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#MEN ARE NOT THE PRIZE!!! NOBODY SHOULD BE THE PRIZE TO WIN AT THE EXPENSE OF YOUR WELLNESS AND THE WELLNESS OF PPL AROUND YOU
glassbangtan · 5 years
Text
pick pocketing the crown jewels {Park Jimin x Reader}
Words: 10.5k
Summary: You break the law every single day just to stay alive. Somehow, Jimin - the prince - sees potential in this little personality trait of yours.
Genre: angst - prince!au 
Warnings: lil bit of blood
Notes: masterlist - buy me a coffee! 
---
It never failed to amuse you how easily the nobles were tricked.
   Nobles weren't intelligent. They had money, had power, and that was all they cared about. They took little to no care in their own education, because when you had it all handed to you, what was the point? They didn't need qualifications to get where they wanted to be – they stepped into it with ease.
   It was people like you that were intelligent, because you had to be. Give you a maths problem and you would struggle through it, but you knew things much more useful than that. Give you a coin purse, hidden deep within the pockets of a higher up, and it would be in your hands in seconds with nobody any the wiser.
   That was where your skill sets came in, how you survived. You knew people. You knew how they worked, how they thought, what their goals were even if you'd never spoken to them in your life. You would spot a noblemen walking through the streets with his head down and his collar up and you would trail after him until the coast was clear; then you'd sidle up to the side of him, your own head down and your fingers sneaky. Whatever goods he had on his person at the time would be in your hand in seconds.
    You followed the royal carriage this morning, your hood pulled on over your head. The festival was beginning in a few minutes, and the royal family were not keen on being tardy; that would make a bad impression. Despite the years upon years of the Park family being on the throne, they still thought it necessary to make an effort in pleasing the people who clearly adored them.
    You were not one of those people.
   They were just another set of rich people in your eyes, a few more pockets to loot, a bit more coin to pinch. This festival would be the perfect time to get your fingers around a prize – the crowd would be massive, and you would sink in much quicker than you would on any normal day.
    You walked through the gates of the festival and waited for the carriage to pull up. The crowd cheered in excitement, the sight of their beloved royal family sparking a great amount of joy within the citizens. You stood in the corner, eyeing the carriage as it rolled to a stop. Your fingers itched with the need to reach out and snatch the crystals off the side of it – what a waste of fine jewels. They had all this at their disposal, and they chose to pin it to a moving death trap.
   Some people deserved the fate you offered them.
   The king and queen stepped out of the carriage first, as they always did; try as they might to deny it, they were not the main stars of the show. They left Jimin in the cart, saving the best till last, because they weren't entirely stupid. The reaction their son got compared to the reaction they got spoke volumes.
   The two royals waved, grinning from ear to ear before they started shaking hands and greeting their loyal subjects. You had half a mind to step forward and offer your own hand in greeting, just for a little bit of risk; it was always such a thrill speaking to the person you were about to rob blind. It made the job that much more exciting.
   Jimin was next. You watched with baited breath as the carriage door was pulled open and the prince stepped out, regal as ever in his dark green suit, black hair slicked back and styled to perfection. His plump lips were set in a manufactured smile, his wave orchestrated. The crowd went wild. They really could not see just how uncomfortable he was; maybe it was because you'd spent the majority of your life analysing people, picking up on the little tells everyone else ignored. Maybe that was the reason you could tell just how badly Jimin wanted to duck back into his carriage and leave.
    He started greeting his subjects, and you set off.
   You wanted this to be quick, needed to get to them before the crowd really did swallow them up. It was always more difficult aiming for a moving target, so you needed to get there before they started investigating the stalls lined up along the street.
   You pushed through the crowd, shouldering people out the way before you were finally by Jimin's side. He smelled of flowers. It made you scowl.
    He was distracted when you reached your hand into his pocket and tugged.
  On nothingness.
    Okay. This was fine. You could come back from this – everything was fine. Time was quickly dwindling, but Jimin was still distracted and the crowd didn't seem bothered by your presence; you were going to be okay.
   You slipped your hand from his blazer and tried his other pocket. You tugged on the fabric.
   Empty.
   Jimin stiffened at the side of you. You were quick to slip your hand away, drop it back to your side and start down the street before he could pinpoint who it was feeling inside his clothes – you cursed yourself the entire way to the nearest alley, where you slumped against the wall and yelled into your palms.
   Fuck it. Fuck everything!
   You had such high hopes coming into this. You were so confident, to the point where you hadn't even bothered saving up for food for the next week. You thought you would be coming home with one of your biggest wins yet, but now you sat in an alleyway, hoping and praying that Jimin hadn't noticed your presence beside him.
     It had been a risk from the very beginning, and you'd known that. But you were meant to be good at this. Royals weren't meant to be dumb, completely oblivious to what was happening around them; so how had you failed this time?
   You slumped down against the wall, nuzzling into the shadows in any attempt to hide from the chattering passers-by. The festival was in full swing now, but you had no interest in the goods they were selling. You would be stupid to stay around these parts for much longer, but you had nowhere to go without turning back and going the way you came – and then you'd have to face Jimin all over again. If he'd seen your face...
   You stayed in the alleyway for a few more minutes, pondering over what to do. No option was good. You'd ruined it, risked it all and lost the prize at the end of the day. You would have to pay the consequences.
    It was the sound of feet echoing against the wall that startled you out of your cloud of self-pity. You looked up, reaching round to your belt where the silver knife was hidden beneath your cloak. Your fingers trembled. Your mind sped up, feet scraping against the concrete as you slowly rose to stand, making sure to stay close to the shadows in fear of peering eyes.
    He rounded the corner.
   It was in one fluid motion. He was panting as if he'd ran a mile, but as soon as he turned the corner into the alleyway, he slammed his back against the wall, flicked his head towards you and said, “Please don't make any noise.”
   “Prince Jimin?”
  You cursed yourself. You should have kept quiet.
  He nodded, though his attention didn't seem to be on you at the minute. He peeked his head round the side of the wall and grumbled.
  You tightened your grip on your knife. “Who are you hiding from?”
   “My guards.”
  You frowned. “Your guards?”
  He waved a dismissive hand in your direction, silencing you instantly. He had a cute face, soft features and a grin that could win anyone over, but he was still a royal. He had some kind of power with making people shut up.
  You watched him bounce anxiously from foot to foot. Before long, he let out a long breath and slumped against the wall, pressing a hand to his collarbone. His eyes fluttered closed, long lashes brushing against his slightly rounded cheeks.
  You tilted your head to the side. “All better?”
  He creaked open an eye and glanced at you. “Much better, thank you.”
   “What are you doing here, Prince Jimin? Isn't this festival being held in your families honour?”
  “None of us asked for it. Especially not me.” He straightened up, fixing his dark green blazer, running a hand through his hair. You nearly rolled your eyes; there you were, standing in a robe and some old riding gear that you'd stolen off a corpse one day, and he was fussing over getting his expensive silk blazer dirty.
  He turned to you and bowed. The action startled you. “I'm glad I was able to find you again.”
  You blinked. “What?”
   “You ran off before I could say anything to you.” He shrugged. “Not like I blame you, to be quite honest. I would also run if my target caught me trying to pick his pockets.”
   Your heart plummeted; so you had been caught.
  A smile rose on the prince's face. “You know, I'm surprised at your brashness. You went in for a second look after coming up empty the first time.”
   “I don't like to give up too easily, Your Highness.”
   Jimin hummed, folding his arms over his chest. He was regarding you with a raised brow, that god forsaken smirk still prominent on his face; you wanted to slap it off him, wanted to get your knife out and scare him until he realised that you were not the right person to be teasing.
  But you didn't move.
  “You could have just called the guards on me, you know,” you said. “We could have avoided this little meeting if you didn't have such an independent streak built into you.”
    “I don't want you arrested,” he replied.
  You raised a brow. “No?”
    “No.” He grew awkward then, glancing over his shoulder once more before taking a single step towards you.
  You pulled your knife from your belt. Jimin faltered, but he did not run as you expected him to. He simply held up a hand, a timid little sign of surrender, and stepped towards you again.
  “I've seen you fighting,” he said. “I've watched you on the streets, heard all about you.”
  “Then you'll know how many men I've killed.”
   “Oh, I know. I know everything.” He glanced at the knife. “I want you to teach me.”
    For a second, you were certain you had misheard. That was the only logical thing you could think of, because there was surely no way in hell Prince Park Jimin was approaching you, in the middle of a dark alleyway, to ask for your assistance in combat.
   Jimin awkwardly smiled at your silence, looking down at the floor. “I can explain-”
  You jumped towards him, grabbed the lapels of his blazer and tugged him forward. He cried out, but the sound was muffled by your other hand slamming against his mouth; you felt his lip split beneath your palm, felt the blood trickle down your wrist and drip onto the floor.
  “How many guards have you got on them rooftops, Your Highness?” you hissed in his ear. “Call them off or I'll do more than bust your lip open.”
  He groaned against your palm. Your hand fell to the side, though you kept his lapels tangled in your fingers.
    “There are no guards,” he said. “God, you have some grip on you-”
You shoved him away. He stumbled, falling on his backside. “Shut up. You're trying to waste my time.”
  “I'm asking for a favour. You could have easily said no if it's not something you're interested in, though I suggest you wait to hear the rewards before you make your decision.”
   You narrowed your eyes; he looked serious. There was not a single spark of amusement in his tone, and he still wasn't running away. Your threats had been clear, laid out for him to decide what he wanted to do to avoid them, and yet he remained in your presence.
  You watched as he stood up and dusted off his clothes, grunting at the scrapes now indented into his hands. Part of you had the gall to feel bad; you quickly banished that part to the sidelines, continuing to stare at him with narrowed eyes.
  He caught your gaze and sighed exasperatedly. “I'll get you a room in one of the finest inn's in the city. I will pay you for your services. I will even smuggle out the weaponry you want to use – anything of your choosing. This isn't just a one-sided deal.”
  “And the king and queen are okay with this? They think it's a mighty fine idea for their son to just throw himself at the nearest thug for combat training?”
  Jimin's small smile fell, revealing the truth.
  Your eyes widened. “They don't know?”
  “They would never agree to it,” he said.
  “I can't say I blame them.”
  “They've hired a swordsmen from the northern dominances, but he's not good enough. He goes easy on me, and I'm learning nothing.” Jimin's eyes met yours. “I need someone who knows what they're doing, who isn't afraid to give their prince a few bruises.”
  “So you went out looking for me?”
  Jimin shrugged. “I was hoping to find you at some point. It was only luck that you came to me first.”
  You scowled, tucking your knife back into your belt. “If your parents find out about this, I'll be executed. You know that, don't you?”
  “They won't find out,” he said. “I have this planned out very nicely. You're going to be fine.”
  It wasn't a promise. He could smile and use his charm, but you knew the words were not a promise because you knew how the law worked; he would have no say in whatever decision his parents made when it came to the life of a convict. If they ended up finding out the truth, you would be dead within the fortnight, and Jimin would be able to do absolutely nothing to stop it.
    But the riches. The room. The weaponry; those had been promises he could keep, and things you craved most ravenously. You looked him in the eyes, tracing the gorgeous chestnut brown of his irises, and he stared right back at you.
  He looked determined.
   He looked ready.
   He looked serious. This was not going to be a joke to him.
  You inhaled steadily, shaking your head. “Whatever makes you happy, Your Highness.”
  ---
  Jimin arrived at the door of the inn a few days later, requesting you by name.
  You leaned against the door frame of your brand new room – a room Jimin was secretly paying for – and watched the prince as he tugged on the tight fitting black shirt you'd given him. He had arrived at the inn wearing some floral patterned blazer, shoes that were not scuffed and trousers that looked freshly ironed; you'd laughed in his face before dragging him upstairs and demanding he change into something a little more appropriate.
  “Has this ever been washed?” he asked.
  “Definitely not by me.”
  Jimin shivered and turned back to you. He nodded towards the swords he brought; made of iron, shining even in the dull yellow light of the inn. “Shall we start?”
  “I want to see how you hold a sword first,” you replied, grabbing one of the swords and tossing it at him. He flinched, and the weapon dropped to the floor.
  Jimin smiled sheepishly.
  You rolled your eyes, kicked it up and caught it. You passed it to him, making sure to bow dramatically before stepping away from him.
  “I've got this, you know,” he said. “I know how to at least hold a sword.”
  You waved a hand, gesturing for him to stop talking and show you.
  He did so, and you had to admit that the stance was pretty well formed. His back was straight, his shoulders pulled away from his ears, his chest out, his feet apart; he looked like he had potential. However, his hand trembled a little bit, the weight of the weapon clearly something he would have to get used to.
  You nodded, circling him critically. “Very nice, Jimin. Very nice indeed.”
  “Yeah?”
  “You're not entirely a lost cause.”
  “Oh good.” He broke free of the stance, turned to look at you. “So can we start?”
  “You're very eager to go against your parents, aren't you?”
  “I'm eager to learn,” he corrected. “How am I meant to be king one day if I can't even lead my men into battle?”
  “Your father doesn't go into battle. He leaves that to the soldiers.”
   Jimin shrugged. “I don't want to be like that.”
   You left it there; already the conversation was sinking into territory you did not want to touch on. And so, you grabbed your own sword and led Jimin into the back courtyard of the inn. The grass would make dodging a little bit more difficult, but would soften any falls Jimin may take during his time of getting used to the weight of his sword.
   You started out slow, showing him the basic manoeuvrers and dodging tactics that you had learned when you were nothing more than a beginner; you were much smaller than Jimin when you were just starting out, but that didn't seem to matter.
  You were surprised to see how lithe he was on his feet, moving from one step to the other with the gracefulness similar to that of a cat getting ready to launch itself at prey. He was grinning the entire time, giddy with adrenaline.
  “Calm down,” you said when he stepped towards you and took a swing. It clashed off your sword easily, but he still seemed proud of himself when he hopped back.
  “This is so much fun,” he said.
  “It's not meant to be fun. You'll be using these moves to kill people.”
   His smile faded. He awkwardly coughed and nodded. “Right. You're right.”
  “I am. Which is why you should listen to me.” You pointed to a spot in the grass. “Stand there and turn around.”
   He frowned, but did as you said. With his back to you, it would be easy enough to just spark him through the throat, steal his goods and flee; the pick pocket in you thought that was a most reasonable idea. However, Jimin had proven himself to be serious about this whole thing, and you found yourself wanting to teach him, wanting to help him become the best he could be.
  It was sickening, but you decided not to question it.
  “What are you going to do?” he asked.
  “We're gonna work on your awareness,” you replied. “I'm going to sneak up behind you, and you have to turn around before I touch you – the closer I am without touching you, the more points you get.”
  Jimin shifted from one foot to the other. “Alright.”
  You started towards him, making sure to step on the odd branch here and there, just to give him the tiniest bit of help. He stiffened, messing with the hilt of his sword, counting under his breath-
  Your hand shot out. Jimin span round, snatching at your wrist just seconds before you could slap him across the head.
    You grinned, nodding. “Good! A bit too close, but you did well!”
   Jimin smiled back. “You're very light on your feet. Who taught you that?”
  You pulled back, tucking your hand into your pockets. “Nobody. A life time on the streets just does it naturally.”
   Jimin's smile faded; you pretended not to notice, instead turning on your heel and making your way back to the sword you'd discarded in the grass. “You did a good job today, Your Highness. We can pick up where we left off tomorrow.” You glanced over your shoulder. “Make sure to get plenty of sleep, and rest that wrist up. It'll get easier with time, but you can't put too much strain on it this early on in training.”
  ----
   Jimin's heart thundered.
  This was bad. Very bad.
  He wasn't meant to get this involved. A few lessons, something to help him land on his feet – that was all he'd been asking for in the beginning. He was a prince, soon to be the king. All he wanted was a bit of experience so as to not seem like such a let down to the people who already saw him as nothing more than a cute face and someone to dote over.
  Searching for you seemed like the best option, and he would not deny that you had the experience he was looking for; a few years locked in some training grounds was nothing in comparison to a lifetime on the streets, and you were a direct example of this. He'd taken one look at you, your hand slipping from his pocket, and he knew that the rumours he'd heard were spoken with truth.
  You really were dangerous.
  But there was a different side to you that Jimin hated to ponder on, because it was this very side of you that was making him question everything. You weren't meant to smile that like. You weren't meant to compliment him. You weren't meant to be so optimistic about his training.
  You weren't supposed to be the only one in his life who believed he could do this.
  He grumbled, ducking his head into his hands. He sat shirtless by the edge of his bath, it having been filled with soap suds and warm water by the servants only a few minutes prior; he'd requested it himself, needing to soak away the urge to just turn on his heel and go back to the inn he'd had you set up in. You were like a damn magnet. Your personality was just. . . appealing.
  He dipped his hands in the water and rubbed his palms into his cheeks. His wrist ached with the movement. It was a good pain, though – it showed progress.
  “Jimin?”
   The voice of his mother pierced the moment. He stood up, very nearly knocking over the stool he'd been sat on. He quickly caught it, turned towards the door moments before it creaked open and the queen was stood before him.
  Her eyes narrowed. “Are you going to bathe or not?”
  “Sorry,” he said, the word being more routine than anything else. “I was just – uh-”
  “Is that a bruise on your ribcage?”
  The queen reached forward. Jimin lurched away from her fingertips, pressing a hand over the spot he knew she was looking at; it was just below his chest, wrapping round his torso. You'd hit him a little bit harder than anticipated, had apologised for it. Jimin told you it was fine, because in the moment, it really was. It was an experience, something he would have to get used to if he wanted to be a successful leader one day.
  But now his mother was staring at it, brown eyes wide with horror.
  “Who did this to you, Jimin?” she asked.
  “Nobody,” he replied. “Mother, nobody did anything to me. I just hit it off the side of my wardrobe this morning. That's all.”
   Her mouth twitched into a frown. “That's a very big bruise for something so simple.”
  “It was a big collision.” Jimin ran his hands through his hair, tousled and soaked in sweat. “Are you planning on staying long? I need to get washed up before bed.”
  The queen clearly did not believe him; Jimin didn't blame her. He'd never been a very good liar, but the idea of throwing you into trouble was enough to make him at least try.
  She inhaled deeply, flicked her gaze to his damaged ribs once more before she turned on her heel and fled the bathroom. Jimin closed the door, locked it tight and slumped back down on the stool. He watched the water shift back and forth in the tub, fingers idly stroking along it's surface. He thought of you, that grin that won him over from the very moment he laid eyes upon it – and he cursed himself.
  You were too much of a risk.
  But he wasn't sure if that was a bad thing any more.
  ---
  “Risk is good.”
   You tapped his side with your wooden sword. Jimin frowned, watching you.
  You jumped from one foot to the other and bounded backwards, spreading your arms out. “You have to take the risk to get the prize, Jimin. That's the first rule of pick pocketing.”
   “I'm not here to learn how to pick people's pockets.”
  You waved a dismissive hand. “Same rules apply. If you're afraid of hurting me, then we're gonna get nowhere.” You raised a brow. “How's that ribcage of yours doing, by the way?”
  “It's healing up well.” Jimin ran an idle hand along the area in question, wincing at the tenderness. You paused, analysing the expression on his face.
  “You sure about that?”
  “It's fine,” he insisted, raising his sword. “It's also not the reason I'm here.”
  “Right. You wanna get big and strong. I forgot.”
  “Don't say it like that. You make me sound like a child.”
  “You're acting like a child – strike first, Your Highness, or I'll take your kneecaps.”
  Jimin grinned, finally taking the initiative to step forward and swing.
  The two of you had been meeting up for a number of weeks now, hidden beneath the cover of trees and back alleys. Already Jimin was getting better, despite his hesitance when it came to making the first move. His body was beginning to harden, and slowly, you started letting yourself strike at him a little more harshly, a little more suddenly – more bruises for him to cover, but more experience for him to learn from.
  He called it a dance. The twisting of bodies, clashing of swords, the feather light steps you always made him do – he thought it was some kind of jig. He would laugh as he did it, and at the end of the day, he would shake your hand and say, “Good dancing today,” and you would roll your eyes and tell him to grow up.
  But in truth, you liked that term. It was a lot better than battle, which was all this was really for. No amount of friendly pseudonym's would change what this really was.
  Jimin managed to smack you on the shoulder. His eyes widened when the sword made contact, and you humoured him by dropping your own weapon and falling to your knees, gripping the struck area.
  Jimin rushed to your side. “Shit, did that actually hurt? I was trying to be gentle-”
  You whirled up, pushing him away. “Aha! So you admit it!”
   Eyes wide, he held his hands up in surrender. “What are you on about? Are you hurt?”
  “Of course I'm not hurt,” you spat, waving your arm as proof. “I told you not to go easy on me, Park. We're three weeks in and you're still scared to actually hit someone.”
  Jimin frowned, dropping his hands to his side. “I'm not scared of hitting people.”
  “You had me fooled.”
  “Look, is it such a bad thing that I don't want to hurt people?”
  “When you're gearing up for battle, yes.” You sighed. “You're too soft, Jimin. How do you expect to go to war and win if you're scared of hurting your opponent?”
  “I'm not scared of hurting my opponent,” he grumbled. “I'm scared of hurting you.”
  You paused, tilting your head to the side.
  Jimin looked up, noticed your confused expression and immediately his own eyes widened. He stumbled over his words, trying to correct himself before you got the wrong idea.
  “Because you're tough! You've done this kind of thing before, you know? I haven't. I don't want to – like – make you angry and then-”
   You raised a hand, silencing him. He snapped his mouth shut, making you feel oddly powerful; here he was, prince of the entire dominance, and yet he quietened at the raise of your hand.
  What an odd turn of events.
  “I understand,” you said. “But that isn't something you need to worry about. I'm made of tougher stuff than you seem to think.”
  “I suppose.”
  You spread your arms out. “So go. Hit me. Take a swing. Prove to me that my time hasn't been wasted these past three weeks.”
  And so, the real training began.
  Jimin was still hesitant. You could feel the pull of his sword when it whacked against your body, the way he didn't put all of his strength into it. Still, his dodging was getting a lot better, and his forever graceful footsteps were helping him out a lot when it came to getting around you. His improvements were coming along nicely, and throughout the training session, you couldn't help but smile.
  Never before had you imagined yourself in this situation. Prince Park Jimin, coming to you for help. For years, you'd chastised him and his family for having it all whilst you and people like you were forced to rot and beg on the streets of the very country they were supposed to help see thrive. A part of you still held that hatred, though it faded at a worrying pace with the time you were spending with the prince; he wasn't all that bad.
  In fact, he wasn't anything like how you'd imagined. Not at all.
  The end of the day rolled around much sooner than you anticipated. You'd gotten lost in the work again, though as soon as Jimin collapsed to the floor in a heap of sweat and heavy breaths, you followed close behind him. The two of you sat kneeled upon the grassy floor, trying to catch your breath, smiling at one another even though there really was nothing to smile about.
  You just liked seeing his eyes crinkle like that.
  “You did good today,” you panted. “Better than ever, in fact.”
  “Just because I hit you?”
  “Because you took a risk.” You sighed, pulling your feet from beneath you. “I think we can bring the iron swords back into training tomorrow. What do you say?”
  Jimin raised a brow. “Isn't that a little dangerous?”
  “Combat usually tends to be quite dangerous.”
  “I don't want to actually hurt you, Y/N.” His voice softened. “If you want to stop the training sessions, you can. You've taught me enough.”
  You blinked. There the offer was – your chance at freedom. You could take your coin and leave, never look back. Isn't that what you'd always wanted? A chance to do whatever it was you wanted, a chance to get away from the country that broke you down in so many different ways?
  You looked to the floor. “A few more sessions should have you up to par. I can stick around for a little while longer, I think.”
  ----
  Oh, this wasn't good. Not good at all.
  Not even the rooftops were providing you the escapism you so desperately craved right now. The wind through your hair, billowing your hood out behind you – it was usually as easy as that. You got lost in the risk of balancing on the edge of a building, of looking down at the people you were intent on robbing. It was an easy way out of your own head.
  But it wasn't enough.
  Jimin's face kept pushing to the forefront of your mind, leaving you breathless each and every time; his black hair, his smile, the way his eyes shifted into crescents when you told a particularly awful joke that he just found so funny because it was unlike anything he'd heard before – he was distracting you, and he wasn't even here.
  You weren't stupid, of course. You knew what was happening. Three weeks of training a man to fight was bound to lead to some kind of bonding between you, but this was the prince you were talking about. This wasn't just a bad idea – it was downright forbidden. It was putting your life at risk.
  You should have just taken his offer to end things then and there. You could have gotten out of this mess in a number of seconds, turned round and dealt with your feelings. It would have hurt, saying goodbye, but it would have sorted out the issues you were currently trying to juggle.
  Why had you said no?
  You wanted to see him again. You wanted to see him every day. You wanted to continue your conversations and laugh with him, tease him about the littlest of things because he always found that so amusing. Everybody else treated him like glass, and yet here you were, giving him a rough time because he's a few heads shorter than the prince of the southern dominance. He was easy to be around. He was a real person, and that was the biggest shock of all.
  You closed your eyes and inhaled the smokey air. In the distance, the palace stood tall. On the street, nobles walked around with their heads held high and those cocky smiles on their faces that told you they truly believed they were untouchable.
  Well, you needed something to distract you anyway. You may as well.
  You leaped off the edge of the roof, landing in a crouch against the cobblestones. A few ladies yelped at the sudden intrusion, but you ignored them and darted up the street, tugging your hood a little tighter round your head as you did so. Your knife was heavy beneath your cloak; you hadn't needed to use it for quite some time now, considering you hadn't needed to pick pocket anyone. You'd been sleeping easy, thanks to Jimin and his kind donations.
  You didn't like stealing just for the sake of it, but you deserved the treat now.
  You pinpointed a man within seconds; he was walking with easy steps, winking at a passing carriage-driver who swooned beneath his attention. You scoffed under your breath, shifting through the crowd until you were behind him. He waved and hollered at a boatman, saying something like, “And how is that wine I sent you?” but he kept walking before the man could even respond.
  Ignorant bastard.
  Again, sometimes you really were convinced that some people just deserved the fate you offered them.
  After growing tired of watching him shamelessly flirt with everyone, you picked up your pace and sidled up beside him. Keeping your head down was usually your go-to tactic, but this was a chatty man. He noticed you, his face immediately brightening at the idea of a new friend. He turned, tilted his head forward until he was meeting your eyes; you forced a smile on your face.
  “Good evening, sir,” you said, offering a bow.
  He bowed back. “Evening. What an odd choice of dress.”
  “Oh, this?” You plucked at the dirty material of your cloak. “It's old, sir. I've been meaning to get a new one, but time is scarce, and money even scarcer. I'm sure you understand.”
  He chuckled, throwing his head back as if you'd said some unbelievably funny joke. You laughed along with him, just because that was etiquette.
  “I can't say I do,” he replied. “Well, I hope it keeps you warm. These upcoming winters are meant to be dangerous.”
   “Oh, I'll keep that in mind, sir.” You stumbled – or so he believed – and clashed your shoulder against his. He gasped at the contact, flinching back; it was perfect. His flinch was enough to wrench your hand out of his pocket, his coin purse tucked nicely in your palm.
  You quickly hid it beneath your cloak, pretending to be flustered.
  “Goodness, I apologise, sir,” you said. “I've been a little weak on my feet lately. Please, do excuse me. I must get going before-”
   His hand snapped out and wrapped round your throat. “Guards!”
  Your eyes widened – shit. Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit. This wasn't right. There was no way in hell he'd managed to notice you.
  You gasped, his fingers pressing into your throat until your knees really were growing weak beneath you. His eyes were alight with anger, and you watched it morph into privileged amusement as the night guards came sprinting towards you.
  “What's the problem here, sir?” one of them asked.
  “This one was just caught picking my pocket,” the noblemen replied, shoving you to your knees. The cobblestones ripped the fabric of your trousers, but you were too dreary to care. You swallowed lungfuls of air, trying desperately to remain conscious even as the ghost of his fingers continued to drain what little energy you'd managed to store.
  The guards grabbed you. “We've been looking for you.”
  “Fuck you,” you spat. One of the guards back handed you; his ring slashed your cheek, cutting a clean little slice in the flesh.
  “Take them away.”
  You didn't put up a fight. You couldn't. Your vision was going blurry. Your own blood was dribbling from the cut in your cheek into your mouth, forcing you to taste your own defeat until the darkness showed you mercy and you finally collapsed into the guards hostile embrace.
  ----
  Jimin heard the guards enter through the palace gates. One peek over his novel, and his world tilted.
  He stood up, very nearly taking the table with him in his haste to get to his feet. The novel fell from his lap, but he left it there as he marched towards the guards.
  “What is going on here?” he demanded. He couldn't properly see your face through the hood of your cloak, but he knew it was you; he would recognise those clothes anywhere.
  “Your Majesty, this is the pick pocket we've been looking for,” one of the guards replied, and Jimin had to bite his tongue. He sounded so pleased with himself.
  “We've been looking for a pick pocket?” Jimin pondered. “Let me see them.”
  The guards frowned, but they would be fools to go against the princes orders. They lifted you up a little higher until your head was falling back, your hood going with it, allowing Jimin to see the mess they'd made of your face.
  Blood. It was everywhere, pooling from a relatively deep gash in your face. Your knees were scraped, trousers ripped. There were bruises on your throat.
  “Did you try and kill them?”
  “Your Majesty-”
  Jimin didn't let the man finish. He grabbed your arms and pulled you into his grip, using the strength you'd helped him build to drag you into his side. He cupped your face, tilting your head forward to stop the blood on your cheek from dribbling into your eyes.
  “You won't tell my parents about this,” he growled, keeping his eyes on you. “Do you understand?”
  The guards shuffled awkwardly. “Your Majesty, this person is a criminal-”
  “I didn't deny that,” Jimin snapped. “But I swear on my crown and my title as prince of this country, that if you go against my orders, it'll be you with the bruises on your throat. Now, answer me clearly – do you understand?”
  The guards nodded, and for the first time in his entire life, Jimin didn't feel like the goofy prince everyone tried to make him out to be. He felt powerful, in charge – just how it should be. How it was always meant to be.
  He nodded stiffly before he scooped you up in his arms and started back towards his chambers. His parents were on a trip visiting some of the hostels in the area – he would have most of the day to clean you up and figure out what to do with you.
  He kicked open his bedroom door and set you down on his bed. Immediately, blood stained the sheets, dripping down the side of your face, but Jimin didn't care. It only worried him, forcing a whimper of panic to push to the surface that he tried so desperately to bite down – with no luck.
  You didn't look right. You didn't look right.
  He ran his hands through his black hair. He was going to cry. He could feel the tears pushing to the surface, and it took all of this strengths to swallow them down so he could get his head on straight – he knew what to do. He'd been taught this kind of thing, had attended classes to help him get better, but god the idea of pushing a needle through your face, of making your pain double – it hurt. It hurt so badly, and Jimin knew why but he didn't want to admit it.
  Right now, he couldn't even concentrate on that kind of thing.
  He inhaled shakily and reached beneath his bed for the emergency First Aid kit his parents insisted he keep in his room lest there be an emergency; he'd always thought it to be a pointless precaution, but now he said a silent thank you.
  He pulled the needle and thread from the bag, pulled the antiseptic and the bandages out along with it.
  And then he got to work.
  ---
  Jimin couldn't bring himself to leave your side when his job was finished.
  He washed his hands, put on a fresh set of clothes, tucked you into the covers and then he just kind of sat there. The chair was uncomfortable, and he was exhausted, but the idea of leaving your side for whoever to walk in and use you as they pleased was an idea he did not want to risk.
  So he stayed.
  He drifted off a number of times, but was always startled awake by the crick forming in his neck. Eventually, he just started pacing up and down his bedroom, glancing at you every now and then to make sure your chest was still rising and the gauze he'd applied continued to keep the cut under control. He could do nothing about the bruises on your neck, simply wrapped an ice pack around them and hoped for the best. He would find the person who hurt you in such a way, and he'd punish them. Hopefully that would be enough.
  Never before had Park Jimin felt such anger.
  It was a surreal feeling, and one he was slowly beginning to realise he did not like nor appreciate manifesting in his bones. This wasn't the type of man he was; he enjoyed smiling. He enjoyed laughing, and having fun, and spreading the comfort and peace he knew he could bring to his people – this anger was just different, but it was overtaking him with every moment he had to ponder over what happened to you, what he could have prevented if he'd been there.
  It was such a bad road to go down, but he couldn't help it. As he paced the room, he could only think of what he could have done, what he should have done to get you out of the situation – it didn't need to be a physical altercation. He was the prince. Just showing his face, yelling at the culprit could have potentially saved you from harm.
  The sound of you groaning had him pausing in the centre of the room. He span on his heel, frozen in place. He watched you wriggle slightly beneath the covers before one of your eyes was opening-
  You shot bolt upright, scrambling for the knife he'd taken from the back of your trousers. A startled cry escaped you when you realised it was no longer there.
  Jimin darted to your side, grabbing your wrist before you could reach for anything else that may be used as a weapon. You were panicking, pain no doubt sparking the side of your face, but as soon as your eyes landed on Jimin's, your features softened and a sigh of relief slipped past your lips.
  “What are you doing here?” you whispered. You sounded drousy, like you were on the verge of falling back into slumber.
  Jimin couldn't help but smile. “This is my bedroom.”
  “Oh.” You slumped back against his pillows, and Jimin stepped to the side to admire the way you looked bundled in his sheets. “What am I doing in your bedroom?”
  “You got yourself into a bit of trouble.” He sat down on the edge of the bed. “How are you feeling?”
  “My face feels numb.”
  He chuckled. “Yeah, it will. You lost a lot of blood.”
  You frowned, reaching up to pluck at the gauze on your cheek. Jimin grabbed your hand and led it back to your lap. “Don't touch it. It'll hurt.”
  “It doesn't hurt. I can't feel it.”
  “Yeah, well, you will feel it if you pull the gauze off.”
  You grunted.
  Jimin rolled his eyes. “Why did you do it, Y/N?”
  You looked up, raising a brow. “Do what?”
  “I thought I was giving you enough to live a stable life,” he continued, because he knew he didn't have to explain himself. You may have been a little dreary, but you weren't stupid; you remembered exactly what the little altercation was that led you here. “Why did you have to go and put yourself in that position again?”
  You looked down at the quilt, biting your lower lip. The gauze tugged, and Jimin couldn't help but reach forward, tugging your lower lip from your teeth with the nail of his thumb. Your breath hitched, but it was only for a second – just long enough for Jimin to notice it, just long enough for his heart to speed up with your reaction.
  “Why?” he pushed when you stayed silent.
  “Because I'm a bad person.” Your voice was a whisper.
  “No you're not.”
  “Yes I am.” You shook your head. “I do this all the time, Jimin. It's who I am.”
  “But it's dangerous.”
  “My whole life has been dangerous,” you snapped. “Don't you understand? I'm not like you. I haven't been pampered my whole life; I haven't had everything handed to me on a fucking silver plate – I've had to work to get to this point. I've had to work to stay alive, because if I let my guard down for even a second, someone is gonna come up and slit my throat for whatever I have on me. That's not the kind of life you can just let go of because a pretty little prince has come to the rescue.”
  Jimin stared at you. You were wincing, cupping your jaw, but he could only concentrate on the words you'd just spoken; no, he didn't understand, and maybe that was okay. He wasn't a fool – he was open to admitting that, for his entire life, he'd had everything handed to him, and that was just the way it was, the way it always had been. He asked for something, and he got it – not because he'd worked for it, or because he necessarily needed it. He got it because he was Prince Jimin, and god forbid Prince Jimin doesn't get what he wants.  
  Yet here was, sat beside someone who had to work for the basic necessities that Jimin always thought were just handed out to everyone – food, clothes, water, shelter. Things he took for granted were the things you had to kill for, the things you had to protect with your life or risk losing them for good.
  He had the following and the popularity, but you were so much stronger than him.
  “Okay,” he mumbled.
  You looked up. “What?”
  “Okay,” he repeated, louder this time. He shoved his shoulders back. “It's okay.”
  You blinked.
  “We'll figure this out. You and me. I'll talk to my parents, get you pardoned-”
  “Jimin, I broke the law-”
  “So did I. By getting into contact with you at all, I've been breaking the law.”
   You scoffed. “I think it's a little different for you.”
  “Exactly. Which is why I'm going to help you, just as you've been helping me.”
  You paused. “Don't risk your reputation for me. I won't let you do that.”
  “You'll have no choice in the matter.” He stood up. “Do you want water or anything?”
  You gripped the bed sheets. “Jimin, don't you-”
  “I'll bring you up some tea. I make a good cup of tea.”
   “Park Jimin, get back here now! Don't you dare-”
  The door swung closed behind him, your voice disappearing behind the wood.
  He leaned his head back and grinned up at the ceiling, unsure as to why his heart was hammering in his chest, but happy that it was.
  ----
  “This is ridiculous. Have I told you how ridiculous you are?”
  “On multiple occasions. Have I ever told you how hostile you can be?”
  “You don't need to tell me.”
  Even though Jimin walked behind you, you could just tell he was rolling his eyes. His hesitant footsteps bounced off the walls of the palace, and you knew he was nervous; this was the day. You'd been on bed rest for a few days after waking up from the accident, Jimin popping in every few hours to make sure you were still breathing. He'd told you that he'd spoken to his parents, that they wanted to talk to you just to get a better understanding of who it was their son spontaneously decided to bring into their home.
  You were the pick pocket, the thief, the street urchin who was teaching their son how to fight with a sword.
  How you were going to make your introductions sound pleasant was completely beyond you, but you were willing to try. Jimin had been running himself ragged these past few days, both trying to keep you alive and keep his parents from completely losing their minds over what happened – the least you could give him in return was your attempts to make things right.
  The two of you approached the double doors leading into the meeting room. Jimin finally stepped up beside you, giving you a single glance that you did not return – you kept your shoulders drawn back, eyes dead ahead, heart thumping at a million miles per hour.
  Jimin inhaled before pushing open the doors.
  There they sat, tall and proud in their oversized chairs with their robes made of silk and their hair styled to perfection. They radiated power. They radiated dominance, immediately making you feel like the little kid who cowered in the streets all them years ago. You didn't like it. You'd fought that side of you off for so many years, that having it brought back to the surface now was paralysing to say the least.
  You stepped into the meeting room and bowed. Jimin stepped up beside you, and you had to hide your breath of relief when he did not move further into the room – he was staying by your side.
  “Your Majesty's,” you greeted. “Thank you for seeing me.”
   “Come in, Y/N,” said the queen. “Let us see you.”
  You did just that. If you looked hesitant, they would pick up on it – there was nothing worse than someone who wasn't sure where their confidence lay. You needed to give off the illusion that you were ready for this meeting, ready to impress them.
  “So this is the person my son has been talking about,” the king drawled. His dark eyes trailed up your form, a small frown taking shape. “I see your cheek's been healing well.”
  “Yes,” you replied. “Very well, thank you.”
  “Care to explain to us how you got the injury in the first place?”
  Jimin stepped forward. “I've already explained that, father. You agreed to give them a chance-”
  The king raised a hand. Jimin silenced almost immediately. “I want to hear it from them.”
  You glanced at Jimin, hoping to give him a look that said it's okay, but he did not look back at you. He kept his eyes on his parents, jaw clenched in a way you'd never seen on him before – anger was such a rarity when it came to the prince. Seeing it on him now almost made you uncomfortable.
  You turned back to the royals. “I was pick pocketing.”
  Jimin inhaled sharply. “I explained this-”
  “You do understand that that is a serious crime,” said the queen.
  “I do,” you replied coolly.
  The king and queen shared a glance. You watched your chances of getting out of this scotch free dwindle with each passing second – it was just going to get worse. They started with a kicker, and now they were on a roll; they would show you absolutely no mercy.
  And you certainly weren't going to beg for it.
  “Okay,” the king continued. “Now how about the fact that you have been teaching my son how to use a sword these past few weeks?”
  “He asked me to help him,” you replied. “I agreed.”
  “Why would you do that when you know it risks your life?”
  You shrugged. “I've never feared death, Your Majesty. I thought I might as well go down for helping someone out.”
  The king pursed his lips. Glancing to the side, you could just make out the small smile curling on Jimin's lips, one he tried to hide by looking to the floor.
  “You're name has gotten round the slums quite a lot recently,” the queen pushed. “Apparently you're quite skilled with a sword.”
  “Sharp things are my speciality.”
  “How many people have you killed with this speciality?”
  “Zero.”
  “You speak the truth?”
  “I defend myself, Your Majesty, but I've never killed anyone. Just because I was raised on the streets does not mean I have a brutal personality.”
  “And you don't think pick pocketing innocent men is a brutal personality trait?”
  You levelled the king with a look, shoulders pulled back. “The man I attempted to steal from a few days ago was a mistake – it was me being selfish. However, Your Majesty, I will not stand here and say I regret the work I've done previously. The people I steal from are the same people who will gladly stab me for simply standing in their way. I won't apologise for making their life a little bit more inconvenient.”
  Jimin inhaled. “Y/N-”
  “This is the type of person you want wandering our streets, Park Jimin?” the queen snapped. “You've come to us, begging for the mercy of a thug?”
  “Mother, if you'll just listen-”
  “There is nothing to listen to! They clearly have no morals – they're willing to put the lives of some of our finest tax payers at risk, purely for their own benefit.”
  “Now, Your Majesty, you're just putting words in my mouth.” Your voice was low.
  “I won't stand for it,” the queen continued. “Have they corrupted you to? Is that why you've taken such a liking to them?”
  You stepped forward, heart thundering despite the calm and collected expression on your face. “Jimin has nothing to do with my morals. He's simply been a friend since-”
  “Do you know what life on the streets is like?”
  Jimin's voice was strained, as if he'd been holding back these words but could no longer do so. Looking back, you noticed his clenched fists and his strained expression, veins popping from his neck. He didn't even look at you when he stepped forward, simply grabbed your arm and dragged you back behind him.
  “Jimin-”
  “It's hell,” he continued. “People like Y/N have to fight every single day just to get food in their stomachs, and you're going to stand there and tell me you don't understand why they would go out looking for the thickest pockets to pick?”
  The queen blinked. “It is a crime-”
  “It's life or death,” Jimin spat. “I think you need to spend less time worrying about the people who already have everything they need, and start focusing more on the people who can barely afford to keep themselves breathing.”
  You bit your lip – this was not the turn you'd expected. Jimin was angry. Genuinely, properly angry and he was going to get himself into so much trouble if he continued on like this. His parents would snap, and then it would be over for both of you, all because Jimin couldn't keep his mouth shut-
  “He's right, you know.”
  The kings voice echoed. Your head snapped up, jaw dropping open. For a second, you were almost certain you'd misheard him, perhaps started hallucinating from your previous injuries – but he was looking right at you, eyes soft, a tiny little smile playing on the edges of his mouth that set your head into motion.
  Was he actually agreeing?
  Jimin stepped back, falling into place beside you. Neither of you really knew what you were doing, but somehow your hands got tangled and then you were just holding each other's hands, looking up at the king with equally shocked faces.
  “I'm right?” Jimin echoed.
  “Dear, this isn't the time for your conscience to get involved,” the queen growled. “Y/N is up for a crime-”
  “We've ignored them,” the king said. “Y/N and everyone else we've claimed to be nothing more than strains on our society. Instead of complaining about them all the time, why don't we do something to help?”
  Jimin nodded enthusiastically. “Exactly.”
  You squeezed his hand. He quietened down.
  “I think we've done a disservice,” the king continued. “How can we expect people to just sit back and do nothing as their families starve around them?”
  The queen paled. “It's a crime-”
  “Our son has done the right thing by bringing this to our attention.” The king levelled his eyes on Jimin, who stood up a little straighter, pulled his shoulders back a little more. “I'd like to talk to you some more about this once you've got your friend settled in.”
  You blinked. Jimin blinked. The queen's jaw fell open.
  Surely that wasn't right.
  “Excuse me, Your Highness?” You stepped forward. Jimin tightened his grip on your hand, refusing to let you go in fear of you launching yourself at the royals. “What do you mean?”
  The king smiled. “The guest quarters will be good enough, I presume? You're teaching my son how to use a sword – it would only be convenient for you to be around a little more often.”
  “But-”
  “I'll get the quarters set up right now, Father!” Jimin yanked your hand, forcing you back into his chest. “Thank you!”
  Jimin did not wait for his fathers response. He span on his heel and darted back down the hallway, slamming the double doors closed once the two of you had stumbled from the tense meeting room. You fell into his arms almost immediately, knees weak with disbelief, heart thumping at a million miles per hour because this was the absolute last thing you had expected.
  “We did it!” Jimin exclaimed, wrapping his arms round your waist. You didn't even pull away, simply looked at him with a goofy smile on your face. “Y/N, we fucking did it!”
   “I can't believe this,” you whispered. “How did we even-”
  He picked you up and span you around, throwing his head back to laugh with joyous glee. You wanted to bottle up the noise, keep it in your pocket for a rainy day because you were fairly certain there was no better sound than Park Jimin's complete happiness.
  You wrapped your arms round his neck, nuzzling your head in his hair. The two of you laughed into nothingness, most likely looking like absolute freaks but not caring because the world was straightening itself out, and Jimin was holding you, and for the first time in your entire life, things were looking good.
  You pulled away. Jimin's arms slid away from your waist, letting you drop ever-so-gracefully to the floor in front of him; he did not remove his hands, and you did not remove yours. You looked into his eyes, grinning from ear to ear, hating the fact that you did not want this moment to end – not ever. You could stand in this hallway for the rest of your life with Jimin's hands on your waist, and you would not complain.
  “You did it, Y/N,” he whispered.
  “You did it,” you corrected. “I just made them angry.”
   “That's what you're good at.”
  You rolled your eyes, opened your mouth to retort, but the words were swallowed when Jimin leaned down and pressed his lips to your own.
  It should have been expected. With the intensity of which he'd been staring at you, the way you craved to feel his touch even more, you should have expected such a heart-juddering reaction, but it came as a shock anyway. Your eyes widened for a fraction of a minute before the world shifted into black and white and everything else melted away until it was just the two of you and the fire currently consuming your entire body.
  You kissed him back intensely – so intensely that you failed to realise you were pushing him back against the wall until he broke the kiss to giggle into your mouth.
  “Someone's eager,” he grumbled.
  You groaned and kissed him again. He kissed you back, holding you closer; you prayed he didn't let go, ever, ever, ever. You worked in sync. You pressed your body against his own. You danced, and it was perfect.
   He broke the kiss a second time, pulling back just enough to press his forehead against your own. You closed your eyes, biting your swollen lower lip, trying to catch the breath that had been stolen from you.
  “I think we need to get your rooms set up as quick as possible,” he whispered, breath fanning your face.
  You nodded eagerly. “Definitely.”
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thesportssoundoff · 5 years
Text
What Happens When You Take A Bad Idea And Make It Worse? LET’S TALK ABOUT THE BRAWL FOR ALL!
Joey
March 11th
The Mother Fucking Brawl For All.
Never in my wildest dreams did I ever think I'd actually get around to this but there are miracles around us and what better time than now? The Brawl For All is generally regarded as one of the worst ideas of all time in a business with an entire genre dedicated to grown men and women smashing each other with fluorescent light tubes and slamming one another on beds of nails and thumbtacks. In a business that up until the mid 80s featured nazis goose stepping around and up until 2003 or so regularly and routinely featured women wrestling in their bloomers, the Brawl For All is the one idea that every human being unanimously believes was a disastrous failure. It's the one unanimous tire fire that not even it's most ardent supporter can put out. Not even WCW's junkyard battle royale which featured multiple injuries due to WCW not gimmicking the cars and just having guys taking bumps onto cars and through glass windshields is hated this much. The Brawl 4 All is one of those things people can't even sum up with "It was bad!" and move on. You have to go through layers and layers and levels of badness. You have to view it almost as an affront to your sensibilities, as a personal attack on you as a fan. Hell not just as a fan but as a human being!
Vince McMahon and company have failed in previous ventures before and ventures after. The XFL, the World Bodybuilding Federation, the ECW relaunch, 65% of the undercard Attitude Era angles, their really expensive WWE Films attempts. Some could even argue that the brand split originally was a failure in some respects given that Smackdown never really got going on its own and Raw declined sharply from the brand split onward. That said those failures at least had SOME inkling and morsels of promise behind them. Not the Brawl For All. It was a bad idea from the start, a bad idea during and made even worse by what happened afterwards. Also? The Brawl For All is one of those things that every wrestling fan and every wrestling personality has a hard opinion on, the kind of shit that lends itself to so much gossip, rumor and conversation. Over the next few weeks, I want to discuss the Brawl 4 All a bit more. I want to delve into it because it's as close as we'll ever get to a universal no hope no spin failure by the WWE and because...well...it's one of my favorite fuck ups of all time. It's always been something that fascinated me from watching it live as a casual fan to laughing at it as a smart fan when I stumble across it to making a near yearly pilgrimage to youtube to watch every single fight of it I can find before it got yanked. It's one of those wrestling stinkers that like December 2 Dismember or the Heroes Of Wrestling card that I'm magnetically attracted to. Every wrestling fan FEELS for the Brawl For All even if those feelings are utter disdain for everyone involved with it.
The Concept And How Fucked It Was From Jump
To get why this even happened, you have to go back in a time capsule. Despite catching fire in 1998, the WWF (for the purpose of being as thorough as possible here, we're gonna call 'em as they were when this happened) is still struggling to keep track with WCW Nitro. They're in the midst of an 83 week long ass eating from Ted Turner's Atlanta based wrestling promotion and "good ideas" are running dry. Understand that at this point the WWF has the single hottest property in the business but that sole property isn't enough to get over the hump vs the NWO, the cruiserweights, an ascending Bill Goldberg, Bret Hart, the return of Sting and what was genuinely just a better overall card. Even if Wrestlemania 14 gave birth to so many great stories going forward (Austin vs McMahon, the hard reboot of DX as a faction, Kane vs Undertaker's first match), WCW is in the midst of its highest grossing year ever. Vince McMahon has James Harden putting up 50 points a night and winning on his back but he's still looking up to the Golden State Warriors. Making matters worse, both companies are in the pro wrestling equivalent of an arms race.  Remember how when the UFC and Bellator in 2014 and 2015 signed anybody with a pulse because they were trying to fill up two insanely bloated schedules? It's a bit like that. Anybody who is good (and not a walking flag factory so to speak) is either in WWE or WCW at this point which means if you ONLY have two hours of content, you've got a lot of guys doing nothing.
The Brawl For All on its surface and without malice seems like an awful idea to try and remedy that. Pit sixteen dudes in a shoot tournament and let them go at it with set rules in place. It gets guys on TV, gives them something to do and at the end, in theory, the winner doesn't just get a big financial prize but come out in the end as a star. It's a chance to do something with a section of guys who are doing absolutely nothing at all. Sounds good, riiiiight? Well now let's break into some sexy rumor mongering about what this really was about:
-We can start with the mastermind! Vince Russo is the man who apparently concocted this concept which should be somewhat redeemable if what I laid out above was entirely 100% accurate. It's not entirely the case, even according to Russo's own words. Per Vince Russo, a large reason the Brawl For All came to be was that he had a beef with one of the wrestlers (Bradshaw aka John Bradshaw Layfield aka that guy who got flattened by ring announcer Joey Styles) consistently bloviating that he was the toughest guy in the locker room. Right off the jump, any sort of noble designs are whittled away. Now often in pro wrestling, there's 100 different stories to the same single event often shared by people IN the same room. Imagine how pronounced it is that a) everybody agrees that it was Russo's idea, b) everybody is under the impression that it was over a tiff with a pro wrestling with no shoot fighting experience and c) EVERYBODY agrees it was one of the worst concepts imaginable. The Brawl For All's entire seed was planted not so much out of a design to get guys work and on TV but out of wanting to see a loud dude get punched up. That's insanity out the gate.
-The Brawl For All was by invitation only and depending on who you believe, the process to select wrestlers was rather...exclusive. Bruce Prichard discusses in his podcast with Conrad Thompson that he was the guy who had to round up the talent to fill enough spots in the tournament. Prichard says he had to play to the egos of wrestlers and in a separate interview, Bart Gunn talks about how he got recruited basically by another member of the writing team as well. The name Bart Gunn will become pretty important down the line so jot that down in your notebooks real quick. Wrestlers were recruited with what seems like a pretty easy enough pitch and one I'd imagine that the UFC uses today  with their fighters; basically a "I mean don't you believe you're the toughest dude here?!" and a "We'll pay you!" and we're off to the races. Despite this, the Brawl For All struggled to get people to fill in the spots in no small part due to the fact that no star is going to partake in an absolutely stupid concept like this when they can just make their money being a star. The Brawl For All isn't even a TUF; it's a PFL tournament where all the dudes nobody else wants are lumped into a tournament format with the golden carrot of a $100,000 prize at the end of it.
-Perhaps worth more than the $100,000 prize was the either legit or illegitimate golden carrot of the winner getting to work a program with "Stone Cold" Steve Austin. Understand that no one single act was as hot and drawing as much money at this time as Steve Austin was. He was the it guy, the biggest star in the business and noway near close to peaking as a talent either. The Brawl For All $100,000 prize? That's cool and all  plus that was basically the downside guarantee for a year's worth of work. The opportunity to work with Stone Cold on a pay per view? That's the big money ticket. That's the opportunity to be a made man like how working with Hogan in the 80s was. For top guys, that opportunity may come along at any given point. Again going back a bit to TUF and the PFL, imagine if the UFC offered eight of its guys the chance to compete in a tournament for $100,000. Enticing! Now imagine the winner gets to fight Conor McGregor on a PPV. Tell me if it doesn't get every guy not named Khabib and Tony Ferguson jumping into it. That would be a great no doubt can't miss opportunity!
EXCEPT
-It was probably a lie. Scratch that. We can factually tell that any sort of Austin match for the winner was a lie since every person involved (sans one) says it was real and the winner never actually got said shot. Imagine if the tournament wasn't build on anything truthful but instead on a "The winner will be in the mix" from Dana White. While Bruce Prichard says there was no official plan for the winner to face Steve Austin, everybody else involved from talent to wrestling guru Jim Cornette seems to suggest there WAS a plan in place for the winner to win. That is, assuming of course, the winner was the guy they thought was going to win all along. More on that in the future but just know that the Brawl For All's fighters were flirted with a hush hush unofficial promise of facing Steve Austin that was probably never going to be fulfilled unless won by a specific party. Bart Gunn says he was told the winner would face Stone Cold and well....more on that at another time. Let's just say sports entertainment and combat sports have a long storied history of perhaps listening to the matchmakers a bit too closely.
-The rules for the Brawl For All? Well those were a mess. According to Bruce Prichard, the rules were still being worked out the week of. According to Steve Blackman (a dude who Bob Holly admits would've won the whole thing), there were plans to allow leg kicks and those rules just happened to get yanked the week of. The glove size seems to change depending on who you ask as the WWF says they were 16 ounce gloves but Bart Gunn argues repeatedly they were 22 ounce gloves. Some of the guys admittedly didn't even think it was a shoot fight either and at least one fighter fought thinking it was a work. According to Bart Gunn, even halfway through the tournament he kept expecting it to be a work suddenly.  The "official" Brawl For All rules had points for takedowns, points for a knockdown and points for more punches thrown across three one minute rounds. The scorecard part doesn't even matter at this point. To be honest, it didn't even matter then.
So let's talk about the big problem here
So imagine putting together a tournament designed around the concept of "Who's the toughest guy!" in a show where the audience is conditioned to believe that the toughest guy is the world champion or if the champion is a heel, the toughest guy is the babyface chasing said champion. We already in theory know who the toughest guy is or at least we're willing to suspend our disbelief. Also if we're to believe that the winner of the tournament is the toughest guy in the company, why aren't the big name tough guys we've been told are the tough guys competing in it? The concept falls flat right there on its own but the hole isn't deep enough. We gotta go from six feet to nine feet so now imagine that you've come up with this concept that pees on the first rule of your product. Make it worse. Make it so that the audience is being told to believe that what they see HERE AND ONLY HERE is legitimate.  NOTHING is as frustrating in pro wrestling as "a shoot." For those not addicted to sports entertainment meth, a shoot is something on the program that the audience is led to believe is real. Now for something to be "real" on a show that's already "real" then that in turn means what we're seeing is fake, right? So a "real fight" on pro wrestling ultimately means that what we're seeing is fake. Now most wrestling fans since the 70s and 80s have probably believed wrestling in some form or fashion is/was not real. We accept it as entertainment and as Jerry Jarrett once lovingly put it "theater of the illiterate." The key is to not remind us that what we're seeing is clearly fake (a problem wrestling fans seem to be having right now with Ronda Rousey). Reminding the audience that what they're saying is predetermined scripted fakeness and then asking them to invest into the REAL portion of the product that breaks their illusion only works if a star is doing it. It doesn't work if a bunch of random dudes and mid carders are doing it. Imagine if in the middle of one of those UFC Embedded gimmicks, we saw Conor McGregor rehearsing the press conference lines and then he went out to try and sell his beef with Cowboy Cerrone as legitimate. You've already hurt the audience's feelings and the Brawl For All actively did that at a time where all WWF fans wanted was to watch Stone Cold kick ass and DX make inappropriate jokes. You've brought DOWN the segment.
So now we're nine feel into the hole. Let's go sixteen feet deep. Nope! Let's go from here to fuckin' middle earth on this bad boy; pro wrestling is a TEAM effort. It requires two or more able bodied people to work together to create a magnificent fake fight spectacle that tells a story and ends with you becoming emotionally invested in its finish and what's to come. That requires participation. Now come up with a tournament where guys are going to beat the holy shit out of one another FOR REAL and then have to go back to participating with one another as if nothing happened! Every single wrestler involved in the Brawl For All has spoken about the bad blood and residual effects the Brawl For All had. Also remember these are not trained fighters either. Some of these guys are amateur wrestlers who probably haven't done that for years. Some dudes dabbled in kickboxing or BJJ on their spare time or in years outside of wrestling had some formal combat sports . Some of these guys were bodybuilders by trade and some of these dudes were just pro wrestlers who happened to have a few "So and so cleaned out a bar room with one hand and six beers!" type magical fishing trip stories. So you're taking a bunch of ego driven (some chemically enhanced) guys and sending them out there to beat each other up on a Monday or a Tuesday and then magically get over it in time to make the house show loop where they're going to team together. We've officially come out the other end through China, folks.
And yet despite all of this very obvious right in front of our faces warning signs, the Brawl For All existed.
Next time we'll talk about who was in it a bit more---and why IF the Brawl For All had a true tertiary motive designed to elevate one guy to superstardom, it was an even bigger failure than humanly possible.
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jovialyouthmusic · 5 years
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Charlotte’s Choice
A Royal Romance AU fanfic
17 The Lord of Misrule Part one
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Who is the Lord of Misrule, and what mischief will he cause?
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16 The Lord of Misrule Part one
‘Your Lord of Misrule for today is Bradley de Montfort, sponsored by House Nevrakis’ announced Constantine. Brad looked genuinely surprised, and Drake slapped him on the back enthusiastically as the crowd applauded. Maxwell followed suit, and Rashad shook his hand, smiling warmly. Neville shook hands but scowled, Milo did so too, face impassive and Tariq bowed stiffly, looking sulky. Anton made a grand effort, shaking his hand graciously but repeating the strategy he had tried when Drake won the horse race, pulling Brad toward him to unbalance him, but Brad placed his hand on his elbow to neutralise the ploy.
‘Bradley, please step forward and select your Bondsman, Cup bearer and Jester’ Constantine announced. Brad smiled, waved and stepped up to the microphone. Behind him in the centre of the dais were two thrones, one each for himself and for Charlotte.
‘My Lords and Ladies, citizens of Cordonia, I thank you for this honour.  I name Sir Drake Walker as my bondsman, and Lord Neville my cup bearer. My jester will be Lord Maxwell Beaumont’ Drake nodded and pressed his lips together approvingly, Neville scowled, and Maxwell gave a whoop and pumped his fist.
Constantine turned to his aide to hand over the ceremonial garb which had been made by local schoolchildren, and motioned Charlotte over. He handed her a bright cape trimmed with a feather boa and smiling warmly she swept it over Brad’s shoulders and fastened the gilt chain around his neck, adjusting it so it laid flat. She leaned forward to speak privately to him
‘Well done Brad, and any differences we have are forgotten – at least for today, and hopefully for longer. I’m happy to be your Queen for the day’
The crown, made from brightly painted papier mache, was handed to Drake and he stood behind Brad to carefully place it on his head. The scowling Neville was handed a sceptre to give to Brad, and the only things left then were the jester’s cap and stick. It was Brad’s task to place it on Maxwell’s head, who immediately started to caper around making the bells jingle. Drake leaned over to Brad, who looked more regal than he should in the garish cloak and crown. He turned to the crowd, Charlotte by his side. She extended her hand – he took it, and together they made a curtsey and bow to the crowd. Brad led Charlotte to the thrones to leave her sitting while he returned to the front of the dais ready to make his speech. Drake stood on one side, Neville on the other. Drake leaned closer.
‘Why didn’t you make Neville the jester, that would have made him really miserable, that’s what I had planned’ he whispered. Brad kept a serene expression as he looked out over the crowd.
‘And that would have made everyone else miserable’ he replied quietly ‘Max was born to be jester’ Drake shrugged in reluctant agreement.
‘Good point’ Drake conceded ‘Make sure you work Neville, and I’ll keep on his case too’
‘What are you two commoners whispering about?’ grumbled Neville. ‘So you made me your cup bearer, big deal. Let’s get this farce over with as quickly as we can.  I can’t see how you could possibly win this, you must have fixed the ballot.  I demand that it be looked into’
‘By the time it’s been examined this will all be over, Neville, and the vote was by sealed ballot. We have twelve whole hours together’ said Drake coolly ‘And remember, you have to carry out your task to Brad’s satisfaction, or it’s the stocks for you’ Neville snarled disgustedly but didn’t repeat his demand.  It was time for Brad to make his speech, so he stepped up to the microphone.
‘Ladies, Gentlemen and ordinary citizens of Cordonia, I’m touched that you would vote me, a stranger to your country to be Lord of Misrule. Your country and mine share this tradition of overturning the establishment, so I feel at home in this beautiful place.’ The crowd cheered, and Brad continued ‘I am honoured to head this celebration and want you to know that the usual conditions will apply. All those of Noble birth will serve the ordinary citizens of Cordonia at the coming feast and all areas of the fair will be open to everyone.’ He paused, looking over the crowd.
‘In addition, I will also overturn generally accepted gender roles. The ladies present will be proposing toasts and asking the men to dance, and I invite everyone to cross dress – women will wear suits and the men will wear dresses.’ There was a ripple of surprise and shock at his words, but he continued ‘The services of the Manor wardrobe mistress will be available for anyone having trouble finding garments, starting from now to accommodate the numbers anticipated, and you will find a number of second hand and exchange clothes amongst the stalls at the Apple Fair along with changing booths’ The marquee was quiet for a while, some faces showing shock, then Olivia started to clap. Slowly people close to her joined in, until the whole room applauded, some laughing and cheering. Constantine looked on serenely, but Drake could see a muscle twitch near to the corner of his eye. Brad made a gesture to quieten down the crowd.
‘This rule is not compulsory, but a prize will be awarded to the best cross dressed couple, generously donated by Lady Olivia. The prize is a week’s stay at Lythikos Lodge to enjoy the skating and skiing facitities, all expenses paid.’ A cheer went up from this implied that the winner would be chosen from outside the Court, who had only just returned from Lythikos.
Brad and the court of Misrule made their way through the crowd. A huge cheer went up as they processed to the staging area where Brad would choose the Apple Queen from assembled schoolchildren. Maxwell capered around making the crowd laugh, jingling the bells on his hat and on the jesters stick that he held. Charlotte was all smiles, her hand on Brad’s arm. Drake walked on Brad’s other side, and Neville walked behind, scowling as he supported the garish cloak to keep it off the ground.
The children, aged between five and seven, were waiting in line and Brad took time to talk to each one of them, kneeling to come to their level and asking them questions, Charlotte following him. The littlest girl was shy and tried to hide behind her teacher’s skirts. Brad held out his hand to her.
‘Hello, what’s your name? Did you help make the crown?’ The little girl nodded, biting her lip. Her teacher leant down to encourage her.
‘It’s all right, you know this man is going to pick the apple queen. Look, Princess Charlotte is with him’ Brad nodded at the shy child.
‘That’s right, Princess Charlotte and I are friends. My name is Brad.’ He took off his crown and looked at it ‘I like this crown, but the Apple Queen’s crown is much nicer. If you tell me your name, I’ll let you wear it’ At last she spoke
‘Me? You’d let me wear it? It’s so pretty’ Brad waved Charlotte over, and she knelt down beside him. The little girl looked more comfortable – she and all the children knew Charlotte, as she regularly visited the school to read Cordonian fairy tales to the children.
‘I think we’ve found our Queen’ he said ‘But she’s too shy to tell me her name’
‘Molly’ said the little girl ‘But I’m too little, nobody will see me wearing the crown’
‘Well Molly, I can let you sit on my shoulders if you like, then everyone will see you.  When you have the crown on, you’ll sit on the throne and be carried around like a real Queen for everyone to see’ At last the little girl broke into a smile.
‘Yes please!’ she cried happily, and true to his word, Brad picked her carefully up and put her on his shoulders, carrying her to the Apple Queen’s chair, set on a litter so that it could be carried by the Lord of Misrule and his ‘court’ at shoulder height. Molly giggled and waved at her friends. He put her down in front of the throne where last year’s queen was waiting to put the crown on her head and put the cloak around her shoulders. Molly smiled and waved as she got onto the throne, and Brad, Drake, Maxwell and Neville carried her around the crowd to loud cheers.
By the time they had been round the whole crowd and deposited Molly at the Marquee where the children were eating and would be playing games after, it was time for the banquet. Before they left, little Molly threw her arms around Brad and hugged him.
‘Thankyou’ she beamed ‘are you going to be King when Princess Charlotte is Queen?’ Brad grinned lopsidedly
‘Perhaps, she will pick the person she likes best’ he explained
‘I hope it’s you Brad – you’re nice’ the little girl said and skipped off to join her friends. Outside, benches had been set out for feasting, and folk sat waiting for the Nobles to come around with trays to distribute the food. There was already a smattering of people who had changed clothes, and much hilarity at some of the men wearing dresses.
‘I think it’s time we changed’ said Brad, and Drake groaned
‘Do we have to?’
‘I’m afraid we should set a good example my friend’ Brad replied, and Drake put his hand over his face, dragging his fingers down over his skin ‘I have just the outfit for you, Walker’ The four men started back toward the Manor, Neville trailing behind sulking. As they approached the changing cubicles in the boutique, he stopped dead.
‘I refuse to wear a – a DRESS’ he announced, ‘It’s not dignified’ Drake turned on him.
‘That’s the whole point of the Lord of Misrule’ he said ‘we step out of our roles, so we earn a little humility. I think it’s a great idea to see the world from a different perspective, even if it takes me out of my comfort zone. I’m willing to give it a try – how about you?’ Neville folded his arms and shook his head.
‘Out of your comfort zone? You’re halfway there, commoner’ he spat, and Drake’s fists clenched, his knuckles white.
‘May I remind you that any infringements of the Misrules will result in a period of time in the stocks, with folk lining up to throw wet sponges at you?’ Brad pointed out, and Drake smirked, enjoying seeing Neville squirm.
‘You said it wasn’t compulsory’ said Neville stubbornly
‘I’m afraid it is for my retinue, it’s all written down – if you ask Bastien he’ll show you’ Brad said evenly. Neville snarled back at him as Drake started to grow angry at his refusal to play along.
‘You can’t make me’ Drake stood in front of Neville and screwed his fists into his jacket lapels, pulling him close so he was in his face and scowling.
‘There’s nothing I’d like better than to see you in the stocks, but as Brad said, we need to set a good example. So help me, I’ll rearrange your face if you don’t change right now’ Neville’s features contorted in fury.
‘You threaten me with violence? I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised for a commoner to lose his temper’ Drake held him tighter, the skin over his knuckles whitening, his lips tight over his teeth.
‘If I’m not wrong, it was you who got angry first over following Brad’s rules.’ He hissed. Brad put his hand on Drake’s soothingly as Maxwell hopped from leg to leg, distressed at the confrontation.
‘Gentlemen let’s not fight please, its very simple. Neville, either you wear the clothes I picked out for you, or you spend an hour in the stocks. At least take a look at them first.’ Drake let go of Neville reluctantly. He had been looking forward to thumping him in the face but realised that was probably not in the spirit of the Lord of Misrule and would probably get him into deep trouble. Brad was a good calming influence, he observed.
‘Very well, I’ll do as you say – but you’ll regret crossing me, commoner.’ Neville spat. He disappeared into the dressing room allocated to him and Drake stood guard outside. Drake heard a scream of rage from inside, and Neville reappeared holding a lacy pink thigh length dress trimmed with feathers.
‘You want me to wear this?’ He sputtered. Maxwell clamped his hand over his mouth but couldn’t stop the laughter bubbling up until he gave up and doubled over with mirth. Drake smirked but didn’t dare laugh in case the outfit Brad had picked for him was worse. Brad was the only one with a straight face. Max cried out suddenly in recognition.
‘Oh – oh! Neville you know that’s one of Ana de Luca’s latest pieces? Nobody’s worn that except the models on the catwalk’
‘If you please Lord Neville’ Brad said evenly. Drake crossed his arms and stood menacingly next to Brad until Neville retreated back into the cubicle. He reappeared in the dress a few moments later and sat outside the cubicle, head in hands. Brad stood over him while Drake vanished into his cubicle. A grunt of approval rang out and Maxwell’s ears perked up.
‘You found something you like, Drake? You must be embracing your inner woman’
‘I’m not entirely sure how to put this on’ came Drake’s answer. ‘I think Brad needs to assist me’ Brad turned to the younger Lord Beaumont.
‘Make sure Neville doesn’t chicken out, Max’ he said ‘This might take some time. Drake and I are going to be wearing similar outfits’ Maxwell looked puzzled
‘I can’t wait to see. I’ll make sure Neville’s still here when you come out – off you go’
From the dressing room came various comments from then on - turn around – and again – now tuck that in – there - and pin that – now pull that up – yes that’s it now – take those off – nope not allowed. Now do me – you tuck it in - ouch - mind the pin - is it straight? How does it look – ready?
At last the two men reappeared, and Maxwell gasped.
‘Oh wow – you look amazing, both of you!’ he exclaimed. The two men were wearing traditional Scottish dress, complete with tartan kilts, sporrans and long socks with a dagger, or ‘dirk’ tucked in to one leg. Neville looked up, his face purple with rage, speechless at the injustice.
‘Wow’ repeated Maxwell ‘I do think it’s kind of cheating though’ Brad grinned.
‘Perks of being Lord of Misrule’ he replied.
‘Oooh I hope you’ve got that for me – tell me you have!’ Maxwell cried, jumping up and down. Brad looked sheepish.
‘Sorry Max, unless you can promise not to do any cartwheels – nothing’s worn under the kilt, you know’ Max’s eyes grew wide
‘Nothing – you mean you’re…’
‘Going commando’ smirked Drake ‘It’s - kind of liberating’
‘You’re deliberately humiliating me’ spluttered Neville, but Brad shrugged.
‘Only if you see it that way. Now Max, go and change’ Max disappeared into his cubicle and let out a loud laugh.
‘Oh my goodness, I don’t believe it’ he chortled. In a trice he reappeared, dressed exactly like Neville, whose eyes bulged with surprise. ‘I LOVE it’ exclaimed Maxwell, turning to look at himself in the mirror.
‘You shouldn’t jump to conclusions, Lord Neville.’ Brad said with a serene expression’ I chose the outfit for Lord Maxwell, and didn’t think you’d mind matching with him, as Drake and I are dressed alike’ By now Neville was in a foul mood and leapt to his feet, storming toward Brad to stand with his face only inches from his. Drake surged forward but Max put a hand on his arm, and he stood back reluctantly, rage boiling just under the surface.
‘You commoners think you can do anything. You don’t have a chance with the Princess, I’m going to enjoy your humiliation when she picks someone of noble birth - it’s only fitting and proper’ Brad didn’t flinch – he was used to dealing with drunks and thugs, and Neville was nowhere near as intimidating as a Scotsman on the rampage after his football team had lost.
‘Actually Neville, I am of noble birth, as my uncle died without an heir to his title in England. I just heard this morning that my application has been approved and I am officially Earl Bradley de Montfort of Rutland’ Brad said coolly. Neville stepped back, spluttering and stammering.
‘I – you – you haven’t heard the last of this. I won’t stand for this humiliation’ Drake stepped forward menacingly, fists clenched by his sides.
‘You can and you will, Lord Neville. Don’t think for a moment that you have a chance with the Princess, but you will behave properly and help the fair run smoothly or look like a fool in everyone’s eyes’ he spat. Neville turned on Drake, real venom in his eyes
‘YOU – you’re the real commoner here, I wouldn’t expect any less of you, you mongrel, you aren’t even pure blood Cordonian, your mother was American. I refuse to take part in this any further. I am going straight to the King to protest the improper…’ Drake lunged toward Neville, fist cocked, but Brad intercepted him, grabbing his arm and twisting it up behind his back.
‘Godammit Brad, what are you doing?’ he raged ‘Let me at that pompous ass’ Brad kept hold of his arm as Neville cowered.
‘Think about it, Drake’ he hissed in his ear ‘What would Charlotte say if she knew you’d punched Neville? He could press charges and you’d be knocked out of the running’ Drake struggled but Brad twisted his arm a little further and he sank to his knees.
‘Gah, Brad!’ he gasped ‘It would be worth it, Charlotte hates his guts. He’s spineless, a worthless sack of shit who doesn’t care about anything but his own damn pride and looks down on anyone who doesn’t have noble blood’
‘I’m sure Charlotte would never utter words like that’ Brad said, teeth clenched ‘and you, my friend, need to calm down before you do something you might regret.’ Drake relaxed, and Brad let up the pressure on his arm.
‘Okay, I’m calm, I won’t hit him’ Drake conceded ‘You can let go now’ Brad did so, and Drake snatched his arm back, rubbing his shoulder and glowering at Neville, but staying out of reach. Maxwell was looking from one to the other, visibly upset.  He didn’t like violence and he was usually able to joke his way out of bad situations, but this had him flummoxed.
‘So what now? Drake asked. Brad shrugged
‘Well if Neville is so hell bent on walking out, he forfeits his right as a suitor and loses the opportunity to win Charlotte’s hand’ Neville looked up sharply
‘Wait, what? asked Maxwell in surprise
‘Read the terms Max, we all signed a contract when we decided to compete for Charlotte’s hand’ replied Brad ‘Don’t you read the things you sign? It states that barring injury, illness or family emergencies, each suitor has to fully participate in every event or forfeit their right to continue’ Drake laughed.
‘Well well, looks like you’re on the back foot now Neville. If you want to carry on, you have to follow Brad’s rules’ he crowed.
‘Hence my stopping you from punching him’ said Brad ‘If you’d been arrested for assault you’d have been eliminated’ Drake paled a little
‘Wow – you really saved my bacon, Brad. Thanks’ he mumbled.
‘So’ said Brad, turning to Neville ‘It’s your choice, Lord Neville. Carry on with the day’s activities or withdraw and forfeit your right to be suitor’
‘Fine. I will stay, but I will be lodging a complaint against you, so called Earl Bradley, and I will personally be waiting for corroboration of your claim to nobility’ snarled Neville.
‘Okay, let’s go’ Brad got up ‘I don’t know about the rest of you, but I’m hungry’ The four men strode back out across the lawn toward the marquee.
Charlotte had decided to change her clothes before serving food and was going toward the manor when she noticed the stalls stocking second hand clothes for folk to wear for the Lord of Misrule’s decree. She smiled at some of the items and picked a few things out before returning to the manor. She met Olivia on the way.
‘Hi Olivia, what do you think of Brad’s dress rule? Did he tell you what he was going to do?’ she asked as they walked together.
‘He didn’t give me a clue’ she replied. ‘It’s no big deal for us, but some of the men are throwing hissy fits’ she laughed. ‘Lord Percival has taken to his guest room with a suspected stomach bug, but I think he just can’t bring himself to put on a dress’
‘Do you know what you’re wearing?’ asked Charlotte, and Olivia nodded
‘Oh yes, I’m going for a uniform – I’m going to wear Army camouflage.  I checked with Jasmine, she has just the thing’
‘That’s a great idea Livvy, it will really complement your hair’ she exclaimed. Olivia indicated the package she was carrying
‘Is that your costume? she asked, and Charlotte nodded
‘Yup, I saw something on the way over, I’ve got everything I need here. I’ll come with you and you can be first to see’ The two friends went to the changing rooms where Jasmine, second wardrobe mistress, had Olivia’s clothes ready. She changed and waited for Charlotte to emerge from her cubicle and laughed when she came out.
‘Oh my, Drake will just love that’ she snorted
‘Do you think so? I saw it and thought he’d get the message that I’ve forgiven him for our argument the other day’ she smiled. She wore jeans, a white t shirt and a denim shirt, with the difference that the shirt was oversized and tied in a knot around her waist, accentuating her figure ‘It’s also very practical and comfortable’
‘I think its just adorable’ said Olivia ‘Actually I’m glad to have a quiet moment with you – can we talk?’
‘Of course Livvy, is everything alright? asked the Princess. Olivia nodded and caught her arm, and the two of them left the fitting rooms and went to a nearby drawing room. Olivia shut the door and turned to her friend, taking her arm again and sitting her down.
‘Lottie, you mustn’t tell anyone about this, and I really hope you’re okay with it’ she said in a low tone.
‘Okay with what, Livvy? she asked. Olivia drew a deep breath, patting her friend’s arm
‘I won’t beat around the bush Lottie, Brad was going to tell you but with being the Lord of Misrule he’ll be busy today so it’s better coming from me’ she paused, and Charlotte waited in suspense for her to go on ‘Brad and I – we’re kind of an item. We slept together, and he said he didn’t want to string you along if we’re together.’ she looked pleadingly at her ‘Do you mind Lottie? I didn’t tell him, but this time it’s different. I really like Brad and I – I think I’m falling for him. For starters I stayed with him overnight, and we – well it’s been more than once, not like my usual flings’ She bit her lip and waited for Charlotte’s reaction. After a short while of looking surprised, Charlotte broke into a smile.
‘That’s great Livvy, of course I don’t mind. Brad is great, very likeable despite our falling out, but I can tell you’re really into him, so – yes it’s fine by me’ Olivia gave out a sigh as she had been holding her breath.
‘Oh thankyou Lottie, that means so much to me. You said the other day he was a contender – but you argued with him, and I – are you sure?’ Charlotte patted her hand
‘Like I said, he’s great, but he’s also a foreigner, which wouldn’t be popular with the people.  I think he’ll make a good friend, but I don’t think we were meant to be lovers. I’m happy for you Livvy, I hope it all works out for you’ Olivia wiped a tear from her eye.
‘I’m so glad Lottie, I would hate to fall out with you. He caught my eye the moment I saw him – and I know he impressed you too. I half wanted him for you, and half for me when I invited him over. I thought he’d shake things up a bit – and he has, hasn’t he?’ Charlotte nodded but went on.
‘We’d better keep it quiet Livvy, I’d like him to stay on as a suitor, even if only as a friend.’ Charlotte said ‘Father will be wanting me to drop one or two soon. Neville and Tariq are the ones I really can’t see myself with, and they would both make terrible consorts, and even worse Kings’
‘Sure thing Lottie, I’ll tell him as soon as I can – though you’ll probably get a chance this afternoon.’
‘It will be better coming from you, I’m sure’ Charlotte asserted, and stood to give her friend a hug.
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diem-writes · 6 years
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1hour ficlet batch 5 #3
Another prompt given to me by @lazyblizzarddefendor Asking for a story about 2 of my favorite people in the Yuri on Ice universe. So how could I ever refuse.  I’d write a dozen more of these, if people simply asked. :}
A Touch of Cold
The stares are maybe colder than the howling wind outside of the motel room they ended up getting stranded in. Why they are sharing is just a matter of dumb luck, and the being stranded sheer bad luck all wrapped into one unpleasant situation.
“I don't care, as I'm the youngest it's only fair if I get the bed. I know the ground is dirty but you can take the bloody chair if you think you are too good for it.” Yuri snarls out, still shivering from the melting snow that had gotten down his hoody earlier.
“I mind neither the chair nor the floor, but common rules state that if I take up either one it does mean that the bedding is mine.” His voice is forced through clenched teeth, he wishes the heating will soon start warming the room but he fears it greatly.
“The hell.” Two large green eyes stare at him in disbelief. “I've never heard of any such rule. Why should I believe you it exists?”
Seung-Gil sighs. He is only one second removed from rubbing his temples in the same way he had seen this boys coach do when they had skated together at worlds.
“It seems that my experience with Victor Nikiforov proved me right then after all. Your coach fails to teach common sense to his skaters.”
“At least my coach knows how to train winners.” The defiant flick of the chin makes Seung-Gil laugh, something that even surprises him.
“Yes you win. I am starting to think that is all you are good for.” He smiles. “My coach tries to do the same for me, maybe it is my common sense and shreds of humanity then that are preventing me from being no more than a medal hoarding pack animal.”
The hurt look on the kids face make Seung-Gil waver in his conviction for a moment.
“What do you know about me. Do you have any idea what my life is like. You just stand there being some smuck bastard thinking he knows what the hell he is saying. You know shit about me.” The tears that form in Yuri's eyes are forcefully wiped away.
“You know what. You can have the bed. It isn't the first time I slept on a cold floor without food or heat.” He steps up to Seung-Gil, nearly pressing their noses together. “And once I'm out of here I will use that memory as I've been using for the past ten years to beat you and everyone else for every medal and prize money out there, so that I will never need to do it again.”
Yuri turns ready to pull the flimsy blanket of the bed, and ignore Seung-Gil for the rest of the night. Hoping they can get out of this bloody snow blizzard the next morning. He's stopped when Seung-Gil grabs his wrist.
The dirty look on his face deepens when he sees the look of sorrow on the other face. Crap the last thing Yuri wanted was for this ass to feel pity for him. He wants to live in a world where no one will ever look at him with pity in their eyes again.
“I was unaware that you had a past like that.” He gives him a tentative smile. “Knowing that, I can only admire how you have put yourself together. My apologies for making you feel like telling.”
Yuri takes a moment to asses the situation. Maybe the look he's getting isn't pity, but guilt. Yuuri had told him that that had been what he had felt when he had heard Yuri tell Victor the truth. Guilt for making Yuri relive moments of his childhood he rather not wishes to be reminded of.
“Yakov and my grandpa have done everything in their power to make certain it's not common knowledge. I would appreciate it if you keep it to yourself.”
Seung-Gil blinks a few times before he nods. If that is all he is more than willing to give his word about it. He too has things he rather not have the press found out. So he decides to even the playing field.
“I'm terrified of women. To the point I had to move out of my family home when I was about your age as the thought of my mother's friends and their daughters was giving me hives.”
He can't blame the chuckle when he is met with a look of complete disbelief. The growl when Yuri thinks he's being made a fool off makes him even burst out in laughter.
“I'm not joking. One of the reasons I am always doing my best to avoid Sara Crispino is because whenever she gets her hands on me I have to put on this awful smelling lotion on my skin that itches like crazy.” He looks a bit bashful “It influences my skating and not in a good way either.”
“Is that why there's such a big difference between some of your performances?” Then Yuri bites his lip and looks a bit more suspicious. “If that was really the case, why is your coach a woman?”
Seung-Gil sighs. “Because she is the one I can afford once I payed for rink time, and costumes, and my skates. There are some male trainers but they are nearly twice as expensive, and they will not even consider me till I've proven to be able to bring in enough money from my skating to be worth their time.” The shrug tells Yuri all he needs to know.
“It does explain why you are so bloody rude to her all the time. I'd have an issue with a coach that is giving me hives as well.” The snort that follows the words is quickly followed by a short cough.
“Oh damn. You are cold aren't you? Why don't you take a shower, get out of those wet clothes. I'm fairly certain nobody is wanting for you to get cold.” Yuri finds himself pushed towards the doors to the bathroom attached to the room.
“And I've thought of something about the bedding. If both of us put on our spare clothes from our bags, the bed is just wide enough to let us each have a side. That way we both lie comfortable and have use of the blanket in case the rooms heating never gets up to par.”
Yuri looks from Seung-Gil to the bed. Sure he's slept on worse, even shared a bed with his grandfather for a while before he started to make enough money to get noticed by sponsors. It would be the best solution. So he gives a quick nod to agree, grabs his bag, and slips into the bathroom.
After taking a quick wash down with one of the towels because the water of the shower never managed to become more than some lukewarm drizzle, he snuggles into his favorite longsleeve shirt, and biggest hoody. Putting his training pants over one of his dancing leggings, hoping that will keep him warm. He walks back into the room to find Seung-Gil already passed out at one side of the bed, maybe wearing even more layers than him.
'Ha' Yuri thinks, off course he went for this solution, if a Russian like Yuri is already cold there is no way that somebody that comes from a country with far more agreeable temperature isn't freezing to the core.
It takes some tossing and turning for Yuri to decide that the mattress is not one meant to give comfort to whomever is on it. He looks at Seung-Gil and notices that once the guy relaxes he doesn't look half as put off as he normally does.
Yuri's fingers softly caress his eyebrows, coming to the conclusion that they are what give the normal stern look. When two eyes flutter open a bit he pulls back his hand, only to realize that Seung-Gil hasn't really woken up. The eyes slowly close again, and Yuri finds himself lying there for a long while wondering if he was shocked or amazed at the soft look they had had.
When Victor manages to get a spare key for their room after they do not respond on his or Yuuri's knocking he is surprised to find the two young men completely wrapped in each others arms, dead to the world, with the softest smiles on their faces.
Knowing this is the calmest Yuri has been in ages he and Yuuri slowly slip back out of the room and decide to brace the storm a bit to go to the nearby diner and get them all some breakfast. It will be early enough to wake them once they can do it with fresh sandwiches and something to drink.
If you like this story or any of the other 1 hour ficlets, please consider sending in a prompt to get one for yourself.
buy me a ko-fi
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paulinesherrera · 4 years
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How to be a Lady Boss
Concurrent societal norms and back in the traces of our history, oftentimes dictate how women should act, dress, speak, work, and involve in the midst of living in a patriarchal society. As we mature, we face a lot of occurrences where we realize that there are several things we should be in control of, and the reason for this is because we have the power. Women have the authority and liberty to decide on how we should set up our lives. Women can be independent of men and judgments of people.
Being a lady boss does not only denote to be a proprietor of a company, to marry a king, and to be a president next to Aquino and Macapagal, but it is more like a personality of being the CEO of our own lives, and drilling strength to carry on things each day.
These 10 tips on how to be a lady boss will give us the route to instill inner peace and the sense of individuality:
1. Mind your own business
You don’t have to compare your life to someone else’s life. Their concerns are none of your business, lest it contribute growth to your wellbeing. Not everyone cares, but not everyone matters. Focus on achieving your own success, and remember that you’re doing this for the betterment of yourself –not for the sake of winning a competition and to brag the prize.
2. Ditch the unnecessary
Gossips, trash talks, futile conversations, unhealthy stalking, keeping toxic people, and obliterating other’s reputation must not be on your to do list. If it isn’t worth investing time on, ditch it.
3. Move in silence
Being a lady boss doesn’t have a machine gun kind of mouth. They scrutinize the context rather than dispensing out their thoughts instantaneously. Unhealthy ranting doesn’t help. While it may be a way to vent our judgments, stooping down to someone else’s level doesn’t make you a lady boss.
Don’t waste your energy to something not worthy of your time. Instead, endow yourself in expressing constructive criticisms on highly informative matters. Take control of your mouth, ladies.
4. Get things done by yourself
Asking for help in doing something you can’t do on your own is fine, but if you can manage, try to do it alone. Make that circumstance as a training of independence, and not relying on to anyone for simple hitches.
This tip also suggests that you should concentrate on your academic and professional endeavors because by being busy in getting the hang of something that contributes to your success will make you a certified lady boss.
5. Practice to manage your finances
Spend your money on things that are necessary. A lady boss spends wisely, not expensively. By controlling your expenses, you can practice discipline. Think of spending for long-term items rather than investing on fads. You’ll never know when you’ll need it, so might as well keep it.
6. Have courage to take opportunities
You have to open your doors to something new because being stuck to where you are now, although comfortable, will not make you propagate as a human being. They say that strong people accede changes, and these changes include taking new opportunities to learn and grow.
Invest on your profile so that you’ll never worry about the contents of your curriculum vitae. Be courageous because you can!
7. Practice a decent attitude
Having a decent attitude is tantamount to being cautious in conversations, keeping heads up despite the setback, displaying appropriate manners and etiquettes, and being able to interact with different personalities.
There is no question on your practices, clothing, and belief, but make it sure that you are being appropriate in different settings. After all, in order for a lady boss to earn respect, she must learn how to respect first.
8. Build your confidence
Confidence is replicated in the way you present yourself. Do something to be comfortable in everything that you do, wear, talk, and most especially –the confidence in the way you live. Always smile and show the world that you exist, that you can manage your life, and that you have a value. This is the tip that suggests to take care of yourself, help yourself, love yourself, because nobody else will do it best, but you.
9. Never chase anyone but your dreams
If it’s not worth chasing for, never go after it. It’s alright to make a mistake in deciding sometimes, but you should get up and never let your tiara fall again. A lady boss wouldn’t want to look desperate on temporary things, but if it is about your goal in life, work hard and put a 100% effort to achieve it.
10. Don’t forget the heart
It doesn’t mean that you’re a lady boss, you wouldn’t care for or belittle other people. Being a lady boss has an inspiring heart to be kind, and have the strongest heart to forgive even when people don’t apologize. Lady bosses are life motivators, silent achievers, and gentle helpers --and those, ladies, are the things that make a woman more exceptional.
It is worth it to train your mindset as early as now in order to unnoticeably feel the changes it can do in your life. It doesn’t matter what our demarcations as a woman are, we can rule our lives because it is ours. Know your worth and never settle for less! The power lies within your hands right now. The question is –how will you use it?
Boss up! Love, Pau. ♥️
Disclaimer: Attached photo not mine.
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puestadesolparaiso · 4 years
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Paradise
Paradise
I dream of a paradise that is fully and entirely mine. In this paradise i have my own big, beautiful apartment. My bedrooms vanity is littered with expensive lotions, perfumes, cosmetics, etc. I have a wall dedicated to beautiful sneakers and heels. The walk in closet is filled with form-fitting clothes that complement my brown skin. My hair is long and dark, and when I wake up in the mornings I pray and drink purified water and a healthy breakfast. I’m financially stable in this paradise. I go grocery shopping every week, my skin is clear, eyelashes are long, I’m healthy, happy, and winning. I won’t have a man in my paradise, I’m selfish because I busted my butt for years to get to my paradise is one piece. I’m living in a beautiful neighborhood, I’m working as a nurse and every morning I slide out the door with my badge draped around my neck because I’m ready to heal some hurt folks. I’m not in debt, I take care of myself and I love myself fully in this dream. I love myself so much I start glowing on the outside and people start to notice how beautiful I really am because of how pure my heart and intentions are.
What paradise means to me:
A huge beautiful house.
My toilet is far away from the sink and especially the shower. The wardrobe in the bathroom is fully stocked with after-shower robes, wash clothes with my initial(A) on the corner, all types of moisturizers 🧴, soaps, perfumes, etc.
the kitchen: has a beautiful island in the middle. Lots of storage space. I’m loaded up on food and have an emergency stash of food Incase of emergencies. I have many bags full of long lasting food that I give to the homeless. The windows are big and beautiful and everything is nice and clean and it smells like vanilla. The flowers in the flower vase are fresh and beautiful. I might even have a pet bird. I even have a washing machine and the Samsung smart fridge in my kitchen which plays ocean waves and inspirational quotes
Living room: I have a fireplace and a huge tv.
The bedrooms are always neat and tidy and clean. I have a study/office with lots of my books and prized possessions. My bedroom is GORGEOUS🥰🥥. All the rooms have silk pillows and pillow cases
I have a beautiful garden
I have many spare bedrooms for my friends and family when they spend the night.
Misc: I have purses and bags with long lasting foods, water bottles, money, beauty products, etc for homeless women and men. The stairs are all decorated with glitter. There are lots of live plants. There’s a pond, lake, ocean, etc nearby and I can clearly see the sunset and sunrise from my bedroom or kitchen. I want a balcony to watch the city from
Paradise: a entirely different state of though/mentality. A life of luxury. Complete and utter happiness and serenity in an emotional,physical, and mental sense. I’ve wanted this since I’ve beaten my raging depression. I’ve wanted this every since I’ve decided that I’m going to live for me and nobody else. Getting to paradise means everything to me. Growing up poor, paradise is the only escape from a life that was once riddled with embarrassment, anger, bitterness, and depression. I think time is the most essential to getting to paradise because I could have gotten dealt the worse hand to play with and had to work 10x harder than I do now and the only thing that would really matter is how much time I have to get from point A to point B. I don’t need luck, pity, mercy, etc. The most vital thing I time because I know I’m strong enough to pull myself up from the gutter. When I think of paradise I think of vavish mansions and gold watches, intricate tattoos gracing the majority of my skin, fananciql and emotional stability. In a world where when I think to hard my head starts to pound, and I begin to overwhelm myself with what if’s, should have, would have, and could haves, paradise is the only thing that makes sense. It’s the only thing that’s plausible. So when a teacher sits me down and asks me where I see myself 5-10 years from now, I don’t always have an answer. I just smile and say.. “home.”
Jobs:
Dress/clothes/fashion designer
Veterinarian
Doctor(plastic surgeon)
Nurse
911 opperater
Baker
Book store worker
Flower shop owner
Bar tenders
Jewelry designer
Bank accountant
News reporter
Lawyer
TRAVEL destinations
Japan
California
New York
Honduras
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impala-dreamer · 7 years
Text
This Ain't No Joke, Sweetheart - Chapter 1
SPN FanReality
~Let me tell you about my weekend with the Winchesters…~
Beka ( @impala-dreamer​ ), Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, Steph ( @torn-and-frayed​ )
3,379 Words
Warnings: It’s insane, but clean. Maybe some curses, I can’t remember.
A/N: This is not a joke. My weekend was pure insanity, and I thought I would write it all up and share it with you because, that’s what I do. You probably won’t believe me, but here it is. I’ve broken it up into chapters to save you all from reading almost 24,000 words at once. So… enjoy, I guess. I did…
Go To Chapter: One ~ Two ~ Three ~ Four ~ Five ~ Six ~ Seven ~ Eight
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Chapter One: Friday Evening…
Hey guys. Here’s the thing: I usually tell you stories when I get inspired by a song, or an episode, or a prompt, or whatever. But this story… as much as I still can’t believe it, this is all true. Not “inspired by true events,” no, 150% all natural, 10/10 this happened to me…true. I know you won’t believe me. Hell, some mornings I don’t even believe me, but unless I was hallucinating for forty six hours this weekend… this is legit.
Let me set the scene for you just so you can follow along. I’m Rebekah. I go by Beka, as you probably know. I live somewhere in the lower end of northern New Jersey. I can see New York from my house, which is where I grew up. I’ve got an attitude, an accent, and resting bitch face. My eyes roll freely and my eyebrow is usually raised. I’ve got a husband, two kids, two cats, and life is fairly normal. Well, OK. Some days are harder than I’d like, but that’s not what I want to tell you about. The boys and hubby were gone that weekend, out on a boys-only retreat with grandpa, leaving mommy home to relax and recharge. But, damn, that didn’t happen.
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Friday evening. My favorite of evenings, especially when the house is quiet as it was then. It was raining, so I lit a candle like I always do. Some strange tradition my mother and grandmother passed down to me. This one was particularly yummy. A large, three-wick Bath and Body Works Bergamot Mint scented candle. I like to think that’s what Sam Winchester smells like. Manly, kinda spicy, hints of orange and mint. Just a little headcanon of mine. Anyway, the candle was lit, the lights were dim. I had a tumbler of honey whiskey on the rocks, and Netflix loaded and waiting. For good measure I brought my plush Tardis blanket to the recliner and snuggled down, ready to commit to finishing Season 6 in one sitting. Hey, don’t look at me like that. You’ve done it too. And anyway, it was for research. I’m working on a Soulless Sam smut. *insert shoulder shrug here*
I clicked play and episode 6.9 began. I gave a little chuckle when I read the title. “Fight the fairies!” I exclaimed to no one. Yes, sometimes I talk to the TV. Ok, most times I talk to the TV. Whatever. Anyway, as I’m waiting for the opening disaster, I take a nice long sip of my whiskey and then roll my eyes as the doorbell rings. “Seriously?” I pause the show and take a moment to adjust myself after climbing out of my chair.
My front door is directly behind the recliner, in a little “entryway.” I stumble over my son’s snow boot that keeps escaping from the closet and peek out the large frosted glass door. Two tall figures darken the portal, their faces in shadow, their outlines lit by the yellow street lamp behind them. Now, I’m not a tiny woman by any measure, but I’m still a woman, home alone, on a dark and stormy night, so the thought of opening the door to two huge men kind of panicked me. But, whatever, this isn’t a movie. What could happen?
I turned the knob and opened the door. Their images were still dark, and slightly skewed by the screen door, but I gasped in shock nonetheless. Standing before me, in all their denim and flannel glory were Sam and Dean Winchester. My mouth dropped and my brain sizzled. I’m not an idiot, I realize that’s impossible. Someone was playing a joke on me. A strange, brilliant, expensive joke. But it was April, and my birthday had just passed, so… maybe. Or I was dreaming.
“Rebekah Jones?” the Dean-like one asked. He was holding a slip of wet paper, his eyes narrowed and examining my face as he spoke.
“Er… yes?” I wasn’t sure I had actually answered, what with the shock I was in, but I suppose I did make some noise because he nodded and continued.
“Hi. Uh, my name’s Dean Winchester, this is going to sound strange but…”
I laughed. He stopped and glared at me. I laughed again. I couldn’t help it. “Dean Winchester? Uh huh, and this is Sam Winchester, right? Nice. Um… you guys are like, really good impersonators, like… really good. But, I’m sorry, roleplaying kinda freaks me out. I don’t even cosplay at Comic Con anymore so…”
The Sam-looking man on the right spoke up, his voice a perfect copy of the man I knew from television. “We’re not roleplaying. I’m Sam, and we need your help.”
The laughter was unstoppable. It bubbled up from my stomach in awkward giggles as I held onto the door frame for stability. “This is just odd. Wow.”
“Dean” reached for the handle of the screen door and pulled it open, leaning down a bit to meet my eye line. “Rebekah, this is serious.”
God, his eyes were so green. Wow, even in the darkness they stood out like a forest. “Sam and Dean are fictional characters. On a TV show. Thanks, but I’m not buying crazy today. I’m all stocked up.”
He let the screen door close as he spun around exasperated, turning his back on me. When he spoke next, it was to Sam who kept his eyes on me, watching carefully. “I told you she wouldn’t believe us. What’s the plan?”
The taller man pretending to be Sam shook his head, “This is the plan. She’s the only plan.”
OK. They were good, I had to give them that. Same facial expressions, same tone of voice, same… wait… My brain clicked into something and I went with it. “Holy shit!” I exclaimed, causing Dean to turn back around with hope in his eyes. “Are you guys…” My heart beat so fast at the thought I expected to pass out. “Jensen and… Jar- Jare- Jared?” To say my eyes grew wide at the idea would be an understatement. I probably looked like a creepy anime with heart eyes.
“What? No,” Sam said. “I’m Sam Winchester, and this is my brother, Dean. Could you please let us in, we need to talk to you.”
“Jensen Ackles and Jared Motherfucking Padalecki are on my porch!” I squeezed my eyes shut tight as my hands shook. That had to be the explanation. Had to be. But then again… “Wait, aren’t you guys supposed to be in Vancouver? No, wait… what con is this weekend… Seattle? No, that was last week, wasn’t it? Oh well, either way you’re a long way from where you should be.”
“You ain’t kidding sister, but we’re not Jensen or Jar-whatever. Dean. Sam.” Dean pointed between them both, trying desperately to get me to understand.
“This is an April Fools joke. I love it, I do. Please, come in…” I stepped back and opened the door to let them pass, my hand closed tightly around the door knob. I was shaking, there was no hiding that.
“This ain’t no joke, sweetheart,” Dean said as he nearly tripped over the same boot I had.
“Gah! He said ‘sweetheart’!” I yelped under my breath and bent to pick up the shoe, tossing it towards the closet.
Once Sam was in, I closed the door and turned to face them. Dean was in my living room, looking around cautiously while Sam kept his attention on me. I looked up, my body practically melting at the sight of him. He really was incredibly tall. I’m six foot tall in socks, and I know he had boots on, but wow, they did not exaggerate his height at all. Also, he was fucking gorgeous. I hadn’t realized how hard I was staring until he blushed and rubbed the back of his neck with one hand. Just like Sam. Oh, he was good. Totally in character.
“Listen,” I said, mustering up as much courage as I had left, “I don’t know what contest I entered to win this, but this is like… incredible. You guys are my favorite. Supernatural is like, my life. OK, that sounds weird, but you have no idea how much your show means to me. Like, literally saved my life so many times, and I just… thank you.”
Jared/Sam smiled kindly, showing off those prized dimples and making my knees a little weaker than they already were. Behind us, Dean was wandering about, peeking behind corners and generally being nosy.
“I know this is strange, Rebekah,” Sam said, “But this is real. We’re the Winchesters.”
“Beka,” I said with a sigh. “You can call me Beka.”
“OK,” he laughed, “Beka. Nice. We got sent here, given your address and…”
My attention was no longer on the man in front of me, but on the other who had just found my shelf of collectibles. Jensen/Dean ran his hands over the dark cherry wood and picked up a matchbox car replica of the Impala. “Hey! No touching! Those aren’t toys!” I snapped as I had so often done with my kids. Nobody plays with mommy’s things.
He laughed and set the car back down, grabbing my favorite Pop Figure, Mark of Cain Dean.
“What are these?” he asked, spinning the toy in his hand and looking over at me with raised brows.
“They’re Pops. Put it down!”
Instantly he returned the toy to it’s spot and stepped back with hands raised in surrender. “OK…” He rolled his eyes as if to say, “hey, crazy person alert.”
I turned back to the Sam character and sighed. “OK, so… what are you doing here? I mean, yeay! Oh my god, you’re here! But also… what are you doing here?”
Sam took a deep breath and began, “There was a portal, apparently a bunch of monsters got sucked in and dropped into your world. We found it, hopped in, and here we are. We need your help.”
“Uh huh,” I crossed my arms and considered his words for half a second, deciding to play along. “OK, let’s say I’ve not gone crazy and you’re not Jared and Jensen.”
“We’re not!” Dean chirped from the stairwell. He was peeking down into my husband’s workspace, nodding in approval at the vintage albums that covered the walls.
“OK, you’re not,” I continued. “So you’re Sam and Dean and I’m not insane. Gotcha. What do you need with me? And how do you even know who I am?”
“Cas,” Sam said simply.
“Cas. As in Castiel, angel of the Lord, baby in a trench coat, love of Dean’s life, Cas?”
Dean’s head popped up, “What?”
“Don’t worry about it,” I yelled back, and then winked at Sam, “You know what I’m talking about, right? Him and Cas…” Sam shook his head in confusion. “OK, nevermind. That’s for another time. Castiel gave you my name?”
“Yes.” Sam nodded. “And told us you could help.”
“I’m not… I mean, I’m not a hunter. I’m an office manager. I do paperwork and answer phones. This isn’t… I can’t… nope.”
“Listen Sweetheart,” Dean said, walking back towards me. My heart leapt at the nickname once again. “Why don’t you suspend your disbelief for a few hours and help us out? Obviously we’re here. We’re real. Just roll with it.”
He had a point. And yet… “OK,” I looked back at Sam. “Jared just had a new addition join the family. What is it, and what’s it’s name?”
Again he scrunched up his face, confused by my question. “I don’t know… a dog?”
If he was acting, it was believable. I swallowed hard, my face falling as my brain tried to decide if I was happy that it wasn’t Jared and Jensen or terrified. “It was a baby. Odette.”
“Weird name,” Dean chuckled.
“I think it’s sweet,” shrugged Sam.
“I need a drink,” said I.
I pushed passed Sam and headed towards the kitchen for the booze. Behind me, Sam called, “Do you mind if I use your computer real quick?”
“Yeah,” I waved behind me. “It’s over there,” I pointed towards the messy desk. “Password is Impala.” I heard Dean laugh but I kept my course steady, retreating into my kitchen and collapsing against the black countertop.
I ran my hands down over my face, trying to calm the shaking in my brain and sighed. “You are not crazy. You are not crazy. You might be crazy.” I pulled my phone from my back pocket and pulled up Skype, needing to tell someone and confirm that I was still alive and not floating in some psychotic hallucination.
I shot off a quick message to Steph and waited somewhat impatiently for her reply.
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Well, that got me nowhere. Good to know she’s not a millionaire though, I guess. Why would she believe me? I didn’t believe me. I shook my head and dropped the phone onto the counter, turning to the liquor cabinet. I say liquor cabinet, but it’s really just a Tupperware graveyard with a bottle of whiskey tucked into the back. I pulled out the JD and went to get some cups as my phone buzzed. I picked it back up and swiped, the screen revealing a Tumblr notification.
@torn-and-frayed mentioned you in a text post… 
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Goddamn it, now everyone would know I was teetering on the edge of insanity. I considered reblogging and yelling at her for a moment, but Sam’s voice pulled the idea right out of my head.
“Um, Beka? What is this?”
That can’t be good, I thought as I carried the bottle and glasses back into the living room. Sam was seated at my computer, Dean lurking over his shoulder. They were both reading something on the screen, Sam’s eyes wide with shock and Dean’s face filled with a smirk. Oh…shit.
I set the booze down and ran over to them to see what could be so horrible. Yup, my worst nightmare was coming true. I had left my docs open and Sam Winchester was currently reading a half finished Sam Winchester smut piece.
“Ohhh my god…” I cringed and fought with his hand for dominance over the mouse, quickly clicking it closed.
“What was that?” he asked innocently, looking up at my red face.
“It was…nothing.” I tried to laugh it off, but there was no way.
Dean grinned. “Sam’s long fingers brushed against your nipple, teasing the bud into a stiff peak…” he quoted me.
“Oh fuck me,” I groaned. “OK, I might… dabble in… erotic fanfiction.”
“Dabble?” Dean laughed again, “There’s like a hundred docs here.”
“OK fine, I write porn!” I threw my hands up and spun around, more embarrassed that I thought could be possible. “I’m sorry! I write porn about you guys!”
“Wow,” Sam said, sitting back in the chair, quite embarrassed but hopefully flattered.
Dean strutted over to me, “Do you write any about me?”
I frowned and nodded. “Yeah,” I confessed quietly, “Those are my more popular ones.”
He laughed and looked at his brother. “Hear that Sammy? I’m more popular.”
“OK, let’s forget we had this conversation,” I begged and grabbed the whiskey, pouring three large drinks, and shaking myself again. How could this get worse?
Sam cleared his throat and agreed. “Yeah. Forgotten.” Somehow I didn’t believe him. “So, it looks like there was a 911 call placed earlier this evening.” He began reading from some website I’d never seen before, it looked like a police blotter. “Says, police responded to a call on West 5th Street, two bodies found behind a dumpster at SGG Window Factory.”
My ears perked up, “Holy shit, I know that place. It’s by my office. Like, four blocks away from here.”
“And you didn’t notice the sirens?” Dean asked, picking up a glass and swirling the contents.
“I mean, I’m not exactly in the woods here, sirens are like background noise at this point. No, I didn’t notice.”
Dean shrugged and downed his whiskey in one large swallow. He lowered the glass, licking his lips. “Is this honey flavored?”
I grinned, “Yeah, I’m a girl. Sue me.”
Sam stood up from the desk and joined us. “So you wanna go take a look?”
“At what?”
“At the crime scene.”
“Me?” I shook my head. “No. Why would I want to do that?”
Sam sighed, his big shoulders dropping, “Beka, we’re gonna go look. For whatever reason, you’re involved in this or Cas wouldn’t have sent us to you. You need to come with us.”
“Yeah but…no.”  
“Come on,” Dean urged, “What’s the worst that could happen?”
I sneered at him, “Uh… death? Dismemberment? Heart ripped out? Um… take your pick. Look guys, I watch the show. Maybe I’m not the opening scene victim, but I know what happens to women who team up with you two. They die. Bloody. Beka don’t play that.”
“That’s not true,” Sam defended, a twinge of hurt in his voice.
“It kinda is,” I said. “I can give you a list, if you want.”
“Hey,” Dean pulled my attention to him with his stern yet calming voice and laid a hand on my shoulder. “Nothing’s gonna happen to you. You hear me?”
Maybe it was the pressure of his hand on my shoulder, or the look of utter truth in his eyes, but I suddenly believed him. He was real. Sam was real. Whatever was happening, was actually happening. I had two choices. One: run away screaming up the stairs, locking myself in my bedroom until they left, or two: have an adventure of a lifetime.
The closest I’ve ever had to adventure was this one time, before we were married, Billy and I went on a camping trip up in the mountains. It was July, and it was terribly hot, but the couple we were with insisted we have a fire, so my man and I went in search of firewood. We came across a motel sporting a sign offering wood for cheap, so we pulled over. The manager greeted us, and seeing what a nice couple we were, offered to get us some top quality hickory firewood from his private stash. I still don’t know why we did it, but we piled into his golf cart and let the man, Mike, drive us into the woods. We got the firewood and before returning us to our car, he asked in a more than creepy voice, “Do you like views?”
Well, hell, we were in a horror movie. I cowered and gripped Bill’s arm for security, but he laughed and said, “Yeah, why not?”
What I had thought was the dumbest mistake of our young lives turned into one of the best. Mike drove us literally up the mountain and took us to the very top where he had cleared a lot to build a cabin for his wife. We stood in the clearing and looked out across the sky. The trees around us framed a perfect sunset; the mountain air was fresh and clean, and the scene was magical. Sometimes, what appears to be a recipe for danger, actually yields something good.
“Beka, you good?” Dean asked, pulling me from my memory.
One look up into his sparkling eyes and I had made my decision. I was in. All or nothing. Crazy or not. Possible impending death be damned.
“Yeah. Let’s roll.”
To Be Continued… Chapter Two...
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Sammy Lovers: @akoya-pearls @jealousbitxh @niamandthings @ofloveandlonging @paleogamrgrl @spontaneousam @troubletrumble 
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Why we need feminism.
Yes, I’m a feminist and I believe in having equal rights. No I’m not another man-hating female. I’m only here to speak for injustice done to women. Usually people misunderstand the meaning of it because there are some ladies who literally want equal rights but then use the ‘lady card’ for their comfort zone but those are women who grew up in a privileged society or those who doesn’t know a thing or two about it.
1.) Having an equal pay. Many females face this situation where their male co-workers are paid more than them because they think females are weak, unorganized and not as intelligent as males. Otherwise I’d love to know the reason why women don’t have an equal pay.
2.) Aspiring young girls to marriage. Of course we’re always told marriage is everything from the start but there’s much more in life than just that. Many women who didn’t marry were happy with their lives, they travelled, they learned and lived life to the fullest. Most women are considered helpless and weak when they aren’t married. Marriage is a choice not a necessity, people should stop forcing girls to marry because they’ve got absolutely NO RIGHT on them and their lives.
3.) Killing girls right when they’re born. Yes this still happens in a lot of places because sons are mostly favoured. This usually occurs in villages or even cities! Also in countries the modern practice of sex-selective abortion is often discussed as a closely related issue. Female infanticide is a major cause of concern in several nations such as China, India, Pakistan and Afghanistan. Who can afford to have a girl who’ll just do the house work till we marry her to some guy. Right?
4.) Education. This is usually one of the most important issue we face in countries. Many girls don’t have the access to education because of their genders or because parents can’t afford it but yet educate their sons somehow. A son’s education is more important cause they’ll earn for their families and themselves while girls will be married at a certain age. Equal education, besides being a basic human right, is an essential tool for achieving social change, improved health and decision-making. In addition, investing in formal education yields high social and economic return, increasing economic growth and sustainable development in less progressive nations. Not many girls are grown up in a privellaged society. In countries like India, Pakistan, Afghanistan, Nepal, Haiti, Cambodia and Egypt over 60% of the women don’t get educated.
5.) Not allowed to have an opinion. A women should be quiet when men are having a conversation, the ones who do speak are considered ill-mannered because nobody likes a women who talks too much and is argumentative. Female politicians/debaters etc are always interrupted in the middle of their speech or when making a point, yet people are surprised when a women interrupts a man. It’s always expected of a women to be all shy and quiet most of the time.
6.) Considering women only for cooking, cleaning and all the other house work. Oh c'mon this one’s way too common or at least for me because of where I live. Girls are taught to clean and cook since a young age instead of teaching boys these basic needs too. Obviously, it’s always less expected from a man to do all these cause they never had that kind of mindset from the start. She’ll have to do all this work when she marries otherwise who’ll ever marry her?
7.) Blaming rape victims/sexual assaults for their clothing. The idea that clothing could have importance in a conversation about sexual assault/rape may sound familiar to you. Statements like “She was asking for it” in relation to someone’s clothing and their rape have been swirling around for years, along with rape survivors being asked things like "Well, what were you wearing?“ It is the go-to scapegoat and that sort of language has led to the unfortunate truth that most people find some fault with the woman who herself was assaulted. Clothing is blamed for sexual assault rather than well, the obvious, the person who decided to rape. Even women who are fully covered get raped or even if they weren’t what right did anyone ever had to touch someone without their permission? Disgusting.
8.) Early marriages. In some places girls are married right when they reach puberty instead of marrying them when they’re ready and with their choice. Each year over 15 million girls are married before the age of 18. In many communities where child marriage is practised, girls are not valued as much as boys – they are seen as a burden on their family. Marrying your daughter at a young age can be viewed as a way to ease economic hardship by transferring this ‘burden’ to her husband’s family. Child marriage is also driven by patriarchal values and the desire to control female sexuality, for instance, how a girl should behave, how she should dress, who she should be allowed to see, to marry, etc. Families closely guard their daughters’ sexuality and virginity in order to protect the family honour. Girls who have relationships or become pregnant outside of marriage are shamed for bringing dishonour on their family. families and sometimes girls themselves believe that marriage will be a solution to secure their future. Giving a daughter in marriage allows parents to reduce family expenses by ensuring they have one less person to feed, clothe and educate. Families may also see investing in their son’s education as more worthwhile investment. In some cases marriage of a daughter is a way to repay debts, manage disputes, or settle social, economic and political alliances.
9.) Men usually take credits for their work. This happened a lot of times, here are some of women who had changed the world with science but unfortunately men took all the credit. Cecilia Payne: discovered what the sun was made of. Was told not to publish her work by a reviewer, Henry Norris Russel. Four years later he repeated her work, published it and was given all the credit. Jocelyn Bell Burnell: discovered the first pulsar. Her senior, Anthony Hewish put himself on the paper. Got all the credit and the Nobel prize. Lise Meitner: co-discovered the nuclear fission. Her colleagues intentionally published the paper without her name. They went on to win the Nobel prize. She went on to be forgotten. Nettie Stevens: discovered sex was determined by chromosomes. Sent her work to Thomas Morgan. In public he dismissed her and called her “just a technician.” He published his book on sex determination and took all the credit.
10.) Always told to act like a girl. I’m sure pretty much all of us have heard the phrase “you’re a girl so act like one.” Well no, I’m going to act however I want. We’re always told to be all ‘girlish’ We’re supposed to like the colour pink, do the house work, sit properly, not be sporty, dress appropriately, be sensitive, speak softly, have the most perfect body and glowing skin. Women don't age without people constantly bombarding them about grey hairs, wrinkles and weight gain. How dare a women's body do what it's supposed to do. Omg. Women are only useful at 18-30 after that they expire right? And oh how can I forget "guys don’t like girls who’re fat, have a smart mouth, doesn’t have the perfect skin and colour."
Feminism isn’t a man-hating movement, no, I believe that every men and women should feel free to be sensitive. Every men and women should feel free to be strong. To do whatever they like, to become whatever they desire. Although it specifically focuses on pushing women up to equal status with men. Thinking about it in another way, the Black Lives Matter movement is not called the All Lives Matter movement because white lives obviously are treated as though they matter anyways. Of course everyone’s lives and rights matter, but the people fighting for equal rights are the ones who create the movement and the name. Feminism is so stigmatized because even women are internalizing the logically flawed bullshit that idiots on the internet are posting. Pink shouldn’t be a 'girl’s’ colour, boys CAN play with dolls, boys CAN dance in heels, boys CAN wear makeup/dress up as girls, boys AREN’T there to protect women. “Women are more likely to be attracted to personality and men are more likely to be attracted to physical appearance.” Maybe that’s because we teach women to see men as people and teach men to see women as objects. - 1 in 4 women are still raped. - 5 million women STILL starve themselves to look 'beautiful.’ - Women’s health, freedom, safety and reproductive rights are STILL threatened around the world. People say we shouldn’t have feminism, I think WE DO. Every movement has it’s extreme, there are always people who make it hateful and disgusting. Which is the reason why people are misguided. Feminism isn't bullshit or cancer because you can clearly see somethings definitely need a change in our societies. No matter our race, religion or beliefs, we're all human, we breathe the same air and each and everyone of us deserves equal rights.
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Dream Alliance: Story from the Telegraph
Warning: Welsh words and a long post @sherlockvowsontheriverstyx (I’ve spent an hour crying over this bloody horse and his owners); @horsesarecreatures
A new documentary tells the incredible true story of Dream Alliance, a horse bought for £300 on an allotment in Caerphilly who went on to win £137,000 in prize money
Dream Alliance won £137,000 in prize money in his 30-race career, including victory in the 2009 Welsh Grand National Photo: Louise Osmond
It is late morning on a freezing day in Cefn Fforest, Caerphilly, a village in one of the poorest mining valleys in Wales. Brian Vokes, 67, unsteady on his legs and with far more tattoos than teeth, is making his way towards his allotment on a former slag heap. He has rented it from the council for the past 15 years, since the four coal mines surrounding the village were finally shut down and their tips flattened, bringing deprivation and the loss of livelihood to generations to come. Chickens and geese squawk noisily in their wire coops. Detritus – a bath here, bricks under flapping tarpaulin there – lies about the place. This is not the kind of allotment that produces elderberries and chard. Brian’s wife, Jan, 61, is there, still in her Asda uniform. She has been up since 4am, cleaning the tills with her daughter before the shop opens. Later, she will be going off to another cleaning job at a local school, where she will stay until 6pm.
Neither Brian nor Jan is interested in growing vegetables. Their allotment has served a completely different purpose. In 2000, As a child she had watched her father breed budgies. She had then bred pigeons and whippets herself. The first time she raced her pigeons, she won a national title. All of her whippets made it to Crufts. How hard could it be? Just because she was working class and living in the valleys and cleaned the tills at Asda, why should she settle for a hobby such as bingo or darts? Why couldn’t she breed a racehorse?
To say that Jan’s vision broke a racing stereotype is something of an understatement. Not only are racehorses usually pedigree (mainly thoroughbred), born with a reliable lineage, and schooled, trained and raced by the industry’s best, but their owners are typically privileged and rich. Breeding and owning a racehorse is an expensive hobby (£15,000 a year minimum to train), and only one per cent of racehorses ever actually win a race. While Brian bought a breeding mare – Rewbell, ‘probably the worst racehorse in Wales,’ he says, ‘so mental that by the end jockeys refused to get on her’ – from a young Welsh lad for a £300, and had her sired for a knockdown price too, many of the most promising racehorses cost hundreds of thousands to buy in the first place.
But Jan Vokes did exactly what she set out to do. Rewbell’s foal, Dream Alliance (known as Dream to his owners), bred and initially raised on the Vokeses’ slag-heap allotment, became famous in the racing world and, for a short time, the world beyond – not only for winning the Welsh Grand National in December 2009 (he won a total of £137,000 in prize money during his 30-race career), but also because of his extremely unlikely and humble beginnings combined with his extremely unlikely and humble owners.
The story of how Brian and Jan Vokes and their friend Howard Davies broke the mould of racehorse owners (with their 23-strong racing syndicate formed in the Cefn Fforest working men’s club – breed a horse to get on a course. £10 a week. see jan behind the bar, the initial sign read) is not a new one. And yet a documentary film, Dark Horse, released this month, proves its enduring appeal. The documentary has already won the Audience Award at the Sundance Film Festival.
Directed by Louise Osmond, the film shows how Dream Alliance’s success goes way beyond the relatively small world of horse racing. ‘It was moving, it was funny and it had this great narrative arc,’ Osmond says. ‘The film is not really about racing. It just happens to be in the racing world. What I saw as Jan’s defining quality was that she had no self-doubt, that she didn’t see obstacles like the expense or the snobbery of people thinking she had no right to be there. It is so refreshing. I’m sure she could be running some major corporation, but, in a funny way, she does her jobs to allow her to live this other life, this world with her animals where she feels completely herself.’
Perhaps, above all, the cinematic retelling of the story demonstrates that when human determination, self-belief and hard work are combined, anything is possible; class barriers collapse, be they for horse or human. ‘Dream and us, we were like kindred spirits,’ Jan explains. ‘No matter what people said, I never thought for one minute that Dream wouldn’t win. I researched it, I put a lot of thought into it. If I have a goal, then I am going to achieve it. Why should Dream’s background have made any difference? It would be just like saying the children of working-class people can’t achieve. If anybody tells me my grandson, a grade-A student, can’t go to Cambridge, they’ll have me to answer to.’
Jan Vokes had got the idea of breeding a racehorse after overhearing Howard Davies in the bar of the working men’s club where she worked, talking about once running a syndicate for another racehorse. That experience had cost him money and he had promised his wife, Angela, never to do it again. But Jan’s interest had been piqued, and she had gone home and said to Brian, ‘I want to breed a racehorse.’ ‘What do you want with a ruddy racehorse?’ Brian had replied, although he had always kept horses, having once been a rag-and-bone man. (He had been pulling a cart of manure when he first met Jan, when she was 15.)
‘Good luck with that!’ Howard, a tax adviser, had said with a laugh, when she told him of her plan. But the next time he saw her in the club she surprised him by saying she had bought a mare (Rewbell, the £300 ‘nightmare’), plus a Directory of the Turf to locate a stallion, and would he run a syndicate for them? Jan had thrown down the gauntlet and Howard, a lifelong racing fan, couldn’t resist.
At the time, Howard remembers working it out and thinking, ‘A tenner a week, 30 people, £300 a week, £15,000 a year’, with the understanding that Jan would keep the horse if it all went wrong. So they got going, recruiting locals such as pensioner Maureen Jones (‘I know nothing about horses! Nothing!’) and Tony Kerby (‘One helluva boy’, according to Brian). Tony is seen in the film, stripped to the waist, twirling his T-shirt above his head during a particularly exciting race. Nobody went into the venture to make money, but rather to buy into a collective vision.
Dream Alliance was born on March 23 2001, and stayed on the allotment for 12 months, before moving to stables in Hereford ‘to teach him his manners’, as Jan puts it. In April 2004, aged three, he was accepted by Philip Hobbs, one of Britain’s top racehorse trainers, into his yard: Sandhill Racing Stables near Minehead, set in 500 acres of land owned by the Crown Estate. ‘It’s like the Riviera down there!’ Jan exclaimed when she saw it. ‘Dream won’t know he’s born.’
• Dream Alliance: From slag heap allotment to Grand National Hopeful
Eighteen months earlier Jan and Brian had turned up at one of Philip Hobbs’s open days. Brian was on sticks, overweight and with no front teeth (‘I keep them in a jar but they’ve gone green’), adorned by his many tattoos and rings. He had got out of the car and asked a member of staff, ‘Is the governor about? I’m here for the trainee jockey’s job.’ This playful, self-mocking approach set the tone immediately.
As Louise Osmond explains, ‘They all have a really well developed sense of mischief, and something else too – this idea that they could try to do something that nobody else thought was possible. It was an escape for them all.’
Osmond discovered the story after she went racing one Christmas and was struck by the beauty of the animals and the amount of cash flying around in a time of recession. Her interest was piqued. She started looking into syndicates as a potential idea for a film, and then found the relatively few press cuttings about Dream back in the day, a story so much richer than her original idea. ‘I really couldn’t believe it,’ she remembers. ‘It had been in the papers but somehow it had stayed under the radar.’ Sick with nerves and worried the owners would all say no, she asked her producer to make the initial call. The general response was characteristically uncomplicated. ‘Why not? Let’s give it a go,’ they said.
Osmond says that as the story emerged, exposing layer upon layer of meaning, both emotional and symbolic, she could hardly believe her luck. ‘And then when we met them, they were just fantastically honest and able to express their feelings.’
Still, Johnson White, Hobbs’s assistant trainer, remembers assuming – rather snobbishly, he admits now – that they had just come for a nose round the yard while on holiday at nearby Butlins. ‘Let’s just say they don’t look like your usual racehorse owner,’ he says. Quite apart from the question of their allotment horse being up to scratch (‘If he had gone to the sales at that point, as a three-year-old, with his background and breeding, he’d have made no money at all,’ White states), there was the not insignificant issue of Hobbs’s fee: £315 plus VAT a week, £18,000 for 12 months. But in the summer of 2004 Brian, Jan and Howard were back at the yard, the syndicate having now saved enough to give Dream Alliance a proper start. ‘From the first time Jan looked at him, she’d said to me, “He’s going to win me a gold cup,” ’ Brian says.
Hobbs had agreed to look at Dream Alliance only because it was Sandhill’s quietest period of the year. He saw something in the horse that convinced him to take him on. White describes Dream Alliance’s arrival as being like ‘the snotty-nosed little comp boy turning up at Eton with his handkerchief hanging out of his pocket, not knowing anything about the world or what was going on around him. A lot of the horses he was with were worth hundreds of thousands of pounds, and here was this horse from an allotment.
‘But he had a fantastic attitude from the start,’ White continues, ‘and a very willing and straightforward nature to learn and to take on whatever we were asking of him. There was absolutely no way you could dislike him. He was so eager to please.’
But while Dream Alliance was willing, he wasn’t setting the world alight in terms of speed. Hobbs and his team decided they would give him a debut run at Newbury on November 10, to see how he fared. The syndicate drove to the racecourse in a hired minibus. Tony Kerby had his packed lunch and lagers in a Tesco bag because he didn’t want to be ripped off paying £6 for a burger. ‘If Dream had come 10th, we’d have been very happy,’ Jan remembers. He came fourth. They were over the moon.
Although Jan says in the documentary that part of the attraction of owning a racehorse was in trying to break into an exclusively upper-class sport, in reality, she, Brian and Howard are quick to point out that they have made many unlikely friends. One of Jan’s favourite new acquaintances, she tells me, owns 25 racehorses. The snobbery on that first race day at Newbury came from the staff on the gates, one of whom tried to take Tony’s lagers away from him until he realised he was an owner. Once in the owners’ and trainers’ enclosure, each with their owner badge pinned to their lapels, the syndicate members had a knees-up, the beers flowing. Brian remembers screaming at Dream Alliance during his race, and being told to shut up. ‘Shut up?’ he retorted. ‘That’s my bloody horse out there!’
Other successes followed for Dream Alliance: second at Cheltenham on his next outing; third at Newbury; then he won his fourth race, at Chepstow over hurdles in January 2006. ‘From the minute that horse started racing, he began making money,’ Brian says. ‘Although for us it was nothing to do with the money. It was the horse.’
‘But then he suddenly went into the wilderness,’ Johnson White remembers. ‘It was as if he didn’t want to try.’
Nobody knew what went wrong. There were murmurings of a bad back, although Jan now attributes it to Dream being ‘a valley boy, a jack-the-lad, not always to be trusted’. People in Cefn Fforest started taunting Brian. ‘When’s that donkey running next?’ they would shout. They nicknamed Dream ‘Sick Note’. People stopped betting on him.
But it was as if Dream himself heard it all, as if he knew the grief Brian, Howard and Jan were getting on his behalf. And he started winning again: the Perth Gold Cup in April 2007; a brilliant second in the Hennessy Gold Cup at Newbury in December 2007 behind Denman (who went on to win the big one, the Cheltenham Gold Cup, the following year). He was suddenly a horse to contend with, his insurance value £180,000. ‘It is extraordinary,’ White says. ‘It is only when you sit down and think about where it all started, and put it into perspective…’
Philip Hobbs decided to run him at the Aintree Festival in 2008, in a handicap hurdle race before the Grand National. It was the only race in Dream Alliance’s career that the Vokeses missed – Rewbell had died while foaling the night before. They watched at home. Dark Horse replays the live tele­vision coverage: mid-race, suddenly staggering, Dream was pulled up. A helicopter circled above.
A screen was put round him. ‘They are going to shoot him,’ Brian told a sobbing Jan.
Dream’s legs had concertinaed, and a rear hoof had cut through the back of his front leg, slicing a tendon, an injury so severe that most horses would have been put down on the course. The quick thinking of his jockey that day, Richard Johnson, saved his life. By dismounting immediately and holding the horse upright and very still he prevented the tendon tearing completely and irreparably. Dream’s laidback nature and intelligence stopped him from resisting or panicking.
‘Don’t put the horse down,’ Howard Davies told the vets. ‘It’s more than a racehorse. It’s a pet.’
Dream was taken to the Royal Veterinary College in Liverpool. The syndicate was presented with an option: £20,000-worth of stem-cell surgery might help the leg recover. It was highly improbable that Dream would race again, let alone win, even with the operation.
While nobody cared about Dream Alliance racing again, the vote was unanimous. Dream had earned more than enough in prize money to pay for his own surgery and rehabilitation. ‘He was one of us,’ Maureen Jones explains. ‘Certainly a more commercial owner would have chosen a different route,’ White notes.
Recuperation started just at the time when Jan’s life became extremely difficult. Her father had died the month before and her mother was very ill, needing Jan’s care, on top of all her other cleaning jobs. Visiting Dream and watching him slowly improve week by week gave her some light in her life. ‘I felt like somebody else when I was with him,’ she says. ‘Not Jan the cleaner but Jan the racehorse owner. Everything else was forgotten.’
By July 2009, with 15 months of rehabilitation behind him, Dream was back on good form, once again astounding his trainers. Watching him on the gallops at Sandhill, Brian swore he saw the horse wink at him. By the end of the year, after only one race since his recovery, Philip Hobbs was confident enough to enter Dream for the Welsh Grand National at Chepstow in December. The odds were long: 60-1 at Coral. Just before the race, Hobbs said to Brian and Jan, ‘All I can say to you today is that your horse is going to make a real fist of this.’
Dream Alliance won. ‘He paid his owners’ faith back in one go!’ ran the television commentary. To this day, he remains one of only a few horses ever to win a race after stem-cell surgery. 'FROM NAGS TO RICHES' screamed the headlines. Sick Note was a winner. Brian was permanently at the allotment showing television crews the muddy patch where Dream’s racing life had started. People would applaud Jan as she walked through the aisles of Asda. ‘And it gives everybody hope,’ says White, who despite his early professional composure and emotional distance from Dream breaks down in the film remembering that win, ‘because it proves that you don’t have to spend £200,000 to have a racehorse, that you can do it at grass-roots level.’
Today Dream Alliance lives in Somerset with the stable girl from Hobbs’s yard who was chiefly responsible for his care. He still likes posing for the camera. He even has his own Facebook page. There is interest from Hollywood in a feature-length film.
Dream attempted the Grand National in April 2010 at Aintree, the scene of his earlier accident from which he recovered so spectacularly, but was pulled up seven fences out. It was later discovered that he suffered from a lung condition. He raced a few more times, but was never placed again, and in 2012 the syndicate voted to end his career. Of the £137,000 he won in prize money, after his surgery and training fees, the 23 syndicate members who stayed the course got back £1,430 each, none of them richer materially, but each one so much richer in a more profound way. ‘We actually went there and did it. It’s elating when you can do something when nobody gives you a chance,’ Howard says.
While Jan always thought Dream would return to the allotment where he started in utero, it was decided by the syndicate to send him to Somerset where he could be regularly ridden and hunted. She was heartbroken.
But now Jan and Brian and Howard are doing it again. As we walk around the allotment, Jan takes me to the stable where Dream first lived, and shows me another stable in a different field, ready for a new occupant. The mare I see today is nicknamed Hettie, and as you read this, she will be about to have her foal. This time, thanks to its lineage (Hettie is a much safer bet than the mad Rewbell, and Jan, of course, has picked her stallion carefully), the new foal will, to quote Jan, ‘be bred in the purple’. In other words, it will be a lot posher than Dream.
There is a new 20-person syndicate in place – £15 per week, which works out at £780 per person a year – run once again by Howard with the express aim of building up a good nest egg ready for when – or if – the training bills start rolling in. A few of the old syndicate members from Cfen Fforest are back again for a second shot, but this time there are also grander people, racing friends the Vokeses and Howard have made along the way.
It will be three years before Philip Hobbs will check out the new horse. But, as Jan says at the end of Dark Horse, ‘I will have a Gold Cup in my cupboard if it’s the last thing I do. This isn’t the end.’ No pressure then.
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chvrchesrp · 7 years
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Welcome to CHVRCHES’ seventh event!
The Centennial Ball is our second choice event, in which we set a scene and split your characters up into groups dependent on how many points you’ve acquired so far. Once in that setting, you can create threads as you see fit for your muse. The settings and information shared in this post are considered game canon, whether or not you explore it deeply. While this event will have its own shocker of an ending, during the first part, we want to let you guys explore the ball and have some fun.
The date stamp for the event is Saturday, March 25th. Be sure to include that in your posts for timeline purposes—though you aren’t restricted to beginning them the 25th, of course—you can even begin them today ♥ Long post ahead:
The night blooms with possibility. The columns beckon you in, as if you were always meant to be among the shining throng of those blessed with prosperity and good fortune. The air smells of sandalwood and a hint of jasmine, just enough to tantalize the senses, but exceedingly subtle. The windows are draped in expensive fineries: promise and nostalgia. The mansion normally calls to mind many things, but tonight, it feels literally like walking into a dream, another world, a parallel universe where anything can happen—and might. You retain control but everything around you feels... gorgeous and precious and fleeting, where anything can be yours reach out to touch it. Indeed, everything here is meant to be touched, tasted, enjoyed. It is a party big enough to be intimate: privacy among all of the moving bodies, nobody listening too closely—a party meant for masks, for indulging in your innermost desires and curiosities, with no one the judge or jury. It's freedom—for a night. 
What do you do with it?
"In his blue gardens men and girls came and went like moths among the whisperings and the champagne and the stars..."
When you enter the entryway, you take in the setting: the stairs that wind themselves upward on either side, the glass doors straight through that open onto the veranda and the salt water pools beyond. There are fireplaces and corridors, but you've been instructed, just for now, to wait. That the waiting makes everything sweeter, the anticipation, the curiosity for the unknown almost so tantalizingly knowable. You were given a loose blindfold to tie over your mask when you entered, told you would know when to use it. The music is alive around you; there is a balcony with the sounds of a live band playing electroswing, the perfect mix of modern dance and 1920s memories. Caro Emerald croons into a dated looking microphone, her hair as perfect as her smile, singing A Night Like This. Slowly, two silhouettes make themselves known at the top and center of the stairs.
Front and center is Renee Thornton, Vice of the Church of Sinners, here in all her regalia to present the evening at its finest. Her black gossamer dress is adorned with swarovski detailing, setting her to shimmer like a dark jewel in the center of the pale hall. Behind her stands Lucifer, his arm out with hers regally on top of it, as a proper escort. His suit is finely tailored, but understated. There are hints of gold in the cufflinks, the tie bar, but overall he is a man whose suit is class. He smiles brightly at the crowd as Renee gives a welcoming speech, speaking with pride about the hundred years the Church has been active, has grown to one of the three largest in the world. Only when she is done, do the two share the first dance. Then Renee invites everyone to put on their blindfolds; each person is led into a room, thereafter able to remove their blindfold and experience the evening.
Six people are left in the entryway:
Babylon, Maria, Magda, Elijah, Adele, and Renee.
As the people with the highest amount of points (14 apiece), these muses are free to roam about the cabin, as it were. They can go to whatever room intrigues them: the choice is theirs and theirs alone. The one offer they are given is this: For the price of 24 points total, one person can make a request of Lucifer with no strings attached. (Think of it like the Godfather on the wedding day.) The caveat is that it must be a defined favour, not one to be owed at a future date. Determine which person should ask it of him, who contributes which points, and what should be asked for.
Special Notes: Elijah will willingly sell his soul tonight. 
The rest are moved into one of 7 rooms upstairs: (There are 3 people per room; we ask you try to thread with each person, if possible, so 2 threads per player—try to use this as an exercise to engage in ways they might not usually, given the scenario, and branch out who you write with, if the scene doesn’t come naturally. You won’t be held to this, but we would encourage it! After you do at least one thread start in your room, you can move to other rooms to do as you will.)
Evening Notes: Do not drink more than one bottle without discussing with Admins first (some effects clash!), so choose your first bottle carefully! The effects will only last for the night.
ENVY
Leviathan (0), Shibah (1), Abaddon (3)
This room is an octagon. Once inside, it appears as though there is no way out of it. Each wall is a 2-way mirror, so while those on the outside can't see in, everyone inside of it can see out. One wall shows the pale hall, but all of the others show glimpses of the other rooms that everyone else can enjoy—but all you can do is watch, and envy, and figure out how to open the door without a handle. The room is empty apart from a small glass table with legs in the shape of snakes, not unlike the feel of Alice in Wonderland, with a series of stoppered bottles on it. Some are pearlescent and shimmery, marked with "trip" - others are gold and sparkling, marked "fortuna." If your muse elects to drink one, let an Admin know so you know what surprises are in store...
WRATH
Cassiel (3), Olivia (4), Donato (7)
Special Notes: Tonight, Lucifer has released his grasp from Olivia. She will feel better than she has since she can remember—not only is she no longer sick, she’s no longer possessed. The weight in her chest, the pressure behind her eyes, and all of those things have suddenly disappeared on entry.
This room has a taxidermied lion in it, appearing to weep diamonds, at the center. Beside it is a small table with stoppered bottles on it: some are a deep, fiery red that looks viscous, marked “furia” and the others are a pale, translucent gold with red flecks, marked “invicta.” If your muse elects to drink one, let an Admin know so you know what surprises are in store... Elsewhere in the room, there are things that cause and accept damage. An expensive looking couch and a chainsaw; a baseball bat and a computer; a fine china cabinet near a wall covered in small spikes; other things of this nature. Also found, for those feeling a bit—darker—is a ‘confessional’ behind a curtain, where a cat o’nine and paddles and whips and a ball gag could be found.
GREED
Noah (7), Satan (7), Grace (7)
This room’s wallpaper is damask, but the subtle pattern in it is that of a toad watching over all of the festivities. The room is a miniature casino; a dealer is at the ready with high-stakes blackjack. There’s a roulette wheel asking you to name your wager: anything but money. There’s a slot machine where the prize—should you be so lucky as to win—is a LaFerrari Aperta. Drinks are freely offered, champagne and rocks glasses move throughout the space, and among those glasses—if you can spot one—are small, stoppered bottles. A few are pearlescent and purple, marked “lotus,” others are marked “streak” and are as green as money, swirled with pale notes of tan. If your muse elects to drink one, let an Admin know so you know what surprises are in store... 
SLOTH
Naomi (7), Dominic (9), Kezia (9)
This room plays to the dreamscape. The windows are open, the sheer curtains billow like clouds, the entire floor is plush and soft. The ceiling is painted like the night sky. There are soft blankets, a loveseat draped in suede, a fainting couch for reclining. Soothing sounds play the ocean lapping at the tides. There is a sand box—yes, a literal sand box—in one corner to enjoy playing in, or just running your hands through the grains and relaxing. There is a masseuse offering hand and foot rubs, and another person available to feed you grapes. There is a small cabinet with a snail-shaped latch against a wall that houses some stopped bottles: some are aqua and glittery, marked “lucid,” others are swirly seafoam coloured, marked “tranquil.” If your muse elects to drink one, let an Admin know so you know what surprises are in store... 
LUST
Ethan (10), Isadora (10), Zoe (10)
Of course there’s a bed, of course there is, and it’s round on every side except for the headboard, which is intricately carved mahogany with a scene of a goat grazing. The entire room is, in effect, a master bedroom—there’s the bed, yes, but also a fireplace and a beautiful crystal chandelier. There’s a small banquet by the window of aphrodisiacs: a chocolate fountain with bananas and strawberries; oysters and artichokes; figs and honey. There’s a table laid out with items to experience sensuality: a feather teaser, rose petals, whipped cream, body dust, reams of soft rope, massage oils, swathes of satin and faux fur. The armoire has lingerie and other attire inside of it of a wide variety. And of course, there’s the milk bath in the ornate claw-foot tub. Around the tub are small stoppered bottles, one hot pink and thick, marked “rouge,” and another “adora,” which is syrupy and red. If your muse elects to drink one, let an Admin know so you know what surprises are in store... 
GLUTTONY
Raziel (11), Jairus (11), Crowley (11)
This room actually has an alive, small piglet in it for your company and enjoyment. Please don’t hurt her, her name is Maenad, but by all means pet her. The room is its own banquet hall; the center and import of the room is a long, carefully carved and imported table upon which a black silk cloth is laid, so that the food stands out upon it. Not only is there an endless array of all kinds of sumptuous foods—anything you could want—it’s all taken great care to look as good as it tastes. Plating is superb and each dish that holds food was chosen with care, with its own luxuries. The seats are so comfortable, you may never want to get up. There are two people, naked, who are hired as waiters—but who have also consented to let you eat off of them, if you desire. They each hold a tray with stoppered bottles: one sort is pure white, like milk, with small red flecks and marked “snow,” another is mixed gold glitter in syrupy berry coloured liquid, marked “harvest.” If your muse elects to drink one, let an Admin know so you know what surprises are in store... 
PRIDE
Belial (12), Kiara (12), Isaiah (13)
Pride is an old-style smoking lounge of the early 1900s. It doesn’t smell because it’s incredibly well ventilated; inside are soft leather chairs, velvet curtains, and a small Turkish antique weapons collection. Smoking jackets are available for any who might enjoy to don them. There is a wall dedicated to expensive wines and the glasses that go with them to accordingly enjoy, as well as after-dinner drinks like brandies and cognacs. Of course, a wide variety of cigars are available to try, as well as hookahs in a range of flavours and bases. There are rare pieces of art on the walls and all the marks of those who have lived life well. The centerpiece around which the art is displayed is an arrangement of peacock feathers. In this room, there is an intercom, and anything reasonable will be delivered to you on request. The stoppered bottles in this room are pure gold, marked “prima,” or like black ink, marked “securitas.” If your muse elects to drink one, let an Admin know so you know what surprises are in store... 
At 2am, a shock moves through the mansion. Details on why will be revealed to you on Sunday. Enjoy!
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kennethherrerablog · 4 years
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70+ Ways to Get Money When You Need Money Now
  Are you here because you are saying to yourself, “I need money now and don’t know what to do”?
We all know nobody has a money tree in their backyard that grows dollar bills you can pick on-demand. However, you can still get money right now if you’re dealing with an unexpected bill, home repair, medical expense, or whatever it may be that is causing you to scramble for a quick money WITHOUT having to borrow it.
With a little hustle and creativity, you can begin implementing these ideas today to quickly increase your cash flow.
Believe me, my wife and I have had to raise cash quickly without paying late fees or borrowing money. Even if you have enough money in your emergency fund to cover a surprise expense, you can quickly replenish your balance with these earning hacks as well.
I Need Money Now – Earning Online
The good news is if you really need money right now, you can get money right now. Whether you want to make money from home, from an app on your phone or you’re willing to put your skills to work, here are some great ways to start earning income today.
1. Trade In Your Cell Phone and Put $475 in Your Pocket
Buyback Boss is who I continue to use whenever we upgrade to a new phone because they guarantee the most money for your phone and they send same-day payments via check or PayPal.
If you have an old phone in a drawer somewhere, why not sell it today and get paid ASAP? Think of that old phone as cash sitting in your drawer that you need right now.
You can also downgrade to last year’s model (often getting the phone for a few dollars with a new contract) and sell your current phone for up to $475. Here’s a screenshot I snapped of the latest offer I received on my current used phone (iPhone X) in good condition.
  2. Get Money Sent to Your PayPal For Your Opinion
Survey Junkie is a great place to start because cash can be deposited into your PayPal account, or you can get paid out via Amazon or Target gift cards for simply giving you opinion online.
We also have a full list of all different types of survey companies who are looking to pay people for their opinions on different products and brands. You can see the full list of the top survey companies here.
Our Top Pick: Survey Junkie has been around since 2005 and is the most trusted in the survey industry with a Trustpilot Rating of 4.4/5.
You can start making money today by checking out Survey Junkie here.
  3. Get Paid to Play Games
Yes, you can actually get paid to play games.
Mistplay is one of the very best places to get started.
The reason is online game creators need to have their games tested by real people before they launch it out to the market. 
For testing out their games on you mobile device, apps like Mistplay will pay via credits. These credits can then be cashed out in the form of different gift cards, including Visa or Amazon gift cards.
We also put together a full list of places that will pay you to play games here.
4. Teach English Online
Teaching English online to international students can be the perfect side hustle opportunity if you want to work before your children wake up or after bedtime. VIPKid is one of the leading online classrooms. To get started, you need a webcam, microphone, and a love for teaching.
Most of these online teaching sites require you to have a teaching degree or prior classroom experience.
5. Save Money and Make Money with the Honey App
The Honey App will search every online coupon for you and apply the best promo code at your checkout for free. This is the first way to save money.
Also, for every 2 people you refer to Honey, they will pay you $10 in the form of popular gift cards like Amazon, Walmart and Target.
By reducing how much you spend, you won’t have to earn as much money from these side hustles. Honey makes it easy to save money when you shop online by automatically applying every known discount code to your order when you checkout.
If you shop at Amazon, Honey also compares the prices of third-party sellers to the current Amazon price to quickly spot the lowest price so you pay less for the exact same product.
With no additional effort, Honey saves you money on products you are going to purchase regardless. Now, make sure you put your savings to good use!
You can also learn about the triple savings hack with honey here.
6. Complete Mini-Online Tasks
Swagbucks is the best place to start when for getting paid to complete tasks such as reading emails, surfing the web, playing games, shopping online and using mobile apps to name a few.
BONUS: One thing I really like about Swagbucks is the option to donate to one of the many charities they work with.
Our Top Pick: The most widely known company is Swagbucks, with a Trust Pilot Rating of 4.3/5..
With Swagbucks, you earn swagbucks that can be redeemed for cash via your PayPal or through gift cards to places like Walmart, Amazon, Express, or even Bass Pro Shops.
  7. Get a quick $10 with Ebates (now called Rakuten)
Ebates sends you cash via PayPal for shopping online or in stories at places you already normally shop.
Let’s be clear, unnecessary shopping is one of the last activities you need to do if you need to get money fast, but that doesn’t mean you can’t be a smart shopper for those unavoidable purchases. My wife and I shop with Ebates and get up to 40% cash back on nearly every online purchase.
Ebates cashback arrives once a quarter via PayPal or mailed check and you can get a bonus by referring your friends to shop with Ebates too. Using Ebates is like getting paid to shop.
Also, you can get a free $10 when you create an account with eBates today.
8. Freelance Online with Fiverr
Freelancing online with Fiverr is another great way to make money online. With Fiverr, you use your talents online without performing manual labor. Here are some of the possible gigs you can perform:
Writing blog posts
Graphic design
Website design
Creating YouTube videos
Translation
Proofreading
Voice Over
Jingles, sound effects, and songs
Similar to Fiverr, Upwork is another great platform for aspiring freelancers.
I have been freelancing online for the past two years and it’s been an excellent source of supplemental income because you can truly work from anywhere in the world with an internet connection and get paid.
9. Proofread
If you have an eye for detail and can spot typos from a mile away when you read the news or visit a restaurant, you might find your calling as a proofreader. Several proofreading companies require prior experience, but you can also get your foot in the door at Cactus Communications or freelancer platforms including Upwork and Fiverr.
If you are looking to perfect your craft as a proofreader and earn more money, look into Caitlin Pyle’s Proofread Anywhere program.
10. Create an Online Course
With Udemy, you can create a video course to teach others something you’re an expert in. Your video can be teaching computer coding, cooking skills, making a craft, or anything else in the Udemy course catalog. You collect a royalty for each course purchase and you can easily create new courses to continue earning residual income.
11. Transcribe Audio Recordings
Do you excel at dictation? Audio transcriptionists put sound recordings to paper. With sites like TranscribeMe, you transcribe one or two-minute recordings on a variety of topics. If you have medical or legal experience, you can make extra money transcribing these recordings that require a professional background.
12. Lucktastic
Lucktastic can give you a break from your other side hustles. This app is an instant win game where you can scratch multiple tickets each day and potentially win cash prizes. If you need money now, you should still pursue other recommendations that provide a guaranteed income first.
13. Test Websites and Apps
Another fun way to make money online is testing websites and apps. UserTesting is one of the most popular testing platforms. Each test takes up to twenty minutes to complete and you make $10. At that rate, you make $30 an hour for testing websites!
To become a tester, you will need a computer or app that has a functioning webcam and microphone. You are given a series of tasks to complete during the test and you verbally share your thoughts as you complete each task.
14. Sell Unwanted Gift Cards
Sometimes, you don’t have to work to make money because you already have it in unwanted gift cards. Instead of letting your gift cards collect dust, sell them on Gift Card Granny.
You can sell your unused and partially used gift cards quickly with three different selling options:
Sell It Now
Name Your Price
Trade In
Gift Card Granny finds the best price on the top gift card marketplaces and you get paid almost instantly when a sale is made.
I have sold several gift cards online almost always within 24 hours of posting and payment is sent via PayPal within three business days. Selling gift cards is one of the quickest ways to get money fast because of the quick turnaround.
15. Sell Unused Clothing
As your fashion tastes change or your children grow older, you might find yourself with a closet full of clothes you’ll never wear again. While you can sell them at a yard sale or local consignment shop, you might also consider selling online at thredUP for men’s, women’s, and children’s clothing.
For designer clothing you wish to keep but don’t plan to wear in the near future, Rent the Runway lets you rent your high-end articles for up to one month at a time.
Finally, my wife has also had success selling on eBay and Poshmark. To increase the odds of selling your items, make sure to take plenty of pictures and consider wearing them or putting them on a mannequin so the buyer can visualize how the item fits.
16. Sell Your Old Books
You can also make a quick buck by selling your used books and textbooks that you’ll no longer read. Selling our old books is another way we boost our income each year and you can start with these three sites:
Amazon Marketplace
Cash4Books
Bookscouter (Textbooks only)
Selling is easy as you only have to enter the ISBN to receive an instant quote from Cash4Books and Bookscouter. If you like the price, you ship the books for free using their prepaid shipping label and you will be paid via PayPal once your shipment arrives and is processed.
I recommend using Bookscouter for selling your textbooks as they compare the prices of 42 buyback vendors in a single search; saving you time while finding the best buyer.
17. Sell Movies, Music, and Video Games
You can also make some extra cash by selling your old DVDs, CDs, and video games with Bonavendi. With their app, you can scan barcodes and compare the prices of 28 companies including Amazon and Best Buy.
18. Sell Old Electronics
Decluttr can be the most efficient app to sell your old electronics, smartphone, and tech gadgets. The Decluttr app scans item barcodes and you receive next-day payments via PayPal and direct deposit once Decluttr receives your shipment. College students can also receive a 10% bonus payment to earn a little extra cash.
Make Money With Your Car or House
Most of us have either a car or a house and which means you can put each of them to work for you to make money. Here are a few of my favorites when it comes to having your car or house go to work for you!
19. Deliver Food, Drinks and Groceries to People
Have you heard of Postmates?
Postmates is a service where people can order food, drinks and groceries and have them available for delivery or pickup. The people who provide that service and get paid, are people just like yourself.
Postmates states that experienced couriers can earn up to $25 an hour and work on their own hours.
However, if you only want to deliver groceries to people, then you should also sign up for Instacart.
Instacart pays people quickly to deliver groceries from grocery store to their clients doorstep. Currently, people working with Instacart are making anywhere from $50 – $1,000 per month as a side hustle.
20. Become an Uber Driver
Uber is a great option if you have a car and like interacting with people. There are two additional reasons to consider driving for Uber:
Flexible hours
Weekly pay
Signup incentive for new drivers
Another reason to consider Uber is for their schedule flexibility; you drive when you have time and aren’t beholden to a specific shift or having to be available at least X hours a week.
You can find more information here to determine if driving with Uber is right for you.
21.  Deliver for Uber Eats
Uber Eats allows you earn on your own schedule by delivering food from restaurants to people.
The best thing about Uber Eats is you get to choose your wheels based on the city you live in. Depending on your city, you can deliver for Uber Eats via your car, bike or scooter. Just turn on the app in the morning before work, when you get home, or whenever you have some extra time to make money on your terms.
Also, the driver qualifications are less stringent for Uber Eats. In case you don’t meet the age and vehicle requirements to be a full-fledged Uber driver, you can be an Uber Eats driver until then.
22. Become an Airbnb Host
Become and Airbnb Host and you can start making really good income each month. There are many of benefits to being a homeowner, including the option to rent out your unused rooms for cash. But, by becoming an Airbnb host, travelers stay in your spare bedroom, basement, or second house.
Real estate is one time-tested approach to earning passive income and Airbnb can be less stressful than being a full-time landlord or trying to fix and flip houses for a profit. And, you get to interact with visitors coming from all corners of the world!
23. Rent Out Your Car
If you don’t drive your car every day or have the time to be an Uber driver, you can make some extra cash by renting your car on Turo. You can earn approximately $541 a month ($6,501 a year) when your car is worth $20,000 and it’s borrowed 15 days a month. This income can easily cover your monthly insurance premium and car payment.
Considering most cars are depreciating assets that lose value every day and cost money to maintain, renting your car on Turo is one of the very few ways your car can actually make money for you.
You will receive payment within five days after a rental period ends.
24. Rent Your Spare Bedroom
You can also make money by listing your spare bedroom or a second house as an Airbnb host. An increasing number of travelers prefer staying at Airbnb because it’s typically more reasonable than most hotel rooms and it’s a more enjoyable experience. Airbnb will help you through the listing process so you can begin taking guests and putting your vacant real estate to good use.
  Make Money Locally 
You should also consider making money within your local community. After all, not everybody wants to stare at a computer screen to make extra income. If you enjoy being on the move or have handy skills there are plenty of ways to have a gig without working a regular shift.
Also, ask your friends and family if they have any potential clients. Word of mouth referral is always one of the most effective forms of advertising.
25. Get Cashback on Grocery Purchases
Each time you shop at grocery stores, you can get cashback with iBotta or Checkout51 . By activating offers and scanning your receipts, both of these apps gives you a cash reward for every redeemed offer. These cash rewards are in addition to any paper coupons you might clip, and you can potentially double your savings.
Checkout51 publishes their newest offers every Thursday. Once your account balance reaches $20, you can request a cash payment.
26. Become a TaskRabbit
There are people who need simple tasks completed but simply don’t have the time. Whether it’s putting together furniture from iKea, delivering a dresser across town, or trimming some overgrown bushes in the backyard – people will hire you.
Here are the top three places to find work using your phone:
TaskRabbit
OfferUp
Facebook Marketplace
Simply create a bio about yourself and then start looking for the task requests to pour in. I personally can tell you I utilize one of these three apps a week to find someone to do tasks for me!
27. Sell Locally on Craigslist
Bulky items aren’t cost-effective to sell online because they cost too much to ship. When that’s the case, sell locally with Craigslist or another app to sell locally. We periodically sell our unwanted items during the year and pocket 100% profit because it’s free to sell on these apps.
Beyond Craigslist, there are also dozens of other similar websites where you can sell your stuff locally as well.
28. Scan Grocery Receipts and Get $10
Earlier we told you ways to make money delivering through places like Postmates, Instacart and Uber Eats. However, there is still other money to be made by simply scanning grocery receipts.
Scanning grocery receipts for money is a real thing and there are over 20 apps that allow you to get started. While some are better than others, we recommend starting with the most popular receipts scanning app, Ibotta.
Our Top Pick: We like Ibotta because you can redeem digital offers plus your regular coupons for many food items at most supermarkets and even discount stores like Walmart and Target, and you also get a $10 sign-up bonus. When your rewards balance reaches $20, you can request PayPal payment or a gift card.
  29. Recycle Scrap Material
It’s also possible to make money recycling scrap material for cash. You can get cash for some of the following items you might have in your house:
Loose metal (i.e., sheet metal, copper, tire rims)
Appliances
Metal cans
Glass bottles
For larger objects like your old washer and dryer, you will need a truck and trailer to haul your scrap off. You can look online for scrap yards and recycle-for-cash facilities near you.
30. Picking Up Dog Poop
You can also make money picking up dog poop when you don’t have the time to walk dogs or pet sit. Why? Because it only takes a few minutes to clean up a backyard compared to keeping a pet for several hours.
One man operates a full-time business picking up dog poop for a premium in the Phoenix area. You can scroll down to #73 on this side hustle list to see a video of how he turned dog poop into a full-time income.
31. Sell Used Furniture
Did you recently upgrade your living room or dining room set? If there’s still some life in your old furniture collection, get a few bucks for it. Craigslist or letgo can be your best friend to attract college students and young couples that only need something affordable, but Trove Market is another option for more valuable pieces.
32. Sell Your Car
Another way to raise cash quickly is to sell a car you no longer need. Even if you need to sell your fancy ride and drive a clunker instead, how else can you access $10,000+ instantly.
I sold my $20,000 sports car and now drive a very reliable $4,000 vehicle instead. Although I don’t turn as many heads as before, the $16,000 in cash proceeds was split between our savings and an extra house payment.
33. Have a Yard Sale
Decluttering helps you discover a small fortune sitting underneath your roof. The only problem is that you must sell your stuff to get cash. Having a yard sale is one of the quickest ways to sell most of your items in a weekend.
Coordinating your yard sale with your neighborhood sale is a good idea, but you should also post your sale on:
Craigslist
Facebook Marketplace
Your local newspaper
34. Deliver Phone Books
This job is seasonal, but it can be perfect if you only need to work for a few days. Neighborhoods all across the country still get a phone book delivered at least once a year. You can even get your daily exercise requirement in on delivery days too!
You can find local positions online to begin delivering phone books.
35. Pick Up Trash
You might find this income stream a tad bizarre, but you can make money picking up trash! Brian from Clean Lots has been doing it for thirty years and makes a six-figure income.
Business and shopping center parking lots don’t clean themselves. If you’re not afraid of getting your hands a little dirty, you can put some extra green in your wallet.
Tip: Hear Brian’s story on Episode 59 of the Money Peach Podcast.
36. Sell Your Clothes
You could do what you always do and hold a garage sale, or you can also try selling your clothes to a nearby consignment store. It’s less work and you might make more money! You can also use the same tactic for bulky household goods that are too expensive to ship to an online buyer.
Another option is to try selling your more valuable clothes online if you think you can earn more selling it yourself. Make sure you take good pictures and factor shipping prices into the equation too.
37. Flip Garage Sale Finds
One man’s trash is another man’s treasure. Some people might be selling their treasures at a discount because they need money now. By perusing garage sales and thrift stores, you can find bargains that can be sold online for a profit.
You can also scour the “Free” section on Craigslist for steals too. Once you figure out the average selling price of the items you plan to flip, shopping will be much easier and quicker.
You will need to find the system that works best for you to find treasures and the best places to sell them.
Every town has a different dynamic to find discounted items. One tip is to visit the thrift stores in the wealthier parts of your town as they are more likely to sell quality items at steep discounts. For example, you might be able to find designer clothing for a dollar that can be sold for $10 or more.
38. Wash Cars for Cash
You can offer to wash cars by hand by having a mobile car wash station or you can travel to a person’s house to wash the car. If you provide house calls or interior detailing, you need to provide your own cleaning supplies in addition to the car wash soap you use.
It’s also possible to offer exterior car waxing services to if you have the time and want to make some additional cash.
39. Pressure Wash Houses
Here’s one task that many homeowners neglect is pressure washing their home. Some people only pressure wash their homes when they get ready to sell it. You can advertise your services online or the old-fashioned way of knocking on doors.
To increase your chances of landing a job, take before and after pictures of a few homes that you pressure wash. Being able to show your clients visual examples of your quality work goes a long way.
40. Mow Lawns
You can also mow lawns and offer basic landscaping services to make money to while improving curb appeal for the homeowner.  This is a great idea to boost your income in the summer months when there’s more daylight and you’re probably outside already.
If you live in a region with significant snowfall, you can get paid during all four seasons to keep lawns and driveways in tiptop shape.
41. Clean Houses
Another way to make money any month of the year is to clean houses or places of business. You can find openings on Craigslist. For example, you might be able to clean vacation cabins on the weekends if you live near a touristy area. Or, cleaning services might also be looking for people to clean office buildings or industrial properties.
Depending on your personal network, you can also ask your friends and family if they know of anybody that needs help cleaning. Asking a simple question can help you find long-term clients or cleaning before somebody has company arrive to visit.
42. Donate Plasma
There’s a perpetual demand for plasma to treat rare, chronic diseases and you can make $400 each month by donating your plasma. Maybe this is something you or your friends did in college for some extra “weekend money.” You must be at least 110 pounds, at least 18-years-old in most states to donate and free of certain illnesses.
43. Participate in Paid Clinical Studies
Another option for making money locally is to participate in paid medical studies. You can find studies by searching for “paid medical studies near me” to find paid opportunities. You can also ask your local college or medical center if they are aware of any opportunities too.
When medical studies are available, you may have to be experiencing certain medical conditions. You will also need to be okay with being a “medical guinea pig” and testing new medications and treatment ideas.
44. Teach Lessons
All those piano lessons or karate lessons your parents paid for can finally be put to good use. You can teach a skill one night a week or multiple nights depending on how many students you have. Whether it’s music lessons, karate, gymnastics, or another talent you can teach individually or to a group, you can advertise locally to get students.
Once you decide what you can teach, you can advertise your services on Craigslist or also leave flyers at local businesses, community centers, or the public library.
45. Babysit
Parents sometimes need a break–date night— from their children and need to hire a babysitter. Besides asking for your family and friends for gigs, you can always advertise your services on Care.com.
46. Pet Sitting and Dog Walking
Animals need loving too and you can make just as much money pet sitting when their owners leave town or work long hours. Dog walking is another daily hustle opportunity as you take the dogs on their daily walk so their owner doesn’t have to.
Believe it or not, some professional dog walkers make $100,000 a year for doing something that millions of dog owners do every day for free.
Two places to begin advertising your pet sitting and dog walking services are Care and Rover.
47. Clean Houses
If you keep a clean house, put your skills to work by cleaning other people’s houses or office buildings in your spare time. Care.com can help you connect you with homeowners that don’t have the time to clean their house. Another great resource is Craigslist and looking in the “Part-Time Jobs” section.
48. Mow Lawns
When the grass is green, make money mowing lawns in your neighborhood and around town. Mowing lawns can be the perfect seasonal job if you need to make extra money in the summer when school is out or there’s more sunlight to work outside in the evenings.
49. Shovel Snow
You can also make money during the winter shoveling driveways and sidewalks. By owning a truck and plow, you can earn more keeping parking lots clean. Because snow removal is more labor-intensive than mowing a lawn, you can earn more per property than mowing (I did at least).
50. Clean Gutters and Rake Leaves
In the fall, you can also rake leaves and clean gutters before winter sets in. Once again, these are simple tasks that most homeowners simple don’t enjoy doing and offer a decent income if you enjoy working outside.
51. Pressure Wash Houses
Most houses need to be pressure washed every two or three years to maintain that “new” look. Many homeowners either don’t own a pressure washer or don’t have the time to keep their siding clean. You can advertise your services online or simply start knocking on doors to get your first clients.
52. Paint Houses
If you own a paint sprayer, can smoothly roll paint, or know how to seamlessly cut in wall edges, painting houses is another possibility. This is one task most homeowners won’t attempt on their own, especially if they aren’t a skilled painter or they are preparing to sell their house and want a professional-quality job.
53. Become a Handyman
Property management is a huge business beyond yard work, you can use your hands to help your neighbors with various home tasks with Takl or TaskRabbit including:
Home improvement
Mounting and installing new household devices
Furniture assembly
Moving and packing
54. Collect Scrap Metal
You or your family and friends might have a garage full of old household appliances. Maybe you have acquired a small scrap metal collection from your other side hustle opportunities. Regardless of how you (legally) collect your scrap, taking your ferrous and non-ferrous metal to a local scrap yard will yield an instant payment.
Some of the best ferrous and non-ferrous metals to collect are:
Aluminum
Brass
Copper
Steel
You will get the best price by bringing a single, large load compared to many small loads–even if they’re the same weight. Scrap yards have an easier time selling larger quantities to buyers and reward you with a volume bonus for making their job easier.
55. Deliver Newspapers
Newspaper routes are a steady part-time income stream if you can work in the early morning hours before your regular job or classes. If there are multiple newspaper in your town, you can also apply for a route that might deliver only a few days per week–instead of all seven– if you can’t commit to delivering papers every day of the week.
56. Deliver Phone Books
A one-time, seasonal hustle is delivering phone books five days a week. You need to be at least 18-years-old and have a driver’s license to participate. PDC is one of the largest delivery companies and they might be looking for delivery people like you.
57. Cut Firewood
Many people still heat their houses with wood in the winter or need wood for summer camping trips, but they don’t have access to their own firewood source. Or, they don’t have the time to cut their own wood. Cutting and delivering firewood is another in-demand income stream.
Make Better Decisions with the Money You Have
Whether it’s getting on a budget or learning how to manage the money you currently have, you still get a raise. In fact, the biggest raise you will ever receive in your working lifetime is not when you make more money, but when you control the money you already have.
58. Get on a Budget
Most of us don’t like the word budget because it’s so restrictive, right? We think if we are on a budget, then the result is our life goes from fun to awful in a blink of an eye.
But what if a budget was simply a plan for your money. Instead of wondering where it went at the end of each month, what if you decided where it went? What would it feel like if you were in control of your money each month?
Creating a budget is easier than you may think.
Step 1: Start a free and simple budget today.
59. Hire a Money Coach
Are you tired of trying to figure out the money all by yourself without any help? Does it feel like no matter how hard you try, you never seem to have any money left over at the end of the month.
The problem isn’t you, the problem is you were never shown what to do or how to do it.
Chris Peach teaches a live program (not an online course) called Smart Money Academy. Inside the program, Chris will show you how to create a budget you can stick to and he will even guarantee you will save $500 in the first month we work together. 
If Chris doesn’t come through on these two promises, the program is 100% free to you. If you are looking for someone to walk with you step-by-step through your financial journey and actually help you along the way, Chris Peach from SMA is the coach I highly recommend.
60. Ditch Your Permanent Life Insurance Policy
One of the worst “investments” an adult can make is buying permanent life insurance – aka Cash Value Policy. In most cases, the policy benefits are not worth the extra cost. Apply for a term life insurance policy instead that can be ten times cheaper than a permanent life insurance policy. Once you have your new term policy in place, cash out your cash value immediately!
61. Switch Bank Accounts
This hack won’t give you more spending money, but you can avoid overdraft fees, monthly account fees, and earn more interest on your deposit. In addition to thinking about short-term ways to make money, you should also pursue long-term income streams to earn recurring wealth.
Best Savings and Checking Accounts RateDetails CIT Savings Builder2.05% APR$100 monthly deposit OR $25,000 account balance CIT Money Market Account1.75% APR $100 min opening deposit UFB Direct2.00% APR$0 min to open account. $10,000 minimum to earn full 2.25% Axos Rewards Checking Account1.11% APRNo overdraft or non-sufficient fund fees, unlimited domestic ATM fee reimbursements and no minimum balance requirements
62. Refinance Your High Interest Debt
There are much better options for you instead of high interest credit card debt or any high interest debt for that matter. Borrowers are literally saving thousands of dollars in interest payments by trading their higher interest debt for a lower interest personal loan. The nice thing is you have so many more options than you did just a few years ago and with the competition for your business, your new interest rate could be much lower than what you have now.
Check our our favorite places to start for lowering your high interest debt.
63. Refinance Your Student Loans
If you have a mountain of student loans to repay, you can refinance the balance for a potentially lower interest rate. This is because you now have a job and your credit score has likely improved since you earned your diploma. Credible is a leader in student loan refinancing and they even offer job loss protection benefits and incentives for entrepreneurs too.
Immediately Cut Your Spending for an Instant Pay Raise
Are you ready to learn the secret on getting an immediate pay raise? Reduce your monthly spending.
For example, if you can spend $100 less each month than right now, you get an instant $1,200 indirect pay raise for the year. And, it might only take a few minutes to make a few quick changes to immediately begin saving money.
Besides using your free time to make money, you can also use these money hacks to instantly cut your spending. Another mantra you might take to hear is, “Spend less, work less.” By cutting your spending, maybe you don’t have to sacrifice your work/life balance to make extra money.
64. Save Your Spare Change
Maybe you’ve heard the tip of stashing all of your $1 bills in a savings envelope instead of keeping them into your wallet to spend on coffee and candy bars to easily save money for the future. The Acorns app makes it even easier to save and invest your spare change instead of spending it.
With each purchase, Acorns rounds up the purchase amount to the next dollar for every credit or debit card purchase. For example, a $4.25 purchase becomes $5 and the extra 75 cents is invested to build a small nest egg. You can also get extra cash investments by shopping online through Acorns retail partners too.
65. Stop Paying High Investing Fees
Each time you buy or sell a stock or ETF, your brokerage might charge up to $7 per trade. If you’re only investing small amounts of income at a time or are simply tired of paying hundreds of dollars in trade commissions each year M1 Finance is an option you should definitely give a look.
66. Trim Automatically Gets Rid of Your “Gray Charges”
Ask Trim makes it easy to “work smarter and not harder.”  For free, Trim monitors your spending, account balances, and can even reduce your monthly bill amount in the following categories:
Cable, cell phone, and internet
Car insurance
Unwanted subscriptions
With a single text message or Facebook Messenger request, Trim works on your behalf to find discounts on your current monthly bills or cancel the services–streaming plans including Hulu and Spotify, insurance, and gym membership– you no longer use but are still paying for.
You will realize the savings the next time you get ready to pay your bills and realize there’s more money in your bank account than usual; and you never lifted a finger.
Read our full Trim Review to learn about all of Trim’s benefits to save you money.
67. Cancel Your Cable TV Subscription
The average household cable TV bill is over $120 a month and most people only watch 20 of the 100s of channels to choose from. We dumped our cable years ago and use services like Hulu for our favorite shows with SlingTV for a total of $26/month (and no contracts).
By cutting the cord, you instantly save $100 a month on cable TV by streaming live and on-demand programming over your high-speed internet. Sling TV can be watch with any flat screen TV, computer, or mobile device.
BONUS: If you’re a fan of the 90’s TGIF shows like me, Hulu now offers Full House, Family Matters, Step by Step, Perfect Strangers and Hangin with Mr. Cooper.
68. File Price Protection Claims for Online Orders
You can already get cashback on every online purchase when you shop with a shopping app like Ebates and you can get additional cash back if the price drops after you make the purchase.
With Paribus, you can get free price protection notifications when a retailer drops the price on recent purchases. Paribus then submits the claim on your behalf, which means you don’t have to monitor for price changes yourself and then submit it.
Disclaimer: Paribus does compensate MoneyPeach when you sign up for Paribus using the links we have provided in this post. 
69. Earn Credit Card Rewards
Many people stick with debit cards because you’re still required to immediately pay for your purchases with cash. While you won’t go into credit card debt, you’re missing out on credit card rewards for cash back or travel rewards.
If you are going to use a credit card, make sure to pay them off in full so you don’t incur high interest payments. The best way to do this is to set a reminder to pay your credit cards in full once per week. If you don’t feel like paying them in full each week, then set up auto-pay so you never carry a balance.
Also, choose the best credit card rewards that fit your lifestyle. If you notice you spend most of your money at the grocery store and on fuel costs, then you may want to look at a card that gives you the highest cash back on those types of purchases.
Conversely, if you are someone who enjoys traveling, then it may be a good idea to look at cards that offer the best travel perks.
Check out Nerdwallet’s credit card reviews to help you choose the best option
70. Stop Going Out to Eat As Often
Food is a large portion of most people’s household budget. You might be spending more on food than you must because you go out to eat all the time. In many cases, you can make the same meals at home for a fraction of the cost. For a family of four, you can easily spend at least $40 for each restaurant meal.
If you don’t think it’s possible to feed a family on a budget, visit $5 Meal Plan. You can access delicious recipes that let you feed an army for pennies.
71. Switch to a Health Sharing Plan
You may not realize it, but health insurance is one of the largest monthly expenses. Switching to an affordable health sharing plan saves my family 75% in health insurance premiums compared to traditional health insurance. Honestly, it’s probably one of the best financial moves we made when I became self-employed.
Our Top Pick: There are many great health sharing options, but our favorite is Medi-Share because of the affordability AND their own MDLive program: a FREE add on that gives you 24/7 access to a doctor visit via your smartphone, which saves you time and money on co-pays!
Summary
It doesn’t matter if you want to pursue a side hustle, sell some of your belongings, or cut spending, there are multiple ways to get money fast. We all have different skills and schedules so you pick the ideas that work best for you. No matter which ideas you pick, you can’t go wrong because you’re improving your financial situation.
    70+ Ways to Get Money When You Need Money Now published first on https://justinbetreviews.tumblr.com/
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darcyfarber · 4 years
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70+ Ways to Get Money When You Need Money Now
  Are you here because you are saying to yourself, “I need money now and don’t know what to do”?
We all know nobody has a money tree in their backyard that grows dollar bills you can pick on-demand. However, you can still get money right now if you’re dealing with an unexpected bill, home repair, medical expense, or whatever it may be that is causing you to scramble for a quick money WITHOUT having to borrow it.
With a little hustle and creativity, you can begin implementing these ideas today to quickly increase your cash flow.
Believe me, my wife and I have had to raise cash quickly without paying late fees or borrowing money. Even if you have enough money in your emergency fund to cover a surprise expense, you can quickly replenish your balance with these earning hacks as well.
I Need Money Now – Earning Online
The good news is if you really need money right now, you can get money right now. Whether you want to make money from home, from an app on your phone or you’re willing to put your skills to work, here are some great ways to start earning income today.
1. Trade In Your Cell Phone and Put $475 in Your Pocket
Buyback Boss is who I continue to use whenever we upgrade to a new phone because they guarantee the most money for your phone and they send same-day payments via check or PayPal.
If you have an old phone in a drawer somewhere, why not sell it today and get paid ASAP? Think of that old phone as cash sitting in your drawer that you need right now.
You can also downgrade to last year’s model (often getting the phone for a few dollars with a new contract) and sell your current phone for up to $475. Here’s a screenshot I snapped of the latest offer I received on my current used phone (iPhone X) in good condition.
  2. Get Money Sent to Your PayPal For Your Opinion
Survey Junkie is a great place to start because cash can be deposited into your PayPal account, or you can get paid out via Amazon or Target gift cards for simply giving you opinion online.
We also have a full list of all different types of survey companies who are looking to pay people for their opinions on different products and brands. You can see the full list of the top survey companies here.
Our Top Pick: Survey Junkie has been around since 2005 and is the most trusted in the survey industry with a Trustpilot Rating of 4.4/5.
You can start making money today by checking out Survey Junkie here.
  3. Get Paid to Play Games
Yes, you can actually get paid to play games.
Mistplay is one of the very best places to get started.
The reason is online game creators need to have their games tested by real people before they launch it out to the market. 
For testing out their games on you mobile device, apps like Mistplay will pay via credits. These credits can then be cashed out in the form of different gift cards, including Visa or Amazon gift cards.
We also put together a full list of places that will pay you to play games here.
4. Teach English Online
Teaching English online to international students can be the perfect side hustle opportunity if you want to work before your children wake up or after bedtime. VIPKid is one of the leading online classrooms. To get started, you need a webcam, microphone, and a love for teaching.
Most of these online teaching sites require you to have a teaching degree or prior classroom experience.
5. Save Money and Make Money with the Honey App
The Honey App will search every online coupon for you and apply the best promo code at your checkout for free. This is the first way to save money.
Also, for every 2 people you refer to Honey, they will pay you $10 in the form of popular gift cards like Amazon, Walmart and Target.
By reducing how much you spend, you won’t have to earn as much money from these side hustles. Honey makes it easy to save money when you shop online by automatically applying every known discount code to your order when you checkout.
If you shop at Amazon, Honey also compares the prices of third-party sellers to the current Amazon price to quickly spot the lowest price so you pay less for the exact same product.
With no additional effort, Honey saves you money on products you are going to purchase regardless. Now, make sure you put your savings to good use!
You can also learn about the triple savings hack with honey here.
6. Complete Mini-Online Tasks
Swagbucks is the best place to start when for getting paid to complete tasks such as reading emails, surfing the web, playing games, shopping online and using mobile apps to name a few.
BONUS: One thing I really like about Swagbucks is the option to donate to one of the many charities they work with.
Our Top Pick: The most widely known company is Swagbucks, with a Trust Pilot Rating of 4.3/5..
With Swagbucks, you earn swagbucks that can be redeemed for cash via your PayPal or through gift cards to places like Walmart, Amazon, Express, or even Bass Pro Shops.
  7. Get a quick $10 with Ebates (now called Rakuten)
Ebates sends you cash via PayPal for shopping online or in stories at places you already normally shop.
Let’s be clear, unnecessary shopping is one of the last activities you need to do if you need to get money fast, but that doesn’t mean you can’t be a smart shopper for those unavoidable purchases. My wife and I shop with Ebates and get up to 40% cash back on nearly every online purchase.
Ebates cashback arrives once a quarter via PayPal or mailed check and you can get a bonus by referring your friends to shop with Ebates too. Using Ebates is like getting paid to shop.
Also, you can get a free $10 when you create an account with eBates today.
8. Freelance Online with Fiverr
Freelancing online with Fiverr is another great way to make money online. With Fiverr, you use your talents online without performing manual labor. Here are some of the possible gigs you can perform:
Writing blog posts
Graphic design
Website design
Creating YouTube videos
Translation
Proofreading
Voice Over
Jingles, sound effects, and songs
Similar to Fiverr, Upwork is another great platform for aspiring freelancers.
I have been freelancing online for the past two years and it’s been an excellent source of supplemental income because you can truly work from anywhere in the world with an internet connection and get paid.
9. Proofread
If you have an eye for detail and can spot typos from a mile away when you read the news or visit a restaurant, you might find your calling as a proofreader. Several proofreading companies require prior experience, but you can also get your foot in the door at Cactus Communications or freelancer platforms including Upwork and Fiverr.
If you are looking to perfect your craft as a proofreader and earn more money, look into Caitlin Pyle’s Proofread Anywhere program.
10. Create an Online Course
With Udemy, you can create a video course to teach others something you’re an expert in. Your video can be teaching computer coding, cooking skills, making a craft, or anything else in the Udemy course catalog. You collect a royalty for each course purchase and you can easily create new courses to continue earning residual income.
11. Transcribe Audio Recordings
Do you excel at dictation? Audio transcriptionists put sound recordings to paper. With sites like TranscribeMe, you transcribe one or two-minute recordings on a variety of topics. If you have medical or legal experience, you can make extra money transcribing these recordings that require a professional background.
12. Lucktastic
Lucktastic can give you a break from your other side hustles. This app is an instant win game where you can scratch multiple tickets each day and potentially win cash prizes. If you need money now, you should still pursue other recommendations that provide a guaranteed income first.
13. Test Websites and Apps
Another fun way to make money online is testing websites and apps. UserTesting is one of the most popular testing platforms. Each test takes up to twenty minutes to complete and you make $10. At that rate, you make $30 an hour for testing websites!
To become a tester, you will need a computer or app that has a functioning webcam and microphone. You are given a series of tasks to complete during the test and you verbally share your thoughts as you complete each task.
14. Sell Unwanted Gift Cards
Sometimes, you don’t have to work to make money because you already have it in unwanted gift cards. Instead of letting your gift cards collect dust, sell them on Gift Card Granny.
You can sell your unused and partially used gift cards quickly with three different selling options:
Sell It Now
Name Your Price
Trade In
Gift Card Granny finds the best price on the top gift card marketplaces and you get paid almost instantly when a sale is made.
I have sold several gift cards online almost always within 24 hours of posting and payment is sent via PayPal within three business days. Selling gift cards is one of the quickest ways to get money fast because of the quick turnaround.
15. Sell Unused Clothing
As your fashion tastes change or your children grow older, you might find yourself with a closet full of clothes you’ll never wear again. While you can sell them at a yard sale or local consignment shop, you might also consider selling online at thredUP for men’s, women’s, and children’s clothing.
For designer clothing you wish to keep but don’t plan to wear in the near future, Rent the Runway lets you rent your high-end articles for up to one month at a time.
Finally, my wife has also had success selling on eBay and Poshmark. To increase the odds of selling your items, make sure to take plenty of pictures and consider wearing them or putting them on a mannequin so the buyer can visualize how the item fits.
16. Sell Your Old Books
You can also make a quick buck by selling your used books and textbooks that you’ll no longer read. Selling our old books is another way we boost our income each year and you can start with these three sites:
Amazon Marketplace
Cash4Books
Bookscouter (Textbooks only)
Selling is easy as you only have to enter the ISBN to receive an instant quote from Cash4Books and Bookscouter. If you like the price, you ship the books for free using their prepaid shipping label and you will be paid via PayPal once your shipment arrives and is processed.
I recommend using Bookscouter for selling your textbooks as they compare the prices of 42 buyback vendors in a single search; saving you time while finding the best buyer.
17. Sell Movies, Music, and Video Games
You can also make some extra cash by selling your old DVDs, CDs, and video games with Bonavendi. With their app, you can scan barcodes and compare the prices of 28 companies including Amazon and Best Buy.
18. Sell Old Electronics
Decluttr can be the most efficient app to sell your old electronics, smartphone, and tech gadgets. The Decluttr app scans item barcodes and you receive next-day payments via PayPal and direct deposit once Decluttr receives your shipment. College students can also receive a 10% bonus payment to earn a little extra cash.
Make Money Locally
You should also consider making money within your local community. After all, not everybody wants to stare at a computer screen to make extra income. If you enjoy being on the move or have handy skills there are plenty of ways to have a gig without working a regular shift.
Also, ask your friends and family if they have any potential clients. Word of mouth referral is always one of the most effective forms of advertising.
19. Deliver Food, Drinks and Groceries to People
Have you heard of Postmates?
Postmates is a service where people can order food, drinks and groceries and have them available for delivery or pickup. The people who provide that service and get paid, are people just like yourself.
Postmates states that experienced couriers can earn up to $25 an hour and work on their own hours.
However, if you only want to deliver groceries to people, then you should also sign up for Instacart.
Instacart pays people quickly to deliver groceries from grocery store to their clients doorstep. Currently, people working with Instacart are making anywhere from $50 – $1,000 per month as a side hustle.
20. Get Cashback on Grocery Purchases
Each time you shop at grocery stores, you can get cashback with iBotta or Checkout51 . By activating offers and scanning your receipts, both of these apps gives you a cash reward for every redeemed offer. These cash rewards are in addition to any paper coupons you might clip, and you can potentially double your savings.
Checkout51 publishes their newest offers every Thursday. Once your account balance reaches $20, you can request a cash payment.
21. Become an Uber Driver
Uber is a great option if you have a car and like interacting with people. There are two additional reasons to consider driving for Uber:
Flexible hours
Weekly pay
Signup incentive for new drivers
Another reason to consider Uber is for their schedule flexibility; you drive when you have time and aren’t beholden to a specific shift or having to be available at least X hours a week.
You can find more information here to determine if driving with Uber is right for you.
22.  Deliver for Uber Eats
Uber Eats allows you earn on your own schedule by delivering food from restaurants to people.
The best thing about Uber Eats is you get to choose your wheels based on the city you live in. Depending on your city, you can deliver for Uber Eats via your car, bike or scooter. Just turn on the app in the morning before work, when you get home, or whenever you have some extra time to make money on your terms.
Also, the driver qualifications are less stringent for Uber Eats. In case you don’t meet the age and vehicle requirements to be a full-fledged Uber driver, you can be an Uber Eats driver until then.
23. Become an Airbnb Host
Become and Airbnb Host and you can start making really good income each month. There are many of benefits to being a homeowner, including the option to rent out your unused rooms for cash. But, by becoming an Airbnb host, travelers stay in your spare bedroom, basement, or second house.
Real estate is one time-tested approach to earning passive income and Airbnb can be less stressful than being a full-time landlord or trying to fix and flip houses for a profit. And, you get to interact with visitors coming from all corners of the world!
24. Become a TaskRabbit
There are people who need simple tasks completed but simply don’t have the time. Whether it’s putting together furniture from iKea, delivering a dresser across town, or trimming some overgrown bushes in the backyard – people will hire you.
Here are the top three places to find work using your phone:
TaskRabbit
OfferUp
Facebook Marketplace
Simply create a bio about yourself and then start looking for the task requests to pour in. I personally can tell you I utilize one of these three apps a week to find someone to do tasks for me!
25. Sell Locally on Craigslist
Bulky items aren’t cost-effective to sell online because they cost too much to ship. When that’s the case, sell locally with Craigslist or another app to sell locally. We periodically sell our unwanted items during the year and pocket 100% profit because it’s free to sell on these apps.
Beyond Craigslist, there are also dozens of other similar websites where you can sell your stuff locally as well.
26. Scan Grocery Receipts and Get $10
Earlier we told you ways to make money delivering through places like Postmates, Instacart and Uber Eats. However, there is still other money to be made by simply scanning grocery receipts.
Scanning grocery receipts for money is a real thing and there are over 20 apps that allow you to get started. While some are better than others, we recommend starting with the most popular receipts scanning app, Ibotta.
Our Top Pick: We like Ibotta because you can redeem digital offers plus your regular coupons for many food items at most supermarkets and even discount stores like Walmart and Target, and you also get a $10 sign-up bonus. When your rewards balance reaches $20, you can request PayPal payment or a gift card.
27. Rent Out Your Car
If you don’t drive your car every day or have the time to be an Uber driver, you can make some extra cash by renting your car on Turo. You can earn approximately $541 a month ($6,501 a year) when your car is worth $20,000 and it’s borrowed 15 days a month. This income can easily cover your monthly insurance premium and car payment.
Considering most cars are depreciating assets that lose value every day and cost money to maintain, renting your car on Turo is one of the very few ways your car can actually make money for you.
You will receive payment within five days after a rental period ends.
28. Rent Your Spare Bedroom
You can also make money by listing your spare bedroom or a second house as an Airbnb host. An increasing number of travelers prefer staying at Airbnb because it’s typically more reasonable than most hotel rooms and it’s a more enjoyable experience. Airbnb will help you through the listing process so you can begin taking guests and putting your vacant real estate to good use.
29. Recycle Scrap Material
It’s also possible to make money recycling scrap material for cash. You can get cash for some of the following items you might have in your house:
Loose metal (i.e., sheet metal, copper, tire rims)
Appliances
Metal cans
Glass bottles
For larger objects like your old washer and dryer, you will need a truck and trailer to haul your scrap off. You can look online for scrap yards and recycle-for-cash facilities near you.
30. Picking Up Dog Poop
You can also make money picking up dog poop when you don’t have the time to walk dogs or pet sit. Why? Because it only takes a few minutes to clean up a backyard compared to keeping a pet for several hours.
One man operates a full-time business picking up dog poop for a premium in the Phoenix area. You can scroll down to #73 on this side hustle list to see a video of how he turned dog poop into a full-time income.
31. Sell Used Furniture
Did you recently upgrade your living room or dining room set? If there’s still some life in your old furniture collection, get a few bucks for it. Craigslist or letgo can be your best friend to attract college students and young couples that only need something affordable, but Trove Market is another option for more valuable pieces.
32. Sell Your Car
Another way to raise cash quickly is to sell a car you no longer need. Even if you need to sell your fancy ride and drive a clunker instead, how else can you access $10,000+ instantly.
I sold my $20,000 sports car and now drive a very reliable $4,000 vehicle instead. Although I don’t turn as many heads as before, the $16,000 in cash proceeds was split between our savings and an extra house payment.
33. Have a Yard Sale
Decluttering helps you discover a small fortune sitting underneath your roof. The only problem is that you must sell your stuff to get cash. Having a yard sale is one of the quickest ways to sell most of your items in a weekend.
Coordinating your yard sale with your neighborhood sale is a good idea, but you should also post your sale on:
Craigslist
Facebook Marketplace
Your local newspaper
34. Deliver Phone Books
This job is seasonal, but it can be perfect if you only need to work for a few days. Neighborhoods all across the country still get a phone book delivered at least once a year. You can even get your daily exercise requirement in on delivery days too!
You can find local positions online to begin delivering phone books.
35. Pick Up Trash
You might find this income stream a tad bizarre, but you can make money picking up trash! Brian from Clean Lots has been doing it for thirty years and makes a six-figure income.
Business and shopping center parking lots don’t clean themselves. If you’re not afraid of getting your hands a little dirty, you can put some extra green in your wallet.
Tip: Hear Brian’s story on Episode 59 of the Money Peach Podcast.
36. Sell Your Clothes
You could do what you always do and hold a garage sale, or you can also try selling your clothes to a nearby consignment store. It’s less work and you might make more money! You can also use the same tactic for bulky household goods that are too expensive to ship to an online buyer.
Another option is to try selling your more valuable clothes online if you think you can earn more selling it yourself. Make sure you take good pictures and factor shipping prices into the equation too.
36. Flip Garage Sale Finds
One man’s trash is another man’s treasure. Some people might be selling their treasures at a discount because they need money now. By perusing garage sales and thrift stores, you can find bargains that can be sold online for a profit.
You can also scour the “Free” section on Craigslist for steals too. Once you figure out the average selling price of the items you plan to flip, shopping will be much easier and quicker.
You will need to find the system that works best for you to find treasures and the best places to sell them.
Every town has a different dynamic to find discounted items. One tip is to visit the thrift stores in the wealthier parts of your town as they are more likely to sell quality items at steep discounts. For example, you might be able to find designer clothing for a dollar that can be sold for $10 or more.
37. Wash Cars for Cash
You can offer to wash cars by hand by having a mobile car wash station or you can travel to a person’s house to wash the car. If you provide house calls or interior detailing, you need to provide your own cleaning supplies in addition to the car wash soap you use.
It’s also possible to offer exterior car waxing services to if you have the time and want to make some additional cash.
38. Pressure Wash Houses
Here’s one task that many homeowners neglect is pressure washing their home. Some people only pressure wash their homes when they get ready to sell it. You can advertise your services online or the old-fashioned way of knocking on doors.
To increase your chances of landing a job, take before and after pictures of a few homes that you pressure wash. Being able to show your clients visual examples of your quality work goes a long way.
39. Mow Lawns
You can also mow lawns and offer basic landscaping services to make money to while improving curb appeal for the homeowner.  This is a great idea to boost your income in the summer months when there’s more daylight and you’re probably outside already.
If you live in a region with significant snowfall, you can get paid during all four seasons to keep lawns and driveways in tiptop shape.
40. Clean Houses
Another way to make money any month of the year is to clean houses or places of business. You can find openings on Craigslist. For example, you might be able to clean vacation cabins on the weekends if you live near a touristy area. Or, cleaning services might also be looking for people to clean office buildings or industrial properties.
Depending on your personal network, you can also ask your friends and family if they know of anybody that needs help cleaning. Asking a simple question can help you find long-term clients or cleaning before somebody has company arrive to visit.
41. Donate Plasma
There’s a perpetual demand for plasma to treat rare, chronic diseases and you can make $400 each month by donating your plasma. Maybe this is something you or your friends did in college for some extra “weekend money.” You must be at least 110 pounds, at least 18-years-old in most states to donate and free of certain illnesses.
42. Participate in Paid Clinical Studies
Another option for making money locally is to participate in paid medical studies. You can find studies by searching for “paid medical studies near me” to find paid opportunities. You can also ask your local college or medical center if they are aware of any opportunities too.
When medical studies are available, you may have to be experiencing certain medical conditions. You will also need to be okay with being a “medical guinea pig” and testing new medications and treatment ideas.
43. Teach Lessons
All those piano lessons or karate lessons your parents paid for can finally be put to good use. You can teach a skill one night a week or multiple nights depending on how many students you have. Whether it’s music lessons, karate, gymnastics, or another talent you can teach individually or to a group, you can advertise locally to get students.
Once you decide what you can teach, you can advertise your services on Craigslist or also leave flyers at local businesses, community centers, or the public library.
44. Babysit
Parents sometimes need a break–date night— from their children and need to hire a babysitter. Besides asking for your family and friends for gigs, you can always advertise your services on Care.com.
45. Pet Sitting and Dog Walking
Animals need loving too and you can make just as much money pet sitting when their owners leave town or work long hours. Dog walking is another daily hustle opportunity as you take the dogs on their daily walk so their owner doesn’t have to.
Believe it or not, some professional dog walkers make $100,000 a year for doing something that millions of dog owners do every day for free.
Two places to begin advertising your pet sitting and dog walking services are Care and Rover.
46. Clean Houses
If you keep a clean house, put your skills to work by cleaning other people’s houses or office buildings in your spare time. Care.com can help you connect you with homeowners that don’t have the time to clean their house. Another great resource is Craigslist and looking in the “Part-Time Jobs” section.
47. Mow Lawns
When the grass is green, make money mowing lawns in your neighborhood and around town. Mowing lawns can be the perfect seasonal job if you need to make extra money in the summer when school is out or there’s more sunlight to work outside in the evenings.
48. Shovel Snow
You can also make money during the winter shoveling driveways and sidewalks. By owning a truck and plow, you can earn more keeping parking lots clean. Because snow removal is more labor-intensive than mowing a lawn, you can earn more per property than mowing (I did at least).
49. Clean Gutters and Rake Leaves
In the fall, you can also rake leaves and clean gutters before winter sets in. Once again, these are simple tasks that most homeowners simple don’t enjoy doing and offer a decent income if you enjoy working outside.
50. Pressure Wash Houses
Most houses need to be pressure washed every two or three years to maintain that “new” look. Many homeowners either don’t own a pressure washer or don’t have the time to keep their siding clean. You can advertise your services online or simply start knocking on doors to get your first clients.
51. Paint Houses
If you own a paint sprayer, can smoothly roll paint, or know how to seamlessly cut in wall edges, painting houses is another possibility. This is one task most homeowners won’t attempt on their own, especially if they aren’t a skilled painter or they are preparing to sell their house and want a professional-quality job.
52. Become a Handyman
Property management is a huge business beyond yard work, you can use your hands to help your neighbors with various home tasks with Takl or TaskRabbit including:
Home improvement
Mounting and installing new household devices
Furniture assembly
Moving and packing
53. Collect Scrap Metal
You or your family and friends might have a garage full of old household appliances. Maybe you have acquired a small scrap metal collection from your other side hustle opportunities. Regardless of how you (legally) collect your scrap, taking your ferrous and non-ferrous metal to a local scrap yard will yield an instant payment.
Some of the best ferrous and non-ferrous metals to collect are:
Aluminum
Brass
Copper
Steel
You will get the best price by bringing a single, large load compared to many small loads–even if they’re the same weight. Scrap yards have an easier time selling larger quantities to buyers and reward you with a volume bonus for making their job easier.
54. Deliver Newspapers
Newspaper routes are a steady part-time income stream if you can work in the early morning hours before your regular job or classes. If there are multiple newspaper in your town, you can also apply for a route that might deliver only a few days per week–instead of all seven– if you can’t commit to delivering papers every day of the week.
55. Deliver Phone Books
A one-time, seasonal hustle is delivering phone books five days a week. You need to be at least 18-years-old and have a driver’s license to participate. PDC is one of the largest delivery companies and they might be looking for delivery people like you.
56. Cut Firewood
Many people still heat their houses with wood in the winter or need wood for summer camping trips, but they don’t have access to their own firewood source. Or, they don’t have the time to cut their own wood. Cutting and delivering firewood is another in-demand income stream.
Make Better Decisions with the Money You Have
Whether it’s getting on a budget or learning how to manage the money you currently have, you still get a raise. In fact, the biggest raise you will ever receive in your working lifetime is not when you make more money, but when you control the money you already have.
57. Get on a Budget
Most of us don’t like the word budget because it’s so restrictive, right? We think if we are on a budget, then the result is our life goes from fun to awful in a blink of an eye.
But what if a budget was simply a plan for your money. Instead of wondering where it went at the end of each month, what if you decided where it went? What would it feel like if you were in control of your money each month?
Creating a budget is easier than you may think.
Step 1: Start a free and simple budget today.
58. Hire a Money Coach
Are you tired of trying to figure out the money all by yourself without any help? Does it feel like no matter how hard you try, you never seem to have any money left over at the end of the month.
The problem isn’t you, the problem is you were never shown what to do or how to do it.
Chris Peach teaches a live program (not an online course) called Smart Money Academy. Inside the program, Chris will show you how to create a budget you can stick to and he will even guarantee you will save $500 in the first month we work together. 
If Chris doesn’t come through on these two promises, the program is 100% free to you. If you are looking for someone to walk with you step-by-step through your financial journey and actually help you along the way, Chris Peach from SMA is the coach I highly recommend.
59. Ditch Your Permanent Life Insurance Policy
One of the worst “investments” an adult can make is buying permanent life insurance – aka Cash Value Policy. In most cases, the policy benefits are not worth the extra cost. Apply for a term life insurance policy instead that can be ten times cheaper than a permanent life insurance policy. Once you have your new term policy in place, cash out your cash value immediately!
60. Switch Bank Accounts
This hack won’t give you more spending money, but you can avoid overdraft fees, monthly account fees, and earn more interest on your deposit. In addition to thinking about short-term ways to make money, you should also pursue long-term income streams to earn recurring wealth.
Best Savings and Checking Accounts RateDetails CIT Savings Builder2.05% APR$100 monthly deposit OR $25,000 account balance CIT Money Market Account1.75% APR $100 min opening deposit UFB Direct2.00% APR$0 min to open account. $10,000 minimum to earn full 2.25% Axos Rewards Checking Account1.11% APRNo overdraft or non-sufficient fund fees, unlimited domestic ATM fee reimbursements and no minimum balance requirements
60. Refinance Your High Interest Debt
There are much better options for you instead of high interest credit card debt or any high interest debt for that matter. Borrowers are literally saving thousands of dollars in interest payments by trading their higher interest debt for a lower interest personal loan. The nice thing is you have so many more options than you did just a few years ago and with the competition for your business, your new interest rate could be much lower than what you have now.
Check our our favorite places to start for lowering your high interest debt.
61. Refinance Your Student Loans
If you have a mountain of student loans to repay, you can refinance the balance for a potentially lower interest rate. This is because you now have a job and your credit score has likely improved since you earned your diploma. Credible is a leader in student loan refinancing and they even offer job loss protection benefits and incentives for entrepreneurs too.
Immediately Cut Your Spending for an Instant Pay Raise
Are you ready to learn the secret on getting an immediate pay raise? Reduce your monthly spending.
For example, if you can spend $100 less each month than right now, you get an instant $1,200 indirect pay raise for the year. And, it might only take a few minutes to make a few quick changes to immediately begin saving money.
Besides using your free time to make money, you can also use these money hacks to instantly cut your spending. Another mantra you might take to hear is, “Spend less, work less.” By cutting your spending, maybe you don’t have to sacrifice your work/life balance to make extra money.
62. Save Your Spare Change
Maybe you’ve heard the tip of stashing all of your $1 bills in a savings envelope instead of keeping them into your wallet to spend on coffee and candy bars to easily save money for the future. The Acorns app makes it even easier to save and invest your spare change instead of spending it.
With each purchase, Acorns rounds up the purchase amount to the next dollar for every credit or debit card purchase. For example, a $4.25 purchase becomes $5 and the extra 75 cents is invested to build a small nest egg. You can also get extra cash investments by shopping online through Acorns retail partners too.
63. Stop Paying High Investing Fees
Each time you buy or sell a stock or ETF, your brokerage might charge up to $7 per trade. If you’re only investing small amounts of income at a time or are simply tired of paying hundreds of dollars in trade commissions each year M1 Finance is an option you should definitely give a look.
64. Trim Automatically Gets Rid of Your “Gray Charges”
Ask Trim makes it easy to “work smarter and not harder.”  For free, Trim monitors your spending, account balances, and can even reduce your monthly bill amount in the following categories:
Cable, cell phone, and internet
Car insurance
Unwanted subscriptions
With a single text message or Facebook Messenger request, Trim works on your behalf to find discounts on your current monthly bills or cancel the services–streaming plans including Hulu and Spotify, insurance, and gym membership– you no longer use but are still paying for.
You will realize the savings the next time you get ready to pay your bills and realize there’s more money in your bank account than usual; and you never lifted a finger.
Read our full Trim Review to learn about all of Trim’s benefits to save you money.
65. Cancel Your Cable TV Subscription
The average household cable TV bill is over $120 a month and most people only watch 20 of the 100s of channels to choose from. We dumped our cable years ago and use services like Hulu for our favorite shows with SlingTV for a total of $26/month (and no contracts).
By cutting the cord, you instantly save $100 a month on cable TV by streaming live and on-demand programming over your high-speed internet. Sling TV can be watch with any flat screen TV, computer, or mobile device.
BONUS: If you’re a fan of the 90’s TGIF shows like me, Hulu now offers Full House, Family Matters, Step by Step, Perfect Strangers and Hangin with Mr. Cooper.
66. File Price Protection Claims for Online Orders
You can already get cashback on every online purchase when you shop with a shopping app like Ebates and you can get additional cash back if the price drops after you make the purchase.
With Paribus, you can get free price protection notifications when a retailer drops the price on recent purchases. Paribus then submits the claim on your behalf, which means you don’t have to monitor for price changes yourself and then submit it.
Disclaimer: Paribus does compensate MoneyPeach when you sign up for Paribus using the links we have provided in this post. 
67. Earn Credit Card Rewards
Many people stick with debit cards because you’re still required to immediately pay for your purchases with cash. While you won’t go into credit card debt, you’re missing out on credit card rewards for cash back or travel rewards.
If you are going to use a credit card, make sure to pay them off in full so you don’t incur high interest payments. The best way to do this is to set a reminder to pay your credit cards in full once per week. If you don’t feel like paying them in full each week, then set up auto-pay so you never carry a balance.
Also, choose the best credit card rewards that fit your lifestyle. If you notice you spend most of your money at the grocery store and on fuel costs, then you may want to look at a card that gives you the highest cash back on those types of purchases.
Conversely, if you are someone who enjoys traveling, then it may be a good idea to look at cards that offer the best travel perks.
Check out Nerdwallet’s credit card reviews to help you choose the best option
68. Stop Going Out to Eat As Often
Food is a large portion of most people’s household budget. You might be spending more on food than you must because you go out to eat all the time. In many cases, you can make the same meals at home for a fraction of the cost. For a family of four, you can easily spend at least $40 for each restaurant meal.
If you don’t think it’s possible to feed a family on a budget, visit $5 Meal Plan. You can access delicious recipes that let you feed an army for pennies.
69. Switch to a Health Sharing Plan
You may not realize it, but health insurance is one of the largest monthly expenses. Switching to an affordable health sharing plan saves my family 75% in health insurance premiums compared to traditional health insurance. Honestly, it’s probably one of the best financial moves we made when I became self-employed.
Our Top Pick: There are many great health sharing options, but our favorite is Medi-Share because of the affordability AND their own MDLive program: a FREE add on that gives you 24/7 access to a doctor visit via your smartphone, which saves you time and money on co-pays!
Summary
It doesn’t matter if you want to pursue a side hustle, sell some of your belongings, or cut spending, there are multiple ways to get money fast. We all have different skills and schedules so you pick the ideas that work best for you. No matter which ideas you pick, you can’t go wrong because you’re improving your financial situation.
    70+ Ways to Get Money When You Need Money Now published first on https://mysingaporepools.weebly.com/
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State watchdogs must investigate the source of funds for Yameen’s Y18 Sports Fiesta
How did President Yameen’s campaign team raise MVR 7.5 million for organizing a sports fiesta? Amid widespread public corruption and embezzlement reported in the audit reports, people of the Maldives must be told how such a huge sum has been raised. The answer for this question is important for all Maldivians. Even if Dharubaaru Faction of PPM reveals the ways in which this sum was raised for just one event, the watchdogs must investigate the funding sources to establish that these are not embezzled from the state or laundered through illegal means. The recent behaviour of the Maldives at the UN (regarding the persecuted Rohingya community) and Yameen’s over-dependence on China also make this investigation important to ensure that the presidency is not a foreign-power installed presidency.
The Y18 Sports Fiesta —  a nationwide sports festival organised as part of the campaign event for the re-election of Abdulla Yameen was launched on 18 September 2017. Speaking at the ceremony, held at the National Art Gallery, Yameen praised his wife, Fathimath Ibrahim and her team for organizing such a large-scale event. The official logo of the festival and its website were launched by Yameen at the function. A women’s volleyball tournament and men’s futsal tournament will be held in the fiesta. The prize money allotted for the winning teams is MVR 7.5 million (US$490,000). This is excluding the expenses for organizing the fiesta.
The tournaments consist of three rounds and the 20 atolls are categorized into six regions for the fiesta. MVR 50,000 is set to be awarded to the champions of atoll tournaments while it is set to award MVR30,000 for runners-up. In addition, fair play teams will be awarded with MVR 20,000. Similarly, zone champions will be awarded with MVR 100,000 and runners-up with 75,000 and fair play teams with MVR 50,000. Champion of the tournament in which all champions compete will be awarded 200,000 rufiyaa and the runner-up with MVR 150,000. The fair-play team of the Champions’ tournament will get MVR 75,000. The event organizers will provide a Home Kit, Away Kit, and Official Kit for each team, and to prepare for the festival each team will receive MVR 15,000 (for the Atoll Round), MVR 50,000 (for Zone Round), and MVR 100,000 (for the Final Round).
The organizers are promoting the event as the “The Largest Sporting event in Maldivian History”. Obviously, nobody in the Maldives can miss such a humongous event, and especially when it is promoted by two media agencies, Vaguthu and state broadcaster Public Service Media (PSM).
Despite the strong marketing and the involvement of public servants in organizing the event, it has not come into the attention of the watchdogs, Elections Commission and Anti-Corruption Commission.
It should have come to their attention as it violates the laws. Firstly, the event itself amounts nothing less than offering bribes as the purpose of the event to gain political support for a candidate contesting in the 2018 Presidential Elections and not as for any other objective. Even if the event is considered to be organized by Fathimath Ibrahim, as an individual, it is a clear violation of Article 5 of Corruption Prevention Act (Law: 2/2000). Hence, it must be investigated by the Anti-Corruption Commission (with powers given to the Commission in Article 21(a) of the Anti-Corruption Commission Act).
In the media releases and public announcements, it has been admitted that the “fiesta is a campaign event for President Yameen for the Presidential Election to be held next year” . Hence, it is clear that the Elections Commission must be monitoring the progress of the Fiesta. In that respect, the Fiesta violates Article 29(b) of The General Law on Elections (Law 11/2008). Furthermore, the Fiesta is a step beyond the permitted activities for gaining support to a candidate contesting for a public office, as the permitted activities are clearly stated in Article 28(b) of Law 11/2008. The huge prize money and financial reward (prize money) and material reward (three sets of jerseys) for just participating in the Fiesta illustrates the extent the event can harm other potential candidates through undue influence, both directly and indirectly.
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