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#ah-hah it's been awhile since I posted art
neillesart · 1 year
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"You should be paying attention to the real threat in front of you..."
When a certain Bard that has multi-classed as a Storm Sorcerer is ignored in battle after dealing ridiculous amounts of damage.
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cawolters · 4 years
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December...? DECEMBER!?
What about September?
November?
October?? What did I miss??
Yes, well, no you didn’t miss any vitals updates. I have reasons for why I haven’t been active on tumblr, and the most honest reason is that I didn’t feel like writing and posting on here since spring.
The writeblr community is so so great, one of the best in the web, but the platform is driving me nuts. Flagging, shadow bans, tag dysfunction and draft erasing/crashing, have just completely smashed my love for making fun and elaborate posts.
However, lots of updates has been made and i keep seeing wips I want to tag list and people i want to hang out with, so I’ll stick around for another decade or so! Hashtag always lurking.
The more polite reason for my absence, and equally truthful I might add, is that I was very busy the last few months —COMMISSIONS! LIFE! IRL NETWORKING!
And now I’ll tell you about it all, starting by answering the Q on everyone’s tongue:
1) Is Flash Fiction Friday Getting Revived in 2020?
In short, yup.
I need it, you need it, the world needs it. We need to WRITE folks. And the lovely prompt Friday will be back with week no 30 (!!) on:
Friday the 10th of January!
I have a capable team of creative and lovely writeblrs on the job as to how we an ensure consistent posting —and just and FYI, we might even end up with giving the FFF it’s own blog.
Run free, be with the people my beautiful prompt creature, inspire! And give me something to read!!
Stay tuned for updates and tell me is you want to be added to the FFF tag list.
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Now next up is my scrip update!
2) Querying ‘The Serpent Kiss’
All is well in the land of querying.
or... well almost.
Alrighty, lemme explain below.
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So, if you’ve been following me for awhile, you know my third child (whom is not currently teething or using my lipstick as a crayon) is my dark new adult fantasy trilogy —The Serpent Kiss <3
If you donno what I’m talking about, here’s a quick summery of the query process:
I finished the English first draft, two and a half years ago (I think?) and started looking into querying after my fifth draft was done.
I decided very early on that I would feel more comfortable working here in Denmark, where I already have a literary network, and actually understand the cultural unwritten rules when working with publishers!!
Since then I have been rewriting, tweaking, had beta-readers, editors, a sponsored translator (who translated the script from English to danish) BEFORE I started querying seriously in Denmark.
During the time where the book was being reviewed, I’ve kept in touch with houses who showed interest in the book from the get go (encouraging me to push onward), done a lot of social media work (especially on Instagram since the publishers all mentioned the importance of that platform) and attended books cons to physically mingle (it makes a difirence —really).
Ah, and now, finally, we’ve starting to get serious replies back from the Danish publishers.
Let’s look at what they’ve said so far.
(And mind you, this is Denmark. We’re a tiny country and we DON’T have adult fantasy books written by danish authors, so their critique is based on that. YA is what’s sellable and had been for years, buuut I also know that tendency will shift, so that’s what I’m really selling. A new trend basically. Always understand what pov the critique is coming from and don’t stop at the first rejection)
3/5: ‘no thank you, there’s no marked in Denmark for your book’
1/5: ‘we love it but rewrite it to YA and we have a deal’ — I said, no thank you
1/5: ‘we love it as is and we want to give you a deal, but we have to work out the legal kinks, and we will give you final answer by the end of January!’
So I’m awaiting the final judgement!!
But not really, it’s not the final judgement. If the deal falls through, and it might, never pop champagne before signing, I still have four more houses I could send the book to here in Denmark.
And, I could still go the international route and query over seas.
Yup! That’s the update on that!
Next up? The general writing!
3) A Year Of Author
“It’s really hard being a writer... Not on the days where you’re writing, but on the days where you’re not!”
— @CAlisaWolters, Instagram confessions
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My year of full time professional writing, meaning mainly relying on my text/skill/art to heave in the cash, is six months down and going — OK!!
Here’s what I’ve learned/done so far:
I’m writing 4-7h on commissions, the second book of the trilogy, short-stories, poetry and another little YA project every day. Yes. Every day. And that’s very very cool and also exhausting mentally. My advice to others: HAVE OBLIGATORY DAYS OFF! (Oh yea and I also won nanowrimo but the project is a secret shh).
I’m somewhat alone most of the time but being a closeted introvert, I don’t mind, but I miss coworkers. That’s why Café dates and write-ins with writer pals IS IMPORTAINT.
Also! Speaking of socializing, I’ve been to five writers cons/events and I definitely recommend making it a priority for all professional authors. BRING BUSINESS CARDS!!
I have a set routine and I’m really happy with it! Early mornings is the best! And Monday is where I don’t write, but keep up with social media and answer mails and run errands! MAKE A ROUTINE!
And that’s the update on THAT!! Phew I’m getting winded, are you? Fear not we one have one last thing to cover. Promise.
4) Personal Life and Drag Kings ^_^
Where to start? Ah I know! I’ll start with the drag king storytelling event because that’s really what stands out!
I’m a mom, a wife, a bisexual, a general theatrical person and a genderfluid jellyfish who uses she/her pronounces, so when someone booked me for a storytelling event, I decided to go in drag. Naturally. Tsh duh.
I’ve really been experimenting with my gender this year, playing with apperence and comfortzones, and discovering that my real happiness lies somewhere between flooofy dresses and black buttondowns. And not just the clothes, but there attitude, the demeanor, the mental space of wearing cologne!! It might not sound dramatic, but to me it’s been A RIDE!
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(I’ve been dying to go full drag for a long looooong time and I should’ve gone all out on the makeup —but next time!!! Also the event went so so well and I had the best time! I’m going to do it again!)
And NOW I’m done! Hah not really, but I won’t force you to spend all day reading my updates and this post is already so loooong 💕💕✨💕
The new year looms!! May it bring you love and confidence, and lots of new opportunities!!
Hug hug hug!!
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~Ciao
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daee-archive · 6 years
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One Wing
Was originally posted on my art blog. First short story for an assignment in class that I’ve done. Follows the mentor of my Dnd character and their first meeting. It’s not perfect but it’s a start.
Our story begins in a tavern off the coast of Shinklesberg, a small port village off in the shadows of tall ice capped mountains. The people here are of friendly sorts, warm people with kind hearts and full belly laughs. Walking down the snow covered port one could find a plethora of merchants shouting chants and sales pitches; making playful jibes at each other all throughout. The smell of hot soup, warm ale and sweet, sweet sugar chasing out most of the frigid temperature. It’s not often that a large ship will pull in, what with all the ice and slush around not many a sailor would chance pulling in; even if it was the only port for miles. Many a sailor would avoid such a place for withall the seemingly happy and pleasant company there was a dark sadness hanging in the air. This however, did not stop the merry band of merchants and sailors on the Vilkshen. The townsfolk of Shinklesberg gathered round as the big ship pulled in, chittering and chattering away. Many a gold endowed seller of this or that bustled off. Shifty looking peddlers of potions, poisons and other provisions - refined and haughty jewelry sellers, you name it and they appeared.  One such merchant was a small man, Dwarven it would seem. He wore fitted leather clothing, worn and slightly stained with oils and dust. His hands, calloused and dry were wrapped along the knuckles as if he needed extra protection. His heavy steel toed boots stomped across the wooden boards, muted brown beard swinging as he went. By the look in his eyes, a storm was brewing inside him, just waiting to be released. He made his way through the crowds toting a large satchel of wares, his short swept back hair frosting in the cold, wet air. His frown deepened, he hated the cold.
 The man continued down path after path, taking short cuts and little alleyways leading further and further into the deep crevices of Shinklesberg. Eventually he stopped, in a dank and musty alleyway, the smell of wet soil and ale in his nose. A single candle lit up a old decrepit door - iron bars along the look through window. He knocked once, twice and finally one third solid strike. The wooden peephole slid open, yellow eyes piercing blinking hazily into view.
“Whatsit want?” the nasally voice on the other side slithered out. Diamond eyes dilating slightly, darting back and forth. The Dwarven merchant snorted loudly through his nose, gruffly murmuring out, “same as it always is, business” The yellow eyes did one last slow slide before contracting abruptly, as if the owner had come to a sudden realization “ ah- ye the.. the Dwarven fella - making big money and all that. almost didn’t recognize ya with the short locks and such…” a loud clamoring was happening behind the door as he fumbled around getting the door open. “ I can't, remember ye name right now but I swear it's on the tip of me tongue!” The door widened to reveal a tall skinny reptile man - Dragonborn, standing in the way. Unlike others of his kind, this one was wiry and seemed to twitch like a rat waiting to run. He dressed similarly to the Dwarven man, all leather and worn, but the clothes didn't fit right and seemed almost to be put on as an afterthought. The man sighed, pushing past the reptile, “For the last time, Nadarr, my name is Yenfire.” Nadarr paused his closing of the door, head ticking back and forth, seeming to think it over “Yenfire… Yenfire… OH!” He slammed the door, rushing to lock it “Yenfire Giant Crippler!” Yenfire Frowned, “No! for the last time that's not my-” Nadarr brushed past him bustling down the hall, “Buisness been good, as usual for these parts. Got this n’ that to sell and this n’ that to fight!” Yenfire followed closely behind him, down stairs and passageways, keeping pace but growing irritated by the minute. “got a real good lot this time around, some real spitfires. Yer going to have a good go I’d say!” Pushing open the double doors before him, they entered what seemed to be an arena. Roughians and other shady folk lined the walls and the place stunk of blood and sweat. Yenfire dropped his satchel near the door, making his way around the ring. It had been awhile since he had been to this particular port, a port seemingly all soft bellies and happy laughter. No, he supposed it was those things, but underneath there was a more vicious and hard beast. The ring, the gambling and the black market and that is what he came here for. Yenfire Giantcrippler as he was known in this particular port - is a well seasoned fighter in the ring and a pusher of rather dangerous and rare goods. He got his name for the amount of times he's taken people quite literally 10 sizes bigger than him and won. It was not hard really, when everyone here has fought each other and has gained an inflated sense of pride. Today he would scope out the competition and rest up for the championship to in the next few weeks. He had no qualms about taking a day off to explore. He cracked a small smirk as he looked at the rough and tumble people around him, laughing, punching and getting riled up. Making his rounds however, he noticed a small group - teenagers it would seem corralled in the corner; laughing and jeering. This in fact was not unusual but something in his gut told him to go check, loud groups like that always lead to trouble. Now trouble, is not something Yenfire would normally go looking for, after all if it’s not profitable to him why bother? The amount of downtime he had that evening simply brought him to the conclusion that he could stand for some entertainment.
Popping his head in between the crowd, what he saw made his blood run cold. It was a child, a Tiefling child, probably no older than 13 being held down by an older human girl. Yenfire was aware of the wary feelings had about Tieflings, what with their demonic heritage and rather ruthless upbringings, this however was strange even in his mind. The tiefling child was snarling and sobbing at the same time, seemingly at war with themselves. They bucked wildly under the bigger child trying to get away. The older child was jeering at the tiefling making taunts and pulling at the child's wing. “One wing! Failure of a demon! your such a disgrace, ain’t nobody gunna be afraid O’ a freak like you!” She pulled harder on the small tiefling and the tiefling went still as the back of her shirt went ripped. There along the curve of their left shoulder was a scar, where their other wing should have been. The scar tissue was too clean and surgical for the removal to be an accident. The human girl stared for a moment longer before gesturing at the crowd of children, “well lookit here… One wing only got one wing because someone took it! HAH, a big bad tiefling, that couldn’t even stop someone from taking her wing? Ye know, me mom always said - this have to be even and equal…” the crowd Oooed and awwed as she brought out a knife. “Let me help you make it even” The knife made an ominous twinkle as the girl brought it down, before the strike could be made however, a large calloused hand had wrapped around hers. “Haven’t you done enough Marigold?” Yenfire stood over the two, hand around the girls, keeping it in place. She glared up for a moment before going pale, “m-mr. Yenfire sir! I didn’t do much I swear!” She scrambled off the Tiefling child who curled up and tried to be as small as possible. Yenfire wrapped his knuckles across the back of Marigold's head “Run along, I don’t want to see hide or tale of you for the rest of the evening” He turned to the crowd of other teenagers and children and shooed them away as well. When he went to check on the Tiefling child however he found them already gone, he snorted. Well, atleast it was less trouble than he thought it would be, he wouldn’t run into that child again anyway.
The morning haze brought a certain freshness to the town, little rays of light bouncing off the morning dew and frost. As Yenfire strolled along the alleyways he felt a gaze upon his back, it was slight but heavy. He sighed, if someone wanted to ambush him they might aswell get it over with. He continued on his way, ready for the pursuer to finally attack but they stayed at a distance - curious. The alleyway he was traversing abruptly opened up to the open market, the hustle and bustle of customers and sellers bringing life to the otherwise quiet town. Stopping at an empty stall in the middle of the marketplace Yenfire began unloading his more legit wares and organizing his stall. All the while the gaze never left him.
    About midday when the sun was high in the sky and the cold frost of the port was dulled by the rays he noticed a shift in the bushes adjacent to his stall. Whoever had been watching him seemed to be getting bored. He kept one eye on the bush as he called out to the marketplace goer’s pushing his wares. This continued on for days. Each day he would venture out to the marketplace to sell his stock, and each day he would be followed. When night hit and the town came alive with the nightlife the gaze would disappear and he would left alone until the next morning. Towards the end of the day, not even a week after his initial day here a rustle caught his eyes from the bush of his supposed stalker; a moment later and then a small head popped out of the side, blue as the night sky and full of leaves, skin the same light brown of clay and piercing green eyes turned towards him. It was the Tiefling child from the ring.
    Looking at them now they seemed to be less roughed up but no less distressed. The child, a girl, looked to and fro before scuttling up to his stall. He glanced around for a moment, they seemed to have been waiting for a lull in his patronage. Her tiny hands reached out to him and she produced one single gold coin. He laughed lightly, “Well then, what do you want to buy child?” She nervously glanced back and forth, whispering “ I would like you to…” He leaned over, as she seemed to get more quiet. “I’d like you to teach me to- to fight…” her eyes closed and her hands shaking she held that gold coin out. He stepped back from the stall counter, staring at her. Coughing lightly he brushed his beard “ Not sure what you're talking about child. I am but a simple merchant.” she looked up, acid eyes alight in confusion “but you were-” he reached across the counter shushing her “I wasn't anywhere, you didn’t see anything. now hurry along.” she frowned slowly, nodding her head and running into one of the alleyways; disappearing out of sight. Rocking back on his feet Yenfire scrubbed a hand down his face, fluffing out his beard. He had a bad feeling that this would not be the last he would see of her.
    And he would be right, over the next week she would brazenly follow him out in the open. Every downtime he had was full of her bringing him trinkets or stories to trade for “just one lesson!”. No matter how he cursed at her or shooed her away she would be back almost twice as determined. Quite frankly it was annoying. He knew he shouldn't have gone over there, trouble was never a good in the end, even if it was entertaining for a bit. Yenfire only likes 2 things in life, money and fighting; not children and not definitely not nosy children. Stomping down the alleyway to the ring he stopped abruptly, the small child smacking into his back. He turned around and although she was slightly taller than her in stature, he towered over her in presence.
“look kid, you need to stop. buzz off, scram, be literally anywhere but around me” She puffed up in retaliation, “no! y-you need to teach me!” he scowled poking her with on stern finger in the chest “I, don’t need to do anything. You are not my responsibility and if I had it my way, I never would have saved you in the first place!” He stood there huffing, waiting for a reaction from her; some sign that she understood that she couldn’t keep following him. For a moment she trembled as if she might cry there on the spot and he braced himself for her to become a sobbing mess. Swapping out with one small and angry fist she pounded wildly into his chest “Why! Why won’t you help me?!” Her voice scratching with emotion. With each hit he found himself getting pushed back farther and farther. He figured this strength was a Tiefling attribute. Grasping her hands he forced them to the side, “look. I don’t know what you want from me, but as far as I’m concerned, you don’t need me to teach you anything. You have enough strength already!” She reared her head back screaming at him “I don’t need strength I can’t control! I want you to teach me control - I saw you, you could have crushed her hand, broke it even! But you didn’t…I… can’t do that. If I fight back they won’t get back up...”. Letting her drop to the ground he watched her sob. Yenfire was not a man to be swayed by tears or sympathies, he should let her cry it out and be on his way. Honestly there was no reason to help her, no money in it and no entertainment. And yet…
    For the next month, Yenfire could be seen running through the streets, a small shadow at his back. He had agreed to train her, as long as she could keep up with him. So, day after day he would train; pushups, daggers, running, it was a new regimen every other day. For the most part his little trainee couldn’t keep up, not that he could blame her. She seemed to be okay strength wise, her control was getting better, agility was sufficient, but her confidence in her body and movements is what crippled her. He kept her busy most days playing with his smaller daggers, she seemed to like the quick movements; darting here and there. On one occasion while he lifted some sandbags she had come skidding into the training room with some strange contraption of a whip crudely wrapped around the dagger, he hadn’t been paying much attention to her babbling but she left him alone to workout for more than 20 minutes so he figured it was worth it. As the days turned into weeks and the weeks into months, the championship was finally on the horizon. Yenfire and the girl arrived at the ring quite early, grabbing good seats for both the spectating and involvement of the fights. The girl sat in the seats, swinging her legs as Yenfire went to sign himself up. A boot slammed down next to her, Marigold at the end of it. “well well well, if it isn't one wing. come here to get yer ass beat?” the girl flinched, glancing over at Yenfire, who seemed to be in a heated discussion with the register. “n-no, I’m just here to watch Teacher Yenfire compete.” Marigold rolled her eyes “well thats too bad, this years about teams you see, young n’ old. If you're not his partner I can't think of anyone else who would want to fight with him, no matter his reputation.” The girl looked over at Yenfire once more as Marigold continued, “but you wouldn’t stand the stage with ol Yenfire, would ya? after all you're just a worthless one winged freak. Me n’ My cousin would wipe the floor with you and him” with those parting words and a sneer in her direction, Marigold sauntered off. Not five minutes later, Yenfire returned, a frown on his face. “Bad news kid, they're doing some kind of tag team thing this year. A newbie and a seasoned fighter have to team up, and unfortunately for me, I don’t know many people around here besides you and other seasoned fighters.” He ruffled her hair a bit, her blue locks bouncing around, “guess you won’t get to see me in action then.” He stepped over the bench to start packing their gear when the girl tentatively murmured “I, I could be your teammate...” Yenfire paused, side eyeing her “oh? you could, could you?” She looked up at him, determination lighting her eyes. “Yeah, Yeah i could, we can beat everyone here. Including Marigold and her weird cousin.” Yenfire belted out a shocked laugh “If that isn’t the most confident thing I’ve ever heard you say!” His hand slammed down on her head one more time, bringing her into a headlock. “alright kid, let's give this a go” and so the two marched up to the register again, standing side by side. The registrar, a thin, severe looking elven woman stood unamused. “What is it this time Yenfire, I already told you, no partner, no fight.” Yenfire pushed the girl in front of him, gesturing “Well, my dear, here is my partner” The elven woman tipped her glasses, looking the girl over “Very well, and your partner’s name is?” Coughing lightly Yenfire came to the realization that he hadn’t ever actually called her name; just hey you, kid, runt and other things. The girl stood up straighter, throwing her shoulders back and her head held high. “ My name is Kithri Skywood, and I am the Giantcripplers apprentice!” The registrar looked unimpressed and simply ushered them to the side with the rest of the contestants.
    The rules were simple, each team has 5 minutes to incapacitate or ring out the other.  Weapons are allowed but no lethal force was permitted. Round after round commenced until they finally got to the second to last round. the previous round was won by Marigold and her cousin, they had dominated that round and quite literally thrown the competition out. Yenfire and Kithri finishing up their round with a knockout. The crowed went wild as the Marigold team and the Yenfire team stepped onto the ring once more. the Marigolds were a hometown favorite, but Yenfire was also well known to be quite the tankard. Although most rounds Kithri helped in ways she could, for the most part he didn't need her at all. It was both impressive and disheartening for Kithri. Once the bell rang to commence the match, the marigolds sprang into action, the older of the two, Joine Marigold went straight for Yenfire and started a grappling match. The younger of the two, Tammy took out her dagger and made a wild swing at Kithri. Dodging left and right Kithri danced her way around the ring, blocking and returning hit for hit.  She was almost too focused on her opponent that she missed out on Yenfire’s gasp of pain. Joine had stabbed a dagger in Yenfire’s foot, which although brutal did not count as illegal in the fight. Yenfire slowly was getting pushed down, his face scrunched up in pain. Kithri used the momentum from one of  tammy's wild swings to tip her over until tammy was face first on the mat. While she was down kithri vaulted over to Yenfire, securing her dagger to a whip. swinging the makeshift weapon the threw it at Joine and watched in quiet satisfaction as it wrapped around her. With a sharp tug, Kithri was able to disorient Joine long enough for Yenfire to remove the dagger from his foot and poise it at her neck. With little fanfare and a lot of cursing from tammy, the Yenfire team had won.
    Yenfire stood at the docks some days later. Watching the waves crash along the ship, They had won, and after that win Kithri seemed to find in her the confidence she lacked. He laughed to himself quietly, hopefully she would keep that confidence and be able to lead a good life here. Stepping onto the ship he breathed in the crisp winter air and stretched as Kithri shoved past him, a satchel on her back. Ah yes, of course she would follow him, because that is exactly what normal people would do. Yenfire paused in his internal ramble, he really needs to figure out a way to spot trouble when he finds it.
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#62 12:51am May 29
Huzzah, I have achieved the next level of life for most people living in first world countries,  I have graduated.  Won’t lie, the experience of graduation is something I won’t keep closely to me at all. Things that have happened before and after will. Again, I’ll do what I can to recollect all the memories.  Before graduation I had to wake up various times to go for testing, all I feel that I did well in, not a good sign, but it’s in the past. On that testing week, Jessica and I went out for a wall starting from the school.  It was a long walk. Wonderful experience,  to be with a buddy and out of the influences of stress.  We walked around these collection of stores and off we went to Burger King.  Since it was still morning that Friday,I think 11am, they weren’t selling the vege burger she wanted so she got something else while I ordered  (she did, I was too shy) a burrito basically and a drink. We ate and spent the time well, she payed for it as I had no money,  how kind of her. Not only that we went to a nearby Goodwill and we were there for a good amount of time.  I can’t avoid to mention she bought me some stuff we were trying out like sweaters and suits. In the time we were there, I found old CD cases and video games for the Xbox and PS1, I miss old box art on them.  There were also vinyl discs including the soundtrack to Ben-Hur and Vincente Fernandez, I took pictures of them. Eventually we ended up getting items in which she, again, bought for.  She got a mini plate of a clown and some child, a blue painting with yellow eyes to it, a sweater that was bigger than her sweaters.  While I got some random sweater and suit, all of it was cheap.  We soon parted ways as I didn’t want my need to poop come instantly so I walked back home. My mom told me tell sweater is made out of wool and would costed around 90 dollars, I got it for free, nice. Skip some days, graduation practice occurred.  I hated those two days, ah. Then graduation occurred this past Friday night,  at the Germain Arena, small arena if I must judge. I sat with a very few people I knew, also I had this golden rope around me to signify my GPA,  but I didn’t care. My mom put on Bobby pins to hold down the hat, I look like I was balding. Worthy mention was that my dad was there and he recorded it, but he complained the video wouldn’t focus and I’m too terrified to look into it, he never had my camera to play around with.  I was glad, of course,  to have him there.  It was the plan to leave the next day,  but Rose is coming down here tomorrow as I write, well, today,  so I’m having a good feeling to me. Before I go too fast, we ate at an Italian restaurant that I enjoy, dad and I ate “underwear” my favorite Italian food. Oh, also, my mom and I went out before the day of graduation to look for a suit for me. I’ll probably post a picture of it, it’s a flawless suit. Mom tried to show me over suits to get, but it was calling to me and I required to get it in order to be glad in something I wear that’s fancy for once. My dad had to leave the past Saturday to go back up in order to work. He took my computer so when Rose comes to my house, she won’t be able to see my “ultimate power”. Eh, oh well. I’m almost at ease that I’ll be meeting up with her, just hoping her blinding by her boyfriend won’t get in the way of our enjoyment.  As the day got closer, she has been texting me more and just a few hours ago I could actually tell she was happy for once unlike the other times she texts me. Not saying she texts upset,  just no faces or such, you know? I’m seeing if I should say what I’ve been fighting to hold in. She’s so happy with the guy and if it doesn’t work, it doesn’t work.  I’ll need to clean up my act too, especially my habits that plague me, such regrets.  Good thing is that workout had worked out a bit, that’s a plus. On Sunday I managed to get to Bubba as it was his birthday, I gave him some money that was given to me by my mom. So my mom gave him money, basically.  We, as in Bubba, Russian guy and some dude along with me were in his room the whole time. I’ve known tell Russian guy for many years, just never tried to keep contact to the guy and Andrew, the other guy, seemed cool. We all got along very well and we laughed at each other’s jokes and so on.  There was some food, I barely ate the cheesecake and I mostly had some cheeseburgers and Dr . Pepsi.  Bubba and his family must drink soda everyday as he never fails to not have any. I was there at 12 and mom picked me up at 8:10pm. His mom, dad and relatives were there too. I brought my Xbox,  we were going to pay Resident Evil 7,  but his computer was a mess so we played Bioshock Infinite for a bit, mainly me that I bought as no one else wanted to play as he was trying to fix the computer.  It was something to do with Windows that was messing up. We eventually played spilt screen Minecraft and then to YouTube watching videos,  obviously.  It was wonderful,  I loved it. Now Rose will be coming around, we’ll see what happens.  Also, Mollyboo and I chatted awhile back to meet up in Toronto as I was talking to my dad about it, my favorite movie is set there.  I have no clue where exactly in the city, but oh well. Dad is up for the idea. So is Mollyboo. The bad news so far as been Alyssa hasn’t been doing well. Her health is diminishing as she left me a voice message on snap chat about it. She’s doing awful, they’ll have to move somewhere in about a year so I dearly hope I could possibly drive up there to her to get a chance to be with her. I honestly miss her, I do. Erin,  on the other hand, I don’t care, I won’t mention of her anymore.  I hope Alyssa texts back with something soon,  I’m afraid for her health and life in general.  There would be no problem if I had to take care of her, she’s a good person at heart, an innocent heart with some unique characteristics.  Oh, about that Jenna girl, she disappeared suddenly from my life.  She just stopped replying a bit after I offered for Skype. As for now,  I know who to care for and who I shouldn’t care much for.  Deep down I’ll always care regardless.  Over the summer,  I’ll be practicing a lot of guitar and maybe drawing or Russian. Time passing will only make the motivation get stronger, I wouldn’t mind getting better at guitar and singing was to kill me. I do believe what you love will kill you, hopefully others will understand what I mean. Probably best way to die,  or dying peacefully knowing all who you love will be safe for now.  I don’t want to think too far, it’s not the time.  Almost forgot,  dad shaved my beard so I look whiter and younger. Hah. Not like it’ll make a difference with people assuming my background. I think I’ll have to pass by to my school soon, I want to keep contact with a bit more teachers.  I haven’t done that with Estock yet. I was going to invite Mr.Sharp to the graduation,  but during the practice they told us, including the audience,  to not even cheer to hear the names properly as they say and honor the students rightfully.  People cheered anyway. Plus, we were off to eat right after that so yeah. I’ll see what I can do if I can go tomorrow,  maybe.  If they’ll let me, who knows?  As for now, I’ll do what I can. Stress has been low for now,  I’ve made some progress with what I want to do and that’s good. Unfortunately,  I’ll be off to college near here, plan is to leave Florida in about less than 3 years. I want to go. I need new surroundings and places.  A new identity.  My true identity.  But for now, I need true sweet dreaming. Good night.
1:42am
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