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#Inspirational Good Morning Quotes To Makes Your Sister Smile
raethedreamer · 2 years
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Inspirational Good Morning Quotes To Makes Your Sister Smile
Inspirational Good Morning Sister Quotes – Anxiety over sending a heartfelt top morning greeting to your sister is a imperative section of waking up each day. As a motivating term, the phrase “good morning” is regularly used in greetings to rouse cherished ones out of mattress or to jump start their day with a increase earlier than midday.
Whenever the days seem dark and full of terrors, I turn my head around to you for solutions and you magically have them every time! Good morning dear sister!
School lessons are supplemented when you have a sister who imparts valuable insights on a day to day basis. Good morning sis, may you have a great day ahead!
A million thank yous can never overcome the debt that I have accumulated.
I am fortunate enough to have a sister like you to look forward to every day. Good morning sister, another glorious day awaits you!
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Mairuma Incorrect Quotes #2
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Dark humor again. Woooh.
⚠️ Also this post might contain triggering topics such as smoking, juuling and more. ⚠️
Mairuma Incorrect Quotes #1
Agares: You know if cats slept for an entire day, people will find them adorable and cute. But if I do it "I have mental health issues" and "I need help"? Seems quite unfair.
Kerori: Agares Picero. You slept for three straight days with no eating, skipping three days of school, not even communicating with us. You gave Gaap a heart attack-
Agares: I suddenly lost my ability to hear shit.
Kerori: You bitc-
Mairuma Incorrect Quotes #2
Purson: Okay what happened with Jazz-kun and Lied-kun because I heard screaming beforehand and then when I came into the room they were cuddling and sleeping with eachother.
Iruma: Oh, Jazz-kun found a JUUL in Lied-kun bag and got mad and then Lied-kun called him a hypocrite because he also smok-
Purson : To make a long story short..?
Iruma: They fought and then one of them cried then comforted eachother while joking about their trauma.
Purson: It was wholesome until you added the last detail. Why?-
Mairuma Incorrect Quotes #3
Agares: This cup of coffee represents my love for myself.
Gaap: Agares-dono...it's empty..
Agares: Exactly.
Kerori: Okay, who thought you dark humor? I- Wait ...*turns her head to Lied*
Lied: *sweating while pretending not to hear*
Mairuma Incorrect Quotes #4
Iruma: Hey, Azz-kun do you think I look fat?
Asmodeus: ..Why?
Iruma: I'm sorry I just..
Asmodeus: No, why would people be so stupidly blind to not see your elusive beauty? Damn demon these days..
Iruma: * raises his eyebrows then quickly smiled*
Meanwhile..
Kerori: Imagine saying you're not depressed but your favourite song is "Look who's inside again."
Agares: Is this because I didn't follow your devi-account yet? I'm sorry that I don't like to follow akudols that I don't like.
Kerori: I hate you.
Agares: Glad the feelings mutual.
⭐Kerori and Agares is totally not inspired by my friendship with my friend irl. Nope definitely not.⭐
Mairuma Incorrect Quotes #5
Kalego: Okay you brats,what the fuck do you do when you want to call for emotional support?
Misfit Class: Oh we're fine, how are you?
Kalego: No, just no. I'm literally gonna fucking kill your therapist at this point.
Dantelion who just went to annoy Kalego: ...
UPDATED!
Mairuma Incorrect Quotes #6
Lied: What the devi? Hey, Agares what are you doing in the middle of the nig-
Agares: Do you know that there is over in lover.
Lied: Uh-
Agares: and end in friend.
Lied: UH-
Agares: and good in goodbye.
Lied: Isn't that kind of dark- anyways please go to sleep it's one o' clock in the morning.
Agares: Says your gaming addiction.
Lied: Says your coffee addiction.
Agares: Says-
Purson who can't sleep because of them: OH MY DEVI, WE'RE TRYING TO SLEEP! WE"LL DEAL WITH YOUR DEPRESSING BULLSHIT TOMMOROW. GO TO SLEEP YOU LITTLE SHITS! YOU"RE LUCKY I CARE ABOUT YOU OR ELSE I WOULD'VE BEATEN THE SHIT OUT OF YOU!
Claire's note:
Two hc I have showcase in this incorrect quote.
Uno, the Misfit Class sometimes sleepover at the royal one as a way of bonding.
Dos, Purson is a real bitch when he doesn't get any sleep.
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ENDING
My content is turning into dog-shit ain't it? Yeah, yeah it is. Btw I'm thinking of making a misfit class hamilton play in my fanfic. The demons starring the schuyler sisters.
Lied- Angelica
Iruma- Eliza
Agares- Peggy
Them three because them crossdressing is my literal sanity.
What do you think? My hand tells me no but my brain is telling me yes. I still don't know who should be hamilton though, I'm open to suggestions. Anyways I wish you a good day or night! See ya guys, gals and non-binary pals!
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maplejust · 1 year
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Quotations wallpapers hd
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I like the fact that handwritten typography is used on the chalkboard to bring across the message that create something with your hands is not only fun but enriching too.įull Details & Download Motivational Futuristic Quote This wallpaper has beautiful design with a focus on the word ‘choice’ and ‘change’ to bring across the point.Ī beautiful image with an inspirational message, we open many doors by keeping our mind open.įull Details & Download Make Time to Create We love the pattern created with type, and it comes together to focus on the word ‘dream’ and the power of ideas. Sometimes all you need to do is just that ‘just breathe’ and relax, do your bit and not worry about the outcome. This is one of the powerful quotes with a profound meaning it is one of the most downloaded wallpapers of the list.įull Details & Download Power Lies In ImaginationĪn inspirational quote by ‘J.K Rowling’ is all you need today to feel the magic lies within you, the magic to change the world. This wallpaper has a bold and clean design with a powerful message it is among the most popular wallpapers.įull Details & Download A Smile Is The Best Make-UpĪ beautiful quote from ‘Marlyn Monroe’ for all the girls out there, now you know what to wear always. This is more of a typography design by Matisse Lin, but it is a powerful quote that will inspire you do get up and finish your tasks.
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This is a quote from the movie “The Weather Man”, wise words to stay motivated in life.Ī beautiful quote that reminds us of the reality of life and prepares us to look forward.įull Details & Download Adventure and RoutineĪ thought-provoking quote from the famous author ‘Paulo Coelho’, he inspires to do beyond the routine.Ī minimalistic wallpaper that will inspire you to do your best.įull Details & Download Motivational Quotes Wallpaper for Desktop and SmartphoneĪn inspirational quote by ‘Les Brown’ to aim higher and you’d end up with something.īeautiful lines by “Jimi Hendrix’ that sums up the complexities of love and its power.įull Details & Download Do It Immediately
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We always bring stuff that you would love, we have already shared 24+ Best High Definition Windows 10 Wallpapers for Your Desktop, 30+ beautiful iPhone wallpapers, 16+ Best Tumblr Blogs to download awesome wallpaper images, now we’re sharing with you 31+ best desktop wallpapers with Inspiring quotes. I have sifted through hundreds of wallpapers with inspiring quotes to round up some of the most inspirational and moving wallpapers. Essentially, there are millions of people who spend their time in front of their computer screens.Įveryone needs some form of relaxation and if the wallpapers with inspiring quotes on your desktop are quite appealing to display beautiful photos, stunning images of nature and pictures of different things.įeeling the amazing pleasure of looking into attractive pictures of the wallpapers with inspiring quotes and also feel the inspiration and motivation brought by the quotes that are present in such wallpapers. Today, many people use laptops and computers. Why Choose Wallpapers With Inspiring Quotes
Motivational Quotes Wallpaper for Desktop and Smartphone.
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Here you will see 400+ New Good Morning Images, DP, Pictures, and Photos for the year 2022 in HD Quality that you will not find anywhere else on the internet. And share these good morning wishes with your father, mother, brother, sister, friends, and loved ones. So share the love with everyone and fill their day with happiness. Sending just one morning greeting to someone can make their day better. Morning is the perfect time to tell people how much you love them, and when you wake up, the first thing you miss is them. Send these beautiful Morning wishes images to your loved ones in a beautiful way.Įarly in the morning, when the sun rises slightly in the sky, with light, fresh and cool air blowing all around, it is a good time to prepare yourself for the whole day and inspire others. See morning pictures of flowers, Love, Motivation, nature, wishes, messages, and Good Morning Images with quotes. Here you will see the best good morning images for everyone in different types and unique styles for WhatsApp, Facebook, Instagram, or social media profiles. Are You Looking for the Beautiful Good Morning Images? See the huge collection of high-quality good morning images, photos, pictures, and wallpapers.
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jtr1997 · 2 years
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Best inspirational Good Morning textual content messages for your sister
Sisters are love. Sisters are shut to our hearts and we favor to make them comfortable in each and every second of their life. Then, why no longer we need to begin to shape the early morning of the day by way of downloading Good Morning inspirational quotes for Sister, importing them on your status, or sending them in private chat? This issue can make your loving sister experience special.
You’re so strong and beautiful. Don’t let anything or anyone spoil your day. Have a great day sis. Good morning.
May today be the best day of your existence, with all your expectations met. Profitable deals, favour and increase await you today. Good morning wonderful sister.
Top of the morning to you sis. Have a day as bright as the sun. Nothing can stop you today. I love you.
Welcome to a beautiful day. Don’t forget to smile and have maximum fun. Good morning amazing sister.
I miss you greatly. I miss your voice, your smile, your food and your wahala. The house is empty and boring without you. Come home soon sis. Good morning.
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huskoffailure · 2 years
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Inspirational Good Morning Sister Thoughts
Females are naturally moved with the aid of words. No girl will without difficulty overlook a compliment, commendation or encouragement. When she sees these messages, her countenance will be stuffed with joy. Your sister deserves an accolade to inspirational good morning sister quotes.
1. Wake up and smile, beauty. It’s been a while so I thought to make you smile this morning. Good Morning, Sister. 2. I know you’ll be amazed to see this, but I just wanted to remind you that I love you. Good morning beauty. 3. You’re so loving and caring. Thanks for the sumptuous meal yesterday. I’m glad to have a sweet sister like you. Good morning dear. 4. Although we argue and quarrel over trivial issues, I want to know that you mean the most to me. I can never stop loving you, sis. Good morning, enjoy today. 5. I’m proud to have a damsel like you in my life. You’re priceless sis. Have a fun-filled day. Good morning.
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obsessionality · 2 years
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Very Good Morning Quotes To Inspire You
Although we may have our very own editions as properly as choose up arguments with our sisters, analyzing to inspirational good morning quotes them in most small way offers so an awful lot pleasure and pleasure at house.
Be kind and lovely. Let your light shine towards those you meet all through today. You are a blessing to everyone. Have a wonderful day.
This is to wish you a very good morning, my wonderful sis. You are the most dependable and reliable person I have ever known.
The brightness of the sun makes this day beautiful, get up and welcome the sunny day, Good morning sister.
May this day give you more reasons to smile and be happy. You are cute, never forget that!
You are my sister so I have got every right to annoy you for a lifetime This is just to remind you that I will never stop bugging you out of nowhere Good morning.
I want to wish good morning to my sweet sister who has filled my life with happiness and smiles. Thanks for being there with me.
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lifeofa-fangirl · 2 years
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Just to see you on your knees
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Pairing: Ethan x fem!reader
Summary: Ethan bought some pants while in LA. Reader has some thoughts about them. And about him...
Word count: 2.9k
Warnings: a bit of dirty talk, Italian pet names.
A/N: The best little sister @bethanysnow wanted me to write something for her. So I did. (Thanks for all the encouragement and inspiration and long talks, sis! Love you!) As always, comments and reblogs mean everything! Also, requests are welcome.
Taglist: @bethanysnow @writingmaneskin (feel free to let me know if you want to be added to the list!)
 You slowly blinked, trying to get used to the sunlight coming from the window and warming your skin, as you tried to figure out why you had startled awake. Your hand unconsciously reached out to the other side of the bed, only to be met with cotton sheets instead of the warm body you so longed for. 
You let out a sigh, trying your best not to let the empty side of the bed ruin your mood. You were so proud of Ethan and so happy for him that the band finally got to go to the US and got to see their dreams come true. But that didn’t make you miss him any less. 
A sound coming from downstairs startled you out of your thoughts. You realized that’s what had woken you up before. And then your heart skipped a beat as you remembered. Ethan was home. He had gotten home late last night and had crawled into bed next to you. He had pressed a kiss to the back of your head after enveloping you in his arms and had whispered, “I’m home, amore mio. Sleep now, we’ll catch up in the morning.” 
The realization easily replaced the frown on your face with a bright smile. The man you loved was home again.
You would have preferred a lazy day in bed now that you were able to hold Ethan close again. To hear all about his trip while you showered him with kisses. But you had enough experience with jet lag from visiting your family in the US to know it could be a total bitch. Ethan probably had been too wide awake to stay in bed any longer. So you decided to follow his example and make your way downstairs.
You found him rummaging in the kitchen, where he was preparing some tea. English breakfast with a cloud of milk, you guessed by the smell of it. You could see the sugar standing to the side, ready to get dumped into it. The fact that he was making your favorite made your smile grow bigger. 
Ethan was standing with his back towards you and hadn’t heard you come down. It gave you a chance to lean against the doorway and take in the view. Because even after a long flight and a short night, the man before you still was a sight for sore eyes. 
He had put his hair in a messy bun and forgone putting on a shirt. The muscles of his back flexed as he reached to grab a mug - your favorite that looked like a medieval European guard tower - from the cupboard. The movement caused your breath to hitch in your throat. 
Your eyes slowly travelled lower. You took a moment to appreciate the tight cut of his pants and how it accentuated that perfect bum and - “What the hell are you wearing?!”
Ethan tensed slightly at your loud exclamation, clearly not having noticed you yet. He was, however, wearing a big smile as he turned around to face you. “And good morning to you, dolcezza. Don’t you look stunning on this lovely day!” 
He abandoned his spot near the stove and walked towards you. His arms easily found their way around your waist. He bent down to press a kiss to your lips, but you were having none of it.
“Don’t try to sweet talk me, Torchio!” You told him as you stepped away from his embrace. You tried to ignore the tingling feeling on your curves where his hands had just been. Instead you focused on the reason for your outburst. “What the hell is this?” You questioned as you pointed at his pants.
A grin spread across Ethan’s lips as he understood what you were talking about. “Oh, these pants? I got them in LA. Damiano insisted they looked” His hands went up to form air quotes around his next two words. “Mighty fine on me. He practically forced me to buy them. You don’t agree with him, amore?” To emphasis his words, he struck a model pose, making sure to stick out his behind in your direction.  
“Oh, they do!” You easily agreed. The way his ass was perfectly defined in the suit pants was not lost on you. You let out a shaky breath as you had another look. Yes, you definitely needed to commit this look to memory, for when Ethan was traveling again and you were alone with your thoughts.
A small cough from Ethan brought you back to reality. You glanced up to meet his eyes and were met with a triumphant smirk. God, you were not ready for this. Not this early in the morning. Not when he had just been gone for weeks. 
You briefly closed your eyes and shook your head to clear your thoughts and focus again. “They definitely look good on you,” you agreed again. “But darling, what the fuck is that hem? That’s a death trap if I’ve ever seen one. You’ll trip before you’re even out the door. Why didn’t you have them taken in?”
Ethan let out a chuckle when he finally understood what was upsetting you. He gave you a nonchalant shrug of his shoulders. “There wasn’t much time. And I knew you could do it for me.”
-X- 
“You could do it for me. Of course, my king. I’ll get right to it, sir.” Your voice was heavily laced with sarcasm as you grumbled to yourself. While Ethan had been gone, your mind had imagined several scenarios in which you had been on your knees in front of him, but this had not been one of them. “As if I don’t have anything else to do. When I kept this day free to spend time with you, this was not exactly what I had in mind,” you voiced your frustration out loud.
You could practically feel Ethan’s gaze burn a hole in the top of your head. You could easily imagine the confident smirk on his face right now but you refused to look up to confirm your thought.
Ethan let you work for a while, contently sipping some tea as he was towering over you. You stopped talking after you grabbed a few pins and started sticking them in his pants. It was then that he decided to speak up. “Are you telling me you aren’t enjoying this point of view, amore?”
“What I would enjoy is for you to remember to buy properly hemmed pants,” you informed him while staying focused on the pins in your hands. “But that’s just me of course. I mean, it’s not like I sew for fun anymore, so why not put my skills to good-” The rest of the sentence got caught in your throat as you looked up and realized what exactly your point of view was. 
“Oh.” Two letters, one syllable was all the sound you could muster while you stared straight at Ethan’s crotch.
“Let me repeat that. Do you like the view, amore?”
His voice was lower than usual and you could tell he was wearing a smug smirk without even looking up at his face. The realization made you let out a huff, but you couldn’t tear away your gaze from what was right in front of you. “You’re being a dick, Ethan,” you warned him softly. 
“Exactly.” Now you could hear the smugness in his voice. “I’m not hearing any complaints from you though.”
When you still refused to look up at him, you could feel Ethan’s hand on your head. He stroked your hair for a moment and you didn’t even try and stop the shiver that ran down your spine from the soft movements. 
Then, before you realized what was happening, his hand had grabbed a fistful of your hair. He used it as leverage to slightly pull you head backwards before shoving his crotch forward, only stopping just before he would touch your lips. The action caused your eyes to involuntarily shoot up to meet his. As soon as your eyes met he flashed you a lopsided smile and a suggestive eyebrow raise.
It was a quick movement, but enough to wake up something in you. He was clearly trying to get in your head. Your inner brat was not happy about that realization and decided to step up. He wanted to rile you up? Well two could play that game.
“You should be happy that I haven’t stuck you with a pin yet! I have half a mind to storm off right now. But, since I’m a loving girlfriend who actually cares…” To accompany your words you lifted your hand and slid it slowly over the seem at his crotch.
You felt Ethan’s grip on your hair loosen as soon as you put a bit of pressure. When you looked up at him again, you saw he was biting his lip hard. You shot him an innocent smile, before finishing your sentence. “About your clothes, you get to stand here and watch me on my knees. Focussed on… not you.”
You couldn’t stop a smirk from forming when you noticed that Ethan was the one all flustered now. It stroked your ego that you could get him in that state so easily. “Now stand still,” you told him while going back to your work on his pants. 
Ethan did his best to comply to your demand, even though you could feel his leg muscles twitch every now and then. From the corner of your eyes you could see his hands were clenched in tight fists and you could hear his breathing was heavier than usual. 
You continued to work in silence, hunched down deep so you could properly see what you were doing. However, every now and then your thoughts would wander to something currently located just above your head. You couldn’t get the image of Ethan’s groin out of your mind.
At one point you were distracted enough by the image that you accidentally pricked Ethan’s ankle with a pin. He hissed in pain. “Watch what you are doing, dolcezza.”
The words and his authoritative tone of sparked another wave of brattiness in you. “Oops. I’m sooo sorry.” You drew out the so on purpose, as if trying to convince him you really were sorry, as you looked up at his face. You gave him your best innocent look through your lashes, lightly biting your lip while doing so. 
Ethan’s eyes instantly darkened. Even from your low position you could hear his breathing get even heavier, but he didn’t say anything. It caused you to smirk as you went back to work. You very much enjoyed the effect you were having on him, even though you weren’t sure whether his lack of spoken reaction should worry you or not.
-X- 
“There, all done. Now go take these off. Put them in the laundry room, I’ll grab them later to properly finish the border on the sewing machine,” you instructed Ethan not much later.
You didn’t wait for him to respond, but started gathering all the stuff you had used that was now spread out on the floor around you. You heard him walk away as you walked to your crafts room to put everything back in its proper place. 
While you organized everything, you contemplated going outside for a bit. You felt like maybe you needed to put some space between Ethan and you for a bit. Being on your knees in front of him had gotten you more riled up than you wanted to admit. And while you knew the man loved you very much, you weren’t sure if he would be able to handle you if you threw yourself at him at this moment. A bit of fresh air would probably do you good. It would help clear your head and maybe cool down the burning desire inside you just a bit. 
By the time you had finished putting everything away, you had decided that you would go make yourself a nice cup of tea and go sit out on the balcony for a bit, maybe do some reading. The only problem with that thought was that when you turned around to walk to the kitchen, you realized Ethan had followed you. He was standing in the door way, effectively blocking your way to the hall. 
He had listened to you and taken of his pants. He had also forgone putting on another pair. Or a shirt. You couldn’t help but focus on his tight boxers. The view caused you to put a hand against the wall behind you to steady yourself. Yes, a bit of space between Ethan and you would definitely be good now. But one look at his face told you that wasn’t going to happen anytime soon. 
You knew it would be a losing battle, but stubborn as you were, you could not just give in to your desire to ravish him then and there. You slowly leaned back against the wall completely and tried to keep your voice as level as possible when you asked, “Hi Torchio. Is there anything else I can help you with?” You crossed your arms in front of your chest and did your best to appear unfazed by his appearance.
“Oh, I can think of a few things.” Ethan spoke in a low voice while he slowly walked closer to you.
You had to use all your willpower to not shift your gaze down, but managed to keep staring in Ethan’s eyes at he came closer. You drew in a shaky breath before you questioned, “Care to elaborate on that?”
Ethan didn’t immediately respond, he just continued coming closer, until your bodies were almost touching. Then he put one leg between yours, his thigh gently grazing against your groin. You quietly moaned at the touch. You wanted to let your eyes fall closed, but forced yourself to keep them open. You wanted to commit the look on his face to memory. You wanted to remember the lust that took over when he realized you were not wearing panties underneath your shorts.
You knew he could tell how turned out you were by the dominance he had been displaying all morning. The crotch of your shorts was far beyond damp at this point. 
Ethan placed his hands against the wall on either side of your head. Then he confirmed your thought when he bent closer and whispered in your ear, “Oh, clearly you get exactly what I mean by that, you dirty girl.”
The next moment Ethan’s body was finally fully pressed up against yours, effectively trapping your body against the wall, while your lips were trapped in what was quickly becoming a heated kiss. He pulled your bottom lip between his teeth after a while. Even with your eyes closed, you could feel him smile when you let out a loud moan. His tongue quickly lapped over the spot where his teeth has just been before his lips moved to the bottom of your neck, right above your collar bone. The little nibs and laps of his tongue made you want to rub your thighs together, but you were prevented from doing so by Ethan’s leg still in place between yours. 
One of his hands was getting lost in your hair while the other slowly started traveling lower over your shirt. He let out an appreciative groan when he grabbed your braless breast and your nipple immediately stood to attention. He gave it a quick pinch before continuing his journey downward. 
His fingers were about to dip below the waistband of your shorts when his movements suddenly stopped. You let out a disappointed whimper when his lips left your neck, only to shiver when you felt his hot breath on your ear. “I’m gonna need you to be a good girl for me, think you can do that amore?”
You wanted to answer negatively so badly, just to tease him. But the dark look in Ethan’s eyes convinced you to bite your tongue. Instead, you opted for a simple, “Yes, sir.” You could, however, not help the slightly mocking tone your voice got or the half smile that crept onto your face as you spoke the words. 
Your reaction didn’t go unnoticed by Ethan. “Tsk, tsk. I’ve been gone for two weeks and you turned into an even bigger brat than usual? I think I should remind you who sets the rules around here."
Before you had a chance to comment, he had detached his body from yours. He grabbed your wrist and dragged you out of your room. It wasn’t lost on you that you were being pulled into the direction of the bedroom. 
What also wasn’t lost on you was Ethan’s cell phone, that lighted up on the living room table just as you passed it. Ethan didn’t stop or acknowledge it, but your glance at it was enough to see a message from Damiano had popped up. You could just make out the words pants, plan and work out. “Wait, you planned for things to go exactly this way, didn’t you?”
Ethan let out a chuckle as he pulled you over the doorstep of your bedroom. “Oh amore, you don’t even know the half of what things I have planned. Let’s just say that it’s a good thing you made no particular plans for the rest of the day. Or tomorrow,” he stated with a devilishly delicious smirk, before closing the bedroom door behind you.
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galatially · 2 years
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I see you’re taking requests. Number 73: "You've never let me down." looks good for maybe a little something angsty with Druig 👀
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𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 — 𝐝𝐫𝐮𝐢𝐠 x 𝐢𝐦𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐚𝐥!𝐛𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐤!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫
𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 — 3K
𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 — strong language, so much angst y'all and I'm not sorry about it lol, fluff, brooding!Druig
𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 — this took me entirely too long to finish but we got there in the end 😂😂
One thousand six-hundred fifty two years, sixty-four days, four hours, and fifty-nine minutes.
The approximate number of years you’ve been alive. A birthday of sorts since you’d stopped celebrating your actual birthday too many years prior to remember. It’s one of the things you loved about migrating from city to city; you could fudge that little detail for each new person you came across. What harm would it do for you to celebrate different days with people you’d never see again?
Then, one morning you woke up. You realized that you’d been spending the last fifty-two years ignoring your solitude. Cities blurred together for you, faces fading as you regarded them. If you were honest, half the fun of pretending was changing location every year or two. The other half was forgetting yourself in the warmth of strangers.
You blew out a breath and grabbed your phone from your nightstand; half past seven. You groaned and pushed yourself out of your bed.
Time to start the day.
You quickly padded down your freezing hallway (winters in the Midwest never got easier, no matter how long in between years you’d try to live there) and ducked into your bathroom. You turned on your speaker, playing your favorite song as of late: a smooth R&B track that reminded you of your days attending a church in Michigan about fifty years back, soulful and gut-wrenching in its beauty.
As you were finishing putting on your moisturizer, your phone started ringing,
“Hello?”
“I need you to come get your boyfriend.” The voice was pleading. “He’s been teaching my son the words 'existential dread' and all I want to do is watch The Nanny with my husband in peace.”
You chuckled. “Good morning to you, too, Phastos.”
“Y/N, you’re my best friend and I love you dearly. Druig is…kind of my brother? Anyway, I don’t know what’s wrong with him right now but I don’t need my seven-year-old quoting him.”
“I don’t know, either, Phastos. I haven’t spoken to him in years.” You rubbed the back of your neck. “Last I heard, he was with Kingo in L.A.”
“He got here late last night. When I asked him about staying with you, he gave me this look and went to the spare room. Finally came down an hour ago, lamenting about how he’s useless or something.”
“Give me half an hour. I’ll be there.”
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“Auntie Y/N!”
You half-knelt and outstretched your arms to the little boy. “Jack, my sweet boy!”
He vaulted into your arms, giggling as you pressed kisses to both of his cheeks.
“Look at how big you’ve gotten, bubba! You’re almost as tall as I am!”
“Y/N, lovely to see you,” a calm voice said.
You were always taken aback by her severe beauty, the kind that took the breath from your lungs when her gaze locked with yours. This was the warrior woman that inspired so many myths and legends. This was the fearsome warrior goddess that fought valiantly for thousands of years. This was your on and off lover’s elder sister.
“It’s nice to see you, too, Thena.” You rose to your feet and walked into her open arms. “You look good.”
“I’m feeling…better, in some ways. Bad in others.” She raised a brow. “You’re here for Druig, yes?”
You chuckled. “I’m here to check on him for Phastos, yes.”
“For Phastos? Interesting.”
Even in the last twenty years of you knowing the Eternals, you could never quite get a read on Thena. When her Mahd Wy’ry symptoms weren’t making her incoherent, she spoke mostly in riddles with you. Perceptive smiles, knowing glances. You liked to think that it was her that told Ajak about you and Druig’s kiss all those years ago, igniting the rumors that his family had already been spreading amongst themselves.
“He called this morning, told me what was happening with Druig.”
“He’s been quite the brood.” She looked to Jack with a smile on her lips. “Isn’t that right, Jack?”
“He’s been in the backyard chopping wood all morning,” your godson answered. “I think he’s sad.”
Your features fell some and you didn’t have to look at Thena to know that she noticed. Of course she did. You knelt down to Jack’s level, your hands cupping his cheeks. “Then I guess I’ll just have to go see what’s up, huh, bubba?” You kissed the top of his head. “Why do you and Auntie Thena go see your dads, okay? I’ll catch up later. “
“Come, Jack,” Thena held out a hand to the boy, “let’s go see what your parents are watching today.”
Jack gave you a kiss on the cheek and took hold of Thena’s hand. She gave you one last smile before disappearing into the house.
You sighed and rose to your feet, unease twisting in your gut. How long had it been since you last saw Druig? Ten, fifteen years? He disappeared after an especially heated night between you two that left you both in each other’s arms as the rain pattered against your bedroom window.
For a second, you wanted to run. Drive back home and pretend you’d never been called here. What was the point? Druig had had more than enough time, more than enough opportunities, to reach out and he didn’t. Anytime you’d go to call, fear seized in your throat and you’d put the phone down. If you two couldn’t even keep up basic communication, then what would you being here mean?
Before you could even settle on a decision, your feet had carried you around the back of the house. You heard the heavy thwack of metal hitting wood before you were met with Druig’s muscular back. If this were a different time, you’d throw a flirty comment his way or you’d rest your chin in the curve of his shoulder and kiss the spot below his ear, smiling at the shudder he’d give.
“Druig.”
He looked over his shoulder at you, his blue eyes giving you a quick glance over before going back to his task.
“Phastos called,” you continued, walking to his left side. “Said that you were being melancholic and converting his son to depressive angst.”
“‘M fine.” He raised the ax over his head. “I’ll tell Phastos to quit worryin’.”
“You won’t even look at me?” You shoved your hands in your pockets. “After all of this time, you can’t look me in the eyes?”
Druig spun to face you, the axe lowered to his side. “There. Satisfied?”
You let out a scoff. “You know what? I don’t even know why I’m doing this.”
“Excuse me?”
“I’ll go tell Phastos myself that you’re fine. You don’t have to worry about me anymore.” You started walking away, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of seeing the tears lining your eyes. He didn’t call after you.
Why would he?
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“Phastos, it’s fine. I’m fine.”
You closed your front door with the heel of your foot and put your keys in the bowl on the console beside your front door, your mind still on Druig and his lack of engagement with you.
“If it makes you feel any better, Druig’s been holed up in the spare room since you left.”
“Alas, that does not make me feel any better,” you said, chuckling. “In fact, it worries me more.” You toed off your shoes, cradling your phone between shoulder and your cheek. “I don’t like knowing that he’s choosing to be alone rather than talking to anyone.”
“I don’t know about him but it’s been hard since that battle with Arimesh. We’ve all been trying to keep in better contact but, for some of us, things won’t ever be the same. Ben and I took Jack and moved into Ajak’s old place with Thena who is strangely a good babysitter given her condition. Sersi and Sprite are back in London trying to figure out what happened to her boyfriend, Dane. Makkari’s traipsing the galaxy looking for other Eternals.”
“Kingo’s making another movie,” you added.
“What I’m saying is that I don’t know if Druig has ever felt comfortable unburdening himself outside of heightened situations.,” Phastos continued, “The last time I’ve ever seen him get even the slightest bit incensed was in Spain all those years ago. The last time any of us saw each other until now.”
You let out a bitter chuckle. “So you’re saying I have to wait another half millennia until he speaks to me?”
“I’m sure he’ll come around, Y/N. Just give him space, I guess.”
“Don’t worry, he won’t be hearing from me anytime soon.” You rid yourself of your coat and start towards your kitchen. “I’m taking a trip.”
“A trip? Where?”
“I’m thinking New York, upper Manhattan. I have a friend there.”
“You’ll come visit before you leave again, won’t you?” You heard Phastos clear his throat. “Makkari’s coming home soon and I know she’d love to see you. Sersi, too.”
You smiled. “Invite everyone and give me a proper sendoff, Phastos. I’ll love it.”
“You better! Ben’s upset he missed you earlier.”
“I will!” A noise echoed from the hallway. “Hey, Phastos, kiss the boys for me and give Thena my love, okay? I’ve got to go.” You hung up, grabbing a knife from the block and looked towards your room. Your heart wracked against your chest, roaring in your ears. The rustling got louder, loud thumps and heavy footfalls, as you tightened your hand around the handle of the knife. You took a sobering breath and started down the hall. Your bedroom door flew open and you launched yourself forward, knife held high.
Strong hands gripped your wrists, forcing the weapon from your hand. You winced and let out a yelp as you were shoved into the wall with blue eyes staring back into yours.
“Calm down. It’s just me.”
Your vision focused and you let out a choked huff. The last time you were this close to each other, his hands touched parts of your body so sensually and so consumingly that even to this day, you can still feel the drag and pull of his callused hands. His breath fanned against your face and his touch scorched your skin the longer he held onto your wrists.
“Druig? What the hell are you doing here!”
“I came to see you. Obviously.”
You were hot all over again, suddenly small and nervous under his gaze. But you wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of knowing how much he affected you. “You saw me earlier and couldn’t bother to even look at me.”
“That was a…mistake,” he said, his head hung low. “Phastos told me that you were comin’ but I didn’t believe him. We’ve haven’t seen each other in, what, ten years?”
“Fifteen,” you said, your voice hard.
Druig frowned. “What?”
“I was in front of you fifteen years ago; you fucked me in a shitty motel room and disappeared the next morning.”
He winced like he’d been struck. “‘M sorry.”
“It’s fine. It was a long time ago.” You moved out of his grip and wrapped your arms around yourself. “I heard about Ajak. I’m sorry.”
“Yeah. Ikaris is lucky that Sersi’s more forgivin' than I am. I’d have launched him into the sun myself.” The corner if his mouth lifted. “You look good, Y/N. Really good.”
Your face warmed. “I haven’t changed all that much, Druig. Still the same girl you met in the seventies.”
His brows creased and he blew out a breath, “I wanted to do this differently. Say things better.”
“Say what? Why you left me that night? Why you stayed away for so long? Phastos told me that you’ve barely visited any of your family since what happened with the Deviants.”
“I’ve been trying to find you,” Druig confessed huskily.
Your eyes widened. “Me? Why?”
“Because I was an asshole that night. I —” He ran a hand through his auburn locks. “You know you’re the first person that’s ever held me? Not given me a short hug or a weak hand hold, but held me close with your chest against my back, your hands locked in against my stomach? You held me with a tenderness I’ve never felt before. Like I’d disappear if you opened your eyes too soon.”
“I told you that I loved you, Druig! Do you know how hard that was for me?”
“You don’t love me. You can’t.”
You frowned, your chest burning with simmering rage. “Who are you to tell me that? You left! I didn’t get a note or a phone call for fifteen years!” You let out a small sob. “The first six months I decided that it had to be me. That the five years of us dancing around each other was bound to end the day that we stopped. After the first year, I kept busy. Moved around for three months at a time, hopped from job to job.” You cut your gaze to his. “I guess I shouldn’t be surprised that you didn’t even spare me a thought, huh?”
“I’ve thought about you every day, Y/N.” He shook his head. “You don’t think I’ve been hatin’ myself ever since I left you that night? Of course! That I haven’t wished that I wasn’t much a fuckin’ coward and told you how I felt? Of course!”
“Bullshit!”
His mouth slanted over yours in a heated kiss that took the breath from your lungs.
Your back hit the wall, a breathy squeal leaving your lips. In the very corner of your mind, the memory of your last night with Druig played; the fevered touches, your body against his.
“Y/N…” His voice was rough.
You nodded in silent agreement as you took hold of his jacket collar and pulled him into your bedroom.
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To your surprise, Druig didn’t disappear.
As you lie in each other’s arms, a tense silence bubbled around you. Neither of you wanted to speak first for fear of shattering the false promise of whatever it is you were right now.
“I’ve missed this,” he said, running the backs of his fingers along your forearm.
You didn’t answer, focusing on the pad of your pointer finger circling against his bare breast.
“I’m sorry, Y/N.”
You frowned and looked up at him. “For what?”
“I wanted to stay that night. I wanted to wake up next to you and get breakfast and completely lose myself in you.” He pressed a soft kiss to your forehead. “I don’t think I’ve ever felt this way about anyone before.”
You heard the faraway lilt to his voice and Christ, did it make your chest ache. It took everything you had not to wrap him into your arms, his mouth against the column of your neck like the missing piece of a puzzle. Instead you waited for him to gather his thoughts, skimming the tip of your nose along his collarbone.
“And then I remembered who I was, what being with me could mean for you, and I left. I left and told myself that it was for the best and I let you down, Y/N, and I’m sorry.”
“What do you mean ‘let me down’?”
Druig stiffened.
You let out an angry scoff. “You showed up here, Druig. You. You tell me you want to talk and all you’ve done is just speak in riddles! What are you trying to say!”
Druig pulled you further into his chest and rested his chin on the top of your head. “I’m over seven thousand years old, Y/N. I fight genetically-modified beings to keep the universe’s balance. I can manipulate the minds of whomever I choose. And even with all of those things, I couldn’t do the one thing I want more than anything.”
“What?” Your voice is airy.
“Loving you,” tears brimmed along his eyes, “I love you more than anything I’ve ever known and I let you down by hurting you.”
You shook your head. “No, you didn’t. You’ve never let me down.”
“Unlikely.”
You pushed yourself up on one arm and leveled your gaze with his. “You’ve hurt my feelings. Maybe even bruised my ego some. But you have never let me down in any way, Druig. Do you think that I’d drop everything to come to you if you let me down?”
“You’re a good person, Y/N.”
“Good people can still get hurt, Druig, you know that. I remember you telling me once that humanity broke your heart. Have let you down time and time again. Why do you still protect them?” He raised a brow. “Because you love them. You love their greed, their hubris, their compassion.” You chuckled. “It’s one of the things I love most about you.”
“You love me?”
You cupped his cheek with your free hand. “Until I finally die, unfortunately.”
He smiled against your palm. “If I tell you the same, would you believe me?”
“I think you’ll have to convince me.” You smiled at his confused expression. “Make me breakfast and we’ll see how I feel.”
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𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 — i used to do end notes on w*ttp*d back in the day to add my unsolicited commentary on my stories and i kind of want to do it here??? let me know if that's too much lol
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lovely dividers by @firefly-graphics
63 notes · View notes
peachbear88 · 3 years
Text
The Greatest Love Story
A/N: Inspired by this lovely image I saw. I'm making this into a high school angst AU that takes place in like the 1900's. For the record, I know Steve isn't a bad person but this is an AU and I need one of those... You know, guys for this story so.... Yeah! Sorry! BTW, the second poem is not written by me, it's written by Elizabeth Barrett Browning and I stole some quotes from Shakespeare.
Warnings: Angst, homophobia, swearing, character death.
Word Count: 3.2k
Pairing: Yelena Belova x Reader
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You scale the ancient wooden stairs of your small school. avoiding eye contact with anyone. The stares you receive from others are painfully obvious as you speed walk towards the library, seeking shelter from the judgmental glances from your peers.
"Hello dear," the kind librarian greets you as you walk past her towards your corner of the library.
You don't respond, quickly ducking behind the massive shelves, hoping to spend as much time as possible in your safe space before the classes start. Placing back your old books, you scan the shelves, until a particular title catches your eye.
"Love Poems by Women?" You murmur, flipping through the worn pages.
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A giant dusty book lands on the librarian's desk, making her look up.
"May I take this out?" You ask, your tone emotionless, cold yet tentative. The librarian smiles gently at you handing you back the book.
"Of course dear. Happy reading." You give her a small, thankful smile before dashing out of the library door. The halls are partially empty, save for the kids that skip class, hanging around in the hallways and dark alleys after school.
You duck your head, avoiding eye contact as you pass the group leaning against the lockers, most importantly, the hazel eyed beauty that could snap your neck in half, Yelena Belova.
"Hey!" Your head snaps up. Big mistake. You lock eyes with the famed blonde and you drop your head immediately, a faint blush creeping up your cheeks.
"Y-Yes?"
"Look at me when I'm talking to you." She snaps. You peek at her from the corner of your eye, her sleek dress pants catching your eye.
"Interesting outfit choice," you note before you can stop yourself.
"What did you say?" She demands and you gulp, backing away.
"N-nothing." She slowly steps towards you, backing you into the lockers.
"Get to class. And don't ever let me see you again идиот (idiot)." You hurry down the hall towards your classroom, tripping in the process as you repeatedly look over your shoulder, watching as Yelena turns back to her friend group.
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"She was cute," Natasha points out as Yelena reclaims her spot leaning against the lockers. "Why do you feel the need to tease her so relentlessly?" Yelena rolls her eyes, grabbing the flask of vodka back from her sister.
"She's annoying. I don't like her." Natasha smirks.
"Sure. Whatever you say."
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You let out a sigh of relief when the bell rings.
Your classmates flood out of the classroom, jostling each other aside in their rush to get home. You quickly sprint out the door, eager to get home, safe and sound when a hand grabs you by the arm and pulls you into a dark alley behind the school.
"Hello there girly..." A deep voice says. You gulp. The boy steps into the light to reveal Steve Rogers. One of those people that take pride in hurting others, a bully, your tormenter.
"W-what do you want?" He smirks, stepping closer to you.
"Well, a little birdie told me that someone had an encounter with a specific blonde this morning." You flinch when he grabs you by the throat, pinning you to the wall. "You wouldn't happen to be... I don't know, one of those dykes would you?" Your eyes widen and you shake your head vigorously as he laughs. "Oh man," he sputters, choking through his laughter. "Wait till the school gets ahold of this-"
He doesn't get to finish his sentence because a fist connects with his face, sending him reeling backwards.
"What the-" A strong hand wraps around his throat, pushing him backwards till his back connects with the wall.
"Listen to me you маленькое дерьмо (little shit), if you ever even think about coming near her again, I will sneak into your house at night, gut you like the fish you are and paint the school with them." Yelena warns in a surprisingly calm voice. Steve's eyes widen and he nods his head frantically until she lets go.
"Crazy bitch!" He spits, backing away quickly. You shuffle your feet, looking down at the ground as she watches him run.
"T-thank you." You mutter, not daring to look her in the eye. She sighs.
"This better not become a daily thing Y/L/N." You nod feebly. "Get out of here." You quickly pick your bag back up and sprint out of the alley, leaving Yelena by herself,
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"I'm home mom!"
"Welcome home sweetie!" Your mom pokes her head out of the living room.
"How's your book going?"
"As great as a woman writing a book can be." She chuckles forcibly. There's an awkward silence before she continues. "Your father came by today." She pauses as you swallow, feeling like something lodged itself in your throat.
"And what did he want?" She frowns at your tone.
"Sweetie, I know you don't like him but he's still your fa-"
"I don't have a dad," you growl, picking up your bag. "My dad died when he chose to abandon us." She watches as you climb up the stairs, sighing and rubbing her temple.
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You flop onto your bed, dropping the thick dusty buck onto the bed. You spend the rest of the afternoon reading through the poems until your mom calls you down for dinner.
It's an awkward dinner, quiet, only the sounds of dishes, chewing and utensils filling the room.
"I'm going to bed." You say after washing the dishes, not bothering to wait for a response.
That night, you lay in bed, staring at the ceiling of your room.
"Love poems by women." You mutter, an idea popping into your head. You quickly sit up, flicking on your lamp and pulling out the book and a pen.
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"Good morning dear," the librarian greets you like she does every morning.
"I'd like to return this book." You reply coldly, passing her the book once again. She smiles gently at you.
"I hope you enjoyed your reading." She says while passing you, returning the book to its original shelf.
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"Hello hon, can I help you with anything?" The librarian asks the dirty-blonde haired girl.
"No, thank you." The girl sends the librarian a tight lipped smile before returning her attention to the shelves. A ripped leather cover catches her attention. Love Poems by Women. She smiles, pulling the book from the shelf. Flipping open to the title page, a neat cursive catches her eyes.
Love flows between beings Gift from the gods Curse from the demons The missing part of every person Destined to be opposites Love is flexible Yet some seek to objectify love Love is not for the weak willed. - Aristophanes
The blonde haired girl hums, pulling a pen from her jacket's pocket and discreetly writing in the book, right next to the poem.
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Terrible.
That's the only way to describe your day. You received your essay back, ecstatic to see that you had received an A. Steve on the other hand had absolutely flunked. Instead of dedicating his time to studying, he decided to beat you up as a way of taking out his frustration.
You ended up limping out of the women's toilet, your leg flaring up whenever you moved, tears threatening to fall from your eyes.
"Hi sweetcheeks," the librarian murmurs, her eyes trailing down your injured leg.
"'Ello." You quickly duck behind the shelves, pulling out the book you were looking for. Your brows scrunch together in confusion as you see a messier scrawl next to your handwriting.
Reality hits hard
How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. I love thee to the depth and breadth and height My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight For the ends of being and ideal grace. I love thee to the level of every day's Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light. I love thee freely, as men strive for right. I love thee purely, as they turn from praise. I love thee with the passion put to use In my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith. I love thee with a love I seemed to lose With my lost saints. I love thee with the breath, Smiles, tears, of all my life; and, if God choose, I shall but love thee better after death.
- Orpheus
You smile letting a light laugh slip from your lips. A sweet titter revealing the little girl underneath your cold, traumatized exterior.
Quickly, you grab your pen from your pocket and begin scribbling.
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The air is knocked from your body as your back makes contact with the floor.
"Listen here dyke. I don't like you alright," Steve growls into your ear as Tony cracks his knuckles. "So here's what's going to happen: Everyday you're going to meet us here and," he pauses, cracking his neck. "Help us relive some stress." He smiles wickedly before punching you in the stomach, making you double over in pain.
Your eyes flutter shut as they deliver blow after blow 'till they finally stop. You tentatively open your eyes to see Yelena tackling Steve to the ground as Tony stares at them, eyes wide.
"I. Told. You. To. Leave. Her. Alone!" She screams, pummeling Steve with her fists. He groans, unmoving. You watch in terror as Tony picks up a trash can lid, sneaking up behind her as she punches Steve in the face.
"Watch out!" You scream, taking Tony as well yourself by surprise. She looks up to see you slamming into Tony sending him flying into the nearby wall of the alley.
He crumples, unconscious.
"Are you okay?" You mumble, limping towards Yelena, who's clutching a blood gash on her arm.
"'M fine,' she grits out. You shake your head, grabbing her wrist. She flinches but doesn't push you away.
"You're not okay. Let me help you." You plead. She stays silent and you quickly take her silence as a yes, leading her to the front steps of your home. You rummage through your back pack, finding a large wrap of bandages that you kept after your daily beating from Rogers and his friends.
She winces as you wrap her wound swiftly.
"Gentle!" She growls and you stare back at her defiantly.
"Well maybe if you would stop moving, it'd hurt less!" You retort and she shuts up, staring off into the distance. You dab the cut with a small bit of alcohol before wrapping the bandage all around her arm.
"Thank you." She whispers, giving you a small smile. Reaching out, she gently tucks a strand of hair behind your ear as you flinch back. You quickly, shovel the bandages and medicinal alcohol back into your pack, not noticing the hurt look on her face.
"No problem. The least I could do since you saved me." You reply bluntly, swinging the bag over your shoulder and slipping through the door.
"Wait-" She sighs as the door slams shut in front of her.
You exhale, leaning against the door as you try to catch your breath.
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Yelena sighs exasperatedly, tugging at the collar of her dress shirt.
"What's wrong little sis?" Natasha smirks, plopping down next to her.
"I got hurt and Y/N patched me up." Natasha jumps up, eyes wide.
"You stained your new shirt?" She groans shaking Yelena violently. "God I'm going to kill you!" Yelena grabs her sister, stopping her.
"You're missing the point!"
"Oh yeah? And what's that?" Nat challenges, flopping back down on to the couch.
"She patched me up!" Nat's eyes widen.
"Oh. Oh." She inches closer to her sister, nudging her playfully, much to Yelena's dislike. "So are y'all like," she winks at her sister insinuatingly. "A thing?" Yelena scrunches her brows in confusion.
"A thing?" Nat rolls her eyes, sidling closer to her.
"Yes. A thing. An item? Lovers?" She shrugs, missing the way Yelena blushes.
"In her dreams," Yelena snorts, leaning back into the couch.
"If you say so..."
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"Morning pumpkin!" The librarian chirps.
The blonde girl ignores her, breezing past her towards the the shelves at the very back, peeking over her shoulder quickly before pulling an old, leather bound book from the shelf.
She flips the leather cover aside to reveal the title page. Next to her messy, distorted scrawl was a neat, distinctive cursive once again.
Speak low if you speak love
- Aristophanes
She smiles gently, chuckling as she shakes her head.
"Shakespeare of all people," she whispers, her accent thickening. Pulling a forgotten pen from the shelves, she begins writing,
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The highlight of your day became going to the library and reading the little messages scrawled in between the margins of the book by Orpheus. Like:
If music be the food of love, play on
Or
Her passions are made of nothing but the finest part of pure love.
They made you smile on a daily basis, sometimes even eliciting a rare light laugh.
"Good morning sweetpea." The librarian greets you, not expecting a response. To her surprise and yours, you muster a small smile and a wave.
"Hello." You can feel the librarians shocked eyes following you as you round the bookshelf corner to find Steve, eyes wide, mouth open in shock as he stares down at something in his hands.
Your heart plummets. A book with a soft leather cover, yellowed pages. The book of poems.
You lunge for it but he step sides you swiftly, raising the book above his head.
"Speak low if you speak of love huh? I'm not surprised you know Shakespeare, you're such a nerd." He sneers, waving the book above his head.
"I-I don't know what you're talking about." You stutter, backing up. He grabs you by the collar of your shirt, lifting you into the air.
"Don't fuck with me!" He growls, dropping the book and kicking it to the side. "Who's Orpheus?"
"G-Greek hero. Musician." You stutter and he slaps you, hard. You can feel your cheek swelling under his fiery gaze.
"Don't even try me. Who. Is. Orpheus?"
"I don't know, I swear!" You mutter, wincing when you accidentally bite your cheek.
He drops you, watching as you scramble to your feet, backing away.
"This isn't over you little shit. I'll be back for you," he warns, giving your book one last kick for good measure before storming out of the library with Tony and Bucky on his heels.
You fall to your knees, silently sobbing as you crawl over too the book, dusting it off and hugging it to your chest.
Yelena sighs, her heart breaking as she watches you curl around the book protectively, lying on the floor.
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"Where are you going?"
Yelena turns to find Nat, leaning against the school stairwell doorway, watching her.
"Just up to the roof. Need some fresh air," she lies, avoiding Nat's gaze. Nat lifts Yelena's chin up, staring into her eyes, boring into her very soul. Yelena squirms under her gaze until she finally lets go.
"Okay."
"Okay?"
"Okay." She smiles sadly at her little sister. "Just-" Her voice cracks as she pats her sister's shoulder. "Don't do anything stupid."
"Don't worry. I won't." She gives Nat a brief hug before hiking her pants up and starting up the stairs.
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"Ah, well look who decided to join the party!" You look up from the ground to see Yelena, your eyes clouded with pain.
"No..." You croak but Steve pays no attention to you.
"Come to save your love Yelena?" He sneers, dropping you to the ground. "Or should I say... Orpheus?" Your eyes widen as you watch him advance towards her, pushing her closer to the edge of the roof.
"I don't know what you're talking about." She deadpans and Steve chuckles.
"Sure. If you won't admit, I'll just have to settle for destroying you from the inside out instead." He grabs her by the arm. "I haven't forgotten what you did to me." He points at a long thin scar along his jawline.
You watch as Tony sneaks up from behind Yelena, striking her with a metal bar. She crumples, falling to her knees.
"Hold her." Steve directs and Bucky dutifully grabs you by the arms. He holds Yelena's chin in between his thumb and forefinger, forcing her to look at him. "Now you watch as I destroy the one thing you love the most." Tony tosses his the metal bar and Steve prepares himself before swinging it like a baseball bat.
There's a sickening crunch followed by your scream as the bar makes contact with your ribs.
"Stop!" She struggles, her eyes never leaving your broken body as he hits you over and over again. "Please! Leave her alone!"
Steve smiles evilly, locking eyes with her before swinging the bat again. Another scream. Blood trickles down your face from your nose.
"Is that right? Did the famous Yelena Belova just beg me?" He smiles cruelly before pushing you down on your back, his foot on your chest. You scream as he increases the pressure, your broken ribs digging into your lungs.
Yelena screams, kicking Tony's legs out from under him before punching Steve in the jaw. She grabs the iron bar before it hits the ground, clobbering Bucky in the stomach before kicking Steve in the stomach.
"ты сука (you bitch)!" She steps on his face swiftly, taking satisfaction in the groan of pain he emits before turning to you, gently cradling your face.
"Wow... That was pretty badass," you mumble and she laughs, tearing up. You reach out, wiping the tears from her eyes. "Don't cry." She frowns.
"I'm not crying."
"You are too." You smile, wincing in pain. "I didn't know you knew Shakespeare."
"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have let this happen." You frown, caressing her face, forcing her to look at you.
"Hey, hey. It's fine. Don't worry. I'll be fine." You attempt to smile reassuringly but it comes out as more of a grimace. "Listen, if I don't make it-"
"Don't say that! You can't leave me!"
"Shush, listen you thickheaded poet. If I don't make it, go back to the book." You instruct her. She frowns but you can her off. "Promise me."
"But-"
"Promise me."
"I promise..."
"Good." You smile at her, pressing a gentle kiss to her forehead, your eyesight blurring. "Wait for me okay?" Your eyes flutter shut.
"No! No Y/N! Come back!" She shakes you roughly, sobbing when you don't respond.
----------
Yelena watches as your body is carted off under a white sheet. Nat stands to the side, watching as her sister stares off into the distance, all life drained from her body.
Go back to the book.
She stands, slowly trailing towards the library, her eyes bloodshot, cheeks caked with dry tears.
"Hi dear," the librarian greets her, discreetly wiping her eyes with a handkerchief. "What a shame. She was a lovely girl."
"She really was the best." Yelena agrees quietly, giving the librarian a small, comforting pat on the back before moving to the back of the library where she finds the book, lying on the floor.
Yelena,
I believe that we are the greatest love poem ever written. I love you always,
Y/N
A choked sob escapes her lips as she stares at the page. You knew. You knew the whole time and you didn't even say anything. A pair of soft arms wrap around Yelena's stomach as she lets go of the dam, her cries echoing throughout the library.
"I'm sorry..."
I'm sorry...
----------
Taglist: @username23345 @musicinourlips @gingerbreadcookieforlife @xxxtwilightaxelxxx @trikruismybitch @ima-gi--na-tion @nicole-rayleigh-hot @olsensnpm @peabrain112
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Text
Have you lost your mind?
summary: Azriel gets lectured by Rhysand and Cassian about his constant flirting with Elain, not knowing that she was hiding in the closet.
authors note: hello! This is my second one-shot (I might make this into a small series) This was inspired by a certain scene in The Office ;) and I’d like to thank @shedoessoshedoes for listening to my random ideas and giving me feedback and making this so much better!
Warning: English isn’t my first language.
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Azriel didn’t like change. 
He really didn’t. But something had changed about his mornings. He used to love to wake up to the smell of black coffee, but that had changed since he met her. His new favourite thing was waking up to find Elain tucked in between his shoulder and his chest, sound asleep. 
He would never get bored of watching her sleep, he looked down at a sleeping Elain. He didn’t want to move and accidentally wake her up, even though he missed her big brown eyes looking up at him. 
 “What are you doing?” She asked, pulling Azriel out of his trance. She pushed herself up, sitting up against the headboard. She pushed her long honey-brown locks away from her face and threw it in a ponytail.
“Enjoying the scenery,” He simply responded before he sat up, leaning against the headboard.
Elain dipped her head, she was blushing a thousand shades of red. He hooked his index finger below her chin and gently tilted her head up, to look at him. He smiled, a loopy one nonetheless, and began to smother her face with light and tender kisses. “Az!” She squealed, squirming as he pulled Elain under him. 
“I gotta show some love somehow, don’t I?” He murmured as he began to press kisses along her jaw and down her neck.
She giggled, a bright smile on her face. She found herself growing excited as his grip on her hips began to tighten as she began to tug off the shirt she was wearing which she had snagged from his closet. Before they went any further, a loud bang broke the silence that had occupied the house. He recognized the footsteps that marched up the stairs, it was Cass and Rhys, who had gotten married to Elain’s sisters recently and were Azriel’s college mates in Velaris University.
The fuck? What are they doing here?
 Azriel kissed Elain’s cheek before he pulled his shirt over her shoulders and rolled off of her, hopping out of the bed with Elain close behind him. She realized it was her brothers in law when she saw Azriel’s eyes widen, she quickly pushed herself into his closet, hiding in between his hoodies before her brothers-in-law walked into Azriel’s room. 
Two weeks ago, after Nesta and Cassian’s rehearsal dinner, Azriel confessed his feelings to Elain. God, it terrified him when he admitted his feelings to his best friend. He didn’t want to ruin what they had. They met in University, before Elain opened her flower shop, and had became very close friends. 
What if she didn’t reciprocate his feelings? He worried, every rational fear flew through the window the minute Elain went on her tippy toes and kissed him.
Ever since that night, they have been together, in secret. Suspicions began to arise when Azriel and Elain to quietly flirt between themselves and began to sit next to each other every time the family went out. Small touches here and there, a hand on the small of her back, an arm around her shoulder. 
One time when everyone went out for dinner, he slipped his hand under the table trying to tease her, but his hand landed on Amren’s thigh. 
He didn’t know if he was going to make it alive tonight when Amren’s piercing gaze fell on Azriel’s face. One brow raised at him and he quickly retracted his hand in fear in fear while a small laugh erupted from across the table from Elain. They were a bit tipsy, but the mother, Azriel could've gotten drunk on the sound of Elain’s laugh.
He didn’t forget what she had done. He raised his brows, in challenge and nodded. Oh she was to pay for this, he would make sure of it. 
Nesta Archeron was always the mama bear while Elain was the cub but it was Feyre who noticed the occasional hand around her waist, the sly smiles and winks that were thrown across the table. She talked to her husband, Rhysand, and told him of her suspicions, which led them to this moment.
Azriel shut the closet door, making sure Elain wasn’t visible and then quickly sat back on his bed before Rhysand and Cassian welcomed themselves into his room. “She is like my little sister!” Rhysand exclaimed as he glared at Azriel. “I don’t want to see you sniffing around her anymore. Boy, have you lost your mind? Cause I’ll help you find it.” 
Azriel's gaze shifted to the closet, where the said sister, Elain, was hiding. 
“What are you looking at? I’m not going to hold Nesta back when you cuts you to pieces, The Mother could come through that door and she’s not going to help you if you keep flirting with Elain!” Cassian exclaimed. 
“Can I know what I did to earn a lovely lecture at-” He looked at the alarm that sat on his bedside table. “At nine in the morning?” 
“Feyre talked to me and said that she thinks that something is going on between you and El.” Rhysand explained, his violet eyes glaring at him as his arms crossed across his chest.
“And if something was going on between us?”
“Then good luck, because Nesta will kill you in your sleep.” Cassian shrugged. “Nes and Feyre love Elain, and they will happily kill you if you dare break her heart. And Mother! I would help them do it!”
“God, I would never break her heart. I love her.” Azriel declared.
The two men stood in shock and a small gasp was heard from the closet. Rhysand’s brows flew to his hairline when he heard the gasp, he made his way across the room and opened the closet door to find Elain standing there.
Only in his shirt. 
“The fuck?” Cassian exclaimed as he took in Elain.
Azriel clenched his jaw, not because their secret was now out, more like he didn’t like the way their relationship was exposed. 
 “You love me?” Elain whispered as she climbed out of his closet and towards him. 
Azriel just nodded, he loved her. And Mother did he hope she loved him back. “I love you Elain, you have bewitched me body and soul, I love you.” He let out a shaky breath.
“Did he just quote pride and prejudice?” Rhysand whispered to Cassian, who nodded. 
Elain ran to Azriel, who pressed a kiss on his lips. “I love you too,” She smiled as a happy tear escaped her. “I love you, and I’m never gonna stop.” She mumbled.
Azriel wrapped his arms around her waist and pressed a kiss. It wasn’t a tender kiss, it was the type of kiss where she felt devoured. 
“That’s our cue to leave.” Cassian mumbled as he grabbed Rhysand’s wrist and dragged him out.
She let out a big laugh when they left. Azriel flashed Elain with a smile only she would have the privilege to see. Her heart melted as she looked at him and his big grin that rarely graced his face. 
“I love you, Az.” She hugged him. 
“Say it again.” 
“I love you, Azriel Knight.”
——————————————————————————
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authors note: I’m a big office fan, if you can’t tell already ;) hope you enjoyed reading this, and don’t forget to share, like, and give feedback!
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positivityfortoday · 3 years
Text
☀ PositivityForToday’s 10K Celebration ☀
There are SO many things worth living for and reasons to smile and be happy! With the help of my lovely followers/friends, I have compiled a list of 1,000 things that make people happy, for my 10,000 amazing followers! Hopefully, this list is able to help you, make you feel better, or give you a reason to smile today! 
☀ 1,000 Happy Things ☀
Seeing cows while driving
Moss on really old fallen trees 
Seeing a lil baby you don't know in public, and they smile at you!!!
Parents doing their kids hair or just people doing someone they care about’s hair
Really ragged old and well-loved stuffed animals 
When the dandelions start blooming
Spring blossom
Daffodils
Bluebells
Sharks
When you're sitting outside your house or something and people passing by wave and say hi
That feeling in the summer when you have your window open and you're listening to your favorite music
When someone does a hobby just because they enjoy it even if they aren't the best at it
Comfort shows and books
People speaking their native languages
When my brother gets something to eat and always gets me something he knows I like
When I finish a crossword 
When I see something that reminds me of someone I care about
Paintings
My best friend (I love her so much shhhh don't tell her)
My dog! I love him 
My little sisters! Adorable, creative, and very witty. I love them
Music! I get the happy shaky feelings and just,,, y e a h/listening to songs
Singing! Especially for band practice!
Sunlight beams in the morning
The moon
Eagles
That feeling when you’re with friends and you’re all laughing so loudly, and you just feel complete
Talking to my favorite people/talking to my best friend
Sunrises and sunsets
Seeing the stars
Cats
Butterflies/Moths
Snails
Warm sunshine
Purple gel pens
Hugs
My children
Sunny days
Beautiful views
Spending time with my family and friends
Playing badminton
Cycling
Playing with little kids
Playing with dogs
Whales
Animals doing daft things 
Talks and walks with my son 
Morning breakfast and coffee 
A good spicy lunch
Laying in my bed at night and just checking on current affairs and news
My boyfriend
My friends 
Art
Owls
Minecraft
Voice acting
Petting my dog
Smelling Flowers 
Feeling a cold thing when I’m warm or a warm thing when I’m cold 
Giving and getting kisses
Random texts from friends
Coffee flavored chocolate 
Singing
Moths with big white wings
Underdone scrambled eggs
A rainy night
Bubbles
That first warm day of spring
Going on hikes
Being outdoors
Candy
Chocolate 
The smell of playdoh 
Taking photos
Getting new clothing 
Candles
Birdwatching
Going on picnics
Writing poetry
Reading books
The holidays
Making people smile/laugh
Coffee
A nice warm blanket
Eating ice cream
Snow globes
Lightning bugs
Flowers after the snow melts
The smell of rain
Sitting on the steps early in the morning
Being the first to wake up
The feeling I get after running
The comfort of a favorite shirt
My girlfriend 
Family
Random acts of kindness
Babies
When I play with my dog by pretending to run at her and she goes crazy with excitement 
My cat 
Rain
Baking
Piano (playing or listening)
Small flowers
Flowy skirts/dresses
Wholesome romances
Hearing a song for the first time and loving it immediately 
Playing my flute
Horses
Listening to vinyls on a record player
When someone remembers a little detail about you
Painting my nails
Doing yoga
Doing exercise
Beating a personal record
Rainbows
Making crafts
Taking a shower after a long day
Going to the zoo
Going on vacation
Being at the beach or near water
Watching Netflix
Going to the movie theatre
Watching a live play at a theatre
Learning something new
Teaching someone how to do something 
Toasting marshmallows and eating S’mores 
Cupcakes
Seeing a shooting star
Taking a nap
When someone compliments me
Decorating my room
Picnics
My favorite band
My favorite celebrities
My favorite actors
Setting a new goal
Collecting rocks
Putting on fresh clean sheets
Seeing Christmas lights
Listening to birds chirping
Giraffes
Camping
Sitting by a bonfire
Eating mashed potatoes
Bullet journaling
Driving in the car with the windows down
Dancing
Looking at pretty pictures
Concerts
Funny jokes/puns/memes
Fireworks
Sparklers
Pretty clouds
My favorite shoes
Getting new art supplies
Making photo edits
Making gifts for my friends and family
Getting gifts from people 
Balloons
Succulents 
Playing an instrument
Drinking a nice cup of tea
Iced tea on a summer day
Eating fresh fruit
Getting my hair braided 
Eating at a restaurant 
Being on a boat
Swimming
Making new friends
Finding an animal in nature 
Pumpkins and pumpkin patches
Carving pumpkins 
Autumn and all the beautiful colors
Acting for theatre
Making video edits
Wearing a costume for Halloween
Dressing fancy
Finding four leaf clovers
Pressing flowers
Scrap booking
Handwritten letters
Stickers
Hummingbirds
Elephants
Eating breakfast 
Gardens
Inspirational quotes
Wearing my favorite necklace 
Baby animals 
Little streams and ponds
Foxes
Sun shining through trees
When it’s foggy out and you can see dew drops on plants and spider webs
Being on a swing
Finally accomplishing a goal you’ve been working on 
When a new season of your favorite show comes out
Doing my makeup
Cleaning and organizing 
Daydreaming 
Taking a bath
Christmas 
Watching funny videos
Wearing sweaters and hoodies
Fuzzy socks
Helping people 
Little figurines and objects
Popcorn 
Brownies
Looking out the window 
Wolves
Opening a window for fresh air
The smell of coffee 
Watching YouTube videos 
Getting a haircut 
Seeing a deer in the woods 
Watching birds fly
Finding shapes and objects in the clouds 
The smell of fresh laundry
When someone tells me something reminded them of me
Stepping on crunchy leaves
Animal crossing
My switch
Softball/baseball
Basketball
Soccer
Seeing cool cars/old cars
Rollerblading
Drawing with chalk on a sidewalk
Going to bed early
Stargazing
Making progress
Checking things off my to-do list
Taking Polaroid pictures
Going for walks
Jogging
Going to the library
Starting a new book
Finishing a good book
Playing board games
Koalas
Slippers
Big trees
Sunlight coming through the windows
Waking up on Christmas morning
Getting book, song, movie, etc. recommendations from my friends
Making music playlists
Finally receiving packages I ordered in the mail 
Baking desserts
When my favorite song comes on
When people make playlists for each other
Finding new characters to ship
Having free time
Sticky notes
Sunbathing
Traveling
Peace and quietness
Alone time
Meeting my step/exercise goal for the day
The people who love me
Soup
Coloring books
Getting into bed after a long day
Pillows
Fandoms
How unique and different everyone is
Getting a lot of work done
Looking forward to my future dream job
Playing video games
Being on Tumblr
Taking time for myself
Practicing self-care
Face masks
Finding money you forgot about
Holding hands
The smell of apple pie
Starting a new tv show
Getting letters in the mail
When the seasons change
Summer
Mugs and teacups
Smoothies
Breakfast food
Disney
Going into the woods/forest
Trying new creative outlets
The smell of sunscreen
Eating the food you’ve been craving
Knowing and feeling that people care
Telling a good story
Laughing so hard can’t stop and your stomach hurts
Late summer nights
Late night drives
Sparkles
Glitter
Listening to people I love talk about their favorite things and what they’re passionate about
Listening to podcasts
Turning up the volume of my music
Putting my headphones in
Blasting my favorite songs through my speaker
People accepting and supporting others for who they truly are
Wearing something cozy
Soft light
Love
Warm weather
A well-rested night
Waking up in the morning and feeling refreshed
Knowing that every day is a fresh start
Well written characters
A book I can get lost in
Sloths
My parents
My siblings
My grandparents
The feeling of sand beneath your feet
Heated blankets
Bagels
Toast
Getting something for free
Samples
Constellations 
Mason jars
Practicing a new skill
Finding a new hobby
Lazy weekends
Mac n cheese
French fries
Having deep conversations with my best friend
New jeans
Going to IKEA
Skirts 
Dresses
Doodling
When other people are happy (especially people I know and love)
Marching band
Sleeping in
Having the day off
Getting new books
Playing guitar
Playing ukulele 
Random compliments
A change of scenery
Cuddling
Waking before the sun is up
Reading old letters
Zebras
Exploring
Building Lego sets
Using photoshop to make edits
Journaling
Walking along the seafront and breathing in time with the waves
A good rom-com or nostalgic show
Writing lists
Pinterest boards
Looking back at my accomplishments
Talking on the phone with a friend or family member
Wrapping presents
A blue sky
Loving someone 
Waterfalls
Washi tape
Penguins
Donuts
The color yellow
Sleepovers
Cooking dinner
Kind gestures
Trust
Inside jokes
Songs that make you feel nostalgic
Seeing other people’s art
Comfy clothes
Wearing pajamas
Calligraphy
When someone calls you by your nickname
Going to Target
The first sunburn of the summer
Ramen noodles
Chinese food
Thrift shopping
Flower fields
Flowers growing in random places, like through a crack in the sidewalk
Writing
Sparkly snowflakes
When it snows on Christmas
Mixing paint colors together
Perfectly shaven legs
Puddles
The color red
Thunderstorms 
The smell of flowers
The ocean 
Adult sized onesies
Driving a golf cart
Fairytales
Cartoons
The color blue
Pasta
AO3
Crickets chirping
Seeing everyone’s houses decorated for the holidays, especially Christmas
Other people sharing what makes them happy
Monkeys
Being understood
When someone texts to make sure I got home safely
Iced coffee
Becoming better at communicating with others
Seeing a friend for the first time in a while
Good morning and good night texts
Drinking a cold glass of water
Deep conversations in the middle of the night
Collecting sea shells
Building blanket forts
Tan lines
Being under lots of blankets
Making better health and money choices
Getting chills from a song even after hearing it countless times 
Liking how I look
Hot chocolate
Finding new music
Buying cute things
Wearing an outfit I really like
When someone tells you how glad they are to be your friend
Gardening
Watching raindrops race down a window 
Trying new food
Finding exactly what I was looking for 
Planning my future
Finding a song that perfectly fits my mood or describes how I’m feeling
Writing little notes to people
When someone tells me I did something good
Eating ice cream on a hot day
Making friends with animals
Going to football games
Seeing people genuinely interested in something
Snow days
The last day of school
Winter break
Spring break
Thanksgiving
New Year’s Eve
Turtles
Sitting outside on a cool summer day
Watching rain
Watching the ocean waves come in
Netflix binges
A new movie release I really want to watch
Driving with a window down for the first time in the spring 
Taking a cruise
Giving helpful advice
Getting helpful advice
Doing a favor for someone who needs it
Someone referencing one of my fandoms or something I love out of no where
Learning and knowing stuff
Doing something physically challenging or scary
Listening to my bedroom fan while I fall asleep
Coming up with a new creative idea 
Finding something I wanted at the store on sale for a good deal
Finishing all my assignments on time or even early
Hugging my dog
Taking my dog for a walk
Teaching my dog a new trick
When strangers stop to say hi to my dog
Listening to audiobooks
The weekend
Finding a new flavor of chapstick
Drinking Kool-Aid, it makes me feel so nostalgic
Watching nature shows on a weekend morning
Watching cartoon shows on a Sunday morning
A good TV show, most likely something I've watched before because that way I know it ends well
A good, delicious comfort meal on a Friday night by myself 
A café in the city centre at noon when it's not filled with the morning rush or afternoon coffee breakers
The stars from my childhood bedroom because they're the brightest here
Listening to my favorite playlist really loud on a long road trip and singing to myself loudly in my car
Having an entire day to myself without interruptions from anyone
Opening the curtains first thing in the morning 
A new jacket
Going to the cinema on a first release day because it's always super exciting and full of people anxious to see a movie they've been waiting for forever
Listening to live music
Riding roller coasters
Going to amusement parks
Lizards
Seahorses
Starfish
Eating fair food
Feeling an instrument vibrate when you’re playing it
Hearing my dog snore
When my dog dreams in his sleep 
Wearing a new piece of clothing for the first time
Feeling the sun on you
Eyes in the sunlight
Seeing city lights
Singing in the shower at the top of my lungs
Looking at someone and them knowing exactly what they’re going to say
Laughing till you cry
Being under a blanket
Going to craft stores
Watching boats
The idea of traveling the world
When my dogs let me lay my head on them
Listening to an old song and having it bring back memories
Candy corn
Crazy socks
Quotes
Fall and the leaves changing color and the crisp feeling in the air
Making snowmen
Making gingerbread houses for Christmas
Making videos with family
Burning a candle
Booping a dog’s nose
Getting letters/notes from people; writing them
Snow globes
Dr. Pepper
Doc martens
Fortune cookies
Potatoes
Easter
Finishing something
Skipping rocks
Warm rain
When someone opens up to you
Finding the right words to say exactly what you wanted
Animal footprints
Eating outside
Fairy lights
The smell of a hotel
Windows
Meeting a new dog
Dolphins
Getting magazines in the mail
Being in the woods as the sun starts to rise and the animals wake up
Warm days
Adirondack chairs
A warm breeze
Clothes and blankets hanging outside to dry
Feeding birds
Aquariums
The color green
Tie dying things
Going to art museums
Going to science museums
New albums from my favorite artists 
Seeing moss in nature
Finding cute little mushrooms 
When a dog wags its tail a bunch and is excited to see me
Playing fetch with my dog
Obsessing over something and having someone to talk about it with
Going on a walk with my best friend and talking about life
Looking at old pictures and reminiscing on good memories
Reading a book that's so good your brain wants to read faster than it can
Laughing with friends about the weirdest things
Being appreciated for doing small things you wouldn't even have thought about yourself because it's something you *just do*
Being creative
Watching animals
A story I can't put down
Stretching
The moment when you listen to a new song/album by your favourite artist
When you're at a concert and anticipating the moment before the band comes out
When at a concert and they play your favourite song live
The moment when someone compliments your outfit 
When you see someone wearing merch of something you like 
Seeing the sunrise/sunset 
Watching the sun rise out of the water or sink down into it as it’s setting
This ecstatic feeling in general when you're just living in the moment with people who love something as much as you do
Hugging my cat and smelling his fur
Listening to my music by myself and singing to it 
Making edits I’m really proud of 
Losing hours in a good book or fanfiction
Writing sentences that I actually like 
My siblings and my parents when they're being chill and funny
Watching my favorite tv shows and movies and yelling about them into the void 
Finding a new good song 
Fresh out of the shower + fresh clean sheets feeling when you go to bed
When I come downstairs in the morning and my dog greets me right at the bottom step with her lil’ tail wagging
Knowing that if I ever needed someone to chat with, someone would be there to lend an ear
Tigers
Lions
When you shuffle your music and the exact song you want to hear plays
When all my family is around the outdoor fire on a summer’s evening
When my nieces and nephews give me squishy kid hugs
Being home alone and being able to cook or bake in the kitchen without disruption
Driving around with a friend in the evenings and just belting our favorite songs
Seaside walks
Disney World
Seeing live theatre
The sun shining on leaves and stone buildings
Dancing when I'm alone
Color-coordinating my outfit
Floating on my back in the sea
The smell of summer nights
The smell of winter mornings
Colorful things/environments
Bunnies
Walking along lakes/rivers/the sea
Spending time in nature
Taking care of my plants
Giving affection to my loved ones
Listening to other people's stories
Reading about people I've never met before or places I've never visited before (especially if they are now just a part of history)
Embroidering
Pandas
Swimming in a river or the sea
Stargazing (my favorite moments usually happen an hour before sunrise)
White-caged-bird
Feeling the breeze when I spin and my heartbeat when I dance for an hour at a time
All the wonderful smells of flowers and colours that nature has to offer
Sharing good laughter with someone
Feeling like I belong
Travelling and discovering new customs of different cultures
Hiking or foraging
That feeling when I'm approaching the end of a really good book and I let myself be engulfed by the fact that it's a unique experience, that I'll never experience as the first time again
Observing my local fauna
Petting and taking care of an animal (double the joy if it is friendly with strangers)
Drinking a good cup of honey tea
Finding a perfume that suits me
Eating something sweet
Enjoying a meal with others
Cat paws tapping on the floor
Dipping a biscuit into tea
Trying to catch leaves falling from the tree
Having sunlight hit your face when you’re napping
Objects that cast a rainbow when the sun shines through them
Seeing patterned shadows
Ambient mood lighting
Sleeping
Wearing jewelry 
Cheese
Playing chess
Fresh air
Going somewhere new
My Mom’s cooking
Being inspired
When someone holding your hand rubs their thumb lovingly in circles
Picking strawberries
Otters
Painting the walls of my room
Wind chimes
Seeing that your favorite people are active online
Finally understanding something you were struggling with
The excitement you get when someone reblogs your writing or art
Getting a new notebook or journal
Appreciation
Validation
When someone tells you they love you and mean it
The smell of freshly baked bread
When my dog falls asleep on me
Making new online friends
Found family
Finishing cleaning my room
When someone lays their head on your shoulder
Doing something right on the first try
Finally sitting down after standing for a long time
Getting goosebumps from hearing or seeing something you love
Seeing a gorgeous view
Loving someone and them loving you back
Freshly baked gooey cookies
When a song comes on and everyone starts singing
When I’m out for a run and it’s hot and it starts raining. Nothing makes me feel more like a human than getting caught in the rain on a run
Swimming in the ocean
When people are talking about something they really love and get carried away trying to explain it all to you
Puppies
Being in the middle of nowhere and actually getting to see the whole sky of stars that you never get to see in a city
Finding people that love the same things you do
 When something silly reminds you of someone you love; like every time I see an orange and green gummy worm I think of my sister
When you’re hugging someone and they squeeze you a little bit before they let go
Weather where you can leave all the windows open in your house
Trampolines
Driving with no destination in mind
Falling asleep to the sound of rain
Hearing other people laugh
Laughing only because you hear someone else laugh and it's just so contagious
The first snowfall of the year
Disney movies
Listening to someone tell stories and they have like 15 side stories in between the main one
Romantic movies
Bubble baths
Smiling between kisses
Wearing sweatpants
A clean house
Pizza
My computer
Cheesy pickup lines
When people tell me they miss me
Cool spring mornings after a storm
My job
Butterflies
New shoes
Oversized shoes
Caramel apples
Volunteering
Meditating
Running my blog
Finding sea glass at the beach
Getting my nails done 
Planning vacation
Hot cider
Telling people I love them
Writing in my gratitude journal
Eating homegrown vegetables, fruit, and herbs
Remembering a good dream I had
Happy endings
Colored pens
Decorating for the holidays
Finishing a really good tv show
Leopards
Summer rain
Thunderstorms where I can just open my window to the full extent and just watch and listen
Calls with my best friend
Seeing a meme and sending it to my friends
Getting an email from AO3
That moment when you get an idea for creating something
Walking barefoot on the grass
Sending thank you notes
Writing events I’m looking forward to on my calendar
Dippin' Dots
Spicy food
Seeing a full moon
Eating cookie dough
Eating seasonal food
Bubble wrap
Going to the car wash and getting rainbow soap
Dark chocolate
Soft blankets
Weighted blankets
Soft drinks with crushed ice
When I get an unexpected phone call from someone I love
Wearing flip flops
Longer daylight hours
Having a BBQ
Frosting cookies
Making cupcakes in the microwave
Watching the Hallmark channel during the holidays
Taking selfies or photos with people I love
Putting on lotion
The smell of a baby’s head
The Office
Online shopping
The smell of freshly cut grass
Surprising my family or friends
Looking at the clock when it’s 11:11
Being productive
Quilts
Doing good on an exam
Someone doing a favor for me (especially when I didn’t ask)
Eating pancakes with syrup
Origami
Sprinkles
Confetti
Waving at people
Giving high fives
Complicated Handshakes between you and your best friend
Naps/feeling well-rested
Eating one of my favorite foods
Hearing good news from/about a friend or family member
Looking at nature (these days it's seeing squirrels in my neighbour's garden and looking at my plants and trees)
When make someone happy or feel like I made a difference (including a satisfied client)
Success (good grades, a gifset that does well)
Hugs from my mom
Learning new things
Chatting with my friends because they’re all amazing people
Group watches of my favorite tv show or movie
That feeling when the house has just been cleaned/when I’m freshly showered
Making jokes/laughing with people
Reading fluffy fanfics
Driving on the road to a destination far away, I love the trip as much as (if not more than) arriving at the actual place
Reading affirmations
Green tea
Getting breakfast or lunch from a nice restaurant 
Learning about topics that won’t benefit me; like Chinese history, geography, ancient flora and fauna, etc. just things that I find cool 
The jokes my girlfriend makes, especially when they’re the same ones she always makes
Stories from the past! Stories from history from people who actually lived through it
Stories in general, just hearing the life experiences of people in completely different positions from me. I love hearing people’s stories
Drawing intricate things, like old buildings, landscapes, and plants
Cooking a nice meal
Grocery shopping and farmers markets especially 
My cat! All of her weird little habits too, like how she stands in front of my feet so I’ll push her where she wants to go 
Botanical gardens
State parks
Museums
Art galleries
Listening to stories my grandparents tell
When people tell me about their life goals and dreams
Being surrounded by the people I love 
Living the best life I can
Partying hard the night away
Daydreaming
Sunflowers always make me smile
Warm tea
Big fluffy clouds in a blue sky
Friendly babies
Hearing a past favorite song
Singing karaoke 
Biking riding
Helping others
Chocolate milk
Sweets and fruits
Having fun doing things I love
Dragons
Video games
My favorite things
Writing
Affection
Exercising
Being on Tumblr
Pinterest
Looking at flowers and plants
Playing with my cats
Chatting with my friends (at the moment it’s through zoom, of course)
Finding new ways to decorate my room
Window shopping
Spending time with my boyfriend
Wearing my favorite outfit/accessory
Eating something delicious
The cool side of my pillow 
Tears of joy
Woodpeckers
Reading poems
Hugging trees
Tree houses
Airstreams/campers
Playing frisbee
Making sculptures
Puppy ears
The first day of spring
The first day of summer
Sending silly photos to my friends
Building sand castles
Winning prizes at the fair or arcade
Marbles
Cacti
Scrolling through my phone
Writing fanfiction
Seeing someone you haven't seen for a really long time
Putting together collages
Printing out photos I love
DIY projects
Sewing 
Crocheting 
Listening to steel drums
Haunted houses
Going through a corn maze
Picking fresh fruit or vegetables
Bubble tea
Starbucks
Dunkin donuts
Disneyland
Disney Princesses
Climbing trees
Finishing errands
Rewatching my favorite episodes
Scrunchies
Milkshakes
Ice cream blizzards
Listening to acoustic versions of songs
Hot tubs
Rubber ducks
Coconut flavored food
Dipping fries in ice cream
Discovering a new type of animal
Seeing hot air balloons
Frogs/toads
Splashing in puddles 
Having plants inside my house
Teddy bears
Iridescent/holographic things
Bird houses
Breakfast in bed
Crystals/gemstones
Ziplining 
Dew drops
Glow sticks
Flower crowns (especially handmade ones)
Spring rain 
Watching other people make art
Lighthouses
Finding heart shaped things in nature
Thinking of getting my own apartment
Coming up with a new recipe for food
Cookbook recipes passed down through families
Bookshelves
Making pretty yogurt bowls
Seaside houses
Flying on planes and being in/above the clouds
Flower bouquets
Looking at and learning about the planets
Fruit snacks
Palm trees
Weeping willow trees
Cherry blossoms
Eating cake
Decorating cakes with eccentric icing designs and colors
Whipped cream
Having snowball fights
Hearing Christmas music
Tattoos
Wearing rings
Green grass
A tidy organized desk with cute desk supplies
My craft room
Hammocks
Little cottages
Cotton candy (and cotton candy flavored things)
Looking at all the paint pallet colors in paint stores
Stamps
Taking silly photos in photobooths
Going to the mall
Making jam, especially strawberry jam
Reading outside
Finding a bird nest and watching eggs hatch
Looking at photos of my family and friends 
Finding old flora and art books
Eating fresh corn on the cob with butter on a summer day
Lily Pads
Icicles
Inner peace
Sitting under a tree
Not having to turn on the light in your room when the sun is shining through
When restaurants have patios you can dine at
Fishing on a pier
Seeing old couples in public
Making gifs
Trees swaying in the wind
Anime
Dying Easter eggs
Laying in the trunk of a car and watching the clouds or stars
Night lights
Flower shops 
Outer space
Kitchens
PB&J sandwiches
Toasted Cheese
LoFi music
Listening to/watching ambience videos
Turtle necks
Peaches
Looking at old maps
Figurines of the earth/globe
Honey and bees
Cheesecake
Seeing footprints in sand and watching them be washed away by waves
Anything related to the moon, stars, and sun
Reading my horoscope (even if I know it’s not real)
Archways decorated with hanging flowers
Yogurt
Pudding
Knowing that I’m not alone
Ancient roman sculptures
Macarons
When someone tells me they care about me
Weddings
Watercolour
Birthday parties 
My brother
My sister
When my dog leaves his bed to lay in the sunlight
Doing mini photoshoots with my friends
Hand making bracelets/necklaces (friendship bracelets)
When someone calls me darling or honey
Love letters
Game night
Skateboarding
Stress balls and squishy toys
Starting something I’ve been wanting to do for a long time
Playing cards
Doing puzzles
Word searches
Kittens
Ordering takeout
Stepping out into the fresh air
Creating vision boards
Getting a massage
Writing positive affirmations
Lunch dates
Standup comedy
Listening to classical music
Nature/animal documentaries
Having someone there to listen to me
Listening to someone when they need it
Accepting myself for who I am
Looking back and seeing how far I’ve come and all the progress I've made
Doing something my future self will be thankful for
Speaking up for myself
Being near loved ones
Finding time for my hobbies
Giving myself time to rest
Saturday mornings
Marrying the one I love
Discovering new things
Going to new cities
My idols
Pastries
Feeling the wind on my face on a car ride
The sensation of music in my ears and like nothing else matters
People who have my best interest in mind
Simplicity
Fulfilling my dreams
Discovering a new ice cream flavor
Knitting
Making myself a priority
Knowing that I am important, and I matter
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Thank you all so much for following me and supporting my blog! It means a TON! I never expected for this blog to become popular, especially because I originally started it to help myself get through some mental health issues. I am so happy to be able to share my journey of healing with you all! It means the world to me to help or make a positive impact on even just one person’s life! Each and every single one of you is amazing!! You matter and you are SO important! Thanks again for your everything! Have a great day!!! Sending sunshine your way!! 
156 notes · View notes
nashibirne · 3 years
Text
Gimme Shelter - 2
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Ready for chapter 2? Here it is. This whole fic, but especially this part, was inspired by this article/interview. Men's Journal Article In particular by Henry's statements about his time at boarding school.
In this chapter we learn about Henry's and Kat's past. I hope you enjoy it. If so, please leave me a comment, like or replog. 💜
Previous part -> Nashi's Masterlist
Pairing: Henry Cavill x OFC (Kat Spencer)
Words: ~3.4k
Summary: Henry has to deal with a personal crisis and he finds shelter with his old rugby mate Sam and his sister Kat. She used to be Henry’s best friend a very long time ago. Will they be able to become friends again or maybe even more? Chapter 2: Kat remembers the day Henry hurt her very much and they have the unavoidable conversation about it.
Warnings: RPF, mention of bullying, angst, humiliation
No beta! All mistakes are mine. English is not my mother tongue so expect bad grammar and wrong spelling.
Disclaimer: I don’t know the real Henry Cavill, this is pure fiction and nothing more
Credits: Pics for the moodboard from Pinterest. Faceclaims: Kat = Jennifer Connelly
Taglist (please let me know if you want to be added or removed)
@lunedelorient @inlovewithhisblueeyes @willkatfanfromasia @hell1129-blog @mis-lil-red @agniavateira @kebabgirl67 @omgkatinka @legendarywizarddetective @summersong69 @taebfada @xxxkatxo @madbaddic7ed @artandotherdelights @sweetlybigdragonn @notabronte @littlefreya @luclittlepond @eldarwen333 @meowpurrbooks @marantha @rn7rocks
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
2
"And I say I'll never hurt her
But she knows it isn't true
'Cause although I never told her
I think she knows 'bout me and you."
From "When Susannah Cries", written by Amund Bjorklund/Espen Lind
****
Kat found herself confronted with Henry all alone after a week of avoiding him. Of course they had met when they had dinner together in the evenings but she had stayed out of Sam's and Henry's conversations most of the time and during the day she stayed in her office, busy with work. Sometimes she secretly watched him, peeking out of her window, when he played with Kal in the garden or when he was doing workouts or stretching when he came back from one of his runs, but she avoided meeting him.
She knew it was idiotic but she just couldn't forget their past. She felt childish and silly and of course it was unavoidable to talk about it at some point but she wasn't ready yet. On this Friday morning she was sitting in the kitchen having breakfast when he came back from his morning run unusually late.
"Morning, Kat." He flashed her a bright smile before he started to make a protein shake and an egg sandwich. He looked fantastic even when he was sweaty and worn out.
"Good morning." She avoided his gaze and concentrated on her porridge. 
"Mind if I join you?" Henry pointed at the chair opposite of her.
"No. Please, sit." Kat gave him an awkward smile. It still felt so strange to have him around, it made her uncomfortable and tense.
"I already said this to Sam, the house is beautiful. I mean it always was, I remember it very well but what you made of it is great. Modern and traditional at the same time, perfect mixture." 
"Thank you." She didn't know what else to say but Henry didn't seem to mind her taciturn reply, he kept on smiling and talking.
"I was pretty surprised when I heard that you moved here. I mean, you were always a big city girl, you hated Stowe, and then...St. Ives...not only for holidays but for good…" 
"Yeah. At some point I was getting sick of the big city lights, of all the hectic and the noise and all the crowded places." Kat explained shrugging. "And when our parents thought about selling the house after their divorce, Sam and I decided to buy and renovate it. He was looking for a place to open a practise anyway and the old vet in town was giving up his, so it was the perfect opportunity for him and I can work from anywhere so we moved here."
"Right, Sam mentioned you're an editor."
"Yes. I have a little editing office and work as a freelancer for different publishing houses."
"That's great, Kat. You've always been good with words."
She smiled and this time it was more relaxed. "And you've always been a good entertainer."
Henry chuckled. "Most of the time you found my little performances annoying. I remember that very well."
Kat laughed. "You're right. When you tried your stand up comedy on me. That was a pain in the ass. But you were great on stage. You were a natural."
"We were a great team, all of our drama group."
"That's true but you were outstanding in Grease. Everyone said that. I remember our parents were gushing over your performance all night after the premiere." She laughed again and rolled her eyes. 
"That must have sucked. Didn't your mother want to make you join the drama group too?" "Yes. And she hated that I preferred to write for the school newspaper. She thought I was wasting my creative potential."
"She was wrong. Your articles always were the most progressive, interesting and polarizing ones."
"Yeah, maybe. But she was right when she said you were extraordinarily talented. You're a great actor."
"Thanks, Kitty."
Her smile froze. Kitty. He was the only one who'd ever called her that. And he stopped doing it 22 years ago.
"I'm sorry, Kat. I don't know where that came from." He said with a remorseful frown.
"Just don't call me that ever again."
"Of course not. Unless you ask me to." He gave her a sheepish smile.
She shook her head, visibly annoyed. "Not gonna happen."
"Kat. Please, I'm really sorry and I know I lost every right to call you that a very long time ago but maybe we can start over again. Talk about what happened. I never got the chance to explain…"
"Don't even start, okay? I don't wanna hear it." She interrupted him mid-sentence and started to stir her coffee so angrily that she spilled half of it on the table.
Henry began to chew on his bottom lip. "It's just that my therapist told me to follow through my past, to take a close look at the mistakes I've made...to learn from them."
"My, my...too bad my therapist told me the exact opposite. Let the past die. Kill it if you have to. That's what he said."
Kat shrugged apologetically.
"That's not something a therapist would say, Kat. This is from Star Wars The Last Jedi. Ben Solo said this to Rey."
He knew the quote. Still a nerd, Kat thought. Still that damn cute dork.
"Never underestimate the wisdom of a Star Wars character." 
"Ok, I get it. You don't wanna talk about it." Henry raised his hands in surrender.
"You catch on quick, don't you?" Kat said sarcastically.
Henry shook his head, rolling his eyes with an annoyed snort.
"Alright, let's keep it under the cloak of silence." 
"Yup."
"Fine."
"Fine."
Kat crossed her arms and stared out of the window. Henry was fuming with anger. Why wouldn't she let him explain? Make a fresh start? They were 16 back then, stupid teenagers, why wasn't it possible to talk about this damn night now, 22 bloody years later? He bolted down his sandwich and his shake and left the room without another word.
****
Kat went upstairs after this unpleasant encounter and plopped down on her bed with a desperate sigh. She remembered that damn night so fucking well. Still. After all these years. It was burnt into her memory as the biggest humiliation of her life. The day her heart broke in a way, no man had ever been able to repair it. Superficially maybe but not to the core. That stupid summer dance. Kat closed her eyes and suddenly she was sixteen again.
I really don't know why I'm already wearing that silly dress three hours before I have to go, I didn't want to have it at all. At least not before Henry suggested going to the dance with me. As friends of course but nevertheless. It will be the two of us together. You and me, Kitty. Two lonely hearts. That's what Henry said to me. That was four weeks ago and ever since that day it's all I can think about. I look at my reflection in the mirror and I like what I see. The dress is cute, it's light blue and quite romantic with all the frills and the puffed sleeves and I feel like an Edwardian lady from one of the novels Henry and I love so much. I feel pretty and I want to be pretty for him. I want to look like a girl tonight, not like a tomboy. I even bought a headband with little flowers. I'd really love to hear Amy's opinion on my dress. She's my roommate and friend but she's at the hospital because she had an appendix operation. 
The ringing of the phone in our room startles me. I take the call. It's Henry and he sounds awful. He says he has a very bad migraine and that he cannot go to the dance with me. He apologizes several times but of course it's not his fault. I know he has these attacks from time to time and I know he can't leave his bed when he does. He needs to sleep in complete silence and darkness and tomorrow he will be fine again. He tells me he wants me to go alone, to have fun tonight but of course I'm not going anywhere without him and he knows it. It's a shame, that's true but where's the point in going to a dance alone without my only friends, without Amy, without Henry.
I take off my dress and put on jeans and a hoodie. I look out of the window, the weather is wonderful and I decide to take a walk to distract myself from the disappointment.
Of course I run right into my big brother Samuel. He asks me what I'm doing in the park. Why I'm not getting ready for the big party and for my date. He just can't stop making fun of me. He knows it's not a date, that Henry and I are just friends but he loves to tease me. He says I'm in love with Henry and of course he's right, I am in love with him, deeply, I'm in love for the first time in my life but I keep on denying it. Sam must never know that he's right because he would use it against me, that's for sure. When I tell him about Henry and the migraine he says I can't skip the dance, that I really need some fun and that I'm going to like it. He convinces me to go with him. His date has dumped him because he cheated on her. He's a notorious heartbreaker but deep inside he is a nice guy and -all in all- a pretty good big brother. I hesitate but then I think of the beautiful dress that's waiting for me in my room and so I finally agree.
I go to Henry's room to tell him I'm going with Sam and to explain why. I don't want him to be upset that I go without him. I knock but there's no answer. I guess he sleeps and I don't want to wake him up and so I leave.
Sam picks me up at nine. The dance starts at eight but he wants a big entrance. It's all about attention and drama, Kat, he says and I guess he's right.
When we arrive at the party Sam soon disappears with Molly Smith, one of his many exes and I stand alone beside the cold buffet. That's when I see him. At first I don't believe my eyes but it's really him. It's Henry. He's standing there with all the popular kids, chatting and laughing and holding hands with Poppy Edwards, the most beautiful girl of our school. No sign of a bad migraine. I feel like I'm going to pass out. I can't look away, I want to but I just can't turn my eyes away from him. When he notices me his face falls. He stares at me and so does everyone who's standing there with him. My first impulse is to turn around and run away but I don't. My pride is stronger than the stinging pain in my heart. He obviously doesn't want me to be here. To see him with his new friends and his date or girlfriend or whatever this is. I jut my chin defiantly and stand my ground. I watch in horror how Poppy takes Henry by the hand and drags him in my direction. Their friends follow them.
She greets me with a smile that's sweet as sugar but the words that come out of her mouth are like poison. "Katherine, what a pretty dress. Where did you get it?" Before I'm able to stammer an answer she keeps going. "Did you find it in the prop room of the drama group? You look like Eliza Doolittle." She gives me a fake smile and her stupid friends start to giggle. I know my face is flaming red with anger, embarrassment and humiliation but Poppy's not done with me yet. She turns to Henry. "I bet she wants you to be her Professor Higgins. Everybody knows she has a crush on you. Maybe she wants to kiss you. Do you want to kiss this dressed up tomboy, Henry? Or do you want to kiss me?" Now every single one of them bursts out laughing and it feels like a punch in the guts. I'm on the brink of tears. I look at Henry, searching for help, but there's no reaction. He doesn't speak up against them, does nothing to defend and protect me, he doesn't even look at me.  He doesn't do anything, he just stands there staring holes in the ground, avoiding my gaze. I can't stand this anymore. Him. Her. All of them. I turn around and leave fully aware of the fact that this moment marks the end of our friendship.
When Kat woke up from that ghastly memory she felt just as terrible as 22 years ago. Humiliated and ashamed and angry. Very angry. She got up with a jolt, ran up the stairs to the second floor and headed right to Henry's rooms. She didn't knock, just stormed in, finding him standing there in only a pair of briefs. His curls were wet and he smelled heavenly. She stopped in her tracks and Henry stared at her. "Kat. What the fuck. Ever heard of privacy? Ever heard of knocking?"
She didn't answer, she just stood there unsure what to do or say. Henry put on a shirt and sweatpants and turned to her again. "Can I help you?"
"Explain." Kat said. "Explain to me what happened at the dance."
"Now?"
"Yes. Now. Is that a problem?"
He shook his head slowly. "Not at all. Wanna sit?" 
"No. I'm fine."
"Come on, Kat. This may take a while."
With a sigh she sat down on the sofa while Henry plopped down in the arm chair beside the window.
"So?" Kat looked at him expectantly.
"Well, first of all I wanna say I was a stupid wank back then. I lied to you and I let you down. I know this now, I knew it then, but when Poppy asked me to go to the dance with her…"
"When?"
"What?"
"When did she ask you?"
"A week before the ball."
Kat nodded. "Okay. Go on."
"Right. When Poppy asked me I just couldn't say no. I mean she was the most popular girl in our school and she wanted to go with a nobody like me. With fat Cavill, the lemon. Her attention just felt so good. The thought that she might be interested in me...it was too tempting to not give it a try. I just couldn't refuse her. I faked that migraine because I thought it was the easiest way to keep you away from the dance. I was sure you'd never go without me but I was wrong. I considered telling you the truth, I really did because I hated lying to you, Kat, but I finally decided to keep it a secret because I was sure you would try to talk me out of it. I knew you hated Poppy..."
"Yes, I did. She was a bitch. A manipulative, arrogant bitch and a bully."
"Like Aaron Taylor you mean?" Henry snapped at her with an angry glance. After all these years he was still jealous of the guy. "Aaron was arrogant, yes, but he was never manipulating anyone. He was more honest and true to himself than every single one of you and your friends. And for sure he was no bully. I wouldn't have been with him if he'd bullied anyone. He was a good guy." 
"Poppy wasn't that bad either. The real Poppy I mean. Not the queen bee she pretended to be."
Kat turned her eyes towards the ceiling and shook her head in disbelief. "Yeah, sure. She was an angel…You know, that was the hardest part. To process that you of all people were with a girl like her. She and her friends made fun of us and our love for literature so many times." Her voice got tense and she took a deep breath to calm down.  Henry sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose before he continued to speak.
"Anyway. I never wanted to hurt you, Kat. I hope you know that. I didn't expect you to show up and I know the way I treated you was awful. I didn't defend you, I hurt your feelings, I betrayed you and behaved like an asshole. I know this is almost inexcusable but I want you to know that I'm really sorry. I was back then but I didn't dare to tell you. And I still am. I'm sorry and ashamed of my behaviour. I can only apologize and hope for forgiveness." He avoided her gaze, staring at his hands.
A long silent pause followed his statement but after a while Kat inhaled deeply and after clearing her throat she started to talk. "Thank you, Henry. This really means a lot to me. I mean, hearing you admit all that. And the betrayal, that's what hurt the most. I want you to know that it was never about the fact that you didn't return my feelings for you. I mean, of course I was jealous of Poppy, but…"
Now Henry was the one to cut in.
"Wait. Your feelings for me?" He sounded genuinely surprised.
"Come on, don't act stupid. You must have known how I felt about you. I was pretty obvious and Poppy told everyone at the dance that I had a crush on you." Kat knew she was blushing but it was embarrassing to say that out loud.
"Kat, I swear I had no idea. I thought Poppy was just joking. I never considered you'd see me this way." He looked her right in the eyes before he continued. "You told me that you don't see me as a boy. That I was -and that's a quote I will never be able to forget- 'just like a girl that has a teeny wiener' to you."
"Oh god, Henry. I was 13 when I said that and I was a brat with a loose tongue. I did see you as a boy when we got older. Of course I did…" Kat gave him an awkward smile.
"So you really had a crush on me? Why didn't you say anything?" 
"To be honest it was a little more than a crush. I was in love with you. And when you said you'd go to the dance with me I thought that maybe there we would dance and get close and maybe share a special moment and a kiss or...I don't know. I just had these silly romantic fantasies…" Kat swallowed hard and shrugged. 
"You hoped that we'd become a couple that night."
She nodded.
"I never knew this, Kat." Henry felt awful. If he'd only known, he would never have said yes to Poppy if he'd had the slightest notion that Kat was in love with him.
"Well, it doesn't matter anymore, does it. That was 22 years ago. I'm not that girl anymore and you most definitely aren't that boy."
Kat got up and clapped her hands.
"I guess it's a good thing we've talked this through. Your therapist is going to like it." She gave him a sarcastic smile and Henry got up too. He came closer but Kat took a step back and so he didn't move any further.
"Do you think you can forgive me?"
"I already have, Henry. I know you didn't do it on purpose or to hurt me. We were so young and now as an adult I somehow unterstand why you acted that way...but that's not the point. The problem is to forget and to trust you again."
He nodded slowly. "I understand that, Kat. Just give me a second chance, okay?"
She took a deep breath. "I'll try to. But I need time. Time to get used to you, to the whole situation."
"Sure." And then he pulled her into a hug that felt right and wrong at the same time and left her dizzy and with a racing heart. "I won't let you down again, Kat." Oh how she wished she could believe his whispered words.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
tbc
91 notes · View notes
soranihimawari · 2 years
Text
Art Novuex & the Jackal
Snapdragon flowers & meanings
AKA: Sakusa learns a lesson with the help of one electrical engineer (with two cool hobbies). Also Inspired by a slight bc where Sakusa learns sign when he doesn’t wanna talk as much.
Sakusa x (f)pronoun reader
Word Count: tba
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^ what the reder’s dress rehearsal costume looks like^
The MSBY Black Jackals along with other V. League teams were invited to a private dinner with corporate sponsors and the JVA one autumnal evening. The big wigs on the executive board wanted a formal dinner party to be arranged during this time of year to congratulate all teams on signing their newest players while also sending off those who wanted to retire (whether players or coaches or other personnel staffers) after the next season. This is a very big deal and a black tie affair, according to the e-mail invitation the rambunctious team receives a month and a half ago.
The captain of the Jackals reminded everyone today’s practice would just be a debriefing one as to who is who for the JVA and other members to note since this would also be a good time to gain some corporate sponsors. Funnily enough, Meian knew his teammates, especially the younger ones, don’t recognize faces (or names) very well, so he brought in a member of the audio visual club to hook up a slideshow presentation he made. Your phone rang at all odd hours of the morning when you realize it was probably the captain trying to make you come in because one of the wires of the score board caused it to break. You make a joke saying he needs to get better at aiming his serves into the stands and Meian sighs saying it’s not that kind of call. (And it was a one time thing his starting setter did).
“Whatever, Shukun, I’ll be there…yeah yeah, seven thirty the latest.”
You grab your pillow from the couch you happily slept on in your living room and let out a muffled scream. You loved the team you worked on, you really did, but sometimes the athletes themselves terrified you. You’ve sat in on practices before assisting your work-senpais with fixing the wiring for the AWAY side of the board; you thought volleyball was a safe sport. Kind of like ring toss you played in elementary school, so it’s a simple game really. However, you were always interested in the technical sides of sports anyways. The game mechanics you read up on after officially being signed on for the V League team made you a viable candidate fresh out of your graduate program.
This favor was asked of you two weeks ago before you had any sort of plans made with your group of friends from college. You were pulled to the side by the captain and head coach one afternoon in the middle of break, to ask if you can come in early a week before the sponsored dinner.
“Why?” You seemed perplexed, pushing you glasses up your nose. Your bun was a bit messy, and your faded jeans folded up with the cuffs; your audio visual embroidered shirt gained some noticeable wrinkles when you fold your arms over your chest.
“If this is about doing a sound check in the morning, sure. If not, I’m sure it can wait until after that fancy dinner,” you make air quotes with your fingers. “Unless…”
You watch the captain look over his shoulder when his teammates were roughhousing just a bit before break was over. Then, you realize, as he was scolding the team, more so Miya and Bokuto for starting the match between themselves and Sakusa and Hinata. It dawns on you those four don’t have a damn clue who the executives were for the JVA and more or less how to secure a sponsorship for the team. You rub your temples with your fingers before you cave after the coach gives you the incentive of adding you as his plus one since his daughter was out of town visiting his sister-in-law for the school break this term. The coach smiles because apparently with you being his arm candy for an evening would make sure the newly signed trouble-squad would actually act professional (as hard as it may seem to you).
So this is how you’re about to welcome a free dinner in a swank art museum surrounded by the worlds most eligible bachelors in the volleyball world. Meian conducts his team meeting as you bursts through the gym doors breathing heavily. You had your hands to your knees as you catch your breath, holding out the flash drive of the presentation to Meian who asked if you were alright.
“Y-yeah,” you said. Sarcasm was part of your charm, which made you more favorable to the likes of Sakusa. “Haven’t ran a marathon in five years, but the PDQ-lines boy my house was out of commission and I was already running late anyway.”
“Cross country, you?” Meian asked perplexed. You didn’t miss the way the other members of the team would gawk at you when you’d wear any sort of form fitting professional outfits, which is why your attire in your locker were loose-fitting athleisure separates besides the oversized sweater you received from your secret gift exchange in your department. You almost punch the captain in the arm. Almost.
“Is that so hard to believe?” You ask back perplexed but the audacity of his tone.
“No,” he easily defends. “Just didn’t think you’d be part of any team sports. OK. That sounded bad.”
Rolling your eyes, you hold up a hand to further stop the captain from embarrassing himself considering the team chuckles behind him.
“How come you never said you ran cross country?” He asks instead choosing his words carefully as he walks with you to the benches.
“Meh. You never asked, so I didn’t feel the need to disclose that I ran,” you shrug. “You should really start that slideshow now bossman.”
Following up with a thankful smile when he went back to the team huddle. You took a seat on the bench at court-side, watching the presentation with the images of the executives confirmed attending the dinner. In the interim of going from the head of the JVA to the individual backers for their own team, a hand with a spare bottle of blue Gatorade. You could tell by the beauty mark close to the person’s wrist is a dead giveaway as to the bottle belongs too.
“Thank you,” you say in a low voice, taking the bottle in your own hands after you pull out a face towel from your hoodie pocket to dab your hands clean first, as you begin to drink the electrolyte infused liquid. Sakusa hums a soft, “you’re welcome,” and you almost choke on your next sip.
“He speaks,” your teasing tone makes you notice the way his eyes seem to crinkle under the extra filter portion of his team themed mask. His silhouette and shadow elongates the floorboards when he returns to his self-designated seat a few feet behind their libero.
What neither of you notice is the raised brow look of utter shock that oozes from center court. After all, it isn’t everyday a dubbed, ‘wall-flower’ like Sakusa Kiyoomi is kind to other people. At least that was what his selective personality reads off as when he’s interviewed with the rest of the team post game matches. Yet, that slowly started to change when you joined the team. If he was as moody as a grumpy kitten, you literally were a a wolf in sheep’s clothing. Running cross country was a sport you could do and surprisingly excelled at. Then again, it was also the reason why you were able to turn the sport you love into a hobby of marathon running. No one on your team ever really put two and two together whenever you would wake up before the sun was breaking the sky on your company retreat sans athletes. It wasn’t until the assistant coach unlocked the gym three months later their eyes saw you running suicides all over the court and now every other Monday when there is no morning practice, you’re allowed to come in and use the facilities at your leisure as long as you put away the mini cones you take out of storage.
Fast-forward four days and two dress fittings later, you send out a text to the member of the coaching staff you were outside the Museum of Modern Art South Entrance, which was the opposite way of the red carpet. Surely, reporters and other members of the media would be causing a ruckus trying to garner the attention of the various notable players who made the previous world champion team in 2019. You were fortunate at the time, to be an intern at Bishop Security Towers at the time while the fashion police broadcast was turned on at the cafeteria while you worked overnight to strengthen the code.
That was your previous “suit” job; after all, you were a system analyst for an upcoming Fortune 500 company who handled the banking details of the rich and famous in your side of the world. At the very least, you were able to afford your first studio flat all on your own in two months since your mentor asked (begged) for the department to pay you since you were the only intern who had a decent in-depth knowledge about cyber security. Now, to be fair, you really didn’t want to work for a company like that after graduation, so when your resume was uploaded to an internal server, you were surprised to receive a call for an interview at an arena. This time though, you were able to put your degree of hardwiring and electrical engineering to good use.
Your thoughts began to muddle together the past week’s events with the guys on the team partnering up with every available friendly women in the surrounding departments to learn proper etiquette because they wanted to boost their chances of, for lack of better words, “go stag and come back with a plus one, or two.” You squint at the statement made by the resident pretty boy setter as you grumble out a string of curses. It’s no secret you and the faux blonde setter don’t get along, but you don’t necessarily take any particular liking to his playboy personality. Bokkun is an amplified hype-man and you’re lucky he at least respects your boundaries after confiding in you his sisters were scary when they were upset and the sunshine child that came from Brazil is a kind breath of fresh air.
And in a surprise turn of events, during one mixer dinner at the local sushi house down the road, you were forcibly sat next to the enigma that is Sakusa. Your coworkers were too enamored by the charming lines Sakusa’s compatriots were dishing out the moment of the subject of “great pickup lines” was started by Mr Playboy himself. Sakusa has heard some of the most rancid lines his female fans have said at signings, but when all eyes turn to you expecting you to put in your two cents, you try to back away from the subject when you recall a botched first date who didn;t know you knew some sign language the second they turn off their hearing aid: you take a deep breath and you move your hands in front of you. Sakusa glances down and he knew sign because of his tutors for deaf jam nights at his university. He signs back and as you recap what you said, you downed your next sake shot, slightly embarrassed since you learned something about the young person next to you.
Currently, the side door is opened and you see your escort, the team’s head coach smile motioning for you to come inside. Throughout the first couple of hours of the night, you were introduced notable members of the sports’ business side. Some old friends of the coach’s thought you were his niece or spewed some non-sense about bringing morale up in a post-pandemic world.
“If I may,” you place your empty champagne flute on a caterer’s tray. “If you want to fill your arenas, you might want to take a look into your demographic. A lot of kids look up to those guys, so maybe you might want to look into family days.”
The older men in the circle around you chuckle saying that you were rather an intelligent young person. When asked which team you worked with or which player you’re dating, you stand in your heels a little taller and with a devilish smile on your lips, “The Jackals.”
The coach on your left actually has a smug proud look on his face after he pats your arm mentioning your conversation with his former colleagues was the most fun he had since Meian became captain.
“Go and enjoy the rest of the party, dear,” he said. He nods his well-styled hair in the direction of where some super models who paid little or no mind to Sakusa’s personal space and you recall how much it irritates him. “I’m sure you might need to help out a friend.”
The panicked glint in his eye was more than enough to set a fire under your feet as you thank your escort for emphasizing the budding acquaintance (now turned to week long trial period of friendship) with the collegiately ranked outside hitter. Coach squeezes your arm for luck before watching you walk away before another old friend called him over asking if you remember the Nekoma grad who is now trending social media for recruiting the Brazilian sunshine man thanks to their mutual friend.
“C’mon, take off that mask. I’m sure you’re as handsome as they say,” the nasally voice is practically seeping with desperation.
It comes as a shock when Sakusa takes the initiative without saying a damn word when he meets you halfway with the most relieved expression on his face. He signs a little bit and you take a peak over his shoulder when you step a little to the side. You glance back at those opaque eyes of his and you communicate the next step by looping your arm around his like you’ve both seen in those fancy party from the Americas. You instruct the athlete to lead a bit when you lean into him a bit more on purpose, hearing him scoff when you do so startled you into laughing. It’s a kind sound like a carillon of sound. Sakusa covers your knuckles with his as if on instinct, to keep you within arm’s reach is more like it.
“That’s new,” Meian said, pointing with his martini glass toward where you two stand.
“Nah, not really,” Hinata mentions coming back with a handful of mini-weenies. “Omi-kun found out she signs one night when we went out for drinks after the interdepartment mixer a month and a half ago. He actually kind of likes that about her… What? I thought you guys knew.”
Bokuto and Miya just stare between their kouhai while Meian suddenly shakes his head and above all the classical music filling the museum hall, you hear Miya yell, “Ya had Omi-omi’s number the whole time?!”
Bokuto quickly wraps his arms around his fellow teammates shoulders mentioning something about fraternizing with Komori and Ushiwaka (Tobio was using the restroom at the moment).
Currently, the haute model scoffs, shaking her head asking her uncle would mind if she headed out after being shot down. Her uncle on the other hand doesn’t mind after speaking with his colleagues asking who was coaching the Jackals next season and honestly, the sudden faux paux of not feeding into the attention the young lady sought after proved to be quite a media nightmare. After all it’s not everyday a person from a sports dynasty name gets shot down by the ever elusive stoic man that is part of the same sport which made her family famous in favor for the ‘commoner who wore a nameless gown.’
‘Are you ok?’ You mouth out, earning a nod and for the second time that week, you had the privilege of hearing his voice tell you he was. The first time was when Miya accidentally drew the unfortunate straw of being his ‘formal party buddy,’ when Meian insisted if either of member of the assigned pair got too drunk (or out of hand), the more sober one would, “stick their drunk ass in the nearest ride share at the end of the night.”
You were locking up the office for the night, leaving the left over wiring work for the third shifter on your team explaining you had a dress fitting appointment to get to (in actuality, you just had to hem your best sweat heart cocktail dress in the comfort of your home). Your co-worker mentions they didn’t mind coming in an hour early, so when you catch the tail end of Meian’s post-practice speech two nights before the main event, your eyes accidentally pause over Sakusa who’s worried expression finally had deepened knowing the blonde Miya had pulled his name. Meian does this at the behest of the coach every away game and honestly, if it weren’t for your little marathon run last week with the flash drive presentation, you’d have signed a good luck to Sakusa.
So when Sakusa who looms a clear foot and a half above you with your heels on, holds onto your upper arm in a soft, firm manner, you understood he wanted you to play up the “friends from work” ploy. The closeness between you two is palpable and it even sort of shocks those around you. A few photos were snapped silently of the two of you as you tap Sakusa’s shoulder after you finish the last mimosa a half hour prior. You ask him if he doesn’t mind joining you at the open bar across the art nouveau stained glass work. On the way there, you dive into your hobby of loving the art period. The bartender asks you what you’ll have and you ask for a whiskey sour.
“Sorry about ambushing you with my knowledge, I tend to do that. A lot,” you shrug, stirring your garnish in your short glass. You were slightly embarrassed by this.
“I don’t mind,” he admits a light tinge on appears on his ears and he blames the pink of the backlit stained glass.
“Y’know that is is first nice thing anyone has said to me tonight?” Your cynicism encourages him to pull down his mask so you can hear him a bit clearly since the mask obscured his first line, or so he thinks.
“I really don’t mind. Honestly, this is the first intelligent conversation I had with a pretty girl since my dating life is completely in the hands of the fans…”
Oh my god, he’s actually funny? No way, you thought. He quickly slid his mask back up when he signals the bartender to make the same drink for him. Much to your delight, he asks more questions about the art period you so loved. Slowly, but surely, you slowly chip away the touch exterior the same way Hinata accidentally did late one night in a dingy hotel room he shared (the boys played checkers until three that evening), and to the outside you two seemed to be bonding over some cocktails. Inwardly, though, spectators and other attendees notice how the once very stoic and serious persona of Sakusa alters into a pastel shade of warmer tones when he is around you: shoulders are visibly relaxed and for once in his two years of attending these functions, he looks like he’s having fun.
For the remainder of the function, Sakusa draws back the curtain a little behind what makes him, well, him. You find out his home life was sort of lonely and that shaped his personality into not liking larger crowds or needing to be touched unannounced. When you called him out on being hesitant about wanting to hold your hand when you walked side by side with him to where you were standing for twenty odd minutes, he mentions he didn’t want the lady from earlier to bother him again and by proxy you.
“You’re charming when you want to be,” you confide in him. “And between you and me, I don’t mind your strict need for cleanliness. It’s a by-product of being waited on hand and foot, right?” You called him charming, and unknown to you, he found it to be true for you too. For the rest of the party, he stuck around you or at the very least was no further than a few feet away when you were surrounded by a few members of what was deemed ‘extras’ by the assistant coaches (extras in a good way, like their prized interns from the JVA and apprentices). Apparently, you were the only engineer and sound person in attendance, but your seemingly effortless way of blending into the background was what drew you back to the wall where Sakusa stood in front of a Tiffany stained glass lamp circa 1819.
“We keep meeting,” you chuckle. “We might as well stay together…”
You notice you see Bokuto and Miya talking to a few prospective sports label reps. Then, Sakusa makes a small wager with you.
“Really? We’re betting on either of your teammates chances of actually walking away with a date?” You ask, grabbing another mini cocoa croissant, while Sakusa picks up a charcuterie cheese cube.
“Two hundred yen and one black coffee if you want me to be more specific,” he says.
“Sakusa Kiyoomi, you’re on.”
You extend a clean hand toward Sakusa and you two shake on it.
“Damn, I forgot about Hinata,” Sakusa realizes, but you tell him to not hold his breath.
“Mr Sunshine himself already secured three dates with NIKE, ADIDAS, and the JVA ladies over there,” you answer. You politely tell your new gambling partner to glance over your right shoulder to prove your statement. It’s not until the alarms at the team dorms the next morning at nine thirty for late morning practice after the gala Sakusa hears his setter’s voice saying, “call me,” to one of the women who hung onto his every word at the museum. Sakusa, rolls his eyes as he texted you he owns you coffee and two hundred yen since you placed your bid on the setter. You text him back with a crying laughing emoji and you tell him to have fun at practice since you were going back to sleep.
Somewhere else in the city, one model plots your demise after the boy she wanted to bed preferred some scrappy intern’s company over her. After all, if someone was going to ruin your Cinderella-inspired moment, it would take some bold model to fill the shoes of the wicked stepsisters, no? The last thing needed to complete this plan? Pressing the [[PUBLISH TWEET]] to her private account.
Thankfully, you don’t catch wind of the post until later that afternoon when you come in to install the final piece of the lightbulb for the visitors side of the score board and for a full month, Sakusa reverts back to being his standoff-self. At first you think nothing of it, but when the rest of the team witnesses him yell at you for something silly like accidentally bumping into him when you were getting ready to leave for the day.
“You didn’t have to yell,” your voice is much smaller; it lost its shine from when you spoke about the Tiffany glass from the museum. “I’m sorry for having bumped into you. I’ll pay more attention where I’m walking.”
For once, Sakusa realizes how much words can damage a good thing and he heads straight to the PR office and decides to sternly glare at the team staring back at him. He commands the room saying if playing nice with the model from last month means he would lose a new person who got him to finally open up a little more outside of his area of expertise, then may be it’s worth releasing a statement that he actually enjoys the company of the ‘nameless gown wearing engineer’who he was a real jerk to a few minutes ago.
When pushed into a corner, you do what you do best, you run. You run until your lungs are on fire; you don’t really feel the need to answer your phone even though when you glance down, you see the name of the last person you want to speak to because you would wind up saying things you don’t mean. At least for the next couple of hours. Ok, so a couple hours turn into calling out sick for three days since you didn’t have the heart to go into work. Simultaneously, those three days were filled with hellish practices. Usually it began with suicide sprints immediately after the three km run. And you were on radio silence, barely even responding with more than one or two words daily. Even Hinata, whom you befriended a few days after the gala, is given the silent treatment.
Eventually, on the Monday morning you have extra time before the team trickles in to the gym, you wave to the assistant coach signaling how you have an hour before practice officially began. Today, in a turn of events, you don’t bring your running shoes. Instead, you bring some dancer’s tape and pointe shoes. Winter was around the corner and an old friend asked if you could perform the lead in the children’s library production of a ballet you learned in middle school. You weren’t necessarily going to turn down the offer, but when you found out the tickets sales were going to be used to add an additional wing, you caved in and said you’ll do it. What you didn’t expect was for you to be reprising your role as winter fairy queen.
You continue to stretch until you feel limber enough to connect your phone to the Bluetooth speaker you kept in your locker. Using the court outlines as your stage markers, you begin to peel back a talent your engineering counter parts thought you made up. You run in the interim of showing your love of the sport, yet when asked if you were passionate in any of the performing arts during the team building retreat, you mentioned you like ballet (or dancing in general). You finish tying up your shoes along with burning the excess threads of the light blue slippers. You bend your feet to get used to the toe block before you take a deep breath performing a few noted positions, a gran jatê performed here and there makes the coach who watches you applaud when you land the third successfully.
“How much time I got?” you ask. The answer is still a whopping forty minutes, you accelerate your own self-practice. Humming the classical notes, you dedicate the next minutes into forcing your muscles to recall the positions of your hands and feet as you turn gracefully, slightly elongating your legs so when you stand straight on your toes after being flat foot for a moment, you rise with effortless ease. The tempo changes from soft harpsichords to brassy tones signaling the end of winter and the onslaught of thunder and rain.
“And I’m tellin’ ya, ya ought to call her…”
The four members of the MSBY team came earlier than expected. Roughly fifteen minutes before and you turn up the volume of the music on the speaker to drown out the racket outside. The assistant coach from earlier tells ‘em if they want to see something new, they best be quiet when they open the door where the music is the loudest.
You are in the middle of the toughest series of moves to master, which included a no arm turn jump you’ve seen many gymnasts (and figure skaters do), so here on your toes, you ‘fall’ to lose your crown and your power. Hence the snow turns to thunder and rain e sing the first half of the story. Your movements are powerful and precise, some may call it whimsical and fantastical, but you prove you can fly. And you do it gracefully as the song fades and you have a pained expression of a gem who lost their crown (you used an old beaded choker as a stand in that morning).
Your alarm blares and you turn around to see the five people you were avoiding for the last week staring at you in slight awe. You mumble a rushed, “excuse me,” and put away all your materials sans the shoes, because well, no one needs to see how blistered they were at the moment; you don’t give anyone the time to greet you.
“She looks well,” Bokuto tries to lighten the dampened mood.
He means well, his teammates knows that, but when Sakusa sends him a cold stare, the usually loud owl eccentric ‘normal’ ace kind of saunters on to the court. Hinata later on tries to contact you again, since today’s practice proved to be challenging for everyone since Omi-kun was in a more foul mood than before.
“Just tell her yer sorry and that ya miss her,” miya says during break. “Look. We’re public figures ever since we joined the team, omi-omi and we’re bound to get scrutinized every once in a while. Whatever happened that night between you and her made some stupid runway model jealous. So what?”
“It almost cost her her job,” Sakusa growls. “Do me a favor and don’t talk to me for a week, if that.”
Hinata let out a low whistle when Sakusa abruptly stands to throw his bento into his bag.
“That went well,” he added.
They watch their teammate break into a jog toward the parking lot in an attempt to find you. The walk usually is less than five minutes from the official entrance depending on where you park. Since it was a Monday morning, you were about to open your ride-share app as you stood in the opposite side of a luxury coupe you didn’t have time to figure out who owned it. Said owner was jogging toward you anyways, telling your name. The blood in your veins ran cold.
“Let me explain,” are the first words which follow after Sakusa slows down and leans against his pristine kept car.
“No,” you are bitter and angry.
More so that the offending source of your bitterness and spiteful tone and this is a new side of you no one has seen. Sure, dejected and shocked was the aftermath of when he yelled at you last week for an accident; then morosely depressed when you told him your apology; finally that morphed into your neutral face of displeasure. And it hurts him to think that you were this way because of his actions.
“You don’t get the right to explain anything to me. Not after you treat me in such a rude way,” you cross your arms over your chest and scoff over your shoulder.
Sakusa sighs, knowing he’s earned that one. There are very few people he’d set tear some of his walls down and you, for reasons beyond your control, finally break the top three.
“You’re right,” he mumbles.
“Excuse me?” Eyebrows raised and shoulders relaxing, you see embers of the person you made acquaintances with (and possibly friendship wasn’t too far off. Depends on his apology, you suppose).
“I said,” pulling down his mask so you could understand him a bit clearer. “You’re right.”
He isn’t prepared for the passive scolding you dish him and it’s damn near insulting how many curses you can fling at someone. You’re more blunt than he realizes and the acid in your tone is the right amount of a healed hurt when he chooses to say the same thing he said to his teammates about ten minutes prior.
“Someone published photos from the gala without my permission and you were standing next to me. The next thing I know, I’m pulled into the PR office trying to wrap my head around how and when this happened, but when we found the source, it was one of the girls who I walked away from when I saw you giving me an out…,” he says.
Judging by what he said, your eyebrows raise in surprise—Sakusa did this for you to keep your job?
“You should’ve told me,” you pout. Your rage dialed down significantly once you gather this Intel.
“Look, if I didn’t create some distance between you and I like I was advised to by both coach and the head of the PR team, you’d have a forced transfer e-mail sent because of something that’s not your fault.”
“So you’re default is to yell at your friends?” You shake your head.
“I just started to enjoy your company,” you whisper more to yourself than him, thankful he didn’t seem to have heard you. Or maybe he did when you notice he takes a slight step forward to speak again.
You put a hand up when you notice this and he remains silent. You make several gestures with your hands before turning around and walking away meaning you needed time to think. You mention even though you got your explanation, you still didn’t receive a sincere enough apology.
“Even if you did, Sakusa,” your tone is serious. “I don’t have to accept it.”
Three weeks go by and you’re back at work fixing certain panels. The ballet practices are going well and everyday, to get back in your good graces, Sakusa waits for you outside the rehearsal studio. Typically with either a bento, some bubble tea, or a myriad of take out menus close to the shopping plaza. This is the most effort anyone really has seen him put in outside of the court. All of the suggestions the guys give him range from the ridiculous and gaudy to the humble.
What he doesn’t know odd that your guesses as to who came up with the apology acts were pretty spot on:
“If I wanted Atsumu to apologize, then he should be standing where you are with the chocolate mouse from Satori’s second international location.”
Sakusa hit a brick wall after you said that, retuning the box to his hands. Was this a little petty and childish extreme? Sure, you reason. But only for two more days, you make a deal with yourself.
At the team dinner at Onigiri Miya, the restaurant entrepreneur picks up on the more sunken features of the resident sourpuss. When Osamu asks what’s eating Sakusa, Bokuto gives him the bullet points with hinata’s side comments. Atsumu glances at his brother and they have their usual, ‘you talk to him. he’d actually listen to you.’ telepathy conversations.
“Omi-kun, ya up for some tough love?”
Osamu slides into the booth, sitting across from the outside hitter. Today his wrists are a bit inflamed, so the braces he hasn’t worn since first year for a little more snug, Sakusa makes a note to buy some tomorrow before practice.
“…?”
“She’s making ya feel the same kinda hurt when ya yelled. And the reason why she hasn’t really accepted any sort o’ apology from ya was because those were how they’d apologize to her. So, tell her ya sorry fer being such an ass because some dumb model wanted ta jump ya bones.”
Later that night, when Sakusa checks his mailbox, there in your handwriting is a note attached to a box of wrist stints. Your handwriting is a bit smudged and without any warning, the idiot breaks into a sprint after asking Hinata (of all people) for your address. (Hinata stayed at your place for a day after spending time watching/participating in a 24-hour stream with KodzuKen because you were closer to the team dorms).
It’s nearly eleven thirty and you were in the middle of falling asleep listening to a rerun of an old sitcom. Sakusa is sort of glistening when he decides to knock on your door, repeatedly. You’re not expecting anyone, so maybe it was the neighbor from 4e asking you if you’d like some extra leftovers. But when you unlock your door to open it enough to see who it is, the chain to your door screeches softly. You tell him to stand back a little and you undo the chain, thus opening the door out (your unit is an older one), motioning for him to come inside.
“How’d you find me?” you inquire locking your door behind him.
“Hinata told me,” Sakusa says. His mask was pulled down again once he entered your home. He takes a seat on the bar stool when you offer it to him. You listen as he explains everything leading up to him showing up at your place.
“You ran here?” you had lead him to your kitchen and pour him a second glass of water. You decide to pour some to.
“My friend from work has to deal with this annoying jackass of a jerk, who despite having the first best night in a long time at some gala talking with her, gave into what other people advised him to do. He went about it all wrong, distancing himself from her, being dismissive whenever she came back with an extra coffee order, and it all came to a head when he yelled at her for bumping into him…”
You hum, encouraging him to continue.
“And so this friend from work had to put up with him and his friends finding out she has a killer hobby of being into ballet, and when she runs out to the parking lot, my friend hears the truth about why the jackass was being well, a—”
“Jackass?”
You bite back a triumphant smile, but you don’t have the heart to add any more salt into a healing wound.
“Thank you. The two of ‘em have a falling out of sorts, so this guy talks to his friends who give him pointers in trying to make her accept his apology ranging from simple flower bouquets, to buying these really expensive chocolates, until finally the jerk talks to a head chef at an onigiri shop who enlightens him that maybe, maybe trying to come up with apology that is uniquely his makes my friend forgive him?”
By this point, Sakusa is exasperated when he glances down at his empty cup. He seemed more dejected than dehydrated at that point and he swirls the glass like a child who was scolded for eating the last cookie before bed. You push your glass aside and tap the counter top, forcing him to look up at you; a calm sense of understanding is made apparent.
“And did that guy run all the way here from the restaurant to tell your friend how he felt?”
Sakusa nods, but he glances to the side, slightly wincing when he feels the old stints press into his skin. You frown at the bruising lines the brace had made when you take his hand in yours without asking. He winces again when you curl your fingers under his to extend his own in a relaxed position on your granite counter.
“Is this ok?” You ask. Your voice is like spun sugar when he returns his attention to you. You show him some kindness when you tell him you’re going to remove his braces. You have some ice sacks in the freezer whenever you have a migraine (you explain).
“So, does your friend forgive the jerk?” you coyly inquire when you place the pouch over swollen joints.
“Dear gods I hope so because it’s been torture trying to go through practice with those guys,” Sakusa mutters through gritted teeth.
You shake your head, chortling away as you sign, ‘Sakusa Kiyoomi, if you ever do that to me again, whether intentional or not, I’m not going to forgive you as easily.’
“Your signing got better,” he muses. You almost head butted him with a stern look. Instead, your foreheads touch slightly, and it lends a hand as being the first sign of any sort of intimacy you both share. He closes his eyes, a short echo of a smile graces his usually stone features.
+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+
Extra: December 12th, 20XX
“Omi! C’mon! We’re gonna be late! Meian said the car’s downstairs!” Hinata is pounding on his floor mate’s door. Apparently when word gets out thanks to the department head for your division you’re casted in the lead of the ballet benefiting the children’s library, tickets were bought to a sold out opening night. A lot of old and familiar faces that worked with the V League team came to show support for one of their multi-talented friends.
Backstage, the stage manager makes a quick last minute announcement saying that there are some very important people in the audience.
“Collectively, they donated the remaining amount we needed to expand,” he pauses for the gasps and applauds. “Apparently, someone knows some pretty cool guys.”
“Ten minutes to curtain call!” The costume designer announces shortly thereafter and when you don the navy and silver regalia of the winter fae queen, you peek out at the audience and if you weren’t going to kill your boss, you’d at least let your friend in the second row behind the orchestra give you the snapdragon bouquet in his hands. Hinata sits to his left and Meian (who brought his five year old niece) sits to his right. The flowers were all Sakusa’s idea, but there was collaborative effort in choosing the snapdragon; after all, you did prove you embody the deviousness gracefully. In the small envelope, written in typeface inspired kanji, a three word confession is written (and suddenly, in a weird sense of familiar mutual anxiousness, your inner voices collectively quiet down long enough to remember who you’re most eager to see after the final bow). Sakusa wonders how nervous you are, but he’s sat on in your dress rehearsal with your final costume worn and he saw you dance the same solo from three months ago when he saw you at the gym. He knows you’re going to be loved by the kids, but he wonders if you’re up for having him take a crack at learning to love all aspects of you.
The overture begins and the curtains rise, with a deep breath, the fairytale starts.
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mypoisonedvine · 4 years
Text
Love, Theoretically | Sebastian Stan x reader (Chapter 4)
(Chapter 1) (Chapter 2) (Chapter 3)
series summary: having lost your husband, sister, and best friend all to the same extramarital affair, you ran away to a secluded villa in the Hungarian countryside to write and get a little time away from the life you’d left behind.  you were only looking for peace and perhaps some inspiration for your novel, but instead you found an unlikely connection with the immigrant repairman– even though the two of you don’t speak the same language.
word count: 2.5k
warnings: some awkwardness, and almost-nudity, and a sex scene but not the kind you’re expecting (lol) just fluff y’all!
moodboard and inspiration credit to @evnscvll​
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Mrs. Alberti asking you for the rent made you realize a month had passed.  You couldn’t tell if it had gone by quickly or slowly; a little of both, perhaps.
You pulled the finished page from your typewriter and placed it in the stack.  You were finally done with the first chapter; pretty good for a month of time to work, incredible for how distracted you’d been.  Still, as you flipped through the pages you’d worked on, you appreciated that this was simply the very beginning of a very early draft.  You realized you should probably write the ending next, as that was usually how you handled a mystery like this, but you were compelled to try a different method this time and see if you could get the first draft done chronologically.  You got the sense that this story wasn’t going to end the way you’d thought it would when you’d started it...
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Your evening jog took a new path this time, one which happened to run right past the smaller cottage that Mrs. Alberti inhabited.  You noticed her windows were open— as they should be on a day as nice as this— and for a second you glanced and saw someone inside…
Wait, is that… Arnold Schwarzenegger?
With a chuckle, you realized that you were seeing the TV.  As you ran further ahead, the angle changed to show it was Sebastian sitting on the end of her bed and watching it.  She’d mentioned that she was going out for groceries today… was he just hanging out in there to get some TV time, or was he taking a break from something he’d been doing for her?
This pressing question needed answers ASAP.  The only solution now was to go inside and talk to him, of course.
His eyes stayed glued on the screen even as you stepped into the house and pushed open the creaky old door to the bedroom.  Seeing the TV again, you realized that this wasn’t just any old Arnold Schwarzenegger movie— it was the best Arnold Schwarzenegger movie.
“Are you watching Terminator?” you asked with incredulous joy, and he finally turned around.
“Da!” he beamed.  “Terminatorul,” he explained, pointing to the television.  “Ma voi intoarce,” he mimicked in a deep voice.
“I’ll be back!” you translated as you realized he was quoting the most iconic line, sitting down next to him on the foot of the bed and watching the movie as well.
It was dubbed in Romanian— technically you couldn’t tell that it was Romanian just by hearing it, but you could tell based on how entranced Sebastian was by it; he must’ve understood what was going on.  The best part was that you understood it too, based mainly on context clues and your vague memory of the movie.  Being able to share something with him was unexpectedly gratifying.    
He was over halfway in, and you were trying to figure out what was going on now; this scene was all a conversation, so it was all lost on you.  Sarah Connor and what’s-his-face talking about something, presumably about how her son was the future leader of the resistance against the machines.  You realized that this was a sort of strange movie.  And why was the guy shirtless for seemingly no reason?  No wonder Sebastian likes this movie, this guy must be his role model, you thought as you chuckled to yourself.
Okay, they weren’t talking anymore… they were kissing.  That’s fine— good for them right?  It’s not weird to watch this right next to Sebastian… although it is weird that they’re still kissing...
Oh god.  This movie has a sex scene?  Why didn’t you remember this part?
You cleared your throat and avoided looking at him.  But that just meant you were staring down the screen, and didn’t that make it seem like you were really into Linda Hamilton getting sensually railed?  So you glanced to him to break the tension and nope, that definitely made it worse as you both suddenly made eye contact and then instantly looked away.  Your heart was racing for no particularly good reason, and your palms were all sweaty— just in time for his hand to brush against yours.  You didn’t want to jerk away for fear of seeming flighty.  Nothing wrong with the side of his hand touching yours, right?
Well, a lot of things were wrong with it, specifically the way that it was making your breaths short and the hairs on the back of your neck stand up, but you didn’t want him to know any of that so you stayed still.
It seemed to go on forever, and it would’ve been laughably cheesy if you were with anyone else.  Normally, you had no trouble at all laughing with Sebastian, but this was different.  
“Această parte este... interesantă…” Sebastian mumbled.  
“I didn’t realize it was going to go on this long,” you replied, scratching the back of your neck.  “It’s probably good to break the silen— oh shit, that’s a boob!” you gasped.  “They can show this on TV?!”
Sebastian laughed a bit, apparently noticing how your change in tone conveniently coincided with the nip-slip.  
Just a few more minutes of excruciating awkwardness and it was over; you both let out a not-so-subtle sigh of relief when it ended.
“I thought it would never end,” you chuckled nervously.
“Nu fi gelos, ea nu este nimic în comparație cu tine,” he replied, still looking at you even though you were looking anywhere but back at him.  You weren’t sure you’d ever be able to look him in the eye again after that— not that it had ever been easy for you.  But now that he was staring at you it felt even weirder to not look back.  So you did, just for a second, only to be startled by the sound of the bedroom door opening.
You jumped up from the bed, and Sebastian turned as well.
“Oh!” Mrs. Alberti gasped.  “I didn’t expect to see… both of you in here.”
“Ți-am răsturnat salteaua și ți-am schimbat așternutul,” Sebastian offered as he jumped up, motioning to the bed quickly.  What could he possibly mean by that?
“We were just watching some TV,” you explained.
“Uh huh,” Mrs. Alberti smiled.  “Well, Sebastian, that’ll be all, thank you,” she dismissed him with a smile and a little bow.  
“Mulțumesc. Bună seara,” Sebastian bowed in return, nodding at you before scurrying out of the room.  You started to leave as well, but Mrs. Alberti stopped you with a hand on your shoulder.
“Sweetheart, were you two really just watching TV?” she asked quietly, eyebrow raised in question.
“Um, yeah…” you replied, confused.
“Then why did you both jump up like I was interrupting something important?  Seriously, I was concerned you were in the middle of ruining the sheets he’d just put on for me.”
You choked but broke into an awkward grin.  “Uh, I’m not sure.  I guess you just startled us.”
“Yes, well, it’s my room, so you maybe shouldn’t be so surprised when I show up there next time.  You two have the whole house to yourselves, not sure why you had to come all the way over here—”
“Mrs. Alberti, really, it’s not like that,” you assured.
She squinted as she leaned in closer, examining your face.  With her incredibly short stature, she had to pull you down towards her to get a better look.  “Hmph,” she frowned suddenly, “I don’t think you’re lying.  Honestly?  I sort of wish you were.”
“Wh— why?” you stammered.
“I don’t know,” she shrugged, “I suppose I thought you two would make a handsome couple.”
“Yeah, well, he’d be doing most of the heavy lifting in that department,” you chuckled.
“You speak poorly of yourself too often,” she frowned again, slapping you on the shoulder.  “You’re perfectly deserving of someone like Sebastian.”
“Well, that’s sort of irrelevant, isn’t it?  We don’t even speak the same language,” you reminded her firmly.
“Did you and your ex-husband speak the same language?” 
You stopped, straightening up and looking back at her with wide eyes.
“I’m old,” she explained with a glimmer in her eye, “but I’m not stupid.  And I’m sorry that you’re going through that.”
“Um, thank you,” you mumbled, still shell shocked from her deduction and from hearing someone refer to your husband as your ex-husband for the first time.  You figured you should get into that habit soon, but it was difficult to imagine.  Even as much as you’d loved being here so far, part of you imagined that it was just a vacation, and soon you’d go home and go back to the life you’d had.  Of course you would go back home someday, it wasn’t like you were moving to the Hungarian countryside, but the home you’d be going back to was going to be entirely unrecognizable to you.  “And, to answer your question,” you continued, “of course my hu— ex-husband spoke English…”
Mrs. Alberti laughed, but in a sad way.  It was the saddest you’d seen her since you’d arrived, even more than when she’d told you about Mr. Alberti’s passing.  “Sweetheart,” she sighed, “obviously you both spoke English.  But I don’t think you spoke the same language at all.”
You furrowed your brows as you pondered that.  You’d known what she meant the first time she said it, but you hadn’t allowed yourself to accept it.  Mostly because it made you immediately realize that she was right about your marriage.  If only she’d thought to tell you before it had ended the way it did.
“Goodnight,” she smiled, stepping past you as you left her room, and her house, and stepped into the night.
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You usually worked in your room, but it was feeling a little extra musty this morning so you decided to haul your typewriter to the lakeside and work in the sunshine and fresh air.  You could’ve asked Sebastian to lift it for you, but frankly, you'd been hoping to avoid Sebastian as he had been the biggest barrier to your writing progress so far.  And yet, with your luck, of course he would appear— and not to garden or hammer or do anything like that, but simply to bring you coffee.
"Cafea," he smiled as he offered you the mug.
You accepted it with a smile of your own, although you wondered if he could tell you were nervous.  "Thank you—”
You were cut off by him lifting your empty mug from this morning, which had been holding down all of your completed pages.  The wind inconveniently picked up at that moment, and instantly the pages were swept into the air and right towards the lake.
"Shit!" you yelped as you lept up, pushing him aside to run to the pier.  Still, you couldn't even get close to catching any of them, and watched helplessly as they fell into the water.
You felt yourself be shoved away and didn't realize until he was in the water that it was Sebastian, diving past you to swim after your papers.
"No, don't— it's not worth it!” you called out, but he ignored you, paddling ahead with all the determination and speed of a professional swimmer— maybe he was one before he did this, you wouldn’t know.  You chewed your nails and felt horrifically guilty for all the work he was doing, and with a burst of foreign courage, you found yourself shirking your cardigan and shirt to join him.  Maybe he didn’t mind getting his clothes wet with dirty lake water, but you did.  
As you shimmied your skirt down, he looked back at you and his eyes went a little wide.  When you woke up this morning, you had no intentions of stripping in front of Sebastian, let alone near-skinny dipping with him, but then again, you hadn’t planned on half your novel blowing away either.  
You tossed your clothes aside and took one last stabilizing breath before diving in.
“Fuck, it’s cold!” you screeched once your head was back above the surface, and you heard him laughing.  You weren’t particularly in a laughing mood as you tried to grab the soaked papers around you.
“Arăți ca o pisică care a căzut în cadă,” he chuckled as he swam closer again, holding a ball of wet parchment in his hand and grabbing a few more on the way.
After fishing a few final pages out of the reeds, the two of you awkwardly walked up to the shore.  Now that you were in your underwear with the wind blowing on you, you were jealous of his wet clothes which, while doing almost nothing, did at least shield him from the elements.
You dashed into the cottage side-by-side, like kids racing down the street— though really it was just a matter of self preservation.  When you did make it inside, you started to lay the papers flat on the table to at least start the drying process; you hadn’t even realized he’d left the room until he came back and wrapped a fluffy towel around you, giving you one of those gentle smiles that made your heart just melt.
“Thank you,” you mumbled, noticing the way his hands rested on your shoulders longer than they needed to.  Even through the terrycloth his hands felt strong, and warm, and his touch made you shiver in a way totally irrelevant to the cold.
“Cu plăcere,” he replied.
“It’s a shame you can’t understand me,” you sighed.  Only as you said it aloud did you realize that he did understand you; sure, he didn’t understand the words you were speaking, but, in a way no one else had before, he understood you.  Somehow.
“Nu vorbesc engleza, dar înțeleg limba iubirii,” he spoke softly, nearly a whisper.  “Și cred că înțelegeți și voi asta.”
Even with no idea what he was saying, the way that he was looking at you said even more.  You wanted to kiss him more than you'd wanted anything in a long time, but even in that wretchedly perfect moment you knew it wasn't worth the trouble.  First of all, you couldn't be sure that he felt anywhere near the same way about you.  Secondly, even if he did, this was exactly the wrong time— and place, now that you thought about it— to be starting something.  Thirdly, he probably didn't want to start something at all!  He was just a nice young man who did exceptionally stupid things in order to make you happy.  That's normal handyman stuff, right?
'Odd jobs,' that's what Mrs. Alberti had said he did for her, and for you by extension as a guest in her place.
"Cafea?" Sebastian offered you, stepping back towards the kitchen.
"Yes, thank you," you nodded quickly, smiling at him.  He smiled back and carded his fingers through his damp hair before disappearing into the kitchen to start a fresh pot.
Odd jobs indeed.
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wisteriabookss · 4 years
Text
Why Nesta Stans Stan Nesta: For The People Who Don’t Get It.
I think one of the biggest misunderstandings towards Nesta fans is that we don’t acknowledge or understand that she emotionally, mentally, and verbally abused Feyre. We know. We very much know. And if you come across a fan who doesn’t, then please educate them! I’m not afraid to say that this past week I was educated on this as well. 
I think a lot of anti-nesta’s focus on Nesta in ACOTAR, whereas Nesta stans see the progression of her character throughout all three books. Nesta stans see her potential to grow, learn, and change. This in no way makes her past actions excusable. Nothing can do that. But clinging to the idea that someone isn’t able to evolve will cause more harm than good, especially in cases like Nesta’s where they have shown they have the ability to evolve (examples coming later in the post).
Not all abusers can learn from their mistakes; some are just too far gone and don’t see their actions as wrong. But some can, and I believe Nesta is one of those who can. My reason for this belief comes from reading ACOWAR.
1.) Nesta holds herself back from saying something insulting to Mor after she says something in a rude tone to her, and instead approaches Feyre. This shows that a) She’s learning to hold her tongue instead of saying something stupid, and b) She says something nice to Feyre, which she wouldn’t have done two books ago. I’m not saying her being nice to Feyre makes up for how she acted towards her before, but the point is to show that Nesta is now uplifting Feyre instead of tearing her down.
“Where is he?”
“Who?” Rhys crooned.
“Cassian.”
I didn’t think I’d ever heard his name from her lips. Cassian had always been him or that one. And Nesta had been … pacing in the foyer.
As if she was worried.
I opened my mouth, but Mor beat me to it. “He’s busy.”
I’d never heard her voice so … sharp. Icy.
Nesta held Mor’s stare. Her jaw tightened, then relaxed, then tightened—as if fighting some battle to keep questions in. Mor didn’t drop her gaze.
. . . . .
“Mor was watching both carefully—the warning she’d given my sister ringing silently between them. And Nesta, Mother damn it all, seemed to remember. Seemed to rein in whatever words she’d been about to spit and just approached me.
And nearly made my heart stop dead with shock as she said, “You look beautiful.”
2.) Nesta didn’t know Feyre couldn’t read, so if I see one more post using “Nesta didn’t teach Feyre how to read,” as another example of how Nesta abused her, I’ll scream. There are a lot of other examples to show her abuse, but not this one. Nesta clearly wanted to teach Feyre how to read if she knew she couldn’t. 
“I didn’t know you couldn’t really read,” Nesta said as she paused before a nondescript section, noticing the way I silently sounded out the words of a title. “I didn’t know where you were in your lessons—when it all happened. I assumed you could read as easily as us.”
“Well, I couldn’t.”
“Why didn’t you ask us to teach you?”
I trailed a finger over the neat row of spines. “Because I doubted you would agree to help.”
Nesta stiffened like I’d hit her, coldness blooming in those eyes. She tugged a book from a shelf. “Amren said Rhysand taught you to read.”
My cheeks heated. “He did.” And there, deep beneath the world, with only darkness for company, I asked, “Why do you push everyone away but Elain?” Why have you always pushed me away?
Some emotion guttered in her eyes. Her throat bobbed. Nesta shut her eyes for a moment, breathing in sharply. “Because—”
2b) The reason why I highlighted the last part is because I think Nesta is showing shame here. I think she is ashamed of what she did, and she can’t be ashamed of her actions unless she knows her actions were wrong. Like I said up top, an abuser who can’t change is one who doesn’t see their actions as wrong; Nesta sees her actions as wrong.
3.) When they’re running from the Ravens the King of Hybern sent to kidnap Nesta, we see a moment of trust between the sisters that I don’t think we’ve ever seen anywhere else in the entire series. I love this because it highlights their growing trust in one another.
“I gripped Nesta’s fingers in my free hand. She glanced at me.
I need you to trust me, I tried to convey to her.
Nesta read the emotion in my eyes—and gave the barest dip of her chin.”
4.) In that cabin, Nesta basically left Feyre to fend for herself. In this excerpt of them escaping the Ravens, you see Nesta not wanting to leave Feyre. 
“Run toward the light,” I breathed to Nesta. “I’ll hold them off.”
“No.”
. . . . . 
We didn’t have time—for whatever was down here to find us. We didn’t have time—
“Run,” I breathed. “Please.”
She hesitated.
“Please,” I begged her, my voice breaking.”
5.) So many people try to shit on Nesta for trying to cross the wall but not actually crossing it because she couldn’t find a hole, which I think is so stupid cause it’s not her fault if she couldn’t find one. You can tell from this quote that even the simple act of trying meant the world to Feyre, so I hate it when people try to diminish what she did.
“Rhys stared her down. But Nesta looked to me—and I could have sworn fear shone there, and guilt and … some other feeling. “You told me to run.”
“You’re my sister,” was all I said. She’d once tried to cross the wall to save me.”
5b) An extra scene from ACOTAR to show ya’ll just how much this meant to Feyre:
“My hands slackened at my sides. “You went after me,” I said. “You went after me—to Prythian.”
“I got to the wall. I couldn’t find a way through.”
I raised a shaking hand to my throat. “You trekked two days there and two days back—through the winter woods?”
She shrugged, looking at the sliver she’d pried from the table. “I hired that mercenary from town to bring me a week after you were taken. With the money from your pelt. She was the only one who seemed like she would believe me.”
“You did that—for me?”
Nesta’s eyes—my eyes, our mother’s eyes—met mine. “It wasn’t right,” she said again. Tamlin had been wrong when we’d discussed whether my father would have ever come after me—he didn’t possess the courage, the anger. If anything, he would have hired someone to do it for him. But Nesta had gone with that mercenary. My hateful, cold sister had been willing to brave Prythian to rescue me.
“What happened to Tomas Mandray?” I asked, the words strangled.
“I realized he wouldn’t have gone with me to save you from Prythian.”
And for her, with that raging, unrelenting heart, it would have been a line in the sand.
I looked at my sister, really looked at her, at this woman who couldn’t stomach the sycophants who now surrounded her, who had never spent a day in the forest but had gone into wolf territory … Who had shrouded the loss of our mother, then our downfall, in icy rage and bitterness, because the anger had been a lifeline, the cruelty a release. But she had cared—beneath it, she had cared, and perhaps loved more fiercely than I could comprehend, more deeply and loyally. “Tomas never deserved you anyway,” I said softly.
My sister didn’t smile, but a light shone in her blue-gray eyes. “Tell me everything that happened,” she said—an order, not a request.
So I did.
And when I finished my story, Nesta merely stared at me for a long while before asking me to teach her how to paint.”
5c) Remember how in the beginning of ACOTAR Nesta insulted Feyre’s paintings? A couple hundred pages later she just asked Feyre to teach her. Nesta was already progressing (albeit at a snails pace I know) in ACOTAR, before anything had really happened.
6.) Back to ACOWAR, in this excerpt Nesta is asking Feyre why she didn’t hesitate going into the Battle of Adriata. I think the reason Nesta asks this question is because in the cabin, Nesta thought Feyre was trying to help their family in order to gain power over them, rather than an act of selflessness. It forces Nesta to think about her actions in the past, and, in the hopes of doing better, she decides to go to the High Lords meeting with them to fight alongside them. Feyre’s selflessness inspired Nesta to do better, and Nesta took the opportunity to do so. This is growth.
“Nesta only spoke when I rose to my feet. “You’re going to that meeting in two days.”
“Yes.”
I braced myself for whatever she intended to say.
Nesta glanced toward the front windows, as if still waiting, still watching.
“You went off into battle. Without a second thought. Why?”
“Because I had to. Because people needed help.”
Her blue-gray eyes were near-silver in the trickle of morning light. But Nesta said nothing else, and after waiting for another moment, I left, winnowing up to the House for my flying lesson with Azriel.”
. . . . .
“I felt Cassian’s attention slide to us, felt them all look as Nesta said, “I’m going with you.”
No one said anything.
Nesta only lifted her chin. “I …” I’d never seen her stumble for words. “I do not want to be remembered as a coward.”
“No one would say that,” I offered quietly.
“I would.” Nesta surveyed us all, her gaze jumping past Cassian. Not to slight him, but … avoid answering the look he was giving her. Approval—more. “It was some distant thing,” she said. “War. Battle. It … it’s not anymore. I will help, if I can. If it means … telling them what happened.”
“You’ve given enough,” I said, my dress rustling as I braved a solitary step toward her. “Amren claimed you were close to mastering whatever skill you need. You should stay—focus on that.”
“No.” The word was steady, clear. “A day or two delay with my training won’t make any difference. Perhaps by the time we return, Amren will have decoded that spell in the Book.” She shrugged with a shoulder. “You went off to battle for a court you barely know—who barely see you as friends. Amren showed me the blood ruby. And when I asked you why … you said because it was the right thing. People needed help.” Her throat bobbed. “No one is going to fight to save the humans beneath the wall. No one cares. But I do.” She toyed with a fold in her dress. “I do.”
7.) In front of the entire IC and all the High Lords, Nesta makes it clear that she wouldn’t have survived those years in the cabin without her sister. Correct me if I’m wrong, but this is the first time she’s ever even acknowledged or spoken about it.
“She looked to Kallias and Viviane. “I am sorry for the loss of those children. The loss of one is abhorrent.” She shook her head. “But beneath the wall, I witnessed children—entire families—starve to death.” She jerked her chin at me. “Were it not for my sister … I would be among them.”
My eyes burned, but I blinked it away.”
8.) When Nesta senses something wrong at the High Lords meeting, she comes so close to saying she cares for Feyre, and cares for her safety. Cause really, the only person there who she would admit to caring about would be her sister (I know Cassian is there but she wouldn’t have admitted that lets be honest lmao). Also, in the first book Nesta was very selfish and only cared (outwardly) about herself and Elain. We see her being selfless here. 
“Something is wrong,” Nesta insisted.
“I’m not doubting you feel that way but … If none of the others are picking it up—”
“I am not like the others.” Her throat bobbed. “We need to leave.”
“I can send you back to Velaris, but we have things to discuss here—”
“I don’t care about me, I—”
9.) Book one Nesta wouldn’t pick up a pinky to help anyone or anything, but in ACOWAR she basically becomes a medic. She gets her hand dirty.
“No, Nesta only made sure that Elain was dozing in her tent, and then offered to help cut up linen for bandages.”
. . . . .
“How do I fix it?” she asked. Her hair had been tied in a loose knot atop her head earlier in the day, and in the hours that we’d worked to ready and distribute supplies to the healers, through the heat and humidity, stray tendrils had come free to curl about her temple, her nape. Faint color had stained her cheeks from the sun, and her forearms, bare beneath the sleeves she’d rolled up, were flecked with mud.
. . . . .
“I helped with the wounded long into the night, Mor and Nesta working alongside me.“
10.) When Nesta was pacing outside of the tent waiting to hear about Cassian’s condition, Mor attacks her again for literally caring about his well being. And Nesta, again, bites her tongue, says nothing, and walks away. I’m currently working on another post that goes in depth about the relationship between Nesta and Mor, but the point of this excerpt is to highlight how Nesta’s immediate response is to no longer bite back when someone comes after her. That being cold and bitchy all the time isn’t worth it (although I do think Nesta would be in the right here to say something back if she wanted to).
“I squinted at the watery light—the very last before true dark. When my vision adjusted … Nesta stood by the nearest tent, an empty water bucket between her feet. Her hair a damp mess atop her mud-flecked head. Watching us emerge, grim-faced—
“He’s fine. Healed and awake,” I said quickly.
Nesta’s shoulders sagged a bit.
She’d saved me the trouble of hunting her down to ask her about tracking the Cauldron. Better to do it now, with some privacy. Especially before Amren arrived.
But Mor said coldly, “Shouldn’t you be refilling that bucket?”
Nesta went stiff. Sized up Mor. But Mor didn’t flinch from that look.
After a moment, Nesta picked up her bucket, mud caked up to her shins, and continued on, steps squelching.” 
11.) When the sisters slept beside each other after Elain was saved, Feyre points out how different they sleep now. Instead of fighting with one another over the space, they held onto each other. This symbolizes their growing togetherness and how before, they were against each other, and now, they’re a team.
“A moment later, another warm body nestled on my left. Nesta’s scent drifted over me, fire and steel and unbending will.
Distantly, I heard Rhys usher everyone out—to join him in checking on Azriel, now under Thesan’s care.
I didn’t know how long my sisters and I lay there together, just like we had once shared that carved bed in that dilapidated cottage. Then—back then, we had kicked and twisted and fought for any bit of space, any breathing room.
But that morning, as the sun rose over the world, we held tight. And did not let go.”
12.) Nesta tells them to use her as bait to get the King of Hybern away from the cauldron. Literally a suicide mission. Probably the most selfless act she’s done this entire series.
Nesta stared toward that armada, toward our father fighting in it. “Use me. As bait.”
I blinked at the same moment Cassian said, “No.”
Nesta ignored him. “The king is probably waiting beside that Cauldron. Even if you get there, you’ll have him to contend with. Draw him out. Draw him far away. To me.”
13.) Nesta doesn’t stop fighting the King of Hybern after already spending all her power trying to do so. She starts to lure him away from Cassiand and the cauldron in order to buy Feyre more time.
“Nesta rushed to him, kneeling.
Not to comfort.
But to pick up his Illyrian blade.
Cassian tried to stop her as she stood. As Nesta lifted that sword before the King of Hybern.
She said nothing. Only held her ground.
The king chuckled and angled his own blade. “Shall I see what the Illyrians taught you?”
He was upon her before she could lift the sword higher.
Nesta jumped back, clipping his sword with her own, eyes flaring wide. The king lunged again, and Nesta again dodged and retreated through the trees.
Leading him away—away from Cassian.
She managed to draw him another few feet before the king grew bored.
In two movements, he had her disarmed. In another, he struck her across the face, so hard she went down.
Cassian cried out her name, trying again to crawl to her.
The king only sheathed his sword, towering over her as she pushed off the ground. “Well? What else do you have?”
Nesta turned over, and threw out a hand.
White, burning power shot out of her palm and slammed into his chest.
A ploy. To get him close. To lower his guard.
Her power sent him flying back, trees snapping under him. One after another after another.
The Cauldron seemed to settle. All that was left—that was it. All that was left of her power.”
14.) Do I even have to say it?
“Nesta surged to her feet, staggering across the clearing, blood at her mouth from where he’d hit her, and threw herself to her knees before Cassian. “Get up,” she sobbed, hauling at his shoulder. “Get up.”
He tried—and failed.
“You’re too heavy,” she pleaded, but still tried to raise him, fingers scrabbling in his black, bloodied armor. “I can’t—he’s coming—”
“Go,” Cassian groaned.
Her power had stopped hurling the king across the forest. He now stalked toward them, brushing off splinters and leaves from his jacket—taking his time. Knowing she would not leave. Savoring the awaiting slaughter.
Nesta gritted her teeth, trying to haul Cassian up once more. A broken sound of pain ripped from him. “Go! ” he barked at her.
“I can’t,” she breathed, voice breaking. “I can’t.”
The same words Rhys had given him.
Cassian grunted in pain, but lifted his bloodied hands—to cup her face. “I have no regrets in my life, but this.” His voice shook with every word. “That we did not have time. That I did not have time with you, Nesta.”
She didn’t stop him as he leaned up and kissed her—lightly. As much as he could manage.
Cassian said softly, brushing away the tear that streaked down her face, “I will find you again in the next world—the next life. And we will have that time. I promise.”
The King of Hybern stepped into that clearing, dark power wafting from his fingertips.
And even the Cauldron seemed to pause in surprise—surprise or some … feeling as Nesta looked at the king with death twining around his hands, then down at Cassian.
And covered Cassian’s body with her own.
Cassian went still—then his hand slid over her back.
Together. They’d go together.
I will offer you a bargain, I said to the Cauldron. I will offer you my soul. Save them.
“Romantic,” the king said, “but ill-advised.”
Nesta did not move from where she shielded Cassian’s body.”
15.) Nesta killed the King of Hybern. Killed their biggest foe, the person who was going to rip apart their entire world. I know Elain stabbed him, but as she herself put it:
“Elain fell into step beside me, peering at Lucien. He noticed it. “I heard you made the killing blow,” he said.
Elain studied the trees ahead. “Nesta did. I just stabbed him.”
16.) And finally, Nesta walks in side by side with Feyre into the treaty meeting. This also symbolizes the bond they’ve been forming with each other, that goes beyond just sisterhood.
“I offered my hand to my sister. “I want you here for this. With me.”
Nesta considered that outstretched hand. For a moment, I thought she’d walk away.
But she slid her hand into mine, and together we walked into that room crammed with humans and Fae. Both parts of this world. All parts of this world.”
All these examples show a different Nesta than the Nesta in book one. She has become selfless, more aware of her own actions, and grown up. 
To close this out, it was so painful reading ACOFAS because of the regression of Nesta and Feyre’s relationship when they were going down such a good path. I think the reason why SJM made Nesta go down an even darker hole than Feyre (not trauma wise, I’m not comparing the two, but recovery wise) is because she wanted to show another example of how trauma can have an effect on people. 
All of the IC are still healing, but they’re all healing relatively the same way, ie. surrounding themselves with each other and going about business as usual. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with that, if it works for them then thats amazing. 
But it’s disappointing when I read people vilify Nesta for not healing the same way, and not wanting to interact with the IC, or for distancing herself from her sisters. Like, it’s obvious she’s hurting, and I don’t even think she knows how to heal herself or knows what to do. People who are severely depressed don’t know how to get out of it, so calling her a bitch for not wanting their help is so tone deaf and narrow minded. No one is a terrible person for pushing people away. The girl has just literally become a shell of herself.
When people say Nesta stans are “glorifying abuse” because they like Nesta, it’s sad because they really just relate to Nesta’s depression. They relate to her feeling devoid of feeling, and relate to how she pushes those closest to her away because she doesn’t know how to deal with her pain. Most importantly, they saw all of the examples I listed when reading, and saw Nesta growing and evolving, and they want to see her become a better person. They want to see her fight and confront her own demons. 
It’s not about discarding her abusive behavior. It’s about confronting it and hoping she learns and grows from it.
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ziezie13 · 3 years
Text
how do I be out here looking this fuckin' fly
Also on AO3
“But Daaaaad! It’s not fair. Why do I have to wear a dress and the boys can wear whatever they want?” Lily wined.
“I’m sorry Lily, but the Nostradamus Prize has a very strict dress code. Your mother has to wear a dress too,” Harry replied.
“Actually, I think Lily might have a point with this one,” Albus piped up. “Seems kind of sexist to me.”
“Yes! Thank you, Al.”
Al shrugged and stuffed a cookie in his mouth.
“It may be sexist, but this event is important to your mother. Not many sports journalists have received this honour. And while it may be a noble cause, I don’t think you can dismantle the patriarchy in a single day.” Harry paused. “And no, that wasn’t a challenge.”
Lily pouted and James entered the kitchen. He pulled up a chair next to his brother and grabbed a cookie of his own.
“What’s going on?” He asked.
“Lily doesn’t want to wear a dress to the Nostradamus ceremony,” Albus replied.
“So don’t,” James said to his sister.
Lily glared at him, “The archaic, patriarchal dress code demands it.”
“That’s stupid.”
“Yes James, thank you. We have covered all this,” Harry said with a sigh. “Stupid as it may be, those are the rules and that’s that.”
“Whatever. Fine. Just don’t expect me to wear heels.” And with that Lily stormed off.
Lily continued to complain about the “dress thing” up until the day of the event. James and Albus were slumped on the couch together dressed in their suits and ties. While in the next room, Lily pleaded her case one last time to both their parents.
“You know what?” James said. “She’s right.”
“I know.”
“It’s just a bunch of stupid gender stereotype bullshit.”
“You’ll get no argument from me.”
James suddenly sat up. Albus eyed him warily.
“Whatever you are thinking right now, don’t.”
A huge grin appeared on James’ face.
“James no,” Albus insisted.
“You don’t even know what it is.”
“I know it can’t be good.”
“Ye of little faith.” James stood and bounded up the stairs. Albus followed.
Instead of turning in the hall towards his and Albus’ rooms, James went straight to Lily’s room and opened up her closet.
“Um, James?” Albus questioned unsure exactly what was happening.
James began to flip through Lily’s clothes till he reached the ones in the back. He pulled out a few dresses with the tags still on them. Their mum had bought them for Lily over the years but they had gone mostly unworn.
He loosed his tie and began shrugging off his suit jacket. Albus raised an eyebrow but didn’t comment, curious to see how this would play out.
James changed into a simple spaghetti strap one first using a couple of size charms to get it to fit. It felt strange and oddly freeing.
“What do you think?” He asked Albus twirling around a few times.
“You actually don’t look half-bad,” Albus said surprised.
That threw James for a loop. He had expected his brother to make fun of him and call him an idiot but Albus actually sounded sincere.
“You can’t wear that to the red carpet though. It’s a formal event and that dress is way too casual.”
James screwed up his face. “It’s a dress. How can it be casual?”
Rolling his eyes Albus walked over to the other dresses James had pulled out of the closet. “You’re absolutely hopeless.” Albus pulled out two dresses from the pile and handed one to his brother. “Here, try this one.”
Moments later both brothers were admiring their reflections in the mirror. James had dawned a floor-length light blue gown. The skirt had several layers of ruffles edged in black detailing and a layer of toile underneath that gave it some volume. Albus had on a simpler black silhouette that was no less elegant. The arms and bodice were made from a sheer fabric and detailed with black lace.
“You know,” James said, “I was just doing this to be a good brother and shit. Also, I thought it would be pretty funny, but ahh… I look good. I mean, bro… What the fuck? Who the fuck is this?” James examined his reflection from several different angles. “I mean obviously you look good, that’s a given, but how do I be out here looking this fuckin’ fly?”
Albus smiled at his brother’s antics, for once James was actually right. They did look good. An idea struck him and Albus began looking around the room. Locating James’ suit jacket he picked it up off the floor. “Put this on.”
James gave Albus a sceptical look.
“Just trust me.”
“Alright.” James took the jacket and put it on over the dress. He looked back at the mirror. “Oh, what the fuck? Muuum!”
James swung the door open with fervour and headed to the foyer screaming the entire way down. “Do you see me right now? Wwwwwwwwhat the fuck! Look how good I look, what the fuck?”
Harry and Ginny turned to see both their sons looking rather ravishing in a pair of Lily’s dresses. Lily stopped herself mid-rant. Her initial look of confusion was quickly replaced with a bright smile.
“How come you two pull off those dresses way better than I ever could?” She asked, arms crossed over her chest.
“I don’t know what to tell you Lils, it turns out I’m fuckin adorable so… Are we going to this thing or not?” James stood with a hand on his hip.
“You can’t wear that to the Nostradamus,” Harry said.
“Why not?” James asked defiantly.
“The dress code only says that women have to wear dresses. It doesn’t say that men can’t.” Albus added.
James gave him a proud look.
Harry looked for a moment like he wanted to argue but he was just too tired. “Sure, why not. It’s fine with me. Ginny?”
“You boys look lovely.”
“Thanks, Mum,” Albus said bashfully.
The Potter children were undisputedly the best dressed of the night. It became quite the controversy, and everyone seemed to have an opinion. The next morning the Quibbler printed a special fashion spread for the story calling attention to the Nostradamus’ outdated dress codes and quoting a young James Potter, “Our society has many backwards and outdated traditions that have slowly begun to decline in popularity after the war, but gender roles still persist. This is just one glimpse of that. No one should be told what they can or cannot wear, especially when they’re out there looking this fuckin’ fly.”
I had this idea a few days ago and it would not leave me alone so here I am at two in the morning. This is not what I thought it was going to be at all but I like it all the same, much like James LOL. And once James was in a dress Albus insisted he get one too so… sorry not sorry. The idea came to me after I couldn’t get this TikTok out of my head and then, at the last minute, I thought about Kristen Stewart at the 2018 Canned Film Festival. Also the dresses were inspired by Harry Styles who is now my new fashion icon. I blame @beedragony for enabling me. B has informed I am not allowed to blame them because they blamed me first so I guess this one is all on me.
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