#a bit different from my usual content but
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A tale as old as time
For @subeddieweek Day 7 | M | 2696 | cw: age gap (about 25-30y difference, Eddie's age is not stated, Steve's aligns with canon) | camboy Eddie, transmasc Eddie, kinda sugar daddy Steve?, modern AU, simp Steve, virgin Eddie, chatfic, pre-anything, gray ace Eddie
"Hawkins High '86? How old is this guy?" Eddie asks himself, his eyebrows raised. There is a letterman in front of him, a gift from one of his top subscribers. Hell, his top subscriber. His number-one fan, who was responsible for about half of his revenue.
He's opened a PO box recently, with no little amount of worry about what kind of stuff he might get. He only gave the address to his top subscribers but he knew that the ones with the most money were usually the most unhinged. He went to the post office with his heart in his throat but all he got was a set of lingerie, a toy, and the letterman he was now holding.
He tried not to think about what kind of people would pay for his content. As long as he was making money he didn't care. But now he got a piece of one of them in his hands. Staring back.
1986.
Meaning the guy must be nearing 60. Double Eddie's age.
He tries to imagine that. An older guy, with wrinkles, maybe a beer belly, a gross old t-shirt, and his hand permanently in his sweats, beating it to his photos.
It was gross. And in a way, alluring.
Though someone with so much money to spend on a camboy must have a well-paying job. Some rich asshole, exploiting others to do the work for him. That's a more likely scenario. He tries not to think about big, rough hands on him when he puts on the jacket and takes pics for Shar.
He edits them a bit before sending them, knowing the guy will get a kick from seeing him in his jacket. The appeal of wearing your boyfriend's letterman eluded him in high school, but being claimed like that gave him a heady feeling. The fact that the guy could be his father apparently worked for him too.
He doesn't put his phone away fast enough and sees the message that pops up.
Shar: So hot. You look like every repressed teen jock's dream
Shar: Definitely like mine
Eddie thinks a moment about his response, channeling the persona he takes on for the camera.
PuppetOfMasters: Would I be your dirty secret?
PuppetOfMasters: Would you fuck me in the locker room behind your girlfriend's back?
Shar: I'd make YOU my girlfriend
Shar: Wait no
Shar: NOT LIKE THAT
Shar: A girlfriend but in a manly way
Eddie snorts.
You're good, he types. I know what you mean, don't worry.
He wouldn't keep around someone who didn't respect him. Besides, he made it clear he's saving for a transition with his Only Fans.
Thank god, Shar types. I respect who you are
Shar: In fact, I spend so much money on you because of it.
Eddie rolls onto his other side, his mood souring. One of those trans fetishists, then. That's fine, as long as he's being respectful and paying... Even if it leaves an unpleasant taste in his mouth.
Ah, a connoisseur! Well, I hope I'm your favorite tranny, then, he jokes. He waits for an answer, but it doesn't come for a long while, so he flips his phone screen down and turns away, hoping for sleep.
A response is waiting for him when he wakes up.
Shar: I guess it sounded that way, but I'm not that kind of pervert. You're the only trans sex worker I follow, but not the only trans person I've sent money to.
Eddie sauntered to the bathroom, not taking his eyes off his phone. He wonders if continuing the conversation is even the right move. He's talked to one too many guys who thought sending him a dick pick was okay after ten minutes of small talk between a content creator and a fan.
But he's kind of curious. When he has money to spare, he sends some change to other trans folks to help out, because he knows how hard it is from his own experience. But why Shar, a seemingly loaded old guy, would spend his money on queers instead of, let's say, starving children?
PuppetOfMasters: So you're just an ally with cash? Or is there more to it? I'm curious.
He goes through his morning routine, washing his face, and brushing his teeth, not expecting Shar to get back to him any time soon. So he's surprised when he picks his phone back up and a response is waiting.
Shar: Long story short, I hope my father is rolling in his grave while I spend his inheritance on people he hated so much.
That's not what Eddie expected at all.
PuppetOfMasters: So I'm a means of rebellion against your bigoted dead father? I'll take that. I hate rich assholes
Shar: Me too
They don't talk for the whole day after that, but when Eddie's done running errands and editing in the evening, he looks back at the letterman hanging on the door of his wardrobe.
How is sending me your letterman an act of rebellion? he asks. Because he's a curious little shit.
The response comes fast like the guy is glued to his Only Fans chat. Gross. Eddie wonders briefly if he's talking with other sex workers there.
Shar: A souvenir of his precious high school fetishized on a queer ssex worker? He'd die if he hadn't already
So it is a fetish thing! Eddie smiles triumphantly at his phone.
Shar: Okay, fine
Shar: Sticking it to my father is just a bonus for you being really hot.
Shar: And I do love seeing you in my letterman, I've jerked off to it three times already
Shar: is that what you wanted to hear?
Eddie grins, rolling on his bed.
PuppetOfMasters: Yes
Shar: So yeah, I'm an old man who peaked in high school, laugh it up
PuppetOfMasters: I'd rather you peaked in me
Shar: Insufferable
Shar: Menace
Shar: Yeah, I'd love that. A man can dream, right?
Eddie bites his lip. How far is too far? The guy seems genuine and after the amount of creeps that's been chatting him up, he thinks his creep radar is quite good. Tentatively, he starts typing.
PuppetOfMasters: I don't know. I think people would like seeing me get railed by an older guy
Shar: An old guy, you mean
Shar: You'd make a video with me?
PuppetOfMasters: I record most of the sex I have, yes
Shar: Huh. I've never seen one before, then
PuppetOfMasters: warm, warmer
Shar: ... There aren't any?
PuppetOfMasters: din ding ding! ya boy is a virgin
Shar: shit
Shar: fuck
Shar: that's so hot
Shar: you'd let me?
PuppetOfMasters: Would I let my best-paying subscriber be my first time on camera? Probably
Not necessarily to be released but he couldn't lose the possibility of such golden content in case it was watchable.
Shar: I'd better keep my spot then. Just in case.
PuppetOfMasters: No worries, you seem the most trustworthy so far anyway.
But as he types it, a new notification appears. Shar sent him a hefty tip on one of his photos.
PuppetOfMasters: That's really not necessary
PuppetOfMasters: But I hope your father is kicking and screaming in his coffin
Shar: I fucking hope so
----
It takes Eddie another day to google Hawkins High's yearbook photos. He'd thought about it before but didn't want to break the bubble of anonymity between himself and his fan. But the thoughts of big hands on his hips, and beard rubbing against his neck, took root in his brain and were tainting his mind.
Not fully in tune with his body and distrustful of others, Eddie has been single for most of his life. And now his stupid horny brain was drooling at the thought of losing his virginity to a grandpa on the internet.
Hoping it would help his thoughts calm down, he looks through the photos from the year 1986, in search of a Harrington. And he finds him.
Steve Harrington. Basketball captain and swim team co-captain. His hairdo was magnificent and his smile was self-confident. Eddie would hate him in high school. Should probably hate him now. So he expands his search further, beyond the Hawkins High memory lane.
He finds one single photo on a LinkedIn profile.
The current Steve Harrington's hair is no less magnificent, just peppered with silver. He wears glasses now, which accentuate the line of his jaw and make his neatly trimmed facial hair pop out. He's wearing a yellow jacket and a white golf, which should be hideous but weirdly, works for him. Eddie doesn't get to see his eyes, unfortunately. The photo looks like a candid photo shoot take-out after someone told him a joke. His head is tilted down, eyes scrunched and lips pulled in a smile, as a bubbling laugh got immortalized on camera.
Eddie shouldn't be finding a sixty-year-old man this endearing.
PuppetOfMasters: I like your LinkedIn photo
PuppetOfMasters: Well, I hope it's you.
PuppetOfMasters: Steve, right?
He can't forget about this for the whole day, not as he budgets his income, and especially not when he records a short video jerking off in the shower. He tries not to look at his phone but it's his only one, so he does while trying to budget in a second one, just for sex work. Maybe then he wouldn't be feeling so insane about not getting a response from a stranger who is an old pervert spending loads of money on him.
He tries to be normal when a chat notification finally pops up.
Shar: If you saw the golf and yellow jacket photo, that's me
Shar: though please don't make me type my full name in here.
no worries, Eddie types back so fast he should be embarrassed. It's a good photo.
Shar: Thanks. My best friend took it
PuppetOfMasters: Your friend has a good eye
Shar: I'll let her know
Shar: I'm surprised it took you this long to search me up
Eddie's surprised too. Usually, his curiosity would take over him sooner.
PuppetOfMasters: I tried not to pry. But I had to in case we were gonna meet up one day
Shar: So you were serious?
Shar: I've been wondering if you sweet-talk all your followers like that
PuppetOfMasters: Only the ones that don't send me dick pics
Shar: I knew holding back would pay off
Eddie snorts at his phone.
Though I might need one before we meet up, he types. Gotta know what I'm working with
Shar: Right. Of course
Shar: So how would that work?
Eddie hasn't thought about it this far.
PuppetOfMasters: I need to read about OF's policy on collabs. Never had to before, since I work solo. Would probably have to hire you, well, sign a commission/gig contract or something like that. So it's all legal and shit.
Shar, Steve, doesn't answer for a long while, and it might be the end of his devirginizing journey. Well, if the guy doesn't want to make this legal, put his name on some paperwork, then he isn't trustworthy, and that's the end of it.
It's half an hour later and Eddie's bitten all his nails off trying not to follow up with any messages and focus on anything else when an answer finally comes.
Shar: Sorry my friend was bothering me
Shar: this sounds more complicated than I anticipated. So I would be like, a co-creator, then?
PuppetOfMasters: Precisely
Shar: Holy shit okay
Shar: Thought I'd be you know, less involved
Though you could hit it and quit it, huh? Eddie scrunched his nose. What was he getting himself into? Gods.
Shar: If that's what you wanted I'd take it
Eddie shouldn't be blushing over this one. It's like he's throwing the man scraps and he's licking them up.
PuppetOfMasters: Simp
Shar: I am what I am
Shar: With that said, I'm willing to make it work. Do all the paperwork you need
PuppetOfMasters: Doing paperwork just to fuck me? so romantic
Shar: I suck at paperwork so my friend would be doing it anyway
Shar: If that's okay
PuppetOfMasters: I think it's best if someone looks it over, yeah
Eddie hesitates for a moment.
PuppetOfMasters: That friend doesn't happen to be your wife?
Fuck no, comes the immediate response
Shar: I'm perpetually single and she's as gay as they come.
PuppetOfMasters: Good. Wouldn't want to be the other girl
Shar: If I had the chance you'd be the only one
PuppetOfMasters: Jesus.
Eddie squeezes his legs together unconsciously.
PuppetOfMasters: Stop sweet talking me, I've already agreed to fuck
Shar: But we haven't signed anything yet. Even then, I'll keep sweet-talking you. It's what you deserve.
For the first time, Eddie thinks he might not survive their meeting. And not because of the possible killer scenario. Thankfully, Steve gets back to business talk.
Shar: How would this work, legal stuff aside? Do you script this?
PuppetOfMasters: Do I look like I script shit?
Shar: I'm not the one with Only Fans
PuppetOfMasters: Fair. I think we could just set up cameras and do whatever we feel like. Then decide together if the footage will be released or not.
Shar: Sounds reasonable
Shar:When would you want to do this?
When?
Eddie hasn't thought that far. In fact, he felt like he hadn't been thinking for the past couple of days.
I'm the sole god of my schedule so I'm open to anything, he types evasively.
Shar: I have some time off next month, could fly to wherever you need me
Next month seemed close. Extremely close. Or maybe it wasn't? He never worked with anyone before. Hell, he didn't even have that many friends to meet up with.
Next month works I guess, he answers despite his nerves.
Shar: Wanna face time before we start the legal work?
His nerves escalate, making his mouth dry. He reminds himself he's done this before, he's on camera all the time.
PuppetOfMasters: Like, right now?
Shar: Yeah?
PuppetOfMasters: Ok, give me five minutes.
Eddie shoots up, checks himself in the mirror, and finds a good angle for his phone to set up. He lowkey hopes Steve picks up with his dick in the frame so Eddie can block him with a clear conscience and forget about the whole thing. When six minutes from his last message pass, he hits 'call'.
"Hi," Eddie squeaks when the video connects. Steve Harrington's arms are in the frame, crossed on the desk, and toned where he's leaning on them.
"Hi," he greets him with a dazzling smile.
It is the guy from the photo, so at least he's not being catfished. And he has none of the creepy simp energy Eddie feared. He's just... a guy. It's both a relief and a disappointment.
"Well?" the guy asks.
"Well, what?" Eddie frowns.
"Are you disappointed? Am I too old?"
Eddie looks at him properly. His hair is lighter on the sides, but not grey yet, and the video quality doesn't make any wrinkles stand out to him. Maybe some worry lines, crow's feet if he squints. He looks like he keeps in shape, too. Eddie wouldn't call him old. Mature, maybe. A DILF slowly transforming into a Silver Fox.
"You look fine. Good. You look good. Attractive," Eddie fumbles with his words and barely stops himself from facepalming. This is why he mostly texts.
Steve smirks at him. And holy shit, a dude twice his age smirking at him shouldn't be doing things to his body.
"You sure? You're not gonna block me after we hang up, are you?"
Eddie shakes his head.
"I stand by our plans. You're passing my creep radar so far, but uh..." He scratches his cheek nervously. "I'd like to keep in touch in case, you know. A red flag pops up. I hope you get it."
Steve nods, his expression growing serious.
"Absolutely. We're strangers, after all."
"Yeah." Eddie nods, relieved. It would give him ample time and opportunities to back out.
On the screen, Steve leans more on his arms, closer to the camera.
"So I think dick assessment is next on the checklist?"
Eddie might not even survive video calls with this guy, after all.
#subeddieweek#sub eddie week#sub eddie munson#cj x subeddieweek#mine#steddie#cw: age gap#camboy au#modern au#transmasc eddie munson#this story got away from me as soon as it started#i just wanted to write some online domming but no#some mmmm older guy touching me???? kinda hot#b u t NO
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PLSPLSPLSPLSPLS CAN YOU MAKE A FIC WHERE WE EDGE SUB!HUSBAND! FRANCIS AND THEN FUCK HIM DUMB AFTER BECAUSE HE'S BEEN SUCH A GOOD BOY AND MAYBE OVERSTIM HIM PLS PLS
sub! husband! francis mosses x dom!doppelganger! gn! reader
summary: punishing your puppy husband (pt. 1 here)
wc: 1.3k
content warning: nsfw, established relationship, anal, cock can be read as a strap, dom/sub dynamics, nipple play, overstimulation, humping against objects, public-ish sex, francis getting through the window, hand job, dirty talk, doggy francis, collaring
author's note: hi my lovelies, i'm so sorry for the long hiatus, finals season had be worn out! i'm back now, but will be posting slower than usual :( happy to still lots of engagement on my page, u guys are the sweetest!! anyways thanks for the ask anon:) hope u guys enjoy this one!! not proof read, minors please dni !!
when he heard the door click, he felt anticipation welling up in his stomach.
you creaked the door open, looking down at the mess your husband left. the pillows were messily arranged on the couch, probably soaked in his cum and his clothes were abandoned on its armrests.
there sat your needy husband, sitting on the carpet in front of the door. he was sat flat on the ground, knees spread, balls rubbing against the floor. his fat cock was barely contained in his tight black panties and his neck was collared with a long, red leash.
he didn't need any instruction on what to wear or what position to be in while he anticipated your arrival, he already knew.
"hi honey," you cooed, walking up to him with disinterested, ruffling his hair. "what with the mess, hm?" you looked around, acting as if you didn't notice the mess before.
he whimpered, hips grinding against the carpet like a puppy. "o-oh, 'm sorry, dovie. just wanted to get ready for you," he pouted, looking up at your with his big, doe eyes.
he looked so pretty when he looked up at you, so desperately wanting you to compliment how he looked or how sexy he looked sitting on the floor, awaiting your next command. anything to elicit praise would make him literally cum on the spot.
"yeah, i see that. but surely 15 minutes is enough time to clean up around here, right?" you tilt his chin up, smiling down at him menacingly. he mirrored your nod, looking more distressed by the minute.
you let go of his chin to his dismay, bending down to pick up his leash. "c'mon pup, you know the drill," you tugged at his leash, pulling him forward. he fell on his hands and knees, crawling behind you.
you brought him to the bedroom, leading him to the window. "on your feet," you instructed as he quickly followed suit. he was expecting a spanking, overstimulation until he was soaking the sheets white, but this was different.
"up against the window, francie. hands up here," you guided him, his cock flushed against the window, as he peered over at the city.
from this view, everyone looked so small. even so, it was still embarrassing for francis to be naked in front of a window. "what're we doing, dovie?" francis bit his lip, looking back at you with an antsy look.
"well since you love letting everyone know how much of a slut you are, i thought maybe i should indulge you a bit more," you pressed a kiss against his ear, placing your chin on his shoulder.
"begging so desperately for me to play with you over the phone while i was on the job," you whispered, dragging your fingers down to his v-line. "you wanted someone to watch you play with yourself, right puppy?"
he winced at the coolness of your fingers when you gripped the base of his cock. his legs were shaking, the little people feeling much closer than they actually were. "n-no, i was just...hnngh..." he breathlessly moaned.
this was turning him on a lot more than he thought. he was in the comfort of his own home, but still felt like he was display for the entire city. watching the way you played with his cock, stroking slowly.
"are you gonna be more honest with me, honey?" you murmured, your palm rolling over the tip of his cock. he jolted, feeling himself get close. he's been close, long before you stepped through the door, awaiting the punishment in store for him.
"uh-huh...nghh...i-i'll be...g-gughh, good," he was basically gurgling on his saliva, drool dripping down his lips. "f-fugh, fuck, just the tip, hngh?" he questioned, feeling his cheek smush against the glass.
you switched to stroking, pulling back at his foreskin. his eyes rolled back at the action. "such a perfect boy, hm?" you praised, toying with his slit with your thumb. "should i be more honest with you too, honey?"
he jutted against your hand, feeling his hips stutter. "m-mhm! please, dovie?" he huffed, his fingertips greasing up the window.
"honestly, i'm not gonna stop until this entire window stained in cum," you grabbed his chin, forcing him to look forward. "'n if someone sees you from their apartment, i want you to be a good boy and give them a big smile."
there was an apartment adjacent to yours, relatively far but still visible to see people through their windows. francis felt his cock throb at your confession, nodding rapidly at your wishes.
your hands were stroking at the perfect speed for him to cum, but he knew better than that. a drop of cum leaking out meant a day without cock and quite frankly, he could not survive even a second without a cock buried in his stupidly tight hole.
"pretty panties today, honey. these new?" you tugged at the band, letting them snap back onto his pale skin. he jumped, accidentally pumping himself into your fist like a flesh light.
once he started, he couldn't stop. his hips were fucking into your fist, he felt himself getting close. "oooOOGH...'s so, fuck, hnngh," his hands balled into fists, eyes closed to imagine you doing more than just jerking his leaky dick.
you released your hold on his cock, his nearly bursting tip brushing against the glass. "tryna be cute, huh?" you chuckled, completely removing yourself from him. "looked like you real close, huh?"
"unghh...dovie, 's so, so hot. 'm so f-full of cum," he whined, smearing his pre-cum against the window. his mouth hung open, panting like a dog, leaning his cheek against the window once more.
"someone's not listening, hm?" you rubbed the bulge of your cock against his nearly exposed ass. he mewled out a moan, tears spilling out of his eyes. he was so close.
you had continuously lead him close to an orgasm, only to let go of him and let him cry his little heart out from the lack of release. his eyebrows would furrow and his lip with jut out in frustration.
and every time he'd complain, you'd reach your hands up to his nipples to turn him into a crying, moaning mess.
you'd pinch and pull at them. waving your fingers over them making him puff his chest out. you'd flick at them quickly, watching as he squirmed in your hold.
"yeah, that's what i thought," you laughed, giving them one final poke.
and when you finally deemed him worthy of a good orgasm, you'd give him so many until he was physically out of cum.
"ahhhnngghhh! 's t-too much, dovie!" he exclaimed, eye crossed, head fuzzy. "y-your cock 's soo deep, hngh, feels good, oooNGH!" he threw his head back when your hit his prostate, making him cum.
your window was more than stained, cum dripping down to your carpeted floors. "too much? didn't you beg for this, puppy?" you tugged at his collar, hand gripping onto his waist.
you thrusted deeply into him, grunting at the impact. "s-someones, hic, watchin' me, dovie, mnngh..." he mumbled, making eye contact with the guy who was jerking off to the sight of your messy husband, cum splattered all over his tummy.
"remember what i told you, honey? give 'em a show," you urged him, fingers prodding at his puffy nub, tugging them towards the window. his tongue stuck out, a smile gracing his lips.
he looked so slutty. tears and drools rolling down his face, cock grinding against the cum-stained glass and his bright, pink nipples pressing up against the window.
your perfect slut.
"say cheese, dovie," you cooed, thrusting into him one last time, cum spilling into his hole. it filled him so well that it was dripping down his inner sides, legs shaking.
your fingers slowly rubbed his nipples, as he twitched from his nth orgasm, huffing wildly. he swallowed, throat dry from all his moaning. he got into position, legs spread, ass pressed deeper against your pelvis with your cock nestled in him. his eyes trailed to the guy who watched you breed him for the past hour.
"cheeeese." he smiled.
#francis mosses#francis mosses x reader#sub francis mosses#tnmn milkman#milkman#tnmn#thats not my neighbor#that's not my neighbour#that's not my neighbor#x reader#ncrescent asks
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I Left My Heart in San Francisco (John Brady x OC)
Summary: John's heart feels a thousand miles and just as many memories away in Stalag Luft III.
Note: Title comes from the song, of course (you don’t have to listen to it while reading, but I listened to it while writing this). Do not interact if you're under 18, terf or radfem, or post thinspo/ED content.
Word count: 1.7k
Warnings: Fluff and angst, mostly introspective. Somewhat non-linear narrative, I guess.
“I won’t get any good if I don’t practice,” John insisted.
Woody smiled, her green eyes sparkling. “Alright, but you watch that pipe of yours. If I smell burning hair—“
He grinned, taking his pipe out of his mouth. “You won’t, sweetheart, I promise.”
Woody braided her hair first thing in the morning, after hastily raking her fingers through it, tugging out any knots that formed overnight. By the heat of the afternoon, enough hair would come loose and stick to her sweaty skin that she’d have to redo her handiwork, already knowing to anticipate the black streaks of grease she’d have to scrub out of it at the end of each day.
Sometimes Holly would be around to give her an intricate and sturdy French braid, able to withstand sweat and hard work. But John had never braided hair before he asked to do hers one evening, and then with increasing frequency as time went on, desperately needing something to lose himself in.
She sat between his legs, still and patient as he ran his fingers through her wavy hair. He parted it in two sections, letting the waterfall of blonde flow down one of her shoulders while he gathered the rest of her hair, silken to the touch compared to the standard blankets and bedsheets they were issued.
A shiver ran down her spine when his fingers gently brushed the nape of her neck.
“Sorry,” he mumbled.
“You’re fine, honey.” Her voice was soft, almost a low purr that echoed in his ears. He couldn’t remember another time when she called him honey. Usually just Johnny, which sounded wrong coming from other people, even jokingly, since it became hers, but he wasn’t sure how to tell her he liked honey too.
He carefully layered one thick strand of hair over the other until he finished a braid on one side. Looked good, but he knew at a glance he could do better. Woody braided her hair for utility, not just to look pretty, which was a bonus in his opinion, but not her priority.
He puffed on his pipe, shaking his head before setting it aside. “They’re not even. I’m gonna try again.”
“Go ahead, Johnny.”
John stroked her hair, thinking about how he wished they had met under different—better circumstances, where she wasn’t under constant threat of losing him. He used to figure that there was a proper way to get to a woman’s heart, the way god intended, or so he’d been told: meet a nice young lady, ask her father for permission to take her out on a date, get to know each other, bring her home on time. Rinse and repeat while trying not to get too handsy before getting a ring involved.
Then the war happened.
Then Woody happened, who probably wouldn’t have described herself as a nice young lady in the first place. No father to ask permission to take her out on a date. He wasn’t quite sure they actually saved anything for marriage (besides the having kids part, thankfully). He figured god would be flexible, all things considered.
“Everything okay?” she asked.
“There’s a knot,” he mumbled, brows furrowed in concentration as he carefully pulled at strands of hair to free them from each other.
“When I was a kid, if I had a really bad knot I couldn’t get out myself, I’d just cut it with some kitchen scissors. My hair probably looked awful.”
He almost instinctively asked why she didn’t ask her mom to brush it out, but felt the slightest bit of rage burn in his chest when he caught himself and remembered. “I care enough about you to do this right.”
“You’re also pretty good with your hands.”
“I’m glad you think so.”
“I know so,” she said, “and thank you for always being attentive.”
“Are we still talking about your hair?”
“Oh, of course.”
He snickered, working on braiding her hair again. “Of course.”
Neither of them spoke of the future very much, but he knew he wanted one with her. Just wasn’t sure how to go about the discussion without scaring her off, if she’d even be open to settling down. Settling. The word weighed heavy in his mind. While Woody claimed no nostalgia for her native city, a sad fondness laced her voice when she spoke of it, of the excitement and freedom San Francisco had offered her when she needed those things most. Sometimes John wondered if Ithaca would be enough, if he would be enough when all was said and done.
He swallowed roughly. “Take a look and tell me what you think. Be as brutally honest as you need to be. I can take it.”
Woody half-turned to him, an amused smile spreading across her face. Made him feel like he was being let in on a secret the way her smile sometimes did. “You could make my hair look like a bird’s nest and I wouldn’t tell you.” She gave him a quick peck on the cheek before getting up. He followed, almost nervous as she inspected her appearance in the small mirror sitting nearby. She beamed at her reflection, turning excitedly to him. “Johnny, it’s perfect.”
She stood on her toes to kiss him, deep and real, the kind that made any lingering doubts dissolve. Her lips were soft, as if she put on lip balm before he got there. Everything about her was soft, except for her hands, always rough and calloused, but something would be wrong if he felt a smooth palm cradling his jaw, or gliding across the expanse of his shoulders, down his back to cling to him. But he was clothed. Or he thought he was. Lost himself for a moment before he found the sound of her voice again.
“Before I forget—” She slipped her hand into one of her pockets. “Here, I want you to have this. I don’t really have any other photos of me, but I wrote a little note on the back of it for you,” she said. Her cheeks flushed, eyes flicking away from him for a moment. “Just so, um, you know it’s yours.”
He smiled at being handed the photo, a little shadowy and out of focus, but her nevertheless. To Johnny, all my love and more, your sweetheart, Woody. She had drawn a little heart next to his name, Xs and Os after hers. “You look beautiful. Thank you, sweetheart.” He kissed her forehead, the tip of his nose brushing against her skin. “I’ll keep it with me.”
And he did. All the way to Stalag Luft III. Looked at the photo and tried to remember the feeling of her hair between his fingers.
He nearly tore Hambone a new one for taking the photo from his hands without asking, not that he would have let him touch it in the first place even if he had. While far from salacious, having other eyes besides his own on Woody’s photo felt almost sacrilegious. After all, he kept it in the same pocket as the St. Christopher card his mother had given him before he left for basic, its laminated corners curled from his incessant toying with it for reassurance. He hardly looked at it since they bailed. Patron saint of travelers. Some good St. Chris did him.
Buck stepped in and got John his photo back before the situation could escalate further. But the cat was out of the bag. As if it even mattered then, anyway. He did take some pride in everyone’s shock at him and Woody managing to keep their relationship under wraps for nearly four months.
He didn’t expect it to come up again, but he wasn’t exactly expecting Bucky to be alive either. In the midst of Bucky's bittersweet reunion with the other members of the 100th who’d been taken prisoner by the Germans, it was mentioned among the updates everyone was clamoring to give him after he relayed what he could muster of how he survived and ended up there.
Hardly relevant, but Bucky fixated on it after John let one small detail slip out.
“You and Woody? How the hell did I not know this?” Bucky asked.
“No one knew, except for Holly,” he said.
“Holly knew?”
“It wasn’t my idea, but Woody tells her everything. Told her about us the night you two made the bet on that baseball game.”
“That was back in June!" Bucky exclaimed, a strange combination of disbelief and slight betrayal that felt almost out of place compared to everything else going on. "She’s known for four months and didn't tell me?”
“Woody swore her to secrecy or something.”
Bucky shook his head. “You sly dog. Under everyone’s noses…” Clapped him proudly on the shoulder. “Good on you, buddy.”
John smiled. “Thanks, Bucky.”
“Don’t expect any details,” Murph mumbled.
“I’m not telling any of you about my sex life.”
“But there was one?” Bucky asked.
He sighed, resisting the urge to glare at his friend, who up until a few hours prior, he wasn’t even sure was still alive. “We didn’t sneak around for four months just to hold hands.”
Even if that was all they’d done, his relationship with Woody wouldn’t have been any less important to him. Still, it was nice to have actual experiences to pull from, build fantasies that could get him through some of the lonelier nights when he wished he were with her, just about anywhere in the world but Stalag Luft III. The four months that were all theirs became his lifeline.
Four months. Maybe that was long enough for him to ask her to marry him. After writing to his family, that’d be his first order of business. Woody already had his heart, so he’d promise her everything else on top of that he could think of. Let her point anywhere on a map and take her there on a month-long honeymoon. Move all the way out to San Francisco with her. If she said ‘no’ or sent the letter back unopened, at least he could say he tried.
He laid back on his bunk that night, doing his best to ignore the shouting outside. Like the night guards did it on purpose to keep them exhausted. Closed his eyes. Kept her photo pressed against his chest. Tried to remember what her hair felt like between his fingers. Silk compared to the threadbare blankets the Germans gave them for the rapidly approaching winter.
“I won’t get any good if I don’t practice,” he insisted.
She smiled, her green eyes sparkling. “Alright, but you watch that pipe of yours. If I smell burning hair—“
He grinned, taking his pipe out of his mouth. “You won’t, sweetheart, I promise.”
#john brady x oc#john brady#masters of the air x oc#masters of the air#mota x oc#mota#mota fanfic#hbo war#hbo war fanfic#hbo war x oc#ch: woody
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Idly, from the crack of his ajar bedroom door, Cub watched Scar through gentle eyes, the other sitting at the couch, ever so slightly slumped as he watched the news, or maybe watch was a strong word, because it looked a bit more like he was sleeping. An awake Scar was never so still, so relaxed, the rise and fall of his shoulders never so slow. An awake Scar typically knew when he was being watched, a strong internal sense, and he would turn around, arm draped over the back of the sofa with a lazy smile, and Cub might greet him, or he might just shut the door, the observation not nearly as fun when the other knew he was there. Cub smiled, basking in the opportunity to simply look without being known. Scar’s hair was a certified mess, more than it usually was, the funny little cowlick at the back of his head completely out of control. Not that Scar ever tried very hard to tame it anyway. But today he didn’t have to try at all, because today he was here, and there were no cameras, no scrutiny. Well, maybe there was a little scrutiny, but Grian wasn’t home right now. Just Cub. Just Cub.
Scar’s legs were in the shop today, routine maintenance and things, but instead of spending the day in town as he typically did on these types of off days, he asked to spend it here, to just hang out, relax. Take off the mask and not think at all. And who would Cub be to deny him?
There was something so deeply satisfying seeing him here, out of uniform. He had arrived in it out of necessity; very few people had no legs and wheelchairs decked out in HotGuy merchandise, but Scar had changed once inside, visibly reveling in the luxury of being Here. In a place with people he trusted. No mask. No legs. No uniform. Being.. Scar. Given the nuclear identity crises Scar had been experiencing lately, this was nothing short of the ultimate freedom. And what an honor to be able to provide that, to be trusted enough that even a man so deeply insecure of his place in the world could find it in himself to just relax around you. To be himself. To fall asleep on the sofa without the fear of sharp edges.
Cub ducked out of his room, tip-toeing over to shut off the news. He didn’t care to hear it, and didn’t think it was too good for Scar either, not today. The scene reimagined to his liking, Cub slunk back to his room then walked from it again, normally, and draped his arms around Scar’s neck, humming. Scar roused, and Cub got the pleasure of seeing him blink away sleep.
“Ello,” Scar mumbled, leaning back to hit Cub’s chest with his head, and Cub closed his eyes, a small smile forming across his lips (maybe. Sometimes when he thought he was smiling, he didn’t look any different at all, his mind’s eye only playing tricks on his physical sense of self).
“Hi. You tired?”
Scar gave the question a moment of thought, endearingly, trying to push back further into the couch, like the barrier between them was a great frustration. Cub didn’t make any move to be closer, internally amused. Scar sighed, “Not really. Just got a bit bored, closed my eyes. Was still listening.”
Cub very much doubted that. He didn’t think Scar was lying or anything, just that he simply didn’t know how asleep he really was. No point addressing it though. “That’s good. I was thinking about you, y’know.” Cub snaked around the side of the couch, settling himself half on top of Scar, probably with far less grace than he was imagining. Whatever the case, Scar didn’t seem to care, looking more delighted than anything to have Cub so close.
“Were you now,” Scar returned the gently flirtatious tone, always one for a little bit of a game. It was intense sometimes, looking Scar in the eyes, but there was such a deep contentment there today, and Cub found himself unable to tear his eyes away. “Well, you know I can’t help myself. I have to ask.”
Cub chuckled, burrowing a bit closer to rest his head in the crook of Scar’s neck. “Was thinking about the night we were together, just walking around on the streets. Talking. That kiss, it was a nice thing. It was a good night, just what I needed, really.”
Scar glowed, the little words having more of an affect on him than they ought to have on anyone, but then again, that was just Scar. So easy to please, his joy written for all to see in the bright lines of his face. He’d probably ride the high of those words for the rest of the evening, and Cub would be lying if it didn’t make him feel a little warm. How incredible it was to have that effect on a person. Though Scar, ever greedy a man, could never help but push, “Anything else?”
“Well..” Cub trailed, knowing Scar would hang off every word, “I was thinking about what we talked about. How you wanted someone to take care of you.” Cub let a hand wander to Scar’s thigh, hoping to get the message across, but not entirely confident this would be enough.
The reaction was adorably delayed, the gears behind Scar’s eyes visibly turning before his cheeks flushed, a nervous hand brushing through his hair, “Did I say that?”
Cub shrugged, “No idea. But I remember thinking it.” Cub grinned when Scar startled in his arms, making an attempt to backpedal, but no actual words left Scar’s mouth, and Cub snickered against his shoulder. “Don’t pass out on me now.”
“You’re the one trying to kill me!”
“Oh come now, I haven’t said anything at all. I just have a lot to give tonight, if you want it. All you have to do is ask.” Cub tried to smile, but at this point looking Scar in the eye was really getting overwhelming, so he stopped, letting the silence linger. “And I think it’s funny. That you like my teeth. I think it’s cute. Wanna know how much truth there really was to that little snippet you gave me before,” Cub opened his mouth, just a little, just enough to let the blunt edges graze the base of Scar’s neck, but he failed to anticipate the jolt of Scar’s shoulders at the touch, knocking him square in the face.
“Cuuuub!” Scar wailed, missing the soft grunt of surprise as Cub reeled backwards, as well as the slight movement to adjust his glasses.
“I’ll stop, I’ll stop.”
“No!” The word dropped just like the jolt of Scar’s shoulders, perfectly involuntary, cheeks flushed and eyes wide. Scar looked sheepish for a moment, and he was the one who broke eye contact this time, beautiful in his quiet, “Just.. don’t bite?”
Cub smiled, and he was sure he did this time. “I can do that.” But he didn’t get to move before Scar swallowed him in a kiss, full and happy and too excited to hold it in, so perfectly Scar. Something like love warped Cub’s heart, not quite, that would come later, a latent realization sitting alone in bed, eyes wide, heart beating faster, unequivocally, irreconcilably in love. For now though, the warmth in his chest was well enough, the joy and hope that Scar had gifted him with open arms for all these weeks.. months now, wasn’t it? It didn’t matter, really. Cub wanted to give back. To show a kind of appreciation that was a little more explicit, to let Scar know just how much he cared, since Cub knew well enough it wasn’t always easy to tell. (Cub knew that Scar knew already, he knew Cub cared, but as far as romance goes, this was his own fantasy.)
there is more of this like. A lot more. But things ramp up be much less sfw and then not at all even a little sfw and it is like. It is not about the sex really story wise the focus is very romance and silly goofy but that doesn’t go here so if you want to read 7k words of absolute Nonsense you can find that on my ao3
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Let me be the one to ask. How did you come up with this Queerplatonic Frans concept? What drew you into making this?
Aww thank you for asking such a delicious question, pal! Hope you're ready to listen to my 1 am rambles XD
Alright so, to be completely honest...I actually don't truly know how Romance works to execute it myself 😬
Haha yup, sadly, the concept of Romance and Romantic Attraction didn't naturally come to me my whole life and I had a hard time understanding them. (Skill issue, amiright?) So I learned about them through fiction. And even then, my understanding of Romance was a little bit different from what it's usually is (spoiler: it wasn't actually Romance, the word I needed was "Queerplatonic").
I've drawn ship arts before I started drawing Frans and let me tell you, almost all of them were 2 characters just standing next to each other, no hugs, no kisses. Maybe they'll look at each other with fondness. And I was like "hell yeah, I've achieved Romance 😌" pfft.
My 2020 Frans works were where my ship art skills got improved. But you can still see that they aren't explicitly romantic (like, the first time I drew a Frans forehead kiss was for a request). Whatever, I was drawing stuffs about my fav lil guys and I was happy... and yet a tiny part of me wasn't feeling it, like it felt...odd to call them romantic. All these shippy art and I still felt uncomfortable to draw something extremely Romantic. (...this kinda sounds similar to a comphet kind of situation, you get what I'm saying?)
2 years later, I learned about the term "queerplatonic" and just like that, everything made sense =o Now THAT'S the kind of relationship I've been thinking about all these years and it felt magical. Suddenly, with this new knowledge, drawing shippy art felt more comfortable for me, cozy even. Cuz now, the "romance" I'm making is like something a little special for me.
And then I thought "what if I...👀" I grabbed Frisk and Sans like figurines and used them to make my own little ideas of a queerplatonic relationship as they were the perfect materials to work with for me.
I've actually been busying myself with thinking up ideas for them a year before I revealed it to my mutuals, even long before I revealed it publicly 😅
Still, my Roommate Banter AU Frans is still classic romantic. I've only been making funny lil contents of them but I swear! They're secretly crushing on each other, there's romance underneath! I just suck at Romance 😭
So yeah, TL:DR, I don't completely understand romance so I did what I felt comfortable and did actually get the most, approach a ship with a queerplatonic lens.
Tho I'm still learning about Romance cuz there're other ships I'd love to draw shippy art for XD
Anyways, yeah thank you to anyone who read all of this and thank you dear anon for indulging me with your ask <3 Have a lovely day/night ^^
#asks#thank you for the ask!#frans#ah it felt so good to talk about this#even if it looks like i'm just talking into the void#but we all know that void is full of many wonderful things hehe#also i'm so tired and i should sleep but i couldn't so here i am#it's past 2 am by the time i'm done typing cuz i kept getting distracted#again thank you if you read all of this including the tags#imma pass out now#good nighttt#i hope there aren't typos and grammar mistakes above#aroace struggles amirite?#qpr frans
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Hi I really liked your generic Ruby concept that you did a while ago so I was wondering if you could do the same but for sapphire’s if it isn’t a bother thank you (also sorry if I’ve requested this before I have the memory of a goldfish 🥲)
I can give my thoughts, sure! Just a warning though... I'm rusty on Steven Universe content.
General Ruby Concept Here
Yandere! Generic Sapphire(s) Concept
(FT. Ruby Guards)
Pairing: Platonic/Romantic
Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Overprotective behavior, Stalking, Manipulation, She uses her Rubies against you, Dubious/Forced companionship/relationship.
Sapphires are different from Rubies, obviously (In Steven Universe).
Sapphires are an entirely different caste, often used to predict the future for other Gems.
While Rubies are soldiers, Sapphires are aristocratic.
They are important and rare Gems and aren't typically seen in groups.
Rubies are naturally found in groups due to their fusion abilities as soldiers.
Sapphires are usually singular, so you'd most likely have one Sapphire as a yandere... which is easier.
Sapphires probably aren't too bad as yanderes.
They aren't physically strong without fusion, but they do have future vision and ice powers.
You could meet your yandere in the same way as your Ruby(s).
You're a Homeworld gem... you're a human and found her... or you met her in Little Homeworld.
I personally like the idea of you finding a Sapphire who came to Earth and befriending her.
Sapphires are usually seen with Ruby Guards, perhaps she was separated from her guards and you found her?
Either way, I imagine your Sapphire is curious and very patient.
She originally is hesitant to communicate with you, but as you get to know her she's floating by your side.
The ice powers and future vision no doubt come in handy.
Imagine when your Sapphire gets attached she attempts to use her future vision to predict how your bond will go.
However, with future vision I imagine Sapphires would be more lucid.
They know better than any other Gem the toxicity of their attraction... allowing them to predict how to make it better or when to back off.
As a result, an attached Sapphire is aware of what their obsession could cause.
Or at the very least... somewhat aware.
Another cool thing to add is a Sapphire can alert other Gems to their own obsession.
For the most part your Sapphire would use such an ability to keep you safe from danger and predict how to win you over.
Honestly, alone Sapphires aren't much of a problem.
However, imagine if your Sapphire had Ruby Guards.
Perhaps you promised to help her find her guards?
You could be a human or Gem, eventually your Sapphire feels comfortable around you.
She feels a strong connection with you... although due to being a Gem she isn't quite sure what it is yet.
(Especially if you're human/a Gem from Earth and she's from Homeworld)
By the time you do manage to locate her guards, she's a bit too attached.
Her Rubies originally treat you with hostility, after all they've been lost here for what seems like weeks.
If they aren't her guards, they're at least old friends.
Yet your Sapphire reassures them that you're no threat... leading to the Rubies to calm a bit.
Your Sapphire even says you helped her... she considers you an ally and friend!
However... I feel a yandere Sapphire comes with an issue despite how tame they'd be.
Their guards will do anything to keep their assignment happy... leading to you dealing with Rubies ANYWAYS.
Your Sapphire tries to reassure you when you notice Rubies following you around.
They're protecting the both of you!
The main yandere is still your Sapphire, she's the one who has a bond with you after all.
It's just that she has guards now enabling her.
She says it's all for your protection, that she's trying to make you happy.
If you tried to separate yourself from your Sapphire, she could send her Rubies after you or freeze you.
She hates the idea of harming you, but she's doing anything she can to chase a future in which you're both happy.
The good thing is, sometimes she leaves you to have your space.
She's lucid enough to give you your space.
Sapphire would most likely learn affectionate gestures from you.
Remember, affection isn't common in Gem culture.
Unlike Rubies, she isn't fully for the idea of fusing if you can't.
But she does know how to learn hugs, kisses, cuddling, etc....
She just hopes it'll be able to make you both happy.
She still believes the perfect future for the both of you is one where you're both happy...
The issue is... what actions will bring you both to that point... and will it hurt?
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synopsis. you, suguru, and a window left open— or, the soothing lullaby of springtime.
a/n. very much self-indulgent and probably with a lot of mistakes (be patient please, i’ll correct it first thing in the morning!) but i really needed to write a moment of peace after a troubling week…….. also, i’ve been very sick and this is my first attempt at writing after a long time so i apologize if it’s not that good TT — 🐣
it was comforting, watching the thin but sturdy branches of the plum tree stretching to the glittering dots adorning the sky. regulus's fiery mane moving delicately as the evening breeze's note echoed in the air. waking up every sleeping blossom, cradling in a motherly embrace each of its sons and daughters that were yet to be awakened.
spring. where your eyes landed you could spot significant signs of its long awaited arrival, from the night sky to the grass steadily growing inches in your neighborhood's garden. it made a smile bloom on your lips, the same way pink and whiteish buds littered every branch of the plum trees.
you traced the astronomical asterism one more time, drawing an imaginary line that connected the three luminous stars of the evenings to come. an invisible triangle that linked arcturus with spica, just to finish on the other side of the sky and meet with the last component of the brightly lit trio: regulus. many people (and internet. mostly internet) would argue with power points at hand and scientific theories that the white star of denebola was a better choice than regulus. more suited to close the imaginary triangle, resulting in a nearly equilateral one at the price of brightness.
but you didn't care. that place belonged to regulus because that is what you saw the first time you used a telescope. and no one could've made you change your mind, of that you were sure. stubborn just as much over something that wasn't even real but dear to you.
your chest danced slightly— a breathy chuckle finding its way out as you eventually lifted your growing aching arms from the windowsill.
(you know a person who would've found that stubborness of yours endearing.)
a yawn parted your lips and the door cracked open. it had been a long day— a long week even, for both of you of course. but this time around it had been particularly rough for suguru. he was the one to come home with an aching back and tired limbs, though it was not that hard to see how fatigue latched on his body. a voracious snake that found a comfortable nest in between his chest, refusing to leave him alone.
it was the main reason as to why dinner was made a little earlier today and the dishes were left on the counter to dry for the night. you will put them back in the respective cupboard tomorrow as the first thing in the morning. for tonight, you decided to prioritize your rest.
it was also the reason why suguru took a longer-than-usual shower and got out of it only now. the noticeable difference in his shoulders made relief bloom in your chest— no more slumped, or a tad bit droopy but instead relieved, back to their natural stance as if the weight holding them down had been lifted. a minuscule change that probably would have gone unnoticed by others.
he walked toward the bed, phone steady in one hand while typing an answer to satoru and ieiri. it was easy to tell who suguru was writing to. you noticed overtime that when he texted the two of them he wiggled his nose a lot and (if gojo ended up saying something stupid or sending weird memes) his frown lines became more wrinkled, like a child trying to comprehend the meaning of a new word. it was adorable.
you followed his steps, raising the duvets and moving away the excessive amount of pillows on your side of the bed. suguru did the same on his own half.
"satoru giving you a hard time?" a breathy chuckle. he didn't answer, simply shaking his head in resignation and placing the phone on his bedside table before collapsing on the bed with a content exhale. you took that as a sign to join him.
"just satoru being satoru," you didn't fail to notice how his eyes softened when looking at you, "i think yuji should stop teaching him about internet slangs. he's been doing the deez nuts thing for two weeks already"
though there were traces of hopelessness heavily lingering on his words, you couldn't help but notice something else— something that you recognized immediately after as fondness. a familiar feeling that he reserved only for the few people he truly cared about. you didn't even try to stop the laughter bubbling in your chest.
(suguru watched as your eyes crinkled in amusement. the sound of your laughter lulling him to further relieve- soothing away every stubborn trace of stress still sitting heavy in his bones.
spring waltzed from the opened window, attracted by your presence. he couldn't blame it; you were the spring he eagerly looked forward to seeing each day.)
when your laugh eventually dimmed, his phone lightened up with new messages to read. suguru retrieved it and you did the same with yours, wordlessly shifting in a comfortable lull and a familiar embrace. a satisfied hum broke momentarily the blanket of silence falling on the room when you felt his free arm around your shoulders. fingers playing absentmindedly with the strands of your hair, messily splayed on the pillow.
you nuzzled closer to his chest, your cheek now resting on the thin fabric of his white shirt he had been recently using to sleep with. phone clasped in one of your hands while you scrolled mindlessly through the feed of your favorite social media.
and it's gentle. serene. a moment of shared complicity that carried the veiled scent of blossoming flowers and stardust. a needed addition to the relationship that brought somehow a welcomed sense of mundanity.
when suguru eventually fell asleep first, his chin resting on top of your head, you didn't have it in yourself to get up and close the window. too pleasant, too cozy to even entertain the thought of leaving it for a few seconds. you will close it tomorrow, first thing in the morning. as of tonight, you'll let yourself be cradled by the sweet lullaby happening outside that very same window.
(suguru's arms never felt so much like home before.)
#jujutsu kaisen#geto suguru#geto suguru x reader#geto x reader#jjk x reader#jjk#anime x reader#geto suguru x y/n#geto x y/n#geto suguru x you#geto x you#jjk geto#geto fluff#suguru geto x reader#jujutsu geto#jujutsu kaisen suguru#suguru geto x y/n#suguru fluff#getou suguru x reader#getou suguru x you#getou x reader#i really should stop writing at almost 3 in the morning……….. it’s becoming unbearable lmao#anyway#i miss my beautiful wife geto suguru so much#i’m not particularly proud about this one because i feel like i could’ve done better#like. really better#it seems like i can’t write anything but fluff for this man
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He’s a phantom
A lil gift for my partner who is in the midst of their spooky season Danny Phantom rewatch. 💚 I didn’t really watch this show as a kid but I definitely understand what everyone likes about it!
#danny phantom#gif#my art#i am not an animator sorry if its choppy#a bit different from my usual content but
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he’s like a beedle or somethin
#shep arts#content smp#csmp#arathain#mason arathain#i have not had the spoons to properly draw recently between school and being mentally ill soo yeah#if you get any art from me it’ll either be ibis doodles or like messy colored sketches like this#i gave them a pole hammer causw it was the first weapon i was given when i asked friends what weapon I should draw them with#its not too different from my usual armor design for them I did plan to change everything up more but ehhhh whatever the coloring was fun#i completely forgot i was gonna render the like wingy bits on their armor like more solid like it was metal worked to look like bug wings#only remembered that after I had done all the coloring and was shading so by then I was not going to bother with it like eh who cares#I dont care enough to fix it at least#the colors & some design things are based on green june beetles btw cause I love those silly guys…#I love bugs they’re so funky (<- cannot be in the same room as a bug because I’m terrified of almost all of them)
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Random but it feels important to say but I just watched this tiktok and this guy said that someone empathizing with another person by telling them a story about how they experienced the same thing is a red flag and, I quote, “love how you’re making things about yourself”, and I just really need y’all to understand that there is a difference between someone deflecting from what you’re going through and trying to put attention on themselves and a neurodivergent person trying to prove to you that yes they can personally relate to you and empathize with what you’re going through because of a similar experience. That’s not trying to “make things about themselves”, that’s genuinely trying to make you feel seen and like you have someone who is there and understands at least to some degree besties.
#[ooc]#it’s particularly a big thing with adhd I know and personally I do this a lot#I also purposefully write Tory as doing this a lot because it is such a prevalent adhd trait#neurodivergent people have different ways of relating to other people than neurotypicals do and it’s not a bad thing or a red flag#you just have to understand that it’s not coming from a place of self importance it’s meant as an attempt to validate your own experience#sometimes it’s easier for neurodivergent people to relate via tangible experiences#especially when we don’t feel like our own abstract thoughts and how we relate to our own emotions make sense to anyone else#yes there are people that do try to make everything about themselves but again there is a big difference#and you can usually tell because those people will keep continuously derailing and trying to stop you talking about yourself#when usually when it's someone trying to relate to you their own addition is meant to be just that: an addition#the intention at least in my experience is to give you space to talk and also make you feel seen and validate you#instead of just going 'sucks for you' 80% of the time bc that feels ???? can't explain it. it feels unproductive at least to my brain.#and yeah sometimes things can come across as awkward or it can be easy to take it the wrong way because again#it's not the 'normal' social convention#so just understand that if you're interacting with someone that's neurodivergent and they do this#9/10 times it's with the best intentions only and it's someone with a different brain chemistry trying to be a good listener/friend#because talking about real experiences is often more feasible than relating our emotions to *your* emotions without some connecting thread#okay now back to your regularly schedule chaotic karate content that tiktok just set me off a little bit lmao
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had some thoughts about my semi-oc ideas for the in universe parody of xxxholic (and a few other series) that one of the heart render protagonists will be into and i went back and forth on the hair situation w the doumeki expy (the douwata equivalent r yuri for funsies) and despite being a huge fan of mirroring imagery and giving every character from fictional media or OCs that one bob style i was like nah. yasuho would still have super short hair i can't imagine a super feminine doumeki expy even if the character would be a girl i also considered a himecut ojou type but i just wasn't feeling ANY resemblance at all and the whole point is i can riff and meme on some of that so why would i divert so far and yeah my tired brain was just like no 💛
#this probably makes no sense to anyone rn#tldr heart render is a years in the making extremely snails pace VN concept ive been taking notes on in my notes app for years#havent started writing it but i flesh out bits and pieces when i can#usually comes to me just randomly during the day#the main character is obsessed w a few properties that i want to have in universe equivalents that arent just like wcdonalds type copies#but also it has to be close enough to still have a bit of that humour and not fall flat#but yeah the mc is obsessed w a yuri anime called cats cradle#about an unlucky girl currently placeholder named suu but will probably be given another name later#and her accidentally falling down a well and being rescued by a shady businessman catboy who recruits her to be a cat rescue agent#its like a tokyo mew mew cat ear growth situation but she hides it with bandages that she uses abiru style bcs bad luck#and she has a bunch of kooky friends and slowly falls for the cool beauty kendo ace from a rabbit clan#its not like ill need to write much actual content for that beyond a couple references but#if you took the renaming and stuff away it would be fun as a holic meme au for funnies#not different enough to be super appealing but i pictured like magical girl transformations and cat 6th senses and cat based rescue mission#like spirit cats being guided to the afterlife and cat yokai being reunited with friends and also just regular cat rescues#its quite a limited concept but itd be funny if the manga in universe went on for a crazy amt of episodes like a shonen jump manga#but yeah yasuho....#yasuho just feels like a good name for a doumeki expy who is a rabbit themed sword lesbian#also i added a few points of reference that tie the random quirks and tropes to like actual stuff thats relevant to the heartrender charas#like we literally have a sword girl in the main cast and another character with an affinity for yuri manga and one thats a stoic type etc#i like the idea that i could create a flimsy little in universe anime for funnies that ties to the characters and the way the mc views them#and also cluld be a good source of light humour#i wanna be careful w how much i rely on references bc im scared itll turn out like 4th wall lazy otaku isekai type writing#but also itd be weird if i didnt reference anything cause the mc is a quite similar to me nerdy creature thing into various stuff#and itd help to characterise them so shrugs#if the infinite clampverse is real theres infinite different types of cool doumekis we should all be afraid dot jpg#not that yasuho is really its just the setup#anyways im so FUCKING eepy i gotta sleep#oc rambling
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call my name and i’ll come running ; satoru gojo
synopsis; satoru can be irritating, at times. but even if you push him away, he’ll always, always be there for you when you need him.
word count; 8.7k (this was supposed to b a short drabble but i was possessed by the devil halfway through)
contents; satoru gojo/reader, gn!reader, reader n toru have a fight, mild swearing (a couple fucks here n there), hurt/comfort, satoru has communication issues but he’s trying his best, depictions of stalking (reader gets followed by a random creep but satoru comes to the rescue dw), uhh implied thoughts of violence? (satoru wants to Maul said dude but doesn’t), literally just me being in love with satoru gojo for 8.7k words straight
a/n; no thoughts head empty only gojo running through the streets like a wild beast looking for u <33 im normal about him yeah.
“you’re so annoying sometimes, you know that?”
satoru smiles. the sentence isn’t one he’s unaccustomed to hearing.
usually, the words are soaked in an undeniable fondness, as they spill from your lips. rich with exasperated love. one that never fails to have the corners of satoru’s lips curling up, a mellow kind of joy blossoming in his chest.
but now, that fondness is nowhere to be found.
you sound thoroughly exasperated, and a little bit fatigued. more than anything else, there’s a vague irritation behind the tilt of your voice, something almost cold. it makes all the difference in the world.
and yet, despite that, a certain someone chooses to pay no heed to the bad omen.
“aw, c’mon. you know you love me, baby.”
satoru is grinning. lighthearted, awfully sweet. there’s a certain smugness to it, though, one he couldn’t wash away even if he was aware of it; you wouldn’t do so even if you could. that smugness is a part of him, one that you’d usually find endearing.
but right now, it only seeks to further your frustration.
it was a stupid fight, truthfully. completely meaningless. satoru had forgotten to pick up after himself for, like, the fourth consecutive time, and so you grew annoyed. not by a lot, but enough that you felt the need to be firm when you reminded him not to make the same mistake over and over again.
but satoru had only grinned, in that self-satisfied fashion of his, and apologized in a way you couldn’t possibly call sincere. then he did what he usually does — promises to work on it. to not do it again. he never follows through, though.
but even that thought wasn’t anywhere near enough to make you truly angry. what really began to irk you was the fact that satoru wasn’t taking you seriously, even in the slightest.
that’s how he always is, when it comes to this kind of thing. and you try to be patient, you do. you try to be understanding. sometimes you even appreciate that he keeps the atmosphere light, but other times, you just can’t help but feel irritated by it.
and the current situation happens to fall into the latter category.
you don’t care if satoru leaves a candy wrapper or two out, every once in a while. of course you don’t. it’s a silly thing to argue about. but would it hurt for him to just listen to you? to try to put himself in your shoes, for once? it’s not about the wrappers, or the undone dishes. it’s about the way he treats you when you complain about it — like it’s no big deal, like it doesn’t matter. even if it obviously does, to you.
so, gradually, the topic of your little argument began to shift, into a conversation about satoru. about the fact that he so adamantly refuses to talk about the things that bother you in a serious fashion. about the fact that he so adamantly refuses to take you seriously.
and he just keeps proving your point, with every word that falls from his lips.
at this point, you’re genuinely beginning to feel a little angry. but satoru doesn’t see that as the warning sign it is — he just thinks it’s cute. he’s just been cooing at you, this whole time, despite your numerous attempts to actually explain how much his behavior affects you sometimes. it feels a bit like talking to a wall. satoru keeps on teasing you, even as you try to be firm about your point, and only brushes you off with empty promises to do better and more unneeded comments about how much he wants to hug you when you pout like that.
and you falter, a little. of course you do. you’re weak to satoru. weak to his words, that sweet voice of his, that pretty grin. but that only makes everything worse, because if you let yourself look even a little bit flustered at his comments, he sees that as his cue to continue.
you don’t even know if he’s doing it on purpose, at this point. is he doing it because he knows it’ll annoy you, or does he genuinely not understand that you’re upset? you’d like to think that there’s no malicious intent behind it, but can’t he see how troubled you are? you don’t get it. you don’t get him, and that frustrates you most of all. satoru can be so goddamn convoluted, sometimes.
so you simply can’t help but feel annoyed. angry, even. how long have you been arguing for, at this point? you’re not sure. but you feel the frustration inside of you grow, as the minutes tick by, into something you know will eventually explode.
a sigh falls from your lips, deep and exasperated. a little bit exhausted. “i’m serious, satoru. you’re not even listening.”
“i am!” he protests, stubbornly. childishly. “you just look so cute when you’re all mad. not my fault you’re so distracting.”
satoru smiles, voice sugar sweet, but all you can do is frown. does he really think it’s cute that you’re upset? the thought makes you somewhat sad. but you can’t show that, can’t let that part of you win — you don’t even want to think about the possibility of you crying, because of this. yeah, no way in hell.
so instead, you channel it into anger. as the blood inside your veins comes to a boiling point, you dig your nails into the skin of your palms, gnawing at your bottom lip and shifting from one foot to another.
”satoru, i’m —” another sigh, sharp and vexed like the blade of a knife. ”i’m trying to have a serious conversation, here. can’t you see that i’m upset?”
satoru takes a moment to look at you, from behind the black glass of his shades.
he can. of course he can see that. you’re frowning, and there’s a crease between your brows, and you keep huffing and sighing every three seconds — you’re obviously, undoubtedly upset. and satoru wants to take you seriously, he does. it’s just that the part of his brain that only ever wants to coddle and tease you keeps persuading him not to.
he’s not lying, either; you do look cute. almost too cute to take seriously, when you’re pouting so sweetly, a little red in the face from all the frustration bubbling inside your chest. you look so small, glaring up at him like an angry puppy.
satoru can’t help but smile. it’d be impossible not to.
and he will listen to you, will take you seriously. he knows you’re angry, knows you’re upset, and he intends to deal with that properly. but he doesn’t need to do it right now.
just a little more teasing, before he has to stop beating around the bush. satoru dreads it, a little bit, dreads having to genuinely be serious, be open and apologetic. it always feels so strange, so discomforting.
all that stuff can wait until later. for now, he just wants to see you blush a little more, huff and puff at his limitless affection, that he knows you love deep down. where’s the harm?
(and therein lies the problem. satoru is observant, and typically good at seeing the line that he shouldn’t cross when it comes to you. but there are times when he slips up, times when he doesn’t realize that his words have begun to sting. times when the line becomes blurry, because he knows some part of you enjoys the way he babies you, and sometimes it blinds him to the part of you that doesn’t.)
satoru is smiling. it’s the same as always — big, bright, glazed over with honey-sweet adoration. smug and teasing. it’s such a satoru-like smile that it makes your breath hitch, sometimes, makes your heart race with wonder. but now all it does is annoy you. everything you love about satoru is annoying you, right now.
in your eyes, that pretty smile of his seems almost taunting. like he’s trying to pick a fight with you, trying to make you even more upset. you don’t want to blow up over something like this, you really really don’t — but for some reason, you feel dangerously close to. it’s not like you at all.
you bore into his eyes with a cold glare, even though you can’t exactly see them with his shades in the way. posture straight and rigid as you try to make yourself look bigger. you must look at least a little bit menacing, like this. right?
“i’m seriously angry with you,” you say, hoping your voice sounds as austere to his ears as it does to yours. “don’t you get that?”
satoru coos, unable to hold the sound back. he doesn’t notice the flicker of hurt in your eyes, only focusing on how the sunset rays frame your figure, kissing your skin with sun-soaked fervor. you look so pretty. and that angry look on your face is too tantalizing not to tease.
“aww,” he croons, inching closer to you. there’s a teasing glint in his eyes that you can’t see, unmistakably fond. “is my little baby that upset?”
you blink. his voice sounds even more sugar-sweet now, obviously exaggerated. there’s amusement there, too — like this is just one big joke to him. you think he must be doing it to belittle you, to embarrass you. speaking to you like you’re some kind of grumpy toddler, and not a grown adult trying to have a serious conversation with their partner. your blood boils, boils, boils.
— and so the cup overflows.
“oh, go fuck yourself.”
it’s almost in a hiss that the words fall from your lips, cold and harsh; they leave the confines of your throat before you have a chance to reconsider them, sudden and sickeningly heavy. crude, too. you’d never be so crass with him under normal circumstances.
but you’re overwhelmed, thoroughly and completely, and satoru is being particularly infuriating. you genuinely feel hurt by the way he’s disregarding your feelings, and that realization stings more than anything.
so you can’t help but say the words, louder than you meant to, before turning on your heel swiftly and walking out of the room.
you don’t even have time to register what you’re doing, legs moving on their own before your mind can catch up. brisk and heavy steps carry you to the door, all while you furiously attempt to blink away the tears of frustration that begin to form in your eyes.
it only takes a second for you to grab your jacket — then you’re out.
satoru hears the front door close, echoing off the walls of your apartment. you don’t quite slam it shut, but you close it with more force than usual, and he can’t help but inwardly wince.
a moment passes.
then, he flops down on the couch, lanky arms and legs dangling uncomfortably off the edges. the groan that slips from his lips is muffled by the soft cushion as he burrows his face into it, while replaying your interaction inside his mind.
satoru can’t help but feel uncomfortable, with this conclusion. a little bit irked. a vague something rests inside his chest, something he doesn’t quite want to admit to feeling. it makes him feel a little bit sick.
(”oh, go fuck yourself.”)
he can’t recall you ever raising your voice at him like that. when it comes to him, you’re usually so patient; soft, understanding, gentle. for you to have snapped in such a way — to have stormed out of the apartment in your anger — he must have pushed you pretty far.
satoru sighs.
he really pissed you off, huh?
(he can never quite seem to get this right, can he?)
it was never his intention to make you genuinely mad. he just lost sight of the line, for a second. that’s all.
and maybe he was also trying to avoid the issue, trying to avoid actually arguing with you. because he hates it. he hates it more than anything. satoru would much rather see you smile and blush than act all serious and sad.
he just wanted to make you laugh.
was it insensitive? yeah, probably. he just can’t help but fuck this up, it seems. now he’s gone and made you angry — and as much as the sight would usually thrill him, as cute as you look when you’re irritated, a pit of anxiety settles in his gut. everything just feels wrong.
more than anything, satoru feels restless. because, right now, there’s nothing he can do. he can’t chase after you, even if just to apologize — that’d make you even angrier.
he knows he needs to give you space. you were obviously overwhelmed; some fresh air will do you good.
it irks him, though. satoru wants to fix it. he always wants to fix everything, before it even breaks. and even now, all his mind can do is spin in circles, wondering how he could possibly cheer you up.
he’ll just have to apologize, when you get back. and hope you forgive him. maybe he can get you something sweet to munch on, or a bouquet of flowers. would that make everything okay again?
satoru doesn’t know. so he just scratches his head, and tries his damndest not to think of how defeated you looked before leaving.
your steps are heavy, dragging you forward, leading you somewhere you have no knowledge of. it’s chilly out, and the sun is already setting.
everything in the world feels so wrong. like it’s tilted slightly to the left, like the earth stopped spinning around its axis. like everything suddenly lost its saturation.
you just needed to get away from him, for a while. away from that smug smile, that patronizing tilt of his voice. you couldn’t even stand to be in the same apartment as him. it’s not often you feel that way, not often at all.
and it only increases your growing frustration.
you are beginning to calm down, though — you know you are. the crisp evening air and the pleasant mingle of people soothes your muddled senses, smoothing down the crease of your brow and the ache in your chest.
a heavy discomfort, and a growing guilt. that’s all you can feel, as the anger slowly seeps out of you, turning into vapour with every exhale of your breath.
you hate arguing with satoru. you hate it more than anything. the guilt clawing at your chest barely leaves any room for anger — you almost yelled at him. just the thought of doing that to satoru makes you want to cry.
because you love him, at the end of the day, even when he’s being absolutely insufferable. he’s a sweetheart, your sweet boy, always trying to lighten the mood and make you smile. maybe you should have been a bit more understanding; you know satoru’s bad at this stuff, bad with emotions and vulnerability. and deep down, you know he’d never hurt you, not on purpose.
he probably just didn’t realize that you were genuinely upset. it’s a mistake that anyone could make.
but it just makes you feel so frustrated. like he’s not even looking at you. always hiding behind those shades, never opening up. never letting you see him wear anything but a smile. you want him to take it slow, open up to you at his own pace, but that doesn’t make the wait sting any less.
it’s not like you were asking for a lot. first, you simply asked him to pick up after himself. the way you do, the way anyone does. then, you simply asked him to treat you with respect.
a sudden pang of bitterness runs through your chest. sure, you could’ve handled it all better — but he could have, too.
every step you take hits the pavement with an irritated kind of decision. whatever. whatever. for now, you don’t want to think about it — all you want is to walk around and take in the sights, enjoy the peace and quiet.
so that’s exactly what you do.
before you know it, the sun has set, and the moon has risen — shining down and painting the streets in a mesmerizing blue, ephemeral and tranquil. it’s enough to give you some peace of mind, as you lurk around familiar streets, soaking in all the open space. so different from that suffocating apartment, and the man inside it, with that shit-eating grin and those breathtaking eyes.
(he’s called you, a couple times. you haven’t been gone for long — an hour or so, you think, maybe two. some part of you wanted to answer, just to hear his voice through the phone, but the part of you that’s still awfully irritated shut that down immediately. so, stubbornly, you just let it ring.)
the streets are empty, and the sky is dark. the light of all the lampposts illuminate your way, along with the soft flicker of the moon and stars. an endless galaxy stretches out before your eyes, little pale dots of stardust shining like jewels.
an ever-lasting, never-changing sky, that continues on for infinity. limitless. all the space you could possibly want, and then some.
for a moment, you can only look at the glittering stars in wonder, soaking in the feeling of absolute solitude.
— it doesn’t last, though.
“you alone?”
a sudden voice calls out from behind you. close, discerningly so, enough to make you flinch. you curse yourself for not noticing anything sooner, caught up in looking at the starry sky, in angling your phone to take a picture of it.
hesitantly, you turn your gaze towards the sound — wincing under your breath when you see the man a couple steps away from you. he looks a little crazed, you think, shifting from foot to foot and hunching over.
oh fuck no.
great, just what you needed. that’s just your luck, isn’t it? your brain can only spin in circles, trying to get your body to react, to run. to do literally anything except just stand there like a deer caught in headlights.
in your nervosity, all you manage is a painfully awkward laugh, as you stutter out a halfhearted response.
“oh — no, i’m just waiting for my boyfriend!” you smile, unconvincingly. your face must be soaked in unease. whatever he wants with you, it can’t be anything good.
at least you said that one word clearly — boyfriend. you can only hope it’s enough to scare him away.
but the man only shifts a little more, emitting a gruff kind of hum, not saying anything else. your spine tingles with apprehension. every cell in your body wants you to leave. he seems a little intoxicated, you think, and the thought only stirs the anxious feeling in your chest further.
god. why does this have to happen to you? why now?
thankfully, you’ve got your phone in hand. as your mind scrambles for solutions, your fingers tap at the screen, urgently scrolling through your contacts. in such a frightened state, your acting must be positively awful, but you make a vague attempt. not like you’re getting any oscars for this, either way.
“sorry — he’s calling me now!” you stammer out, taking a step away from the man. he doesn’t make a move to follow you, so you take your chances and press your phone to your ear, feet carrying you forward with haste.
in your fear, you don’t think twice about calling satoru — but you can’t help but internally wince at the decision, as the anxious patter of your own heart resounds in your ears.
how are you supposed to talk to him, exactly? what are you supposed to say? hey, i know i just told you to go fuck yourself, but will you hear me out? i need your help.
and you do. you do need his help. all you want is for him to swoop in, to take you in his arms, your knight in shining armor.
satoru’s said it to you, before — that if you need anything, anything at all, you can come to him. that you can always, always lean on him, without exception.
you know that he likes helping you. likes it when you open up to him, when you put your trust in him. when you aren’t afraid to ask for his help.
so despite everything, you hold your phone to your ear, walking away with brisk steps and praying that he’s not petty enough to ignore your call like you did to his.
back home, satoru is still resting on the couch, tapping his feet and trying to distract himself.
he’s a little anxious. it’s dark out, and you’re not answering any of his calls. when you’re out of sight, like this, he can’t help but feel a little helpless — worried about everything that could happen to you. but it’s not like he can force you to pick up.
you’re probably at a friend’s house, or something. telling them all about what an asshole your boyfriend is. as much as the thought stings, satoru hopes it’s true; it’s all he can comfort himself with. anything is fine as long as you aren’t out walking alone, in the cold, in the dark.
entirely caught up in his spiralling thoughts, satoru almost flinches when the phone rings. laying on the table in front of him, just within arm’s reach. it only takes a second for him to react as his gaze flits to the bright screen, and he sees the contact name, the many heart emojis littering it.
with a start, satoru jumps up. his back straightens out, and his hand flies to grab the phone — he’d feel embarrassed at his own eagerness, but right now he just can’t help it. even under ordinary circumstances, he wouldn’t let the phone ring more than twice, always giddy to hear your voice whenever possible.
this time, however, he does falter slightly.
he takes a split second to simply stare at the phone in his hand, at the affectionate contact name. what is he supposed to say to you, exactly? how is he supposed to act?
satoru doesn’t know, but as if afraid that you’ll change your mind and stop the call, yourself, he opts to simply answer. he’ll just have to figure out what to say on the fly.
(unfortunately, satoru’s instinctual response to anything is either smugness or playfulness.)
“well, well. look who finally decided to pick up.”
you’re the one who called him, not the other way around — but satoru can’t be bothered with small details like that right now. he only hopes you don’t notice the faint nervosity in his voice, the stiffness as he tries to sound unbothered.
you don’t notice anything at all, mind far too muddled, too clouded by fear. all you can do is take a deep breath, desperately trying to grasp control over your wavering voice.
“— satoru?” you call out, voice meek and frail. the man in question notices it immediately, sitting up a little straighter, but before he can say anything you continue. “i’m sorry, i just — are — are you still at home?”
there’s an anxious tilt to your voice, one that’d be impossible for satoru to miss. your words are a little breathy, spoken in a fast tempo, and he feels a sudden dread crawl up his spine.
something is wrong, his senses alert him.
“yeah,” he hums, trying to hide the turmoil in his own voice. “why? is everything okay?”
the line is quiet, for a second. “it’s just —“ an exhale, as you once again attempt to steer your voice in a less nervous direction. “just… some creepy guy tried to talk to me. i told him i was waiting for my boyfriend and now i’m walking away from him but he’s still following me.” another exhale, as you worriedly sneak a glance over your shoulder. ”i just — i don’t know what to —”
“where are you?”
satoru cuts you off, voice eerily serious. his gaze turned cold the moment he heard creepy guy, legs moving him towards the coat rack by the front door as if on autopilot.
he’s already left the apartment by the time you answer, looking around you meekly.
“i… don’t know,” you sigh. “i’m not far. i walked past that one crêpe stand by the park but then i, like… continued up that street? and now i don’t really know where i’m going.”
you continue, a little exasperated as your gaze flits around the dark street. attempting to recall your steps, a difficult task with how on edge you feel. “i’ll try to look for a sign, or something,” you gulp. “… i’m sorry. i just wanted to get away from him.”
satoru’s voice is comforting, when he speaks, eager to console you. grounding and soft. “hey, it’s okay. i’m heading there now, alright?” he smiles, hoping you’ll hear it in his voice. “i’ll be there before you know it.”
you do hear it, and his words ease a little of the anxiety in your chest, despite your fear. “okay.”
the line grows quiet, again, and your brows furrow in worry. “can — can i keep talking to you?” you ask, uncertain. a little pitiful. ”please?”
“of course,” satoru answers, instantaneous. he’s already making his way towards the crêpe stand with decision in his steps, mentally scanning the area ahead. despite his own anxiety at the situation, he attempts to sound as secure as he can possibly manage, desperate to soothe the worry in your voice.
“try to relax for me, okay? nobody’s gonna hurt you. not while i’m here.”
his words are absolute, as he consoles you. he sounds so sure of himself, so much that you can’t help but believe in his words. so you nod, emitting a weak hum when you remember he can’t see you.
“can you tell me what you see, baby?”
“uhh…” you look around, blindly, trying to find some sort of meaningful hint around you. “there’s like… some toy shop?”
satoru only hums. “can you check your location on your phone?”
you blink.
of course. why on earth didn’t that cross your mind before?
“oh — yeah — fuck. i’m sorry. i don’t know why i didn’t —“ you sigh, heavy. “hold on.”
following satoru’s instructions swiftly, your gaze scans over the screen. he waits, patiently, already heading past the park and up ahead. as soon as you succeed in finding the name of the street, you echo it to him.
satoru sighs, a little relieved. “okay,” he hums. “i’m not that far away. i’ll be there soon.” he only hopes his words can soothe your fear, even a little. “is he still following you?”
you glance behind you, and meet the gaze of the stranger. just like you were afraid of, he’s still following you — if anything, he seems to have gotten a little closer. with a jolt, your heartbeat picks up.
“yeah,” you gulp.
satoru’s chest tightens. he emits a low hum. “just hold on. i’ll hurry.”
focusing only on the tilt of satoru’s voice, you try to calm your breathing. you just want to see him. the thought of doing so is the only thing keeping your trembling ribcage intact, at this point.
you swallow a shaky breath.
“thanks, toru.”
a sudden pang of ache sprouts in satoru’s chest, like thorny vines curling around his ribcage. his heart hurts. you sound so scared, so very small.
this is all his fault, he thinks. all of it. he got too careless; none of this would’ve happened if he had only been more considerate. if he had just stopped you from leaving and apologized, or hadn’t upset you in the first place. then he wouldn’t have to hear that scared little voice, wouldn’t have to imagine your body shaking like a leaf in the cold night. so far away from him.
but satoru can’t beat himself up over it, not yet. there’ll be more than enough time for that later. for now, he needs to get to you — that’s the only thing on his mind.
so he lets his feet carry him forward, running towards your location with bated breath. he’s sure you can hear it, through the phone, even though he tries to contain it.
the sound consoles you, if anything. it reminds you that satoru is there, that he’s on his way. that there’s no need to be scared.
but you can’t help but freak out, a little, when you hear the man call out from behind you.
“hey!” he slurs, stumbling towards you with unsteady steps. his voice is loud, angry, and it sends your mind reeling into panic mode.
a flinch overtakes your body, before you stumble forward, walking even faster than before. you’re almost running now, breath hitching as you gulp. satoru hears it all — your panic, the echo of the man. his own tempo picks up.
“baby, calm down, okay?” he consoles you, voice concerned and honey-sweet. “just keep walking. i’m almost there.”
“sorry —“ you squeak out, between flurry breaths. breathing uneven, laboured and anxious. but you try your best to calm down. “‘s just scary.”
it almost feels physical, the way it irks him. satoru wants to pull you close, more than anything, but he can’t. and that just makes the calamity inside his chest grow, clawing at his ribcage as if trying to escape, to go to your side.
(he never, ever wants to hear that kind of fear in your voice again.)
“i know,” he soothes. “you’re doing good, honey. listen — he’s not gonna touch you. i won’t let him. you have nothing to be scared of.”
you nod, even as you exhale a shaky breath. ”i know.”
and you do. you know there’s a truth, to satoru’s words, one that’s never failed you before.
because satoru is your safe space, at the end of the day — he can be annoying, outright insufferable, and sometimes he’s bad with emotions. but he tries, you know he does. and, more than anything else, you know that he’ll always, always be there when you need him. he’ll always be there to protect you.
and a part of you is sure that everything will be okay, as long as he’s around.
(it’s easy to forget how trustworthy satoru really is, how much he cares. how dependable he is. and how serious he can get, when he truly needs to be, despite his childishness. it’s moments like these that remind you of that.)
but it’s still scary, at the end of the day. you can’t help but feel uncomfortable, a little lost in the world. because you and satoru just fought, you just told him to go fuck himself, and yet here he is. running to your side, in the middle of the night, because you’re scared and alone and you need him.
the man continues to shout, behind you, muttering curses you can’t quite make out. you look over your shoulder nervously, steps hurried.
and satoru runs like a man possessed, through the moonlit streets, gaze scanning the area like a wild beast. his most visceral instinct is screaming at him, tugging at his flesh and bones, desperate to protect you. to comfort you. to wash all your worries away.
as he makes a sharp turn, he momentarily stops the movement, halting to look around. he thinks he must look a little crazed, with the moonlight illuminating his eyes, but he couldn’t care less.
especially not when his gaze lands on a certain person, further down the street — small and alone.
your eyes meet his.
with the darkness of the street, it’s hard to make anything out, but the light of the lamppost helps. though even without it, satoru’s sure he’d know it was you, just from the sensation that unfurls in his chest as his gaze lands on your figure.
an audible sigh of immense relief falls from his lips, and his tense shoulders relax, eyes softening just a tad. he hears a similar noise coming from the phone in his grasp, and he assumes that means you recognize him too. not bothering to end the call, he puts it in his pocket, walking over to you with brisk steps.
you stumble towards him, yourself, the worried crease between your brows now smoothed away. the closer he gets, the faster you move, until you can see the blue of his eyes. two pocket-sized moons.
satoru swoops you in for a hug before either of you can say anything.
he cradles you close, awfully close, so close you can hear his heavy breathing against your ear. it tickles your neck, along with his soft hair, and you shiver. his fragrance envelops your senses, a blend between fresh laundry, strawberries and some expensive cologne. your favorite scent in the world.
and suddenly, the world is devoid of danger. nothing can get to you while satoru’s there. all that exists is you, and him, and the soft flicker of the moon.
satoru squeezes you tightly, ensuring himself over and over again that you’re safe. he might be squeezing you a little too tight, but he can’t bring himself to think about that just yet.
finally, that growing calamity inside his chest is satiated. winding down at the feeling of you pressed up against him, the indisputable proof that you’re okay. with you in his arms, satoru feels like everything is alright, again.
the fear inside his chest, so foreign it leaves him shaken to the very core, finally begins to dissipate too. he doesn’t think there’s anything that makes him feel quite as hopeless as the thought of not being there for you when you need him. he never wants to feel that fear again. it’s suffocating. it crushes his lungs.
all he can do is hold you close, his big palm smoothing down your hair, the back of your head, your spine. warm and comforting. keeping you steady against him. he can feel your heartbeat, rapid and anxious, so fast that his heart aches. satoru is eager to soothe you, eager to make it go away.
”i’m here, baby,” he breathes, rubbing his cheek against the side of your head. ”you’re safe now.”
the words are spoken softly, right by your ear, and you exhale a shaky breath. you’re bundling up his clothing with your fists, anchoring yourself to him. after a little while, you let go, opting to wrap your arms around his midriff instead. nuzzling into his broad chest, you try to blink away your tears and contain your sniffles.
you nod against him, and satoru kisses the crown of your head.
and, finally, his gaze strays. it falls farther down the street, until it lands on a certain man — shifting from one foot to another. watching you both in silence.
the calamity inside his chest rouses from its slumber, once more.
satoru makes sure to keep his hands on you, still rubbing your back with one steady palm cradling the back of your head. keeping your face hidden in his chest, safe and secure.
then he raises his head, back straight, full height on display as his eyes meet the stranger’s. he can tell they do, even with the distance, the darkness of the street.
and satoru knows he looks menacing. he knows the light of the lamppost illuminates his figure perfectly, framing his tall stature and broad shoulders. and he knows the moonlight caressing his skin illuminates his face, his cold eyes — blue and uncanny, glowing even brighter than the moon. staring daggers into the man’s soul. if looks could kill, there wouldn’t even be any remains left to find.
the man stiffens, visibly, and satoru delights in it. he doesn’t leave, though, and for a second satoru wonders if he’s really intoxicated enough to come closer —
but, sure enough, all he does is stagger a little. then he walks away, grumbling under his breath, hands in his pockets.
and satoru isn’t satisfied, with this conclusion. not in the slightest. he wants to run up to the man, wants to hold him up by the throat, wants to tell him off. because he has the nerve to terrorize someone like that, stalk them with intentions he knows can’t be anything but revolting. the nerve to do that to you, of all the people in the world —
satoru doesn’t know if he’s hated anyone quite as much.
and a part of him wants to make him cower. make him fear for his life, just to make sure he never does anything like this again. leave him with a fear so great it’ll linger for as long as he’s alive.
(and a more animalistic side of satoru, one he doesn’t want to acknowledge, wants to do things that are much, much worse.)
— but you come first. without question, and without exception. he refuses to leave you alone, and refuses to make you look at the man for even a second more.
so he’ll focus on you, entirely.
he can tell you’re still shaken up, heartbeat pulsating against him, little flutters of life prickling his skin. there’s a desperation in the way you hug his waist, like he could disappear at any moment. like he’ll slip away if you don’t keep him close. the sight tugs at satoru’s heartstrings.
his first priority is to soothe you, always and forever. so that’s exactly what he does.
satoru smiles. it’s small, in the wake of the situation, but awfully sincere. fingers reaching down to trace over your jaw, he gently urges you to look at him; when you do so, hesitant, he cups your cheek with his palm.
your teary eyes feel like daggers to his heart, an unmistakable proof of his failure. his failure to protect you, to keep you safe and happy. but at the same time, he’s glad, from the bottom of his heart — that you’d let him see you like this. even after everything.
you look very meek, blinking the tears away as you look into his eyes. they’re bright, and comforting. you wonder if he left the shades at home, if he rushed over here so hurriedly that he didn’t think to bring them with him. you’re happy, in any case — the effect they have on you is undeniable.
you can’t bring yourself to look away, consoled by the flickers of white inside his irises, like fluffy clouds in the blue sky. ever-lasting, never-changing.
satoru tilts his head, smile sweet and understanding. ”that was scary, hm?”
his voice is tender, somehow so mature. like he’s some older, wiser being, comforting a scared child. it’s so soothing, so very grounding.
squeezing your eyes shut, you can only bring yourself to nod, as you nuzzle back into his chest.
”you’re okay now, honey,” satoru coos, smoothing down your back as you sniffle. an immense softness seeps through his whisper. ”i’ll always be here to protect you.”
there’s a truth to the statement, heavy and pious. like an oath, a pledge, something for you to believe in unquestioningly. you allow yourself to soak in the words, knowing them to be true.
you’re safe, now. there’s nothing to be afraid of anymore. satoru’s here, and he’s hugging you, pressing kisses against your shoulder.
but you just can’t stop crying.
when you speak up, your voice is weak, barely above a whisper. close to breaking apart at the seams. too tired after everything to resist the guilt inside your veins, you sniffle, and part your lips.
”i’m sorry i yelled at you.”
satoru stills.
then, his gaze softens, considerably. he hears himself coo, softly, palm smoothing down the back of your head.
his sweet angel. apologizing to him, when he’s the one who started this whole mess. when you’re still so shaken up. because he let you leave the house angry, because he made you angry in the first place. because he didn’t see how important the discussion was to you.
(“you’re not even listening.”)
yeah. he wasn’t. he didn’t really want to.
an acute sense of shame. an intense guilt. that’s what he’s been trying to push down, all this time. that’s the unnamed something.
it’s hard for him. to be as sincere as you, as open with his feelings and emotions. as mature. because even in a situation like this, you can swallow your pride and frustration, and apologize. even when you aren’t in the wrong. you’re always the bigger person, always the one to give in first, because he’s too stubborn to do so himself.
next time, satoru pledges, he won’t let you. next time he’ll be the one to swallow his pride.
because, yes, being vulnerable and admitting that he was in the wrong makes him feel a little like he’s being skewered alive — but you’re important to him. he loves you. and he wants you to know how much he trusts you, how special you truly are.
if he can show you that, by being a little sincere, a little serious, then any discomfort he feels in the process is a small price to pay.
satoru’s lips meet the crown of your head, as he encircles your smaller frame, arms reaching around your neck to pull you close. he rests his jaw lightly on the top of your head, breathing in your scent. ”you have nothing to apologize for, baby.”
a pause lingers between the words he’s already said and the ones he yearns to say, but can’t seem to pull out from within his throat. it takes effort, to squeeze them out; but every time he replays your own apology in his mind, it gets a little easier. he squeezes you lightly before opening his mouth, as if to give him strenght.
“i’m sorry.”
you blink.
for once, satoru sounds sincere when he apologizes — almost painfully so. bordering on something you think may be nervosity. you try to look up, to catch a glimpse of his expression, but he keeps you hidden in the crook of his neck.
”i was being immature,” he continues, sighing. you don’t know if you’ve ever heard satoru sound so uncomfortable. ”you know how bad i am with this stuff. but i never want to — you know.”
he makes a gesture with one of his hands, as if that will say the words for him.
“— i didn’t mean to upset you. honestly.” satoru inhales the cold air, in hopes it’ll make him more honest. “you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”
you listen. intently, not missing a word, not a single tilt of his voice. it all sounds so genuine, almost foreign on his tongue. satoru seems to be trying to find the right words, grumbling a little under his breath.
he’s cute, like this. kind of awkward, but that only makes him cuter. you nuzzle closer to him, comforted by his very existence.
”… i’ll work on it,” he whispers, at last. “i’ll listen to you. i promise. i really, really will.”
you think satoru’s voice wavers, just a little, when he says his final piece.
“so please don’t cry.”
this time, satoru doesn’t stop you when you attempt to lift your gaze, loosening his arms around you and raising his head from where it rests on top of yours.
your eyes meet. satoru is smiling, weakly. he tilts his head, looking at you with something you could only ever describe as love.
”okay?”
such a lovely smile. so painfully genuine. his eyes are on full display, shining in the dark of the night, like splotches of moonlight. like someone stole the moon down to earth, and carved out little pieces to put in his irises. an ethereal hue.
he’s so gorgeous. hair just a tad messy, tousled from all the running he did to get here. cheeks a little red from the cold. when he smiles, his eyes crinkle. but he looks almost pained.
(he was so, so worried.)
blinking away the tears clinging to your lashes, you simply stare, entirely mesmerized by the sight. satoru’s thumb goes to wipe at your glassy eyes, smoothing away the drops that threaten to fall. you want to engrave his expression into your memory, so you can never forget it. but it’s just a little too much.
so you hide in his chest, once more. the word that falls from your lips is tiny. “okay.”
satoru smiles, kissing the top of your head with a relieved exhale. bathing in your presence, still reeling from his show of vulnerability. he feels a little like he just cut himself open, let you peek inside his ribcage. the night air stings his skin.
but you’re so warm, hugging him tightly, breathing and heartbeat finally relaxed.
(he doesn’t mind it, not if it’s you — having you look inside his chest. if you asked, he’d let you build a shelter there. right between his fourth and fifth ribs.)
now that the words are out of his throat, they don’t burn at all. satoru feels a little silly, for being so scared to say them out loud. he knows you’d never use them against him.
all you do is snuggle closer, as if silently conveying your forgiveness.
you stand there for just a little while longer, wallowing in the tender atmosphere. finally, satoru makes a move to leave, and you begin to walk back home.
“sure you’re okay now, baby?”
you nod, exhaling a flurry breath. it turns into vapour in the cold of the air, drifting up and dissipating in the expanding starry sky. “yeah. thanks for coming so quickly.”
“of course,” satoru only says, choking back a yawn.
your hands are intertwined, and he’s halfheartedly swinging them back and forth. it soothes your anxiety, and satoru’s protective instincts. you know neither of you will slip away, like this.
you shiver a little, subconsciously inching closer to satoru to protect you from the harsh bite of the midnight breeze. he notices, giving you a glance and a tilt of his head. “you cold?”
“just a little,” you mutter, smiling weakly as you look up at him. ”i’m fine.”
satoru huffs. did you really think he’d be dissuaded by such a weak retort? there’s no way he’s letting you walk around all cold and shivering.
so you come to a standstill, as satoru begins to shrug off his coat. he refuses to let go of your hand for even a second, making the process slower than usual — your heart flutters a little, as his fingers curl around yours, delicately.
when he finally gets it off him, he wastes no time in draping it over your shoulders. it’s big on you, warm and soft, shielding you from the chilly air. satoru can’t help but giggle sheepishly, as he always does at the sight — you look so cute.
“c’mon. let’s go home,” he grins, ruffling your hair teasingly.
satoru doesn’t feel cold, not in the slightest, as he holds your hand tightly. just your presence is enough to warm his bones to the marrow.
the silence between you is comforting and soothing, as you continue to walk. hand in hand, admiring the starry sky. you’re both too tired to speak — but satoru does so, anyway.
“i meant it, y’know.” satoru sounds sleepy, but earnest. ”i really will work on it.”
he doesn’t look at you when he says it, yawning softly and stretching his free arm. gaze fixed on the morning star.
“oh.” you pause, squirming a little. sheepish. “thank you. i’m sorry that i — i mean.” a sigh. “i probably overreacted a little.”
satoru shakes his head, waving off your guilt. “nah. you’re right. i never want you to feel like i’m not taking you seriously.”
his gaze meets yours, tentatively. his eyes shine like wedding rings. “you mean a lot to me.”
the sincere words manifest themselves as a heavy pressure to your chest, closing in on your heart as if crushing it. it’s a pleasant sensation, though, overwhelming as it is. you’re a little scared that your knees will buckle if he keeps this up, but even if they do, you wouldn’t want him to stop — satoru’s love is terrifically overwhelming when there’s nothing to hide it, when it’s just love and nothing else.
but you’d never reject it. you’d let it crush you to death with a smile on your face.
all you can do is avert your gaze, afraid that you’ll fall into the blue sea of his eyes if you don’t. heavy thumps of blood resound in your ears as your heart beats, warmth spreading throughout your entire body.
“… you mean a lot to me, too.” you echo, holding his hand just a little tighter. warmth rises to your cheeks. “i just felt really frustrated, i guess. like you were looking down on me. i know you weren’t actually, though.”
satoru chews at the inside of his cheek, almost anxiously. “i know i can be a little much sometimes,” he says, tasting the words on his tongue. “and i appreciate you for putting up with that. i’m sorry i let it go too far. i’ll be more considerate.”
your heart stutters in your chest. you’re not sure what to say — the way he forms his words makes them feel so absolute. and you believe him.
“i’ll be more considerate, too,” you echo, looking down at the pavement. “i shouldn’t have blown up like that.” a pause. you mumble, quietly, a little embarrassed. “i shouldn’t have told you to go fuck yourself.”
satoru breathes out an amused huff, chuckling lightheartedly. his eyes carry a teasing glint when they meet yours. “i probably deserved that. no worries.”
“still,” you pout. satoru giggles.
“we’ll both work on it, then,” he hums, tilting his head to find your gaze. “right?”
you blink. a small smile breaks out across your face. “right.”
satoru swings your hands back and forth, looking awfully happy with himself. you’re proud of him. really.
“oh —“ he says, breaking the sleepy silence once again. “and i’ll stop leaving wrappers around, too.”
this time, you’re the one who huffs out an amused breath. “thank you,” you grin, looking up at him. he thinks the sight is terribly precious.
a yawn leaves your lips, drowsiness sneaking its way into your bloodstream. you’re not sure if it’s due to the dark, or if you’re just a tad exhausted after all the arguing and panicking.
satoru notices, and gets an idea.
“you tired, baby?” he coos, eyes teasing but soft around the edges. “d’you want a piggyback ride?”
when you give him a look, sleepy and kind of exasperated, satoru grins. you huff out an amused breath, just a tad embarrassed, but it only spurs him on.
so he crouches down, one knee meeting the pavement, letting your hand slip from his. you blink, tiredly, at the loss of contact. you can’t see his face, but you know he’s wearing that lovesick, smug little grin of his.
”c’mon. your big, strong boyfriend’ll carry you.”
satoru’s feeling playful, you can tell. that’s usually a bad sign — but you can’t deny that you’re tired. and the prospect of getting carried all the way home is eerily tempting.
your gaze falls on his back, and his broad shoulders. silently, you walk towards him, and wrap your arms around his neck. satoru holds you up by your thighs, and then stands up, jostling you a little; he does so without a hitch, and you’re reminded of how strong he really is. his grip is secure, and you trust him not to drop you, no matter what.
you let out a content sigh, basking in the chill of the midnight air as you nuzzle your cheek against his soft hair. satoru chuckles.
”my sleepy lil’ sweetheart,” he coos, voice a tad raspy. ”lucky thing you’ve got me, huh?”
there’s a softness to his voice, despite the teasing tilt obscuring it. you can only huff out a breath, somewhere between a chuckle and a scoff, and cling to him tighter.
satoru will get you home safe. he can be annoying, outright insufferable, and he can be bad with emotions — but you can always, always trust him on that.
so, with his coat shielding you from the chilly air, and his back warming you up as he carries you back to your apartment, you allow your eyes to flutter shut; enjoying the cozy feeling his presence brings you.
he’ll always be there when you need him.
#NOBODY LOOK AT MEEEEE i was having a gojo moment ok.#i just think hes. the perfect man. a silly goofy princess 98% of the time but when u need him to be there hes so comforting n secure.#i Need him.#also obsessed w the idea of gojo only calling u ’honey’ when hes being particularly sincere like that does smth to me man.#gojo satoru x reader#gojo satoru x you#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen#gojo satoru#gojo x reader
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✩ ‧₊˚ ✩ IN YOUR ARMS (I’M WARMEST) — GETO SUGURU.
contents. it’s a bit of a prequel to this drabble about the shower scene, but can be read as a stand alone, post hidden inventory arc, depressed suguru :(, small spoon suguru bc he deserves to be held, reverse comfort, established relationships, healing suguru agenda !! i’m passionate about this agenda !!!!!!!
usually, instead of you sneaking into suguru’s room, it’s the other way around. usually, he slips under your sheets and curls around your body, your combined giggles seeping into the sheets as he sneaks in a few hours of sleep with you in his arms before he inevitably has to leave before he’s caught.
tonight is different, though—suguru hasn’t come to your room to sleep with you in more than a few days. you don’t even think he even sleeps anymore, if the dark circles under his eyes are of any hint.
so you do the only thing you can think of: sneak into his room.
“hey, are you asleep?” you poke his shoulder—he’s had his back facing the door since you stepped in, and he’s made no move to face you.
“yes,” is all he says.
“wow,” you roll your eyes, “i’m risking a lot of wrath with yaga to be here, y’know. least you could do is face me.”
“you should sleep,” he mumbles, “you have a mission tomorrow.”
“it’ll be easy,” you say wave off, “i’ll be back before lunch time. we can eat together,” you offer.
suguru has hardly been eating—you notice this instantly. if you’d just get one chance to sit and have a meal with him, you’d force a few bites into him, but it’s been a busy week. for all of you. you haven’t properly seen satoru in what feels like ages—the newest missions he’s been assigned have been much more complex, much more difficult for anyone else but him to handle.
he hasn’t known rest since that day.
suguru is alone more now, on missions and once he’s returned. the gap between him and everyone else feels like it gets wider and wider every day. he’s become more distant, in more ways than one.
“you shouldn’t say that. you never know what happens on a mission,” he says seriously. “be careful.”
the last part, barely, just barely, sounds like a plead.
you sigh, wrapping yourself around his back and pulling him against your chest, slipping a hand under his shirt and rubbing slow circles into his bare skin. he likes the feeling, it’s always soothed him.
“i’m always careful,” you murmur, “i’ll bring you soba on my way back. will you eat for me, sugu? just for me,” you pout theatrically.
suguru is always weak to your dramatics—it’s your appeal. he finds it cute, always gives you a chuckle as he caves and gives you exactly what you want.
this time, he doesn’t offer you so much as a hum.
“if i’m hungry,” he mumbles.
“baby,” you sigh, nose burying into his hair. the strands are slightly knotted—something that suguru never lets happen with his hair. “you need to start looking after yourself more. i’m getting worried about you.”
“you don’t need to worry about me,” he mutters, “you should go and sleep.”
deep down, you know he’s gently telling you to leave. suguru is asking you to leave—but you know if you leave, something might change. something irreversible. so you wrap your arms tighter around him, pull him closer as hold his body against yours.
“i always worry about you. and you should sleep too,” you say simply, “we can sleep together.”
he’s silent.
so you let him stay like that, rubbing over his abs slowly and tracing the skin, writing your name with the tip of your finger lightly so he knows he’s yours even when he acts like he’s alone. you press a kiss to his head, and because he’s still your suguru, he melts just the slightest bit against you.
progress.
“hey,” you whisper, chin resting on his shoulder. you watch his head turn slightly as he looks at you from the corner of his eyes.
“what?” he sighs.
“i’ll take care of you, so you don’t have to, okay?” you promise gently. if suguru can’t find it in him to look after himself, he doesn’t need to—not when you’re here. “we’ll start slow, yeah? tomorrow you’ll shower. and then i’ll feed you.”
“you don’t have to—”
“shh,” you hiss, reaching over to press a finger to his lips, “i’ll bring your favorite, and then i’ll feed you like the princess you are. it’ll be nice, trust me.”
“but—”
“i’ll even give you a kiss for every bite. how does that sound?”
he sighs, hand resting on top of yours as you stay rubbing circles into his skin.
“good,” he whispers, “sounds good.”
“i love you, baby,” you kiss his head again, “i’m sorry i haven’t been here all week.”
“it’s not your fault,” he insists, “it’s…it’s been busy for us all. i don’t mind—”
“i’ll make more time for you,” you say firmly, “i promise. okay?”
you’re not sure if you imagine it, but you think his exhale might be a little shaky. and then he nods against you, leaning back so his body is pressing into yours even further. you wrap your arms tighter around him and pull the sheets until they’re under his chin, making sure he’s covered all the way.
it’s cold in his room at night—you can’t always make it warmer, but you can try to share your heat.
“okay,” he says after a while, “i’ll shower tomorrow.”
“good,” you nod, “i’ll handle the rest. now get some sleep, yeah?”
he nods—but even as you slowly doze off, sleep doesn’t come to him. but it’s not so lonely to stay up tonight, and the bed doesn’t feel stiff under his back. his hand is still on top of yours, finger tracing lightly over your knuckles.
“i love you too,” he mumbles—you don’t hear it, but he still wants to say it.
it’s a start.
i should just write a progressive series of suguru slowly healing and then we can have teacher suguru bc imagine him writing on a chalkboard with chalk. yeah. it’s okay if you moan at the idea i did too. i won’t judge !!
#operation: heal suguru!#teepods.writings#drabbles.#geto x reader#geto x you#geto fluff#geto angst#jjk x reader#jjk x you#jjk fluff#jjk angst#geto suguru x reader#geto suguru fluff#geto suguru x you#geto suguru angst#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen x you#jujutsu kaisen fluff#jujutsu kaisen angst
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ALL MINE.
ft. leon x f!reader
synopsis. you realize you're in love with your roommate. it sucks that he's ignoring you all of a sudden.
content. 4.7k words. smut. slight jealousy/possessiveness, subby leon, dry humping, handjob, finger sucking, praise & degradation kink, unprotected p in v (riding), overstimulation, creampie, slight subspace.
note. i had mental anguish while writing this so i apologize if it's not my best. i'm also sorry for being so inactive :((
masterlist. i love feedback & reblogs <3
Leon S. Kennedy was probably the best roommate you could’ve asked for.
He had fit the criteria you hand conjured for the perfect housemate the first time you met. Leon was calm, and the apartment was pretty clean. From what you can tell, he cared enough about himself and his surroundings.
Hell, the place looked almost uninhabited save for some trinkets and a few bits of his personality sprinkled about.
Only if you had known what you were getting yourself into when you had agreed to become his roommate.
–-
The first month of residing with Leon was great. You rarely crossed paths and never really communicated with each other due to how stressful looking for a new job was, and then proceeding to attend said job was tiring enough for you to make little social interactions.
He was relatively closed off as well. Not talking to you unless necessary or common courtesy such as a simple ‘Good morning.’
After you settled in, you noticed how much of a strange man Leon was. For one, when he did go to work, he left for weeks at a time, and in his return, he was even more closed off somehow. Leon doesn’t spare you a glance or a greeting, only grunting if you ask if he is alright.
He’s also covered in bruises and bandages, leaving you more concerned.
It made you question who really was your roommate.
In the first meeting you and Leon had, you inquired about his job, mostly to try and figure out how your schedule would work, but also with genuine interest. At the time, he merely shrugged, not answering your question point blank, telling you not to worry about it.
He mentioned his past job as a police officer. You’d dare to ask him more about it, but you didn’t want to pry, leaving the questions for another day.
Lately, you’ve been wishing more than ever that he had answered the question instead of dodging it. In rare moments that you focus on anything else but your job, it often leads you to think about Leon and what he does while he’s away.
It annoys you too that he doesn’t tell you when he’s leaving. He doesn’t owe it to you, but some nights you think he’s getting a drink, only to return a few days later bloodied and bruised.
One night, your overthinking got the worst of you after Leon returned to your apartment in the worst condition you’ve seen in the past few months you’ve been living with him.
Up late, you were in the shared living room, wondering when he’d get home. It had been two weeks since you had last seen Leon. It was way longer than his usual business days. You had been worrying nonstop, not getting a wink of sleep. Was he dead? You’d be the first suspect on the list.
You had called him multiple times, all going to voicemail. That is until you heard the faint creaking of the front door. There he walked in, faced all fucked up. His lip busted, sporting ugly yellow and purple bruises all over the exposed flesh of his body, and a bandage wrapped around his left hand blotted with dry blood.
He was awkwardly shuffling into the room, trying not to wake, you presume. A bit late for that.
“Where the hell were you, Leon?” your voice breaks the early morning silence.
You see him jump slightly in surprise, almost dropping his bag. A different emotion washes through him. A mix of fright and guilt, it’s different from what you’re used to seeing him with.
Leon quickly composes himself, going back to his stoic expression. Taking his shoes caked in mud off at the front door, resting his bag down, he walks over to the kitchen opening the fridge. The light streams out, illuminating the kitchen as you follow him, awaiting an answer.
“Didn’t I tell you not to worry about it?” His back is turned to you, rummaging through the contents of the fridge.
“You’ve been gone for two weeks,” you stress with exhaustion, eyeing his injuries. “What the fuck happened to you.”
He flexes his broad shoulder before turning around to face you. His gaze pins you down before he’s back to ignoring you as he chugs the cold bottled water in his grasp. The fridge is still open, and it adds more nuisance within you.
“It’s not that bad,” he shrugs. He finally shuts the fridge close, only the moon’s light filtering into the room. “Why do you care, anyways?”
“‘Cause when you go missing, I’ll be the one locked up, Leon,” you say. He’s staring at you, trying to suppress a smirk.
“You sure it’s not ‘cause you like me? I’m here to stay.” Is this fucker teasing you? He’s nothing like you first met him. Maybe it’s the blood loss. But to be fair, this is the first proper conversation you’ve had with him in months — you didn’t know how he actually was.
Rolling your eyes, you ignore him, shifting your focus to his bandaged hand, blood seeping through the fabric.
“Let me take a look at that, please,” you urge, taking his hand into yours. You overlook the questions blooming in your mind to tend to his injury.
“Okay.”
You turn the lights on, searching for a first aid kit. Once you retrieve it, you’re back in front of Leon, who’s sat patiently at the dining table.
You roll the sleeves of your sweatshirt up before carefully peeling the fabric sticking to his bloody skin. The large gash on the back of his hand makes you uneasy. It’s deep, almost to the bone, and blood spills onto his pale skin.
“Your stitches reopened,” you tell him, cleaning the wound with a damp cloth. What did he do to warrant such an injury? “If it worsens, you need to go to the hospital.”
“Mhm, you work with patients?” You shake your head, wrapping the wound with fresh gauze.
“What’s your job, then?”
You scoffed, “Some office job. What’s got you busy, huh?”
“Some government bullshit.”
–-
That night the relationship you had with your roommate shifted. For the better, you supposed.
You also bonded better with him the following morning while driving him to the hospital. He was so dramatic, yet he continued to undermine his clearly serious injury, refusing to go. The bleeding had not stopped, and you were worried it could get infected.
He was such a baby. You had bargained with him for his own health, promising to do his chores for a whole month so his hand doesn’t get amputated.
You never really did figure out what his job was, but you guessed it was most likely confidential. It was a vague answer to your question. He could be lying, but once you’re not behind bars, you can’t complain.
You and Leon spent more time with each other.
Even though you had no idea what his job was, he did tell you why he couldn’t disclose such information, something along the lines of putting your safety in jeopardy. Wasn’t him as your roommate just as dangerous? But you didn’t bother. He had his reasons.
Leon, on the other hand, probably learned too much about you and your job.
You weren’t familiar with the city or the people, so it was nice to talk to someone, and you may have gone overboard. You were here for a better quality of life, and it was significantly better than where you previously lived.
You loathed your job. Your co-workers were so condescending and passive-aggressive. Not to mention, you couldn’t quit. It paid enough for you to shut your mouth. Well, not to Leon.
You’re sure he’s sick of you talking and complaining. And when you’re not complaining, you both still get along about other stuff. You mostly banter, though, because Leon is such a child.
The guy can barely care for himself, contradicting what you initially thought about him. You care for him most nights after his so-called ‘missions.’ You rebandage his wounds, scolding him for not caring about himself while he’s looped up on pain meds.
Any other night — when he’s actively not trying to get killed, and you’re not incredibly busy — you both get drunk to attempt to forget about responsibilities. Often you were spouting drunken, nonsensical rambles as Leon somehow listened to.
Ironically enough, Leon cared about your well-being more than you do. Maybe you’re delusional, but you swear he does more than a normal roommate should. It’s because you’re constantly checking up on him, you reasoned. He’s just a respectable person.
But what kind of roommate consistently asks about how you’re going? What roommate get you your favourite takeout when you’re not feeling your best? What roommate threatens to beat the shit out of your annoying co-workers?
But you’ve acknowledged that Leon wasn’t your average housemate. Not just his job, but who the fuck looks that good when they’re bleeding out?
–-
Your job has a celebration upcoming, the company’s 50th anniversary. You barely made it a year working for the place, but you want to make a good impression. You also don’t want to bore yourself to death, so why not coerce your lovely roommate to join you as your plus one?
“I’m not gonna go. Don’t you hate that place?” You stare up at him, sulking.
“Good impressions,” you say before pleading, “C’mon, Leon, please. We can go to the bar after.”
He gives you an unimpressed look before turning away from you.
“I’ll pay for you.” You’re going to go broke because of this man. It catches his attention.
“So desperate,” he chuckles.
“You’re going?”
“I’m gonna run you dry.”
–-
You definitely weren’t prepared to see Leon in a suit when you exited your room. He’s sat on the couch, his hand nervously running through his hair — notably slicked down with gel.
“You that serious about making me go bankrupt?” You voice jokingly, breaking Leon out of his thoughts.
His eyes trail along your body, admiring the dress you wore — how it hugs the curves of your body — noticeably gulping as he stands up. The black suit fits his body, accentuating his broad physique and nice ass.
“I keep my promises. I hope you do too.” He says, before mumbling, “You look nice as well.”
You smile at him, ignoring the unusual feeling blooming in your stomach.
The event was indeed incredibly bland. You’re glad you bribed Leon into joining you. He’s been your saving grace. His sly quips and awful jokes have made the experience increasingly more bearable.
Your enjoyment seemed to fizzle when your co-workers wanted to converse with you. They never did before. Why would they now?
Then you realize too late that they’re not here for you. They’re there for the attractive male next to you. You watch in amusement as the girl blatantly ignores you in favour of Leon.
She’s sweet, you’d imagine, but Leon looks awkward, and there’s an uneasy feeling bubbling in your gut as she squeezes his arm in a flirting manner. The feeling is unlike what you’ve felt earlier.
You could go for a drink right now.
The poor girl’s attempt at seducing Leon goes on longer than you’d like. He’s uncomfortable, and you admire her persistence, but it’s getting on your nerves.
Didn’t she get the memo? He’s your plus one.
You decide to interrupt their conversation, you’re not particularly proud of it, but you want to get drunk. Maybe you’re doing Leon a favour as well.
You pull him away, not offering an explanation, just the promise of getting wasted.
When you’re at the bar, you both get settled, conversing and taking shots, all on you, of course.
Leon mentions that he understands why you hate your job and colleagues, and you laugh lightly at his claims. While you two talk, a few guys approach you, trying to get your number or asking to buy you a drink, ignoring Leon.
It wasn’t a usual occurrence, but it happened more often than not. And even though you find it flattering, it did begin to irritate you.
You politely declined their requests with an uncomfortable smile on your lips. It felt wrong to indulge in their proposals in front of Leon.
Leon’s eyes gleam with an unknown emotion as another guy approaches you. His grasp on the glass tightens, and it looks like it's about to shatter.
You once again deny the request. As you get more tipsy, your filter worsens as you half-heartedly refuse the poor guy. He walks away, visibly irritated.
“That’s the fifth guy to ask for your number,” Leon states, taking a swig of his whiskey. His grip on the glass loosens, but his shoulders are still tense.
You roll your eyes at his over-exaggeration. His suit’s jacket is off, revealing the white button-up shirt underneath.
“I wasn’t interested. A few girls asked you out, too,” you declared bitterly. You’re not drunk per se, just very tipsy.
“They’re not my type.”
“What’s your type?” Taking a sip from your drink, you observe Leon shake his head before downing his glass.
“Having fun?” you inquire, and Leon’s grateful you changed the topic.
“Liquor’s better when it’s free.”
–-
It’s the next day, and you haven’t seen Leon since.
When you woke up, you had a pounding headache. You walked into the kitchen expecting to be greeted by an equally shit-faced Leon, but he was nowhere to be found. It was unlike him.
Usually, he’s already making fun of you for being a lightweight, and you attempt to make breakfast together. He’s probably still in bed. He did drink more than expected. It was a miracle you both got home in one piece.
You took some painkillers before heading back to bed. If you’re up to it, maybe you’ll make breakfast later.
A few hours have passed, and still no sign of Leon. You wonder if he went to work, but that didn’t make sense. Why would he go to work with a hangover? Leon was a bit careless, though.
He was most likely ignoring you. That would be the last thing you wanted. He was the only person you cared to talk as pathetic as it sounds. Did you say something last night that upset him? He was his usual self, but you probably were too drunk to notice something off.
He probably has work-related things to worry about. Not everything was about you. Though, you were still concerned.
You had camped in the kitchen for a while, waiting for Leon so you could confront him. You wanted to make sure he was alright.
When he did enter the kitchen, you tried to start a conversation, only for him to dismiss you entirely. He refused to respond to your troubles, getting what he needed and returning to his room.
You thought it was a one-off thing, but sadly it wasn’t. Leon ignored you the following days, leaving you perplexed. You wished Leon would talk to you about what’s going on. Isn’t that what friends do? Communicate? Every attempt you tried to make was fruitless.
All he’s been doing was ignoring you, and it broke your heart.
His sudden indifference reminded you of when you first moved in. This abrupt disinterest in you left you staring at the ceiling in your bedroom, reflecting on your relationship with Leon.
You despise how he’s been acting lately.
You despise his reckless behaviour. You despise his hair that falls so perfectly. You despise how considerate he is. You despise how sweet he is to you. You despise how attractive he looks when he walks about the place shirtless, in short shorts that barely contain the flesh of his thighs and lay low on his hips when he’s sweaty after working out.
You despised how other girls looked at Leon. You despised how other guys looked at you, wishing it were him.
But you don’t hate him, far from it.
You loved his company. From the first night to the night at the bar. You wouldn’t want him to share that with anyone else. He was familiar, so it hurts that he’s been ignoring you.
He’s treating the moments you’ve had with him seemingly worthless, the time you’ve shared — the late nights when you cared for him. The insecurities you have confided with him. Did it mean anything to him?
He most likely wouldn’t reciprocate your feelings, and you doubt he could. His job explains itself, but you’re still worried as a friend — as his roommate.
Your overthinking has got the best of you, and fuck it. You’re going to confront Leon, whether he likes it or not.
–-
You’ve been building the courage to knock on his door for 20 minutes, pacing back and forth in front of his room door. You didn’t want to make him hate you more, but his bitchy attitude made you wonder why you even liked him in the first place.
Knocking on his door, you instantly regretted it, not wanting to make a fool of yourself, but you had to face him sooner or later. The door surprisingly opens, presenting you with a tired Leon dressed in nothing but his boxers. You probably just woke him up.
When you meet his soft gaze, his brows furrow, and he scowls. It’s been a while since he’s looked at you, so you can take what you can get.
“What do you want?” Leon dully asks, crossing his arms over his bare chest as he leans on the door’s framing. Okay, so he’s talking to you after a week of silence, granted, not like he used to, but it’s something.
“Why have you been avoiding me?” you counter bluntly, glaring at him. His facade crumbles, shoulders dropping as he frowns. He quickly recovers, scoffing and looking anywhere but at you.
“What are you talking about–”
“I’m not a dumbass, Leon. Just why? Are you okay?” you quickly cut off his poor excuse of a response. He shakes his head, his messy hair concealing his eyes as he tries to reply.
The look you’re sending him gives him goosebumps as if you’re reading him with just a glance. You are, and it’s terrifying yet so arousing that you can do so easily. Your eyes don’t leave him, trying to figure out his problems. It’s equally arousing how much you care for him, looking through him like he’s glass.
His composure crashes, stuttering an answer you’re unable to pick up. You stare at him, confused at his sudden nervous behaviour.
Leon’s selfish for wanting you all to himself. He doesn’t want to hurt himself with the rejection that you may throw his way. He doesn’t want to feel like that even though your actions say otherwise. He wants to tell you that, but what he says is much more pathetic.
“God, it’s you,” he repeats. The look of disappointment that crosses your face hurts. It hurt that he’s the one that made you look so broken so quickly.
“What?” Your voice falters, but you’re curious despite the ache in your chest. You’re not surprised. Maybe, a bit shattered.
“Not like that. I mean, fuck, I don’t know how to say this.” He awkwardly scratches the back of his neck as he tries to formulate his words, a blush dispersing on his pale cheeks.
“I was fucking mad, okay? Not at you– never at you. I hated how those guys looked at you. I know I shouldn’t feel like this. You’re my roommate, for fucks sake, but–” He continues to ramble on, and the words he spews give you whiplash.
You’re simultaneously flattered by his words and pissed. He was acting like a prick because he was jealous. As much as you were annoyed by his immature behaviour, you couldn’t ignore the butterflies swarming your stomach.
You impulsively crash your lips into his. He stops his rambling, startled, before melting into the kiss, his long lashes fluttering close. His plush lips move softly against yours. The kiss is soft and much better than either of you could’ve imagined.
Pulling away from him, you catch your breath, huffing, “You dumb boy.”
His cheeks darken in colour, the blush leading to the expanse of his chest. He grips your hips, tugging you closer to his body. You feel his dick hardening in confined in his boxers, pressed to your lower stomach.
“Fuck,” Leon gasps softly. You tuck strands of hair behind his ear, your nose bumping together as you admire his pretty face.
“All that from a little kissing?” you breathed against his bruised lips, your fingers toying with the waistline of his boxers. “You want me to help you, baby boy?”
“Yes, please.”
You frown, moving away from his hold. His face falls, his brows furrow in confusion as he pouts. “C’mon, Leon. You really think you’re going to get to cum that easily after ignoring me?”
“‘M sorry. I didn’t mean to. Please touch me. I– I’ll be your good boy,” he pleads, moving back closer to you, wrapping his arms around your midsection.
“Okay, sweetheart. You’ll get to cum if you behave.”
He captures your lips in a quick kiss, moaning softly before pulling away. He takes your hand, leading you into his bedroom, and you observe the new surroundings. Even though you’ve been roommates for nearly a year, you never saw the inside of his room. Posters of bands you weren’t familiar with were on the walls of his room.
“On the bed, baby,” you coo, and Leon shuffles on the navy blue sheets of his bed, leaning against the headboard. You crawl onto the soft sheets, straddling him as you seat yourself on his plush thighs. His warm palms shoot to rest on your waist, softly squeezing them.
He tugs you closer to him, pressing your chest flat against his. Leon gasps softly, his nipples rubbing against the coarse fabric of your tank top.
“S’much better than I imagined,” he sighs, guiding your hips so your clothed cunt drags along his prominent bulge. He groans, feeling your cunt dripping, soaking through your panties and shorts.
You move back from him, halting your movements on his hardening cock as you’re sat on his thighs once more. Your hands grip his arms, and even though he’s stronger than you, he ceases his motion. It’s so fucking hot how this huge man submits to you.
“You’ve thought about me in your lap?” you tease, palming his erection through his boxers. The head leaks precum, staining the delicate fabric. “Playing with your pretty cock?”
“Mhm,” he whines softly, bucking his hips to your warm touch. His head tilts back, knocking the wooden headboard quietly as he writhes at your touch.
“Ohh, you poor thing. Cummin’ in your hand wishing it was mine,” you mock, pulling Leon’s boxers down to reveal his throbbing dick flushed pink. It aches for your touch, twitching and smearing his precum on the dark curls on his happy trail.
“Fuck, yes.” Leon whimpers when you wrap your digits around his cock, squeezing it, oozing more precum, coating your fingers as you stroke him slowly. His hips eagerly thrust to meet your movement.
“So, so pretty.” The blush on his cheeks somehow deepens at your words. His head is spinning, and not just from your touch. He roughly grips his silken sheets, bunching them up. You thought he was pretty?
“God, baby, you’re the prettiest.”
Fuck, had he said that out loud?
His back arches as he nears his orgasm, pleasure rushing through his body. His thighs tremble as he spills his cum, coating your hand. You don’t stop tugging on his weeping cock, living for the little cries he makes from being overstimulated.
“Don’t, m’ sensitive– shit,” Leon whines, and you finally take your hand off his spent dick, admiring his cum dribbling onto your fingers. Leon props himself up, chest heaving as he tries to collect himself.
“Did I say you could cum?” you tease. Leon’s eyes widen for a second before pleading for forgiveness.
“I- I didn’t mean to. God, I’m so sorry. I’ll be your good boy.” He sniffles softly, and you take pity on his cries. You’ll punish him another time.
“It’s okay, honey. Can you open wide f’me?” you say. Leon does as he’s told, parting his lips and sticking his tongue out. You wished you could take a picture.
You place your index and middle finger on his tongue, pressing down. Leon wraps his lips around your fingers, sucking his cum off them. Moaning softly, he peers up at you through his lashes and gags when you push your fingers further down.
“You’re such a slut, Leon,” you say, pulling your fingers out his mouth, lips slicked with his spit. You flicked his nipples, causing him to moan loudly. His cock is beginning to harden once more.
“I’m your slut.”
“Think you can go one more round, baby?” you asked, hovering over his rock-hard cock, before sinking down. Your drenched pussy through your thin shorts stimulates his overly sensitive dick, and he groans softly, squeezing your waist.
“Wanna take care of you too, angel,” he murmurs into your ear as you grind yourself onto his erection. “Can I eat you, please?”
“Maybe next time, honey.”
“Fuck, okay. Can you kiss me?” You press your lips to his softly, and he whimpers sweetly into your mouth. Pulling away from him, you take your shorts and panties off, and they’re fucking drenched. Leon tugs your tank top off, and you giggle at his eagerness.
Your body, so soft and warm, is pressed against Leon’s. It’s almost enough to make him cum, and he’s not enough inside you yet. You slide your dripping cunt along his shaft, ensuring he’s fully hard. Leon fucking whines each time the tip of his cock nicks your entrance, begging to plunge in.
Every time the tip nudges your clit, your cunt clenches, and each flutter sends his eyes rolling to the back of his head.
“Please, angel. Fuck me. Use me– I don’t care. ‘M all yours.” You guide his cock to your entrance before finally sinking down slowly. The tip enters you with a soft moan. He’s so fucking thick. Once fully sheathed in you, you grip his shoulders for support.
“You’re all mine to use, right? F- Fuck, you’re stretching me so good, Leon.”
Your tight walls hug him so tightly, and when you bounce on his cock, each drag of his sensitive dick adds to the building pressure in his tummy. He filled you so good, reaching spots you didn’t think were possible as you used him like your toy.
Leon thrusts his hips to meet your pace, your ass slapping his thighs, making obscene sounds. He can’t get enough of you. From your tits bouncing as you rode his cock, or the expression you hold when he hits that special spot.
It’s so much better than he has imagined.
He rubs your clit with his thumb, a broken whimper leaving him when your gummy walls clench around him tightly. The pressure in his tummy was rising, and you were no better as he played with your clit.
“‘M so close, sweetheart. Can I cum in you, please?” he pleads, his hips stuttering to meet each of your moves. His pink lips parted, eyes barely stayed open, and he looked utterly ruined.
“Yes, baby.” You trail kisses along his neck, sucking marks along the column of his throat. You’re pleased with yourself that you’re the reason he has those marks now. Each bruise you suck on his flesh adds another butterfly to his tummy. He’s all yours now.
“Cum with me, please.”
After a few more thrusts, the pressure within him bursts he cums inside you, filling you with his warm seeds. You climax along with him. Your cunt spasms around his sensitive cock, gushing its arousal, clinging to his happy trail.
You collapse on top of him, your head falling on his shoulder. Leon kisses the top of your head, nuzzling into your hair. You try to get off to clean yourself and Leon up, but arms encircle your waist, preventing you from doing so.
“Stay with me, sweetheart. Don’t want you leaving.”
You comply, laying with him, your skin, sticky with sweat and cum, clings to his as you both enjoy each other’s embrace.
#leon kennedy#leon kennedy x reader#re4 remake#resident evil 4#leon kennedy x you#leon s. kennedy#leon kennedy smut#resident evil 4 remake#resident evil#leon kennedy resident evil#resident evil smut#reader insert#smut#re4 smut#re4#i need to peg him#✩‧₊˚ fics
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ARE WE STILL FRIENDS (teaser)
18+ / mdi
summary: being besties with two of the most popular idols in korea always came with a few rumors here and there, but what happened when one of your platonic besties suddenly started acting a little friendlier than usual? or worse, what happened when they both turned their affections to you?
content: idol!au, hybeidol!reader x idol!mingyu, hybeidol!reader x idol!jungkook, 97liner!reader, friends2lovers, not mingyu x jk (they just share u like all besties would<3), not that much plot, afab reader, smut, oral (f and m receiving), body worship, fingering, penetrative sex, etc.
(^ no actual content warnings in the teaser)
wc: 1.3k (teaser); 8.2k (full fic)
release date: april 27th
or you can check it out on my ko-fi or patreon today by subscribing to either one!
a/n: decided to write a little surprise fic!! ive been getting into bts lately and so this was born<3
masterlist | kofi/patreon
support me through a one time tip<3
"Do you think the company would get mad if we did a live together right now?", Jungkook pondered out loud as the three of you sat on different pieces of furniture around his large living room.
"Yeah."
"They didn't seem to mind when Jungkook and I did it that one time," disagreed Mingyu.
"Yeah, but I'm the girl. I'm the one who wakes up to new dating rumors every time we hang out publicly."
"Yeah, but people must know we're just friends by now, right? It's been years."
That much was true.
You weren't sure of the exact date, but your friendship with both boys predated the overall international success of Kpop as of recent years. When you had met both boys, they had barely battled their way through puberty – though you weren't faring any better.
The media enjoyed making the three of you a subject, knowing that you were evidently the closest out of all members of the popular 97s friend group. Being the only girl integrant, it was common for people to have the misconception that you were romantically involved with either Mingyu or Jungkook, seeing as you were often spotted in public with them.
You'd gotten used to the rumors and hate that came attached to being their friend, now usually leaving those things in the back burner rather than letting them bother you. By now, the three of you were a bit more careless about being seen together. Being seniors in the industry, those things didn't matter much to you anymore, but being seen inside Jungkook's house would surely stir up the worst rumors to date, so going live with him was entirely out of the question.
It did bother you sometimes; the double standard. While Jungkook and Mingyu could even interact in public or mention each other freely, any time you did so you were met with hate from either fandom, sometimes even your own. It also made you worry about your future. Could you ever be in a relationship without facing the brunt of all the hate that would come your way? At 26 years of age, it was a frustrating reality to think about.
Jungkook got up at some point to go fetch some more bottles of soju. Apparently the seven bottles the three of you had drank collectively weren't enough for the large men you were drinking with.
While Jungkook was gone, Mingyu got up from his seat on the couch opposite to you and took a seat down next to you, invading your personal space like he usually did.
"Worrying your pretty little head about something?", asked Mingyu as he leaned over you, taking the occasional sip from his drink.
"It's nothing."
"C'mon, what's up?", his hand ran up and down your arm in a soothing manner.
Invading your space and being overly touchy usually meant that he was tipsy. But to be fair, you were a bit tipsy too.
"Do you ever think about dating?"
"Who? You?", he chuckled.
"No, dumbass. I mean in general."
He seemed to sober up a little at the mention of the subject, straightening up a bit as he sat sideways on the couch so he could look at you fully.
"What's got you thinking about that?"
"I don't know ... I'm 26 now. Isn't it time I started settling down? Have someone filling up the other half of the bed," you pondered, feeling a bit pathetic as you did so.
Mingyu let out a quiet sound of confusion, eyebrows furrowed and head leaning to the side in question.
"Isn't that what me and Jungkook are for?"
Not taking him seriously, you chuckled and took a swing of your almost empty bottle of soju.
"I'm serious, Mingyu. I mean a romantic relationship, where, you know, it's just us and we do couple things and we settle down and all that stuff."
"What can you do with some guy that you couldn't do with us?", he grabbed both your drinks and set them on the table.
Suddenly, his demeanor seemed a bit more serious, which confused you.
Where the hell was Jungkook with those drinks?
"I- Are you serious? Do you need me to tell you?"
"Yeah, I mean, why would you need to look for some guy if you have us?"
Oh. He was serious.
"Because we're friends?," you were beyond confused, "I can't go out with you romantically, or move in with you, or," you gulped, "or sleep with you."
"You can't?", he scoot closer to you.
"Mingyu ..."
"I just mean ... Why would you go after some loser when we can just take care of you?", his hand went back to touching you, though this time it ran up and down your thigh rather than your arm. That false semblance of innocence was gone, "You want someone to keep your bed warm? You don't even have to ask ... I'll do it- we'll do it."
Through his short speech, he got closer and closer, just as the air in the room got heavier. The atmosphere itself shifted dramatically, specially with Mingyu so close to you.
Mingyu was the touchiest man you'd ever known. Being his best friend, you had fallen victim to his touchy demeanor endless times, but never like this. Never while his eyes were hooded and heavy with some emotion you'd never seen in them before.
"Gyu, I-"
"Can I show you?", he rasped, eyes now on your lips.
"Y-you're drunk," you were sure that must've been it. The combination between drinking and talking about dating must've short circuited his brain.
"Just tipsy ... Tipsy enough to get the balls to tell you how much I want you ... but lucid enough to remember how many times I've thought about this."
The hands on your thighs moved to your waist, closing in on you, slowly pulling you toward him. By the end of it, you were halfway sitting on his lap.
"You've thought about this?"
Your nervous hands went to his shoulders for support, easily giving in to him.
"So many times. Jungkook too," he chuckled as he began burying his head in your neck, lips ghosting the sensitive skin.
Lacking any control of your body, you repositioned yourself to allow him better access to you, now fully on his lap as he sat sideways on the couch, arms wrapped fully around you and face buried in your neck.
"Gyu, I-"
"Yeah? Is this okay? Is it okay if I kiss your neck like this? This is what you wanted, right? Someone to take care of you?", he mumbled as he made his way to your ear with breathy kisses.
You were burning up, completely powerless to Mingyu. It was kind of embarrassing how easily you gave in to him. How you had been entirely unaware of his want for you until five minutes ago, yet you were now pliant in his hold, willing to listen to his senseless argument about him and Jungkook being good replacement for a relationship. You also had that to think about – the Jungkook aspect of it all.
The reminder of Jungkook's presence woke you up a bit, remembering that you were literally sitting on your best friend's lap while in your other best friend's living room.
With half a mind to let Mingyu do whatever he wanted to do with you, you powered your way through your decision to pull him away from your neck.
"Gyu, wait. Kook could get here any minute-"
"Don't stop on my account. Seemed like you were having fun without me."
Your head snapped to the door at the introduction of the raspy voice of your best friend, finding said friend leaning against the doorframe with a few drinks in one hand and a few ramen cups stacked on the other.
"Jungkook-"
"So, can someone catch me up?", he got closer, dropping off all the food he was carrying on the table and sitting next to you on the couch.
...
read today on ko-fi or patreon by subscribing to either one<3
NOTE: it wont let me reply to people anymore but ill be tagging everyone who comments asking to be tagged just letting u guys know<3
#seventeen fanfic#seventeen x reader#svt fanfic#svt x reader#seventeen imagine#seventeen oneshot#seventeen smut#svt smut#mingyu imagine#mingyu x reader#mingyu fanfic#mingyu smut#mingyu scenario#jungkook x reader#jungkook smut#jungkook fanfic#jungkook scenario#jk smut#jk imagine#jk x reader#gyukook smut
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🎀Things I’ve learned about Shifting 🎀
1. Background noise doesn’t matter. I come from a Hispanic family household and let me tell you hun it’s freaking loud as hell. It’s like a zoo lol but guess what? I still shifted. At some point you will start to feel your CR kinda “fade away”. I have been in this state where I am in between my CR and DR. I can hear background noise from my CR but I still feel like I’m in a different room or I hear sounds from my DR as well. Has anyone experienced this?? Let me know, I’m curious 🤨
2. Have patience. Allow yourself to relax and naturally connect to your DR. Don’t stress about having random thoughts or having an itch or things like that. Have patience with yourself like seriously you got this babe. Sometimes for me it’s feels like it’s takes 1 or 2 hours until I feel fully connected to my DR. (It’s different for everyone btw) you may take less time than I do. Those things don’t matter if you decide that those things don’t matter.
3. Methods really aren’t needed. If you think about it all methods consist of the same thing usually. It usually consists of affirmations, visualization, subliminal audios, meditation, counting, blah blah blah. If you want to use a method, then do that but don’t force yourself to do a method that doesn’t resonate with you. If you don’t like counting, then don’t count. If you don’t like visualizing, then don’t visualize. Change things up a bit and listen to music that reminds you of your DR or do something that you think is fun.
4. Just because some people like to lie about their shifting experiences doesn’t mean that shifting is fake. Just like in every community there is going to be people that are dishonest or don’t have the best intentions but that doesn’t mean that shifting is a big inside joke. Don’t allow these people to discourage you from shifting to your DR or make you doubt in its existence. Don’t depend on other people's content to feel motivated or believe in shifting. Just KNOW it’s real and motivate yourself to shift. (even though motivation isn’t needed to shift)
5. Shifting is Real. I think we all should know this by now, but I don’t think people really fully understand just how REAL shifting is. I mean you are going to be able to use all of your senses. You will be able to taste food, see your reflection in the mirror, talk to people that may be considered as fictional in this reality, etc. The process of shifting is safe but if you are shifting somewhere that has violence or gore make sure you script your own well-being. High pain tolerance, no trauma, etc.
6. Time isn't important. Just because it's been 4 years or 5 doesn't mean you can't do it. Time doesn't apply to shifting because time is just man-made thing. We created the concept of time not the Universe. Don't blame the Universe for your "Failure". (Spoiler alert: it's not failure) You just need to realize that no matter what, it will happen. It is completely inevitable. Some people have shifted after 5 years so don't give up! It will be worth it.
7. You can't fail at shifting. When you do your method, you will shift to your DR or shift to your CR. You shift all the time. We are constantly shifting consciously or unconsciously. Manifestation and shifting are very much closely related. (But that's another discussion for another time) Just like how we are manifesting on autopilot we are also shifting on autopilot. So, when you do a sleep method, and you wake up in this reality instead of your DR you still shifted. (Just not to your DR) (Get it?)
I hope you found this post helpful! :)
#affirmations#desired reality#law of the universe#shifting#shifting realities#reality shifting community#reality shift#reality shifting#shifting community#shifters#shiftblr
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