[image ID: a black pen sketch of Zack Sabre Jr wrestling Satoshi Kojima. Sabre is the focus of the composition, as he brings Kojima to a kneel with an armbar. the line of Sabre's body, from knee to head, forms a diagonal from the top-right to the bottom-left corners of the page. lines throughout the sketch are thin and loose. /.End ID]

this is why all the actions which produce suffering are particularly spectacular, like the gesture of a conjuror who holds out his cards clearly to the public.

Claudio for Kojima's Bread Club

AH FUCK THE NOOTS

Kojima is the only one who should have tweeting privileges

3 PKM Red Wallpaper -Creditos a los Autores Originales-

NOAH "THE NEW YEAR" 2024 Review (Jan 2nd, 2024, Ariake Arena, Tokyo)

1, GHC Jr. Heavyweight Tag Title 3-Way Elimination Match - Alpha Wolf & Dragon Bane (c) vs. Alejandro & Ninja Mack vs. YO-HEY & Tadasuke ***3/4

2, Jake Lee, Jack Morris & Anthony Greene vs. El Hijo del Dr. Wagner Jr., Titus Alexander & Vinnie Massaro **1/2

3, Masa Kitamiya vs. Tomohiro Ishii ****1/2+

4, Go Shiozaki vs. Satoshi Kojima ****

5, Great Sakuya & Nagisa Nozaki vs. Haruka Umesaki & Miyuki Takase **1/2

6, Takashi Sugiura vs. Ulka Sasaki ***

7, Hiroshi Tanahashi & HAYATA vs. Zack Sabre Jr. & Yoshinari Ogawa ***1/2

8, GHC Jr. Heavyweight Championship - Daga (c) vs. Eita ***

9, NOAH/NJPW vs. House of Torture 12 Man Elimination Match - Kaito Kiyomiya, Shota Umino, Daiki Inaba, Shuji Kondo, Ryohei Oiwa & Junta Miyawaki vs. EVIL, Ren Narita, SHO, Yoshinobu Kanemaru, Yujiro Takahashi & Dick Togo ***3/4

10, GHC Heavyweight Championship - Kenoh (c) vs. Manabu Soya ****1/2

11, Naomichi Marufuji vs. Kota Ibushi *

This was my first full NOAH show I've watched in forever and it was a great watch. They pulled in a great crowd of over 5K, it had very good matches up and down the card, two fantastic bouts, but unfortunately it ended with one of the worst matches you're likely to see all year...

Things started hot with the Jr. Tag Title 3-Way. You know what to expect here; lots of crazy spots, not much in the way of traditional "psychology", and 100mph action. The crowd loved this and it was a great way to kick things off. There was confusion over the elimination nature of this one, and had it ended after after the first fall, I think I'd have liked it more, but it was a great little opener with the GLG duo of YO-HEY and Tadasuke eliminating both opponents at 8:48 and 12:24 respectively to win the straps. Things cooled down a tad with the next match, which was decent enough but just your standard 6-Man, which saw the GLG were victorious again.

The next match was something of a Dream Match for me, one that's been teased for a good couple of years now as Ishii and Kitomiya, two of my favourite guys from their respective companies, had an absolute war that is a strong MOTYC only two days in! You know what to expect here, it was tsandard Ishii big match fair, which is always tremendous. They pounded each other with chops, Lariats, headbutts, forearms punches and suplexes for 15:04, before Ishii got the win with the Vertical Drop Brainbuster. Amazing. The next match too was excellent as Go Shiozaki went over ageless veteran Satoshi Kojima, in a battle of the Go-wan Lariats! This was great, and kept relatively short at 13:56. Shiozaki won after an exchange of Lariats. Go formed a new faction called Team NOAH in the post-match.

Next up we got a couple of interesting debuts. "The Great Muta's daughter" Great Sakuya (Riko Kawahata) debuted in a doubles clash which ended in a DQ after she blew the dreaded Dokukiri in poor Umesaki's face. This was very silly, and the crowd were dead for it, but whilst it certainly wasn't great, it certainly wasn't bad either. The next match was better as former MMA fighter Ulka Sasaki battled NOAH legend Takashi Sugiura in a nice little exhibition. Sasaki looked good here, and it featured some good sequences, before Sugiura naturally won at the 11 minute mark with the Olympic Yossen Slam.

After intermission we got the ZSJ/Ogawa vs. Tana/HAYATA tag match. This was really good, as you'd expect, though at nearly 18 minutes it was a little long. They teased a lot of stuff with Zack and Tanahashi for their TV Title match at the Dome tomorrow. Sabre Jr. won for his team when he submitted HAYATA with a crazy leg stretch. The GHC Jr. Title bout was decent enough, as Daga retained over Eita in exactly 13 minutes. I expected a bit more here, and it ultimatly came off as a bit of a squash as Daga dominated the whole thing, despite the crowd really wanting Eita to win. The 6 on 6 Elimationation match was actually a lot of fun and I really enjoyed it. Like everyone else, I'm at the end of my tether with this HoT stuff (and don't even get me started on Narita's inexplicably asinine inclusion in this nonsense), BUT, this match proves if done right, it can be pretty great. Obviously we got all the token House silliness like the never-ending stream of low blows, interference and incompetent refereeing, but it built really well as it boiled down to Kaito and EVIL, with Kiyomiya looking like a hero as he overcame the odds and sent EVIL to the floor with a Shining Wizard at the 26:14 mark to win for the babyfaces.

The first half of the Double Main Event; Kenoh's GHC Heavyweight Title defence against former tag partner Manabu Soya came next and it was another fantastic, hard-hitting war, and another early MOTYC. We all know Kenoh's great, and I've always been a fan of Soya since his All Japan days, but he's kind of lingered in the NOAH mid-card since arriving and gotten lost in the shuffle somewhat. Well this was a coming out party if ever there were one, both guys looked fantastic here, and I was worried someone was going to get legit KO'd at points, given how hard they were hitting each other. Kenoh missed a Moonsault knee drop by a considerable margin at the end there, but recovered well by devastating the big man with some headkicks and got the submission win at 28:36 with the Kenoh Special. Excellent, excellent match. Shiozaki came out in the post match and challenged Strong Fist to a title match, which will be happening on January 13th. Count me in as these two always have great matches together. And this is where I'd recommend everyone just turn this show off...

The Marufuji/Ibushi main event *sigh*... look I'm sure everyone already knows about this match, something that once upon a time was a dream match, but in the harsh realities of 2024, was an abject nightmare. This match was all kinds of bad, as Ibushi came into this thing banged up to oblivion and physically incapable of doing... anything, really. AND IT WENT 33:26!!! Which honestly felt like a good couple of hours watching live. Ibushi announced he was working through a broken hand and foot in the days prior, and when he made his entrance with tears streaming down his face, I feared the worst. The reality is this match shouldn't have happened, or if it did, have it go like 10 minutes maximum or something. And certainly don't have it be the main event! It was total insanity to book this to go north of 30 minutes. But even then, nobody made Ibushi try to do his signature spots in this thing. The guy couldn't even get himself up to go over the ropes on a backdrop, so what made him think attempting a Moonsault to the floor was a wise move? Well, he seemingly broke his ankle doing so, and the match only descended into more of a train wreck from there. The crowd were dead, almost like they were at a funeral, the "action" was a level lower than snail pace, and watching it was a profoundly sad experience. I never thought I'd see the day when the Keiji Muto of 2023 looked more mobile and having more business being in the ring than Kota Ibushi ever. Ibushi won with Kamigoye to put everyone out of their misery, none more so than the two guys in the match, then there was a totally bizarre post match where Kiyomiya and Jake Lee came out and seemingly banished Ibushi from NOAH. Ibushi could barely stand or walk on his way to the back, and this is a match I'll never watch again in my life. I had thought about giving this a DUD, but I couldn't be that harsh given the circumstances. Also, Marufuji did try his best out there, bless him. But the fact is Ibushi needs some time away from the ring to heal. I mean, this could be the end of his illustrious in-ring career, which is beyond heartbreaking, and he's looked a shadow of his former self since he returned to wrestling last Spring, but he wasn't even the same person out there on this show.

All in all, this was a great supershow from NOAH, marred slightly by a catastrophically bad main event, for obvious reasons. But I recommend everyone check it out up the fab Kenoh/Soya match, and just pretend the Ibushi/Maru match never happened.

NDT

Can't believe Finn Balor broke Kojima's heart

Billie Starkz & Athena team up with Satoshi Kojima & Keith Lee • AEW WrestleDream – photos by Scott Lesh