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thieves-in-the-palace · 8 months

Note

jumps into ur ask box hello. hi. what are ur ng+ time loop thoughtz

god i have. a lot of thoughts about ng+ time loops in general. in relation to this post tho i specifically have Some Thoughts about Akira going through the loops trying to figure out why he's stuck there, how to get out, etc and also having to contend with Akechi dying every time but also like…the inevitable emotional cycles that come with watching the same guy die over and over.

✧ "Who is more unlucky here? The one who will die every time but never remember? Or the one who will live every time and always remember?" –> "Me. I'm the more unlucky one. What's this dude's fucking problem" –> "What's MY fucking problem? Why does this keep happening to me? Why doesn't anyone else remember? Why can't I escape this? Why does Akechi have to die every time??" –> "What's this dude's FUCKING problem–"

✧ does it count as a parasocial relationship if you know the guy irl and also it's based on the weird sense of kinship that comes with being doomed to repeatedly live through the same year over and over while he's doomed to die every time. hand in hand they are BOTH doomed baybee

✧ You know how Akechi is often portrayed as having Death Note-esque internal monologues when interacting with Akira? That but Akira is having his own wildly different internal monologue that sounds a lot like "okay you shit idiot. what's it gonna take to keep you from dying"

✧ The rest of the Thieves are surprised when Akira doesn't seem to react to Akechi's death, but they figure he's trying to keep it together for the sake of the mission. Truly tho Akira is mentally cussing Akechi out and lamenting the fact they're gonna have to fight god again soon. rip lawboy you would've loved fighting ol' yaldy

✧ Futaba hacks Akira's phone (for enrichment) and sees his most recent google search "is it bad to stop feeling bad after the 15th time you watch the same person die or are you allowed to start getting annoyed about it" – maybe he's going through something similar to what she went through w/ her mom? She starts prodding him about his past, but it doesn't really get her anywhere…

(If u want to get even more into Game-Based Reality Nonsense u could even say that Futaba can't find anything on Akira aside from his criminal record. No hospital records, no school info, no nothing. It's like the guy didn't even exist before the day he got arrested. Akira might not have any answers either, which, u know, doesn't help with the mental strain caused by being stuck in a time loop. Does he even exist outside of the loop? If the loop ended, would he disappear with it? etc etc)

✧ At the beginning of each loop, Akira makes a list of things that might break the time loop, updating it as needed. "Akechi survives" is at the top of the list every time bc it's one of the only things that never happens.

✧ Akira just generally having a slightly shorter temper w/ Akechi bc truly. How do u go through this sort of ordeal w/o wanting to rattle him like a maraca after a point. He won't hesitate to call Akechi cringe when the guy leans too heavily on his Pleasant Lawboy™ persona.

They wind up sparring in Mementos more frequently bc this Akira is more willing to entertain Akechi's bloodlust; fighting is a good outlet for Akira's own frustrations. Akechi keeps getting more and more annoyed each time tho bc why tf can this attic trash keep up with him? How is he predicting Akechi's attacks so well? (Akechi's going to start spitting fire if he ever finds out Akira has been holding back during their fights lmao. Akira can easily trounce him in 1v1 since like…3 loops ago?)

✧ Akira spending so much time annoyed and even furious w/ Akechi for not having enough self-preservation to survive even one loop only to ultimately circle right back into The Guilt + Sorrow bc god, all this time and he still can't figure out how to keep this fuckhead alive?

And it IS guilt Akira feels, unfortunately. Makoto and Futaba were both antagonistic towards the Phantom Thieves at first, too. Just spending some time with them was enough to reveal how getting screwed over by adults guided their actions; it doesn't absolve them of threatening the group, but it makes them easier to forgive.

Akira wonders, sometimes, if he's too quick to forgive Akechi. He's killed people, and he claims to be perfectly okay with being a murderer so long as it means he can reach his goals. But Akechi is a liar all the way down, too, because a cold-hearted killer wouldn't sacrifice himself for his enemies. He wouldn't give up his only shot at vengeance so easily after going through years of hell to achieve it. Yet Akechi still dies in that boiler room every time. Akechi never truly hates Akira, and Akira can't quite bring himself to ever truly hate Akechi, either.

But then Akira sees Akechi alive and well and smiling for the camera in the next loop, and he gets the abrupt urge to lay the guy out.

✧ "I want you to live. I also never want to see you again."

✧ And all of this is w/o getting into P5R's third semester hijinks. Akira thinking he's finally escaped the time loop only to realize that something Worse is happening now.

And Akechi is still there, because of fucking course he is–

#sorry for the delay on this btw! (<-cursed w/ tendency to draft asks and forget to post them)#ask #anonymous #persona 5 #p5 #akira kurusu #ren amamiya #goro akechi #Kidd speaking #ng+ time loops are. my beloveds my breads n butters #this isn't intended to be shuake but it can EASILY be read as such jhfgfgjhfg #ng+ time loop v1

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lieutenantfloyd · 2 years

Text

NSFW alphabet - Beau “Cyclone” Simpson

Requested?: Yes

Warnings: 18+ content. Minors DNI.

Words: 1.8k

note: apparently my version of self care is writing porn about a 50 year old man.

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Cyclone is the king of Aftercare. To him it's an essential part of the experience. It's also his time to make sure it was a wholly pleasurable experience for you. Sex with him can become both physically and mentally demanding for you. Whether you're taking a shower together or staying in bed, he'll make sure to clean you up and sing you praises.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

His: His hands. Specifically their ability to make you come apart in ultimate pleasure and put you together again with comfort.

Yours: your neck. Biting, choking, or just making you arch your back so you expose your throat to him. He loves the intimacy, vulnerability, and trust of it.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He will almost always cum in you. Visuals are very important to him, and most he wants to see his cum drip out of you. He will, however, cum in your mouth as punishment.

i.e. "If you act like a slut, I'm going to treat you like one. Fix your attitude and do what Daddy asks you to and he'll fill your pretty pussy just like you want him to."

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He's acutely aware of what turns you on and purposefully implements them all through the day just do you'll break his rules/he'll have a reason to punish you. Worst of all he's just inconspicuous about it that you haven't caught onto him yet.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

I personally don't think that Cyclone has had many partners, but that's not to say he isn't experienced. He honestly finds the subject of sex and sexual expression fascinating. Even what he hasn't physically done he's well versed in. He knows what he likes and is more than willing to explore with you if you so desire.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Doggy, with a hand between your shoulder blades as your pinned to the mattress. Not only does it feel amazing, but it allows him to be most dominant/in control.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

It's 100% serious on his end, but if you want to joke around when he's in a more adoring mood he's happy to indulge you.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He keeps things trimmed, mostly out of personal preference. As for his partners, he's perfectly happy with whatever they're comfortable with.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Nine times out of ten, Beau is as intimate as intimate gets. Although he's not the music and candles type, he lives to praise, touch, and love you, aka making you feel like the only thing in the world that matters. That's because to him, you are.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

It's not his favorite, but he can't help himself every so often. On your most recent birthday you flipped the script and had him jack off while you watched. It almost changed his whole opinion on the matter.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks

Daddy kink, dom/sub dynamic, cock warming, hair pulling, biting, size kink. Receiving: scratching, cum play, somnophilia. Giving : Degradation, orgasm denial, bondage mutual masturbation, spanking, brat taming, collars, breeding.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

He's willing to get down just about anywhere, but he does have a particular love of doing it in his office. Whether it's his one at home or on base, something about the atmosphere and mixing his work and private life's (which he works very hard to keep separate) really gets him going.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Honestly? Everything. But above all what's gets him going is disobedience, especially if it's for his benefit. He's set very clear rules and expectations for you and wholly expects you to be good for him. But you like to push his boundaries just a bit. For instance, he's specified that you aren't allowed to play with him while he's working. Yet you noticed that he'd been working late recently and wanted to help relieve some of his stress. In his office he gave you a exactly 3 warnings to cut it out before he had you pinned to his desk, work all but forgotten.

N = No (something they wouldn't do, turn offs)

Threesomes aren't completely off the table, but it would take a hell of a lot of convincing. He's more than a little possessive and quite honestly doesn't trust anyone else to be with you and respect your boundaries.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Easily one of Cyclones top 5 favorite things in this world. Whether he's burying his head between your legs until you can't take anymore or sitting like a king while you choke on his cock, he's completely obsessed.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

This really depends! There are times when his pace is downright brutal, while other times he's pumping into you with such leisurely yet precise thrusts it nearly drives you insane. If he's punishing you, expect to get downright railed. But there are many times he wants to reward you or is feeling more sentimental where he takes things nice and slow.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

It's far from preferred, but he's a busy man and sometimes he just needs you. Luckily, he's mastered the art of getting you both off in record time.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

With his affinity for office sex, he'd be lying if he said the thought of someone catching you both didn't turn him on a little bit. He's also not opposed to getting you off under the table or fucking you in the bathroom at important events/dinners.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

He'll go as long as you let him. That, paired with his willingness to take things slow (and take breaks for heavy petting) is a golden combination.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Oh absolutely. Cyclone owns a variety of toys, for a variety of occasions, all to be used on you.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

As much as he lives to please, he loves to tease a bit more. Aside from the standard, whisper of filthy things in your ear, his degradation and orgasm control/denial kinks really come out when he starts teasing you. He'll alternate spanking and fingering you until you're quite literally dripping with desire. Only to then pull his hand away and start massaging your thighs, hips, and ass. Ignoring your core completely. All while calling you his little slut and expressing the most filthy thoughts someone could come up with.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

He's not much of a moaner, but good lord is he a dirty talker. Above all else his ability to keep a completely neutral and steady voice is outstanding. It's truly one of life's greatest mysteries. He's not shy with groans and curses either.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Cyclone will almost always push you back onto the mattress if you try to ride him. Not because he doesn't love it (the complete opposite, actually) but because you sitting in his lap and raking your nails through his chest hair makes him cum faster than he’d like to admit. Therefore, he saves it for when he wants to feel particularly good.

This totally isn't an excuse for me to talk about his chest hair haha

X = X-ray (let's see what's going on under those clothes)

If you're here, you most likely know that Jon Hamm's dick is Hollywood's version of the Loch Ness monster. It even blessed us with one of the best articles that has ever graced the internet, aptly titled ~ Jon Hamm's Ham: A Penile Retrospective

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Extremely high. But where most people with his sec drive would ask for a couple rounds a day, he prefers to drag things out throughout the day until neither of you can handle it anymore.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

He definitely gets tired afterwards, but not necessarily sleepy. Once you're settled and all taken care of, he's pulling you into him for what is greatest cuddle of all time.

taglist:

@marchingicenotes7, @bayisdying, @princessofglitterland, @bella-law, @callsignaries, @katesmadness, @dannyramirezwife, @oliviah-25, @luckyladycreator2, @shakira-sasha, @xoxabs88xox, @Criminalmindsandmarvel, @austin-butlers-gf, @nyx2021, @fanboyluvr, @alexxavicry, @madamemelancholysstuff, @paola-carter, @barbiewritesstuff, @dozcan123

#b.simpson #beau cyclone simpson x reader #beau cyclone simpson #cyclone smut #cyclone top gun #cyclone #cyclone x reader #top gun x reader #top gun fanfiction #top gun fic #top gun #top gun maverick

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rosietrace · 5 months

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Heyo Elosie 😊

Can I request interaction of Mitch with anyone or Felicitas? Thank u pookieee😊😊

PLS ELOSIE.... But of course, pookie 😈

Much like with Jas' ask, I'll be making a separate post for Felicitas!

Camilla Marigold — Thoughts on Mitch Reiss

Character Featured: Camilla Marigold

Mentioned: Mitch Reiss, Neige LeBlanche

Pairing: Camilla Marigold x Mitch Reiss

Warning(s): Cami /j, she just can't admit that she's attracted to him gdi, Mitch having to put up with her shenanigans, I'll finish their oneshot… Eventually /j, potentially ooc

[ Apologies for any out of character moments ]

[ Reblogs > Likes ]

†•°•══════ஓ๑❃๑ஓ══════•°•†

“He’s attractive, I'll give him that…. What?? You'd say the same thing if you saw him! Ugh, shut up, I'm not attracted to him, and I'm not desperate!! Now- Uhh- Have you seen him anywhere, I haven't seen him since before lunch-”

— Camilla Marigold

╔══ஓ๑†๑ஓ══╗

Non-verbal Thoughts

╚══ஓ๑†๑ஓ══╝

「 General Thoughts 」

˚₊· ͟͟͞➳❥ She's so intrigued by him, it's not even funny. Like, it can get fucking concerning how intrigued she is by this guy, like damn girl, what did he do-?

➜ Camilla's probably that one walking annoyance in Mitch's life /j, too bad he can't get rid of her!

➜ He doesn't really approve of her gossiping tendencies, but unfortunately, it's a part of Camilla that he can't really change. So, really, all Mitch has to do is to put up with it.

➜ It honestly surprised Camilla that he's (eventually) so protective over her well-being! She reminds him that she's capable of taking care of herself, but apparently, Mitch isn't easily swayed by her words.

➜ No matter how good Cami is at concealing how she really feels about Mitch, her serpents can't. They're practically nagging at her to talk to Mitch whenever he's within a 5-mile radius, and it annoys the hell out of her.

↳ It definitely doesn't help that some of them openly show affection towards Mitch.

➜ She's never gonna admit it to his face, but Cami envies Neige for having Mitch as a bodyguard. Like damn, leave some for the rest of us, Neige 💀

➜ Mitch tended to keep Camilla at arm's length when Neige was with him, at least at first. It annoyed Cami to no end, and it still does.

༝ㅤ･ㅤ˚ㅤ。ㅤ.ㅤ⋆ㅤ「❃」

「 Interactions 」

❐ They probably met when Mitch found Neige talking with Cami, and immediately figuring out that something was off. Specifically, about how…. Persistent Camilla was being with Neige.

➜ A rough start to their relationship! Mitch learned the hard way that Cami won't be easily persuaded to stop herself from doing what she does. And vice versa.

➜ Neige is thankfully oblivious to Cami's antics, and apparently, ships the two of them together without them knowing /hj

➜ Mitch doesn’t fear Camilla…. At least, not in the way he expected to fear her. And by that, I mean that Cami uses him as her personal target whenever she wants to put some new ‘babies’ (read: guns) to the test. Mitch just has to deal with it, ig.

➜ Much like Cami to him, Mitch isn't gonna admit that he finds her attractive. He doesn't know why, but he can't shake off an unusual feeling he gets when Camilla is close by.

➜ Hates her singing voice. And I can't blame him.

➜ Mitch is willing to give her the benefit of the doubt once they grow closer, but…. As mentioned before, he already knows he shouldn't expect much results from that.

➜ He wants to observe more of her, see what she's actually like behind that overly confident and manipulative mask of hers. To see how truly vulnerable she is, before he regrets things he'll never be able to change.

➜ …. It'll take a while for that to happen, though. Much like how it'll take just as — if not longer — for Camilla to confess to him.

†•°•══════ஓ๑❃๑ஓ══════•°•†

#twisted wonderland oc #twst oc #mutuals <3 #twst ocs #mutuals ask #mutuals asks #mitch reiss #camilla marigold #『 camilla 🐍 』#「🌹」 oc interactions #oc asks!#asks!

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tvrningout-a · 8 months

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I GREW UP ON DISNEY | plots & connections for your convenience ♡

featuring: rin

these are just some ideas ( some vague, some more specific ) that i'd like to write and that hopefully catch your interest! feel free to like this post if there's a plot/dynamic you'd like to write, and i'll message you about it! ♡(>ᴗ•)

rin

before she became the " lightwielder, " rin was well-known among nobles and fellow rogues alike for being the best at what she did, no matter how annoying you might find her to be. gimme old clients and comrades who either find it hilarious that she's some religious figure for the people, or they think she's conning everybody!

gimme people she's double-crossed, too, who either side with king edmund and try to kill her, or they're with the free army and can't stand being under her command. i want that enemies to allies to friends dynamic <3

but also gimme people she's helped out, people who would follow her anywhere bc even if she acts the fool, they know the person rin really is :' )

rin and delwyn are the only solid characters i currently have as leaders of the free army, so maybe!! your muse can be one of the former king's bannermen, a war advisor, an ambassador, etc.

the free army helps many villages and cities survive king edmund's attacks, so maybe your muse is one of the citizens, the person in charge, a random noble, etc. and you gotta deal with this snarky elf as your hero :' )

rin struggles with accepting that the gods might actually exist, so i think that would be something fun to explore with another person! she's kinda bitter and cynical when it comes to the subject bc of her past, so expect resistance

if you don't let me write rin saving your muse from certain death and having a heartfelt reunion at least once, what's the point??

if you don't let me write rin being saved by your muse from certain death and having a heartfelt reunion at least once, what's the point??

if rin isn't made for the " i call you an idiot several times while treating your wounds -- stop smiling, idiot " scenario, then i don't know who is

i want partners in crime for rin but i also want mom friends who sigh so heavily every time she smiles bc they just know they're not gonna like whatever she's about to say asdfg

i'm still developing this world, so if you want your muse to be from your own organization/league ( of mages, for example ), i'm all for it! we can then talk about whether they'd be allies with rin/the free army, king edmund, be neutral, etc.

honestly, whatever you imagine up, i'm willing to listen and work with you bc i love!! world building, and there's a lot that can be done with the story as it currently is!

#will smith poses at rin!!! and this post!!!#gimme your muses rn right this instant i am asking and demanding and vibrating asdfg #i haven't decided how active i'm gonna be today but man do i wanna develop stuff for my silly lil elf :' ))#i grew up on disney | wishlist

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quillpokebiology · 1 year

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So, I've asked around a lot, and it seems like not a single professor on here is willing to help me make heads or tails of my Marshadow… Which I suspect is due to them not wanting to risk their professional reputation on a pokemon thought to not even exist just a few months ago.

I figured since you're a student, you'd subscribe to no such amounts of caution. (I'm also getting a bit desperate)

Basically, I'd like a bit of an analysis of my Marshadow, if you can manage that. I need to know what makes it tick, and specific needs that go beyond those of normal ghost type Pokemon, as it's far from normal (even though I personally don't consider it an actual Mythical, just rare).

If not, I'll look elsewhere. Again. But thanks for your time.

P.s. I'll send in samples if you need them for testing or something, idk, I'm not a doctor. But the little guy(?) drools, sheds, and isn't potty trained yet so it should be easy to get samples from it.

Hello! I'd love to answer this! I've never cared or seen a marshadow in real life, and I'd love for you to send me samples of its DNA! If you can, just mail it to Uva-Naranja academy! But since I don't know much about its DNA and how it's body works, this will mostly talk about behavior.

(I may or may not have gotten the info from the science part of the black market, but that's not important)

(Also tell those professors to grow up. You can't be right about everything; the whole point of science to is to build on to what you already may or may not know)

Marshadow

(Art by Pixiv)

Marshadow is a "mythical" pokemon native to the Alola region. They're fighting/ghost type, which is a really unique and rare typing!

It's thought that this pokemon was a myth, until a scientist in Alola discovered it in the flesh. The reason it took so long to find these pokemon is because they hid in the shadows for so long. It saw pokemon fighting and practiced their fighting techniques, making them excellent in combat. They also do a lot of shadow boxing, do don't mind it if it starts punching the air for no reason.

They seem to be extremely shy, as they've hid in the shadows for so long. Your marshadow might dissappear for a couple of days because it's hiding somewhere, or it might even be your shadow. Who knows.

Zenith Marshadow

When angered or in, marshadow goes into a Zenith Form. It becomes a lot more powerful and dangerous in this form.

Care

This part is mostly for the asker.

Your marshadow seems young. He isn't potty trained, right? I suggest getting him a litter box, or something similar. Let him no that that's where it's supposed to do it's business, and reward then when they don't have an accident. Imagine it's like raising a child basically.

You could teach it how to use the toilet. I just suggested litterbox since it'll instinctively know that it's supposed to cover it, and it'll be less weird.

I'd suggest keeping it out of overly sunny or bright areas, as well as populated areas. Due to how shy they are, places with a lot of people and pokemon can make them feel overwhelmed and panicky. Too much sun can harm its eyes, and at noon, the shadows will be smaller, and it might not have anywhere good to hide.

They can eat, but not as often as other pokemon. Feeding it once a week should be enough.

I don't know what will tick off your marshadow personally. This is really all the info I have on it right now. But I'd be happy for you to tell me any new things you figure out. Best of luck to caring for it!

#quill pokefacts #quill awnsers #pokemon biology #pokemon biologist #pokemon #pokemon irl #irl pokemon #pokeblog #pokeblogging #pokeblr #rotomblr #rotumblr #pkmn irl #irl pkmn #pokemon roleplay

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ragnarokproofing · 7 months

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author ask tag game

Thank you for the tag, @catchingbigfish! I'm tagging @sarahlizziewrites, @moonandris, and @sam-glade with no pressure, and with an open tag for anyone else who is interested. Apologies if you've already done it, this has been sitting in my drafts for like a month.

All of these answers are in regards to my thesis, which is a large-scale dark fantasy novel with an alternating third-person PoV.

(1) What is the main lesson of your story (e.g. kindness, diversity, anti-war), and why did you choose it?

I don't like to conceptualize my fiction as having "lessons." It's not so much that it's inherently inaccurate as that it's not constructive, or conducive to deep and resonating fiction; I have found that this presentation lends itself to moral absolutism. Furthermore, I don't tend to have my characters learn objective moral lessons, but rather learn or decide something about themselves or the world, and make a choice about how they are going to act in the future.

So to phrase it in that way, "what does your main character realize or decide about himself," my main character Fasenil decides that there is enough in the world that makes it worth saving even though it's largely hostile to his existence, and that he is willing to sacrifice himself in order to save it.

(2) What did you use as inspiration for your worldbuilding (like real-life cultures, animals, famous media, websites, etc.)?

I am very aware that the first thing that any of my readers think of when they read my drafts are Skyrim. While it is an inspiration to some extent, my world is far more inspired by real-life cultures, primarily real-life Viking Age Scandinavia. I take historical research very seriously, and I take great pains to maintain historical accuracy when relevant. I have a frankly massive number of sources that I'm not going to cite here.

That's the main inspiration for the area of my map where the novel takes place; inspirations for the larger world include the Holy Roman Empire, 20th century fascist movements, and more.

(3) What is your MC trying to achieve, and what are you, the writer, trying to achieve with them? Do you want to inspire others, teach forgiveness, help readers grow as a person?

I think that this question runs up against the same problems as the first. I don't desire to teach readers any sort of specific lesson with my fiction. If they take lessons away, that's nice, but it's not something that I concern myself with.

To answer a related but separate question, I hope that some small fraction of readers who feel the same things as I do feel on some level seen; not the shallow "validation" that is so often talked about in online art and fandom spaces, but with the sort of universe-reordering forcefulness and urgency that I've felt so few times in my life. Not saying "you are a market that it is advantageous to target," but "you exist, I see you, and I know." I am writing, in that sense, to my younger self.

My characters both are in an abstract sense seeking to transcend their pasts, and to find belonging. At the beginning, Fasenil is at first balancing his desire for "success" and accolades with the growing threat that visibility presents to him. Hallbjorn is trying desperately to carve out a life that is free from the obligation of violence, but can't seem to do it. I don't consider it my job to pretend that any of these struggles have objectively correct or moral answers. I can only have my characters make decisions, and do their best to forge a way forward.

(4) How many chapters is your story going to have?

I mean, there are thirty in my outline, but that is extremely fluid. It is possible that it will eventually be divided up into a duology.

(5) Is it fanfiction or original content? Where do you plan to post it?

It's an original fiction novel, also functioning as my MFA thesis. I don't plan on posting anything more than snippets and supplemental content (art, memes, etc) anywhere; it will be traditionally published.

(6) When and why did you start writing?

I've been writing since I was a little kid. I've only been taking it seriously as a craft and as a career path for about a year and a half.

(7) Do you have any words of engagement for fellow writers of Writeblr? What other writers of Tumblr do you follow?

I follow many, many writers of tumblr, too many to name here.

The piece of advice that I repeat to myself most often is, "good prose is a renewable resource." What this means is that you must trust in your ability to be able to generate good prose in the future, and not stay married to ineffectual passages just because they are well-written or you are fond of them. My first priority is the function of a paragraph/passage/scene within context, because that is much more difficult to revise than prose itself, which can always be improved.

Also, participate. Write weird essays and post them. Read more. Pick a topic that interests you and read half a dozen papers about it on jstor. Ask questions and offer to workshop people's stuff for them, and then get good at workshopping. Form your own opinions instead of just absorbing whatever's popular in the social media-sphere that you're in.

#my posts #tag game #unnamed thesis tag #writeblr tag game #writeblr

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izzy-b-hands · 3 months

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fanfic asks! 5, 8, and 14

Ella!!! Thank you for asking 🫂🫂

Putting this under a cut because I am a wordy motherfucker as ever and This Got Long, I'm So Sorry💖

5. What’s a fic idea you’ve had that you will never write?

Oh god. So Many fkldsjaflkdsjfa. I'll stop at twoish here, but pls know that if y'all want more for other fandoms, I can add to this post with more lmaoo, I love sharing these.

-There was one for LOTR that still sticks in my brain years since first having it: Sam suddenly leaving the Shire and wandering aimlessly, but refusing to settle anywhere.

Over the course of it, he would get help/care/concern from wherever he stopped with whoever remained in each location, but he would refuse to stay for more than a few days or accept more than like. Bare bones food/medical care/etc, leading to literally everyone he meets and of course his family and friends still in the Shire to go to Frodo to beg, plead with him.

One last adventure, because their grand adventure to save the world and destroy the ring changed Sam too, even if he never showed it as much. Don't let him go where no one else can follow, and bring him home.

Whether Frodo would or not was the bit that made me shelve the idea, bc I figured a lot of fans would not enjoy the potential avenue I was leaning towards, that he might hesitate only in that he isn't sure he can handle the journey himself.

That, and realising that the way my brain wanted to write it, it might well end with Frodo and Sam realising neither of them can bare to go back, and deciding to wander together until they'd either die or find elves sailing willing to take them to the Undying Lands.

-There's a whole bundle of Saints Row ideas, mostly Gat/Aisha/Boss and all fairly heavy in being AUs where Aisha lives and things go slightly differently for Gat in SR 3 &4 (I'd keep the aliens tho lmao, I want Aisha to get to go to space too dang it!!)

A lot of Gat realising that he keeps nearly losing the people closest to him that give him reason to live (Aisha and the Boss, tho of course the rest of the Saints as well to a slightly lesser extent), but that he doesn't know how to be anything else for them. He's a living weapon many a time, and is genuinely happy that way, but knows that it puts them in danger because he tends to always escalate things, even when later he can admit maybe shooting a motherfucker in the face over a Costco discount was actually not the best way to solve that issue. However, ultimately, The Boss can't seem to live any other way either, and he's accepted that he's at his happiest when he has both of them in his life, so he can't just up and cut with Aisha to a random suburb and leave the Boss behind. And Aisha, despite her contempt for a lot of it, during one of their Big Talks would admit that even if she dislikes what they do, she does enjoy the lifestyle and knows Boss and Gat would be losing their minds trying to adjust to any other life.

On that note, that's also a fic idea I'll probably never write for them lol, where they go straight and move away to somewhere entirely new with Gat and the Boss having to get actual 8-5 jobs (and maybe something remote for Aisha bc I know it would still be risky for her to ever leave the house but. Goddamn let her do something!! Talk to some other ppl!!!) and just. It's not going to last and they know it won't, all three of them, but they're also three of the stubbornest fucking people alive so. When it ends, it'll go up in flames for everyone around them until they're living in a way they find satisfying again.

8. What project(s) are you currently working on?

Somehow too many and not enough at the same time. That is, I'm having a lot of percolating ideas for new things and ways to continue current drafts for a few different fandoms, but none of it is making it down onto paper (without being deleted two minutes later at least lol.)

That said, a couple draft examples:

-an OFMD S2 fix it gentlebeard POV, Stede specifically, wherein the crew comes to visit and be their first official guests and it's...a lot for them. They both already feel the place isn't fixed up enough and then the crew comes in all jovial and essentially as one big happy polycule w/arms full of loot (actually gifts for Ed & Stede that are indeed looted, but my two lil goofballs gotta have their emotional moments before they get that info and realise that the crew isn't just trying to show off & make them feel shit for staying on land.)

This one is actually done and ends happily w/some actual communication between everyone involved, but it sits unpublished bc I think it might be too saccharine (also every time I dare to write for Ed/Stede I get shouted at even if they claim they liked it so. not exactly eager to court that reaction again even if I have anon off on everything lmao)

-May have already talked abt this in prior days but, a Frenchie/Ed s2 au in which Frenchie convinces Ed to let everyone else go, so long as Frenchie agrees to stay with him as his new first mate (read: his new Izzy bc while Izzy is v alive in this, he's also hidden away until Ed and Frenchie leave the Revenge lol.)

I haven't decided on a final avenue yet for this, but right now have been playing w/: Frenchie & Ed operating as a two man wrecking crew while they gather new crew and a new ship, meanwhile Jim, Archie, Fang, and Izzy are working to find Stede and everyone else to tell them how Frenchie has essentially given himself a suicide mission, and even if they agreed to it so they could initially get away, they sure as fuck aren't going to let him or Ed die as a result of all of this. Cut to them having some silly fumbling reunion (literal list of ideas for this, they're all not great, trust me when I say this bit needs more work yet lol), then following the trail of blood, bodies, and tears to find Frenchie and Ed. Who, during all of this, are actually having some meaningful and approaching healthier conversations abt their traumas and have gotten closer during them. A lot closer. Very close. And it's not an issue of monogamy; they make clear at the start with each other that this might not have any legs outside of their current situation, and they both know that Stede probably won't care, and they've both been fucking Izzy so they know he definitely doesn't care (and has told them as much more than once after noticing them Noticing each other.) Their fear is that it will, and that what they both want isn't compatible (Frenchie knows they can't sail forever, but he'd rather die at sea. Ed, after struggling with it, admits that he's still not entirely sure if land or sea is best for him. But he does feel like he has to choose one over the other.) And what the fuck are they gonna do then? Because if that's the case and it ends what they have on every level, that'll mark yet another failure for them in both of their brains, and they're both entirely too fragile for that to happen, it'll be the crack that shatters Ed and splits the Box of Trauma in Frenchie's brain even wider open. But they do have love for each other, and can't ignore that either.

14. If you could see one of your fics adapted into a visual medium, such as comic or film, which fan fic would you pick?

Oh man. I'm gonna be selfish and give myself two bc I can't decide for sure between them and the first one is entirely too selfish a choice on its own on top of that but

Dancer and/or All For Myself (even tho it isn't finished, I know, I know!!! I always want it badly to be finished. That's still my game plan for this one, I swear!)

Like, Taron probably wants nothing to do with the Kingsman stuff anymore, absolutely valid. But my god seeing Dancer as a full movie or extended series or something would be amazing. It's not everyone's cup of tea for many reasons and I understand why, but I worked so hard on that lil fucker. I'm so proud of it. It's one of the few that I think, if I got the opportunity, I could edit and change up enough to sell as just above direct to dvd level movie script. I can't describe how it felt writing it; it was a particular feeling and magic I have not recaptured since writing this fucking fic lmao (still chasing it tho!)

The second one is just because I like seeing Con and Samba together and they seem to have fun and both enjoy the concept of rizzy so like. If in some universe where incredibly unlikely things actually happen, they came to me and asked for finished script version of AFM, y'all would not see me for ages bc I would lock myself down until I had it done. I'm talking living off of red bull and edibles and whatever snacks I remember to cram in my face-fueled writing, coming out the other end in need of a shower, actual food, sleep, but holding a beautifully shining script. I've done it before, and I would happily do it again for them lol. Plus, it would involve filming locally, and I just think that would be cool to do, to showcase the area. Lots of very cool and pretty filming locations, beach days...idk, I'd be happy to come along for every day of it and just do shit to help out. Pay me if you can/want, but I'm just happy to be there to see the process.

Thank you again for asking, as you can tell I had a good time and it was lovely to get to gush abt all of this for a bit!!!

#text post #ask box things #long post

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h0neyp0tat0 · 1 month

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!! MINORS DON'T INTERACT, THERE WILL BE 18+ STUFF ON THIS BLOG !! I'll block ageless blogs !!

I haven't written anything really for yeeeeaaaars and only ONCE posted any of it anywhere online. I realized that I need to stop thinking about how I SHOULD write and just. WRITE! 'Cause I'll never improve, if I don't even begin

♡❤About Me❤♡

⋆✦Rules/Info✦⋆

I don't have much experience and I'm not 100% sure what way I'll be going with this blog, so I don't exactly take requests. But if you DO decide to send one, then please have patience with me, my AuDHD brain and lack of skill/experience-

I'll write one-shots, drabbles, imagines,headcanons, reacts, etc. the usually shorter stuff. I may have my own headcanons about certain things, but I'm willing to entertain the "what-ifs", even if it's not canon-friendly, is an unpopular fan opnion or doesn't match-up with my own. Will help me try new things too.

Under the "Read-More" link, you'll find the lists over what I will and won't write~

✔Things I WILL/CAN write✔

Romance, Queer Platonic & Platonic/Familiar relations

Polyamory, Monogamy and Non-monogamy of other kinds

I'll try my hand at any gender identity and sexual/romantic orientation to the best of my abilities and with some research. I will however use they/them pronouns as the default

Likewise, I'll try my hand at neurodiversity, autoimmune diseases, disabilities, etc. but if I feel that research isn't enough, I may put a pin in it for later

This also goes for specific religions/culture/races/heritages/etc. I'd like to be able to write for any type, but as someone with a somewhat "unusual" family background myself, I know things can get super varied and specific. So I rather wait, than write something that is based on flawed understanding

Fluff

Comfort

Character react to Subculture!Reader and SpecificFashion/Aesthetic!Reader

HCs of Character as Subculture!Character and SpecificFashion/Aesthetic!Character

Smut (will be tagged as "H0rney" or "H0rneyp0tat0" ): - BDSM and Vanilla both - Sub!Character x Dom!Reader (switches included) - Dom!Character x Sub!Reader (switches included here too) - Petplay - CG/L, Mommy/Daddy Kink, whatever you wanna call it - Some CNC!kink and paraphilias that can be accomplished in a consensual and safe manner (use/mention of safewords, included aftercare, mention of prior discussion/planning, etc. to show consent. Think; somnophilia scenario that has been agreed upon beforehand, choking where the dom keeps track of the color in sub's face or make substitutions for safeword if they suddenly have difficulties talking, etc. I'm pretty limited in what I'll go with but you can throw in a suggestion/thirst if you want to.)

If a Character (or a PC) is a minor in the original media, then the most anyone will get, beyond Platonic/Familiar, is AgedUp!Character or Puppy Love (no encouragement if significant agegap or it will be something like "Character x Reader meeting/knowing each other when they were children and having a crush" stuff)

✘Things I WON'T write✘

Anything too ark and gory (at least, it will not be graphic or specific. It'll at most refer to Reader's past trauma) like torture, miscarriages, etc.

Paraphilias (based on the definition of extreme and dangerous, without consent and with intention of harm and/or abuse), actual beastality, rape or the like

Scat, ABDL, urination (Ain't gonna shamekink, but I simply can't get into these enough to actually think up anything I'd write)

This list may change over time (though it is likely just to add to it or rephrase) Anything not on the list, you can feel free to ask about but I make no promises

#h0neyp0tat0 #rules #info #pinned post #about me

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blueduplicity · 10 months

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✨Rules✨

-- 18+ only. I post smut, I don't want children interacting with it, if you don't have an age in your bio I'm going to block you for both our sakes.

-- I have social anxiety, big surprise nowadays, but it means I don't reply often. It's not out of malice or me wanting to ignore you, I just have a hard time with 1v1 conversations. If I don't reply, and you REALLY want a response, you can gently poke me about it. If you're rude, you will either not get a response or I will flame you in front of everyone, it depends on the day.

-- Officially, I will not do requests. If you have an idea that you think you can't write yourself, you CAN ask and if I can manage it, I'd be happy to try and write a little drabble or concept for you.

However, on that note, if you have an idea in mind that you want to see brought to life, I would suggest you do it yourself. It doesn't have to be "good" or published, it can be just for you. If you don't like it, write it again. I love the idea of having a concept that you want to see written so badly you can't help but do it yourself, and I would love for other people to look at it that way too. Bring your own idea into the world, it may not be the same as how you wanted it, but it will be beautiful because you wanted it so badly that you had no choice but to do it on your own.

Write what you want to see, it's why I started this blog to begin with.

-- I post dark content! It will probably get darker from here! I love exploring dark fantasy, and I've been really tentative so far, but I'm sure once I've found my medium it's only going to get worse. I won't be offended at all if you unfollow or don't like what I post! I never want to upset anyone with what I'm writing.

On that same vein, though, I do have to add that if you don't like that sort of content, don't tell me about it LOL because as valid as your feelings are, I'm not writing it for you. I'm writing it for the people who do, because it's hard to find stuff like this that's written in the specific way I like. Having a niche fantasy is really fuckin' difficult in a creative space because it's so easy to want to limit it, and it's even easier for the people who don't like it to want to shut it down. It sounds mean, but I have to say it again.

If you do not like dark content, that's okay, I am not writing it for you. Do not tell me how much you dislike it, because it's not for you. If you don't like blueberries, I'm not gonna listen to you tell me how much you don't like blueberry jam, y'know?

But if you do like blueberries, and you just don't like MY blueberry jam, that's good too! Tell me how I can make it different, if you can keep it respectful. I may not listen, but I'm down for constructive criticism.

-- HOWEVER. Even I have my limits. I will not write underaged characters, or scat, or gore. I'm sure there are niche kinks out there that I am also not willing to write for and I just don't know the names, so if you don't see something here, don't assume that means I will write it, I'm just not good at lists.

-- This one should be obvious, but I feel like it should go here anyway. Don't repost my stuff, I only post my writing to tumblr and Ao3, if I catch it anywhere else I'm gonna hunt you down in your sleep and put sharpie all over your face forever.

Also, if you feed my (or any) fics to any AI then I will call you very mean words and make you feel bad about yourself, cause that's exactly what you're doing to EVERYONE ELSE.

-- If you are a hateful or meanspirited person, I personally don't want you here. I'm gay as hell, my gender is a big fucking question mark, my friends and loved ones are all different shades of gay and our group has every gender color under the sun. If you're not okay with that, you won't be okay with me, you won't be okay with what I write, go somewhere else.

#i think this made me sound really mean #im not built for tumblr man idk how to do any of this LOL

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kitkatt0430 · 1 year

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4 and 7?

4.) How many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? Care to share one of them?

Too many to count and there's always something new showing up when I least expect it. Both a curse and blessing to be a fic writer with an overactive imagination.

So one that has been sitting in the back of my mind for a while is the Code Realize fusion fic where Eddie has a toxic touch. I haven't really written anything out yet, but I've got a general idea of how the first part of the story would go.

It would start with the local military of Central City, led by General Eiling, converging on a nearby abandoned town. Specifically a house where the town's sole inhabitant lives. Eddie Thawne. Eddie knows he's not supposed to go anywhere - the house he lives in is the only one where he can touch anything without his melting away to nothing. He never grows hungry and his boredom is relieved by the small library of books within, but Eddie longs for companionship.

Companionship his father's letter forbids him. Because, according to Eobard Thawne, Eddie is a monster.

But Eiling's arrival changes things. The General refuses to leave without Eddie and threatens to destroy the house itself if that's what it takes to force Eddie to go with him. Eddie can't risk his one sanctuary being destroyed and, reluctantly, agrees. But Eiling destroys the house anyway. 'Cause he's a jerk.

Dismayed because now the only things he can touch are the ones Eiling stole from the house before setting it on fire, Eddie thinks his only choice now is to go with Eiling; he can never escape to go home now, like he'd been hoping. But at the outskirts of town, a new option appears - a phantom thief calling himself the Flash appears, taunting Eiling and running off with Eddie in his arms.

The Flash introduces himself once they're safely away. His real name is Barry Allen and he needs Eddie's help, if Eddie's willing to give it. He's looking for Eobard Thawne, Eddie's father... because he has reason to believe Eobard Thawne is planning a terrorist attack on Central City. Eddie wants to find his father too. To find out whether he's truly planning something so terrible... but also to find out why he's a 'monster' and what it has to do with the shining stone he has in place of his heart.

That's when Cisco would show up with his steampunk car, introduced as the first of Barry's allies.

Since the game is heavy on the steampunk, I'd want to keep that as the setting for the series. And the eventual main ship would be Westhallen, though I'm still debating how to introduce Iris. I think it'd be fun to have her be the detective nemesis of Barry's, but that's a bit fuzzy right now and I want to be sure of what Iris' part in the series is before I start writing... for all that she won't show up for a while regardless.

7.) Share a snippet from one of your favorite pieces of prose you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it.

“Oh, honey,” Lisa patted his hand, “you look like you’re gonna cry. I’m a good listener if you need someone to talk to about what’s going on?”

She was the first person to just… touch him like it was no big deal since the lightning struck. Iris always hesitated, always had pity in her eyes. Joe looked guilty, as though he felt he should have protected Barry better. (And he should have; he’d laughed off Barry’s concerns about that damn skylight like everyone else did and now look at him. Barry was never going to be the same again. Scars like these don’t go away over time.) But Lisa didn’t flinch at the sight when he opened the door. Didn’t look him over with disgust. Didn’t make him feel like a freak just for surviving something that left its mark on his skin.

Barry started crying.

~ From Chrysalis

So in this fic series it was important to me that Barry had scars left from the lightning strike. I'd been rewatching some of S3 at the time and I was reminded of how Savitar's scars on the show were part of what marked him as the evil Barry - just some more of the show's casual ableism really. I wanted to write something where Barry had those scars - or similar ones, anyway - and it didn't make him the bad guy.

Once I had that premise, I had to consider what everyone's reactions would be. And that Barry would be pushing away Iris and Joe as much because of their actual reactions to him as well as what Barry was imagining their reactions to him were. Everything always seems worse when your stuck inside your own head, after all, and Barry is very much that here, struggling with the way strangers look at him now and the way he feels about himself when he looks in the mirror.

And then finally I arrived at this scene where Lisa shows up. She's been a bit worried about her shut in neighbor and her concern for him isn't something he can write off as obligation or morbid curiosity. She's just kind when he needs it most. And it was a turning point in accepting himself that Barry needed.

I was really proud of how this fic turned out and that there wound up being more story to tell afterwards. But I think this first one is still my favorite, thanks to the way Lisa and Barry's friendship develops from here.

#kitkatt0430 answers #fic writers meme #40 questions meme for fic writers

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caniwritewhoknows · 2 years

Note

Can I ask for an emergency request when you get the chance?

How would the brothers react/comfort/deal with a gn!mc with major abandonment issues but very low self esteem (because neglectful mother specifically) so mc doesn't say they're struggling but jokes about it a lot but is actually very close to having a breakdown? Also terrified to open up because of possible negative (physical) reaction

Yes I'm projecting lmao hence the emergency request 😅

Have a good day/night!

Sorry this took so long I was cramming for my PSAT just gotta wait for the results. Hope I passed.

Demon Bros w/ an MC With Abandonment Issues

Warnings: Past Truma, Implied Emotional Abuse, Autophobia

Reader: GN

Word Count: 1115

Includes: The Demon Bros

Lucifer 💙

-He's the perspective type so he notices the signs early on

-Your jokes tip him off very easily

-He has six brothers it's hard to get something past him

-He sees the mental break down before it hits so he tries to get you to open up to him before it happens as a preventative measure

-Unfortunately that doesn't work

-This is where he hits a major road block

-Mushy feely stuff has never been his forte

-But when he finds you full blown broken down in despair he pride drops in a an instant

-Your in his arms before you can even realize it

-He wants you to know he's there and not going anywhere

-He'll sit with you as you cry, sob, or what ever

-Once you calm down he'll ask you to talk to him once again

-If you do open up he'll listen the entire time about your mother about every thing and he'll comfort you the best way he knows how the entire time

-If you don't want to talk it will worry him but he has his own issues so he knows it can be though to open up

-No matter what you tell him he'll reassure you that he'll always be there for you and he'll do anything to ensure you know it

Mammon 💛

-This poor idiot

-He knows something is wrong but not how to help

-He tries to help in a backwards tsundere way but it probably only makes things worse

-When you finally break down he's terrified

-He doesn't touch you, he's too scared too

-In that moment he sees you as more fragile than glass

-You've always been fragile in his eyes but now it's so much worse

-He wants to comfort you in any way he can

-It's clumsy but sweet

-Once you've calmed down a bit he'll ask you if you'll explain what made you cry like this

-If you tell him, he'll be furious that someone had hurt you

-If you flinch at his anger he'll sit right back down and try to make himself small, he never means to scare you

-If you don't he'll be worried but he won't push it instead just opting to make sure you know how special you are to him

Leviathan 🧡

-He kinda gets it

-You can't convince me he doesn't have a fear of abandonment

-He gets it but he doesn't get what your jokes really mean

-Once you break downs he's there

-Scared but there

-He's terrified of making the problem worse and expediting the problem

-He tries not to touch you

-In his eyes you've turned to glass

-He reassures you the entire break down telling you he loves you

-He gives you his jacket

-He'll ask what the break down was about once you've calmed

-What you say is 100% up to you and he won't force you to say anything but he will comfort you through anything you do say

Satan 💚

-He knows what autophobia looks like

-He has seen it in you

-Out of all the brothers he is the only one who might be able to stop the break down before it comes

-Cuddling with some books

-Might sneak in a cat

-He'll be very calm while trying to get you to open up

-He'll tell you whats he's noticed about you and he's level headed about it all

-Tell him everything or nothing he just wants you to know he's there for you

-He puts his hatred of Lucifer aside for a bit to ask him to give you some time off

-You guys spend that time off in complete relaxation

-He wants to make you happy and he's willing to get along with Lucifer to do it

Asmodeus 💝

-He knows the impotence of self-care

-So the break down takes awhile thanks to him

-He doesn't do this on accident though he knows what he's doing

- He sees it coming and tries to stop it

-He unfortunately does not succeed

-When the break down comes he is right beside you giving you all the love you didn't get before

-He listens to anything you say and he's there to whole time

-As soon as you've calmed down its a full spa day for you

-He wants to take care of you

-Anything you want to do he'll do it to make you smile

-He'll wait for you to open up to him

-He won't say anything before you do

-Anything you want to tell he'll listen and he won't ask anything more of you

Beelzebub ❤️

-This poor baby

-He feels so much sympathy for you

-No matter how much you joke or smile he's on to you

-He's used to his brothers ways of covering up their issues so you are no surprise

-He sees it coming and wants you to take a break before the break down hits

-If you don't listen to him and break down he'll be there

-No matter how scared you are he's there

-He tries to make himself look small as to not scare you

-He'll listen to everything your willing to say even if that's nothing

-He just wants to see you smile and will hold you and comfort you till he can see it again

Belphegor 💜

-He knows what it's like to have a terrible family dynamic so he catches on

-He doesn't know how to approach you directly so he just starts cuddling you more

-He wants to be near you as often as he can

-He wants to make you feel loved the best he can

-Once the break down finally comes hes there

-For once hes wide awake and there to comfort you

-He'll give you all the love you could ask for

-Once your ready to talk he'll listen whether that a few minutes after the crying end or a few months he's there to listen

-He wants to give you all the reassurance he can

-He can't do anything about the past but he can help the future

-He'll always be there if you need some comfort not matter the time

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bestloversfan · 3 years

Note

Hi! I'm new to the Everlark fandom. Having only finished the books and the movies, I'm now working my way through all the meta I can find. And I love your blog, thank you for providing a thought provoking material.

There's one thing I'd like to read more about, and oddly enough, I haven't seen it covered much in the Everlark meta: Katniss' behaviour (attitude) towards the highjacked Peeta after he had been rescued and returned to her. Have you made analysis post about it, maybe? If so, would you please redirect me there? Or to any other posts you might know on the matter.

This part of the book and Katniss' attitude upset me so much, it felt like she failed Peeta. Failed to be there for him when he needed her the most, and only after Haymitch berated her, she felt ashamed. I was so sad that it took Haymitch to open her eyes, that she didn't find it in her on her own. I'm not saying she owed Peeta romantic affection, love or relationship, but I think she owed him human support and investment - and that she failed to give him. She chose to remove herself completely from the situation and fled. She only got back on track when Peeta started showing definite signs of getting better (after he arrived to the Capitol mission). At that point, I honestly wished for Peeta to heal but for Katniss to live him alone, once and for all. It devastated me so much, that I still cannot get over it. When they got back together in the Epilogue - it was logical and according to Katniss' nature, Gale was right (she needed Peeta to heal, she couldn't function without him, so she stayed with him) - but it felt like she didn't actively choose Peeta, but drifted towards him because he was there. It felt more like it was about what she could take from him than give him (because she loved him). And with the gap that the lack of her support for Peeta created when he was highjacked, this leaves me kind of bitter. I wish this thing was somehow addressed in the the book, but it never was. The films kind of played the whole thing down because in the film we didn't see Katniss' inner thoughts on the matter, which in the books were the worst part of it all.

Don't get me wrong, in the end it's good they grew back together and healed each other, I'm glad. I liked the epilogue, with all the hope it brings. They made each other happy. She made Peeta very happy, and it counts for something.

But my issues about the gap between the highjacked Peeta and the absent Katniss still stand.. And I haven't seen them addressed anywhere. Maybe there's another side to it which I overlook.

Maybe you or your followers don't mind elaborating or redirecting me to the existing discussions on the matter.

Sorry for the long rant and thanks a lot!❤️ I just can't stop thinking about THG and Everlark 😅

Hi! Welcome to THG/Everlark fandom! I'm glad you like my blog. 🥰

As for your question, yes, we've discussed this matter (the way Katniss treated Peeta when he was hijacked). Many times, to be more specific. I'll redirect you to some metas about this topic, but I want to talk about a few things beforehand:

First of all, I understand your upsetness at the way Katniss treated Peeta when he was hijacked. She really didn't treat him fairly, and it was a good thing Haymitch openned her eyes. But you're not considering one thing: She was suffering A LOT. What she did was selfish, but understandable. Can you imagine what it feels like to lose someone you love in the way Katniss lost Peeta? She never wanted to love anyone, because she was afraid of suffering. But she fell in love with Peeta anyway. And then he was ripped away from her, and brainwashed into believing he HATED her. It was so much for her to bear, and she was just a TEENAGER. Also, in the beginning, she couldn't do much to help him in his recovery, because he was a threat to her. He literally tried to kill her, and he couldn't even hear her name without freaking out. So, when we consider all of this, we can empathize with her and understand why she acted the way she did.

As for what you said about her choice for Peeta, I definitely don't agree with that. She didn't choose Peeta just because "she couldn't function without him". She chose him because she loved him, and had been loving him for awhile. What you said suggests she never felt anything for him and only chose him because she was emotionally dependent on him, and it's not true. She started loving him long before that. In Catching Fire, when she said she needed him and kissed him like she never did before, their relationship became 100% real. Nothing she did from that moment on was an act. If it weren't for the hijacking, they surely would have got together a lot sooner.

By the end of MJ, Katniss said she needed Peeta to survive, but it's not to be taken literally. What Suzanne Collins was trying to convey with that passage is that Katniss wasn't choosing only a partner, but also the future she wanted to have. She needed hope, and only Peeta could give her that. Gale couldn't. And yes, she made a choice. She didn't choose Peeta just because "he was there". She chose him because she loved him (don't forget she told him "real"), and needed him. And it would have happened anyway, as she said herself. She could have chosen to be alone (romantically) and to be only friends with Peeta, as they used to be before the Quarter Quell. She could have chosen to be with someone else. She could have chosen to try and approach Gale (she knew he was in d.2. She could have tried to contact him). But she didn't do any of these things. She CHOSE to be with Peeta. Despite all of her fears in regards to romantic relationships, she chose him. And this is one of the many evidences that she loved him. Also, the fact that she only talked about what Peeta could give her in that passage doesn't mean she wasn't willing to give him anything. Throughout the books, she helped him and saved his life so many times. And even when he was hijacked, at some point she recognized her mistake and started helping him in his recovery. She was a flawed person (who isn't?), but she cared deeply about him. And in the epilogue, Peeta said "we have each other", which suggests Katniss was there for him too (I'm pretty sure she was).

Well, this got longer than I intended to (haha!), but I hope I helped you understand these points. Now, as promised, here are the links to the metas:

Meta by @buttercupisbrainless: Link

Meta by @everlarkedalways: Link

Meta by me: Link

Meta by @safeinpeetasarms: Link

There are more metas about this topic, but these are the ones I could find right now. If anyone wants to add another meta, feel free to reblog this post with it. 😉

Thanks for your ask, anon! Feel free to send me an ask whenever you want to know my opinion on something. 😊

#ask #anonymous #katniss everdeen #peeta mellark #everlark #thg #the hunger games

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beautifulterriblequeen · 3 years

Text

The Thief and the Tinker, Part 3: I See Fire

part 2

Part 3

Viren: Well how do you suggest we get him out?

Claudia: *grins, brandishes marshmallow on toasting fork* Unharmed is just another kind of harmed

Viren: Claudia no

Claudia: Claudia YES

I See Fire

Angst rating: 9/10

Viren is clever enough not to take the Silvergrove on alone, no matter how badly he wants Ethari to make him a magic key. Aaravos could be cooking in that pod for a while longer, but Viren still has a trustworthy and badass ally at his side.

Oh yeah, it's Claudia Time again!

Claudia is a powerful and imaginative dark mage, and she has the tainted Sun staff. So, you're the magefam, and you've made it to Xadia, to the edges of the Moonshadow Forest. And all you need to do to get the power of your dreams is to threaten one soft craftsman. But how do you find one specific Moonshadow elf in a hidden Moonshadow village somewhere in the middle of a giant spooky magical forest?

You burn him out.

Credit once again to@random-fandom-ramble for reminding me of this forest fire headcanon, because it fits so well. and so I don't get all the blame for this one, lol

Because see, that's not ordinary fire. Oh, no. That's dark magic fire. We've seen that before. It leaves permanent scars. Remember Sol Regem's eyes?

That's going to be the landscape when Claudia's fire gets through with the Moonshadow elves' home. Where I live on the US West Coast, they name forest fires, and if they combine, they get called complexes. So maybe we can name this fire the Dark Tragedy Complex? Because I do have to wonder... you could start a dark magic forest fire easily with a tainted Sun staff, but how do you put it out?

Two things are going to happen if these events should unfold. One is angsty. The other is also angsty but then amazing.

Firstly, Viren is going to get what he wants. He'll find Ethari, whose tree burned down :(. He'll show him the coins, and he'll offer a trade. Build what he wants and make it work, and Ethari can have his family back, uncoined and free.

And Ethari will say yes.

He'll say yes no matter what anyone else tries to persuade him to do, and I hope they do try, because see: Ethari has to make it look good. He has to make it look like he's all in on Viren's plan, to Viren. Even if that means turning his back on his people in their time of greatest need.

Secondly, the Moonshadow elves are going to be collectively homeless and bereft, hungry, injured, terrified, angry. They will have nowhere to go. They will be a people without a home. And no one else in Xadia will help them. Maybe they're too terrified to hide Ethari's people in case doing so brings Viren down on them, too. We've seen how ordinary elves flee in terror from dark magic. Maybe they're all fighting other issues, too. Viren knows all about stretching resources too far during times of crisis. Whatever the case, there will be no welcome anywhere in Xadia for the Moonshadow elves of the Moonshadow Forest.

But here's where it gets amazing. Because one hand will reach out. One small hand, from across the border. Good King Ezran will stand up on the seat of his throne and say, "You can stay here. I have forests. You're tired, you're hungry. You need medicine. Let me help."

And I'm gonna cry like a little baby.

How many cycles does this break, how many circles does it complete? Moonshadow elves used to live in Katolis before the border was created. When humans were under threat of total annihilation, the Moonshadow leader's daughter spoke up and asked for mercy. That mercy came in the form of land reassignment, and the Moonshadow elves had to give up their ancestral home, their Nexus, and travel east across the new Border. But that mercy got paired with justice, and the life-loving Moon Druids probably had to swear some kind of blood promise to keep an eye on the humans forevermore, and to kill any individuals who got out of hand, as if their sins were the Moonshadows' responsibility now.

That's got to breed a little resentment, a little superiority. "Look what we sacrificed for you, and this is how you act. Ungrateful." And maybe that was partially Luna Tenebris's goal: to hold to her vision of justice, she had to make the elves who shared her arcanum feel a little resentment. Moonshadows love life, but we can't have them being too soft to keep Xadia safe from dark mages, now, can we? I will never stop cackling over dragon politics okay, never

But the Moonshadow elves never figured on King Ezran. A soft boy who refused to let his father's assassination harden his heart, because every life is genuinely important to him. I've seen headcanons for Ezran getting the Sun, Earth, Ocean, and Stars arcanum. How about Moon, too? Because this is very Ethari of him, and if these stories of Viren's plan and the Moonshadow elves' displacement were actually to happen in tandem, the contrast between Ezran's soft choice and Ethari's hard one would be mindblowing.

Ezran completes the circle by inviting the Moonshadow elves to return to Katolis, to their ancestral home. They left long ago, paying the price for an act of mercy, but they were welcomed back by the mercy of humans, repaid after a thousand years, repaid in the face of tragedy. Tragedy on all sides. Tragedy Ezran wants to stop from happening, by being brave and caring and soft, and by being the first to break this thousand-year cycle between Katolis and the Moonshadow elves.

Rayla is his friend. And these are her people. It won't matter what they've done, only that they need help in a time of great desperation. And of course he'll help them. He's Ezran, and he's Katolis's greatest treasure.

Oh, what's that you say? Inviting the Moonshadow elves to settle in Katolis again would make it easier for Rayla to live with Callum in the future? Oh gosh, how about that? What a deal. *smug matchmaker noises*

And once the Moonshadow elves understand that they're safe and begin to trust Ezran--which could happen very quickly, because saving a Moonshadow elf's life when you didn't need to is a really fast way to prove you're trustworthy--maybe Ezran will be encouraged to take the next step toward peace, and eventually other elves and dragons will come to meet together to talk it over. And Ez will offer them jelly tarts, which they will love.

Back to Ethari, because we're not done with him yet. Ethari is soft, but he isn't weak. He won't be a willing pawn for Viren. He loves Runaan to the point of invention, and his devotion is more constant than the moon itself. He'll agree to do what Viren says, and he'll be Very Sad. But his spirit is in no way broken. Viren bribing him with the coins containing his family will only have the opposite effect. It'll give Ethari something to fight for.

We could get Focused Chaos Ethari. We could get Angery Trickster Ethari. We could get Rules, What Rules? Ethari. Let him try to steal the coins, try to break them, try to kill Viren, and be stymied at every turn, until he settles and seems cowed. And then all he does is craft his way out of the problem. What if we are gifted with Iron Man Ethari, who pretends to build a fake Key for Viren, but meanwhile he's really building a coinbuster with whatever he can get his hands on - primal stones, magically imbued gemstones, stolen artifacts, his own arcanum, his own reputation as the Master Craftsman of the Silvergrove. He'll use almost- almost - anything, to stop Viren and free his family.

Ethari may have to choose between those two things, though. And he's a hero, deep down, just like his family, just like his daughter. If he has to choose, he'll choose to stop Viren and save Xadia. He'll pay the same price as his family has if he must.

He'd let Viren think he was motivated purely by wanting his family back, but Ethari is far too steeped in the illusion and sacrifice for that to be all there is to his motives. It's a so-close-and-yet-so-far thing, how he and Viren almost embody the same ideals. Almost. Ethari would take one look at Viren, who just burnt down his whole Forest, he'd see the biggest threat in Xadia, and he'd say anything to get a chance to stop this juggernaut of destruction from getting his hands on whatever that ultimate power really is, locked behind that missing key. If he has to abandon his people and bawl his eyes out to convince Viren he's in, then he will.

And Viren wouldn't make it easy for him. He knows clever when he sees it. He went through all this trouble to persuade Ethari to work with him. He would need to keep Ethari as off-balance as possible to ensure that he keeps working as he should.

Angsty jewelry, anyone: Viren giving Ethari his husband in pendant form to remind him what he's working for, when Viren and Ethari both know full well that only dark magic can open the hellcoins. Ethari wearing another pendant of his love, except it's not a metaphor this time. It's literally his love, in a coin around his neck.

Viren would know that Ethari would have to stay close to Viren of his own free will if he ever hoped to free Runaan. And making people bind themselves to you is a big power flex. Remember that TDP stream future-season teaser note about Bait being in a creepy restraint in a future season?

This card is written on in all-caps, so that really could be "Bait" or "bait," or--knowing this show--both. Viren's been using Runaan as bait for Ethari all along. Putting his coin in a dark magic pendant casing for Ethari to wear would be a great parallel for that. Oh god. Oh man.

Maybe he'll stab the coin's scary casing right through that circle on Ethari's chest, right over his heart, make that Iron Man reference really obvious. Ethari also losing his shirt at some point, for angsty Viren-related reasons? It's more likely than you think. I mean... Ethari is literally involved in both forms of forging at this point. Shirt's gotta come off for uhhhh work reasons. And because he's hot. Because of all the forging. I mean how else are we finally going to discover what his markings look like

I mentioned that I liked god-tier villains, right? Yeah, this is amazing. I haven't wanted to die and ascend over an idea for quite a while, but Ethari vs Viren in a drawn-out battle of wills would kill me in the best way. Especially since, while it looks like they're essentially fighting for who gets Runaan, they're truly fighting a much larger battle with much higher stakes. They're fighting for the future itself. It's an epic struggle between the Narrative of Strength and the Narrative of Love. And we've seen what happens, over and over, when the Narrative of Strength gets to call the shots.

On a meta note: If Runaan and Ethari's story arc isn't a love letter from one trauma survivor to another, and on a broader scope to all survivors who see it, I don't know what is. Sometimes life just chews us up and spits us out and we can't stop it and it breaks us. But sometimes we can reach out and grasp the chance to help each other, even after that, even when it hurts a lot, because we know what it means to be loved, and to love, and to want a safer future for each other and for people we'll never meet. The future is worth standing together for, helping each other back up for, fighting side by side for, even if you can't see how it'll end, or even how to begin. We are stronger together, and sometimes we need to fight for our "together" before we can fight for anything else. And that's worth it, every time.

This is glorious, it's beautiful, it's tragic, it's amazing, it makes me want to dance, it makes me want to scream into the void, it makes me want to slap someone with a semi truck. No, someone specific, don't worry, and he super deserves it.

Because Ethari is going to win. He was always going to win. He's soft, and he's clever, and he hasn't forgotten what love means. It's what he's fighting for. Not power, not control. Love. He doesn't want to dictate Runaan's future, or anyone else's. He just wants his husband--and everyone else--to have one at all.

So he's going to win.

What beating Viren looks like, I can't guess yet. TDP is no stranger to angst, so there will probably be a high cost involved in thwarting the dark mage. Maybe not everyone can be rescued from the coins. Maybe Ethari will lose his life, or his soul, or his vision, or something else really angsty. Viren could even kill him and resurrect him as a smoky craftsman, or a zombie craftsman, or something equally biddable but horrible. The only thing I'm sure of is that Ethari would never willingly make a working Key of Aaravos Ethari as long as there's a chance Viren could possess it. But I do believe that if he gets the right opportunity while he's busy saving the world from Viren's dark intentions, he'll break his husband's hellcoin open somehow and set him free, even if he has to smile at the devil to do it.

part 4

#tdp #tdp theory #tdp speculation #tdp parallels #viren #ethari #laindrin #runaan #moonshadow elves #moonshadow assassins #hopepunk #tdp angst #heavy angst #tw trauma

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anextraordinarymuse · 3 years

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I'm just gonna go ahead and make a new post to respond to your points Katie (@jonesgirl88) so that we're not constantly reblogging and trying to load all of those gifs.

Jump to the DLO dance: there is a war going on in Oliver's head and the fact Eric can act that so we can see it? Brilliant. Chef's kiss. He's so torn and you can feel it and your heart breaks for both of them. He's holding her hand to his heart but Shane is also physically on his right side. Her chin is nearly resting on his right shoulder and he's pulled her close to his right side. What say you?

I noticed this too, of course. But first - Eric and Kristin deserve awards. All of the awards. They act beautifully, and they play off of each other so well - they're wonderful scene partners. Okay anyway. Yes, Shane is physically on his right side and has many points of contact along that side (like you said, her chin is nearly on his shoulder) but I pointed out their hands specifically because they are originally positioned away from their bodies. Shane and Oliver's physical closeness is a given in this moment because dancing is intimate. It requires that a lot of you be in contact with a lot of your partner. But originally Oliver and Shane's hands are extended away from them until Oliver pointedly draws them in and places Shane's hand over his heart. This movement is unnecessary in the context of ... well, anything. It's a purely instinctive and intimate move. He could have simply let go of her hand, or drawn it closer and then held it in some other position, but no: he pulls it right in against him. That's why I included it. I'm sure that it was included in the blocking and written in to the script because we're meant to notice it.

I could write for days about that DLO dance scene. THE. FREAKING. CHEMISTRY. I blush ridiculously easily (seriously it's A Problem and I hate it) and I would have been crimson that whole time if I were Kristin. The Tenderness. The Tension. The way his eyes dart back and forth right before he lets her go because he's so at war with himself: kiss her or let her go? O.Y.E.

They're standing in a line (because they're being given awards) but he's turning towards her and she's turning towards him. I just...I can't with these two.

This is totally A Thing©. Shane and Oliver both have a tendency to turn in toward each other like that - but especially Shane. It's an unconscious attempt to take refuge in Oliver and his strength, I think. She often does it in times when she's seeking comfort and closeness/affection. That moment where Shane is sleeping on Oliver's shoulder is one my favorite moments of it, but there's another one that's a small moment (that apparently was either filmed in a longer moment and cut, or aired as a longer moment/actual hug in one of the international versions).

Right before the scene fades into the next one we see Shane turn herself even more into Oliver's left side and tuck her head, as if she's going to bury her face in his shoulder. I wish we'd been gifted with more of this moment! Look at the way she tucks her arm into him and tips her head - she even kind of pushes her hip into his side. I just love this moment a lot.

1) Shane is shown to be freaking out when closed in the vault. Her fear seems to trigger at odd times? She's fine when she learned there's 13 hours of air; she's fine when she learns there's actually less than 5 hours of air; she's fine when she's bored and wants to play a game; but Katherine might be dead so she freaks out? I get it, she believes their fate to be tied together but then why wasn't she more fearful before they started reading the letters? It just doesn't make a lot of sense.

I think for a large part of this Shane was doing a good job of distracting herself and focusing on something else. But reading the letters made them both emotional: they connected with something poignant in those letters. They're reading about two people who fall in love despite their circumstances and share something beautiful even if it's only words - and then find out at the end that these two people may not have actually been able to be together. Not only does that mirror their situation, but all of a sudden it seems like they might never have the chance to be together either (to Shane) because, oh yeah, they're also in danger of not breathing anymore - and I think that just brought her fear to the surface. Also, it's a small moment, but Shane wasn't too thrilled about having to go into the vault at all. When she first sees it she hesitates and says "in there?" like she'd rather not go anywhere near it. I always took it as a small nod to the fact that Shane might not have a love of small spaces. We've never seen it mentioned again though, so who knows.

I know it's part of the story but he literally just wrote he's willing to give things with Holly another chance but then spends his time thinking of Shane when reading the letters.

Yes! And I have always taken this as another indication that, at this point, Oliver is saying what he feels he should have said long ago. He's making the effort he feels duty bound to make. I mean, I think part of him does want to put in the effort - but that part is his head. His rational mind, and probably his memories of Holly and his affection for her, and the importance he puts on his marriage vows. This is another reason why I truly don't think his heart is with Holly anymore, or in his marriage. AT NO POINT after he writes that letter and tucks it away does he think of Holly. He's reading powerful, moving love letters between two people and the only person he thinks about is Shane? And - we don't find this out until later, but still - the letter he does write to Holly isn't that romantic. He promises to try to see her dreams through her eyes, and says that he's willing to change, but there's nothing about how much he loves her or how her absence has affected his heart or his life. Maybe because Oliver didn't really believe when he was writing it that he was in danger? I don't know. But it's interesting.

That hand grab!! ... And then the way she looks at him as he sings along at the end when Rita wins?? I can't with this man. I can't with this woman.

Um, yes. Shane takes Oliver's hand and he just ... short circuits. It's hilarious. And they're so smitten with each other it's ridiculous.

And in that hospital scene, Oliver absolutely would have let anyone sleep on his shoulder like that. But it wasn't anyone: it was Shane, and it was Shane after all of the emotional intimacy they shared in The Treasure Box; and, once again, it was Shane turned into his side like Oliver offered to let her lay her head there, or she knew what she was doing when she did, because she's not facing forward in the chair with her head to one side like she just accidentally fell asleep and then her head sort of slid to one side. She's angled her body into his. Her feet are pointing toward him. Her hand is just under/next to his arm. How did they get to that moment? I NEED TO KNOW.

(I always understood Jordan to just be an angel. Definitely open to interpretation though.)

OLIVER IS THE ANSWER TO HER LETTER. His words, his faith, his person is the answer to Shane's childhood prayer she never forgot. He opens the wound but it's destined he's the one to help her heal.

Oliver is the embodiment of Shane's hope. Jordan couldn't answer her letter because it had to be Oliver, which he realized. And before he leaves the chapel he says to Oliver "take good care of that little letter writer." HE'S TALKING ABOUT SHANE. In the Impossible Dream, Shane tells Oliver that he's given her something she'll never forget: "a little hope for this world." Oliver. Is. Shane's. Hope. Oh my gosh! She's his heart, he's her hope. How tooth-rottingly, disgustingly sweet. I love it.

Extra point: Kristin can rock a leather skirt...like hot damn woman.

A) she always looks so good, but yes, this leather skirt and periwinkle/lavender top is one of my favorite looks on her, and B) I love her fashion and style and aspire to be that fashionable one day.

Holly and Oliver try to have a conversation with words and they fail.

This literally just occurred to me: Holly herself points out that she and Oliver suck at having actual conversations. Physically they click, so they obviously had a lot of chemistry, but they struggle to just talk to one another. Juxtapose that with Shane, who literally understands Oliver so well and on such a deep level that she not only understands him when no one else does, she can actively translate him. The reunion in HG instantly comes to mind here. She translates in real time for the audience what Oliver means ("And I might be the only person on Earth who understands what you just said!") But she also translates what he says for their waitress in OIAM ("Oh, he just means that people weren't having their booshes (or however you spell that) amused in the 20th century.")

In the Pilot and The Masterpiece, things get McSteamy so quickly but it never starts out that way ... He's trying for the sake of his marriage one last time but his head and heart aren't in it.

Exactly! The pull between him and Shane is magnetic. It's natural and impossible to ignore. This is why I maintain that even if Holly had changed her mind and asked to work on their relationship it never would have worked. Oliver was in love with Shane by this point even if he wouldn't say it or wasn't ready to acknowledge it (although Jordan played a part in making Oliver more aware of this truth. Hard to ignore when a freaking angel points out to you how important someone is to you.)

To Holly, kissing Oliver is akin to breaking promises to herself ... To Shane, kissing Oliver is akin to keeping promises.

Well, you just blew my mind. This is so true! Holly tells us that the only way she could see to live her dream was to stop kissing Oliver (insinuating that it was also to leave him behind); Shane's dream seems to just be ... Oliver. Sharing a life with him; delivering dead letters with him; loving him.

BRB, sobbing over this stupid show and these idiots in love.

I do think that Holly and Oliver parted amicably. I can't decide if I think that Holly asked about Shane, or if she made a comment about her (directly or indirectly). I kind of feel like Holly was more the type to make a comment than ask a question.

I am dying over the logistics of Oliver actually buying that porch swing. Well dressed Oliver scouring the aisles of Walmart at like midnight for the perfect porch swing while surrounded by a bunch of people in their pajamas and college kids on middle of the night snack runs because they're marathoning TV shows instead of studying? Hilarious. Headcanon accepted.

Back to the topic at hand...I do think some of the left/right stuff is purely ease of blocking

As do I. I'm definitely reading more into it than I'm meant to at some points, there's just SO MUCH of it and it's so fun to contemplate that I went for it.

THE HUG IN TRUTH BE TOLD.

hahahahahahaaa ... the way that Shane literally just drops everything and wraps her arms around him slays me. The stunned little pause where Oliver's arms are just up in the air for a second, as if he's somehow surprised at the force of her hug despite having watched her move toward him, and then he tentatively puts his arms on her back and then ... he holds her a little tighter. Ugh. UGH. I DIE.

CAN WE TALK ABOUT OLIVER IN FLANNEL WITH THE SLEEVES ROLLED UP??

Yes. A million times, yes. Oliver with his sleeves rolled up? Outstanding. Oliver in flannel? An absolute vision. Oliver in flannel with his sleeves rolled up? I C A N N O T.

There will be more. I need to make the gifs, but there's going to be a part 4. And probably 5. In fact, I think this is just going to become a series of Things I Need To Scream About™ with supporting gif evidence.

I'll try to break it up though, so there's just ShOliver stuff, just Shane stuff, and just Oliver stuff. And then all Postables stuff because they're the cutest little Postal family ever.

#oliver x shane #shane x oliver #sholiver #Jess' thoughts #look at us bringing life to these tags lol #in my head it's just you and me in this little room freaking out together about these idiots Katie #like every once in a while someone opens the door and it's just us #squealing at each other and flailing #and whoever it is just closes the door and backs away quietly like #nope not going in there

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gingus-doon · 3 years

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pov u just shot your childhood hero, wdyd

i.e. i ramble about keiji post-shooting; his occupation, what he does, how he copes, how he feels, etc. etc.

just putting this little thing here because the post got quite long and i couldn't split it up because it's all somewhat related. it started out as a rant / informal ramble but then it got serious lololol

—

one thing i don't understand is why people hc keiji as still having a job with the police post-shooting? like that just doesn't make sense to me– not only based on his character but like... why would you wanna make him a cop with all the talk of how much the police suck lately? personally i'm a brown bitch so i couldn't be down with thirsting over a cop lol. it's just kinda confusing sjdhd

i've seen the hc of him as a private investigator, though, which i like! it's a very neat way to let him flex his detective skills without being part of a corrupt organization and without forsaking his own personal beliefs and feelings about the police, because i don't think those would change anywhere near easily and i just kinda can't see him going back into the police force because of that.

i have often wondered what keiji would do after the death game, and what he was doing before the death game or after the shooting, because i think he'd definitely quit after the shooting, with all the grief and trauma surrounding the job and his newfound cynicism.

i don't think he'd be doing private investigation before the game, or more specifically, before his character develops into something reminiscent of his old self– as he is at the start of the game, he just doesn't have that faith in protection, so i can't imagine him being an investigator at that point. HOWEVER, in a post death game OR non-death game au where keiji has started to pull himself up from that tar (most likely with the help of others lol) i think that's definitely a plausible option for him and i like it a lot :]

as for other options, though... i really don't know! this is more of a stupid idea but i considered him working in a convenience store like shin lol. i had a whoooole au about him, kai, and shin working in the same convenience store just because they can't hold down any other jobs / don't know what else to do for work. shin is able to actually hold down the job because the last manager was mysteriously taken out of commission (i don't know lol) and they were ridiculously short-staffed already so shin ended up being the "most qualified" for the now vacant position. keiji's had a string of odd jobs since the police and this is just the next one. he's hoping to find something with a better wage but this'll do for now, it's even in walking distance from his apartment. and kai, kai's trying to exercise more independence from the chidouins' after becoming his own person! so he gets what i think would be his first job (well, his first official job, anyway... being an assassin and the chidouins' personal maid were more unofficial gigs lol.) ahh that was a lotta rambling about my dumb little au but i just think it'd be neat, they're three of my favourite characters so having them just vibe with each other at work and become friends sounds nice 2 me :] also Coincidentally i ship literally every combination of those three characters so that may have played a part in my casting decisions lmfao

oh wow that was a really long and uncalled for synopsis but this is just a rambly post so it can't really be uncalled for because this post doesn't have any particular point lol (A/N after writing this— IT HAS A POINT NOW, DISREGARD PAST ME)

SO ANYWAY ! i was just considering what keiji would do right after the shooting. honestly i have noooo idea, it's the beginning of a long road of him burying his trauma in a desperate attempt to avoid facing the pain it brings, and it marks a profound loss of innocence which makes his heart begin to grow cold. it's just hard to see the beginning of the process when where he started and where he ended up are very different places.

obviously, he'd quit his job. i wonder if the hallucinations would start right away? him being naïve in the beginning, i'm sure he'd acknowledge them– cry out apologies and plead for forgiveness until his throat is hoarse. the rule of hallucinations in yttd seems to be that if you acknowledge them, they'll burn themselves into your brain and you'll never be rid of them– implying that keiji has done so, as it's likely been years since the shooting and he's still suffering from the visions despite seeming to ignore them now.

ahh, i'm getting in my feelings about keiji now 😭😭 when i started this, i wanted to be held by him, but now i just wanna hug him like damnnnn

but back to what he'd do after the shooting– this scenario is self indulgent, but wouldn't it be nice if he took some time off and just stayed at his mom's place for a while? help her with chores while she's at work, try to regain a sense of normalcy in his childhood home...

i don't think he'd be able to do this right after the shooting. keiji had shame, once upon a time– the guilt would rack him like nothing else. i can imagine him spending a lot of late nights with alcohol, just wishing it was a dream. his resentment towards megumi slowly building as he feels he's being left in the dark as to why, why he isn't allowed to atone, why she's being so cold towards him about the shooting when he's suffering so heavily from the effects of it.

he wouldn't want to be around his dear mom as a murderer, and as a resentful alcoholic who's coping very poorly with his circumstances.

also (tangent incoming), i kind of wonder about keiji and alcohol a lot. in his fondness events with mishima, he says the following—

the "haven't drank that much in years" part makes me wonder– for how long? did he start to restrain himself before the shooting or after? i would say it's most likely after, considering the "feels like it'll swallow me up" comment he made soon after. and, how he talked about binge drinking when he was still a newbie. perhaps it was fine for him to do so, before the shooting— he'd just get wasted and flirt, have a good time. but after, it morphed into an inefficient coping mechanism which he fell far within the depths of to try and control the worst of his grief and self hatred. after that, heavy drinking couldn't just be for fun anymore.

i assume in the "before it got this way" comment, the "way" he's referring to is how he doesn't drink much anymore? or, he could be talking about the depression drinking, but i think the prior makes more sense.

even though i think, given keiji's example of drinking with megumi, that he could have gotten blackout drunk a couple of times purely for fun pre-shooting, i think here he's referring to the painful side of his relationship with alcohol here, the part that took place when he was trying to cope with his trauma. i think he brings up the story of drinking with megumi immediately after, then, to avoid talking about that part of his past. though he doesn't show it much, i think he's deeply ashamed of himself. not only of what he's done, but how he's handled it afterwards.

on a lighter note, though, it's quite funny to think of Lawful Good young keiji shinogi getting drunk off his ass and flirting with every woman he comes across willing to flirt back. like, what's up with that??? he seems like such a serious dork in the flashbacks, but doing well in his police job, he just... lets loose?? no no, honestly i think he hadn't drank much before going out with megumi and he took her insistence on him drinking a little too far, and with his inexperience with alcohol and the successive lack of self restraint that comes with each new drink, you get casanova shinogi, lmao.

BACK TO THE SERIOUS STUFF THOUGH !! i really like the idea of him going to his mom to help him pull himself back together. i think they'd have a solid relationship, fight me! he seems to adore his mom as a child with a good single parent usually does. i'm sure he appreciates her immensely for all the care and love she managed to give him when he was a kid while also working her ass off to support them financially. this very respect for her is what i think would drive him to isolate himself from her after the shooting– as i said above, he's a murderer now. a disappointing human being in general, and an even worse son. to let down his mother who worked so hard to raise him right... how could he? as his condition worsens and his heart grows colder, i'm sure that feeling would fester inside of him. he'd try to ignore it, as he does with everything else, but it's already wrapped its tendrils around his soul. that particular guilt isn't leaving him any time soon.

now that i'm thinking about it, also, i don't think it's likely that he'd quit his job right right away. it'd be more of a slow descent over the span of a few weeks. immediately after the shooting, he may stop showing up to work for a while. he just can't put on that uniform when it's practically caked in the blood of someone he held in such high esteem for so long. eventually, though, he gets a hold on himself– just a bit. he doesn't want to be cooped up in his apartment with his thoughts anymore, and he doesn't want to lose his job. what else would he do?

so, he takes it easy on the first few days back. megumi tries to make it easy for him. paperwork, whatever job he could do that's not on the field. he clings to her like a wounded puppy, hoping that she'll explain why she's covering it up when he doesn't want her to, what he's supposed to do with these feelings around the incident. he's drowning, and she's made herself a big sister figure to him– she's supposed to help him. but, she shrugs him off when he brings it up. she's so harsh about it compared to how she usually speaks to him. perhaps because of her own guilt around the incident, perhaps it's the family's response and how keiji is now, how panicked and sleep deprived the poor kid has looked since that day.

so he continues to spiral with nothing to hold on to. grasps at alcohol in a futile attempt to stop falling, because it's all he can think to fall back on. he's a wreck at work– he's barely living, much less working. but megumi tries her best to keep him from getting fired. she'll get him coffee and breakfast and try to say something encouraging. "hey. hang in there, shinogi." with a touch on the shoulder. but in spite of her efforts, of course, it hits a breaking point. everyone in the job thinks keiji's too damaged to continue, saying he either needs to see a shrink or get the hell out of the way and let everyone else do their job.

and keiji just stops coming into work one day.

the downward spiral ensues.

#your turn to die #keiji shinogi #yttd keiji #kimi ga shine #i really just wrote this much just about keiji like goddamn. calm down @ me #it's not that much tho i checked and it's like not even 2000 words 😔😔#i got sad writing some of the angstier parts of this. like keiji... my darling.... let me hug him #i feel like there's a lot to be said about ~after the shooting~ and the process of him becoming the man he is now #there's lotsa speculation about that here from me specifically lol #i'd kinda kill to read a fic that goes into this stuff! no ship or anything just keiji. and megumi and his mom #i wonder if it exists 👀👀👀 but there are few things without ships that exist....#anyway i love keiji more now somehow #i am super keiji simp trust #i am tired tho lol i think i'll sleep now. maybe #OH ALSO!!! it's very fitting that the last line mentions the downward spiral #because i was thinking of the nin album by that title earlier today #specifically keiji and a certain track. I WILL NOT SAY WHICH TRACK. YOU DO NOT NEED TO KNOW

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