I took my stupid walk, did my stupid breathing and vocal exercises, and did my stupid chores. Now I sit in my stupid chair and write my stupid diary.
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leaving comments for myself when im writing fanfiction is so fun because i get to have little correspondences with myself
like so:
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I’m going to hear the archer live in a month I’m going to hear fearless live in a month I’m going to hear the one live in a month I’m going to enchanted live in a month I’m going to hear all too well live in a month im going to hear tis the damn season live in a month I’m going to get my surprise songs live in a month I’m going to hear karma live in a month @shxyerahol
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Body: hey there pal!! okay so there's a few things we need to talk about
Me: ,':/
Body: okay so first things first we do not have a lot of iron in us!! so an intake of meat or certain medicine will be a good choice
Me: yeah actually no I dont eat meat and don't want vitamins
Body:.....okay.....
Me:
Body: uh...your uh, your teeth are very sensitive so don't eat things too hot or too cold or too sweet, okay?
Me: no.
Body:.....alrighty....also no gluten it hurts me a lot and gives you hiccups
Me: but how will I eat pbj sandwiches without bread?
Body: !!! well there's gluten-free bread!! and also gluten is in things other than bread,,,pasta and-
Me: *eats sandwich*
Body: w
Body: what are you doing?
Me: having lunch
Body: but....but I just told you you cant eat that
Me: yeah I know
Body:
Me:
Body: you're going to make this really hard for us
*later*
Me: oooowww my stomach huuurrrts.... :'(((
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{ My Bad }
{ Sorry guys, I forgot how to trim post.
I figured it out!
I will do my best to try and be better about that so the threads don't take up your whole dashboard.
I might also release a few starters from back in the day.
Dean is exceptionally feisty today and needs someone to be feisty back. So I might release some starters. We'll see what the day holds.
Love you guys.
Love always,
~Dean Mun }
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I want to be corrupted into a total sex obsessed freak sooooo bad. I want to be forced to get horny from literally everything. Stick household objects in me. Make me hump shoes and bags and clothes. Make me finger myself anytime I talk on the phone. Make me rub my pussy juices on all of my things. Make me watch porn at work. Make me always keep an earbud in so I can listen to girls getting fucked streamed 24/7. Keep a dildo in me anytime I use my computer. Make me sexualize every nonsexual thing in my life. I want to be completely perverted.
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*Do Not Reblog*
The disabled experience... I don't think anybody can fully understand unless they've gone through it themselves.
We are going to a store, where I know there will be a lot of walking, and it's a Saturday, so there will be a lot of people and it's going to be loud. I pack my noise cancelling headphones, along with the usual water bottle and sunglasses. I put on my compression socks and knee braces. I walk out the door with my rollator, put on my sunglasses, then put my rollator into the trunk of my husband's car. We drive off.
We get to the store. I take the rollator out of the trunk and unfold her. We walk into the store, I take off the sunglasses. We go to the food court for lunch first. I stand in line for a while before I have to sit down on my rollator seat while waiting for my order. I get my food and take it to a disabled friendly table. There's bacon and sour cream in my food. I take my histamine enzyme supplement and lactaid pills. I put on my headphones and turn on my music, something to focus on to reset my already garbled senses as I try to tune out the hustle and bustle all around me, ignoring the usual stares being that weird person over there with the rollator and the headphones as I eat.
We walk through the store. I walk in a steady beat to the music to pace myself. It's hot, and I have to stop for water breaks. I ignore more stares, keep my head high, mindful of my posture while trying to avoid the usual amount of children everywhere who are running around and not watching where they're going, who also stop and stare at me, directly in my path, too.
My husband stands in line at checkout, I find a spot out of the way, sit down on my rollator, and wait for him to pay. We exit the store. I take off my headphones and put them away. The clouds have rolled in so I decided to skip the sunglasses. I fold up the rollator and put her into the trunk. We drive off again.
I forgot my chew toy, so I gnaw on an empty soda bottle to keep myself from chewing my fingers. I get a little car sick from the heat and sensory overload. We arrive at the next store, where I go to the bathroom first thing after having drunk a good deal of water. We look for a new couch. After a dozen times of sitting down and standing up again, a dizziness spell hits. Luckily, we are in a furniture store, where I can actually lie down. And thankfully, there aren't too many people in the store, so it's relatively quiet. I wait for my husband to arrange delivery for the new couch and coffee table we just bought, as well as for my heart rate to return to normal.
As much as I can feel safer from a world that is not at all designed for people like me in this little bubble that I am able to create for myself, it can be a very lonely existence. And sometimes, it alone makes me want to weep.
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Sitting in LabCorp and just shaking my head at the sheer number of people who outright REFUSE to use the sign-in kiosks. Like, sirs and ma’ams, it took me 2 seconds to sign in with a code from my appointment, and when I do walk-in it takes 2 minutes. Just use the kiosks you fucking Karens and Kevins, ain’t nobody got time for shenanigans at 7 in the goddamn morning.
And grandpa over here hovering can sit his ass down too.
Honestly, the more middle of middle age I grow, the more annoyed I get with my own peers. The kids are mostly alright with obvious exceptions, but some of my fellow Xers and out Boomer parents just annoy the piss out of me…
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It's definitely fall outside. There's like this bright sliver of yellow moon. The trees are waving in the wind, it's kind of foggy. Wind is making this howling noise between buildings. I mean all that's missing is like an owl and a few bats. Maybe a zombie or two.
One of my dogs is out there like 'If a monster jumps out of the bushes, you are on your own,' shivering at his own shadow. He's a shepsky, everyone is actually scared of him.
The other is like, 'oh look, someone dropped their dinner on the sidewalk,' That's the chihuahua, who fears nothing and eats everything.
And I'm like hurry up and do your thing already. After much sniffing, trying to eat random crap and general contemplation, we finally are back inside. My scardey cat dog is immensely offended I called him such and that I gave him dog food. He's currently sulking. The other is happy as can be on the couch.
And to top it off, my husband woke up and goes, you went out there like that? And? Who's supposed to comment on my pj pants with coffee cups on them at 2 AM? Don't tempt me, I'll wear them to the grocery store.
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