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pastel9girlbunny000die · 3 years

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The monster trio Destroying their s/o Nest !

{The idea of the trio destroying their omega's nest was really funny to begin with}

Warning: None, well there is slightly little bit if bad language

Monkey D.Luffy 🍖🍖🍖

🍖Luffy didn't know what happened

🍖One minute he was care freely running around than the next he tripped landing on a pile of clothes blankets and stuff animals .ect

🍖In all honesty he didn't think much of it, I mean it just clothes...

🍖But No!

🍖This dumb meat brain picks it up stuffing the items into whatever drawer or closet he could find, thinking he did a good "clean up" duty.

🍖And just runs off to continue playing with Usopp and Chopper.

🍖Later on when you return with Sanji from the local market that the Sunny is currently dock at.

🍖"Thanks for the help, (Y/n)." Sanji said as he and placed down the groceries in the kitchen.

🍖"No prop." You smiled leaving the cook to his work, the blond gleefully started cooking for dinner knowing he has a lot to do.

🍖With Luffy on the crew he won't just be feeding one person more like an army in fact.

🍖(Y/n) left as they walked back on deck feeling the warm air and relaxing atmosphere around them it was all quite but all good things must come to an end.

🍖"Hey, (Y/n) check out this beetle it's as big as my hand look look!" (Y/n) turned seeing their captain, (Y/n)'s alpha their bonded mate.

🍖Luffy happily ran to his omega wanting to show them the bug which they flinch at, (Y/n) despised insects just as much as Nami and Sanji does so naturally they back up a little away from their lovingly childish alpha

🍖"No thanks Luffy but I'm going to take a nap."

🍖"Yeah! Than I'll take one with you." Luffy jumped around excited to spend time with his s/o.

🍖Placing the bug down rush after his omega following them down to a specific room below deck.

🍖When (Y/n) open the door they seemed a little confused thinking they must have walked into the wrong room.

🍖No this is the right room

🍖What happened ? It's all gone!!!

🍖An omega's Nest usually a place where an omega can be comfortable, whether if they are in heat or just having a bad day.

🍖But where's (Y/n) nest?

🍖"Luffy where i-is my n-nest?" (Y/n) questioned pointing at the empty room infront of them tears building up into their eyes body trembling as they point to the "missing nest" looking over their shoulder at Luffy who seemed confused.

🍖The alpha could scent that their omega is in distress and anger.

🍖"Nest? Huh?... All that was in there was a blankets and pillows what nest?"

🍖"Luffy what happened to my nest?" At this point Luffy's s/o was in full blown tears sobbing and whimpering.

🍖"(Y/n) I don't know what you're saying? All I did was clean up you know being grown up like you said." Luffy laughed being clueless like always.

🍖"Luffy you idiot!" (Y/n) yelled slamming the door in Luffy's face.

🍖Don't worry he didn't stay clueless forever, Nami saw the he thing go down.

🍖Gave him a hell of a beating.

🍖Afterwards explains to him what he did wrong in the most simplest way possible to screw it through his thick head.

🍖(Y/n) with a tears stain face and a sad look quietly took out blankets and pillows where every they could find some scenting a few stuff animals, working on repairing thier nest little whimpers leaving thier lips everytime the fortress flops apart.

🍖Soft knocks traveled from the door catching (Y/n) attention.

🍖"hey~" Luffy's head peaks through a purr leaving his mouth as he tries to lighten the situation and calming his omega.

🍖"What?" (Y/n) says wanting to sound mean but it came off more of a sob.

🍖"Sorry. My omega." Luffy placed his strawhat onto (Y/n) head it was filled with his scent calming down the sad omega, the hat (Y/n) wore many times before Luffy wouldn't easily let others wear it, other than those who he trusts with all his heart.

🍖"I'll help you." Luffy sat down on his knees next to (Y/n) taking up a few pillows into his arrms

🍖"Thank, you Alpha." (Y/n) wrapped their arms around Luffy's neck taking in a long breath of his scent.

🍖"Can, can you also scent a few things, please."

🍖"Yeah!"😃

🍖"And I'll start with you!"😚

🍖"W-what?!"😳

Roronoa Zoro ⚔⚔⚔

⚔Yes Zoro knows what nesting is

⚔The only way he knew was when his s/o direactly came up to him and told him.

⚔He didn't mind he secretly thought it was cute, rare to see such a adorable omega, his omega crawled into their nest looking all comfy and happy.

⚔But over time he started missing clothes, he just shrugged it off, not really caring cause he knows you have been sneaking some of his stuff into your nest.

⚔Like every omega they want their alpha's scent near them for comfort emotional times or during heat.

⚔He couldn't care less

⚔but he'd still scent anything you ask, he would even do it when you don't ask.

⚔But there's one thing (Y/n) wanted more than any piece of Zoro's clothes in their nest

⚔Zoro's haramaki.

⚔It was hard for them too just go up and ask him for it, he'd say no cause he usually carrying his swords with it.

⚔So all they could do was steal it when the marimo was in the shower.

⚔It was successful!

⚔The green haired swordsman, Alpha didn't noticed it was missing till he tried placing his swords in thier place but instead dropped to the ground though to the missing Haramaki that was not around his hips.

⚔At first he thought he must have misplaced it.

⚔He even ended up looking in the laundry room but no luck.

⚔Until his omega that means the whole world to him came to his mind, you must have seen it right?

⚔At first you denied it, "No. I haven't? Last I saw it you were wearing it." (Y/n) try their best to keep Zoro's off their tail and laying to your alpha feels like your betraying them.

⚔Somehow he ended up looking in your nest, he felt bad about invading your privacy but he has to have his Haramaki back he just gotta.

⚔But it was also weird that (Y/n) stop asking for stuff to be scent or being scented themselves.

⚔Zoro dig through the tent like nest pulling out blankets and throwing pillows out.

⚔Found It! His precious Haramaki.

⚔"Why would (Y/n) lay?" Zoro mumble to himself putting the Piece of clothes back on.

⚔"No! Stop destroying my nest!" A voice yelled at the alpha from behind as he was tackled to the ground.

⚔"Why did you had to find it this soon, I was going to give it back later." (Y/n) pouted giving Zoro puppy eyes tugging at the material around his hips.

⚔"So you took it, you know it's not good lay to you alpha, little omega~" Zoro smirked in quick movement pinning his omega down beneath him sitting in between their legs.

⚔"Bad Boy/Girl~ but why my Haramaki?" Zoro purred sending shivers down your spine the omega in you turned on by your dominant alpha, just hovering over you.

⚔"I wanted something... you use everyday."

⚔"mmmh~"

⚔"Well I'm going to have to punish you, I skipped too many training and napping sessions looking for this."

⚔"Wait, alpha-" (Y/n) was shut up before they could finish as the alpha above took them right there and then...

⚔Next thing you took was his bandana😏

Sanji Vinsmoke 🚬🚬🚬

🚬Sanji loves your nest, his in there everytime when you allowed it made him feel so special. Because he is. He is your alpha mate duh. especially when you have your heat😏

🚬Butttttttt now his currently in a huge crisis.

🚬how did it happen... well...

🚬A while ago he finished making some delicious tropical drinks for the ladies and yours is made the best of the best.

🚬He made it exactly to your liking with every thought of you in mind, it made his alpha very pleasing to serve you.

🚬Despite what genders his omega is or how they met, he'd be on his hands and knees giving you all he has.

🚬He happily bouncing into the room where his omega's nest was built.

🚬"Look what daddy brought you my pup~" Sanji sang kneeling down to the nest opening the cover looking in the nest like tent.

🚬His smile dropped when his s/o was nowhere to be seen, thinking you must have left for the bathroom or something?

🚬"Oh well."

🚬Suddenly the ship rocked, a wave or one of Luffy's stupid doings.

🚬.... That was the least of his worries...

🚬The drink slipped from the tray spilling into (Y/n) nest!!!!

🚬😱!!!!!!!!!!!😱

🚬This was the end of him.

🚬That bring us to how he ended up in this situation to begin with.

🚬"No no no no no no !!!" Sanji panic pulling out the wet blankets and pillows with some of his shirts or pants.

🚬You just recently gave him free access at anytime to be in your nest, after this your not going to near your nest in his life time again

🚬He broke your trusts

🚬He shattered his nesting fantasies

🚬Its all down the drain

🚬is what he currently felt like while pulling all the wet stuff out.

🚬At some point the blanket he was pulling got stuck so he pulled harder bringing down the hole nest came crashing down.

🚬Now his fucked.

🚬Sinking to his weak knees as he tears drip from his eyes he got to an ugly sobbing, and his scent change to a gloomy disgusting scent one that he doubt you would want to be scented in.

🚬And worst of all fear of you declining a bond between the two of you.

🚬...

🚬(Y/n) opened the door immediately catching the sight of their alpha on the floor kneeling infront of the door his forehead though the floor boards.

🚬"Daddy, what happened?" You looked at your destroyed nest behind him and his scent made you hold you nose shutting it tightly for the first time, glance back down at the blonde, worried and confused.

🚬"Icameintogiveyoudrinkthanshipmovelostbalancedroppeddrinkonnesttridetockeanbutmadeitworstpleasedontleavemeilldoanything!!!!!!"

🚬"Huh?" (Y/n) titled their head to the side not getting anything he said, kneeling down on front of him, "Its okay, I can just fix the nest stop crying, is okay alpha." (Y/n) purred letting off a relaxing soft and sweet scent as he cooled him down his nerves stopped sky rocketing.

🚬Rubbing his back helped and your soft caring loving words lighten his atmosphere and his hopes.

🚬"Pup~"

🚬"Yes, daddy?~"

🚬"Sorry."

🚬"it's okay I'd never hate you for something that wasn't your fault, is fine your honest with me and tried to make it all better."

🚬"My pup~" Sanji yelled his mood completely turned squeezing the daylights out of his s/o

🚬"But you not allow in my nest for the next 2 weeks."

🚬*Sanji Instantly cried again*😭😭😭

#one piece #fanfic #anime #male reader #fem reader #s/o #alpha x omega #monkey d luffy #strawhat Luffy #Sanji Vinsmoke #Roronoa Zoro #strawhat pirates #alpha luffy #alpha zoro #alpha sanji #omega reader #nesting

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waatermelon-sugaar · 3 years

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Half-Priced Chocolate

Words = 2.8k

Summary = You hate Valentine’s Day. Nick tries to change your mind.

Warnings = One swear word

A/N = Reader is described as a similar height to Nick, and taller when she wears heels. Also I didn’t mean to write this, it just sort of happened so sorry if it’s not very well thought out ahaha

Posted to AO3

Masterlist

***

“You know, I’d pegged you as the type of girl who would do anything to ensure she had a Valentine’s date.” This observation comes casual as anything from your boss, Mayor Wasicsko, as the two of you work together to build beds in the town hall.

A combination of a lot of snow, an early thaw, and then rain, had resulted in flooding all around the city, many having to be relocated. And so here you were, on a night that most were celebrating with their loved one across an over-priced bottle of champagne, some heart-shaped chocolate and probably something red themed, in the town hall, setting up extra accommodation with Nick.

Who you should probably call Mayor Wasicsko in your head.

You’d been here for hours, first building the beds with other volunteers, all of whom had melted away as the night had gone on. All, apart from you and Nick.

“Yeah? Well I pegged you as the type of mayor to sit on his ass all day.” You snipe back, not thinking for a moment, before slapping a hand to your mouth in horror. “Sorry, Mayor Wasicsko, that was really unprofessional of me-”

You stopped your rambling, because … was he laughing?

You flip your end of the sheet the two of you are attempting to fit to the bed, successfully causing his end to yank out of his hands, flying up and causing enough of a breeze to dislodge his hair enough for a strand to flop onto his forehead.

Not that you’d noticed.

“I told you, call me Nick. And it’s ok,” he’s still smiling, annoyingly. “I just - you don’t have some annoyed boyfriend who’s sitting at home waiting for you?”

You shake your head. “Not that it’s any of your business, but no.” You finally tuck in the corner of the sheet at the top of the bed and move to the bottom. “And anyway, I hate Valentine’s.”

Nick throws you a pillow and a case when you hold your arms out. “So you hate love? And happiness?”

You roll your eyes at him, busy stuffing the case, leaving him to struggle with the duvet, gathering the new sheets for the next bed as you talk. “No. I just … I hate the commercialisation of it.”

You wait for Nick to finish with the duvet, before attempting the next bed. “It’s like … so what? If my hypothetical boyfriend doesn’t get me flowers, and chocolate and some shitty card on this one specific day of the year, he doesn’t love me?” You scoff. “No thanks.”

Nick tucks in his corner, thinking about his response. “I think it reminds people to be thankful for the people they love.” Oh God he’s one of those. As if he hasn’t managed to drop in the fact that he’s woefully single for the last two hours whenever the opportunity arose.

“Only romantic love,” you remind him. “And,” you continue, remembering more and more reasons. “It’s all over-priced anyway, and it’s just so couples can feel smug while they walk hand in hand down the street, trying to get a table to a restaurant, where the prices have been upped for two people, and so single people, specifically women, can feel shit about themselves?”

You harrumph again, handing Nick the other end of the sheet. “There is good about it though.” He’s looking at you differently, and you’re not sure how, but maybe it’s because you’re having the first real conversation with him tonight, despite having worked for him for the last year.

You’d talked before, of course, but it usually had something to do with politics, Nick ducking out of his office to ask your opinion on something, before returning back to his phone and papers. It had never been a two-way conversation like this, never nothing to do with either of your jobs.

You raise an eyebrow, tucking in your corners as you wait for him to make his point. “What about the half-priced chocolate the next day?” And … he nearly has you. Until you remember a counter-argument.

“So it’s back to its normal price?”

Nick looks at you like he’s never seen you before in your life. But he changes tack, which you take to mean that you’ve won that particular battle.

“And what’s wrong with celebrating love? Even-” He anticipates your response before you do, “-if it is just romantic love?” He grabs the pillow before you can, leaving you to struggle with the duvet this time.

You’re smiling now, unable to help yourself, as you watch the Mayor of Yonkers, of all people, pick up a pile of bedding. He looks good like this, you think, shirt rolled up to his forearms, collar open, tie left behind somewhere with his jacket. Not that he doesn’t normally look good.

You’ve become more relaxed too, you can feel it, as though every bed that the two of you have completed has shod you of another layer, making you feel lighter. Your heels are by the door, and you are a similar height to Nick without them, which you’ve never noticed before, either being taller than him, or sitting in his presence. There’s something weird about it, but also nice, in a domestic sort of way, as your stocking feet pad around the beds, occasionally catching on the wooden floor. You hope you don’t get a hole. Or worse, a ladder.

But you know it’s your mind which has relaxed the most. Allowing you first to smile at his jokes, then joke back, the tension in your shoulders melting away. And now this. A deep conversation. Which you suppose was bound to happen, the two of you alone after the last volunteer had called it a night at 1am and gone home. But love? Really?

“There’s nothing wrong with celebrating love. It’s just forced, somehow. Like you’re a bad person for not doing it, just because of some long-dead guy who’s now in our calendar.” You finish your duvet, and move to help Nick.

“I think you’re wrong.” And maybe it’s the way he says it, like it’s the most simple thing in the world. “I think it makes sure that people take a breath and appreciate what they have.”

He looks so hopeful, you stop the scoff in your throat, instead letting yourself consider his point. “Well it doesn’t matter, it’s …” You pause and check your watch, blinking in surprise. “Fuck. It’s four in the morning. It’s not Valentine’s Day anymore.”

And then you look up. Properly.

There’s one bed left. You turn around, admiring all the made-up beds. Ok they could be neater, but so what?

“Well.” You turn back to look at Nick as he speaks. “Do you want to take advantage of those sales, or not?”

You blink at him, even as he gestures at you to take the other end of the sheet, unsure if you’re dreaming now.

***

When you exit the town hall, the sky is the cool blue of pre-dawn. Grey clouds still hang, heavy and angry over Yonkers, a precursor of the rain to come. It’s been a cold night, a glimmer of frost on the ground, but you can already feel that it won’t last the day.

You yawn, rubbing your eyes with one hand, while your other holds your heels. Nick’s thrown his blazer over one shoulder, the tie hanging out of his trouser pocket. “C’mon.” Is all he says as he walks towards his car.

It takes a second for your brain to engage. “What?” Your voice has become hoarse from a lack of sleep.

“Can I show you something?” And how can you say no, when he leans against the car roof with one arm, opening the door for you, and looking like that?

Inside the car it’s warm, and tiredness sinks down on you until you can hardly keep your eyes open. Nick only asks for your address, which you give him, and then you’re asleep. You wake when he stops the car on the high street, but fall back asleep when he tells you he just needs to pick up some groceries.

You don’t wake up when he comes back, nor do you wake up when he sets off again. You open your eyes when he gently shakes your shoulder. The sky is much brighter now, the sun peeking over the horizon and you blink, looking at your watch. It’s nearly 7. Which means Nick let you sleep for 2 hours. It takes a second for your surroundings to fall into place, green and brown surrounding you.

Nick’s sitting next to you in the driver’s seat. And in the back seat are his groceries.

You blink again. Harder this time.

Praying your makeup isn’t smudged all down your cheek, you move to sit up straighter, where you’d fallen asleep against the window. “What … where are we?”

Nick doesn’t answer until he’s grabbed one of the bags, clambering out and opening your door for you. “We are in one of the city’s finest parks.” He announces, using his Official Mayor Voice.

As far as you can tell, it’s a pretty basic park. The only notable point is the view. You can see the full scrawl of Yonkers below you, as the sun rises to your right, still fighting the storm clouds left over from yesterday. Funny. You’d heard there was going to be more rain.

As you step out of the car, you put your heels back on, and wince a little. Nick hands you a blanket to carry and sets off towards a clear area without too many trees, and you follow him, spreading the blanket for the two of you to sit on. Nick’s put his blazer back on and you try not to be disappointed, reminding yourself that he’s your boss.

He places the bag between you, and … it’s stuffed with half price Valentine themed food. Chocolates, champagne, even a small teddy. You can’t help it. You let out a laugh as the two of you sit next to each other, the bag between you.

“I never knew the Mayor would be a cheapskate.” You’re only half-serious, and you think Nick knows this, catching the glint in his eye as he replies.

“You’d rather I bought you this full price?”

You shake your head, grinning, but confused on the inside. You must be tired. Hearing that the Mayor, your boss, wants to buy you something for Valentine’s? You must be misinterpreting this.

“And I’ll have you know, that everything in this bag came to less than what it would be in a normal month.” He winks and you groan, theatrical and over the top.

So instead you open the chocolate, grabbing the first one you see and popping it in your mouth. “Nice though,” you mumble, without having swallowed your mouthful, savouring the sweetness of it as it coats your tongue, eyes closing as you lean back on the blanket, missing the way Nick looks down at you.

“Yeah? Worth every cent, aren’t they?” You smile, shaking your head.

“Yes, Nick.” You finally sigh, giving in. “Worth every half-price cent.” You squint open an eye, waiting for his reaction, glad when he laughs, propping yourself up onto your elbows so you don't fall asleep again. And then you look down, and your eye catches on a bottle of champagne.

You reach for it, twirling it on the ground. “So Nick, seeing as how you’re the Mayor and my boss,” you start, sure you’re going to get what you ask for, “and we worked all night long, can we have today off?”

You look at Nick to see him watching your face, amused at the long winded way you’re going about this. Finally he nods. “Yeah I think we deserve the day off.”

You grin widely then, sitting up properly with a burst of energy, and pop the cork. You take the first sip straight from the bottle, leaving a small ring of lipstick behind. You use your thumb to wipe it off before passing it over, the bubbles still tingling on your tongue, washing away the chocolate.

Nick takes a healthy swig as soon as his hand is wrapped around the cool bottle, and you can’t help but watch the way his throat bobs when he swallows, wiping at a drop that escapes his mouth.

You turn to the rest of the bag to distract yourself. There’s at least 3 boxes of chocolate, a pack of strawberries, and a small bear. All of them have the tell tale yellow half-price stickers in clear view. You pull out the bear, amused. “He’s cute.”

Nick hands the bottle back to you, running a hand through his hair. “Got a name for him?”

You think about it for a minute, before deciding. “Arthur the Fourth.” And you place Arthur at the bottom of the blanket, so he’s looking at the two of you.

Nick frowns, looking between the two of you. “The Fourth?”

You laugh, biting on another chocolate. “Yeah. Throughout my childhood, I have had three other teddies, all named Arthur. He will be the fourth.”

“And you lost them all?”

“No, I still have Arthur the Third.” You wash the chocolate down with another sip of champagne, and when you go to scrub away your lipstick again, Nick’s hand stops you. He shakes his head, like he’s having a secret conversation within your public one.

“Shame to hear about the first two though.” You let him take the bottle from you, watching as he - his mouth - touches your lipstick. You can feel your heart rate raise, thumping inside your chest like a drum. You can still feel the ghost of his hand, warm where it touched yours.

You look down on Yonkers again, unable to cope. “Yeah, well. It’s how it happens in real life, I guess.”

The two of you fall silent as the sun climbs pathetically further and further, finally disappearing behind angry storm clouds. Conversation is quiet observations, both of you feeling wrapped up in a bubble of tiredness.

You lie back down, ignoring how the cold of the ground is seeping through the blanket now and closing your eyes as you take a chocolate from the box which you intend to be your last, and you can hear Nick’s smirk when he talks. “Chocolate’s not too bad then?”

You just hum, pretending to think about it. “Yeah not bad,” you finally agree, opening your eyes and turning your head to watch Nick as he leans back on his hands, “But it’s not Valentine’s day so you haven’t changed my mind …”

And Nick’s looking at you like that again, and you could never in a million years anticipate his next question. “So you wouldn’t count this as the best Valentine’s Day date you’ve ever been on?”

You freeze, what? You decline in that moment to mention that it’s the only Valentine’s date you’ve ever even been on, and you also choose to ignore that it’s not Valentine’s Day anymore, shaking your head. You can’t quite believe what you’re about to say, heart beating faster than normal, blood thrumming in your ears. “I would count it as the best date I’ve been on.”

And then you’re laughing at the look of shock on his face, quickly stopping when he ducks down to kiss you.

Nick, your boss, the mayor of Yonkers, is kissing you.

It takes you a second to respond, shock freezing you where you lie. But then your hands are on his neck, pulling him back down over you as he deepens the kiss, tongue exploring your mouth. His forearm is resting on the blanket next to your head, supporting his bodyweight, his other hand cupping your cheek. His moustache is tickling you slightly, but you don’t care.

He tastes sweet, from the chocolate. But then, you can taste the bubbles from the champagne, you can taste how cold it was, you can taste the birds chirping in the trees above you, and you can taste how warm the sun’s rays felt five minutes ago.

It’s perfect.

Until the clouds open above you.

It starts gently, and you don’t feel it at first, and when you do, you ignore it, more interested in snogging Nick. Your feet are becoming wet quickly and the rain falls in large drops.

Nick’s the first one to pull away, and you follow him, chasing his lips with your own, not wanting to open your eyes. When you do, you realise your feet are wet from the bottle of champagne falling over, and Arthur’s looking to be in danger of rolling away.

You can feel the rain on your head, and the drops are falling faster. You snatch Arthur and the now-empty bottle up, Nick scrambling to get everything back in the bag. At the last second, you ball up the blanket, ignoring how it brings half the floor with it, and the two of you run towards Nick’s car, laughing as the rain soaks the pair of you.

***

Thanks for reading! Reblog and comments mean the world to me 🥰🥰🥰

#nick wasicsko #nick wasicsko x reader #nick x reader #show me a hero #nick wasicsko fanfic

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oksana-moods · 3 years

Text

Ghost of you - Part 1

Summary: This story begins before CAWS and will develop following the movies. Our OFC was being held by Hydra, who is trying to create a new super soldier. She has a past, which will haunt her untill it comes to bite her. Slow burn. Plus, the title is a song from My Chemical Romance and brings a lot of ofc’s point of view; I was inspired by a lot of songs and I’m sure you’ll recognize a few. Trigger warnings: Violence, bad language, angst. If you find any other, I’ll be glad to add.

“And I remember now, at the top of my lungs in my arms she dies At the end of the world, or the last thing I see.”

Pain.

It’s all void, but pain.

Pain.

It’s like a faint light in the back of my mind telling me to move, but it hurts.

It’s too much.

I feel lightheaded while I slowly drift into consciousness, and it hurts.

Pain.

I become aware that I am laying in the cold ground, I just don’t know where, I can’t remember. I try to turn to the right, but the sharp pain on my left says to me that I broke one rib or two, maybe more. But how?

What am I doing here? Where is here?

I can feel a split on my lip, my cheek has a gash and when I rise my left hand, I see something like a metal glove. Wait. I try to move to have a better look at it…

Pain.

I curse under my breath; my chest is heavy.

I try to look at my hand again. With shaky breath, I realize that I’m not looking at a glove. My whole forearm, from right below my elbow to the tip of my fingers, it’s all made of cold metal. What. The. Fuck??

I gasp. When did this happen? I had two perfect flesh arms, didn’t I?! Why can I remember what happened to me? I lay my head back on the ground and close my eyes. I try to search, but that is nothing to grasp on my mind, I can’t remember a thing. It’s all gone. I take a deep breath and I try harder, try to think of something, anything at all…

And then, like seeing a movie scene from a foggy screen, it’s hard, confusing even, I see a woman. Of course, I don’t know who she is, but it’s something, at least. I’m outside a… bar? A Club? I’m not sure. I am looking at a blond woman, she gives me a wide grin, takes the key from my left hand (oh my, I knew it, is a flesh hand), climbs the motorcycle in front of us. After she turns the engine on, she motions for me to climb as well. Without missing a beat, I am hugging her waist and then we go. Who is this woman? What happened to my arm? To me? I need more answers, I need to dig further, I need more memories. I feel tired, but I push it away. I search, dig throughout the emptiness of my brain…

And here it comes, another flash of foggy memory, will it be the same wo…? Before I could finish, I see myself standing on some sort of park. I’m looking at such pretty little girl wearing a red shirt, her hair is everywhere trying to ride a bike. I feel myself smiling at her. ‘Look at me, I am doing it!’ She laughs and I feel my heart so light at that moment. ‘Yes, you are, sweetie’. I smile back at her as she comes to hug me. ‘Thanks for teaching me, aunt L..’

No. No, no, no, come back. Arg! I needed that information. She was about to say a name. With a grunt I turn to my side, this time it hurts a bit less. Guess I’m getting used to feel like shit. I blink twice, for a moment I think I passed out and started to dream, but no. I’m wide awake. I’m about to grasp a piece of memory in the back of head once again. I close my eyes and there it is… I blink twice. The shades failing in keeping the sun rays out of the room, but I can’t bring myself to care. Just when I turn to my side, a smile creeps itself into my mouth as my eyes land in the goddess laying centimeters away from me. Perfect silk skin, the most beautiful curves my eyes have ever seen. Having her this way, so bare, immaculate even and there’s nothing I wanna do but to stare in awe. Her eyes stir open. They focus on me. Holy, she’s perfect. ‘Morning...’ She flashes a smile and my heart flutters. She brings her incredible warm hands to touch the military tag resting in my chest. I move my head to kiss her hand that are now touching my cheek. ‘I didn’t know you were wearing my former tag among yours’ She says. I kiss her hands once more before replying ‘That way I can feel you close to me. Close to my heart whenever you’re not around’. The look in her eyes could light up a hole city, priceless, so full of passion and warm and… ‘I lov…’

All I can see is darkness. I’m back to the same place I was before. Instantly missing the warm those memories brought to my chest. I try to go back to that sunny room, but to no avail. I can’t access that memory again as I realize my mind starting to drift off, to go blank. I feel nothing but pain, as darkness embrace me.

______________________________________________

I’m jolted awake as the door is burst open by a man wearing black tactical suit. I try to move away, but he takes three steps way too fast. He picks me up by my collar and arm with a deadly grip. Ouch, this is going to leave a bruise. He punches me in the face. Hey, what the hell. Before I can even muster some words, he says: “ready for the next session?” “wha.. what?” “what do you remember, bitch?!” “I…hm. I… nothing. Who are you?” Another punch, and I feel a crack in my nose. Did this idiot just broke my nose? “Don’t lie to me, woman. What do you remember? Answer me. NOW!” He violently pushes me, so I hit the wall behind me… Suddenly, just like a dream, or a snap, that foggy screen is back. I’m in a doorway, looking at that blond woman again. And God, is she beautiful. She’s wearing a leather jacket that I recognize as my own. I walk towards her, within her personal space. I brush our noses when I see the corner of her lips twitch, ever so slightly, then she pushes me causing my back to hit the wall. She takes two steps. She’s so, so close that I can breathe her breath. My eyes are closed since I’m about to taste…

I’m brought back to reality by being hit square in the face again.

“Stop.” I mutter, now lying on the ground. “Ok. Ok. I remember a... a woman. A blond woman, we are…” I trail off trying to find the correct words. What are we? Who is she? “We are friends. And… And a little girl. That’s all!” I stutter out because that big Glock in his waistband is not friendly at all.

“Aaarg.” He grunts and pick me up again, pushes me to the wall once more, punches me twice and drags me out of the room, or should I say cell? After a few turns through corridors, we arrive in a room, or a lab, with very strange devices and a chair, in which he drops me and ties me, all the while smirking at me. He saw the very confused look in my face, he squats a bit so he can look me dead in the eye. “You are going to break, eventually, woman. I am going to break you. And, in the end, all you will remember is despair. Nothing, but despair.”

I probably lost my mind, or I don’t know, something in his voice made me mad. Made me burn with angry. I totally lost my mind, because I was tied in a crazy chair, in a creepy room, having my ass being beat out of me, but what did I had to lose? All I could feel was this flame in my chest, and boy, it burned. This man could have the upper hand, but I refuse to go down that easy. Next thing I knew, I was spiting blood is his face giving a very blooded grin. I was mad. “I wanna see you try, barf bag. I’m not breakable!”

Of course, his answer was another punch, and my nose did break this time. However, before he could do anything else, the man with a white coat spoke: “Sir, she’s very strong, her memories are very strong. She’s too attached to them. Is hard to erase everything without killing the subject”. Wow, now I became a subject, was this a research facility? Did I volunteer for something? No, not likely. If I had, why would they kick me, punch me and walk around with guns? I’m brought back from my reverie when the ‘doctor/scientist’ speaks again “We could use a different approach, though.” “Which is…” My ‘friend’ in black was losing his patience. I was getting under his skin; I just didn’t know if it was from today or previous encounters. “I think that, since erasing is not working just as it did with the Soldier, we could try to manipulate her memories. Put her through erasing process one more time, and then replay some specific memory, a very painful one a few rounds. It will take time, but I am sure it will be affective. The only memory she’ll have will be one that she’ll beg to forget.” My eyes went wide. I just don’t know what to think. What are these guys doing? And why are they doing it? “Well well, Doctor List, now I know why you are in the payment check.” He turns to face me. “Still think is funny, bitch? You’ll break as it seems.” I spat again, on his feet this time “I will come for you” Oh, I swear I’ll wipe his smug face with my bare hands. He smirked at me “You won’t remember who I am”. He looks at the doctor. “Go on, doc!”

Apparently, this was what the doctor was waiting for. He turned on a few devices and pressed some buttons in the computer whilst I saw and felt some sort of slab, better yet, a helmet closing around in my head. The doctor pressed my cheeks so I’d open my mouth and he could shove a plastic mouthguard inside it. I was about to spat it when he calmly said, “I think is better for you to keep it.”

Nothing, and I do mean nothing, could prepare me for the excruciating pain that I instantly felt when the machine sent electric shock waves to and through my brain, through me.

I must’ve screamed, because I saw the man in black smiling.

Pain. Why are they doing this? I can’t hurt anymore.

Pain.

___________________________________________

I was leaning on the kitchen counter facing the blond woman once again. However, this time I’m feeling a pang in my chest when I look at her eyes. ‘I need to go. This time I think will be longer’. She says and I sigh looking away ‘Then, what are you still doing here?’ It’s her turn to sigh ‘Please, you can’t make me choose between my heart and my responsibilities’. Oh, that line lights a flame inside my heart. ‘I am not. There is nothing to choose. Not now, anyway.’ She throws her hands in the air ‘Why… dammit. Why are you being this cold, this heartless?’ Pain and rage are doing this crazy mix inside me. She has the nerve… Why is she mad? She doesn’t have the right to. She is the one leaving. I grit my teeth ‘Me, I’m being heartless? How long do you think we could keep playing house, pretending… dreaming that I am important, that I’m good enough? You said yourself, you have your responsibilities and there’s nothing I can do. So, forgive me if I am being a bit too cold right now. I’m just trying to protect what’s left from my heart.’ Now, that was a deep cut. But I can’t withdraw my words, if she’s hurting so am I. Right now, she’s standing right next to the door. Hands on the doorknob, but it feels like she’s squeezing my heart. Maybe, because she is. We lock eyes, and all I can see is sadness in those brown pools. ‘It’s not easy for me either, you know’. She gives me a humorless smile. I had to close my eyes to brace myself for what’s coming next. The final strike, the final hit to shatter the remaining pieces. ‘Guess we are too good at goodbyes, by now’. All I can hear is the door closing and I refuse to open my eyes and face the empty house, the truth. Because opening my eyes is realizing, is to accept the reality. She’s gone. For good this time. She’s right. I am used to goodbyes, way too much for my liking. Pain. I feel some shock waves again in the back of my mind.

Pain.

I have a helmet in my hand and I’m walking towards a chopper. ‘Hey.’ I look up to see the beautiful blond waving and smiling at me. She’s wearing a green flight suit, climbing into some sort of fighter, but this one is different. I smile back ‘Have a nice flight, Cap’, before climbing on my chopper and taking-off. After a few minutes, the radio goes off with the blond’s voice ‘mayday, mayday’. All I can hear is some distress sound. I try to respond but there’s no reply. I look down to the TCAS’s screen and I see her fighter descending way too fast to be good. Tracing a path to where the fighter is headed, I turn the chopper and go as fast as possible. Not long till I see the fighter’s right wing on fire. ‘C’mon C’mon’ I said to myself. I contact the base and tell them to send a medical support to our coordinates, but I can barely hear the response as I watch the aircraft hit the ground in a clearing. My heart drops. When I spot two forms outside the plane, I release a breath that I didn’t know I was holding ‘Son of a bitch, if she isn’t the best pilot’ I laugh to myself. I was flying over the woods, almost reaching their location, relief was washing over me, but was short lived ‘cause I see some sparks near the crash and… ‘NOOOO!’ I shout when an explosion comes from the crash. My heart stops. Truly, stops. It can’t be. No, no, no, no. ‘She can’t be gone’. Then, all I see is white.

Pain.

A helmet in my hand and I’m walking towards a chopper (What? It can’t be). ‘Hey.’ I look up to see the beautiful blond waving and smiling at me. (oh, no. Not again) She’s wearing a green flight suit, climbing into some sort of fighter. ‘Have a nice flight, Cap’ (No, stop. I cannot see it again) I hear ‘mayday, mayday’ And some distress sound. I try to respond but there’s no reply. Not long till I see the fighter’s right wing on fire. I watch the aircraft hit the ground in a clearing. (What is going on?) I see two forms outside the plane. I was almost reaching their location when I spot some sparks near the crash and… (NO. NO, PLEASE. I CAN’T WATCH HER DIE AGAIN) ‘NOOOO!’ (NOO!) I shout when an explosion comes from the crash. ‘She can’t be gone’. And then, white.

This scene, this memory, is being looped in my brain over, and over, and over. I wasn’t counting how many times. I was hurting. My heart was being ripped from my chest over, and over, and over. I was being broken from the inside out.

Pain. And I see her die again, and again, and again.

Pain. And I do nothing, but to scream again, and again, and again.

Pain. And all was left is void.

Pain. And darkness, and despair.

#marvel fanfic series #cap marvel #carol danvers #original character

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elzemayne · 4 years

Text

Memories

Pairing: Eijirou Kirishima x Reader

Genre: Angst to Fluff

Warning: None

Word Count: 1,570

Summary: Kirishima gets injured in a fight leading to amnesia

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

As you heard a small groan come from the bed beside you, you quickly leaned over with wide, concerned eyes and grabbed your Kirishima’s hand tightly.

“Eiji?” you asked, as your boyfriend slowly regained consciousness. At the site of his scarlet eyes finally opening, you couldn’t hold back the tears that were already beginning to form. “Oh thank god,” you whispered as you leaned in as close to him as you possibly could.

“W…what happened?” he asked, his voice weak as he brought his hand up to his forehead, hissing in pain. He suddenly attempted to sit up and you quickly reached out to put your hands on his shoulders to support him.

“Please don’t push yourself too much,” you begged, as he fell back into the pillow below him. “You had a really bad villain attack and now you’re at the hospital,” you explained, rubbing small circles onto the back of his hand that you were holding.

“Oh…” Kirishima stated, slightly confused but mostly tired as he pulled his hand away from yours to rub his eyes. “I don’t really remember that…” he added, lowering his hand back down and finally turning to face you.

“It’s okay, the doctor said you might forget some things, but it’ll come back, so don’t worry, okay?” you said, with a warm smile, relieved that your boyfriend seemed to be doing well.

You reached out a hand to brush away some hair that was stuck to his forehead but were surprised when he flinched away from you. You froze there with your outstretched hand for a moment before quickly pulling it back.

“Sorry, Eiji, I didn’t mean to scare you,” you apologized, smiling once more.

Kirishima, however, frowned at your words.

“Thanks…but my name is Eijirou, not Eiji,” he stated, correcting you gently. You stared at him blankly as he turned away from you and fumbled around the bed.

“Hey, you’re the nurse, right? Do you know where they put my phone? Gotta text the agency and let them know where I am.

You froze in place once more as you stared down at your boyfriend of 5 years. The man you loved more than anyone else in the world. The man who you had shared countless precious moments with.

“Eiji…it’s me,” you managed to whisper softly, pointing to yourself.

You gazed at him with growing desperation in your eyes, praying that this was a prank or that he was just confused. But when he turned to you with a blank stare, you knew that your worst fear had come true. The doctors had said he might forget things, and the thought had crossed your mind but not like this. Never like this.

“Sorry…who are you?” Kirishima asked with a sheepish look on his face.

You kept your eyes on him as you let out a small noise that was halfway between a gasp and a pained squeal as you sat back in your seat. Hurriedly gripping onto the side of the chair in an attempt to ground yourself you shook your head. You tried to calm your breathing but you couldn’t stop your heart from beating wildly in your chest.

“I…” you began, slowly, feeling your throat constrict around your words. “No, Eiji, come on. It’s me! It’s Y/N!” you plead, trying to explain yourself but failing miserably. Kirishima looked at you with growing concern which only made you feel worse – you were supposed to be helping him heal, not hurting him even more.

“I’m really sorry, but I don’t know who you are,” Kirishima responded, this time a bit more sadly. He could tell that his words were having an effect on you, but he didn’t have the heart to lie to you.

You felt your hands begin to shake and you were about to try to explain yourself one more time when the door of the room burst open.

“Ah, Mr. Kirishima, you’re finally awake,” the doctor said as she walked into the room. You pressed your lips together and sank back even farther into your seat as Kirishima’s attention was turned away from you.

“Hey doc! Thanks for patching me up, sounds like I got into a bad fight,” Kirishima said, laughing a bit and regaining his energetic, friendly demeanor. “At least that’s what they said!” he added, pointing a finger over to you.

The doctor nodded went on for a bit, explaining what had happened to Kirishima, the procedure they had to undergo for him, how long he would need to be in the hospital, and all the medications and side effects that he might be feeling. When she discussed the amnesia, she made sure to emphasize that the memory loss would most likely be temporary but that it was possible some of it could be permanent.

You felt the hole in your chest deepen at her words as you licked your dry lips and pressed your eyes closed, willing the tears away. You had to be strong for Kirishima. He had always been your rock, your boulder, and now it was time for you to help him no matter what. You only hoped that he would remember you again soon.

You tried to keep up with the doctor’s words as she went on about treatments and medications, but when she got to visitation hours, but then she chuckled slightly.

“Although that doesn’t really apply to you. That one over there hasn’t left your side in days. You’re quite the lucky man if I do say so myself,” the doctor mused, jotting down something on a clipboard before asking if the two of you had any other questions.

When she was met with silence, shaking heads and muttered ‘thank yous’ she nodded and took her leave. As soon as she was gone, Kirishima turned to you with wide eyes.

“Wait, you’ve been here the whole time? Why?” he asked, suddenly intrigued. You fumbled with the bracelet on your hand that spelled out E.K. & Y.N. before giving him a small, sad smile. Your eyes were still watering, but you were slowly getting more of a handle on the tears before they threatened to spill more.

“Because I love you,” you stated weakly. “And because we’ve been dating for years and we live together,” you added, dryly chuckling a bit. You watched as realization came over Kirishima, his eyes widening even more if possible as his mouth parted open slightly.

“Wait, we’re dating?” he asked, suddenly. “Like dating dating?”

You nodded slowly as a small flicker of hope ignited in your stomach. Was it possible the memories were already coming back?

“Wow…but you’re so pretty!” he suddenly exclaimed, catching you off guard. “Why would someone like you be with me?”

His question made you laugh genuinely even as you sniffled a bit and shook your head.

“I should be asking myself that question,” you said, chuckling a bit and resisting the urge to throw your arms tightly around your boyfriend. “I don’t think there’s a minute that goes by when I’m not grateful to have you in my life, Eiji,” you said, with a smile on your face.

Kirishima’s eyes lit up at your words as he gave you a grin.

“Oh man, now I’m angry I don’t remember everything about you!” he exclaimed, bringing a hand onto yours and resting it there for a moment. You gazed down at your hands on top of each other before looking back at your boyfriend.

“You don’t have to say yes but…is it okay if I hug you?” you asked, slowly, not wanting to put pressure on Kirishima but wanting more than anything you cling to the man you loved.

You could try to be the bigger person and you could try to be his support, but all you wanted to do right now was hold him tightly and assure yourself that he was still here. That everything was going to be okay. Kirishima’s smile didn’t waver at all as he opened up his arms.

“Yea, of course you can! We’re dating after all, right?” he exclaimed, happily.

The familiar warmth and positivity that flowed from Kirishima made you immediately fall into him. You tried to be careful to avoid any of his bandages as you wrapped your arms around him tightly, allowing a few tears to fall from your eyes.

“Y/N…” you heard Kirishima whisper in a knowing voice and you smiled through your tears as you nodded into his neck. Pulling away from the hug, you wiped your eyes away and nodded towards him with resolve.

“Okay, we’re gonna work hard together and kick amnesia’s ass!” Kirishima exclaimed, lifting up his fist with renewed energy. You nodded and laughed, despite the tears still wet on your face, and Kirishima joined your laughter as he wiped your cheeks with his fingers.

“Maybe let’s just start by looking at some old photos to bring back some memories,” you suggested, reaching for you phone.

Kirishima agreed and as you began to show him all of the pictures you had of the two of you, you watched his eyes brighten. He asked questions and every now and again would remember a specific place or event, making you cheer lightly and give him a small hug.

It would be a long road, but you were determined to either bring back the Kirishima you loved, or fall in love with the new Kirishima while trying.

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sasa-gay-yo · 3 years

Text

Maybe (Levi Ackerman x Female!Reader)

Request / Summary: I was wondering if you could write about female y/n being taller than Levi (he's 5'2" and y/n is 5'7"). Sharp, rational mind, she's the new quartermaster and in charge of the supplies... she was asked to cut unnecessary orders. So she terminates the tea supply contract... Levi's not happy and confronts her about it. It takes several arguments to convince her to conclude a new tea supply contract... VERY annoying... but damn, he likes her wit.

Timeline: Season 1 - 2 ish

Warnings: some swearin’

Art Credits: AoT (I think?)

“Budgets are very important to adhere to when you’re trying to fight against a never-ending force of titans, Captain Levi. I’m sorry, but there’s nothing I can do.” You sing-songed those last words, finding happiness in the sheer annoyance that graced his face after. This was power.

“And who gave you the order to cut my tea supply?” His hands turned into fists, keeping his distance so he didn’t have to stare up at you. You noticed this and made sure to take a few steps forward to look down at him. On an everyday basis, you were below him in rank, but this situation made you feel so powerful. Erwin had approved this budget right in front of him, so it was funny to see him so upset over his precious tea that he, himself signed away.

“I did. Does your tea have the same ability to feed the entirety of the Scouts for an extra week? No, it does not. It was either bread from all, or tea for one. I think we all will appreciate your sacrifice, Captain.” He grit his teeth and you could see, physically, how irritate he was with you. While it was a bit scary, your new status as quartermaster made your training sessions almost disappear with how busy you’d become. He couldn’t discipline you if you weren’t able to be present.

Also, it wasn’t like your decision was wrong. If he went to Commander Erwin to talk about it, he’d probably say the same thing. He definitely knew that. That’s why he was spending so much time here arguing with you, rather than going directly to the higher ups. You smirked at that thought.

“You were asked to cut unnecessary orders, Cadet. The tea supply is a necessity.” You held up your clipboard to his face and he glared at the paper as you used your pencil to explain to him the budget.

“Your tea supply cost the same amount as three bags of flour and yeast. As I said before, food is a necessity, Captain. I can’t, in good conscious, let my fellow comrades go hungry while you have a cup of tea every night. Also, it’s Quartermaster (Y/L/N) now, hence the ability for me to cut your tea supply from the shop in Mitras. If you’re able to find me a cheaper and closer shop to buy from, then all means… Captain.” He didn’t like the way you sneered his name and he wanted to make you run laps out in the hot sun instead of standing under this tent causing him mental anguish, yet he couldn’t think of an argument against yours. He just wanted his tea. No, he needed his tea. The caffeine was what allowed him to stay up and not fall into his nightmare’s grasp. The caffeine was what allowed him to function after a night of no sleep. He needed to convince you to put that back on the list, even if that meant the brats didn’t have bread for a week.

“You’re dismissed, Cadet,” he said, walking away from where he came to find you. You laughed at his actions when you thought he couldn’t hear you, seeing how ridiculous the Captain was acting after not getting his specific and expensive artisan teas. You saved so much money from cutting the export taxes alone, that it was worth the little grumpy short man and maybe a few more laps around HQ. However, you would apologize to the new cadets who were definitely going to get the brunt of his anger. If it got really bad, you could just give him a bit of your “commoner’s” tea.

The next time he confronted you was two days later at dinner. You didn’t know he was behind you, but you were telling the new cadets all about Captain Levi’s attitude. They were complaining how harsh he was towards them, and the older Scouts, like yourself, were all recollecting stories of your first time meeting the Captain.

“The first time I interacted with Captain Levi, I flirted with him and shorty made me run laps until sunset. He was probably just flustered, you know. Captain Shorty doesn’t know how to react to pretty women, I guess.” You didn’t notice the kids freeze up when they saw who approached behind you. You just kept on going, probably digging yourself in a bigger and bigger hole as Levi stood behind you, arms crossed and ever so irritated.

“One time when he was disciplining me I reac-”

“Quartermaster (Y/L/N), unless you want to run laps again till sunrise, I suggest you stop telling such ludicrous stories to the new cadets.” You smirked, turning around with the cup of tea you had in your hand. You’d taken the liberty of using your own stash, as a drinker of the liquid yourself, and now you were going to flaunt it in front of him. You took a sip before talking back.

“Captain Levi, I didn’t see you there! Do you want to talk about your tea supplies with me? I have a meeting with Commander Erwin next week about next months orders…” You trailed off, sipping at your tea, but not hiding your smirk. You now had something over the Captain that was worth far too much for him to annoy you or dish out a punishment. He knew that. If he made you run into the sunset, the tea was going with you. There would be no mention of it at your next meeting with Erwin. Gripping his fists behind his back, he made sure his face was that normal, annoying look when glancing at you out of the corner of his eye.

“No, (Y/L/N), I just came here to tell you that I do, in fact, know how to handle pretty women. That’s why I made you run. Have a nice dinner.” The new cadets snickered behind you as you gripped the teacup hard.

Oh no, forget about dangling it in front of his head. There was no way you were going to let him have it after he insulted you in front of everyone like that. You turned around and glared at Jean who was laughing the loudest out of the others. That tea was gone now.

You let him know it, too.

As you were walking out of the Mess Hall, you made an effort to stop at the officer’s table in front of the Commander. He smiled up at you while Levi’s glared was evident to your left.

“Commander, do you have time tomorrow or the next day to push up the supply meeting? I think that with the winter coming soon, shipping lines are going to be cut off by impending snow. Ordering a week earlier would be most beneficial, especially since our supplies are already dwindling.” Erwin agreed with you, noting that this foresight is why he assigned you to the position that was vacated by the other Quartermaster (who was killed by a titan).

“I can meet with you tomorrow after lunch, Quartermaster (Y/L/N). Just come to my office!” You smiled back at him and turned your attention to Levi. As you walked by, you mumbled something under your breath, but you knew he heard you. Payback was served to the cocky man you hated ever since you stepped foot on the Scout HQ grounds.

“You’re never getting your tea back, Levi.”

And at the meeting with Erwin, you did just that. He agreed with your plans completely, signing off on it without any protests. You would be excused from training the next day, and would be riding into Trost to set up the order with Reeve’s Company. You might even make a day out of it, needing a fresh haircut and maybe a relaxing stroll through Trost. Then, Erwin called out to you before you could walk out through his office door.

“Oh, by the way, (Y/F/N), Captain Levi will be personally accompanying you to Trost tomorrow.”

You hadn’t talked at all. You just sat next to each other in the cart while the horses pulled you along towards Trost. He made you do all the work too. You hitched up both horses, tied them to the cart, and you were now holding the reigns to make sure they stayed on the pebbled path. He just sat there the whole time is his normal position, one leg up and blank expression. It made you extremely annoyed and he could feel the anger radiate off of you as he sat, which made him smirk. Getting the upper hand on you was one thing that Levi found recently brought him joy.

“Permission to speak freely, Captain?” You had enough. He wasn’t shocked at your request, but he wasn’t sure he’d let that upper hand go. If you said something out of line, he’d jump at the chance to punish you… but he allowed it because he was curious. Besides, he was excited to see what useless insults left your lips today.

“Permission granted.”

“Why the fuck are you here?” It almost surprised him, the tongue you had on you, but he also knew the cadets you were friends with. You’d even taken some of the new ones under your wing, Jean and Connie. Levi has punished them various times for their filthy mouths, and he’s heard it millions of times, but never towards him. You should feel honored that he let you say that to him.

“I just wanted to take a trip, Cadet. Besides, a woman shouldn’t be travelling by herself in a world like this.” You gave him an annoyed look and rolled your eyes. Again, you should feel honored he’s gracing you like this. If any cadet did that to him, he’d kick them off the cart right away and discipline them. Again, he was just curious.

“I thought you didn’t give a damn that I was a woman, Levi.” He put his arms behind his head, closing his eyes. You were making this too easy for him. It was when your anger got the best of you that your insults were sloppy and uncalculated. He’d also made the same assessment when it came to your fighting. Perhaps that’s why he’d always insult you before fighting drills, knowing he could get the upper hand. Still, it was going to an easy day for him if you acted like this.

“With a mouth like that, how could I consider you one, (Y/F/N)?” You scoffed, but a thought popped into your head. He said speak freely, so you were going to do just that. You couldn’t let him win, not when you were going to be stuck with him all day.

“With height like that, how could I consider you a man, Shorty?” You felt him freeze next to you, now instantly regretting his permission. You knew how bad he wanted to kick you, and the tone of his voice hardened.

“Permission rescinded. Say something like that again and you’ll be locked up for insubordination and be punished.”

“You know I don’t mind punishment, Captain. Especially with you.” He scoffed, closing his eyes again and making sure that you didn’t see his flush. How nasty was this woman he was sitting next to? You just laughed at his reaction. When you were a new cadet, you gained the brunt of Levi’s punishments, simply because you didn’t give him the legitimacy the others did.

Everyday, you would find some way to make your presence his problem. At first, it was openly flirting in front of him, trying to get some reaction, only to be punished by running or cleaning. Next, it was besting your partners, just so you would have to fight him. Levi usually didn’t struggle to fight with new cadets, but you would give him a run for his money. You never won, but you’d get so devilishly close that you knew it slowly frustrated him. The last thing would be questioning his orders, which he hated the most. While you knew to never do it out in the field, it was fair game during training. Why should we hold our ODM gear this way when you don’t, Captain? I don’t think that’s the best formation, Captain, why did you choose that? He would physically punish you then, which gave you fuel. Perhaps it was the way he led others with insult, or the fact everyone bowed to him without question that pushed you to never listen. Slowly and surely, you were wreaking havoc in his mind, but nothing permanent to really stick it to him.

Then, you were given the Quartermaster position by Commander Erwin. As insubordinate you would be to Levi, you knew who and when to rub up to others. Besides, you liked the other officers. Erwin discovered your experience with supply work and inventory at your family restaurant, so he put the job up to you. When you saw that Captain Levi had personally requested to break the rules and order five personal items instead of one, you knew it was your turn to punish him. You didn’t know how much joy it would bring you to erase the tea order off of the inventory chart until he came marching into the supply tent.

“You would be a better soldier if you listened to authority, Cadet.” It seemed the only way he could recover with you was to insult you back into submission. His voice was softer then, calmer and more composed: normal. To you, he seemed to be more serious, but it made you roll your eyes again. You didn’t care if he caught you.

“I am a good soldier, Captain. You don’t put worth on my fighting skills, but on my ability to listen to you.”

“If you listened, you would be an officer by now.” Levi knew you were a good soldier. You would rush out on the field and sacrifice your life or horse or swords for any comrade, regardless how they treated you at dinner the other day. The only time you would listen to Levi without question was on the field, too, and you would execute his shouts with speed and precision. He knew that the new cadets looked up to you, too, after saving many of their assess on the first expedition with Erwin’s new formation. If only you were the same off, then you would be on Levi’s Squad at least, if not in the officers’ cabinet.

You knew that too. You heard the others’ praise your skills and critique your behavior. You wouldn’t let anyone tell you what to do unless they had legitimacy in your mind. Erwin was amazing at strategy and kind to anyone, Hange was extremely intelligent and didn’t care who you were, and Miche was just soft and wouldn’t hurt a fly unless they threatened his squad. Levi was an amazing soldier, but it seemed that was the only thing he had. You didn’t give appreciation to those with bullied others with their brawn.

“I don’t want to be an officer, Captain. Quartermaster is the farthest I’ll go.” He frowned, knowing that one day you’d probably be promoted due to someone’s death. Maybe even his. You had to have known that.

“Why?”

“Papers please! Where in Trost are you- OH! Captain Levi!” The Garrison member bowed only once, seeing Levi’s annoyed face as he cut him off. You handed the papers, smiling, and was permitted into the district, turning right away to get to Reeve’s. You had no intention of answering his question, and he didn’t press anymore as the horses galloped up to the depot. When you hopped out, you smiled at all the workers, knowing they’d give you some extra supplies if you buttered up to them. It worked last time, but you were alone last time.

“Flegel! How are you today?” He looked directly at Levi, not even caring that you just greeted him. You just rolled your eyes again at the two and went to work, picking up the things on the list and signing. Levi didn’t get out to help once, he just sat in the cart, looking down at you like you were an ant. At one point, you stood next to the cart, noting that you were almost equal to his sitting height. You straightened up to make sure he realized it too.

“I thought you came here to help, Captain.” He scoffed and sent another glare at Flegel who was shouting at some worker.

“I thought the Commander was clear in that I’d be accompanying you. I have no intention of doing heavy lifting.” You leaned back on the edge of the wood, marking off the rush supplies they put in the cart. The only thing that was left was the heavy bags of flour that three people needed to carry. You wondered if Levi would order you to go back right away, or he’d let you go off and do errands of your own.

“You’re right, he didn’t say. You probably couldn’t carry any of these things either, they’re a bit heavy… Captain.” Before he could say something back, hearing your insults, Flegel couldn’t help but join in. He’d told you on your previous supply run that he disliked the short man more than anyone in Trost and it stemmed from an apparent mess up and fight over Levi’s tea order. Go figure.

“Some of these packages are taller than you, Captain Levi. We can’t have our strongest soldier getting hurt by some wood, can we?” His question was directed at you, hoping you would jump in and support him, but after feeling the anger radiating off of Levi behind you, you knew it was better to not indulge him. Flegel was the easier target in this situation.

“I’ve never seen you carry any packages, Shorty.” He paused in his tracks, now noting that your insults were not on his side. They’d never be on his side. You stood up to your full height, trying to tower over Flegel as you handed him the list to sign. He was mumbling something under his breath, and you wouldn’t let him breath.

“What was that? Speak up, I can’t hear you from up here, Flegel.” With that, he walked away without saying goodbye, and your smile was the largest Levi had seen it. In fact, Levi was also satisfied with the way you put the fat boy in his place. Only a little bit surprised, though, that you defended him after insulting him yourself. It seemed to put him in a better mood and he even offered to buy lunch to take back.

You took the cart outside of Trost, letting the horses rest and eat in a meadow before the heavy ride back. Levi and you were on the grass eating, him leaning against a tree. He’d bought pork buns and you noted that it seemed to be his favorite food. You noticed his change in mood, which was probably the reason he’d bought you the buns, but didn’t press it. You also realized this was probably the first time you’d talk to him at length without getting reprimanded or into a fight.

“Is that fat boy always like that?” You huffed in laughter at the nickname he’d given Flegel.

“No, usually he tries to get me to eat dinner with him and I always deny.” Levi could imagine it in his head. If the way you acted in front of him was restrained, he wondered what you would say to the boy once you were all alone. Maybe he’d come again just so he could witness you insulting someone other than him. He had to admit, it was funny, and he wondered if that’s what it looked like to others as well.

“How do you deny him?” This answer might get rid of his good mood.

“I tell him I don’t go out with men shorter than me.” He just rolled his eyes and took another bite. Of course that was your answer. You’d do something daily to remind Levi that you were taller than him.

“Why did you come again? You could’ve saved yourself the time and insults.” You looked up at him from your seat on the grass, having eaten all the buns. He was a slow eater.

“To get my tea back. I saw it in the Reeve’s storage room. What a waste.” You laid back on the grass, looking up at the sky. It was getting colder, and you could tell by the heaviness of the clouds that your prediction on early snow was going to be correct.

“All officers get only one personal item per request. Erwin’s is a leather-bound journal, Hange’s is glassware for experiments, and yours, if we list them all off, are cleaning supplies, tea, a new broom, extra milk, and a fresh linen shirt. When I went to Erwin about it, he just told me to get rid of the most expensive thing and let you have the rest. If anything, yell at him, and stop bothering me about it.”

“I don’t need the linen shirt. Take that off and give me back the tea.” You laughed at him again, and it made him pull back the annoying look. His good mood was quickly leaving.

“Your tea supply is equal in price to the cleaning supplies, broom, and linen shirt. I can only let you have the extra milk and tea. We’re in the middle of a famine and supply shortage, Levi.”

“Captain,” he warned you, and you knew the mood of your previous conversation had flew out the window. You sat up, giving him your best glare. He wasn’t thinking rationally about this at all.

“Look, Captain. I’m given only a specific amount of money per month and have to balance out needs over wants. The Scouts need food, water, and winter clothes, that’s without question. Then, because you’re an officer, you’re supposed to get one thing with the excess money. Even the Commander has given up his leather-bound journal this month because of the recent inflation, and we weren’t about to have any left-over money for budge room. Like I said, it was either your tea or the Scout’s necessities which you also use. Even so, you’re still getting an unequal four other items. For someone who’s so stuck on me following the rules, you really like to use your position to break them.” He looked like he was going to kick you right then and there. You were at the perfect height for him to do it, too.

“I need the tea.” He crossed his arms, trying to forget what you just said. He knew he was being selfish, but it was never a problem before, or rather, the previous Quartermaster was afraid to call him out on it. Maybe that’s why Erwin promoted you out of the blue, knowing you weren’t afraid to tell him.

“So, you want me to cancel the orders for cleaning supplies, the broom, the shirt, and the milk?” You saw his jaw clench. No, he didn’t want to lose those either.

“I use the tea so I can recover from lack of sleep.”

“And if you didn’t drink the volume of tea you did, you would be able to sleep. You seem to be doing just fine without it.” You gestured your hand towards him, and his eyes followed.

“Do you know why I don’t sleep, Cadet?” His voice was lower now, and it made you draw back your hand, thinking he’d probably attack that first. You’d seen him some nights when you couldn’t sleep, just sitting alone in the mess hall drinking a cup or two. Seeing his state at night, dark eyes and dark circles, you didn’t feel like it was morally right to bother him then. It always had a dark tone, whenever you looked at him at night. His head was always hanging low and his hand had a death grip on the teacup. You had an idea why he didn’t sleep.

“Is it nightmares, Captain?” You saw his hand grip the last bun hard, his movements stopping. You knew you’d gotten the right answer, but he wasn’t actually looking for you to answer. Now, he’d had to brace himself for whatever words came out of your mouth next. Were you going to call him weak? Laugh at his pain? He wouldn’t put it past you, yet you just sighed.

“If you can find me someone in Trost, I can set up a contract with them. The tea’s export tax sends the budget over. It would also be better if you permanently got rid of one thing. You could steal a broom from the supply closet, no one but me will notice.” Levi didn’t buy it.

“And then you’ll report it to Erwin again? Announce it to the cadets that I’m stealing from the closet?” You could hear the anger in his words. Who did he think you where? Sure, you’d make fun of him for other things, but not for something he couldn’t control. He could control being an asshole, but not his nightmares.

“No, I won’t, but if you keep protesting my goodwill, the deal’s off the table, Captain.” You stood up to get the horses ready to leave. He still found it annoying that his tea supply hinged on your favor, but this deal seemed much more open than the last.

It took him another month to show up in the supply room as you were auditing. The weather had gotten extremely cold, always being able to see your breath as you went outside, and you knew that it had to be a special occasion for Levi to come outside since he hated the cold. When you turned around to see him, his eyes were bloodshot, and the black circles were the thing most evident on his face. Since the blizzards came, there was no training or expeditions, so you hadn’t seen him for a while, and you wondered what he’d gone through to look like this. Was it the nightmares?

“I found somewhere in Trost that is up to my standard. Here.” His voice was tight was he thrust the contract into your hands. The signature was empty, waiting for you to put your name down, but you were about to ruin his day even more. The blizzard was eating up supplies like crazy, and firewood was quickly running out. Unable to go out and cut down trees, the supply closet’s surplus was bring used up hourly. Moreover, a group of mice had gotten in and eaten through food and clothing, causing you to make this random audit to see the damage. There wasn’t going to be any leftover money this time for him to bargain a tea contract. You almost felt guilty for having to tell him this after personally giving him the option.

“I’m sorry, Captain.” Levi noted this was the first time you’d apologized to him, but he didn’t want to take it. The nightmares got worse as the sun faded from the sky earlier and earlier. He’d run out of all the tea he could find, and now he was forced to fall asleep and wake up in a cold sweat at three or four in the morning, just to stare at the wall before he fell asleep again. When he had tea, he could get up and drink it, not afraid to fall asleep again. He needed tea, any tea.

“I’ll give up everything like you said.” You almost dropped the pencil when he said that. You’d never seen him so desperate for something and you wanted to give it to him so bad, but it was something that couldn’t be done. Not this month. No officer would be getting their personal requests.

“I’m sorry, Levi, I can’t. Not this month. No one is getting their personal requests because of the mice mishap and the snow. I-I can try next month?” He just sighed and ripped he contract out of your hands.

“Nevermind. Forget what I said.” You wanted to stop him from walking away to see if you could work it out, but he was too quick. His cape swished in the winter wind as you watched him walk back to the castle, only to be submerged in the white snow. You felt guilty that you couldn’t give him what he wanted. He was suffering, and you could see it on his face too. He probably thought you were denying him the tea just to see him suffer even more. The next few days he snapped so easily at everyone that your daily insubordination completely stopped. You would just stare at him in the mess hall, willing him with your eyes to come back and talk to you. He never looked back at you, but he knew you were staring.

“You have to get the audit done by the end of this week. It seems we’ll only have a day window for you to get to Trost and back before a big storm comes again. Can you do that with the budget?” You looked down at the list of items you procured, only for Erwin to tell you that the budget was cut down again by the Royal Government. You’d have only a day to rethink the items needed.

“Yes Commander, I can redo the budget tonight.”

It took hours to do, but you did it. Instead of outright buying new jackets, you pushed back the spring supply, and just ordered patches to be sewed on. Then, you go to work figuring out how you were going to do it. If you allotted certain funds to different types of flour, cheaper versions, and you were able to receive beans instead of meat, you could get protein without the added shipping and cooling costs. As soon as you got to the number you needed, you let out a shout that echoed through the empty mess hall. Finally!

“What are you doing up, brat?” You seized up, turning around to see him, this time in pajamas and tossed hair. He looked even worse than the other day when he came to see you.

“I could say the same to you.” You didn’t add your usual insult at the end, knowing he wouldn’t be able to stand it. It looked like he was already fighting some other demons.

“Oh, you know, slowly dying of exhaustion thanks to the Quartermaster. Nothing new.” You held in the urge to roll your eyes at him, knowing what you’d just written down on the order sheet. He wouldn’t be saying that soon. If you stayed in this room, you would probably revert back to your old ways and start a fight with him. You’d only be able to do that after the shipment came in the next two weeks. Oh, how you longed for the day you could insult him in front of the cadets at training again.

“I’ll leave you then, Captain.” His eyes seemed to light up a bit as you started to get up from the bench. He also noticed how your attitude towards him changed after your trip to Trost. Although there weren’t training sessions for you to sass him at, you would bow to him in the hallways and not talk back when he said something to egg you on at dinner. Sometimes he would catch himself missing it; discipling you just to hear your new insults the next day. While it was annoying to no end, it was refreshing. He needed to be refreshed.

“What, no snarky comment? You wouldn’t let me say something to you like that before, (Y/F/N).” You knew what he was trying to do, but you also knew the dangerous line you walked on. He was looking for something to punish you for, perhaps. Now that he knew he wasn’t getting tea, he had nothing to lose and a person he usually takes his frustrations out on right in front of him.

“No, Captain. I have to deliver this to the Commander.” You walked past the door and he grabbed your arm, making sure you didn’t leave. You looked into his eyes and for the first time in your Scouting career, you were scared of what would happen next.

“I can give it to him for you.” He looked down at the paper and you pulled it back so he couldn’t see what was on it. His bad attitude was going to ruin your surprise. He took this action as your anger.

“No, Captain. It’s fine, go get some rest.” His hand didn’t leave your arm and you glared down at it. His grip was starting to hurt and that smirk on his face was getting really annoying.

“I can’t get rest, Miss. Quartermaster, because of you.” You ripped your arm out of his grasp and his smirk grew. There it was. That’s what he was looking for. You knew you’d lost the game of keeping in your temper.

“If you keep acting like this, pretty soon you be able to walk either, Captain. Now if you’ll excuse me!” When walking to Erwin’s office, you almost erased that tea order right off the list, but you held yourself back. When Erwin went over the list to approve it, you saw him smirk over the last item, and maybe, just maybe, that made all the trouble you just went through worth it.

“He finally convinced you?” It was the first time you’d crossed your arms in front of the Commander, but it just made him laugh. He was happy you finally obliged Levi because he was almost to his wits end hearing the Captain complain about your new appointment. Hopefully, next week, he would have a happier, more alive Captain.

“No, he was just too annoying to handle anymore, Commander. I pray he won’t notice that I took off everything else he ordered, because then we’ll be back to square one.” Erwin nodded and signed the paper, making you take a breath of relief. You could go to bed and sleep in tomorrow before you’d put in the order.

“I’m sure he’ll appreciate having a tea supply back, (Y/F/N).” You just sighed and dismissed yourself to your quarters. When walking to the showers, you saw the glow of a candle still coming from the mess hall. Levi was sitting there, drinking something, scowling down at the table. It was the same scene you’d seen over and over.

You threw the small package you had at him, narrowly missing his head. He grabbed the paper, snapping his head to look at his attacker. When he saw it was you, his smirk increased. He guessed it was too tempting not to come back and torment him. At least it was something to do.

“Since the Commander even complained about your whining, you can have the rest of my tea. It’s probably not up to your high standard, Captain, but I don’t think you’re in the position to choose.”

“And I don’t think you’re in a position to have that tone with me, Cadet.” You just rolled your eyes, having a mutual understanding that he wasn’t actually going to do anything to you tonight. He saw the clothes and towel you had in your hands, and you saw how tired he was. If anything, you should be telling him to go to bed again, but you knew that he’s probably afraid to fall asleep. The tea would help tide him over till the next delivery.

“It’s Quartermaster. I swear, even if I get promoted, you’ll still call me cadet.” You turned to walk to the showers, but his next insult disappeared at your statement.

“Why don’t you want to be promoted?” He asked you outside of Trost, and you didn’t answer him. It bothered him a bit, but not enough to ask you until now. You were a perfect candidate for a leadership position in Erwin’s eyes, and Levi knew that. He just wanted to know your reasonings, that’s all.

“I don’t want to have to be in meetings with your sorry ass, Captain.” He glared at the back of your head, and you could feel it as you walked away. He even thought about throwing the tea sachet back at you, but it was too precious. He had a terrible nightmare, so he was not very excited to fall back asleep, and you basically gave him a cure all. If he was smart, he could use this tea for at least a week and maybe take a personal trip to Trost and get more. Either way, he was grateful for your change in attitude towards him, even if you’d still sass him around HQ with your words. He’d take that over nightmares. He even dismissed the idea of punishing you tomorrow for swearing at him.

Once the shipment of supplies came in the next week and you handed everyone their rations, you had your sights set on Captain Levi’s office. You knew he had a meeting with Erwin in the afternoon, and it would be easy to sneak into his office and leave the box of tea on his desk. Once you got inside, you decided to leave him a note. One last thing to piss him off before he’d see you at dinner. You’d give him a smug look all night, too, maybe even going to sit at the officer’s table and pretend to talk to Hange. No, you weren’t giving him this tea to make a point, but you still wanted him to know he’d have to be thankful to you for once. Maybe you’d even make a visit during his nightly mess hall tea break, just to emphasize your point.

Shortie,

Remember that night you bruised my arm? This is what I was doing. I expect you to bow at my feet during dinner, but it shouldn’t be hard since you’re already close to the ground.

You’re Welcome,

Quartermaster (Y/L/N)

When he found it, he smirked at the note, opening the box to see the tea he requested from the company in Trost. The note was annoying, but he couldn’t stop staring at your handwriting. You were fucking annoying too, but he couldn’t stop staring at you during dinner either, sipping a cup of tea. You’d chosen the perfect spot in front of Hange, making it easy for him to look at your features. Little did you know, he was enjoying your presence while you were trying to rub into Levi that you saved him.

“Hange, you have no idea how hard it was to get everything ordered within budget. I stayed up till three trying to figure out the math!”

“If you had half a brain, then maybe you wouldn’t have had to stay up that late, Quartermaster.” Your gaze snapped to him, glaring, but not missing the fact he called you your proper title for once.

“If I remember correctly, you were up too, Captain.”

Hange cut in, making sure that both of you atoned for how annoying you were. Every time you two were together, the constant bickering made others listening develop a headache.

“If I remember correctly, I found you two flirting in the mess hall!” She made sure to yell that out loud so that the other cadets looked at the scene she created. Everyone heard her loud and clear and Levi was about to kill her. How dare she make such accusations?!

“As if!” You crossed your arms, glaring back at Levi.

“Flirt with her?!” Hange could feel the animosity between you two, but she also noticed how red both of your faces had become.

“He’s the most annoying person I’ve ever met!”

“I am?! Have you heard yourself speak, (Y/F/N)?” You stood up, huffing in anger.

“I don’t date men shorter than me.”

“And I don’t date stuck up brats.” You gripped both of your fists and realized that if you stayed any longer, your face would get incredibly red and you’d have to throw hands with Hange, so you left with everyone watching you. Levi was now in recovery mode, glaring at all of the cadets so they would turn away in fear.

“How can you not see how annoying she is, Hange?” He took another sip of the tea that you had given him. Maybe, he’d grown to prefer whatever brew you gave him that night in the mess hall. It was minty. He liked mint.

“Mhm, Levi, sure.”

Maybe, he’d have to catch your annoying ass later tonight and ask you to order whatever personal blend you’d given him.

“Don’t look at me like that, four-eyes. Go oogle at some titans.”

Maybe, he’d catch you and start another little fight about the tea order, or force you to tell him why you didn’t want to be an officer.

“Oh, like you were “oogling” at (Y/F/N) tonight?”

Maybe.

xx this one took a LONG time to write haha I hope you like eet xx

#levi ackerman #levi ackerman x reader #attack on titan levi #levi ackerman scenario #levi ackerman x you #attack on titan #aot x reader #AoT requests #AOT headcanons #aot levi #attack on titan x reader #snk levi #snk #Captain Levi #shingeki no kyojin #shingeki no kyoujin levi

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petri808 · 3 years

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@imjustheretoseetheprivateblogs I saw your comment and although the hauntober prompts have been filled, this was the first shicca request, and technically there was still the 31st open so...

Inspired by Mashima’s Halloween shicca art:

Ever since her 18th birthday, Rebecca hated full moons. She still remembered that day perfectly as she screamed at her mother. Why didn’t you tell me?! Her mother was human, but her father whom she’d never met, had been a werecat. All the woman could say between the sobs were I’m sorry... sorry she didn’t know... sorry they didn’t know if she’d inherit the genes. Well she had, and now two years later it was still a struggle to keep living.

Everything had changed after that moment. Future goals of college, gone. A career in advertising, indefinite hold. It was difficult to find good jobs that would give her the day off every month, on a specific day, no fail because she couldn’t risk changing in front of humans. And relationships? Pfft. No way would she do what her father did to her mother, and certainly not bring a child into this world to struggle too.

She had a few friends, but none that knew about being a werecat. They just assumed Rebecca had a quirk about full moons and left it at that. Ugh! She really missed being able to socialize with people! In high school, she was popular, bubbly, a cheerleader with tons of friends. She’d dreamed of getting into advertising, maybe even becoming a social media influencer or something fun like that! Now, her life was mostly anonymous, still online, but holed up in her apartment unless she had to work. It was simply too scary to get close to people and hurt or be hurt by the sting of rejection.

Of course, the one Halloween she could have gone out despite the full moon, had to happen during a damn pandemic! All social gatherings were against the law in their city, so— no parties. Rebecca was so distraught that she’d ditched her apartment for the night and found her way to a high bluff deep in the woods, where in the far distance you could see the faint lights of the next town over. It really was a beautiful spot, quiet, serene, and perhaps because animals could sense her supernatural blood, nothing every bothered her out here.

Rebecca looks up at the large bright moon and gives it the middle finger, before pulling her legs up and wrapping her arms around them. She rests her chin on her knees. Is this really how she’ll spend the rest of her life? Miserable and alone? Maybe she should just move to some cabin way out here in the middle of nowhere...

Her ears flick back at a soft rustling sound coming from behind her. Probably just a squirrel or something... But wait?! Her nose picks up an unusual scent. Human and canine mixed together. All her extraordinary senses go on heightened alert and every hair stands up along her feline arms. Rebecca leaps to her feet, turning around just as the rustling sound stops.

A large male lands just three feet in front of her. “Hi!!”

‘Hi?!’ Rebecca’s tail flicks in irritation and her claws extended, ready for defense. “W-who are you?!” She asks the stranger. Wasn’t he scared to see a weird cat girl in the middle of a forest?! Then again, this male wasn’t exactly normal either... “What are you?”

“Name’s Shiki,” he grins, “and I’m just like you, sort of,” his head tilts as his nose sniffs the air. “Except you’re a cat and I’m a dog. Wanna be my friend?!”

Was this guy serious?! He seemed so relaxed about everything. Taller, broader in chest, and while she still held onto some human features after the change, this male was much more wolf-like in appearance. “Um. I’m Rebecca. How are you so happy? Don’t you hate being like, um a werewolf?”

“Doesn’t bother me,” he shrugs and plops down into a cross legged position. “My mom and grandpa are werewolves too, so it’s just part of the family. What about you?”

“I hate it.”

“Why?”

“Why?! Because it ruined my life, that’s why! I mean look at me! I have to hide away this ugly body from the world,” Rebecca gestures wildly at the sky, “because of that stupid full moon!”

“I don’t see an ugly body. You have a nice body.”

“What?” Her arms drop instantly but cross against her chest. She didn’t want to call him an idiot, but their definitions of beauty differed. “Where exactly are you from, Shiki, was it?”

“That town way over there,” he points to the lights.

“But that’s 15 miles away! Do you normally travel this far on these nights?”

“Not really, but two months ago I picked up on your scent and was curious to see who you were. There’s not many of us Werepeople around so I was surprised to find another so close by,” he grins, “and a pretty girl at that. Must be my lucky moon.”

This time Rebecca couldn’t hide the blush that steals away on her cheeks. Twice this guy had complimented her appearance, but she just wasn’t used to hearing such things. She’d been so focused on the loss of her human life that she targeted all of her hate and anger towards this body, which wasn’t as ugly as she wanted to believe. Plus, calling herself ugly meant she had to call Shiki ugly too and for a werewolf, he wasn’t all that bad looking. Perhaps...

Her voice softened, hesitant but hopeful, while her eyes glance towards the ground. “You really think so?”

“Heck yeah!” He bounces to his feet and grabs her hands, tail wagging like the happiest puppy in the world! “You should come meet my family! They’ll so love you!”

Rebecca’s eyes pop open wide. “N-Now?!” But, it’s late and she works in the morning, and...

“Why not?” He scoops her up against his chest. “15 minutes tops! Hold on!”

Rebecca squeals and quickly wraps her arms around his neck, gripping to the collar of his shirt as his powerful hind legs leap from the cliff. “Shiki!!! Are you crazy?!” They barely just met! And okay, it was awesome to meet someone else like her, but how did she know he wasn’t some crazed killer? How was he so sure she could trusted?

When he hits the forest floor below, he looks down at Rebecca with the widest, brightest smile to rival the moon itself that sent heart leaping. “Trust me.”

And so, she did...

#hauntober #shicca #Halloween #free prompt #shicca fan fic #shicca fan fiction #shikirebe #edens zero #hiro mashima #hiro mashima art

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andrea-lyn · 4 years

Text

gregory manes gets a drinking buddy (and a friend)

“Come on, Evans, I need a drink.” The liquor store is closed, and it’s too long of a drive to get to Planet 7 or Saturn’s Ring. The Pony is his only option, but the door is locked and Max Evans keeps standing there like a bouncer and not a bartender. Doesn’t he understand? Can’t he see that Greg needs a whiskey or three? Maybe if he drowns his guilt and his regrets and worries below the weight of the liquor, he won’t have to think about it. God knows he’s not sleeping, so what else is he supposed to do? “C’mon, man,” Greg pleads, more desperately. “It’s past two, no liquor store’s open and I need a drink.” His voice breaks and he knows how desperate he sounds, but he’s sober. Him falling apart has nothing to do with alcohol and everything to do with the nightmares he sees behind his eyes when he closes them. The scuffle on the ground, the desperation in Alex’s voice, the sound of a gunshot echoing, his father’s blood on the ground. His father. When he closes his eyes, he sees Jesse’s blood flowing out of a bullet hole. The residue of gunpowder on Gregory’s hands, physical evidence that he finally protected Alex. The relief, from both Alex and Michael’s faces helps most nights, but not all of them. Tonight, it’s not doing the trick.

Tonight, he needs the help of whiskey. “Look, I gotta clean up and do the tills with Maria out of town,” Max says apologetically, “which means I can’t serve you anything. If you’re really desperate, though, I know a place you can go.” Greg’s desperate enough to try anything. “Hit me.” That’s how Gregory Manes ends up at Sanders’ Junkyard, standing outside an Airstream, not sure why Max sent him here. His car is a couple feet back, but Max said specifically to come to the Airstream if he wanted to get a drink, so here he is. “You should really know better than to try to stay at the Pony beyond closing. Even I couldn’t manage with the owner, and she and I were dating.” Greg whirls to find Michael Guerin sitting in a beaten-up folding chair beside a fire pit a few yards away. He’s not really sure where to start with any of this. Did Max send him here on purpose? Maria and Guerin were dating? Besides all that, he’s still struggling to understand what Guerin's doing in a junkyard. His confusion must make Guerin feel sorry for him, because he hooks a lawn chair with his ankle and drags it over. “Here,” Guerin says, leaning down into a cooler to hand him a beer. “You’ve got these for life from me, in my gratitude.” Greg wanders closer and takes the beer, not sure where to start, so he figures he’ll go with the low-hanging fruit that Guerin already offered. “You said you and DeLuca broke up?” “Yeah,” Guerin admits, pressing his lips together as he looks away. “It’s complicated.” “It didn’t have anything to do with CrashCon, did it?” Greg feels the guilt creeping back in to sit on him like a weight, but Guerin scoffs and shakes his head. “You mean, does it have anything to do with what you did for me and Alex? No,” he says firmly. “No, I think we both realized that as much as we made each other happy, we didn’t make each other happiest. I wanted her to want the same things I did and she wanted the same, we just never met in the middle.” The breath Greg lets out feels like it untangles a knot in his stomach. “Good, cuz I’m not sure I was ready to deal with a broken relationship on top of the…” He can’t even say it. It dies in his throat. “I’m the reason my mother died.” Greg’s attention snaps up. “Uh,” he echoes, “From the files I read, I am 99% sure that my father’s torture of aliens is that reason.” After he’d shot Jesse, Alex had handed him boxes of files, probably to try and make him feel better about what he’d done. The thing is, it had, to a degree. “I’m the one who cracked the glass, set off the failsafe,” Michael says darkly. “You were protecting Alex. I was trying to get to my mother, and I got nothing out of it. What you did, Greg, it wasn’t a bad thing. He was an asshole and Alex isn’t sitting at home crying tears about this. I think,” he amends. “I guess Forrest knows better these days, huh,” is his quietly bitter remark. “Alex likes him.” “I know. It’s why I spend my nights drinking here and not at the Pony,” Guerin insists. “It’s his turn to have something and if we get another shot, I’m gonna take it, but I’m not ruining this one. Alex deserves happiness.” “He does,” Greg agrees, glad they’re aligned on that. “The things my father did to Alex when we were kids…” Guerin’s gone tight, like he’s not sure he wants to hear what Greg has to say. He swallows, and then says, “What kind of things?” “There’s only a few years between all four of us. We all went to the same schools, knew the same people, and we all knew what Dad was doing to Alex after Mom left. We should have done more, we should have said something, we should have stood in the way. I told Alex that it’s time to let go of it, let other people carry it for him, and I meant it,” he insists, impassioned, “but....” But, what? But Greg hadn’t expected to become a murderer to do it? He hadn’t thought he’d have to kill his father to protect his baby brother? “You wondering how you’re gonna carry this?” Mute, Greg nods. “I don’t regret it,” he says firmly. “I think maybe that’s worse. I should feel bad. I should regret what I did, but I don’t. My father was a monster, and maybe Alex was the one who saw his worst face, but I only knew a fraction of what he did and I wanted to get away. I killed him to protect Alex.” “And me?” Guerin quips. “Alex,” Greg reiterates. “You dying at Jesse’s hand would’ve broken him, new boyfriend or not.” Guerin goes quiet, no witty retort ready for that. “Look, man, you’re probably one of the best people outside of Alex I know. I can tell you what not to do,” he admits. “I’m pretty much the best evidence of that. Don’t spiral into beer and whiskey. Don’t fuck your way through town. Don’t instigate every bar fight you can to end up locked in jail.” Those aren’t exactly things that had been on Greg’s to-do list, so he thinks he can handle it. “I don’t want to put this on Alex,” Greg admits. “You, me, and him. We’re the only ones who know what happened that night and he doesn’t need to hear about how I hate that I became a murderer to do the right thing.” “So don’t.” “What?” “Don’t put it on Alex,” Guerin says. “You said it. You, him, and me.” Greg stares at him in confusion past the flickering firelight. “What are you saying?” “I’m saying that I know what it’s like to have a burden on your shoulders that feels so heavy that you think it might break you. Like I said, I am the poster child for fucking it up, but I’m trying to put that behind me and maybe this is part of it.” Suddenly, Greg gets it. His laugh feels hollow, but only because he really didn’t expect this, of all things. “Drinking buddies,” he says, “where I can talk about how heavy the weight of killing my father feels.” “So long as you’re not complaining about the beer selection, I think I can give you an ear and advice based on years of doing the wrong thing.” Greg closes his eyes and there’s his father’s body on the ground, same as it always is his nightmares. Okay, then. Drinking and sharing buddies with his brother’s ex. There are weirder things in the world -- hell, there are weirder things in Roswell. Why not? “Start at the beginning?” Guerin gestures to him. “Start wherever you want, man. It’s your story.” Greg nods and when he finds his words, he starts by telling Guerin about the gun, the weight of it, and the relief when the smoke cleared. He talks about the blood, about all of it, and about seeing Alex’s face and the relief there that made it okay. He talks a lot, that night, until Guerin finds him a blanket and a lounger to crash on. It’s not all of it. It’s not going to instantly make it better, but it feels good to talk to someone else who’d been there. Maybe he doesn’t have to do this alone. Maybe he just needs to figure out how to carry this load. Here, in the junkyard, that’s where he’s going to start.

#roswell new mexico #gregory manes #michael guerin #coping bros #fic #post-s2

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spiderdiva · 4 years

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Yandere Alastor x Reader again cuz y’all bitches got taste and a hoe can appreciate that

Can’t have my writing without a proper title, eh?

My last piece got some good attention and everyone wants me to write more. Imma tell you right now that this isn’t really a continuation. I don’t wanna bind myself to a series, I just wanna write some fucked up shit sometimes. Sometimes they may blend together in a way that refers to past writings, sometimes maybe not, idk and idc, Imma just write some shit and y’all’re gonna like it, mkay?~

The last one was kinda tame, wasn’t it? Yeah. I’m goin into this one hopin to get more fucky. Bonus points! I had a friend give me an idea or two, so buckle in and get ready for the ride you kinky fucks, cuz here we go!

Disclaimer : this is not kinky. Alastor is Ace and I’m already pushin lines makin him romo

Word Count : 3189

Basics : Some fuckin dickbag is out and harassing you. Alastor, who watches your every move, has decided he no longer will stay idly by while his Darling is bombarded by bitchfuckery. Instead, he pulls you down to his lair and shows you how much he loves you.

WARNINGS : Gore, stalking, harassment/catcalling mention, cannibalism, murder

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Hell was a place where sinners came to rot; that was common knowledge. This, however, did not mean you weren’t fed up with all the assholes that existed around you. No matter what, it was like you couldn’t go out in public without being catcalled, hit on, fetishized. You could be wearing something modest, something prude even, and demons would still call out to you and heavily imply that they’d like nothing more than to see you a mess beneath them.

Sometimes implication was a generous word to use.

It was a never-ending cycle, one you felt would drag you down further and further until your morality truly wore away and you were left with a body count and a reputation to boot. Your body tensed as you smiled politely at the catcallers, just wanting to move through their words as quickly as possible. Retaliation could be dangerous, not to mention it’d make the interaction last that much longer. Smiling politely and continuing your journey towards your destination seemed like the safest bet.

While you were merciful to these people, Alastor was not. He had absolutely no patience for these people that acted as though they owned you. They bragged about you with their friends, made obscene gestures and comments. Their minds were full of you and he hated it. It made his stomach wretch, twisting into a harsh knot that made his body shake with rage.

He took to disposing of them. While he often liked working from a distance, sitting back and sipping tea as his shadows and eldritch creatures pulled these vile creatures apart, sometimes what they did was so disgusting that he had to get up close and personal with the perpetrator.

Today was one of those days.

He put his hands on you… He came up behind you as you were standing in a store, idly mulling over some options for dinner later that night, and you froze. You didn’t dare move as his hands ran down from the edge of your ribs to the tip of your hip bones. His voice was low and gruff in your ear, the hot breath of his words brushing against your neck…

And then it all stopped.

You heard a shocked scream, felt his presence completely disappear, and it all stopped.

You feared that maybe something worse was going to be behind you, but when you turned, you just saw Alastor, clenching his fist tightly as his essence ebbed with hatred. Blood steadily dripped from his palm down his wrist, into his shirt sleeve where it soaked into the fabric beneath. Dark shadows-looking tentacles came up from a hole in the ground, squeezing and constricting your perpetrator, covering his mouth and eyes. His screams of terror were weakened by his lack of air, so much so that even without the muffling he’d be almost unheard.

When Alastor had noticed you turned around, his gaze softened, fist unclenching a little bit. Before you knew it, the entire shebang was gone. No man. No tentacle shadow monsters. Just you and Alastor in the middle of the soup aisle.

“Y/N!” He nearly gasped, “are you alright, my dear? Did he hurt you?”

He came closer to you, gentle hands hovering just above your body, not wanting to shake you up further.

You shook your head no. “No, I’m fine,” you sighed, “he just… Scared me…”

“Rightly so! He had his filthy hands all over you!”

You shrunk away. Alastor’s face fell into a concerned frown.

“Can I show you something, darling?”

You looked up at him, curiosity in your eyes. “Sure, Alastor, what’s up?”

His smile was back, as though it had never left. He offered you his hand, which you took with a curious smile. Before you could process it, you were no longer in the soup aisle with Alastor, but in a very dark room, where a man sat locked in a cage in the back right corner.

The room was made of cement. No carpet. No paint for the walls. It was dark and grey, with stains littering the floor. There were drains, specifically around the lines of cages, used for who knew what. Chains dangled from the walls. A table sat in the very back corner across from the cages, with a large wooden cabinet of sorts sitting beside it. Closed and locked.

The room should have filled you with dread. If not the room, the cries and pleas for mercy resonating loudly from within the metal bars. Neither of these, however, phased you in the slightest.

“I’ve taken up a hobby of sorts,” Alastor began, moving forward into your view. You watched him, your attention pulled to how his form looked in the darkness. He flicked on a light, and the room was flooded with yellow, the buzzing from the bulb enough to drive anyone crazy if they were here long enough. Alastor seemed to enjoy it. “I’d taken a bit of a notice to the people that surround you and I’ve found that many of them are vile…” His gaze rested on the man in the corner, who was desperately gripping the bars of his prison and shouting. “For your benefit, I’ve taken to disposing of these vile creatures, being certain that they could never hurt you ever again…”

You watched with wonder as Alastor’s tongue swept across his lips. Despite the implications of evil, you were actually rather endeared by this. One of the most powerful demons in all of Hell was going around and keeping you safe and happy, even when you didn’t know it. He did it not to impress you, but out of the genuine desire to keep you safe… That was sweet! Your heart fluttered at the thought.

“You do that for me…?” You asked softly, hands coming up to clasp in front of your chest shyly as your face flushed a soft rose.

Alastor looked back at you, his essence softening as he took you in. “Of course, my dear, you are without a doubt the most important thing in my life… Nothing will ever taint that if I have anything to say about it.” He brought his hand to your face, his fingers curled under your chin and his thumb just below your eye, gently rubbing back and forth mindlessly as he took a moment to just look at you. “If you would stay with me… I would protect you… I could do a much better job if you let me be with you, let me take care of you. I could keep you safe, keep you home. You’d be fed, entertained, loved… Everything you could ever need could be found here, with me.”

That sounded wonderful… Your better judgement may have been suggesting that this could be dangerous, but you couldn’t find it within you to care. You liked Alastor - a lot! And a life with him, being cared for and treated as his most prized possession, sounded like everything you could ever dream of! He would never mistreat you, or hurt you, or make advances like the others in Hell did. He would do your shopping and protect you from all the badness of Hell while you sat back and basked in the easy life. The life of being loved and cherished by an overlord.

“What’s the catch…?” You asked. There had to be something he wanted. He, however, looked shocked you’d ask such a thing.

“There is no catch, my love. You being with me is all I want.”

“Really?”

“Really and truly! Though I would perhaps appreciate cooking meals with you, or occasionally pulling someone apart together.”

A soft laugh bubbled from deep within your chest. “Oh, is that so?”

Alastor nodded, almost too excited by the idea of you pulling apart your predators. “We can start with this one, if you’d like!”

Both of you looked over to the man in holding, who was now sitting against the furthest corner of his cage. A sick sort of excitement stirred within you; you’d love to.

Alastor could tell by your smile that you wanted nothing more than to dispose of this fucker, and so without another word he pulled you by the hand to the prison in the back.

“Today’s your lucky day!~” He called to the man, who looked up at him slowly. “Your fate has been decided by the lovely [Y/N], and it has been chosen that you are to be ripped apart and eaten raw! Isn’t that exciting?”

You did not say that, but you weren’t opposed to it, either. You kind of yearned to see him with blood down his chin.

The locks fell from the doors, the man trying everything he could to get as far away from the both of you as possible. The sharp clacking of Alastor’s shoes resonated within the cell. You followed close behind.

Radio static began to fill your ears, whipping and zirring between the three of you as a red glow emanated from the overlord beside you. Symbols danced in the air, and your mind felt almost fuzzy from the overdose of power you were surrounded by. The man in front of you was once again captured by shadowy tendrils, pulled taught and spread into a star position so you could see everything. He hovered just above the ground, pulling uselessly at his confines.

Alastor came up behind you, one hand resting gently on the shoulder opposite of his face. He was close, but not in a way that made you feel uncomfortable. In a way that made you feel safe. His voice was low beside you, a sort of voice you’d never heard before from him. It was warm, full of presence, and tender. His hand swept above the victim’s thigh, drawing your attention and displaying the appendage to you. “You see, [Y/N], your focus must remain on the meaty parts. He has a lot of muscle, so he may be a bit tough to cut. This, however, won’t be much of a problem. We have all day, after all~” He bit his lip. His hunger was flaring. Mouth watering. And he’d be able to spend this dinner with you, of all people. It was the closest he’d ever see to Heaven.

You watched eagerly as he talked you through each piece. What everything tasted like, what it felt like, comparing it to common meats and igniting hunger in you as well. You hadn’t ever been a cannibal, but he was making it all sound so appetizing. You were eager to try it.

“Wait right here,” Alastor said softly, pressing a gentle kiss to the side of your head. Your heart skipped a beat as he stood, face flushing a dark red. You could feel your breath hitch, feel your skin tingle where he kissed. It was intoxicating. You didn’t even notice he came back with a hacksaw and a tool kit until he pulled your attention to it.

“Have you ever used one of these before?”

You shook your head no. He smiled in return.

The saw was gently pressed into your hand, and he guided you above the conjunction of the man’s leg and torso. Alastor’s hand was over yours, his front pressed against your back, like he was teaching you to paint.

“You want to move your hand like this as you cut. It keeps things clean.” He demonstrated with you, just above the flesh. You nodded, and he brought the blade down. “Cut here, but not yet. The clothing will make it difficult.”

Hell forbid he’d make you see this man naked. He pulled a tool from his kit: a small knife that he used to tear the seams of the pants where you needed to cut. The wide opening, the peek of flesh, the saw blade just above the tender skin… It was exciting.

“There. Now.” He repositioned himself behind you, taking his place once more with his hand on yours. His gentle hand guided yours downwards, touching metal to flesh and beginning to saw back and forth.

The man’s screams should have deterred you, but you could barely hear them over the sound of your own heartbeat. Your skin felt warm, especially where Alastor rested against you. You fit in his grasp so perfectly… Being surrounded by him… His smell… His feeling… His breath gentle against your neck while his head tucked between your shoulder and cheek. It was nothing short of bliss.

Blood spilled to the floor, but it didn’t ignite fear within you. Screams flooded your ears, but they were like a distant melody as you sat here, in his arms. Safe. You could even hear him humming a little tune! He was completely at peace, and so were you. You hadn’t even noticed when the appendage fell, when the saw jumped and it was done. When had you gone through the bone? How long had it been? You had no idea, you just knew that you were done with that part.

“Wonderful job, my dear,” he said softly beside you. He had no need to shout, he was right where he needed to be. He nuzzled into your neck. Your heart fluttered. “We aren’t done yet, though. We have so much more to harvest~”

You nodded, then looked at your work. Blood was gushing everywhere, and the screams were louder now. You hadn’t noticed how much your victim had been squirming.

“He’s being quite a handful, isn’t he?” Alastor asked, once again apart from you to dig through his tool kit. “Would you like to sedate him, my love? Or should we keep him completely aware of the world around him? Both have their pros and cons, but I’ll let you decide.”

“Leave him be,” you said eyes raking over him, “I don’t want to offer a moment’s relief.”

Alastor smiled at you, pulling a knife from his box. “Leave him be it is~”

The blade of his knife cut smoothly though the fabric of the man’s shirt. It glided quickly up the center, revealing his stomach.

“The insides here are important, too. Perfectly delicious if prepared right! I may have a preference more towards the flesh itself, but I can’t deny a good liver when I see one! Let’s work on that next, hm? Before he passes out from blood loss~”

It felt out of order, but… You agreed. Sometimes learning to torture meant that you had to skip around on the one leg two leg right arm left ordeal and go right to where it counted.

“Would you like to do the honors, my dear?” He offered you the knife and you nodded.

Taking it in your hand felt like a deal with the devil. Your eyes flicked over to your victim, who was whimpering and crying, beginning to see his own consciousness slip between his fingers. You felt hyperfocused, like the world around you slowed as you pressed the knife into his stomach.

“Careful, love! Try not to puncture anything!~” Alastor was collecting the leg, undressing it from the rest of the pant leg and pulling meat off of it with his claws, only to promptly pop it into his mouth. “The shtomach’sh one of the besht partsh!”

You smiled over your shoulder, nodding in understanding, before continuing a little more carefully this time.

His stomach split open when you cut to a certain point, the tight pull of the skin giving up rather quickly and revealing his insides most beautifully. Alastor looked very pleased. His eyes shone with excitement, the leg set to the side as he crawled over to you. “Lookat that! A perfect cut! What a fine specimen, too! Ahh, he looks delicious…” His claw ran over the man’s stomach, turning the organ a bit to look it over. “Not a scratch… How wonderful! You’re a natural, [Y/N]!”

You beamed excitedly, like a student to a professor. “You mean it?”

“Well look at it! Does it look damaged to you?”

You poked your nose into it, hovering above the glistening red organs and trying to find something out of place. Alastor’s hand came into view, pulling the insides apart and allowing you to really look at them. More cries of pain rang in the back of your mind. You were far too fascinated by what was in front of you to notice.

He was right, ultimately. No matter what he pulled out, or what angle he held it at, you noticed that nothing was damaged. Nothing appeared to be leaking or gushing from within, they just pulsed with the fleeting life of the man they belonged to.

“You haven’t eaten yet…” Alastor pointed out, a bit of a pout to his voice. “Here, try this.” He broke a piece off of the man’s small intestine. There was now much more of a mess than there was before. He held it out for you, and with only a moment’s hesitation, you leaned forward and took it in your mouth.

The flavor was mild… It wasn’t a heavy meaty taste, and it was a little chewy. You couldn’t say you hated the taste, though, and knowing who it belonged to somehow seemed to add flavor. It was exciting; the flavor of mania burst in the back of your tastebuds as you remembered what this asshole did to you, and what you were now doing to him. Your eyes closed and you hummed contentedly. It was delicious.

Alastor took to your reaction kindly, taking new bits of organs and flesh and feeding them to you like you were both loitering around the snack table of a buffet. You tasted everything he offered you, enjoying each one more and more, until finally he came to the heart. He hummed as his finger pressed against the organ. The man had passed out long ago from shock and blood loss. He was barely alive at this point.

You followed his gaze, then smiled, pulling his hand from inside and kissing his knuckles before you reached in yourself, hands resting on the rib cage before you yanked backwards with all your might, snapping one after the other from its place.

Alastor watched with wide eyes, half shocked, half curious. He made no move to stop you, only watch. When you cleared enough, you reached in for the heart, gently taking it in your hand and pulling it from its connectors with a delicate sort of carefulness.

You held the treat between you. It sat between both of your hands, blood drenching you to your elbows. Alastor smiled warmly, placing one of his hands on one side of the organ. You moved so that one of your hands could take the other side. Together, you raised it upwards and tore it in two, eyes locked together in a daydreamy sort of love as you rode the same wavelength. He pressed his half to your lips. You pressed your half to his. You both took a tender bite out of the organ, the unmistakable flavor of love washing over your taste buds as all was right in the world once more.

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#Alastor #Alastor x Reader #Yandere #Hazbin Hotel #Fanfiction #Yandere!Alastor #I hope y'all like this one as much as I do cuz I think it's real cute #Once again if you're reading the tags before the piece I don't write like I talk #XOX Angel #Angel's Writing

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kinetic-elaboration · 3 years

Text

July 28: 3x01 Spock’s Brain

Today’s ep was the infamous Spock’s Brain. I’d never seen it before and always insisted I didn’t want to but...this is a complete rewatch so I guess I kinda had to.

As predicted, it was bad. Utter nonsense for a premise and the actual execution shot through with sexism. There were some aspects that I did like but most of them have been done better by other eps--and in any case were not worth the ridiculous basis of the ep itself. Honestly, if I were watching all this live, and I waited months for this, I might have wondered if the show weren’t better off cancelled.

But I would have been wrong because the next ep is The Enterprise Incident so! Sometimes you just need to be patient.

This episode is starting out so strangely. Why is the bridge being shot from all these weird angles? And why do the colors seem...duller?

They really can spy on these other ships, huh?

“My name is Captain James Kirk.” Not breaking out the middle initial today, I see.

Chapel going for the drama as she falls down.

Kirk too, sprawled over his chair. (Makes me think of “The chair is, in fact, not bolted to the ground.”)

This honestly reads like a bad parody of Star Trek.

Ridiculous lines include: “His brain is gone.” “His incredible Vulcan physique.” “In search of his brain.” “Where are you going to look for his brain?” “It was taken out, it can be put back in.”

“Spock’s body is more dependent on his brain” than a human’s. Ummmm I feel like there’s something suspicious in there.

The only good thing about this ep is Kirk’s devotion to Spock.

Seriously why does the bridge look so different? Filming it from a different location changes everything.

When Kirk paces in front of the view screen, it really shows off how small it is.

“The spaceship that has Spock’s brain.”

I like these schematics and Chekov’s little presentation here. Also Kirk can automatically put years to all the planet evolution codes or whatever--like on the one hand, of course he can, that’s his job, but on another... what a nerd.

Honestly these people--obviously, they are underground on the ice planet. Obviously!!! I actually do appreciate this scene in general, with the bridge crew working out a problem on the bridge, which actually almost never happens--it’s definitely the best scene of the ep--but still. It’s obviously the ice planet.

Also, I like that Uhura gets to contribute. She thinks outside of the box, asks the good questions. Don’t just look at the outside evolution of the planet--ask about what the brain could be used for, and where it might be.

“Get there, find the brain.”

Oh no, he accidentally called Scotty Spock :(

“High of 40. Livable.” I realize this is a Russian joke but that’s really not that bad lol. Definitely not an ice age anymore.

“They give pain and delight.” So they’re dominatrixes?

“You are small.” Well no need to be mean about it.

Don’t you have a companion?? Love that that’s one of their synonyms for “spouse” or “partner.”

The alien men look like they’re wearing short jean skirts.

“A dead and buried city on a planet in a glacial age.” That’s a good idea. Could have done something better with that.

Chekov’s still stuck on the no women thing, I think.

Why did they dress Spock in a leftover outfit from This Side of Paradise?

McCoy and his stimulants again, waking up the alien lady after they stunned her. Multi-purpose.

“I know nothing about a brain.” Clearly.

So all the women live below ground, and all the men live above...

Ah-ha, they have found Spock’s voice.

“There is a definite pleasurable experience connected with the hearing of your voice.” This ep is almost worth it for that line.

Also Kirk’s face when he hears Spock’s voice.

I like that Spock is still funny. Honestly he’s probably funnier disembodied. This is a very humorous Spock characterization. “That is a practical idea. It seems unlikely that I shall be able to get to you.”

WHAT IS BRAIN.

They’re being quite sexist, aren’t they? “No engineering geniuses here. Only women. None of these women could ever have done surgery on Spock’s brain.” Like I know it’s that they’re obviously (or supposedly obviously) naive and childlike but like combining that with the sex segregated society and the actual phrasing of these lines (WOMEN?? Engineers?? Doctors??) plus Kirk assuming the Controller is a man (who says?) all creates this like definite sexist vibe while watching. Ugh make it stop.

How can Spock’s brain control everything? They’ve only had it for 5 minutes.

“Mistress.” I told you they were dominatrixes.

Oh yeah Captain Sulu!!

More sexist quotes: “What a way to maintain control over a man.” “I’ve certainly noticed their delightful aspects.” Please stop talking; you’re digging yourselves in a deeper hole.

(Seriously though--I feel like the unspoken world building fact here is that the women need the men for procreation specifically, which is why they capture the men, and then control them--using the “pain belts”--to have sex--the “pleasure.” They probably also use them for other labor, given the presence of the male guards and the line “they won’t help us if we don’t control them” or whatever it was. But surely the delightfulness of the women is more than their physical appearance, is what I’m saying.)

What is the commentary on gender here? Women = scary, dumb, and hot?

Yeah, how DOES Spock’s brain fit into this?

Lol at Spock’s empty body calmly watching them all fighting.

“Science will triumph.” A real lost opportunity in the AOS-verse to have Kirk say this after a bar brawl.

“You are a disembodied brain.” I feel like there’s a (McCoy) joke in here about how he’s reached his ideal state.

His body is the building. (I was right, I totally called this plot point as soon as Spock started talking about his incredibly large body and how his brain was still doing things like regulating oxygen. I must say... this is not a bad idea, except for the brain stealing part. Like there’s something in there, the idea of the complex as a body, powered by a brain. Idk.)

So basically Spock is taking another opportunity to insult Bones’ medical skills. Oh Spock, never change.

I feel like Bones is enjoying his Spock puppet, on some level.

“Pain bands.”

Use the Spock puppet, Kirk! Use it to fight the lady alien!

“The controller is young and powerful, perfect.” / “How very flattering.” LOL I can’t believe this is real.

“You took his brain. You will put it back.”

So the alien lady puts on the spiky helmet and now she’s suddenly smart. I hate thissssssssssss.

(I actually do think the idea of old knowledge stored outside of the... brains...of the current generation, for their own protection, as decided by the paternalist elders... is not itself a bad concept. Of course it’s also a concept that other eps did better, like The Apple or For the World is Hollow or even Return of the Archons. Again, combining it with all the gross things they said about women earlier just leaves a bad taste. Even though--even though!!--we don’t know who the elder people were. Like, was this a matriarchal society that saved the women in the underground because they were better? Or was it a patriarchal society that put the women in the underground because they were considered weak and in need of protection? I rather assumed the second, but I think there’s some evidence for the first, in particular, that the story reeks of Sexualized Male Fear. What’s a better combination of hot and scary than a matriarchy of women in short skirts?)

“Got your gun.” (But the other way around.)

“Our need for the Controller is more important than your need for your friend.” That sounds an awful lot like “The needs of the many outweigh needs of the one” and we all know what Kirk thinks about that. That said, he’s really not...engaging with her facially fair argument at all.

“No one may kill a man. Not for any purpose. It cannot be condoned.”

Love Scotty’s acting skills. Gotta get this gun back really fast--create a diversion by fainting! But not too much!

I do love McCoy. He’s an adventurer too. He pretends he’s not but he jumps at the chance to discover and learn. He will not hesitate to put himself in danger if it’s for the common good or to protect his friends.

“Put the teacher on.”

Now finally Kirk is engaging with the fate of the society he’s encountered lol. Like, again, he’s not wrong; they’ve stagnated under the computer/controller and it’s not moral to steal from someone else to keep your comfortable and boring life going when you could just do the work yourself, but coming this late, it feels like an afterthought. It’s also weird that she just like stood by and let them take Spock and his brain after all that to do about...not letting them have the brain. Like at the end of the day she was not so inept. Also, they never explained what happens to all the knowledge in the teacher. One would assume they’d have to access it--or not? They’re just to start from scratch? Also legit I guess. And finally... all I can really hear, in the emphasis on integrating with the men again, is “You’ll learn how to develop a society naturally and also about heterosexual sex wink wink.” (Except that as I said... I think they know about that.)

I see McCoy’s regretting that “child’s play” talk now.

“Give priority to reconnecting Spock’s vocal cords.” Yep that’s how the brain works for sure.

Wow Spock really does have to do everything himself. Including operate on himself.

“This Vulcan is telling me how to operate.”

How did he operate without...opening Spock’s skull... in any way??

Not to question the verisimilitude of Spock’s Brain lol.

Everyone’s being so rude--Spock is providing valuable last minute exposition/explanation about this weird-ass society!

It’s always odd when they don’t return to the bridge. Like, they’re not going to collect Chekov?

That was... something.

I liked a few things: any excuse for Kirk to be devoted to Spock; the humor Spock showed; I liked the bridge scene where they looked at the map of the planets; and I liked certain things about the premise of the episode, although, like I said, most of the general aspects (post-disaster society, reliance on computers, etc.) had been done better in other episodes. I liked the look into the Male Brain lol.

What I didn’t like was how outright ridiculous the basic catalyzing event was--Spock’s brain has been literally stolen like??? Are you kidding me? That led to a considerable amount of dialogue that read like a Star Trek parody. Did not like that. And of course, as I said... the sexism. I think I’ve unpacked that enough. It didn’t need to be sexist, and you can explain it in a way that’s not, but the vibe sure was. It was like... well a lot of TOS is like this imo. You can give it an A (or at least a B) for effort, but what comes out is so obviously tainted by the sexism of the creators. Like, for example, how they say they believe in women who are just as capable and professional as men, but struggle to show it. This ep wanted to show a matriarchal society but it wasn’t really a matriarchal society--it was a Freudian dream that was all about the male psyche and what it most fears and wants.

All that said.. the next ep is a D.C. Fontana creation featuring one of my favorite TOS Ladies, the Female Romulan Commander, so I will be receiving a consolation prize.

Also the AOS verse is still more sexist and doesn’t have an excuse I said what I said.

#the year 2021 #2021: star trek #2021: fandom thougts #star trek tos

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heartfulselkie · 3 years

Text

New Fic WIP

Sooooo I’m writing yet another Miraculous Ladybug fanfic because I have a problem. Don’t know when I’ll get the first chapter uploaded but it will be on my AO3 for sure when it’s ready. I’m considering posting chapters to my blog too, since I’m not planning for it to be as explicit as Penumbra.

So! Here’s a WIP snippet below of the new fic if anyone’s interested.

Citrus and Lavender

“Target acquired.” Alya sniggered, “The Sunflower is in sight. Deploying the Fair Maiden!” “Wait - fair what?!” Marinette squeaked, “Wha - hold on - Alya!”

She tried to dig her heels into the ground, but Alya still managed to push her forwards until Marinette was left standing in plain view of the school’s entrance. When she looked over her shoulder to argue, Alya had already retreated back behind the stone wall that lined the edge of the steps. She was about to cry abandonment when someone else called out to her.

“Marinette!”

She whipped her head around, her body freezing solid again as she saw Adrien bounding down the steps towards her. Was it possible for someone’s heart to beat at the speed of sound? Cause it certainly felt hers was damn sure trying! What had been a gentle blush had now ignited into an outrageous scarlet across her face as Adrien approached her with a sunny grin.

“Hey!” he greeted casually, his breath visible in the cold air as he spoke, “I thought it was you. What are you doing here? I thought you’d have gone home after class finished.”

Marinette stared at him like a brain dead goldfish, suddenly finding herself lost in the gentle shine of his eyes as he looked at her. Marinette.exe has stopped responding. System shutdown.

Adrien’s grin fell to a shy smile when she hadn’t answered him, “Marinette?”

The sound she made could have only been described as when one lets out a tiny amount of air from a balloon. A quiet, drawn out squeak that was painfully awkward.

“Sorry. Did I catch you at a bad time?” Adrien ducked his head slightly as he nervously rubbed the back of his neck.

Say something! She urged herself, He’ll leave if you don’t say something!

“Alya!” Marinette announced louder than she intended, making him jump, “I wa-was studying Alya! I mean - with Alya of course. We libraried in the study!”

Adrien stared at her for a moment before letting out a soft laugh, “I see. Did Alya leave already?”

“No...I mean yes! She’s gone. Long gone. Just me. Here. Hello.”

Again Adrien smiled at her. It was gentle yet somehow enigmatic, like he was thinking about something but was purposefully holding it back. Her heart was doing a whole circus performance in her chest as she basked in his kind expression, finding herself once again wordless and breathless. She looked down at the box of macaroons waiting in her hands.

I had some of these for while we studied but there’s some left over. Would you like some? Oh, passionfruit is your favourite? I had no idea!

It was as easy as that, right? She just had to offer him the box, maybe offer to make him more if he likes them. Maybe mention going to the movies sometime. Easy. ...Right? She just had to unglue her tongue from the roof of her mouth first.

“Well, I’d better go meet up with my bodyguard.” Adrien sighed another warm cloud into the cold air, “He’ll be waiting to pick me up. I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Morrow...to...uh…” Marinette stuttered.

Adrien smiled at her once more as he turned to leave, giving her a small wave of his hand. He was leaving. He was going to leave and she hadn’t been able to make a single coherent sentence. Marinette bit her lip as she looked down at the box in her hands.

Food is a great conversation starter, is what Alya had told her.

“A-Adrien wait!” Marinette yelled, once again louder than she had intended.

Adrien stopped and looked at her with wide eyes. He turned back to face her again, tilting his head in confusion.

“Is everything okay?” he asked gently.

Why did he have to be so nice? His polite concern and kind voice were not helping her calm down at all.

Marinette gulped as she instead focused on the box in her hands, “I-I was...with Alya. Studying. And had some...um…”

He waited patiently for her to get her words out, staying quiet for her while she tried to untwist her tongue.

“Do you..want...um…do you study?”

Yes! She asked him! Wait, hold on. What did she just ask?

“Do I study?” Adrien repeated carefully, pausing a second as his phone chimed somewhere in his pocket before continuing, “Well, yeah. Whenever I have time to that is.”

Marinette was internally screaming. If she ever needed a black hole to open up and swallow her immediately it was right now this second. The very simple plan to strike up a conversation with Adrien by herself was going down in flames. A complete tragedy. There would only be a singular fatality and it was her dignity.

Adrien’s phone gave another insistent chime. He lowered his gaze a moment, making a face as though he was considering just ignoring it.

“Um...your phone…” Marinette whispered when it went off again.

Adrien frowned as he muttered an apology.

Marinette waited quietly while he lifted up his phone. He didn’t even bother to unlock it, only pressing to light up the screen to check what the notification was. Adrien’s brow furrowed as he let out another clouded sigh. Her heart skipped in her chest when he lifted his gaze towards her, his vibrant green eyes looking at her softly as he drew his lips into a thoughtful line.

“Marinette-” he started but was quickly cut off by the sound of a phone going off again.

Marinette’s heart had been soaring in the clouds until that point. But at the series of beeps her own phone started emitting, her heart fell straight back down to earth and went splat at her feet. She recognised the specific noise her phone was making and as she checked it, the flashing purple banner over the screen only confirmed it. It was a public Akuma alert. Of course things had to get worse.

#my work #love square #adrinette #lovesquare #miraculous ladybug #miraculous fanfic #miraculous fanfiction

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crystalgirl259 · 3 years

Text

How to Train Your Dragonblood 3: The Dragonblood Alpha Ch6

Ed and Cliff shivered badly as they flew on Karloff's back over a half-frozen ocean in the middle of a snowstorm. The sun was almost completely set by now, casting the sky in a beautiful light and dark purple with a faded yellow. High above them were dozens of stars starting to appear through the clouds. On any other day, Cliff, Ed, and Karloff would have found it beautiful. But they were too focused and worried about Kai and Jay to think about it.

"He's just like his mother! She could never stay put either!" Cliff suddenly shouted in frustration at his son's stubbornness. When he first met her, Libber may have come off as a little awkward, but once he got to know her, she was strong and uncompromising and was always willing to stand up for those who were helpless. Jay was almost a perfect copy of his mother and most of the time Cliff loved it, but not today.

"He's just twenty, and a Viking; I mean there couldn't be the worst combination." "When I think of how stubborn and senseless you were back in the day..." He trailed off as his expression switched to a hopeless one. "Huh, now not much has changed actually.

"Ah, you know how he's like; he won't give up, and if Jay finds Iron Baron before we find him..." Cliff gulped in fear at the thought. He had already lost some of his closest friends thanks to that monster, he wouldn't let him take his son.

"Nothing can happen to your boy as long as Kai is with him; he's a Fire Dragonblood for crying out loud!" Ed tried to reassure his friend, but it did little to help the old chief. While he agreed that Kai was powerful and cared about Jay, he was more stubborn and careless than his son. Cliff was about to voice his concerns when he noticed something in the corner of his eyes. Below them, a crack in the ice was seen. Cliff noticed it and made Karloff fly back.

As they approached the hole in, Ed leaned on the side and grabbed the floating helmet out of the water.

Sitting back up, he handed it to Cliff who carefully looked at it. He looked back and Ed caught his concerned gaze. Cliff looked down at his dragonblood in determination and offered him the helmet to sniff.

"Find them, Karloff!" He ordered. Karloff took a sniff, memorizing the scent. The Metal Dragonblood growled and started beating his wings faster as they ascended, the storm still raging around them...

****************

It took a few minutes until Jay finally got back to reality. A reality that was getting crazier by the minute. First, he breaks tradition by saving and falling in love with one of the most dangerous species of Dragonbloods, then he loses his leg, and now his mother is back from the dead and living with dragonbloods. Why did things like that happen only to him? Right now, Libber was leading Jay and Kai through a maze of rock caves. While Jay struggled to keep up, Kai was easily able to navigate through the inner ice caves from his past experiences living in the nest for years.

"Ho-hold on! Wait just a minute!" Jay shouted as he chased after his mother through the caves, but he was steadily ignored. Libber swiftly jumped on the rocks ahead of him, motioning for him to follow.

"You can't just say something like that and run off!" He exclaimed angrily as he climbed on the rocks after her, noticeably slower and less gracefully while Kai came after him. "You're my MOTHER?! I mean what the– Do you- do you grasp how insane it sounds?!"

"She does kinda look like you," Kai called from the back.

"NOT HELPING KAI!" Jay screeched at him as they reached a steep slope that Libber climbed in seconds.

"Come quickly." She pressured the couple.

"I have questions! Where have you been all this time?!" He demanded as he attempted to climbs after her but slipped so Kai grabbed his waist and easily pushed him from behind. Jay felt his face heat up and this earned a round of chuckles from the brunette. It really wasn't easy to go through such terrain with a prosthetic leg. He had seen some of the people from Ninjago struggle and he had years of experience. Jay tumbled forward and got back on his feet right after to keep going.

"What've you been doing?! They said you were dead! Everybody thinks you were eaten by a..." He trailed off as they got out in an open, sunlit cavern where hundreds of different dragonbloods were flying around frozen structures covered in greenery. The sight brought gasped of wonder from both Jay and Kai. Kai was stunned to see such a peaceful nest. For most of their lives, he and Nya had been forced to join under that monster's rule and others were born there.

He would have never thought there was such an amazing place that was practically right next door to Ninjago.

As they step out, Jay and Kai glance at a group of baby Dragonbloods playing nearby. They both stepped back when a huge dragonblood flew right over them. Jay smiled at the multitude of dragonbloods flying freely in the open space. He got closer to the rim wherefrom above there was a creek running down the edge.

"Uh, Jaybird." Kai suddenly said and pointed up above them. Jay looked up and gasped when he saw the same Lightning Dragonblood hanging from the ceiling, his mother also holding it. The sapphire-colored dragonblood crooned as it tilted its head to look at them. Jay stared at the pair in shock. He honestly thought that he was the first dragonblood rider, yet here was his mother being so close to one. While a part of him was overjoyed that his mother was alive and well, a part of him was angry at her for being gone all these years.

He wanted to yell at her and tell her what it was like growing up with just a judgemental father and a disappointed village.

To make her feel as bad he felt his entire life. People might say he was being petty, but he didn't feel like that. But if she and the Lightning Dragonblood had a bond similar to the one he shared with Kai then there might be a chance for them to build bridges. His heart was still conflicted about this. Even though this place looked good he couldn't see what was so great about it to keep her away from her home, husband, and child.

"This is where you've been for 20 years?" Jay asked, not sure what else to say at the moment. Libber smiled and nodded as she observed him carefully, her face alight with happiness, hope, and a twinge of fear. Behind him, Kai sat down on a nearby boulder, seeing that this was a moment between Jay and Libber, not him. As he watched his boyfriend agonize on what to do, he was approached by a young Shadow Dragonblood. He chose to ignore the noirette and focused on Jay

"You... You've been rescuing them." Jay realized when he remembered what Clutch said about their fort being attacked. Libber looked around and nodded again. Jay was in complete disbelief as behind him the Shadow Dragonblood started nuzzling Kai in welcome. This caught the brunette off-guard for a second. After living with humans for five years, many of his friends and himself had had to force down their animal instincts. They didn't want to frighten the humans any more than they had.

Kai understood that the noirette didn't mean any harm, but he was worried that Jay might get the wrong idea and didn't want to upset the ginger-haired man any more than he was.

"You're not upset?" She asked a little nervously. Jay sort of was, but he didn't know how to tell her. His mother had been living among a dragonblood paradise while he had to put up with his father's disappointment and the villagers' mistrust.

"What? No, I-I don't know..." He stammered as Kai stepped away from the Shadow Dragonblood who watched him crestfallen. "It's a bit much to get my head around, to be frank; it's not every day you find out your mother is some kind of crazy, feral, vigilante, dragon lady." He chuckled awkwardly and Libber smiled sadly. Indeed, her ideas weren't welcomed. She could tell her son was heartbroken to hear how much happier she was among the beasts.

In the same way, Jay was more at ease on the back of his boyfriend.

With a quick look, the Lightning Dragonblood offered Libber a claw that she hooked her staff around and was lowered down, sliding on a wing. As soon as her feet touched the ground, the Lightning Dragonblood transformed into their human form. They were revealed to be a woman who was around the same age as Libber. She had long auburn hair kept in three separate braids behind her back and pale skin. She has a slim figure, but Jay could clearly make out some strong muscles.

She wore a midnight blue, long sleeve tunic, an orange belt, and black leggings that appear layered.

She had armbands and boots with spikes on the sides. She also had a few layers of cloth wrapped around her waist, with her left leg exposed.

"At least I'm not boring, right?" Libber replied as Jay looked around as an Ice Dragonblood in its dragon form bumped his shoulder and other young dragonbloods started coming over to look at them. They hadn't seen a Fire Dragonblood in years and the only human who was nice to them was Libber. He was hesitant to touch it but gave in when it continued.

"Well, I suppose there is that... one specific thing..." Jay muttered, not wanting to meet her eyes.

"Do you... Do you like it?" She asked as she approached him unsurely.

"I-I-I don't have the words..." He admitted, looking cautious and a bit hurt while Libber was acting like a fearful, untrusting dragonblood. But they didn't expect things to be fixed with a snap of the fingers. This was a very delicate matter. Unfortunately, Ninjago people didn't do delicate. Meanwhile, Kai was surrounded by curious dragonbloods. One dragonblood sniffed him down the clothes and then lifted him up with their bare hands. Kai was stunned as he found himself supported only by a stranger's hands.

"HEY! HANDS OFF THE MERCHANDISE YOU GODDAMN CREEPS!" He roared and they quickly backed off. Libber finally noticed the brunette and immediately got closer to him, hunching down.

"Can-Can I?" She whispered to her son, already seeing his bond with Kai. She had only caught a glimpse of a Fire Dragonblood when one attacked Ninjago all those years ago. She had been living here for about two decades and she had never seen a living, breathing Fire Dragonblood. Libber had feared that they were extinct. At Jay's approval, she crouched and dropped her staff.

"Oh, he's beautiful." She cooed as she lifted a hand for him to sniff then traced her hand through his spikey brown hair.

"Of course I am." Kai laughed along with her and nuzzled her cheek. Jay was little put off by Kai's actions, but he knew the brunette long enough to know he only loved Jay and he was prone to these animal interactions, whether he was in his human or dragon form, even though he mostly only did it in private with Jay and other dragonbloods. Jay was surprised to see his mother right in her element. She was still so beautiful as the pictures Cliff had shown him, and every one of her moves was graceful and fluid.

It spoke of years of trust and attention dedicated to the dragonbloods she had been living with.

It truly wasn't a big surprise to see her get along with Kai, an outside dragonblood, so easily. Kai watched them get along and smiled warmly, happy to see his mother and boyfriend becoming friends. Without realizing it, Libber stood on her knees and kept the brunette's head in her hands.

"Um... I'm sorry, but what's your name?" She asked and Kai chuckled.

"My name's Kai, and I've been dating Jay for almost five years now, he's a great guy." He replied with a smirk as he caught Jay blushing, only to freeze when he caught Libber's wide eyes.

"You're both dating?" She gasped as her eyes kept darting back and forth between the brunette and her son. Jay cast Kai an angry look, which made his fiery boyfriend wince, before looking back to her mother.

"Yeah... as Kai said, it's been going on for a few years now and we couldn't be happier."

"Yep, we've been talking about a summer beach wedding and a little cottage by the lakes for the grandkids." Kai laughed and was soon joined by Libber while Jay spluttered and stumbled to find any words as his face turned scarlet.

"T-That's not what's happening! I-I-I mean, we've talked a-about it but there's n-nothing set in stone, a-and things are t-tough right now and-"

"Jaybird, relax, I'm just messing with you." Kai sent through the link and Jay relaxed almost immediately. Libber quickly noticed the change in mood and it didn't take her long to figure out what was happening.

"YOU TWO SHARE A LINK!?" She screeched as if she had just been told everything she touched turned to diamonds and gold.

"You know what the link is?" Jay asked, but he wasn't that surprised. If she had been living with Dragonbloods for twenty years then she must know all their secrets and probably shared a link with one or more.

"Of course, many dragonbloods only share a link with people they trust and love the most; it's typically only shared with family members such as parents, siblings, mates, or children."

"Do you share a link with anyone around here?" Kai asked, eyeing a few locals still hanging around.

"Um, no, I don't; I've been living here for twenty years and I haven't shared a link like that with anyone, not even Wisp." She admitted, looking a little disappointed, gesturing to the Lightning Dragonblood she was riding earlier. "I'm so pleased and happy for you both that you can have something as special as that." She smiled as she wrapped her arms around her son and his boyfriend, which the couple happily returned.

"Thanks, Mom," Jay muttered.

"Um, Kai, if it's not too much bother can I please see your dragon form?" She asked, feeling very awkward asking. Kai chuckled lightly before he suddenly vanished a flash of red light and a dragon stood in his place. Libber didn't hesitate to look the red beast over, running her fingers over every scar and scale as her eyes burned every detail into her memory.

"He might very well be the last of his kind." She said without thinking.

"Thanks for the reminded." Kai thought as he trilled dejected. Jay glanced at his boyfriend and felt sorry for him. He wanted to comfort him but he wasn't sure if he was allowed to approach the Fire Dragonblood's side while his mother was inspecting him. He settled for sending the brunette as much love and comfort through their link, which Kai was thankful for. Kai then walked around her and butted his head underneath her arm for more attention.

He rolled on his back in her lap as she scratched him as inspected his neck, causing him to purr.

"Look, he's your age! No wonder you get along so well!" She gasped in delight and Jay smiled. Kai was in much better spirits. Libber was very nice and entertaining. It was quite obvious she would be since she was the mother of his boyfriend. They stood in front of each other again, Libber tipped her head up and down like Kai and mimicking his yelps of happiness. "How did you manage to meet such a magnificent creature?" She asked her son, not taking her eyes off Kai.

Libber's enthusiasm was infectious and Jay, Kai, and the nearby dragonbloods found themselves smiling and cheering.

When the couple registered her question, their smiles dropped and almost all the dragonbloods sensed it and took off faster than a Speed Dragonblood could blink.

"I found him in the woods; he was shot down and...wounded." He gulped, a little worried about how his mother would take the news about how he was the one who basically crippled Kai. When he said that, Libber frowned as she stood while Jay sheepishly fidgeted on the spot and Kai looked anywhere but her or Jay. She walked to a Water Dragonblood who was in their dragon form, missing their right back leg, and ran her hand down its jaw.

"Vapore lost her leg to one of Iron Baron's traps." She said as bent down to grab her staff and walked over to a Mind Dragonblood. "Interis got his wing sliced by razor netting, and this... oh, poor Theuros was blinded by a tree snare, and then left to die alone and scared." She whimpered as she carefully took hold of a Poison Dragonblood's hand and he leaned into her touch. Jay nodded along with her as he took a good look at some of the other dragonbloods perched around them.

Some were missing patches of scales, hard to see with their dark coloring, and others had tattered wings, no doubt from flying non-stop and whatever wound they gained from the traps.

He and Kai both stiffened, however, when she pointed to Kai's prosthetic fin.

"And what of this? Did Iron Baron or his filthy trappers do this atrocity too?" She snarled as her voice turned cold and hard as she gripped the leather and examined it and the couple instantly paled.

"Ooohh... hehe, yeah... Huh, well crazy thing is..." He gulped as he swung his arms awkwardly and walked closer to his boyfriend. "I'm actually the one who shot him down." He reluctantly confessed, only to receive a confused and angry look from his mother. "It's-It's okay though, he got me back, right baby?" Jay giggled as Kai shook his head happily in Jay's arms as he kept running his hands over his scales. "You couldn't save all of me, could you? You just had to make it even! So, peg leg!" He exclaimed and he threw an arm around Kai's neck and lifted his foot.

Libber was at a loss.

It really was the most obvious proof of the Gods' sense of humor. Her son condemned a dragonblood and in turn said dragonblood also crippled him for life. Now they love and depended on each other. Kai to fly and Jay to escape life. Kai suddenly shook him off and dove down between Jay's legs, throwing the human on his back as he laughed nervously. Libber, just as uncomfortable, got on her knees to touch Kai's snout again.

"What did your father think of your boyfriend?" She finally asked the second most awkward question for the couple.

"Uh... he-he didn't take it all that well... but then, he changed; they all did." He smiled as a crease of disapproval crossed Libber's face as she listened. "Pretty soon, dragonbloods from the nest came to live in Ninjago with everyone." Jay giggled lightly, still a little stunned at that fact, but his smile dropped when she shook her head.

"If only it were all possible." She scoffed and Jay's blood turned cold at his mother's certain doubt.

"No, really-"

"Believe me! I tried as well but people are not capable of change, Jay; some of us are just born different." She sighed as she sat up and looked at him and then at Wisp as Kai returned to his human form. Wisp suddenly took off to the sky to join the other dragonbloods. Libber sighed sadly as she remembered her last night in Ninjago. The sky was red and filled with smoke as a large Earth Dragonblood flew overhead. As it swept up, she remembered seeing a burning hall, the light illuminating the sky and revealing even more dragonbloods flying around.

Screams were heard and a giant torch was lifted.

"Ninjago was a land of kill or be killed, but I believed peace was possible." She told her son as she remembered the Earth Dragonblood falling down right in front of a charging soldier. As the man lifted his ax to kill it, he was stopped by Libber grabbing his arm. She believed that fighting would only make it worse. But it was a very unpopular opinion. That night was one of the worst raids the village had ever suffered and not only that but the Chief and his family very nearly died.

The Earth Dragonblood quickly go back up and flew away and the man looked at her with contempt.

As he ran off after the dragonblood, Libber looked at her house and saw a dragon getting in through the broken roof.

"Then, one night, a dragonblood broke into our house finding you in the cradle." She sighed as she visualized Wisp walking into the house towards a baby's cradle. As soon as Libber entered the room she reached for a sword near the door. She stopped, however, holding the blade up, when she saw the dragonblood playing with Jay with her giant claw. As she looked at the laughing baby and the dragonblood she lowered the weapon in amazement.

Kai cooed, thinking of his boyfriend as a cute, little baby.

Jay didn't know if he wanted to glare at him or bury himself in embarrassment as his face turned scarlet again.

"I rushed to protect you, but what I saw was proof of everything I believed." She smiled at the memory. When Wisp noticed her, the dragonblood accidentally scratched Jay's chin, making him cry as she turned around on the human, growling under her breath. Libber quickly took a few steps back, holding the sword up. But as she looked in Wisp's eyes, she let it go. This wasn't a vicious beast, but an intelligent, gentle creature whose soul reflected her own.

They looked in each other's eyes and a bond was born.

But then, an ax flew between them. The dragonblood retreated, howling as Cliff appeared, dodging its lightning, as he told his wife to run. Libber grabbed Wisp's wing but she shook her off and turned back to face her. Seeing her cornered, Cliff made his way through the flames to his son. She remembered his husband shouting at her to hold on like she was in danger. Once Jay was safe in his arms, the Chief looked back at his wife to see her being carried away by the dragonblood.

He watched through the hole in the roof as the dragonbloods flew further and further away from him and his crying son.

"You and your father nearly died that night, all because I couldn't kill a dragonblood." She mumbled, unable to look at her son or Kai.

"Runs in the family." Jay smiled faintly, starting to piece things together, as Kai pulled him into a one-armed hug for comfort. There were still things left unclear, but he shouldn't jump to conclusions.

"It broke my heart to stay away, but I believed it would be safer if I did." She finished and a blind man could all the years of pain and sorrow in her face and eyes.

"How did you survive?" He asked, fearing that Wisp had taken her to the nest then they both managed to escape that monster, but Libber suddenly burst out laughing.

"Oh, Wisp never meant to harm me; she must've thought I belonged here, in the home of the great Dragonblood of Creation." She beamed as they started walking closer to the edge. Down below, in a pool of water, was a huge, white, and gold creature with giant whiskers that looked like a beard and hundreds of long shining spikes jutting out from the back of his head and all over his back. Dragonbloods were flying around him and bowed down to him when they got close.

Kai's eyes widened when he saw the ancient dragonblood below them.

Creation was one of, if not the most powerful elements in the world; rivaled only by the element of Destruction and the mythical First Born. Many secrets remained about the true extent of this dragonblood's powers and abilities. Many believed it was just a myth. This white and gold dragon possessed the elements of Fire, Earth, Ice, and Lightning and could affect the physical world in ways that Elemental Dragonbloods couldn't.

"This is the Alpha species, one of the few that still exists; every Nest has its Queen but this is the King of all dragonsbloods," Libber smirked when she saw Jay and Kai's stunned faces at the sight of this giant, stunning creature. "With his icy breath, this graceful giant built a safe haven for dragonbloods everywhere." She smiled as she pointed with her staff at the ice-covered roof of the cave while they walked down.

"Wait, that's the ice-spitter? He's responsible for all that destruction?!" Jay gasped as he looked at the ice-covered roof.

"He protects us! We all live under his care and his command." She snapped, thinking he was being rude. Behind them, a group of hatchlings appeared out of the foliage and converged on a frightened and annoyed Kai. The Fire Dragonblood was only saved by Wisp scaring them off.

"All but the babies of course, who listen to no one." Libber laughed loudly as the babies flew around and hung on the King's face, unbothered whatsoever. The white and golden dragonblood rose and spun to look at them. On the hill they were on, Libber and Wisp bowed down as Jay looked at the giant's head. Even Kai felt intimidated as he crouched lower to the ground. The Alpha stood right in front of Jay, before transforming into his human form.

The Alpha was an elderly man with a long white beard.

He was wearing white robes and a conical straw hat with a tattered cape. He seemed to pull a long staff out of nowhere and walked over to them. Jay stood frozen as his mother, Wisp, and Kai was on their knees in a sign of respect. The ginger-haired man had never once seen Kai bow down to anyone, not even at the nest. This did little to ease Jay's worry as the old man came closer, examining Libber's son. His face showed no emotion as he scanned the young man up and down.

Jay gulped, getting ready to either run, beg, or just stay still as a statue.

All of a sudden, the old dragonblood transformed again and puffed a breath out that covered the two humans and two dragonbloods. Jay, being closer, ended up with his hair covered in frost before returning to his spot in the creek.

"Master Wu likes ya." His mother laughed merrily.

"Master Wu?" Kai asked as they get back to their feet, feeling like they could relax again.

"Yeah, that's his name." She replied as Jay shook his head from the frost and gasped at the impressive creature. "You must be hungry." She smiled at the couple.

"Ah, yeah, I could eat." Jay nodded.

"Same." Kai grinned as he and Jay held each other's hand.

"Good! It's feeding time." She said as she gently took her son's arm and guided them further into the sanctuary...

#how to train your dragonblood #ninjago jay #ninjago kai #ninjago jay's mother #ninjago cliff gordon #plasmashipping

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rwbyremnants · 3 years

Link

WARNING: Still a little gore

Okay I did mean to post this faster than this but at least it wasn't TOO long... I hope... anyway enjoy!

=Chapter 28

The world seemed to slow to a crawl as Weiss reached toward the red stain blossoming outward from where the blade was penetrating her navy blue dress, turning it a shade of indigo. She vaguely saw Pyrrha taking a step away from her, eyes wide in abject horror.

Cinder. No, wait - one of the Huntsmen. Raven. Her father. The culprit could have been anyone by this point. As Weiss tried to turn on the spot to see what was going on, she lamented how many people had come to resent her in such a short time. It wasn’t as if she had ever done anything to anyone on purpose, and yet she had become one of the most hated people in Vale. How unfair that was! Now all that remained was to find out which specific adversary had taken action.

Nothing could have prepared her for the incensed expression in Emerald Sustrai’s face as she stood panting in her driveway, shaking all over. Yes, she was angry, furious, fists clenched just below her still-bandaged forearms… but something wasn't right. Her eyes were unfocused, breathing ragged and uneven. Saliva was running down her chin.

“Make you pay,” she stammered, stumbling slightly as she backed away with the knife, fought to remain standing. Clearly, it wasn't easy. “Get you to… make Cinder… make her.”

“I…” Pressing a hand against the wound, she asked, “Why?”

“You!” Tears had joined the spittle, and she raised the knife again. “You got her h-hurt! Not allowed! Fake Dragon, I'll-”

That was as far as she got. Grinding back into life, Pyrrha tackled her to the ground, wresting the knife away from her. Not that Emerald was going down easy, but it was difficult to tell through all that fog; Weiss felt her own vision beginning to blur as she sank to her knees.

“HELP!” her friend was screaming as she wrestled with the green-haired Dragon, even though she sounded so far away. “Someone help us! Please!”

Not that Weiss could wait for help. The world was sliding to one side - or was she? Impossible for her to tell. Her entire body felt so light… maybe it wouldn't matter what fell where. Maybe nothing mattered.

Nothing except…

“Yang…”

Even her own voice sounded false, immaterial. Footfalls and outcries filled her ears, but light was already fading by then. No time for anything anymore. Only nothing.

-------------------------------------

Though Weiss had a fleeting memory of sirens, shouting and being manhandled, it all seemed so insubstantial that she couldn't be bothered to focus. At some point, she was sure she heard her mother's voice…

The next thing she was aware of was glaring fluorescent lights overhead. They hurt. Nothing else did, but that was so painful that she couldn't stand it. So she squeezed her eyes shut again immediately. The throbbing had to stop, she wanted to throw up, but she couldn't move, her legs were so heavy, and some unseen force was jostling her all over the place…

Consciousness evaded her for so long that when it came back again, she had no idea whether or not it was hours or days later. The lights were still painful but tolerable now. Trying to move felt like rolling back the tide, but she had to - something she couldn't quite catch hold of in her mind was screaming that she had to act, to move right now. So she pushed up with her elbows-

And felt a wealth of bandages and cotton pads restricting her movement. Not that they did anything to blot out the pain: sitting up that one time made a cold prickle spread outward from a sharp heat, and she hissed in through her teeth.

At least now she could see that she was in the hospital room. Sickly green curtains hung around her bed, and the quiet beep of a heart rate monitor broke the silence every few seconds. Looking down at the sheets, she caught sight of a little red tube leading from the crook of her arm up to a bag of blood hanging from a metal apparatus.

That was when it all came rushing back to her: Emerald. The knife. Pyrrha-

“He-” The noise that came from her throat was more of a rasp than a word, and it set in motion a coughing fit that made the pain in her abdomen so much worse. In that moment, she wished she had never woken up.

A stirring in the corner of her eye made her turn, dreading another attack - not that she had even seen the last one coming. Instead, she saw her mother, slumped down in a chair and quietly dozing. She looked utterly exhausted. Bags darkened the skin under her eyes, and her dress was more wrinkled than she could remember seeing her wear in quite some time - even on her most drunken nights, she would simply change the next morning.

“Mom?” she rasped. No response. Looking down, she saw an empty cup of coffee by her pumps. How long had she been up before she succumbed? Maybe it would be kinder to let her sleep, even though she desperately wanted some answers.

Settling back against the bed again, Weiss resigned herself to her fate. Aches were beginning to make themselves known. Mostly, the one in her abdomen was the one worth noting, but dozens of lesser pains were beginning to flare up now that her mind was awake. Did she get run over by a bus? Curious now, she peeled back the bed sheet to get a look at her abdomen…

A red blotch was marring the pristine white of the bandages around her midsection. Weiss let out a strangled cry of alarm. Seconds later, she more felt than saw her mother shoot to her feet before her face came into view over her bed.

“Oh no… oh no oh no oh n- NURSE! My daughter!”

Medical staff began to flood into the room. She looked on in mingling a horror and fascination as they began to strip away the bandage, examining the tiny hole from which welled her life's blood. She tried to keep watching, hoping to learn something about what they were doing and what was happening to her, but the sight of her own blood made her head so light that she had to lay it back down…

-------------------------------------

The next time Weiss awoke, clarity came a lot faster. Even still lying in the bed, she remembered that she had been attacked, that she was presumably in the hospital now. Remembered the look on her mother's face when she saw her bleeding again. How many times had she seen her bleeding before? The thought of forcing her mother to suffer through the agony of watching her own child cling to life on a thread was an awful prospect.

This time, she didn't try to sit up. Partly because she was so weak she didn't feel like she could accomplish it, but also because the longer she lay there, the more certain she was that sitting up had been what opened her wound again. Not that she was any sort of a medical professional.

With no way of tracking the passage of time, she couldn't know how long she had been awake before a familiar face poked over her bed. After a second, the olive-toned features lit up with mingling relief and joy.

“There she is,” Kali Belladonna whispered.

“M-Mrs-” She gagged, but somehow stopped herself from coughing this time.

“Shhhh.” Looking around very briefly, she reached toward an unseen table and came back with a small cup of water, gently tipping it to her lips. Weiss drank deeply until her thirst was slaked. “There… that's better, isn't it?”

Gasping for breath now that she had finished, Weiss gazed up at the cook. She certainly looked as if she could use a few more hours of sleep herself. Unlike her own mother, Blake's mother was as well-dressed as ever, makeup in place and hair flawless. But that couldn't hide the very real fear in her hazel eyes, nor the fatigue in her posture.

“I'm… what…”

“Take it easy. Do you want to know what happened?” Weiss nodded. “What's the last thing you remember?”

“Stabbed. Emerald. Then… I woke up, Mommy was here, but… I bled.”

The instant she tried to sit up, Kali pushed her back down firmly. A thrill of dread shot through her - even though she trusted Kali, it was scary being held down.

“Lie still. You lost a lot of blood, twice. You shouldn't lose any more.” Tears glistened in the corners of her eyes.

“I'm sorry.” Her own were welling up now. “I'm sorry, Kali, I…”

“Shhhh, Weiss, it's not your fault.” Clearing her throat, she began, “Emerald attacked you. Her story is… interesting, to say the least. From there, your mother heard your friend Pyrrha calling for help and called for the ambulance. We… well, I kept pressure on the wound until they got to you, Pyrrha kept Emerald under control. She got nicked here and th-”

“What? No, I have to-”

“Stop, stop,” she reminded her as she held her in place. “It wasn't too bad; they already treated her. Small cuts on her arms, nothing to worry about. Please don't forget about your stitches.”

Feeling chagrined, she whispered, “I'm sorry… so… what happened? I'm alive, am I going to be okay?”

“They…” Her throat worked to swallow. “Well, as I said, you lost a lot of blood, and… the blade did nick your kidney, but missed the major blood vessels, so you were lucky there. Still, it was touch and go for the first couple of days to save the kidney.”

“Days?” Afraid of the answer, she asked, “How long…?”

Kali averted her eyes. “It's Sunday. So almost the entire week. But you're stable now, you just- they warned us that if you pulled your stitches again, they would have a harder time… keeping you from bleeding out. So please, please…”

The tears made her reach up to pet up and down Kali's neck. The warmth was comforting to them both. “Gee whiz… I'm so sorry for making you worry. You and- is my mother still here? What about Pyrrha? Has anyone told Yang? We have to-”

“Shhhh, Weiss. Yang knows. She's right outside.”

“Can I see her?” When Kali frowned, she craned her neck up. “I need- need to see her!”

“She's been awake for so long, Weiss… she needs her sleep. All of us do. It's not your fault,” she headed her off before she could apologise again. “But we love you and are so worried, and we want to make sure at least one of us is awake if there's news.”

A little smile broke through Weiss's fear and gloom. “You love me?”

Kali blinked a few times, stunned out of her current train of thought. “What? Oh… oh, Weiss, of course! Haven't you been able to tell?”

The poor girl burst into tears. The entire situation was far too much for her, and hearing that someone she had become increasingly attached to felt the same way provided an easily accessible outlet for all those feelings to come pouring out. Kali leaned down to hug her very delicately, to make sure Weiss didn't lean up. They cried together, laughed in the middle before crying took over again.

“Oh, sweetheart,” Kali finally breathed when she could talk again, kissing the side of her head. “I'm so glad you're going to be alright. I r-really… Weiss, you are family now, and don't you ever forget it!”

Such simple words, yet they were music to her ears.

After another few emotional minutes, Kali bowed out and prompted her mother to come in and fuss over her for a while. She had never felt so adored in all her life - well, other than with Yang.

“The doctors really have been swell,” Willow finally blubbered some time later. Her poor mother seemed like she was nearly as bad off as she had been when drinking, but wasn't drunk; that was some relief to the patient. “Even let Kali and Yang stay, as long as I was here to vouch… that they knew my b-baby…”

Her smile was almost pitying as she squeezed her mother's hand. “I'm going to be fine, Mother. I promise. Though I guess I won't be cheerleading much for the rest of the semester…”

“This is very h-hard for m- for me to… I want to hate those Dragons! My baby keeps getting h-hurt, but then… Kali is so wonderful to me, and you, so it isn’t- and your father! He isn't one of them, and he attacked us, so even with that girl stabbing you…”

“Yes, Mommy, I know,” she told her gently. As she well knew, calling her that came out when she was very emotional, but it also seemed to convey a deeper love that her mother often worried was lost. Her hope was that it might help soothe her nerves somewhat.

“I don't know what I would have done. You're my… m-my only baby left! Winter's gone, your father… and Whitley-”

“Whitley and Winter are fine! They're just… not as close. Right now!” she added when she saw her face scrunching up more. “But… I mean, give them time! Especially for Whitley. You know he's Daddy's little boy.”

Nodding, she leaned down and left one of those kisses on Weiss's forehead that was more firm than necessary, causing her to roll her eyes even while she smiled. “My little angel. I'm so glad she didn't get you. You'll never… never know!”

Comforting her enough so that they could hold a conversation again took the better part of five minutes. She knew it was a little twisted, but Weiss was extremely happy. Yes, she hated that she and her mother had to go through so much trauma to get to that point, but at least it felt like they were mother and daughter again. It was a vast improvement over the wino she had living in her house scant weeks ago.

“Okay,” she finally whispered into her hair as she pet up and down her mother's back. “I do need to know something.”

“Yes? Oh sweetie, whatever it is, we will find out together. I promise!”

Smiling a little wider, she asked, “Do you know… what happened to Emerald? Do the police have her?”

“Oh…” Finally, Willow sat back up, one of her hands brushing her own hair back into place as the other one remained on Weiss's shoulder. “Well… yes, but she's in the asylum ward here at the hospital. Under constant guard. At least, that's what Kali told me.”

“Have they tested her for drugs?”

Her mother looked quite taken aback. “How… did you know that?” When Weiss merely waited, she cleared her throat before continuing, “They said she has been doing… oh, I don't know much about these things. Opium, maybe?”

That confirmed something that has been bothering Weiss since she first saw Emerald in her front garden. Her unfocused eyes, broken sentences… they may have meant nothing, or may have just been the product of grief. But she had never seen anyone behave quite that way before. Her first thought had been the reefer, but opium could certainly be the problem - not that she knew much more than her mother did.

“Weiss? What is it, sweetheart?”

“Nothing. Just… never mind. The important thing is that I survived, and I don't plan on going anywhere ever again. Mother, I'm sorry for worrying you so much! I never meant-”

Her mother's hand drifted up and pressed into her lips gently, silencing her whinging. “Please, don't apologize for that anymore. How were you to know that she would… th-that sh-sh-she…”

Again, her mother was useless for conversation for the next several minutes. They then talked a bit about her general health after she had collected herself, and about whether or not Whitley had come to see her - he had, but had scarcely stayed for a few minutes before wanting to return to the waiting room.

Then they were interrupted. Yang stood in the doorway, looking completely beside herself. Weiss had never seen her hair so matted, nor her features so stricken.

“Oh,” Willow breathed when she noticed, sitting back away from her daughter.

“Yang?”

That was all the prompting it took for her brute to take off running across the room, straight for her. Willow had to stand up and catch her to keep her from landing on the bed with her full weight.

“Don't! Her stitches-”

“WEISS!” Tears were streaming down her face that quickly, bloodshot eyes wide and pleading. “I'm sorry! I shoulda been there, shoulda- you almost died and- a-and I never… told you I…”

Finally, her mother let her go so she could embrace her love. They both breathed a sigh of relief when the hug was a lot gentler than the one Yang had initially gone in for. A minute ticked by as they found comfort in the warmth of each other’s bodies, in the nearness of their soulmate.

“Shhh,” Weiss whispered gently into her hair, her own eyes wet. “It’s okay. It’s okay! You can’t be everywh-”

“NO! I should be! You’re all I care about in the whole goddamn world, Weiss! And if I lose you… I’ll burn it to the fucking ground!”

Both she and her mother started at the strong language used. A second later, she petted over her hair and hissed, “Hey, hey. I’m fine, alright? Yang, I’m fine. Golly…”

After a couple of minutes, Yang finally pulled back to smile down at her. “My Princess. She’s a real fighter.”

“Sure I am,” Weiss laughed wetly, pushing their foreheads together. They both giggled to release the fear and tension and pure raw emotion. “Pyrrha deserves the congratulations.”

“Oh, believe me, she’s gonna get a big ol’ kiss from me the next time I see her! But… wow, this just- I can’t believe… was it really Emerald? If you say it was, then I trust you, but it’s still crazy to think-”

“It was.” Sighing, she looked away at the curtain. “But I could tell she wasn’t herself. Too much drugs, apparently. Has… Emerald ever…?”

Yang blinked at her for a moment, then seemed to realise what she was asking all at once. “Oh! No, never - I mean, we’ve all tried reefer once or twice, but Emerald barely even drinks that often. Nothing stronger than that.”

“Okay.”

“Why? What did they say she was on?”

Weiss glanced at her mother, who had been watching them very carefully. Almost as if studying them. When she realized they were looking at her, she held up both hands helplessly. “I don’t know. Opium, maybe? I thought she got it from you.”

Even while Weiss was groaning at her mother’s continuing unintended prejudice, Yang sighed and answered patiently, “Not from me. And not from any of us; the Dragons don’t deal in stuff like that.”

“Well…” Sighing deeply, the patient reached up to caress Yang’s cheek. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed her mother wincing, but decided the best way to handle that would be to ignore it; let her sort out her feelings in her own time. “I suppose there’s only one way to find out.”

-------------------------------------

“What do you mean, ‘you can’t see her’?!”

The full-bearded officer tipped his hat again, even as he repeated the same sentiment: “Sorry, can’t let you in there. Dangerous criminal.”

“I know!” Weiss burst out, leaning even more heavily against Kali. “I’ve been waiting days for them to tell me I can leave my bed so I can actually talk to the ‘criminal’ myself! Now, will you move out of the way?”

“Listen, girlie. Why don't ya go back to your room? Let the adults handle business.”

Kali definitely took offense to that. “And what am I, then? A newborn?” All she got in return for that was a wolf whistle, and her eyes narrowed further. “Just ask if she's open to any visitors. I assume you have her handcuffed to the bed?”

“Well… yeah, but that don't-”

“Ask.”

He asked. It didn't take him very long to come back and usher them into the hospital room, though he looked quite surly about it.

Emerald was definitely not in the best of shape, but she was doing better than Weiss had been when she was admitted. All of the machines she was hooked up to seemed to be for the sole purpose of monitoring her vitals because of the drugs in her blood supply. There was a saline drip, and she still had bandages around her forearms from Shopkeeper's, but other than that and the handcuffs holding her upper arms to the bed, she looked more or less right as rain…

Other than the purpling bloody nose. Privately, Weiss reminded herself to congratulate Pyrrha the next time she came for a visit. She and Yang had been in and out constantly, fussing over her, and Blake and Ruby dropped by once or twice. Still no word from Winter… but she didn't want to think about that right now, so she returned her attention to the matter at hand.

“Oh…” Emerald sat up straighter, eyes wide with pure fear. “H-hey, Weiss. Mrs. Belladonna.”

Kali seemed to have no time for games. “Is that all you have to say to the young lady you stabbed?”

“No, I… of course not. But I don't know what to say, it was like…”

Weiss waited for her to finish. When she didn't speak again for a few seconds, too plagued by inner demons - or worried about repercussions - to summon the words, she calmly seated herself in the chair at Emerald's bedside, hands folded neatly in her lap.

“Go on.”

“I couldn't think. Couldn't calm down, o-or make my mind focus on anything other than how angry I was with Weiss.”

“Angry? Why were you angry with me?”

Finally, she turned her eyes to glare daggers at the guest. “You got Cinder hurt. Do you even care about that? Because your daddy can't let go of you, he burned down our place and Cinder got hurt! And really bad, Weiss!”

“That isn't fair,” Kali admonished her in a firm tone of voice. “Parents are supposed to be responsible for their children, not the other way around. She can't control what that idiot does any more than Blake could control what I did if I were to settle petty grudges like that.”

“I don't care. She's the cause for it; he would never have made someone set that fire without her being involved. But…” The ire faded, and Emerald's eyes became more haunted than anything. “I didn't want to attack anybody! All I wanted to do was go find Weiss and yell at her, tell her that she owed Cinder, ask what she was going to do to make it right. Th-that’s really… that’s all I wanted, I didn’t…”

Weiss was listening patiently all along, trying to distance herself emotionally from the situation. Then she asked, “Do you know what the doctors have said, about the drugs?”

The haunted aura only intensified, her tan fingers clutching at the white linen sheets. “Yes.”

“Well? What was it? Marijuana?”

“I'm no reefer addict,” she snapped impatiently. “No, I… they said it was opium, and s-some other drug I've never heard of before. Just some letters…”

“Letters?” But even as she asked that, she could see Kali's hand raise to her chin, tapping as she thought. “What is it?”

Barely distracted, she let out a soft “Hm?” that forestalled any more questions for a few seconds as her mind worked through the possibilities. Then she asked Emerald, as if there had been no pause at all, “Were the letters ‘LSD’?”

“I think they might have been?” The lilt at the end made the statement a question.

“Hmm.”

Reaching up to catch her arm, Weiss whispered, “What is it?”

“Lysergic acid diethylamide. It’s an experimental drug being used and studied by psychiatrists.”

“How is it you just… know everything?!”

That made Kali laugh weakly. “If I knew everything, I could have…” But she didn’t finish that sentence. Weiss had no way of knowing what past mistake she was thinking of, because she moved on immediately. “Well, I’ve only heard of these things. I’m no doctor. But I like to know what’s going on in the world. I thought this could have been Dexedrine tablets - Ghira used to talk about those when he would send correspondence home from the war front. But it wasn’t until she said ‘letters’ that I remembered LSD.”

Emerald was nodding, sitting up straighter as if it would take her closer to salvation. “Y-yes, I- I mean, I don’t know anything about this stuff at all, but it was like I was watching myself do it. St- stab…” Tears finally pricked, but she was trying to ignore them. “I couldn’t control anything once they pushed me out.”

“What?”

Weiss had noticed that as well. “Who pushed you out? Of where?”

“I don’t… remember…” Both of Emerald’s fists slammed into her eyes. “AH! What happened to me?!”

“They said you checked yourself out of the hospital,” Kali was saying in a distant voice, eyes unfocused as her mind raced. “But… nobody could tell me how you got home. Your bike is still at my house.”

“Were they lying?” Weiss asked urgently. “Did they kidnap her and… and pay off the nurses, or something?”

“It’s sounding too likely to ignore.” Sitting up straighter, she said, “We have to tell Salem about this. Immediately. If Jacques Schnee is trying to pull strings from behind the scenes-”

“Oh no,” she breathed. When Kali only blinked at her, she looked up into her eyes. “Cinder and me, and Emerald… it’s all my-”

Fingers covered her mouth again. “We don’t have time for that. Emerald, please say you forgive Weiss. She is a victim of this now as much as you are.”

“What?!” But then the poor girl’s red eyes pointed down at Weiss’s bandage before flicking away again. “Oh… well… I don’t know if I can; my Cinder is…”

“She’s hurting just like both you and Weiss are hurting. Like Salem is, even if it was only a little smoke.”

Tears rolled down her cheeks. “It’s still her fault! Who cares if she got herself hurt?” However, her next words were, “I’m sorry… I d-don’t mean to be- I know she’s a Dragon, Cinder told me sh-she’s branded, and it’s… this is all too much. What did they do to me?”

Kali gestured for Weiss to join her. They both worked together to help Weiss stand gently as they could, trying to avoid further aggravating her injury, and made their exit.

“Do you think she’s going to be okay?” Weiss asked once the door was closed and they were further along the hallway.

“I don’t know,” Kali confessed, arm securely around her back as she helped her along. “But this is bad news. Emerald attacked a fellow Dragon; she won’t be let off easy, no matter why it happened. Even worse than that…” She swallowed hard. “Someone has decided to start messing with our minds. If it’s not your father… then we could be in for such a terrible time that we can’t even fathom.”

#princess and the dragons #weiss x yang #freezerburn fanfic #rwby fanfiction #rwbyremnants

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storyplease · 4 years

Text

So I finally watched “Rise of the Guardians” and I have some thoughts about the major themes in the film...

Anyway, so I know this is a kid’s film or whatever, and I know that this probably WAYYY too in the weeds as far as thoughts are concerned, but what is Tumblr even good for if you can’t rant about fictional characters in peace?

Potential spoilers below cut...

Anyway, so the movie centers around mythical character such as the Easter Bunny and Santa Claus, etc, who can be argued are literally and figuratively “unbelievable” beings that require the faith of children (not necessarily the actual knowledge of their existence) to exist. In many ways, they play by the same rules as the American Gods in Neil Gaiman’s story of the same name. But I digress (a theme in my writing, yes?). One of the biggest themes in the movie is the idea of a “center”- each mythical entity has a an unusual “spark” of something that makes them worthy (from what appears to be upon their death) of becoming more than human.

So for example:

Santa Claus: Miracles/Wonder

Easter Bunny: Rebirth/Hope

Tooth Fairy: Remembrance/Connection

Sandy: Joy/Peace

It is established that all of the characters used to be mortal at some point or other, so the universe appears to have a deus ex machina (the Man in the Moon, who appears to run everything, but more on that later) who “decides” when someone is to be bestowed with powers...but who is also rendered intangible to the human beings they depend on for their power to grow until they prove themselves (mostly to children, because children tend to easily trust and believe in all manner of thing without a shred of evidence, and would therefore be much easier to convince to pledge their loyalty to)...somehow.

One of the big parts of Jack Frost’s story arc is that he doesn’t have any memories of who he was before he awoke with his abilities. He doesn’t remember his family or have the ability to have connections with mortals directly, and yet some people do mention his name without seeing him, so it appears that he is able to scrape power here and there. It is also worth mentioning that all of the Guardians appear to be aware of and can interact with Jack, but that they have chosen not to for over 400 years other than a few times where Jack has tried to playfully interact only to be shut down or retaliated against.

When he finally finds his memories, everyone acts really surprised, but it seems odd that this would never have come up before, especially since the Tooth Fairy appears to swoon/love his teeth and might have brought it up (but we shall forgive her a bit as she appears to be absurdly busy running the tooth empire to end all tooth empires).

But the most important part of this revelation is that a lot of Jack Frost’s negative character traits are specifically because he is lonely and has nobody else. He spends his life interacting with a world that cannot see or touch him. Therefore, his center (fun/mischief) becomes twisted and he causes trouble.

When he realizes his past and is able to connect with both mortal children and the other Guardians, his character blossoms! He becomes confident, protective, fun and wisecracking but without malice or bitterness.

He comes into his own, and his power increases.

Which brings me to...you guessed it...the main antagonist of the film.

The character of Pitch is obviously the bad guy. He’s dark, scary, looks kinda like he’s never brushed his teeth unless the toothpaste was made of coal, and is in general menacing and terrifying. He harms the characters, terrifies the children and generally drives the plot for his own selfish ends. After all, he’s known as the “boogeyman.”

His main traits appear to be a penchant for darkness (creating it and hiding in shadow) and causing fear. His lair appears to be in a hole underground that is situated under an old and rotting bed frame. Now there’s a lot of this that could just be taken on the nose. After all, there’s a reason that “there’s a monster under your bed” is a semi-universal kid’s fear.

There’s even a terrible pun about Pitch having a great time in the “Dark Ages.”

The thing is, darkness can mean a lot of things. And so can fear.

Let me back up a bit so I can explain what I’m getting at:

Awhile back, I read an amazingly insightful book called The Gift Of Fear. It has a lot of very good advice on recognizing and using the fear response to protect your safety and your life. Fear is often overlooked as a silly, primal thing, especially when we talk about children and things that go bump in the night, but there is a very good reasons why humans feel a variety of kinds of fear, and many of them are actively useful in preserving your life.

Darkness is essential to life. The day ends, and night falls. Shadows follow our moves and do as we do. Even the human eye cannot bear blue light at night, and artificial lighting has been touted as all kinds of unhealthy by experts and doctors alike.

None of these things are actively evil or wrong, to be sure.

But Pitch has something in common with Jack Frost. And what is that? Why, he is ignored. Nobody believes in him (which I find silly to be honest because I know plenty of kids afraid of the dark or who have nightmares and such).

The whole thing- the theatrical posing, the big scary Villain speech...in the end, Pitch was doing just the same thing that Jack did when he antagonized the Easter Bunny by ruining the egg hunt with frost. He wanted people to pay attention to him, to like him. And because nobody would do so, he decided that negative attention was still attention.

This is backed up by the fact that none of the children are harmed by his nightmare horses when faced with him (they turn into golden sand when touched). They even say, even with thousands of scary black nightmares bearing down on them, that they aren’t scared of him and will protect the Guardians.

I feel like Pitch is overlooking a couple of things when he is trying his ridiculous plan to rule the world in darkness.

First off, he’s backed himself into a corner- he plays the bad guy, of course he isn’t going to win against the heroes. And to some extent, it’s pretty obvious that he knows it. For all his posturing, he often pulls his punches, and even when he destroys Jack’s staff, he still throws it down on the ground and does not take it with him because he is trying to get Jack to see beyond his limitations just as he himself has learned to harness the sand with his darkness.

Secondly, just because kids love Santa and Easter and gifts from tooth fairies, not all kids have perfect upper-middle-class lives like the children in this movie. There is a reason why there are a surprisingly large number of hand-drawn comics that deal with a child making friends with the monster under the bed or even being protected by said monster against an abusive parent or family member.

My feeling here is that Pitch hasn’t truly realized what his purpose is, and that he is actually being held back because....

Pitch’s center is fear.

There’s a reason he’s portrayed as having a lair under a shabby, rotting bed, in darkness. When he was human, his life must have been hellish. I can imagine him hiding in the shadows of his room, crouched under the bed in darkness because the fear of what his father or mother might do to him was eating him alive. In fact, he may have died in that manner, terrified out of his mind and knowing only the darkness to hide him. If this is what the Man in the Moon deemed worthy to change him into his post-mortal form, then is any of this truly his fault?

I might say...no. Being awoken from a hellish world where you are in constant fear to a world in which fear and darkness are the only thing that strengthen you would be its own sort of hell.

We don’t get to see Pitch’s past, but ostensibly the Tooth Fairy has it and knows of it. A tooth is knocked out at the end, so ostensibly it will go in Pitch’s box, or the box of whoever he was when he was mortal.

But furthermore, what if Pitch were able to change the way he thinks about his power and his strength? What if he uses his darkness to conceal children who are in danger, or helps those who are imprisoned to escape? What if he guides children away from danger by using their fear to guide them? What I am saying is that “playing the villain” seems to be the most obvious thing when you’ve only ever known an existence in which you are hated and told you are wrong and bad.

However, if we really sit down and think about it, colored eggs and toys are no more “good” than shielding the weak and vulnerable with your shadows and putting the fear of...something that bumps in the night in the hearts of predators while guiding the fear of the young from forks in outlets and jumps from high places.

In the end, locking a being like Pitch away is a foolish idea because in his loneliness in the darkness, his fear and terror will only grow, driving him into madness in his isolation. Pitch not only has to learn to conquer his own fears (fear or being rejected, fear of being hated) but to also realize that he can be more than a flat villainous character if he wishes to thrive.

He just has to get past the fear.

#rise of the guardians #meta #jack frost #pitch #on fear #on lonliness #tw for light descriptions of abusive behavior

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tommyparkerr · 4 years

Text

3am | Shawn Mendes x Reader

Due to popular demand, I’m back with another of my dusty docs:) I wasn’t sure how well Kisses would go over but it ended up being a fan favorite even though it’s not Marvel? Soooo here y’all go, I have another dusty SM doc sitting around so if you guys want to see that one too let me know!

Also, I’m in the midst of redoing my tag lists, so if you want to be on a specific tag list you can find the link in my bio, here, or down below!

Words: 2.7k

Warning: Anxiety

Notes: Y/F/N = Your Full Name

-Masterlist-

3 A M :

You were sleeping quite peacefully for once; it was raining, which explained why. You hadn’t gotten much sleep the past couple of days, as your boyfriend had been giving you radio silence. He was on tour, yes, and he was busy, yes, but he still should’ve had time to FaceTime you or call you or even just reply to one of your texts. And usually he did, which was why you were confused. Then that confusion had turned into worry, worry into stress, stress into anxiety, and anxiety into sleepless nights.

Thank the heavens for rain.

You were out like a light—that was until a loud thumping came from your front door that definitely was not the rain. You groaned, pulling your pillow over your head in an effort to block out the noise. It didn’t work, though; the pounding started up again a moment later and cut straight through your not-so-promising lump of feathers.

You frustratedly tossed the pillow aside and got out of bed, peeling your tired eyes open. Turning the lamp on was much harder than it should’ve been, as was putting on a pair of sweatpants, brushing your hair out of your face, and walking to the door. But everything was much harder at 3am—especially for those who were only running on two hours of sleep.

“I’m coming, I’m coming! Chill out!” you called out, extremely irritated with whoever was making such a racket at this time of night. As you unlocked the door and started to swing it open, you mumbled, “If this is a prank, I swear to-“

But it wasn’t a prank at all.

A soaked and shivering frame stood outside in nothing but some jeans, a black tee, and a simple jacket. His hair was a mess, the once lively curls now clinging to his forehead in flat strands. But what alarmed you the most was his droopy, bloodshot eyes. They looked exactly how they always looked after he’d been crying.

“Shawn?” you whispered in disbelief.

He tried to crack a grin, but it came out looking more like a grimace. “Surprise.”

You blinked twice then came to your senses, stepping back and opening the door wider. “What the hell were you thinking, going out in a storm like this? Are you insane?! Get inside!”

He faithfully obeyed, looking lost as soon as the door was shut. Your brows furrowed. Shawn was never this quiet, and he’d been to your house enough times that he shouldn’t look so out of place standing in your front entryway. But he was and he did, and you intended to find out why.

First, though, he needed to warm up.

“Take off your shoes and go change. You left some clothes on top of my dresser last time you were here. After that, come back out to the living room, okay?”

Shawn simply nodded and did what you told him, bending down to untie his shoes and going straight to your bedroom. You busied yourself with turning on the fireplace and making some hot tea. The tea was less for the purpose of drinking and more for giving his hands something to do; he always felt much calmer when there was something in them, whether that be his guitar, a pencil, a pick, or—in this case—a cup of tea.

As the tea was steeping you heard Shawn trod into the living room, pause for a moment, spin around, and go in the opposite direction. Seconds later you could feel him staring holes in the back of your head and knew he’d made his way to you.

“I shouldn’t have come here, should’ve I?”

If it were any quieter you wouldn’t have heard it, but it surprised you just as much as if he would’ve yelled; it was the words that caught your attention, not the volume he spoke them with.

You frowned and turned to face Shawn, looking confusedly into his deep brown eyes. “Why do you say that?”

He shrugged indifferently, staring down at the hardwood floor with his hands in his pockets. “You don’t seem very happy to see me, is all. Not that I blame you for that. I mean, it’s three o’clock in the morning and I know you’ve been busy lately so you’re probably exhausted and irritated at me for waking you up, and the more I think about it the more I’m beginning to realize just how terrible of an idea this was, so I’ll just leave now and you can go back to bed in peace-“

“Woah! Shawn, slow down,” you interrupted, stepping forward and laying your hand on his arm to keep him from turning around. “I don’t want you to go and I am happy to see you, I swear it. I was just surprised, that’s all,” you assured him, moving your thumb back and forth across his skin. He looked at you but didn’t react, only staring as you tried your best to comfort him. You sighed, knowing he was going to need some more time and coaxing in order to tell you why: one, he was home early, and two, why he was at your home. “Let’s go to the living room, yeah? I’ve got the fireplace going.”

Shawn nodded, emotionless, and left to go sit in front of the fire without further comment. Silently you carried the tea over and gave it to him to hold, then gathered up a nearby blanket and tucked it around his shivering shoulders. You eyed his dripping wet hair and retrieved a towel and hair dryer, fully prepared to baby him for the remainder of the night. You didn’t mind, though. He always took care of you when you needed it and you were adamant to return the favor.

“I’m gonna dry your hair, okay, bub?” you said as you set up behind him. He nodded again and sat absolutely still as you completed your task. You giggled when you saw his curls fight their way back on top of his head, even though they’d been flat just minutes before.

“You feeling warmer now, hun?” you asked, combing your fingers through his wild hair. He leaned into your touch as an answer, and you smiled at his puppy-like manner. You scooted to sit beside him and patted your lap. “Come here.” Shawn looked at you a bit questionably and hesitated, to which you rolled your eyes at and mockingly said, “It may be three in the morning but that doesn’t mean I’ve got all day to wait for your six foot, two inch ass to lay down.”

This garnered a little smile out of him and he finally gave in, setting his half-drank tea to the side and placing his head in your lap. You let Shawn adjust until he was comfortable before resuming running your fingers through his curls. The tension in his shoulders seemed to disappear at the simple action, and the longer you went on the more relaxed he became.

“Y/N?” Shawn asked after a while. You hummed, tugging slightly on the hair you had between your fingers, causing his eyes to flutter shut and something that could only be described as a purr to sound in his throat. It took him a few moments to speak up again. “I missed you.”

Sensing that this was Shawn’s way of starting a serious conversation you kept it as comfortable as possible, going for a simple, “I missed you too, Shawn,” until he was ready to go on.

He found your free hand and began to play with your fingers. You let him, knowing this was part of his whole ‘keeping his hands busy’ method of coping. Besides, you loved it when he mindlessly used you to help counter his nerves; it felt strangely intimate.

“I’m only here until tomorrow night, then I fly to New York for the next show,” he murmured matter-of-factly.

“Why didn’t you stay with the crew?” you asked, hoping to get some answers out of him now that he was talking.

Shawn was silent for several minutes, gathering his thoughts. “It got a little too much,” he admitted in a small voice. “And the only way I knew how to fix it was to come home.”

You stayed calm even as your heart was sinking. You knew he regularly struggled with anxiety—especially on tour—but it had never been so bad that he’d felt the only way he could battle it was to take himself out of his element completely. “Wanna talk about it?”

He stopped fiddling with your fingers and instead interlaced them with his, using it as a grounding point. “I just...l’ve been so on edge lately, and there are always so many people—lots and lots of people. And I love them all and I’m so grateful for them and I never want them to feel like I‘m not, but sometimes I just need my people, you know? I’m left alone with all these people and I manage to get out, but as soon as I get out I’m surrounded by more people, and I get out again but then more people come and it never stops,” Shawn rambled, his voice shaking unsteadily. You quickly came to the conclusion that he was still on edge—that his anxiety was still spiked—and prepared yourself for an imminent breakdown.

“And last night I felt like I was disappointing all of these people, you know? It wasn’t my best show; I knew it wasn’t, everyone knew it wasn’t, I know, and then the walls were closing in and I couldn’t breathe and I needed somebody, but nobody was there because I didn’t tell them where I was going and I didn’t even remember how I got to the room I was in or what that room even was, I just knew that I had to get out. I had to get out and I needed you because you always know what to do but you weren’t there and eventually Geoff found me and got me out of it but I still wasn’t right and he told Andrew, and the next thing I know I’m standing on your doorstep at three in the morning.”

His breaths were visibly coming in a lot more shallow now, and that was when you knew your conclusion had been right.

Shawn was in the middle of an anxiety attack.

“Can you do something for me, baby?” you asked softly, continuing to run your fingers through his hair so Shawn could use it as another grounding point.

“Y-yeah?”

“Can you turn around and look up at me?”

It took a few moments but he did comply. It broke your heart to see his pale face and watery eyes, but you made sure you didn’t show it. If you exhibited any sign of panic or weakness, it would only exacerbate his own.

“Hey there, big guy,” you smiled, squeezing his hand. Shawn’s expression didn’t change, and when a tear escaped you smoothly wiped it off before returning to his hair. “What do you see? Tell me something you see.”

He swallowed and his eyes started to nervously flutter around, looking for something to land on. You waited patiently. “The ceiling.”

“What does it look like?” you prompted.

“It’s shadowy from the fire. It’s dark,” he said, the words leaving his tongue in a panicked rush.

“And what do you hear?”

Shortly he answered, “The rain.”

“Good,” you said, your voice still calm even though you wanted nothing more than to cry at the sight of the broken boy on your lap. You swallowed past the lump in your throat and continued on, knowing he needed you now more than ever. You couldn’t let him down—you wouldn’t let him down. Tracing small patterns on the back of his hand and tugging on the roots of his hair just enough to keep him grounded, you asked, “Can you smell anything?”

Shawn’s breathing pattern changed as he began to breathe through his nose, and you were happy to see that it was in a positive way; it was usually around this point where his breaths became deeper and more even, but you were never sure until you got there. Sometimes he found it impossible to switch his source of breath, but those were only the really bad ones. You’d experienced just two of those, and as much as you hoped to never see another one, you were sure it’d happen again in the future.

“I smell your lotion,” Shawn murmured after several minutes of silence, letting his eyes close from exhaustion. “Winter Candy Apple. I bought some more for you yesterday since you said you were running low, but I forgot to bring it.”

Your heart fluttered at the sentiment. It was really hard not to smile not only because of what he said, but because of the fact he said it; if he was speaking more it meant you were nearing the end. “That’s okay,” you responded. “Is there anything you can taste?”

“Mint. From the gum I was chewing on the flight here.”

“Just one last thing now, okay?” you said encouragingly, and he nodded. Some color had returned to his face, making you feel much better. “Do you remember what I’m gonna ask you?”

“What I feel,” he answered, simultaneously squeezing your hand. “You’re gonna ask me what I feel.”

“Exactly. Can you answer that for me?”

Shawn opened his eyes and blinked up at you, looking slightly dazed. “I love you.”

You gave him a look. “Shawn-“

“I’m okay now, Y/N,” he whispered, reaching up with his free hand to touch your cheek. “I love you. That’s what I feel.”

Your heart skipped a couple beats as your brain tried to catch up to what he was saying. When it did you shook your head, taking his hand from your face and kissing the back of it. “I love you too, Shawn Peter Raul Mendes. So much.”

Shawn smiled back, his eyes exhausted but full of life—unlike how they had looked earlier, dim and dark and dreary. “How was your day?”

You laughed, almost bursting into tears at his selfless nature. You wanted to point out that he’d just had an anxiety attack so your day was bound to have been better than his, but instead you said, “Well, I was pretty busy missing a handsome brown haired, brown eyed boy all day—I don’t know if you know him—but by the end of it I was simply exhausted. So I went to bed, but then this guy wakes me up at three o’clock in the morning, standing outside in the freezing rain without any kind of warmth or protection.”

Shawn grinned. “That guy sounds like an idiot.”

“Oh, he is,” you grinned back. “But he’s my idiot.”

Still grinning Shawn closed his eyes again, resting peacefully on your lap. Your hand returned to his hair and his smile softened, signaling that he was either falling asleep or that he was lost in thought. You didn’t have to wait too long to find out which one it was, though, as his mouth opened a few minutes later and quietly murmured, “I’m gonna marry you someday, Y/F/N.”

Countless emotions and thoughts flooded through you at that moment, powerful enough to take your breath away. You blinked away tears, and you couldn’t help but be glad Shawn still had his eyes closed.

There were a lot of things you could’ve said, but they all escaped your mind before your tongue could form the words. Shawn’s smile changed again to a pleased one, and you knew that he’d figured out your reaction without having to look. It made you slightly annoyed that he could read you like an open book, but more so it made you love him even more.

You leaned down to kiss him, your lips moving soft and slow. “Okay,” you whispered against his mouth, not trusting your voice.

“Okay?” Shawn repeated, amused, opening his eyes to tuck a loose piece of hair behind your ear. “I tell you I’m going to marry you and all I get is ‘okay’?”

You laughed, pulling away and shaking your head in disbelief. “You’re such a little shit, you know that?”

“But I’m your little shit,” he said with a triumphant grin.

“Yes,” you agreed. “You’re my little shit. But if you follow through on what you just told me, then that would make me your little shit as well.”

Shawn sat up, smiling as he cupped your face with both of his hands and kissed you again. “Trust me, honey,” he said between kisses, his eyes staring lovingly into yours. “There’s no one else I’d rather claim as such.”

---

Permanent Tag List: @dahliaspidey @spideygirl2003 @trashqueenbitch @celestialparker @toxic-pineapple @ofserien @chewymoustachio @propertyofmarvel @clementime-skies

Shawn Tag List: @mendesficsxbombay

#shawn mendes #shawn mendes x reader #shawn mendes x y/n #shawn mendes x you #shawn mendes fluff #shawn mendes hurt/comfort #hurt/comfort #shawn mendes fic #shawn mendes fanfiction #shawn mendes fandom #shawn mendes imagine #shawn mendes blurb #one shot #i forgot to add a keep reading link to this im so sorry yall #in my defense ive been sick so my head is a lil woozy still #i’ll fix it as soon as possible!!

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ohemgeeitscoley · 4 years

Text

Rey doesn't think when she calls Ben to go into her emails to send off her draft email with her final to her professor.

It isn't until she's off the phone that she remembers all the other draft emails are to him and vary from confessing her love to him and describing in detail what exactly she wants to do to his body.

No, Rey didn't think this through at all.

These letters to you (1/1)

Fandom: Star Wars

Pairing: Rey/Ben Solo (Reylo)

Note: This came from this prompt from the ReylosPrompt Twitter account.

Curious Cat Prompt: "Ben finds a draft on Rey’s email addressed to him confessing her love and lust for him."

@andyouweremine and @storiesofimagination are some of the best betas a girl could ever ask for. They make sure that my tenses stay correct and reassure me the entire time that I’m writing. They are the best cheerleaders and I wouldn’t know what to do without them. <3

Read below or on AO3.

Please pick up. Please pick up. If there is any sort of fairness in the galaxy, please pick up your fucking phone--

"Hello?" Ben's voice is low, deeper than usual. It's his mostly asleep voice. Rey hates that she has thought enough about the variances of Ben's voice to know the different tones almost as much as she hates the fact that a sleepy Ben Solo is almost always her favorite version of Ben.

Ben had been one of the first people Rey had met when she transferred in as a sophomore. He had been in his first year at the law school. They both fought for the right to study under a specific tree toward the edge of the campus. It was quiet, far enough away from the hot spots to really attract much attention or noise. The leaves were big and provided plenty of shade from the sun. The ground was soft and mostly free of any large rocks or bouts of even landscaping.

It was Rey's favorite spot.

They fought over the tree for two months, both of them refusing to leave and each attempting to annoy the other into giving the spot up. It didn't take long for them to realize that when they were just sitting under the tree, quietly, together studying, it wasn't so bad.

It was actually nice, not being alone.

Rey moved into Ben's apartment the following fall and they'd been best friends ever since.

Rey's fairly certain she's been in love with him for roughly the same amount of time.

Not that she has the time to be getting lost down that particular rabbit hole.

"Thank God, you answered," Rey responds, twisting the cord of the phone around one of her fingers. Everything about the diner she works at is a little bit kitschy and old, but having to make a call on a phone actually attached to a wall with cords is a whole different experience. "I'm so sorry I woke you up. I know you were up late studying."

"Rey?" Ben asks while yawning. Rey can hear him shuffle around in his bed. "It's not even 6 AM, is everything okay?"

"You answered," Rey smiles, hoping Ben knows that she is practically beaming at him through the phone. "Everything is going to be fine. My final paper is due at 6. On the dot. I was too nervous to send it last night when I finished it. I was going to send it in this morning, after I had a chance to at least look over it for grammar and spelling, but I'm me and I--"

"Slept through your first four alarms and barely made it out the door for work?" Ben interrupts.

"Yes." Rey sighs, rolling her eyes. "Anyways. You know I can't use my cell at work, I'm probably going to get shit for this call, and you're the only number I have memorized. So I really, really need you to get on my computer, go to my email and send in my paper. I have a draft saved and everything. All you have to do is get in my drafts folder and hit send."

"Sure," Ben agrees. "Password for your laptop?"

"Capital d-y-at sign-d-hashtag-number 3-exclamation point."

"I'm on it." Rey can hear Ben's door open, the same squeak sounding over the phone that she complains about every night when he's anxious from studying and walks back and forth from his room to the kitchen every twenty minutes. "Consider it done."

"You're the best roommate, slash friend, slash just all around hero of my life," Rey blushes, stopping just short of adding 'probably the love of my life' at the end of her sentence. Thinking about her feelings for Ben is definitely a rabbit hole she is better off to avoid. "I don't know what I would do without you."

"It's the least I can do if I'm really the only phone number you have memorized."

"It's 2020, Ben," Rey teases. "The fact that I have your number memorized is really impressive."

"Why mine?"

Rey can hear water running in the background, a cabinet opening and a drawer shutting. Rey hates that she can clearly see Ben in their kitchen, making coffee, probably with a slightly grumpy look on his face because Rey knows that she put the grinder and the filters back in the wrong spot. She hates it the same way she hates knowing that Ben won't say anything about the misplaced items to her, and that if she were home he would make her cup of coffee first.

The way Ben always takes care of her first drives Rey crazy most days.

"I figure the only time I'm ever going to need to call someone without having access to my phone would be in a real emergency. And you're the person I would want to call." Rey bites her lip, shaking her head as if she could shake away how vulnerable she sounds to her own ears. "Or, if I've been arrested. And if that's the case, you're the only lawyer I know."

Ben snorts. "I have to actually finish next semester and pass the bar to be a real lawyer."

"You're going to pass," Rey gently reminds him. It's the same conversation they've been having since the beginning of the year. "And then you're going to kick legal ass all over New York."

Ben's laugh is warm. "You should go back to work, don't worry about your paper. I won't let you down."

"I know you won't. Text me what you want for dinner. I'll pick it up on my way home from my last final."

Rey hangs the phone back up on the wall and walks back out into the diner. She smiles, grabbing a rag to wipe down the front counter. Her nerves finally calm knowing that Ben wouldn't let her down and she no longer had to worry about failing one of her last classes.

Ben would just go into her draft emails and send the email on to her professor.

Into her draft emails.

Her draft emails.

Fuck.

***

Ben is not surprised when he opens Rey's email and sees that she has 37 draft emails. It's honestly exactly what he expects.

He blows across the top of his mug, watching as the steam from the cup scatters. The coffee's still too hot to drink, but it's 5:57 in the morning and Ben's only had 2 hours of sleep.

If he survives law school and passes the bar, Ben is going to need a three week long nap.

Taking a drink from the mug, Ben grimaces as the too hot liquid burns his tongue and throat, and yet at the same time warms his soul. Ben opens the draft emails, seeing the one at the top to Rey's professor. It's easy enough to look at, make sure that there's an attachment attached and that Rey's message isn't full of 2 AM Rey snark.

It's sent by 5:59.

Ben's glad that he woke up to his phone going off and that he answered. Usually, answering unknown numbers isn't something Ben does, but he's always a little more cautious when Rey is gone and it's a local number. Just in case.

Answering a spam call and wasting 5 seconds but knowing Rey is fine is worth it.

Everything about the call fell into the 'reasons to tell Rey about his feelings' column in the pro/con list he kept in his mind. Rey had his number memorized in case of emergencies.

Somehow Rey Johnson had decided that he was worthy and could be trusted to be someone she could rely on.

And for Rey, with all of the abandonment issues Ben knows about, to trust him to be there for her… it means more than Ben can say.

Falling completely in love with his best friend was not on his list of things to complete before finishing law school.

Though he thinks it might be the most worthwhile thing he's done in the three years. If he wasn't absolutely terrified of Rey not feeling the same way and ruining their friendship, Ben knows that loving her, being loved by her… that would be the honor of a lifetime.

Tilting his head back, Ben reaches for his mug and takes another drink. These are the kinds of thoughts that Ben knows he cannot dwell on so early and on such little sleep. He's going to fuck up one day and send her a text message confessing that he does actually reorganize their kitchen cabinets sometimes just because he thinks that the way she scrunches her nose when she's confused and angry is the cutest thing in the world.

Maybe he'll just text her that he loves her and not in a friend way. But in a ‘very real, very romantic, wants to take her on dates, and make her toes curl in pleasure’ kind of way.

Which is why Ben needs to go back to bed and try to sleep before studying again. His last final is tomorrow and if he isn't smart enough to list ten reasons why texting Rey about how pretty he thinks her freckles are in the sunlight, well, he has no idea how he's going to pass his trademarks and false advertising final.

Ben is just starting to close the laptop when he sees his email on one of the draft emails. He knows that he shouldn't snoop in Rey's draft emails, but it's addressed to him and it's probably just a dumb meme that she forgot to hit send on.

Because Rey sends Ben a lot of dumb memes. It's one of the things he loves about her.

Ben pushes the screen up and is stunned to find that there are a bunch of emails to him.

Before he can think his way out of doing it, Ben opens the first email.

Dear Ben:

I came home early from work and you were shirtless and exercising in the living room

First: rude.

Second: I've decided it's unfair for you to ever wear shirts and you should be shirtless all the time

Third: actually, no one else needs to know about this gross injustice and you should only not wear shirts around me

Fourth: have you always been so... big?

Fifth: I need to go to bed and think more about this.

Yours,

Rey

Ben takes a deep breath. That was not a dumb meme.

That was the furthest thing from a dumb meme.

Ben slowly releases his breath, closing out of the draft email. He should stop. He knows he should shut down Rey’s computer and that he absolutely should not open another draft email to him.

But he needs to know what else they say. For the first time in three years, there's a spark of hope inside Ben that maybe Rey feels something for him. So he looks down the list of drafts and opens one from 6 months ago on his birthday.

Ben,

It's your birthday. I know you aren't comfortable with attention being solely focused on you, but I'm so glad that you seemed to be enjoying yourself tonight.

You deserve it. You're always so hard on yourself. I wish you could see you the way I see you. How kind and caring and thoughtful you can be. It never fails to amaze me, just how wonderful you really are.

You looked gorgeous. I had to stop myself from telling you just what seeing you in that suit did to me. I almost told you how badly I want you.

I drank too much. I hate that you thought you had to leave the club to make sure that I made it back home okay, but I also… God Ben, you are always taking care of me.

No one else has done that for me.

You got me in bed, made sure I could change out of my outfit (which did you like my outfit? I thought you looked like you appreciated it when I walked out of my room, but you didn't say anything. I mean of course you didn't say anything. But I hope you did. I wore it for you.) you even brought water and aspirin for me to take tomorrow morning when I wake up.

You kissed my forehead when you tucked me in.

I just want to kiss you.

Well, I want to do more than just kiss you. But kissing seems like a good place to start.

Which is how I ended up here. Reading all of these unsent emails to you. I almost hit send on the first one I wrote. My feelings for you haven't changed.

But I'm so so scared.

I am terrified Ben.

I can't lose you. You've become the one constant in my life and I don't know what I would do without you in it.

What if you don't feel the same way? What if I ruin everything?

I should go to bed. I just wish that I were in your arms instead of alone.

I'm so tired of being alone.

Anyways.

Happy birthday, Ben.

Yours,

Rey

Ben reads the email four times before it really clicks in his brain that Rey likes him. Rey has apparently liked him for at least six months, but maybe even longer since she referred to sending her first draft email and that her feelings hadn't changed.

Her feelings. For him.

His birthday had been the best birthday he could remember. Rey had planned the entire event. She had been so excited to celebrate him that it was hard not to embrace it.

Ben's birthdays usually consisted of a phone call from his parents, maybe lunch or dinner if they were in the same city, and a few text messages from others.

Rey woke him up with pancakes and waffles, because no one should have to choose between the two best breakfast foods on their birthday, and a detailed itinerary of all her ideas for the rest of the day.

She spent the entire day with him doing whatever he wanted to do. Watching his favorite movies, ordering lunch from his favorite restaurant, confirming with everyone the dinner plans and post-dinner drink plans she had made.

Ben had almost told Rey about his feelings for her that night. After reading her email, he wishes that he had.

How much time had they missed out on being together because they were both scared?

Ben shakes his head, he still isn't sure that this all is real. Maybe Rey hadn't really called and he is still asleep. Maybe this is all a dream.

He downs the last of the coffee in his mug, running a finger across the chip on the side.

Rey had tried throwing the mug out after she moved in, saying something about how they could just use his mugs. Ben had ignored her, placing the pastel colored mugs, chips and all, next to his glossy black ones in the cabinet. He told her the blue one was his favorite and it wasn't going anywhere.

The smile she had given him lit up the entire room.

He sets the mug back down on the table, scrolling down until he finds the first draft to him. I almost hit send on the first one I wrote. The email is dated the day before she moved in.

He opens it.

Ben,

I will probably never send this email, but I also don't know that I won't. I know that I want to send it. I want to be brave and to know the truth.

The thought of doing it is just scary though.

You know that you're my best friend right? It's hard for me to imagine a world without you in it, which for me is a lot. You haven't even been in my life for a year and you've already managed to make it so that I don't know what I'll do when you decide to leave.

That's what people do, Ben, they leave me.

It's just a fact in my life and knowing that, honestly, has kept me safe. I keep people at a distance, which wasn't hard growing up because I just bounced around from foster home to foster home and school to school. But now I'm here and I'm not going anywhere new anytime soon.

And then there's you.

For some reason, I believe you're not going anywhere either.

Which is scarier to me. I've never had anyone stay before. I don't know what to do with that.

A part of me needs to believe that you're going to leave. So when you do eventually move on and leave me behind it'll at least be something I knew was going to eventually happen.

Anyways. I've gotten really sidetracked here.

I've been going to therapy. Which you already know, since you're the one who kept telling me that it was something I should look into. Thanks for that by the way. You were right.

She suggested that I write letters to the people who have left or hurt me. Not to send, but to just, get my thoughts and feelings out of my head.

It helped.

Which is why I'm writing this email to you, even though I'll never be brave enough to send it. I have a lot of thoughts and feelings about you, Ben. I need them out of my head.

I love you.

I am in love with you.

Not in a platonic way. In a very romantic way.

Almost everything you do drives me crazy and makes my heart warm and my face glow.

I want to kiss you and hold your hand. I want to find out if my head will fit in the crook of your neck when you hold me the way I think that it will. I want to commit the taste of your skin to my memory. I want to know the marks on your body better than I know my own. I want to know what you look like when you lose control and give into pleasure.

It's really apparent, I think, the way I feel about you.

Only you don't seem to notice. And I need to admit to myself that it's because you don't think of me that way.

Which is fine. I get it.

You're you… and I'm just, well, I'm just me.

But I'm moving in tomorrow and I just needed to get these thoughts out. Otherwise I'm a little worried I might just blurt it out when you help me wash the dishes or eat dinner with me. Which I'm sure sounds a little strange, but after a lifetime without these moments…

I imagine living with you is only going to make me fall more in love with you.

Maybe I'll just have to write you more.

Yours,

Rey

Ben doesn't bother to count how many times he rereads the email. He just keeps going back to the top as soon as he reads her name and starts again. He doesn't stop until he is sure he could repeat every word without looking at the screen.

And then he continues to read the email again, just to make sure.

Rey loves him.

Even with the words clearly on the screen for Ben to see, it's hard for him to believe. He's been in love with Rey since before she moved in. The idea that Rey has felt the same way the entire time doesn't make sense.

Ben is objectively smart. He isn't even shy about his intelligence. In fact any given classmate of his would likely describe him as an insufferable know it all. Rey loving him without Ben catching on for over two years is inconceivable. He would have noticed. He would have seen the signs. Certainly he would--

He reads the email again. And again. And again.

Every time he tries to find a way to read anything into it beyond 'Rey has admitted in three different emails, to various degrees, that she is physically attracted to you and that she is in love with you' he rereads the emails.

He doesn't read any more beyond the three. There are plenty of drafts to him that are unread, but he grasps the threads between them to form the overall picture without needing to read the individual emails.

He feels guilty if he thinks for too long about reading the ones he did. He has information now that he didn't have before. He reasons that it is information that he should have though. Because now that he knows and he thinks to any given memory of Rey, with just a tiny bit of certainty that Rey loves him…

Well it's the easiest thing in the world to see.

When he really thinks about it, Rey doesn't hide the way she loves him, she shines with it. He can see it in the way she smiles at him when he pulls the blanket from the back of the couch and tucks it around her during a movie. Her face soft and warm as she instinctively burrows into the heat.

He can see it in the way she keeps finding reasons to touch his arm when they are walking. Her hand guiding his elbow when she's giving directions. A finger tapping on his wrist when she wants him to follow her gaze. Her arm interlocked with his when she's had just a little too much to drink to still be steady in her heels.

It's certainly the way she trusts that he won't let her fall.

Ben closes the laptop, stretching as he stands. He places the empty coffee mug in the sink, rinsing out the small drops of coffee lingering in the bottom of the glass. The time on the stove clock mocks him.

7:34.

Rey isn't going to be home for hours. She'll go straight from the diner to her final. And he doesn't want to worry her by texting her. Especially when he knows she won't have a lot of time, if any, to text him back.

He isn't even sure what he would say to her.

He could study. He should study. He tries to study, but it's pointless. He can't really focus when at least half of his brain is still focused on Rey's emails.

Ben waits. Impatiently watching the clock and attempting to will time to pass faster. He reads his note cards in between planning the possible ways his conversation with Rey may go when she finally, finally gets home.

It's a long day.

***

Rey glances down at her phone for approximately the millionth time on her walk from the diner to campus. She's almost run into ten different people while walking because she's too focused on her phone and not where she is going.

There are no messages from Ben. No missed calls either.

Maybe Ben didn't see the emails. There's no way Ben would see the draft emails to him and not read them. And if he read them he absolutely would have texted her about them by now.

Right? Right.

Unless he thought that letting her down over a text message or a phone call is too impersonal. Maybe he is just waiting for her to get home to break her heart.

She should have just turned in the paper late. So what if she failed and had to retake the class over the summer and figure out a way to pay for it out of pocket? At least she would still have her best friend.

A drop of water hits Rey's face, Rey looks up from her phone and glares at the darkened sky. She doesn't remember rain being mentioned in the weather forecast, but that hardly matters as it starts raining harder.

Rey checks one more time for any messages before sliding her phone into her bag and running the rest of the way to class. She makes it inside of the building just before a large round of thunder and the rain starts to pour.

She sits at her desk, waiting for the rest of her classmates to show up. She pulls out her phone, debating if she should send Ben a message.

Hey! By now you probably read the emails. This is really embarrassing and obviously I should have deleted them instead of saving them. I'm an idiot. Please let me know when you need me to move out by. Sorry for making this so awkward.

You find two years worth of love letters and you have NOTHING to say to me??????

I assume that if you felt anything similar toward me you would have said something by now. Can we just pretend that you never saw them? I don't want this to change everything.

The professor walks in, handing off the test packets to another student to begin passing around.

There's not enough time for Rey to address any of this with Ben in a message. But she can't stomach the idea of not hearing from him at all before going home.

Rey: Hey! Getting ready to start my final, you never said what you want me to grab for dinner on my way home?

***

Rey hands in her test to her professor with a tight smile and a small wave. She's pretty sure she passed, which at this point, is all she can hope for.

She spent half of the time thinking of different scenarios that could be a possibility when she went back to the apartment. Anything near passing would be fine.

She walks out of the classroom and pulls out her phone. She has two messages from Ben.

Ben: Actually, I was thinking I would make dinner. Something to celebrate your last final.

Ben: Maybe something to distract me from studying.

Rey sighs as she walks toward the exit of the building. Maybe Ben didn't read the draft emails after all. Even if he didn't have feelings for her, surely they'd be enough to at least distract him.

Rey had poured her heart out in some of those emails. She knows there are at least a few where she went on and on about what she thought about Ben's body and the way his hair looked with him growing it out. A few where she made it clear about her thoughts about how kissable his lips looked, how she wondered what his fingers would feel like tracing her curves.

Even if he didn't have feelings for her, certainly he would be distracted by some of those emails.

Maybe she won't go home. Maybe she can avoid Ben long enough that she won't have to find out if he read the emails or not. She won't have to find out if she's ruined one of the best things in her life.

The sun is bright when Rey steps outside. The sidewalks are a darker grey, small puddles pooled around the cracks and uneven slabs.

Rey zips her jacket up, shivering slightly as the wind picks up speed.

She spends most of the walk home trying to fight against her disappointment at the thought that Ben hadn't gone through the emails to him. She had spent so much of her energy imagining Ben breaking it to her that he didn't feel the same way, but a part of her had been hoping that maybe, maybe he felt the same.

The idea that Ben just didn't read the emails was worse.

Maybe Rey should just tell him. Get her feelings out in the open and see what comes from it. There was a chance, a small chance, but still a chance that he felt the same way. Or that he could be open to the idea.

Rey: Sounds good! Need me to stop for anything? Dessert? Wine? Hard alcohol to help with the studying?

Ben doesn't respond until she's almost home.

Ben: No. The only thing missing is you.

***

Ben fidgets with the pen in his hand, twirling it in between his fingers. The pasta is done, the french bread is in the oven.

The only thing that is missing is Rey.

He glances down at his phone to check and see if Rey had responded, but there's no notification. She should be home soon and Ben still doesn't know what he's going to do when he sees her.

He knows what he wants to do. He doesn't want to waste anymore time. He wants to tell her that she's beautiful, because she is, even if she'll fight it because she always complains about how gross she feels after a shift at the diner when she has to head straight to class. She’s always beautiful though, and now he just wants to tell her that. He wants to be able to tell her that when she wakes up in the morning and she’s scrunching her face up against the harshness of the sun sneaking in, or when she is passionate about something and it lights up her entire face.

He wants to tell her that he loves her. That he has been in love with her the entire time too. He’s just not sure how.

It doesn't seem like enough to just say that he loves her. She wrote him fucking love letters. And even though Ben only read three, he knows that there are more and that they are just as lovely and somehow all about her feelings for him. She deserves more than just him saying that he feels the same way.

She deserves to know about the day he realized he was in love with her. She deserves to know about the way the slope of her neck into her shoulder drives him crazy. She deserves to know that he pretends to fall asleep during their movie nights because then she'll fall asleep and curl herself around him on the couch.

The oven beeps and Ben stands from the table, he closes his book, grabbing his note cards and pens and highlighters. He dumps the items into his bedroom, before walking back into the kitchen to pull the french bread out from the oven.

Ben's sliding the bread onto a cutting board, knife in his hand, when the door opens and Rey walks in.

Ben struggles to remember how to breathe as he stares at her. She looks beautiful. But she's nervous, her fingers are playing with the sleeve of her jacket, pulling and twisting at the loose fabric. She shuts the door, taking a step into the kitchen.

She's staring at Ben and he can see it now. She loves him and he can see it. How had he never noticed it before?

Maybe he really was an idiot.

He had spent all day fighting his own nerves, trying to come up with the perfect plan on how to tell Rey that he never thought about what she must have spent the entire day doing.

Obviously, she knew that she sent him into her draft emails and that there was a chance that he would see the emails.

Did she know that he read them? Is that why she is looking at him with wide eyes, her mouth slightly open, as if she is almost about to say something, but she doesn't.

Of course she's worried that he doesn't feel the same way. Why else would she keep writing him draft emails while not saying anything or giving him any real signs about her feelings?

He sets the knife down next to the bread and takes a step toward her.

"Dinner smells good," she says, a little breathless.

Ben doesn't say anything in response, he just takes another step, closing the distance between him. Rey glances up at him, her body tense as she takes a small step back.

Ben reaches out for her, his hand settling against her lower back, gently urging her to come closer to him.

"Ben," she breathes, stepping forward, her hand hovering over his bicep for a second before she commits and rests her hand against the sleeve of his shirt.

"It was the first night you stayed over," Ben says, brushing a stray piece of Rey's hair behind her ear. "It was… two, maybe three months before you moved in. You came over to study. We had dinner first and then you demanded that we watch a movie before we started studying. Something about how our brains needed a break and we'd be better off waiting for a few hours to get started on our all nighter."

Ben smiles, mostly for himself, remembering how cute she had been arguing with him.

"We didn't study," Ben continues, running a finger down her cheek. "You fell asleep twenty minutes into the movie. You looked so peaceful and beautiful and I just… all I could think was about how all I wanted in life was to share it with you. Because I was in love with you."

Rey's expression is soft and a little bewildered as he continues. She turns her head slightly, her lips quickly pressing against his thumb.

"I've been in love with you this entire time. I'm sorry I was too scared to tell you. I was nervous… I am nervous that I'm going to ruin this. I love you and I know, Rey, I know that nothing is ever going to change that. I'm going to love you forever. I can feel it in my bones. Be with me? I know it's scary--"

Rey pulls at Ben's shirt until he bends down and she cuts off his sentence by kissing him. Ben sighs against her lips, his eyes closing as he places her free hand on her hips. She deepens the kiss, her tongue running across his, her fingers burying themselves in his hair.

The way Rey feels pressed against him, the pressure of her mouth on his, it's better than he could have imagined.

It's over too soon, Rey breaks the kiss, a large smile spreading across her face. Ben's grin is just as large and toothy. He stares at her for a second, trying to memorize the way she looks in that moment to his brain. Then he pulls her into his chest and kisses her hair.

"I love you too," Rey says after a moment. "And I agree that it is scary. But I want to be with you. It's worth it."

***

Ben's kisses are something Rey could get addicted to. He kisses with his whole body, the way he angles in his legs to brush against hers, the pressure of his thumb pressing into her hip, his fingernails lightly scratching down her spine. And his lips.

God his lips.

She had been right about his lips. They were absolutely made for kissing.

He left kisses all over her face, her cheek, her jaw, just above her eyebrow. Rey tugged at the bottom of his shirt with one hand, the other quickly moving to run along the exposed skin of his stomach.

He is so warm and solid underneath her hand.

Ben pulls away just long enough to pull his shirt off. Rey spends a few seconds taking in the sight of him shirtless, his eyes darker than she has ever seen them as he watches her watch him.

"You're so gorgeous," she says because she can. Then she moves to pull her own shirt off.

The black bra, which was mostly see through mesh, that she had picked out that morning appears to have been a good choice, judging by the way Ben swallows at the sight, his eyes slowly moving down her body.

He places one hand over her right breast, gently squeezing before taking her nipple and rolling it in between his fingers.

Rey moans, pushing herself forward into his hand, desperate for more friction. he repeats the actions on her left breast and Rey can't control the needy sounds falling from her lips.

Ben pulls away then, dropping his hands to her waist as he takes a step back to put distance between them.

Rey whines, instinctively following after him.

"The food is going to be cold if we don't stop," he explains, nodding at the pasta that's on the counter.

Rey shakes her head, lifting up on her toes to kiss him again.

"Ben," she says, her fingers digging into his shoulder as she tries to find her balance. "I don't give a fuck about the food."

***

Ben groans at Rey's words, helpless to pull away when she's saying things like that and smiling against his lips.

He kisses her, while moving them until her back is pressed against the wall. His fingers making quick work of the button on her jeans.

This is going too fast. He knows that he should stop, that they should eat and he should ask her to go on an actual date, or to be his girlfriend, or fuck, his wife, whatever she wants.

But he can't stop kissing her. And judging by the way she's trying to undo his belt, she doesn't want to stop either. It's hard to argue against the side of his brain begging him to give into the pleasure and to take her into his room when she's pushing his pants and boxers down just enough to run her fingers down his cock.

"Rey, look at me," he begs, his hand grips the corner of the wall as he fails to stop his hips from pushing forward. The way Rey's hands feel wrapped around him, moving at a slow and steady pace as she raises her eyes to his face. Her hand picks up speed, and her eyes slightly narrow in concentration, like she's trying to decipher every twitch of his face so she can make him do it again is too much.

"Yeah, Ben?" Rey says as an answer, her eyes not leaving his. She looks like the picture of innocence as she holds his gaze, her eyes full of love, her cheeks slightly pink, and her lips turned up in a smile.

It's difficult to believe that she can keep that expression on her face while giving him the best hand job of his life.

"We should, uh, we should talk," he manages to get out, his grip on the wall tightening. "About all of this and what it means. I don't want… we don't have to rush into anything. We have time."

Rey's hand stops moving and if Ben was capable of holding on to more than a few of his brain cells he would have been embarrassed at the way he kept moving his hips long after she stopped.

She holds his chin in her other hand, tilting his head down so she can look directly into his eyes before she leans up. The kiss is chaste and short, it leaves Ben wanting more.

"I don't want to talk," she says, moving her hand down his length again. "I don't want to wait either Ben," he shudders at the combination of her words and the way she twists her hand around the head of his penis. "I just want you."

***

Ben doesn't say anything, he tilts his head and looks at Rey like he's trying to decide what he did to deserve her and what he wants to do next. He's all action once he's made up his mind.

He places his hand on top of Rey's, and Rey pumps him faster, feeling emboldened by the feel of Ben's hands on hers. He moves her hand away off of him, pinning it above her head and against the wall.

"Ben," Rey sighs, half heartedly fighting against his hold, "I wasn't done--"

Rey stops talking while she watches Ben push down his pants to the floor. He picks her up and Rey wraps her arms around his neck, and her legs around his waist.

Heat pools in her stomach when he starts to walk them towards his room. His mouth is on her again. Ben's room is only about 30 steps away from the kitchen, but it seems to take forever before Ben finally makes it to his door.

Ben holds her against the door, carefully shifting her in his arms so that he can move one hand from her to open the door. Rey uses that as an opportunity to suck at the skin just below his jaw. The arm wrapped around her tightens and Rey can hear Ben's sharp intake of breath once she's moved her lips away.

So she does it again to the skin below his ear, just to see if she gets the same reaction from him.

Ben carefully sets her down on his bed. He settles his knees on either side of her and bends down to kiss her. His mouth is hot and desperate against hers as he unclasps her bra. Rey leans back on the bed and helps him slide the straps down her arms.

Rey lifts her hips up so Ben can remove her underwear and jeans. She runs her fingers along the edge of his hip bone.

"You're beautiful," Ben says, his voice lower than Rey has heard it before. He drags his thumb along the curve of her breast and across her nipple. "You're so beautiful Rey--" his fingers trail down along her waist and stomach until he barely grazes her clit with the pad of his finger.

But it's enough to send small tendrils of pleasure throughout her body. He moves lower, running a finger through the wetness at her opening. She nods at the questioning look he gives her.

He pushes a finger inside of her, curling it up as he sets a slow, leisurely pace with his movements. Rey moans, trying to urge him on to go faster.

"Ben, please," Rey begs, though she isn't quite sure what she's asking him to do. "I need more."

Ben drops to his knees, hooking Rey's legs over his shoulder. He adds another finger, picking up speed while he places wet kisses on her thighs and hip bone. His nose brushes against her clit when he moves his head to pay attention to the other side of her body.

Rey whines, lifting her hips to try to find something to give her friction where she needs it most. Ben grins into her thigh.

"You're a tease," Rey huffs. "An absolute damn tease and I need--"

"I know what you need," Ben whispers, his breath hot on her center and then he finally, finally lowers his mouth to her clit.

Rey's brain ceases to function when he sucks and pleasure washes over her body. She lifts her hips up and she's only slightly annoyed when Ben's hand pushes her back down to the bed.

Ben works her up easily. He isn't shy about trying different things, and the way he manages to work his tongue with his fingers and his mouth is magic.

Rey threads her fingers in his hair, she tugs on the strands as he brings her closer and closer to the edge.

"Ben," Rey whimpers, her back arching. She's fairly confident the grip she has on his hair is actually painful, but she can't bring herself to let go and Ben doesn't seem to mind. At least, it isn't stopping him from devouring her.

She doesn't want to come yet. She wants to stay in this moment forever. She needs it to last longer so she can commit the way her nerves are buzzing with pleasure and her heart is swelling with love and comfort to her memory.

Ben sucks harder. The hand on her stomach moves up and he is pinching her nipple and she comes.

He works her through her orgasm. His mouth and tongue slowing their movements against her clit until she swats at his head.

"Too sensitive," she mutters, her eyes still closed. He laughs against her skin, resting his chin just above her pubic bone.

Rey leans up, pressing her elbows into the mattress. "Hi," she says, grinning down at him.

"Hi." Ben sounds a little breathless, but he matches her smile and presses a kiss against her skin.

His hair is a mess and Rey's stomach swoops with the knowledge that she did that. She's the reason this gorgeous man was out of breath and his usually perfectly tousled hair was all out of place.

He moves up her body, running his tongue along her exposed skin until his head is hovering just over her own.

"I love you," he says. And if it were possible Rey knows that he would be able to see her heart beat out of her chest.

His face is so open and honest it surprises Rey. Because she knows that he said he loved her earlier, but there's still a part of her that isn't sure that he can mean it.

But then he looks at her with such adoration in his eyes and she's not sure how she could doubt him.

"I love you too," she says, beaming up at him as he closes the distance between them.

She can taste herself on his lips, but she isn't complaining as he opens his mouth to deepen the kiss.

"Condom?" she asks, breaking the kiss before placing smaller kisses along his jaw.

He nods, moving off of her and moving to the other edge of the bed. He opens the top drawer of his nightstand and pulls out a condom. Rey just watches as he tears open the wrapper, pinches the tip of the condom and rolls it down his length.

"Come here," he says and Rey rolls over and makes her way to Ben. She settles herself over him, resting her hands on his shoulders and sinks down on him.

Ben let's her set the pace, but he meets her thrust for thrust and it makes Rey clench against him. He feels so good inside of her, and then he uses his hands, dragging them down on her spine, across her chest, down her stomach until he reaches her clit and he presses down and Rey starts to see stars. Her movements above him stutter and she knows she isn't going to last long if he keeps that up.

"That's it," he says, "Are you going to come for me?" He puts more pressure on his finger, drawing small circles on her clit.

Rey sighs his name, squeezing her nails into his shoulder. He's taken over, controlling the speed of her thrusts as she just let's him, too lost in the pleasure pulsing through her veins.

"Ben," she groans when his mouth wraps around her nipple, his teeth sharp against her skin.

She comes when he bites down, her vision blurring. He keeps fucking into her chasing his own orgasm.

He comes silently, his breath hot on her neck. Rey catches her breath, enjoying the way Ben can't keep his hands still. He runs his hands over her collarbone, a finger trailing across her jawline, another down her spine.

She rolls off of him once she feels like she can take a full breath without immediately trying to suck in another. He moves around, removing the condom and tossing it into a trash can near his bed.

Rey is glad to discover that her head does fit into the crook of his neck just like she imagined. She tastes the salt on his skin when she leaves an opened mouth kiss to his shoulder. She wraps her arm around his chest and curls herself around him.

"So, you read the emails then?" Rey asks with a small laugh.

Ben kisses her head. "I read three of them, yeah."

"Just three?"

Ben sighs, his fingers continuing to run across her body as if he can't get enough of her skin. "I felt bad. Reading through emails you didn't send me, it felt like I was invading your privacy."

"I'm glad you did," Rey admits, pulling him closer to her. "Otherwise we might not be here."

Ben hums, his chest vibrating underneath her hand. "You have a point."

"Which ones did you read?"

"Um," Ben hesitates. Rey can feel his heartbeat pick up pace. "A recent one about me working out? And then the one on my birthday and the first one."

"Those were good ones," Rey laughs. "You could have read the other ones."

"You could send them to me." Ben drags his fingers through her hair. "I don't want you to hide from me anymore."

"Maybe I will," Rey teases. "Now that I know you might feel the same way about me."

"I do feel the same way," Ben amends her words. "I'm crazy about you. I've been crazy about you."

"But will you be tomorrow?" Rey asks, hating how needy her voice sounds to her own ears. "And the next day?"

"Always," Ben answers. There's no hesitancy to his answer.

"Always is a long time," Reys says, kissing his neck. "Don't make promises you can't keep."

"I never do," Ben promises. "I'm always going to love you."

"Me too," Rey says, her voice heavy with sleep. "I'm always going to love you."

"Maybe tomorrow we can read the rest of them together?" Ben asks.

"Yeah," Rey smiles. "We can do that."

#reylo #reylo fanfic #reylo fanfiction #reylo fic #reylo au #my fic

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