag on the floor.

You smiled, looking up at her from your lying position on the bed. “Hello to you too.”

She grumbled in response, finally looking at you. When she noticed you were already wearing your pajamas she pointed to you, her brows raised. “Good idea!” She immediately went to her drawers and picked out a random pair of sweats and an oversized sweatshirt, changing with lightning speed for someone who was sluggishly groaning not even a minute before.

She grabbed her phone and sat on her bed opposite yours, cross-legged, facing you. She looked at your face for a few seconds before squinting her eyes at you. “You have something to say. Spill.”

You rolled your eyes, a smile on your face.

She looked at you pointedly, “Well go on.”

So you told her about your encounter with the infamous brit today, how you bumped into him, what he said to you, the glances he sent your way. When you finished recounting everything you took a deep breath, “But––this could all just be in my head you know, just me overreacting.”

She stared at you with a dead expression. “Are you fucking dumb?”

“Hey!”

She ignored you, rolling her eyes while she tried not to laugh. “Dude he totally wants to fuck you.” She said nonchalantly.

Your eyes bulged, “W–What do you––What?”

“Oh please, it’s so obvious.”

You opened your mouth but when nothing came out, you paused and looked down at the carpet. After a few moments you looked back up at her to find her with a knowing smirk on her face. “Are you serious?”

“Of course I am, when am I not?” When you were about to speak, she interrupted you. “Don’t answer that. But look, it seems like he’s into you. I think you should hit that.”

“But we––that’s not allowed!” You paused, “Is it?”

She laughed, “A ha! So you do want to!”

“Oh shut up, you already knew that. Everyone wants to, it’s not a big deal.”

She made a face, “Yes, but you’re the only one who actually has a chance at getting it.”

You looked at her, a skeptical look on your face. “Even if that was true––he’s still my professor…”

She sighed, rolling her eyes. “Yeah but it’s not like it’s in the handbook or anything. Plus, you’re both legal adults, so. There you have it. You’re free to bone.”

“You did not just say that.”

“But I did.” She smiled, lying down in her bed. “You really could, though. Just don’t tell anybody.” When you didn’t say anything else, she spoke up. “Okay I’m gonna take a nap now. You have a lot to think about.”

You ignored the last part and went back to your phone, “Yeah you do that.”

Throughout the rest of the afternoon and night you couldn’t stop thinking about this whole situation. This was bad...Or was it? It seemed all too complicated, that was for sure. You weren’t even sure he looked at you or thought of you that way.

You fell asleep playing all the pros and cons of hypothetically getting with him, your mind an endless loop of your professor, his voice, how he sounded when he practically whispered that he liked being your teacher. This was all too much.

❊❊❊❊

All of your senses were in overdrive. All you could feel were the hands tracing every curve of your body, playing you like a toy they’d made themselves. The tongue, teeth and lips following and leaving marks everywhere the hands traced. All you could hear was that sweet, rough voice telling you praises and calling you endearing names as your whole body shivered from the pleasure. Your eyes locked in on the ones staring up at you with pure hunger and awe as you ground yourself down on his cock.

“That’s it darling, just like that. You’re doing so good for me.” His lips curved into that oh so familiar smirk. “I taught you well, didn’t I?”

You woke up sweaty, your shirt sticking to your torso, a wet patch on your panties, your nipples pebbled in the cool air of your dorm room. A sex dream. Of course you had a fucking sex dream about him. Fuck. You were just lucky that your next class with him was on Thursday so you didn’t have to see him today. Because that would not help you at all.

You checked the time on your phone, squinting at the brightness before turning it all the way down, 10am. You got out of bed with a groan and took your toiletries bag and your towel to the bathroom, deciding to take a shower this morning, instead of later on at night. Lord knows you certainly needed one. A cold one too.

You were frustrated, frustrated with yourself for feeling this way about your professor––sure, he was only a few years older than you, but it was the principle of the matter––frustrated that you were overthinking this entire thing, and most importantly you were annoyed because you were extremely horny.

When you got into the bathroom, you locked the door and set your stuff down. You put your hands on both sides of the sink and looked at yourself in the mirror. Who are we and what happened? You sighed and grabbed your toothbrush, brushing your teeth quickly and aggressively, since everything seemed to be a hassle this morning. You’d hoped that once you hopped in the shower, you’d calm down.

When you made your way inside, you sighed contently at the feeling of the warm water pattering against your skin, freshening you up immediately. Your nipples were still hard, between your legs still wet. So you brought a hand down between your thighs, the other to your breast as you stood under the water––almost as though the water was washing away the sinful act and thoughts right at the source. You laughed at the thought, nope, nothing can wash this away.

You squeezed your breast and tugged at your nipple, rubbing your sensitive bud just the way you liked. You were still sensitive from...your dream, so it didn’t take long for everything to build up. You couldn’t help yourself, your mind brought back the remnants of last night that you remembered, the way his hands gripped you when he steadied you, the way his arms looked, and you came with a whimper that was louder than you would have liked. You bit your lip, closing your eyes and resting your head back on the tiles as the water continued to fall on you.

When you came back to your dorm, Liz was on her way out but she stopped, raising her brows at you, “So have you come to a conclusion?”

You walked past her into the dorm, “Go to class, Liz.” You heard her cackle down the hallway as you closed the door.

You got dressed casually, not rushing since there was nowhere for you to go and decided to go to the local cafe near the school. You needed to clear your head and get some work done, and you definitely would not get any of it done in your dorm. Not today, anyway.

You checked the weather and seeing that it was a little warmer today, you put a sweatshirt on, grabbed your bag along with your phone and your laptop and you were on your way. The breeze felt refreshing this morning as you stepped out of your dorm. Your walk to the cafe was only ten or so minutes but it felt good.

Stepping into the little shop, you were immediately hit by the aroma of coffee and sweets, surrounded by the sound of light chatter and utensils clattering on the wooden tables. The warm light above you brought a sense of comfort as you made your way over to the counter. The line was rather short so you managed to order your usual drink and snack quickly. As you were waiting for the cashier to hand you your things, your eyes scanned the shop––the ambience was rather nice and the talking almost felt like background noises. You wouldn’t mind staying here to work.

As you gathered your things, you turned around in search of a free table–��which would be the deciding factor in whether or not you would stay, you did not want to awkwardly share the small table space with some stranger. You took a few steps into the seating area and almost choked on your breath when you made eye contact with the last person you wanted to see today.

He smiled charmingly at you, teeth and all and quickly made his way over before you even had a chance to think of escaping. “Y/N!” He stood in front of you, his eyes bright. He was actually happy to see you? He was always happy to see everyone, it didn’t mean anything.

His voice snapped you out of your annoyingly loud thoughts. “Fancy seeing you here.” He nudged you playfully, “How are you?” He was wearing a very tight white button up that was unbuttoned until the third, showing a generous amount of his chest, a grey suit and pants, along with a messenger bag slung over his shoulder. It took you a few more seconds than it should have to process that there were actual words coming out of his mouth.

You forced a smile onto your face but the more you looked into his eyes, the more genuine it became, almost impossible to wipe off. “I’m good. Was just grabbing breakfast before I start my work. You?”

He raised his cup, “Same as you. Have a bit of time before my next class.”

You noticed that you couldn’t tell what exactly was in the cup and your curiosity got the better of you. You pointed to the cup clasped in his fingers, “Is that coffee?”

He furrowed his brows in mock offense, “I only drink tea, darling.” He leaned his upper body forward to whisper to you, his cheek almost touching yours, “I’d think you would know that about your favorite professor.” He tutted playfully as he stood up straight again, watching you, a look that you couldn’t quite pinpoint in his eyes as he watched you over his cup, taking a teasingly long sip.

You looked up at him, your mouth slightly open, not a clue what to respond. When he pulled the cup away from his mouth he looked down at you, his gaze drifting down and you’d never felt more exposed, despite the fact that you were wearing two layers of clothing. “I like your sweatshirt.” He smiled, glancing down at it before looking directly into your eyes, his head lowered slightly.

Your eyes widened in surprise and your head snapped down to see your spiderman sweatshirt looking back at you boldly. Oh––Oh. You lifted your head back up to find him still smiling at you softly, he didn’t seem to be teasing you at all. “Um thanks.” You could feel your cheeks heating up, despite the cool air that swept your legs as someone opened the door to the cafe. “Are you uh–– a marvel fan?”

He pursed his lips playfully, “Yeah,” his hand came up to rub the back of his neck, “Yeah you could say that.” He licked his lips and took another sip of his drink.

Your eyes, with a mind of their own, trailed down the column of his throat, following the vein on the side of his neck, the way his adams apple bobbed as he swallowed the warm liquid. The action almost seemed provocative, in both meanings of the term.

Suddenly you felt very hot and you knew that you had to get out of there before you made a fool of yourself in front of everyone, but most importantly him. You perked up, “I uh––I have to go professor, but it was nice talking with you. See you tomorrow!” With that you quite literally ran off, wincing as you turned around, having noticed the way his lips parted as if to speak, a furrow between his brows appearing out of confusion and concern. You really had to get control of yourself.

You practically berated yourself as you speed walked away. God, that was so stupid. And not to mention, incredibly rude! He’d probably be upset with you now, or maybe even mad. It’s just––unbelievable what he did to you, without even actually doing anything. It took you the entire walk there to realize that you unconsciously made your way back to your dorm––so much for the library. But you’d had enough social interaction for today, so you decided you’d stay there.

You got in your bed and buried yourself under the covers, deciding you needed the comfort of being hidden in your mattress after the embarrassment you’d just experienced. You lied there just staring at the plain, white ceiling for way too long until you let out a loud huff and sat up, before grabbing your computer to start your work.

Deciding to check your college email before you started, since they were incessant and it was easy to miss something, you scanned down the list of messages in your inbox. Your eyes skimmed through the boxes on the left of your screen, notifications that your professors left feedback on your assignments, the weekly newsletter, club events, a message from Holland, Tom––

You shut your computer immediately, eyes bulging as you held your breath. You swallowed thickly, as you stared into nothing in front of you, your eyes barely taking in anything, your mind a big ball of fuzz.

After taking a few deep breaths, and telling your overdramatic brain to calm down, you opened the laptop again. Biting your lip, you hovered your mouse over the message, reading over the small bits of information you could see in the preview.

Holland, Tom

Just checking in

Hi Y/N, I just wanted to make …

You could feel your heart beating through your chest. Oh God––Wanted to make sure what?? The sensible part of your brain said to just open it to figure it out for yourself. But the irrational, idiotic part of your brain was yelling at you to not open it under any circumstance. What if he wanted to make sure you didn’t get the wrong idea? Did he know how you felt about him? Were you that obvious? Maybe he thinks you’re clinically insane and wants to make sure you’re getting the attention you need? You did run off like a crazy person, after all.

You shut your eyes tight and groaned loudly into your hands. Liz walked in and whistled lowly, taking in everything in front of her. You looked up, confused and looked at the time, realizing it had already been two hours since you first left the dorm, meaning she was done with her classes for the day.

“What’s up?” She took a seat at her desk, propping her legs on the table as she leaned back.

You waved her off, deciding it would be best to let this blow over and ignore it for now. You’d go back when you were in the right state of mind.

She started telling you about her day and annoyingly, your brain decided today would be the day that it would not shut off. Your brows were furrowed as you tried your best to focus on what your friend was saying, but she wasn’t even looking in your direction, staring up into the air above her as she spoke animated, hands waving around, so she didn’t even notice you struggling to pay attention.

Your eyes kept flitting back to the screen of your computer, your fingers swiping across the trackpad to turn it back on when the screen’s brightness lowered every now and then.

Liz looked back at you and stopped her spiel. “Alright what’s up with you?”

You sighed deeply and looked up at her. “Sorry, sorry. I just––I saw Professor Holland today––”

“Already?” She interrupted you, a goofy smile on her face. “Damn, you work fast.”

You threw the nearest pillow at her, “Shut up! I didn’t fuck him.”

“You should’ve.” She pointed out, holding the pillow to her chest.

You glared at her until she raised her hands in surrender, then continued, your eyes bouncing from object to object in the room as you babbled.

“I went to the cafe and I saw him and he came over to me and we started talking––and he whispered in my ear and he was joking around with me and he sipped his tea and he was super close to me and super hot, and I couldn’t handle it so I basically ran off without giving him a chance to say bye.” You took a deep breath, “And then he sent me an email after I saw him and I still haven’t opened it because I’m scared and I don’t know what he said…” You took another breath and looked at your friend, blinking as she just stared at you.

After a moment, she spoke up. “Dude just open the email.”

Your eyes widened almost in offense. “Did you not listen to anything I just said?”

“Yeah you practically fucked in the cafe then you got scared and ran away.” She spoke nonchalantly and you could tell she was fighting off a smile. “Look, eventually you have to open the email anyway, you can’t just ignore it. So just do it and rip the bandaid off.” You were about to speak up when she interrupted you, “I promise it won’t be half as bad as you think. We both know your mind is absolutely filled with the craziest ideas.”

You huffed and fell back down on the bed, not bothering to argue since you both knew she was right.

“Shit, I’m starving.” She looked at the time, “Yeah it’s about time for me to eat food.” She stood up, “Come on, let’s go.”

“Can you please get something for me?” She knew you well enough that you didn’t have to tell her what to get. You gave her your best smile and shrugged your shoulders.

“Are you serious.” She looked at you, deadpan, standing like the little emoji of the woman standing in place with her arms at her sides.

You had to suppress your smile, “What if I see him?” You asked incredulously, lying further in the covers. “I’d rather stay in here and hide, for now.”

“You have class with him tomorrow––”

“That’s why I said for now.”

She cracked a smile, rolling her eyes as she grabbed her things, “You’re ridiculous.”

“Love you!”

“Yeah yeah,” she waved her hand and walked out the door.

A few moments passed after Liz left and you sat up yet again, putting your computer on your lap as you swiped the trackpad, making the screen light up again. You checked the time, it had been almost an hour since he sent the email, you really shouldn’t make him wait any longer. Not that he’s waiting at all, he probably didn’t even notice that you hadn’t responded.

You inhaled and exhaled slowly, swallowed your nerves and clicked on the email.

Holland, Tom

Just checking in

Hi Y/N,

I just wanted to make sure everything was alright. You seemed kind of stressed when you left earlier and I’m hoping it wasn’t because of anything I did. Can we check in tomorrow in my office? Hope everything is going well.

Warmest Regards,

Professor Holland

He wanted to meet tomorrow after class. In his office. Alone.

Oh, fuck. You could hear Liz in your head going Yes, fuck. But you quickly shoved her aside.

You read over the email about five times to make sure you weren’t misinterpreting anything, because that would be even more embarrassing. You clicked the reply button and slowly wrote out your response.

Hi Professor Holland,

Everything is fine, but thank you for asking, I appreciate the concern. I’m free tomorrow after class if you’re available then.

Thank you!

Y/N

You hit send and not even two minutes later, you received a response.

Hi Y/N,

Perfect! I’ll see you then :)

Warmly,

Professor Holland

How on earth were you supposed to focus on your work now? More importantly, how were you going to focus in class tomorrow?

❊❊❊❊

The next day, the butterflies in your stomach would not calm down. When you stepped into the class, he was talking to another student and you tried to sneak past to your seat unnoticed. You thought you’d succeeded but once you sat down and looked up, you made direct eye contact with him and you swear you stopped breathing. You barely even recognized the sound of everyone moving around you, getting ready for class to start.

He parted his lips and reluctantly turned back to the student still talking to him, snapping out of his daze, but not after glancing back at you. You swallowed and sank down in your seat. This was going to be a long class.

At 1:35, class started. Professor Holland stood up and clasped his hands, making his way to the middle of the floor in front of everybody, his voice reverberating through the room.

“Good afternoon everybody. Hope you’re all doing well.” His eyes found yours and you bit your lip nervously. You could see him swallow as he watched you, before moving his gaze elsewhere. Was that because of you? Surely, it had to be a coincidence. Maybe you made him uncomfortable. Oh great––

He went on, seemingly unfazed, eyes darting back to you subtly before continuing. The discussion soon turned to the book you’d just been assigned to read. The book was rather lengthy but there were always so many things to talk about within only a few pages––which you loved, so it was taking you all a while to go through everything together in class.

The conversations often took up a lot of the class time since Professor Holland simply loved talking and he always found everyone’s interpretations interesting and worth exploring––eager to hear our classmates perspectives. He also often said that he was not good at using technology, so he preferred to just talk and show rather than use his computer. Honestly, you found it endearing.

The conversations were always interesting to listen to, people never failed to give you insight on things you hadn’t even thought of before, but sometimes––some people were just a little stupid.

Someone brought up a slightly sexist point that made absolutely no sense but since you weren’t the one to call someone out in front of a room full of people, you stuck to your facial reactions instead of audibly responding. You turned back to the front of the class to see Professor Holland’s opinion to find that he was watching you, trying and failing to suppress his smile.

He put both hands in his pockets which you found ironic considering they would jump out any time soon––he loved to talk with his hands. His eyes got serious, the smile on his face a little less friendly as he addressed the sophomore who made the comment. “I don’t know if you’re aware of how ludicrously sexist that comment you just made was, but now you know.” He turned to the rest of the class. “Remember to think before you speak. This isn’t to necessarily call anyone out. It’s a warning. Senseless remarks will not only affect my view of you, but your grades as well.”

He went on and tried to shape the boy’s comment into something appropriate to discuss and you honestly couldn’t focus on anything else he said, you were just looking at him in awe and in shock. Sure, this was the bare minimum, but since it was so rare to see, it was very noticeable and even impressive when you noticed it.

God, you adored this man.

Near the end of class, he announced the next assignment, a paper you’d have to write about a comparison you made between any point in the story, a character, a theme, a hidden meaning, etc. and something in our modern reality, a social norm, a popular belief, etc. Your essays were always very open ended in this class, giving you room to write about almost anything you wanted to. Your professor knew that the assignments would be more enjoyable if there was some choice involved. He truly was good at his job.

“Look, reading’s hard sometimes, I get it. I’m dyslexic, so trust me, I understand. But I never let that stop me.” He paused to look around the room and it was so silent you could hear each other’s inhales and exhales. The power he had over a room full of around one hundred people was insane, and in a weird way, also turned you on. “I know the book is massive. Listen to the audio books if you have to, I don’t mind. But get the work done either way. It’s not for me, it’s for you. I want you to get the best grade you can in this class.”

“Bring me interesting material. I don’t want to fall asleep reading your work.” He joked and smiled proudly when laughter filled the room. “The essay is due in two weeks. Good luck.”

There were a few thank you’s and goodbyes scattered around the room as he sent everyone off, people scurrying from all sides to the exits.

You took your time gathering all your things and took a deep breath when the last few people made their way out, silence soon surrounding the both of you. You put your bag over your shoulder and walked down the carpeted steps, suddenly finding the dark grey pattern to be the most interesting things you’ve ever seen––and also watching your steps so that you don’t fall down them in front of him. You could barely hear the soft patter of your shoes as you walked down. When you finally got the main floor you looked up and saw him waiting for you patiently, things in his hands, a smile on his face.

“Let’s go then, shall we?” You nodded shyly and he led the way, his office only a hallway away from the lecture hall. You found it slightly odd that he didn’t try to make conversation on your way there, since he always loved to. But you tried not to think too hard about it. Maybe he was just tired.

When you reached his office, he opened the door and let you walk in first. Your eyes immediately scanned the room out of curiosity as you stepped inside, noticing his desk, the wood a dark mahogany which was covered with stacks of papers, picture frames, pens, and a few marvel funko pops––so he really was a fan. You’d never actually been inside of his office before. It was an intimidating thought for you to be in his office with him, alone. You just didn’t want to embarrass yourself.

You turned to him and gestured to the chair across from his desk, “Do I just––”

“Please,” he interrupted eagerly. “Make yourself comfortable.”

You took a seat and he set his things down next to his desk before sitting as well. His hair was coiffed to perfection today, curls sculpted nicely, a dark blue suit on his body with a black shirt underneath. He took off the suit jacket and put it on the back of his chair and you could see his veins and muscles bulging and shifting in his arms as he moved. He clasped his hands in front of him on the desk and wow he had nice fingers. You really had to get a grip on yourself––

“How was class today for you? Well, besides that one disappointing comment.”

You smiled, “I always enjoy the class, but yeah that was uh, disappointing as you said.

“I think your interpretations are always very insightful and very interesting. It’s almost a shame that you don’t share them with the whole class but part of me likes it that we keep them between us.” Oh? “Plus, I know how scary it can be talking in front of all those people. I almost shit myself first time I taught that class––”

You let out a surprised laughter and he couldn’t help laugh as well.

“Shit, sorry! I mean––” He sighed, “Language, sorry. I’m British.” He shrugged, “Can’t help it.”

You shook your head, “It’s okay. Personally I think curse words spice up conversations.” You smiled proudly when he laughed at your joke.

His smile radiated a more nervous energy after his laughter died off. “When you ran off yesterday, that wasn’t––was that because of me? Because if I did something to make you uncomfortable I’m so sorry.”

You tilted your head, trying to think of a way to explain. “No it wasn’t, well––it kind of was?” You had no idea why you would tell him this, but apparently your mouth was moving without agreeing with your mind first.

There was almost a pout on his face and you had the sudden urge to reach over the table and smooth it out with your lips. “It’s just, well––You make me just a little bit nervous, to be honest professor.” You looked down at your lap and back up at him timidly.

He raised his brows, “Oh––”

Your smile was strained and you wanted nothing more than to be swallowed whole by the floor.

“Well that’s not a bad thing, is it?” He looked at you almost, hopefully?

You laughed, “No trust me, it’s not.” Your eyes widened at the realization of what you’d basically just admitted to him and you didn’t know if you should feel embarrassed or relieved when the smirk appeared on his face.

But the words that he uttered next cleared that up for you. “Well, if I’m honest, you make me nervous too, darling. And definitely not in a bad way.” He leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms, almost teasing you with how good he looked.

You licked your lips, your mouth suddenly feeling dry, crossing your legs, your thighs squeezing together, and he definitely noticed, his eyes trailing down your body as he licked his lips as well.

The tension in the room was so thick but you found that you didn’t want to escape it, if anything you wanted to carve your way through it, stay for as long as you could until it snapped.

Your professor spread his legs, his hands coming down to rub at his thighs as he watched you and the sound of your heartbeat pounding filled your ears. It was almost as if there was an unseen force pulling the two of you together, but before it could there was a knock at the door.

The both of your heads snapped to the door to find it opening slowly. Jacob, Tom’s teaching assistant popped his head in. You had talked to him a few times, he was always very nice. He didn’t attend every class, but you guessed that he would be attending the next one. “Hey man.” He turned to you and smiled, “Oh hi Y/N.” You waved and let out a small hi in response. He turned back to the professor. “Your next class is starting like––” He looked at his watch. “Now.”

“Shit, sorry man. Lost track of time.” He got up and you did too, smiling sheepishly as you grabbed your things, getting up from your seat. “I’ll be right there.” Jacob nodded and closed the door.

You both made your way over to the exit slowly, still reeling from what maybe could have happened and what you both obviously thought of. The silence was loud around you, but it wasn’t scary this time.

“Let me know if you need any help with the upcoming assignment, alright? Don’t be afraid to stop by if you need to.” His gaze dropped down to your lips for a split second before reaching your eyes again. “For anything.” He looked at you with an expression you couldn’t describe but quickly tried to mask it with a smile as he opened the door for you, his eyes practically holding yours captive.

“Thank you, professor. I will.”

You stepped out and he watched you for a few moments before closing the door. You looked back, smiling as you caught his eye and as soon as he stepped back in the office, you practically ran out of the building and to your dorm, a stupid grin on your face.

“Holy shit.”

❊❊❊❊

When you practically burst into your dorm room, scaring Liz half to death before you told her what happened, let’s just say she wasn’t surprised in the slightest.

“I fucking told you!” She flopped onto her bed, still staring at you pointedly as she did so, a smirk on her face. She pointed at you before dropping her hand down dramatically by her side. “You like, owe me a soda now or something.”

You rolled your eyes but you were so giddy the smile still hadn’t dropped from your face. “Well I do owe you for getting me lunch yesterday, so maybe I will buy you one.”

❊❊❊❊

Over the weekend, you started working on the essay for British Literature and you were already about halfway done since the topic you chose actually interested you. But you found yourself questioning if you were writing it properly as you went on. You weren’t sure if it was because you wanted it to be near perfect since you’d found out he paid extra attention to you, or maybe you just wanted to talk to him again––you’d never know.

After discussing with Liz, you decided you’d stop by his office on Monday afternoon once you were done with your classes. You knew he liked to stay in his office until late at night sometimes, he always said we could stop by whenever, if we needed something. So you decided to take advantage of that, shoving down your anxious thoughts and doing what you wanted.

Liz may or may not have convinced you to wear a shirt that was––aesthetically pleasing, to put it, specifically in the chest area so you were more than eager to see your professor’s reaction. You were a little nervous, you didn’t want it to seem like you were trying too hard, but you thought you looked good in this shirt, and you had a right to feel good about yourself. Since it was a little chilly outside, you hid it under a sweatshirt for now.

You got to his office and found yourself staring at the dark wood, hesitating to knock on. After taking a deep breath you rapped your knuckles against the door.

You heard a faint Come in! And you took a deep breath and opened the door slowly to find him sitting at his desk, “Hi Professor Holland.” He was finishing some notes on a student’s essay but his head snapped up immediately at the sound of your voice.

He dropped his pen and sat up, “Please,” he motioned to the seat across from his desk and you smiled gratefully before settling down. “What can I do for you? Everything alright?”

His eyes looked sincere and concerned and you could feel your insides melting a little bit.

“I just––I really want to do well on this essay,” He nodded for you to continue, “But I’m just not sure if I’m going in the right direction.”

He nodded understandingly, “Well let’s have a look, shall we?”

You reached down to grab your things when he stood up and walked past you, your eyes following him in confusion. He gestured to the couch, a somewhat impish smile on his face. “Just thought it would be more comfortable––and easier for us to look together, of course.”

You nodded, a small smile on your face as you picked up your bag and sat next to him on the couch. “Right, of course.” It was a loveseat so there wasn’t much room for either of you to distance yourselves.

You got out your computer and opened up the essay. You had already opened it before you got there, not wanting to have to awkwardly wait for it to load. Yes, you overthought things but––it helped sometimes. “I see you came prepared,” he joked and you couldn’t help but smile. He really did notice everything, didn’t he.

“Well I’m really confident about the topic of my essay, I think it’s interesting. But I feel like I may be adding too much into the paper, and I’m not sure if I’m overthinking things or if I should take some things out.”

“I’m sure it’s not as bad as you think. I meant it when I said I appreciate having you in my class, you know. I always love reading your work. You write well.”

“Thank you, professor.” Though you saw his eyes darken at the title, he commented on it.

“You can call me Tom when we’re alone, darling. No need for formalities.”

“But I like calling you professor––” Your hand shot up to cover your mouth and you spoke before he could, ignoring his smile, “I mean um. Tom––Okay I can try that.”

His tongue passed under his teeth, a devilish smirk on his face as he watched you squirm under his gaze. “No you know, now I think professor is growing on me.”

You pursed your lips, rolling your eyes. “Prof––Tom.”

He raised his hands in surrender, “Alright alright.”

“Why don’t you read it to me? It’s easier to see where you can improve when you hear it out loud.”

You swallowed nervously, nodding your head as you brought your laptop closer to you. “O––Okay.”

You started reading your paper out loud, voice becoming slightly steadier as you went on, two fingers scrolling up the trackpad. He made comments as you read, only praise––and with each compliment you felt yourself getting hotter. Very good. Always write so well. Nice point there. Mhm. Good girl, that’s an excellent point. He shifted his way closer to you gradually as you read on and when his thigh touched yours, you had to tell yourself not to jump from the contact.

He placed his arm on the back of the couch, basically around your shoulder and you had to smush down the urge to throw your computer and climb into his lap. His thighs did look very inviting with the way he was sitting, though.

He moved closer to you and you could feel his breath cascading down over your shoulder as he brought his hand to the trackpad, his arm over your thigh, fingers scrolling through to where he had a few suggestions.

When he finished his few remarks, you could hear the proud smile in his voice. “See, I knew it wouldn’t be as bad as you thought. You’re a good writer...” He paused and you turned your head slightly to find his lips mere inches from yours, his eyes trained on your mouth. His words were barely a whisper when he spoke up again, “A good student.” You both leaned in slowly and his hand came up to hold your cheek lightly. “Bet you’d be a good girl for me too.”

You gasped lightly and leaned forward, giving in and finally pressing your lips to his, both your hands grabbing his jaw. He moaned immediately, his body pressing into yours as you twisted to face him, his other hand coming around your waist to pull you in. You felt your laptop slipping off your thighs and squeaked, making the both of you laugh and pull away, flustered.

“Careful, love.” Tom grabbed the computer and put it down on the floor gently, confirming that you saved your work before pushing the lid closed.

The air in the room was hot, thanks to Tom in general, but also thanks to what you just did. So you pulled away and couldn’t help but smile at the sight of Tom’s pout when he thought you were getting up to leave. Since there wasn’t much space on the couch, you stood up to take your hoodie off and you heard his breath hitch when his eyes fell upon the shirt you were wearing. “Christ-”

“Now what’s this?” Tom said almost to himself, his eyes staring at you in wonder and awe. “Never seen this little number before.” He noticed the clothes you wore? His hands were already aching to feel you again, reaching out for you subconsciously and you bit your lip to calm your smile as you sat back down, letting your sweater fall to the floor softly.

“What, this old thing?” You joked, looking down at the shirt––yeah, you looked good. “You like it?” You looked up at him, a cheekily innocent look in your eyes.

He put his hands around your waist and pulled you into his lap, enjoying the gasp it elicited from you. You put your hands gingerly on his shoulders and the way he was looking up at you made you never want to leave this position ever again. You tilted your head and licked your lips and Tom couldn’t take it anymore, he kissed you again, hands gripping you firmly, anchoring you to him. He pulled away after a good while, wanting to look at you again, his lips parted, practically panting like an animal. You really had an effect on him, but he did the same to you.

His eyes were taking you in, basically capturing a mental image for later. “God, you look heavenly, darling.” You squirmed in his lap and bit your lip when you felt a bulge growing underneath you. He leaned forward and left a trail of kisses on the tops of your breasts, leaving a few teasing nips and sucks here and there. You squealed, your hands coming up to run your fingers through his hair. You pulled his head up by his hair and the look in his eyes looked absolutely feral––like he wanted to eat you.

You were about to lean in and kiss him again when a knock at the door surprised the both of you. You both jumped off of the couch as Tom threw out excuses. “Yeah just a second!” You straightened out your shirt as Tom did the same to his pants and you picked up your things.

When he saw that you were settled, he took a deep breath and answered the door. His colleague and best friend Professor Osterfield, was standing there, a grin on his face. “You div, are you ever going to be on time for our monthly meetings?––” He stood up straight when he noticed you standing behind Tom. “Oh, I didn’t know you had company.” He looked between the two of you and it seemed as though he pieced everything together. Maybe Tom had told him about you? If he did, you wouldn’t be worried Tom didn’t seem like the type to tell unreliable people his business––and they were best friends after all.

You smiled at him in acknowledgement as moved aside to let you pass. “Sorry,” you looked between the both of them, “I’ll let you get to whatever you have to go to.” You looked at Tom once you were out of his office, “Thank you for the feedback, professor.”

You could see him fighting off his smirk before he replied, “Of course.” His stare was impenetrable as he looked at you, “Feel free to come by whenever.” You could see the hidden meaning in his words and let the hint of a smile show, before nodding and walking off.

Harrison looked at him, a pitiful smile on his face. “I hope you know what you’re doing, mate. You should be careful, for the both of you.”

Tom sighed, not wanting to have this conversation. “I know, man. Let’s go.”

❊❊❊❊

You found yourself missing Tom as soon as you left. God, this was kind of pathetic. But at least your feelings weren’t necessarily one sided––he did say you made him nervous too after all. You doubt he’d say that if he just wanted to fuck you––he was better than most men. And sure you might be a little biased, but at the end of the day he had a good heart and he was educated. So bonus.

When you stepped into your dorm, your roommate was sitting on her bed, snacks in hand as she looked at you expectantly. “Now these,” she gestured to the food on her bed, “are either for a story time, to rebuild your energy or both.”

You laughed and changed into your pajamas, starting to tell your best friend about everything that just happened. She often interrupted with her reactions and comments.

Oh. My. God.

Shut. Up.

You’re fucking lying!

“But we didn’t fuck.”

“Boo––”

“Yes, boo.” You laughed, “Professor Osterfield knocked at the door and dragged him off to a meeting so.” You shrugged.

“Professor Osterfield...is that the hot blond one?” You nodded and she continued expressing her feelings for the man. “I’d let him teach me a few things––”

“Literally bye.”

She laughed, “What? Come on have you seen him––”

“I’m a little preoccupied with another professor to be honest.”

She nodded, handing you a bag of chips as you settled in your bed. “True. And oh how lucky you are.” You smiled in agreement.

❊❊❊❊

Today was the day the essay was due and though you normally handed it in at the beginning of class, for once, you didn’t and you could feel Tom’s gaze following you as you walked up the steps to your seat without so much as a glance in his direction. You’d stopped by his office a few times over the past two weeks since Harrison interrupted you, but you never did anything more than kissing and grinding. You were both too scared of getting caught, but that doesn’t mean you hadn’t thought about doing more in there.

Tom liked to have physical copies of the essays, just in case technology decides it’s against him (his words), so everyone had until 8pm tonight to drop it off by his office. You were definitely going to use that to your advantage.

You didn’t wear anything provocative to class, you didn’t really want that kind of attention today, plus you knew that Tom’s interest in you wasn’t solely based on your appearance. So you put the revealing items on under your clothing. And honestly, the thought that no one knew what you were wearing underneath it all only excited you even further.

You crossed your legs, relieving your tension and biting your lip as class went on, enjoying how flustered Tom would be every time he looked at you. You felt so submissive when you were alone with him, but when you were in public like this? Free to tease him subtly from a distance? That’s where you had all the power.

You had him blushing and stuttering throughout the whole class, though it wouldn’t have been easy for everyone else to notice, for you it was so obvious. He kept rubbing his hands together, pacing around as his eyes darted to you every few minutes. At one point he went over to sit down at his desk, which he rarely did while teaching––and you were fairly certain it was to hide a bulge in his pants. All thanks to you.

In the middle of the class, you felt your phone vibrate in your bag and pulled it out just to see if it was an emergency. You were pleasantly surprised and could feel your whole body react when you noticed who the message was from.

Tom: Having fun, are you?

Your eyes shot up to the front of the room and you bit your lip to contain your smile when you noticed him glaring at you.

Y/N: I always have fun in this class, professor ;)

You put your phone away afterwards and focused on the class, knowing it was killing Tom that you weren’t giving him more attention. Your heart was racing and your panties had a wet patch by the time class was over. You had a feeling he was going to try to keep you after class, so you hurried up and gathered your things, sighing in relief when a few students went up to his desk to talk to him.

You smirked to yourself and headed straight for the door, your head high on your shoulders. But just as you were about two feet from the exit, Tom spoke up.

“I assume I’ll be seeing you later, Miss Y/L/N?”

You turned around, eyes slightly widening as you noticed him, the group of students near him.

He smirked slyly, “To turn in your paper, remember?” His eyes were giving you a knowing look.

You swallowed, nodding as you smiled at him innocently. “Of course, professor.” You enjoyed the way his eyes darkened only slightly, only noticeable to you. “See you then.” With that you walked out.

❊❊❊❊

You practically skipped to his office at around 7:45, before knocking at the door, four knocks in a specific pattern––the code you’d made together.

“Come in, darling!”

You walked in and quickly shut the door, a chuckle escaping you. “You know someone could hear you from the outside one day, right?”

He shrugged, “I’ll just blame it on my accent. Could call everyone darling, they don’t know any better.”

You laughed. “Okay well––Professor Holland,” you said, loving the way he looked at you when you uttered his title. “I brought this for you.” You took out the printed essay and placed it on his desk.

He pushed his chair out, his eyes following your every move as he spread his legs. “Oh is that right?”

You took the invitation and took your reserved seat in his lap, linking your arms around his neck as you looked down at him. “Mhm, still want a good grade in this class you know. You are my favorite professor after all.”

He smirked smugly, licking his lips. “And you,” he kissed your lips before pulling away briefly, “Are my favorite girl.” He brought his hands up your back and pulled you into him as he kissed you again. This time, longer and deeper, wanting to feel you as much as possible. “Teased me so much in class today.” You smiled into the kiss and he continued, “Almost wanted to take you over my knee right there in front of everyone.”

You moaned audibly and he brought his hand up to your neck, gripping you softly but firmly, giving you room to pull away if you didn’t approve. When you leaned further into his grip, he grinned and pulled you closer. You started grinding down on him, basking in the desperate groans and sighs you were coaxing out of him, the way his movements became more frantic as he bucked into you.

After debating with yourself in your head for a moment––struggling to think properly with his hands all over you, you got off of his lap and smiled at the small whines of protest he let out before reaching for his belt. You made eye contact with him and noticed how wide his eyes were, hopeful, hungry, but hesitant.

His hands reached for yours, “You don’t have to, darling. If anything I should be doing this first. God knows I’ve thought about it.”

You pouted, trying your best to ignore his words and focus on the task at hand. “But I want to,” you kissed his cheek, “I wanna make you feel good, professor.” He nodded, barely able to speak.

“Yeah? You wanna be a good girl for me?”

You nodded eagerly, licking your lips as he pulled himself out of his trousers. “More than anything. Wanna make up for earlier.” You got down on your knees, mouth practically salivating at the way his member stood tall against his abdomen, his tip leaking with precum.

Your hand wrapped around him just as a knock sounded at the door. Professor?

The both of your eyes widened, the both of you looking around for some sort of answer before he ushered you under the desk, tucking himself back in hastily, pulling his chair as much as he could and sitting at the edge, hiding his unbuttoned and unbuckled pants. Luckily for the both of you, the back of the desk reached the floor, so whoever it was wouldn’t be able to see you hiding underneath. “Uh––Come in!”

The person walked in and you recognized the sound of her voice, she often spoke up in the lectures. You couldn’t remember her name, though. You do, however, remember that she often spoke up only to get Tom’s attention. You’d heard her gush about him in the halls just outside his class in the hopes of him hearing her. You couldn’t blame her, but the thought still irked you. “I just wanted to give you my paper. I hope it’s not too late.”

Tom checked the time on his watch, 7:58. “Nope,” he laughed breathlessly, trying to compose himself, “Not too late at all, in fact just in time.”

She handed her paper to Tom and he gave her a tight-lipped smile, trying his best not to think about the fact that your hands were trailing up his thighs and that he could feel your warm breath hitting the exposed part of his member––he really hadn’t payed attention when he tucked himself back in.

Before he could send the girl who’s name you still hadn’t remembered off, she took a seat across from him and he swallowed nervously, a little frustrated since he was so close to getting his cock in his girl’s mouth.

It seemed that you somehow read his thoughts because as soon as the girl kept talking for another two minutes, you pulled his member out and stroked him, licking up his shaft and he tensed, taking every ounce of self control he had not to look down at you. His hand reached down and held your cheek gently, just wanting to feel you. You nuzzled into his palm and he had to bite his lip to suppress his smile, not wanting the student across from him to think his endearing expression was meant for her.

You honestly completely tuned out all the words she was saying, your sole focus pleasuring Tom. But you didn’t miss the flirty and falsely innocent tone in her voice. You couldn’t see her but she was no doubt batting her eyelashes at him as well.

When she made a comment about how good his shirt looked on him, you couldn’t help yourself, you sucked his tip into your mouth with no warning, making him groan unexpectedly. You paused, eyes wide and playful as your mouth stayed around him.

“Are you okay professor?”

He let out a strained smile, “Yes, Emma, Sorry––” So her name was Emma. “I just uh banged my knee on the desk.”

She hummed a small okay and went on.

He caught your eye, trying his best to keep his expression neutral, but boy was it hard. Especially when you were looking up at him like that, with his cock in your mouth. You licked around his tip and lowered your mouth around him and he had to force himself to focus on the girl who was still talking to him.

You were not playing fair but quite frankly you didn’t care. You were making him feel good and yourself too. Your hand was pumping him, your tongue swirling around him as quietly as you could, while your other hand found its place between your thighs.

In the middle of Emma’s speech, Tom’s eyes drifted down and widened, his breath getting caught in his throat when he noticed your other hand, moving between your legs. He stuttered out an excuse, unable to tear his eyes away from you for a moment, “Uh, Emma I’m so sorry––I just have so much work to do, but feel free to come back––” he paused to swallow when you sucked harder around him in reaction to his invitation. “Come back next week if you have any problems or anything else you’d like to discuss.”

She hesitantly but respectfully said goodbye and was on her way, closing the door behind her.

Tom’s hands immediately shot down to hold your head, his mouth dropped open as he watched you, approaching his high. “Shit, that’s it darling that’s it. So fucking good for me.”

“I’m gonna cum––” he warned. You simply hummed around him and sped up your movements, feeling yourself clench as he panted, his hips bucking slightly as he came into your mouth. You unfortunately weren’t able to cum but you were sure there’d be other chances. You popped off of him and swallowed his load before licking up his length teasingly slow. “Fuck, such a good girl.”

He pulled his chair out and brought you up to stand between his legs, tiling his head to look up at you, his hands rubbing up and down the backs of your thighs absentmindedly. “Was someone a little jealous?”

You shrugged, trying to act nonchalant but failing to fix your annoyed facial expression. “Maybe.”

He tucked himself back into his pants and stood up, chuckling as he squeezed your cheek. “I’m yours.” He pecked your lips, before looking in your eyes, “And I’m most definitely repaying the favor when we get home. I mean––if you want to, of course.” Home.

You couldn’t help but smile, “Yeah––Okay.”

You’d never been to Tom’s house before so this felt like sort of a big deal to you, but you were going to try and calm your racing thoughts and heart. You and Tom agreed that you would go around the corner of the building for him to pick you up in his car, not wanting to risk anyone seeing you.

As soon as you were settled in, seatbelt on, Tom drove off and honestly the thrill of having to hide was exciting to the both of you. His hand was gripping your thigh throughout the whole drive and you could tell it was meant as a reminder that he was there for you, but also that he could barely contain himself.

Seeing Tom drive you, the flashing street lights illuminating his face, highlighting his jawline, his hand gripping your thigh––this was a sight you knew you wanted to see more. The intimacy of it all made you warm inside and the feeling of Tom’s fingertips digging into your skin only riled you up further.

You leaned over to kiss his cheek and he smiled at the feeling of your soft lips drifting over his skin. “Darling––” His words were cut off by a harsh moan when you trailed your lips down to his sweet spot, the noise almost too loud for the quiet, tense air in the car.

You teased, licked and bit at his skin, not afraid to leave marks. It was Friday now, if anyone saw them on Monday, they would just assume he’d had an eventful weekend. Honestly, the thought that no one would know that you were the one who left those marks excited you––it would be a secret between you and Tom, a thing for the two of you to share on your own.

Tom’s hands were now gripping the wheel and your thigh with force, trying to get his bearings. “You’re being very naughty today, love. Can’t say that I don’t love it though.”

You smiled sinfully into his neck, continuing your actions. Your hand slid over his thigh teasingly slow to rest on his bulge, fingers squeezing ever so softly and he practically jolted in his seat. “Christ––love unless you want me to crash this car I suggest you stop.”

You pulled away, satisfied with how much you’d riled him up. He almost whined at the loss of contact, subconsciously upset that you’d actually stopped. But as your hand reached back down to find its place between your thighs, his tone shifted.

“Don’t you dare touch what’s mine. That’s my job.”

You actually felt a shiver pass through your body and you squeezed your thighs together at the sound of his dominant voice, excited for what was to come.

When you made it to his apartment, you barely had time to take in the scenery and take off your shoes and jackets before he dragged you to his room. But from what you saw, the decor was simple but elegant, much like Tom. His bedroom was the same, but again, you weren’t too focused on it.

He turned on the dim light in his room, wanting to be able to see you as he pleased you. He stepped closer to you and placed his hands on your waist, looking deep into your eyes. “You still want this?”

You nodded absolutely certain. “Want you to take me.”

His pupils dilated and he pulled your shirt up and over your head, licking his lips, eyes widening when he noticed what you were wearing and you couldn’t help but smile.

“Christ, were you wearing this all day?”

You nodded again. “The underwear’s matching too. Wanna see?”

He got down on his knees, a teasing but desperate tone to his voice. “You’re a smart girl, don’t ask stupid questions.” He unbuttoned your pants and pulled them down along with your socks, mouth dropping open as he got to see the full set.

You ran your hands up and down your body teasingly as he stood up. “Do you like it?”

He shook his head, smiling in disbelief, “Again with the silly questions, love.” He leaned in to kiss you, pulling away to take off his clothes. “You look like a goddess, darling.” You could feel your skin heating up from his words and his stare. He pulled you in for another kiss before bringing you onto the bed.

You lied down in the middle and spread your legs, waiting for him eagerly as he lied down between them. “Can’t fucking wait to taste you, love.”

He pulled your panties over to the side and licked into you, his tongue softly swiping through your folds. His eyes rolled back as he moaned into you, “Taste just as perfect as you look.” He slid his hands around your thighs and pulled you in closer, smiling at the small squeak you let out.

His tongue was exploring you, finding all the spots and all the tricks that made your toes curl and your breath hitch. He was keeping this all to memory, memorizing the way you feel, the way you look. When your breaths quickened and your fingers tugged at his curls, he locked his arm around your stomach, slid one, then two fingers inside of you and sped up his movements, moving his head from side to side as he hummed onto your clit.

Your body tensed and you held onto him for dear life as the knot in your stomach gave out, the pleasure spreading all throughout your body. Your mouth dropped open in ecstasy, your neck craning back and Tom couldn’t look away from you. You looked like a painting and he wanted to commit it to memory.

He let go of you and kissed his way up your body, soothing you with his lips. Your legs were still twitching slightly, your stomach clenching and unclenching when his kisses reached your cheek. “Look so pretty when you come for me.” He kissed along your jaw, “Can’t believe you’ve deprived me of such a beautiful sight for so long.” He kissed your lips and tugged your bottom one between his teeth, before looking at you, eyes wide, “You gonna give me the privilege of seeing it again?”

You smiled, your hands coming up to hold his cheeks. “You can see it whenever you want. As long as you’re the one making it happen.” You pulled him to you and kissed him, the both of you moaning into the small gaps between your mouths.

He started to pull away but you whined and pulled him back making him smile. “I’ve gotta get a condom, love.”

He tried to get up again but you pulled him back down, “M’on the pill Tommy.” You looked up at him, pouting and he almost gasped––the effect you had on him was insane. “Just fuck me please.”

He didn’t need anymore convincing, grabbing a hold of his cock and swiping it through your folds, groaning out loud at how good your wetness felt. You bucked your hips and realizing you were getting desperate, he finally slid into you and all your senses immediately tuned into him.

Just like your dream––All of your senses were in overdrive. All you could feel were the hands tracing every curve of your body, playing you like a toy they’d made themselves. All you could hear was that sweet, rough voice telling you praises and calling you endearing names as your whole body shivered from the pleasure.

His eyes were watching your face, taking you in as he thrusted into you, making sure you were enjoying everything he was giving you. You felt absolutely amazing and so did he. “So perfect for me, darling. That’s it.” He bit his lip and sped up, making your jaw drop as you stared into his eyes, completely open and vulnerable to him. His touch was tantalizing, even better than your fantasies which only meant you’d become more addicted to him and what he could do to you.

He grunted, angling his hips when he found your spot, hitting it over and over, bringing his hand down to play with your clit. “Told you I wanted to see you cum again, pretty girl. So you’re gonna cum then I’m gonna fill you up. That sound okay?”

You nodded eagerly, eyes watching his every move as your hands gripped his arms, your thighs burning invitingly as they stretched around him with every thrust. Then you uttered that one word that always had him almost inappropriately weak for you. “Want to be full of you, professor.”

His jaw slacked and he paused for a slight moment before picking up his pace, faster than before, hips chasing after both your highs, fingers still rubbing you just the way he learned, just the way you liked. “Fuck-–”

A few more thrusts and flicks of his wrist and you were tensing under him, your pussy clenching around him as he let out broken curses and moans, losing his rhythm and releasing into you with a groan.

He rested some of his weight on you for a moment, the both of you smiling and laughing breathlessly as you took in the moment. Your hands came up to play with his curls and he sighed, leaning into your touch. He lowered his head into the crook of your neck and left a few soft kisses, coaxing some sighs from you as well.

After a moment, he rolled over and took you with him, making you nuzzle further into him, his arm wrapped around you, your leg slung over his waist. His hand was rubbing up to your ass and down to your thigh, lulling you to sleep while simultaneously riling you up again.

He kissed your forehead and you kissed his chest in response. “That was fucking amazing, love.”

You nodded and hummed in agreement, “Even better than my dreams.”

He pulled back to look at you, you could hear his heartbeat quicken and you tried to hide your face in his chest. “You had dreams about this too?”

That made you lift your head up to look at him. You could see in his eyes that he wasn’t joking but you were still slightly shocked. “Too?”

He smiled, licking his lips, “Well maybe we should discuss them, and try them out for ourselves.” His hand found its way between your legs again, making you moan but that didn’t stop you from responding.

You nodded, “For research purposes, of course.”

“Of course.” He grinned, “See, I knew I taught you well.” He leaned in to kiss you deeply, “My girl’s the perfect student.”

You spent hours exploring each other's bodies as you reenacted your dreams, both exceeding each other's expectations every time. By the time you fell asleep in each other's arms, it was late at night and you were sweaty, and tired, but overwhelmingly pleased.

❊❊❊❊

The next Friday, it was halloween. Liz had somehow convinced you to go to a halloween party with her. On top of that it was a frat party. And even worse, you dressed up as a school girl because it was all last minute and you didn’t have any time to get a costume.

“Oh come on Y/N, you look hot!”

You turned in the full length mirror to look at your ass that was almost visible in this mini skirt. “You think so?”

“Duh.”

And that’s all the convincing you needed to go out. You needed a little college fun. You hadn’t been to a party in who knows how long because you were always focusing on your work. You deserved this. Also Liz said it was a celebration of your “lay”, yes, she said lay.

“I’m just saying you cannot let me get with him again.”

“Liz it’s literally his frat house that we’re going to and we both know you have little to no self control.”

“Well damn. You couldn’t have sugar coated it?”

“What, you want me to throw a packet of splenda on you?” You joked.

She shoved you, “Dude shut up,” she laughed.

You looked down at your bare thighs that were only partly covered by your thigh high socks and rubbed your arms, regretting not bringing a jacket when Liz spoke up again. “Oh shit, is that Professor Holland?”

Your eyes shot up and made direct eye contact with him. He was wearing a hoodie and some sweats but he still looked great as usual. His eyes trailed down your body and soon your shivers were no longer because of the cold.

“I’ll just wait here.” Liz said suggestively and you walked over to Tom.

“H–Hi.”

He put his hands in his pockets to stop himself from reaching out to touch you, he didn’t know who was around. “Well hello to you too.” He looked into your eyes, a smirk on his face. You rubbed your arms quickly for warmth, and Tom had to control himself to not look at your chest, even though he could see your nipples hardening from the weather through your shirt. He wanted nothing more than to hold you in his arms and take you home.

“Any plans?” You asked.

“No, I'm just about to go home. I’m uh guessing you have somewhere to be?” His eyes traced your figure again.

“Yeah um me and Liz are going to a frat party.” You pointed back to your friend and gave him a small smile and shrug. “She convinced me.”

He wanted to kiss you so bad but he had to restrain himself.

“Be safe tonight, yeah?” His eyes were comforting, as they always were, but this felt almost more personal? Almost like he didn’t want you to go. And honestly, after seeing him, you almost didn’t want to either. You never defined your relationship with him, so honestly right now he was like a friend with benefits––professor with benefits, if you will.

You nodded, licking your lips nervously. “O––Okay. I will. You be safe too!”

His eyes followed you as you walked off, your friend pulling you along, obviously whispering to you, probably about him. You looked so fucking good and everyone else was going to see that too. It’s not like he owned you or anything, but part of him really wished he could claim you, openly care for you and be affectionate. His thoughts were a mix of wholesome and raunchy and he had no idea how to act.

He almost felt wrong but he couldn’t get the thoughts out of his mind, the way you looked up at him sheepishly, the innocent look in your eyes while you were wearing that mini skirt. His cock was bulging in his boxers ever since he first laid eyes on you. When he got home, he made his way to his bed, undressing almost immediately. Lying down in the middle of the bed, just where you were days before brought a flood of memories into his mind, only making his member throb even more. He tugged at his cock, spitting in his hand to make it slick.

Images of you were flashing in his mind as he sped up his movements, desperate for a release.

He was dying to get a taste of you again. The memory of the way you felt under his fingertips, the way your muscles clenched when he hit the right spots. The way you tasted when you were dripping onto his tongue. The way you looked at him when you came, your lips parted to release broken moans and whimpers. The way your fingers gripped his curls as your body tensed. It was all enough to make him spill over his hand, his breaths coming out in quick pants as his head dropped back onto the pillow.

“Fuck.” He really had it bad for you.

❊❊❊❊

Tom had texted you during class on Tuesday to meet him in his office when you were done with classes for the day. When you stepped into the room, he locked the door immediately, bringing you over to his desk, his lips chasing yours. Screw worrying about people hearing you, he wanted you. Now.

“God, just seeing you in that tight little costume––you have no idea how badly I wanted to ravish you. The thought of all those dumb frat boys seeing you in all your glory like that––I was absolutely beside myself.” So that’s what this was about. His hand came up to hold your cheek, his eyes fiercely staring into yours and you nuzzled into his touch, your hand holding his wrist softly and his eyes softened at the sight of you.

“I’m gonna absolutely devour you.” You gasped and he smiled, pulling your pants along with panties down. He sat you down on his desk and got down on his knees, licking his lips. “As soon as I got a taste of you, I knew I wouldn’t be able to go without it ever again.” He kissed your thigh, looking up at you. “You gonna let me have a taste again? Wanna make you feel good, lovie.”

You nodded, swallowing roughly, “Y––Yeah. Yes please.”

He chuckled breathlessly, “Such a polite little thing you are.” He kissed his way from your inner thigh to your center before licking a torturously slow stripe from your hole to your clit. You let out a sigh and gripped the desk, your fingertips becoming lighter at how hard you were already holding it.

His hands held your thighs open, putting them over his shoulders, holding you in place. His tongue was languidly licking you up and down, savoring your taste and your moans, coaxing them out of you one by one, nonstop. He looked up at you and your breath got caught in your throat, the look in his eyes fierce, almost as if he could see your bare soul and he clearly liked what he saw. He brought his lips to close around your heat after every other swipe of his tongue, passionately kissing your heat.

“So fucking good, angel. Always the best for me.”

You nodded, licking your lips, one of your hands coming to grab at his curls, making him growl into you. “Only for you, Tommy.”

He didn’t stop his tongue or his lips until you came, your back arching, fingers frantically grabbing for whatever you could hold, lip trapped between your teeth to muffle the moans that so desperately wanted to escape into the quiet air of the room. He kept going until you had to pull his head away from you, overwhelmed by all the pleasure and scared that you would scream and alert everyone in the building about what you were up to.

His hands were caressing your thighs, eyes looking at you in awe, almost too innocently for what you’d just done. He stood up between your legs and leaned in to kiss you, letting you taste yourself on his tongue and his lips.

He pulled away to look at you, hands holding your hips as your legs wrapped around his waist. You brought your arms up to link around his neck, looking up at him appreciatively and absolutely spent. “So do you think I should wear school girl outfits more often?”

He laughed, his hands holding you tighter, “If you do, my head is never leaving between your thighs.”

You smiled cheekily, batting your lashes at him. “Promise?”

He’d never gotten down on his knees quicker in his life. Let’s just say it took you another hour before you left his office.

❊❊❊❊

Over the past few weeks it had become a routine for you to go over to Tom’s office to seemingly “work on your assignments and review,” so it wasn’t out of the ordinary for you to show up unannounced Friday afternoon. Without meaning to, though, it seemed you showed up a little too early, and ended up overhearing part of Tom and Harrison’s conversation.

“I can tell Y/N means a lot to you, mate. Don’t lie.” Your heart dropped to your stomach as you skidded just in front of the door, about to turn the corner inside. You backed up and stayed pressed to the wall. Luckily no one really stopped by this side of the building at this time on a Friday, so no one would find you snooping around in the middle of the hallway.

“No I just––”

No. He said no––Okay you weren’t going to freak out. This always happens in the movies, and then the main character runs away before hearing the most important part and they overreact. So you decided to just...wait it out.

So you waited and waited. And the more the silence overwhelmed you, the louder it got. You could feel the tears starting to form in your eyes because you really thought your feelings were mutual. But just as you inched your foot backwards to walk away, he spoke up again, his voice quiet.

“She means everything to me, man. I––It scares me, honestly. I just don’t want to mess it up.”

This time the tears fully formed in your eyes, but for the absolute opposite reason. You smiled and wiped at your eyes, not even bothering to hide anymore as you turned the corner, surprising Tom, his eyes widening as he took in your appearance. Harrison turned around to see you and his gaze filled with concern as well.

“Tom––” your voice was quiet but there was a smile on your face.

“Darling––” He rushed over to you and grabbed your hands, wiping your cheeks with his thumbs to catch the few tears that escaped. “What’s wrong, are you alright?”

Your hands came up to hold his wrists as you looked into his eyes, “I heard you talking.”

His face dropped in realization and he could feel his heart pounding in his chest.

Harrison cleared his throat and subtly made his way out, “You guys have some things to discuss.” He put a hand on your shoulder and you both smiled at each other appreciatively before he walked out, shutting the door behind him.

Tom took your hands and brought you over to the couch. “I hope I didn’t scare you off, love.”

You shook your head immediately, even climbing in his lap to prove him wrong and he smiled gratefully. “No! It’s just that we never really talked, you know, about us.” He nodded and you took that as a sign to continue, enjoying the way his hands subconsciously slipped under your shirt to rub at your skin soothingly. “I like you Tom, obviously. But I like you a lot.” You linked your hands behind his neck. “I think I might be falling for you.”

His eyes started tearing up as well, as he smiled, “Yeah well, I think I’ve already fallen for you, darling.”

You looked into his eyes and your smile brightened, “Okay maybe I lied––I’ve definitely already fallen for you as well.”

You both laughed lovingly, pulling each other in for a sweet kiss.“Look,” Tom started, licking his lips. “I don’t know what this means for our future, but all I know is I don’t plan on letting you go any time soon.”

You kissed his lips softly, “Well I don’t plan on leaving any time soon either.”

“Good.” He looked at you and you felt as though your soul was out and open for him to hold and love. “Cause you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me, Y/N and I don’t ever want to lose you.”

You could feel your eyes tearing up again. This felt good. This felt like home.

#tom holland #tom holland x reader #tom holland imagine #tom holland oneshot #tom holland fic #tom holland fluff #tom holland smut #professor!tom holland #professor!tom holland x reader #tom holland angst #for a sec tho lol #professor!tom holland imagine #professor!tom holland fic #professor!tom holland oneshot #professor!tom holland smut #professor!tom holland angst #professor!tom holland fluff

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yoonmiined · 7 years

Text

My Friend is an Angel | Chapter 2

Title: Smiles and Laughs

Genre: fluff, angst

Word count: 2k

JIMIN’S POV:

As Taehyung and I jog around the campus for our daily routine, a sudden thought crosses my mind.

“Ah, that’s right. We have an exam tomorrow morning” I think aloud

“Shit! I totally forgot about it! Agh...I’m totally going to fail…” Taehyung complains before coming to a slow stop to catch his breath, and as the realization sets in his head falls down slowly in defeat.

Noticing this, I stop right beside him to catch my breath and look at Taehyung while I give him a soft pat on his back.

“Aish, don’t say stuff like that. You’ll do well as long as you have been working on your research paper.”

“You see, that’s the problem. I’ve been playing Overwatch this whole week that I didn’t even touch the research paper. Why do you think I’ve been waking up late?”

A big sigh goes through my lips before bluntly stating: “*Sigh*...you’re screwed”

A pout comes from his lips and looks at me just as a puppy looks at it’s owner for a treat.

“Ahh..why is this happening to me??!”

“Hahaha, so cute. I was just joking, Tae. You are pretty smart so you’ll do fine.”

Seeing him act like a little kid, I couldn’t help but let out a small laugh and give him a tiny pinch on his nose.

Taehyung would sometimes act like a little kid, and I’d find that a very cute, although sometimes annoying, side of him. Whenever he needed help or just wanted attention, he would pout and give you his puppy eyes making you feel guilty but soft at the same time that you couldn’t help but help the poor kid.

“No, but I want to get a higher score than you!”

“You are still thinking of beating my rank in the class?” I scoff at his sudden reply.

“Hell yeah! I want to stop paying every time we go to the PC cafe. Also I want to stop paying for the snacks you eat all the time at the cafe, Jimin”

“Hahaha, alright alright. Let’s head back to the dorms and shower. I’ll help you study for the exam”

“Really??!! YES! Thank you Jimin~ You’re the best!”

Following his excited reply he puts both of his hands on my shoulders and pulls me into a tight hug. I laugh at his reaction as the both of us, with a big smile on our faces, head back to our dorms.

The last bell finally rings and both Taehyung and I head out of class to go grab some snacks from the store outside the campus.

‘Well I have to help Tae cram as much as he can, so we’ll probably be staying out late.’ I think to myself before continuing, ‘I should probably buy some snacks.’ Finishing my thought. Afterwards taking a quick glance at him I realize… ‘He eats… a lot. Better buy a lot of snacks.’

‘Maybe grab some shrimp chips, choco pies, and rice crackers while I get some poky, and some cookies.’ I list in my head before repeating it to the snack vendor.

“Can we get mochi ice cream too?” Asked Taehyung with tiny sparks in his eyes, clearly wanted to have some ice cream.

“Sure. Let’s get strawberry mochi, they’re my favorite. We can eat it on our way back to the dorms.”

Hearing this the snack vendor takes out a box of strawberry flavored mochi ice cream, he hands out all the snacks that he chose and after I pay, we start to walk back with arms full of heavenly snacks.

On our way back, we open the box of the mochi ice scream and start munching on the soft and chewy snack. I lick my lips every time I take a bite of the amazingly powdery snack. Taehyung starts humming and smiles with every bite he takes clearly enjoying the ice cream.

“Oh?” Taehyung stops and looks closely at the mochi on his hand.

“What’s wrong?” I ask Taehyung.

We stop walking and he then turns to look at me with a thoughtful expression, then looks back to the mochi, then back to me, and to the mochi again. Now putting the mochi next to my face, he squints his eyes and keeps looking at the mochi on his hand and me. Taehyung, staring at me lets out a small chuckle, few seconds later it turns into a loud laughter with a pure smile. Being clueless of what he is thinking I look at him with a puzzled expression.

“What?? Why are you laughing??

“Hahaha...this-this..reminds me of you..HAHAHA”

Struggling, Taehyung finally answers me on why he is laughing. Being a bit surprised, a bit baffled, I let out a small laugh which then forms into a louder one. I can’t believe Tae just compared me with a mochi. Still laughing I ask him:

“What do you mean it reminds you of me?”

“Well, this mochi is small like you, your cheeks are as soft, squishy, and pink as pink mochi, so it reminds me of you.”

“Aish, this kid.” I mutter under my breath before finishing, “Who are you calling small, huh?? Just because I’m a few centimeters shorter than you doesn’t mean I’m small!”

I grab Taehyung by his neck and put him in a headlock while I ruffle his soft brown hair.

“Hahaha, you’re not only small, your hands are small too haha! You have small baby hands hahaha”

“Shut up Tae!” I retort by elbowing him in the ribs.

“Hahaha, okay okay I’ll stop...let’s go back quickly so you can help me then” He finishes

“Alright. Next time you are buying snack for calling me small” I finish with a slight pout to my lips.

Releasing him from the headlock, we began to walk back to our school dorms and continue to eat the ice cream with joy.

“Okay. That looks good! We’re done studying” I tell Taehyung stretching both arms up.

“Really? That was all? That was actually not that bad”

“Of course. It’s just that you decided to procrastinate and play Overwatch instead” I state blankly

“Shut up, you procrastinate too! It’s just that I procrastinate more...anyways, do you want to go play video games?” He asks me.

Taehyung is the type to study for 2 hours and then play videogames or watch videos for 8 hours straight then forget about his responsibilities. Sometimes he would write 3 words on his essays then take a 5 hours break on the computer but in the end he would forget about his paper and go to sleep without finishing it or even starting it… He really is something else.

“Ah...I have work in 10 minutes, sorry Tae” I tell Taehyung with a bit of guilt in my voice. I know that he really likes to play games, and he enjoys playing them more if we’re playing with him.

“Mm, okay. It’s fine Jimin, really. Go now, you are going to be late, hurry go!” Taehyung tells me while pushing me out the door.

“Okay okay, I’m leaving now haha I’ll see you after I’m done working, bye Tae!”

“Yes, yes goodbye Jimin~”

A few minutes later

Taehyung’s POV:

Since I don’t have work today, I go lay down on my bed and look at the ceiling while listening to some music. I’m pretty bored without Jimin here. I usually play games or watch TV when he goes to work, but for some reason today I just don’t have the energy to play games or do anything. It’s as if whenever I’m with Jimin, I have energy for everything. It’s as if I were a flower and Jimin my sun. The sun that every flower needs in order to grow, to bloom, to live.

I check my phone to look at the time and it reads 3:50PM. It has been an hour and some minutes since Jimin left. I look up from my phone to stare at the alstroemerias sitting on top of the desk. I get up grabbing a water bottle sitting next to the flowers and feed them some water then I go back to my original position. With every second that passes as I look at the beautiful flowers, the more I yearn for Jimin.

“I should go visit Jimin since I have nothing else to do right now” I tell myself.

I go to my contacts and send a message to Jimin. ‘Meet me in 15 minutes at the north park’

With that, I grab my sweater, keys, phone and wallet and head out to the park.

It takes me shorter than I thought to walk to the park. I arrive there at 3:59PM, one minute before 4 o’clock. My favorite time of the day. I sit on a bench and wait.

It’s finally 4 o’clock, and I wait there, for my best friend to come. I hear some birds singing beautifully joined with some childrens’ laughters.

“Where are you?”

I ask myself as I sit on the bench. The sun getting ready to go to sleep, it sets little by little. The light blue and light orange slowly turning into a dark blue color. I wait there, for my best friend to come. The wind blowing, going through the thin fabric of my sweater tearing away the warmth from my arms and chest. The cool, light wind giving my body chills. I close my eyes to let the wind embrace me. I take in a deep breath smelling the grassy plants and the white chrysanthemum.

“Oh, Taehyung!”

A familiar voice breaks my endless thoughts. I look to see where that voice came from. It’s Jimin. The friend I’ve been waiting for.

“Sorry, did you wait long?” Jimin asks

“No, not really. I was just thinking a bit, and looking at the sky” I reply

He sits next to me on the bench. We both take a few minutes to contemplate the graceful and calm evening. We keep staring at the sky for a few more minutes then Jimin breaks the silence

“So...is there something you want to tell me for you to call me here?”

“Uh, not really haha. I guess I was pretty bored. Also, the weather is nice today so I just wanted to spend the evening outside”

I answer Jimin rubbing the back of my neck and look down at my feet with a shy smile. I turn to look at Jimin who is already staring at me with that delicate bright smile that only he has.

“Haha, so you just wanted to hang out?” He questions.

“Yeah, just hang out haha” I say, but for some reason this time my voice wavering a bit

“Alright. Well let’s just enjoy the nice view of the sky” He says and looks up to the sky still smiling. His eyes were sparkling just like the stars up in the sky. His cheeks have a slight pink tinge on them just like the light pink that paints the sky at the end of the day.

I really just wanted to hang out with Jimin because I was bored and missed him slightly, but now with him by my side, multiple thoughts start to appear in my mind. All of them about Jimin.

Some of the thoughts were how happy and glad I am to have someone like Jimin in my life. The sheer happiness he gives me is immeasurable. I’m glad to have the opportunity to sit next to him like this and appreciate the calm evening. Glad that we get to fool around and play games together. Glad that we get to go to the same university, and live in the same dorm. Glad to see his pure and angelic smile and hear his laugh everyday. Glad to be best friends with him. Glad that we met. If there were words to justify how glad I am just to have him by my side, I would say them… but in the end I am just truly glad Jimin exists.

A/N: Hello guys! I really hope you guys enjoyed this chapter as well :) Since this is longer than last chapter it took me a bit longer and I also started school again (ugh lol) so I didn’t have as much time. I also want to thank one of my friends (polar bear) for helping me editing this story, thank you so much! Next chapter will be up soon, so please keep reading~

#bts #bangtan #bangtan boys #bangtansonyeondan #bts fanfic #bts jimin #bts v #bts park jimin #bts kim taehyung #vmin fanfic #vmin #park jimin #kim taehyung #bts yoongi #bts suga #yoonmin fanfic #yoonmin

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thedefinitionofbts · 7 years

Text

Our First and Last (Ch. 6)

Ch. 1 | Ch. 2 | Ch. 3 | Ch. 4 | Ch. 5 | Ch. 6 | Ch. 7 | Ch. 8 | Ch. 9 | Ch. 10 |

Ch. 11 | Ch. 12 (Final)

Pairings: Jeon Jungkook x Reader (MAIN) | Park Jimin x Kim Taehyung | Jung Hoseok x Min Yoongi | Kim Namjoon x Kim Seokjin

Genre: Angst, Fluff, Soulmate Au, Scifi

Words: 3K

You were walking out of your fourth session with Dr. Kim, overall feeling the same as always, but one thing had really sparked your interest this time around.

This had been one of the most eventful sessions you’ve ever had, and it had nothing to do with the session itself. For one, Dr. Park had randomly burst into the room and you found out Dr. Kim likes to call him “Jiminie”. Two, it was the first time you ever saw Dr. Park, the guy who supposedly runs the clinic with Dr. Kim, and three, he happened to mention a new patient that sounded awfully like the famous researcher Hoseok showed you the other day.

You quietly close the door to Dr. Kim’s office as you leave, feeling the curiosity and hoard of thoughts and questions making their way into your head.

MD-PhD neurosurgeon named Dr. Jeon…. Could it be?

Overwhelmed by the thought of it and unable to contain the growing need to share this new information with someone, you quickly pull your phone out of your pocket and message the one person you thought of.

You: hobi, you won’t BELIEVE what just happened at the clinic

J-Hobi: some guy ran out naked and puked all over the floor????

You: what? NO! how is that the first thing you think of?

J-Hobi: LOL jk jk so what happened?

You: so that famous neuroscientist/surgeon guy might be the new patient at the clinic i go to. heard one of the psychologists mention a dr. jeon today

J-Hobi: dr. jeon jungkook? no way. there are plenty of doctors named jeon, it could just be a coincidence.

You: sure there could be lots of jeons, but how many md-phd neurosurgeons named dr. jeon! think about it man.

J-Hobi: …..i mean, yeah that’s a good point…..but he can’t possibly be struggling with depression, can he?

You: idk who knows….

“Good Morning Dr. Jeon” Jimin cheerfully greets Jungkook for the first time, despite seeing the obvious look of annoyance plastered over the neurosurgeon’s face. It wasn’t exactly what the psychologist had looked forward to upon opening the door, but he knew Jungkook had agreed to enter the clinic against his own will.

He had at least hoped an MD-PhD neurosurgeon would be more professional when it came to psychological therapy, but apparently even that was too much to ask.

“Do you have any specific goals for your treatment?” Jimin asks, after going through the list of basic questions in which Jungkook had half-heartedly replied with either one-worded answers to or just straight up bs-ed.

“Cut the crap. You know I’m only doing this for Yoongi” Jungkook finally says, after having enough of what he deemed as a “complete waste of his time”. He looks at the pink haired psychologist, eyeing his motions and scoffing every time he would pick up his pen to jot down notes.

“Right” Jimin sighs and nods his head, thinking this is going to be exponentially harder than he had anticipated.

There’s a knock on the door, and Jimin almost lets out a sigh of relief, knowing that, at least for a brief moment, Jungkook’s judgmental glare would stop shooting arrows at his soul.

“Come in” Jimin says, as he looks at the door, praying that it was Taehyung on the other side.

He feels another rush of relief as he sees the golden skinned psychologist peak his head in.

“Oh, is this not a good time?” Taehyung says when he sees Jungkook sitting across from Jimin, legs crossed and hands inside his pockets.

“Ummm” Jimin wants to say no, this is perfect timing, but obviously that wasn’t an option because of the clinic’s policy.

“It’s fine. I’m done here anyways.” Jungkook says, standing up, grabbing his trench coat, and walking out of the room. After he closes the door to Jimin’s office, Taehyung turns back to Jimin, with a questioning look spread across his face.

“Was that…?”

Jimin nods and covers his face with his hands.

“Applications are due soon!” Hoseok shouts as he runs into the library toward the table you were sitting at, with all your textbooks and notes spread out in a messy array as if a tornado had just swept through the area.

“Shhh, Hobi, people are studying” You whisper sharply, while looking around to see if people are disturbed by the noise, luckily everyone is too busy cramming. Hoseok gives you an apologetic look and sits down in the chair next to you.

“Have you applied yet?” Hoseok asks.

You nod. “Yeah, I turned my application in yesterday” You answer, thinking about how long it took for you to write a descent cover letter and brush up your resume.

“Have you?” You turn to Hoseok, whose lips have formed a wide smile.

“Nope” He says.

“What?! You didn’t apply?” Now it’s his turn to remind you to be quieter in the library. “But you’re the one who was so into his research, and now you’re not applying?”

“Yeah, so I thought about it for the past couple of weeks and realized I’m more drawn to the thought of caring for patients, so I’m just going to apply for medical school instead.” Hoseok explains.

“Well, I’m mean, you could do the whole MD-PhD program.”

“Are you kidding? Medical school is hard enough as it is, do you want me to die?!”

You laugh at his over the top response.

“Just be glad I’m dropping out of the game so your chances have gone up” Hoseok says grinning slyly.

“But were you really much of a competition to begin with?” You joke, earning you a playful punch in the arm by Hoseok.

“Well, anyways, I’m going to leave you to your studying. Keep that GPA up now,” He reminds you as he walks out of the library.

You had been reading for a little over three hours before the words on the page of your textbook start to fade out of focus, like your brain was refusing to absorb any more information. You look out the large glass windows of the library for a few minutes and see that it was a nice sunny afternoon. Some students had even opted to study outside, which looks really appealing right about now. You didn’t want to carry all your stuff outside, so you decide to just take a brief walk around campus and come back to study some more later.

You walk across the courtyard of the library and continue along the path that extends to the duck pond where students liked to go to feed their expired bread to the different species of birds around there. It was late afternoon, and despite the dense arbors of the trees that lined the path, the warm hues of the sunlight shone through the gaps in the leaves, casting mosaic shadows on the sidewalk. The sky was clear, so blue it looked like a painting and there was a gentle breeze that was barely strong enough to lift strands of your hair.

When you reach the duck pond, you notice that there aren’t as many students as there normally are, most likely due to the infamous finals week that signaled pending doom for most students who liked to procrastinate and cram a semester’s worth of knowledge into one week or even one night. There was, however, a girl, sitting on a bend at the edge of the pond, reading a book, and some older couples feeding the ducks.

You walk around the pond, watching the geese wobble around the grass and two swans, swimming elegantly on the surface of the dark water; one was porcelain white and the other was a deep cool-toned black. You were just about to turn your head to look at another part of the pond, when you stumble on an uneven part of the sidewalk. Losing your footing, you almost fall flat on your face, but someone catches you just in time.

“Careful there, are you ok?” You hear a familiar deep voice ask, as the man catches you before you hit the ground.

“Oh Sorry” You apologize while looking up and seeing the familiar handsome face of Dr. Kim Taehyung, your primary psychologist, staring down at you in surprise.

“Y/N?”

“Dr. Kim? Wha-What are you doing here?”

Your astonished expression must’ve seemed way too over the top, because Dr. Kim just laughs. This was the first time you had bumped into him outside the clinic, which also entailed the first time seeing him in normal clothes and without glasses. He was wearing a pale salmon colored button up that was tucked into his black slacks, and his cologne with vanilla hints was extra noticeable in contrast to the faint musky smell of the great outdoors.

“I’m waiting for Jimin” He says, before realizing he’s just casually addressed Dr. Park by his first name. He feels slightly awkward, but decides since it’s not working hours that there’s no need to be so formal.

“I see.”

“This is your university right?” Taehyung asks.

“Yeah, I’m taking a study break.”

He nods.

“So do you guys meet up here often?” You ask, wondering why they chose to come here of all places.

Taehyung chuckles and looks down at his feet for a moment. “We come here on this day every year.” He says. “It was where we first met, back when we were students here.”

“Oh, this is your alma mater?” You ask, surprised to find out this new piece of information.

He nods again.

“Taehyung!”

You hear someone call Dr. Kim’s name from behind him, and soon you see the pale pink hair of the petite psychologist pop up from behind as he jumps on Taehyung’s back, unaware that you were standing in front of him.

“Oh, Y/N, I didn’t see you there” Jimin says when he spots you. He quickly hops off of Taehyung, and puts his hands in his pockets, composing himself again.

“Hi, uh, Dr. Park” You say, nervously waving at him.

“Ehhh, feel free to call me Jimin. We’re not in the clinic, and we don’t have a patient-doctor relationship anyways.” Jimin says, giving you a smile.

You notice Taehyung give Jimin a wide-eyed look, perhaps warning him that they still have to be somewhat professional, but Jimin shrugs it off.

“So Y/N, has Taehyung told you about this place yet?”

“Yeah, he was sort of explaining that”

“I told her about us meeting here and attending university” Taehyung cuts in, probably before Jimin could blurt out too much.

“I mean, it wasn’t our first, first meeting-“

“Jimin!” Taehyung cuts him off.

Jimin looks at Taehyung giving him a nervous, apologetic smile. He always wore his heart on his sleeve, and was never good at keeping secrets or being confidential for that matter.

“Anyways, we’re going to see a movie later, if you want to come” Jimin says, trying to change the topic after noticing Taehyung’s change in expression.

“Uh thanks, but I have to get back to studying. You guys have a nice day!” You say hurriedly, as you wave and begin walking back to the library. You didn’t want to barge in on anymore of their privacy or take up more of their time.

After you had distanced yourself from the pair, you turn back to see if Jimin and Taehyung are still there. You faintly see their figures in the distance, walking side-by-side and holding hands. Although you can’t physically see it from where you are, you can perfectly imagine the boxy smile on Taehyung’s face and Jimin’s eyes that were probably forming half moons by now as they enjoy their little date of sorts.

They always seemed like a couple with an interesting story, and you were glad they decided to share a small piece of it with you today.

“Jungkook-ah, I’ve looked through all the applications for you, but you’re ultimately going to have to be the one to decide which of these recent graduates you want to accept into your lab.” Yoongi says, as he walks into Jungkook’s office. The latter was busy writing up another project proposal for funding his latest research. There were a pile of papers stacked on his desk, and an old cup of coffee that had gone cold ages ago.

“How many did you narrow it down to?” Jungkook asks, slowly spinning around in his seat and turning his attention to the med student, who happens to be his close friend from college and doing clinical rotations at the hospital he works at.

“There were a total of 520 applications, and I managed to narrow it down to 27” Yoongi explains. “I mean, I could cut it down more, but I thought you might want to take a look at these yourself.”

Jungkook nods. “Very well” He signals for Yoongi to place the pile of applications in the empty clearing on his desk.

“How’s the proposal coming along?”

“Good.”

Yoongi nods, his lips forming a line as he fights the urge to ask about Jungkook’s visits to the psychology clinic, knowing that the neurosurgeon despises talking about it.

“Thank you, Yoongi” Jungkook suddenly says, surprising the humble assistant. “You’ve saved me a lot of time filtering through all those applications. I don’t know what I would do without you.”

Yoongi feels a brush of warmth spread through his chest. It wasn’t everyday that Jungkook would express his gratitude so openly, but whenever he did, it always felt extra special.

“Hey man, no prob” Yoongi says as he pats Jungkook on the shoulder and walks out, leaving the genius to go back to work.

“Hobi, you won’t believe what just happened” You say as you walk into the coffee shop where Hoseok has his head buried in his Organic Chemistry II textbook. He looked like a mess. The dark circles around his eyes was something you weren’t used to seeing on a daily basis, but being the biochemistry major he is, looking like a panda around finals week was the norm.

“Patient Dr. Jeon is MD-PhD Dr. Jeon?” Hoseok lifts his head, eyelids droopy but opening fully as he sees you walking toward the table by the window he was sitting at. There’s a faint coffee stain on his white t-shirt and what looks to be a drool mark on the side of his mouth running down his chin.

“Well I still don’t know about that, but this is even better”

Hoseok raises an eyebrow, not knowing what kind of exciting news you were about to break to him.

“I got accepted!” You shout as you pull out the letter that came in the mail that day.

“Whhhaaaaa!!!!” Hoseok’s face immediately lights up, and it was like his dark circles just disappeared. “This calls for a celebration!” Hoseok says all giddily, forgetting about the test that’ll determine if he can even graduate in a couple of days.

“Ok, but lets do it after our final tomorrow” You laugh.

“Dr. Jeon, are you feeling ok?” Jimin asks as he stares at the neurosurgeon sitting in front of him who has gone silent, mind spacing out, and looking detached. This was the first time Jungkook had walked into the clinic without a faint trace of hostility in his eyes and a standoffish attitude, and it concerned Jimin because such a sudden change in a patient’s demeanor meant something had probably happened. And at this moment, Jimin didn’t have a clue what it was.

“I’m fine, probably just tired” Jungkook says, voice sounding airy and loosing the firmness it used to have.

Jimin was not convinced. For one, Jungkook was always tired, and that never put a stop to his sharp words or glaring eyes. And two, the detached look in his eyes was something Jimin had never seen in any of their sessions, no matter what mood Jungkook happened to be in that day.

“Did you perform another long surgery?” Jimin asks.

Jungkook just shakes his head.

“Any new developments at the lab?” He continues to prod.

Jungkook shakes his head again.

“How have your… dreams… been recently?” Jimin asks, desperate to get something more than just a headshake from the troubled neurosurgeon.

“I stopped having them,” Jungkook says, finally bringing his eyes to meet Jimin’s.

The pink haired psychologist looks at Jungkook with surprised expression. Although he’s been working at the clinic for years, Jungkook had been one of his most challenging patients, if not THE most challenging, not only because of his guarded personality and self absorbed attitude, but also because his case was nothing like anything Jimin had dealt with before.

“They stopped at the one where I was sitting under a large oak tree, listening to a child tell a story.” Jungkook continues to explain, face still void of any emotion.

“Were you able to see the child?”

“No.”

There was a moment of silence where neither man spoke, and the only sound that could be heard in the office was the scratch of Jimin’s pen on paper.

“I can, however, feel that it’s the same person”

Jimin stops writing, and slowly lifts his head to look at Jungkook who is clearly still deep in thought.

“I just don’t understand why he or she seems to be aging backwards”

...

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so-fond-of-u · 5 years

Text

5 Things I Wish I Did Throughout College

You’re sitting down with a seasoned veteran—a fifth-year senior—to reminisce on the things I wish I would have done in the four years I’ve been a college student.

For you incoming freshmen, or already struggling college students, I’m here to help.

I’m writing this with hope that you won’t make the same mistakes I did.

I wish I went to class

I’ll be pretty straightforward, I was an awful student. Attending my classes was a low priority on my list, when in reality it should have been at the top of my priority list considering how expensive college is.

There are three types of professors: Mr. Mandatory Attendance, Mrs. Participation, and Ms. I Don’t Care If You Show Up To Class, If You Fail It’s Your Fault.

I’ll break these professors down for you.

Mr. Mandatory Attendance literally requires you to be in class, usually giving you three to four free days. The way it typically goes is for every day you miss after that third or fourth day, you get points knocked off your total grade.

I’ve had plenty of classes that required my attendance and I made the same mistake every. single. time. There would be days where I just couldn’t bear to leave the comfort of my warm bed and decided to use one of my free days to cuddle with my dog and Netflix, or maybe I didn’t agree with the weather.

Before I knew it, I quickly used up all the free days I had. Normally, this would happen mid-October.

October = sick season.

Here’s my advice for you: Use those days sparingly because you never know when you’ll actually need them for good reasons. Sometimes, professors will give you extra credit if you have free days left!

Mrs. participation is a professor who centers classroom attendance based on if you participated in class. For example, five minute group work that you turn in at the end of class or the classic raise-your-hand-and-pray-you’re-right-so-you-don’t-look-like-an-idiot so your professor marks you down for the day.

This is the kind of class that will get you towards the end of the semester and leave you in panic-mode. Consistently skipping participation-based classes will destroy your GPA and you never expect it to until it’s too late. Don’t mess with Mrs. Participation. She’ll ruin you.

Ms. I Don’t Care If You Show Up To Class, If You Fail It’s Your Fault is the type of professor who expects you to be responsible enough to show up on your own. She expects you to sit down at every class, listen, and then leave. It’s a textbook kind of class that students (like me) make the mistake of thinking she totally doesn’t care if I come so this class will be cake. Then I only showed up once a week, had no idea what was going on, and failed the exam.

Long story short, just go to class. Even if your attention isn’t fully on the professor and you’re working on something else (or scrolling through Pinterest on your laptop) you’re still retaining a bit of information, so that counts for something.

2. I wish I managed my time better

This is what our high school teachers constantly warned us about.

Two distinct differences between high school and college are (1) you’re not forced to go to school for eight hours straight and (2) professors don’t give you class time to work on papers or homework (unless they’re super nice, and that is rare).

You’re expected to efficiently manage your time outside of class between four-six classes. Often you’ll have one paper due the same day you have two other exams, as well as homework due in another class.

Tips:

Buy a planner and actually use it

Set reminders on your phone

Schedule at least two days off if you have a job and be as productive as possible

You have to figure out when you can study for those exams (don’t wait the night before, no amount of caffeine will save you), how far ahead you’ll have to start writing that paper, and when you’ll have time to squeeze in finishing that homework.

Sometimes in situations like that, it’s necessary to prioritize which assignments/exams are most important. In some classes, the professors will drop your lowest exam grade; however, you should only take advantage of this if you know you have too much on your plate and there’s no possible way you can get a decent grade.

There are plenty of tools that can help you manage your time, it’s just a matter of finding which one works best for you.

The biggest struggle will be trying to manage your personal time between time set aside for studying and homework.

Always make being a student your first priority, after all, you’re investing in it.

It’s also important to take care of yourself and still set time aside to do the things that make you happy.

3. I wish I studied more

When I was a high school student, I never studied and I still got away with decent grades.

College isn’t that easy. There are classes that only require minimum effort and then there are tedious classes that require extra work and maximum focus.

It’s easy to get into the habit of procrastinating and allowing yourself to wait until the night before to start studying for an exam.

Today, we have too many tools that can help us study to even consider putting it off, because at this point studying is easy. It’s just a matter of making yourself do it.

Tips:

Using pen and paper to write things down boosts your memory retention. Even if you use a laptop during class, just go back over the notes and write them down!

If your professor gives you a study guide, fill it out as the professor lectures. This saves a lot of time from trying to look for the answers outside of class when the professor is going over it in class.

Quizlet. Quizlet. Quizlet. Not only can you make your own flashcards, you can search for the class and see if someone has already made one.

The library is your friend!

If you’re feeling unmotivated to study, start a system where you reward yourself for every hour of studying you get done (I use Netflix and food).

CHEGG! Utilize this tool and find past exams. You could even split the account and subscription with friends to make it cheaper.

4. I wish I planned accordingly to my personal interests as a student

When you first meet with your academic advisor, their main concern isn’t exactly what’s best for you. They’re just trying to get you and a ton of other students enrolled in classes.

As a freshman, I just believed that waking up for 8 a.m. classes was a part of college I would have to deal with. I’ve always been a night owl so obviously, 8 a.m. classes and I don’t get along.

All I needed to tell my advisor was “I won’t be as successful taking a class load with early start times” and talk to them about scheduling your classes later in the day.

It’s important to plan your college career accordingly to how you work best. If you’re not a morning person and have trouble getting yourself out of bed, don’t take an early morning class.

Another thing to plan for when scheduling your classes is when you can eat. If you plan on starting your day early and ending it mid-afternoon, don’t forget to leave a time slot for lunch. If you’re starting your classes after lunch, make sure you have time for dinner.

A tool I’ve habitually leaned on while scheduling my classes is Rate My Professor. This site is a life-saver in terms of preventing you from ending up in a class with a villainous professor; you just input the professor’s name, look for the class in the ratings, and viola! You can decide if you want to take that professor.

I almost forgot! There’s immense pressure to graduate in 4 years, but here’s the thing: only 19% of students graduate with their bachelors in 4 years. I’m not saying become a college student for life, but just take your time. Determine what amount of credit hours works best for you and just go with it!

Additionally, it’s okay to be unsure about your major. You’re young, it’s difficult to imagine yourself in a career field that you’ll be working in until retirement. Take it from someone who has changed their major four times, it’s not the end of the world—if you believe you’ll be happier in the long run, I encourage you to go with your gut!

Side note: keep in mind that if you do have trouble waking up in the mornings, you definitely need to find a permanent solution because hello, full-time job after graduation.

5. I wish I had chosen better friends

When I look back on my four years of college, the one thing I would change first is who I surrounded myself with.

Between the actual school work, the hits on your mental health, and the oh-so familiar feeling of overwhelming stress, you need people you know you can count on.

The last thing you need is to deal with drama that reminds you of high school, or even worse, someone who drags you down with negativity.

Choose your friends wisely.

How do you know if they’re good for you?

They encourage you.

A good friend will push you to study, to take personal time to decompress, and cheer you on.

They push you out of your comfort zone

College is a time where growth is inevitable. There’s only so much growing you can do as a person when you restrict yourself to small circle of comfort, and a good friend will push you to do things to better yourself.

If they’re pushing you to do things that you’re reluctant of trying - keep them around.

They check on you

Sometimes we go MIA and lock ourselves away in our rooms, attempting to hide from the world and our problems. A good friend would notice that you’ve become a little hermit and drag you out of bed.

There’s a ton of other ways that could be check-on worthy and the point is they’ll always notice and be by your side.

Personally, those are three things I believe are the most important to keep a friend around.

Good, reliable friends will make your college experience go so much smoother. It’s no coincidence that once I found two of my best friends who push me, encourage me, and keep an eye out on me, I began pursuing things I never would have, my GPA shot up, and I truly became happy.

College is all about self-control; controlling that sneaky laziness, the skip days, the “I’ll go out this weekend and just pull an all-nighter Sunday night” mentality, and of course, the junk food.

Do yourself a favor and hit the gym every once in a while. It’s good for you.

Welcome to college, freshies.

#college #personal #freshmen #tipsforcollege #blog #Mistakes #collegetools

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krkrandstuff · 5 years

Text

Kristin ponders about Kristin

still trying to figure myself out..

It’s hard to talk about struggling when there is nothing outwardly wrong and there has never been. Am I even struggling or am I just whining? Why can’t I move forward? Why am I stuck?

Lemme summarize and hopefully not ramble too much but this post is for me mainly, soooo, you know. My homelife has been idyllic, happy, I guess. No struggle, nothing traumatic. I’d call it vanilla. Everything was fine. Emotionally, maybe not so much, but growing up is a time of change, right?

I had some body image issues start up in intermediate school, but who doesn’t, honestly? Being a tall and fat female surrounded by petite and cute girls - I felt stupid wanting to be what they were. I shouldn’t be wearing makeup, shopping for skirts and dresses, liking ‘girly’ things, or revealing any bit of my figure. I felt I looked manly. I felt I would be an impostor. I felt that I hated them for having that whatever it was (it’s called confidence, Kristin). It was just better to avoid attention by wearing over-sized shirts and unintentionally ill-fitting jeans. How I ‘felt’ was a lie. Therapy in my early 20s helped with this and I realize now I’m heckin’ cute regardless of what I’m wearing. Oh, and I realized pink is an awesome color. Therapy.. it does help sometimes.

I’ve had some slumps of depression along with a steady stream of ‘eh’-veryday depression. I remember sitting on the playground in 4th grade tracing cracks in the asphalt with a woodchip for ‘fun’ because I had no friends in my class or in my school wing and my teacher wouldn’t let me stay inside to read. It wasn’t fun. That scenario repeated itself in sophomore year high school as none of my friends had a schedule that lined up with mine - not even lunch. We had been together constantly in junior high; to go from that to barely a glimpse of them my first year in a new building was awful (grades 10-12 were at the h.s.). While they ate together, had stories to tell from class, and did group projects together, I was alone. No amount of hanging out on the weekends made me feel like I wasn’t missing out. The following year, I was reunited with them until we graduated, and then all was reasonably well until we went our separate ways yet again.

University started. I tried being a typical college student. I joined some clubs. I did regularly go to my classes. I tried to meet people. I tried to have fun. My hometown friends were doing all these things and more at their schools, why couldn’t I? Eventually, I felt like my being there did not matter one way or the other. Miserable for a variety of reasons, I ended up transferring from one small university to another closer to home. The few people who reached out to me were surprised I was gone - I hadn’t told them as I hadn’t expected them to notice.

I tried again at my new university - joining a bible study, the anime club, and an Asian culture club. I slowly stopped trying. Again, I felt like my presence was negligible and unnecessary, so I withdrew into myself. I whittled my routine down to class, eat, screw around until everyone was asleep, study/work on projects, sleep. I would avoid the school building when I knew my classmates would be there outside of classtime. I even avoided the dining halls and c-stores if I couldn’t be there right when they opened (and were emptiest). I couldn’t focus unless the world was asleep, so working until dawn and beyond became a regular occurrence. I did all I could to avoid others while slowly drudging toward graduation.

Looking back, I can see the depression and anxiety eating at me. They still nip at my heels and make ugly reappearances, but I can mostly deal with them now thanks to therapy my parents forced me into attending due to a post-uni depression slump. The Buproprion I’m on helps some too. I just feel like there is still something more to be dealt with. Something that is still interfering with my life today.

All my life, I’ve been the worst procrastinator. Annoying assignments, enjoyable assignments, I would put them all to the last moment. In Viscom II, we got to design a CD case for our favorite band and I still could not work on it until the night before it was due. I would escape the guilt telling me to work by working on ‘beneficial’ hobbies. Reading is good for my education, so read more instead of working quite yet. Personal artwork was much the same. Why wouldn’t I work on my assignments ahead of time? Maybe it was that I couldn’t. In high school. I vividly recall cleaning the fridge at home top to bottom to prolong working on an essay. I used to blame laziness, but now I think it’s an inability to focus. Self-diagnosing oneself is frowned upon, but I do wonder if I have ADD. Eight paragraphs and I finally get to what I actually wanted to reflect on and ponder! Sorry self and any determined reader for the tangents.

Current me, post-college, working a salaried 7:30-4:30 job, has been having struggles lately. My struggles stem from a worsening ability to focus at work and complete failure to do anything but ‘potato’ at home. I cannot procrastinate my work, certain tasks must be completed within certain time frames or our company faces consequences due to my inaction. However my brain still prefers to focus on every conversation and phone call around me so I can interject with information or a comment (sorry if I’m that annoying person, coworkers). My brain wants to think and talk about different cheesy dishes I desire to try and oh, where to buy Greek cheese to make saganaki. Let’s google that for 10 minutes at 8 in the morning for some reason (that train of thought was this past Thursday). Sometimes my brain gets overloaded listening to all these conversations while the printer is going, the phone is ringing, and someone is trying to get my attention. Sometimes I’m hopping between so many little projects that one more request pushes me to tears.

There are times I want to scream, cry, and run away. None of those are office-appropriate behavior. I feel so wound up by pushing myself through my day that coming down from that at home takes all evening. That is what I call ‘potato-ing’. I zone out to Youtube and Reddit until it’s time to sleep and do it all over. I don’t know how people accomplish anything with their evenings. All I have as far as daily commitments are my job, a loving boyfriend, and two cats and still I do not have the mental energy for a fulfilling evening.

I used to define myself as a reader. I was an artist. I was a gamer. Except for the odd occasion, I don’t do these things anymore. I have a list of books I’ve been meaning to read, but I can’t find the energy to pick them up. I used to have a vivid imagination - much of it stemming from things I’ve read or watched. The source stopped, so I stopped having ideas for what I wanted to draw. I also can’t procrastinate at work, so drawing as a procrastination method is a no-go. I used to have a large list of fandoms I enjoyed, now I couldn’t name any. Some I did outgrow, but mostly, I haven’t been consuming new media because I can’t commit the energy to do so. When I do manage to start a drawing or a new book, I cannot stop. If I stop, I will never finish or go back to it. It is all or nothing.

The only time I feel clear-headed is after everyone has gone to sleep/away and I have had hours to unwind and I am left with perfect solitude. Only then do the inklings of my old pastimes try to make themselves known. Right now, I still don’t usually have the energy to act on them. I’m only able to write this long-ass mess as Joshua has gone to the game shop for the evening. It’s just me, the cats and, the rain outside.

I did do some reading on ADD in women online. The checklist on ADDitude’s site resonates with me a lot and so do posts from redditors on the ADHD subreddit. I feel choked by how much ‘stuff’ I have. Not even close to being a hoarder, but I feel like I can’t keep up or keep these things organized. I shutdown sometimes at work when I feel overloaded. I shutdown sometimes at the grocery store because of the number of bodies and the noise and chaos. I feel like I can’t keep up with what people demand of me, socially and at work. I do start the day wanting to accomplish so much and when I fail because I can’t get the ball rolling, my depression just eats that up.

Writing this all out makes it clearer to me that this is not normal. It is not normal to feel hollow like this. There are things I want to accomplish, but I can never get to them. I can’t get moving. I feel frustrated. I feel sad. I feel stuck.

I, and medical professionals (probably), never considered ADD might be the culprit as, despite being a procrastinator, I always finished my assignments. I can count on one hand the few that I didn’t. I was primarily a straight A student (until college). I didn’t have any obvious focus issues in class. I don’t live in total chaos (probably because my anxiety goes berserk when there is too much clutter). I’m not all over the place, at least on the outside. I look at my sister who does have ADHD and I can very obviously tell when she’s taken her meds or not. These classic symptoms don’t fit me, but the others do.

I’ve addressed the depression and the anxiety and avoidant behaviors (that I didn’t touch on here). This last beast remains to be conquered. If it’s not ADD, it’s something. Something that I can’t handle on my own. I’m going to talk to my primary care when I go in this month. She’ll probably tell me I need to see a psychiatrist again, but this time I think I will take that advice. I’m tired of feeling like this.

Fingers crossed for an answer and hopefully a solution.

Thanks for coming to to my TedRamble. :P

#depression #anxiety #add #maybe?#mental health #personal #reflection #krkrblather

0 notes

andrewdburton · 5 years

Text

3 powerful habits you need to jumpstart the new year

Imagine a dozen dominoes lined up in a row. Push the first domino and what happens? They all fall down.

Now take that same dozen and double it. No, triple it. No, wait — add 15,000 dominoes, branching off into a bunch of crazy shapes and designs. Now, push the first domino and what happens?

Here’s a video to help you out:

youtube

Why are we talking about dominoes and cool YouTube videos? That’s because today we’re talking about keystone habits. These are the habits that — once implemented — have a positive impact on many other facets of your life.

Like the first domino pushed in a row of others, all you need to do is perform this one habit and you’ll see the benefits ripple out.

Let’s break down exactly what a keystone habit is, its origins, and give you three of the best keystone habits you can start today.

What are keystone habits?

Charles Duhigg introduced the concept of keystone habits to millions in his book The Power of Habit. In it, he describes keystone habits as “chain reactions that help other good habits take hold.”

From Charles:

“The power of a keystone habit draws from its ability to change your self-image. Basically anything can become a keystone habit if it has this power to make you see yourself in a different way.”

Let’s take a look at a simple example: Dressing better. If you’re normally seen as the person to whom jeans are “dressing up,” a suit and tie or a nice dress might be completely foreign to you.

Imagine taking the initiative and dressing up for a week though. How do you think that would impact you psychologically?

All of a sudden you’re looking better. People are perceiving you in a new light — and therefore treating you differently. Maybe the barista refers to you as “sir” or “ma’am.” When that happens, you’re likely to start carrying yourself differently. Maybe you’re more confident and self-assured.

See what’s happening? It’s one seemingly small change today that has an outsized impact on other areas of your life.

It’s not just dressing better. It’s feeling more confident. It’s being treated better by the people around you.

That’s the power of keystone habits.

3 keystone habits that’ll change your life

Not all keystone habits are necessarily positive. After all, if you pick up the habit of smoking a pack a day or drinking a sixer of Bud Light each night, you’re going to see it impact other areas of your life negatively.

However, if you recognize good keystone habits and adopt them, you’ll find that your life can drastically improve because of one simple change.

Here are three of the best ones you can implement to help get you started.

Keystone habit 1: More exercise

Exercising regularly is perhaps the most impactful keystone habit you can implement.

And it makes sense. Once you start exercising, you’re not only becoming more conscious about the way your body looks but also what you’re putting into your body as well.

This consciousness starts to spread to other areas of your life. Maybe you’re not eating takeout or going to bars as often, because it’s unhealthy. That means you’re saving money each month you’d otherwise have spent going out.

And here’s where that ripple effect happens: once you see that you’re saving more, you’ll be able to spend money consciously toward your Money Dial. That means using that money and spending it on things that you LOVE instead of crappy takeout.

Charles Duhigg even mentions it in his book as a big keystone habit:

“When you start exercising habitually, according to studies, you start eating more healthfully. That makes sense. You start feeling good about your body. For many people, when they start exercising, they stop using their credit cards quite so often. They procrastinate less at work. They do their dishes earlier in the day. It seems to be evidence that for many people, exercise is a keystone habit. Once you start to change your exercise habits, it sets off a chain reaction that changes other habits as well.”

When I started training for a marathon, I noticed the effects of regular running almost immediately. I knew I had to clean up my lifestyle if I wanted to finish running all 26.2 miles.

That meant giving up smoking, cutting back on after work beers, and getting good sleep. And it worked. That keystone habit gave me the mental willpower I needed to improve my lifestyle.

How you can get started:

Get started running with a simple program like Couch to 5k.

Purchase a gym membership and start lifting weights with a program like Starting Strength.

Join a sports league in your city or local YMCA.

Keystone habit 2: Better sleep

One of the most harmful side effects of “hustle culture” is countless people out there forgoing sleep. After all, more time awake means more work done … right?

Wrong. In fact, studies have shown that a lack of sleep increases the chances of stroke, heart disease, and an early death (which — you know — definitely cuts down the time you can get work done).

I Will Teach You To Be Rich’s founder and CEO Ramit Sethi even wrote about this in his post on productivity:

“My fundamental 80% Win here is that I sleep 7.5 to 8 hours almost every night. It’s not sexy. But as I’m writing this at 9:34am, I slept 8 hours last night and I woke up knowing I was going to have a productive day.”

When you get adequate sleep, your mind and body are primed for a productive day. That means more energy and mental capacity to do the work you want to do — and do it well.

“When I wake up after a full, uninterrupted night’s sleep, I’m ready to meet the day,” says Richard, a Denver-based programmer and IT technician. “I have more energy in the day to get work done and I don’t feel that afternoon drag where I feel like I need a nap.”

If you wake up groggy on four hours of sleep, do you think you’ll be as productive? Sure, you might have more time to work on things, but if your mind and body aren’t in the right place, you sure as heck aren’t getting as many things done.

How you can get started:

Avoid electronics (cell phone, laptop, television) for 30 minutes to an hour before bed.

Download a sleep app (like Sleep Cycle) that can help you track your sleep.

Set a time that you’ll go to bed each night and sleep for at least 7-8 hours a night. If you have an Apple product, you can use Apple’s sleep reminder tool to manage this.

Keystone habit 3: Waking up earlier

Waking up earlier has a number of benefits.

First, research shows that the early morning hours are prime for productivity. Harvard biologist Christoph Randler conducted a study that showed that early risers are more likely to set long-term goals and be more motivated than their late-rising counterparts.

Not only that but early risers tend to have a higher level of cognition and ability to solve complex problems, according to another study. And many CEOs are also early risers — which some studies cite as a reason for their productivity.

Second, the morning is the time when your willpower is at an all-time high. At I Will Teach You To Be Rich, we’ve talked about the limited amount of willpower humans have. When we wake up, our willpower is still high because we’ve used less of it. As the day goes on, our willpower is depleted until it drains completely and all we want to do is watch Netflix after work rather than, say, head to the gym.

Don’t just take our word for it. I talked to Dr. Patrick H., a Chicago-based doctor who recently implemented early rising as part of his strategy to read more — and it’s been working like a charm.

“When I wake up early, I get a lot more work done,” Dr. H says. “I make myself an excellent cup of homemade coffee, which gives me something to enjoy while I read before work. It’s great.”

It doesn’t matter if you’re trying to work out more or working on your novel. By completing tasks while your willpower is high, you become much more likely to complete them.

How you can get started:

Set a time you’re going to wake up every day — no exceptions. Good opportunity to correlate this with your sleep time from the previous section.

Make it easy for you to get up and started with your day. For example, if you plan on heading to the gym, lay out your workout clothes so they’re ready for you when you wake up.

Put your alarm clock in a hard to reach spot. This ensures that you’ll have to physically get up in order to turn it off, increasing your chances of staying up.

What are YOUR keystone habits?

For more on habit building and building winning ones, be sure to check out our resources below:

How to master the habits of successful people

How to break bad habits

Also, here’s an exclusive interview with Ramit and Charles Duhigg conducted a few years ago. It’s a must-see for anyone who wants to get a better sense of Charles’s habit building philosophy.

youtube

Keystone habits have the opportunity to impact your entire life — that’s why we want to offer you something to help you even more:

The Ultimate Guide to Habits: Peak Performance Made Easy

In it, you’ll learn the actionable steps to crush any goal through smart habits. You’ll learn:

How to set goals — the RIGHT way

How to create and implement winning keystone habits

How to make any habit last forever

Just enter your name and email below and I’ll send it straight to your inbox.

3 powerful habits you need to jumpstart the new year is a post from: I Will Teach You To Be Rich.

from Finance https://www.iwillteachyoutoberich.com/blog/keystone-habits/ via http://www.rssmix.com/

0 notes

samuelfields · 5 years

Text

3 powerful habits you need to jumpstart the new year

Imagine a dozen dominoes lined up in a row. Push the first domino and what happens? They all fall down.

Now take that same dozen and double it. No, triple it. No, wait — add 15,000 dominoes, branching off into a bunch of crazy shapes and designs. Now, push the first domino and what happens?

Here’s a video to help you out:

youtube

Like the first domino pushed in a row of others, all you need to do is perform this one habit and you’ll see the benefits ripple out.

Let’s break down exactly what a keystone habit is, its origins, and give you three of the best keystone habits you can start today.

What are keystone habits?

From Charles:

“The power of a keystone habit draws from its ability to change your self-image. Basically anything can become a keystone habit if it has this power to make you see yourself in a different way.”

Imagine taking the initiative and dressing up for a week though. How do you think that would impact you psychologically?

See what’s happening? It’s one seemingly small change today that has an outsized impact on other areas of your life.

It’s not just dressing better. It’s feeling more confident. It’s being treated better by the people around you.

That’s the power of keystone habits.

3 keystone habits that’ll change your life

However, if you recognize good keystone habits and adopt them, you’ll find that your life can drastically improve because of one simple change.

Here are three of the best ones you can implement to help get you started.

Keystone habit 1: More exercise

Exercising regularly is perhaps the most impactful keystone habit you can implement.

And it makes sense. Once you start exercising, you’re not only becoming more conscious about the way your body looks but also what you’re putting into your body as well.

Charles Duhigg even mentions it in his book as a big keystone habit:

When I started training for a marathon, I noticed the effects of regular running almost immediately. I knew I had to clean up my lifestyle if I wanted to finish running all 26.2 miles.

That meant giving up smoking, cutting back on after work beers, and getting good sleep. And it worked. That keystone habit gave me the mental willpower I needed to improve my lifestyle.

How you can get started:

Get started running with a simple program like Couch to 5k.

Purchase a gym membership and start lifting weights with a program like Starting Strength.

Join a sports league in your city or local YMCA.

Keystone habit 2: Better sleep

One of the most harmful side effects of “hustle culture” is countless people out there forgoing sleep. After all, more time awake means more work done … right?

I Will Teach You To Be Rich’s founder and CEO Ramit Sethi even wrote about this in his post on productivity:

When you get adequate sleep, your mind and body are primed for a productive day. That means more energy and mental capacity to do the work you want to do — and do it well.

How you can get started:

Avoid electronics (cell phone, laptop, television) for 30 minutes to an hour before bed.

Download a sleep app (like Sleep Cycle) that can help you track your sleep.

Set a time that you’ll go to bed each night and sleep for at least 7-8 hours a night. If you have an Apple product, you can use Apple’s sleep reminder tool to manage this.

Keystone habit 3: Waking up earlier

Waking up earlier has a number of benefits.

“When I wake up early, I get a lot more work done,” Dr. H says. “I make myself an excellent cup of homemade coffee, which gives me something to enjoy while I read before work. It’s great.”

It doesn’t matter if you’re trying to work out more or working on your novel. By completing tasks while your willpower is high, you become much more likely to complete them.

How you can get started:

Set a time you’re going to wake up every day — no exceptions. Good opportunity to correlate this with your sleep time from the previous section.

Make it easy for you to get up and started with your day. For example, if you plan on heading to the gym, lay out your workout clothes so they’re ready for you when you wake up.

Put your alarm clock in a hard to reach spot. This ensures that you’ll have to physically get up in order to turn it off, increasing your chances of staying up.

What are YOUR keystone habits?

For more on habit building and building winning ones, be sure to check out our resources below:

How to master the habits of successful people

How to break bad habits

Also, here’s an exclusive interview with Ramit and Charles Duhigg conducted a few years ago. It’s a must-see for anyone who wants to get a better sense of Charles’s habit building philosophy.

youtube

Keystone habits have the opportunity to impact your entire life — that’s why we want to offer you something to help you even more:

The Ultimate Guide to Habits: Peak Performance Made Easy

In it, you’ll learn the actionable steps to crush any goal through smart habits. You’ll learn:

How to set goals — the RIGHT way

How to create and implement winning keystone habits

How to make any habit last forever

Just enter your name and email below and I’ll send it straight to your inbox.

3 powerful habits you need to jumpstart the new year is a post from: I Will Teach You To Be Rich.

from Finance https://www.iwillteachyoutoberich.com/blog/keystone-habits/ via http://www.rssmix.com/

0 notes

kennethherrerablog · 5 years

Text

3 powerful habits you need to jumpstart the new year

Imagine a dozen dominoes lined up in a row. Push the first domino and what happens? They all fall down.

Now take that same dozen and double it. No, triple it. No, wait — add 15,000 dominoes, branching off into a bunch of crazy shapes and designs. Now, push the first domino and what happens?

Here’s a video to help you out:

youtube

Like the first domino pushed in a row of others, all you need to do is perform this one habit and you’ll see the benefits ripple out.

Let’s break down exactly what a keystone habit is, its origins, and give you three of the best keystone habits you can start today.

What are keystone habits?

From Charles:

“The power of a keystone habit draws from its ability to change your self-image. Basically anything can become a keystone habit if it has this power to make you see yourself in a different way.”

Imagine taking the initiative and dressing up for a week though. How do you think that would impact you psychologically?

See what’s happening? It’s one seemingly small change today that has an outsized impact on other areas of your life.

It’s not just dressing better. It’s feeling more confident. It’s being treated better by the people around you.

That’s the power of keystone habits.

3 keystone habits that’ll change your life

However, if you recognize good keystone habits and adopt them, you’ll find that your life can drastically improve because of one simple change.

Here are three of the best ones you can implement to help get you started.

Keystone habit 1: More exercise

Exercising regularly is perhaps the most impactful keystone habit you can implement.

And it makes sense. Once you start exercising, you’re not only becoming more conscious about the way your body looks but also what you’re putting into your body as well.

Charles Duhigg even mentions it in his book as a big keystone habit:

When I started training for a marathon, I noticed the effects of regular running almost immediately. I knew I had to clean up my lifestyle if I wanted to finish running all 26.2 miles.

That meant giving up smoking, cutting back on after work beers, and getting good sleep. And it worked. That keystone habit gave me the mental willpower I needed to improve my lifestyle.

How you can get started:

Get started running with a simple program like Couch to 5k.

Purchase a gym membership and start lifting weights with a program like Starting Strength.

Join a sports league in your city or local YMCA.

Keystone habit 2: Better sleep

One of the most harmful side effects of “hustle culture” is countless people out there forgoing sleep. After all, more time awake means more work done … right?

I Will Teach You To Be Rich’s founder and CEO Ramit Sethi even wrote about this in his post on productivity:

When you get adequate sleep, your mind and body are primed for a productive day. That means more energy and mental capacity to do the work you want to do — and do it well.

How you can get started:

Avoid electronics (cell phone, laptop, television) for 30 minutes to an hour before bed.

Download a sleep app (like Sleep Cycle) that can help you track your sleep.

Set a time that you’ll go to bed each night and sleep for at least 7-8 hours a night. If you have an Apple product, you can use Apple’s sleep reminder tool to manage this.

Keystone habit 3: Waking up earlier

Waking up earlier has a number of benefits.

“When I wake up early, I get a lot more work done,” Dr. H says. “I make myself an excellent cup of homemade coffee, which gives me something to enjoy while I read before work. It’s great.”

It doesn’t matter if you’re trying to work out more or working on your novel. By completing tasks while your willpower is high, you become much more likely to complete them.

How you can get started:

Set a time you’re going to wake up every day — no exceptions. Good opportunity to correlate this with your sleep time from the previous section.

Make it easy for you to get up and started with your day. For example, if you plan on heading to the gym, lay out your workout clothes so they’re ready for you when you wake up.

Put your alarm clock in a hard to reach spot. This ensures that you’ll have to physically get up in order to turn it off, increasing your chances of staying up.

What are YOUR keystone habits?

For more on habit building and building winning ones, be sure to check out our resources below:

How to master the habits of successful people

How to break bad habits

Also, here’s an exclusive interview with Ramit and Charles Duhigg conducted a few years ago. It’s a must-see for anyone who wants to get a better sense of Charles’s habit building philosophy.

youtube

Keystone habits have the opportunity to impact your entire life — that’s why we want to offer you something to help you even more:

The Ultimate Guide to Habits: Peak Performance Made Easy

In it, you’ll learn the actionable steps to crush any goal through smart habits. You’ll learn:

How to set goals — the RIGHT way

How to create and implement winning keystone habits

How to make any habit last forever

Just enter your name and email below and I’ll send it straight to your inbox.

3 powerful habits you need to jumpstart the new year is a post from: I Will Teach You To Be Rich.

3 powerful habits you need to jumpstart the new year published first on https://justinbetreviews.tumblr.com/

0 notes

paulckrueger · 5 years

Text

3 powerful habits you need to jumpstart the new year

Imagine a dozen dominoes lined up in a row. Push the first domino and what happens? They all fall down.

Now take that same dozen and double it. No, triple it. No, wait — add 15,000 dominoes, branching off into a bunch of crazy shapes and designs. Now, push the first domino and what happens?

Here’s a video to help you out:

youtube

Like the first domino pushed in a row of others, all you need to do is perform this one habit and you’ll see the benefits ripple out.

Let’s break down exactly what a keystone habit is, its origins, and give you three of the best keystone habits you can start today.

What are keystone habits?

From Charles:

“The power of a keystone habit draws from its ability to change your self-image. Basically anything can become a keystone habit if it has this power to make you see yourself in a different way.”

Imagine taking the initiative and dressing up for a week though. How do you think that would impact you psychologically?

See what’s happening? It’s one seemingly small change today that has an outsized impact on other areas of your life.

It’s not just dressing better. It’s feeling more confident. It’s being treated better by the people around you.

That’s the power of keystone habits.

3 keystone habits that’ll change your life

However, if you recognize good keystone habits and adopt them, you’ll find that your life can drastically improve because of one simple change.

Here are three of the best ones you can implement to help get you started.

Keystone habit 1: More exercise

Exercising regularly is perhaps the most impactful keystone habit you can implement.

And it makes sense. Once you start exercising, you’re not only becoming more conscious about the way your body looks but also what you’re putting into your body as well.

Charles Duhigg even mentions it in his book as a big keystone habit:

When I started training for a marathon, I noticed the effects of regular running almost immediately. I knew I had to clean up my lifestyle if I wanted to finish running all 26.2 miles.

That meant giving up smoking, cutting back on after work beers, and getting good sleep. And it worked. That keystone habit gave me the mental willpower I needed to improve my lifestyle.

How you can get started:

Get started running with a simple program like Couch to 5k.

Purchase a gym membership and start lifting weights with a program like Starting Strength.

Join a sports league in your city or local YMCA.

Keystone habit 2: Better sleep

One of the most harmful side effects of “hustle culture” is countless people out there forgoing sleep. After all, more time awake means more work done … right?

I Will Teach You To Be Rich’s founder and CEO Ramit Sethi even wrote about this in his post on productivity:

When you get adequate sleep, your mind and body are primed for a productive day. That means more energy and mental capacity to do the work you want to do — and do it well.

How you can get started:

Avoid electronics (cell phone, laptop, television) for 30 minutes to an hour before bed.

Download a sleep app (like Sleep Cycle) that can help you track your sleep.

Set a time that you’ll go to bed each night and sleep for at least 7-8 hours a night. If you have an Apple product, you can use Apple’s sleep reminder tool to manage this.

Keystone habit 3: Waking up earlier

Waking up earlier has a number of benefits.

“When I wake up early, I get a lot more work done,” Dr. H says. “I make myself an excellent cup of homemade coffee, which gives me something to enjoy while I read before work. It’s great.”

It doesn’t matter if you’re trying to work out more or working on your novel. By completing tasks while your willpower is high, you become much more likely to complete them.

How you can get started:

Set a time you’re going to wake up every day — no exceptions. Good opportunity to correlate this with your sleep time from the previous section.

Make it easy for you to get up and started with your day. For example, if you plan on heading to the gym, lay out your workout clothes so they’re ready for you when you wake up.

Put your alarm clock in a hard to reach spot. This ensures that you’ll have to physically get up in order to turn it off, increasing your chances of staying up.

What are YOUR keystone habits?

For more on habit building and building winning ones, be sure to check out our resources below:

How to master the habits of successful people

How to break bad habits

Also, here’s an exclusive interview with Ramit and Charles Duhigg conducted a few years ago. It’s a must-see for anyone who wants to get a better sense of Charles’s habit building philosophy.

youtube

Keystone habits have the opportunity to impact your entire life — that’s why we want to offer you something to help you even more:

The Ultimate Guide to Habits: Peak Performance Made Easy

In it, you’ll learn the actionable steps to crush any goal through smart habits. You’ll learn:

How to set goals — the RIGHT way

How to create and implement winning keystone habits

How to make any habit last forever

Just enter your name and email below and I’ll send it straight to your inbox.

3 powerful habits you need to jumpstart the new year is a post from: I Will Teach You To Be Rich.

from Surety Bond Brokers? Business https://www.iwillteachyoutoberich.com/blog/keystone-habits/

0 notes

mcjoelcain · 5 years

Text

3 powerful habits you need to jumpstart the new year

Imagine a dozen dominoes lined up in a row. Push the first domino and what happens? They all fall down.

Now take that same dozen and double it. No, triple it. No, wait — add 15,000 dominoes, branching off into a bunch of crazy shapes and designs. Now, push the first domino and what happens?

Here’s a video to help you out:

youtube

Like the first domino pushed in a row of others, all you need to do is perform this one habit and you’ll see the benefits ripple out.

Let’s break down exactly what a keystone habit is, its origins, and give you three of the best keystone habits you can start today.

What are keystone habits?

From Charles:

“The power of a keystone habit draws from its ability to change your self-image. Basically anything can become a keystone habit if it has this power to make you see yourself in a different way.”

Imagine taking the initiative and dressing up for a week though. How do you think that would impact you psychologically?

See what’s happening? It’s one seemingly small change today that has an outsized impact on other areas of your life.

It’s not just dressing better. It’s feeling more confident. It’s being treated better by the people around you.

That’s the power of keystone habits.

3 keystone habits that’ll change your life

However, if you recognize good keystone habits and adopt them, you’ll find that your life can drastically improve because of one simple change.

Here are three of the best ones you can implement to help get you started.

Keystone habit 1: More exercise

Exercising regularly is perhaps the most impactful keystone habit you can implement.

And it makes sense. Once you start exercising, you’re not only becoming more conscious about the way your body looks but also what you’re putting into your body as well.

Charles Duhigg even mentions it in his book as a big keystone habit:

When I started training for a marathon, I noticed the effects of regular running almost immediately. I knew I had to clean up my lifestyle if I wanted to finish running all 26.2 miles.

That meant giving up smoking, cutting back on after work beers, and getting good sleep. And it worked. That keystone habit gave me the mental willpower I needed to improve my lifestyle.

How you can get started:

Get started running with a simple program like Couch to 5k.

Purchase a gym membership and start lifting weights with a program like Starting Strength.

Join a sports league in your city or local YMCA.

Keystone habit 2: Better sleep

One of the most harmful side effects of “hustle culture” is countless people out there forgoing sleep. After all, more time awake means more work done … right?

I Will Teach You To Be Rich’s founder and CEO Ramit Sethi even wrote about this in his post on productivity:

When you get adequate sleep, your mind and body are primed for a productive day. That means more energy and mental capacity to do the work you want to do — and do it well.

How you can get started:

Avoid electronics (cell phone, laptop, television) for 30 minutes to an hour before bed.

Download a sleep app (like Sleep Cycle) that can help you track your sleep.

Set a time that you’ll go to bed each night and sleep for at least 7-8 hours a night. If you have an Apple product, you can use Apple’s sleep reminder tool to manage this.

Keystone habit 3: Waking up earlier

Waking up earlier has a number of benefits.

“When I wake up early, I get a lot more work done,” Dr. H says. “I make myself an excellent cup of homemade coffee, which gives me something to enjoy while I read before work. It’s great.”

It doesn’t matter if you’re trying to work out more or working on your novel. By completing tasks while your willpower is high, you become much more likely to complete them.

How you can get started:

Set a time you’re going to wake up every day — no exceptions. Good opportunity to correlate this with your sleep time from the previous section.

Make it easy for you to get up and started with your day. For example, if you plan on heading to the gym, lay out your workout clothes so they’re ready for you when you wake up.

Put your alarm clock in a hard to reach spot. This ensures that you’ll have to physically get up in order to turn it off, increasing your chances of staying up.

What are YOUR keystone habits?

For more on habit building and building winning ones, be sure to check out our resources below:

How to master the habits of successful people

How to break bad habits

Also, here’s an exclusive interview with Ramit and Charles Duhigg conducted a few years ago. It’s a must-see for anyone who wants to get a better sense of Charles’s habit building philosophy.

youtube

Keystone habits have the opportunity to impact your entire life — that’s why we want to offer you something to help you even more:

The Ultimate Guide to Habits: Peak Performance Made Easy

In it, you’ll learn the actionable steps to crush any goal through smart habits. You’ll learn:

How to set goals — the RIGHT way

How to create and implement winning keystone habits

How to make any habit last forever

Just enter your name and email below and I’ll send it straight to your inbox.

3 powerful habits you need to jumpstart the new year is a post from: I Will Teach You To Be Rich.

from Money https://www.iwillteachyoutoberich.com/blog/keystone-habits/ via http://www.rssmix.com/

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kennethherrerablog · 5 years

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3 powerful habits you need to jumpstart the new year

Imagine a dozen dominoes lined up in a row. Push the first domino and what happens? They all fall down.

Now take that same dozen and double it. No, triple it. No, wait — add 15,000 dominoes, branching off into a bunch of crazy shapes and designs. Now, push the first domino and what happens?

Here’s a video to help you out:

youtube

Like the first domino pushed in a row of others, all you need to do is perform this one habit and you’ll see the benefits ripple out.

Let’s break down exactly what a keystone habit is, its origins, and give you three of the best keystone habits you can start today.

What are keystone habits?

From Charles:

“The power of a keystone habit draws from its ability to change your self-image. Basically anything can become a keystone habit if it has this power to make you see yourself in a different way.”

Imagine taking the initiative and dressing up for a week though. How do you think that would impact you psychologically?

See what’s happening? It’s one seemingly small change today that has an outsized impact on other areas of your life.

It’s not just dressing better. It’s feeling more confident. It’s being treated better by the people around you.

That’s the power of keystone habits.

3 keystone habits that’ll change your life

However, if you recognize good keystone habits and adopt them, you’ll find that your life can drastically improve because of one simple change.

Here are three of the best ones you can implement to help get you started.

Keystone habit 1: More exercise

Exercising regularly is perhaps the most impactful keystone habit you can implement.

And it makes sense. Once you start exercising, you’re not only becoming more conscious about the way your body looks but also what you’re putting into your body as well.

Charles Duhigg even mentions it in his book as a big keystone habit:

When I started training for a marathon, I noticed the effects of regular running almost immediately. I knew I had to clean up my lifestyle if I wanted to finish running all 26.2 miles.

That meant giving up smoking, cutting back on after work beers, and getting good sleep. And it worked. That keystone habit gave me the mental willpower I needed to improve my lifestyle.

How you can get started:

Get started running with a simple program like Couch to 5k.

Purchase a gym membership and start lifting weights with a program like Starting Strength.

Join a sports league in your city or local YMCA.

Keystone habit 2: Better sleep

One of the most harmful side effects of “hustle culture” is countless people out there forgoing sleep. After all, more time awake means more work done … right?

I Will Teach You To Be Rich’s founder and CEO Ramit Sethi even wrote about this in his post on productivity:

When you get adequate sleep, your mind and body are primed for a productive day. That means more energy and mental capacity to do the work you want to do — and do it well.

How you can get started:

Avoid electronics (cell phone, laptop, television) for 30 minutes to an hour before bed.

Download a sleep app (like Sleep Cycle) that can help you track your sleep.

Set a time that you’ll go to bed each night and sleep for at least 7-8 hours a night. If you have an Apple product, you can use Apple’s sleep reminder tool to manage this.

Keystone habit 3: Waking up earlier

Waking up earlier has a number of benefits.

“When I wake up early, I get a lot more work done,” Dr. H says. “I make myself an excellent cup of homemade coffee, which gives me something to enjoy while I read before work. It’s great.”

It doesn’t matter if you’re trying to work out more or working on your novel. By completing tasks while your willpower is high, you become much more likely to complete them.

How you can get started:

Set a time you’re going to wake up every day — no exceptions. Good opportunity to correlate this with your sleep time from the previous section.

Make it easy for you to get up and started with your day. For example, if you plan on heading to the gym, lay out your workout clothes so they’re ready for you when you wake up.

Put your alarm clock in a hard to reach spot. This ensures that you’ll have to physically get up in order to turn it off, increasing your chances of staying up.

What are YOUR keystone habits?

For more on habit building and building winning ones, be sure to check out our resources below:

How to master the habits of successful people

How to break bad habits

Also, here’s an exclusive interview with Ramit and Charles Duhigg conducted a few years ago. It’s a must-see for anyone who wants to get a better sense of Charles’s habit building philosophy.

youtube

Keystone habits have the opportunity to impact your entire life — that’s why we want to offer you something to help you even more:

The Ultimate Guide to Habits: Peak Performance Made Easy

In it, you’ll learn the actionable steps to crush any goal through smart habits. You’ll learn:

How to set goals — the RIGHT way

How to create and implement winning keystone habits

How to make any habit last forever

Just enter your name and email below and I’ll send it straight to your inbox.

3 powerful habits you need to jumpstart the new year is a post from: I Will Teach You To Be Rich.

3 powerful habits you need to jumpstart the new year published first on https://justinbetreviews.tumblr.com/

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