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#In your best interest to allow me
bats100 · 1 year
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My deal for you
@staff​  I’d like to make an offer can I please buy the website tumbl.r.    I will pay you my grand offer of 41   $ .  Please tell me your response quickly if you agree.  Otherwise I may take extreme action 
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littledreamling · 1 year
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Stop Asking Neil Gaiman About Fanfiction Challenge 2022
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blujayonthewing · 3 months
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really fucking frustrating to be in a dry creative period where what I want is to be consuming and absorbing instead of creating, but I'm still only interested in dnd (can't happen without a bunch of adults syncing up their schedules, repeatedly and regularly) and my own OCs (the only content is content I CREATE AUUUGH)
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phoenixcatch7 · 10 months
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Every time I go to hyrule castle I remember that video about the royal guard weapons and how they were shiekah tech created to mimic the master sword (and failed - they're powerful but brittle and no more effective against the calamity than anything else). And I just remember the little detail of the wings on the hilt. On the master sword, they face up when the blade points down. On the royal guard weapons, they face up when the blade points up.
And to me, that little detail is very indicative of what they thought about the hero and the cycle.
The wings face up when fi is at rest. Waiting. Sealing. Not lifted.
For them, their swords face up when they brandish them, when they raise them against their enemies, when they wave them around and cheer.
That's what they think the hero does. That's what they think they can replicate and take for themselves.
That's not what a hero does at all.
Sure, he spends a lot of time doing that, but it's a fraction of the whole. The hero does not do it for glory or pay or fame. He is kind. He helps everyone who asks. He gets things for little kids and listens to their stories and helps people find their pets and goes out of his way to leave the stranger a little happier them when they met. He spends hours crawling through mazes and enemies to find something he can use later.
He does not raise his sword in anger. The job is not done once the villain of the day is skewered on his sword. It needs to be sealed, the darkness pushed back until the next generations can take up the call. It's passing on the torch to yourself. The master sword must seal evil during those intervening centuries.
The heroes soul is one, by breath of the wild, long forged in faith and love and determination and the flames of war and loss. The curse of demise makes it so that only one strong enough to stand against it can push it back. The heroes soul is one that is pure. It's a long reset game, and everyone knows the way it plays out.
And under rhoam, hyrule believes it knows all there is to know about the hero and the cycle. It thinks that it can shove the pieces where it wants them, that with the aid of the ancient technology it can force the warnings of history to bend to it's desire. It thinks enough violence will solve the problem entirely. It makes the master sword mimics with the blades facing up.
And it gets it wrong.
The hero reduced to a silent weapon, a shadow of the royal family, the princess helpless and unable to act, unable to access her own power.
It tries to force the issue with manpower and restrictions and piling societal pressure on the children, and hyrule falls.
Immediately, zelda is able to unlock and channel the full extent of her power, she can make a plan and not have it dismissed, she sends link to safety and travels hyrule setting the parts of a constantly moving puzzle into place, she meets ancient spirits and talks with the master sword and seals ganon on her own for the century it takes for link to return.
When he does, rhoam does not order link to save the princess. He does not pile titles and restrictions and pressures on him. He asks him to save his daughter. The hero finally gets to act at his own pace, and he chooses kindness. He chooses to go out of his way to talk to people outside his station, to listen to kids stories and leave strangers a little happier than when they met. He gathers allies loyal out of trust and not forced respect for things he hasn't done yet.
By choosing kindness and not violence (though there is an incredible amount of both), link becomes able to defeat the calamity and save zelda and the kingdom. Zelda is able to guide him and trust him to come. By working together as respected equals, they save the world.
And afterwards, the master sword is returned to her pedestal, triumphant, blade down and wings raised high.
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saw5 · 26 days
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as someone who can be quite unempathetic and involuntarily emotionally shielded from matters of tragedy and injustice sometimes (but still, obviously, recognizes his own responsibility as a moral actor regardless of how he feels that day and does his best to act in accordance with carefully considered values at all times) it really bugs me when people r like "having less empathy can make you more logical about things" no it fuckin doesn't ............... Believe me no it fuckin doesn't
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frecklydork · 2 years
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ok I know it’s monday after 1pm and nobody is online but I wanna talk about meeting Steve Blum 🥺🥺🥺
Me and my friend waited in line for three hours, maybe four? He motioned for me to come forward when it was my turn and I pointed at myself to make sure he actually meant me, and he kind of laughed and said “yes you!! It’s okay, come here” And once I approached him I started shaking just like I knew would happen, I had no words :’) He was so patient though, he said “hi” and I said “hi” and he said “hi” and I said “hi” and he laughed again and said “how are you doing today?” And I was like “I’m!! I’m well!! How are you? Are you tired?” He said “I’m good, but yeah I’m really sleepy. But it’s worth it! we made it to sunday!!! yaaay!!” he seemed so cheerful for someone who barely slept within 4 days, stood and socialized in such an overcrowded setting for 10 hours each day, living on those little 8-hour energy drinks (kind of like retail ig)
I handed him the envelope after he confirmed he accepts gifts, and he said “oh my goodness, look how beautiful this is! look at how much time you spent on this -- this is so lovely, I can’t wait to open it!! this is amazing!! I can’t wait to get home and play with this, thank you!!” and the envelope drawings weren’t even special, they were little star and heart shapes because duh it’s ME and i also put some starscream and heatwave stickers on there hehe/// but he was acting like it was so pretty, it was very sweet of him to do that
And I actually planned to give him just one of the charms separately, just to see his reaction. I chose the Steve charm bc I think it’s the cutest one + I don’t know if he often gets fanart of. like. himself? So I handed it to him, and he didn’t even have to pull it out of the bag to recognize it, he immediately says “oh my god that’s me!! oh my god that’s me!!!” and he’s holding the thing so carefully while studying it. “this is amazing, oh my god. you made this? you MADE this?? that’s... amazing” and he reads my full name I wrote on the back and says “Keri... Keri... I recognize your name... on cameos, right?” He pauses. “My little starflower, is that you??”
I was in SHOCK?? I didn’t think he’d actually?? recognize my name let alone remember the starflower thing?? and I lost my words again so I just nodded a lot, and his eyes WIDEN and he leans forward and says “wait really?! THAT WAS YOU?” and I nodded again, and squeaked “you? remember??” and he insists “yes! I remember! I remember!! my starflower from cameos!!” and he starts laughing in disbelief, shaking his head while saying “I can’t believe I’m meeting you! my little starflower, yes of course I remember you!!” and he slipped into the starscream voice and said SO fondly “my little starflower keri...” (made me GASP) “of course I would remember my starflower, of course I do, my little starflower Keri...” and I melted. I fucking MELTED and he just kept laughing and repeating (in his normal speaking voice) “wow, it’s you!! of course I’d remember that! my starflower! it’s you!!”
and I told him that the gift package was my way of trying to repay him for all the cameos, even though there isn’t hardly enough in there, I wanted to give him *something* because “you saved my life” and I wasn’t going into details abt that part but he looked rly touched and said “awww... alright, hold on, I HAVE to hug you!” AND I’M LIKE. WAIT WHAT REALLY? FOR REAL? I didn’t have any time to even open my mouth after he said that bc NO HESITATION, DUDE DROPS EVERYTHING AND *CLIMBS OUT OF HIS LITTLE BOOTH AREA* and immediately wraps his arms around me and hugged me so tight 🥺🥺 and he leans into my ear and says “you’re amazing. this is the reason why I love my job. you’re so amazing, don’t forget that, okay Keri? you’re wonderful. you’re incredible, okay? I’m honored to meet you, you’re amazing” and he kept repeating a bunch of compliments, I don’t remember half of them because I was like, barely processing what was happening and thinking holy shit I can’t believe this is actually going so well and then when he pulled away he said “okay I’m gonna sign something for you!”
So he pulls out a Starscream print and slips into the stsc voice again “to my Starflower, yes? yes...” and while we watched him write, I was completely mesmerized and gripping onto my friend’s arm for dear life. she doesn’t even know steve or any of his shows but she came all this way with me and stayed in the line with me and made SURE to take photos and record some audio and did everything to make sure we’d get in line today (she’s amazing and i fucking love her) & steve wrote “Keri... thank you for being my little Starflower. love, Starscream (and steve)” which reminded me of the one time he said in a cameo in his stsc voice sooo gently “thank you for loving me” like it just. oogghgh made me melt. and then he said “honestly, with you, Starscream is probably the nicest he’s ever been” and I was just in complete awe this whole time, I couldn’t believe he was actively encouraging my silly selfship shit to this level. I really just expected him to say “oh, cool, sure, ok here’s your print” and for the line to keep moving. all of this was so unexpected. so I said “this evil alien robot killed someone not even 5 minutes into the first episode, and you make him so nice to me, and I appreciate it so much” and he said “aww! hey, absolutely, it’s always my choice! and of course he’d be nice to you, you’re his starflower aren’t you??” GODDDDDD
and I thought we’d be done, but he suddenly calls for his agent (gwen. i love her. love gwen, absolute queen), and shows her the Steve charm and says “gwen look! look at this, oh my god. look how amazing this is!! isn’t this incredible? she DREW this, can you believe that? Keri, you even put my tattoo on there!! that’s my tattoo! the attention to detail!! I’m definitely gonna take this home, I’m keeping this on my desk forever! I love this so much, are you kidding me? I am never letting this go!”
And Gwen says “oh my god, that’s SO CUTE!!! Keri, did you make this? you MADE all of these charms?” (im assuming she opened the envelope to check inside for safety reasons, I think it’s part of her job) then she asks “do you post more artwork anywhere like instagram? you should tag us, we’ll share it!!” and steve turns, drops his markers and chimes loudly “YES WE WILL SHARE IT this is DEFINITELY going online” and she goes on for like a full minute telling me to share my artwork with steve nodding encouragingly adding a little “yes!” “absolutely!” “yes!!” every five seconds while I’m still shaking like a leaf. I looked AND sounded absolutely ridiculous w/ my dumb high pitched voice, barely remembering to nod my head and to breathe, couldn’t believe he’s talked to me this long, couldn’t believe he’s THIS enthusiastic, couldn’t believe he likes my art THIS MUCH when I was so sure he wouldn’t want anything to do with me, couldn’t believe his wholeass agent is compliment my art and saying she’d want to share it??? like literally everything went Best Case Scenario, this was way more than I could have dreamed. insane. AND WE’RE NOT EVEN DONE YET--
he opens the envelope to put the charm inside and says “I’m NOT losing THIS” and then he peaks further into the package and says “oooohh there’s all KINDS of goodies in here!!! thank you so much, I’m going to have so much fun getting to look at all of these!!” and Gwen holds up the blue star bag that I put the Steve charm in, and she says “this is my favorite!! star is my middle name, blue is my favorite color, and I looove sparkly things” and I said “you are literally the coolest human being alive” and she laughs “you are so funny!!” and Steve hugged her and said “I’ll give you the star bag Gwen!” and she said “there’s more in here with all kinds of sparkles!” and he says “ooooh, sounds like something Keri would do” SDLKJFHKLDF
and then we took a pic and then he asked if I wanted a short little video, and if I wanted to be IN the video with him, or if I just wanted it to be him only. I really didn’t want to be in it bc I already hated hearing myself talk but I said “oh whatever you’re comfortable with” and he said “well come here, you can’t have Starlight without his Starflower! I’ll ask you some questions and you answer them with me okay?” 😭💕 so he pulls me into the recording w/ my friend’s phone and he said “Keri, Keri, my little starflower... did you drink your energon today?” and I said why yes Starlight I certainly did and he replies “mm, yes, I can tell, you are looking exceptionally powerful!” and he did such a cute evil laugh and it took all of my guts to keep quiet bc my reaction every time he laughs is “awwwWWWW” but I didn’t wanna mess up the video w/ my dumb voice. and he added “Oh, don’t tell Megatron about this though, he’d be sooo jealous I get to talk to you...” like omfg dude is out here confirming that Megatron is so down bad in the megakeri relationship and he has no idea 😂
and the rest is kind of foggy bc I was barely processing half of this, so nervous abt my own behavior, in absolute shock that he was like, leaning so close and making eye contact the entire interaction to make sure that he knows that I had his full attention. he was so patient and never cut me off, even tho I was talking so fast bc I was sooo anxious but he was so so so kind the entire time... and then out of nowhere he pulls me into ANOTHER HUG 🥺🥺 and thanks me again saying “please take care, starflower. you really are an incredible artist” 😭😭😭
and after all of that, I was just. glowing. walking in a complete daze. i couldn’t even hear the crowd, ppl were bumping into me bc it was like a SEA of people at this convention, but it was just a buzzing sound to me bc all I could think about was the signed print in my hands and all the memories that come with it now... I didn’t expect him to remember me, let alone get so excited and? hug me? give me all these memorable things? say such nice things??? insist that he wanted to keep my artwork? promised he would do everything to make sure it got home safe? god. I also said at the very end “hey if you ever find an alternate to cameo... I will give you all of my money” and he laughed and said “nooo I don’t want your money, I don’t do this for money!” and there wasn’t any further comment abt cameo and I was like ok the line is moving I gotta GO go. so it’s unlikely he will ever find a cameo alternate, but like... I have over a dozen of his cameos already I get to cherish, +1 cameo we did ~together~ + all of those nice compliments. I’m just... still in shock... ok thank u to anyone who took the time to read this ❤
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bluesadansey · 10 months
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#listen I think I have a right to experience A Lot of annoyance over all this because I had to see ‘criticisms’ like that so often#this is a particularly hilarious one the same level as the people complaining about Daisy and Billy being the only ones on the Aurora cover#(there are changes with the shoot but them being the only two on the cover is the same as in the book lmao ya’ll can not read apparently#‘it’s an insult to the message of the book because it’s supposed to be the whole band on the cover and not just the Billy and Daisy show uw#you are talking about the scene in the book where the entire band in interview is mad/bitter about how they ended up going with only DB#on the cover even years later while Daisy and Billy in their interviews gush over how gorgeous and iconic the cover featuring just them is#like … ya’ll are conflating a general sentiment those chars were allowed to express with what the actual scene was grrr#it’s one of the best funniest parts of the book too like I love that part…#and if the complaint was ‘I’m sad the other interviews weren’t as extensive at that part in the show’ totally would be valid crit to me#I would have liked them to show everyone reacting in interviews too (they did show them esp Eddie be unhappy about it but#your right there wasn’t as much specific exploration in the show of how the side chars were effected. But they’re still side chars with sid#plots in the book lol#also only Karen actually deserves to be explored as a char the rest I’m more than fine with getting less and then instead investing far mor#in developing Simone’s plot and arc.)#there’s stuff with Graham I do think could have been useful/worth while thematically if they’d had the 13eps and could do it all (and I’m a#Graham hater xd) but I certainly wouldn’t prioritize it over the things the show did focus on#and it’s not remotely high on my list of things they didn’t focus on as much as I wanted. ofc#in fact like I said… I thought it was so funny they did not gaf about the Dunne brothers relationship 😭#like it is an interesting dynamic in the book there are good scenes. but I’m obsessed with their choice to not give anything to any of#Billy’s dynamics that aren’t the love triangle points and Teddy. respectable af#vs Daisy and to a lesser extent Camila both have way more developed dynamics outside of him incred#(another reason ‘they made Daisy and Camila center around Billy’ crit makes me roll my eyes#like in the sense that the love triangle is elevated in terms of focus sure. and people are free to have qualms about that choice#basically saying the show prioritized the romance for the characters and char work is accurate. saying they did that more for the girls and#less for Billy idk what show you were watching
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lehhoh7822 · 4 months
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things are so strange over here
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carbonatedcacti · 7 months
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honestly pretty crazy how much better your life gets when you dont have any toxic or harmful people in it. im less stressed right now than ive been in like a year even though i have school deadlines to worry about. insane
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phe-purple-parade · 2 years
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Just remembered when my hs lit studies class read Hamlet (that class was so fun, always had a laugh with those guys) and we chose roles 'cause we wanted to like act it out during readings (resulting in some hilarious moments, like when I had to drag my classmate 'off stage' after mime-stabbing him through a blanket another classmate held up)
Anyway I read for Hamlet because that's so gender (and no one else really wanted to lol) and I lowkey liked the girl who happened to be reading for Horatio (it wasn't a crush but I uhhh yk thought she looked good n was cool like she read Jane Austen and did her research project on how Audrey Hepburn influenced fashion n stuff and just,, I think if she had ever asked me out I wouldn't've declined but ultimately it was aesthetic attraction more than anything else. And she was v likely straight)
And so I couldn't really suggest that like,, Hamlet and Horatio are perhaps gay for eo or anything 'cause I wouldn't've wanted to make her uncomfortable or anything
Earlier that year almost our entire class agreed that Dorian and Basil from The Picture of Dorian Gray were gay and she was legit like 'oh, I didn't think of that' like this girl was surprised?? We're all here either outright saying 'they're gay harold' or generally agreeing but she just,, did not consider the gay subtext afjahdkfkl (our teacher was trying to palm it off with an alternative interpretation and like yeah screw amatonormativity and all but,, the context, man. Oscar 'The Homosexual' Wilde was definitely queercoding his characters during the repressed as hell Victorian era ok?? But this was a Christian school so.. but like. Legit one of the classmates I sat with wrote a Dorian x Basil fixitfic I can't). And I basically ended up saying to her 'your interpretation is totally valid.. but you're wrong' nOT THAT I MEANT TO SAY IT LIKE THAT BUT IT KINDA CAME OUT THAT WAY AND EVERYONE REACTED LIKE I'D SPAT A SICK BURN OOF NO GUYS I'M JUST NEURODIVERGENT
So yeah while I wished I was cool n confident enough, there was no way I could've made a flirty joke about Hamlet and Horatio with this girl (even tho I generally wanted to point it out)
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westernsunshine · 1 month
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The overall concept of kids bringing their phones to school BAFFLES me tbh. Like what do you mean 10 year olds have phones? What do you mean they’re allowed to bring them to school???
#i got my first phone when i was 9 but it was literally only because i was going on a trip with my grandparents#my parents wanted a way to keep in touch with us and neither of my grandparents were interested in owning a phone at that time#(my granddad has one now but my grandma hates them with a passion. she doesn’t even like having a landline. she’s so based for that tbh)#anyway. it was a nokia brick and i LOVED it; i thought it was the best because it lit up at the sides and i could take tiny photos#i had about 10 numbers. whenever i got a new person’s number i would text them incessantly#i still was not allowed to take it to school and i wouldn’t have even WANTED to considering 1) what would i have been able to do with it?#we weren’t allowed to text or call people in class and that was really all my phone could do lol#and 2) it would’ve got stolen#tbh i never brought anything nice with me to school because it WOULD’VE got stolen. in the time i was there i had a coat; a bag#and two pencil cases stolen. oh and my watch but whoever stole it dropped it and a teacher found it#NONE of this stuff was as valuable as a phone. i got my pencil cases for £3 maximum at whsmith#so i am absolutely bamboozled at the concept of kids bringing SMARTPHONES to school. like what do you mean you as a parent are buying#something for your kid that costs hundreds of pounds and then LETTING THEM GO TO SCHOOL WITH IT???#‘oh they need to be able to get in touch with me and i need to be able to get in touch with them—‘ call the receptionist’s office#like a normal person!!! sorry but anyone who’s a parent of a school age kid… well most of us anyway. we’re old enough to remember LANDLINES#we’re old enough to know the concept that if someone is at a building; such as a school or workplace; that building has a LANDLINE PHONE#maybe several. and also: if your kid has gone MISSING from school then you need to call the police#that’s it!! if your kid needs you they need to go to school reception. if you need your kid you need to go to or call school reception#i’m sorry i’m not seeing why everyone needs a phone at school. the only thing i can think is if your bus/transport ticket or pass#is on there. even then - it should be in your bag & switched off throughout classes#tbh even at break time - socialise with people?? like by all means check your notifications quickly but you don’t need to be ON your phone#not at break and defffinitely not in class#i had a smartphone all through college and university and i never used it in class. like. i don’t get why people seem to think it’s okay#personal
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leatherbookmark · 3 months
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sometimes i lie awake at night thinking god i sure hope wsn are fucking because it would be SUCH boring and uncreative writing if they went on to have wives and 2.5 children. and then i'm like hm wait but wsn are. and then i'm like hm no i'm right
#shrimp thoughts#it's like. the fascinating but depressing shounen manga cliche that you can have someone who's one half of your soul. who's been through#countless perils with you and understands you like no one else in the world does. AND you have a wife and mother of your children.#and these are separate categories. you are not allowed (being a shounen manga character) to end up in a romantic relationship with#your best friend/rival. and similarly the woman who later becomes your wife cannot be your best friend/rival either because 'friend' and#'woman one is attracted to' are separate categories. furthermore you GOTTA use the terribly annoying 'adolescent attraction' tropes#that create a barrier between the protagonist and his love interest that cannot ever be crossed. her body is mysterious and fascinating; sh#is from Another Species and her behaviour is Confusing.#this is sort of why i enjoyed almond on a basic 'yeah it was nice okay' sense but hated the introduction of a female crush#both as the element of a coming-of-age story (and also a 'look our protagonist is WEIRD but he IS normal and relatable in that he experienc#*-s heterosexual desire!) AND a wedge between the protagonist and his friend. i understand why the author did it i guess but it doesn't#change the fact that it disappointed and bored me terribly.#why am i talking about tropes in relation to rps which is based on people existing in real life? well you see i have a cold and overdosed o#sore throad lozenges then woke up shortly before 5am salivating with gay abandon. you WILL suffer my demented takes.
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sick as hell of the white parent
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eff-plays · 7 months
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Ok so I watched the interview with Stephen Rooney, Astarion's writer, and here are some highlights. (I'm an aspiring writer and current game design student who wants to write for games so I'm sorry if some of these insights aren't as interesting to you as they are to me <3)
He calls Astarion his "horrible little vampire boy"
He loves seeing the fandom around Astarion<3
He did write other characters in the game, but mostly NPCs surrounding Astarion or his storyline, so it mostly revolved around Astarion
Astarion is not as connected to other companions/Origins as, for example, Lae'zel and Shadowheart, or Wyll and Karlach are to each other, but he is still reactive to their stories, even if it's just to stand off to the side and laugh when something terrible happens
He had a clear sense of where Astarion's story would start and end, but it got "muddy in the middle", but those are also moments where the best ideas come from
They write from the general idea that every character has one "good" and one "evil" ending, in order to give the player choice. RIP Ascendant apologists :(
According to Stephen, two of the most important aspects of Astarion's character (to keep consistent when bringing him to Idle Champions, at least) is that he enjoys violence, but is also fun about it
"He has a certain appreciation for violence, I guess? A bit of a murdery streak. [...] He's a vampire, he's all about blood, and he's all about, kind of, those darker sides of humanity. [..] But at the same time, he is ... He is really fun, he's really fun to write, he's really fun to have in your party, and it's very important for me that that is also represented."
"He's gonna stab you, but will have a smile on his face as he does it? I mean, I dunno. That's kind of him in a nutshell."
Larian would not have allowed for Astarion to be a typical brooding Dracula type, and there were scenes that were shot down for not being original enough
The main thing about Astarion was trying to get a "sense of fun." It would be easy to write a character that was very unlikable, and they absolutely did not want to do that
Rooney says Astarion is consistently terrible throughout the game and awful in a whole lot of ways, but he also needed to be charming enough that you could tolerate his presence and wanted him around
Rooney also had a lot of input on Astarion's stats (meaning the 10 Charisma is probalby 100% intentional)
He also had input on how certain lines should be delivered, even though the writers didn't directly work with voice actors
The way Astarion moves and poses is "all Neil"
Apparently, Neil Newbon worked on the character for years and Rooney did not speak to him once, though his voice work did influence how Astarion's lines were written and it became a "feedback loop" (Possible context for "ONLY SLIGHTLY, NEIL")
There were no points where a line delivery drastically changed Astarion's writing; rather it was a constant, slow evolution
However, there was one very spoilery moment where Neil gave such emotion to some "basic" lines that it fundamentally changed the scene (WHAT IS IT OMG)
It's difficult to balance approval, as you don't want to straight up write a monster. Every character needs to have some humanity in them. So if it comes to leaving the party, it needed to be the result of something central to said character. They wanted to be mindful of situations that would cause actual rifts between characters. (I assume this is why most generic disapprovals/approvals are +/- 1 or 2, while character-related ones give +/-5 or more)
However, as they don't write straight up horrible people/monsters, it doesn't come up as often as one might think.
The interviewer makes a point about how characters like Astarion and Lae'zel are good examples of how to play "evil" characters, as they are maybe not the best people but are still eager and willing to stick around the other party members
They worked to make sure the characters would work as a group, no matter the configuration of the group. The characters needed to be on the same path, even if they don't always agree or walk that path the same way.
Stephen Rooney is very proud of the "climactic" scene of Astarion's story. (AS HE SHOULD BE.) He even had to step away from the computer and have an emotional moment. Me too, man.
He's also "extremely pleased" that there's a point where you can punch Astarion in the face. "Actually, that one might be my favorite part" A MAN OF THE PEOPLE!!
Stephen Rooney's tip on what specific thing you should try out with Astarion: When he's trying to get a "sneaky nibble" at night, you should "probably" let him bite you. Way ahead of you there, sir.
No discussion about Astarion's romance unfortunately, but that's that!
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sttoru · 6 days
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·.⌇ 𝐒𝐘𝐍𝐎𝐏𝐒𝐈𝐒. you leave megumi with your husband so you can make them breakfast. you quickly realise that that might have backfired.
wc. around 1.3k
tags. dad!toji x wife!female reader. fluff. reader gets called ‘mama’ by both toji & megumi. half beta read.
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“ow, careful there, brat.”
your husband’s deep voice echoes from within the bathroom. you’ve left megumi in his care this morning so you’d be able to make breakfast in peace. toji was all grumpy about it, since he had to wake up early when he had no work, but eventually agreed to your proposal.
you hum your favorite song while frying eggs. the sizzling in the pan did help avert your attention from toji’s grunts of annoyance somewhere in the distance, though only for a couple seconds. your hear your child’s laughter slip between the noises of aggravation. it piques your interest.
“one more time and i’m putting y’r ass in time out,” toji’s deep voice sounds muffled. he sounds rather serious about whatever is bothering him.
you turn the stove off and walk towards the hallway, standing at the doorframe as you look in the direction of the bathroom. you tilt your head and try your best to pick up on snippets of the conversation between your husband and son.
the sound of bottles dropping on the floor is the first thing that allows you to guess that megumi’s acting up. you know how mischievous your little toddler can get, especially at his age. toji isn’t one to gentle parent his kid—he tries to, of course, but sometimes he can’t help but be a bit rough.
“megumi fushiguro.”
you raise your eyebrows as toji uses your child’s full name. he rarely does, only when he’s really upset or about to lose his marbles. you decide to see what was going on for yourself. you walk towards the bathroom, cleaning your hands against the material of your apron. you knock once before pushing the door open.
you stick your head through the little gap, ready to identify the cause of the commotion. the first thing you notice is the chaos on the floor; bottles, tubes, toothbrushes, and all other kinds of products lay cluttered on the bathroom tiles.
your eyes then land on your husband’s broad and scarred back, “hey, honey. did something hap—”
your voice trails off once toji turns around, revealing the jaw dropping scene. nearly his entire face is covered in loads of shaving cream and even his black hair hasn’t escaped the soft foam.
the bathroom counter is completely wet, and the water runs down the edges in small drops. the culprit of this entire scene is sitting right on that same counter, clapping his dirty hands together that were smeared with toji’s shaving cream.
you blink and walk towards the two. you can’t possibly be mad at the sight, finding toji’s situation more funny than worrisome. You try to act serious and clear your throat, “uh, yeah. so what’s happened here?”
your husband rolls his eyes and nods his head at the little boy in front of him, who’s giggling and kicking his legs. toji tries to wipe the shaving cream from his nose, attempting to get it out of his hair as well, “i tried to be a good dad and include him in my morning routine, that’s what.”
the man clicks his tongue as he now realises how dumb of a mistake that was, “gave him the opportunity to put some shaving foam on my jaw ‘n the brat totally blew it. started attackin’ me with the stuff.”
toji grumbles. he wipes away the foam that got on the mirror afterwards. it’s nearly gotten everywhere. he lightly nudges megumi’s forehead with a scoff, “never again, y’hear? the little shit can’t sit still for even one second.”
that explains the stuff on the floor. you know that megumi could grow bored easily if he isn’t the centre of attention. he’d start doing anything to be the focus of his parents. toji probably didn’t pay him much mind, wanting to get his morning routine over with.
“language, honey.” you sigh and look down at megumi who’s still reaching his messy hands up to his dad.
toji huffs and leans back, not giving the little boy a chance to put more shaving cream on his face. he’s learnt his lesson; kids do not understand it when you tell them to ‘only put a little bit’.
megumi whines and threatens to throw a tantrum. you notice that immediately and try to keep his mind off things by picking him up. you turn on the faucet and try to wash his little hands, “c’mon. give mama your hands.”
the little boy shakes his head furiously, squirming in your embrace in attempt to get away. you sigh and grab his little wrists gently. you lower him to the sink, trying your best to wash away the shaving cream as the first step of solving this grande mess.
“no, mama!” megumi is stubborn as he voices his complains. toji watches from a distance whilst he struggles to clean the overload of shaving cream from his face.
you make the mistake of letting go of your child’s wrists to grab a washcloth. megumi takes his chance and pats his messy hands against your face, leaving you no space to process what he’s doing.
your mind takes a second before you realise what’s happening, “hey! quit it, ‘gumi.”
you try to grab ahold of megumi’s tiny hands again, but they move too fast for you. plus, he’s pretty skilled at avoiding yours. you can feel the foam slowly cover your entire face; from your jaw and cheeks, to your nose and forehead.
it was inevitable at this point.
“toji, do something,” you grunt and struggle to contain the energetic toddler in your arms. you take a peek at your husband and find him grinning at the predicament you’ve gotten yourself in.
toji simply shrugs and enjoys the fact that you’re experiencing exactly what he had experienced just moments ago. seeing you struggle to contain your disobedient child only proves that his parenting skills are not the problem in this situation, your toddler is.
“ye did that to y’rself, mama.” toji hums in amusement. he leans against the wall, the blue towel now loosely hanging off head after he’s given up on getting the foam out of his hair, “now y’know what i’m talkin’ about. he’s a lil’ monster.”
megumi squeals in victory after he’s gotten both his parents covered in shaving cream. you want to say something to your child, but you’re at a loss for words. even now, you cannot bring yourself to be mad at him. he’s just a kid who’s having fun with his parents.
“i made mama pretty! hehe.” megumi grins and encourages you to look in the mirror. he points at your reflection and awaits the words of confirmation. his blue eyes look up at you, nearly sparkling with joy, admiring how pretty he’s made you look with that white foam all over your face.
toji joins in on the fun. he comes to stand behind you, looking at you through the mirror. he snickers, already forgotten about his irritations that occurred in the first place. he nods in approval at megumi’s words, “gotta agree, son. y’r mama looks much prettier like this.”
your husband’s teasing comment adds fuel to the fire. though again, you cannot bring yourself to be upset at the situation.
you look at the reflection in the dirty mirror. you all may appear disheveled due to the foamy mess on your bodies—and yet even at that moment—the only thing you actually manage to see is a happy family of three.
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Text
Infernal Shadows
Synopsis: Being one of the most powerful overlords in Hell, you like to keep up with colonies and overlord plans. Recently with the new extermination date out, you hold your annual gala sooner than usual. You hadn’t expected to get in the middle of the already heated feud between the Radio Demon and the head of Vox Tech.
Warnings: She/Her pronouns used for the reader, mentions of blood, voodoo?, Angel Dust being a horn-bag, Reader is referred too as Madame to the public. Vox and Alastor feud because I live for it.
Song for this chapter: The world we knew by Frank Sinatra.
A/N: I wanna make this a three part short story, so if anyone is interested in being tagged in the second part just let me know!! I hope you enjoy!!
Word count: 2655
Navigation!! // Masterlist!!! // Serendipity Writes (event) // Part two
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Getting an invite to the annual crimson ball, hosted by yours truly, was nothing but an honor. Every overlord and every sinner in the pride ring waited anxiously for a letter. A black card with white letter in a cursive font stating ‘You have been personally invited by Hells biggest designer. The list of the gala was simple. The usual overlords, Zestial, Carmilla Carmine and her daughters, Zeezie, Rosie, Fredrick Von Eldritch and Bethesda von Eldritch. Alastor who had came back after seven years of hiding god knows where, and by special request, the three vee’s who had never attended the gala before. Then it becomes a bit more political.
Next on the list was the Goetia family, inviting the recently divorced prince with his daughter. Inviting Lucifer and Lilith, though they only ever came when everyone was gone. Then was their daughter Charlotte, who got a plus one as a special perk of being the princess of hell. Husk because he had been an old friend of yours before his status of Overlord was taken from him by none other than Alastor. He was also given a plus one, though he usually never brought anyone extra. Sir Pentious was a candidate, but ultimately scrapped from your list of invites as you felt he was too childish.
The gala was tonight and everything was going smoothly. Preparations were almost done, the foyer was spotless just the way you liked it, and everything seemed to be falling into place. You stared at yourself in the mirror. You had spent months designing your perfect dress for tonight. Everyone attending the gala knew there was only ever one color off limits, because you always wore it best. The color black always suited you perfectly. No one could wear it better than you.
Back at the hotel, Charlie felt guilty for using her authority as princess to have people help her get ready for this gala. Based on what Alastor had told her, there would be a lot of political powers and fellow overlords there. She wanted to look her best if she was going to pitch the hotel to them. She needed more people on board with the project, maybe someone who didn’t think it was complete and utterly ridiculous joke like Alastor did.
“How do I look?” Charlie asked as the makeup and hair artists stepped away from her. Charlie stepped out, allowing Vaggie to get a better look at her in a tailored charcoal gray suit, a departure from her usual vibrant red attire. The jacket, adorned with subtle pinstripes, accentuated her frame, while the crisp, white silk shirt underneath added a touch of formality. Completing the ensemble, she wore a black tie with a discreet pattern that hinted at both elegance and authority. The ensemble was a strategic choice, projecting confidence and a readiness to engage with the political powers present at the gala for the sake of her hotel. Vaggie smiled and hugged Charlie deeply, their embrace making Charlie feel a little less nervous about the whole ordeal.
“Charlie you look amazing. What happened to the red?” Vaggie asked, before Charlie just chuckled.
“Well, I wanted a change for tonight. I’m always in red, and I feel like they’ll take me more serious if I’m not walking in there with my usual attire. Besides, you read the invitation, ‘formal attire, look your best’.” Charlie said. Vaggie nodded, and Charlie pulled back from the hug to admire Vaggie in her dress. She was wearing a sleek and modern grey dress that gracefully embraced the formal occasion. The dress, with its tailored fit and subtle shimmer, exuded class. The knee-length hemline added a contemporary touch, and Vaggie had decided to pair it with black heels to complete the ensemble. The choice of grey complemented Charlie’s charcoal gray suit, creating a coordinated yet distinct look that would surely make an impression at the gala. Charlie felt her cheeks heat up taking in her appearance, her long hair gently pinned back, the loose pieces of hair framing her face.
“Aww, Vaggie you look so pretty!!” Charlie said excitedly. Vaggie just smiled, ignoring the way her cheeks heated up at Charlies compliment.
“I agree, you look good vagina.” Angel said mockingly, causing Vaggie to glare at him. Charlie just gushed.
“Angel be nice. This is really important for the hotel.” Charlie explained. He just nodded, tilting his head back and downing a bottle of liquor. The staff however was interrupted by Angel making a purring sound at Husk, who was dressed in a nice white suave dinner jacket, with perfect cutouts for his wings, along with some sleek black trousers and some black dress shoes. The match, he had a black silk lapel.
“I can think of another place that suit would look.” Angel said, leaning onto Husk. He rolls his eyes, bottle in hand.
“Do I even wanna know?” He asks, and Angel just grins.
“On my bedroom floo-“ Angel doesn’t get to finish, being shrugged off by Husk who just walks away with a shake of his head.
“Oh my gosh! Husk you look amazing!” Charlie squealed in delight. Husk just smiled softly before setting his drink on the bar counter.
“It appears everyone is ready.” Alastor said, the focus of the room shifting to him. Niffty was at his side studying his outfit from head to toe.
Alastor emerged in an ensemble that deviated from his usual eccentricity, opting for a more formal yet captivating look. A deep red velvet tailcoat adorned his frame, its luxurious texture catching the light. Dark-red lapels, meticulously piped with gold, added a touch of opulence. Underneath, he wore a perfectly tailored crimson dress shirt, the power emitting off of him. Suddenly, the room grew just a tad bit darker, the shadows of the room stretching just a bit. Complementing the ensemble, he chose a pair of well-fitted black dress pants, allowing the bold red hue to take center stage on his appearance. His choice of footwear shifted to polished black oxford shoes, a departure from his usual pointed-toe boots. The finishing touches of the outfit included a matching red silk bowtie, neatly knotted at his throat, and black leather gloves that added a refined edge. Alastor’s presence was commanding, radiating an air of formality while retaining the distinctive charm that defined him. The room was captivated by the Radio Demon’s unexpected transformation into a vision of refined class and style.
“You took forever for that?” Niffty said, before Angel Dust tossed a pillow at her.
“Shut it you. We, we are keeping,” Angel said, hands waving around Alastor, “to whatever this is.”
“Style.” Alastor said confidently. Vaggie just face palmed while Charlie clapped her hands together excitedly.
“Okay, I think everyone’s ready. Should we head out?” Charlie asked. Vaggie nodded, before Alastor dug the invitation out of his coat pocket. Standing near a wall, he traced the symbol on the back of the card on the wall. “Uh, Al? What are you doing?” Charlie asked. He grinned, putting his hand flat on the wall. The symbol began to glow green, before it opened a portal. On the other side, was a large house. The grand Victorian mansion stood as a testament to opulence, its imposing facade adorned with intricate wrought-iron black railings and embellished balconies with hints of chains. Tall, arched windows with stained glass panels framed the exterior, allowing glimpses of the soft glow emanating from within. The entrance, marked by a sweeping staircase, welcomed guests with ornate, carved intricate detailed doors. Charlie, Vaggie and Husk followed Alastor through the portal, Charlie waving goodbye to Niffty, and Angel. Sir Pentious was most likely hiding out in a room somewhere with his egg boys.
As guests approached, they marveled at the meticulous details of the architecture – elaborate moldings, corbels, and friezes adorned every corner. Ivy-clad walls added a touch of nature’s grace, intertwining with wrought-iron lampposts that cast a warm ambiance over the meticulously landscaped gardens.Inside, the grand foyer unfolded, revealing a sweeping staircase adorned with a rich, mahogany handrail. Crystal chandeliers hung from soaring ceilings, their light refracted by ornate mirrors that lined the walls. Plush Victorian-era furnishings, upholstered in rich fabrics, adorned the parlor rooms, creating intimate spaces for guests to gather and converse.Every room whispered of a bygone era – intricately patterned wallpaper, gilded frames displaying classical art, and the faint fragrance of aged wood and lavender.
The air was infused with a sense of refinement, transporting guests to a time when elegance reigned supreme. The Victorian mansion, a splendid backdrop for the gala, promised an evening steeped in grandeur and charm. In the middle of the exterior grounds, a grand fountain of blood took center stage. Its sculpted marble figures spouted blood into the air, catching the moonlight in a dance of liquid elegance. The fountain, surrounded by manicured gardens and flowering shrubs, became a focal point for guests as they strolled through the outdoor spaces, the gentle sound of cascading blood adding a serene touch to the gala’s errie atmosphere.
The overlords arrival made the event much more real. Alastor hums to himself as he walks around the outside grounds. There are servants of all kinds walking around with glasses of champagne. Rosie is sitting on a bench, plucking thorns off a rose. Alastor smiles to himself, happy to see a familiar face he know he can confide in.
“Rosie dear! So nice to see you.” Alastor said with a smile. She smiles at him, teeth razor sharp.
“Do you think you’ll be getting a seat tonight?” She asks, snapping the rose off its stem and tossing it to the side.
“Well of course I will. It’d be a mistake if I wasn’t.” Alastor said with a smile, crossing his legs as he sat down next to her. Sinners from all over the pride ring were socializing outside of the large mansion. He knew you were inside finalizing preparations and possibly screaming your head off. Overall, the air was chilled with a comfortable atmosphere. Well, it had been comfortable, until a loud noisy vehicle stopped at the front gates. Everyone’s heads were turning, Rosie and Alastor looking at each other with strained smiles. Stepping out of the large limousine were the three vee’s, vulgar music blaring from the vehicles speakers as the three made their way through the now open gates. Reporters lined the edges of the gates, trying desperately to see the overlords inside and to try and sneak into the gala, which was starting soon.
“Mr.Vox! Mr.Vox!” News reporters shouted. Velvet was busy taking selfies of her and her outfit, her assistant following close behind her. Valentino was busy looking down at everyone, smoking his usual, while taking his long strides next to Vox, who was in the middle of the three.
On Vox’s right was Valentino, who donned a captivating look for the gala. His tailored white suit boasted a jacket that reached just above the knee, a subtle departure from his usual floor-length coat. The crimson silk lining peeked through, adding a luxurious touch to the outfit. The coat, reminiscent of his extravagant style, also had a vivid-red hue with his signature white fur trim at the wrists. The black and white striped fur trim along the center-front added a distinctive flair. A gold chain and love-heart-shaped broach fastenings adorned the coat, creating an opulent yet alluring look. Finally, he wore polished black heeled boots, maintaining the sleek and captivating allure that defined Valentino’s presence. The familiar color scheme remained intact, blending sophistication with a hint of provocative charm for the grand gala.
On Vox’s left was Velvet, who had spent months perfecting her outfit for the gala, in hopes she’d be invited of course. She had begged the boys to keep a good public appearance, in hopes they’d be recognized and invited to the crimson gala. Velvette, deciding to ditch her usual style, embraced a lavish and over-the-top look that represented her brand. Dressed in a knee-length dress, the garment had a striking blend of black and red hues. The dress, fitted at the waist, flowed into a voluminous skirt, creating a sense of extravagance. The bodice of the dress featured intricate lace detailing. A white collar adorned with a velvet bow added a playful yet mature flair. The sleeves, a fusion of burgundy and white patterns, contributed to the overall lavish aesthetic she had been going for. Her accessories took on a more refined form. Velvet gloves, adorned with delicate lace, graced her hands, and a pearl necklace adorned her neck, adding a classic touch, completed with maroon heels, each step resonating with a sense of grandeur. Velvet’s transformation into this upscale attire reflected her desire to make a statement at the Crimson Gala.
In the middle, and the brains of the three vee’s, was none other than the head of Vox Tech, Vox himself. He wore a sleek and modern dark blue tuxedo, tailored with precision. Of course he could only have the best. The suit featured subtle futuristic patterns that enhanced his ‘perfect’ sense of style. To complement his high-tech vibe, Vox wore a light blue undershirt with an upside-down broadcast symbol. Vox's gala attire seamlessly blended power and control with his technological edge, creating a memorable look in shades of dark blue, which in his opinion, was the best color.
Upon seeing Alastor, Vox’s eye twitched noticeably. The gates shut behind the three vee’s, closing off the gala to the public. The overlords begin to get closer together unknowingly, Zestial finding a comfortable corner to watch things play out. Carmilla and Zeezie stand close together, whispering to one another as both Rosie and Alastor stand from the bench. Vox, Valentino and Velvet make their way to the Radio Demon and his colleagues.
“I see the grandpa’s were invited.” Velvet says with a scoff, scrolling through her phone.
“So disrespectful.” Carmilla says under her breath, looking away from the three vee’s.
“Hm, interesting, and I was beginning to think the only interesting thing tonight would be the dinner.” Bethesda said, her brother nodding.
“Well, it seems the children brought their play date to the public then.” Zeezie says. The other overlords laugh and Valentino sneers at her.
“Well an idiota like you would think so. Then again, don’t you all do the same with your diapers?” He asked, puffing the smoke into her face. She growls at him, fists clenching at her side, but Carmilla stops her.
“Didn’t they say this was an adult only gala?” Carmilla asked, Rosie chuckling at her words.
“Oh can it grandma.” Velvete said. But Vox remained silent, having his own personal staring match with Alastor, whose smile was stretched ear to ear, teeth on full display.
“I thought this gala was meant for real talent?” Vox asked, stepping closer to Alastor.
“Well it was until you showed up.” Alastor said with a smile. “There’s no originality in copying someone else.” He tuts. Vox narrows his eyes, face twisting with anger as he steps closer to Alastor again.
“You wanna tell me something, you old piece of-“ Vox is stopped, the lights to the exterior of the mansion dimming. The lights behind the large front doors opening slowly. Two tall black shadowy figures stepped from the door, smoke at their feet.
“Thank you all for your attendance. As we know, the annual Crimson Gala is held every year, and this year is no different. With the new extermination date, important decisions must be made. Tonight, ten individuals will be selected to sit at Madame’s table where she will discuss private plans on how to move forward.” The two said in unison. Everyone fell silent as more shadows appeared, each one sitting on the sides of the steps. Lights around the staircases began to light up, and people began making their way up the stairs.
“Well~ this should be fun.”
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