#Source: Helluva Boss
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Batman, dividing everyone up for patrol- Jason, you're with Steph, Damian, you're coming with me, Dick, you're with Cass. Tim, are you fine going solo?
Tim- Yup
Jason- Oh, come on! Why does he get to go solo?
Batman- Your brother gets to go solo because he doesn't have a kill count.
Jason- Oh, he SO does
Tim, whispering- It doesn't count if he doesn't find the bodies
#batman#tim drake#dick grayson#red robin#nightwing#jason todd#red hood#batfam#robin#damian wayne#source: helluva boss#cassandra cain#stephanie brown#spoiler#orphan
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Xie Lian, in the Spiritual Communication Array: So I appear to have been kidnapped by a calamity…
Mu Qing: Which one?
Feng Xin: How many calamities do you know??
Feng Xin: What does he look like, your highness.
Xie Lian: *Staring at Hua Cheng’s abs*
Xie Lian: Mmmm...sexy?
Mu Qing and Feng Xin: THATS CRIMSON RAIN!!!
#source: helluva boss#incorrect quotes#incorrect tgcf#tgcf#heaven official's blessing#Xie Lian#hua cheng#hualian#Mu Qing#Feng Xin#fengqing#xianle trio
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Heavy: *turning everything over in an attempt to find Archimedes* Дерьмо! Дерьмо! Дерьмо! *grabs Soldier by the throat* What the FUCK I supposed to tell Doktor?!
Spy: *cautiously attempting to loosen Heavy's fingers* Well, he seems to like you, Heavy. Maybe he would understand if you-
Heavy: *shaking his head gravely* My sex is good, but it is not that good, Spy.
Engineer: I don't think we have much of a choice, partner.
Heavy: DO YOU EXPECT HEAVY TO JUST CALL DOKTOR AND SAY-
*jumpcut to Heavy on the phone with Medic*
Heavy: *without stopping to take a breath* -so Soldier's raccoons have sneaked into building tiny bird's nest was taken and we have no way of finding him or his eggs love you bye!
Heavy: *quickly puts phone down as if it were red hot*
*beat*
Scout: Huh, that actually went better than I thought-
*KABOOM*
Medic: H E A V Y !
#source: helluva boss#tf2 archimedes#tf2 heavy#tf2 soldier#tf2 spy#tf2 engineer#tf2 scout#tf2 medic#team fortress 2#incorrect quotes#heavymedic#red oktoberfest
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I close my eyes
And I can see
A world that’s waiting up for me
That I call my own
Through the dark
Through the door
Through where no one’s been before
But it
Feels like
Home
~Million Dreams~
#hazbin hotel#source: hazbin hotel#hellvaboss#stolas#octavia#hazbin hotel charlie#hazbin hotel lucifer#helluva boss blitz#blitzø#vizziepop#luna hellva boss#hellva boss luna#father-daughter#charlie morningstar#hazbin hotel spoilers#source: helluva boss#fathers#million dreams#wholesome#sweet
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Situation: Hal, Oliver, Dinah, Roy, and Wally are on a mission when Wally runs off and they can't find him.
Hal: shit shit shit shit SHIT! Barry is gonna kill me. I'm dead.
Ollie: well, Flash seems to like you! Maybe if you just call him.and explain...
Hal: my dick is good but it is not THAT good Ollie.
#Halbarry#halbarry#barry allen#hal jordan#green lantern#the flash#Oliver Queen#Green Arrow#Roy Harper#Speedy#Wally West#Kid Flash#Dinah Lance#Black Canary#Halbarry Family#halbarry fam#source: Helluva Boss
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Mikey: That’s what she said.
Mona Lisa: What who said? What bitch is talking shit about me?
#incorrect tmnt quotes#source: helluva boss#tmnt 2012#tmnt#teenage mutant ninja turtles#michelangelo#mona lisa#swear warning
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Nie Huaisang: I can't just go with you. I'd be letting my brother down.
Wei Wuxian: Nie Mingjue can eat my ass!
Wei Wuxian: In a bad way!
Nie Huaisang: ...
Wei Wuxian: He's standing right behind me, isn't he?
Nie Huaisang: *nods*
#the untamed#grandmaster of demonic cultivation#mdzs#mo dao zu shi#incorrect quotes#incorrectmdzs#incorrect mdzs#wei wuxian#nie huaisang#source: helluva boss#inspired by helluva boss
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[ Izumi, Bumi, Kya, Tenzin, Lin and Suyin all sneak out with Appa under Sokka’s watch. ]
Azula: You have to tell their parents.
Sokka: What do you want me to do? Just call their parents all up and be like-
Sokka, calling the parents: Hey, guys, so your kids kinda stole Appa and flew off to who knows where. I have no way of getting any of them back. Okay? Okay. Good talk. Bye!
Sokka to Azula: That actually went better than I thought.
[ Toph breaks down the door. ]
All of them: SOKKA!
#incorrect quotes#source: helluva boss#izumi#bumi ii#kya ii#Tenzin#lin beifong#suyin beifong#azula#sokka#avatar the last airbender#katara#zuko#toph beifong#Aang
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Paul: Where's Ted?
Charlotte: He's busy-
Emma: being a fool
Paul: What kind of fool?
Emma: The 'everything is now on fire' kind
#source: helluva boss#incorrect quotes#starkid#incorrect starkid#hatchetfield#incorrect hatchetfield#hatchetverse#the guy who didn't like musicals#tgwdlm#incorrect tgwdlm#paul matthews#emma perkins#charlotte sweetly
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JOHN: 🎵 why, karkat, why do you hide your true feelings inside? 🎵
KARKAT: 🎵 I’M SCARED OF REJECTION… 🎵
JOHN: 🎵 why, karkat, why do you let terezi put it in your butt? 🎵
KARKAT: 🎵 IT GIVES ME AN EREC- 🎵 HEY
#submission#source: helluva boss#i regretfully say that helluva boss can be funny sometimes#homestuck#incorrect homestuck quotes#incorrect quotes#mod dave#john egbert#karkat vantas
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Uzi: Does immaturely insulting me make you feel better about your sad, single life?
J: It actually does.
#source: helluva boss#incorrect murder drones#incorrect quotes#murder drones#uzi doorman#serial designation j
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*Jinx Blows Up an Entire Wall to Enter a Room*
Ekko: Could’ve just used the door, dude. Doesn’t need to be this whole thing.
Jinx: I am eccentric and must therefore do eccentric shit. *waves her arms eccentrically*
#Timebomb#Jinx#Ekko#ekkojinx#Arcane#Incorrect Arcane Quotes#Incorrect Timebomb Quotes#Funny Arcane#Source: Helluva Boss
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Linguang Jun: Look who's acting like a big fucking hero? Careful what you say, little prince. Wouldn't want your little secret getting out, would we?
Mobei Jun: I don’t care anymore!!!
Shang Qinghua: My king?
Linguang Jun: Because if you let Shang Qinghua leave, I could tell everyone here that—
Mobei Jun: What, that I love him? Well, I DO!
The entire demon realm: I KNEW IT!!!
#source: helluva boss#incorrect quotes#incorrect scum villian#svsss#scum villian self saving system#scum villian#mobei Jun#shang qinghua#moshang#linguang jun
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Medic: *drunk giggling on the floor*
Heavy: Doktor?
Medic: *squealing joyfully* Heavy~y~y~y~y~y~y~
Heavy: *sighs and scoops Medic up* You drank too much, голубушка. Time for bed...
Medic: *hic* H-Hey, when did you get four heads? *reaches up* I wanna kiss them!
Heavy: *snickers as Medic tries to kiss him but misses*
#source: helluva boss#TF2 Medic#TF2 Heavy#team fortress 2#incorrect quotes#heavymedic#red oktoberfest#medic takes care of team heavy takes care of medic
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Lucifer: Quick! Ask me a question i normally wouldn't answer!
Angel: Does Lilith ever peg you?
Lucifer: Sometimes-
Charlie: Ew! Why that?!
Angel: Heh, knew it.
#source: helluva boss#incorrect hazbin hotel quotes#lucifer morningstar#hazbin lucifer#charlie morningstar#hazbin charlie#angel dust#hazbin angel dust#im rewatching helluva and thought this was a funny idea#its angels goal in this death to mess with charlie as much as possible and i refuse to beleive otherwise
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Would it frag up the moment if we make out right now?
Megatron, to Optimus Prime after dealing with some giant threat.
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