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#again this drama is a love letter to light and l's relationship
stardewlily · 5 months
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Chapter Twelve of My Everlasting Light
A Stardew Valley fan fiction about the relationship between Sebastian and my farmer, Lily.
Synopsis: Things come to a head when Lily's ex arrives in town and Sebastian is forced to take action
Cast: Original Female Character, Sebastian, Sam, Pam, Original Male Character (ex-boyfriend)
Contents: Established Relationship (Dating), Mental Health Issues, Drama, Trauma, Confrontation, Domestic Violence, Hurt/Comfort
Warnings: Domestic Abuse - contains one scene of a man using physical violence against a woman. While not overly graphic please do not interact if this would cause you any distress!
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Lily's Protector
Sebastian looked up at the clock. Only twenty minutes had passed since he last checked. He scowled and tried to force his attention back to the screen in front of him. Why did he feel so agitated? He had plenty of work to keep him occupied, he was seeing Lily tonight as usual, everything should be just fine. And yet…
Ever since he'd got up that morning something had seemed a little off. It had been nearly two weeks since Lily had received that letter from her ex and he had been relieved to see his love relax a little more as each day passed and her fear of him turning up on her doorstep never materialised. It seemed the letter had just been a mean spirited bluff, a last attempt to scare the woman that had finally escaped him. Even her crazy ex wasn't obsessed enough to travel half way across the country to hunt her down.
Of course that was the case. It had to be. So why this feeling? Sebastian had suffered with anxiety his entire life, he was well used to feelings of impending doom, but this was different. He felt afraid for Lily.
He pushed his keyboard back and reached for his phone. That was it. He was ringing her. He didn't care if it was just his craziness. He wasn't going to take any chances when it came to her.
The phone rang for longer than it normally did and he felt his heart start to beat faster. Where was she? She should have answered by now…
Then he heard the click as she picked up and the sweet sound of her voice. He let out his breath in a big whoosh, didn't even know he'd been holding it until then.
"Seb!" She sounded cheery, a little flustered, but otherwise fine. "I'm sorry I didn't answer right away, I was packing some boxes to take to Pierre's and couldn't find my phone, then I realised it was under all the strawberries and had to unpack them all over again!"
He smiled, that was so typical of his Lily. Also, it should have been the mayor's job to ship all that stuff, but she did it herself because she didn't want to be a bother. "You know you can let Lewis do all that, right?"
"I know," she said brightly, "but he already has so much to do and I was going into town anyway."
He laughed softly, what was he going to do with her? "I don't think he's as busy as you think, baby, but I know there's no stopping you when you set your mind to something."
"Well you're just the same, Sebby," she giggled and he felt his heart melt as usual at the sound of her laughter.
"Is that cheek I hear there?" he grinned. "Are you sassing me, sweetheart?"
"No more than usual," she insisted with another giggle. "But you can always set me straight tonight."
"Oh I will." He thoroughly intended to spend a large part of the night making love to her.
"I'll see you later, okay?" He could hear sounds of box juggling. "I told Pierre I'd be there at noon and if I'm late you know he'll probably use it as an excuse for a discount." She laughed again. "He's such a shark that man! I love you, Sebby."
His heart melted just a little bit more. "I love you too, baby."
The phone went dead and he looked at it for a long moment. He should feel better now. And he did a bit. He always felt better after any contact with Lily. But still… something felt wrong.
He pulled his keyboard back out, quickly saved his work, then stood up and grabbed his bike keys.
'On my way to help, baby." He jabbed out a quick text. "Don't leave without me!"
Just to put his mind at ease, he'd take a quick ride down to the farm, help her deliver all those boxes, make sure she didn't get ripped off, then, well, maybe they'd just spend the whole day together… just to put his mind at ease.
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"Do you know a girl called Lily?"
Pam looked at the man who was just getting off the bus. He was her only passenger that morning and had been quiet and self-contained for the whole journey. Seemed pleasant enough, if a little unremarkable looking - tall, lanky, pale eyes, slightly receding hairline, a ready smile.
"She moved here a while ago, maybe four or five months. Slim, auburn hair, hazel eyes. Kind of shy."
"Yeah, I know her." Lily was actually one of the few people in town Pam approved of. Sweet kid, quiet, conscientious, always called out a greeting when she passed by the bus stop. "She owns the farm just down the road that way." She nodded her head.
"Oh," the man looked excited, started to climb out of the bus.
"Are you a friend of hers?"
"Oh yes," he said, smiling again. "Lily and I go back a long way."
"Well, you'd best be quick or you'll miss her. She always sells her wares in town at noon on Tuesdays. Damn reliable, that girl. Of course, you could aways drop by Pierre's and catch her there later."
"No, no," he spoke quickly. "I prefer to visit her at home." His smile grew wider. "Thanks, you've been a big help."
He stepped off the bus and took the road towards the farm.
'What a nice guy,' Pam thought to herself as she pulled out her lunchbox and settled down for a well earned break.
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Lily smiled as she read Seb's text. That was so sweet of him, and so typical, he was always ready to offer his help to anyone who needed it, despite what others thought about his seemingly aloof nature.
She turned back to her work, she only had a few more things to pack now. This week had seen quite a few new crops ripen and she was excited to see what Pierre would make of her efforts. She was determined to impress that cranky shopkeeper if it was the last thing she did.
She heard a knock at the door. Seb got here fast, she thought to herself, but then knowing the reception around here he probably sent that text ages ago.
"It's open," she called, wondering why he didn't let himself in as always.
Something in her brain clicked over at that thought. Seb did always let himself in.
No… oh no… it couldn't be…
Her mind screamed at her. Why didn't you keep the door locked? But you were just going out in a minute and…
The door opened, seeming to take ages to swing back. Her hand was on her phone already, searching for speed dial.
She knew who it was going to be.
"Now then, Lily," he knocked the phone out of her hand. "We don't want anyone spoiling our reunion, do we?"
It span into the corner of the room. She gazed after it with despairing eyes. Had the call gone through?
He closed the door behind him. "It's been a long time, honey."
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Sebastian heard his phone go off in his pocket and reached for it as he wheeled his bike out of the garage. Luckily his mom had a job today and the truck was gone so it was much easier to get out.
It was Lily's number. Odd. They'd only just talked. The unease he'd felt all day flared within him. He quickly answered. "Lily?"
Nothing.
Odder still.
Hang on. Could he hear a male voice?
His heart stopped cold in his chest.
It was him.
He knew it.
He fucking knew it.
He hung up, stabbed out a number, bike already roaring into life. It was picked up almost straight away, thank Yoba.
"He's here. Make the call."
He'd prepared for this.
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"Barry…" she backed away from him, so afraid she could barely think. Her heart hammered in her chest. This man, this horrible, terrifying man. Would she never be free of him?
"Ah, Lily," he smiled at her. It made her feel sick. "I've missed you so much. You know we were perfect for each other. Why on earth did you move so far away from me?"
"You know why," she said, knowing he couldn't be reasoned with, but trying anyway. "I told you so many times, it wasn't working, it…"
"Only because you didn't work on it with me." He grabbed her arm, pulled her to him. She sobbed, tried to pull away, helpless as always. He was so much taller, so much stronger, than she could ever be.
"Let me go," she cried, struggling in his grasp. "Please… get off me!"
He snarled at that and she immediately regretted her choice of words, gasping as he caught her by the chin, his fingers digging deep, pain flaring through her as he slammed her up against the wall.
"Always saying that," he sneered, his face mere inches from hers. "Always 'get off me, Barry' 'I don't want to, Barry.' I got so fucking tired of hearing that!"
She let out a choked whimper, both hands scrabbling at his, trying to loosen his grip. He lifted her up, her heels scraping the skirting, shook her so hard her head rattled against the plaster.
"You're coming back with me right now, Lily. No more of this running away shit!"
The door flew open behind them. Lily let out a sob of relief. It was Seb. Her call had gone through.
Barry saw her eyes move and turned to see what she was looking at.
"Who the fuck is this?" he growled. "Did you get yourself another man, you little bitch?"
Sebastian's face was white. His entire body shook. His eyes burned. Lily had never seen him so angry.
"Take your hands off her."
"You going to make me, pretty boy?" he tried to bluster but Lily could feel his grip on her loosen a little.
Sebastian walked slowly towards them, hands forming into fists at his sides, gaze unwavering. "I said… take your hands off her."
Barry started to tremble, seeming surprised at himself as his hands fell away from her. He looked down at them then back up in disbelief. Lily took her chance and, crying out, dashed to her rescuer's side.
"Seb!"
Seb put his arm around her and pulled her close, never once removing his gaze from Barry, who was now backing away, Seb continuing to advance on him so relentlessly that he let out a terrified cry, stumbled over the chair behind him and fell to the ground, scuffling backwards until he hit the same wall he had held Lily against such a short while ago.
"Please man... come on..." he whined. "I didn't mean any harm." He held up a placating hand.
Sebastian didn't stop moving, Lily felt his entire body stiffen at Barry's words.
"Didn't... mean... any... harm?" he spaced each word out as he finally came to a halt and glared down at the man grovelling beneath him. Lily watched in amazement as Barry's face blanched, his hand dropping limply, eyes wide and mouth slack before Sebastian's rage.
"This hand." Seb carefully placed one foot over Barry's right hand where it lay on the floor. He looked down at it helplessly, seeming completely incapable of moving. "This fucking hand has caused my Lily so much pain."
Lily sobbed desperately as Seb's foot ground down on her ex's hand, she could hear his bones cracking, his agonised screams, just a small part of the pain he had handed out to her given back to him, justice finally meted out to the man who had tormented her for so long.
"You lay one finger on her ever again," Seb's eyes lanced into him as he wailed and clutched at his ruined hand, "and next time I won't just break your hand I will fucking kill you."
"You need any help there, dude?"
Lily looked wildly around. Sam had appeared in the doorway. Big, tall, dependable Sam. She sobbed again, felt Seb's arm tighten even more around her.
Barry struggled to his feet, tears of pain streaking his face. "Wait," he choked out. "Please... I'm not looking for any trouble."
"But you are looking for trouble," Seb said coldly. "Only it's not so much fun when it's not just you and one helpless woman, is it?"
"Cops are on the way, man," Sam said cheerily. "You want me to sit on him for a while till they arrive?"
"Th.. that won't be necessary," Barry gibbered, terror seeming to have momentarily overcome his pain. "Shit, I mean, there's no need for the cops. Fuck, I'm leaving man, I'm leaving, just back off, back off! Like I said, I'm not looking for any trouble!" He tucked his broken hand beneath his arm, edged his way around the two young men, shaking visibly with every step.
"I'm leaving, okay? I won't be back."
"Damn right you won't," Sam slapped him on the shoulder on his way out. So hard Lily could see him wince. "But we'll make sure to have a nice reception waiting for you if you ever do."
The tension in the room snapped like a thread the moment the door slammed shut and in an instant Lily dropped to her knees and wailed into the silence. And he was there, her Seb, her protector, right next to her, holding her tight, rocking her, soothing her, stroking her hair, kissing her.
"It's okay, baby, it's okay. No one's gonna hurt you ever again. You're safe now, you're safe."
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It was later that night and Lily had fallen asleep in his arms on the couch. Harvey had given her instructions to rest and the cops had eventually arrived, made their report, done the usual not much of anything really and then been on their way. Sam had stayed for a while longer, making sure the two of them were okay and promising to be on hand again if Barry was ever stupid enough to come back. Sebastian was relieved to have such a good friend, he'd hoped when he'd set this plan up weeks ago that he wouldn't need to call on him but he'd known that if he did, Sam wouldn't fail him.
He looked down at the sleeping woman in his arms. She'd done a lot of crying again today and he'd held her through all of it. He stroked her hair and then slowly, carefully, slipped his arms beneath her and climbed to his feet. Although the couch was comfy enough, he knew they'd be better off in bed for the night. She murmured softly in his arms and then, when he laid her down on the sheets, her eyes flickered open, lit on him and a weary little smile crossed her face.
"Seb," she sighed his name and reached up, wrapping both arms around his neck and pulling him down into a soft kiss. "Thank you," she whispered. "I knew you'd come."
He gazed down at her, touched her cheek gently. "I told you I'd never let anyone hurt you ever again and I meant it."
"I know." Her eyes searched his, fear still marring their beautiful depths. "Please hold me, Seb, keep me safe."
"Of course I will, baby." He lay down beside her, pulling her against him.
"I love you, Sebby," she said in the sleepiest, sweetest little voice imaginable, snuggling into his side like a frightened kitten. He looked down at her, hair tousled across her shoulders, lashes resting perfectly on the curve of her cheek, lips soft and pink. She was so beautiful, so fragile, so vulnerable. And she was his. His to care for forever. His heart swelled so much he couldn't stand it.
"Oh Lily, my Lily. I love you too." He wrapped his arms around her, hugging her as tightly as he possibly could. There was nothing in this world more precious to him than this woman who lay in his arms right now. "I'll keep you safe, baby. I promise."
And he would. He would spend the rest of his life protecting her. Because she was everything to him.
Read Chapter Thirteen
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Cute little page dividers by @chachachannah / Boring old plain green ones by me!
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queersturbate · 3 years
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the tenderness of the drama is something i will never get over
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startanewdream · 3 years
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The road home
Summary: Lily watches Harry and Ginny finding their way back to each other following the end of the war.
Note: For @madhulika18, who asked for more Hinny moments as seen by James and Lily. I could never decide if this is really part of Eyes Glistening (because Harry and Ginny have drama really, and I don't like them having drama), but it works either way, so I hope you enjoy these moments (also, I have a soft spot for Lily and Harry talking, so...)
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It’s all about the words that aren’t being said.
Once, a long time ago, Lily lived that with James. But it was different and, though, of course, it didn’t seem like that at the time, it was easier too. Her problems were unknowing her feelings, not understanding why she enjoyed his company and why she craved his smile, his light. She had fancied him for a long time before she understood what it was what she really felt for him — and until then it was only her heart beating faster when they would touch each other without meaning too (a brush of hands, sitting together closer than necessary), enjoying the perfume he’d left on his trace, finding excuses to be with him.
But after she had understood what she felt for him, somehow it had been easy. Awkward, sure, that first date when she was feeling stupid near him — until she remembered this was James, and being with him was good and blissful and then kissing him had felt as natural as breathing —, but there was never a question about how they felt about each other, never doubts that they would be together.
They had fought over many things, until they perfected the art of compromising, of understanding each other’s view, but there was never a breakup, never something that really kept them apart.
They are lucky on this, she knows.
Especially when she sees the look on Harry’s face, the way his eyes can’t help but follow Ginny as she walks around between the tables of the Great Hall, stopping to share words with her friends.
They haven’t talked yet. Lily knows this because Harry was gone with Ron and Hermione after the battle and then he slept for a full day. When he woke up, he called his parents and they talked then — the most difficult conversation Lily had ever had in her life and the one she knew she needed most. She and James. They needed to understand what had happened, why it had cost Harry’s life and what it had meant, but nothing had really prepared her to know her son had died.
Only the thought of it sends shivers through her body.
Harry is fine now, having come down to the Great Hall to lunch; there are fewer people at Hogwarts two days after the Battle, so they manage to find a place for them to sit quietly. It’s almost peaceful.
Except Harry is clearly not at peace.
‘Go talk to her,’ she whispers to him, and Harry turns to her with those eyes that are full of ghosts lately — he has seen and lived and died too much.
‘She doesn’t want me,’ he answers, breathing heavily as if the words are physically hurting him.
‘How do you know?’ James asks, exchanging a confused look with Lily.
‘Because she hasn’t come to talk to me.’
Lily thinks Harry didn’t go to her either, so maybe this is just a case of miscommunication. But she doesn’t say anything, because she believes things have to happen at the right time. And she has been watching Ginny too; every time Harry looks the other way, she glances in his direction, an expression on her face that Lily cannot understand exactly.
It seems to be ablaze.
_______
Later, Lily will define it as a dance where the dancers aren’t supposed to touch each other but still they synchronize their steps perfectly.
It’s unnerving, really, and she doesn’t know how they are really managing it, but if there is a quality she could attribute to both Harry and Ginny is stubbornness.
They can’t ignore each other, not really, not with how much they encounter each other — funerals and homages and dinners over the Burrow and rebuilding Hogwarts —, so instead they adopt a sort of relationship that’s just a shadow of how much they got along together.
Lily saw them before they even dated or had acknowledged their feelings for each other, and Harry and Ginny had shined together with chemistry as if they were two ingredients in a potion that demanded to be together. It was only friendship but there was sparkle and understanding and compassion and brightness. Lily remembers thinking that even if they didn’t develop romantic feelings for each other, they were truly soulmates.
And this is just one of the reasons why their current formal courtesy with each other bothers her so much. If they wanted to be only friends, there wasn’t much she could do. But they are not even friends lately, just two people who had gone through so much and hadn’t been able to share anything with each other despite wanting very much.
That’s the other thing that annoys her. They want more. Both of them.
She knows Harry, of course — he shares the same expressions and he wears his feelings on the same sleeve Lily does, so it’s easy —, and Lily likes to think she knows Ginny too, for the times they met, for all they’ve talked and for the fact that Ginny is usually blatant on her feelings when they are at the edge.
Usually. This time, it seems their stubbornness is getting the better of both of them.
They are alone most of the days of May. Hermione has gone to Australia to find her parents and Ron went with her, and Lily thinks this would be perfect for them to get together again – to have time to talk and to truly live their relationship without the threat of a storm above their heads.
But they don’t go to each other. They stay apart, even though Lily sees the cracks in their stubbornness when Harry breaks a glass after hearing Ginny talking about exchanging letters with an ex-boyfriend, and when Ginny suddenly leaves the room after Harry mentions Kingsley’s proposal to start the Aurors course.
James sees it too. He is always frowning when they are in the same room, and Lily knows no one rooted more for that relationship than James. So she is not surprised that he approaches her one morning when they are cleaning the mess the Death Eaters made in her office.
‘Do you remember when you forbade me from intervening in Harry’s love life?’ he asks in a nonchalant voice, cleaning a stain that looks a lot like blood on the carpet.
Lily nods with her head.
‘Maybe it’s time to change that rule?’ James asks then, now sounding hopeful.
Lily throws him the briefest of the looks, without turning away her attention from the cauldrons she is supposed to check if anything is worth saving.
‘Harry would hate it if we did anything.’
‘Harry would hate it if he knew we were doing anything.’
‘And James Potter can be discreet? How many detentions did you get just because you couldn’t help but flaunt your work?’
He raises his eyebrows challengingly.
‘That Slug Club dinner on my birthday. I was so discreet no one ever found out what we were doing.’
Lily blushes. He was absurdly quiet that night, indeed, despite her attempts otherwise.
‘Fine, you’ve got a point. Go on, but I’m warning you, if Ginny realizes what you are trying to do, she will hex you and I won’t stop.’
‘As long as she hexes me on their wedding day, I won’t complain,’ James says unabashedly, and Lily has to grin.
She is not feeling much confident — James’ love plans took him three years to her agree to date him, after all, and even then she had fallen in love with him when he had given up on any plan at all —, but she can’t deny James is creative and it’s better trying anything than watching Harry sigh all over the place, heartbroken and unhappy.
During the year they were out, their house has been searched over and over; their furniture is broken and there are spots of red ink — or blood — in every room, with curses or slurs written on every wall. They could just easily destroy the house and build a new one, but it feels good to clean the place; it feels like a new beginning.
Maybe this is what James is hoping to give Harry and Ginny because he asks for her help in rebuilding their house. Ginny accepts surprisingly quickly, probably guessing that Harry will still be occupied with the work at Hogwarts.
‘Thanks for the help,’ Lily says after she and Ginny manage to clean the debris away from the stairs, so now the first floor is available for them to start cleaning up the rooms.
‘No problem, it’s good to be out of the house,’ Ginny notes, drying the sweat on her face. ‘Sometimes it feels… too claustrophobic there.’
Lily raises her eyebrows, indicating around the hall, where the number of things still to be organized makes the corridor seem a lot smaller than it is. Ginny gives a small chuckle.
‘It’s just — Mom is trying to compensate, I think. Ron is not here and I am the youngest and she needs to take care of something, after — after everything that happened. So, yeah, I need some time to myself.’
‘Are you sure there is nothing else you would like to do?’ Lily asks, concerned now. Ginny just shrugs.
‘Since I can’t fly, this seems like the best available option,’ she says. ‘And it feels good to be doing something — and there is so much to do here. The Death Eaters made a mess.’
‘That could be said for everywhere.’
‘And everyone,’ Ginny adds softly, and she returns to the cabinet she is trying to fix without saying anything further, but Lily doesn’t think she needs to. She saw Neville’s bruises, she saw Luna’s scars and she has a pretty good idea of how it was at Hogwarts under Voldemort’s regime.
But Ginny keeps her marks quietly, and Lily knows there is only one person she will be able to talk to.
The next day, James comes home earlier from Hogwarts with Harry. There is an awkward moment when Harry and Ginny meet in the kitchen and James mentions that now the main work over Hogwarts is done, Harry volunteered to help get his home back again.
‘Any problem?’ James asks genially, making both Harry and Ginny jump.
‘No,’ they say at the same time, and it doesn’t convince anyone.
Lily never noticed how big their house was until she realizes Harry and Ginny still manage to avoid each other except during mealtimes, so she decides they can get past subtlety. She and James start to ask them for help for the same rooms until they eventually are paired in the same tasks.
She doesn’t hear them talking, but it seems to work, albeit at the slowest pace ever.
‘You won’t believe who asked Sirius for an interview,’ James says one night after they settled for the day and they are having dinner before Ginny returns to her house. ‘Rita Skeeter.’
‘What scoop does she want now?’ Harry asks, rolling his eyes. ‘I am still awaiting her biography about me.’
‘What will be called?’, Ginny asks, and Harry turns to her with his eyes already shining with the joke.
‘Easy. Harry Potter, chosen or undesirable one?’
She laughs – it’s a short tentative laugh, but it’s there, and Harry smiles too. James exchanges a look with Lily, but she shakes her head warningly to him.
‘What Skeeter wanted with Sirius?’ she asks, putting the conversation back into place. It was just a shared joke. There is still a long road ahead.
‘Oh, gossip on you and me, actually, which unfortunately is something Sirius thinks it’s too funny to pass – and also he has a soft spot for Skeeter.’
Harry chokes on his drink.
‘Soft spot?’
‘Oh, please, don’t tell me –‘ Ginny raises her eyebrows, exchanging a bewildered look with Harry. ‘Sirius and Rita Skeeter?’
James chuckles.
‘No, he just likes her because of the animagus stuff. He says he can’t fault her for being one.’
‘Oh, much better,’ Ginny sighs. Then she bits her lip before looking back at Harry. ‘Can you imagine them together? Rita Skeeter as your godmother?’
‘I would have to quit Sirius from his job as godfather,’ Harry says, pretending to gag. ‘He would clearly be underqualified.’
There is another small giggle and that’s it for the night.
They are talking again at least, even if it is still not like it used to be. There are no whispered words during their time together during the day and they don’t seem to be secretly snogging. But they talk sometimes, and once or twice Lily hears a laugh when she passes the room they are in.
But it’s only two weeks later that something seems to happen.
Lily is in her room, finishing to set up the bed so she and James will finally be able to sleep there, when the voices catch her up on her window.
‘You are bleeding.’
‘It’s just a cut, Harry, no big deal.’
‘It was a splinter, there can still be something there.’
‘I told you, I took everything off. I will just press it, it will stop bleeding in a minute.’
‘I can help you, I – I know a lot of healing spells.’
There is a pause.
‘Me too, but I also know that the bleeding will stop. It’s not deep.’
‘How do you –‘
‘Same way you know, Harry.’ There is a note of tension in Ginny’s voice. ‘I had to learn.’
‘Ginny –‘
‘What? Do you think you were the only one who had a hard time?’
And she storms inside, giving him no time to answer.
Harry is subdued that night, even more reserved than natural, and when she passes his room late at night, she sees the light is on. For a second Lily wonders if she should call James, but then she sighs and knocks on his door.
‘Harry?’
In answer, the door opens quietly. Lily enters his room to see Harry fully clothed on his bed; he is holding something and, with a start, she realizes it’s the Marauder’s Map. That’s a weird thing for Harry to be consulting in the middle of the night.
‘Can’t sleep?’ she asks, sitting on the edge of his bed and running her hand through his hair comfortingly. He shrugs. ‘Anything to do with that fight with Ginny?’
He raises his eyebrows.
‘Hearing behind doors, Mum?’
‘No need, you were talking under my window.’
‘Next fight I will make sure we are far,’ he says with a grimace.
‘There will be a next fight?’
‘I don’t know,’ he admits, and this prospect doesn’t seem to make him better. ‘If I asked you something, would you be honest with me?’
‘Wasn’t I always, Harry?’
He smiles for a second before his expression is grave and uncertain.
‘Do you think I am self-centred?’
Lily blinks.
‘No one would accuse you of being selfish, Harry, I mean –’
She doesn’t know where to begin, considering all the sacrifices she had seen Harry make over the years — he gave his life —, but Harry shakes his head.
‘Not selfish, I mean – the summer after my fourth year, when Voldemort was back, I said plenty of things –’
‘You were under a lot of stress, no one –’
‘I know, but I was complaining about how everything happened to me and now I am thinking that maybe, somehow, I never stopped to think that things happen to other people too.’
Lily squeezes his hand.
‘It is not a suffering competition, Harry.’
‘I don’t know if I see it that way. I mean, when I saw Neville for the first time, with all his bruises and looking so hurt, I still wished it could be me, staying at Hogwarts and fighting because it seemed easier and it never occurred to me that she could – they could – have had a difficult time too. It still seemed… just school.’
He pauses to pick up the Marauder’s Map, opening it even if there is no map showing there.
‘I used to take the Map last year to watch over her,’ he whispers, his face flushing. ‘And I saw her dot and I never thought that she could be in trouble. I knew they were rebelling, but… it didn’t feel like it was something real.’
‘Well, that’s why you should talk to each other. None of you will understand if you keep avoiding each other.’
‘She is mad at me.’
‘Of course she is. You are avoiding her.’
He doesn’t answer.
‘You need to talk, Harry. Go there. Try it.’
He blinks, a hint of a smile on his lips.
‘Are you suggesting that I go visit my ex-girlfriend in the middle of the night?’
‘I’m pretty sure you will just talk if she doesn’t hex you first,’ Lily says brightly. Then she smiles softly. ‘You could wait until tomorrow, Harry, but I have the feeling you both have been waiting too long. And this isn’t any of your styles. You are both people of action.’
Harry grins now, standing up.
‘I will go then. Thanks for the tip, Mum.’
Lily accepts the soft kiss he gives her on the cheek.
‘Just be safe, Harry.’
_______
Harry seems to be in a better mood the next morning, despite the fact that he slept a few hours that night — Lily knows he returned by five, just as the sun was rising.
But she doesn’t say anything, just smiling to herself when Harry’s face lights up when the fireplace erupts into emerald flames and Ginny appears, dusting her clothes. They exchange a look that it’s still not there yet, but it’s soft and promising. James looks in her direction, surprised, and she promises to explain later.
It’s not Summer yet, but the days of May and then June get warmer and then Harry and Ginny are spending more time outside, though there isn’t much to fix there.
At least, not material things.
James keeps an eye on them — he wouldn’t resist not doing so —, telling her that most of the time they just seem to be taking long strolls and talking.
One day they return from their walk holding hands, and Lily has to lock James inside the room so he doesn’t say anything. Harry and Ginny are still not there.
The road home takes time.
On the second weekend of June they have the hottest day yet and they take some time off; James transfigures a pool in the backyard that neither Harry nor Ginny seems to enjoy other than to sit at the edge of the pool and take off their shoes to wet their feet. Instead of helping to ease any tension, the pool seems to create some weight over them, making them more silent than usual, so James suggests they go flying instead.
‘My Firebolt is gone,’ Harry remembers, wincing, and Lily knows it’s not the broomstick he is really missing right now. Harry lost a friend that day.
‘Mine was burnt by the Carrows last year,’ Ginny adds, her voice casual as if it’s nothing important.
They don’t end up doing anything after that.
In the afternoon, James gets a call from Sirius and Lily decides to just stay home, finishing the Wolfsbane Potions she will need to deliver to Remus by the end of the week. She is quietly lost in her favourite potion world when she hears the voices, and it’s just because they are whispering, rather than talking normally, that it draws her attention.
‘Are you sure?’ Ginny is asking, her voice unusually hesitant.
‘Only if you are,’ he whispers, sounding just as unstable.
Lily approaches the window and withdraws the curtains as little as she needs. Harry and Ginny are still by the pool, standing facing each other, and without looking away from Harry, she takes off her shirt, to reveal her bikini under it.
Harry gasps, but Lily knows that what is taking his breath away are the marks on Ginny’s torso — faint scars of cuts and small yellowed bruises that remained from the battle, over a month ago.
Ginny bits her lip, her arms trembling as if she wants to cover herself. Harry finally takes a step in her direction, looking her in the eyes now.
'Thank you for showing me,’ he whispers and then he sighs. 'My turn'.
His hands are shaking as he goes to unbutton his shirt, until Ginny raises her hands.
'May I?'
Harry nods slowly.
Ginny keeps her head high, not looking away from Harry's eyes, until she finishes opening all the buttons from his shirt and taking it off.
Then her eyes fall to his chest and Ginny freezes.
Lily knows what she is seeing, even though Lily can't see it from her angle: Harry's new lightning scar, across his chest, over his heart, where the Killing Curse hit him for the second time in his life.
'Harry,’ Ginny sighs, pain evident in her voice. She raises her hand, looking at him, questioning him silently. Harry nods once more.
Then Ginny takes a step closer to him, touching his chest, and Lily knows that she must be feeling his heart over it.
She lets the curtain fall and returns to her potion.
She is not surprised when they return home holding hands and she only tells James later (so he doesn't say anything during dinner because she knows her husband) that Ginny kissed Harry softly on the lips when she thought no one was seeing them.
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fandom-imagines · 3 years
Text
Illogical
Fandom: Death Note
Pairing: L Lawliet X Yagami!Reader
Words: 1.5k 
Warnings: Violence and death (but it’s death note :P)
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Being Light Yagami’s sister was hard for both younger girls.
Y/N and Sayu were immensely proud of the older man, all whilst being envious. However, Y/N was less envious due to her own intelligence rivalling that of the older Yagami. That was one of the reasons that he chose her. In fact, that was the reason he had her help him create a new world, one of which they would both rule together.
Understandably the younger sibling was afraid.
She had noticed the genius changing during a short amount of time, but she had simply dismissed it, blaming it on teenage hormones. But it never got better, it got worse. Before he would spend time with the family, taking time out of his busy schedule to bond with them, but now he was constantly in his room ‘studying’.
“Light?” Y/N’s voice sounded from behind the door which was shortly followed by a knock. “Can I come in?”
A chuckle left Ryuk’s lips at Lights panicked expression that was simply caused by the voice of the younger girl behind the door.
Light had been so busy for the last few weeks that he had completely forgotten about their agreement to spend some time together whilst the rest of the family were away.
“Yeah, come in,” he called back, wincing at the sound of the door creaking open to reveal the Y/H/C-haired girl.
“What’s up?” A grin was plastered on her lips as she flopped onto his bed, narrowly missing touching the death note that he had carelessly left there whilst he took a short break from killing criminals.
“Be careful, Light.” The shinigami’s voice caught Light’s attention, eyes glancing to the tall figure, “Anyone who touches that notebook can see me, as well as hear me.” Another laugh left his lips.
As though it was planned, Y/N’s fingers reached for the book, “Hey, what’s this?”
Her eyes widened as she glanced up at the tall death God who simply gave her a small wave along with a ‘hi’.
“H-hello…?” Y/N’s shaky voice left her lips, something that Ryuk shook his head at. “Light? Wha…”
Unbeknownst to her, Light was already situated on the floor in front of her. He gently grasped her cheek, tilting her wide eyes to look into his own.
“Y/N, I am Kira. Will you help me create a new world?”
It had felt like forever since that day. Names no longer meant a thing to her, just a string of letters to write down to end somebody’s life.
Things got even more tricky when her and Light had been asked to join the investigation by L himself, someone that Y/N began to unwillingly develop a small crush on. Considering that he was searching to kill her and Light, she guessed that this crush was probably a bad thing.
Some may think that things could not get worse from there, but oh boy, they can.
“Y/N,” L’s deep voice brought the girl from her thoughts, bringing her back to reality.
He was seated beside her, cake placed on the desk in front of him, yet his attention was focused solely on her.
“Are you okay?” Those three words that left his lips shocked her, unable to make eye contact with him she decided to instead glance down at his lips, nerves taking over her.
Lawliet caught onto her anxiety immediately, placing his cold hand on top of the warmth of her own to calm her, something that he often did.
Not only did it get her to relax, but he also enjoyed touching her, not that he would ever admit that to anybody of course. Especially not when you remember that she was the sister of his main suspect for the Kira case. However, he had never suspected her of a thing. Too blinded by love? Perhaps.
“Ryu?” Confusion filled her Y/E/C orbs as she leant up to face him, only to see his own gaze on her lips.
She wasn’t stupid; she knew what that meant.
She heard a chuckle behind her, one she immediately recognised at Ryuk’s. Said chuckle only became louder as he witnessed the detective and the death note holders’ lips touch.
The entirety of the task force, including L, stood around Light, Y/N slightly situated to the side of him whilst he laughed.
“That’s right,” a smirk covered his lips, “I’m Kira. But I’m not the only one.” Light’s eyes darted towards his younger sister who stood as still as a statue, fear filling her body as she realised that her boyfriend would want to kill her, and she would have to kill her boyfriend.
“Y/N…” Lawliet’s voice held a hint of betrayal in it as he spoke, watching as she stepped towards Light who handed her a death note before pushing her to the side again.
“Do the honours,” Light grinned, glancing towards L, prepared to watch him fall to the ground from a heart attack.
Light believed that the relationship between the detective and his sister was fake, something she was using to their advantage to win the war. Little did he know that she loved him, she loved him more than she loved her own psychopathic brother.
An idea flashed into Y/N’s head as she nodded, feeling Ryuk stood behind her who was enjoying the drama unfolding before him.
She brought the pen to the page, ignoring everyone’s pleas for her to stop as she wrote. The look of betrayal and hurt on the raven-haired man struck pain into her heart, but she knew what she was doing was right.
“Goodbye, L. Kira will always win.” Light’s manic laugh sounded again as he spoke, ignoring Ryuk’s own laugh which everyone could hear also.
Light’s laugh came to a halt as he began coughing.
“Y-Y/N…?” A look of betrayal filled his face before being covered in anger as he glared at her. “Ryuk! Kill her.” He coughed again, becoming desperate as he realised what she had done.
She had written his name, not L’s.
“Sorry, Light.” Ryuk chuckled, “I always said I wasn’t on yours or L’s side, but Y/N truly wins this one.” Another chuckle left his lips as he patted Y/N’s hair in a comforting manner, tears falling down her cheeks as she watched the life leave Kira’s eyes.
Both the book and pen fell from her shaking hands, body dropping to the ground as she burst into uncontrollable sobs.
“I-I’m sorry, I didn’t want to.”
Nobody moved an inch, scared that this was all an act.
“Please, don’t hate me.” Hands reaching up to her hair, Y/N began to pull tightly to relieve, at least some of, her anxiety.
Matsuda had walked towards Light, checking his body for a pulse.
There was none.
“Y/N,” Lawliet was the first of the task force to speak, “breathe.”
Another sob left her lips as she desperately clawed at her hair.
L climbed up onto his feet, making his way towards her. “It’s okay,” he whispered, kneeling in front of her, “Light can’t hurt you anymore.”
“I killed him, Ryu. I killed my own brother.” Tears cascaded down her cheeks, body wracked with sobs that only increased as Ryuzaki pulled her into a tight hug.
“You did what you had to.”
The rest of the task force stood still in horror at what had just happened.
The girl they had never suspected was responsible for the killings. Not only her, her genius brother also. From what they could piece together, it was unwilling on her part, anybody could deduce that much. It was evident from the genuine remorse she showed that she regretted everything.
“I’m sorry,” Y/N’s hands left her hair to wrap around the detective, afraid that when she opens her eyes he’d be gone; afraid that he would hate her. “I didn’t want to hurt you; I didn’t want to hurt anyone.”
L shushed her, pale hands moving to massage her hair in a soothing manner, “it’s okay.”
The two remained like that for what felt like hours, both as afraid as the other to pull away in case this was all a dream, in case they would lose each other.
“I love you,”
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ilikefandom · 3 years
Text
Guilt and Unwanted Attention
Request: Hi love<3 do you think you could do a part 2 to the snape x reader fic where he goes to jail. Maybe the reader has moved on and Severus realized he messed up and wants her back? If not I understand
Requested by: Anon
Genre: Angst, with a hopeful ending
Synopsis: (Y/n) meets the cute barista of a Cokeworth cafe, Severus assumes they're in love.
Pairings: Severus Snape x Fem reader
Warnings: Angst, mention of alcohol consumption
It had been a few months since the trial had ended, and the same amount of time since Severus Snape had spoken to (Y/n). He still felt guilty about how he had treated her and he needed to speak to her again.
He went to her house. He stood outside her window at night. He ran his fingers over all of the letters she had sent him that he didn’t bother to answer. Severus Snape was a mess. A ball of rubbish hormones and feelings, no better than his teenage students.
He needed her. As a friend. As a best friend. Maybe even, as a partner, although he could never consciously admit that.
(Y/n) had the same need as Severus, however, the light that had filled their friendship had slunk away, replaced by the shadow of its disappearance. Her sadness filled her days and the letters that she sent to him dwindled into nothing.
If all the trying was for nothing, then maybe Severus did mean what he said to her, and that he didn’t want to be with her anymore, as a friend or anything else.
She made her way to the local cafe in Cokeworth, deciding to take in more muggle culture for her return to Hogwarts in the Fall to teach muggle studies. And to think she took a year off, just to follow Severus’ trial. Sliding into her booth with her new muggle technology, a cell phone, (Y/n) searched for something, anything to keep her mind off of Severus.
She had only been there a few times and the barista was always nice. He would make her tea just right and gave her the perfect ratio of cream and sugar. His name was Jaymi and he was wonderful.
Over the time she had known him, Jaymi kept to himself, but he always understood her and her feelings. He had, in time, confessed that he didn’t usually work at the counter. He was one of the owners of the cafe and both he and his sister, Alex, enjoyed it immensely. 
He began to slowly sneak his way into her heart, being a muggle, she couldn’t disclose her true job, but he found out she was a teacher at a boarding school. Jaymi always made her smile, and that job position had been vacant for a while.
Severus, on the other hand, prefered to make his espresso himself so he only ventured down to the cafe for the black potion that kept him awake. Putting on some muggle clothes and tying his hair up, he made his way down to the main street.
He heard laughter from the cafe as he stepped inside. Frozen in the moment, he gazed at (Y/n) who was sitting at a table with a computer, laughing at something a young man had said, a muggle man. 
“Jaymi! How are you so hilarious?” (Y/n) chortled as she continued to type a lesson plan for October.
“I say it’s pure genetics. Or maybe a spark for people I like.” His eyes sparkled as he smiled down at (Y/n).
“Enough with the electricity puns Jay!” She continued to giggle to herself.
Jaymi, noticing that Snape was in the door looked over at him and smiled. “What can I get you today?”
(Y/n) resisted the urge to turn around when she heard Severus’ melodious voice say, “An espresso.” She became rigid, her crush from both work and childhood, was standing right behind her, months after their blow up.
“Hello, Severus.” (Y/n) said as she continued to work on her slide show.
Severus grunted in return, more annoyed with Jaymi than anyone else. (Y/n) looked nice today, and he craved that niceness to be directed to him and not at some nobody from this tiny town.
Jaymi handed him the shot and strode back over to (Y/n). “So how about that date, (Y/n)? I’m sure we can find something new wave and current, to do.”
(Y/n) put her face in her hands. “Jaymi, that was a bad one!”
“Not as bad as I have it for you (Y/l/n). So what do you say? Meet me at 7 at the Brewhouse?” Jaymi wasn’t being pushy about it, but his tone made Severus grimace as he fled from the small restaurant, placing some muggle money on the counter top.
Here he was again. Bested by another man. James Potter had married Lily and Harry had been born as a constant reminder of the torture of his youth. At least, at that time, he had (Y/n) to support him and make sure that he didn’t get in too deep with the death eaters or anyone else. 
But now, he had alienated her as well and he only had himself to blame. If he hadn’t shouted at her, if he hadn’t kicked her out, they wouldn’t be in this situation.
Snape trudged his way back to his home, and as he sunk into his armchair, the tears that had once filled (Y/n)’s eyes fell from his. He was all alone, again, and he only had himself to blame.
However, if Severus had bothered to stay for a few minutes after, he may not have been feeling as hopeless as he did right now.
“Jaymi, I appreciate your offer, but I’m not in the right headspace for a relationship right now.” (Y/n) closed her laptop and slid it into the case before placing it in her bag. 
“I understand, no problem, do you still want to go out to the Brew though? As friends of course. I knew you wouldn’t want to be with me as soon as that emo looking guy came in to get himself some coffee.” Jaymi sipped at his tea before collecting (Y/n)’s cup for washing.
“Jaymi, how did you know that I liked him?” (Y/n) was puzzled as she looked at her friend disappearing behind the counter.
“You should have seen your own face when he spoke. It looked like you were about to cry, scream for joy, and then jump into his arms.” Jaymi smiled. “It’s the exact look I had when I was taking a break from my ex.”
“Oh, that’s interesting. Sev and I have been friends since we were kids. We work together actually.” (Y/n) smiled at Jaymi who returned his own flash of teeth.
“Oh let me guess what he teaches. Art?”
“Nope.”
“Drama?”
“Wrong again Jaymi.”
“English?”
“No Jay. I’ll give you a hint. It’s a science.”
“Physics then. I have yet to meet a non eccentric physicist.” Jaymi said confidently.
“Chemistry, Jaymi. He teaches both lower and higher level chemistry.”
Jaymi smacked himself on the forehead. “Why didn’t I think about that? He totally has a mad scientist vibe! You go get him love!”
(Y/n) gave a smile and left the cafe, bidding Jaymi farewell. Having friends was a complicated enterprise. And being in love was an even more difficult one.
As (Y/n) slipped into her bed that night she had no idea that her brooding crush was doing the same, both of them aching for the same thing, but only one convinced that they could achieve it.
Author’s Note: Thank you for requesting. Please send in more so I can write more please. Yes Jaymi is named that on purpose. If you catch the subliminal tie to Snape’s past you get a cookie from me.
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pizzaapplecheese · 3 years
Text
Donald and Daisy’s relationship in tlottc
this is my opinions on what is going on and their relationship and there will defiantly be spoilers and maybe a bit of bias, anyways on to my review
we first see Daisy and Donald’s relationship in the first episode, we are introduced to Daisy when she called Donald on the phone, she says that she can't wait for their date and that she wants him to hurry because she was waiting for him in a place she felt unsafe in, Donald says he will, but then he got a phone call from his boss asking him why he was late, Donald was confused by that because he thought he has a day off on his birthday (which funny enough was Friday 13 XD) anyways his boss said if he doesn’t come as soon as possible he would have to fire Donald, Donald rushed into his job and was on his last costumer, a kid who refused to get his haircut which got Donald angry and he tried to cut the boy’s hair so hard that he accident shaved it and he got fired, just like his house since he forgot to remove the kettle on the stove, remember Daisy? Donald forgot to tell her that he suddenly busy that day so she thought he stood her up and dumped him, which is understandable.
the first episode was to show how bad Donald’s life is by showing a bunch of misunderstandings, bad-luck, and having zero proper communication, the first episode have him lose his job, girlfriend, and house all in one day which ironically was his birthday, even though her breaking up with Donald was justified we were presented with Donald having so many problems going around in the span of half a day that I felt a little bit annoyed with Daisy suddenly calling him and calling him selfish.
the next time we see daisy was in episode 5 (which I assume was at least a month and a half in their universe), she visits Donald in his new house when April, May, and June told her the Donald was doing better according to Daisy. Donald says that they should go eat in a restaurant so she can meet the “new Donald” Donald recommended the greasy pan, the rust skillet, and the burnt onion (which Panchito says he finds delicious) all of which she was disgusted in, until her nieces says that he was messing around an was actually going to take her to Shake Quackmore (which is a very rich restaurant) and her response was “oh that is so 2.0″ when Donald heard that she liked the idea he stopped panicking on how expensive that is and instead went along just to make her happy, on the date they talked about what Donald was doing after they left, Xandra says he was not allowed to tell her about the three caballeros or else she would be in danger, so he lies to her on what he was doing, she then talks about the reason she dumped Donald which was she said “one of the reasons we broke up is that i could never count on you, you are always leaving me stranded” anyways back with the others, they were in serious trouble with the lava queen thing and they needed Donald to help them so Xandra took Donald and pretty much yelled “DONALD, Panchito and Jose are in trouble” and donald being a good friend that he is tells her that he needs to go because his friends needed him which for some reason she was angry at, when Xandra and Donald left Xandra tells him to not worry and that she was sure that daisy would understand with Donald replying “you don’t know Daisy” after Donald helped his friends he ran back to the restaurant and asked Daisy to forgive him, but Daisy left. Her nieces gave Donald a letter Daisy wrote to him that says “Donald, you are just as angry, undependable, and selfish as you always were. Don’t ever call, email, text, write, video conference, speak time or smoke signal me ever again, however the service her was excellent, 4 stars”.
okay, so the first half was okay, like she was just visiting Donald and seeing how he was doing, which I think was okay. I find it a little strange she was disgusted by Donald’s choice of restaurants until her niece stepped in and recommended a very expensive restaurant but I brushed it off, after that when she talks about the reason she broke up with Donald, if you forgot then this is what she said “one of the reasons we broke up is that i could never count on you, you are always leaving me stranded” which although i know their relationship is based on misunderstandings and confusion i must say if anyone is making you feel like you cant count on them and is always leaving you stranded then leave them you dont need them, relationships are built on trust and if you can’t count on someone on anything then there is no reason to be in a relationship with them, anyways back on topic Donald left because his friends are in trouble which you would expect your partner to understand, but nope Daisy straight up wrote him a letter telling him that he is still angry (which not once have he was ever shown to be angry when she was around) undependable, and selfish which i find strange that he was considered selfish when she and Donald was told by Xandra straight to their faces that Panchto and Jose were in trouble, l am just confused by that, also the fact the Donald knew she was going to react like that kinda urks me if you know what i mean.
In the next episode Donald was upset that Daisy broke up with him again so he pretty much was bitter for the whole episode and easily snapped at his friends like when Panchito ask/sang if anyone got a book and braille Donald yelled “oh shut up” or when Panchito said that Donald was unemployed homeless and single before he met Xandra Donald shoved Panchito’s face on his food, it wasn’t even a light or joking way either, he just shoved his face on it.
honestly, as much as I love Donald he was pretty much an ass, I mean I understand he was upset because he broke up with his girlfriend again but he should seriously calm down.
in episode 7 we see Daisy again and this time she is introducing Donald to her new boyfriend Dapper Duck and when he asks what she was doing (didn’t she just said 2 episodes ago to not communicate with her ever again????) she said this to Donald “well, I was in the neighbourhood for the gala and I thought I should stop by and introduce you to my date new date dapper duck” “we meet after you abandon me at Shake Quackmore” Donald ran off after that because there was a bear he needed to catch for the plot, we see Daisy again when she talks to Dapper about how Donald was acting when she introduced him saying “he usually isn’t that weird” (cue Donald being weird XD).
I honestly see no point in Daisy visiting Donald show her ex her new boyfriend what-so-ever like you broke up with him and the creator made it clear as day that these 2 were not on speaking terms, I see no reason for her to act this way other than being an ass.
in episode 8 we got to see Donald’s magnificent portrait of dapper that I jus-
back on topic episode 9 Daisy calls Donald and tells him that this was his “last chance” and to “not stood me up”, Donald was so excited but there was another mission so the nieces made a plane in which they pretend to be Donald’s body while Donald uses the phone mirror which surprisingly works for some time even if the date felt awkward, but at least we got this funny scene where Jose thought Donald was talking to him when he told Daisy her outfit looks cute on her, back with Daisy who is slow dancing with ‘Donald’ but ultimately the mirror fell off and Daisy gets mad at Donald and says these “Donald Duck what is going on here?!” “what kind of sick joke is this, using my nieces for one of your weird schemes” and when Donald tried to explain she broke the mirror phone and says “Then explain this!” which leads into Donald's temper tantrums that get him Panchito and Jose disqualified.
there is nothing much to say other than the date was awkward and Daisy does not allow explanations (like teachers when you are late to class) and breaks property, like do you know how expensive that could have been?????
in episode 12 Xandra wants Donald to be on 100% focus so she took Donald and Daisy to seek therapy and couple counselling in the Himalayas called the Shang li la, these 2 gets pampered, although Donald was a bit aggressive and shove one of the employees because he they gave him water when he didn’t ask for it? anyways the Shang li la resorts pointed out Donald's anger issues and placed him n a room to face it and he gets beat up by an angry birds egg surprise version of himself that represents his anger issues and realizes all of his problems were caused by his anger, they leave the resort and when they fly out the bathtub that the pet bear was taking a shower from we get the most Hollywood drama-action movie scene ever.
I like how they take couple counselling but these twos relationship made me feel as if it wasn’t really the ‘fix’ they needed, but the whole “where are you going???” “to my destiny” scene made up for that for how over the top it was
we finally see her again in the last episode we see daisy helping the nieces with papers and made a joke about how much she is into puzzles and when Shellgoose loses his presidency they gave them a letter that says that Donald owns the institute, as they walk in the house Daisy and Donald have this conversation in which she says that they would need to work on Donald's wardrobe (and you could kinda see them arguing in the background)
there was nothing really important for me to point tbh
conclusion: I see their relationship as pretty annoying in all honesty, maybe if we saw more on Daisy’s side/point of view or have her not break up with Donald 3 times in 13 episodes then it might have fixed some things, their relationship in this show was a wasted opportunity and they could have done better things with it, I felt confused on why Donald was in love with her and why she keeps popping up for no reason like she doesn’t even check up on how her nieces were doing anytime in this show
Edit: I would like to hear other people's opinions
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fanficflaneuse · 4 years
Text
One Day - Part 6
A/n (and disclaimer): Dear magical tumblr friends, I’m really moved by the great reception this series has had. It is my baby, my first series and also my way of  navigating through these trying times. I hold it dear to my heart and knowing you guys like it just makes me ten times happier. Thanks for all the love and support. 
Having said that, please don’t hate me for this chapter. It’s peak drama. It can’t get much worse than this (in this series, at least). It broke my heart a little, tbh, but it is important. There’s angst. Both Draco and Ernie behave like arseholes. A little bit of swearing...I’m crossing my fingers for you to like this. 
I have also have some news. Remember when I said on the last A/N that chapter 5 was the middle of the series? I lied a tiny bit. I had planned for 10 parts. Now we have 12 lol So this is the actual half of the series.
Dear anon who sent me that angsty / fluffy request, if you’re reading this, last night I came up with a very detailed story line which I’m really excited about. I’ll write that as soon as I finish all of this. 
This part includes a quote of Wuthering Heights by Emily Brönte. Also, one or two quotes come from the actual movie.  
Anyway, enjoy! 
Draco x reader (she/her pronouns) Word count: 2184  Summary: One day AU. Post-war. Since The Battle of Hogwarts, Draco and y/n meet one day a year.
Masterlist
3 May, 2003
(Y/N) sat in the farthest corner of an intimate muggle restaurant. She looked at her wristwatch for what had to be the twentieth time. Draco was two hours late. By now, (Y/N) figured she shouldn’t be surprised. What disconcerted her the most was the fact that she had waited for him. She was about to ask for the check and apparate back home when he waltzed into the restaurant. The man who (Y/N) saw approaching to her was not the sweet and very troubled friend she cuddled with, but rather the asshole that used to bully her and her friends back in school. He walked with his chest puffed, a cocky smile on his lips and an arrogant expression on his face. He was not her Dray, but rather Malfoy.
It took her no time to figure out he had been drinking. (Y/N) rolled her eyes, trying to disguise the hurt and disappointment she felt. He regarded her seriously for a minute. Draco hadn’t seen (Y/N) since that incident at the manor. They tried really hard to keep in touch. Draco’s life at the moment, though, didn’t allow for a lot of profound communication, mainly because he wasn’t honest, not even with himself. He’d drink every single day and party every other night. He’d wake up with strangers, squander his fortune in casinos and pick up stupid fights. Without fail, their owls would travel back and forth every week, but the letters sometimes mounted to absolutely nothing.
Seeing her in front of him, Draco found (Y/N) as beautiful as ever. He realized he was still in love with her, despite his efforts to drown his feelings for her – along with everything else. Perhaps, as contradictory as it sounds, the frustration he felt while having (Y/N) (Y/L/N) in front of him, made him behave like his old self. She was a symbol of everything he wanted and couldn’t have, of every bad thing he thought about himself, of how undeserving and inadequate he was. Much like when he was in school, all of that turned him into an absolute prick. 
Draco asked for a whiskey. As he did so, he checked the waitress out. (Y/N) scoffed.
“What?” he defended, as the redhaired waitress walked away, “she’s pretty for a muggle.”
(Y/N)’s eyes widened. He had changed so much in three years after the war…and now he made comments that took her back to her first few years at Hogwarts. (Y/N) wondered why had she accepted his invitation for dinner in the first place. What was she expecting, really? Her friend – if you could call him that at this point – was not there anymore. He was replaced with the insufferable git Draco Malfoy was meant to be all along.
“So,” he said, trying to diffuse the tension, “what’s new with you?”
(Y/N) didn’t feel much like speaking to him right now. She looked away. Draco was hurt by this, but he pressed on. He needed her confirmation that he was a tosser. He needed her to tell him that he was worthless, that she didn’t love him or believed in him. He needed that reminder because he wanted to kiss her so badly, but he knew he wasn’t good enough for her. He wasn’t good enough for her love or her forgiveness or faith. He wasn’t good enough for redemption. He was a villain. He had been, anyway. And people believed it. So, he had to play his part.
“Are you still with MacMillan?” he asked, trying to act nonchalant, as if the news of her relationship hadn’t affected him deeply.
As (Y/N) nodded, Draco’s whole body was filled with jealousy. He knew he couldn’t be with her. He knew she was better off with someone like Ernie MacMillan than himself.
And yet.
(The combination of those two words seemed to haunt him whenever (Y/N) was the topic).
“Even you can do better than that,” he spat.
He was being so nasty that his self-hatred was reaching dangerous levels. People believed this façade to be his true colours, even more than when he actually tried to reveal himself as he truly was. Why, then, wasn’t (Y/N) leaving? Why was she still sitting in front of him? Why would she look at him with those wounded eyes, with that broken heart, and yet keep giving him chances?
The waitress came back with their drinks. The brief interruption allowed (Y/N) to take a deep breath. She still didn’t know what she was doing there. Even if it was her love for him that glued her to the table, at this point he had already exceeded what was acceptable and even healthy. She was on the verge of tears.
“Why are you behaving like your idiotic Hogwarts self?” she asked.
“Speaking about Hogwarts, how’s the teaching?” he countered, completely ignoring her question.
(Y/N) sighed and for some reason decided tell him. Maybe that would shift the atmosphere a little. She told him that her approach to DADA tried to resemble professor Lupin’s: theory and practice in every single class. (Y/N) talked so passionately about her job and her students that it was hard for Draco not to hang onto her every word. For a second there, (Y/N) saw the ghost of a genuine smile playing on his lips. In that fleeting moment, she felt satisfied.
This feeling, of course, came crashing down with his scornful remark: “that’s good enough, I guess”.
“What is that supposed to mean?” she asked through gritted teeth. She wished he had just shrugged it off again, but he had an answer ready and he shot to kill.
“Well, (Y/N), you know what they say,” he said, not even meeting her eyes. His finger was playing with the rim of his empty glass.
“No, Draco, enlighten me. What do they say?” she asked, bracing herself for a scathing remark.
“Those who can, do; those who can’t, teach,” he answered offhandedly.
(Y/N) felt the anger scorching her insides. She glared at him, a fire in her eyes Draco hadn’t seen in the longest time. In that moment, all of her sadness fuelled her irritation as she stood up. The seat fell behind her.
“And she who can’t will hex you,” she stammered before stomping out of the restaurant.
Draco had finally pushed away the only person that believed in him. He thought he was going to feel a bit better, given that had sacrificed himself for her safety. She deserved better. Then why was he feeling so empty and stupid? Leaving more money than he had to on the table, he rushed after his best friend. Draco followed her to an alley where she was about to apparate. He grabbed her by her hand and noticed she was crying.
“What do you want, Draco? What else do you want?” her voice was hoarse and desperate.
“I – I’m sorry,” he murmured.
(Y/N) had to conjure all of her self control to answer to him. “I don’t know what’s the reason for you to put up this horrible façade, Draco. I can read right through you and I trust this…this git I had the misfortune of spending my evening with is not the real you. But I can’t do much about it. Do you want to live your life as the entitled prick you were back in school? So be it.”
“(Y/N)…”
“I love you, Draco. I really do. I just don’t like you anymore.”
(Y/N) didn’t even spare him a second glance before apparating. Once alone, Draco broke down completely. This was not what it was supposed to be like. 
...
(Y/N) wiped away the tears in her eyes as she opened the door to her flat. The lights were on, every single one of them. She specifically recalled turning everything off before leaving, so she clutched her wand and walked cautiously around her duplex. Much to her relief, all she found was Ernie sitting crossed-legged in the middle of her bed. She relaxed at first, but then she realized that was also a very strange sight. (Y/N) noticed that he was clutching a notebook in his hands and was eyeing it furiously.
“What are you doing?” Ernie’s eyes shot up. She realized that the notebook he was reading was her diary and her heart almost stopped.
“What is this?” he shouted, tossing her diary at her.
(Y/N) flinched. She knew exactly what he had read and guilt started to eat her up.
“(Y/N),” he roared.
She didn’t meet his eyes, fresh tears welling on her own. Ernie picked the notebook from the ground and started reading out loud.
“I love Draco. I love him with every beat of my broken heart?!” he pressed all of his anger into very single word, “Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same.”
(Y/N) didn’t want to listen to her own foolish words. “Stop! Stop, Ernie!”
“I believe Draco feels undeserving of a good life,” he carried on anyway, “I, (Y/N), know he is undeserving of a good life.”
“Ernie, please,” she said, her voice barely audible at this point. She tried to take the book from him, but he just ran out of the room, reading and mocking her in the process.
“I hope those self-destructive behaviours don’t consume him,” he continued, “I, on the other hand, sincerely hope they do.”
When (Y/N) could finally retrieve her diary, they were engulfed by a rancorous silence. They stared at each other for the longest time, not moving an inch. She was inconsolable. His heartbreak pushed him to behave like Draco less than an hour before him.
“I am also a pureblood, (Y/N).”
“What?” the comment seemed very out of place.
“My last name is on the list of the Sacred Twenty-Eight,” he said, adopting a haughtiness she had never seen in him, “My family can be traced back to nine generations of wizards and witches.”
“Ernie, what does that have to do with anything?”
“For the past three hours or so I’ve been racking my brain, trying to think what in the world could you possibly see in Malfoy. The only logical solution I see is that you’re more biased towards blood purity than what you actually admit. Now, I can’t blame you, but –“ (Y/N)’s hand collided spectacularly with Ernie’s cheek.
Had it been a different situation, she would even feel proud about the print of her palm on his face. But rage was seeping from his every pore and (Y/N) felt humiliated. Before he could retort, she barked:
“How dare you!”
“I’ve given you everything. I tried to make this work, (Y/N). I really fancy you, love you even. But not even once have you said those three words to me and yet that…that death eater trash gets all the praise and love and poems and multiple entries on your diary? Bloody hell!” 
(Y/N) didn’t know why, but the first thing that occurred to her was to defend Draco Malfoy from Ernie: “he’s not death eater trash.” In that moment, she seriously wanted to slap herself.
Ernie looked at her as though she was insane. “Is that seriously all you got from what I just said?” he said in disbelief.
Before she could even answer he just shook his head. “You know what? Just forget about us, (Y/L/N),” he said before storming off.
(Y/N) sat down in the middle of her room. She felt like a bad person, a very stupid bad person. She had let Draco stomp all over her feelings and broke Ernie’s heart in the process. Why were feelings and relationships so hard and confusing?
All of a sudden, she felt a pair of arms engulf her in a hug. She smelled Ernie’s cologne and sobbed loudly into his chest.
“I am very sorry,” she said.
“Listen to me, (Y/N). I hope we can be friends in the future. I’m much too hurt right now…and I’d be lying if I told you I don’t resent you,” he said wiping away the tears from her eyes and forcing her to look at him. He was also crying.
“But you’re precious and I’d be honoured to have you in my life in whatever capacity,” he finished.
“I feel terrible, Ernie,” she sniffled, “but it would be an honour and a pleasure to have you as my friend…eventually.” They shared a hug and cried a little more.
When they both calmed down, things were strangely nice and light between them. Ernie praised her writing and encouraged her to publish even more.
“I know you adore your job as a teacher, love, but this,” he said pointing at the catastrophic diary, “is really your thing and the world needs more of your writing.”
(Y/N) couldn’t believe her luck. The fact that he was still here, regardless of what had just happened between them, made her heart swell. She was mesmerized by his Hufflepuff traits, his loyalty and friendliness showing up even when he was hurting.  
Before he left, he kissed her forehead and told her a few words that would haunt her dreams:  
“Be careful, princess. Malfoy really doesn’t deserve you.”
Tags: @fandomscombine @okaydraco @naomi02hook @iliketoast23 @winnsmills @oldfashionedlovergirlsblog @happycomb
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basket-of-radiants · 3 years
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I have many thoughts about KLM, I don't know where to start. They range from how the other two are going to react to Kal being benched (I mean one day he just stops showing up to fights) to an AU where Venli is captured alongside her Lady, by enemy Captain Stormblessed and is lost as to why Leshwi bantering/flirting with him. When her Lady's knight arrives to save them he just kinda curls up on Stormblessed's lap complaining about not being part of the initial kidnapping, confusing Venli more.
Thank you for talking to me about this.
1) I absolutely love how you’ve placed Venli as a fourth wheel in this gang (but imo she would not be confused, just exasperated like “oh god you guys are really doing this, you realize I’m still here right, you want me to translate what for him, fuck me and fuck your passions I guess this is happening.”)
2) I can’t really imagine a scenario wherein Leshwi gets captured unless it’s on purpose somehow, in which case Vyre showing up to “rescue” her would be even funnier.
3) I recognize that K/L/M isn’t everyone’s cup of tea, and normally when I subject you guys to massive walls of text it’s for dumb au’s involving cereal or roller skates or whatever and not shipping, so I’m gonna put a cut here before I absolutely Go Off.
Have I said. K/L/M as a knight/lady/dragon dynamic is the most perfect thing imaginable, particularly when it’s not the knight who belongs to the lady, but the dragon (INSPIRED casting for Moash), particularly when Leshwi can fill all three roles as the scene demands it, particularly when Kaladin views them both as The Enemy and they don’t view him that way.
Like, when played straight this relationship has so fucking much potential for drama and angst. Kaladin being in love with his enemies, knowing he has to fight them and trying to kill them but also knowing that if anything happened to them it would destroy him. Leshwi navigating court politics, as someone of her station consorting with a human would be scandal in of itself, but a Radiant as well? Plus trying to balance her passions for her people with those for her lovers. Moash turning himself into a monster for Leshwi’s sake, willingly becoming for her an agent of destruction but who still pines for Kaladin and would do anything not to hurt him again but who only ends up hurting him more. These three have all given up their personhood in different ways and have all become killers for the sake of others, and yet that personhood they willingly banish from themselves is what they cherish in one another. Emotionally charged fights. Combatively charged conversations. Love conquers all in the end. Or does it, maybe they’re doomed to be tragic, which also works really well.
Or if you don’t want to be all serious and want to play this fun, there are plenty of great ways to do that too. You can have Leshwi/Vyre as a power couple who keep setting one another up with a blushing and baffled Kaladin, who had really come here to fight or so he had thought, oh storms why are they smiling at him. You can have Vyre tell Leshwi all about Kaladin while holding her hand, and she goes off and sees him for the first time in a battle and afterwards Vyre is like “weeeeeell?~~” and Leshwi is like “you’re right, he’s pretty great.” You can have Kaladin confront him and say “Moash why would join Odium’s side” and he just points at Leshwi and Kaladin just says “you know what that’s fair.” (Wait I’m about to make a joke.) You can have Kaladin and Leshwi together and Kal is like “fuck Moash?” and Leshwi is like “oh absolutely” and Kaladin whistfully goes “yeah me too.” (There I made a joke, you’re laughing now.)
These three are the perfect trio for fight-flirting because they’ve all tried to kill each other in every combination on different occasions. Plus if you want to make it cute and light, nowadays they can all regenerate, so they’re fine. I also love the idea of them teasing each other over one another’s combat prowess. (M: “Wow Leshwi you treat all the guys who kill you like this?” L: “I mean yes, but also Kaladin has never actually beaten me, I lied.” M: “Really? Wow I guess I’m just better at fighting than both of you then ;)” K: “Oh yeah, do you want to step outside and fucking try me? ;)”)
Okay, I see your “Leshwi gets captured” au but what about one where Kaladin gets captured instead, like Lezian or someone are going to kill him and Leshwi makes a deal where if she can keep him safe if he’s her prisoner so she uses one of those suppressor fabrials. Maybe Vyre goes to talk to him and Kaladin knows he should just kill him but is still in love with him so he’s willing to hear him out anyway and then it turns out to have been a setup so you can have more tragic betrayals between them, but once he’s been captured Leshwi and Vyre still spend a lot of time with him and Kaladin is like “wait hold on, you two are actually important, can we negotiate for peace” and Leshwi’s like “neither of us are actually representatives of our respective sides” and Kaladin is pleading with her like “please, no one on my side believes talking to you is even possible but they’re wrong" and he tries to instill idealism into her jaded soul. And then eventually Leshwi agrees to try and she lets him go so he can arrange a meating from his end. Bonus points if he has to kill her in order to “escape” so that the other fused don’t think she’s a traitor. So he goes back to Uritiru or whatever. And even more bonus points if Vyre didn’t know about this plan and so he goes after him pissed that he killed Leshwi, and Kaladin is able to calm him down but it’s too late he’s been noticed, so the other humans are like “holy shit that’s the traitor” and Vyre is like “bite me” and Kaladin is trying to protect him while he’s being very hard to protect. Like Kaladin will panic and say something like “it’s okay he’s changed” and Vyre will be like “I have not and I am not sorry” and Kaladin is like “you are making my life so hard right now.” Anyway, Leshwi comes back obviously and eventually there’s a meeting and idk how it goes but Kaladin and Vyre and Leshwi probably elope at some point, and holy shit what am I doing.
God. How does writing fanfic work. Someone help. I think we need something longer form for this.
Another idea I like inspired by your ask is a Venli-centric story wherein she’s a personal courier to Leshwi and since her Lady has to keep up appearances (plus she’s too busy with her own political career), Venli is the one tasked with facilitating a secret courtship between her and Kaladin, an enemy knight. Moash is sent with her for protection and Venli 1) is confused by the chemistry he seems to have with both of them and 2) is growing increasingly exasperated by how the fairly utilitarian demands, decrees, and warnings she carries seem to be getting gushier every time she’s sent with a new one. It wouldn’t be so bad but Kaladin can’t fucking read so she has to read it all out loud to him and then write down his responses herself. Her escort seems unphased by the fact that the two people he fancies are obviously trading love letters. Venli just wants to help her people, okay? She doesn’t have time for this shit.
Honestly there’s a lot to explore insofar as a domestic relationship with these three too. I’m just imagining a scene where Leshwi starts humming something and Kaladin just turns to Moash and is like “...what is she saying” and Moash is just “uhhhh I think she’s sad about something-no wait--?” Or like, the dynamic of Moash being super casual about how he treats the relationship and Kaladin being super solemn and Leshwi being super passionate.
Or you could go for a thing where Moash is a classic bad boy who Kaladin is trying to bring back to the light except he kind of loves Leshwi and kind of wishes he was working with her too. I kind of also like Kaladin and Moash and Leshwi getting together with no parties being rehabilitated or changed or anything. (K: “I hate this guy.” M: “Okay, I’ll kill him for you then :)” K: “NO!!!!!!!!!!!” while Leshwi iweighs the argument of both those statements.)
There is just so much potential. You don’t understand. There’s so much.
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adariasakura · 4 years
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Here are just a couple of incredible things about the Hamilton musical now on Disney+:
The EMOTION. The ACTING. The FACES. All the NUANCES.
how Hamilton looks at Eliza right as he leaves before “History Has It’s Eyes on You.”
King George. Everything about him. Just...everything about him. He was LIVING for the drama. “The Reynold’s Pamphlet” was such an exciting time for him. He was so happy. While I was not necessarily happy at that moment, I couldn’t help the spark of joy I felt when I saw him hopping around the stage with glee as Hamilton’s life fell apart. Ah, comic relief at its finest.
The PURENESS of Anthony Ramos as Laurens and Philip. The way you could SEE Hamilton (Lin Manuel-Miranda) in him during “Blow Us All Away.”
Laurens’ Interlude. God, it hurt so bad. Hamilton’s face as Eliza reads the letter, as she tells him its not from Laurens, but from his father? The way Laurens is singing out his passions and his dreams and his hopes feet from Hamilton, the way Hamilton looked as he realized those dreams had died with Laurens. The way he pulled himself together much too quickly for it to be genuine, how he just walked away from Eliza and said that he had so much work to do.
LESLIE ODOM JR. IN “WAIT FOR IT” OML MUST I SAY MORE? HONESTLY HIM IN THE ENTIRE THING, HE DESERVED THAT TONY
The way Eliza looks at Hamilton at the end of “Helpless”... there is just so much LOVE in her eyes and acceptance of him, of who he is and of what he lacks. And just the way she always repeats how she doesn’t need money, or a legacy. Eliza burning the letters, the raw emotion in her voice as she screams out how the world has no right to her heart, to them. And don’t get me STARTED on the way she ran in during “Stay Alive Reprise,” or the way she held Philip as he died, or the way she screamed when he finally did. And in “Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Tells Your Story,” just watching her sing about everything she did, and the way she got so quiet and soft and proud about the orphanage...and then the way she just melted when she saw Hamilton...I believe she is underrated.
“IT’S QUIET UPTOWN.” HAMILTON’S EMOTION. THE WAY HE LEADS ELIZA “AROUND TOWN,” THE WAY YOU CAN SEE THE MOMENT HE BREAKS WHEN ELIZA GRABS HIS HAND AND FINALLY REPLIES WITH “IT’S QUIET UPTOWN” AND THEY SING “FORGIVENESS” BEHIND THEM AND HE JUST BREAKS DOWN. HE WASNT THE ONLY ONE SOBBING I’LL TELL YOU THAT MUCH.
Daveed Diggs. Hilarious. Amazing. So much fabulous attitude. Incredible.
Angelica is such a badass, but her moments of vulnerability are just as amazing. “Satisfied” was everything I hoped it would be, and more. What a powerful woman — actress and the real thing.
The bullet that narrowly flies over Hamilton’s head as he unknowlingly sits over his letters during “Stay Alive” (I think that’s right). So symbolic. So COOL. Who THINKS OF THESE THINGS???
How Hamilton (Lin) continuously mocks other characters. The way he’ll change the tone of his voice and stomp around and make them look like fools. He is just so hilariously petty and childish and knows EXACTLY how to press other people’s buttons (in the best way) and I was LIVING for it.
“Your Obedient Servant.” Basically, “I hate you, go die, love your obedient servant, A. Burr/Ham.” Beautiful.
The CHOREOGRAPHY OF “The Room Where It Happens.” Study it. Worship it.
The scene during Hamilton + Burr’s duel right before they pulled the triggers, as Hamilton considered his death. As he considered his legacy, as he saw all the people he’d lost, as he saw Eliza, and as he let her go, wishing for her to have more time than him. Promising he’d see her on the other side. His last words as he raised the gun, the sheer emotion in his voice and on his face as he said, “Raise a glass to freedom.” What INCREDIBLE writing, stage directing, music, lighting, EVERYTHING. Truly indescribable.
The finale. Everything about it. And I know I already talked about this, but when Eliza and Hamilton are reunited? Now that hits. The way George Washington stepped back in shame when Eliza boldly and proudly proclaimed how she spoke out against slavery? Eliza’s gasp of elation at the very end right before the lights go out, when she’s finally reunited with everyone she’s ever loved, as she knows she did it. She told his story. She used her time in the way he would have. And now, she could rest knowing that.
Thomas Jefferson just shaking his head no over and over when Madison tells him to try to get Hamilton’s endorsement. Exquisite.
“Dear Theodosia.” You could see it in their eyes. Hear it in their voices. It just made Philip’s death all the more crushing.
George Washington and Hamilton’s relationship. QUALITY. “One Last Time.” Q U A L I T Y.
Honestly I know I am missing so much, but there is no need to fret because I will be watching this again tomorrow and then daily for a while (as you do). I am going to pick up so much more and y’all get to hear more about just how incredible Hamilton is. Without a doubt the best thing I’ve ever seen. If you haven’t listened/watched, please please do so. It’ll change your life.
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camillemontespan · 4 years
Text
ten years from now [AU. drake walker x camille montespan] [part thirteen: breaking & entering]
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Warnings: None. Some swear words because it’s Drake.
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Drake heard the front door of an apartment open and so followed the sound, knowing Camille would be on the other end. He needed to see her. He needed to get to her door, take her into his arms and kiss her all over, never letting her go, and tell her he had screwed everything up and he was sorry, so very sorry, he would never give her a reason for him to be sorry ever again and all he wanted from now on was to make her happy, deliriously happy, fuck everything and anyone else, only Drake knew how to make her happy--
He stopped near the top of the stairs when he saw her face. 
**********************************
‘Camille?’ he croaked.
Her eyes were red rimmed and bloodshot from crying. Her hair was pulled back from her face which only served to highlight the hollowness of her eyes; it was disconcerting. 
‘Hey Drake,’ Camille whispered.
Drake took the remaining stairs two at a time, stumbling over his feet as he rushed to reach her. He took her by the hands; she felt loose. 
‘What happened?’ he demanded.
Camille closed her eyes, her lips quivering. ‘Come in,’ she murmured. 
Drake followed her inside, practically holding his breath. He felt as if the wind had been taken out of his sails and he was now just floating without a destination. It was only when he set foot into the hallway that he now realised that he was in her apartment. No, scratch that. Camille and Liam’s apartment.
He swallowed down the realisation that he shouldn’t be here.
What did he expect to happen? He would come to her door and declare his love and she would cast off her engagement ring, throw herself into his arms and scream, ‘YES! TAKE ME BACK TO TEXAS! I WILL CANCEL MY RIDICULOUSLY EXPENSIVE WEDDING AND BREAK MY FIANCEE’S HEART IN THE PROCESS, ALL FOR A MAN I DATED TEN YEARS AGO! LET’S DO IT!’
Drake realised he was a fucking idiot. 
As Camille led him through the apartment, Drake couldn’t help but take in his surroundings. The hallway was painted a dove grey, a classy colour, and pictures were hung up artistically on the walls. Black and white photos of cities like Rome and Paris. Black and white photos of Liam and Camille, looking happy and in love. 
When they reached the living room, Drake felt like he had landed in a world that didn’t belong to him. He had entered without asking. Breaking and entering. 
On top of the ornate fireplace was an ornamental decoration made of little wooden letters: C + L.’ They were that couple. They had their fucking initials decorated around their home. To dig the knife in deeper, there was yet another black and white photograph of the two of them. They were both on the beach, snuggled into each other, smiling and holding up bottles of beer, clearing saying ‘cheers’ to the camera. Drake hadn’t realised that Camille liked beer. 
All around the apartment were little details that showed Drake their relationship. The photographs. The wooden initials. The fucking wedding magazines that were stacked up on the coffee table. 
Camille turned to face him with her arms crossed. ‘So,’ she said. ‘Why are you here?’
Drake blinked. His throat was so dry. ‘Where’s Liam?’ he rasped.
‘He’s gone,’ Camille told him, raising her chin. 
‘Gone?’
‘Yes,’ Camille said, her voice blunt. ‘I told him the truth. He’s taken a bag and has left.’
Drake stepped back in shock. No wonder she looked like she had been crying. ‘Oh god, Camille-’
‘So whatever it is you’re here to say, just spit it out because quite frankly, I’ve had enough drama,’ Camille interrupted. ‘I’ve hurt Liam and I feel disgusted with myself. I broke his heart for nothing and I will never forgive myself.’
Drake dug his fingernails into his hands, trying to keep himself calm. He kept his eyes on her, trying to summon the courage to tell her how he felt. How she made him happy. How he had always loved her. How nobody had compared to her in the ten years since. But he couldn’t get the words out; they were lodged in his throat, refusing to escape. 
Camille closed her eyes. ‘Drake, I’m tired,’ she muttered. ‘The last time I saw you, we argued and I said I needed space. Now you’re here, in my apartment, in New York by the way, not giving me space. We have made a total mess of everything and here you are, making it messier! I thought we had nothing more to say to each other? I thought you were angry with me. I thought we were done-’
‘We will never be done!’ Drake finally burst out. He hadn’t meant to shout. He hadn’t meant to interrupt her. But the idea that he and Camille were done had ignited terror in his heart. They couldn’t be done. Not now. Not after everything.
Camille’s eyes widened. ‘Drake-’
‘No, fucking listen to me,’ Drake cut in. He stepped towards her, renewed energy flooding his veins now. Camille kept her eyes on him as her chest rose and fell with nerves.  Drake looked down at her now, keeping his voice steady as he began to speak again.
‘It’s been ten years,’ he said. ‘I know that’a fucking long time to hold a torch for somebody but trust me when I tell you that you are worth every single minute. Nobody else has compared to you since, no one. I always kept my feelings down deep inside because I thought we would never see each other again but now, you’re back in my life, even if the circumstances are different. As soon as I saw you sitting in my mom’s kitchen, looking like a fucking New York socialite, I knew I was done for. Because I still knew and loved the girl inside you. The Texas girl who likes whiskey and adores riding horses. The girl who gets lost inside mazes, has no sense of direction, can’t see in the fucking dark, and who has the most adorable laugh I’ve ever heard in my life. I could still see that you were the same, even when you look different and act different. You’re still my Camille.’
His feelings had come to the surface.
‘And then we started hangin’ out again and everything came back, every single feeling that I had pushed down just exploded to the surface. I was practically drowning in you. But I didn’t care because you were all I wanted. Sure, you were with Liam but in those moments when we were alone, I could pretend that you were mine. I got lost with you.’
Camille was staring with huge eyes as she listened to Drake’s words pour from him. He was word vomiting like she often did. He couldn’t stop talking. 
‘I was a kid when we dated,’ he said. ‘I was immature. I couldn’t handle my feelings and I shut you out when really, all I wanted was to talk to you. I didn’t realise how fucking good I had it with you. But I’m older now and I know what I want; what I want is standing right in front of me.’
He reached out to graze her jaw with his finger. Camille swallowed but she didn’t move away. Drake took this as a promising sign and continued to speak, his voice growing stronger.
‘I’m sorry I fucked everything up for you and Liam,’ he said. ‘I was selfish. I’m sorry I’ve caused you pain. But if you will let me, I will try every day for the rest of my life to take that pain away and only give you reasons to be happy.’
Camille opened her mouth to speak but Drake bulldozed through; like his mother, he realised.
‘I wanna take you back to Texas,’ he said. ‘I wanna be with you every day. I want to wake up next to you and fall asleep beside you. I want to marry you and have babies with you. I want to celebrate 4th of July with you. I want endless summers filled with whiskey, horse riding, homemade lemonade and peaches. I want moments with you by the jetty, just watching the sun set. I want to be the best possible version of myself with you and I want to watch you achieve your hopes and dreams. I want a life with you, Camille. I fucked up ten years ago but I promise, I’ll never do it again. I know what I want and it’s you.’
He took a breath. His eyes bore into hers; she looked like she was about to faint. 
‘It’s always been you,’ he murmured. ‘Always.’
************************************
There was a long, horrible silence. They stared at each other for what felt like eternity and Drake knew he couldn’t take back anything he had just said. But he had meant it. He wanted her to know. She had to know how he felt and if she told him to leave, then so be it. At least, for the first time in his life, Drake had opened up. 
‘I need a drink..’ Camille whispered. 
Drake nodded. ‘I get that.’
‘Do you want one?’
‘Please.’
He followed her into the kitchen. Drake’s eyes instantly went to the calendar on the wall that was emblazoned with the words WEDDING COUNTDOWN.
Oh dear God.
Camille brought out two glasses and a bottle of vodka. She poured the alcohol into the glasses and handed one to Drake; the vodka seared his throat, making his eyes water.
‘No whiskey?’ he joked, trying to make the mood light.
‘Liam doesn’t drink it,’ Camille said dryly. She tossed back her vodka and didn’t flinch.
Drake eyed her warily. He had no idea what she was thinking. He had expected two reactions; either she would kick him out of the apartment or she would fling herself at him, kissing him with abandon. 
She was doing neither of those things. 
For the first time in his life, Drake had no idea what Camille was thinking.
*******************************
When Camille finished her second glass, she leaned against the kitchen counter and looked down at the floor with her eyebrows furrowed in concentration. Drake stood awkwardly by the stove, unsure of what to do with himself. 
‘I’ve wanted you to say those things to me for ten years,’ Camille finally whispered, her voice cracking. Drake held his breath as he listened to her, too scared to say something that would make her retreat. 
‘You’ve finally said everything I’ve ever wanted you to say,’ she continued. ‘And I feel.. Strange. Like, happy but sad at the same time, you know?’
Drake nodded silently. Camille looked at him now and rubbed her eyes harshly. When she spoke again, her voice was very small and fragile. Drake wanted to just hold her and tell her all would be alright, but he stayed put.
‘Sad because I’ve hurt Liam,’ she said. ‘But happy because you love me.’
‘I’ve always loved you,’ Drake murmured. 
‘And I’ve always loved you, deep down,’ she replied. ‘I never really let Liam in, I can see it now. He had no chance. I agreed to marry him but I knew, deep down, that it wasn’t what I really wanted. I’m a bad person, Drake. I lead him on. He told me he deserves better and I can’t dispute that.’
Drake sighed. ‘You make mistakes, we all do. We just gotta learn from them.’
Camille shrugged. ‘I know. But now, you’ve told me all of this and I need to work out how to move forward.’
They were talking very diplomatically here. Like it was a business deal. The idea that Drake and Camille would end their deep talk in a display of fiery passion was fading by the minute. 
‘I’ve got a wedding to cancel,’ Camille said. ‘I’ve got a grandma to look after-’
‘You’re gonna look after Gisele?’ Drake interrupted, surprised. ‘But she’s in Texas.’
‘Yeah?’ Camille said, her voice questioning. ‘I know that. I’m going to be coming back to Texas to look after her when she’s out of hospital.’
Drake’s heart leaped. She was coming back to Texas. She would be near him again-
As if she knew what he was thinking, Camille sighed. ‘I need time to process all of this,’ she told him quietly. ‘I’m coming back to Texas, I don’t know for how long but my priority right now is grandma.’
Drake’s heart sank. ‘Oh, okay. That’s understandable.’ He cleared his throat. ‘Totally makes sense..’
She moved away from the counter now and took his hand, much to Drake’s shock. He looked down at her, his eyes wide, and he could feel his heart hammering against his chest. 
‘I need time to think,’ she whispered. ‘I’ll need some space to just think about what I need to do. I’ve got a lot in my head right now, it’s overwhelming.’
Drake nodded. ‘I get that.’
Camille smiled weakly. She squeezed his hand. 
‘But I will probably want to drink whiskey by the lake once I feel clearer,’ she whispered.
Drake let out a sigh of relief. Camille smiled properly now, which made him feel better. ‘So, you’re asking for space and baby steps?’ he asked, his voice halting.
Camille nodded. ‘Baby steps.’
47 notes · View notes
spacerangersam · 3 years
Text
The Medium
a short comedy piece about family drama, ducks and ugly nightwear.
“Darling, look how big Maxwell has gotten! He’s practically fully grown now! I wonder if he still gets your mother to iron his socks...”
“He’s almost thirty, Ruth. Besides, it’s only been a year.”
“Oh sorry, but you know I can’t help it. So much has happened since we last saw him.”
“Indeed it- it has.”
“I wonder if he-”
“Sweetheart, I mean this in the kindest way possible, but could you please be quiet for a-a moment?”
Theodore was stretched out over the round table, squeezed in between an elderly woman with a ridiculous feather boa, and some scrawny pale fellow. He was on the very tips of his worn Oxfords, his long thin fingers just barely touching the Ouija planchette.
The people surrounding him in the table gasped as it slid forward.
“Terribly sorry, Theo,” Ruth apologised, leaning over to pat his shoulder. “I rather forgot you were in the middle of something.”
“It’s not your fault, it’s this blasted woman’s. If she’s so in touch with the spirit world, why can’t she sense my overwhelming need for her to fucking move?”
Both feet were now off the floor as he pushed the planchette towards the O. Almost there, almost.
“Really, there’s no need for insults.”
“Sorry sweetheart,” he said in a strained voice, “but this is- Christ- a very time-sensitive task, I’m sure you understand.”
She huffed, crossing her arms, more for the drama of it rather than actual disgust.
“I do. I just don’t think death gives us an excuse to forget our manners.”
He gave up. Theo it was. The D wasn’t even that far away, it was more energy than it was worth.
Besides, it seemed to do the trick as the five huddled around the table gasped, the youngest pale and shaking. Even the elderly woman, pale with frizzy hair seemed surprised. She hid her wide eyes behind a cough and quickly put on a mask of professionalism though.
“Theo? Does anyone on this table know a Theo?”
“I should bloody hope so,” he huffed.
“Oh look, Max has a ring! I think he’s married!” Ruth gasped.
The youngest, Maxwell, gulped and nodded. The woman next to him patted his hand, looking rather frazzled herself.
“I think I know to whom,” Theo muttered.
Ruth raised an eyebrow and adjusted her glasses, gasping when she picked up on her husband’s hint.
“Max had a brother called Theo who passed not too long ago,” the woman explained.
“Elizabeth? But I thought she was dating-”
“She was.”
“A year ago. Car accident,” Maxwell spluttered out.
“Well, I never. We’ve missed out on so much! Darling, could you ask about it?” Ruth asked.
“I’m sorry for your loss,” the medium said in a grave tone.
“I’m really sorry,” Theodore began, “but that would probably take a while to ask, and I don’t think Maxwell has the attention span for that.”
“Fair point.”
“Am I talking to Theodore Jones?” The medium asked.
Oh thank god, he thought, I don’t have to spell that one out. It didn’t hurt that the YES was close either.
“Can’t you just phase through the table?” Ruth questioned. “Wouldn’t that be easier?”
“Yes, but knowing my luck I’d just phase through the planchette too and we’d have to start all over again.”
Maxwell and Elizabeth gripped even tighter onto each other as the planchette jerked towards the YES. A tense silence fell over the table, interrupted a moment later by the medium.
“Right, well, is there anything you want to ask him or tell him, Maxwell?”
“God, don’t open the stage to him,” Theodore groaned, “he’ll only ask something stupid like if there are any pubs in heaven.”
Maxwell nodded swallowing loudly.
“I just wanted to tell him that I love him, I really do and…did he and Ruth end up in the same place? Are they-”
“Just ignore him and go to the will,” Ruth suggested.
“Good thinking.”
“I have my moments.”
W-I-L-M
“Wilm?” Maxwell queried, brows drawn close.
“Wilm?” Ruth parroted. “I know you struggle with spelling but-”
“My hand slipped!”
He tried again.
W-I-L-L
“Oh, we have a brother called Will, does he want me to pass a message on?” Maxwell asked.
“Perhaps he does. Theo, do you have a message for William?”
“Oh, for fucks sake!”
Ruth didn’t comment on that one, too busy pursing her lips and giving Maxwell a stern eye.
“He never was the brightest, was he?”
NO
W-I-L-L
L-E-G-A-L
“Oh! like his last will and testaments!” Elizabeth gasped.
“Yes!” Theodore cheered, a grin appearing on his face for the first time during this whole ordeal.
“At least one out of the pair has some brains,” Ruth mused.
She perched on the top of a spare chair, watching the amusing expressions of the living five.
“He never wrote one, did he?” Maxwell mused.
I-D-I-D
“It seems he begs to differ,” the medium commented. “Where is it??”
S-O-C-K
His hand slipped again. Dammit.
“Sock?” Maxwell read. “I don’t mean to be rude, but you had a lot of socks, Theo, could you be more specific?”
“Here, how about-”
Ruth hopped onto the table in her party shoes. She crouching down, gently brushing her husband’s fingers away from the planchette and replacing them with her own.
S-O-C-K-D-R-A-W
“Oh, thank you,” Theodore said.
“Anytime.”
He gratefully, and awkwardly, wriggled off the table, standing behind the medium instead. She shivered for a moment but otherwise didn’t react.
“Do you mean it’s in your sock drawer?” Elizabeth asked.
Y-E-S
“We should go find it right away! It could be-”
B-E-L-L-E
“Sweetheart, I thought we were just going to focus on the will?” Theodore asked.
“Well, they know about it now, let me be nosy for a minute.”
“Oh, alright. Just don’t drag it out for too long please.”
“It’s hidden in a bell?” Elizabeth wondered.
Maxwell cleared his throat, tugging at his collar with his free hand.
“No, Belle- that was the name of my ex, we parted a few months ago. Though I swear he never knew…”
Really? He didn’t think I noticed the woman he dated for over six months? Theodore thought. Well, that’s just insulting.
The table fell silent again.
“Ex? That’s all he got for me? I was the fucking light of his life!” A voice yelled.
Ruth and Theodore winced, turning to face their third ghostly companion, a young woman in a ghastly nightdress.
“Oh, Belle, I’m sorry, but we did tell you he’d likely moved on,” Ruth said gently.
Belle began to cry hysterically, with all the noise and none of the tears.
“Oh dear, don’t cry- Theodore?”
“On it.”
He made his way to the corner she had hidden in, next to the myriad of ‘unicorn’ skulls and toad bladders. He held her tightly, rocking her slightly.
“There there, he’s a cad anyway, you can do better,” he assured her.
“How? We’re in hell!”
“Not technically.”
“Wait, is this Penelope?” Maxwell asked.
Y-E-S
H-E-L-L-O
Maxwell breathed out a relieved sigh, a strained smile on his lips.
“Oh, you are together, good.”
A-N-D-B-E-L
He paled again.
“B-Belle? She’s with you? Wait, she’s dead?!”
The living members of the table turned to frown at him. He slouched down in his seat.
“She-she hadn’t been responding to any of my letters so I-I said I felt like she had been avoiding me and perhaps we should both move on.”
“Of course I couldn’t respond, I was fucking deceased!”
“Belle, he never deserved you anyway, sweetheart, let it go.”
“And did you say that in person?” The medium asked.
“Ah, no, letter.”
“…Belle, if you are here, can you tell us when you died?”
“J-June fourth,” Belle gasped out.
Theodore rubbed her back encouragingly. It was a shame she’d died in that dreadful thing, he mused. At least he and Ruth had been given the decency of going out in style.
J-U-N-E-4
Maxwell put a shaking hand to his mouth, and at his side, Elizabeth scowled.
“That was before your breakup, wasn’t it?” She asked.
He nodded.
“Maxwell Jones,” Elizabeth hissed, “I can’t believe you did that!”
“Oh god, we’re completely off track, what if he forgets about the will?” Theodore complained.
Belle began to wail louder. He winced and rubbed her back even harder, desperately trying to calm her down. It seemed to work.
“I was busy with work, I didn’t have time to check on her!”
“Oh sorry, I know this is a lot for you to handle. Do you want to go outside, perhaps? I’m sure Ruth can handle it from here,” Theo assured her.
“N-No. I want to see this through,” she sniffed.
“If I die tragically and can’t respond to your letters, I hope you’ll spare a moment to come check on me,” Elizabeth huffed.
“If you’re sure. But please do remind them of the will again, sweetheart,” Theodore called out to Ruth. “If they don’t find it, I just know they're going to hand over my collection of genuine Roman coins to father and I won't let that bastard get his greasy hands on them!”
“Oh god, not the Roman coins!” Belle sobbed. “They're one of a kind!”
“Yes, and I’d bet he'd either just pawn them for cheap or lose them down a drain like the uncultured tosser he is!”
“This day is getting worse and worse.”
“Wait, how do you know about my coin collection?”
“I showed her them once when I caught her sneaking out of Maxwell’s room at night,” Ruth explained.
“He snores,” Belle sniffed. “Loudly.”
“And you’re upset this relationship ended, because…”
She sniffed again and shrugged.
“I have bad taste?”
Theodore pursed his lips and thought about it.
“We can work on that, chin up.”
S-A-Y-S-O-R-R-Y-B-E-L-S-A-D
“Oh, of course, god, Belle, I’m so sorry. I should have suspected something was wrong and come visited you,” Maxwell said.
“You should have!” Belle loudly agreed.
“You should have,��� Elizabeth seconded, pinching Maxwell’s hand sharply.
“Ow!”
Belle sniffed and grinned a little.
“I like her.”
“She is quite something that Liz,” Theodore said. “Shame she has terrible taste too.”
“Do you think we’re done for now? This isn’t exactly a comfortable position,” Ruth commented.
Theodore and Belle shared a look, and after a moment shook their heads.
“I just want to go,” Belle sighed.
“And I believe that’s enough drama for one afterlife,” Theodore announced. “Let’s end this.”
Ruth nodded sharply and returned to the board.
W-I-L-L-G-O-F-I-N-D
GOOD BYE
A golden glow went unseen by the living, and the séance drew to a close.
***
William unlocked the door to the house and cautiously entered.
It had been left untouched, perfectly preserving the lives of its owners in their last-minute rush to get to the party on time. That is to say, it looked like a bombsight. He smiled, strained, and brushed his fingers over an abandoned coat, flung over a cupboard.
No doubt Theodore was losing his mind over the mess wherever he was, tearing out his hair as he tried desperately to find his way back to the mortal plane just to do the dusting.
A hand found its way to his back, and William turned his head to the side to face his companion.
“Remind me why we’re back here? It’s bloody miserable, like the world’s worst museum.”
“Pryce, I told you yesterday, didn’t you listen?”
The other man shrugged, hands falling to his pockets.
“Not really. You say a lot of things I don’t listen to.”
“I’m well aware.”
William sighed and gestured for Pryce to follow, making his way up the dusty stairs.
“We’re looking for Theodore’s will. Max and Liz went to a medium, claimed Theo talked to them.”
“A medium? They got more quack to them than a duck pond.”
“I agree, but you know how hard Max took the death. It is his birthday party they kicked it on after all. And the two insisted that we check, so.”
“I can believe Max buying into it, but Lizzy too? Thought she was too smart for that.”
“Well, she is with Max, so she can’t be that smart.”
“Got a point.”
They reached the top of the stairs and entered the bedroom. As with the rest of the house, it showed the remains of a panic, random dresses and ugly ties strewn about everywhere, drawers upturned and perfume spilt. They’d even turned the mattress upside down, though to what end, William would never know.
“You check Ruth’s drawers, I’ll check Theodore’s, yeah?”
Pryce’s ears went red and he shuffled on the spot, looking closer to five than fifty.
“Is that proper like?”
“Pryce, the woman’s dead, no one’s going to care if you go through her knicker drawer. Besides, you’re looking only through her socks, second drawer down.”
“Just- just making sure.”
William rolled his eyes going to Theodore’s set of drawers.
It was ridiculous, he felt, completely ridiculous. Even if the medium were legitimate, surely Theodore wasn’t stupid enough to just leave his will in his-
He saw it as soon as he opened the drawer.
“Good lord,” he gasped.
“What, you actually found it?”
“I believe so.”
He picked it up and leafed through it. It was Theodore’s hand all right, balancing the line between elegant and impossible to read. He flipped through a few more pages.
He winced.
“Aye, do us a favour and call the lawyer, will you? Father too. And tell him to bring along the coin collection on fear of death.” 
3 notes · View notes
tomorrowsdrama · 4 years
Text
Hyena Ep. 8 - The Second Drink
The second time Geum Ja and Hee Jae share a drink might just be my favorite scene of the drama so far.  Yes, even more than that kiss at the end of this episode.
Both characters, especially Hee Jae, were so emotionally bare, it kind of took me by surprise to be honest.  Up until now, we’ve only seen glimpses.  We’ve never seen them actually acknowledge their feelings and fucked up history like this.  Omg I loved every bit of it.
So after Hee Jae leaves the group dinner, he goes home and can’t help but think about Geum Ja.
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Sigh, he really latches onto everything she says.
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One of the cardinal rules of drinking is that you never call your ex when you’re drunk.  In fact, it’s best if you keep your phone tucked away somewhere so you don’t end up doing something you’ll regret when you’re sober.  Clearly, nobody told Hee Jae.
Cut for a loooooot of screencaps.  I just liked so much of the dialogue in this scene!
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I think I know what that reason is.  It’s a four lettered word and starts with an “L.”
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OMG, excuse me,  what?  Did he just say that?  I guess it’s not called liquid courage for no reason.
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Geum Ja tries to deflect and puts up her guard by joking around like usual.  However, Hee Jae doesn’t snip back and instead just gives an amused smile without contradicting what she said.  
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Even though there are other customers in the pub, the scene is framed in a way that makes it seem like they’re in their own private world. I really dig this PD’s style.
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More and more, Hee Jae realizes that their relationship was catered to only what he wanted and he really didn’t consider Geum Ja’s wants and likes.
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Omg and then he starts asking her all the questions he never asked while they were dating. I was squee-ing so hard at this part.  They’re just mundane, every day questions you would ask on a first date.  However, given their history, it’s such a huge step.  It signifies that Hee Jae wants to forget their past and get to know the real Geum Ja.  Perhaps she’s not used to having a man sincerely want to get to know her.  Or maybe she just wasn’t expecting it from Hee Jae.  But you can see that it catches her completely off-guard and she doesn’t know what to do.
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She repeats the same line she told him before, that she was never sincere with him.  Except, this time, there’s no bite or malice to it.  She’s not saying it to hurt him but to push him away.  And unlike the first time they had this conversation, Hee Jae’s face shows that he doesn’t believe her words. 
Also, the lighting, make up, and wardrobe choices for Geum Ja in this scene are considerably softer and lighter than when they had their first drunken conversation. 
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And of course she pushes him away and doesn’t let him even think of getting close to her.  Again, she doesn’t say this in a malicious tone.  But she says it as if it’s for his own good.  It’s telling that she says to find a “nice lady” who’s right for him and to maintain his dignity.  She clearly thinks they’re mismatched and he would be downgrading from his world by being with someone like herself. 
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That’s their problem.  They’re unable to have these honest conversations outside of these private settings.  It’s as if their true selves can only exist far away from everyone else.  
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And Hee Jae hits the nail on the head.  He knows that she has feelings for him too (or at least is hopeful she does) but she’s holding back because she’s afraid.  But it’s hard for Hee Jae to understand why someone as strong as Geum Ja would be so afraid of pursuing a relationship with him because: (1) he doesn’t know about her past and the baggage that comes along with that; and (2) he’s not the one that has to enter a world where everyone has done nothing but look down on him.  As someone who was born into the elite class, he’s never had to think about not being good enough for someone.  If anything, he was always the one judging whether someone was worth his time.  Therefore, it probably doesn’t even cross his mind as to why Geum Ja may have her reservations.
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Yes, get some more of that liquid courage.
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I SCREAMED, and then I died, and then i screamed again.  Omg Hee Jae is not playing around!  The thing is though, Geum Ja is just as vulnerable in this scene as Hee Jae is.  I mean, have we ever seen Geum Ja make such an expression before?  Oh girl, you’re in it now.
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I usually complain about how Netflix subtitles remove all nuances from the Korean language but I think they did a pretty good job establishing the distance Geum Ja tried to create here.  Geum Ja is clearly drawing a line by addressing Hee Jae formally, something we have not seen her do before.
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Fuck, ok I lied.  THIS part killed me.  I SWOONED SO HARD.  He is just baring heart and laying it all out there.  I don’t think I’ve ever seen a male character in a kdrama be so emotionally open and honest.  A male lead who says exactly how he feels to the heroine?  You’re shitting me.  And it’s as if his openness scares Geum Ja.  She truly did not expect him to be go all-in like that.  Girl, you shouldn’t have made him fall in love with you if you couldn’t handle it!
Despite her lying to him and the numerous times she pushed him away, Hee Jae truly DGAF.  He knows he shouldn’t want to be with her but he can’t help it.  Because fuck it, he loves her.  Y’all I need a moment here.  I think I swooned too hard and need to lie down.
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He then leaves their private little world and the shot opens up to show the rest of the patrons in the pub.
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Oh, Geum Ja.  What are you going to do now?  Just give in and let him love you!
28 notes · View notes
findmyrupertfriend · 4 years
Link
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By Alexis Soloski,  June 14, 2019
LOS ANGELES — When Rupert Friend stepped out of wardrobe on a recent Wednesday, he wore a filthy checked shirt, baggy tweed pants and boots that looked as if they could have been used as chew toys.
“Basically, we do everything you’re not supposed to do on a leading man,” said J.R. Hawbaker, the costume designer, as she adjusted a button.
David DiGilio, a writer and producer, added: “We said, ‘Don’t let him look good.”
He still looked good.
Mr. Friend, a fan favorite for his work on “Homeland,” was on a shoot for “Strange Angel,” a CBS All Access show that begins streaming June 14. It is inspired by the weird but true tale of Jack Parsons, a handsome rocket engineer in 1930s Los Angeles who joined a sex magic cult known as the Agape Lodge. (L. Ron Hubbard, the founder of Scientology, was among its guests.)
Mr. Friend plays Ernest Donovan, the next-door neighbor who introduces Jack (played by Jack Reynor) to the cult, “a place where you can be the man you always dreamed of being.”
If you’re looking for a man to lead you astray, you could do worse than Mr. Friend, who specializes in rebels, rakes and hitmen. He’s that rare Hollywood animal, a starring actor who feels genuinely dangerous, onscreen anyway. “I don’t bite,” his character says in “Strange Angel.” Then he does.
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Back From the Dead
Earlier that day, Mr. Friend, 36, had bounded into the conference room at the Paramount Pictures lot, near the sheds where “Strange Angel” shoots, wearing clothes that actually fit: a frisky corduroy suit and shining shoes.
He gave the office space a quick once-over (“It looks like you’re interviewing me for a job,” he said) before folding himself into an ergonomic chair and cracking open a mini bottle of water. In person, he is unreserved, often wry. When the motion-sensor lights kept blinking off, he said, with a deadpan, “Very energy efficient.”
So what’s a nice guy like him doing with a bad-boy résumé like his? Blame that face. “The Cro-Magnon” look, he calls it — wide forehead, frostbit eyes, a chin so square it must make mathematicians swoon. Even before he was cast as Peter Quinn, the C.I.A. assassin he played for five seasons on “Homeland,” people would assume he’d come to kill them.
“It stopped them picking fights,” he said.
That face was a brilliant fit for Quinn, introduced in Season 2 as a coldhearted operative with a soft spot for Carrie Mathison, the show’s lead, played by Claire Danes. Alex Gansa, the showrunner for “Homeland,” said that he had cast Mr. Friend, then a relative unknown, because “he had these leading man looks and yet there were deep currents running underneath.”
Quinn was meant to die in Season 5, a victim of sarin gas poisoning. But when he learned that his character would perish, Mr. Friend was asked to draft the not-quite-a-love-letter that Quinn leaves Carrie from his deathbed: “Just think of me as a light on the headlands, a beacon, steering you clear of the rocks.”
“It was so beautifully composed and wonderful,” Mr. Gansa said, that the producers brought Quinn back for Season 6. “In a way he saved himself.”
The Quinn who returned was a damaged man, weakened by a stroke, tormented by his shortcomings. Fans were drawn to Mr. Friend’s mix of reserve and vulnerability, his portrait of a man soldiering on despite serious PTSD.
When Quinn finally met his end, taking a hail of bullets to protect the president-elect, some fans were so incensed that they bought a full-page ad in The Hollywood Reporter, shaming the producers for, among other things, Quinn’s incapacity “for loving and being loved.”
“Strange Angel” is Mr. Friend’s television resurrection, and it’s a series he initially resisted when his agent sent along the synopsis. He had played enough hard men, enough dark hearts. Just because he has a type doesn’t mean he likes it. “I don’t really want to spend five years sacrificing virgins,” he said.
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His Cuddly Side
Mr. Friend grew up in a small town in Oxfordshire, England. After finishing high school he played in a band, spent a gap year traveling and then enrolled in drama school, mostly because he thought acting meant he wouldn’t have to do the same thing day after day.
While studying at the Webber Douglas Academy he was cast as Johnny Depp’s lover in “The Libertine,” a biopic about the Earl of Rochester. Then he played the lady-killer in “Pride and Prejudice,” Joe Wright’s adaptation of the Jane Austen romance, starring opposite Keira Knightley.
He and Ms. Knightley dated for several years, though they were careful to avoid mentioning each other in the media. For a long time, Mr. Friend had a contentious relationship with reporters. If you read old interviews, you’ll see he did use to bite. (In a 2008 interview with The Observer, he sits down with the reporter and dismisses the meeting as “so boring.”)
His cynicism extended to his peers. He watched some of his acting colleagues “chase a kind of fame that I wasn’t chasing,” he said. They’d find a type and play it again and again. “And then that was it. Fine. Done. Now I’m going to Malibu. Goodbye,” he said.
Mr. Friend could have easily fallen into that trap himself. In between “Homeland” seasons, he played another assassin, in the action film “Hitman: Agent 47.” The other day he was reading a script, he said, and his wife, the athlete and activist Aimee Mullins, overheard him murmuring, “‘Oh, man. Another troubled character.’ And she was like, ‘They always are.’”
But Mr. Friend is trying to show the world that he’s more than just a dour face. His Twitter and Instagram avatar is a sweet cartoon bear (from the English cartoon Rupert Bear), and many of his posts are love notes to his wife.
After “Homeland,” he took on less predictable roles. In “The Death of Stalin,” a farcical look at Soviet history, he plays Stalin’s punching bag of a son. In Julian Schnabel’s coming “At Eternity’s Gate,” he plays Theo van Gogh, the loving brother of Vincent.  
“He’s nothing like he was in ‘Homeland.’” Mr. Schnabel said. “I think he’s a sweetheart.”
In his next movie, Paul Feig’s “A Simple Favor,” a noirish thriller about mommy bloggers, he turned down a lead and instead requested the smaller role of a self-obsessed fashion designer named Dennis Nylon. Mr. Feig said he “was completely shocked because it is kind of this ridiculous part.”
And Mr. Friend can now be found on the Paramount lot, cuddling a goat, crashing a motorcycle, playing the ukulele, doing whatever else “Strange Angel” requires. After reading the scripts on an Antarctic vacation, he discovered that Ernest wasn’t really a dark character after all, or at least not entirely. He was a seeker and a poet, “the kind of guy who asks you for a beer and you know it’s going to end in jail, but you want to go anyway,” he said.
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And He Cooks, Too
Later that day, Mr. Friend arrived on location at a three-story, Craftsman-style manor in the  West Adams district in central Los Angeles that stands in for the Agape Lodge. (The original lodge was in Hollywood.)  
Correction: June 15, 2018
An earlier version of this article misstated the circumstances under which Rupert Friend wrote a letter for his character on “Homeland.” He was asked to draft the letter; he did not insist on it.
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4 notes · View notes
etherealhood · 5 years
Text
Never
author: @etherealhood
word count: 6,165
warnings: calum being the cutest partner ever, dad!calum
a/n: okay so this is my first ever calum fic and also the first thing i’ve written in a while! also i was watching tv and a state farm commerical came on and that’s what inspired this! let me know what you think and leave requests as i’d love to keep writing for cal!
pairing: calum hood x reader
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All obnoxious and drunken laughs were put to an end the moment an angry couple stumbled out of the bar, yelling profanities and shouting hurtful words at one another. Everyone in the group couldn’t help but wince as the married pair fought over something that only God could have known about.
Suddenly, the one cigarette that Calum had planned on smoking didn’t seem like it was enough. The couple had unintentionally put a damper on the calming effect that came along with a quick smoke break. He took the last drag, holding the smoke in his lungs as he dropped the finished cigarette onto the pavement and stepped on it, twisting the toe of his boot to make sure it was put out entirely as he blew out the smoke. When the arguing couple walked past the usual that typically consisted of Calum, Ashton, Luke, Michael, and the guys’ girlfriends, Calum shook his head, clearly annoyed as he pulled out his pack of smokes.
“Love fuckin’ sucks.” He grumbled, his voice raspy and deep from the drinks and smoking he’d done throughout the night. He grabbed another cigarette and placed it between his lips, digging around in his pocket for his lighter.
Ashton chuckled, nudging Calum with his elbow. “Why’re you such a grump, Cal?”
“Because love’s a scam.” He shrugged, not able to find his goddamn lighter.
How did he always manage to lose them?
“You’re tellin’ me that you don’t believe in love?” Luke asked, an eyebrow raised in surprise. He’d always been aware of Calum’s very particular dislike towards being in love and settling down, but he always figured a man who loved and valued his family as much as Calum did would want to find someone to love and start a family with.
Calum shook his head. “Of course I believe in love, but why would I want to be in it? All it does is build up your hopes before knocking them down. I don’t need to fall in love with some girl just to have her break my heart.” He sighed, checking the pockets of his leather jacket. “Fuck, where is my lighter?”
“So you’re never plan on getting married?” Ashton tilted his head to the side as he asked his question.
“No, Ash. I’m never getting married.” He said, shrugging like it was no big deal. “Besides, I’m happy how I live; casual lays here and there without the actual drama of a relationship? That sounds a-okay to me.”
Everyone in the group was silent after Calum had gotten off his soap box. However, the silence was short lived as Michael spoke. “You’re fucking depressing, man.” The guitarist shook his head in mock disappointment, but wore a smirk in an attempt to lighten the mood.
Calum laughed, his chuckle and smile contagious. “Whatever, mate. I'm gonna go see if I left my lighter inside.” He announced before turning back towards the entrance of the bar. He put the cigarette that was in between his plump lips behind his ear before pulling the door open, surprised when another smaller body collided into him. His arms wrapped around the figure as he fell backwards, his body hitting the hard pavement underneath him.
Emitting out a pained groan, he opened his eyes, realizing that they’d closed during the fall to the ground. He was met with a pair of beautiful, worried eyes, a color that had his stomach jumping and his heart beating rapidly in his chest. The girl’s lips were parted as she registered what happened. The girl who’d fallen on top of him winced, immediately muttering apologies.
“Fuck, I am so so sorry.” She said quickly, her hands on his chest as pushed herself up, her knees on either side of his body. “I went to push open the door, but it opened before I could reach out and I lost my balance because I’m wearing these ridiculous heels. Then you were there and I was suddenly falling forward and now I’m straddling you in the middle of the sidewalk.” The beautiful stranger rambled on before finally stopping, seemingly nervous about the whole situation.
“It’s all good. I mean, it’s a pretty great view from down here, anyway.” He said with a soft smile as the girl laughed, his cheeks flushing at his flirtatious words.
“Yeah, it’s not so bad from up here, either.” She flirted back, pulling her bottom lip between her teeth as she shamelessly raked her eyes over the person she was on top of. Sparks ignited in Calum as he watched all of her nervousness fade away while examining him. “Here.” She mumbled, moving off of him and standing up as she offered her hand in assistance to help him off the ground.
Calum wiped the dirt off his dark pants and smiled down at the girl who was slowly talking his interest. His tongue swiped over his lip before saying, “Thanks.”
She only nodded in return. “Once again, I’m so so sorry. Is there anything I can do?” She asked, her eyebrows scrunched up in worry.
“Uh, actually there is. You wouldn’t happen to have a lighter, would you?”
The girl nodded, pulling a lighter from the small purse that was on her shoulder. She flicked it on as he pulled the cigarette from earlier from behind his ear and placed in on his lips. She brought the flame up to the tip of Calum’s cigarette and lighting it up and watching it turn a low orange color before fading into the burnt ashes.
He inhaled the dangerous smoke, turning his face to blow it out. He nodded, thanking her before taking another drag and flicking off the ashes. “I’m Calum, Calum Hood.” He offered her his hand, loving her soft touch as she slipped her small hand into his and shook it.
“I’m Y/N Y/L/N.” She smiled up at him brightly, her eyes soft as she looked at him. Y/N couldn’t help but think how attractive the tall man in front of her was. Everything about him took away her breath; from the thick accent he had, to the way he spoke to her so kindly. His eyes, in the white light of the lamppost on the dark street, were a warm brown that made her head spin. His hair was parted and gelled, clearly styled for the night he’d spent out. His swollen lips pulled into an easy-going smirk as he smoked his cigarette.
The collar of his shirt was pulled down in a way that it exposed the two tattoos on both sides of his collarbone. His long fingers were adorned with rings, quietly accenting the three-lettered tattoos on the space between his thumbs and index fingers on both of his hands. Y/N cleared her throat and shook her head, snapping out of the daze the beautiful man had her under. “Well, it was nice meeting you, Calum, but I should probably get going. And again, my apologies.”
Y/N turned and began walking away, arms crossed over her chest, but was stopped as Calum called out her name. “Hey, I know it’s late, but there’s actually something else you could do for me.” He said, taking a few steps in her direction as she did the same.
“And what would that be?” Y/N asked, tilting her head to the side as she rolled her lips between her teeth, trying to control the smile she was threatening to let show.
Calum flicked off the ashes of his cigarette as he nodded his head  towards the restaurant down the street from the bar. “Would you maybe want to go get something to eat? It’s supposed to be really good.”
Y/N couldn’t help but giggle at the turn her night had taken. “What if it’s really bad?��� She asked.
“Then we don’t ever go back.” Calum chuckled.
“Okay, yeah, let’s go.” She accepted his invitation and waited for Calum to begin walking alongside her before they made their way down the block to the restaurant. Calum looked over at Y/N, grinning as she began asking exactly what this place he was taking her to had to offer. He completely forgot about the group of friends that he’d left behind outside the bar. They’d all seen the whole thing; from her falling on top of him, to him asking her out to eat at two in the morning.
Ashton shook his head, laughing as Calum walked away with his new acquaintance. It wasn’t hard to see that Calum had quickly taken a liking to the girl he’d just met. Deep down, he knew that everything his best friend had said about not falling in love was out the window with this new girl. “‘Love’s a scam’ my ass.”
Before he knew it, Calum had been dating Y/N for a year, then two, and then suddenly they’d been together for three years. Looking back at the night they met, Calum realized what a fool he was to believe he would never fall in love because everytime he looked at Y/N or listened to her laugh or saw her smile or felt her gentle touch, he knew he in just a bit deeper when it came to her.
And after three years of falling more and more in love with her everyday, Calum found himself laying in bed on a Saturday morning, Y/N straddling his hips just like she did the night they met with one of his button downs draped over he body, the first few buttons undone and showing the lovebites he’d left on her chest the night before.
Her fingers were playing with the silver necklace that was resting upon his bare chest while his thumbs were stroking over the hem of her underwear on her hip as she tried getting him out of bed so they could do something for one of the few days that Calum had off from his being in the studio. He watched her as she spoke, loving how simple and loving their interactions were. He never wanted this to end. He wanted his mornings to be like this for the rest of his life and that’s when he blurted out the words he’d been planning on asking her for the past year.
“Marry me.”
Y/N immediately stopped talking, her fingers stopping their actions as she processed his two words. She grinned and leaned forward, Calum’s arms wrapping loosely around her body. Her hands came to cup his cheeks before going to the back of his head and tangling her digits in the messy curls of his. “Okay.” She whispered, her nose bumping into his as she attached her lips to his in a searing kiss.
Everything seemed to move so fast after that and the next thing he knew, he was on an airplane with a black wedding band wrapped around his left ring finger, flying back to Los Angeles after spending their three week honeymoon in Bali. Their fingers were laced together and their hearts were intertwined with love as they sat next to each other in their seats.
Calum’s small smile was permanent on his face as Y/N played with his digits, grazing her fingertips softly over his tan skin. She brought his large left hand up to her mouth, placing a kiss over the ring that held more meaning to him than his other ones. He hummed happily, leaning over and nuzzling his nose against hers when she looked over at him before pressing his lips to hers gently, gasping when she kissed him back.
“I love you, Hood.” Calum whispered in the small space between them. Ever since they got married, he couldn’t help but use their now shared last name as a term of endearment. There was something about her being apart of his family and sharing his last name that he loved so much.
“I love you, too, Hood.”
The plane ride back home was calming and full of soft touches, loving glances, and sweet everythings whispered against the shell of one another’s ear. Everything was perfect between them, at least until the baby behind them started crying at the top of its lungs.
Calum understood that babies cry and that sometimes they just need to cry it out. He understood that sometimes there’s not much you can do to get them to be quiet and that’s it even more difficult for the parent to deal with, but he was still very much annoyed that the baby had been crying for at least an hour straight. He felt his temples begin to throb as a headache rocked through his head. He closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the headrest, his irritation rising slowly.
Y/N put her hand on the inside of his thigh, rubbing his leg as to help him calm down. She leaned her head on his shoulder after placing a kiss on the clothed skin. His hand went over hers on his thigh, slotting his fingers perfectly between hers. He was thankful that she knew him inside and out; thankful that she could comfort with something as simple as placing her hand on his leg as a means for comfort.
“We’re never having kids.” He said to her in a quiet mumble, his voice twisting a bit with that Australian accent of his.
Y/N nodded against him. “Right there with ya, babe.”
A few months later, Y/N was driving all the way to the recording studio from their apartment with a couple positive pregnancy tests in her hand. Her excitement was at an all time high as she burst through the doors of the building and found her way into the room that Calum was in with the rest of the boys.
He sat on the couch, listening intently to what Luke was saying while he subconsciously messed with his wedding ring, twirling it around his finger. His left leg was stretched out, right ankle resting on his left knee as he shook his head with a laugh at whatever his tall friend had said.
Calum’s head snapped towards the sudden intrusion of the door opening, pleased to see the one he loved most in the doorway. “Hey, babe-” He stood to greet his wife with a kiss, but it was like a rush of deja vu flashed in his head as she crashed into his body, pushing him back down onto the couch and straddling his lap with the largest smile on her face.
“Woah, baby. What’s going on?” He asked, furrowing his thick eyebrows, his large hands gripping her hips. She held the pregnancy tests she’d taken that day, presenting them in front of Calum. He took them from her and examined their results, seeing the small plus signs and two lines that told him that he and his wife were expecting. His jaw slowly dropped and his heart began to beat rapidly against his ribcage. His brown eyes moved from the sticks in his hands up to the eyes that were already looking down at him, gauging for his reaction to the news.
“You’re… Are you… Are we… Am I?” He couldn’t find the words as he was so overwhelmed with emotion, he didn’t know how to speak anymore.
“I’m pregnant, Cal.” Y/N said breathlessly, the grin still on her face. She watched as his lips slowly turned up into that smile of his that she loved so much. She could tell how happy he was as the crinkles at the corners of his eyes were visible and he began laughing as a surge of happiness washed over him like it never had before.
“I’m gonna be a father.” Calum said quietly, more to himself than to her. “Baby, I'm gonna be a daddy.” His arms circled around her waist as he stood up, picking her up and spinning her around in a circle. He set her back on the floor, cupping her cheeks, her hands holding his wrists as he dipped his head down, kissing all over her face. His lips moved from her forehead to her temples, to her eyes, to her nose, to her cheeks before settling on her lips and pulling away with a loud, “Mwah!” that made her laugh.
Y/N’s hands went to his waist, smoothing up his sides to spread across his back as she embraced her husband in a hug, holding him tight as his arms wrapped around her shoulders, his lips on the crown of her head. “I’m so happy, baby. So happy.”
His wife raised a brow as she pulled away. “What happened to us never having kids?” She teased with a smirk.
“Who cares? We’re having a baby, Y/N.” He said to her, one of his hands moving between them to rest over her stomach. “We’re gonna be parents!”
Y/N felt tears well up in her eyes as she looked down at his large hand cupping her stomach, his thumb rubbing over her clothed tummy. “I love you, Calum.” She uttered when she looked back up at him and saw the softest look painted on his face. The way he looked at her with such care and devotion had her heart melting in her chest.
“I love you, too, darlin’.” Calum wiped away the tears that had fallen down her cheeks.
“Aw, I love you guys!” Michael interrupted the moment with his exclamation from where he was sitting, having heard and seen the whole exchange and announcement. He stood up and wrapped his arms around the married couple, squeezing them tight in a hug. Both Calum and Y/N laughed at the sudden intrusion, but couldn’t even find it in themselves to be mad at him for interrupting.
“We’re gonna be uncles?” Ashton said from inside the booth as he watched the scene unfold through the glass that separated them.
Luke popped out of his seat, throwing his long arms around the group of three that was already hugging. Y/N and Calum were squished between Michael and Luke, and before they knew it, Ashton had made his way into the group hug, squeezing the couple even more.
“Okay, everyone,” Calum started, clearing his throat to make his voice louder. “Back off. I don’t need you squishing my wife and child.” He said, unwrapping his arms from around his wife and pulling away from their embrace, causing the boys to break away from Calum and Y/N.
Y/N let out a long exhale as she gathered herself and looked up at the living daydream that was Calum Hood. He was already looking down at her as his arm wound around her shoulder and pulled her into his side. She placed her hand on his sternum, the 1 of his New York Jets jersey underneath her palm. He hummed contentedly and brought his lips down to hers, pecking softly at her cupid’s bow.
“We’re having a baby.” He muttered against his wife’s mouth. He suddenly felt that the next nine months couldn’t come faster.
With every month that passed, Calum watched Y/N’s body grow and couldn’t help but think she was the most beautiful she’d ever been. He loved coming home at night, laying in bed next to her, bringing his head near her swollen belly as she watched tv with Duke in her lap, while he began talking or singing to his daughter. He loved getting in the bath with Y/N, her back pressed against his chest while his fingers traced circles over her tummy that was poking out of the water. He loved dancing with her in the living room of their apartment, laughing together and simply enjoying each other’s presence.
When they picked their daughter’s name, Y/N was standing out on the balcony in the early morning, having been unable to sleep the night before due to being so uncomfortable in the last few weeks of her pregnancy. Calum woke up after going to pull Y/N into him and realizing she wasn’t there. He looked over and saw that she was leaning against the doorframe of the balcony with her hand on her belly.
He walked over to her, putting his hand on her back, leaning down to kiss the corner of her eye as she leaned into the little display of affection. “Why’re you up so early, my love?” He asked, his voice raspy and sleepy.
“She was moving around a lot.” Y/N shrugged. She looked from the early morning sky, filled with soft oranges and a hint of pink as the sun rose and the light hit the clouds, to Calum. “Beginning’ to think she got your soccer skills, Cal.” She giggled quietly.
Calum grinned and put his hand on her tummy, bending down to place a loving kiss on her stomach. “That’s my girl.” Y/N’s hand went to the back of Calum’s head, combing out his curls before he stood back up and pulled her to his bare chest, his arms snaking around her torso to rest his large hands over her stomach. They both looked out at the morning sky, listening to the sounds of the city as people began waking up and getting on with their day.
“Cal, do you know how to say morning sky in Maori?” She asked, turning her to head to look up at her husband.
His eyebrows furrowed as he tried to think of the translation. “I think it’s atarangi. Why?”
“I think we should name her Atarangi Koa Hood. What do you think?”
Calum’s face broke into a smile and he nodded, nuzzling his face in Y/N’s hair and giving her a kiss behind her ear. “I think it’s beautiful, just like her mum.” He mumbled his words against her hair. Y/N sighed happily, putting her hands over Calum’s and lacing their fingers on top of her large belly.
Before he knew it, him and Y/N were in the delivery room at three on a Tuesday morning. Y/N’s hand was laced with Calum’s, sweat beading her forehead and shining on her chest as the doctor urged her to keep pushing. Calum leaned his head against the side of hers, his lips grazing over the shell of her ear as he whispered encouragements to her.
Her eyes were squeezed shut as Calum placed a soft kiss on her forehead, telling her to take deep breaths. “Come on, baby. You can do this, I know you can.” He told her. She grunted as she finished the push, her breath shallow as she opened her eyes, head falling back against the pillow.
“I can’t, Cal. I can’t do this.” She shook her head, tears in her eyes as she looked up at her husband. “Can you do it for me?”
Calum chuckled and rubbed his hand over her back. “I wish I could, but you have to do it because you’re stronger than I am. Come on, just a few more pushes baby, you can do it.”
Y/N nodded, taking a deep breath and clearing her throat. “You’re right, I can do it.” She sat up a bit straighter, tightening her grip on Calum’s hand. He braced himself for the pain of her squeezing his hand as he continued rubbing his thumb over the nape of her neck. She closed her eyes and started pushing again, her face red turning red as she put so much effort into her pushes.
Looking down, Calum watched as the baby’s head started crowning. He was grossed out, but was also in awe of what Y/N was doing. “I can see the top of her head, darlin’. Keep pushing!”
Soon, Y/N had slowed down her pushes and within minutes, the baby had been born and the first cry was heard as the doctor held her. Calum and Y/N, still holding each other’s hands, heads leaning against one another, smiled brightly as they caught sight of their new daughter. She cried, her eyes closed, arms and legs fidgeting as the new, cold air washed over her skin.
A nurse approached with a blanket and came to stand next to Y/N, placing it on her chest as the doctor put the baby on the blanket. Y/N gasped, looking down at the baby that was still crying. “Oh my god. Hi, sweet girl, hi!” She cried as her hands came to rest softly across her daughter’s  chest. Calum got closer to Y/N, his pointer finger grazing over the baby’s small foot, playing with her tiny toes.
For the second time in his life, Calum Hood fell in love when he looked at this darling little girl laying on Y/N’s chest. The baby turned her head towards Calum, her eyes opening just a bit in Calum’s direction. His heart stopped beating the second she looked his way and he almost dropped to his knees when he looked into the beautiful brown eyes his daughter had.
“Do you want to cut the umbilical cord, Dad?” The doctor asked with a smile. Calum nodded and grabbed the pair of medical scissors he was handed from one of the nurses, being careful to not harm his daughter as he cut the pale colored cord that kept her attached to Y/N.
“She looks so much like you, Cal. Look at her hair!” Y/N said, running her fingers through the wispy curls on the infant’s head. She turned her head to look at him, her nose bumping against his as they looked into each other’s eyes.
“I love you both so much.” He whispered to her, tears glossing over his eyes. “I’ve never been so happy, Y/N.” He smiled, kissing Y/N softly, humming as nothing but love pumped through his heart and into his veins.
In that moment, Calum forgot all about never wanting to be married or never wanting to have kids. He’d never wanted something so much now that he had it.
As it has seemed to do in the year and a half since Calum became a father, time flew by, and now he was running around the apartment, chasing Atarangi around the small space. Now that she was walking and running around everywhere, he found it hard to keep up with her. He’d turn his back on her for a minute and when turned back, she would be gone.
This was one of those moments. Calum had set her down on his and Y/N’s bed after having given her a bath. She was all wrapped up in a blue towel and babbling away, occasionally saying, “Love you, Daddy.” Calum smiled to himself at the words she kept repeating as he grabbed some of her clean clothes.
He suddenly realized that it was quiet, too quiet. He turned around to see that Atarangi was gone and nothing but the blue towel was left in her place.
With a groan, Calum dashed into the bathroom to see if she was in there; nope. He went to her room and once again she was nowhere to be found. He checked the kitchen and the dining room having no luck. He came to the living room and saw his daughter running up to her mother and tapping at her leg.
Y/N threw her hands over her mouth to contain her laugh when she saw her very naked little girl looking up at her. “Oh, sweetheart! Where are your clothes?” She questioned, bending down to lift Atarangi into her arms.
The toddler began playing with the necklace around her mother’s neck, giving Y/N the most Calum smile she’d ever seen. Her curly hair was damp and her brown eyes filled with innocence. “Love you, mama!” She exclaimed, clapping her hands together.
“I love you, Ata!” Y/N said, gently pressing her finger against Atarangi’s chest. “Give me a kiss!” She puckered her lips and giggled when the tiny child gave her a slobbery, puckered kiss.
Y/N began walking to the bedroom to find Calum, but stopped when she noticed him in the doorway with a content look on his face. “Look who I found, Cal.” She smiled and handed the girl in her arms to her husband.
“I’m sorry, baby.” He said, his hands wrapping around Atarangi’s body and pulling her to his chest. “I was getting her clothes while she sat on the bed, and when I turned around, she was gone.”
“It’s okay. I know that she doesn’t know how to stay still.” Y/N shrugged, grinning at her baby girl as she tickled her stomach and listened to the sweet giggles. Calum chuckled and kissed Atarangi’s head. “But hey, at least we’re not in some big suburban house that she could get lost in.”
Calum nodded, agreeing with his wife. “We’re never moving to the suburbs.” He sighed, looking at Atarangi who was playing with Calum’s necklace.
Y/N laughed, knowing that what her husband said wasn’t likely to remain true. “Uh, huh. Okay, baby.” Y/N said sarcastically before she gave Calum a quick peck on the chin before going to the kitchen to start dinner.
He sighed and looked back down at Atarangi. “Hi, daddy.” She smiled, patting her hand on his cheek.
“Hi, baby.” He shook his head with a laugh before walking back to the bedroom to dress the naked little girl in his arms.
Once again, another one of Calum’s nevers became a reality and and a year later, he was living in a big house in Beverly Hills. As Atarangi grew and got older, he realized that she needed more space and that she needed a yard to play in. For that reason, Calum decided that it was time he and Y/N started looking for a house that they could call a forever home and watch their daughter grow up in.
It wasn’t hard to find a house that accommodated the three of them and Duke. Soon, they were moved into a nice house that both Calum and Y/N had fallen in love with as soon as they stepped past the threshold.
Now, Calum was coming down the stairs and into the living room when he caught sight of something in the corner of his eyes. Backing up, he looked at the wall in the hallway that led to where the couch and tv were at, and saw a rainbow of marker and crayon scribbles and drawings on the white wall.
“Are you kidding me? Again?” He groaned and ran his fingers over the drawings, looking at the floor to see an array of coloring materials that Uncle Ashton had gotten his niece for her birthday. He closed his eyes rubbing his hand over his face and through his curly hair in frustration.
Sighing, Calum stalked into the kitchen and opened the cleaning supplies cabinet under the sink, grabbing the magic erasers they had on deck for something like this. He turned on the water, wetting it before squeezing it of excess water.
Calum walked back into the hallway, getting on his knees as he closed all the markers with their proper lids. He began scrubbing away the artwork that stretched from one side of the hallway, all the way down to the other side.
Footsteps came running down the hardwood stairs and he looked to the left to see Y/N with the box of art supplies the markers were supposed to be in. She winced when she saw Calum, realizing he was cleaning their daughter’s mess.
“I had a feeling that she got into these without asking.”
“What can I say? Our daughter’s a real Picasso.” He shrugged with an unangered smile before going back to cleaning off the wall. Y/N came over next to him, picking up the markers and crayons that were on the floor, putting them back in the box.
“I mean, at least she drew her family.” Y/N said looking at the drawings. On the white surface of the wall, there were drawings of Calum, Y/N, Atarangi, and Duke along with Ashton, Luke, Michael, and their respective families.
“Yep, look there’s my mum, dad, and Mali.” He pointed out his family and then Y/N’s own parents and siblings.
“Atarangi is too cute. She’s always drawing her family. It’s sweet.”
Calum nodded. “It really is, but I’m getting tired of cleaning up all these drawings.” He chuckled, still scrubbing at the wall, the colors of the art on the walls fading slowly. “We’re not having anymore kids.”
Y/N stood back up and laughed at the irony of Calum’s words. “I’m pregnant.” She announced to him, watching as he looked back at her with a bit of a surprised yet unsurprised smile on his face. He laughed as he stood up, leaving the cleaning sponge on the ground before wrapping Y/N up in a tight hug and giving her a series of kisses on the lips.
He put his hands on her shoulders, rubbing his thumbs over her collarbone. “You have a habit of making my nevers a reality, you know that?” He told her.
“Oh, you love it!” She giggled, wrapping her arms around his torso, kissing his shirt clad chest before nuzzling her face into him.
“You're not wrong, my love.” He smiled softly, holding Y/N tighter to his body and closing his eyes contentedly.
Soon, for the last time, Calum saw himself with another thing he had once said never to.
Calum was sat on the couch with a five year old Atarangi on his left side, cuddled into his body with her arm wrapped around his torso as she slept soundfully. Duke laid over her small feet, eyes closed, sleeping peacefully with the occasional doggy snore. Y/N was on the other side of him, holding their two year old son, Kace, his hands pressed against her warm chest and he slept on top of them.
He looked away from the Disney movie on the tv that Atarangi had chosen for the night and down to her as she made a little hum. He smiled, a burst of adoration in his chest while he watched as she cuddled into him a bit more. His hand smoothed her curly hair down, pulling some of it behind her ear as he played with it.
He felt Y/N move around a bit by his side, burying her own face in Calum’s broad shoulder. Looking from his daughter, his eyes fell on his wife and son. Y/N opened her eyes, looking up at him, sleep swirling in her beautiful eyes.
“Is she sleeping?” Y/N whispered as to not wake up their sleeping children. Calum answered with a nod. “Should we take them up to bed?” She looked down at Kace, kissing his forehead and rubbing her hands over his back.
“If you’re not too tired, can we finish the movie first?” Calum asked, grabbing Kace’s foot and tickling at his small toes, chuckling softly as the sleeping baby kicked his hand away.
“Of course, baby.” She nodded, laying her head back down on his shoulder. Calum pressed his lips to her hairline, mumbling a quick ‘I love you.’
The movie finished playing and he was pleased with the ending as the credits began rolling. Looking around the room, he took in the mess of the living room. There were coloring books and crayons on the ground, both Atarangi and Kace’s toys spread out haphazardously on the carpet.
The coffee table that he was resting his feet on had a large bowl of mostly finished popcorn on it, drinks and Kace’s sippy cup placed on coasters to avoid water rings on the wooden surface. With a sigh, he made a mental reminder to get it cleaned up after putting the kids to bed.
Calum put his hand on Y/N’s thigh, making a move to get up before he realized his wife had also fallen asleep. He sat back again and took in the sight of his sleeping family, taking a mental picture that he hoped would last forever. The smile that broke onto his face was one of adoration.
Everything in that quiet moment was so perfect. Everything he never knew he wanted was bundled up against him on the couch.
As he looked around at the three most important people (and dog) in his life, he hoped that this wouldn’t ever fade away. He didn’t know that something or someone could mean so much and looking at the family he and Y/N had built together, he learned what that meant.
However, there was one never that Calum knew would never become a reality, and with a soft, pleased look stretching over his lips, he uttered it in the quietest whisper, almost sounding like a prayer to whatever was listening.
“I’m never letting go.”
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hanhan156 · 4 years
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Epilogue: Insomnia
I wasn’t really inspired by continuing Halloween fics (tbh, I think I’m not gonna finish those all by October because I’d prefer to make something I like to publishing something shitty everyday) today, so instead, I finished the next Stadium fic which has been in progress for way too long.
It’s an epilogue for the last chapter, and this time, from Richard’s POV with a nice flashback scene included. ^^
Epilogue: Insomnia
The petite figure was merging with the dark night and even though he tried his best, Richard couldn’t take his eyes off from the gorgeous silhouette - the one which had become so familiar over 25 years of knowing each other. After today’s unpredictable incidents though, Richard felt like he was looking at his old friend with brand new eyes - with a kind of vague yearning both in his heart and in his soul. The emotion made familiar lyrics to loop in his head:
Sehnsucht versteckt,
sich wie ein Insekt.
Im Schlafe merkst du nicht,
dass es dich sticht.
It was like an insect indeed - like an annoying, itching feeling inside he couldn’t shake off.
Sehsucht ist so grausam.
Richard could only wonder what was Paul now thinking of him - had he gone too far? He hoped they could talk all of this over as soon as possible. Sooner or later, he was sure that the uncertainty would make him crazy if he wouldn’t do anything about it.
Awoken from his thoughts by Paul’s waving and then making his way to the backyard, Richard knew he had to leave as well. It was indeed a bit weird to stalk his bandmate from the car at midnight, even though how pleasant it had been. For a second, Richard had considered that should he follow Paul and ask still the one last time what was going on. His friend hadn’t been behaving like himself at all even though he had been assuring that everything was fine. These moments, Richard hoped to have the superpower to read minds. It would have made the situation way less complicated and wouldn’t have left him with all the questions.  
The journey back home went on automation - even if there would have been police on the road, Richard wouldn’t have noticed anything. So many thoughts and concerns were revolving around his head that it was difficult to focus on anything that was going on outside.
Richard collapsed on the sofa with a huge sigh when he had finally reached his destination. His eyes were heavy as lead, but he couldn’t fall asleep. Instead, he tried his best to keep himself busy by putting the tv on maximum volume and lighting up probably the millionth cigarette today. Luckily, there was nobody complaining about smoking inside now.
A lady on the tv’s reality show was weeping when she had been voted out from his team, but Richard didn’t get what was going on in the mindless program even though his eyes were fixed on the screen.
Oh, Paul Landers, you sweet, sweet man, what have you done to me?
He tried to make sense of his feelings: what on earth had actually happened today? Of course, he knew the script very well: they had agreed to make this one little kiss on the stage, meant to be an innocent act. He and Paul were at first pretending it was nothing, no big deal - hell’s, they had performed embarrassing and awkward stuff together several times before. In the end, it had taken forever, and finally, when they’d had the courage to actually make it happen, Paul had fainted. Richard didn’t like that something he’d done had made his friend to feel sick.
Richard had been scared to death - in the worst scenarios in his mind he had thought that Paul wouldn’t have woken up anymore or would have had amnesia. What a nice start for a tour it would have been.
Holy shit.
And even more disturbingly, even though how sorry he was for Paul, he didn’t want to admit how much he had enjoyed the situation. Like a lively gif image, Paul with raised eyebrows, lurking him in, was looping in his already way too messed head. Richard had been sober as a judge the whole day, but still, a dizzy feeling was distracting him constantly - like he’d been drinking nonstop for a week and didn’t really know what was going on anymore. How could he make this to stop? Could he live his normal life, to proceed with their band and their tour, when he was having painfully strong feelings like this?
What if he hates me for the rest of his life because of this? At least he talked with me afterward, but what if he was just pretending, just being polite? Have I ruined everything now?
Nothing made sense anymore.
Despite all of this vague mess, from one thing Richard was completely sure: that thing which was painful to admit, yet so self-evident. It had been clear as a day for a long time, but he had tried to push the feeling away. So far, he had managed pretty well, but something about today had revealed it once again.
Love. The sweetest, yet the most hurtful word known in mankind - and he had been in love for so long now that it almost hurt physically.
The target of his desperate love wasn’t the easiest one indeed: his long-time friend, colleague and almost like a brother, their relationship slowly, but steadily developing and changing. Richard had tried to avoid thinking about it too much - he was totally sure that Paul wasn’t interested in him in that kind of way and their semi-romantic moments had been just playing in his friend’s opinion. Because Richard had always been a person who wasn’t ashamed of physical proximation - Till was still reminding him occasionally from that interview in which he’d hugged the poor girl when she had asked how Germans express their feelings - he had so far managed to use the trait as his excuse when something he’d done had raised questions.
But, of course, he couldn’t keep lying forever - neither to himself nor to others. Richard was totally sure that their bandmates - especially Till, whose eagle eye didn’t seem to miss anything - had started to suspect that there was something going on between the two guitarists.
Richard wrapped himself tightly in a blanket. He wished he would have been a chameleon and could blend into the sofa material - disappear from this planet and from all the conflicting human behavior and feelings.
He closed his eyes and tried - almost forced himself - to think about anything else, but the only thing that came to his mind was Paul.
P-A-U-L
A simple word, with four letters, but yet, the word which was capable of doing nasty things inside him. The word which had been the theme of his way too lively, even sensual, daydreams.
Sigh. Paul was so close to him, yet unreachable.
While being in a dream-like state, random memories and thoughts about his dearest bandmate looping on, the cinema of his mind sent him suddenly back to the early 90’s - back to the very first moment which had led to this eventually. At least it was something else than Paul with a kissing face, thank God.
The slightly moldy scent of their rehearsal room in the basement was still so vivid, even though it was already decades from that fateful night when Paul Landers had stepped into Richard Kruspe’s life.
“You gotta be kidding me,” Richard snorted. “Where on earth is this ‘second guitarist’ of yours you promised? It seems like he’s only in your imagination.”
“He promised to come, so we’ll wait,” Till said, trying to calm their edgy guitarist down.
They had been expecting the possible new player to show up at 6 pm - the clock on the wall showed it was 6:30 already. The lingering was especially difficult for Richard who had already earned his reputation of being an exaggeratedly strict and punctual person. “A perfectionist, straight from the infernal flames of Hell,” like Schneider had described.
“Flake knows the guy from their earlier band, and he assured he’s gonna be trustworthy,” Till said and was about to continue while the keyboardist shouted behind him: “He’s just really bad with schedules. I know him, he’s a gifted musician and a nice person. We should give him a chance. Let’s don’t judge him by this, ok?”
But Richard wasn’t convinced. He was always uncertain about meeting new people - he thought they could be a threat to him. “You really think so?”
“Let’s just be patient. I’m sure he has a good explanation for the delay,” Flake replied. He didn’t want to start an argument now.
“And why do we need a second guitarist anyway?” In Richard’s nightmares, the new guy would take his place and act as a bandleader - or even worse, be more gorgeous than him.
As usually, Schneider started to get annoyed at their guitarist. “You know very well that our riffs are so plain that we need something more. And, it’s always nice to have a new perspective as well. I agree with Till and Flake, we should wait and see who this guy is. If we don’t get along, we can dump him and that’s it. Not necessary to make so much drama out of this.”
The percussionist’s straightforward style of expressing opinions was unbearable for Richard. Till had joked that they often resembled two roosters having a fierce cockfight when they were arguing over which one of them was right.
“…you claim that I’m the one making drama?” the guitarist lashed out and approached Schneider, leering him. Every single time that particular gaze made the drummer uncomfortable. “Last time when I checked, it was this guy, who we don’t even know yet, who hadn’t kept his promise, so piss off for accusing me!”
“W…hat?” Schneider was so shocked about the insult that he froze for a moment.
When he had finally gathered his thoughts and was about to say something against, the guitarist was quicker and announced: “Screw this, I’m gonna have a smoke. Please let me know when this imaginative creature comes. If he doesn’t appear, I’m going home. I have more important things to do than to wait for him ‘til the end of the world.”
At the same time, while Richard was yelling, Schneider’s mom arrived with a bunch of freshly made sandwiches and beercans in her hands. She startled when they almost bumped into each other with the guitarist who was rushing outside.
“Hallo, wie geht es dir?” she asked with a sweet voice when she stood in the middle of their basement, now changed into her son’s and his friends’ rehearsal room.
“Gut, gut…we are Mama quite busy here now…”
Even though they all were adults already, Herr and Frau Schneider wanted to treat their son’s friends as a part of the family. The drummer thought it was embarrassing while the rest accepted offered food and drinks with pleasure - none of them showered in money, so they welcomed all free stuff they could get.
But Richard wasn’t interested in snacks now. He preferred to pout alone, enjoying his smoking moment.
The guitarist had pondered the band’s future quite a lot. Even though it seemed pretty promising, he doubted it now and then. Did this make any sense at all? Everyone around him had all of his life claimed that he should get a degree and get a real job - get a normal, adult life. He should take his head out of the clouds and be responsible. In a weak moment, when nothing had seemed to work out in his life, he’d been convinced that maybe he’d really been wrong. Maybe he should try this “adult life” thing. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad after all. Not his dream, but a way to adapt to society, to make himself accepted - the first time in his life.
But all those doubts had vanished into thin air when he met Till Lindemann - a sensitive poet, who seemed to understand him completely even though they were so different as persons. What had brought them together were the crazy visions, the lust for life: the lust for being an artist and not to give a shit about what the others were thinking.
Richard knew in his heart his real dream: to express himself and to be respected by what he was doing. For Christ’s sake, life was too short not to be lived to the fullest, and music, that was his whole life. It was the torch of creativity he had to feed regularly - otherwise, he would slowly and painfully perish.
He sighed and looked at the sky, trying to blink back tears. The last thing he wanted now was to weep like a baby.
The sensitive thoughts didn’t have a chance to last for long though because they were interrupted by a distant, loud rattle - it sounded like somebody had made an orchestra out of pots and pans. Richard was sure it was the neighbor’s kids goofing around and didn’t mind about it so much at first.
But the noise kept getting closer and closer to the house - seemed like kids couldn’t have been blamed for it anymore.
Richard rubbed his eyes. What in God’s name is it?
The question got its answer in a minute when Richard saw a small cycling figure approaching the house with a huge guitar bag.
The figure - now Richard could see it was a blond man, probably around his age - stopped and so did the cacophony. “Is this…Christoph Schneider’s house?” he asked, still panting from the cycling.
“Yes.”
The incognito man smiled so brightly that it almost seemed like the whole dark street was suddenly lighted up. “Wunderbar! So umm, this band about Stein…something is rehearsing here, am I right?”
“Rammstein, yes.”
“Then I’m in the right place! And I’m terribly sorry I’m late, there was a huge traffic jam and I got stuck. Also, I didn’t realize this place was on the other side of the city.”
Richard didn’t reply anything - he kept staring at the distance, busy with smoking. Seemed like their new guitarist had finally appeared. He wasn’t sure, was he ready for this.
The guy left his wrecked bicycle - Richard could only wonder, what kind of torture the poor vehicle had been going through - in front of the house and with his guitar bag, came back to the other man. “So, we finally meet, I’ve been looking forward to this! Flake has told me so much about the new band project of yours. I’m Paul Landers,” he said and offered his hand.
But Richard acted like he had forgotten completely how human interactions worked. “Let’s go inside,” he answered nonchalantly to the other man’s friendly gesture. Paul almost had to run to keep up with his pace.
Finally, they both were in the basement and when Schneider’s mom saw there was a new guest in their house, she hurried to get a sandwich and a beer for Paul as well.
All of the band - except for Richard, who was still acting grumpy - greeted the new musician and with Flake, they hugged: it was nice to reunite after playing in the same band for so long.
“Okay, so what kind of music do you guys play?” Paul asked while munching his bread.
“It’s a bit difficult to explain. Maybe we’ll just play something and you’ll make your own opinion,” Flake answered.
“Do you want to hear the lyrics first?” Till asked.
“Yeah, sure.”
“Okay, we have one completed song and it’s called Herzeleid.” Till looked at their possible new guitarist’s curious face and continued: “The other guys composed and arranged it and I wrote the text. Let us know what you think of it and please be straightforward, if it’s completely Scheisse.”
He cleared his throat and started to read the text out loud:
“Bewartet einander vor Herzeleid,
denn kurz ist die Zeit die ihr beisammen seid.
Denn wenn euch auch viele Jahre vereinen,
einst werden sie wie Minuten euch scheinen.
Herzeleid
Bewahret einander vor der Zweisamkeit.”
When Till had finished his recitation, nobody said anything for a while. The singer got a bit uneasy. “Yeah, well…I know the lyrics are a bit cheesy, I’m not sure from where they actually came from…” He knew very well that the text told about his own recent painful break-up, but he didn’t want to open up about his love life now.
Paul stood up and gave Till the brightest smile possible. “No need to worry, it was beautiful! Very heartbreaking and melancholic. You truly are a talented writer.”
Till wasn’t sure was the new guy flattering or did he really mean what he said. “Danke…”
“I’m curious to hear the whole song while already the lyrics sound so awesome.”
Richard was in a mood for challenging. “We are here to play so just grab your guitar and start.”
Paul took the last sip from his beer and said: “Yeah, sure, but can I get the chords or some kind of instructions? And is there a second amplifier somewhere? I couldn’t take mine on my bike.”
He expected to get at least some guidance, but to his surprise, there was none - Richard just started playing the heavy riff without even bothering to look at their new possible bandmember.
Okay, did I say something wrong, or is this how this band usually works? Well, if I want to be in, I just have to adapt, Paul thought, and with Flake’s help, got another, smaller amplifier. He tried his best to mimic the chords by ear and occasionally trying to stalk the lead guitarist - it was quite impossible though when he seemed to have turned his back from Paul on purpose.
Even though with all his best effort, Paul could hear he sounded like absolute bullshit. His precious instrument had turned into a torture machine - he could have never imagined he could create discords so horrible.
When the song ended he didn’t dare to look at anyone - maybe they had supposed that he would have had a perfect pitch and were now disappointed. He’d made them wait and it had ended up being a failure.
Scheisse.
Paul thought that maybe it would be best if he’d pack his things up and leave without saying anything. The cocky guitarist of this band seemed like he knew what he was doing so why he should be bothered any longer.
Till came next to the new player when he saw that he was visibly disappointed. “Es tut mir leid, Reesh isn’t the easiest person to deal with, he takes this band death seriously. It’s nothing personal against you,” the singer whispered so quietly that Richard couldn’t hear.
But Paul wasn’t convinced of the soothing words and continued with his packing. “C’mon, you have to admit that I sounded like shit.” He stopped for a while and nodded towards the lead guitarist. “I can see from his face that he’s unsatisfied. He probably hates me already. Maybe it’s better that I leave and you continue while you still have a good start here.”
Till tried his best to be supportive and explained: “None of us is a professional musician, so no worries. You at least tried your best. The only problem was that our little diva didn’t bother to tell you that the song is in drop D tuning. Let’s try again.” He squeezed the new player’s shoulder gently like begging him to stay with them.
Paul sighed. “Okay, one more time then.” Even though he was disappointed to himself he had an instinct that he should give it a try.
He grabbed his guitar back from the floor. “Let’s play.”
He didn’t know at that moment that the decision changed the band’s path completely.
After the surprisingly successful band practice, everybody had left except for the two guitarists who were having the last smokes before heading home.
“I really like what you have here. It seems promising and I’m more than happy to be a part of it. I can only imagine what we will achieve together.” He didn’t think that the band would get very popular - it was technically impossible to be world-famous with dark German lyrics and simple, aggressive riffs. At least he hoped they could record some albums and have small tours around Germany. To have fun and create art with a bunch of guys who seemed quite nice already.
To his utter surprise, the other man said unexpectedly: “I have to admit that you weren’t so bad at all in the end.”
“R-really?” Paul didn’t know his fellow guitarist so well yet, but he seemed very picky. Even this small kind of compliment must have been a huge thing from him.
Richard nodded. “After you figured the song out, you played just fine. I’m looking forward to what we can achieve together as well.” He turned and the first time that night looked at Paul straight in the eyes. “You passed the test. Welcome to the band.”
The target of the small compliment tried to act as casual as he could even though his heart started pounding disturbingly rapidly. He didn’t have any clue what this “test” he had just passed was, but it sounded nice to hear he had succeeded.
Paul cleared his throat and said: “One thing bothers me still though.” He came a bit closer and continued: “We didn’t say hi properly and actually, I haven’t even heard your whole name yet.”
Richard stared at the offered hand for a while, but finally - to Paul’s surprise and relief - he took it. “Richard.”
Paul couldn’t hide his smirking - the other man had announced his name so comically officially like he would have been the most important person walking on this earth. “Richard, who exactly?”
“C’mon, do you now want my social security number as well or what? Very well then, it’s 705…”
“What on earth you think I’d do with your social security number?” Paul interrupted even though he had to admit that he liked the new acquaintance's sarcastic sense of humor already. “Just that it would be nice to know the full name of the guy, whose band I’m apparently in now.”
Richard straightened his back and with another firm handshake, announced: “Richard Zven Kruspe, nice to meet you.”
“Paul Heiko Landers, pleased to meet you too.”
Richard knew from that moment he would never forget the name - the bond had been formed for eternity on that fateful night.
He sighed. Till death do us part, mein Paulchen.
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whencallstheheart · 5 years
Text
What do you hope to see happen next season?
See all the responses below the cut.
Jack alive
Lots of Henry stuff, more Fiona, better stuff for Bill, Rosie and Lee adopt!
Consistency in the show plot carrying from the end of season 6 through the whole of season 7.
Elizabeth finds love again
I would like to see Henry and Elizabeth’s friendship continue to develop- not romantically so, but as friends that can counsel and help each other. I’d like to see another man come to town to really capture Elizabeth’s heart. Neither Lucas or Nathan seem to be sweeping her off her feet like Jack did. Would like to see that for her again.
Lori returns
Henry continuing a path towards redemption. Him and Elizabeth having contact with Abigail through writing or phone. Lee and Rosemary scenes. Allie scenes.
Lee + Rosie have kids.
Better storyline’s for Henry and more Fiona!
I hope Elizabeth stays strong and  Starts a relationship  With Lucas later in the season. Rosemary has a baby. Carson and Faith's relationship grows and Nathan and Fiona start dating
Love for henry, Elizabeth chooses lucas
More transition to modernity and how they deal with it.
I truly hope Lucas and Elizabeth end up together. Nathan's a fine guy it's just I don't want to watch  Her fall in love with another Mountie. You can't replace Jack and I think it would be disrespectful to try. I hope lee and rosemary adopt a chikd. Carson and faith get engaged, love for Henry, more cute scenes with baby Jack, Jessie and Clara's wedding  and love for Bill . He needs someone special . Fiona date Nathan
more character development for the new characters. letters from abigail. it sucks that they also got rid of cody.
More community scenes.
L&R to adopt a sibling group instead of just a baby, C&J to get married, and Lucas to start dating Fiona.
Henry finds love. Lee and Rosemary become parents. And I hope the triangle with Elizabeth isn't too OTT ridiculous.
Elizabeth picking Nathan, Abigail recast and I wouldn’t mind seeing more of Elizabeth’s high end society life. The costumes for those scenes are amazing.
Henry’s redemption.
Lee and Rosemary adopting. Love for Henry. Elizabeth and Lucas. Morr back story on Lucas. More Elizabeth with the baby and Elizabeth being independent
Really want to see L&R start a family. Even better if they adopt and end up having a surprise baby at the same time. Rosemary having to handle two kids would be both entertaining and heartwarming. She'll be a wonderful mother.
Less romance for Elizabeth and more of her with Baby Jack. More Lee and Bill interacting and more Rosemary!! Also maybe a pregnancy for Clara
More in depth stuff with the characters we love. Lee & Rosemary adopting a child.
Lee and Rosemary adopt a child.
Rosemary and lee adopt, Jesse and Clara get married.
More Lee rosemary storylines
Jesse clara get married
Faith carson go away
Better plot lines less fluff
Lee & Rosemary adopting a child. Anything involving Henry. A visit from cody.
Better plot lines for Elizabeth/ more stuff about Lucas and Fiona, a wedding for Clara and Jessie, more Henry!!
À New love for Elisabeth
Lee/rosemary with a kid. Jack’s family visiting. Elizabeth dating.
I would like to see a recast Abigail, hopefully somebody that has chemistry with Henry.
Elizabeth & Lucas slowly exploring  potential romance.
Fiona lighting a fire under Nathan’s butt.
Lee & Rosemary adopting.
more drama, but not relationship drama
all
Better storylines for Elizabeth she's so boring
Lee and rosemary getting a kid
A wedding for Clara & Jesse!
See Lee/Rosemary have a kid, see more Henry, more development b/w Carson and Faith
Rosemary and Lee adopting Spencer, or any child.
LESS ALLIE. I can't stand that annoying child.
Elizabeth and Carson
Less drama
a good show
Elizabeth picking Nathan, but going very slow. Julie is added as a permanent part of the cast. Oh the adventures they will have. Rosemary and Lee adopting and by the Season Finale, OPPS. She's pregnant. Jesse and Clara marry. Faith and Carson get engaged. Fiona and Kevil start courting. Ned and Florence start courting. Lucas and Henry still have tricks up their sleeves. Henry finds love with a newcomer. Molly has a new role. Allie is Class President.
More Elizabeth and Nathan scenes.
Rosemary and Lee with a baby. Henry gets a second shot as mayor.
I would like to see a love interest for Henry and for Lee and Rosemary to have a child some way. I would also like to see Elizabeth with another love interest.
Bill leaving
I want to see Lee and rosemary adopt one, if not more, children. I love the couple and would love to see their dynamic as parents.
Rosemary and Lee to have a baby
Jesse & Clara wedding, Elizabeth & Nathan pair up, Henry is vindicated more, I’ll goes off somewhere else to be a judge
More Lucas. Even more Jesse and Clara. Lucas and the baby. More Fiona.
Other romance for people in the town besides Elizabeth. Fiona and Lucas maybe and a romance for Henry. Also would love for a sickness to hit the town so Carson could use his skills more. Nobody ever gets sick..pretty uncommon for this time period.
Cody
Elizabeth and Nathen get closer. Maybe a date or 2. He hears he might be transferred again. He leaves the Mounties for town sheriff, which is open since bill is a judge now. Nathen says he quit for Allie, we all know it’s for Elizabeth
Elizabeth teaching and finding her own way.
Elizabeth possibly finds love. Fiona too.
Elizabeth and Lucas begin a courtship
Lee & Rosemary become parents.
More real life scenarios and  continued focus on all characters not just a few.
1) Elizabeth not repeating old dynamics with a new love (that I fear will be Nathan).
2) More Coulter's moments. :)
addopting a child
Elizabeth falling in love with Lucas
More screen time for Lee & Rosemary, and maybe an emphasis on Clara & Jesse.
I’d like to see more unconventional friendships and relationships developing. I also hope they focus on the characters already on the show and don’t add too many new characters and plots.
na
More about The relationiship between Nathan and Allie and more about their background.
Not make focus on love triangle w Elizabeth. Dont pair Elizabeth w another Mountie. Maybe Faith gets with Nathan after long time away. Elizabeth and Carson begin to bond over sick baby jack.
Don’t bring back Abigail. Bill leaves in search of a better more cutting edge plastic surgeon.
Oil spill/drill accident and Henry comes full circle but this time comes out as the hero.
Undecided
Continued improvements and good writing.
Adoption for Rosemary and lee, mariage for Carson and Faith
I hope they keep moving on away from Jack's death and Abigail's unfortunate exit.
Henry finds love...as does Bill!
Elizabeth stopping balancing between the 2 new guys, Lee and Rosy with a child, Baby Jack growing, Henry's storyline.
\- Elizabeth having more plotlines that do not always involve romance.
- Henry finally finding love and happiness.
- Lucas being more accepted in the town.
- Lee and Rosemary adopting a child.
- More plotlines with Fiona.
Final season put the show out of its misery
Elizabeth to move forward with her life and maybe see her have some parenting struggles. I would like to see something happen that causes the whole town to rally together.
I hope we dont see a dragged out love triangle- the show does not need one. I don'f think its in Elizabeth's best interest to string along these two guys. Also I want to see more of what this season had- of was an even balence
Lee and Rosemary adopting. Henry dating. Carson and Faith breaking up. Elizabeth quit being in everyone's business and Abigal not being recast.
I want far more Henry content & Henry interactions. Elizabeth & Henry interactions particularly, but I'd love for him to interact more with Jesse & Clara. I want Nathan & Elizabeth to slowly end up together. I hope in them (hopefully) becoming a couple, Elizabeth can get more character development (but I love any kind of character development outside of relationships!!)
Elizabeth growing closer to Clara and Rosemary, Elizabeth/Lucas development, Jesse/Clara wedding + some good luck coming their way, Julie staying on as a series regular, Henry's continued redemption, Lee/Rosemary with a kid, Lee + an upswing for his company, etc.
The Coulters adopt, Henry trying to let the past go and maybe more of his personal life, Cody visiting Hope Valley for a few episodes, and Elizabeth happy (with or without a relationship) and continuing to enjoy motherhood and friends.
I would love to see Rosemary and Lee become parents, Elizabeth to find a new love and father for Baby Jack and Faith and Carson grow in their relationship.
Hopefully the close out who Elizabeth end and up with. It doesn’t even have to be Lucas or Nathan
Elizabeth find love
Rosemary and Lee to adopt
Carson and Faith engaged
Clara and Jesse get married
More Carson and Faith and Elizabeth falling for Nathan
More Henry
Lee & Rosemary adopt
Another girls night
I hope Elizabeth finds a new partner. This time, I hope the relationship isn’t dragged out for multiple seasons with no development. I hope Faith and Carson stay together and that Jesse and Clara get married. I also would like to see Lee and Rosemary adopt or maybe get pregnant after all.
I'm not ready to think about this yet! But honestly I think I'd like a low key wedding for Clara and Jesse the most.
Elizabeth stop by the saloon and find Lucas sick with fever and her and Carson will help him.  Lee and two men will be sick too because they were all playing poker.  The cause will be bad wisky bottle and Bill and Nathan will arrest a man doing smuggled alcohol. A girl can dream!
Lee and Rosemary adopt a child. Henry and a recast Abigail or another lady courtship.
Lee & Rosemary adopting. More of Elizabeth's relationships with Nathan and Lucas.
Jack back
Henry should find love, the coulters should adopt, Elizabeth should be with Nathan and he should quit the Mounties.
Something big
Rosemary and Lee adopting the little boy who had one line at the Festival. Rosemary finally getting a theatre. Allie staying. Elizabeth choosing either to stay single or I suppose date Nathan. Carson dating Fiona. Fun and light stories like this season. Plenty of humour.
Lee and Rosemary adopt Spencer and face trails of parenthood. A mayoral election. Elizabeth opening her heart. Carson and Faith face trails, but work through them. Clara and Jesse marry.
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