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#actually I find it a bit awkward and think that element of the script should have been refined a bit but it does play to overall charm
avelera · 2 years
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David Jenkins was a playwright before he was a TV showrunner and it so clearly shows in how OFMD was designed as a stage play. Indeed, our logistical questions around how Stede managed to find his crew with just a dinghy or why distances don't matter only come up because we can see the ocean and the distances thanks to the power of CGI movie magic and wouldn't even ping our collective consciousnesses if this was all happening on a stage as the story in its bones was clearly meant to, in this essay I will...
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zipzapzorilla · 3 months
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Opinion: Short-form woes
One of the worst feelings is thinking for literally hours trying to come up with a topic, only to find that it can be addressed in only a few sentences. Sure you could pad it out, but there's only so much filler you can put in before it's more filler than substance. You could think longer and try to elaborate, at the risk of falling into the sunk cost fallacy. Or else, regrettably, go back to the blank canvas and start over. Short-form content is all the rage these days, yet there can be little value in brief thoughts- too small to make entertaining, yet contain the essence of an idea that I desire to express.
Should I refrain from speaking until I have something big, bold, and theatrical to say?
As far as social media goes, functionally content that is too short doesn’t work. Posting as a regular video on Youtube leads to none of the views being counted. Posting it as a “short” does count the views but some are vocal about their dislike of shorts.
They could be combined into a longer video but it may be awkward with the topic changing drastically every few seconds and no overarching theme.
A lot of inspiration these days come from videos that are long and in depth, or have fancy effects and transitions. Personally, trying to achieve this could mean spending days “brainstorming” and not actually working on stuff.
It’s difficult to find a topic that enough could be said to fill such a video, that is worth saying that much about, and then doing all the designing and animation to make the video- let alone do it consistently and expecting no incentive to do so.
While you could call calling out this reality as merely being “lazy”, genuine contributions are difficult to make and hard to come by. As we all know by now some of the suspiciously prolific creators get there by...not doing this, but rather by copying existing scripts and topics. Even knowing their work has been discredited, it’s hard to shake the feeling that this creates an impossible standard.
Answers may lie outside the realm of commentary, but after being immersed in it for so long, it’s honestly difficult to expel the examples from my brain. That itself has some subgenres:
“drama” – scouring TikTok and such to report on the most mundane happenings (or perhaps, simply copying off someone else’s video and adding in a hefty dose of filler)
Movie reviews – This is something I’m actually interested in, but would have a hard time doing without showing any footage at all from the movie. Talking about plot elements is possible, but demonstrating specific visual elements is not. (outside of maybe putting timestamps and asking viewers to look it up themselves)
Educational/in-depth reviews – when done well, these are a bit of a “premium” subject. Anyone can put out minutes of low quality AI generated garbage, but few boast the trustworthiness and scale of these. These often include actual research into the topic. (obviously, this doesn’t exclude film history or film analysis, it’s just provided as a separate example)
My goals, and I think a certain someone would agree, are as a quote attributed to George Lucas goes, “faster, more intense”.
I want to continue the effort from 2023 to drag things out of the sedate form they’ve been in, while actually realizing a higher quality of media. I’m open to creating bizarre formats to see what will work, but obviously that requires that raw creativity that has so far only come in small bursts that are hard to build on or even capture.
Ironically, this blog post is longer than many of those recent ideas have been, and hopefully it won’t be the biggest burst of creativity this week.
-Zip Zorilla
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grailfinders · 3 years
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Fate and Phantasms #198
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Happy New Year! (If it is not new years, please disregard.) Today we're crossing into the 2020 servants; hopefully this build makes that clear.
Today we're building Katsushika Hokusai, the daughter/fatheroctopus painter duo, most famous for... waves? And also making a deal with Cthulhu. We're grabbing some levels in Creation Bard for the former, and Hexblade Warlock for the latter. Don't worry, it'll make sense as we go.
Check out their build breakdown below the cut, or their character sheet over here!
Next up:
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Race and Background
Oui is a Human. Her dad's an octopus, which is weird, but we'll deal with that later. Also, we're making her a variant human for cool stuff. She gets +1 Wisdom and Charisma, as well as Animal Handling proficiency to get along with her parents and the Magic Initiate feat, which uses her Wisdom to cast druid spells. Since magical paintbrushes aren't an official weapon in D&D 5e, we'll call it a quarterstaff instead, which means you can use Shillelagh to make it fancy and magical for the duration. It also turns the damage die into a d8, deals magical damage, and uses your wisdom instead of strength to hit things and deal damage. You also get Frostbite to splash cold water on people, and Protection from Evil and Good. You can cast that last one once a day for free, and it'll protect you against aberrations (plus celestials, elementals, fey, fiends, and undead) for ten minutes with concentration. They'll have disadvantage to hit you, and they cant' charm, frighten, or possess you, and any existing effects of that ilk you can shake off with advantage. No spoilers, but that'll come in handy soon enough.
You also get the Guild Artisan background, because you paint for money. That gives you Insight and Persuasion proficiency.
Ability Scores
Make your Charisma as high as possible. You paint good, and you have the mental fortitude to keep an elder god from yeeting your soul from your body. Good job. Second highest is Dexterity, painting lifesized waves in the air around you doesn't actually need all the backflips, you just like to show off. Your Wisdom is also pretty good, it's hard to paint things you can't see well, and again that whole "mental fortitude" thing. Your Constitution is pretty good, you handle all-nighters pretty well. That means your Strength isn't great, but we're dumping Intelligence. You're kind of a hick, after all. Plus, really? Swordbeauties?
Class Levels
Bard 1: You weren't born with the squid powers, so we'll grab those up a bit later. Right now you're just a plucky young artist with a dream. As a bard, you get proficiency with Dexterity and Charisma saves, as well as three skills of your choice. Performance and Nature will help you paint nature, and Arcana will help you find the squid guy in the first place. You get Bardic Inspiration, Charisma Modifier d6s per long rest, and you can give one to your allies to boost one attack, check, or save by however much they roll. Nothing like some tasteful nudes to get the spirits up. You also get Spells that you can cast using your Charisma. Friends makes it easier to pass charisma checks against a creature for a minute, but they'll know you magicked them afterwards. Thankfully, getting paid doesn't take that long. Minor Illusion helps you bring your paintings to life, but just a little bit. It'll create a still object or sound that lasts for up to a minute. Creatures can tell it's an illusion with an investigation check, or by touching it. You also get Animal Friendship- your dad can be hard to get along with. Color Spray weaponizes your paints to blind creatures in the area, and Illusory Script lets you write one thing, but really write another. I'm sure you can argue this should count for paintings as well. Oh, you also get Dissonant Whispers. You're a Foreigner, you can be a little creepy if ya wanna.
Bard 2: Second level bards become a Jack of All Trades, adding half their proficiency to skill checks they aren't proficient in. You're an anime character, it's an unwritten rule you should be good at everything. You also get a Song of Rest, adding a d6 to healing your party does over a short rest. On top of that, your bardic inspiration becomes Magical Inspiration, letting your allies add it to the damage or healing of a spell. Finally, grab the spell Silent Image for moving images, so now you can paint birds and/or waves and have them look just like the real thing. Now, third level of bard is where things start getting funky, so before we can do that, let's make a deal.
Warlock 1: Bouncing over to warlock lets you become a Hexblade, which sounds kind of weird, but there's a reason for that. You don't do weird mind stuff like the GOOlocks, and you don't really use Tentacles like the Fathomlocks. What you do need though, is a fancy magic brush, and a fancy magic octopus. There isn't a familiar-based subclass yet, so we had to go with the weapon-based one, and we'll pick up your dad later. Anyways, starting off as a Hexblade lets you invoke a Hexblade's Curse as a bonus action, dealing your proficiency in extra damage to the cursed creature, crit on 19s, and heal yourself when the cursed creature dies. The curse lasts 1 minute, and you can use this once per short rest. Hokusai also become a Hex Warrior, turning one non-two-handed weapon into a special weapon at the end of a long rest. Now your brush uses your Charisma to attack, nice. Unfortunately, this doesn't include magical damage, but you can stack this with Shillelagh if you really need to. You also get another set of spells with your Pact Magic. These slots recharge on short rests, and it means your multiclassing doesn't mix slots like most spellcasting classes would. You can still use one kind of slot to cast the other kind of spells though. Speaking of spells, grab Eldritch Blast for some paint splashes, and Mage Hand for a pseudo-octopus that'll grab things for you. Cause Fear lets you paint a really creepy thing one target can see, forcing a wisdom save and scaring them if they fail. Arms of Hadar will give you a little bit of tentacles, as a treat. They'll force a strength save on creatures near you, dealing necrotic damage and making them too gooey to take reactions.
Warlock 2: Second level warlocks get Eldritch Invocations, mini-feats to help you cope with only having two spell slots. Grab Armor of Shadows for free Mage Armor on yourself at will. Your family is your armor, and I mean that literally. Stop wearing your dad, it's creepy. You also get a second one, but we're saving that for the next level. Don't not take one now though, I'm just saying it won't matter in the long run.
Bard 3: Now that your pact is sealed, we can get the real living paintings going. If you're thinking 'bout an inking feel free to shuffle levels around, I just want to hit Font of Inspiration quickly. As a Creation bard, Hokusai gets an Inkling of Potential, adding extra effects to her bardic inspiration. Ability checks let the user roll twice, attack rolls deal extra thunder damage, and saving throws add temporary HP to the user. She can also enact the Performance of Creation, creating a nonmagical item nearby. Currently it must cost less than 20 times your bard level, and it has to be medium or smaller. You can do this once per long rest, or by spending a 2nd level slot, but doing so destroys the first object if it still exists. Right now this only makes medium objects, but a 5' wave of water is nothing to sneeze at. You also get Expertise in two skills, doubling your proficiency them. Pick up Insight and Performance for the ultimate style-copying skills. Finally, you get second level spells. We can't focus too much on non-charisma abilities, but this'll give you a leg up on seeing the true nature of things. It gives you advantage on any one kind of ability check for up to a minute.
Bard 4: Use your first Ability Score Improvement to bump up your Charisma. Now you have more inspiration, better spells, and a bigger brush. Charisma's good, you'll like charisma. You can also paint Dancing Lights and a Phantasmal Force now. The former lights up an area, the latter creates a phantasmal creature or object that only one creature can see for up to a minute. It can break the illusion with an Investigation check, but until then it treats the thing as completely real, rationalizing away inconsistencies. It also can take a bit of psychic damage if the illusion would cause harm within 5' of itself.
Bard 5: Fifth level bards become a Font of Inspiration like we talked about earlier, giving you inspiration recharges on short rests instead of long ones. Your inspiration also jumps to d8s. Finally, grab Major Image for more major illusions than minor image. It creates an object up to 20' on each side, and includes effects like sound, smell, and temperature, as long as they wouldn't deal damage. You can also move the illusion using your action. Same rules apply to breaking it though- investigation check or just touching it.
Warlock 3: Finally back in warlock, you get your pact boon, and the Pact of the Chain gives you Find Familiar as a ritual, and you can skip your own attack to attack with your familiar. Wildly enough, Octopus is already a rules as written option for Find Familiar. Awkward point; octopi can only be out of water for 30 minutes. Good luck with that! On top of that, Mirror Image lets you paint duplicates of yourself, making it harder to hit you. Boom, evade skill achieved. You get three extra copies, and every time you get hit, there's only a 25% chance of actually hitting the real one. If an illusion gets hit, it's destroyed, so the odds go up to 33%, then 50%. You also put in the Investment of the Chain Master, giving your dad a flying speed, the ability to attack as a bonus action, magical weapons, your DC for saves, and you can react to give the little bugger resistance to one instance of damage. Literally everyone else's dad is dead already, try not to add one more to the pile. Except for Romani's, but that's sad in its own way.
Warlock 4: Another ASI, max out your Charisma. It's good, you use it for literally everything. For spells, Mind Sliver deals psychic damage an makes the target's next save a bit harder to make. You also get a Crown of Madness, which gives you control over a creature's attack action. Just because you're less spooky than Abby doesn't mean you're not spooky.
Warlock 5: Fifth level warlocks get a new invocation and third level spell. Summon Shadowspawn lets you paint one of three kinds of shadowspawn, creepy little things that can scare people by screaming at them. They'll obey your commands, and it'll last up to an hour, until they hit 0 HP, or you drop concentration. Your last invocation is the Gift of the Depths, letting you breathe underwater and swim as fast as you can walk. Now it's slightly less awkward to carry your dad around, yay. You can also cast Water Breathing for free once per long rest.
Bard 6: Finally back in bard now, sixth level creation bards can put on an Animating Performance, turning a large or smaller item into a Dancing Item with its own stats and everything. You have to use your bonus action to command it in battle, but you can inspire people at the same time. I'm not sure how well animating water would work, but it's something to look into. You also learn how to Countercharm, spending your action to give creatures near you advantage on saves against being charmed or frightened. For something better, grab Intellect Fortress. For up to an hour, you'll resist psychic damage, and you get advantage on all Int, Wis, and Chr saves.
Bard 7: Seventh level bards get fourth level spells, like Hallucinatory Terrain! Now you can paint a landscape- literally! It's only 150' in range, but that's still plenty of space to mess with people. It doesn't really change anything, but forcing people to look at non-euclidean geometry is its own reward.
Bard 8: Another ASI. Bump up your Dex now so you're less likely to get hit, then grab Phantasmal Killer to paint a scary creature that will follow the target around and beat them up. It's a shame only one creature gets to see it.
Bard 9: Ninth level bards get a better song of rest, but more importantly you get fifth level spells. Legend Lore will help you see the true meaning of things more easily, and the more you already know about something the more you'll learn. That's why your Arcana and Nature skills are so high. Oh, wait, sorry, one sec...
Bard 10: And that's why your Arcana and Nature skills are so high... starting now, with another round of Expertise. Your inspiration also jumps to d10s, and you learn Magical Secrets, two spells from any spell list you can cast. On top of that, you get Prestidigitation to paint up small objects. For your secrets, Conjure Animals lets you paint up some real animals that'll attack enemies for you. Alternatively, you can Control Water to make those waves we've been trying to do with way less fuss than a Song of Creation or Animating Performance. It does come with the limit of using existing water, though you can also Part Water, cause a Whirlpool, or Redirect Flow with this one.
Bard 11: Eleventh level bards get a sixth level spell, and True Seeing will help you see All Things in Nature, letting you see through illusions, invisibility and the like.
Bard 12: One last ASI; bump up your Constitution for better concentration and more HP.
Bard 13: Your Song of Rest is a d10 now, and you get a seventh level spell. Prismatic Spray is the return of Color Spray, but it's taken steroids. Now it deals plenty of damage of a random type to each creature in its area, or it has a chance to shove them into another dimension or petrify them.
Bard 14: Your last goody from the college of creation is a Creative Crescendo, allowing you to paint up to your Charisma Modifier in items when you use a Performance of Creation. Only one can be a biggun, the rest have to be small or tiny. Also, your max size is Huge now, and a 15' cube of water will make a pretty big splash. You also get another round of Magical Secrets, grabbing you Conjure Elemental for a more symbolic approach to flooding people, and Wrath of Nature to paint a landscape that'll really fuck with someone. The grass turns land into difficult terrain, the trees will slash at enemies nearby, Roots and vines restrain enemies, and Rocks will throw themselves at enemies, knocking them prone on a failed strength save. It's not mind melting geometries, but it's still mess with people's heads.
Bard 15: Your ultimate level gives you a d12 inspiration die. You also get one last spell, of the eighth level. Feeblemind will handle all the mind melting the last level failed to live up to, forcing an intelligence save and dealing damage regardless. On a failed save, the creature's Intelligence and Charisma drop to 1, and it can't cast spells, use magic items, talk, or understand people. The only ways to fix this are with another Intelligence saving throw (every 30 days) or using Greater Restoration, Heal, or Wish.
Pros and Cons
Pros:
Like the regular Hokusai, this build has a great deal of flexibility, with pretty good AC, HP, and physical attack options to get up close and personal, as well as ways to buff allies and attack with spells at a distance.
Speaking of spells, they give you a lot of crowd control options. You can create extra allies with summoning spells and Animating Performance, blow them away with waves from Control Water or Performance of Creation, or keep them tied up with various illusions.
You're also really good at fighting other spellcasters. Spells like Protection from Evil and Good and Intellect Fortress will shore up most of your saves against fancier spells, and you can use Feeblemind to completely shut down anyone who isn't a wizard or artificer.
So piss off your patron and kick the ass of their flunkies, easy! Wait, there's still cons.
Cons:
Okay, so there are some problems with throwing waves all over the place: they're hard to control where exactly they end up. Also, your best wave requires real water, which won't always be available.
On a similar note, you specialize in summons and illusions, both of which tend to require Concentration saves. Yours aren't that great, and on top of that it means you can only have one up at a time. Unless you're cool with an elemental running around willy nilly, but that fits into Con #1.
Your Familiar can only stay on dry land for 30 minutes at a time. If you're going to play this in a landlocked campaign, switch the octopus and last invocation for something else, it'll be a pain otherwise.
Okay, she isn't perfect, just make sure you carry an aquarium with you, problem solved, right?
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lokiondisneyplus · 3 years
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Holy crap. Look at Kate Herron's shirt. When the Loki director pops up on Zoom, she's donning the most glorious image anyone will see since we laid eyes on Alligator Loki: A Teletubby wearing the Loki horns. Are the Teletubbies Loki variants? Sure, why not!
"I got it on Instagram," Herron says. "There's an amazing comic book artist and he designed it. He made it into a T-shirt for me because I saw it and was like, 'That's incredible. Can I get it for the press junket?'"
Herron, no big deal, just pulled off an MCU miracle. Entering a mammoth franchise with, notably, some of Sex Education's best episodes under her belt, the director deftly brought a plot involving multiverses and Richard E. Grant in a cape and superhero mumbo-jumbo to brilliant, beautiful life. Following Loki's tear-jerking, mind-bending finale, the series has been dubbed by critics and fan's alike as one of Marvel's best efforts—which is no small feat. Of course, we needed to ask Herron how she stuck the landing. Following the most epic finale you, me, or any Teletubby can remember, Herron talked to Esquire about the Miss Minutes jump scare, filming the finale's introduction of He Who Remains, and why she won't return for Season Two of Loki.
ESQ: How are you doing?
KH: I'm good. I think I feel very relieved that I don't have to sit on the secret of He Who Remains anymore, It was a very big secret to hold, but for an important reason, right? Because it's such a good character to be launching. So yeah, I feel good.
ESQ: Loking back at your old interviews, you have such a good poker face when you're avoiding spoilers, but you're also incredible at giving aggregator crumbs.
KH: I play a lot of board games, so you need to be quite good at strategy and poker faces so people can't always read your hand. So I think weirdly board games have prepared me more for working with Marvel than anything else.
ESQ: I have to start with the Miss Minutes jump scare. What went into the decision to make her a memeable, creepy apparition in that moment?
KH: I love horror, and my executive, Kevin Wright, knew that. Me and him were talking about Episode Six and I remember that he was like, "Oh, maybe you could do something creepy of Miss Minutes." And I immediately was like, "We have to do a jump scare!" Because I haven't got to do a good jump scare in anything yet and I really wanted to, because a lot of my friends are horror directors. I was like, "I can't let them down." So I was really excited to have a shot at doing a jump scare. And Miss Minutes, it was really fun testing it because we'd kind of bring different people into the edit, me and Emma McCleave, the editor, and we'd just play it for them, watch them, and check that they were jumping when we cut it.
ESQ: One thing that I think is getting missed in all the craziness is that we see a peak moment of the love story between Loki and Sylvie. Where does the finale leave the companionship that they found in each other?
KH: When I started the show, that was always in the DNA of it—that Loki was going to meet a version of himself and they were going to fall in love. And that's honestly what drew me into the story, because I directed Sex Education. I love stories about self-love and finding your identity and your people. Loki is such a broken character when we join him, and seeing him go on this amazing journey with all this growth and finding the good points of himself in seeing her—I think that was very beautiful. It's also paying respect to the fact that Sylvie's in a very different place to him. She hasn't had the Mobius therapy session. She even says, in Episode Five, "I don't know how to do this. I don't have friends." You really feel for her because she has been on the run and her whole life has been this mission.
It's almost funny because these characters are thousands of years old, but it's almost teenage the way they both talk about their feelings for each other. I think everyone can relate to that, right? In any new relationship, there's always that kind of awkwardness and like, "Oh God, am I too keen? The important thing was the hope—like when Sylvie and him kiss, I think it is genuine and it is coming from a place of these feelings they have for each other. Obviously she does push them through that door, but for me it was a goodbye and it was with heart. But it's kind of a goodbye in the sense of like, I care about you, but I'm going to do my mission because that's where I'm at.
ESQ: I would pay for you to direct the Sex Education episode where Otis falls through a portal into the multiverse, into the main MCU.
KH: He really looks like a Loki as well, which is so funny. I always thought that. I was like Asa does look like a Loki. It didn't come to pass or anything, but it would be interesting to do a Sex Ed-Marvel crossover. I wonder who all the different characters would be within the MCU, but it would be quite funny.
ESQ: You're right, he could pull off a teenage Loki.
KH: Yeah, like a teen or a very young ’20s, maybe. But it was just funny because I was like, "Oh yeah, he looks a bit like Tom." I wonder how they could do it. I'm sure they'll find a way to do a crossover anyway.
ESQ: Can you just take me back to filming with Jonathan Majors? And you capturing him in such a compelling, quirky, scary way—I'm sure your direction was such a big part of that.
KH: I was just so excited because Jonathan is an actor that everyone was so excited about. He's like a chameleon in everything he does and he's so talented. I just feel as a director so lucky to have worked on this because I feel like I've got to work with some of the best actors out there. And when you're with Jonathan, you know you're in the presence of just someone really magnificent. For me as a director, it's giving him the space to play and feel safe. Because we filmed it all in a week, but it was a lot to film in a week. So I think it was really about creating a space where he could have fun and find this character because he's going to be playing him for a long time.
ESQ: What went into the decision to introduce us to the good guy first?
KH: I remember in the script, he comes up the elevator and it was so casual. I was like, "Oh man, that's so fun." And then Jonathan, when he plays it, he's relaxed. And I the thing he used to talk about a lot was that this is a character who's been on his own for a long time. Because at the beginning, we introduced him in a space in the universe that feels like this very busy, loud place, but actually, when we see the Citadel, he's surrounded by the Timeline and he's very isolated. Even in his costume with [designer] Christine Wada, for the idea of his outfit, he's a character who's existed for multiple millennia. So it's like, OK, let's pull from lots of different places so you can't necessarily pin down which time or which place he might be from. Also the fact that his clothes look comfy. They were like pajamas because he's living at home. He loved the idea of the office [being] the only finished part of the citadel and that the rest of the citadel was like this Sunset Boulevard kind of dusty, dilapidated space. And just again showed that he probably just keeps himself to his office. All those elements definitely fed into Jonathan's performance in terms of balancing the extrovert, but also the introvert of someone that would be living by themselves and only talking to a cartoon clock.
ESQ: It really is incredible how you pull a nail-biting finale with this battle of wits and dialogue.
KH: It was really exciting because I feel like Episode Five was a lot of fun because we got to play into all the joy of the different versions of Loki, but also just the fact that it was our big usual Marvel third act, right? Like it was where our big spectacle was as they were fighting this big monster. But I love that our finale bookends, right? We began with a conversation and we ended with one.
ESQ: I also loved that there was no end-credits scene—I think it makes the ending that much more impactful. Was there ever an end credit scene on the table, or any kind of a stinger?
KH: I think no, because weirdly, we never went after the kind of mid-credit sequences. I think we always just were thinking just of the story and where we knew we wanted it to end. For example, Episode Four, originally Loki was deleted and then we went straight to him waking up. And it was only in the edit I was like, “I think it'd be really cool actually. We should move that scene to mid-credits because then we'll really feel like Loki has died." Because if I watched that moment and then it went to the credits, I'd be like, "What?!" And then when we were talking about the best way to talk about Season Two, we were like, "Okay, well, let's do that like a little mid-credits at the end because that is exciting to confirm it in that way." I'd say we found both of those in the edit just because we wanted to kind of do it right and have a fun nod to something that Marvel does so well.
ESQ: Is there anything you can tell about the future of the story you've told here—or even where you personally would like to go with the studio or otherwise going forward?
KH: Yeah, so I'm just on for Season One. So I'm so proud of the story we told. I mean, it was amazing getting to set up the TVA and take Loki on this whole new journey. And I mean, I think we've left so much groundwork for his character, and as people see in the comics, there's so much more to be delved into. And I just am excited honestly to just see where all the characters go. Like, who is B-15? What did she see in those memories and where did Ravonna go and where is Loki? I think for me, we've set up these questions and I look forward to seeing them being answered as a fan in the next season.
ESQ: Absolutely. Well, can we please work on the Asa Butterfield Loki?
KH: I will call him and I'll be like, "You want to do some crazy Marvel crossover?"
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woogyu · 3 years
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A World Tinted Gold | Mingyu; Chapter Two
Kalon; beauty that is more than skin-deep
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streamer!y/n x werewolf!mingyu
notes; werewolf au
word count; 1749
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summary; The only werewolves you encountered were the ones living inside your video games. They were nothing more to you than mythical creatures you often had to kill in order to complete objectives. You had a good thing going with your online gaming setup. Your supporters were kind and usually tipped well during streams. Sure it meant you had to deal with the occasional creep sliding into your DMs, but it was worth it. Playing games online was putting you through college. Little did you know your quiet life was about to be turned upside down at the hands of someone you didn’t think existed outside of the virtual world.
»»————- ♡ ————-««
“Are you seriously watching that steamer again? Why don’t you just play the games yourself?” Seungcheol questioned as he stepped into Mingyu’s room, chuckling as the younger wolf quickly turned around and blushed.
“It’s not the same… I’m not really interested in the games, I’m interested in her” Mingyu admitted sheepishly, reaching up to scratch the back of his neck. He didn’t know what it was about you that made him so transfixed, but he had a hard time tearing his eyes from the screen. Hell, just the other day when you read his comment aloud, he was over the moon.
“It’s rare for you to show interest in a girl at all” Seungcheol remarked, eyebrow pulled up in question. Until a wolf found its mate there was little reason to get involved with or show interest in others romantically. There were of course some wolves that preferred being unmated; it allowed them to be explorative with their romantic partners. Not all wolves longed to find their mate, and not all wolves would end up finding their mates. He knew destiny had a hand to play in it all, but the thought of never finding who he was supposed to be with made the wolf in him whine. Mingyu wasn’t an unmated wolf that enjoyed exploring his options, he was desperately waiting for the day he met his mate. Right now, Mingyu wasn’t sure if he was simply lonely or if there was something more going on.
“There is just something about her…” Mingyu started, pausing for a second to find the right words, “I just have a hard time tearing my eyes away from the screen. There is something about her that just draws me in” Mingyu explained. He wasn’t doing a very good job at explaining the feelings that bubbled up inside him when he saw you on screen. When he tried to explain it he could never quite describe the feeling that settled over his chest and body, it was a warmth almost like a subtle glow within him.
Seungcheol didn’t comment on it any further as he moved into the room and crossed his arms over his chest. Mingyu knew better than to ignore the alpha, closing his laptop he turned to face Seungcheol fully. Their pack had a different dynamic than most. Normally a thirteen-member pack would be impossible because of the strain it put on the head alpha. It worked for them because while Seungcheol was their main alpha, they had two secondary alphas, Jihoon and Soonyoung. The three of them shared the work of looking after the group and it worked perfectly for them. He liked that the alphas didn’t abuse their power, there was a lot of lenience in the pack and it made for less confrontations.
“Joshua has to head into town tonight and won’t be able to run the perimeter. Would you be alright with doing it?” Seungcheol asked, pursing his lips as he looked down at the younger wolf. Mingyu normally enjoyed running the perimeter, it meant he got to shift and stretch his body, but this time he was a little bit more hesitant with his answer. Mingyu knew that later on tonight you would have a new video posted and he would have to wait even longer to watch it. It seemed like a silly reason, but his heart ached at the thought of not being able to ‘see’ you on screen until early tomorrow morning.
“Sure! I don’t mind” Mingyu answered with a half-smile, Seungcheol never asked him for much so he figured he could help him out with this. Seungcheol breathed a sigh of relief as he leaned back against the wall.
“Thank you, I didn’t really want to be the one stuck doing it again” Seungcheol admitted, the alpha had been on perimeter duty for the past 3 nights and must have been eager for a good night’s sleep. Mingyu smiled and nodded his head a few times, his own wants would just have to be paused for a little while.
Before leaving the room Seungcheol patted him on the shoulder, yawning a little bit as he headed toward what Mingyu assumed was his own room. Mingyu was thankful that Seungcheol’s parents had left him their families pack house. Coming from a family of alpha’s certainly had its perks, and it meant they all got their own rooms.
Once Seungcheol was gone he checked the time, he had roughly 4 hours before he would have to head out.
»»————- ♡ ————-««
“I just don’t understand what this trend is supposed to be” you complained to Ciri for probably the 20th time over your video call. Apparently, there was a trend going around among streamers to recreate video games in real life. You hadn’t thought much of it when it first gained popularity, but now Ciri thought it would be a good idea for the two of you to join in on it. Her big plan was a two-part video where the two of you recreated iconic aspects of the Witcher 3 video game. You should have known she would want to do it, she already owned a Cirilla cosplay.
“It’s going to be fun” Ciri reminded you, drawing out the last syllable as she drew a fake scar along her face, effectively transforming herself into the iconic video game character.
“Come on, I even sent you the Yennefer cosplay and everything!” she exclaimed, using her make up brush to point at the camera accusingly. You rolled your eyes as you reached up to adjust the dark black wig that you now wore. To her credit, Ciri had sent you everything you would need to transform yourself into Yennefer of Vengerberg. How she somehow guessed your sizing right you would have no idea. Probably the Witcher powers.
“I wish we lived in the same city” you sighed, leaning your head back and looking up at the ceiling. Things would be so much easier if you and Ciri, and the other girls, didn’t live so far away from one another. But that was the price you paid for finding your friends online.
“Me too” Ciri said with a gentle sigh, setting her make up tools down and picking up her phone, her face coming into full view.
“I sent you the script, I won’t be able to stay on the call with you while we are filming because data rates are crazy, but I know you’ll do amazing” Ciri said with a reassuring smile. You would have to film all of this on your own, which was just a little bit intimidating. Ciri’s script mostly just directed you to do a lot of handwaving and she would add in the ‘magic’ elements later.
“Just find a good spot in the woods and it’ll be perfect” Ciri finished with a nod of her head. You sighed, straightening yourself up and looking down at your phone.
“I’ll call you later on when I’m finished to send you the video” you mumbled, pouting a little bit as you stood and picked up your phone.
“Good luck!” Ciri told you, waving a little bit before ending the call. Great, now you actually had to go do it…
»»————- ♡ ————-««
You were lucky there was quite a bit of woods around where you lived, the problem was going to be trying to get to the woods without anyone seeing the ridiculous clothes you were wearing. You threw on a huge coat, effectively covering up most of the costume. After grabbing the bag with your equipment, you ventured outside, keeping your head down as you walked to avoid drawing attention.
Twenty minutes later you were standing in the middle of a beautiful calm forest. Now that you were here you questioned why you didn’t come out here more often. You couldn’t hear the loud noises that came with living in a bustling city and the air felt fresh on your face. Once you reached a small clearing by a river you laid your things down and took a deep breath, basking in the coolness of the air. Maybe this trend wouldn’t be so bad.
After setting up your camera in a place you were at least half sure wouldn’t result in it falling over, you walked into frame and took a deep breath. You briefly checked your phone to see what Ciri’s notes asked of you, before you began doing your best to follow directions. Your portion of the video wouldn’t be long, but you did re-film it 4 times to try and get your motions to be less stiff.
After forty-five minutes of waving your arms around, you walked back to your camera, picking it up before taking a seat on a nearby log. Reviewing the footage, you winced at how awkward it looked, you seriously hoped that Ciri could work some magic on this because you didn’t have it in you to film it again.
The forest around you was darkening as the day began to draw to a close, but you couldn’t bring yourself to head back right away. The forest was too peaceful and serene. Reaching up you pulled your wig off, stuffing it in your bag as you sighed with relief. You closed your eyes and took a deep breath, focusing in on the sounds of nature around you. Maybe coming to the woods would become a weekly thing for you, like therapy.
A low deep growl broke you out of your trance, your eyes flying open and flickering around to find the source. Your heart hammered against your chest, and your whole body stiffened in fear. A few moments later a dark black wolf emerged from the trees, larger than any wolf you had seen on tv. You could vaguely see blood dripping from its muzzle, and its dark red eyes were focused right on you.
It paused at the edge of the clearing, its lips pulling back to reveal sharp blood-stained teeth. Your breath came quick as you leaned back, unsure if you should run or try and hide behind the log. Both seemed unhelpful in this current situation, but you were really low on options.
The wolf’s body tensed before springing toward you. Your hands instinctively grabbed whatever was nearest to you, which happened to be your very expensive camera, and threw it toward the wolf. This did nothing to deter the predator from its prey, and within seconds the beast was on you.
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bleachandgrenadine · 4 years
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Hopeful Predictions for the ATLA Netflix Adaptation, What They Need to Get Right, and How They Can Make it Work.
[Long Post]
**I had this post in my drafts, and after the announcement that Bryke are leaving, what better time to post this? All hope is not lost, maybe this is a good sign that it won’t go off the rails with Bryke’s shitty writing ability and bad ideas.**
Before I get into it, they pretty much need to take extra care to get everything right, because the show is nearly perfect and it is so beloved. To adapt what is widely considered one of the best animated TV shows of all time into a live action series, will be no easy feat. So here’s what I think they can do to make it the best it can possibly be. Their budget is unknown, so granted they’d need a fairly high budget to make this all work. Hopefully they do because the pressure of high expectations is on them.
The episodes will have a longer run time. Likely 30-48 minutes give or take, with some of the heavier plot-advancing episodes being closer to an hour or more. Some of the more ‘filler’ or rather side adventure episodes may be a two in one type of deal, or will simply be expanded on from the original 22 minutes to 30 minutes or so. Hopefully they will do this by adding more character moments to improve upon their development, and give the episodes a more significant connection to the main plot.
It shouldn’t be a copy and paste remake. They need to have a balanced and objective view on what elements need to be the most faithful and what can be changed and improved/expanded on. For example, I think they could add a bit to certain backstories and expand on some historical elements and lore. (For the love of god though don’t take the retconning lore from book 2 of Korra.) I’m actually going to add to this and make a Part II of things I’d like to see fleshed out.
Up the maturity of the tone a *little* bit. The majority of the audience and fans watching are going to be older, so tweaking it some may be appropriate. Many of the more mature themes and action in the original had to be censored to air on Nickelodeon. Not saying make it overly serious and dark, but adjusting it with higher stakes and suspense would make sense in the live action.
Casting. Casting accordingly to the characters’ ethnicities is a given, of course. But it might be difficult find child actors of the same age as the characters with the range needed to fill the role, including martial arts and stunt work. So I’m predicting that the cast may be a little older, and they might even age up the characters as well.
Additionally, it’ll probably take more than a year to film all three seasons, so if they cast 12-16 year olds it’ll be obvious that they’ve gotten older. SO they may have to extend Aang’s deadline to master all four elements. Idk maybe the comet is two summers away. We’ll see how they handle it.
Humor. The cartoon had, well, cartoonish moments that don’t translate well into live action if you try to recreate them. In the cartoon you had bigger and exaggerated expressions/movement accompanied by music and cartoon sound effects, not all of was like that but you know what I’m talking about. I think a good way to approach the comedic moments is *kinda* like how Marvel does it in terms of timing, delivery, how other characters react to it. This is just my personal two cents.
Bending and martial arts styles. One of the problems we saw in Shyamalan’s film was exactly how NOT to do fight/bending choreography. In the show, every movement has a purpose, and the element they’re bending has an equivalent reaction. In the film we saw a lot of over the top fancy dancy movements with no equivalent reaction. This is something most action and superhero movies get right, so they better not fuck this up.
Culturally accurate costuming but keeping the color palette of the original.
Speaking of color palette, I hope the director doesn’t go for the dark and washed out look. Don’t be afraid of saturation and a bit of stylized cinematography. It’s a fantasy world! Make it pretty!
CGI and special effects are another technical thing that could make or break this show.
Leave out the fan service, pandering, and shipping bait. If you’re not going to include certain things from the original (that are inconsequential to the series) don’t try to allude to or reference it or put in a little Easter egg. It’s awkward and more often then not disrupts the flow of whatever scene it’s thrust into, like it’s almost always an afterthought to please fans.
Script/dialogue: There was a lot of great dialogue in the original. (Iroh’s quotes should not be changed too much, that’s a given) I have a feeling that the writers may try to keep it close to the original, but I am hopeful that the end result is more depth, maturity, complexity, and more organic interactions between characters.
That’s all I got for right now, look for Part 2 soon!
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iohourtime · 3 years
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Kiokuya (The Memory Eraser) Review - With Spoilers
Since I read the book, sort of followed the filming progress, and read a bunch of interviews (that all sounded the same after a while), I should finish off by writing a review for the movie itself! 
Thanks to the pandemic, I was stuck at home watching Netflix for 7 months, so I’ve watched all sorts of movies & TV; sadly most are in the average to crappy category. To me, Kiokuya was probably in the average to slightly above average category. In other words, there are elements I like and there are things I feel the movie can improve on.
The review is a bit long since apparently I have a lot of thoughts about the script.😅 I pretty much summed up my thoughts in the “theme” section. If you are interested in the book / movie differences & things from the DVD visual commentary, I included those in the script & characters section. (Movie Walker included highlights from the visual commentary here.) . If you want to discuss the movie but don’t want to put spoilers on Twitter, leave me a message.
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Theme:
The movie’s main theme is obviously about memory. If a memory is making your life miserable, or even stopping you from living, is it better to erase it? Or do all memories, even bad ones, shape you as a human? If someone’s memory of you is gone, are you killed in their minds? If you think someone is better off forgetting you, do you have the right to ask Kiokuya to erase their memories of you? Are the memories gone forever? If you have the power to erase someone’s memory, what are your responsibilities? And to some extent, what are the criteria to evaluate each request and what due diligence should you do before you accept this task? These were the questions the movie wanted you to ask. You know because the movie kept hitting you on the head through the dialogue! That’s probably my main complaint about the movie.
I didn’t study film so I don’t know the theories, but I think being heavy handed at telling you what you should be thinking is like listening to a textbook; it robs the audience of the chance to experience and internalize what they saw, and as a result, they are less able to connect emotionally to the film. That’s not to say people are not moved by the movie and empathize with the characters. I feel that it had more to do with the actors than the script though.
I think the cinematography was generally nice. I liked how they used the drone shots to film the beautiful Hiroshima scenery. The sunset scene was beautiful. The music did not seem intrusive. Other than that, I’m not sure I have more to say. (Fine. Yamada looked good in the plaid shirts and his hair was on point.)
Script vs Book: (Spoiler alert from here on!)
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Kiokuya, the movie, was an adaptation of a “horror” novel of the same name. Although there were horror elements, mostly because Kiokuya was kind of a shadowy figure, even the novel itself was focused more on humanity. The original story was divided into 4 parts; the first 3 parts were really 3 separate short stories that explored different reasons people have for wanting their memories erased. The final part was about Kiokuya herself. The Ryoichi character simply served as a bridge between the stories. Here’s a brief description:
Kyoko - A while ago, she was attacked in a dark alley but was saved at the last minute. Even though she was unharmed, she developed a crippling phobia of the dark, so she locked herself inside her home at night and was not able to live a normal life. She and Ryoichi were kinda but not really dating, and Ryoichi, being a typical guy, figured he could fix her. Kyoko tried everything but as a last resort, she asked Kiokuya to erase her memory of the attack. Since her relation with Ryoichi was based almost entirely on overcoming the phobia, she forgot him too. Through this incident, Ryoichi remembered how Maki had her memory erased when she was 5 or 6 - she saw her mom confessing to her dad that she had an affair with her uncle. Kiokuya might have erased Maki’s memory a second time when she was 10-12. Finally, he realized he “forgot” about his year-long investigation of Kiokuya with Takahara & others. It seemed like he was doggedly pursuing Kiokuya because he felt violated more than his undying love for Kyoko. In his own words, he didn’t try to rebuild his relationship with Kyoko again after she forgot about him. There was nothing stopping him, so his feelings towards Kyoko were not that deep.
Takahara - He was a 30 year old ikemen lawyer, though like the movie, he was dying. The chapter focused on his touching friendship with his assistant. Takahara was also close with Nanami, a suicidal, 17-year-old daughter of a client who became very attached to him. When Takahara found out Nanami planned to kill herself after he died, he asked Kiokuya to erase her memory of him so that she would live on.
Misao & Kaname - They were childhood friends and Misao started crushing on Kaname. She confessed and was rejected, but after that, they were not able to be friends like before. She figured if she erased everything about Kaname, they may be able to start over and become friends again without the awkward feelings.
Maki - Ryoichi thought Maki was looking for Kiokuya to erase some unpleasant memories. Then he found out she was Kiokuya, who inherited her ability from her grandfather. In the end, Maki confessed to the burden of being Kiokuya and Ryoichi told her he would support her and that she didn’t have to do it alone. Maki decided to erase anything Kiokuya related in his memory, but their friendship remained intact. Oh, Maki was 17 in the book and also had a crush on Ryoichi. She erased his memories many times before. Like in the movie, she also would like Ryoichi to love her just once, although he never ever saw her as anyone other than his annoying little sister. 😅
The director of the movie, Hirakawa Yuichi, also wrote or co-wrote the script. While the movie stuck to the themes of the novel, the motivations were completely different. Kyoko and Misao were both rape victims, Takahara now wanted to protect his young daughter from the sadness of his death, and Maki was herself kidnapped by a psychopath when she was a kid. I guess Hirakawa needed to pump up the drama and felt the stakes were not high enough for a 2 hour movie? There is always some uneasiness with using rape and trauma to move the story along. I guess there is a difference between this and the usual example of “fridging a female character”, i.e. kill a love interest of the hero to motivate him on some journey. Ryoichi was motivated by being erased and he actually gradually realized he should not push for restoring Kyoko’s memories if it was her wish. He only found out what happened to her at the end of the movie. Considering their relationship in the movie was a lot more serious, they couldn’t really use the phobia of darkness reason. However, it would also take something really big for Kyoko to want her memory erased while not talking to Ryoichi beforehand. Anyway, I really don’t see a way out of this.
For Misao though, I didn’t think they needed to make her a victim of the same serial rapist, especially when they use the same reason as the book for erasing Kaname. I suppose they need to explain why Nanami (and later Ryoichi) was looking into them? But they could just have the doctor referred the case (who appeared to be breaking doctor-patient confidentiality?! Just me?) In fact, the whole Misao / Kaname storyline didn’t really do much other than allowing Ryoichi to find out from Kaname that Kiokuya was a young girl.
Maki’s childhood trauma was also a bit excessive. I can’t see it as anything other than to get Ryoichi out to Hiroshima to talk to Grandpa. While finding out mom was “dealing with” uncle would be traumatic for a young child, it might not be dramatic enough for a movie.
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Ryoichi & Maki’s origins were also changed. They were now raised in Hiroshima and moved to Tokyo to attend university. The only reason was to place Grandpa-Kiokuya in Hiroshima after the bombing. While I liked the grandpa scene, was it necessary? They already covered the “Kiokuya after WWII” with the interview with the elderly woman. I think they could still keep Grandpa, since he was Kiokuya (and ironically suffering from Alzheimer’s) but maybe just skip the elderly woman part and use those minutes to build Ryoichi & Kyoko’s relationship! 
Upgrading Ryoichi & Kyoko’s relationship to being engaged gave him more incentive to look for Kiokuya, but all we got to see was 1 proposal scene and some snapshots, which made it harder for us to understand the loss Ryoichi experienced when Kyoko forgot him. Ultimately, I feel that more time should be given to the “before” times. They don’t even need that much. If done effectively like the movie Searching with John Cho, 5 minutes or so of clips would be enough to get us to care more. I’m not saying people won’t care, but it’s true that there are people who didn’t quite feel it. Yamada basically had to sell it with longing looks at Renbutsu, so how deeply you feel for them depends on whether you buy it or not.
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Takahara’s story might have been changed because of who they cast. Also, Takahara & Nanami’s relationship in the book was kinda weird, considering Nanami actually loved him and she was 17 while he was 30. I definitely cannot agree with how Movie Takahara wanted to erase his daughter’s memory to spare her the pain of losing him. It reminded me of that Black Mirror episode where the mom put in a blocker to shield her daughter from bad things. It ended up messing up the girl & broke their relationship. Young children are resilient and the sadness would eventually change into something else, which would shape their characters. Also, just because she forgot her birth father didn’t mean she would suddenly get along with her stepfather. I won’t even get into the whole consent thing. It was a good thing Maki did not follow through.
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Less good was what Movie Maki did to Ryoichi & Kyoko though. When I found out Movie Ryoichi & Kyoko were engaged instead of “pre-dating” like in the book, I was quite worried they would have Movie Maki erase Ryoichi from Kyoko’s mind for selfish reasons. I was hoping that maybe he got erased by mistake, but unfortunately, the script did go with the jealousy angle, which made Maki extremely unsympathetic.
In the visual commentary, they said they rewrote the ending because it didn’t fit. Maki erased her entire existence from Ryoichi's mind as penance for what she did. (I think initially, they were going with the book ending where Maki just erased Kiokuya from his head.) In the end, the actual cut used in the movie was more ambiguous - they “left it to the audience” to decide how much Maki erased and whether Ryoichi & Kyoko got a second chance at happiness. (The director said it ended on a hopeful note. Take it how you want.)
It’s unclear if Movie Maki erased Ryoichi’s memories more than once, but Book Maki had done it many times. Even though Book Maki seemed more responsible with her powers and didn’t slip up like Movie Maki, she did wipe part of Ryoichi’s memories without his consent. Ryoichi said that she didn’t have to do this alone and she could lean on him, so why didn’t she? Also, losing all that memory got to have some long term effect on him, right? In the movie, it was worse because Maki took the “easy” way out by erasing herself. Yes, she was punishing herself, but shouldn’t the more courageous thing to do was to own up to what she had done and work for Ryoichi’s (& Kyoko’s) forgiveness?
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Speaking of Ryoichi’s forgiveness, I actually saw some viewers calling Ryoichi a cad for telling Maki that he would always protect her and be by her side to protect her. Apparently they seemed to think he was in love with Maki and forgot all about Kyoko. Well, I think in that moment, there were 3 things going on: 1) Takahara told him that it was better to forgive and that there will be justice in other ways, 2) he understood why it was devastating to Kyoko to remember what happened and 3) Maki was like his little sister. His immediate desire to comfort his friend overrode the anger and betrayal he might have felt. Had Maki not erased his memory around 2 minutes after, who knew if they would have a more substantial talk? He didn’t even have a chance to talk to Kyoko. (I suspect Maki would have tried to “spare him” by erasing his relationship with Kyoko as well. He still ended up at the cafe because he could remember physically going there a lot.)
Overall, I think the movie was a bit unfocused due to some extraneous storylines and having too much exposition, which was a disservice to some of the characters. It failed to show how their relationships build, like Ryoichi & Takahara became buddies over what seemed like a week! I wish they trimmed a couple of the minor stories and used that time to go deeper on the main lines.
Characters / Actors:
Yoshimura Ryoichi (Yamada Ryosuke)
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I was watching the movie and halfway through when it hit me… Yamada’s Ryoichi was… normal? I mean obviously quite good looking in the boy-next-door kind of way, but Ryoichi was a regular, run-of-the-mill university student, who was normally an optimistic and forgiving but happened to be dealing with heartbreak at the moment. Seriously, if you’ve watched Yamada’s other works, his characters are usually kind of comedic, sort of pathetic, occasionally brilliant, psychotic, or… non-human. (Very odd roles for a Johnny’s actor.) He probably has not been this normal since the 24Hr drama. He still cried a lot, so that’s familiar.
OK, let’s get back on topic. Since Book Ryoichi functioned more as a character that connects the short stories rather than a real character, I didn’t have hopes for the movie version. Surprisingly, Movie Ryoichi came across as a real person and I did care what happened to him. While we didn’t get to see how Ryoichi & Kyoko were in happier times, he was able to convey the longing and slight awkwardness in their interaction when he tried to talk to her after. Similarly, in the scene where he learned of Takahara’s death, you could tell what was going through his mind even though he said nothing. Same with the final “confrontation” with Maki. Even though he didn’t say much, his eyes conveyed the emotions subtly: the longing, shock, confusion, etc. Overall, he was quite subtle and natural. As the articles say, he managed to “suppress his aura” and played an average guy. I hope he can play more of these subtle types of roles in future. (It is unfortunate that a lot of people have preconceived notions about Johnny’s actors, to put it politely. It’s like the reverse of the “fan blinder” that we sometimes get accused of having.)
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Now there are some discussions as to whether he overacted in the crying scenes. The main “crying” scenes were probably 1) confession to grandpa in Hiroshima, 2) in the rain, and 3) reading the letter. I’ve seen people say he overacted in either 1) or 2).
When I first watched the Hiroshima scene, I did feel that his crying may have been a bit much because I was watching the movie with just Japanese subtitles, so I missed an important detail: Ryoichi told his mom he was going to Hiroshima to confront his past. When you consider that Ryoichi had been carrying the guilt for “causing” Maki’s kidnapping for 15 years, it was totally reasonable for him to prostrate himself in front of Grandpa. He would also be relieved when Grandpa told him the statute of limitation was over and he should forgive himself. As an aside, according to the director in the visual commentary, Yamada cried in the first take of the scene. Hirakawa said “Aren’t you crying too much?” Yamada said “OK, I’ll do another take without crying.” However, when the Director was cutting the movie together, he suddenly saw Ryoichi’s mental journey and ended up using the first take because it was the logical conclusion to the closure he got.
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In the rain scene, he just learned about Kyoko’s attack. Knowing how much hurt she endured and how he did nothing to support and comfort her, he was still in a state of shock when he got knocked down. Then the dam burst and he cried hysterically. That seemed quite reasonable to me. I was more shocked that nobody checked on the guy who fell on the pavement and was crying. Pedestrians were cold! So I don’t really understand the objection to that scene. Maybe they thought this was something that happened a while ago and/or he didn’t love Kyoko that much, so he wouldn’t be that emotional?
I don’t think people have issues with the letter scene? Narratively, it made the most sense since he was close with Takahara, who was literally speaking to him from the grave via the letter. Oh, they talked about filming the letter scene in the visual commentary. Yamada was just reading the letter in silence and they added in Takahara’s narration in post production. Since he wanted to save the emotional outburst for the real take, he did not dare to look at the letter during the rehearsal.
One last thing, Yamada and Yoshine spoke in Hiroshima-ben when they were talking amongst each other. I have horrible listening skills and while I think he used some slang or phrasing, his accent still seemed mostly Kanto. It’s like if I call a bunch of people “wankers” with a Canadian accent; it doesn’t make me sound English. Maybe someone can tell me just how well (or not) he did.
Kawai Maki (Yoshine Kyoko)
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I have only watched Yoshine in the drama Stay Tuned and I liked her there. She played this airhead character who could be super annoying if the balance was off, yet she came across as likeable. I think she portrayed Maki very well in this movie. Of course, I knew she was Kiokuya going in, so even at the beginning, you could see some of her subtle reactions to the Kiokuya discussions. I really liked her chemistry with Yamada - they felt like they could have been lifelong friends. While she played the annoying little sister part quite well, you could also see the pain she felt when she had to make difficult choices like erasing Nanami’s memory. Throughout the movie, you could sense her regret for what she did to Ryoichi. Her emotions in the final scene were also very raw. While Maki’s characterization was problematic, Yoshine was really good at playing that character and you might even be sympathetic towards her. Also, I feel that her Hiroshima-ben might be more on point? Some people didn’t buy that she was in love with Ryoichi the whole time. I thought the flashbacks made it pretty clear but I’ve also read the book, so there’s that.
In the visual commentary, they were talking about their various acting styles. Yoshine said she carried her emotions with her even after the director shouted cut. So when she was shooting the last scene, she was still crying furiously afterwards. Yamada said she was like an acting monster - she could get right into the emotions even during the table read. It was funny how different she is from Yamada and Renbutsu. They are the flip-the-switch type - when the director yells cut, it was like they woke up from a dream into a different world. She also apologized to Yamada when they were watching the scene where she confessed to selfishly erasing Kyoko’s memory of Ryoichi.😅
Takahara Tomoaki (Sasaki Kuranosuke)
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I have not seen Sasaki’s other projects, so I had no idea what to expect. His Takahara came  across as pretty charming, easy going, and playful, though you could feel his love for his daughter and the hard decision he had to make. He also had a natural chemistry with the other cast and was very believable. While I disagree with what Takahara wanted, Sasaki’s acting as Takahara made sense. I don’t know what more to say. It is probably expected since he is a veteran and is generally well regarded as an actor.
Sawada Kyoko (Renbutsu Misako)
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I have only seen Renbutsu in Hagaren. I liked her character there. I also liked how Yamada decided to break the ice with her back then by asking if she has any friends. (She had more friends than him. 😅) To be honest, there wasn’t much for her to do in this movie, although I think she was believable as the very confused Kyoko. She was apprehensive about Ryoichi in the “after” scenes, who was honestly coming across too strong. I don’t think Ryoichi & Kyoko really had crackling sexual chemistry based on the proposal scene, but they seemed like a cute couple. They were pretty cute together in the behind-the-scenes featurette when they took the “dating photos”. I wish those dates were included in the movie.
Conclusion:
As you can see above, I have some general issues about the script but I think the actors elevated the story. The movie could have been better if it streamlined some of the storylines. Right now, it was trying to go for a deeper message but the stories themselves were a bit too superficial to accomplish that. I suppose the problem was that the original novel was more like an anthology of short stories dealing with memory, so it was hard to create a through line for a movie.
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curious-minx · 3 years
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Bob’s Burgers most reliable holiday  provides another lowkey enjoyable, but messy episode. Whereas the latest Simpsons strikes a really sore vocal node.
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The second holiday episode of Bob’s Burgers’ 11th season, much like the previous Halloween episode, this one also fails to live up to the series’ even higher Thanksgiving standard
 That’s not to say “Diarrhea of a Poopy Kid” is not a good episode, but it does fall into the category of Bob’s Burgers episode I typically respond to the least: Character-based storytelling vignettes. The writing on these segment driven episodes tend to be looser and  playful bending the show’s reality, but much like every time the other Fox family leaves the Springfield plane of reality into a pastiche styled playground for the writers to plug the characters into.
The overall animation and visual-based gags on this episode offers some of the best moments of the season and series in general. Having the Belcher stories revolve around action movie pastiches of 90’s action movie schlock like Air Force Once, Armageddon, and late 80’s Predator  are extremely punny and really grasping hard for satire. The walk to Louise’s Breadator is succinct and makes total sense for Louise’s character to tell this kind of story, whereas Tina drawing inspiration from Air Force One for her story sags the episode down. This episode also has the gall to bring in Gayle, a character that usually elevates all of her episodes nothing much to do until the third and best segment told by Bob. Teddie is also frustratingly nowhere to be seen and Teddie is one of those characters that really only needs a small scene explaining away  his absence like in the episode “Gayle Makin’ Bob Sled,” which Variety and I consider to be among the best of Bob’s Thanksgiving episodes. 
Nitpicks and reminiscing on past glories aside, what’s most impressive about an episode as conceptual and overstuffed as this one, an episode that’s also poopy and gross-out from the very beginning, still manages to pack undeniable heart. Seeing a character as relatable and sad sack-y as Bob Belcher be passionate about his one favorite holiday reminds me of the everlasting and evergreen Ray Bradbury remark about how everyone is capable of writing poetry as long as you ask them to talk about something they are truly passionate about. Seeing how this episode climax revolves around Gene and Bob’s love of food and proves a powerful sentimental moment. Bob’s Burgers sentimentality works because the show’s core is silly absurdism, light and fluffy gross out gags and quirky twee-ness. Introducing the action movie element feels like the series trying to branch out its audience and try to catch some eyeballs of viewers looking for something more like Archer, American Dad, Rick and Morty, or even Treehouse of Horror style genre exercises.  Bob’s Burgers and action comedy feels like putting garlic pesto on cinnamon toast, but Ryan Reynolds doesn’t think so.
Yes, that’s right. The biggest news out of the Bob’s Burgers camp…probably ever…is that the Molyneux sisters, the writers of this very action packed episode, have been hand selected by Mr. Detective “VanWilder” Pickachu himself to be head writers on the upcoming third Deadpool movie. Seeing that we live in a post Russo brothers world and how Dan Harmon was conscripted to punch up Doctor Strange scripts none of this should really surprise me, but I am still very much surprised by this development. The Deadpool 3 creative team and Reynolds is still promising to deliver an R-Rated Comedy, a rating and promise that is very much why Deadpool is the sensation that it is. 
In the current media landscape the only way a big budget R-Rated comedy can get made is if it’s attached to something like a mega superhero sized brand. At this point in time Deadpool is the closest thing kids have to a Mel or Al Brooks and it is what it is. If anything Ryan Reynolds personally choosing the Molyneux sisters for a project like this makes me like Ryan Reynolds a little bit more. And he’s a man I previously had no real feelings or opinions about. The only other thing about Deadpool I know about is that the franchise has developed a particularly shitty reputation in terms of its treatment of main female characters and literally freezing them out of the plot. The future of comedy is being driven by the significant increase of women gaining these kind of writing gigs and it’s a beautiful thing to finally see witness. Especially when a company like Netflix has been really shitty to both of its own female driven comedies: Glow and Tucca and Bertie.
Sigh. I am thankful for all the sad little boys and girls wearing too much or maybe the right amount of eye shadow that will inherit this flaming Earth.
Three and half pear shaped pals out of an Oedipus Rex Complex. 
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Nerds! Nothing but a lousy rotten sniveling dweeb! You dorkus-rex! You body pillow huffing geek get over here and let the Simpsons set some things straight for you: A Comic Book Guy driven episode of the Simpsons is often where the show goes off the rails. The Comic Book Guy marriage episode is was one of those late day Simpsons that feel like a bad piece of dreamed up fan fiction that you found on the cutting room floor. Is the show interested at all with the fact that comics and being nerdy have become as mainstream as the Bible? No? They’re still treating geek culture as some sort of low hanging piñata fruit lousy with cheap references in place of actual jokes? Good! I don’t know why I would ever allow myself to think for a second that the Simpsons would challenge its own status quo 32 seasons in, but I keep coming back. 
What I should really do is back up. The title of this episode is “Three Dreams Denied.” Ah, Dream Denial! That’s exactly what anyone watching an animated sitcom hopes for: dreams being crushed. This isn’t some kiddy Davy and Goliath feel good wholesome fable, this is the Simpsons where characters are given dreams, and those dreams get denied. The next part of the title I want to break down is the fact that there are specifically three dreams that being denied. Three! That’s a comedy number! As long as you have three of anything you’re doing comedy. Plain and simple.
During the Robert Zemeicks arc of the Blank Check podcast Griffin Newman, co-host and comedian extraordinaire and someone I generally admire a lot, has been bringing up the fact that he’s been spending a lot of his Quarantine rewatching the entirety of the Simpsons. By the episode of Used Cars Newman has already gotten past the Movie era and is in the 20th seasons. One observation he made about later day Simpsons is that these episodes have a tendency to end abruptly on a pile of unusable and reality bending plots still in the process of tying themselves up. And there’s no better/worse example of this than this episode. 
Comic Book Guy goes to a comic book convention. Bart becomes a voice actor after befriending the comic book guy’s temporary replacement. Lisa feuds over her saxophone chair in the school orchestra with a new pretty boy voiced by the underwhelming Ben Platt. One of these plots is not like the other. This used to be the signature of a quality Simpsons episode that managed to tweak and divert expectations from the typical A & B sitcom storylines. This episode fundamentally fails to deliver on any of the three storylines and what makes it worse is that it’s an intentional choice. 
Now I know I have spent this review harping on Comic Book Guy, but he’s not even why this episode for me is such an abomination. And it’s not because the cutesy, flimsy Lisa subplot either (although I do find it noxiously amusing that a week after an Yeardely Smith took issue with the Queer Interpretation of Lisa would feature her going moony eyed over a boy voiced by a defiantly queer actor), no, what tips this episode into the territory of the truly terrible for me is the Bart becomes a voice actor subplot. 
The only defining quality of season 32 that I can discern is that the flagrant trolling on behalf of the writers. Can you believe we had three vignette driven episodes of the Simpsons in a row? Can you believe we would have meta reality breaking voice actor related moments back to back? When Lisa Simpson’s voice actor Yeardley Smith voiced the real world character of herself in the previous Podcast based episode it was clumsy and awkward as hell. Having Bart become a voice actor that ends up voicing a character of the opposite gender is the sort of kind of a funny thing that resembles a joke that the latter day Simpsons revel in. The characterization of voice acting work in this episode is downright insulting and explains exactly why this show suffers. 
The character of Phil that serves as the Comic Book Guy’s replacement is a working voice actor. He let’s Bart know this by doing a series of completely basic, broad and unremarkable impersonations that Bart is seemingly impressed by. All you have to do to become a successful voice actor is do a silly voice and you’re golden. Maybe from the perspective of a series as lazy and indulgent as the Simpsons is when it comes to voice acting. The complete denial of Julie Kavner’s deteriorating voice that at this point sounds like gentle elder abuse. There are times when Kavner is downright incomprehensible at times. The other oldest member of the Simpsons voice talent, Harry Shearer was wrongheadedly trying to defend his right to voice Characters of Colors because  in his words, “the job of the voice actor is to play someone who they’re not.” Obviously these words were not spoken by someone that thinks very highly of acting either. There is no one job an actor has to do, because the job  of an actor is always changing from job to job. The character of Phil is not even attributed to anyone! I have spent over thirty minutes getting testy with IMDB search engines and reading another website’s recap and no one can tell me who did the voice of the Voice Acting Character on Simpsons. Lovely.
Much like the Comic Book Guy the Simpsons heart is in bad shape. This is a show whose entire existence seems to be made out of spite. Or to garner enough funds for Matt Groening to prevent him from ever having to serve any prison time for his exploits on the Lolita express. Great, see I’m bringing up the Lolita Express at the end of a Simpsons review. This episode really left me in a bad mood, but thankfully that’s what Bob’s Burgers is for. 
SKIP. The only people that should watch this are people teaching a screenwriting class that need examples of what happens when you break your episode by haphazardly shoving three plots into one episode. If you can’t tie up one story in a satisfying manner then you really shouldn’t be telling a story at all. There’s also one really magnificent visual joke involving Homer and beer tea that is absolutely wasted on this episode.
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Is It Really THAT Bad?
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Pixar had a rough time in the 2010s. While they started out strong with Toy Story 3, films like Cars 2 and Brave damaged their reputation and made audiences worry that maybe the studio wasn’t as good as they used to be. In 2014, this, among many other factors, led to John Lasseter postpone the release of The Good Dinosaur.
Perhaps people should have seen this coming; with few updates and a troubled production that led to the original director being replaced, was it really any shock that within a few months from the release they just couldn’t think of a satisfactory ending? Things would only get worse when six months before the new release it was revealed heavy rewrites caused them to scrap the original cast, scrap several characters, and extensively rewrite the script. None of this inspired much confidence, and eventually the film was released to lukewarm reactions at best and outright scorn at worst.
In the years since, it has garnered a bit of a mixed reception. Some prominent reviewers, such as Schafrilass Productions, hate the film; others, such as The Simpsons aficionado TheRealJims, have a more positive outlook on the stories and themes; others, like Saberspark, have a more mixed opinion, where they don’t like it but do find elements of the production fascinating. Still, the general consensus is that this and Cars 2 are the absolute bottom of Pixar’s barrel and just a rather mediocre film in general. There’s really not much of an in-between; aside from a few who have a more positive opinion, the film is either a harmless mediocre mess, or it is an utter travesty that shows Pixar is old news.
But even films this divisive deserve some kind of analysis, so it’s time to ask: is The Good Dinosaur really THAT bad?
THE GOOD
So I think what works best about this film is that, once it gets going on the actual adventure portion of the film, it does have some fun and creativity. This mostly comes in the form of the requisite one-shot characters any road trip adventure film worth a damn has. The standout characters are the T. rex ranchers; not only is it cool to see T. rex as good guys for a change, entirely unambiguous good guys at that, there are few concepts cooler than TYRANNOSAURUS COWBOYS. And as if to drive this point home, the patriarch of this rancher clan, Butch, is voiced by the living embodiment of the Old West himself, Sam Elliot. There are a few other characters, but the T. rex are the ones that stand out the most.
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I think the parts of the story focusing on Arlo coming to terms with his father’s death are pretty good, all things considered. The story has solid, if not fantastic, emotional beats here and there, though unfortunately a lot of that is undermined by the weak story. Still, credit where credit is due, there are some pretty interesting ideas.
I’ll also say that the backgrounds, the world that this takes place in, looks especially beautiful. However, this does lead into some issues which I’ll cover below.
THE BAD
I think one of the worst aspects of this film is the character models. The animation, usually a strong point is just… really weak here. The character design for Arlo in particular is jarringly cartoony when compared to some of the other dinosaurs in the film. He and his family are really the only major bumps in terms of the animation, but it’s still really bad when the main character we spend a majority of time with looks like this:
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The other dinosaurs do get hit with this to an extent, but Arlo and his family are just especially awkward and cartoonish and just don’t really fit well with the more realistic backgrounds and sets.
The story is a very atypical “A boy and his dog” road trip movie, and there’s just not much done to differentiate this from a million other movies before it. The angle it goes for with a dinosaur being the boy and a human being a dog isn’t really utilized in any interesting ways, and the worldbuilding is generally just bad here, which is an issue with quite a few Pixar movies such as Cars and Onward. There’s literally no reason why the main character should be a dinosaur because it really doesn’t effect the story in any meaningful way.
Compare this to the greatest dinosaur road trip adventure of all time, The Land Before Time. The characters being dinosaurs is pretty essential to the plot, because despite the fact they are given voices and are humanized slightly, they still don’t really do anything a dinosaur couldn’t and they face problems unique to dinosaurs, such as trying to find food or evading predators as they search for the Great Valley. What I’m trying to get at is that you can’t just swap out humans for the characters in The Land Before Time and have the story function the same way. In The Good Dinosaur, being a dinosaur is essentially nothing more than a costume. It would be incredibly easy to swap out Arlo with a human and Spot with a dog and not much about the plot would change. There’s really no good reason for any of these characters to be dinosaurs because nothing particularly interesting is done with the concept. We’re not really shown interesting or unique ways a world run by dinosaurs would function. And unlike Onward, which suffers from a similar issue, the characters we are presented with aren’t really super interesting bar the ranchers.
I guess it really doesn’t help that Pixar has done a lot f these sort of adventure films about odd pairs going out on a journey, going from place to place and encountering colorful characters. Finding Nemo and Onward are probably the closest to this film as they have multiple locales,  but the thing is both of those films do what this movie does far better thanks to more consistent writing and characters. This film just feels really half-hearted and awkward, and sadly I think a lot of that is due to the tumultuous production.
Is It Really THAT Bad?
The Good Dinosaur is, sadly, not a particularly good film. People hold movies like Cars and Brave in contempt among the Pixar filmography, but honestly, this movie is probably the worst of the lot. But here’s the thing: even at their worst, Pixar is at least still watchable. I don’t particularly think this film is amazing, but there is some value to it. TheRealJims honestly makes a fascinating case for this film and its themes, so I don’t think this is a movie that is utterly void of value.
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It’s kind of a shame to think what it might have been if not for all of the trouble behind the scenes. What we’re left with is not a great film, and I certainly wouldn’t call it GOOD either… but it’s not unbearably awful. Its current score is a 6.7 on IMDB, and honestly, I don’t think that’s necessarily too far off. I think a flat 6 would be acceptable for this; again, it’s not a terrible film, but it’s certainly not amazing either. I do agree with a lot of what TheRealJims says more than anything, and find the film rather interesting, but ultimately I do think it is a pretty mediocre movie that falls short of the incredible standard Pixar had set. I really don’t think it’s some harbinger of doom for the studio, but I can see why this movie wouldn’t inspire much hope. There are far, far worse animated movies out there, but there really aren’t worse Pixar films.
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sherlollydramoine · 4 years
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Playing Pretend
This was requested by @aulile 
Rami pretends to hate you, but he’s actually in love with you. Here you go, I hope this is exactly what you had in mind when you sent me the request darling. 
Warnings: alcohol use, sex implied
Word count: 2809
“God he fucking hates me! I swear, I walk into the room and all he does is glare at me! What the fuck did I even do to him? I’ve been nothing but professional. I swear Chels, I have no fucking clue how I’m going to get through the rest of filming with that asshole.” you ranted, out loud to your wonderful assistant Chelsea. 
You had been cast as the love interest in a rom-com with none other than Rami Malek as the leading man. You’d heard nothing but great things about him from some of your peers, and was really looking forward to working with him. You didn’t really know each other, though you’d met several times very briefly at different industry events over the years. 
“I don’t think he really hates you YN, I really don’t. You don’t see how he looks at you when you aren’t looking.” Chelsea responded.
“Well I do see how he looks at me when he is near me. He always looks like he swallowed something bitter, or he just looks angry. I just can’t make sense of any of this. He’s been so kind to me when we’ve met before all of this.”
“I don’t know either, but maybe I can text his assistant to find out what’s up.” 
“You know what, do it, or I will drive myself insane with this shit.”
There was a sudden knock on your trailer door, and you answered it to find a delivery man holding a bouquet of your favorite flowers. You signed for them, and then took them and placed them on the table. Leaving the door open,as your trailer was getting way to stuffy.
“Chels, that’s the third time this week, but the card never says anything. I wonder who keeps sending me these flowers because I am started to get worried that I have a stalker.”
 This time when you went to look for the card you in it’s place a standard sized envelope instead. The envelope and paper were definitely of a high quality stationary, and this time there was a message that was handwritten directly in the center of the paper.
You started to pace, but ending up stopping directly in front of your open door as you begin to read the note out loud.
“I love you. I am who I am because of you. You are every reason, every hope, and every dream I’ve ever had, and no matter what happens to us in the future, every day we are together is the greatest day of my life. I will always love you.”
You gasp, because you recognize the quote. It was from one of your favorite books, a book you’ve read a million times, though it wasn’t a classic by any means; you were a sucker for Nicholas Sparks novels, and this quote was directly from The Notebook.
Your hands start shaking and you nearly drop the paper in your hands. 
“Chels, this was so beautiful, but who? Who keeps sending me the flowers? I don’t recognize the handwriting as anyone I know. I just, I wish this person would reveal themselves to me. Because they’ve been sending me flowers for weeks now and I’m starting to think I have a stalker.”
What you failed to notice was that Rami was standing outside of his trailer, which was directly next to yours leaning against it having a smoke, wearing a dopey smile. He was close enough that he heard the conversation and he’s pretty sure who knows your secret admirer is.
“I don’t know, I am quite curious myself.”
“Have you heard anything back from Rami’s assistant?”
“No. She’s not responding to me, it says the ‘read’ but there has been no reply.”
After a few more minutes, the A.D. was summoning you back to set where you were going to have to deal with him. The hair and makeup people rushed you, to fix any wayward hairs and to touch up some makeup, and just like that you were back to work.
A few more days had passed, working tirelessly and some days what felt like endlessly because there is at least one thing you and Rami had in common, and that is perfection. You would both perform a scene as many times as it took for both of you to feel completely satisfied that it was done to the best of both of your abilities.
It was at the end of such a long day and all you wanted was to go home and sleep when you heard a knock on your door. Chelsea had left earlier to deal with a family emergency, so you answered yourself, wearing nothing but your robe since you had just taken a quick shower.
You almost slammed the door shut when you realized it was Rami on the other side of it.
“Wait!” he hollered, before looking around to make sure no one had heard him.
“What do you want Rami?”
You take in his appearance, his hair is wet because he too obviously has showered and he’s wearing black dress pants, a patterned button down shirt, and black shiny boots.
“I just thought that.. well ..maybe.. Maybe you’d like to have a drink with me tonight?” he asked, as his hand came up to nervously scratch the back of his head.
“Why? I didn’t think you even liked me. I mean you are fine when the cameras are on, but I gotta say dude, you’re kind of a prick to me when the cameras aren’t rolling.” you complained, arms folded across your chest. 
“Look I’m sorry. I just, if you come out with me tonight... I’ll tell you who your secret admirer is.” he said, looking hopeful.
“You know about that? How?” you question, quirking a brow.
“You know it’s a small set, people talk.You get flowers delivered every day now.” he shrugged, while smiling at you conspiratorially.
“Fine, I’ll take the bait, but you better not be lying. Just give me a few minutes to get dressed. Where did you have in mind?”
“My place. I promise no ill intentions, though we can go somewhere else if you prefer. Or some other place that you find to be neutral territory.”
“Yours is fine, I honestly don’t feel like being seen out and about right now.” 
You take your time getting dressed tonight, debating between your favorite well loved jeans or your favorite well loved sundress. Opting for your sun dress and strappy sandals just in case you end up changing your mind and going some place else; stepping in your small bathroom to swipe on some mascara and lip gloss. Tossing your phone into your purse and heading out the door you find Rami leaning against the side of your trailer. 
“You certainly took your time.” he complained, while his eyes raked over your body taking in your appearance.
“Why are you complaining? You wanted to do this, and I just wanted to make sure that I looked somewhat put together in case we change our minds and end up going somewhere else.” 
There was nothing but awkward silence as you walked across the lot to where your cars were parked. 
“Should I follow you?” you asked, unsure of where to proceed with this.
“You could just ride with me and I can call someone later to take you home. That’s if you want to. No pressure.” he assured.
“Fuck it, I’ll ride with you, I’m too tired to drive anyway. Today’s scenes took a lot of me emotionally.”
“I hear you, but this is going to be great. What attracted to you this script?” he gently asked, sounding genuinely curious as to your motivations for taking this project.
He started the car and before you knew it, you were on the freeway headed to his house.
“The writing and the fact that this isn’t just the same ole, same ole rom-com bullshit. The characters have depth and I think the audience is going to be surprised by the way this one turns out. This story is absolutely brilliant, the characters are unpredictable, and so is the story. Sure there is the romance and comedy element of this but it’s not the same shit different movie that most rom-com’s seem to be. I feel incredibly lucky to have been chosen for this role. I seriously thought that I completely bombed the audition.” you laughed out loud, 
You were genuinely happy with that the opportunity to audition for this movie. It was a huge project and working with Rami really has been a dream come true.
“I thought you nailed your audition by the way. I probably shouldn’t tell you this, but I insisted after you left that we not see anyone else. We’ve been there and we both know how it sucks when that happens, but I was absolutely insistant that it be you cast. You just brought something to your character that I hadn’t seen anyone else bring. Every other actress brought the same thing to the table, and they just made eyes at me the whole time. You, you remained in character and played her so well. I had heard from others how dedicated you are to your work, and how thorough. You think so similarly to me and you also chase perfection like I do. You won’t stop until it’s perfect. I think we drive everyone crazy, but they can’t say that this movie won’t be extraordinary when it’s finished.”
You just looked at him wearing a shocked expression. You had no clue that Rami had been responsible for your casting. 
“Wow.” was all you managed to say.
“Wow, is right. You were incredible and I wouldn’t have wanted to work with anyone else but you on this project. The casting people were originally looking at more high profile actresses, but I had suggested to the director that we bring you in. I’m not going to lie here, I’ve wanted to work with you for ages. Watching your performance in The Monster Is Me, it blew me away. You played Gemma so well, and I could relate to her in a way having played Elliot. You really dove deep into the research on D.I.D. for her, and you just.. You made me feel her suffering, confusion, and ever bit of the pain.”
“Jesus. I didn’t realize that you were a fan of that movie. I mean so few people were, I truly believed hardly anyone had seen it.” 
“I did. I went with a good friend of mine to see it and both of us were absolutely stunned into speechlessness at the performance you gave.”
“I… thank you.. You really Rami thank you. That actually means a lot coming from you. I don’t think you have any idea how much your characterization and portrayal of Elliot is what actually motivated me to take this role. You gave the best performance on television with Elliot.”
He laughed out loud this time and it nearly startled you.
“Listen to us, sounding like a couple of nerds; fangirling and fanboying over each other’s work. I wonder if people outside of the industry would say if they could hear this conversation?”
“I don’t know and I don’t care. I guess we both have some amazing performances under our belts and it’s okay to talk about. Trying to have conversations like this with non-industry people always feels like bragging.”
“Yeah it does.”
You were actually truly surprised at how easy conversation was with him. I mean granted you’d mostly only talked about work but your mind never let you forget that he promised to tell you the one thing you’ve been dying to know.
“Welp little darlin’ we’re here.” he says, and you realize that the car had come to a complete stop.
You suddenly felt nervous and you’ve no clue as to why. Following his lead and heading into his house, which was surprisingly modest, and directly into his kitchen. 
“So? What would you like to drink? I’ve several options.”
“Same as you. I like surprises.”
He raised a brow and flashed you a toothy grin. “Tequila it is!”
“Ooooh. I love tequila!” you almost shouted. He jumped in surprise and nearly dropped the bottle in his hand.
“Jesus, YN, you startled me.”
“I noticed and I’m sorry.” you giggled.
He fixed your drinks and then led you to his living room. Where you took a seat on the sofa as he hands you the drink.
“So.. “ he begins, but stops when you seem to become distracted with something. Him slowly taking sips of his drink, obviously waiting for something. 
That’s when you looked over on his coffee table and you see it. Familiar looking paper. Confusion very evident on your face as you look back at him, the paper, and him again.
“Rami?” you ask, holding the sheet of the stationary, staring at him.
“YN?” he counters. The expression on his face almost unreadable, and it almost made you want to burst into tears. You were so confused, and all you wanted was answers. 
“Rami?” you ask again, now out of curiosity and possibly shock. You hold out the paper when you notice the familiar scrawl, ‘One word from you shall silence me forever’ is what was written. 
You dropped the paper and just like last time almost burst into tears. He had quoted Pride and Prejudice this time, your absolute favorite book of all time. Not only had he quoted the book, but he had chosen one of the best lines that Mr. Darcy had in the entirety of the book. You were unaware that he even knew this about you but thinking back, you’d actually been reading that book your first day on set during a break. 
You look back up at him, eyes glistening, “What is it that you are inquiring about? That my one word could silence you from?”
He cleared his throat and reached out to cup your cheek. 
“I love you. Have been in love with you since the day we first met, and I know we don’t know each other well but..” he hesitated. “Will you be my girlfriend? I know this seems kind of a weird way to do this but yes, it’s been me this whole time, I am your secret admirer. Your assistant Chelsea has been most helpful in trying to pull this off.”
“Rami I’m…. I thought you fucking hated me. I seriously, I… yes. Yes I’ll be your girlfriend. I thought I was the only that felt a connection during the audition process, and every part of the process that followed. And also, Chelsea’s dead meat, maybe she should replace me because she is one hell of an actress.”
You move closer to him, and your lips meet for a heated kiss. One deeper and more passionate than your characters have ever shared on screen, and that’s saying a lot considering that you have three sex scenes in the movie. 
Before you know it your bodies were headed towards his bedroom, shedding clothing along the way. 
You only wake up because of an alarm blaring, and you crack an eye open.
“Good morning princess. We have early call times today though I was hoping that you could sleep through my alarm, so that I could make us some coffee before we have to go in. “
“It’s alright, I am a fairly light sleeper.”
“Soooo…..don’t kill Chelsea this morning. I already texted her and told her that the plan worked and you are with me, so she is going to meet you at work in an hour. Let’s keep our fingers crossed that we can beat traffic.”
You almost laugh out loud as you remember that your assistant had been in on this the whole time. You sit up and lean over to give your boyfriend a chaste kiss, which unfortunately turned not so chaste very quickly. Pulling away much to your chagrin, you go in search of your clothes but stop in the doorway.
“Good thing we had some practice last night eh? Since we’ve got sex scene one of three to film today.”
“Oh yes, it’s going to be so sexy. A room that’s hot as hell with about a hundred people watching. Though it would amazing if we actually did have sex on camera. People would be talking about it forever, and it would be immortalized on film.” he teased.
“Rami no!!” you hollered while pulling your dress over your head. “It would be hot though. But do we have the stamina to do that all day?’
“Hahaha, we could save time and just do it reallllllly good the first time.” he smirks.
You can’t help the laughter as you playfully punch his arm.
“Maybe, Rami, maybe.”
@xmxisxforxmaybe @txmel @itsme690 @mrhoemazzello @ramimedley @hazeleyedbeth @lablanchett @free-rami @r-ahh-mi
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klunkcat · 5 years
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Okay, I admit that piercings are a mayor special interest of mine as well as an attraction point in themself, so of course I absolutely loved that Vet Crowley fic but I also want to encourage you to write more, because I would absolutely DIE for Crowley with more piercings. Maybe Aziraphale realizes during their date that this Anthony fellow also has his tongue pierced and he asks about that and it kind of goes from there? I don't know, but if you need a sign to do more with this au, this is it.
(Oh, you’ve done it now my friend, I’m now knee deep in this AU and sinking fast. I have named the snake there is no return.) 
Zira didn’t exactly know what to call it, this…companionship they’d developed. Something more than friendship, he’d hope- hewasn’t exactly well versed in socializing or current trends, but he was fairlycertain the level of heated stares and blushing that occurred between the twoof them was out of the norm for most friends.
It wasn’t enough of course that Crowley was attractive, wellbeyond attractive, in fact. Or that he was witty, quick on his feet, wilyfor all intents and purposes. It wasn’t enough that the mischievous glint inhis eyes when he slid his glasses off made Zira’s heart quicken, or that hissmirk felt a little like basking too close underneath the heat lamps he’d purchasedrecently. It wasn’t even enough that he’d found Crowley to be inescapably kind,too. Selfless in the sort of way that left one breathless; subtle little gestures,like remembering Aziraphale’s favorite food, the temperature he liked his tea bestat, his favorite fonts even (anything with swash characters and discretionaryligatures that were kept within reasonable balance, of course. The newer scriptaddition Bookmania had been a very exciting development in 2011, he’d eventhrown a small soiree for the occasion, which was only objectively correct,thank you).
All of these elements were poised for his demise, certainly,but the absolute kicker of it all had snuck up on him on their fourth outing.He’d already accepted the eventuality of his combustion via those daunting bitsof metal near Crowley’s lower lip, when he’d said something rather snarky andbeen treated to a genuine full-bodied laugh. That in itself was pure gold tothe veins, but Zira had also discovered in that moment, a flash of somethingmetal in Crowley’s open smile.
And oh, but that single flash cultivated the worst addictionhe’d yet to experience so far. At the time, he’d been utterly enraptured, intrigued.Gabriel had often cited Zira’s stubbornness as a negative trait for which he shouldwant for improving and ridding himself of; he was a bit like a dog with a bone,on occasion. Or a man with a growing fascination with mouth related piercings, it seemed.
“Dear boy,” he’d been utterly unable to stop himself,entirely not to blame for the invasiveness of his following inquiry. He’d beendriven to madness, completely outside himself. Scurvy, probably. Or… hysteria,like the old days. “Is that…. A tongue piercing?”
Crowley’s smile slid into something more contained, reserved. As though he’d been rebuked for it before and had developed a practiced and measured out response he knew to deliver in specific doses. Heaven’swe can’t have that, Zira thought nervously in the sort of way one realizes they have casually strolled into a veritable open wound and begun tap dancing with cleats on. 
“And if it is?” Crowley replied,all perfectly calm and relaxed in the sort of way that meant anything but.
Perhaps that would have been the right moment to change thesubject, to practice that social cues lesson Michael had tried to instill himwith, to compliment it nicely and return to their scrumptious brunch. Ofcourse, what Zira intended and what often fell from his lips around Crowley tendedto be two separate things.
“I adore it,” he said, in a rush, and immediately felt hisface flair bright red. He abruptly decided his meal was very and entirelyfascinating, actually. Strawberries, he thought, panicked anddisjointed, what lovely strawberries this crêpe has. Every crêpe should have strawberries, oh, unless there were allergies. Truly terrible, a crêpe only allergy. To imagine such a thing. 
“Oh,” Crowley said, in a very faint voice Zira had neverheard from him. “Um.” It was enough to give Zira the courage to glance upwards,and catch the completely stunned, frozen expression on Crowley’s face. The poordear looked a tad panicked, ears bright red like the first day they’d met, withsomething flickering in the slight part of his lips that touched a bit on theside of awed.
“It’s. Yeah, pierced. Got it done the day after I turnedtwenty seven, actually. Bit of a birthday gift to myself.” 
“Did it hurt?” Zira was entranced, thoroughly, fully. He was gaping, eyes wide, and he could do nothing about it. 
Crowley seemed to fall back into comfort at the question,strangely. “Nah, not even a little. Made of tougher stuff, I am. Went and got myconch done a month later just to prove it.”
Although Zira didn’t know what a conch was in this context, he certainly hadspent a good amount of time staring at the complex snake loop of a piercingstraight through the hollow bit of Crowley’s ear like the snake was twined protectively around it. It was beautiful, truly, anart exhibit in itself. Everything about Crowley was pure art, though. From the crawlingpeek of tattoo’s around the collar of his shirt and the rolled up sleeves he rarely let anyone see, to thearray of curling metal and dark wood surrounding his ears, and of course tothose two glittering bits near his mouth.
The tongue piercing though, that was a whole newfascination. He decided then and there, he’d do everything in his power to getCrowley to laugh that widely and happily more often. Just for a peek, just to scratch Zira’s fascination itch, as it were.
It proved, unfortunately or fortunately he supposed, to befrighteningly easy; making little snarky quips here and there, which of courseonly made the whole thing worse. He invited Crowley over to his tiny apartmentslash book store slash antique store slash book bindery for wine one night, thrilledbeyond measure that Crowley hadn’t so much as hesitated before accepting the invite,and positively and fully, as Anathema liked to say, screwed himself over whenhe’d discovered Crowley was practically a giggly drunk.
If he’d used that information entirely too much, easingsmiles and grins and full on guffaws out of his friend, that was for him toknow.
He told himself firmly it was for curiosity, of course. Notbecause he was completely obsessed with the way Crowley’s nose crinkled up whenhe laughed, or the way his joy just picked Zira up and swept him along with it,or because of the devastatingly handsome column of his neck when he threw hishead back, or—
Oh.
Zira sincerely and deeply hoped they were more than simplyfriends. Otherwise this whole ‘half in love with him’ situation would be dreadfullyawkward.
Maybe it would have been for the best if he’d taken a few stepsback, then. He knew it was what his family would have suggested, although theword family was less here than there and their general suggestions would likelyhave been all over unhelpful to every degree considering their stance on tattoosor piercings on the whole front. He also knew he had a tendency to fret, towait and wait and overthink until opportunities passed, that his nervous naturemeant a lot more no’s than ‘why not’s in the past.
He also knew, with the sort of swelling certainty that feltan awful lot like coming home after a long trip, that when it came to Crowley,it was terrifyingly easy to be decisive. To be brave.
A more stable individual would likely have required two tothree business days to sort out their position on the whole ‘love’ thing, weightheir feelings (intense, fluttery, like eating those fizzy candies that poppedinside ones mouth) and the time they’d known each other (five months and twoweeks, to be exact), and what they were looking from the whole thing (everything,everything). They likely would have formed an action plan of sorts, invitedCrowley out to a nice dinner, dressed up handsomely for the occasion. Maybethey’d have taken a long romantic stroll at twilight around a pond, retire toone of their abodes for a drink, and then expressed their feelings openly andhonestly.
Zira, of course, had lost all sense of stability the momentCrowley and his attractive face and attractive laugh and attractively charming,sweet, careful personality had sauntered into his life. And so, naturally, he’dnot done any of those things.
To be entirely fair, however, the circumstances and generalstate of affairs within the universe appeared to be stacked against any attemptsfor rationality.
“Really, my boy, what exactly do you desire out of all thismess?” Aziraphale sighed, the sound caught funny in his throat and squeaked outa tad more hysterical than he felt. Probably. “You’ll be cold shortly, I shouldthink! Oh, and the night is meant to be a brisk one. I do hope you haven’tdecided to head on an afternoon stroll.” He shifted another couch cushion to noavail, feeling a burst of frustrated panic lodging itself somewhere between histhird and fourth rib.
“Angel!” A voice called, a familiarly attractive voice, anattractive and absolutely heavenly relieving voice.
“Come in! Do shut the door behind you, the last thing weneed is for him to get into the books. There’ll be no chance of finding himthen.”
He heard the muffled sound of shuffling shoes, and the quickclick of a door, before Crowley’s red hair appeared in the doorway. “Oh, thankyou for popping in so quickly, my dear. I’m nearly at my wits end!”
Crowley shrugged off his jacket and rolled up his sleeves, “Bestnot thank me, not till we find the bastard anyways.” He placed his hands on hiships. “Where’d you last see him?”
Zira pushed a hand through his hair, a disaster made onlymore disastrous by the movement. A small part of him that wasn’t frayed to theseams with stress bemoaned the whole thing, he probably looked quite the sight.He’d only pulled on a dress shirt before noticing the empty terrarium and ajar lid,and he was fairly certain a few buttons had sprung loose during his ransackingof the place.
“I’d been working on the books all morning and thought to havea quick bath before getting ready for our, um. Our outing. I saw him just beforehand,all stretched out like always. Even gave him a little ‘hello, how’re you’, sohis mood swing really is quite surprising. A-a firm talking to is on my list,most definitely.”
Crowley quirked a small smile at him, which did everything tosoothe his nerves. “Right, well. Couldn’t possibly be putting up a fuss aboutthe care, here. You spoil him. He’s got to be nearby, it’s too cold outsidebesides. Wouldn’t want to be anywhere like that.”
Aziraphale swallowed and nodded. “I sincerely hope not, poorOscar.”
Crowley stepped closer and rubbed his shoulder reassuringly,with a half-faltered motion Zira couldn’t decipher. “He’s here. Probablysleeping somewhere, the lazy—”
“Crowley,” Zira admonished with a tired giggle. “Youadore that serpent, don’t lie. It’s unbecoming.”
“Me? Lie? Never.” Crowley gave him a crooked smile inresponse, and Zira felt the warmth of it down to his toes. “Okay, I’ll start inthe study. If we don’t find him in half an hour, I brought over some dinner- we’lllure him out.”
They did not find him in half an hour, much to Zira’sdistress. Crowley teased lightly that he should go for the minimalistic stylein the future, so there were less places for Oscar to hide. Zira had to agreeit would be an effective method, not even a snake would find Crowley’s awfulflat couch comfortable. Unfortunately, in their searching, Zira also discovereda gap in one of the floor vents.
“Oh no, he must have gone through the gap! He’ll be stuck inthere, oh, I can’t stand the thought!”
“Hold on, Zira. Snakes are better at climbing than you’regiving our Oscar the credit for, mm? Probably just needs a little encouragement.I’ve got just the thing.”
If anyone had asked Zira how he thought the night their piecesfinally fell together nicely, he certainly would not have said there was anythingstrikingly romantic about placing dead mice near a floor vent in his crowded, unfortunatelydusty flat. In fact, crawling on his hands and knees alongside a Crowley whowas half underneath his terribly old sofa trying to sweet talk a serpent froman even dustier ventilation shaft, was probably not among the first hundredsuggestions he would have made.
However, the look of unbridled joy and pride on Crowley’s facewhen he finally emerged with an equally grey dusted Oscar tucked with absolutecare in his arms, was undoubtedly among Zira’s most treasured and perfect memories.
If he’d been half in love before, he’d gone and jumpedheadfirst off the diving board in the last hour or so.
“Holy hell,” Crowley wiped an arm across his forehead, andcarefully secured the lid on Oscar’s lid. “Glad that’s done with, then. Dinner?”
And it was all truly terrible. The soft golden lighting settingfire to Crowley’s disheveled hair, the dust flecking across his cheeks likestars, the crooked state of his glasses, the rumpled expensive dress shirt thatwould be hell and a half to iron out again. The absolute giddy happiness in Crowley’seyes, like he’d have done anything just to be the one to rescue Zira’s day,like he was so grateful to be given the chance and so proud of succeeding. Itwas far too much.
“If you don’t kiss me, right this instant, I fear I shall bequite cross with you,” Zira huffed.
Crowley stared at him like he’d just plucked stardust fromthe ether, his face was turning a lovely shade of pink. “Oh. Right. Um. Youwill?” Crowley said, voice sounding positively strangled.
“I will! I’ll. I’ll have no choice but to… to run off to thecountryside. Beside myself with longing. I can hardly bear it.” Crowley pressedforward, cautiously, giving Zira every opportunity and then some to back up, tosay no. Zira’s heart was truly going to burst at the careful way Crowleycrowded him against the wall.  
Crowley’s hand pressed against the side of his neck, slowlystill, like he wasn’t sure if Zira was real. Like he wasn’t sure if he couldhave this. This terrible, terrible man, Zira thought, leaning into the touch,meaning absolutely none of it.
His golden eyes were very wide, and Zira stepped impossiblycloser, pressing his own palms flat against Crowley’s chest. He could feel thethump-thump-skip-thumb practically against the pads of his fingertips, somethinglarge and impossible and overwhelming rose in his throat.
“Zira,” Crowley breathed. “You…” He swallowedroughly. “You detest the countryside. All the bugs and things. No sushi outthere. Wouldn’t last a day.”
Zira pouted; his fingers curled against Crowley’s lapels.Crowley’s hand slid carefully backwards, until he was cradling the nape of Zira’sneck. “We’d have to let Oscar out again then, pest control. On a leash, maybe.”
Crowley softened, something a little sad with a lot of overwhelmedhope painting his expression like hues in a sunset. “We?”
Zira couldn’t bear it then, absolutely refused to bear itany longer. This infuriating man with his sarcasm and his piercings and his hipsand his heartbreakingly small sense of just how much of Zira’s heart he’d heldfrom the moment they’d met.
He leaned forward, closing the small gap between them, andkissed Crowley with all the lighting filled adoration he possessed.
Crowley’s hand froze, slackened, and then twisted up intoZira’s hair at the same moment a quiet sigh poured through him. The returningferocity of Crowley’s kiss made his head spin in delicious ways; Zira had onlybeen kissed a handful of times, but not once had it been so enveloping, soready to pull him in and wrap him up and fill him up with relief and excitementand bliss all at once. Then Crowley tilted his head, parted his lips, and Zira feltthat electric touch of that damned tongue piercing and he was quite content notto think any farther.
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eldritchsurveys · 4 years
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665.
1—are you moody in the morning? >> I can be. Sometimes I wake up and my mind immediately dives into rumination mode for some reason, and that kind of ruins the morning for me. It’s like my brain goes “hey, you’re defenseless and groggy, let’s just Fuck You Up On Purpose!” Thanks. 2—have you ever behaved like a stalker? >> No. 3—do you appreciate other people’s opinions? >> I appreciate most opinions. But some opinions, while I respect that a person may have them, and respect their freedom to have them, I just don’t want to hear. 4—does baby corn freak you out? >> No. I don’t really like it, though. 5—can you lie and keep a straight face? >> Probably.
6—have you ever feared for somebody else’s life? >> Maybe a long time ago. 7—do you prefer honesty, even when it hurts? >> I do prefer it, but I also prefer that people not intentionally be hurtful when they’re being honest. There’s a such thing as tact, and I for one know that it takes a bit of practice to learn, but... at least try. 8—have you ever consulted a psychic? >> No. 9—if yes, do you consider yourself a moron? >> Well, that’s fucking rude. 10—does the opposite sex’s bo turn you on? >> No one’s body or its odour turns me on. (Inworlders, don’t interact. This ain’t about y’all.) 11—have you ever stayed in a relationship out of habit? >> Yeah. Not a romantic one, but a lot of friendships formed by circumstance rather than genuine interest. 12—have you ever deliberately not told someone that they had something in their teeth? >> I mean, maybe. I don’t always care enough to make that step. 13—what was the best decision you ever made? >> Buying this absinthe. My brain did try to shame me for it because I’m not made of money, but I refuse to let it win. Life is a fuck and this Sparks Joy, fuck off. 14—do you have a father- or mother- complex? >> Well, yeah, considering I was abandoned by one and emotionally neglected by the other. 15—if you could pick your own pet name, what would it be? >> I don’t know. Most of the pet names I’ve encountered didn’t suit me. Most of them make me feel infantilised and that’s not a comfortable or affection-generating feeling... 16—have you ever masturbated while driving? >> Regular brain: “are you fucking kidding me lmao that’s extremely unsafe” Kink brain: “man I fucking love Crash (1996) dir. David Cronenberg” 17—how do you feel when someone takes the last of something? >> If it’s something I wanted, I hate it, duh. But most of the time they didn’t know I wanted it and didn’t do it to spite me, so I have to keep that in mind. 18—how do you feel when people tell you “bless you” or “gesundheit” when you sneeze? >> I don’t really register it, tbh. I never say it myself, so it doesn’t strike me as a particularly important gesture. I still say “thanks” because that social script is built-in, of course (and because I understand that people follow that social standard to be polite, so I’m acknowledging that). 19—what are you supposed to say when somebody coughs? >> Nothing. Unless you have cough drops on you and you want to offer one, I guess. 20—do you care what’s going on in the world? >> I mean, I’m sometimes interested, but I’m not going to obsess about it. 21—do you pronounce a second “r” in “sherbet” or an “r” in wash? >> No, I don’t have that particular accent. 22—do you throw temper tantrums? >> I have meltdowns, and people who are unfamiliar with neurodivergence / complex trauma response might interpret them as “temper tantrums”. Which is fine to me, because honestly, the internal mechanisms between a toddler having a tantrum and me having a meltdown are actually pretty similar -- we are overwhelmed by things in our environment that we cannot control and we do not have the internal resources to modulate our emotional response. The difference between a toddler and me is that a toddler, raised in a healthy environment, will likely develop those resources organically, over time -- while I am responding abnormally for my age because my development was not healthy. 23—have you ever committed a violent crime because of a video game or rap song? >> No. 24—have you ever actually overheard one of your friends talking shit about you? >> Probably. 25—how many partners is too many? >> That depends on the people involved. It’s not something I should be judging on behalf of anyone else but myself. (I don’t know how many is too many for myself, for the record. Right now, one is enough because I’m still working through a lot of disordered attachment and intimacy issues.) 26—do you know what the “myspace angles” are? >> Yeah, I remember that. 27—is tom still your friend? if yes, why? >> I never kept Tom as a friend. 28—do you have a sponge frog next to your sink? >> A what? Because if this means just... a sponge shaped like a frog, we need to get one ASAP. 29—do you believe that wearing an aluminum foil hat will stop the government from reading your thoughts? >> I mean, I assume the government isn’t reading my thoughts. They don’t need to -- I’m a resident of the Internet, they can just interpret my data like they do with everyone else’s. 30—would you rather have a hook for a hand or a peg leg? >> No. 31—do you tip the carhops at sonic? >> I’ve never interacted with this element of Sonic. I’ve only been to Sonic once, and I was not in a car. I did find the overall interface there to be a bit confusing, ngl. 32—have you gotten drunk specifically to lower your inhibitions? >> Yeah, definitely. 33—how close does someone have to be for you to feel obligated to wait and hold the door for them? >> Pretty close. It’s awkward for both people when someone’s far away from the door and someone else holds the door for them. Like, neither one of us is going to die if you just let the door go and let me get there on my own time. 34—do you give “breaks” to people who don’t deserve them? (i.e. are you a sucker?) >> I used to, and now I’ve flipped to the other end of the spectrum, which isn’t great either. Trying to slide down into the middle -- not a pushover, but not cutting everyone off at the slightest perceived error either. 35—have you ever been walked in on? >> Yeah. 36—honestly, do you think you’re better than everyone? >> No, my problem is the opposite problem. 37—what do you take to a pot luck? >> I don’t know, I’ve never been to a potluck. When we went to the NYE party at Lauren’s place, Sparrow made gumbo and we brought that. My contribution was a 6-pack of pear cider... yeah, I think that’s my thing. I bring the good booze. 38—do you examine the tissue after you blow your nose? >> Yeah, man. It’s gross to me too -- you know, me, with my extreme issues with being organic -- but you can learn a lot from the consistency of the crap that comes out of your body. 39—how do you know when you are an adult? >> Well, as long as we continue to eschew traditional rites of passage, we’ll never know. 40—what is your cure for the hiccups? >> I don’t have a cure, my hiccups go away on their own pretty quickly. But now I’m reminded of that Grey’s Anatomy plot where Meredith’s half-sister’s mother died of the hiccups. (Well, there was more to it than that, but that’s the funny interpretation.)
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Shadowhunters 3x16, Stay With Me -- Review
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Well, it finally happened. Yes, this day, the day that aired Shadowhunters 3x16, Stay With Me will mark the day where the plot for Shadowhunters 3B finally started. Is the plot good? Can't tell yet because even though the plot started, they didn't get very far but hey, at least we got some progress now. It certainly doesn’t make up for the lack of plot all season but at least it’s something. 
I would like to preface this review with saying that I am NOT a huge supporter of this show. I do enjoy certain elements of it but I'm not what would be classified as a devoted fan. For me, Shadowhunters is not a good show and I do get very critical of the show in my reviews. Honestly, for me, I watch the show because 1) I'm too curious not to and 2) I find that this show can be so bad its funny and that's how I reap enjoyment out of it. I am not at all invested in this show or its characters anymore. I'm just watching to see what happens. If you're a die hard fan and you lash out at everyone who has a different opinion than you, you might want to skip these...I'm just saying. My reviews may not be for you. If you do decide to be a total troll, well then pay attention to the below disclaimer. 
This is going to be an honest review of my thoughts and feelings regarding this episode. If you're the kind of Shadowhunters fan where you only want to hear positive things about the show, this is not the place for you. If you decide to stick around and get offended by what is said, then that's on you. I warned you. Just know that if you send me any rude comments or messages, I will 100% ignore you. I find that's the best way to deal with bullies. I work 14 hour days. Do you really think I want to waste my incredibly valuable free time dealing with derogatory comments? Hell no. This review will consist of my honest opinions. Opinions are never right or wrong. I'm not telling YOU how to think and feel. I'm telling you what I, quirky and socially awkward me, think and feel. So please, lets discuss with dignity and respect. If I'm critical about this show, it's only because I want it to get better. There is, in fact, a difference between hating a show and being critical of it. I do not hate Shadowhunters, I am being critical and analyzing the flaws as I would with any other show. There are positives but there are also negatives. It's great if you want to promote positivity with this show (and I encourage you to do so) but that doesn't mean I'm not going to point out the things that are legitimately wrong with it. Also, keep in mind that despite the fact that I do like the books, me being critical of this show has nothing to do with my fondness for the books. I don't really care if the show deviates from the source material as long as the changes are good, it makes sense, and it doesn't create plot holes within the confines of the world the show has created. My problems with this show are problems I would have with any show or book for that matter. I think it's perfectly reasonable to take issue with a show that has plot holes, shoddy world building, and inconsistent characters. There will be spoilers for the books and movie. 
As I said, the plot at last started in this episode, unfortunately this show continues its ongoing trend of having absolutely too much going on with very little going on at the same time. It's extremely difficult too feel anything for these characters when we barely spend any amount of time with any of them before we cut to another group of characters. And then when grand sweeping declarations between characters are made, I'm just like, "wait, how did we get here?" How am I supposed to be invested in any of the characters arcs or relationships when we barely spend any amount of time with any of them? With this episode, I also suffered another episode with some (at the very least) questionable acting choices, to put it nicely. I want to be nice about it but honestly, it feels like the actors aren't even trying. I normally hate criticizing the acting in my reviews but it keeps on popping up in 3B and it's so difficult to just let it slide. Really, all of 3B has been feeling like no one on the cast or crew is trying. Its been really stale and bland performances. It feels like everyone is doing the bare minimum to collect their paycheck. The script was awful, the film production was super bland, and it definitely feels like the actors are "phoning it in". 
You know, while I never exactly liked this show, it was never really a chore to watch it before. While the show is legitimately bad, it used to be kind of fun and I used to enjoy watching the episodes and reviewing it, pointing out parts I found interesting, pointing out parts I found ridiculous. But ever since season 3 started, it's been a real chore to watch this show. I think I can honestly say that I was enjoying Legacies way more than I'm enjoying this show and if any of you have been reading my Legacies reviews, you know exactly how I feel about Legatrash (as I've so affectionately dubbed it). But I am a completionist, so I shall prevail and get through Shadowhunters. 
This the part where I should say The Plot Thickens but this is Shadowhunters so instead we get The Plot Starts
As I said before, not a whole lot actually happened with the plot but at least it looks like something is starting. Jonathon makes a pact with the Seelie Queen to kill Lillith in exchange for her aid. Clary is dealing with lots of anger issues as a result of her bond with Jonathon. Now for the most part in this episode, Kat's acting was pretty stale and bland except for the moment when she yelled her frustrations out at Simon. It had just the right amount of irritation and anger in it followed with the perfect amount of awkwardness following it. This might've been Kat's most believable performance in the entire series so far. But this leads to Clary deciding she needs to get rid of the mark ASAP because she can't stand Jonathon's evilness running through her body. So they concoct this plan where they decide to use Clary's rune-creating powers to summon Lillith and ask Lillith how to remove the mark. They bring Cain in to use the mark as a shield in case Lillith is able to break free of the Malachi Configuration. And when Izzy talks about how she made additions to the Malachi Configuration, first off it was super obvious that the additions was going to be torture but also I was thinking, "how incredibly convenient" and also, "why?" But as they're preparing, for this summoning, Jonathon goes to the hell dimension to see Lillith with the intention of killing her. And what a weird moment to see Jonathon being burned in flames as he's being transported to Edom and Clary is hunched on the ground because she can feel the burning through the bond and Jace is just standing there, not getting down to her level to comfort her or anything, just standing there and watching her. It's weird considering she's supposed to be the love of his life and he's not doing anything to try and get her through the pain. But anyway, Jonathon almost succeeds in killing Lillith, but conveniently enough, right at the moment where he's about to stab her, Lillith is summoned by Clary. I know, right? How incredibly fortuitous and lucky. But after Izzy spends some time torturing Lillith, Lillith spills the beans on the only thing that can break the bond is archangel Michael's sword, Glorious, infused with heavenly fire. There's a little bit of some more torture, honestly its weird considering how the toruture of imprisoned downworlders is a thing happening this season but yet we're seeing Team Good who's suposedly fighting against this torture, so freely torturing Lillith as if its as easy as breathing to them. It's not out of character for the book counterparts but in this context, it's really weird. Jonathon shows up, attempts to kill everyone but Clary uses a portal to send Jonathon to Clave prison. And Cain escapes with Lillith so that's a thing. I"m so not excited about Lillity running around again. She was a bland villain in the books, she was a bland villain in 3A, and she hasn't changed one bit now that she's in 3B. Seriously, who can honestly say that they wanted Lillith back? Izzy then tells them about what she heard from Maryse about their being a project called Heavenly Fire the clave was secretly working on. And I can already tell the show is going to make this way more complicated than it needs to be. 
So once again, I'm left with the thought that I'm not a really big fan of how this plot point of Clary being controlled by the mark through Jonathon's darkness when I think it's far more interesting to have the mark controlling Clary through her own innate darkness. I've said it before, I wish this show would just throw away pure, perfect innocent, delicate little flower Clary and give us dark!Clary where the mark feasts upon her own selfishness and ruthlessness. But the show refuses to acknowledge that Clary is anything but pure and perfect and innocent which is a real shame because dark!Clary is a 100x more interesting. And trust me, the selfishness and ruthlessness is there, the writers just don't want to acknowledge it. I think the writers think that because Clary has that extra angel blood, she should be this pure and innocent creature but my counterargument is: no, she doesn't. Angels aren't always depicted as pure and perfect and innocent creatures. For instance, I love how Supernatural depicts angels. They're soldiers first and foremost and they're willing to sacrifice anything to achieve their task. The plot in this episode would've been so much more interesting if it was less about Jonathon's impulses controlling Clary and more about her own dark impulses controlling her. If you want to keep the same outcome, dark!Clary would make more sense in terms of her telling Jace that he was the one that pulled her back from the brink and allowed her to fight against the mark controlling her. That it was his faith in the good parts of her that called her back. Instead, we got a really cheesy Clace scene where the same line happens but not a whole lot of believability and payoff on it. If we want to go with a different outcome, Clary becomes so controlled by her own darkness and the mark that she portals both her and Jonathon to the apartment and they continue on their adventure for world domination. And then the plot takes over from their. Either way, dark!Clary works far better. If nothing else, it at least gives her a sense of agency, something she really doesn't have currently. 
Is it weird that I'm rooting more for Jonathon in this season than I am Team Good? Seriously, this show hasn't been all that great about humanizing Jonathon but at least he has something resembling a personality as opposed to our heroes where it's become abundantly clear in this season that without Valentine driving the conflict or the political intrigue, none of our main characters have enough personality to really carry the show. When the show focuses on the characters, you really start to see that maybe there's a reason why we don't spend too much time with any particular character or relationship dynamic for more than a couple of minutes in a scene. This could very well possibly be the writers' way of hiding the fact that these characters they've written aren't nearly as rich or deep as they would like their audience to believe. 
And I still maintain that if we're going with this whole role reversal thing with Jace and Clary from City of Lost Souls, then it would be far more interesting to have Jonathon in love with Jace and not Clary. I'm just saying, if you're going to do a role reversal, you might as well go all the way. Seriously, why is Jonathon in love with Clary? What even is the point of it besides Jonathon being evil so of course he falls in love with his sister? The show didn't think incest was okay with Clace so why do they think it's okay here? Thematically, what does it really do for any of the characters?
The fight scene with Jonathon was particularly cringey. Just in general, I've noticed the fight choreography to be particularly bad this season. And I'm always saying, if you have a choreographer doesn't know how to fight with a whip, then please stop using the whip, keep the staff. As someone who finds whip fighting disciplines particularly interesting, and loves how badass book!Izzy is with her whip, it hurts my soul to see the whip in the show be used so ineffectively. 
More Malec Relationship Woes
In which I go back to my old mantra of asking, when is Magnus actually going to put any work into this relationship? Why is Alec always the one having to bend to suit Magnus's needs and not his own. He's always the one having to compromise and work things out and Magnus really doesn't do anything. Like I said in previous season 2 and 3A reviews, there's probably a reason Magnus has had thousands of relationships and I think it has very little to do with him being immortal. 
But the magic Magnus gained from Lorenzo starts to rebel within his own body so Alec has to convince Lorenzo to take the magic away. Which once again, I'm asking myself why is the show doing this? This whole plot is completely pointless. It's literally only here to give Malec something to do this season where instead they could've been working on the whole immortality issue they keep on sweeping underneath the rug, you know, something that might develop their relationship and individual character arcs. It's also really weird that Magnus thinks that without magic, it would make Alec stop loving him since Alec already had that conversation with him a few episodes back and besides, the magic is the whole reason the immortality conflict exists in the first place. Seriously, I don't understand what the writing process is for this show. Do they only take it one episode at a time and treat each episode as a poorly executed one-shot or something? But this whole scare is causing Alec to contemplate marriage to Magnus which I strongly advise against for a few reasons. 1) It's a bad idea to marry someone because you're afraid they might die, fear of your partner's inevitable death isn't going to help you get through all of the highs and lows of marriage. 2) They just decided to move in together, to make that kind of commitment together. Before Alec, has always been more or less a guest in Magnus's apartment. It's a completely different thing to legitimately be co-habiting with where you're always around each other night and day. And 3) As I mentioned before, these two have yet to get through a single conflict that doesn't result in them just sweeping it under the rug and ignoring that it ever existed. Looking at the marriage through the lens of realism, there's no way this marriage could possibly work out or at the very least, it's going to be extremely dysfunctional and not at all healthy. But this is Shadowhunters who hate hanging onto a conflict for more than an episode, so of course I'm sure this'll result in a pure and perfect marriage. 
And whereas all season I've been noticing a lack of chemistry between Matt and Harry, but it was particularly prevalent in this episode's opening scene in that dream sequence. Both actors looked like they were in physical pain in that scene. Just thought I’d make a note of that.
Luke and Maryse Continues to Be a Thing But at Least NYPD: Shadowhunters is Coming to an End
Yup, they're still a thing. And it's just weird that Luke is telling Maryse that he doesn't want her to come visit him in prison anymore when they barely have a relationship to begin with. It's also so weird that he seems to have already been convicted for the pack massacre in a matter of a couple of days. Justice in the American Courts is apparently swift in the Shadowhunters universe. And I also still don't understand why Luke feels like going to prison is redemption for what happened to the pack. As Maryse said, it's dangerous for the inmates around Luke if Luke were to ever lose control. I understand Luke's guilt but I don't understand why he feels like this is the best course of action. But I guess it's all cool because the Praetor Lupus is breaking him out. And honestly, I think the best thing to come out of this whole thing is that we'll no long have to deal with this NYPD plot. It was dumb in Season 1 and it's been continuously dumb throughout the subsequent seasons. The most egregious thing is that it's taken the show this long to get rid of the NYPD angle. 
So it's not a total crap fest on this episode, I actually didn't mind the moment when Izzy and Simon joke about her fear of rats. There was actually some chemistry in that scene. Not enough to sell me on that relationship but I got some Sizzy feels from it. It's still not Sizzy from the books so I don't want it in the show. I still think in the show, Saia is a much better fit but oh well, beggars can't be choosers. 
And speaking of which, in a throwaway line, we learn Maia is spending time with Jordan at the Praetor. Oh joy. She's stuck spending time with her abuser because the show has no idea what to do with her. I remember when the writers said that Maia was going to have a bad-ass character arc this season...I'm still waiting for it. At this point, the only thing that would make me somewhat okay with everything that's happened so far is if it's revealed that Bat is still alive and he and Maia decide to rebuild their pack together. It's still not optimal and it's still a great disservice to her character arc, but at least it's something, you know?
I suppose I'd give this episode a C+. There was plot, but beyond that, I really didn't particularly enjoy this episode. I found multiple aspects of it to be pretty cringy and bland. All in all, I'd say that's pretty much been the status quo for all of season 3, really. Once again we’re seeing that this show has too many characters and they don’t know what to do with 90% of them. For the life of me, I can’t even fathom why this Lillith and Cain thing is necessary. The show doesn’t have the time with this tomfoolery. I thought we were finally getting away from this with the death of Heidi but nope. They just killed her off to make room for undoubtedly another needless subplot. This season has just really been showcasing its lack of direction and that Freeform without a doubt was justified in cancelling it. 
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scrawnydutchman · 6 years
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Incredibles 2 Movie Review (Spoiler Free)
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Pixar has become somewhat infamous for releasing nostalgia pandering sequels in recent years. Cars 2 & 3, Toy Story 4, Finding Dory, Monsters University. These all have their fans to be sure but many people, myself included, wished for more fresh and original ideas from Pixar that made them so great to begin with, rather than friendly reminders of how great they once were. So needless to say I’ve never been horribly interested in a great deal of the Pixar sequels . . . that is except for Incredibles 2. After the third Toy Story I’ve been saying for years that Incredibles is the only Pixar property that actually needs a sequel. Why? Because it’s a premise that’s ripe for continuation. I’m a huge fan of the first Incredibles, so much so that it’s my favorite 3D animated film ever. I loved the family dynamic, the performances, the dialogue, the design, the action. It was cool, slick, charming and heartfelt. It had the stylish edge of a spy thriller with the action of a superhero blockbuster. To put it simply, I wanted to see the Parr family do more superhero AND family antics. So needless to say I was as pumped for this movie as anyone. Did it live up to my expectations? Hell yes it did. It was everything I was hoping to get and improves on a great deal of where the first film left off in fact . . . while also being weaker in some other areas. Let’s break it down.
Story:
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Synopsis: The Parr Family is back in action, continuing their superheroing despite the fact that doing so is still illegal (why the legalization of supers wasn’t  even considered after the family saved the city from Syndrome, I have no idea. But whatever. Just go with it.) Things might change for the better though when Elastigirl gets an offer from a telecommunications expert to share her superhero perspective on why these heroic acts shouldn’t be shunned. While she takes up her new job, Mr. Incredible fights his own battles of being a stay at home dad and realizes it isn’t as easy as he thought it was going to be, especially since Jack Jack demonstrates a new superpower every second. Things for Elastigirl get complicated as a mysterious new villain called Screenslaver makes their appearance. Can she get to the bottom of Screenslaver’s new plan before things turn for the worst?
I mentioned before that Pixar has a known tendency to pander a lot to nostalgia in their sequels, and Incredibles 2 is no exception. There’s more than a few references and repeats of the first film including reused sound effects, shots, settings, cinematography and so on. While these certainly are present and are admittedly a touch distracting at times, make no mistake; this sequel has it’s own identity to it. The concept is interesting, I love the idea of the parents more or less reversing their roles from the first film and all the comedic antics those bring . . .and every scene involving Jack Jack got uproarious laughs in the theater. Admittedly the story has a few noticeable holes and isn’t as tight as the first film, but they weren’t nearly noticeable enough to ruin the experience as a whole. Also the movie kind of falls short in terms of pacing; by the end of it I was honestly kind of amazed that it felt over so quick. For whatever reason the first film felt way more like it took it’s time, despite the fact that there’s only a difference of 3 minutes between each films runtime. 
Characters:
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The characterization of each family member is arguably the Incredibles greatest appeal. It’s so much fun watching this family interact with one another. This time around the family dichotomy ups the anti with a handful of cute little moments between members.  I loved all the interaction between the siblings and the parents and they have constantly great dialogue between each other just as the first film does. Mr. Incredible is probably the most accurately portrayed dad in the history of animated films; he reminds me so much of my dad it’s actually insane.  There’s also one VERY small interaction between Dash and Frozone that I won’t give away but the moment I heard it I completely gushed. Also, while not as developed a villain as Syndrome in terms of motivation, Screenslaver is one hell of a cool bad guy. While Syndrome was a larger than life hamfisted manchild who loved to boast and brag, Screenslaver is a cold and calculated entity whose hidden behind layers and layers of intricate planning and espionage. Again, Screenslaver’s motivations aren’t as fleshed out or as interwoven with the family as Syndrome is but the villain more than makes up for it in aesthetic and outright creep factor. I kind of wish the movie spent more time keeping Screenslaver’s identity shrouded in mystery as that was when the appeal was highest IMHO but the twist is pretty good too. I won’t spoil it obviously, but I thought it was a pretty clever way to spread everything out. I do wish they gave Dash a bit more to do in the film though. While he has a memorable fast paced chase scene in the first movie Dash is unfortunately given next to nothing here; opting instead for more screentime for Jack Jack. In fact, both he and Violet pretty much get the shaft in favour of their baby brother when it comes to what is supposed to be their big action scene. All well. I still enjoyed seeing them again.
Visuals (Animation, Composition, Visual Storytelling, Etc.)
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*this shot of Dash and Jack Jack running through a series of portals is among the most memorable.*
While the script and plot of this sequel all in all recaptures the appeal of the first Incredibles but falls just short in matching it in quality and pacing, one thing it absolutely improves upon this time around is the visuals. This film is gorgeous as one may expect it to be. The textures are beautiful, the use of the trademark Incredibles colour scheme involving shades of orange and red is great. The characters this time around are a bit more on the geometric and cartoony side whereas the first film was more rounded and mushy looking, which is a welcome change IMO. The animation is excellent as predicted. The characters move and behave their own charming ways and the facial expressions in particular are ON POINT in the film. Not to mention the slapstick is a lot better. The big thing where the visuals really shine though is the action. OH MY GOD the action in this film alone is worth price of admission. This is right up there with the first Kung Fu Panda when it comes to fight scenes oozing with creativity. The way characters utilize their powers, the way they interact with their environment, the way the stakes in every fight build as they progress, the way one action follows up another and it’s so clear despite it being so quick. It was simply excellent. The story developers have come up with stuff for this film I would have never thought of in a million years and it’s the coolest damn thing every time. 
One minor thing to note; you may have scene a seizure warning floating around on the internet for a particular scene in this movie. I’m telling you right now; they weren’t kidding. I’m not epileptic but it was quite a bit for me. I’d take the necessary precautions before you see it thinking it’s safe. While the scene in question is definitely a bit of a strain on the eyes, it’s undoubtedly a really cool aesthetic regardless.
Voice Acting Performances:
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Holly Hunter, Craig T. Nelson and Samuel L. Jackson all return for their iconic performances as Elastigirl, Mr. Incredible and Frozone. They all do as great a job as they’ve ever done and haven’t gotten the least bit rusty. Craig T. Nelson still plays a down to earth sentimental father. Holly Hunter still plays an empowered, sharp and quick-on-her-feet mother. Sam Jackson still plays a suave and cool Frozone. Sarah Vowell returns as Violet and gives a great performance for the awkward, pugnacious yet responsible teen. Brad Bird is directing/writing again which means he also returns as Edna Mode; as entertaining as ever. We also get some exceptional performances from voice actors acting as standins for the first films roles. Huck Milner takes the role of Dash this time around and plays it very close to Spencer Fox. Between Dash and Nemo in Finding Dory  Pixar has an uncanny ability for replacing child actors after the first got much too old. The only performance that kind of stands out as not really matching the original is Jonathon Banks as Rick Dicker. I could tell instantly he wasn’t quite the same as the late Bud Luckey (R.I.P). All well; a small gripe in the grand scheme of things. The newcomers such as Catherine Keener and Bob Odenkirk are great. Overall, great performance from everyone.
Sound design (Score, Sound effects, etc.)
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Yet another great element from the first movie that makes a triumphant return: the damn jazzy MUSIC. You can’t tell me you don’t get pumped up just from the killer soundtrack to Incredibles by itself. Those fans of said soundtrack should stick around until after the credits for a special treat in that regard. The sound effects for the film are great too, particularly the original made sounds for each of the superpowers. Not a whole lot else to say; it just nailed it. 
Conclusion:
Fans of the original will not be disappointed. It’s got all the appeal of the first with a great set of original stuff to be it’s own visual experience. It about matches the first in overall quality with it’s superior visuals and action but inferior story and pacing. If you haven’t checked it out already please do. I haven’t had that much fun in the movie theater in quite some time.
Story: 1.5 out of 2 - Above Average
Characters: 1.5 out of 2 -Above Average
Visuals: 2 out of 2 - Excellent
Voice acting performances: 2 out of 2 - Excellent
Sound Design: 2 out of 2 - Excellent
9 out of 10 - A worthy successor!
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prissyhalliwell · 6 years
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Summary: Mr. Gold has been working for the dinner theatre company “The Enchanted Forest” for years, performing the same old shows to the same old crowds every weekend. Nothing has ever changed, until the day Belle French joins the cast to play its princess.
~ Winner of Best Mr. Gold in the 2016 TEA Awards ~
Chapter One I Chapter Two I Chapter Three I Chapter Four I Read on AO3
Chapter Five
Belle felt as if her childhood dream had come true as she posed for yet another photo with fans after the show.
Less than ten years ago, she had been the one asking to have her program signed and standing in line for a picture with cast members. Now she was the one on the receiving end of teenage squealing.
It seemed fitting that everything had come full circle tonight. Now that the performance was over, she realized that it had been part of the reason she’d been so nervous. The first show she had ever attended had been a dress rehearsal just like this one when she had been a student. It had also been the performance where she’d seen Gold onstage for the first time.  
That was the night everything had changed and the acting bug had truly bit her. She’d done a bit of theatre in high school before that, but never considered it as an actual career. Her plan had been to study library science at a big university, preferably somewhere far from her well-meaning, but controlling father. He’d thoroughly approved of her plan to become a librarian - a nice, safe career path for his shy and timid daughter.
That plan had dissolved after she’d seen Gold prowl around the stage as the evil Chancellor. Watching him revel in the villainy of the character, Belle had realized she didn’t just want to read about complicated and layered characters, she wanted to bring them to life.
She’d told Gold before that his performance had inspired her to become an actress, but she’d left out a few details. Like the part where teenage Belle had stood in line for twenty minutes to get her picture taken with him after the show and how she’d gotten woozy from merely standing in his presence.
Of course, he’d been sweet about the whole thing. Had he been as nasty as his character, Belle doubted she would have developed such a crush. But the difference between the devious man on stage and the kind one before her had been the final straw. Her teen heart had fallen head over heels for the older actor then and there.  
They’d taken a photo with her old polaroid camera and she’d told him of her newfound dream of acting. He’d smiled encouragingly as she talked, letting her ramble on for several minutes before signing her program with a message to follow her heart wherever it led.
The phrase had become her mantra through the next several months of school. Through her arguments with her father about her major. Through four years of theatre courses and plays in tiny theatres that barely drew a crowd.
Was it a coincidence that her heart had led her back to where it all began? Or was it fate? Either way, Belle was determined to find out.
One of her biggest worries in getting the job had been meeting Gold again. She’d built him up so much in her mind that she’d braced herself for disappointment when she met him again.
He hadn’t been what she expected. The tongue-tied, awkward man she was getting to know was miles away from the confident, enigmatic actor she had idolized for years. He was still that man onstage, of course. Stepping out into the spotlight seemed to transform him, allow him to be someone different than he was in his day-to-day life. But the real Gold was rather shy, prone to tripping over his words and making terrible jokes. Far from being disappointed, Belle actually preferred this version. He was more relatable, more real to her than the idealized version she’d fantasized about all these years.
Even now, amidst the compliments she was receiving about her dress and performance, she was having trouble keeping her eyes from straying to him. He’d come to her aid when she’d floundered on stage and she didn’t know how she could ever pay him back.
The irony was that it had been the sight of him in his full costume - everything from the fur-lined cloak that billowed behind him to the leather breeches that clung in all the right places - that had caused her brain to short circuit in the first place. If he ever found out how many times she’d imagined a similar scene in her daydreams over the years, he’d be tongue tied for sure.
None of his signature awkwardness existed now though. Like onstage, Gold was in his element with the fans. He had a small horde of teenage girls hanging off his every word. He clearly loved being the center of attention, his smile wide and his gestures much more flamboyant than usual now that he had a riveted audience.
At least she knew she didn’t have to feel silly for her reaction now. The teens crowded around him were clearly just as in awe of him as she had been back then. In hindsight, perhaps she should have realized that seeing him again on stage in full costume would have the same effect on her as it had all those years ago. Gold and she had practiced the scene many times together since she’d started, but the combination of the lights, stage, and costume had magically transported her back to that night when she’d first laid eyes on him.
Yet another reason why theatres shouldn’t do their dress rehearsal in front of a live audience, she thought wryly. They were lucky that she only forgot her lines. If she hadn’t been busy panicking, she might have jumped the Chancellor’s well-dressed bones onstage instead.
“Is there something going on between the Chancellor and the Princess?”
Belle’s full attention snapped back to the three girls she had just taken a photo with. “I’m sorry?”
The girl who had spoken was petite with a shoulder-length brown bob. Her arms were crossed over her chest in a relaxed posture and her smile seemed all too knowing for someone so young.
“I asked if the Chancellor and the Princess had a thing for each other.”
“Uh,” Belle stalled for time to think, acutely aware that she had several pairs of inquiring eyes upon her. “Not to my knowledge. There’s nothing in the script to indicate that.”
“Huh.” The girl seemed to think that over for a moment. “So it’s just you and Gold that are – ”
“Friends,” Belle blurted out before the girl could finish her sentence. “Just friends.”
Despite her wish that they could one day be more than that, Belle wasn’t about to admit that to a high school know-it-all. Unfortunately, the teen’s keen eyesight wasn’t Belle’s biggest problem. If her attraction to Gold had been that obvious from the audience, how in the world could the man himself have missed it?
Her gaze darted over to him again and this time their eyes met. Belle blushed and dropped her gaze immediately, hoping he wouldn’t read anything into it. To her horror, she looked up to see that he had excused himself from his fans and was making his way over to her.
As nervous as she was at the moment, she didn’t miss the way the girls around her straightened, each perking up at the approach of the infamous Evil Chancellor.
“Dear god, he’s gorgeous,” one girl whispered, tugging on her long brown curls excitedly.
The third teen, a blonde with a cheeky grin and an English accent, elbowed her friend with a laugh. “Thirsty much, Jacinda?”
Gold, oblivious to the fervor awaiting him, smiled widely as he joined them. “Good evening, ladies.”
“Evening.”
“Hi.”
“Good indeed.”
Gold’s smile faltered for a second before quickly recovering. “Ladies, do you mind if I borrow my co-star for a moment?”
All three girls giggled, shaking their heads enthusiastically.  
Still in a slight daze from the last few minutes, Belle nodded politely at the girls before gratefully following Gold as he led her away from the group. They ducked into a hallway off of the main room that lead towards the staff rooms, giving them some temporary privacy from the crowd.
“Thank you,” Belle said once they were out of sight, sinking back against the wall with a sigh of relief.
Gold chuckled. “You looked a bit panicked. I figured you could use a break.” He leaned against the wall next to her, gazing at her with amusement.
With only a few inches between them, Belle’s heart began to speed up once again. She immediately scolded herself for reacting in such a way. Was she no better than those lovestruck teenagers she had just been talking to?
From the way her heart was racing, probably not.
“They weren’t horrible,” she finally said. “Just a bit intense. And nosey.”
Standing this close to him, Belle noticed for the first time how good Gold smelled. Though romance novels tended to describe a man’s scent with at least three different descriptors - sandalwood almost always being one of them - Belle didn’t think she could describe Gold’s scent in any more detail than “slightly sweaty, but nice man smell”. With further study perhaps she could get more specific, but she somehow doubted Gold would appreciate her shoving her nose in his personal space and sniffing him up and down like a bloodhound.
Before he could ask any more about the students, Belle hastened to add, “I’m sure you’ve had your share of crazy fans.”
He laughed, but the sound was a bit strained. As comfortable as Gold seemed with the fans, Belle was surprised that someone could unnerve him that much.
“You’d be right about that,” he said. “Most are harmless, but there’s been one or two troublemakers over the years. Unfortunately, there’s not much you can do.” He shook off the thought. “But let’s not talk about that. We should be talking about you on your big night,” he said, gently bumping his shoulder against hers.  
Belle flushed, more at the contact than from his teasing.
“Well, so far you’ve had to rescue me from myself twice.” Belle kept her tone light as she rested her shoulder against his, hoping she wasn’t being too forward. “If it happens a third time, I’m afraid I’m going to have to give you my firstborn in exchange.”
To Belle’s delight, Gold leaned in. “I’m sure we could come up with something less….” he paused, searching for the right word. “...stinky.”
Belle let out a whoop of laughter, clapping her hand over her mouth a moment later. Gold’s eyes sparkled in return.
“Quiet,” he warned. “They might find you.”
She removed her hand. “They’re teenage girls, not hyenas.”
He shrugged. “Could have fooled me.”
Belle didn’t argue, since Gold was more right than he knew. She hoped she hadn’t been that obvious when they first met. As shy as she had been back then, she at least knew she hadn’t been that direct.
Glancing back at the lobby, Belle was torn between continuing her conversation with Gold and knowing that her job required her to return to her guests. She sighed. “I suppose our duty is to return to our paying customers now. Hopefully those horrid girls are gone.”
“I can beat them off with my sword, if you like.”
Belle smothered a chuckle. “No, I think they might enjoy that too much.” At Gold’s confused look, she quickly added, “Never mind. I think I’m fine.”
“You sure?” he asked, concern evident in his expression.
Belle’s insides melted but she managed to stop herself from throwing her arms around him in response. She leaned towards him conspiratorially. “I think I can slay the next few dragons.”
“I know you can, Belle.” His eyes twinkled. “In fact, I’d like to see someone try and stop you once you’ve made up your mind.”
His words oddly choked her up and Belle blinked away a tear before Gold could see. She didn’t want to have to explain what getting his approval meant, because she barely understood it herself. It wasn’t just because Gold was so talented or because she had a crush on him. The Enchanted Forest was the theatre where her dream of acting had begun. Here, more than anywhere, she wanted to prove herself. If she could prove her worth to everyone in the cast, especially the man who had inspired her down this path in the first place, then maybe she’d finally believe she had made the right decision to pursue acting.
She didn’t hold out hope that her dad would ever be convinced or that Maurice would suddenly forget his intense dislike for the theatre that had robbed his daughter of her respectable future. But it would be enough for Belle to know that her choice to become an actress had been brave and not foolhardy, after all.
“Shall we?” she asked, entwining her arm around Gold’s.
“Where my lady leads, I shall follow.”
Belle ducked her head, hoping he didn’t see the goofy smile forming on her face. If she was lucky, he might just mean those words one day.
Author's note: This chapter is dedicated to @b-does-the-write-thing who asked for another chapter of this long neglected fic for her birthday! There's even another chapter ready to go for next week, so look for that update as well!
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aion-rsa · 3 years
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Resident Evil Village Struggles to Turn Horror Gaming into a Blockbuster
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In case you haven’t heard, Resident Evil Village is a hit. The game’s sales figures suggest it could go on to become the best-selling RE title ever, and critics and fans everywhere are ready to name Resident Evil Village one of the best games of 2021, one of the better Resident Evil games, and even one of the best demonstrations of next-gen gaming technology so far.
If you’re looking at Resident Evil Village as a product, it’s hard not to consider the game a success even this early into its lifespan. Capcom is probably pretty happy with the game, and in many of the ways that matter most, they should be happy. Resident Evil Village is a very good game. You could even probably throw out the word “great” in many circles and not have to argue about it.
It’s when you start to ask questions about how Resident Evil Village works as a “horror” game, though, that the conversation surrounding arguably the biggest release of 2021 so far becomes much more complicated.
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Resident Evil Village is a Gameplay Theme Park With a “Horror Land” Section
Coming out of Resident Evil 7, I hoped that its eventual sequel would end up being more like the first 3/4 of the game (which emphasized small sets, limited resources, and often unnerving moments of horror) and less like the last 1/4 of the game (which relied a bit too much on an awkward form of first-person gunplay). Given that the millions of people who played Resident Evil 7 also praised those early parts of the game and were critical of its later sections for roughly those same reasons, there seemed to be a popular belief the next game in the series would advance what worked and address what didn’t.
There’s a degree to which that proved to be true, but one of the most surprising things about Resident Evil Village is how it’s structured. Whereas the previous game’s thematic divide felt like a questionable decision, the divide here is significantly more deliberate. It’s almost like the game is an amusement park divided into four themed “lands” that are connected by a hub area where you get your refreshments and souvenirs.
Two of those lands (Lady Dimitrescu’s castle and Donna Beneviento’s home) are not only clear examples of horror game design but very good examples at that. Hell, Lady Dimitrescu’s castle is practically a throwback to most of RE‘s “trademark” elements (large stalker characters who chase you throughout the area, limited resources, puzzles, and a creepy residential setting). It’s not just a reminder of so many of the things we fell in love with about this franchise over the years but it’s the section of the game that most clearly resembles what many people considered to be the best parts of Resident Evil 7 and the ideas that made them fall in love with the series again.
Donna Beneviento’s home is arguably even more interesting than that. It deprives you of all your weapons and items and makes you solve what turns out to essentially be an elaborate escape room. The designs of its hallways and rare use of “fetus horror” make it a clear callback to P.T., but it feels more like a bigger nod to games like Outlast and Amnesia which emphasized a “defenseless” style of horror at a time when Triple-A horror games were still often relying on more action-based gameplay.
You can’t be talked into liking these sections of the game if you just don’t like them, but as someone who looked forward to the idea of Village expanding on RE 7‘s best horror ideas, these two areas gave me pretty much exactly what I was looking for and more. Dimitrescu’s castle was an engaging bit of survival horror that combined ’90s tropes with modern sensibilities while Beneviento’s house was a genuinely terrifying piece of game design that felt like the team flexing their ability to go toe-to-toe with the most legendary designers in modern horror gaming. These two areas prove that when the Resident Evil team wants to make a great horror game that would be top of its class in any era of horror gaming, they are more than capable of doing so.
So does Resident Evil Village stop trying to scare you beyond those initial sections? Not exactly, but the way that the game divides its campaign into these clearly defined gameplay areas starts to become more pronounced as it abandons more traditional horror ideas in favor of something…different
Resident Evil Village’s Action Sequences Often Struggle to be Scary
It’s tempting to say Resident Evil Village‘s third and fourth main areas (which are ruled over by Salvatore Moreau and Karl Heisenberg) abandon horror in favor of action, but that’s not strictly true. Moreau is an intimidating presence whose fish form forces you to stay on the move, and Heisenberg’s factory is filled with creative monstrosities who often overwhelm you in tight corridors. It’s not like the game suddenly becomes Max Payne.
The problem isn’t that these sections aren’t trying to be scary. The problem is that they struggle to take the best horror elements of the previous sections and incorporate them into the action.
Moreau’s section is often intense, but it’s not very threatening. Moreau’s scripted movements and the relatively linear nature of this area mean that it lacks the constant threat of Dimitrescu’s presence or the overwhelming feeling of dread that looms over Beneviento’s mansion. It’s not quite a scripted QTE section, but it often feels like one in the worst ways.
Heisenberg’s lair is even stranger. At this point, Resident Evil Village just throws waves of werewolves at you and spices things up with battles against mechanical creations. It’s certainly not bad, but the bigger problem here is that you’re likely going to be armed to the teeth at this point in the game and probably not hurting for ammo as the previous two areas were light on enemy encounters. You even pilot a homemade tank in the final battle against Heisenberg! The entire area reminds me of the recent Wolfenstein games. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, but as the conclusion to what came before, it feels like less of a pay-off that builds off your mechanical and emotional investments and more of a detour.
Even though the popular line on Resident Evil Village is that it’s more action-heavy than the previous game, the real thing that stands out is how jarring so much of the action of the later sections is in comparison to the rest of the game. When the game does crank up the action, it does so in such a way that feels almost hostile towards the ideas of “survival horror” and resource management. Because of that, the scares it does throw at you are almost all overcome by a few bullets. The less said about the game’s boss fights (which take the idea of bullet sponges to a frustrating new level), the better.
Resident Evil Village isn’t quite four games in one, but the awkward transition between its main areas can leave you with the feeling you’re dining on a sampler rather than just ordering the one thing you really want.
Village tries to unify these ideas in various ways, but the results are a mixed bag. For instance, I mostly love the game’s use of a “merchant,” but you really only start to feel his value at higher difficulty levels when enemies require more bullets to kill. Otherwise, he’s a save room companion that appears often enough to ensure you rarely feel resource-starved.
I also wanted to love his upgrade system (which requires you to turn in animal meat for permanent boosts and abilities) but the heavily scripted placement and behavior of the game’s animals mean that it rarely felt satisfying to find and kill them, while the easy nature of the game’s combat meant I rarely felt incentivized to go out of my way for help. It’s another example of a good idea that just isn’t incorporated well into the overall experience and ends up standing out in a negative way.
The same is true of the actual village’s “Metroidvania” like design, which gives the impression that it’s filled with unlockable shortcuts and secrets but ultimately proves to be surprisingly linear. Most shortcuts you find are found through the course of natural progression, and only a couple of treasures require you to go out of your way. There again, though, your desire to go out of the way for any of it may be hindered by the game’s generally forgiving nature, which already makes these sometimes disconnected ideas feel even more arbitrary.
It’s tempting to say that the game’s developers didn’t know what kind of game they wanted to make so they just threw a little bit of everything in there, but that’s likely not the case. In fact, I do think that Village‘s team knew exactly what kind of game they wanted to make. It’s just that the game they wanted to make seemingly wasn’t united by the idea of horror but rather a fear over what has happened to horror games of the past.
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Resident Evil Village Reminds Us Horror Games Are Rarely Best Sellers
A 2019 report on the best-selling survival horror games in U.S. history reveals that seven of the top-ten titles are from the Resident Evil franchise and that the top two sellers (Resident Evil 4 and 5) are the ones that utilized more action-heavy design ideas.
The non-Resident Evil games on that list (The Evil Within, Dead Space 2, and Dying Light) may also come as a surprise. Where are beloved and acclaimed horror games like Silent Hill, Amnesia, and Until Dawn? They’re much further down the list than you probably want to hear.
Horror games have traditionally struggled to become blockbuster hits, which is quite surprising when you consider that horror movies have consistently been some of the film industry’s most profitable products. If there’s a difference between the two, it seems that many more people have fun being scared with friends while watching a horror movie than they do when playing video games (often, in the case of horror, by themselves). Indeed, the interactive nature of video games makes them one of the most effective mediums for horror.
When it comes to Resident Evil Village, that seems to have been the “problem.” In a recent interview, Village producer Tsuyoshi Kanda said that the team took it as a “compliment” some players found Resident Evil 7 too scary but noted that “it’s always our goal to create something that anybody can feel comfortable jumping in and playing, so we eased up on the tension curve [in RE Village] relative to Resident Evil 7: Biohazard, so players aren’t in constant fear.”
So as it turns out, the Village team’s apparent decision to not bind all these ideas they had with the thread of scaring the hell out of us at all times was apparently very much intentional. Resident Evil Village isn’t trying to be the scariest game you’ve ever played and failing at doing so; it’s trying to be a horror game that gets more people into horror games.
There’s a degree to which I respect that approach more than I can put into words. I love horror, and I want as many people as possible to love horror. I wouldn’t show someone who’s not a horror fan the scariest movie I can think of to get them into the genre, and I wouldn’t tell someone who is scared of horror games to get over it and play Alien: Isolation. I’d tell them to start on a classic like Bride of Frankenstein, and I’d sooner recommend they play something like Resident Evil Village and be thrilled if they ended up enjoying a game that was still as scary as this one sometimes is.
If Resident Evil Village‘s strong sales inspire more studios to make horror games, then I’ll consider it a success in a way that goes beyond any criticisms I could possibly throw at some of its design decisions. We need more great horror games, and if they happen to look as good as Village and be embraced as widely as this game has been so far, so much the better. I don’t need Resident Evil Village to be the scariest horror game ever, but I would love it if its success allowed some other studio to go out and make that very game.
In many ways, then, Resident Evil Village is a horror blockbuster. Yet, the ways it’s not quite worthy of that title make me worry about the immediate future of the franchise and perhaps the genre.
Resident Evil Village Doesn’t Make it Clear Where Resident Evil Goes From Here
If Resident Evil 7 was about 75% horror and 25% action, I’d say that Village is closer to 50/50. As noted above, though, the bigger talking point is how the game struggles to fold horror into the more action-focused sections and instead makes the dividing line between them a bit bolder than ever.
The dream scenario is that Capcom finds a way to keep that 50/50 style but finds a way to blend those ideas together smoothly enough that you don’t notice the lines that separate them. At the very least, we can hope that Resident Evil 9 doesn’t make its later parts quite so action-heavy and frontload the horror rather than spreading it evenly throughout. It certainly seems counterproductive to suggest that you’re making a game less scary to reach a wider audience but then putting nearly all of your best scares at the front of the game when you’re more likely to dissuade them from continuing or even starting.
Yet, it’s hard not to wonder if the next Resident Evil game will continue the series’ recent evolution by making the horror portion of the experience just a bit smaller. It’s a decision that may not matter much if there were enough notable horror games on the market to pick and choose your preferences, but at a time when it seems Resident Evil is one of the last Triple-A horror survivors, it almost feels like the series is burdened with the task of finding how to make a better horror blockbuster rather than continuing to suggest that “horror games” and “blockbuster games” are forever destined to be two different design concepts and that the latter will continue to eat the former if necessary.
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