#also for the past like 3 months ive been like wow my neck hurts a lot i wonder why oh well | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

gsophie43 · 3 years

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Game of Survival

Chapter 3

Jay awoke and shifted his head. He looked to the side to see Hailey and Will sitting next to him. Hailey was asleep but it seemed as though Will had been watching him sleep. A little creepy, but Jay couldn’t blame him.

“Hey.” He was surprised by the scratchiness of his voice.

“Hey.”

“What time is it?”

“A little past 12:30 in the morning.”

“Hmm.”

“Jay, I need to tell you something.”

“Did you get arrested? Who do I have to bribe?” Jay attempted to deflect Will’s serious tone. Will cracked a smile.

“No one. But, uh. Your neck.”

“Yeah?”

“They’re gonna have to do another reconstruction surgery. Finish repairing the muscles. The bullet did a lot of damage to your skin as well. You might need a skin graft. That may mean a third surgery. They may do it during the next one. It depends.”

“On what?”

“How long you’re under. If they have time. If your cbc comes back good from the transfusion. If it doesn’t then you risk bleeding out if you’re under too long. If they need things to heal up a little bit first.”

Jay shifted his jaw.

“So I won’t be able to go back to work for a while.” Jay observed.

“No.” Will sighed. “Not for a few months.”

“When are they planning on doing it?”

“It’s scheduled for the morning after tomorrow. Or tomorrow morning technically, I guess.” Jay sighed.

“Does Hailey know?”

“No. She doesn’t.”

“Can I tell her?”

“Yeah.”

“Do I need to shave before?” Will smiled.

“They will do that for you. But, I have certain contacts that made sure you were fully shaved last time instead of getting half a beard.” Will said mischievously.

“They would really only shave half of someone’s face?”

“If they didn’t need to shave the other side.”

“That’s just awful.” Jay laughed. Will smiled.

“Anything to make sure my brother remained a baby face.”

“Shut up.” Will smiled at his brother doped up on pain meds.

“Alright, now that that’s out of the way, we can both go to sleep.”

“Sounds good to me.” Jay said, closing his eyes.

He woke up late in the morning. Hailey was whispering something, so he decided to be nosy, and keep his eyes closed and listen.

“I love you so much, you know that. I love your freckles. The way that they’re all different sizes. And I love your curly hair. It’s so thick and soft and beautiful. And I love your hazel eyes. I love that they’re multicolored, I love that they change colors. I love the scars. I know you hate them. They remind you of Afghanistan. And I know you think they’re ugly. I think they’re beautiful because they’re a part of you. And I don't know how to tell you all of this. And you almost died and I thought I missed my chance to to tell you how amazing you are. I wish I knew how to tell you that you’re everything to me when you’re not asleep-”

“Just like that.” Jay said softly, opening his eyes. Hailey was perched next to him, sitting on the bed. She gasped and a horrified look crossed her face.

“Hailey, you’re beautiful, strong, brave and so many other things but most of all you’re everything to me too.”

“You heard that?”

“Yeah.”

She stared at his neck, wrapped from his chin to his shoulder with gauze sticking up on one side. She felt as if the air was stolen from her lungs.

“How bad.” She squeaked out.

“Huh?”

“How bad did it hurt.” She said slowly reaching out and touching the surface of the bandages. Tears welled up quickly in her eyes and her vision started to blur. He could see the guilt in her eyes and it broke his heart.

“Hailey” he whispered, grabbing her hand. “I’m still here.” He said, putting her hand over his heart. “I’m gonna be okay.” She put her head down and nodded.

“I should have had your back.”

“You did. You were there and pressed on the wound. You made sure I didn’t bleed out. If you hadn’t, I probably wouldn’t be here today. You saved my life.”

“Hey,” he tried to soothe. “It’s gonna be okay.” Hailey wiped her tears and forced a smile.

“Yeah.” She pulled her hand away like it was burning. “I’m sorry. It’s just, you mean alot, so it sucked to watch you almost die.” Jay looked at her beautiful figure as they sat in silence. He didn’t know how to respond.

“Will says I’m gonna have another surgery tomorrow morning.” Jay broke the silence.

“What for?”

“To finish the reconstruction from the first surgery. He also said I might need a skin graft which could potentially be a third surgery if they can’t do it during the second surgery.”

“Huh.”

“I- uh- Can you tell the team? I don’t want to drag them all the way down here.”

“I’ll call Trudy and tell her.”

“And tell her what?” A female voice from the door startled them.

“Sarge!” Jay said as Hailey jumped up from her spot.

“I don’t know if you’ll like them, but I brought flowers because it's a custom practice in the United States when visiting someone in the hospital.”

“Thank you,Sarge. You can put them wherever.” He quickly realized how sore his neck was as he strained to turn his head and see her.

She pulled up a chair and sat next to Hailey.

“How are you feeling?” She asked sincerely.

“I’m sore all the time. Hurts really bad when the meds start to wear off.”

“From what I heard, you took a hell of a blast.” His eyes flickered over to Hailey before looking back at Trudy.

“I guess. I don’t really remember. It’s kind of a blur.”

“Everyone’s worried about you. People keep coming up to my desk to ask how you’re doing.”

“What have you been telling them so far?”

“Well, you were in surgery, you were out of surgery. You were recovering and stable. Stuff like that.”

“Hmm. Well, uh, Hailey was gonna tell you that I have another surgery tomorrow morning. They gotta finish fixing everything. I was wondering if you could tell the team for me.”

“Definitely. I can do that.”

“Thankyou.”

“Alright then, let me head back to the district before it turns into a mad house.Do you guys need anything before I go?”

“I’m good, thanks.”

“No, thanks.”

“Hang in there, Halstead.”

“See you, Sarge.”

The rest of the day was tense. Both Jay and Hailey were nervous about his upcoming surgery. Rojas stopped by for a visit, and Will came by in the late afternoon, forcing Hailey to go home and freshen up. She came back in the evening and spent the rest of the night with him. Jay didn’t sleep well that night. He was anxious and restless. Jay did finally manage to fall asleep and was woken up by Will.

“Hey buddy, we need to start getting you prepped.”

“What time is it?”

“A little past six.”

“Can you wake Hailey up?” Will did and Hailey quietly stroked his hair as they started setting a new IV up and getting his catheter in and transferring him to a stretcher.

“Hailey, I’m scared.” He admitted in a whisper once all the nurses had left.

“I know. You’re going to be okay. Will is gonna be with you the whole time.”

“Will you be here when I wake up?”

“I promise.”

She slowly bent down and their lips connected.

She pulled away slowly.

“Good thoughts only, Jay.” She whispered, her lips twitching up into a smirk. Sadly, she couldn’t comb her fingers through his hair because it was covered in a hairnet.

“Good thoughts only.” He echoed as their fingers intertwined.

“The team wanted me to have us call them before you went in.”

“The team?”

“Well, call Adam. Who would have the team there.”

“Oh. Ok.” Hailey pulled out her phone and dialed the number.

“Hello?” Adam answered.

“Hey, phone’s speaker. Jay’s here.”

“Guys, guys. It’s Jay.” The heard Adam say in the distance. There was some rustling before a chorus of greetings.

“How are you feeling this morning?” Kim asked.

“I’m feeling good. Just want to get it over with.”

“Not nervous though, right?” Kevin said.

“Nah, man. Never.” Jay joked back.

“Stay strong, Jay. We’re sorry we couldn’t be there but we wanted to make sure you knew we were all rooting for you.” Rojas said.

“Yeah man, you got this.” Adam said.

“Thankyou guys so much.”

“Hang in there Jay. We need you back here.” Hank’s gravelly voice said.

“Thank you.” They said their farewells and ended the call. Will made his way from the door to Jay’s bed.

“Aright, Hailey can’t walk with you the whole way but she can walk most of the way. I will be in the OR with you the whole time. Perks of being a doctor here. I will try to get Hailey as soon as the operation is over. There may be a chance that you will be sedated overnight to rest.”

“Okay.”

“Are you ready brother?”

“Yeah.” The started the journey to the OR. They stopped at the double doors that only staff could go through and Hailey gently kissed his forehead.

“Good thoughts only.” She whispered.

“I love you.” He whispered.

“Tell me that after.” She gave his hand a long squeeze before nodding to Will.

From there he was quickly transported, sedated, and the operation started.

She went back to the waiting room. It was like déjà vu. She waited and waited. She let a few tears fall. She let herself be angry at the shooter. She let herself ride an emotional roller coaster. Finally she was just exhausted and fell asleep in the chair. She was gently awoken by Will.

“Hailey...Hailey?”

“Huh?”

“Surgery’s over.”

“It is?”

“Yeah. They have him in his room already. He did really good. His vitals stayed steady throughout. And they were able to complete the graft already. We’re gonna keep him sedated overnight so he can rest.”

“So no more surgeries?”

“No more surgeries.”

“That’s great.”

“Yeah, its really good. The only downside is that there will be a lot of scarring and rehabilitation will hell.”

“Wow, way to kill the mood.”

“Sorry. Uh, we have him on an NG tube to feed him tonight and tomorrow. His stomach will be sensitive from the anesthesia. I can take you to sit with him.”

“Thankyou.” He escorted Hailey back to the familiar room.

Her partner lay there once again. He was sleeping peacefully despite the bandages and the icepack. A small yellow tube coming out of his nose was taped to his cheek and tucked behind his ear. A mask rested over his nose and mouth. Hailey smiled.

“He looks so peaceful.”

“I don’t think he’s slept like this since.. well… since before he enlisted.”

“Yeah…”

They sat with Jay for a while, occasionally cracking jokes about Jay getting plastic surgery, before Will went out and got both of them some supper. After, the team visited when they were done with work. All night Hailey slept holding Jay’s hand. The morning was pretty dull. Jay was given meds, an NG feeding, and taken off the sedation. The mask was removed and replaced with a cannula. The team dropped by again, whispering and chatting while Jay slept. They missed it the first time Jay blinked his eyes open because he was asleep again in a matter of a handful of seconds. The second time was a little different, because Jay made a noise when he awoke. Adam nudged Hailey who was at Jay’s side as his eyes cracked open.

“Hey, big guy.”

“I love you.” Hailey froze, Jay probably didn’t realize that the rest of the team was there. But, then again, it wasn’t like the team didn’t already know they were dating and had been for a long time. Jay took a breath before talking again.

“You told me to tell you after the surgery.” Hailey smiled. Of course Jay would be the one to remember something like that.

“Awwwwww… how cute.” Adam teased.

“Jesus...” Jay whispered under his breath, realizing he had an audience and reddening with embarrassment.

“That might be one of the cutest things I’ve seen all year.” The team giggled.

“Shut up, Adam.” Jay and Hailey said in unison.

“Man, someone’s cranky.” Adam retorted. Jay rolled his eyes.

“Glad you’re awake, man.” Jay fist bumped Adam. Jay was met with a chorus of greetings. When asked how he was feeling he answered that his neck and his thighs were sore, to which Hailey had to explain that that was where they took the skin from to graft it in. Jay lasted for all of about thirty more seconds before falling back asleep. Will woke him up in the afternoon to pull his feeding tube. It was a terrible experience that made Jay tear up and sneeze and cough from the tickling sensation in his nose and the back of his nose. Jay rubbed his nose aggressively to try to get rid of the feeling. Jay fell back asleep shortly thereafter. He woke up and was covered in his favorite blanket. It was a fleece blanket Will had bought him once that was camo with the 75th Rangers insignia on it. It was soft and Jay had frequently used it. Someone had obviously picked it up from his apartment. Will, who was sitting next to him, smiled and held up a container of red jello and a spoon.

“Wanna try it?” Jay smiled. It reminded him of his mom. When he would get sick as a kid, his mom would cover him in his favorite blanket and give him jello. Granted, Jay mostly got stomach bugs as a kid so that would be one of the few things he could keep down.

“Yeah.” He said, gladly accepting it.

He quietly opened it and took a bite before looking at Will.

“Hey Will?”

“Yeah?”

“What do you think Mom would say if she was here? About me getting shot, again? Do you think she’d be disappointed?”

“No, no. I think she’d be worried. But more than that, I think she would be proud. Not that you got hurt. But that you were pushing a civilian out of harm’s way when it happened. You were being selfless. I think she would tell you that it was a good call. But she would probably also tell you that she would want you to be more careful. Even though you couldn’t control it.”

“It’s hard going into the field sometimes. I know that it’s my duty as a cop to protect, but I worry. Because I don’t want to leave you here alone. I mean, I became a cop because I didn’t think it mattered if anything happened to me. Mom was gone, Dad had disappeared, you were in New York. But now I have you, and I have Hailey, and the team.” Jay set down his Jello container and finished his last bite.

“I don’t even know what I’m saying. I think I might be a little high.” Will laughed at him and Jay smiled.

“Oh brother. I love you so much.”

“Ditto.” Will rolled his eyes.

“Mom would say she loved you no matter what you did or what you were going through.”

“She loved us.”

“Yeah.” Will rubbed Jay’s leg.

“You wanna stay awake. We can turn on the news or something.”

“Oh that sounds good.”

They flipped through channels until Jay stopped Will.

“Go back.” Will did to see Deputy Superintendent Miller on a podium, holding a press conference.

“Turn it up.”

“During the shooting, however, the responding officer, Detective Jay Halstead, sustained a life threatening injury. The offender fired multiple rounds at Detective Halstead using a shot gun, one of which unfortunately hit Detective Halstead’s neck. He underwent life saving surgery and is now recovering from a second surgery. Detective Halstead acted humbly and heroically, trying to protect a civilian from danger, and the CPD commends his efforts.”

“That made it up the ranks quick” Jay commented.

“Yeah.”

“Can you put something else on?” Jay asked after a few seconds. “I don’t really feel like listening about my own near death experience.”

“Yeah.” Will put on some documentary before sitting back down. They didn’t speak to each other but enjoyed each other’s company. Hailey came with dinner for her and Will which they mercilessly teased Jay about. As the night fell, Will decided to go home that night, knowing Hailey would call him if anything happened. They talked until they both decided to settle down to sleep. As Hailey was about to doze off, Jay’s voice startled her awake.

“Hailey. Hailey?”

“I’m here, what do you need?” She said standing up.

“I don’t know how to ask this. But, I’m wide awake. And I thought maybe it was because I’m used to sleeping with you at home. I - I don’t know- I - can you lay with me. Please?” Jay held his breath waiting for the answer. Hailey carefully sat down on the edge of his bed.

“You just had surgery, I don’t want to hurt you.”

“You won’t. And if you do, I’ll tell you” Hailey gave him a look, knowing he probably wouldn’t.

“I promise.”

“Scoot over, then. My ass is not that tiny.” Jay smiled and complied.

She fit right next to him, her warmth was comforting as he put an arm around her. She avoided touching his neck and instead scooted down enough to put her head on his chest.

“Your sweatshirt smells good.” He whispered.

“Mmm… it smells like hospitals.”

“It smells like you. Perfect.”

“Oh shut up.” They both chuckled at his cheesiness.

“I had to try.” He said, pulling the blanket up.

“Nice blanket.” Hailey commented, noticed the logo.

“Yeah, Will got it for me years ago for Christmas or something.”

“This year I think I’ll get you bubble wrap for Christmas. And that way, you’ll have an extra layer of padding when you go out in the field.”

“Oh really? I can’t wait.” Hailey snickered and rolled her eyes.

“All I want for Christmas is for you to be safe.”

“That would be nice. Stop having to be in hospitals.”

“Why do you hate them so much?”

“Uh-Afghanistan. I uh- injured my back- broke a few vertebrae. Spent five weeks in a hospital in Kandahar.”

“That’s where you were stationed?”

“No, I was actually stationed in the Korengal valley. But it was the closest hospital.”

Hailey set a hand on Jay’s chest.

“You don’t have to talk about it, but was that after the explosion?” Jay nodded silently.

“It was scary, and unfamiliar and everything just seemed so uncertain. I woke up and I couldn’t walk for close to six months.”

“I’m so sorry.”

“It’s fine. I mean, it was horrible. It was the most painful thing I’ve ever been through. But it’s over now. It’s healed. I’m just grateful that I can walk.”

“The more I know about you, the more I realize that I have no clue who you really are.” Jay immediately caught on that she was quoting him.

“Good, my plan is working.” He quoted her without skipping a beat. He squeezed her closer.

“Goodnight, Hailey Ann ‘hopefully in the future Halstead’”

“Oh my gosh, goodnight, Jay ‘I love saying the cheesiest stuff to my girlfriend’ Halstead.”

#Jay Halstead fanfiction

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starbuck09256 · 5 years

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Green Sweater

You know the one, that one she favors in Season 7. Yea that one. Wonder who picked it out for her?? We all know.

Fictober day 7. Barely making it.

tagging @today-in-fic and @suitablyaggrieved

She stands at the edge of the luggage carousel watching it spin round and round with a small purple suitcase spins past her, mocking her each time it goes around as not another bag drops. She stares down at her black heels, anger blooming up in her chest as she thinks about the fact that it was ridiculous to check her bag, she only did so because they were racing through the terminal. Mulder and his be ready in 10 minutes. She gets that sometimes they do need to leave with little notice. She knows she's not really mad at him but the airline. The 12 hour flight with 2 delays and a middle seat the entire time as done little to dissuade her anger. She just wants her pajamas. She’s still feeling the effects of the chemo even with the recent remission status she’s received. She also doesn’t want to complain, have Mulder pull her out of the field, tell her to go home and rest. She wants to live now, she wants to be out there in the field using her talents again. She needs the challenge because in the last few months all her energy had been drained fighting the invisible force lingering from her chip. She wants to have her mind back, her body back. She wants to feel warm, to feel Mulders love not just in a hospital bed. She wants to move them forward, try and find the beauty in the world again. First though she wants to change into pajamas grab some popcorn from the convenience store and maybe just maybe lay down next to Mulder and fall asleep. She throws up her hand as the purple bag finally gets picked up by the punk teenager with the colorful mohawk. She is defeated once more as she resigns herself to meekly head over to the airline counter Mulder is already sweet talking the attendant.

“No more flights tonight dude, there is a mall though about 5 minutes away. They are still open you know with the holidays coming up.”

Scully looks over his shoulder to see that he has in fact accurately described her bag with precision. She looks up and is so sad sighing.

“I probably have an extra shirt you can sleep in Scully.” he mutters toeing his food against his black roller bag.

She can’t help but feel angry staring up into the bright florescent light that blinks back at her. This man has cost her so many outfits and heels. He practically owes her a new wardrobe. She takes a deep breath, thinks about the mediated therapy she tried when she was sick. Thinks about being grateful to even be wearing clothes or heels to begin with and not still be tethered to an IV or worse buried in some terrible outfit her mother thought would encompass her in the afterlife. He sees her anger most of this is his fault. He should have told her last night, he shouldn’t of kept her up arguing over some cryptoid he found, shouldn’t have stayed over longer and let her sleep against him so long. She wouldn’t be rubbing her neck or have been so out of it when he picked her up. He taps his fingers on the counter, remembers the girl letting him know that this baggage claim was pretty much incompetant and Scully would be lucky to get her bag by next week. He knows he’s ruined a few things of hers, shirts with his blood, shoes with the running in the woods. Jackets and pants getting covered in god knows what. She now uses his dryer cleaner, who doesn’t ask questions but shakes their head and gives him a look. He thinks they were just happy to see that he had a lady friend after all. Never removing lipstick being the one thing they never had to worry about. He grabs the rental car keys reaches down and grabs Scullys hand.

“Mulder what?”

“Let's go to the mall,”

“You are not serious”

She doesn’t want to shop, she hasn’t gained back the muscle she wants. She was out so much that the 60% short term disability leave that she did take really hurt her overall savings and she doesn’t want something cheap. She wants Brooks Brothers, to look like a partner worthy of the man she stands next too. It’s taken her a bit of time to find some good thrift shops that lobbyists favor to donate clothes.

“I’m buying” he says as he wheels his bag and heads towards the car.

She’s never paid full price for anything, growing up with 4 kids on one income even with Base stores meant you hit shops carefully, you planned and you saved and you found ways to buy quality garments that lasted. Her student loans and medical school only made her even more conscious of the importance of being thrifty. She would rather have a spacious place in Georgetown then any latest trend. Now though now she is staring at beautifully crafted clothes that hug her athletic figure in ways that she only dreamed. Mulder went through Brooks Brothers in record time, they close in 20 minutes and he didn’t want her to feel the pressure so he just started picking stuff in her size. Normally she would hate it, would hate someone picking out things for her to wear but now she is standing in a fitting room wearing a pencil black skirt with a hunter green sweater and she sees the woman she is, the sweater so light and comfortable perfect for an evening at home or with a blazer at work. Mulder grabs a blazer and another white blouse throws them over the stall door.

“Hey I know it looks good on you, hurry up so we can pay for it, we still need to get you some sneakers for the autopsies tomorrow”

She can’t help but bite her lip. She laughs for a second, another shirt comes flying over the top.

“This one isn’t for you it's for me, don’t wear it around Skinner though… oh I just noticed the famous footwear I’ll be right back, get everything together and meet me at the counter.”

She can’t help but roll her eyes at the clearly way too low cut for anything professional shirt he tossed to her. Skinner would probably not care about anything they did if she wore that to the office. She gathers up everything lays carrying it to the counter, she probably only needs 3 things if she is honest. But there at the counter is another stack of pajamas some fuzzy slippers some beautiful lingerie it makes her blush wildly. The lady at the counter just looks at her. She is scared for a moment of how this looks like Pretty Woman. The cashier looks at her and smiles.

“Guy said they lost your luggage, said to have you get this stuff too, even though you don’t need it. Because putting up with him is more than a 40 hour job and to consider it back pay.”

She is slightly shocked. But the cashier doesn’t seem to care and starts ringing everything up, the numbers are staggering. There is no way she can let Mulder pay for this, well maybe the stuff he picked out, whatever that’s not her problem. The green sweater is lightly folded on top, “wow this color goes really well with your complexion.”

She isn’t sure where Mulder is and the daunting amount that is showing in bright green is more than a little disconcerting. She feels a warm hand slide around her though.

“Phew, sorry, hey I got these, these are the ones you always have right?” her perfect white little reebok tennis shoes stare back at her with her favorite brand of socks in a big plastic white bag. Because of course he would know her favorite brand of socks.

“Mulder” she can only mutter as he pulls out his wallet and grabs a 20% off your entire purchase coupon.

She laughs, Mulder is a bad tipper, even though he grew up with money he doesn’t like to pay anything more than he has too. He shrugs hands over a credit card and touches the green sweater, he clears his throat.

“So you uh gonna wear that one tomorrow?”

“I thought you wanted me to wear that piece that has both my tits hanging out?” She replies with a smirk.

“No, no Scully that one you know is for… nevermind. Wear the green sweater tomorrow ok. Since I didn’t get to see you model it.”

“It looked good,” she replies.

“Yea well you would look amazing in a burlap sack Scully,” he thanks the cashier. Grabs the four giant bags as she rolls a new black sleek suitcase towards the exit.

#mulder and scully #fluff #season5ish?#myfic #the xfiles #txf fic #msr #fictober19

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dreammutual-remade · 6 years

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idol!you and lucas

request: please do a bullet scenario about lucas and his gf both being sm idols - anon

word count: 2.6k

a/n: first of all,,,, this gif hurts me badly, seCOND OF ALL im so sorry for the inactivity !! I have finals this week and I graduate really soon n ive just been v busy !!! also I had hella writers block trying to finish this ish up but I hope u like it anon !!!!its a lil hard for me to write as an idol just because thats such a Wildt lifestyle but I did my best ily

warnings: cursing n also some crying because god knows all of our boys prolly have during their idol days :(((((((

what’s up butter cup

let’s dive tf in

as a pre-warning thingy i’m making you a singer so i’m very sorry if you can’t sing i can’t either bby

alright so this story begins when you’re not even 16 years old and you audition for a bunch of companies

tbh you didn’t think you were /that/ good at singing or dancing but ???

all the companies wanted you??? you got offers from JYP and SM and Pledis ????? go off queen

we stan

anyways

you decide to go with SM since they produced leGENDS SHINEE

FUCK I LOVE THOSE GUYS

(binch if u went to JYP u literally could have been in TWICE ?!?/&.&. ABSOLUTE LEGENDS UR LOSS THOT)

also because you just think that’ll be best for you ?? idk we don’t judge here (i already did though i’m So Sorry)

on your first day as a trainee you’re in search of the female dorms and you just can’t find them

eventually you run into this,,,, Gang Of Adolescent Boys

they’re wearing dorky ass muscle tees and keep saying shit about “foreign swaggers”

(.... y’all already know who it is sjdkdkd)

and you’re Meek and New and Small so you’re like um, hellowherearethegirlsdormsplease

okay there’s four of them and they’re all fckin huge except for one

the Biggest One with the american accent points you in the right direction and you try to scurry away but end up smacking into the Second Biggest One’s arm because he moved in your way on accident ouchie

“god lucas why don’t you just run the poor girl over”

“hYUNG PLEASE”

“hehehhehe i’m just kiddin”

and you just kind of mumble that it’s fine and go on your way

okay so you train for three yEARS before your debut

and you def come out of your shell alright like you’re Extroverted and whatnot

you still see those boys and even make friends with mark and donghyuck and the Foreign Members

but the entirety of the group you met has debuted except Lucas

you’re not close but you wave and say hi when you see each other

you turn pink everytime from Emotions and also Holding Your Breathe Due To Anxiety

and he was cute years ago but he’s only gotten prettier with age dude

they recently dyed his hair to give him some Blonde Stuff and he looks reaLLY GOOD

LIKE TO THE POINT WHERE U HAVE TROUBLE LOOKING HIM IN THE EYE

but eventually you’re like hey now i’m a grown woman i can handle this giant childish man !!! quit that @ emotions

alright so you debut like, days before him no lie

you’re a solo artist bc idk

red velvet was full 😔🤟

anyways you’ve been filming the video for the past couple weeks and the concept is sort of filmy and shimmery like old sparkly anime water u kno ?

and you’re wearing similar stuff to what ten was wearing in the new heroes mv (BIG OOF) except less warm toned ?

like swishy sort of see through white shirts and spandex underneath

you’re a Beautiful and Skilled dancer so they have u all over the place with this choreo

on the FLOOR on the WALL in the AIR

no joke they had you in a harness doing cool swirly shit in the air this is the stuff of legends my g

but like the inside of SM ? is very cold

if you’re not filming you’re bundled up in a blanket and trying to rub the goosebumps out of your arms and legs

because you have to look all smooth and flawless for filming and those are two things goosies are not

luckily the song wasn’t a huge ballad because it’s rather hard to belt out long ass notes when you’re upside down lmao

anyways, the song is a bop and the mv is beautiful and you are wearing minimal clothing and although these are all nice things but also

RECIPE FOR DISASTER

the filming is almost done thank GOD

you’re taking a break from filming and you go out in the hall in your costume to go get another water bottle because ain’t nobody around to give a pre debut thot a water bottle 🤧🤧

your arms are wrapped around yourself when lucas jogs up behind you and throws his jacket around you??

literally throws it like you made an oof noise

“um ,? thank you that was aggressive”

“i knOw i’m sorry it’s just you are practically naked and it’s Cold in here and also walking behind you i noticed you were Very Exposed sO”

you turn bright red because that means everyone has seen your ass prolly and you duck your head and pull the jacket tighter around yourself

“oh! i’m sorry i mean you look uhh? really good ?? yeah you look good nOT that i was looking super hard or anything or that i uH saw aNything BUt if i did it would look good i’m sure nOT THAT I thInK about that ?$/&/“

and now you’re both blushing very hard but you feel a little better when you see he’s just as flustered as you

you brush your fingers on his forearm to get him to stop staring at the floor and tell him thanks and ask about when he’s debuting

he tells you the mv filming is done since they had to go Real Far Away to do it and get it done ahead of time and that the teasers will be out in three weeks and then the mv release and then its Show Time Baby

you’re excited for him and he’s excited and you debut really soon as well and he’s excited for you and !!!!!

there’s excitement all over the place

he’s smiling so big and his eyes are cute and crinkly and :(((((

you still got a crush on him /sigh/

one of the staff literally yells your name down the hall and you’re like aw shit that’s my cue lol

you leave him with with a lil squeeze of his bicep and you’re BOTH shook

him because ?? was that fLIRTING

you because ?? THAT WAS FLIRTING

also because his biceps are thicc i’m gonna cry

big baby stands there for like 3 mins just shook and with uwus oozing from his pores

you skrt very quickly to avoid the consequences of your actions and get back to filming

okay TIME SKIP

your mv was released and did GOOD AS FUCK

you didn’t hear it from me but lucas + nct boys were seen on vlive jamming the fuck out to your song

you’re backstage like 10 mins from going on and having an absolute panic attack

what if you trip ??? or your voice breaks !!:&::

what if all the reviews say you’re Trash live and that the mv was better since they edited

what if you FLOP AND HAVE NO FANS

NO ONE DOES THE FANCHANTS

FUCK FUXKFUCKFUXKCUDJ

so you do call the king of debuts

mark lee

and you’re like mARK FUCK IM GOING TO CRASH AND BURN PLEAS LLSSE DHELPD ME

he tells you to Calm The Fuck Down and assures you it’ll be fine but it’s not working and mark is but a young boy he don’t know how to deal with FEMALES

you hear some deep ass voice on the other side ask who’s on the phone and mark says your name and then the voice is closer and deMANDING to be given the phone

u already kno it’s our boy yukhei

he can hear you gasping through the phone and having a mental breakdown and immediately makes his voice all low and soft

wow i’m , affected writing this shit

“hey, y/n, listen to me, you’re okay, you’re fine. i promise it’ll be okay.”

“bUT WHAT IF I-“

“you won’t. you’ve worked too hard and practiced too much. i know you i saw you do it. do NOT let all of that go down the drain. you can do this. now get your cute ass out there and take NO SHIT”

“i know but i am, scared”

“don’t be! this is what you love isnt it?”

“i mean,,,, yeah”

“and you want to do this more than anything don’t you?”

“well , yeah”

“then for gods sake don’t be a wimp and do it”

“hey i miss the part of this conversation where you were being nice to me”

“that part’s over babe you need some TOUGH LOVE now please for me and for yourSELF get out there”

“okay.. thanks lucas”

“anything for you, angel”

yOU HANG UP SO QUICK

how dare he

you were all Comforted but then he went on with that angel bullshit

okay long story short you ended the industry dude

all solo artists BOW BEFORE YOU

VOCAL QUEEN

DANCE QUEEN

lucas: shaking because His Angel did so well and you were wearing white and actually looked like an angel

but you don’t see him for the next like twO MONTHS because he’s promoting boss and you’re promoting your single and neither of you are home ever

when you do get a second to yourself you try to send him an encouraging text but

you seldom get a second to yourself :(((

he does the same thing and they’re so sweet :(

“good morning i hope u slept well !!”

“princess don’t forget 2 hydrate”

“i saw ur mnet performance u looked beautiful <333”

this man is practically begging you to wife him up i mean

he’s cute

he’s BIG and WARM

very sweet to you :(

talented and lovely

absolute dweeb

supportive of you even from great distances

BEST BOY UWU

you try to be just as encouraging back because he deserves it UGH

“bub don’t forget to eat i know ur hungry rn”

“!!!!!! you came foR MY LUNGS WITH THAT CENTER DANCE AT THE END BOI”

“why are u sending me messages u need to rest bby :((“

when things calm down though you,, see each other

he doesn’t formally ask you out and you don’t say anything but, youre dating sort of kind of

as idols you’re both still so so busy and you JUST debuted so neither of you are really allowed to date anyways

you settle for little bits of cuddling and secret touches as you pass each other in the hall

you both stand outside of your respective dorms at night to facetime without waking your dorm mates

he desperately wants to go on dates and do Normal Couple things but there’s no time :(

the most affectionate you’ve ever been is when the girl group who shares a dorm with you was out promoting and you had him over and you took a nap together :((((

he Insisted upon being the big spoon and basically wrapped your whole body up with his limbs

pressed a few lil kisses to the back of your neck and your shoulder when he thought you were asleep

you weren’t though and you turned around to kiss him on the cheek and then tuck your face into his neck and pass tf out

he has to leave though because mark texts him and is like YO I KNO UR WITH Y/N AND HER ROOMMATES ARE ON THE WAY HOME

ABORT MISSION DUDE

and that’s pretty much it :(

months pass without much between you even though you’re trying your best

and even though you live in dorms you’re still so lonely especially when you’re traveling because you don’t have any group members

you don’t want to annoy or worry lucas though so you don’t complain

he notices though and late at night he’ll call you while you’re in bed and talk about his day and how he misses you and wishes you were there

and when you get all emo he says he’ll be waiting for you at the airport

(he really does he goes and hides in the bathroom and texts you so you can go in there and TACKLE HIM)

he still calls you angel all the time :((((

god that’s another weakness of mine ??? IM SUCH A WUSS

but it has specifically changed to “my angel”

uwu

your first kiss and first Real Confession happens on the Worst Day Of Your Life

you’re about to go on stage (you’ve released an album since your debut so this is new stuff) when you get a call from your mom ??

she’s crying and tells you your grandma is sick and in the hospital and it’s really bad

immediately you’re barely holding yourself together because that woman half raised you and was the reason you stayed in dance and worked so hard to become who you are today

there are tears streaming down your face already and the makeup team is fluttering around you trying to fix what you’re messing up and it’s bad

you still have to go on though so you go and perform with tears in your eyes and your manager yells at you after for not pulling it together

you go home in tears and then you’re not looking where you’re going and ran straight into a staff who yells at you some more for being some entitled idol brat

originally you weren’t gonna say anything to lucas but, the staff pushed you over the edge and you call him in tears and are incoherent and can barely tell him where you are before you hang up

our boy BURSTS into your room and sees you sitting on the floor with your face buried in your knees and 🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨 !!

he gathers you in his arms and sits on the bed with you curled up on his lap

he holds you close and rubs a comforting hand up and down your back at the same time as he frantically tries to figure out what’s wrong

“y/n?? baby what’s wrong? angel, please you gotta tell me or i cant help”

“i jjJJUST Got a cALL and my grandMA IS SICK AND THEN I DI D BAD AND DISAPPOINTED EVERYONE AND My mManageR yeYELLED at me and theN I RAN iNtO a staffF meMbEr and he yELled at me too and I JSUT .$:&:&;& i’m sO SORRY u doNT need to deAL WIYH ME you have problems of YouR own and-“

“shhh listen to me i always care about you okay? angel, i want to help you no matter what you know that. also, if you weren’t so distraught i would go beat some SM ass you didn’t deserve to be yelled at :(((( how about we call your mom and check for updates with your grandma and i’ll stay here with you for the night?”

you nod and then reach for your phone while keeping as much physical contact with lucas as possible

he’s the only reason you haven’t reached the Depression Point Of No Return so

we stayin close

you put your mom on speaker and set your phone down before squishing yourself back into his chest and sniffling while the phone rings

your mom answers and you shakily ask for any updates and she tells you not much but your grandma has improved and they think that within a couple weeks she’ll be better

you cry some more and tell her you love them both and you’re so relieved and lucas kisses the crown of your head and is just There For Comforting

once you hang up and you’ve calmed down a little more you back up a little and turn to face him

“hey thank you so much, you didn’t have to come and help me so much but you’ve always been there to make me stop Freaking Out and laugh and i just, love you. yeah that’s what it is. I LOVE YOU I AM IN LOVE WITH YOU, WONG YUKHE-“

he cuts you off by snatching your face in his big warm hands and kissing you right on the lips

he then kisses your nose and your forehead and pulls you back into his lap to tuck you under his chin

“it’s all for you, angel ;)))) i love you more”

#me: a connoisseur of shitty endings #uwu im so soft someone call me their angel right now immediately #lucas #wong lucas #wong yukhei #wong xuxi #nct #nct u #nct 2018 #nct scenarios #nct scenario #nct fluff #nct u scenarios #nct u fluff #nct 2018 scenarios #yukhei scenarios #yukhei fluff #Lucas scenarios #Lucas fluff

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dvndelionbear · 6 years

Text

long happy/looking back rant i guess

uh thinking about my partner moving here under 2 years, (yes tWO YEARS SAMMY WE DONT KNOW IF SOMETHING COULD COME UP OR NOT), is such a giant step in our relationship and like im nervous as fuck but also excited as fuck to be with them

people who know me probably are like 'wow you guys just got together 3 months ago or so' or 'didnt you guys use to be at each others necks?' yes that is true but ive known sam for 4+ years and been on and off with them before many times

this time just feels right with them and im really Content? where i am at with them and i can see them as a long lasting partner. we had a bad bAd past and both of us can agree on it and face it??? thats such a big fucking growth i cant even begin to explain how it is. it just is. we butt heads and still get uncomfortable/upset with things here and there but its not to the point one or both of us are sobbing or unstable like the last times?

we hold each other up way more and have been growing together and letting eachother have space when needed or comforted when needed and it feels. good. so fucking good.

this time im sure of it. i knew there had to be a reason i couldnt let go of them. and this is it. i feel content being with them and i dont feel as if i have to worry about getting hurt again.

im really excited that theyve made the decision to come to ohio. everything is going to change for the better.

#tagebuch

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sevens-evan · 6 years

Note

Skimmons and “please, you can’t die now!”

a/n: thanks for the prompt! this is pre-relationship, set between seasons 3 and 4. it falls under my usual headcanon that jemma and daisy kept in contact to an extent during the six month timeskip. i hope you like it.

send me skimmons prompts!

Daisy wakes up in a hospital bed. Not in a hospital, judging from the cracked ceiling above her that bulges just enough to be a bit disturbing, but definitely a hospital bed. She recognizes the feeling of thin, scratchy sheets, and that’s definitely a hospital gown she’s wearing.

“Don’t sit up,” a familiar voice says from beside her. Daisy turns her head, and wow, what did she do to herself this time? Even shifting her neck a few inches to the left hurts.

“Jemma,” Daisy mumbles, the words coming out a lot more slurred than she intended. “Where…?”

“We’re in a hotel room,” Jemma says, and Daisy’s eyes flit around as best they can. She is, indeed, in a hotel room, and the bed she’s in has been outfitted with hospital sheets. A distinctly DIY-looking IV pole stands beside her, and her gaze follows the clear tube hanging from it down into her arm. She tries to ask what it is, but her mouth is dry and gummy. “It’s morphine,” Jemma says. Daisy frowns. She doesn’t feel high. Groggy, certainly, but not the morphine high she knows from years of almost dying. “It’s closed right now,” Jemma explains, understanding Daisy’s confused look effortlessly. “I wanted to wake you up and see how you were.” Daisy licks her lips. It’s a fruitless motion; her tongue is as dry and useless as her lips.

“I’ll get you some water,” Jemma murmurs, gently pushing Daisy’s hair away from her forehead. “Can you sit up?” Daisy shifts and immediately groans in pain. She still doesn’t remember what she did, but she feels like she got hit by a semi. “I’ll get you some ice,” Jemma amends. “I’ll be right back.” She walks out of Daisy’s field of view. Daisy takes a deep breath, wincing. Definitely cracked a rib, she decides. Her arms are aching, too, but that’s nothing new. They always hurt these days.

“Here,” Jemma says, reappearing. Daisy blinks. That seemed a bit too fast, but she writes it off as the haze in her mind resulting from a mixture of pain and a residual morphine high. Jemma pulls a piece of ice out of a cup in her hand. Her hands are smooth-looking, her nails flawless. She holds it out, and Daisy lets her place it in her mouth, holding it there as it melts into water. She feels immediately better, and allows Jemma to feed her several more small pieces of ice before speaking.

“What happened?” Daisy asks. This time, her voice comes out clear and steady, if a bit quiet. Jemma sighs, setting the cup of ice on the bedside table.

“You almost died.” Daisy shakes her head and immediately regrets the movement.

“What happened?” she repeats, because almost dying is pretty much a weekly occurrence for her at this point, and Jemma is going to need to be a bit more specific.

“You fell,” Jemma says, and Daisy’s memories come rushing back. She’d been fighting a group of Watchdogs on a rooftop, she remembers, and she had been losing. They hadn’t had guns, but they had had pretty much everything else, and there had been a lot of them.

“I jumped,” Daisy corrects, and Jemma’s calm facade cracks apart. She rests her elbows on the side of the bed, letting her face fall into her hands. She makes a choked noise, halfway between a sob and a groan, and it makes Daisy’s chest hurt even more than it already does. “Jemma,” she says, pushing herself up a bit so she can see Jemma better, even though it makes her entire body ache to do so. “Jemma,” she says again. “I’m okay. It’s okay. I’m okay.” Jemma lifts her head from her hands. Tears are dripping down her face. Her eyes are red, and Daisy notices for the first time how incredibly exhausted she looks. Like her soul needs sleep.

“Four cracked ribs,” Jemma says, her voice high and fast. “A broken ankle. Deep tissue bruising all over your back and legs. Bone bruising on one elbow. A concussion so bad you’re lucky you can still see. Whiplash. Your arms—“

“I’m alive,” Daisy repeats.

“You’re not going to be next time!” Jemma shouts. The volume sends a jolt of pain through Daisy’s already-aching head. Jemma sees her wince, and subsides a bit. “You’re not going to make it next time,” she repeats, more quietly. “The only reason you’re alive right now is sheer luck. If I hadn’t planted a tracker on you last time—“

“You what?” Daisy interrupts. Jemma waves a hand dismissively.

“It tracks your vitals,” she says. “And it is the only reason you’re alive right now. You died, Daisy. You were dead for nearly two minutes before I got to you. If you hadn’t been in LA, if I hadn’t been nearby—“

“I get it,” Daisy cuts her off. “It won’t happen again.”

“Yes, it will,” Jemma says. “We both know it will. You’ll do something stupid and heroic and you’ll get yourself killed.” Daisy would shrug if it didn’t hurt to move.

“Isn’t that what you want from me?” she says. “To be a hero?” It’s uncalled for. Daisy knows that. But she also doesn’t regret saying it. It’s how she feels sometimes. Everyone, everyone wants something from her. Even Jemma. Jemma, who has looked at her with everything from curiosity to love to fear over the past few years, but who has never, never stopped looking at her expectantly.

“I want you to be alive,” Jemma snaps, her voice rising again. Daisy looks away. Jemma exhales, making a visible effort to stay calm, or at the very least, quiet. “I just…” She shakes her head, sniffling and wiping at her eyes. “I’ve already lost you enough. Not having you around is hard, even when I know you’re out there. You can’t die. You can’t.” Daisy reaches out, settling her hand that isn’t in a cast on Jemma’s. “Please, Daisy,” Jemma says, practically begging. “You can’t die now.”

“I’m not going anywhere,” Daisy says. “I promise.” The words ring hollowly in Daisy’s ears, and judging by the mournful look in Jemma’s eyes, she doesn’t believe them, either.

my ao3

#skimmons #daisy johnson #jemma simmons #agents of shield #aos #marvel #my fics #fic: skimmons #anon #answered

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tessaractwasp · 5 years

Note

1-140 question meme

wait you want me to do all of them?? Ok I guess (that actually makes me kinda happy lol)

3 Fears losing people, never getting away from home, and that everyone hates me

3 things I love music, reading, writing

2 turns on intelligence, muscular, socialism

2 turns off misogyny, speech impediments, capitalism

My best friend @queercedricdiggory

Sexual orientation not sure tbh. Maybe pan? Maybe lesbian? Who can say. Not me.

How tall am I 5′ 2 3/4″

What do I miss right now my friend Shannon who doesn’t want anything to do with me anymore

Favourite color purple

Do I have a crush yes

Favourite place nature. there’s a brook in the woods at the bottom of the hill I live on. its magical.

What am I listening to right now my spotify playlist “A Very Specific Mood Brought To You By Probably Non-Lesbian Lesbian Icons” currently Mitski’s “A Horse Named Cold Air”

Shoe size 6.5 usually

Eye color cockroach brown

Hair color brown/black (ft hidden rainbow)

Meaning behind my URL oh god I was like 15 when I made it so tesseract from the first avengers but tessaract bc my name is tessa, and wasp bc she was my favorite marvel character.

Favourite song favorite song????? uuuuuhhhhhhhhhh right now probably Mitski’s “Pink in the Night”

Favourite band pdofjsodifjolikdsjf uhm IDK my top artists rn are Mitski, Hozier and Florence + The Machine

How I feel right now frustrated.

Someone I love @azirahell

My current relationship status single and READY to flaMINGLE

My relationship with my parents hahahahahahahah better than most I guess. But strained af atm

Favourite season SPRING

Tattoos and piercing i have navel and ear piercings

Tattoos and piercing i want WAY more ear piercings, I wanna get that custom “constellation piercing” thing but $$$$ also tattoos for each of my immediate family members (so far a turtle and elephant on opposite ankles, a power symbol on the back of my neck probably, an origami rose on one tricep, a wolf silhouette on the other)

The reasons I joined Tumblr fandom probably? and peer pressure. thx nadia

Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts? only when Im actively texting someone when we go to bed

Have I ever kissed the last person you texted? I dont know have you? (Im kidding, I think I have tho)

How long does it take me to get ready in the morning? depends on where Im going. Anywhere from 5 mins to like 1.5 hrs lmao. But on average, probably 20 mins

Have you shaved your legs in the past three days? I haven’t shaved my legs in the past three years

Where am I right now? My living room

Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level? LOUD

Do I live with my Mom and Dad? yes

Am I excited for anything? not really atm

Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to? if by sex you mean gender then yes

How often do I wear a fake smile? lmao all the fuckin time

If I could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be? wow uuhhhhhhh I dont know! maybe Lana Parrilla lmao idk honestly!

What do I think about most? how much i suck lmfao

Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it? I guess behind, but I dont mind being in front

What was the last lie I told? oh god Im taking care of my little siblings i have no idea

Do I perfer talking on the phone or video chatting online? depends on the person but usually video chatting

Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens? no, yes

Do I believe in magic? not really

Do I believe in luck? depends on the day

What’s the weather like right now? warm. It’s almost 80, but its getting dark out so it feels nice.

What was the last book I’ve read? rn Im in the middle of Scythe by Neal Shusterman (bc hes putting my name in the third book in the series!!)

Do I have any nicknames? Tess, T, T-Cake, Tessticle

Do I spend money or save it? SPEND lmao

Can I touch my nose with a tounge? no

Favourite animal? hmmm I guess dog

What was I doing last night at 12 AM? lying on the couch on tumblr

What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it? oh boy idk

What is my favorite word? people have favorite words?

My top 5 blogs on tumblr bruh idk I dont pay attention to anything

If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say? be fucking decent already

Do I have any relatives in jail? not at the moment that Im aware of

What is my current desktop picture? Thranduil Tauriel and Legolas lol

Had sex? depends on ur definition

Bought condoms? GLOW IN THE DARK

Gotten pregnant? nope

Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain? no

Had job? yes

Smoked weed? yes

Smoked cigarettes? no

Drank alcohol? yes

Am I a vegetarian/vegan? no

Been overweight? technically I think? But not really

Been underweight? yes

Gotten my heart broken? yes

Been to prom? yes

Been in airplane? well yea but I was 4 so I dont remember it so I dont count it

Learned another language? bruh i tried

Wore make up? yes

Dyed my hair? yes

Had a surgery? yes

Met someone famous? yes

Stalked someone on a social network? who hasnt??

Been fishing? yeah but I dont really remember it

Been rejected by a crush? yes

What do I want for birthday? Idk dude thats so far away

Do I like my handwriting? sometimes

Where do I want to live when older? i have no idea

Have I ever got caught sneaking out or doing anything bad? never snuck out but yeah Ive been caught doing “anything bad”

What I’m really bad at everything lmao. Sports I guess

What my greatest achievments are my writing probably

The meanest thing somebody has ever said to me one time when I was like 14 my mom and I were arguing and she told me it wouldnt be long before I was selling myself on the streets of new york

What I’d do if I won in a lottery ugh pay off my debt and buy a few of the things i want the most

What do I like about myself hairrr

My closest Tumblr friend like tumblr-only? probably leakedinlondon bc shes the only person ive ever talked to on tumblr lmao

Any question you’d like? what

Are you outgoing or shy? yes

What kind of people are you attracted to? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ femme wlw mostly i guess???

Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? no but i wish

Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? no

Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? my friend Kate who lives in AZ now :(

What does the most recent text that you sent say? “Yeah I just did, nothing yet”

What are your 5 favorite songs right now? Mitski, “Nobody” Florence + The Machine, “Grace” Hozier, “Wasteland, Baby” Mitski, “Pink in the Night” Mitski, “Strawberry Blond” in no particular order

Do you like it when people play with your hair? YESS

Do you think there is life on other planets? yes

Do you like bubble baths? yes but has tiny tub :(

Do you like your neighbors? i dont really know most of them but the ones I do, yeah for the most part

Where would you like to travel? All over the place, but Cuba more than anything

Favorite part of your daily routine? cuddling w my doogggggg

What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? muffin toppp

What do you do when you wake up? try to go back to sleep

Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? yes

Do you ever want to get married? idk maybe

If your hair long enough for a pony tail? lmao yea????

Would you rather live without TV or music? TV

Have you ever liked someone and never told them? yea

What are your favorite stores to shop in? theres this little like toy store but it has so many funny or adult things that I love. Its called Play

Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? not everyone

Do you smile at strangers? usually

Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? only in my dreams (like literally, I dont want ppl to know what I did in my dreams)

Ever wished you were someone else? always

Favourite makeup brand? dont have one

Last thing you ate? chicken and pasta

Ever won a competition? For what? yeah, a writing competition

Ever been in love? i dont know

Facebook or Twitter? facebook

Twitter or Tumblr? tumblr

Are you watching tv right now? no

What colour are your towels? purple

Favourite ice cream flavour? cookies and cream

First person you talked to today? my lil brother Ben

Last person you talked to today? talking to both my lil sibs rn

Name a person you hate? fucking CHRIS

Name a person you love? Rebecca <3 ( @parkour-margaret)

Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now? chris always

Do you tan a lot? BURNN

Have any pets? FOUR

Do you type fast? relatively yeah

Do you regret anything from your past? OH yeah

Ever broken someone’s heart? idk

Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt? YUP

Is cheating ever okay? it really depends on the situation but 98% of the time no

Do you believe in true love? yeah. but not just one. everyone can have more than one

What your zodiac sign? aries

Do you believe in ghosts? this question was already asked? no

Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? “‘Never mind, do not weep,’ answered the frog, ‘I can help you, but”

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stay-trash-2017 · 5 years

Text

Kim Kayhyun was a girl from a rough past. Her parents broke up when she was only a few months old, her mom is a hard working asshole. Her father was disabled, not disabled in the way you think. He broke his shoulder in a car accident when he was in a car accident with his 5 year old Kayhyun. A few years later he got in another car accident with his girlfriend at the time and fucked up his brain. He cant talk or think as fast as he used to. He has a new girlfriend though, Park Demyuna. She has two daughters who just happen to be kayhyun's favorite people. Her two daughters names are Park Karajin and Jung Runjyun. Runjyun is 11 and karajin is 14 almost 15. Kayhyun is only 14 and has already been put through hell. She has a little brother Hwang Xanie who just turned 8. Kayhun was very greatful for what she had no matter what but her parents did piss her off quite alot. Her school life wasnt any better, sure she had a few good friends who loved her to death but she hated everyone else. Kayhyun's best friend Min aniha and her boyfriend Jeona Jigsew would basically fuck in the middle of the hallway, it is very gross.

KAYHYUN'S POV

Ive really only has every had one crush in my life time, his name is Bang Chan. He was tall and had the most lucious brown curls in his hair. His dimples so deep you could swim in them, his eyes were so soft and caring, and his voice makes me melt. Its like honey, better yet an angel. I only know this because a little while ago we both auditioned for a music company called JYP, he and i both became trainees and we found a new friend ship through that. He is the sweetest person on earth but every one know the biggest smile hides enormous amounts of hurt. Chan had been through almost as much as i had been through. He came to Seoul in the 3 rd grade and he was constantly picked on because he is from Australia and didnt speak fluent Korean. Once he was fluent people started making shit up about him and he didnt deserve it. The worst thing that ive heard being said to him was that he was going to get dropped faster than a hot potato from JYP. He dosent seem like he takes it to heart but as one of his best friends, i can confirm he definitely does. I have a small group of friends, there is Han Jisung, Seo Changbin, and Chan they are also trainees . I am so lucky to have them through everything. While going to practice everyday after school, we made some new friends. Chan found a new family that he could depend on instead of his own fucked up life. Chan met Kim Woojin, Lee Minho, Hwang Hyunjin, Lee Felix who was also Australian, Kim Seungmin, and Yang Jeongin. They are all so sweet, they have been to hell and back with their own experiences. Woojin was a year older than Chan, Jisung, Changbin, and I.

Woojin had pupes man, this boy could belt some notes, he is a giant teddy bear. I remember once i was sad because my boyfriend had broken uo with me and told me horrible thing. I hurt myself and it sure as hell scarred but when woojin saw the scars he hugged me tight and made me promise i would never do that again, i agreed because i was extremely ashamed of myself for letting a boy push me that far. Woojin is an all around great guy.

Minho was a Mean Hoe. He only teased me and his fellow trainees because he cared about us. He used to be a back up dancer for the imfamous boyband Bangtan Sonyeondan. Minho aasnt ashamed to have danced for them but it did cause some self doubt issues when he became a JYP trainee. He was convinced he was too fat or not strong enough, when in reality he couldnt come to realize that one day he would rise to Bts's level. He was always there for everyone especially Jisung, He had grown VERY close to Jisung.

Hyunjin is an amazing little soft person. He and Jisung shared the same voices, no, not schizophrenic voices. The voices that told them they werent good enough to be a JYP trainee, these voiced told them to do horrible things to them selves. Hyunjin has the scars on his thighs to show. He never wanted to do it but the voices overwhelemed him one night and found himself in a bathtub of cold water. Long, deep, thin lines that covered his thighs.

Felix is another Aussie boy, him and Chan both born in Sydney. Felix was teased back home for wanting to be an Idol. He was told to kill himslef and that he would never be good. Felix had friends back home, not all of them true but when he was only 15 he moved to Seoul and started learning Korean to become a successful idol. He grew to some what love himself when he met the boys. He truly loved them. Especially Changbin

Kim Seungmin had never been bullied but he was abused. He lives with his Meth head aunt, and dont get me wrong all the boys do very much worry bout how permanent the roof over his head was. Seungmin did his best not to ask for much because his aunt thought she gave him the world. Where in reality he only had a bed, a blanket, and a phone he bought and payed for himself. He was very greatful for what he had and tried his very bets to stay on his aunts good side, most of the time he was but i prefer not to talk about the bad times.

Jeongin was the baby of the group. He had a great life, or as far as i know. He hasnt really opened up with me yet but i dont want to force him into something he isnt comfortable with.

Well now that you do know who the boys and how they came to be who they aee today lets continue...

It was lunch period and Chan, Jisung, and Changbin ran off without me. I was angry but not to mad they were probally writing new music for the group. I decided to listen to my music and write a poem. I got situated at our usual lunch table and pulled out my notebook. I grabbed my phone and my ear buds and started playing Day6, I turned the volume all the way up to drown out any noise from the rest of the cafeteria. I wrote to my hearts content. Poetry was my way of letting out any sadness or anger. The notebook was yanked away and my head shot up to see, Im Sarang. She hated me for no reason. I jumped up and tried to grab the book from her well manicured hands, but it didnt help that i am only 4'9 and she is 5'11 plus the 4 inch heels she was wearing, in all imagine a 4 foot 9 girl dressed in dark colors jumping 2 inches off the ground reaching for a notebook being held by a giant. Sarang prefered to be called Sara. Sara was popular but she was NOT pretty. She looked like Filipino man in a messy blonde wig, with fucked up eye liner and a pale pink off the shoulder top ( i think certain people get that refrence). Sara slapped me down to the ground and thats when, I lost it. I didnt hit her back but I did stay on the floor teary eyed as sara read out the poem i was writing to the entire cafeteria.

"I’ve been thinking ‘bout my life

Is it better if I die

Before I fall asleep forever

I'm trying to find feeling within this nothingness

I’ve been thinking ‘bout my life

Is it better if I die

Before I fall asleep forever

I'm trying to find feeling within this nothingness"

Sara looked at me a laughed. She gave me a look pure disgust and hatred, thats when I had enoungh. I sat up and snatched the notebook from her hands and grabbed my bag and ran out of Cafeteria. I was running down the hall way when i collided with a man. I fell hard on my butt, i felt my head slam against the hard tile floor. I let out a final sob before the man came to my side, my vision cleared after all the tears had left my eyes. Park Jaehyung. He was the guitarist of the Band Day6. They had already debuted but he was still needing to go to school.

"Oh my gosh! Im so sorry!" He said very apologetically. He reached for my hands to help me up. I sniffed and looked him in the eyes and started crying again.

"Yo hey ey, whats wrong?"

"Sara, she makes my life a living hell when all i want is to be left the hell alone when it comes to my inner thoughts!"

"Ugh . . . Sara is my Best friend Byron's sister. If you think she is bad to you, she calls me OPPAR. Me and the rest of my band. She is so annoying. Dont let her get to you. She is just jealous because all the actually hot guys swoon over you instead of her." What Jae had said made sense but im not pretty.

"Shut up, im not pretty. " you managed to say.

"Youre damn right. Youre gorgeous." He said while taking your hand in his. He starred deep into my eyes and kissed me. And wow. Was he some kisser? I didnt feel awkward and stiff, i felt sparks.

His lips pressed against mine was the best feeling in the world. Our lips mold together and I feel his hand slip to my hip and pull me closer. I wrap my hand around his neck and pull him into me. He pulls away and rests his forehead on mine and i feel great. I hear a throat clear from beside me, and i look over to see Chan dressed nicely with Changbin and Jisung on both side of him. They are holding what seemed like a million lavender roses. Chan looks at me with hurt and dissapointment in his eyes. He walks up to me and places a small rectangular box in my handm without saying a word he turns around and walks out.

Oh boy what have I gotten myself into...

#bang chan #changbin #han jisung #hwang hyunjin #kim woojin #lee felix #lee minho #park jaehyung #dowoon #day6 #brian kang #stay dont stray #sungjin #stray kids #wonpil #bryronvids #kboo #south korea

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