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doyouknowbtsswag · 3 years

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Discs|Tommyinnit|

(Takes place as actual Minecraft)

Tommy adored listening to Music since he was younger because of his older brother, Wilbur. Tommy's childhood was something special to him. He had a loving family which consisted of a father and two older twins. His father better known as Philza Minecraft was the perfect father, he was protective of his children and made sure they weren't hurt. His older twins were almost like different people. Technoblade always had his guard up and never really shown his emotional side except when he needed to, which never really happened. Techno also loved Greek Mythology and could quote almost every story by heart. Wilbur was more into making songs and singing he never really enjoyed violence, so he would play on his guitar while Techno trained.

Aside from his family life he had two best friends which were just as important. Tubbo was his right-hand man and was the first person to talk to him. His other best friend, Y/n was the person who he could always lean on and wasn't afraid to show his raw emotions. Sure he wanted to show his tuff side but the day you saw him cry was the time Tommy realized he could rely on you the most. Don't get me wrong he could rely on Tubbo as well but he made sure to put on a tough act for the boy because of his family life.

Tubbo's family was not the best, his father would always yell and neglect him, let's not leave out the fact that he's a drunk. His father always likes that but after his mom died his dad was heartbroken and it affected him he didn't pay attention to how his son felt. Being 6 years old and his mother passing away Tubbo didn't have the best childhood. So Tommy made sure Tubbo could lean on him.

Tommy was certainly the ring leader of the gang. He always suggested pranks and decided on games to play. Tommy wasn't happy he was younger than Tubbo but was happy he was older than Y/n. He always felt the need to protect you with every strength he could muster. His favorite game showed that. They played a game many kids played, the Knight, Princess, and the villain. Of course, Tommy was the knight and you were the princess tubbo would be the villain but sometimes Wilbur would play with them. Wilbur being 11 towered over them and was much stronger than the little kids which would make it 10 times more fun.

On his 7th birthday, he had a small party nothing too big, just his family, you and Tubbo. Tubbo couldn't get him much so he made Tommy a bandana. Even though Tubbo felt bad he couldn't give Tommy anything grand Tommy appreciated the bandana and put it around his neck showing Tubbo he liked it. Wilbur, Techno, and Phil gave him a copy of the family photo. It was rare to be able to take a photo so getting a copy of one made it just as great of a gift. Then the final gift was from you. You knew he loved music so you tried to get at least one rare Disc, but you managed to get two.

He stared at the Discs in amazement quickly running to the old jukebox his father owned. He put in the disc Cat. He smiled at the sound of the music, let's just say it was his favorite birthday gift he ever got. He hugged you which made you blush but you hugged back smiling. The others were awed at the sight. Wilbur managed to take a quick picture and made a mental note to get it printed out. It cost a lot but the now 12-year-old would do anything for his little brother.

A few months later Tommy woke up to arguing between his brothers and father. He silently stepped down the stairs making sure to go as slow as possible.

"What is up with you lately dad! All you do is stay in your room! You left us to take care of Tommy ever since you got that stupid letter a few months ago! Tommy hasn't noticed because of us!" Techno whisper yelled trying not to wake up Tommy which was a little too late.

"Not only that but you try to redeem yourself by giving us small gifts! Sure I appreciate it but I know why you're doing it! You don't want anyone noticing you've been acting suspicious lately" Wilbur crossed his arms.

"Keep it down you're gonna wake your brother" Phil whispered trying to stall the sudden outburst by the twins.

Tommy ran upstairs quietly putting clothes on to run to your house. He climbed out his window carefully. He would occasionally climb out his window if he was grounded to walk to Tubbo's house or your house. Right now he was on the way to yours.

It took him 10 minutes to get to your house. He grabbed a small pebble and threw it at your window. He threw 2 more before you opened the window looking down at the boy.

"Tommy what are doing here," I said watching the boy climb up to my window. He looked upset. Sitting in my bed.

"They're fighting again..."

"Whos fighting?" I asked sitting next to him.

Tommy was looking down tears streaming his face.

"My brothers and dad" He whispered. "It happened last week too but it wasn't that bad but they've been fighting more recently and I don't like it" The 7-year-old sniffled.

"Do you know what they were arguing about?" I asked placing my hands gently on his.

"My dad has been acting differently apparently" He sighed wiping his tears " I didn't notice but apparently it's so obvious to Techno and Wilbur"

"Maybe your dad is working on something really important," I said not knowing how to fully answer.

"Probably" He muttered

"Hey, I know how to cheer you up!" I said running over to one of my chests.

I looked through a few chests trying to find a music disc to play for Tommy. When I finally found it I ran to the Jukebox and put it in the slot. The disc played Chirp throughout the room. I look over and saw Tommy smiling just a bit.

"How do you have so many Discs," Tommy asked standing up walking to the Jukebox.

"My grandpa had a bunch before he died, he gave them all to me because when I was younger all we did was listen to the discs" I smiled at the memory.

"So why did you give Cat and Mellohi to me?" He asked

"Because your my favorite person in the world" I looked at him smiling I could see his face turn red which made me giggle.

"You're my favorite person in the world too," Tommy said pulling me into a hug to which I hugged him back.

"Thank you..."

"Your welcome Toms"

He pulled away from the hug and looked out the window seeing the sun slowly rise.

"Oh crap, I have to go before I get caught" He panicked running to the window.

"wait!" I ran and grabbed Chirp from the Jukebox running to the window hanging me the disc. "Take it"

"But I thought-"

"Let that disc remind you of me if you ever need to let out your feelings"

"Thank you" He smiled kissing my cheek then climbing down the house.

"Thomas!" I shouted but still smiling.

"Bye" He grinned waving

"Be safe" I whispered watching him run off to his house.

Tommy ran as fast as he could to his house before the sun could rise any longer. He climbed up to his window jumping into his room. He was holding the disc carefully when he was climbing so he didn't scratch it. He laid in bed out of breath from running but thank god he made it back before anyone noticed.

A few weeks later you suddenly stopped coming over to play with him and Tubbo. Tommy just thought you had something to do with your family as you did every so often. Days turned into weeks. He sat every night looking at the picture Wilbur took on his birthday of you guys hugging. It didn't sit right that you hadn't shown up or even sent a message that you were away. It confused him.

The next day he begged his family to take him to your house. Yes, he knew how to get to your house but he still wanted one of his brothers to go with I'm knowing his father was still busy. Tommy asked Wilbur in the morning but Wilbur said he was busy today and maybe tomorrow. Tommy had to go today no matter what so he ran to Technoblade's room knocking on the door. Only for Techno to say he was busy and not to bother him.

He sighed knowing he would have to go himself. He put his jacket on and shoes. He walked out of the house and made his way over to your house. Tommy ran to your house concerned, he had a bad feeling and wanted to make sure you were okay.

He saw your house and sprinted faster when he arrived he walked to the door seeing it partially opened. He opened the door all the way seeing the inside of the house destroyed. He walked inside looking around.

"Y/n?" He said seeing shattered glasses on the ground.

"Y/n?!" He saw blood on the ground which made his breath hitch.

"Y/N!" He ran up to your room panicked only to be faced with a pool of blood on the floor.

"No no no no no no," He said his body giving out on him making him fall to the ground blood getting on his clothes and shoes.

He didn't bother to get up and leave. He physically couldn't get up his body was in a paralyzed state so he was forced to lay where you possibly died. his breath was heavy and it was like he had no oxygen in his lungs. he wanted to cry for help but the way he was breathing, it was useless to try. He eventually passed out due to a lack of oxygen.

When he woke up it was night. He still laid in your bedroom but this time he could actually breathe. He then realized he had been gone all day and didn't know what time of night it was. Tommy slowly got up looking at his bloodied clothes. His tears silently fell as he made himself walk back to his house. He wasn't bothered by the noises of the creatures around the area. He couldn't care less if he got hurt because he had a bigger wound that no one would ever be able to fix.

The house lights were on and he saw people sitting outside. He walked closer and saw his family with worried looks on their faces. When they heard footsteps they looked to see Tommy slowly making his way to the door. Wilbur immediately ran up to the little boy pulling him into a hug.

"You had us all fucking worried!" He pulled away from the hug only then noticing the blood. "Holy shit your hurt"

Tommy just stood there no words came out of his mouth as his brother brought him inside to check his "wounds". He was sat on the kitchen counter as Phil raced to grab the first aid kit. when Wilbur went to take Tommy's shirt off to clean the "wound" He says nothing but dried blood.

"Tommy?..."

"She's gone....."

"What?"

"Y/N IS GONE!" His sudden outburst made the 14-year-old jump.

"She's dead Wilby" He sobbed Wilbur pulled the boy into a hug and tried calming down the younger boy. Tommy eventually fell asleep and Wilbur changed him into his pajamas taking the bloody clothes to the washer.

10 years later he sat in exile he lost his precious Discs and was now sent out of the land that he built with Wilbur and Tubbo when Phil went missing and Technoblade left. Wil eventually died by his own father. It was the first time he had seen Phil in 10 years only to see him kill one of the only people who stuck by him.

He then lost Tubbo who exiled him for a stupid prank he did on George's house with Ranboo. Tommy wasn't the type to snitch on someone so he took the blow for Ranboo. He had officially lost everything he ever cared about, the only thing he had left was a picture of you and him hugging when he was 7 years old.

"Tommy?...."

"Y/n?!"

------------------------------------------------------- Just thought of this randomly. ✨YOU ARE AMAZING AND PERFECT THE WAY YOU ARE! YOU ARE WORTH IT ON SO MANY LEVELS✨

#tommyinnit x reader #tommy mcyt #tommyinnit #tommyinit mcyt #tommyinit dsmp #mcyt x reader #mcyt fanfiction #minecraft #philza minecraft #philza #tubbo mcyt #mcyt #dsmp x reader #dsmp x you

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giorno-plays-piano · 4 years

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Sleep tight

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader

Warnings: yandere, obsession, stalking, home invasion, non-consensual drug use, allusion to kidnapping.

Words: 4163.

Summary: You know someone tried to break into your apartment, but no one believes you since you live in the very same building as famous Captain America. Who is willing to risk it?

P.S. Inspired by the Door Lock.

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You were coming back from work late again, carrying a paper bag with fresh chicken nuggets, French fries and two butter croissants you intended to leave for the morning. It was your little ritual - every time you worked long hours you went to buy some fast food afterwards instead of cooking youself a dinner. You had neither strength nor desire to spend your evening in the kitchen.

Funny, you thought, how many people were walking the same street as you, and you felt like you were alone in the whole world, nonetheless. Every day was exactly the same: you were waking up feeling groggy and exhausted, making youself coffee and leaving for work where you spent most of your time; you looked for excuses to stay late just because you didn't want to come back to your empty apartment where it was always eerie silent. Then you read some book you ordered from Amazon or Indigo, had a glass of water and went to sleep. Your life was like an endless limbo or a time loop.

Watching a few school girls giggling and taking out there cellphones and cameras, you sighed. That poor Steve Rogers living the same building as you had it much, much worse. At least you didn't have any crazy fans following you and making photos of your windows, hoping to catch a glimpse of you.

"Hey you there! What are you doing?" Someone's grumpy voice cut through the silence, and all those girls suddenly ran, laughing nervously and clenching their cameras.

It was one of your neighbors, a man in his 60s who was living two floors beneath yours, who walked to the building with a grocery bag in his hand.

"I swear to God next time I'm gonna take their phones and call their parents right away!" He grunted, shaking his bold head.

"I'll be there to give you a hand, Mr. Jones." You smiled at him, and he let out a chuckle, opening the door for you. "Thank you."

"You're welcome, dear."

Well, today wasn't that bad. Those girls couldn't do much harm. You remembered the day when you saw huge scary men dressed in black walking the corridor to Captain's apartment - it was way more frightening than a couple of silly students making photos of his balkony. But, regardless of how dangerous it could be to live so close to probably America's most famous superhero, the rent was doubled in a week and became three times higher in two months. You were lucky your landlady was a very compassionate woman who didn't raise the price immediately after he moved in this building.

Opening the door to your apartment with a key, you took off your shoes and put the bag on a little side table. God, you wanted to sleep so bad.

Barely eating a few nuggets you went to bed without opening the new book you bought.

The next morning you didn't feel much better, though. It was like you went to bed at 5 am instead of retiring early. Your mind was hazy. You were almost squiffy though you hadn't been drinking alcohol for a month or so.

Damn, you needed to do something about that lifestyle of yours. It was obviously unhealthy.

You spent one more day in the office doing useless work no one cared about. Coming back home felt as lonely as never before, and you almost cried in the dark before taking a hold of yourself and entering the building. There were no girls with the cameras today.

Laying on your bed, you stared at the glass of water on your nightstand. You didn't even remember refilling it in the morning. How much did you remember at all before arriving at work?

Oh no, you weren't going to live like that anymore. No more working overtime. No more fast food. No more weeping in your room with the lights off. You were a decent human being who didn't deserve to live like a recluse. Tomorrow evening you were going to dress up and go for a glass of wine in that little restaurant you were passing by every day. And in the weekend it would be good to give a call to your cousin and ask for a visit.

You hummed, looking at the clock glimming in the darkness of the room. It was already midnight, but you didn't feel even a bit sleepy. It was odd. Staring at the ceiling, you tried counting sheep but failed miserably after two hundreds. It was then when you heard someone's footsteps behind your door and chewed your lips. Was it Mrs. Abebe who lived next to you? She was never coming that late. Not that you remembered.

You were probably imagining things since the sound of footsteps died, but you didn't hear anyone opening the door or, in fact, moving at all. You were simply tired from all that stress.

That was what you were thinking when you heard someone inserting the key into your lock. You stilled, your eyes almost popping out of the sockets. What was happening? What was that?

Then the sound of the lock opening made you jump.

"Who is that?!" You screamed at the top of your voice and grabbed the lamp from your nightstand. "Who's there?!"

Then everything went silent once again, the door still closed in front of you. You couldn't hear any footsteps, couldn't feel anyone's presence just behind the door as if no one tried to force it open just a few seconds ago. You didn't know how much time you spent standing there, a heavy lamp in your hands to strike down the intruder, but no one had opened the door.

In the end, you clenched your teeth and slowly moved forward, pressing your ear to the cold metal - there were no sounds coming behind it whatsoever. Then you glanced through the peephole and saw only a row of doors just like yours. The stranger was gone.

You couldn't sleep after that, of course. You locked the door again, moved your heavy drawer to block it, and started calling the cops. Whoever was it, a thief or some creep, you didn't want to sit there and wait when someone gonna break into your apartment.

Police did nothing, of course. There were no cameras in the corridor to check whether someone was truly walking there, and, except that, they could help little with your situation. The camera outside showed no one entering the building, too.

In fact, they were so skeptical after hearing your story they almost made you cry. Why would anyone want to break in? You had pretty much nothing valuable except for a few gadgets and a little bit of money.

"No one would risk coming close to the place where Steve Rogers lives, ma'am," one of the cops informed you, irritated at your persistence. "You probably imagined it in your sleep."

No, you didn't. You heard it with your own ears, and no policeman could make you doubt that. You didn't care whether that freak was afraid of Steve Rogers, you just needed to be safe.

Next morning you didn't go to work. Instead you called a locksmith company and looked through all those smart lock that cost a fortune, but they were so much better than the pathetic one you had. The guy you were speaking to informed you that, actually, you story wasn't uncommon - New York was full of burglars. He calmed you down a bit by saying that it was probably some rookie who didn't ever hear about Captain America living in the same building.

The smart keyless lock you got installed was pricey but offered a great protection, the guy claimed. As you still shook from what happened earlier, you called your cousin, nevertheless, and went to live in her place for the whole week. Just thinking of what could happen to you that night brought you nightmares.

Who was that? What did that person need from you? Was he really hoping to get anything valuable without even knowing who lived there? Why did they come at night and not during the day when you were at work? God, you were scared to learn the answers.

You were no longer walking the streets alone as your kind cousin brought you to and off work, watching that no one was following you. It was a great relief to know there were no scary dudes around, but you couldn't be calm still. You barely slept at night.

Your cousin was too worried to let you go and live by yourself again even with the new lock installed, so you decided to stay with her for one more week. You just needed to get a few more things from your apartment since last time you left in haste. Of course, you didn't go there alone, your cousin and two of her male friends coming with you just in case something was to happen.

You screamed when you saw your new lock smashed to pieces, its black plastic parts laying on the floor right in front of your door.

This time police couldn't say anything about you imagining things, and the investigation had finally started. What scared you even more was that Mrs. Abebe had sweared the lock was in perfect condition when she returned home yesterday, and she didn't hear anything at all last night, a few other neighbors saying the same. No one knew how it happened and who could it be.

"But I just don't understand how could someone try this right under Captain's nose." One of the policemen huffed and puffed.

"Steven Rogers has been on a mission since last week." A woman said angrily, watching the guy with disgust. You vaguely remembered her name was Kate and she lived on the same floor as Steve. "Please don't tell me you need Captain America just to make you do your job."

With so many people expecting someone to break into their homes and fearing for their lives, it was easier to demand installing cameras in the corridors everywhere in the building. More than that, a few cameras were installed in your apartment too. A new biometric lock was now attached to your door, but you weren't sure it could keep you safe. It all felt unreal.

Of course, you were living with your cousin. She not only didn't protest against it, but refused to let you go anywhere at all. The only place you were still coming to was the office your worked in, and she was bringing you there and driving you home all the time.

The police said that the criminal didn't leave any fingerprints anywhere, and, most importantly, they didn't see any stranger entering the house the day your lock was smashed. It probably meant it was someone who stayed in the building. When they said that, Mrs. Abebe moved out the apartment the very same day and came to live with her son. You felt both pity and guilt. If you weren't there, she could live in that place peacefully like before.

Although the stranger didn't show up, the old policeman handling your case said something was very wrong there, he could feel it in his bones. This person wasn't a simple burglar, for sure. Although the policeman asked you to come back to your apartment - of course, under the watchful eyes of his team ready to defend you - to somehow provoke the criminal, you didn't agree. You valued your life too much to become a bait.

You just wanted to keep living with your cousin, especially when you were finally able to sleep again. You still felt groggy after, but you didn't consider it too important after all that happened to you.

However, you had to change your mind when one day you woke up and saw the toilet seat up. There was no man living at your cousin's place, and she didn't let anyone come over for a week at least.

The stranger had found you. He sneaked into the house all the same like before, but now it was also your cousin's life at stake, not just yours.

You cried and wept and prayed until you were a complete mess, your head heavy from the shouting. It wasn't a burglar who followed you - it was a stalker. The policemen were deeply concerned with the truth, but they gave you hope - stalkers rarely left their victim under such circumstances, and they were most certain they would capture the intruder the next time this psycho showed up.

You agreed to return to your old apartment. What else was there to do to keep your dear cousin safe?

It was as empty and silent as before, but now the atmosphere turned sinister. You were afraid to touch your own things, thinking of the sick bastard who touched them - the one who touched you in your sleep. No one had told you about it, but you were certain this person had been there with you many times before you caught him. Your routine had been very much the same during the whole year, and they knew it and used it to their advantage. Your stalker had seen you, touched you, done something to you. He was there all the time, and you didn't know. The cameras police installed showed everything that was happening in the apartment except for bathroom, so you tried to avoid going there as much as you could. Yes, you were on display all the time, but you weren't ashamed. You were ecstatic that cops were watching you every goddamn second.

When it was time to get to bed, you were too nervous. The police expected your stalker to show up, and although you had acquired the gun, you didn't feel safe even the slightest bit. Holding the heavy piece of metal in your shaking hand, you gulped down water from the glass and layed on the bed, watching the door. No one would hurt you. You had a gun, a group of cops waiting right next door, and your cousin who rented a room in a hotel next to your building. You were safe. You just had to stay awake before this sick motherfucker showed up.

But when he did, you slept very soundly with your head on the pullow, your gun on the bed sheets close to you.

When you woke up, that morning became your worst nightmare. Your gun was gone. The toilet seat was up again.

How outrageous you had been when you found out all your supposed guards had fallen asleep last night, drugged by something they didn't even know. Of course, there was nothing on the cameras. In fact, there were no cameras left in your apartment and the corridor whatsoever because your stalker had them all removed without even showing himself. How did they do it? What superhuman being did they had to be to twist both the police and you around their finger?

Well, maybe it was exactly the case. This intruder was too extraordinary. What if it wasn't you they were after? What if they were really trying to challenge Captain's America authority? And you were just unlucky enough to become a victim. You were picked most likely because you had a routine you had been following for a long time, and it made you an easy target. In the end, this intruder didn't rape you. He didn't hurt you. He didn't steal from you. He was coming to, what, lay close to you on the bed? Put up a toilet seat? No, it wasn't your attention he was after. He wanted to be acknowledged by the hero everyone was crazy about. Maybe he was like those girls who kept making the photos of Steve's balkony.

Once the realization hit you, everything became so much better. If he wanted the attention of Captain America, he would get it, Kate had assured you. How did she discover what was happening and how she could make him aware of your situation you didn't know, but soon those scary men dressed in black were walking the corridors of the building instead of policemen. Cameras were set up again while you were guarded at all times. Captain was returning tomorrow, you were told.

They wanted you to stay in the apartment, still. Actually, they clearly implied that you'd be put there regardless of your own wish because it was for the best. They were not some incompetent policemen, they said. You'd be protected regardless of what was going to happen to your stalker. This time you were ready to believe them - these guys looked like they could crack man's skull with just one hand - but your cousin insisted you had to do something, too. Funny enough, she gave you a teddy bear and told there's camera inside it. You could see everything it recorded with your phone.

Well, it couldn't hurt, could it? You placed the bear on one of the shelves just to make her feel better.

But nothing happened during the night. For some reason, you slept like a rock again, but there was no indication the intruder had been in your apartment. You called your new guards, and they confirmed everything was clear. They were confused with your sleeping habits, though. It was odd you could sleep so soundly during such moments.

Well, maybe that was it. Captain America was coming today, and now the intruder knew they were going to have his full attention. Maybe it was enough for them, and you would be set free after all those weeks of torture.

"I still can't believe he didn't show up last night." You said nervously and wiped your forehead with the back of your hand. "I know it's stupid, but I feel like someone's going to jump at me when I'll be leaving the building."

"It's not stupid." Your cousin sounded concerned. "You're the bravest person I've ever met. I'd ask all those guys to go fuck themselves if they wanted me to spend one more minute in that place."

"I know, I know." You forced a smile as if she could see you. "But nothing happened, you see? I really think that... person wanted Captain, not me."

"You can't know it for sure, honey. You have to be careful before they catch that motherfucker, ok?"

"Yeah, yeah. I promise."

"Good. I'm going to buy some food, so I'll give you a call in half an hour."

"Sure! Please take care too."

"Of course!"

She hung up, and you were left alone with your thoughts again. You stared down your phone, thinking about all the things that happened to you. You wanted to know who was doing it to you more than anything else. Who was that person? The police said it was most likely to be a man in his thirties. What was his name? How did he look? What made him do all these things to you? Did he mock you for your stupidity when you didn't even realize he was always so close to you all that time?

Rubbing your eyes, you thought of the cameras and that teddy bear sitting on a shelf. Suddenly, you got curious how you looked in your sleep, what that intruder saw when he entered your apartment late at night. You opened the app on your phone without a second thought and pressed your finger to the screen to see the recording.

It was peaceful. You didn't snore and didn't move on the bed, laying there as if you were dead. Your drool wasn't running onto the pillow, and you were oddly glad you almost looked like a sleeping beauty. Well, at least at night your face didn't look so tired.

Then you saw the door on your screen moving. You chocked on air, staring at the tall muscular man entering your apartment so carelessly like he lived here too. What was this? How could it happen? They said no one entered your apartment last night. They said no one was even close to your door!

The man was wearing a cap that didn't allow you to look at his face, a dark blue bomber and jeans flattering his muscular figure. He was even bigger than those men guarding you, and you gasped when he stared directly into the camera as if he knew there was one in the teddy bear your cousin brought. But nothing shocked you as much as the face of the stalker.

It was Steve Rogers, the very same Captain America everyone loved and respected. He took of his shoes quietly and then left his bomber on the rack. When he turned his face to the camera, he was smiling and walking closer to it slowly like a predator knowing its prey couldn't escape.

He took the stuffed animal in his hands and brought it closer.

"I'm so glad you're watching, honey."

You whimpered, a tear running down your face. No, it couldn't be true. It just couldn't. He was supposed to be the hero, not some deranged stalker ruining your life.

"Sorry for being later than usual, but you've made it a bit harder for me, you know that?" His smile was so sweet it could make you think he's talking to his fiancee, not some girl he was stalking for god knew how many months. "But don't worry, I'm not blaming you. I know it's been tough for you too, honey."

He glanced back at you sleeping on your bed and came closer to you. You held your breath and clamped a hand over your mouth in horror.

"It's actually my fault because I shouldn't be doing this before marrying you... but I just couldn't help myself. You're not mad at me, are you?" You realized he was laying down the bed with a teddy bear in his hand, and then you saw him kissing your forehead. "I know you're not. Thank you, sweetheart."

Looking at your phone with terrified and tearful eyes, you felt like you couldn't take it anymore, but something inside you forced you to keep watching when Steve had gently lowered the straps of your top and planted an open-mouthed kiss on your neck, massaging your breast. You wanted to drop the phone to the floor, to throw it out the window, to break it against the wall, yet all you did was gawking at the recording with watery eyes and sobbing. He was insane. You saw it in his eyes - he wasn't going to question his own actions. Steve Rogers was sure he did the right thing when he broke into your apartment.

"You probably gonna have some questions when you'll see the recording." He continued as he put the toy on the bed to make you see better all the things he was doing to you. "You have never woken up at night because I've been giving you some medicine, but don't worry, it's perfectly organic and doesn't do any harm to your body." You felt your stomach twisting. "Sometimes if you forgot to drink water from the glass I had to press a cloth dampened in chloroform to your face. I don't like doing it, so please remember to stay hydrated before going to bed, honey."

You wailed like a child, rubbing your eyes with one hand and having a phone in the other. Why was it happening to you? What had you done? You had never met Steve Rogers in the first place. How did he know about your mere existence?

"But I won't need to keep doing it since our honeymoon is so close. Once we get married, we won't have to do anything like that anymore. I know you're tired of waiting, and I'm sorry I couldn't make it earlier." He kissed the top of your head and inhaled the scent of your hair. "We'll be leaving tomorrow. As for tonight, you'd have to sleep alone, but I'll be right here with you, so please don't worry."

Confused, you saw him moving with the teddy bear in his hand - the man left your bed and put the straps of your top back on your shoulders, covering your body with a blanket. He kissed your cheek one last time before returning the stuffed animal to its place and putting his bomber and shoes back on, but then...

Then he layed down on the floor and got under your bed. Though you kept watching the recording, you saw nothing else before the sun rose and you started waking up finally. You played the video further on, but nothing was happening still except you walking out to meet those men who were supposed to keep you safe. When you came back, you ate your breakfast and called your cousin.

You dropped your phone on the bed and stared at your legs, shaking so much your knees were knocking together.

He was still waiting for you under your bed.

Part 2

Tags: @finleyjayne @alexakeyloveloki @helenaeisenhower @villanellevi @hurricanerin @void-hoechlin @abyssaint @lovelydarkdaydream

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#steve rogers x reader #steve rogers #dark steve rogers x reader #dark steve rogers #captain america #yandere

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yandere-ac · 4 years

Note

I noticed in the recent update that there was a net to keep the MC from swimming too far *cough escaping cough*. It got me thinking about what if the MC- in guise of trying to find more creatures- finds an opening big enough for them to squeeze through and almost escapes. I'm not really sure which villager/character would fit best in this situation though.

Okay so like anon, not to be like that but I would dIE FOR YOU! THIS IDEA IS SO GOOD!!! YOUR MIND! ITS TO POWERFUL ANON! But yeah this was really fun to write and I choose my two favorite bitter ex boys both wanted the same poor representative. You guessed it, it’s out boys!

Yandere Tom Nook X Reader X Yandere Redd

Hole

Sneaking. You were sneaking. It was a beautiful summer day, kids were outside playing, some were out fishing or catching bugs. But where were you? You were sneaking like a teenager trying to get past their overprotective parents. You didn’t want to sneak but you had no choice. Ever since Redd first showed up on the island Tom had been more protective than ever. He didn’t want you to wander off without him, he wouldn’t let you go outside without his permission and sometimes he would want you to sleep in his house. You used to love Tom but nowadays he was just too overbearing for your comfort. You and Tom never really said out loud that you loved each other and you never did any couple-stuff. But both of you knew, you both were in love. Or, that’s how it used to be at least. Any and all feelings for Tom that you had gone right out the door once you lost control of your life.

“Y/N? Where are you going, dear?” Shit. He had found you, he had heard you. And now he was gonna stop you. “I-umm...I was just gonna go outside and search for some sea creatures for blathers” you said, trying and failing to mask the fear and worry in your voice. “Oh? Is that right...hmm...well do you need to do that? I mean, what if you drowned? What if you got attacked by a shark or octopus? Or worse! What if Redd showed up!? You remember what happened last time right? Do you want that to happen again?!” Tom asked you, you knew very much what had occurred between you and Redd, in fact just thinking of it sent shivers down your spine and formed a pit in your stomach. But at the same time, you didn’t want to stay with Tom, you’d be lying if you said that he didn’t scare you at times. Sometimes at night, you’d hear him mumbling things in his sleep, things that made every part of your brain scream to run away and never return, yet your body refused to listen. You worried about his well-being and especially now since he seemed almost obsessed with you. “Tom, listen...I haven’t been out of the house without you for some time now and I was just hoping to have some privacy. You know I’d never wander too far off” you grabbed one of his hands, taking your other hand to gently stroke his cheek. You felt him lean into your touch as he closed his eyes. These were the moments you missed, the tender, loving gestures that you and he would exchange. But now, these moments were just a way of getting you out of his intoxicatingly strong grasp. You didn’t want to stay with Tom, not in the slightest, that Tom whom you once loved died when he started limiting your freedom.

“Mmm...oh well...I guess if you know what you’re doing. Then sure, you can go out for a while yes, yes?” He said, this brought an actual smile to your face as you gave him a hug to which he giggled in reply. “Alright! I’ll see you later Tom!” “Be careful!”

And so, you were off. You ran straight to the shop to buy a wet suit, and then you ran straight to the water to do a cannonball. You laid in the water for about twenty minutes before rising up and swimming around. You didn’t bother trying to climb over the net, you knew it was useless as any major disturbance on the net sent a notification to Tom and inform him of your apparent escape. You learned that the hard way. So instead you just tried to relax for now. Later you might visit some of your residents and maybe go talk to sable, it has been a while since the two of you talked. But for now, you were trying to find sea creatures to give to Blathers. That was until you saw something that made your eyes squint before going completely wide once you realized what it was. It was a hole! A big hole in the net! Big enough for you to fit through without alerting Tom! You could escape! You could finally leave this hell!...but...what would happen to Tom if you left, you worried what he might do to himself or the others if you leave...no...you can’t think like that! The reason Tom is unwell is because of you. The only way he can heal is if you stayed away from him, if you didn’t, his obsession would only get worse.

You swim closer to the edge of the net and Closer to the hole. Looking at it you could indeed conclude that It was big enough for you to fit through. Hastily yet carefully you went through it. Making sure not to touch anything on the way out. If you did, it would be game over. Tom would see that something, you, were trying to get through and he would lose it. That’s what made you afraid. But you just couldn’t care right now, you were done sacrificing your life for other's happiness! It’s your time to be a little selfish. To look out for yourself! Carefully navigating your legs out of the hole your whole body was now out, you were out. You could barely believe it! But you wouldn’t stick around to see if Tom saw it or not. You had a plan. There was an island a bit away from yours, which would normally take about five minutes with a plane so it would maybe take about twenty minutes to swim. If you could hold out and keep out of dangerous water, you could make it. You would either make it or drown. Either way, there was no turning back now.

As you were swimming briskly, you started to rethink your decision a little. I mean, abandoning all your friends? And what would happen with Tom? Would he become unfit to take care of Timmy and Tommy? You didn’t want to consider that scenario, you wanted to believe that he would get help. But it was hard when you had experienced how deep his possession over you had gotten. After about halfway there you realized how far away the other island truly was, your arms got very tired and you had swallowed what felt like a ton of seawater accidentally as you had swum. You’re honestly starting to give up hope of reaching the island in time. You were gonna drown. You were gonna drown. You were never gonna see your friends again, never gonna find a significant other, never get married, settle down, get a pet fish with said significant other. Never gonna- Wait...is that a...boat? A little boat, sailing off in the distance caught your attention. Maybe there was still hope! Maybe there was a chance of survival! You had to do something, anything, you had to get its attention.

“HELLO!!! IM HERE!!! PLEASE HELP ME!!!” You shouted at the boat. And as if on cue, it turned around and went over to you. Yes! You had done it! You were gonna survive- Wait a minute...you recognized that boat...was that...oh god, it was! That was no other than Jolly Redd's boat. He was even worse than Tom! You had no time to think before the boat arrived in front of you. “Well well well...if it isn’t my favorite human! What are you doing all the way out here cousin?” He asked you, his voice full of glee, knowing you would need his help. “Get away from me Redd!” You said you didn’t want anything got to do with him. “Oh really? What was 'please help me' about then? I just wanna help Y/N, I don’t know why you’re getting so defensive about this. Now tell me, why are you all the way out here in the middle of the Ocean?” He asked you. Tilting his head while resting his chin above his hand, huge grin present on his face. “...ᴵ ʷᵃˢ ᵗʳʸᶦⁿᵍ ᵗᵒ ᵉˢᶜᵃᵖᵉ ᶠʳᵒᵐ ᵀᵒᵐ” “huh? A little louder cuz, I couldn’t hear ya?” “I WAS TRYING TO ESCAPE FROM TOM OKAY!!! HE PRETTY MUCH LOCKED ME INSIDE OF HIS HOUSE BECAUSE OF WHAT YOU DID!” Everything became deathly quiet as you said this. Out of all the answers, Redd had NOT expected that one. After quickly regaining his normal posture, he mustered up another smile on his lips. “Well, do ya need a ride, or would you like to swim for another forty minutes, hm?” Forty minutes? You had grossly underestimated the time that it would take for you to swim. “Get away from me Redd, I don’t want your help after what you did...” you told him, refusing to look at the smug bastard. “Oh Y/N. I don’t think you’ve comprehended this situation...you can either come with me or drown. Now I’d understand if you’d want to drown yourself, I would if I had to spend so much time with Nookie. But ask yourself, is this really the way you’d want to go out? By drowning? That’s lame!” He was right, god damn it! You hated that he was right. You were completely and utterly helpless right now and the only way to get out of this would be to accept his help.

You swallowed all of your pride and looked at him. He still had that shit-eating grin plastered across his face. “Alright, you win. I’ll come up on the ship...but as soon as we get to the island, that’ll be all okay!” As you said this, Redd's grin only got wider. He walked away for a few seconds before throwing a ladder down on the side of his boat closest to you. You could practically feel his joy as you climbed up the ladder. Once you were up, Redd immediately came up to you. Holding his hands together as he looked at you like a giddy kid to open up their presents. “Ohohohooo~ trust me Y/N, you won’t regret this!” He giggled as his movements got more jittery, almost as if he’s restraining himself. “Yeah yeah, whatever Redd,” you told him sternly. You didn’t want to be in his presence for any longer than you had to. Stepping in front of you, the fox pulled the curtain to the entrance open for you. You let out a loud sigh as you saw his dumb gesture. “God, shut up Redd,” you said as you walked inside, you knew he was joking. But jokes were supposed to be funny. And you hated him. “Ah come on Y/N you know I’m just yanking your chain here! I know you can fend for yourself! I’m not like good old nookie-“ “stop!” “Stop what?” Redd looked at you in confusion. “Stop trying to make yourself look better by comparing yourself to Tom! You have no right considering you’re the reason he’s like that! I know what your doing Redd! I’m never gonna join you! So quit trying, let’s just get a move on” you said aggressively, only to be met by the deep chuckles of the fox behind you. Blocking the exit. “What are you laughing at!?” You fidgeted with your hands as you backed up slightly. But it was no use since Redd blocked your exit. “Oh, cousin...you haven’t seemed to have gotten what’s happening right now...I don’t CARE If you want to come with me! You’re coming with whether you like it or not! We’re not stopping at some island. You have nowhere else to go, besides into my arms! So why don’t you make this easy for the both of us and just comply would ya?” Oh...oh no...oh god! He was being serious! “Wha...i...”

As soon as he approached you, you bolted off onto the deck. You knew you couldn't get away but you would rather drown than let yourself become some toy to this maniac. But before you could jump off the boat, Redd ran up behind you and hastily scooped you up by your arms. You thrashed and struggled but it was no use. He was so much stronger than you. “Ah Ah ahhh~ you wouldn’t want to do any myths rational now, would you cousin?” He said in a teasing manner. It made you even more irritated than you were scared. And so, you elbowed him right in his face. He instinctively dropped you as you did this but he quickly grabbed your leg and threw you back onto the deck before Anything could happen. There you laid, on the floor with a rage full fox above you. He was still mumbling curse words under his breath as his face still hurt. But he didn’t care, he just grabbed you roughly by the hand as he dragged you inside. You were being pulled to the furniture part of his boat, all while trying to punch, scratch or halt Redd. But nothing worked. Soon it dawned on you where exactly he was taking you. He was taking you to the big iron door at the back of his boat. The one looming door that had a giant padlock on it. “I wanted to do this the easy way Y/N! Trust me, I did! But if you’re gonna act like this then I’ll simply have to do it the hard way!” He yelled as he threw you up against the wall. The impact made you fall down and lose part of your consciousness for a few seconds. While you were trying to regain yourself, Redd opened the padlock with a key. As he turned around he saw what you were trying to do, you were trying to crawl away. You were failing, of course, the meek attempt made him chortle as he now calmed down a little. “Oh Y/N...” he said softly as he picked you up, looking right into your eyes as he continued. “You can’t escape, and no one is coming for you. Better make yourself comfortable because the ride home is long” while he told you this, he walked in the room. It looked like a bedroom. In the middle of it was a mattress, did...did he plan to do this? How long had he planned to kidnap you!? He placed you on the bed and kissed you on your forehead. You tried to protest but only weak movements and a small groan came out. Redd walked to the door but just before he closed it he turned to you, eyes gentle and seemed very genuine. “Sleep well...”

That was a couple of hours ago. Redd was now steering the boat and was whistling to himself in glee. He got you, he finally got you! And he didn’t even have to do anything, you were just served to him on a silver platter. But before he could think of anything else he felt a powerful wave hit the entire ship. It sent him falling down to his knees. Some madman had crashed into them! Walking outside with violent steps Redd was getting ready to curse out whoever had driven into them. “HEY! WHAT'S WRONG WITH-“ he quickly shut up once he saw who was in the boat. In the boat that had driven into his side sat a very angry tanooki. It was Tom, as he looked at Redd the glare he gave sent shivers down Redd's spine. Let’s just say, if looks could kill, Redd would be dead where he stood.

“Redd! Where is Y/N!” Tom asked, well it was more of a demand. “How did...how did you find me” Redd was completely and utterly baffled. He was out in the middle of the ocean, yet Tom had managed to get to him. “Where is Y/N. I know they’re here so quit acting stupid and tell me where they are!” Tom was raising his voice more and more as he got madder and madder. Redd has taken everything from him once, he wasn’t gonna let him take it again. “No chance nookie! Don’t you think there’s a reason they’re out here? Maybe it’s because they hate you! Maybe it’s because they hate that you act like a restrictive psycho! Have you ever thought of that Tom! Huh? Huh?!” Redd was now leaning over the railing of his boat. He was almost face to face with his bitter rival. “SHUT UP! SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP REDD! I HATE YOU! I-“ Tom grabbed ahold of Redd's shoulders and pulled him down, into the water. “HATE YOU!!!!”

You were peacefully sleeping as the now slightly wet tanooki walked up to your tranquil form. He kneeled down and stroked your cheek, as he smiled to himself. Poor Y/N. Such a sweet individual didn’t deserve to be touched by someone as sleazy and dishonest as Redd. Thus he picked you up and walked over to his motorboat. You were going home.

“Helloooo....wakey wakey...Y/N dear? Can you open your eyes?” You could hear a distant voice say but it was very blurry. Lifting your eyelids open felt like lifting iron weights, but as soon as you caught a glimpse of who was next to you your eyes went wide open with fear. “TOM!?” You threw your body away from him. Backing up until your back was up against the wall. “Ah your awake now, good...you’ve been sleeping for quite some time now. I’ll be honest, for a minute there I thought you were dead” he laughed a little to himself as he said this, a laugh which at one point you thought was adorable but now struck terror right into your chest. “Silly me...oh! Now that you’re awake, are the chains too tight? Do you want Me to loosen them for you?” He asked you. What? You had been so preoccupied with the fear that you hadn’t realized that you did indeed have chains and chuckles attached to your wrists. They were very long so you weren’t exactly chained up to the wall, but they were just short enough so you wouldn’t be able to move around too much. This is when you started hyperventilating. Why were you here? Where was Redd? How did Tom find you?!

“Oh! No no shhh, don’t worry, I’m here, I’m here...Redd won’t ever get you...I made sure of that...” what the hell did he mean by that!? “H-how did you find me?” You asked him, voice quivering just like you were. “Oh Y/N, did you think that the net notifications were the only way for me to see if you escaped?” He said as he petted your head. He hadn’t been so certain whether it was necessary to implant that chip in you, he thought that he could trust you enough but it would seem that he really couldn’t. “By the way, thanks for bringing that up. I’m sure by now you’ve figured out your punishment for trying to leave me. Don’t think just because I’m happy I got you back that I’m not angry, that I’m not sad, that I’m not heartbroken that you would ever think to escape from me! I just want you to be safe and this is how you repay me!” His tone got a little angrier towards the end but he quickly gathered himself in front of you. He sighed as he pinched the bridge of his nose. “You hurt me Y/N...but I’m happy you’re alright...and your safety is the only thing that matters right now,” he said as he snuggled up to you. The tanooki was madly in love with you. He wanted you to be with him for the rest of his life. He had tried to do it with you being free. But it had seemed like he couldn’t trust you with that freedom. So, he would have to lock you in, cage you up, keep you with him. Whether you liked it or not. He was gonna be with you. By this point tears had started to well up in your eyes, your whimpers getting stronger once Tom started cooing you, stroking your hair.

“Don’t cry Y/N....I...I love you...”

He said it. He had said it. The three words that you had dreaded him saying. Up until now. You could have just pretended that Tom was just a very protective friend. But now...now? He had admitted to loving you. You couldn’t back out now. You couldn’t keep that level of comfort in that Tom wouldn’t do anything to engage a relationship, but now it was only a question of when he would actually start proposing ideas of dates and stuff. You were doomed. Doomed forever with this possessive, lovesick man. You couldn’t handle it.

You started sobbing. Tears that had threatened to spill started pouring out. The only thing you could do was bury your head in Toms's neck, closing your eyes and hoping this was all just a nightmare. That you would wake up and all of this would’ve just been a dream. But it wouldn’t, this was your life now. And you wished you would have just chosen to drown instead of joining Redd.

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angst-fairygodmother · 3 years

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Could I get “Why? Because I don’t want you to get hurt, that’s why!” and “I won’t lose you too.” for Luba x Reader (because I'm in an angsty mood)? Pretty please?

A continuation of Scrapes, picking up the morning after. A/N: It was really a Luba night for me. Thank you so much for these prompts, because they led to a conversation I didn’t know these two needed so badly to have. I hope you enjoy! Word Count: 1423 Rating: T - Angst, references to major character death, references to violence, non-sexual nudity, spoilers for the movie

Luba groaned, stirred from slumber by the buzzing of someone calling. He looked down at you, snuggled into his arms, face buried in his chest, and tried to ignore the grating sound of the phone. But whoever it was, evidently couldn’t take a hint. Every time he thought it was over, it started vibrating again.

“What?” he hissed, finally answering the damn thing so they would go away.

“Oh! Luba, I wasn’t expecting you to answer Y/N’s phone,” Alexi said, sounding nervous.

“They’re still sleeping, thank god. The studio had better be burning down, for you to call so early.”

“It’s almost 10, Y/N usually comes in by quarter after. That’s why I’m calling.”

“I am too tired for this. What’s going on?”

“I assume you know about their stunt last night…”

“Yes,” he was getting very annoyed.

“Well when I got here to unlock this morning, the guy was hanging around. Skulking might be a better word actually. Across the street like I wouldn’t notice him.”

“What guy?”

“The guy. The one they got in the fight with.”

Luba inhaled sharply. There was only one reason that guy would be hanging around your studio still, or again. He had decided your business was unfinished.

The world was spinning and he struggled to draw air into his lungs.

“I’m kinda freaked out, and I called some people I know to...take care of it, but it’s probably not a good idea for Y/N to come in today. I’ll call any clients on the calendar, just…”

“I’ll keep them safe,” he promised.

“They really lucked out finding you, Luba,” Alexi said by way of goodbye.

The line clicked, and it was silent again, except for the sound of your soft snores. He traced the upturned line of your face, fingers skipping whisper-like over the sterile strips at your brow and temple.

“I won’t lose you too,” he whispered, firmer than he felt, as he wrapped his arm around you and drew you as close as he could. He didn’t bother to try and sleep again, knowing if he did, he’d just be plagued by nightmares and disturb you, and too afraid at the moment to let you out of his sight.

Upon waking, you immediately sensed that something was wrong. Bleary-eyed you groped around in the bed for Luba, only to find it empty. You shot up in a panic, not bothering to so much as wrap a blanket around your bare shoulders as you stumbled to your feet. Luba never got up before you.

You found him in the kitchen, calmly making tea, an array of pastries from the bakery around the corner on a plate next to him. Without thinking, you threw your arms around his neck, nearly spilling scalding water on yourself.

“Well good morning to you too,” he chuckled, pulling away to look up and down your naked form.

“Don’t scare me like that,” you said, planting your hands on your hips.

“I’m sorry, love,” he pouted prettily up at you. “I woke up early, so I thought I’d make breakfast in bed. I didn’t think you’d worry, not having me there beside you.”

You could tell by the lilt in his voice that he wasn’t exactly taking the issue seriously.

“I just...I thought...well I don’t know what I thought, but…” you sighed in frustration, unable to put into words the feelings that had hit you in that moment.

Realizing how genuine your worries were, he sobered, rubbing his hands up and down your arms soothingly.

“I’m sorry, love. I didn’t mean to spook you. Go back to bed, and I’ll be in in a moment, after I make new tea.”

As nice as a lazy morning of breakfast in bed, which would probably lead to other things in bed, with Luba sounded, you shook your head.

“I can’t,” you said regretfully. “I have to get to the studio soon.”

“No you don’t,” he reassured you, beaming. “I already cleared it with Alexi for you to play hookie.”

“You what?” you didn’t want to believe what you were hearing, that he had gone behind your back like that.

“I just thought...with your face kinda messed up, and it looks terrible this morning darling, not to mention your other bruises...and it’s been so long since we had a day together, so I asked Alexi if you really needed to go in. They said no. So, we have the day for breakfast in bed, and cuddling, and maybe a good, long session? I’ll have to be gentle with you, but I think I’m up for the challenge.”

“You had no right to do that!”

“What is the big deal?”

“The studio isn’t just a job like the club is for you. It’s my career. If my clients think I’m a flake, they’ll find someone else. And if I lose that…” there’d be nothing left for you, you knew that but you didn’t want to say it. Your heart, your soul, your life savings. Everything had gone into setting this up.

“It’s one day, Y/N. Don’t get so wound up.”

“I don’t care if it’s an hour, Luba! I am the only one who gets to make the choice of me skipping my obligations. Not you. And I know you know that so I don’t understand why you would do this.”

He opened his mouth to speak and you held up a hand to stop him.

“The real reason this time. I know you well enough to know when you’re lying to me.”

“I’m sorry, alright?” he snapped, turning away from you and hunching defensively.

“No, not alright. I don’t want an apology, I want to know why.”

“Why? Because I don’t want you to get hurt, that’s why!” his eyes blazed with rage and tears as he yelled at you.

“What?” you frowned. He had never spoken to you like this before. You weren’t sure if he had spoken that way to anyone actually. You felt like your heart was threatening to tear itself in pieces at the look on his face.

“You slept in, which you never do unless you’re sick, so I know your injuries are worse than you’re pretending. And then Alexi called and said the guy that fucked you up was hanging around the studio when they got there. And it scared me shitless, so I decided I had to keep you here, away from him.”

“Are...are you sure?” your voice had involuntarily dropped to a whisper. The information he gave scared you, even if you didn’t want to admit it.

“That’s what they said. And before you start losing it about them being alone, they said they’d call someone. And even if they don’t, I don’t care,” he shook his head. “No. If you ask me to pick between them and you, my pick is always going to be you. I didn’t make sure Naadirah came home, or stayed with me where I knew where she was. And now she’s buried by a lake and I’ll never get to tell her I’m sorry, and I can’t do that again.”

“Luba…” you reached for him on instinct, as his perfect mascara ran in rivulets down his face.

“It’s no wonder she chose the Dummy over a useless shit like me. I couldn’t protect her. I couldn’t do anything. I didn’t do anything.”

“Luba, that’s not true. You did so much for Naadi, and she knew, and she would never want you to blame yourself.”

He laughed bitterly, sniffling. “I think she would. But that’s not the point. It’s too late for me to fix that. But it’s not too late for you. I don’t think I’m the kind of bastard that gets lucky and gets three loves of their life, and I don’t want a third anyway. I just want to not fail both of the ones I did get.”

“Oh Luba…” you wrapped him tightly in a hug, tears now running down your cheeks as well. “I had no idea…”

“Please don’t leave me, Y/N,” he mumbled into your neck as he clung to you.

“Never,” you promised, just as anchored to him.

The kettle whistled, and Luba stretched to switch it off without fully letting you go.

“We can have tea, and breakfast, later,” you murmured, smiling softly and already lacing your fingers through his. “Let’s just go back to bed for a bit. It’s much easier to hold you when you’re not twice my height.”

#oof this was heavy #but you did say you were feeling Angsty #and I like how it came out #except the ending. I'm never good at endings #Luba x reader #Break My Heart Right #Mute (2018) fic #past Luba x Naadirah #queued to put some space between fics

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emeraldeyes23 · 4 years

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Fictober/Fantober 2020 - Day 7 - Sick Day

"Eiji!" When Ash had heard something break in the kitchen, he had run over within seconds, only to find Eiji lying on the kitchen floor, unconscious. It had scared the hell out of him. He had checked for any sign of injury because of the broken glass shards lying everywhere but had found none. Instead, he had realized that he was burning up. So, he had carried him to their bedroom and had put him into bed again. Since he had been shivering and he couldn't find a blanket, he had put him into one of his warm hoodies. It looked ridiculous because they were much too big for him, but he couldn't help but smile for a moment. Eiji seemed so cozy and cute. "A- Ash?", he croaked out. Eiji's voice sounded hoarse and nearly failed him. "Yes, it's me. Goddammit, Eiji, don't scare me like that!", Ash shouted a bit too loudly, glaring at him furiously. Despite his anger, Eiji never looked scared. Instead, he smiled weakly at him, having noted the fear in his voice. Even Ash had heard his voice trembling at the end. At this point, Eiji knew only too well that his outbursts were a sign that he was genuinely worried about him. He just wasn't capable of showing his real emotions. Most of his life, he had only learned to suppress his feelings, to bury them deep inside of him. In his cruel life, feelings were a weakness that made you vulnerable and killed you in the end. He had tried to show more of his emotions towards Eiji, but it wasn't easy for him... Still confused, Eiji slowly opened his eyes again, looking at him. Ash had placed a cold cloth on his forehead to stop the fever from getting worse. Then, he had sat at his bedside and had watched over him carefully, making sure he didn't get worse. Ash put a hand across his face and sighed in frustration. He should have noticed that Eiji wasn't feeling well. Judging by the high fever, Eiji had probably hidden his discomfort and cold from him for some time. Damn idiot. Eiji looked pale as a sheet and looked so exhausted he could barely keep his eyes open. The way he groaned in pain while rubbing at his temples, he probably had a massive headache. Cold sweat was visible on his forehead, and little droplets were running down his face. When he took his hand, he noticed they were sweaty as well, and he was still shivering despite the warm room temperature. Ash cleaned his sweaty face again and put another cold cloth on his forehead. He could see how Eiji relaxed, so it was helping him to feel a bit better. Ash wanted to touch his cheek to comfort him but hesitated, stopping in mid-air. He frowned, wondering if he was allowed to touch Eiji in a situation where he wasn't feeling well. Maybe he would hurt or scare him... Eiji had taught him that his hands could not only kill and hurt people but also comfort and heal people. At the beginning, he hadn't believed him, but he had eventually noticed how his touch made Eiji relax and how he always leaned into his touch. He had never learned kind gestures, so he had started copying the ones Eiji used on him. Still, he often hesitated, still afraid to hurt Eiji. Eiji smiled knowingly at him, lifted his hand and intertwined their fingers. It was Eiji's way of showing him that his touch would never hurt him. Ash tried again, touching his cheek while his features relaxed again. "How are you feeling?" "I'm f- ", Eiji began, trying to sit up but instantly regretted it, grimacing in pain before rubbing his temples in an attempt to soothe it. Ash just shook his head in disbelief and pushed him back into the cushions, gently but firmly. "Don't you dare lie to me!", Ash harshly interrupted him at once, his green eyes tightening. Anger rushed through him while he glared dangerously at him. Then, he took a deep breath to calm himself. His voice softened again, and sadness overcame him when he realized that Eiji always took good care of him but now that the tables were turned, he didn't know what he was supposed to do to comfort Eiji. It always looked so easy when Eiji did it. Even so, he desperately wanted to be there for Eiji.

He'd do anything for him.

"Just let me take care of you for once, ok? I know I'm seriously bad at it, but I want to comfort and help you, too." He sat there with slumped shoulders, his eyes looking down at him but not meeting his gaze. He felt so useless in this situation; how could someone like him ever comfort Eiji?

Eiji suddenly took his hand in his and smiled faintly at him, making him look up in surprise.

"I'm sorry, Ash. I should have told you sooner. I just didn't want to trouble you with that. I felt so pathetic and weak. I didn't want to be a burden to you. You have so much going on right now, with Arthur and your fight against Dino. My cold is not even worth mentioning in comparison.", he tried to explain it to him while pure warmth was reflected in his eyes.

Eiji's words immediately made him feel better. His warm smile always healed his heart and removed any dark thoughts that had crossed his mind within seconds. He moved closer to him and gently ruffled his hair.

"Eiji, please stop saying that. You're never a burden or trouble to me. You're the best thing ever happening to me. I'm so glad I've met you. You gave me new hope and showed me that there are good people in this world who care about me. That life can also be beautiful.", he admitted honestly. He couldn't remember when he had confessed his feelings to anyone so openly before. Usually, it wasn't necessary since Eiji just took one look at him and knew what he was thinking. It was scary at times, yet he secretly loved it that they shared such a close bond.

Eiji smiled weakly at him, yawning. "But - "

"Eiji, be honest. When was the last time you slept for more than a few hours? You always wait for me to come home no matter how late it is. Even so, you still get up early every day, making breakfast for everyone. It's no wonder you're exhausted.", Ash reminded him sternly.

"I... That's not... I can't sleep unless I know you're safe." Then his eyes darkened slightly before he turned away from him, avoiding his gaze.

"I just feel useless if I don't do anything. Like a freeloader. I can't fight by your side, but I can at least take care of your gang and the apartment."

"Please take care of yourself first.", Ash scolded him lightly.

Eiji nodded quietly. He seemed utterly exhausted and couldn't keep his eyes open any longer.

"Eiji, don't sleep yet. Take your medication first." He helped him sit up a bit before handing him two pills and a glass of water. "Painkillers.", he explained. "For your fever and your headache. "You'll feel better."

Eiji took them and drank the water. After Ash had helped him lay down again, Eiji closed his eyes again and drifted off to sleep. Ash bent down and placed a soft kiss on his forehead as Eiji had done so many times to comfort him after a nightmare.

After a while, Ash lay down next to Eiji and began reading a book while watching the sleeping figure next to him. He had apparently fallen asleep next to him because he was woken up by a low mumbling sound next to him. Still dazed, he moved in that direction to make sure Eiji was safe.

However, when he moved, he heard a soft complaint next to him and followed the sound with his gaze. While he had been asleep, Eiji had shifted so that his head rested on his chest now while his arm was flung around him, as if protecting him, his hand grabbing his upper arm. He was sleeping so peacefully that Ash didn't dare to move again.

Eiji had noticed him moving because he pulled him closer and mumbled something.

"Ash... Don't leave..."

Ash stared at Eiji in surprise, then slowly ran a hand through his brown hair. He saw Eiji relax again before a small smile appeared on his face. Eiji has once explained to him that he was afraid that he'd leave without telling him and would be suffering all alone somewhere.

"Idiot.", muttered Ash but couldn't help but smile in return.

"No matter where I go, I'll always find my way back to you in the end."

#banana fish #ash lynx #eiji okumura #anime #manga #fictober2020 #fictober20 #fantober 2020 #fantober 20 #my writing #fanfiction #my fanfic #ash x eiji #fever

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guigz1-coldwar · 3 years

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'One bullet' : New chapter for "Redemption in a Spirit in a Cold War" is out !

'One bullet'

"Sometimes, I just want to be in an peaceful place with only you and no more work to stress us for good !"

Chapter Summary : After having an talk with Lazar's vision, Yirina is finally feeling determined to avenge her fallen friend and face Naga.....

To read it on AO3, click here !

Words : +3600

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Lazar...He is far more different than Adler and when I saw him even if it was only an vision, I know that I could have an better talk with him, knowing that his words towards me will bring me some kind of hope I'm trying to find in myself since the crash, something that's giving an chance to give Garrett the retribution to kill every man serving under Naga's cartel and every Perseus soldier also protecting him. Our discussion couldn't last too many time and it was in an bit of sadness to see Lazar vanish in front of my eyes before I could reconcentrate myself.

Before actually leaving the place to get myself deeper in the jungle, I have to check the map to see where the house was and what direction I needed to take to get to Naga's HQ without trying to make too much noises along the way as we were close to Naga and I was alone without any means to contact the others. With that in mind and after finishing to check the map, I was in my way to get to Naga's HQ, ready to find Adler & avenge Garrett above all, it has to be done.

During my walk through the jungle on an little dirt path that was indicated on the map, I was wondering if the radio I stoled from the first patrol that wanted to check the crash, was going to emit at one moment, been shut down since I taunted Naga himself over it in an moment of rage. I have maybe blow out an chance to know more about what are Naga's moves in the area but I will now know as I was arriving next to his HQ.

"Shit, an sniper's nest." I whispered to myself as I was arriving at the end of the dirt path, marked on the map that was actually leading to an little place guarded by an sniper. "Gotta use my knife." I took out my knife of my boot, slowly advancing to get behind the guy and then, I moved to stab right in the neck side, getting my left hand on his mouth.

"Mmfff..." His voice was hopefully muffled by my hand, avoiding him to scream and to reveal to his friends that someone was getting killed. When his body went limp, I quickly get on the ground before getting to cover.

This little nest based on an little hill for that guy was in fact, overlooking the entrance of Naga's HQ and finally able to discover more about who was awaiting me & the others. Now, it was mostly Perseus soldiers that we were going to face, meaning that it was this place Adler was to be. But with those new pieces of informations, I couldn't risk to make an solo attack on that place. Even filled with rage, it's suicide to do this. I have to wait the others but when they will be here ?

"Patrol, it's been an hour that your radio went off." An voice said through the stolen radio I had with me, breaking the long silence from it and this voice...it was Naga. "Patrol, did you check if any survivors was there at the crash ?" He demanded again, apparently forgetting that someone else did respond to him an hour earlier.

"No one survived." I started, speaking at the dead guys place, making my voice clear to him while I was staying out of sight of the entrance. "Your guys are dead, Naga." I added.

"Who is this ?" He asked, sounding confused to hear an stranger's voice, he must have forgetten my taunt.

"Someone that you pissed off too much." I replied, my eyes focused on the dirth path I arrived in.

"Ah, you must be one of the survivors of that crash." He said, sounding like he had an revelation in his head. "How was that little fall ? We didn't see too much from my camp." He scoffed and I wasn't laughing at all, nothing came out of my mouth.

"I lost an friend." I breathed, blinking with my eyes, seeing that scene again. "Do you think it's funny ?" I questioned in an serious voice.

"In fact, it's not everyday that you brought down an Huey." He told me as I quickly look towards the base entrance, trying to find if the others were there.

"You always has been like that, Naga ?" I asked him rhetorically, remembering the memory I had when I met the guy. "Without an heart ? Merciless ? Brutal ?"

"Been an warlord isn't an line of work to have emotions." He decided to give me an answer anyway. "You know, I think you're all coming from your CIA friend....Russell Adler, I believe." He continued, almost sounding funny in his voice. "I'm afraid that...you are too late."

"Meaning ?" I whispered.

"Well, you have to come to my base to see." He replied, his voice clearly saying that my attempt to know more was useless "There's something that is maybe interesting you here....an little smell from the past." He joked at the end, hearing an laugh through the radio. Why is he telling me all of this ? Do he know that I was alone ?

"You're out of your mind." I said, giving my thoughts on that man, honestly.

"Wait !" He called me an bit loud, sounding to have something in his mind. "Your voice, it's sounding...familiar." He added before hearing him sort of getting up from an chair. "Ah...so, you're our Yirina Grigoriev but I think that people around you is calling you 'Bell', is that correct ?" He demanded, knowing that he was talking to 'Bell'

"That is correct." I responded, 'Bell' is the one talking right now. "Naga, you're going to release my friend or I will personally make sure that you and all your men will suffer." I threatened him in an dark voice, also giving me pain to still call Adler an friend.

"You aren't believing those words but it seems that Adler did really messed you up." He exclaimed, an noise of surprise in his voice.

"I don't know what you are talking about." I expressed, fainting to not know anything.

"Well, you will soon find out." He affirmed in an serious tone. "To make you know, you're the first person I will not personally have my hands around their necks." He admitted to me, making some noises through his radio. "You're our Queen of Hearts alongside the MI6 agent, Helen Park." I wasn't seeing him from my position but his words meaned that he was looking to the playing cards representing me & Park.

"To be captured alive." I whispered. "Yes, I saw them too." I continued, thinking that he was maybe looking surprised on his side.

"So, you learned that Perseus has ordered everyone to put their hands on you and that MI6 agent but instead, you decided to be on the field." He wondered to me

"Why we were going to hide ?" I demanded rhetorically. "I'm not intending to hide, Naga...I will find you and I will kill you." I confessed, putting all my fear in that threat to him.

"We'll see about this, you're probably still trying to find your way in here alone, it's going to be long." He said, not thinking at one second that I was having my eyes on his camp. "We'll be the firsts to capture you and before that, your friends will suffer another fate." He added. "Stitch will...."

"Sir !" Another voice came through his radio, cutting him and surprising me in place. "We spot the CIA strike team, they're almost at 200 m from the entrance." Those words caused me to quickly check the nest, finding some binoculars near the dead sniper before looking away from the entrance. They were all here : Park, Woods, Song, Sims, Wolf, Rivas along with others survivors from the latter team.

"Shit !" I muttered at their sight, mixed between been happy to see them after all these times but also because they were going into an trap.

"I'm sorry but I will be busy to cut the skins of your friends and hang them on the trees." Naga taunted me again. "Bye bye !" He added before the radio went off completely.

I couldn't stay useless here, only watching the others getting trapped by Naga's men at the entrance. Just after the radio went off, I could see that they were preparing to ambush the others, getting in cover and opening widely the gates that are leading inside the camp. I needed to do something and since I was in an sniper nest, I should prevent the others that they were walking straight into Naga's trap.

I quickly moved to grab the SVD Dragunov the dead sniper was using before getting in position, switching between looking at where Park and the team were walking and the entrance, trying to find if anyone was going to make an move and everyone was basically in their nerves about what will happen...including me. Everything can happen at the moment this ambush will occur but, it doesn't need to have an ambush....

With an thought crossing through my mind, I couldn't let the occasion for Perseus soldiers to attack first, meaning that I will attack first. I took an deep breath, staying steady to stabilize the Dragunov and then, I pulled the trigger. The first bullet I shot flied to hit an Perseus soldier that was hiding behind an wall with his friends and seeing him getting hit send an moment of panick in the soldiers. I took an few seconds to check Park and the team, seeing them running towards the entrance.

Once I was done, I resumed to fire with the Dragunov towards the numerous enemies that was keeping the entrance before the real gunfight began, starting the fight to get Naga for real. At my position, I was providing cover to the team below me but after an few moments, I saw through the scope of the sniper rifle that an RPG was aiming at my position and when I tried to shoot him, the sniper rifle ran out of bullets....shit !

It took me an second to react and the only thing I could do was to jump off from the sniper nest, not forgetting to grab my AK-47 to get down before the rocket hit my former position. I found myself to slide on the cliff, trying to not hurt myself before I was finally at the same level about the others, quickly moving to get to them in cover.

"Hey, Yirina !" Woods exclaimed, surprised to see me as I was now in cover with him, Park & Song while Sims, Wolf & Rivas were in another cover at a few meters from us with some of Rivas's men. "Shit, you've been through hell, it seems." He stated, looking at my clothes.

"I know." I whispered, after getting myself fully in cover next to him.

"Yiri, I'm been worried." Park said, going back into cover, her eyes true to her words.

"We've been trying to contact you but you weren't responding at all." Song expressed before firying some bullets from her XM4, killing some guys in the process. "What happened ?" She asked suddenly worried, returning in cover.

"Shit...I don't know but it seems that Naga was able to see through that our helicopter was something belonging to us." I replied, focused on also blasting with my gun to provide some cover to allow Sims, Wolf & Rivas to advance an little to another protection. "We've been hit by an RPG and we crashed....an hour ago." I added, closing my eyes after getting to cover again.

"And...and where's Garrett ?" Park questioned me and it caused me to look down, my eyes still closed.

"He...he's dead, Park." I responded, feeling the pain of telling them where's Garrett now and in an instant, I could see the pain on their faces, their eyes going wide and Song at the urge of crying while Park was speechless and in the same state as Song.

"It's...no....it can't be possible." Song breathed loudly after hearing me, getting her hands off her gun, dropping it on the ground.

"I'm sorry..." I told both in an very low voice.

"Damnit." Woods chuckled, mixed between shooting with his XM4 and listening to us, he was also feeling bad.

"He...." I stopped myself, starting to hear his voice again, telling me to kill Naga with the bullet I did make before leaving to get here and it was not by staying in that cover that I was going to do it. So, I reloaded my AK-47 and then, I suddenly jump out of cover, having spot during my suppressing fire an way to maybe get to Naga rapidly.

"Yirina !" I heard Park shout as I was running to get to the way I saw before : an entrance inside an house at the left of where Sims, Wolf & Rivas were located.

I passed in front of them before arriving into safety inside the house that was more looking an armory but I wasn't really in safety as there were an Perseus soldier in it, firying through an window. We both met eyes and I made the first move, literally throwing my own AK-47 to his face before starting to run over him to try to stab him but he managed to block my attempt with his right hand but since I wasn't able to stab, I took out my M1911 to shot at him in the chest two times before finishing him off with an bullet in the head.

At this moment, another door from the house at a few meters from me was force opened by an Perseus soldier, I tried to quickly shoot him but in fact, my M1911 was out of bullets, not having reload it after that attack that killed this 'Swift'. I was then going to throw an knife at him before someone fire multiples bullets in his direction, killing him and discovering Sims with his M60 in hands.

"For fuck sake, Yirina..." He said, putting himself in cover as I was moving to get to the broken door. "You almost got yourself killed."

"And ?" I asked him, grabbing back my AK-47 in hand that I threw to the first guy. "You're striking them from the front, I'm taking Naga." I explained to him.

"It's too risky, we need to...."

"Maybe but isn't our line of work ?" I cut him straight like that, blinded by my rage to finish off Naga. "He killed Garrett but I will be the one to kill."

"Yirina, I can't let you do this." He exclaimed, sounding sure of his words.

"He got Adler and you want me to let him live ?" I questioned him, finally moving to get in cover next to the broken door in case there were someone. "Don't follow me and don't try anything, Sims." I ordered before he resign himself to let me walk away as he was reloading his M60 before going out.

"Give me back Adler !" He screamed, along with his M60 as he was going out of his cover from the house, leaving me alone.

Surprisely, the little yard that was separing me from an sort of old temple was empty of enemies, maybe all focused to battle with the others, leaving me alone to get myself prepared to face Naga himself, maybe awaiting for his men to do the job for him but knowing Park and the others, he will wait very long and it's sure that he isn't going to wait long until I put the engraved bullet into his mad brain....for Garrett.

Despite facing no resistance from Perseus soldiers, I quickly move towards the yard to enter that old temple but it wasn't the main entrance of it and of course, I continued my advance inside of it, discovering an lot of gold bars stored here....like that. What all of these things are doing here ? I didn't let myself distracted until I arrived in an sort of main room with an sort of fountain in the middle but then....

"AAAAH !" A sort of war cry came inside the room, discovering Naga charging me with an knife, dressed in the same clothes that he was wearing in my memory. "Die !" He shouted again before I could avoid that strike from him.

"You're first !" I exclaimed towards him, taking out of my knife from my boot.

"Oh, here's our 'Winter Soldier'." Naga said, discovering me in person again, saying that stupid nickname linked to me. "I'm sorry to dissappoint you but your friend Adler...isn't here ! I can say that you & me, we're the same." He added as we both started to turn around each other, pointing to each other with our knife.

"So, it was an trap ?" I snorted.

"And of course, you all fall in it." He scoffed, sounding happy of having us in here. "You know what ? Enough of the talk and...fuck Perseus's orders." He looked at his knife before having his eyes hidden by his sunglasses looking at me. "I'm going to enjoy killing you slowly." He then start to attack first with his knife.

He directly tried to make an swing with his knife but I step back, avoiding the blade of it to touch me, not even making an cut through my clothes. However, he took the advantage that I wasn't attacking to charge me again, throwing himself against me and smashing my back against the stoned wall of the temple. He continued by kicking me in the chest with his knee before throwing me next to the fountain, still making sure that I wasn't going to make an move.

"Let's see how much time you will hold your breath." He taunted me before he grabbed my head to put it in the fountain, trying to drow me. I couldn't do an thing while he was having his left hand on my neck and the other controlling my hands, making me impossible to move before he removed my head from the fountain. "You know what ? Before killing you and after killing your friends, I will surely have an big taste on what's inside those clothes."

"Go fuck yourself !" I shouted, catching back my breath.

"Shut up, little slut !" He cursed, making my head going back inside that fountain but when he put my head inside, I could hear Garrett's voice again....'Kill him'....'Kill him'....and it did gave me more strenght as he pull me out of the water. "So, you're going be my favorite whore and all my men will certainely have an chance to see how much you'll begging before you plead me to end you." He scoffed, sounding certain to have win.

"In your fucking dreams !" I exclaimed, moving my legs to kick him in the waist, breaking his control over me and allowing me to grab back my knife that I dropped after he smashed me against the wall.

At this moment, I took the occasion that he was still trying to get up from my kicks that I approached him rapidly, making an single swing towards his left hand and I managed to cut off his left hand, making it drop in the ground before I start to punch Naga in the face multiples times as he was on the ground, breaking off his sunglasses, removing his green hood to discover his face and it didn't stop me to continue my moves.

I finally stopped to punch him, letting him to bleed, leaned against the fountain on the ground, breathing anormally after my numerous punches against him. Me, I was taking out the empty mag of my M1911 to insert the engraved bullet in it.

"You & I, we're not the same." I told him, inserting the bullet in the mag while looking at him, it was the words he used before our fight. "I'm not like you." I affirmed, loading the mag back into my M1911. "His name was Garrett Donovan." I added, aiming my gun towards Naga's badly hitten head.

"Yirina !" An male voice came in and I saw Woods with Park, Song & Sims. I wasn't paying attention at outside that the fighting was done. "Don't do it !" He ordered, making me look at him with an deadly glare.

"And why that ?" I demanded from him, my voice cracking. "He killed Garrett, why I would let him live ?" I said, looking at Park & Song that was still sad about that news, they were looking to be with me, wanting me to shoot that piece of shit on the ground.

"We got orders, Yirina." Sims called me out but I wasn't looking at him, focused on seeing Naga. "He might be useful for us to have intels of where's Adler ?" He added, trying to convince me of that.

"And you really think that his fucking shithead will help us ?" I shouted, angry.

"Yirina, if you shoot, we will have no chances." Woods joined Sims in his argument as Park & Song were staying silent, feeling that they wanted to shoot Naga too, hoping to have me do it. "Please, lower the gun." He suggested again, slowly approaching me to grab my gun away from me.

"I...I..." I started, getting confused inside of me about shooting him or not but I had to shoot him...for Garrett. "AAAH....Fuck !" I screamed, angrily lowering my gun, realizing that I wasn't going to shot Naga like when I wasn't able to shot Adler's vision. I couldn't look anyone in the eyes as I was having some tears coming from mine, starting to walk towards the path I came in here.....

"Leave me....I just need to be alone....I fucked up, Garrett !"

#cod bocw #cod cold war #cod black ops cold war #cod cw #call of duty cold war #cod #call of duty #cod bell #black ops cold war #yirina grigoriev #fem!bell #helen park

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harleenfleck · 4 years

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“Despite the danger (Part 2)”

Arthur Fleck/Joker x Reader

Summary: Joker is the love of your life; despite the reputation it carries. You know that, but you don’t care, after he rescued you from a horrible hole you were trapped in. Now, you both live your lives together, but you ignore all the risks that come with being the lover of the Clown Prince of Crime.

This is the continuation. Part one here (Idk how put links in tumblr AAAAAA)

Warning: Description of violence, smut (Oh yeah), unprotected sex, oral sex, and fluff cause why not.

Words: 3.2k

Notes: OMFG I’M SO SORRY I KNOW I KNOOOW It took me about a month to post the second part, you have no idea what happened to me in all these weeks! New job, a little move, trying to survive, creative block (I’m suffering with this one), I almost itchy a scorpion, I didn't have Internet for two weeks, for a moment I thought I was in contact with someone with COVID-19 and fortunately that someone was sick from something else (Pneumonia in case you had doubts), I started to be attracted to a guy who turned out to be a criminal (HAHA later I'll tell you how this shit was over) anyway, too many weird things happened to me.

Finally I can post the second part, and the truth is that it is the first time I write smut or something in English :'0 honestly I think it was sexy, but I still feel a little ashamed (that’s the correct word?) to post it, ahhh, it's weird the feeling. But wow, I think the thing was beautiful:3 I honestly hope I can beat the creative block and keep writing more stories like that, shit, anyway, Arthur it’s my beautiful muse.

Time for thanks! Thank you to the Microsoft translator for helping me translate things I don't know into English, thank you to Lana del Rey for helping me get out of the creative block with your songs, my two neurons for not giving up and doing synapses, and thank you for your patience <3

And fuuuuckinggg agaaaain the fucking same apology, I’m sorry if I make some grammatical, spelling or writing mistakes, english is not my native language blablablablablalaaablablablaba just enjoy the porn.

Hope you like it! <3

...

He’s out of his mind.

He was yelling at his men to do the damn job, to search the whole damn city. His beauty doll is missing

You were missing, you weren’t by his side, and that was a tragedy.

He was going crazy, and how cannot be? His enemies don’t leave no clue, just the threatening note. He read it, trying to find something, some sign. But nothing.

“In every fucking corner! In every fucking street! In every fucking neighborhood! I don’t fucking care! You have to find her!”

He yelled at his men in clown masks, they were orders that were to be fulfilled. But everything was more complicated than it seemed.

“We've searched all over Gotham and there's no sign of her”

“Keep looking!” He screamed again.

The clowns have never seen their leader so tense and stressed. It wasn't for nothing. His darling was kidnapped by something he had done, and time ran. Anything could happen to you with every hour wasted in found you.

"Mr. Joker, we've searched everywhere, but there's no way to find her, do you really think it's worth it?"

“What? What do you mean by that? What are you implying about that?”

“I mean Mr. Joker, you found her in a disgraceful place... You could do that with any other slut, you can find another-”

Bang!

Before he could keep opening his mouth, that man was already dead.

"I don't have time for this stupid shit! You must don’t give a shit about my doll's past! You must do your fucking damn job!"

The rest of the clowns, seeing the violent scene, came out of the room. Joker ordered two of his men to undo the body.

Sitting on an elegant red couch, he took a hand to his face and breathe out heavily.

Where were you? Would you be ok? You’d be safe?

Every question stressed him. And he felt guilty leaving you alone, he shouldn’t have done that.

Knowing that sometimes his clowns could become useless, he got out of his seat and walked outside of the room. "If they don't find you, I'll do it myself”

He got into the car and went to Gotham.

“My y/n, where are you?”

…

Your hands behind you back were tied. Your feet too.

Could barely remember what happened to you. Hours before, you were reading a book in complete calmness, but someone broke in the house. You screamed and ran for the emergency gun, but the assailants caught you first and put a damp fabric in your face.

You slept soundly for a couple of hours, when you woke up with a blindfold. Immediately, you went into fear.

“Look! The bitch woke up”

Your eyes saw again, they took you the bandage off. Looked at some men you didn’t know who they were.

“Just look, the little whore of Joker” One of the kidnappers took you by the jaw “Are the rumors true? The Joker pulled you out of a brothel after you fuck him so good?”

A big spit came into the kidnapper's eye. You pointed very well at his face.

“Fuck you!” Was the only thing you yell to him “That's something you don't give a shit!”

The others men laugh a lot, making fun of your little defense. The affected person rubbed himself with a tissue and you realized spitting him was a big mistake.

Scared, you looked everywhere, you had to find a way out, you knew that if you stayed there, they could kill you, but there is no escape.

“What idiot would want a whore like his couple?” The kidnapper spoke as he approached you and lifted you from the ground "Although if it's true that you were a prostitute... We could take advantage of that…”

They looked at you with malevolence, you knew your Joker had done terrible things to them, and they revenge were going to drop it on you.

“No, no, no! Don't you dare! If you do, you'll be dead men!”

“Maybe, but the first one to die will be you”

They pulled out a knife right in front of you, played with this one, gently passing it down your chest and face.

They started ripping the fabric of your dress. You cried. They laughed.

Please Arthur come, come for me, please Arthur

“We are three, you're going to have to give each of us pleasure at the same time, you know what that means? Anyway, you're already experienced in that”

They took your dress in pieces, staying only in your underwear, they began grotesquely touch your body and make fun of you. You just implored that it wasn't painful and that your death wasn't so violent.

Although that was improbable.

You closed your eyes, accepting your unfortunate destiny.

A violent noise was heard, and one of the men fell to the ground.

"Leave her alone right now!"

Hearing that scream you felt in heaven, protected. You were safe. Joker was there, pointing the bastards who wanted to hurt you with his gun.

“Oh! Look who's here! Just when we were going to have our banquet, don't you want some?”

Another one fell to the ground. You tried to escape the only one left alive, but he catched you, putting the knife around your neck.

“Let her go of or you're going to regret it!” Joker screamed in a tone of voice you'd never heard before. He was heard so rude and furious, and at once determined.

“Let her go? You ruined what my men and I built for years; I'll take away what you cherish most in front you. And you can’t do anything to avoid it”

Joker's blood boiled with angry. How did he dare to hurt you?

"I won't warn you again, let her go right now, NOW!"

The guy, just for enjoying Joker's furious, put the knife down and cut your abdomen, you cried in pain. Joker went crazy, and when the knife stopped touching your skin, bullets were raining at your kidnapper.

You ran away, tripped and fell, but you could see Joker unloading the bullets on his enemy.

No enemy was left alive. You were free. But you were so scared too.

Joker looked at you, put away his gun and ran to you.

"Arthur!" You hugged him very tightly.

"y/n are you okay? He cut you, that motherfucker, I must to take you to the doc—"

"No! Please Arthur, take me home! Take me with you!"

"But y/n, you’re hurt—"

"It's nothing! I swear, just take me with you!"

Crying, you begged him to get you out of there. Joker took off his red coat and put it on you, covering you. He hugged you and both got out of there.

…

You two came home. He carried you in his arms and you hugged his chest. He left you in the bed while you still crying.

"I won't let you get hurt again, my doll" Arthur drew his fingers to your face, drying away your tears. He hurt him see you crying.

"Arthur, I thought I'd never see you again”

"No, y/n, I'm here, I'll always be here. No one will hurt you again"

You hugged him a lot, you didn't want to let him go. Despite the facade of the worst criminal of all and Gotham's worst lunatic, he saved and protected you.

Arthur left the room for a moment and came back with a medicine cabinet. He healed your wound while you were trying to relax, but that was almost impossible. Once you bandaged, Arthur lay down next to you, and you couldn't help hug him. He did the same thing, caressing your hair and smelling your scent, like the first time he and you met.

You and him slept soundly. You were so afraid you wouldn't sleep in that bed again. However, your night wasn't quiet, you dreamed of those three horrible men again, you dreamed that those men did what they wanted with you, and Arthur never appeared.

You woke up upset, in tears again.

But at the same time, you calmed down, because you were home. Arthur woke up with your crying, he immediately paid attention to you.

"What's going on? y/n, what happened?"

"A nightmare"

He took you carefully and kissed you on the forehead. You hugged him back, you clung to him, you never wanted to leave him in your life.

He really is the love of your life.

And you wanted to thank him for being.

"Arthur..."

"Yes?"

You took air, you never thought you’d be shy to ask Arthur that, even when you did this night after night.

“Could you love me, please?"

The eyes of Arthur lit up, and a big sense of desire ran through his body. But despite that, you were always above everything.

"y/n… But you’re hurt"

"Art… I’m fine, it was something superficial, it's nothing” And that was true, but on his face could you see he wasn’t so convinced “Please Arthur, I need your love”

He looked at you with concern, with silent, perhaps he feared to hurt you.

But at the same time, he looked at you with desire, in need and lust.

Arthur needed you very badly too, but he was afraid to revive your pain. However, you started kissing him, at first shyly, because you didn't know what his reaction would be.

But you knew him perfectly, you knew that with a simple touch of yours he could go crazy. He gently took you from the back of your head and quickly got on top of you. His hands started stroking your neck, your collarbone, your chest. His fingers started playing with the straps of your bra and at the same time left little kisses on your breasts.

Fear left your body, and desperately asked for Arthur.

Arthur took your bra off and threw it somewhere in the room. Hypnotized, he admired your body. You blushed, he always saw you as a deity, even though you two made love a thousand times before.

"You're the most fucking beautiful woman I've ever met"

He bit his lip when he saw you. You, on the other hand, put the shyness aside, your hands went to the buttons on his yellow vest, unbuttoning them. Arthur noticed your intentions and helped you with that. You did the same thing with his turquoise shirt, looking now his chest.

You exhaled. You kissed him deeply, his tongue entered your mouth, and you couldn't help pass your hands through his chest and abdomen.

Without warning, you started to kiss his neck and shoulders, he didn’t wait that, but with a smile, he let you continue. You kept kissing him, went down to his red pants. His lust trapped in that red pants was already evident.

With little kiss on the fabric of his pants, you unbuttoned and zipped down. You looked him before continue. Arthur looked at you in need, desire and a huge smile on his clown face.

You backed off his pants and his underwear, his length appeared on your face and something inside you burned. You took it with your hand and let a little kiss in the top.

With more desire, you pass your tongue, sucking it, you really enjoyed that moment, more when you put it in your mouth and heard his deep moan.

"Damn it, y/n!" Arthur almost cried out loud. He was wet in lust, he looked at you with his green eyes, saw as you gave him pleasure, as you loved making him feel good. He took your hair, started directing the movements.

You relaxed your throat, took some air and got on with your work. You used your tongue to drive him crazy, and hearing his moans caused you to get wet. “Fuck! y/n you… you’re amazing…”.

You viewed that he grabbed the sheets with his free hand, his head was back and his chest became large and small as he breathed deeply. You could think he was close to finishing. But he decided to change things.

He took your hair and forced you to apart himself, you looked at him a little confused, but his gaze said he was going to back to you everything you caused him. Taking your shoulders, he dropped you in bed. He quickly got between your legs, starting to play with the elastic of your lace panties.

He dropped your panties, stared hungry at what these were hiding. And he realized you were already wet.

"Art... Do-Don't be so rude, please" You pled him timidly. Arthur blinked, setting aside his desire, remembering what you had spent the last night. He looked at your reddened face, and felt slightly guilty. He didn't tell you, but he thought maybe he scared you.

"Of course not, my doll" slowly lowered his face until you reached your entrance "If you want to stop, I will, just say it y/n" kissed one of your thighs, and seeing you, started playing with his tongue inside you.

Now, it was your turn to yell.

“Oh fuck!” You remember why Arthur loved that game. He was very skillful. He kissed you, licked you, played really well down there. You took his green hair between your fingers, begging him to go deeper. You heard a little laugh.

“I want you Arthur…” You couldn't take it anymore, you started begging him, as tears of pleasure fell down your cheeks “Please Art, I want you, make me yours…”

He didn't listen to you, he just kept licking you, and you couldn't do it anymore. You cuming in his mouth, and he drank you all.

Bastard you thought You wouldn't let me do the same with you

As you recovered from the orgasm, he stands up, his makeup was already a mess, but that's what you loved, as you could see Arthur and Joker at the same time.

“Come here, boy” You extended your hand to him. He took it and placed himself on top of you "I really want you for me”

“You just want me?”

“Why the question?”

"You seem to need me" Arthur kiss your hand, as you felt the rub of its length in your entrance, he was torturing you.

“Arthur, please…”

“Please what?” He passing his tongue in your hand and finished with a kiss.

“I-I need you…”

“Yes darling?” He saw you again with those emeralds that drove you crazy. How much you love him, and how much he loves you "Did you know I always need you, y/n?" With that deeply voice, he began to play again, giving small blows with his tip, causing you to moan.

“Y-Yeah…” Your voice became trembling at the end of that word “Arthur, please…”

“Please what?” He repeated that question again while without warning, he passed his tongue through your breast, provoking you more and more.

“…Fuck me…” You didn't ask him, you pleaded him. He laughed a little, and kissed you on your lips, looking for your tongue with his. And as your tongues fluttered in your mouths, he entered in you.

You moaned in his mouth, that strange sense of pain and pleasure was so addictive to you. He moved inside you, going out and in. You could hear him moan, and that excited you more, hearing his voice full of pleasure.

With more desire, you hugged him, moaned and cried. You didn't want anyone else in your life. You only want Arthur, just him.

It was so much pleasure and delight that you even forgot the wound on your abdomen.

You raised your hips just to join him more. Arthur kissed your neck, while he too got lost in lust. The bed hit the wall hard, it could break at any time, and you wouldn't mind. You two couldn't separate, nothing could separate.

You didn't know how much time was going on, but every time Arthur made love to you, time seemed to stop alone for the two of you.

“Arthur…” You cried his name “I love you… I love you”.

“I love you, y/n” you heard his hoarse voice against your ear again. He raised his head, only to see you adore this intimate moment “I love you too”

You kissed him, so much passion overflowing. You felt close again.

Before you could tell him, your body couldn't keep it anymore and gave into the pleasure, you screamed so loud. Arthur began to penetrate you slowly and deep at the same time, prolonging your orgasm, making it more torturous and pleasurable.

Breathing deeply, you looked at Arthur, taking his cheek with your hand, you still felt weak, and loved too.

He came out of you, and he started masturbating in front of you. "Could you help me, doll?" Oh yes, you knew that meant.

You knelt in front of him, took his member and carried him into your mouth. He tried to suppress a groan but failed. A few seconds later he made you stop, and you'll look him in the eye from where you were.

"You want it, don't you, doll?" you didn't answer, you just moved your head up and bit your lip. Like the first time you saw him. You began to masturbate him and kiss his member.

He caressed your head, closed his eyes. If that wasn't heaven, he didn't know anything else it could be.

His body tightened, and his breathing became heavy “y/n, I’m gonna coming, come here”.

You stopped, opened your mouth, sticking out your tongue. With a little scream from him, you got his climax in your mouth. Every drop fell into your mouth, and some escaped through the corners of your lips. He tasted so good; you loved his taste.

Arthur took a deep breath, his eyes were still under in his eyelids, recovering. He lowered his head and opened his eyes, watching you. You gave him a naughty smile. He caressed your cheek, and stroked you with his thumb.

"Where have you been all my life?" For a moment he thought about it, but he really said it. And you blush at those words. The naughty smile was replaced by a shy smile.

"Lost, like you, my love"

Smiling at you, he went to kiss you one more, one more loving, more romantic. “Arthur Fleck, you really are the love of my life” You said to him in the middle of the kiss. You could feel it how he trembled at your words. He separated from you and looked you in the eye.

“You too, y/n, you’re the love of my life”.

He kissed your cheek and pulled aside some locks of hair that fell on your face. "Come here" Took your hand "Look at you, you're a mess, we're going to have to clean you up"

You knew that was just the beginning, it was going to be a long day.

But you didn't care because you loved him, you loved Arthur Fleck, and Joker too, despite the danger. You didn't really care about danger, Arthur would always protect you from adversity, and somehow, you also protected him.

End

#joker #arthur fleck #joker fanfiction #Joker x Reader #Arthur Fleck x Reader #arthur fleck smut #fanfiction #sexy timeeee #joker smut #lemon #Arthur fleck fanfic #joker fandom #why I'm still feeling weirdo with this? HAHAHA #AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA #Don't ask #Just enjoy it #aaaaAaaaAAAAaaaaAa

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sebs-anxiety-and-insanity · 4 years

Text

TW: Implied self harm, implied suicide, c!thomas is a sad mess, cussing

Viewer discretion is advised

Here is the song by city and colour

youtube

The way it used to be/ ThVi (its sad)

-------------------------------------------------

This is the story of a man

Thomas sat on his couch, scrolling through Twitter, replying to mentions here and there, just sitting. He felt Virgil lay down on his lap, going seemingly limp against him. Thomas put down his phone to turn his attention to his boyfriend. "You good there, Virge?" He nodded, smiling. "Having anxiety is just exhausting." Thomas sighed. "Why didn't you come get me?" Virgil shook his head. "Didn't wanna bother you, and besides, it wasn't even that bad. Now I am here with you." He turned on his side wrapping his arms around Thomas's waist. Thomas sighed in content. He knew this would be the rest of his life and he was completely happy with it.

Who took for granted everything he had

"I- I'm sorry okay? Please calm down!" Virgil said harshly not wanting to scream anymore than Thomas already had. "NO! WHAT THE HELL?!!! YOU KNEW THAT WAS IMPORTANT TO ME!!! THAT COULD'VE BEEN MY BREAK!!" Virgil shrunk back a bit. "I- I know, but-but I can't help it! Its literally my job!" Thomas huffed. "JUST LEAVE ME ALONE ANXIETY!!!!" Virgil flinched. He called him anxiety instead of his name.... Right as Thomas began to opened his mouth again, Virgil teleported to his room, locking the door.

And how he let it all just slip away

From then on, Virgil didn't act the same, flinching away from touches, hardly speaking and never wanted to be touched really. And a few months after a few more fights and awkward encounters he finally came out of his room he only grabbed a book, one Thomas had never seen before, and left. Returning hours later to say quietly that it would never happen again. And he left. Thomas would've gone after him but he had to go somewhere, and he would always be here when he gets back. Waiting for him since there isn't no where else to go.

Never to return again

He arrived back home sad? He hadn't had any anxiety which was unusual since he was surrounded by a bunch of people, bombarding him with a bunch of questions. He decided now was the time to go check on Virgil, say he is sorry and figure out why everything seemed gloomy. He went into the mind palace, and even the living room which was a neutral space was sad, not as much as everything else but still sad. He walked up the stairs, immediately noticing the bright blue door that had dogs and cats with a couple of frogs, was deepened and cracked, similar things done to the other doors. He walked down closer to Virgil's room, when he heard sobbing. Panic seeping in he ran to Virgils room only to stop dead in his tracks. Patton was crying, and was being cradled by Logan. Janus was in tears on Virgils bed, cradling a piece of fabric. He looked in the bathroom and his blood ran cold. Roman had tears steaming down while harshly talking with Remus, who was in the same state. He couldn't make out what they were saying since they were not audible from where he was. And a single limp arm dangled from the bathtub, red streaks streaming down said arm. Rushing in Roman immediately tried to stop him from seeing, but it was too late. He already saw Virgils lifeless body in a bathtub of red from his bleeding wrists. Tears streaming down his face. He faught against Roman to get to his boyfriends lifeless body. Why did this happen?

Now twenty years have come and gone

"Yeah, well fuck you! You shouldn't still be mourning him! And even if you weren't you still can't pretend I am him!" Anxietys distorted voice rang throughout the room. Thomas flinched. It's been twenty fucking years and they still didnt know anxietys name. And he still looked like Virgil which didnt help shit. He looked up to notice that Anxiety had disappeared. He sighed sitting back down on the couch, head in his hands. god what happened?

And still he wonders what he did so wrong

The next week he stayed in his room, refusing to do anything. Yeah it was twenty years ago but seeing anxiety made it yesterday. He soon created a sick little world in his head, where Virgil never died. And they just broke up. But Thomas knew there was hope of getting Virgil to get back together.

And how that he can win back *his* heart

Anxiety was now scared to be anxiety. Patton always trying to be happy, but failing from time to time, but still always vowing to protect him from such awkward encounters with their host. Anxiety would walk down to get a snack and Thomas would have a date set up for the both of them. Always calling him 'Virgil' and ignoring him saying that he wasnt this 'Virgil' he kept speaking of. And even though he failed, Thomas would always try again. He just had to win Virgils heart back. Ignoring Logan who was trying to get him to stop this behavior.

And finally step outside of the dark

Thomas sniffed the Roses he had bought which was purple, contrary to Anxietys black clothing. Satisfied with the purchase he left, waving goodbye to the owner of the shop, who had remembered his name and a few things about him, since he was in there every day.

He buys fresh roses every day

He offered the flowers to Anxiety once again, who awkwardly pushed them away and teleported out of the situation. He felt horrible, only being known for the past him, and not- ... well, him! Who even said he liked roses.

His favorite flower- so he used to say

It was the middle of the night, and Thomas was sobbing into the covers. The only time he wasn't stuck in his fake world since he was on medication which often made him forget his fake world for the night. He was sobbing, going through various memories of Virgil wearing roses in his hair. He reached over to take another swig of liquor, the all too familiar taste calming him a bit. And anxiety had to watch, since he never slept.

And now the memories are all that he has left

His drinking got more prominent, and even Remus was worried, usually his sticking thoughts and jokes would be there no matter what, but he was drained and focused on his host, not knowing what to do, but watch as this got sickening, even for him. Anxiety was on the same page as Remus, just at a lower volume. But he was the one who had to watch it 24/7 and he couldnt bare to look at his host like this.

I'm afraid he'll drink himself to death

While Thomas kinda creeped him out, Anxiety still felt bad for him, and it was still his job to protect his host. He decided to tell Logan about the rising intake of alcohol each night, slowly turning into spiked coffee, and other things. He really needed to stop...

This is the story of a man

Patton set Anxiety down, preparing himself. "Hey kiddo... I know you know that Virgil, our previous anxiety and friend, has passed... away. But I don't think, we ever told you how.... And for you to fully understand why Thomas is the way he is now, you need to hear the story, and I'm forced to tell it as Roman and Logan have been losing their minds, you know because of Thomas pretending that Virgil is still alive..." tears gathered in his eyes as he continued, telling the story as best he could.

Who took for granted everything he had

Anxiety felt bad for his past self and everyone else... he completely understood what Virgil was going through. But hearing it from his father figure made it twice as hard to pretend to be unphased by the information. This is one sad and frustrating story...

And how he let it all slip away

Anxiety didn't know how to feel for his host, anger? Or pity? He really tried to understand what had happened, but the relationship between Virgil and his host was really confusing, how could it not be? Especially towards the end...

Never to return again

Tears were now forming in Anxietys eyes as it became harder to understand Patton who was sobbing. He had lost his 'son' after all... And Anxiety felt like he lost a brother.

It's clear he moved on long ago

Thomas spiraled even further as he realized that his efforts to get Virgil back with him were futile. And he hated it. He hated it so much. He took another sip of his spiked coffee. Hoping to calm his nerves however he could. But always no matter what, when his meds arent making him somewhat sober minded, he always goes back to believing that he could somehow still win Virgils heart...

But still he clings on to the distant hope

He never slept now, even before he got atleast two hours of sleep. But that didnt happen anymore.. Thomas just stared at the ceiling as flashes of them together played through his mind. They looked so happy... Virgil looked happy...

That he'll come back and make a happy home

Everyone was spiraling as Thomas did, but it took more time for some of them. And Anxiety couldn't help because that would hurt his host even more. Anxiety decided to stop watching his host at night. Staring at the ceiling. He felt utterly useless, and he hated it. He sighed sitting up, the TV turned off, so it was playing footage of what Thomas was doing, and unsurprisingly he was still drinking and crying softly...

And now its him and the bottle all alone

As he spiraled he seemed to remember that his world was fake. And this made him unpredictable, and the others were spiraling with him, anxiety was spiraling the slowest. Which forced him to be the one always watching him. Sometimes he would look over at the TV to check on him and see him under a cherry blossom tree that had a swing hang on it. It was there he seemed the most sane. And numb, which kinda made it terrifying.

Sometimes you'll see him in the yard

You could tell by just looking at him sitting in the swing he was broken. Tears falling slowly, smiling to himself while he mumbles things to himself, something about how beautiful the imagination was. Clutching what seemed to be a purple hoodie.

A wounded man with a desperate heart

It seemed to be all he ever was, anxiety sighed sadly watching as Thomas pulled weeds from purple roses in the imagination. It seemed to be more of a calming thing, but it was still sad to watch.

He kept his Roses (hedges) trimmed nice and neat

Janus was watching Thomas with anxiety one day. Sadly noting that Thomas had replaced the area around the cherry blossom tree to replicate the way it looked when they first got together.

To keep them the way that they used to be

Thomas sat there in the swing admiring his work.

This is the story of a man

He sighed swinging back and forth a bit.

Who took for granted everything he had

After that day he seemed to be getting better, going to see a doctor about his spiraling.

And he let it all just slip away

Thomas was in fact getting better. He had stopped drink as much as he did, but it was a work in progress, and he even got a bit more comfortable around anxiety.

Never to return again

Thomas hung up the purple hoodie on his bathroom door. Just... admiring it sadly.

A single dress hangs on it's own

He would often would often smell the hoodie, it still smelled like him...

A scent of perfume all he has to hold

He remembers fading to his final sleep that night, clinging to the hoodie...

A wasted life waiting on a dream

As he closed his eyes one final time he saw him and Virgil sitting on the swing. Having fun and talking, just enjoying the others presence.

Hoping for things the way they used to be

He was happy, finally. Gone from the world he knew as pain. And he smiled.

This is the story of a man, who took for granted everything he had. And how he let it all just slip away, never to return again...

-------------------------------------------------

Not really proofread so sorry for any mistakes!!!

But uh yeah hope you enjoyed!!

#sander sides #virgil sanders #Anxiety sanders #sandersides #c!thomas #song fic #sadness #Youtube

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therealroyalfamily · 4 years

Text

!¡Warning¡!:

Cruising, men not knowing personal space, mention of killing a child, death, family drama

CHAPTER ONE

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°

The music jumped off the wall, sweat and glitter-covered their bodies as they grinded their bodies on each other, so much alcohol ran through there bloodstream that Apollo can almost taste it. From his VIP section apollo watched the two humans carefully, waiting for the right time to approach them. one male, one female

The male was muscular and tall, having a height of 6'1. he wore a plain white shirt with leather pants the hugged his legs a little too much, especially the crouch area

The female wore a short black dress that went limp towards her breast, her face showing discomfort each time the man grinds his crouch into her backside

"If you don’t stop him, I will…."

Apollo turned to his left, only to see his Best friend, Jay staring at the scene in front of him obviously infuriated by the way this man was dancing on the woman

"...Dont.." apollo says turning back to look at the two, unbothered

"How can you sit there watch this?"

"..will you shut up, you haven't eaten in 2 days. I'm trying to help you.." Apollo says calmly

".. I can feed by myself, I don’t need your help. I can control my thirst.."

"you feed on a toddler last week, you ungrateful fucking prick" apollo says, still not taking his eyes off the pair

"I-...jesus.." Jay sighed as he recalled the regretful night

The music pauses, the dancefloor becoming less crowded as people retreat back to there seats to grab refreshments and chat, Apollo watches as the man practicality drags the women to the other side of the clubs, where the bar is located

"..if you’re so mad about the situation, you can take the big guy.."

"No..you need the blood more than me-"

"I'm not a newborn, I'll be fine...come on," Apollo says, interrupting jay

He gets up from the couch and gestures Jay to follow he walks down the stairs that lead to the dancefloor, that has now regained some dancing bodies on it

They both walk through the crowd with ease as people made away when they passed, eyes practically undressing them both. Apollo not making eye contact with any of the lust-filled eyes due to him not taking his eyes off his prey contrast to Jay who made eye contact with almost all the men and women with a sly smirk, loving his and Apollos effect on people

That changed when they finally reached the bar, Jay almost instantly entered predator mode, his bloodlust and anger toward the man almost causing him to drain him of his blood on the spot

Jay stood next to the man and Apollo stood next to the woman. Caging them in their presence jay didn’t grab the man’s attention but Apollo immediately grab the women's attention.

She analyzed him she watched as his jawline flexed every time he swallowed, the way his hair messily framed his face perfectly, the way his lips glistened in bar lights.

Her mind drifted to his hands that now gripped a cup that was placed by a bartender, she fantasized how his fingers would feel inside of her with his rings, how his lips would move against her pussy she nearly at the idea, if it wasn’t for the man whose arm was on her ass at the moment, she would have shot her shot a long time ago

Apollo noticed her hesitation and soon looking at Jay. When they made eye contact Apollo signaled Jay, with a simple look

Jay turned to the man and tapped his shoulder lightly before the man can even show his irritation Jay's looks him straight in the eye and says

"Go outside and wait for me at the empty alley next to the club, Don’t talk to anyone"

The man stares at Jay dumbstruck and soon moves to leave following his every command

Jay's soon disappeared also leaving An unbothered Apollo and a relieved woman

"Whew...I thought he'd never leave" the woman awkwardly says, now turning her attention to Apollo

He doesn't move still acting more interested in swirling his drink more than the women

"I-im Vanessa, and you are?"

Apollo turns to look at the petite woman, who was visibly intimidated by his "Don’t care" attitude

"Apollo," he says sternly, and if it wasn't for his enhanced hearing, he wouldn't have heard the moan that escapes her mouth

"You okay? your turning red" Apollo asked faking his concern

"Y-yea I'm..um..fine" the women know known as Vanessa say, nervously chuckling

Silence fell between the two, Apollo was becoming impatient, he didn’t like playing with his food

"...you know…" Apollo begins

"..if you wanna fuck me, just say it. You’re holding up the line" he gestures to the remaining eyes that still whisper and stare at him

"...Bold.." Vanessa says seductively

Apollo hum agreeing, as he grabs her wrist, and drags her to the exit

The wind blow blew through her hair, Apollo can hear her heartbeat increase each time his hand grazes hers, the smell of her arousal grows thicker every second

When there about to past the dark, quiet alley Apollo stops her

"My cars down there" Apollo points down the alley

Vanessa nervously chuckles "Isn’t that a bit weird to park your car down there"

"Not if you plan to have sex in it…" Apollo says boredom laced in his voice

"Come on, I'll protect you.."

Apollo wraps his arm around her shoulder pulling her closer, she shivers due to his lack of body heat. They began to walk down the alley, Vanessa getting startled by a few rats here and there Apollo watching with amusement, finding her yelps of fear entertaining

When they reached far enough from the busy streets of Korea, Apollo turned her around and pinned her to the nearest wall trapping her with his taller structure

" I-I thought y-your car was do-down he-"

Before his prey can even finish her sentence Apollo sank his fangs into her pulse point and began to suck the life out of the poor women

Her screams muted due to Apollo’s hand squeezing her throat. His grip was so strong that he hears her bones crashing into millions of pieces. Once he was done, he pulled away from the lady, her heartbeat weak, her eyes bloodshot and her neck untouched by blood, but horrifyingly Showerd with bruises

Her body drops down to the concrete floor, with little life left

Apollo wiped his lips the remaining blood from his soft lips, he looked around hoping to find Jay coming back from his meal. But he doesn't

He sighs

He leans against the wall opposite of the now dead woman waiting for his late best friend. 15 minutes past and jay is still not here, Apollo guesses he went home with the rest of there coven and finally decides to do the same

He's halfway up the alley when his phone vibrates in his pocket, thinking its Jay, He picks it up immediately but before he can even speak, the caller does

"Apollo Young-ho Cullen!"

Fuck.

"Hey mom.."

Esme Cullen, Apollo’s mother. Not biological but she was more his mother than his real one ever was, he would do anything for that woman, anything

"..Carlisle has been trying to contact you since yesterday, what happened?" Esme says concern laced in her voice

Apollo turns back to look at his meal, still lying lifeless on the floor, as he begins to walk again

"I was busy"

"To busy to talk to your father!?"

Apollo scoffed "He’s not my father, stop saying that"

"Just because you’re older than him doesn't mean he can’t be a father figure to you, I do-"

"Mom," Apollo says sternly, signals her to leave the topic alone

"We need you.." Esme says sadly

"For?" Apollo asked weaving through to body on the street now only a few blocks away from his covens hideout

"Edward found his mate"

Apollo smiles remembering his stiff, quiet and sometimes Boring younger Brother

"I bet he’s through the roof….how does that have anything to do with me though?"

"......shes human"

Apollos smile dropped, concern and anger creeping in his voice

"And you expect me to care, because?"

"Shes your brothers mat-"

"She’s human! The Volturi can kill you all if they find out-"

"They already know!"

Apollo stays quiet taking in the information he has just received, he's family lives is in danger because his little brother decided to fall in love with a human. A fragile, weak useless human. He hasn't met said human but he can already feel hatred towards the little girl

Minutes passed before neither Esme nor Apollo spoke

The Cullen family in Forks surrounding Esme listening to their conversation, Edward shamefully looking down, Disappointed due to not having his older brother acceptance

Apollo now sat on his front porch steps, still digesting the information

"Listen, I have more things to explain but I'm afraid you'll go on a killing spree or something.."

Esme chuckles sadly

"-so when you come home, I'll explain the rest….please come home Apollo.," Esme said with sadness, longing to have her eldest son in her arms

"We need your help apollo...one last favor please?" Apollo can hear Carlisle say in the background

Apollo bottled up all his negative emotions toward the situation and threw it out the window his only motivation is keeping his family safe

"I'll be there by morning."

*Hangs up*

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forkanna · 5 years

Link

[AO3 LINK] [EF LINK]

CHAPTER FIVE

~ x JUDGMENT x ~

"That's enough."

Makoto smirked. "What's the matter? Too awkward for you?"

"Yes," Sae half-snarled, slamming her hand down on the table again. "I really have no desire to hear about my little sister's sex life. You don't need to go into so much gruesome, sordid detail!"

"Oh, I think I do." Her smirk slid off, replaced with an angry, defiant look. "You wanted this. Remember? Said you had to know the whole story. I asked you not to pry, to let me have my privacy - but it was more important you get the facts. So now you don't have any choice. I'm telling you all of it. All of it, and you will just have to figure out how to be okay with that."

For a moment, it looked like Sae might not respond at all. Then she frowned and clenched her hands over and over. "Makoto… I can't believe you're being so cruel to me just for doing my job. Trying to protect you."

"That isn't why. But you might as well just let me finish now, since I will whether you like it or not."

"That's… that isn't…" Sighing in defeat, she nodded and waved for Makoto to continue.

"Good." Brushing down the front of her skirt again, she began, "So…"

~ x The Priestess x ~

Miss Kawakami's delicate feminine hand was between my legs.

Every part of that mental sentence baffled me. It was my teacher. She was a woman. And she was wearing a French maid costume, pressing her fingertips gently against my very warm anatomy through my costume trousers. Anyone doing that was something I was totally not prepared to experience yet, much less her! This whole situation was insane and I was reasonably sure I was having a mental breakdown.

Meanwhile, there was something else to deal with.

"Oh." Miss Kawakami moved her fingers experimentally, I couldn't completely stifle a quiet moan - and her hand shot away. "Oh my GOD."

"U-um…" It was all I could get out. I mean, someone had just fondled me for the first time in my entire life, so I think I had a good excuse!

"Wh-what I mean is… oh my God, you…" Frantically scrambling for a better reaction, she petted my thigh again. "Oh my God. My master is a very, very special boy."

"Huh?!"

"Of course, I've never done this for somebody who's a- who's special." Licking her lips, she tried for a smile, but it didn't hide any of her anxiety at all this time. "But, well… I, um, I want to try! If Master wants me to."

One of my hands came up to clamp down on her wrist, to keep her hand from moving higher. "Please don't. I… it's very interesting, but I'm…"

"Master, it's okay," she told me earnestly. "That's not something that matters to me. Alright? But… if you really don't want me to, I promise, I won't go any further. Really."

That was more like the teacher I knew and respected. She had been trying to encourage me to open up, but when I looked too afraid to try more she let it go. Easily. I could have hugged her, except it would give her the wrong impression - and probably also give away my secret identity. Such as it was.

"Do you not have the money?" she asked in a whisper. "I think, since you're so special, I could… offer half price?" The awkward smile told me she was mostly trying to make me feel better rather than to earn more money. Though it was both.

"Please, I, u-um… could you draw me a bath? Maybe after a bath…"

"Of course." She patted my leg, then stood up and towered over me, hands on her hips. I could almost see up her dress… which I had no idea why I cared about. I didn't, did I? "I'll get to it right away, Master!"

Once she was gone, I managed to crawl my way up the side of the bed and onto the mattress. I wanted to cry, I wanted to throw up… but I ended up just huddling there, staring at the wall while I listened to the sound of running water.

The worst part was, I didn't even know which part was the worst part. That I was here with my teacher? That she had molested me, and it was because I had deceived her into doing so?

Or that one simple touch from her had actually turned me on? I had never been aroused before; not really. A little antsy once or twice, but only from small things, like sitting on the edge of a chair wrong. No person had ever been attractive enough to me that my interest would spark such a reaction. So why now, with Miss Kawakami?!

Because she was beautiful? Because I felt drawn to her out of sympathy for her situation? Because she was interested in me - even if it was false interest, part of her job? Because it was an intimate touch I had never experienced before?

"The bath is almost ready, Master!" she chirruped as she skipped into the bedroom. Now she was back to her usual self; it seemed the break from me had given her time to recover her professionalism.

"Thanks," I croaked, still lying there like a dead fish.

"Master…" Sitting on the edge of the bed, she rested a hand on my arm. "Everything is fine. If you really want me to leave, I will, but… I hope you'll let me make it up to you. Anything you want; name it. As long as it's not… that, it's on the house."

My eyes widened. Now she felt guilty enough to offer me a free lap pillow or tucking-in? That wasn't right. This whole situation was my fault. I owed her, not the other way around.

"Here," I said, handing her a ¥5000 note. Cup ramen for a week was in my future. "W-we can say you did help me. With, um… 'Health Massage'? That's what that means, isn't it?"

"Oh. Well, yes, but I didn't really do-"

"It's fine. Um… and you can keep the other ¥5000 for the other hour. I'm just going to take a bath and… and forget I did something this stupid. But there's no reason you should lose time and money because of me."

"You're sending me away?"

"Yes. A-and now you can use the other hour to do another job for someone who… deserves you. Who isn't useless."

For a long moment, she simply sat there, staring at me. She was going to start reassuring me, or petting over my body, or trying to come up with something else she could do to make me feel better. And I couldn't take it. This was all my fault, and she was being wonderful. Maybe that was her job, but it didn't mean her intentions weren't genuine.

Except what she said was, "Wait. I know that voice."

"N-no, you don't," I said, back to being unnecessarily gruff. Damn. At some point, I had forgotten to pitch my voice low enough to disguise it.

"Yes, I do." And I was powerless to stop her as she reached down and pulled at the mustache until the adhesive gave out and it left my identity a lot less obscured.

"Um…"

"Niijima-san."

"I can explain," I began nervously, sitting up and facing her fully. Even though I really didn't want to. "This wasn't-"

"Still following me, huh?" The anger was slowly bleeding through, and I averted my eyes. "You have a lot of nerve. Do you have any idea what you've done?"

"Yes. I do." My throat worked for a moment before I started blurting out, "I'm ruining your life. I wanted to help, but now I know too much, and… and your life is already hard enough without me complicating everything."

That seemed to undercut her anger a little. "Well… yeah. That's pretty close to what I was thinking, to be honest."

"You can go. I will never tell anyone about this. That's a promise."

"How can I trust you?" she asked weakly, shrugging as she stared down at the bedspread. "You already said you would stop prying into my life. And here you are."

"I tried! But…" Might as well clear the air. "I was behind you."

"Behind me?"

"When you left school today, a-and took that phone call. For your client. I didn't mean to be there - I mean it this time. It really was an accident." Her cheeks flushed a little, and I rushed ahead, "But I already know why you do it. I know it's not just for 'fun', it's because of those people, asking for more money. That you don't have a choice. S-so I know you don't care what I think, but I'm not looking down on you, o-or… or judging you for any of this."

Kawakami mulled that over for a few seconds. "But you pity me."

"Of course. Someone is hurting you."

"They aren't. I hurt myself." Sighing, she turned to sit down more properly. "Takase-san was counting on me to tutor him; he really wanted to learn. But I let others convince me that it was doing more harm than good, and told him I couldn't tutor him anymore. That was why…"

"That was why?"

"That was why he got into that accident. He was distracted by what I had told him, upset about that, and got ran over. And now he's gone. I ended a student's life because I couldn't pay attention to what he really needed, instead of what I thought he needed. It's my fault."

My lip trembled for a second before I whispered, "You… have no reason to listen to me. But unless you were driving the car that hit him, I'm pretty sure it's that guy's fault."

"But… he's gone. Nothing can bring him back, how am I supposed to live with that?"

"How am I supposed to live with the fact that I got so hung up on finding out whether or not my teacher was abusing one of her students that I completely violated her privacy? I don't know. Maybe we just have to do it. Figure it out as we go."

"Abusing?" After a second or two, she closed her eyes and nodded. "Amamiya-kun. You thought we were sleeping together."

"I'm still not totally sure you weren't, but… now I know it was never any of my business. And I'm sorry."

"You really thought I was capable of touching a student that way?" Suddenly, she was staring right at me, the color draining from her face. It took me a moment or two to figure out why.

"Listen-"

"I can't believe I did that. Put my hand right up there and-"

"You had no idea it was me," I reassured her. "If anything, it's my fault for not revealing myself earlier. I tricked you, and it's all on me. I refuse to let you take any of the blame."

Her hand pushed into the side of her face as a shiver of disgust ran the length of her spine. Whether that disgust was at me or at herself, I couldn't be sure. "My own student. I should have been more careful, I… how stupid can I get? That mustache is obviously fake, and your hair is obviously under that hat."

Finally, I took the fedora off. It served no purpose now. "Pretty lame, huh?"

"Why did you do it?" The hand fell away, and I could see her eyes were glistening with unshed tears, but she was trying to focus on the moment instead. "Why didn't you just confront me in class, in front of everyone? I just don't understand why you set up this… this sting operation, or whatever it is. Is the potato hiding in the closet?"

"You should probably stop calling the principal that," I laughed quietly, and she did crack a half smile. "But… you were so angry and hurt when I accused you of having an affair. This time, I couldn't make any assumptions. I had to find out for sure one way or the other."

"Guess I can understand." She stuck her legs out in front of herself, staring down at her uniform. "Look at me. What a mess! Maybe I'm fooling myself. I was never cut out to be a teacher. Outsmarted by the student council president, caught being a Delivery Health maid by two students now…"

After biting my lip for a moment, I reached over and picked up her laminated card. "Well, going by this, I would say you're more maid than Delivery Health. It says right here the only two of those services you offer, you might even refuse."

"God!" she burst out in exasperation, snatching the card away and stuffing it into her pocket. "I'm sorry I ever handed you that! You have no idea the hands that thing has touched!"

"Oh? Um, is it really that unsanitary?"

"I disinfect it before every shift. So not really. But the idea of it…"

Fighting down a creepy crawly feeling that was trying to make its way up my arms, I reached out to lay a hand on her forearm. "I'm sorry. About all of this, about tricking you, following you… it's all my fault and I will apologize every day for the rest of my life."

Kawakami shook her head. "That's not necessary. I deserve this for having both of these jobs at the same time. They really don't go together, do they?"

"Not really. But I am sorry, anyway."

"Well… I forgive you. You did the wrong thing for the right reason; trying to protect Ren. I'm no better than you, I guess."

"Huh? Oh… I didn't come to the Rabuho for him. Even though I'm still not sure how close you are to each other, I know now that I was wrong about you hurting him like that."

Now her eyebrows hiked, and again I was struck by how different she looked with all that makeup, the wig. "Huh? Then, uh… why are we here?"

"Because I wanted to see what this job of yours was. I'd already seen you in the maid outfit, and I was worried… this is stupid."

"No, no, go on."

"Fine. I was worried you were a prostitute, and… those people were making you use your body like that just to pay them off. And it wouldn't matter why; that would be wrong. So even though… this is… not ideal, I guess I'm glad the job isn't as bad as it could be."

She pushed both hands into her face. "I'm so embarrassed. You'll never be able to look me in the eye again, will you?"

"Why wouldn't I?"

"Because I'm an old slut."

"Hey! Don't say that. Come on, I know you, Miss Kawakami, and… and I don't believe you really do that very often. Do you?"

Lowering her hands, eyes empty and dead, she said, "More than I want to admit. But… I normally do refuse the Health Kiss, unless I feel really comfortable with the client. Even then, it depends on the day, and my mood. It's been a while since I did that."

So she did touch them. Just not with her mouth. My stomach curdled but I tried to ignore the reaction - to focus on my teacher. No… this woman in front of me, whose life was troubled because of something she had little control over.

"You have nothing to be ashamed of," I whispered as I moved closer, resting my hand on her back. Her eyebrows raised, and she looked over at me.

"What are you doing?"

"Oh… s-sorry." I took the hand away. "I don't know, I was trying to help."

"No, no, it's alright. You're fine, Niijima-san." Pinching the bridge of her nose now, she added, "I poked your nose with my toes - oh wow, I made you take off my tights! You probably hated doing that, didn't you? Why was I so stupid, why did I assume you wanted that?!"

My laugh was a little bitter. "Why was I so weird that I let you believe I wanted it? That's the question. But… it wasn't that bad. Really, I mean it."

"Having my foot in your face?" I shook my head. "Huh. Maybe you're a weird kid and I'm a weird adult."

"Or maybe we're both weird adults. Come on, I am eighteen; I could even get married if my sister gave her permission. I could even play pachinko, or vote for the Diet… and I can do other things."

The blush was back. I was making my teacher blush, and the crazy thing was, that wasn't my goal at all. Why did I keep making this situation worse simply by trying to reassure her?

"Do you need to see the card again? Because… I know we know who each other is now, but I'm on the clock. If you wanted something-"

"No, no," I chuckled nervously, playing with the hem of my sportcoat. "You shouldn't finish that thought. And you said you could refuse any requests if you don't want to do them, so… I wouldn't even try with those two, anyway.."

Cheeks getting redder, even through the makeup, she whispered, "I was going to say maybe I could massage you, I… seriously, if you asked for me to… do that, with my hand… I can't. You're my student."

My eyes went wide. "If I asked for a massage, you still would? Really?" Her expression was mortified, but she did nod. "Oh."

"Sorry. You're freaked out, maybe I should go to the bathroom and get out of your hair for a minute." Then she straightened up. "Oh! Or you could!"

"What?"

"The bath is still ready! And there are bubbles, and scented oils…" She smiled cautiously. "You should take a bath, let yourself relax. Give yourself some time to think without me being in the way."

"Ohhhhh. I get it now. But what if…" I bit my lips for a moment, then forced myself to finish - even with her staring at me, curious. "What if I wanted you to help me with my bath?"

To Be Continued…

#Queen Of Temperance #persona 5 fanfiction #p5 fanfic #niijima makoto #kawakami sadayo #forkanna writes #jess the writer

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otome-miss · 6 years

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Family Ties (Part 1/5)

Title: Family Ties (Part 1/5) Author: @otome-miss Fandom: Mystic Messenger Characters: Saeran Choi, MC/Reader, Saeyoung Choi (mentioned) Ship: SaeranXMC (unrequited) SaeyoungXMc (secondary) Genre: Angst/Family Life Warnings/Rating: PG13 Mentions of Abuse, Abandonment, Mental Illness, Drugging (all mentioned in retrospect) Word Count: 1,307 Summary: Saeran is attempting to deal with unrequited feelings for you after your marriage to Saeyoung. You are carrying around a secret that needs to be revealed.

Note: This is set after 707′s secret ending. Its also an ongoing series. I’ll add links as the parts come out. Aiming for one chapter a week.

Part 2

AO3 Link

He had worked so hard to get himself straightened out. After everything he'd been through- his childhood, Saeyoung 's disappearance, Rika's abuse, the drugs he'd been fed by her under the guise of 'salvation,' Saeyoung's reappearance, the hospital stays, the hours of therapy, and eventually even some medication that FUCKING DID WHAT IT WAS SUPPOSED TO DO. Saeran felt like he was finally starting to experience some of that life Saeyoung had promised him was possible.

He so badly wanted you to be part of these new possibilities and, in a sense you were, but not as he had hoped. You were his brother's wife now. His sister-in-law for a year and still every time he rounded the corner to the kitchen and found you standing there with a cup of coffee in hand his heart felt like it would explode in his chest. You were the brightest, gentlest person he'd ever known and you were family now. His family-even though he knew his feelings weren't really of a familial nature. Before, he wouldn't have cared that his brother was in love with you. If he wanted you- you could damn well bet- he would've done everything in his power to have you. However, now when things had become so stable and so foreign and…good. He couldn't bring himself to act on these feelings. Anytime he even thought of you in a way he shouldn't Saeyoung's tear stained face screaming at him to come home again appeared in his minds eye. Your smiling face as you'd visited him during his recovery with such pure intentions would haunt the edges of the thoughts he shouldn't have about you. He couldn't destroy this. This home. His home. Your home.

He had two emotional outlets for these feelings. The first: he was fiercely protective of you, going even farther than your own husband at times. Which meant any insignificant fight between you and Saeyoung and he was on your side, much to Saeyoung's annoyance. Even when debating things like a takeout menu, Saeran's answer always seemed to match up to yours. He knew Saeyoung had caught onto that by now but, he hoped it just got interpreted as him trying to piss his older twin off, rather than being indicative of deeper feelings. The second outlet was something much more immature and he was aware of it but, he still couldn't seem to control it. He was a surly and had a bad attitude towards you at times, especially when the unrequited feelings were really stinging him. You never seemed to take it to heart though. He wished you would because then it would've been easier to keep up that act. As it stood, this method was becoming less and less affective for dealing with these things.

When he awoke one morning to the sound of you vomiting in the bathroom inside the bedroom you and Saeyoung shared- he dove out of his bedroom, scrambling down the hall- just barely managing to drag his sweatpants on before reaching the bedroom door. Saeyoung wouldn't be home until tonight because of a business trip. He cursed his brother half heartedly. Saeyoung should be the one coming to aid you, not him. "MC…" He started, hovering outside the locked bathroom door. A gurgle and more retching were his only reply. "MC!? Its Saeran…" Of course it is you idiot. What a useless thing to say. "C-can I help?" What the hell could he do? What did you do for someone puking their guts out so violently? Especially someone as gentle and, in his eyes, fragile as you were. What if something was seriously wrong? What if you couldn't reply? This was going to give him a heart attack. When you still hadn't answered Saeran banged his fist on the door. "MC? I'm coming in." Still his hand hesitated over the handle of the door. What if you weren't…clothed or in one of those silky little nightgowns? Dear god the last thing he wanted to do was be having those thoughts when you might seriously need him. A whimper from the other side of the door silenced all thoughts and Saeran slammed himself unnecessarily hard through the door.

He found you curled up in a fetal position forehead pressed to the cool tile floor (clothed, thank god), sick still lingering in the toilet bowl. "S-Saeran…I'm okay…" You managed to croak out. “I just got so nauseated all of a sudden after waking up." Your eyes were squeezed close and he picked his way closer to you, hands clenching and unclenching. He was not good at this sort of thing. "Fuck. MC…you look terrible….I mean…" He panicked knowing how harsh he could sound. You cracked open one eye and gave him an exasperated look. "It's fine. But since I look so horrible can you try helping me up?"

Finally something he could do without words fucking up his intentions. He came closer trying not to notice that you were dressed only in one of Saeyoungs shirts with a pair of his pajama pants on. You must be missing him. That knowledge caused his chest to pulse with a twisting jealous pain. The red head ignored it and wrapped his arms firmly under yours, hoisting you up slowly. You felt so soft against him it was driving him insane. You managed to get your legs under you and he helped you to the edge of the bed. He returned to the bathroom and flushed. Then he grabbed the cup you kept for water off the bathroom sink and fumbled with the tap until it ran cold. He carried you back the cup and held it out to you. "D-do you think you've got the flu or something?" You shook your head and he could feel his anxiety rising. How could you know? You were just puking your guts out in there. "W-well you can't know that for sure! You were just. We need to get you to a doctor right now. I'll drive so just-" He was getting flustered, fingers dragging through his tangled mess of hair. The only skills he had at taking care of someone sick had come from the countless times you and Saeyoung had cared for him. Whether he was sick from anxiety attacks, flashbacks, or something physical the pair of you always found the right way.

He felt a gentle hand on his arm making his building frustration halt. His cool gaze swung to yours- confused. "Saeran calm down. I already know what's going on with me. It's normal. Not fun but, normal. I didn't want to say anything until Saeyoung got home tonight but I know you're worried. I'm just…not sure how well this is going to go over with your brother…or maybe even you…" You worried your bottom lip between your teeth. Saeran hated the feeling building in the pit of his stomach. All the things his mind were conjuring in response to your words were a thousand possibilities-none of them ending well for you. "Just spit it out already. I can always lock myself in my room until Saeyoung gets home if you're that worried for your own safety…" Despite himself venom had managed to creep its way into his words. There was a bitterness to remembering you might be afraid of him endangering you. Did you still see him as he was two years ago? Dangerous and willing to strike at the slightest bit of conflict or discomfort?

"Saeran." Your voice was so firm it surprised him. "I am not afraid of you. I am afraid of hurting you because…what I say is going to change things. Not everything…but things have been so good for you and Saeyoung." He looked at you, too confused for horror. "I'm…pregnant."

#Saeran X Reader #saeran x mc #Saeran Choi #Saeran fic #Mystic Messenger fic #Mysme fic #Mystic Messenger #Saeyoung X Reader #Saeyoung Choi #Mysme #my fics

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shadowfics · 7 years

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"I'm gonna kill him" -- Pt 2

After I confided in Jace he would not leave me alone. “I’m gonna go take a shower”. I wiped my eyes with the sleeve of my jumper and placed my weapons back on the rack. “C-can I use your shower, erm mines broken”. He stuttered, obviously trying to find an excuse so I didn’t have to go into that room by myself. I smiled at him showing my appreciation, “He’s in Idris until the end of the week don’t worry”. I heard the training room door open, I turned to see who it was and I immediately wish I hadn’t. It was Alec. He saw me and hesitated to come in. I looked away, tears starting to rise. “Hey Jace”, I never realised how much I missed his voice. I hadn’t spoken to him for just over a week but it honestly felt like a lifetime. Jace stuttered with his reply, obviously feeling like he was in the middle, “H-hey Alec”. “What are you doing tonight? Magnus has invited me, you, Izzy, Simon and Clary to one of his parties”. He raised his voice wanting me to hear him, wanting me to know that he still hadn’t forgiven me. I mean I couldn’t blame him. Jace huffed, “Alec…don’t blame Y/N-“. I knew he was going to tell him and Alec was the last person I wanted to know about this. I spun round to face them from the weapons rack, “JACE”, I shouted, subtly shaking my head before Alec could turn to face me. Jace saw the desperation in my eyes from across the room., “Go”. I told him, not wanting to look at Alec, “Have a nice time”. I walked out of the room with the fake smile still plastered onto my face.

I had been sat staring at the same spot for hours in my room, hair still dripping from the shower. There was a knock on the door, I flinched, “Who is it?”. I asked wearily. “It’s Izzy”. I opened the door to her and she skipped in wearing a very short sparkly dress. “Why aren’t you ready yet! We are leaving in 5 minutes!”, She frowned. I was confused for a second when I finally realised she was talking about Magnus’ party. “I’m not invited”, I said quietly, slumping back down on my bed. Izzy looked confused, “What are you talking about? I was there when Magnus invited us, you were the first name he said actually”. “Alec said…it doesn’t matter anyway, he doesn’t want me there, he’s not ready yet…and who can blame him. I don’t want to make things worse Iz”. She sat next to me on my bed and put my hand in hers. “None of this is your fault, you were forced into this, you need to stop blaming yourself”. There was a short silence in the room where I processed what she said and took it on board. This wasn’t my fault, I was forced into this, I didn’t ask for any of this and I certainly didn’t want any of this. “Now you can sit here feeling sorry for yourself or you can come out and have an amazing night with me. Forget about Alec, if he can’t understand then thats his loss. Anyway, you’ll always have the best Lightwood by your side”. She said with a wink and a smile. I pulled her into a tight hug, I was truly blessed to have heron my life, she was more to me than just my parabati.

I was finally ready. Izzy had told the others to go on without her, she didn’t want to tell them I was coming because she knew Alec would back out and then all the others would and she didn’t want that. She kept Clary behind as she knew that I would want her there as well whilst Simon drove Alec and Jace to the party as they were already late. I couldn’t wear anything revealing or anything that showed skin, only Jace knew about my bruises and I didn’t want anyone else knowing, it was my burden to bear not anyone else. I walked out in a long sleeve black top and my well worn go to black jeans with my black and white converse. I literally looked like I was just going on a mission. I grabbed my key for my room and took my phone off charge. I looked up at the two awaiting faces that were sat on my bed, “Lets go”. My face was showing one emotion: happiness. But on the inside I was feeling the complete opposite: nervous, dread, anger, regret, worry, guilt and most of all scared. I didn’t know what was going to happen tonight, with Alec and just in general. I didn’t know what was going to happen to me anymore. But no one ever noticed, I never let them see, I was a professional at hiding it all especially now.

We walked up to the entrance of Magnus’ apartment, I went to open the door, as a knock would not be heard from the volume of the music playing, but I hesitated. Izzy and Clary came to my side, “You aren’t going though this alone, you’ll be with us, don’t worry”. And with their reassuring smiles I pulled on the door handle and entered. My eyes immediately fell on Alec and Jace standing near the bar but they hadn’t noticed that we were there.

Throughout the night I just mingled. Clary had gone with Jace and Izzy had gone to Simon, I wanted them to have a good time, not just babysitting me and following me around. “Hey Y/N, congrats on your wedding! We heard about it but we haven’t seen you in the institute in days, but you are probably having your alone time with you new hubby”. I had never seen her before but obviously the news had be travelling round, I felt sick to my stomach with what everyone was saying. It was the 500th conversation I had had about the marriage in the last hour alone, I just smiled and tried to find a corner to go sit in but she clung onto my arm, “Your hubster is in the other room if you are looking for him”. My eyes went wide and panic took over my body completely. “W-what do you mean? He’s in Idris!”. I stuttered but the music was too loud for her to hear me so she just turned back to her friends and continued dancing. The whole room started to feel like it was swinging left to right, I looked around frantically. I wanted to find someone. Jace, Izzy, Simon…just anyone. I saw Magnus and Dot out on the balcony, I started to go towards them when I was grabbed and shoved into the nearest room. From the force of the push I fell onto the floor of what I assumed was Magnus’ room because of the glittery curtains and sparkly duvet. This action was all too familiar, it was him. I looked up as he was closing and locking the door. “Are you telling people things about me?!”, he screamed. “No”, I couldn’t even look him in the eye, I was terrified. I wanted someone to hear him but it was impossible, the music was way too loud for anyone to hear anything. “Then do tell me why Jace Herondale has asked the clave for a meeting concerning me, and please do explain why he has asked for my private and personal files to be transferred from my old institute to New York’s!”. I wasn’t annoyed at Jace, I knew he was doing this all for me and he wanted to protect me, I just wish he had warned me about it and gave me a heads up on what he was doing. I could have prepared myself for the consequences. “Why don’t you go and ask him and leave me alone!”, I hissed back. I had mixed emotions, I wanted to show that I wasn’t afraid even though I was terrified and that I wasn’t affected by what he was doing even though I was broken. Completely broken. “You’re a liar. Do you know what happens to liars”. He pulled out a well lit seraph blade dagger, “They get punished”. I went to run towards the door but my face collided with his fist instead. I was out cold.

••••

“Have you seen Y/N?”, Izzy carefully but quickly ran up to Clary, Jace and Alec in her heels with Simon following her. Alec rolled his eyes but Izzy just dismissed it, she knew he was being childish. Both Clary and Jace shook their heads. “Y/N’s probably hooking up with William, he wasn’t even invited why the hell would Y/N bring him”. Alec said with a hint of jealousy. Jace choked on his drink, his eyes were wide and he started to look worried. “WHAT! William is here!? He’s meant to be in Idris”. Everyone looked confused on why Jace was so bothered. “Y/N didn’t want me to say anything, I only found out this morning and (s)he didn’t want me to say anything to anyone. I wanted to kill him-“. Alec cut him off, “JACE! Get on with it!”. “William is abusive. I was in the training room and you should have seen all the bruises and cuts. They were serious and some were deep, he’s very dangerous”. Alec was guilty and furious, “Why the hell didn’t you say anything to us, Y/N’s life could be in danger!”. Jace looked at the floor disappointedly, “He was meant to be in Idris for the week, I was setting up meetings with the Clave to see if I could get him transferred to another institute whilst he was away so Y/N didn’t have to face him and get hurt by that monster ever again. He wasn’t meant to be back”. Alec was about to respond when Izzy yelled out in pain. Simon ran to her side, “Babe what’s up?!”. She clung on to her arm and gritted her teeth, “It’s Y/N, something’s wrong”. Alec’s voice was shaky and filled with dread, “What are we waiting for!!”.

The group frantically searched and asked Magnus to clear the guests out ASAP and within 5 minutes the apartment was just filled with scattered empty red cups and pizza crusts. Magnus went to slide his bedroom door open to find that it was locked, he frantically twisted his hands around with blue waves coming from them but his magic didn’t budge the door. “THEY’RE IN HERE”, he shouted for everyone to come to him. Jace bashed on the door, “Y’N, YOU IN THERE!”. But there was no answer. “You won’t hear anything, the bedroom walls are soundproof”, Magnus admitted, if it wasn’t such a bad situation there would be a few chuckles and wide eyes from everyone. “Magnus why can’t you open the door?!”, Clary asked whilst helping Jace pull on the handle. “It’s been locked from the inside by a rune, my magic isn’t useful against that”. Izzy was still in pain, a lot of pain which was only half of what Y/N was going through. Simon stood by her, keeping her up right, feeling useless. Clary grabbed her stele, “Jace, Alec get back…NOW!”. She had only just discovered that she had new powers that created runes, more powerful than any others. She thought for a moment and closed her eyes and then once she got the picture her arm didn’t stop. Waves, circles and all kinds of shapes and the door came flying open.

••••

He was on top of me, his knees pinning one arm down whilst he did something with the other. It hadn’t been long since I regained consciousness and I really wish I hadn’t. The pain was incredible and there was no sign of it stopping. I was screaming out and crying, hoping that someone would find me but I knew that was unlikely. My hearing started to go and I was drifting in and out of consciousness, my eye sight was going blurry which I assumed was because of the excruciating pain, my body couldn’t take it anymore. Suddenly there was a massive bang and the sliding door nearly flew off the hinges. He got off me and that’s when I realised how much pressure was on top of my chest that I hadn’t felt. The first person I saw was Alec and the minute I did I felt so much better, that was until the punches were thrown. Izzy came running to my side, trying to talk to me but it was just a bunch of noise, I couldn’t hear anything properly which scared me. She looked down at my arm, the source of most of the pain, and her face dropped. I looked down and that’s when I saw it. That’s when I saw what he had done to me. Then everything went black.

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ravishmeclownboi-blog · 6 years

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(/^♡^)/ first off you're amazing!!! Second, I'm feeling fluffy and want some pennyfluff where he saves the reader from an abusive bf (he can eat the bf ;) and is super nice while he cradles reader and kisses them telling what a good girl they are as he takes off their clothes and continues kissing them all over while comforting them. Ps. I love you ❤🎈❤ *scurries and hides*

Okay here goes i hope you like it😄

Rain fell down outside, you sat in your living room gazing out the window contemplating life in its simplest forms, wondering why we exist, what your purpose was, wondering why you ever got into this situation in the first place. Surely you were smarter than this? Surely you were. All your life family, friends, and acquaintances had told you that you deserved to be happy, free and with someone who adored and cherished you, and the funny thing is, for a while that all seemed to come true. You had met him in college and you instantly hit it off when he helped you study for a big final. You bonded over music, movies, you had the same sense of humor and ways of doing things. It seemed like you were almost made for each other, he was yours and you were his. You were soul mates and everything was beautiful for 3 years, everything was perfect, that was until you felt his hand strike your face. Of course, he promised he’d never do it again, begging you to take him back, which foolishly you did. Then the blow of his fist came, powerful hands grabbing your hair and dragging you across your apartment floor, kicking and screaming whilst he would shout out obscenities at you, ‘dumb cunt’ was his favourite, it was used so often that it pretty much became your nickname and you just learned to withstand it. You had learned to withstand the beatings too. You had learned to live with the slaps, the mental torture of wondering when the next showdown was to come, you had gotten used to the sharp pain of the cuts, the aching of the bruises and you were an expert in coming up with excuses to when friends asked you what had happened to your face and your arms, they probably already knew what really went on at this point, but you were too mentally tired to care what they thought.

You were happy and serene in these little hours of the day, the two or three hours between when you arrived home from work and you were awaiting your spouse to return, even though part of you hated him for what he put you through, you still loved him and you still got up to greet them when they came through the door, hugging and giving them a kiss like you were the perfect couple. But something always went wrong, the little things set them off if you hadn’t sorted out dinner, if there was laundry to be done or if you borrowed his laptop to check emails or do some work from home. You were always on your toes around him and you were afraid, but you never left. A part of you thought as the years went on, maybe if you’d settled down, got married and had a child maybe his personality and behavior would calm down, but you knew deep down you were kidding yourself because people don’t really change. You had been thinking about your time in Derry, where you grew up, and as the rain continued to ricochet off the window pane your mind wandered to those days when you were 15, younger and full of hope and love, all your friends, your family.... and someone else, something else. This thing stroke terror into the hearts of children and other adults but to you, it only filled your body and heart with wonder and majesty. It took a liking to you from the moment it set eyes on you and even though at first you were scared for your life, you found yourself oddly compelled to follow this thing wherever it went, have it beside you, like some kind of fucked up guardian angel. In time you felt safe around this creature, the way he touched you, caressed you and protected you, like the time you were nearly attacked by that asshole Henry Bowers, he came out of the shadows and attacked him, screaming at him to not touch “what was rightfully his” you weren’t an object and you usually hated the thought of a person addressing you like you were one, but he wasn’t human. And he said those things not like a possessive madman but like you were his precious little treasure, his world. When you left Derry you thought you’d never see him again, and truthfully it hurt. Even when you were in your honeymoon phase of your soon to be a destructive relationship you still thought of him.

His face appeared in your dreams, whenever you closed your eyes he was all you could see, you wanted to feel his arms around you just once more, but I guess all good things must come to an end at some point, so you can move on to better, but what you had moved on to wasn’t, it was hell. Your thoughts and daydream suddenly were shattered as you heard the slam of the front door, you jolted up from your armchair to make yourself presentable and seemingly happy to greet your lover. “Hey babe, how was work?” You chirped out with a smile. Running over to give him a hug and a peck on the cheek. “Fucking bullshit, that’s what it was, I need a drink” your smile turned into a frown, he was in a bad mood and he’d not even been home for 2 minutes. “Sorry to hear that, how about we go out and have coffee instead, we could go for a walk and come home and watch something on Netflix, that’ll cheer you up” you said hopefully with a innocence and hope in your voice. “Have you seen the weather outside? and I don’t have time, gotta get paperwork done or I’m screwed, can you get me a glass of wine” you backed away and continued speaking, trying to sway him from the anger and stress he was feeling. “Come on you don’t need to drink, just come with me and we’ll have fu-“ he interrupted you with a mighty bellow of anger infused words. “ARE YOU STUPID? Did you not hear what I just said, stop being a fucking nuisance and get me the Damn wine” You gasped and took a breath, trying not to let your eyes fill with tears. “No” you timidly and shyly spoke “no I won’t get you a glass of wine because you don’t need it” he suddenly grabbed you by the arm and twisted it, your body became stiff and you yelped out at the sharp stinging pain of his fingers pressed into you. “You do what I fucking say...I told you to never speak back, remember what happens when you speak back you little cunt?” Tears started to form as his grip became tighter and more menacing. “Let go off me!” You screamed in his face “you’re hurting me” he laughed mockingly in your face, spit hitting your cheeks and making you feel completely inferior. “I don’t give a fuck, you deserve this, you’re always fucking going on at me, always wanting more more more! “Oh do this with me y/n “why are you always working y/n” why can’t you ever just shut up?” And with those sharp intakes of his words you felt it, the feeling you’ve felt a thousand times before, his cracked, dry hand slap you across your face, this one was painful and it made you fall to the ground in agony. You lay there like a shriveled up doll, covering your face with your hands and begging him not to continue. As he crawled upon the floor, towering over your body and screaming all the names under the sun at you, his face red with anger and hatred, but there was a look in his eyes, a hungry and sinister look, that look.

You knew what he was thinking and you didn’t want to know what was going on inside his head, all the details. wickedness filled his face as he spoke, still angry but a forced calmness fell upon him. “You know, it doesn’t have to be like this y/n, I’m just really stressed and you make it worse, help me get a load off and we’ll call it a night hm?” Your eyes widened with fright, your lips trembled as you tried to scurry away under him, but it was to no avail. His hands began tearing at your sweater, pulling it up forcefully, hands groping onto your chest, his free hand was down below his belt as he unbuckled it and began forcefully pulling your jeans down. “NO Y/N STOP, STOP PLEAASE” you cried out “LET GO OF ME” you bit his hand trying to make him get off you but that only made the fury come out in full force with yet another slap to your tear-stained face. “You shouldn’t have done that you fucking stupid cunt” he sneered. He was about to do something much worse and you thought you might as well lie there and take it because it was useless trying to fight him. But just as you were beginning to come to terms with your fate you saw two humongous white-gloved hands appear over his shoulders and grab him, shoving him backwards into the wall. He was back. He stood there looking at your frail and shaking body, angered at what your spouse did to you. He remembered how full of life and innocent you were back in Derry and him seeing you like a frightened mouse made him furious, he liked your free spirit and even though he was a monster that fed on fear, something inside of him adored you being happy. “P-Pennywise” you gasped. “You’re back” you smiled out, still crying but the tears and sadness turned into an overwhelming veil of relief and excitement. You felt a rush come over you. “Of course I’m back little one, what has this pathetic human boy done to you?” He came over to you, putting his hand gently on your face and stroking your cheek, you closed your eyes and tingles went all through your body as you felt his beautiful warm touch, for the first time in so long, and it felt wonderful. A grumble filled the room, your spouse had awoken from his brief unconscious state after being shoved into the concrete wall. “What the fuck are you? What the fuck are you doing freak?” He screamed at the clown. Pennywise conked his head round to face the defeated man looking at him with pure hatred and resentment. “I’m going to show you real pain, I’m your worst nightmare, stupid man, how dare you lay your scum filled, meek human hands on her” He sneered.

His mouth widened, revealing his magnificent, frightening and razor-sharp jaws as he ran towards him and pinned him against the wall, his gloved hand, now with protruding black claws. “You never deserved her human, you never deserved to have her touch, her face, her body SHES MINE, and now it’s time to die” He stuck his fully clawed hand through his abdomen, blood splatting out over the white walls, he coughed and gagged on his own blood as he became nothing but a lifeless sack of meat between the clowns body. He fell to the floor like a rag doll. You sat there shocked, in a state of pure dismay. The man that you loved, the man that hurt you, made you feel inadequate, defeated, scared and worthless was now dead. And all though you thought you’d feel sadness and horror seeing the scene that had just unravelled before your eyes, you felt nothing. All you cared about was that Pennywise was back, he was back for you, he saved you, like a prince saving the maiden from a dragon. Pennywise turned his attention now to you again, he got on all fours and crawled to your shaking body that was sitting up on the floor, head down and trying not to cry. He held his hand, now back to the soft human-like hand to your face, he used his forefinger to touch your chin and tilt it up so you were looking at him, in his beautiful icy blue eyes, the same eyes you dreamed about every night. “He’s gone now, my sweet” without hesitation you threw your body into his, nose and mouth inhaling his scent, popcorn and bubblegum. Sniffling into his ruffled collar you felt safe again, as his arms tightly wrapped around you, in a beautiful gentle embrace. “I missed you so much” you quietly cried out into him. He stroked your hair and breathed into your neck as he was smelling you too, he hadn’t been this close to you in years, even though he’d never say it out loud because pride wouldn’t let him, he missed you terribly and he was absolutely over the moon to have his little doll back in his arms once again, like you’d never left.

“It’s okay little one, I’m back. And I’m never leaving again”

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sonderabcomm3e · 3 years

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“I Am You”

Statistics display the rate of dissociative identity disorder as .01% to 1% of the overall populace. Some of them say that they experience it as if they are watching themselves in a movie at times. Will you believe if I tell you that I'm part of that small percentage of people with undiagnosed dissociative identity disorder? Or you'll think that I'm just a typical weirdo in the neighborhood just like what others think? But I'll tell you they are true, and they exist in me. My name is Terry. I'm a scarred highschool student. Kids at my age used to make fun of me because I stutter every time I speak. Is it a bad thing? I can't understand them though. I didn't do anything wrong for them to hate me this much. Today, someone threw my bag into the trash bin when I was away from my seat to buy some snacks in the canteen. That made Sam furious. Sam is my other self. He is a 20 years old teenager with an anger management issue. Weeks ago I was sent to the Guidance Office because he beat someone for accidentally stepping on his foot. That time my classmates were so flustered because I used to be the one who received that kind of treatment from my bullies. At this moment, Sam is taking the spot over me, so he can avenge on my behalf. Honestly, I'm glad that he exists because without him, I'm just a wimpy kid who cannot fight back. I'm so sick of that. But before he punched that guy straight on his face I stopped Sam. Yes, we can coexist at the same time. Amazing, right? I saw how scared that idiot is when I started talking to Sam. I know he thinks I'm crazy, but I have no other choice. I don't want Sam to get into trouble. I know him, he turns into a monster when he's angry, so I decided to cut my class and went home straight before Sam's emotion exploded. There, Loida suddenly appears. She is my third identity. Loida is a full-time housewife, and she always takes good care of me and Sam. You know, I used to be alone in this house. I have no one by my side because my parents passed away in a car accident when I was thirteen. I was lonely but not until my two identities came. I still remember it vividly, when I'm alone walking in a dark alley after a tiring day at school, I heard an unusual noise. Out of my curiosity I tried to find where is that noise coming from, as I come closer and closer to it, the noise becomes more loud and clear. It was a girl desperately crying for help, and around her is a bunch of male students feasting on her body. I was too scared, I was too coward. I ran and left that girl behind, then the next day, I saw her face in a news article. She's dead, she committed suicide that night, after that horrible incident. That's when my other two identities came to life. In the middle of a calm and sunny day a strong wind blows into my life, yet I wasn't so sure if this will give me comfort or will leave me more devastated at the end. But now I'm sure that it's not the latter. I enjoyed their company. Actually no one wants to be my friend, good thing I have the both of them, so I'm feeling less lonely these days. I'm just afraid of one thing. I haven't seen my fourth identity. I just heard things about him from Sam and Loida. According to them, he exists to protect young girls, but he's quite dangerous because he has a tendency to kill. My life is already complicated as it is, I don't think I need more. Bang! I heard the sound of a gun near my place, so I rushed outside to check where the noise was coming from. I saw a man probably in his 30s pointing a gun to a half naked girl trembling in fear. The next thing I knew is that my hands are covered in blood while holding a gun, and in front of me is a lifeless man and a girl crying out of shock. Minutes later I'm still staring blankly out of nowhere when the cops came and arrested me. “It was not me”, I uttered between my tears. But will they actually believe me or they'll just think that I'm crazy? Well, it doesn't matter anymore. Everything is all messed up, but none of these is my fault. If only the world became less cruel to me, I think everything would have

flowed differently. None of these would happen, and no one needs to suffer. “Shall we put an end to this?”, I whispered to the cop next to me in the passenger's seat. I quickly grab his gun and pull the trigger, then jump out of the car. Why would I kill myself if I can just kill them all? Afterall, it is the world who turns me into who I am. Run, run, run, all my life all I do is to run like a coward, but not anymore. From this day forward, I will deliver every sinner to hell. That's how my fourth identity dominates me. My other identities are no longer able to take the spot, all I can do is to watch him as if I'm watching myself in a movie. Under the moonlight when everyone was asleep, he goes around every dark alleys slashing his knife to everyone he saw committing inhumane acts: rape, robbery, murder, all of them. He doesn't miss any. I can feel how satisfied he is while mutilating the bodies of his targets, he even collected some of their belongings as his remembrance. Each day passing by, people's fear of going outside in the middle of the night increases after seeing those mortified bodies purposely left in the street to serve as a warning. The busy street in the morning looks like an abandoned place every night. Though the criminality rate reaches the bottom rock, yet no one dares to go outside. “Is this the world that you want?”, I asked myself hoping that this will be heard by my fourth personality. At once, he let me take over the spot, now we are coexisting in my body. “Oh, my dear Terry, only evil can defeat evil. A sacrifice should be made to end this war, you should be proud of our contribution to achieve this peace. Why are you being like that? Every man has a darkness buried deeply within them, and you are not an exemption. Come on, don't fool yourself. You're not better than me. Did you not enjoy watching me stab those garbages ruthlessly? Did you not enjoy hearing them scream and plead for their lives? Did you not feel like a god even for a moment just like I am? Don't you know that I exist to do what you are too scared to do? No matter how hard you deny me, I am you.” A sound of a gun cut our conversation, the police surrounded me, and now I am cornered. “Let's just surrender!”, I angrily shouted to my fourth personality, but he never listened to me. Instead he reached the cop nearest to him, stole his gun and took him as a hostage. I don't know what to do, he became stronger than me. In fact, he has more control of my own body than I do. While I am still confused on what to do, one of the officers shoots me in my left arm making me lose my hold on the hostage. When they already ensured the safety of the hostage, they shot my left arm once again which made me lose my balance. I fell hard and became unconscious for a few seconds. When I woke up, my fourth personality was no longer with me. I take the opportunity and grab the gun that I fell a while ago. “I'm sorry but I refuse to be a part of your evil scheme; I refuse to be you.”, I uttered before letting the bullet enter my head. I clearly saw the blood dripping down my head, then everything around me turned black. “This must be the end.”, I whispered as my strength slowly left my body. But I was wrong. When I opened my eyes all I could see was a room covered with white paint, a white bed, and a white dress. I shout and shout hoping that someone will hear me, but no one responded to my desperate cry. That moment I was suddenly reminded of the people who died on my own hands. They actually do the same, they desperately plead for their lives, but at the end it was all useless. I never felt even a small amount of sympathy towards them. All I could think about is their sins — I was too busy justifying all the heinous crimes I committed. Is this the price I have to pay for the blood in my hands?

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