#I'm very emotionally invested in this family
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Never letting you go (Max Verstappen)
There was nothing stopping you and Max now
Note: english is not my first language. This is the first Max big piece to sort of introduce their arc, let me know what you think! ✨️
Thank you so much to everyone who likes and reblogs, your feedback is appreciated 🤍 and I'm taking requests so if you have any ideas or concepts you want to share, feel free to do so as I'll try to get to them the best I can!
my masterlist
Tw: mentions Jos forbidding Max and reader of dating, curse words
Tag list: @myloverjk-blog
"What do you mean you're going to the Grand Prix?", you quirked your brow as your friend Cara sipped her coffee, "I thought you said you'd never be caught dead one of those", you chuckled.
"Matthew's company got a bunch of passes because they got a deal with one of the sponsors - I think? - I don't know much about it, all I know is that he brought three home because he thought you'd like to join us", she offered.
You never hid how much you enjoyed watching Formula One, even if watching it, especially in the last couple of years, often brought emotionally heavy memories back.
"That's nice, count me in! What type of passes are they?", you questioned, taking a bite from the cake on your plate.
"I don't know, he was talking all about them and I must admit I zoned out", she admitted, "but he said they were really good! He was very surprised at what the passes had, but his boss is very cheap so I don't know how great they actually are considering the possible comparison", she smiled as you nodded, "count me in, though. It's been a while since I stepped foot on one of them", you recalled.
The last race you attended was when Max was in Formula Three still. The paddock was so big and crowded with so many people, you doubted you'd bump into him. It wouldn't do you any good, would it?
"How did you get hospitality passes?", you gasped as Matthew handed you the lanyard, "they've invested a lot of money so I guess the sponsors didn't mind loosening the belt", he shrugged, putting his own around his neck after scanning it.
"Thank you for this, by the way", you flashed him a smile, "no worries, Y/N, the only way I could convince her to come was if you joined us, and I don't mind actually spending the weekend with someone who also knows a little about the sport", he chuckled as Cara laced her arms with her fiancé, "I'm glad he has you to talk to as well, there's only so much feigned interest I can muster up", she rolled her eyes.
Scuderia Alpha Tauri had been Toro Rosso, but despite the name change, as soon as you walked in, some faces were still familiar from the pictures you got sent from Max on gia first season with them.
"Why did you get interested in Formula One anyway?", Matthew asked you while you sipped on a latte, "I always loved the idea of the cars going very very fast, and then when I actually had the knowledge to understand how they worked, they really intrigued me", you offered, "I also had a friend who was very into it, so he also escalated my interest in it".
"He didn't pull you enough to work on motor sport though?", Matt wondered.
"I didn't enjoy the competitiveness of all of it", you admitted, "it's very strict, and if you want to be successful, it takes the good things away - your family, your friends", you opened your heart to him, thankfully noticing it and sorting the heartfelt confession seemingly about a job, "they travel a lot and they're really competitive that is, I'd never be able to do that for a job", you smiled, hoping you saved yourself from further questions.
"That's why you did mechanical engineering, then?", he asked, "for the most part, yes", you replied, "Oh, they're starting free practice", you smiled, looking over to the track from the balcony seats.
Sophie walked into the RedBull hospitality, looking for her family. Because it was Monaco, they felt safe enough to bring the Lio and Luka to the paddock, knowing they would be close to home in case things didn't go well as planned.
"Grandma!", the oldest boy called her from his spot on his father's lap, his brother sleeping on his mother's chest.
"Hey, my dears", she greeted, "You won't believe who I found on my way here", Sophie began, "I'm surprised Max didn't tell me he invited Y/N. It's a shame she isn't here with us, though", she commented.
The first indicator of surprise should be the way the blond woman looked at her mother, "what do you mean Y/N is here?", she whisper-yelled.
"I just saw her in the Alpha Tauri hospitality, I was walking with Helmut and he was headed there, that's when I noticed her. Max didn't tell you?", she quirked an eyebrow just as her son sat down next to them.
"What didn't I tell who?", Max spoke, setting his plate of food down on the table.
"Why didn't you tell us you invited Y/N for this weekend?", Victoria was the first to scold him, hitting his arm in a sisterly manner, "and in Alpha Tauri of all places? I'm sure they would've bent the rules a little and give you a pass so she could be a RedBull guest!".
Max thought he heard incorrectly. Y/N, his Y/N was in the paddock, in the sister team of the one he now drove for.
"I, I didn't offer her anything", Max said, his brother in-law looking at him weirdly as well, "I don't know how or why she is here, but I had nothing to do with it. We haven't spoken in a while", he mumbled. A while, three years, same thing, he supposes.
"Well, I just saw her. You should go say hi, I'm sure she would love to but she can't exactly find you where she is, it has to be the other way around", Sophie offered.
"What makes you believe she would?", Max questioned, both himself and his mother and sister.
"Because the way you never forgot her, she never forgot you", Victoria sterned, "don't you think she deserves your attention? She was in it for the long run, Max, and maybe she has moved on, maybe even has someone", the thought alone made Max loose his cool, "but she was your friend, the person you trusted most in the world and you let her slip".
"Don't sugar coat it, please", Max sarcastically replied.
"It's true, Max, and you know it", Sophie said, sensing her son didn't want to talk about the topic, but not allowing him to leave the table without a piece of her mind as well.
Max needed to put on his suit again, ready for qualifying, walking along the corridor until he found his door.
"Hey, before you go", Victoria called her brother as he was about to go into his driver's room, "Lio is really fussy, so we're just going back to your place, I'm sorry", she said.
"It's fine, whatever you feel the most comfortable with", he said, waving at his nephews and brother in-law.
"We will be supporting you from home, then", she said, kissing his cheek, "And Max? I know you're not used to it, but follow your heart", she smiled.
"Can I do that now?", he softly bit back, smiling and blushing at his words.
"What's stopping you?", Victoria said as she walked back to her family.
"Who is that?", Jos asked as Max asked him if he could invite you over for dinner before the season began.
The conversations with Toro Rosso were getting serious and the opportunity for a seat in Formula One was right there, up for him to grab if he worked enough.
"She's my friend, you know Y/N", Max tried to reason with his father.
"For this to work, Max, I think you need to distance yourself from home", Jos advised, ignoring his mention of you and carrying on with his lecture, "I'm talking no parties, no trips to come and see friends and family - I really think those are just getting in the way between you and the career you deserve".
The statement was clear, and Max knew better than to question it.
"I've spoken to your mother - she wasn't the biggest fan -, but you really need to focus on this", Jos reiterated, "no friends, much less girlfriends", he chuckled.
The dinner ended up being just Jos, Max and Victoria, the thought of having you there quickly erased in his head.
When Max met up with you before he left for the season, he was antsy. Just a week before, you had stolen innocent kisses from eachother's lips and revelled in the feeling of being in eachother's embrace without a care in the world. And it felt good, so good, like the piece that was missing in Max's life finally completed the puzzle.
"Hey", you greeted, kissing the corner of his lips and allowing him to pull you down to sit on the sofa.
"I spoke to my dad, I'm leaving in a few days", Max said, "there's some testing they want me to do still", he mumbled, lacing your fingers in his.
"And where do we end up?", you asked the million euro question. Truthfully, you entertained the thought. Even though being away from Max for most of the year would be a challenge, the love you felt for him was too big, too great for you to forgo that challenge. You were his and he would be yours.
"It's not going to work, Y/N. I need to focus on racing", he stated blankly despite how much it hurt him to utter those words out to you as the conversation with his father resonated with him.
"Max your focus is getting a Formula One seat", his father sterned, "do you know how hard it is? How much effort and work you have to put in? There can't be any distractions!"
"But Y/N isn't a distraction!", Max reasoned. If anything, you were the one keeping him humble and with both feet on the ground at all times. You cared for him, not because of his racing, who he was or who he could become, but because you loved eachother.
You'd never do anything to ruin his career, Max thought as he worked up the courage to tell you all of it. He couldn't get distracted, not now. He couldn't afford making mistakes because he had a girlfriend back at home waiting on him.
Your understanding, however, wasn't aligned with his expectations. He hoped you'd fight, at least, but you swalled your tears and nodded, "okay, Max. I hope you get your seat, you deserve it so much, I know it will happen".
Max put in on pole, leaving you to smile and snap a picture of the moment, wondering if you'd have the courage to send it to him.
"So, does this mean it's over?", Cara asked, "Because I could do with going home, actually", she nudged.
"Let's go, then!", you smiled, putting your phone in your bag and looking for the way out, ending up following the other guests into the paddock.
"Y/N, dear!", you heard someone call your name, and on cue, you looked for the voice despite the fact that it wad unlikely someone recognised you there.
Sophie didn't age, you thought, as you looked at the source of the voice that called you.
"I'm not going to hold you up, guys, you can go!", you smiled, waving at Matthew and Cara once you assured them you would be fine.
"I'm sorry, Sophie - they're my friends, and he was the one who got the passes from his office", you apologised for leaving her to wait a little for you.
"It's alright, dear. It's been so long since I've seen you", she nudged, "I'm sure Max would love to see you, too!", she jumped straight in.
"Would he, though?", you squinted your eyes.
"He would, Y/N", Sophie said earnestly, "I saw you this morning - at Alpha Tauri -, and he knows you're here", she smiled, "I'm assuming you're watching the race, too. Pay him a visit, okay?", she rubbed your shoulder and left a kiss on your cheek, "He's also my ride home, so I need to go look for him! Bye, Y/N!".
Race day meant rush everywhere, so you got to the paddock just in time before everyone rushed inside, finding the perfect spot to watch the race.
"I need to take this call, one second", you said to Cara, recognising Max's contact on your phone.
"Y/N, hi! I didn't think you'd pick up actually", you could hear the nervousness on his voice, "thanks for the picture, by the way, it was very... nice".
"It's no problem really, I thought it would be a good memory to keep", you smiled, "are you ready for the race? Or do you want me to give you a pep talk?", you chuckled. Back in the day, whenever he didn't feel too confident about a race, you had the power to help him out his head in the right place and bring his winning mentality to light.
"I'm fine, actually", he smiled, "I- I was wondering if you'd like to meet up later", he gulped, "I'd like to talk to you, but it's difficult until the race finishes, and then debriefs and media and all that".
"Sure, text me when you're done then", you stated boldly, "have a good race Max, you know I'm supporting you".
"Even if you're with Alpha Tauri?", he joked.
"I never stopped supporting you, it's not going to be a guest pass that's going to change it", you said as he bid you goodbye, ending the call and finding your friends.
When Max won, you clapped unashamedly as everyone else seemed to join you in your excitement, and after the race celebrations were done with, you waited patiently for the text to get to your phone.
"So you're staying back?", Cara asked, "I am, I'm meeting a friend", you explained. At her curious stare, you furthered, "do you remember the guy I told you about when you tried to set up that double date?", she nodded, "yes, the guy you were friends with, and when you both wanted to take a step forward, he had this big shot as his dream career and his father wouldn't allow him to date anyone", she said as she realized, "my goodness, he's here? Y/N, go for it!", she encouraged, "I know you still have feelings for him, who knows? Maybe this is your chance to reconnect", she rubbed your shoulder.
After you bid goodbye to Cara and Matthew, a text go through to your phone.
From: Max
Mum is waiting for you at the door :)
Approaching the hospitality, you quickly spotted Sophie, "c'mon in, dear! Max wanted me to get you myself, he was afraid no one would ler you in", she chuckled, guiding you through until you were in their dining area.
"Y/N!", Max beamed, setting down the crayons he was drawing with at the table with Luka and walking up to you.
"Hey everyone!", you waved at Victoria, putting a pin the two little boys' curious stares as they looked at you so you could hug Max.
"Congratulations, Max, I knew you could do it", you whispered into his skin, his arms hugging you so tightly against him.
"Thank you, Y/N", he spoke, "I missed you so much, I missed this so much", he squeezed you one more time before allowing you to greet the rest of his family.
"This is Tom, and that's Lio and Luka", Victoria said after she hugged you tighlty, "say hi, guys!", she encouraged as the two little copies of Max waved back at you.
"We're going to head home, it was great seeing you, Y/N!", Sophie announced, "I'm sure we'll see eachother a lot more from now on", Victoria complimented, helping her husband pack up the kids' belongings and toys so they could retire to Max's apartment.
"I was wondering if you wanted to have dinner sometime this week", he jumped straight forward, "I'm having dinner with the team today and then the rest of the grid want to go to the club, so I wouldn't be able to spend that much time with you, and I want to be able to just focus on you", he smiled.
"That's fine by me, I appreciate the thought", you smiled as he led you to one of the tables, asking one of the caffé staff for something to drink for the two of you.
“Listen, I think, I think we found each again for a reason", he began boldly, not sure if this was the way to go after not having spoken to you in a couple of years. Still, it wasn't a lie.
"Define found, considering we've been iving in the same city for nearly a year", you smiled, "although you don't spend much time here anyway, so I guess that's a nice enough excuse", you teased, your foot tapping his shin playfully under the table.
"So, Monaco, hm?", Max started, "I didn't expect you to live here out of all places", he nudged, wanting to know more about your move but afraid he was stepping in vulnerable territory.
"I did it because of my earnings for sure. I've got to save as much as I can on tax on the fortune I make as a female engineer", you sternly said as he looked the most surprised you'd ever seen him, "I'm joking - not all of us move to Monaco so our million euro salaries have better taxes", you teased.
"Why did you do it, then?", he asked, smiling at how familiar it all seemed. Just like old times, he thought.
"The company I work for was the one that needed the tax benefits", you clicked your tongue, "and they wanted people to move here. Only one of my colleagues moved here with her whole family, as they expected, so they ended up calling the ones that weren't attached to anything or anyone in particular, and I was one of them", you shrugged your shoulders, "I moved to a new country with a different language, the only people I knew were my work colleagues, so I had no one to complain about them to, but I make it work - at least I like to think I do", you smiled.
Not attached to anyone, he recalled, humming at your response, "it's not such a bad place to live, right? Granted I don't spend much time year, but still enough to appreciate it", Max spoke.
"How about you, Mr World Champion", you nudged, "how does it feel?".
"Obviously it's great, and everything that I worked for", he added, knowing the underlying topic in the conversation, "I get to drive fast cars and I travel the world, there's not much left for it to be the complete dream", he said, gingerly touching your fingers over the table and accepting your hold when you laced them together.
Conversation was flowing easily until one of the employees told Max that he would have to go and get ready for the dinner, meaning you would have to part ways.
"Does Tuesday work for you? I'm not sure how well I'll be tomorrow", he chuckled, "yes, that's fine by me, just text me the address and the time", you smiled, getting up and kissing his cheek, "have a good time, Max, but be careful with the alcohol, I'd hate to have to pick you up again", you reminded him of the time he got way too drunk and he insisted he would only go home if you came to pick him up.
.
Dinner was great and Max invited you back to his place, hoping you'd be able to talk properly about the elephant in the room in a more private and comfortable place.
"You're struggling there, aren't you? Even with your itty bitty small hands?", Max teased as your pinky just about stretched enough for you to not lose everything by dumping the contents of your bag on the sidewalk.
As you and Max left the restaurant, you fiddled with your wallet in your bag, hoping to keep the card the waiter gave you safe for the next time you wanted to visit the place.
"I do not have itty bitty small hands!", you argued, shaking your bag a little to make sure everything was safely in place.
"We need to have the same starting line - like", you rearranged them so your wrists would be touching. Still, it didn't make much of a difference on your end. It looked like it even highlighted a few more differences, "yours is much bigger, I give up", you giggled.
"See?", Max said as he held your hand out against his, "these are the size of fairy hands! Tinkerbell probably has bigger hands than yours!", he exclaimed as you noticed how much bigger his hand was compared to yours. His fingers were a little bit thicker than yours and his palm covered all of your hand almost completely.
Now or never, Max thought as he laced your fingers in his once you let your arms drop and rest by your side. His thumb rubbed your skin and warmed you up, "was this your plan all along?", you wondered, feeling the bravery around you two and choosing to act on it.
"Lacing my hand in yours or proving to you that my biggest mistake was letting you go all of those years ago?", Max stated as he looked deeply into your eyes.
"We should talk about this inside", you bit your lip, allowing him to guide you through the apartment complex he lived in.
His living room was decorated in classy tones, probably with the help of him mother and sister, as you sat down on the sofa and face eachother.
"I know I apologised at the time, but I'm still sorry, Y/N", Max said, "at the time it was the dream and I didn't have much room for my own decisions. Still, I should've fought", he concluded.
"You didn't blatantly acknowledge it and decided we couldn't be together, Max", you conforted despite the hurt you felt at the time, "it hurt, - like a bitch actually -, but not because you were following your dream. I never wanted to pull you back and get in the way of your achievements", you gulped, "but I would be lying if I said I wouldn't like to give this a go, to give us a chance", you smiled.
"I know I have crazy schedules - I am barely here during the season -, but you were always the one I thought about. When I first raced in F1, when I got my first podium, my first win, my bad races - I wanted you there", he admitted, blue eyes looking into yours, "I can't promise that it will be easy, but I'll never risk you or our relationship, that's non negotiable", he stated.
Moving closer to him, you cupped his cheek with your palm, the slight stubble tickling your skin, "I'm in, Max", you smiled, taking the plunge and kissing his mouth, lips moving in sync as his hands pulled you into his lap.
The blissful moment was interrupted by a meow, Jimmy and Sassy walking into the living room, "Oh, guys", Max held you close to him as the cats sniffled you, "this is Jimmy and Sassy, my cats, took then long enough to leave the guest bedroom", he smiled as you tried to pet them, "cute, they seem nice enough - for cats anyway".
#max verstappen imagine#max verstappen x reader#max verstappen fanfic#max verstappen fluff#f1 x reader#f1 imagine#f1 fanfic#f1 fluff
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PAC/ Your destined person 💘
Hi loves and welcome to this new PAC! I'll be taking a time from this blog to focus on another projects, it doesn't mean that this blog will be unactive, it is just that I won't post that much pacs or astrology, I'll be more focused in my Spanish blog for a while. Anyway, private readings will still be open and from time to time I'll post something over here because Tumblr is and always will be my safe place.
Take a deep breath before choosig your pile and pick the picture you feel called the most, because this is a general reading it doesn't have to fully resonate, keep what does and leave what doesn't for somebody else, you can always choose another pile :)
For private readings click here
My blog in Spanish here
Decks: Romantic tarot, dark wood tarot, tea leafs oracle, romance angels oracle, love oracle cards
All pics are from pinterest, credits to their owners
Pile 1/ Pile 2
Pile 3/ Pile 4
Pile 1:
Who is your destined person?:
(Cards: 6 of swords, 3 of pentacles, 6 of pentacles, moon, hermit, queen of wands, king of swords/ hermit rev, death, wheel of fortune, 5 of pentacles, sun)
This person probably comes from a very different backgroud than you, it will seem like you don't have much in common at first, they have probably moved from the place they were born and are getting used to the new place. They are a hard worker, right now they are putting a lot of effort in this area of their life, probably to help financially their beloved ones, I'm hearing to help their parents, they are so focused in making money that they are not nurturing other aspects of their life like socializing, the good thing is that they don't seem to care about it. They got the hermit with two different decks, once upright and another time on reversed, it gives me the feeling that they feel very comfortable in their solitude but at the same time they are craving significative connections and a reason to get out of their isolation, for some reason they feel very exhausted but they can't sleep at night, they are like an owl, by night they seem to be more active even though they should be super tired because their work is exhausting (I'm writting this at 13:31 on my clock, maybe it's a relevant number for you or this connection). This person has some emotional issues that keeps them up at night, it's like they need these few extra hours of the day that they are taking from their resting time to relax when the rest of the world is quiet, maybe it's because they are far from home or because they miss their family, because this is related to their emotional world but for what I see here they are thinking too much about others and not about themselves and their mental peace. Anyway, this person is really attractive, for what I see in the cards, they have some not-so-secret admirers that are chasing them or looking desperately for their attention, whatever they are trying is not working with your person, your person seems to be an introvert or at least, they need to feel emotionally connected to something or someone to invest their energy fully on it, I could even say that they are a little shy when it comes to interact with other people. this person has an strong masculine energy, also I keep hearing the word resilient so this may be the most noticable trait about them, the thing here with the admirers is that they are chasing your person, like taking the masculine role but only for their outside appearance, your person seems to need something more to connect with someone and they prefer to court that to be courted. Right now they are closing chapters, there's a massive divine intervention in their life even if they are not aware of this, this is happening for their highest good because they need to get out of this hermit mode and start experiencing good things. They seem to be a little apathic and their lack of rest could be affecting their health too, even if they want it or not, a change is coming to align them, there will be a shift in their luck very soon, especially to help them financially because they seem to be struggling in this aspect. your person is really calmed and peaceful, very goal oriented and commited to what's important to them, you'll love the kind of person they are and the peace they'll bring to your life.
Your connection:
(Cards: deception, new love, this could be the one, playfulness/ girl with a snake, heartbroken, the phoenix, heart with a key, wedding rings)
Okay, your person had a very tough relationship with a toxic person that played with their heart and left them in the dust, this might be one of the reasons why they are avoiding so much human contact, especially with romantic interests, their heart is still recovering from this heartbreak. When you appear in their life, everything will trasform, it will be so magical and unexpected that they won't know what to do, you'll catch them off guard, everything will feel different with you, it's like they've been in a grey and clouded place and you appear to make the sun shine again in their life. This past relationship marked them but knowing you will make them realize that not everyone is the same, you will make them gain hope in love again, it will happen naturally and your relationship will be blossoming peacefully but with certainty, from the first moments they'll know that you are meant for them and will work to make you know it. This is a soulmate connection so you'll feel very comfortable with eachother like you know the other from a very long time, I see a lot of funny dates together, like an exhibition of some kind (I'm translating directly from google but I mean those places wih a ferris wheel, bumper cars, cotton candy and those places where you get a teddy bear if you drop all the bottle from the shelf, something that sort, please comment me the correct name of this lol). An important thing I see here is that your person might be shy at first and will try to make things the right way, not forcing anything, but what I like the most is that even though they have their heart wounded, they won't pay this pain with you, in fact, you'll be a reason to stop thinking about the past pain and focusing on the precious future you could share together, you'll ignite them faith in life, they'll find motivation again, they might even realize that they weren't as comfortable in their solitude as they wanted to project. I see a fast commitment, I also see that they will leave you the key of their home so you can stay there even when they are working, they'll try to make you part of their day to day life and will be very honest with your from the start, you can ask them anything and they will respond with all the truth, even if the truth doesn't leave them in good place, they want you to know every detail about them, you can also trust in them to share whatever you want, they will be super understanding and compassionate.
Signals:
(Tea leafs: sunrise, woman, feather, bull, desk, scissors, caterpillar)
By the moment you are about to meet your person, you'll be finding out the true intentions of a woman in your life, I don't know why but the energy of this woman gives me really bad vibe, like a two faced person, is someone that you should put distance with in order to protect your energy because in terms of love she could often have bad experiences and she will not be happy for you when you find your soulmate. There also this message of not sharing your ideas about the future, not just in love but about your goals or plans in work too, if you are thinking about initiate something by your own just keep it private for a while, or at least just share it with your closest ones because this woman or femenine energy around you don't what you to thrive. The good thing is that you got the card of the sunrise, so you'll be having a lot of new ideas that will lead you to find success, I'd suggest you to write down those ideas,take time to organize them and start implementing them in aries season, at the beggining of the spring, energies will be at your favor. For your person they'll be working really hard, there might be a chance for a rise or getting a higher position in their work field and they'll be focused into that, for others of you there might also be the chance that your person will be getting another job with a better salary, I'm getting especially this second option because your person seems to be very unhappy in their current job and they need better conditions, it also seems like there is some opposition from someone in their work and your person has to keep themselves in a defensive position to deal with it and they don't want this no more, they know they deserve a healthier work enviroment, maybe there's an abusive boss here. There's the possibility that you are really close to meet eachother because of the cards on tarot and this message so be aware of your surroundings because your person is closer than you imagine :)
Channeled messages: a puppy, sexy but don't know it, romantic dates, strong arms, meet them in a public place like a park, a market or a place with art or literature involved like museums or book stores, gift giving, a soft pink or white dress, night dates, overthinking, financial struggle, 999, 1333, virgo, scorpio, cancer and leo, might be seasons for you two meet or your person's sign.
Pile 2:
Who is your destined person?
(Cards: 9 of wands, 4 of swords, 7 of pentacles, 10 of pentacles, justice, death, world/ devil, justice, queen of pentacles, judgement, king of wands)
Okay, lets start saying that you know this person but never had anything romantic with them besides a crush for some of you, they are someone that is familiar to you, maybe you have talked at some point or is simplier than that and you follow them on social media or something that sort, you know eachother but there's almost any interaction between you two. I usually say on private readings when I see that the consultant know their person that Universe has a wicked sense of humor and sometimes, this person can be so random as your crush on primary school, someone you talked once in a party, a friend of a friend and those kind of things, so don't be dissapointed when you see that you know your person because many times, even though you know them, they can be the most random person you could ever imagine. Right now your person is going through some legal issues, it can be a divorce for some of you but for others it might be more related to an spiritual awakening where they are taking resposibility over things they have done in the past, like paying some karma and realizing why they are paying it. The good thing is that your person is closing a chapter, this awakening can be hard, because of the devil card, but it also will bring them a big relief and a change in their reality for the best, there's also a change in their way to face life. For what I see in the cards, your person is wealthy or well positioned in life, probably has a high position in their work field, for some they can work in something related to laws but is an enviroment with a lot of competition and stabs in the back, you have to be a little ruthless to thrive in that area, there's also a chance that they already have a child or kids near them, if you have children, your person will get along very well with your kid too. Your person has an strong temper, the good part of it is that they are very protective of what they love and don't mind getting into trouble if that means keeping their beloved ones safe. The not so good part is that they can be too impulsive and irrational when angry, their passionate spirit can take the best from them sometimes, they will be your total opposite so if you have a natural calmed and peaceful temper this pile is for you. Your person is someone brave, a natural extrovert with a lot of charisma, they can draw all the attention of a room to them just with an smile, they are also very sexy, physically they are extremely attractive, they could also be a Libra or Sagittarius sun sign. Your person hasn't been an angel in their past, even though they are a nice person with a good heart, it seems like they did ot take the best decitions in their past and now they are regreting some mistakes. They are really handsome and charming, I see they haven't faced rejection in their past and that has led them to be too confident, they are the kind of person who always gets what they want, do you know Dexter from the show One Day? your person reminds me of him in the good and the bad traits. Anyway, they recently had an experience that made them realize the path they were taking and they want a diferent direction, they don't feel fulfilled and knows that can get something better for themselves, they are also facing the consequences of their actions si they might need some extra time to get into your life.
Your connection:
(Cards: this could be the one, trust, children, worth waiting for/ talking, golden mirror, sword and rose, self indulgence, love call)
You'll share a very special bond, I see trust issues from both of you but at the moment you start something together those issues will fade, it's like your souls will recognize that you both are meant for eachother, feelings will bloom naturally. I see different scenarios for your pile so take what resonates with you, for the people who already know who this person is, the cards invite you to keep hopeful but patient, just trust the Universe and focus on your bussiness meanwhile your person puts their life in order and solve the issues they are currently dealing with, you deserve to enjoy their best version. For others of you who can't figure out yet who your person is, the cards have a similar meaning, to stay optimistic visualizing your ideal relationship, you'll have to wait a little more than the other piles because your person is dealing with issues they need to resolve before meeting you, again, you deserve to enjoy their best version, your vibration is very high so having your person right now in your life with their current circumstances could affect negatively your energy, so this wait is a divine protection for you. Things will start by flirting between both of you, maybe some casual dates at first but for what see in the cards, there's a lot of communication here and it makes sense because through communication trust gets reinforced and that's what you both need. You both will be very different but will have so much in common, your experiences in life or even your tastes or hobbies, your favorite artist or the kind of music you like, it will start by something simple but then you'll realize how similar you truly are, you will mirror eachother in every aspect, for some with an spiritual development I see this person is your twin flame. A nice thing a like about your person is that they will allow you to stay in your femenine energy, the card of self indulgence gives me the feeling that they'll provide for the things you like, just as an example, if you are into a saga of books but you don't have enough money to afford everyone of them so you go buy it one by one, your person will buy you all the saga so you can enjoy your hobbies. For some of you I even see that your person pays for your beauty treatments like getting your lashes or nails done. I see that they'll like to take a protective role with you, if you are easilly stressed, especially in regards of legal matters or burocracy, your person will take care of it so you don't have to worry, if you have any dream or goal you want to achieve your person will also provide you a safe space so you can develop it, especially for those of you who are into arts or something that involves creativity
Signals:
(Tea leafs: teapot, mule, wreath, shield, stork, wedge, heart)
Your signs to know when your person is about to enter your life will be a dissapointment with a friendship of your same sex, you might have an idea of who this person is because you have been seeing red flags from them in the past but you have turned a blind eye with them, especially in terms of stubborness and not wanting to change their habits. I'm getting that they are the kind to mourn and complain over things that they could easilly change, even you could have given them advices in the past but this person is unwilling to change for the better so you'll have to take them out of your life before your person comes. The tea leafs say that this won't be easy for you because you love and appreciate this person but by having them in your life you have to stay in a protective state, the shield warns you that you need to protect yourself from this person because they are consuming your energies. For your person, they'll be in a process of creating something new, I'm getting that it will be related to work, they'll be moving in silence because there's someone near them that don't want your person to be successful in this new project, anyway the project will thrive regardless of what other people try to mess with it. Your person will be just about to get their victory when they get in a deeper contact with you, they'll feel like things are getting better for them after everything they had to go through, you'll be like their ultimate victory. They'll know it's you because they'll feel safe by your side, having in mind that they are surrounded by snakes, getting in contact with you will feel for them like being in precence of angels.
Channeled messages: protect yourself from evil eye, black turmaline, long term relationship, karmic debts, late night conversations, a lot of sexual energy, love letters, release the old so the new can enter, the goddess Kali, law of attraction, subliminal audios, stay in your femenine energy, the bee and the flower, trust the process, 1111, 222, sagittarius, libra, scorpio
Pile 3:
Who is your destined person?
(Cards: queen of cups, king of pentacles, queen of pentacles, 3 of wands, fool, king of cups, 10 of pentacles/ ace of wands, 8 of pentacles rev, 5 of swords rev, judgement, emperor)
This person is your soulmate/twin flame, they are your divine counterpart so you will notice it from the very first moment you meet them. Getting into who your person is, they come from a wealthy background, their family seem to be very rich to say the least, they have been a pampered child all their life, in fact, if they work is because they want to not because they need to. Your person has been raised by parents that are soulmates so they know what true love is and knows that they want that type of connection for them too, they are a romantic and are not afraid to express it, they are also very well mannered so expect them to be chilvalrous with you, they are a true gentleman. They are so open to love that is overwhelming, they fantazise an daydream a lot about you, how you look, your way to walk and your smell, they have you so much in their head but they feel frustration not knowing who you are and when you will appear, they look for you everywhere they go and in every person they meet, yu cold even feel their energy calling you, if you have romantic dreams with someone but you can see their face clearly it is your person calling you in, you can intuitively feel them, I'm also getting that if you are able to see the face of someone familiar to you in dreams like a famous person just check that person you dream about because they might reselble the characteristics of your person. They have a melancholic soul, like a poet from another century, they are very deep and emotional, they have so much love inside they want to offer but they feel frustrated because they don't find the right person to share it with, they don't want only to share love they want someone to share all their life with, they feel like they already have it all to live a happy life but there's this missing peace of wanting to share all their abundance with someone else. There's this phrase of the movie 'into the wild' (my favourite movie ever <3) that says 'happiness is only real when it's shared', I feel that your person resonates a lot with this phrase, they have people they love around but they crave a romantic connection to create a family with, btw, they are really into marriage and family, they also like children and animals and they love your person too. Your person has a sensitive heart and the pain of their solitude has led them to get involved with people with superficial intentions or toxic behaviors, mostly because of your person's money, they had a relationship in the past that left them feeling empty and that's why now they are giving themselves time to be alone and with their family, I see they have siblings that are playing a major role into your person's emotional healing. Idk if you'll know about this book, it's called fallen hearts by V.C Andrews, it is part of the Casteel saga but the character that reminds me of your person appears on the second book, his name is Troy Tatterton, I suggest you to read it or let me know if you already know them :). I also see that your person has traveled a lot, for some of you, you could even live at distanced places where you'd had to travel to see eachother, it may be in one of your person's journeys where they finally meet you.
The connection:
(Cards: true love, getting to know eachother, playfulness, wedding/ casette, hammer, camera, separation, twin flames)
Oh goddess, this is so beautiful it makes me want to cry! If it was up to your person they would marry you as soon as they meet you, after all their painful journey, when you appear in their life they'll feel like the skies will open up only for them, they'll know it's you and will court you from the very first moment, they will be flirty but charming at the same time, I see you'll feel the same too. Even though that feelings will be intense at first, you both will make the effort to get to know eachother on deeper levels to check your chemistry and compatibility, everything will feel light and easy, you'll get along super well, they'll make you feel like you are in a safe place, if you are naturally introverted they'll make you feel protected and, in case you are an hyper independent person, you'll feel like you can finally relax and release some of the weight over your shoulders. At some point you'll have distance between you two but it won't separate you, I see you will make the best of every moment you spend together and, after a little time your person will offer you a seious commitment so you can start your life together as a couple, it might also be a soon engagement. I see that you'll be watching the pictures and videos you make together, especially if decide to travel, I see a fancy cabin near a forest where you are staying together to spend some alone time with nobody else there to bother you. The time you spend separated will play a major role for you two to decide that you want to be together forever, I see that your person will have a harder time being away from you, that's why they won't hesitate at the moment of offering you commitment, probably they give you a promise ring or tell you to get married, it will happen sooner than usual but both of you will feel certain about this relationship and what you want from it, you'll fit like puzle pieces and you'll both will understand why things didn't work with anybody else in the past.
Signals:
(Tea leafs: gong, key, shark, caterpillar, dagger, camel, unicorn, carriage)
For you, you'll be receiving good news about something you have done, it will be something exciting for you, a successful outcome for something you put a lot of effort in, you could even celebrate it with your close ones because this will make you very happy. There's a little warning for you about being responsible with your money but also I see you could loose something important like a jewel or something with big material value like a phone or something that sort, so if you suddently loose soemthing important take it as a sign that your person is about to enter your life. For your person I'd confirm what I said before about the trip, the carriage means a journey either be a mental or physical but I feel that it's a trip for vacation. This journey is because they have been through a period of worries and stress, they just have solved a problem before making this trip, this solution will involve some changes in their life that will align them with their highest good so, overcoming this obstacle will finally lead them to you, their most desired wish. They'll be taking a time to release all the tension they've been holding, it is surely oon holidays so check the calendar just in case, they'll be with more people in this journey, probably their siblings, your meeting will be something spontaneous, neither of you will be expetiing it
Channeled messages: Water sign, earth moon sign, family money, colors red and green, divine counterparts, white doves and sunflowers, many options in love, send you romantic phrases or pictures that reminds them of you, settle down, a midset change, aries season, 777, 1818
Pile 4:
Who is your destined person?:
(Cards: knight of wands, 10 of cups, moon, queen of pentacles, 8 of pentacles, knight of swords/ 7 of cups rev, 9 of swords, queen of pentacles, fool, empress)
Your person got the queen of pentacles repeated with two different tarot decks, this gives me the feeling that they feel plenty with the current direction of their life, with the 10 of cups I'd confirm that they feel happy and fulfilled and everything is working out for your person. Besides that luck is on their side naturally, your person has fought to be in the place they are right now, they are following their passion and vocation and being loyal to their heart has lead them to success and recognition, they are also very optimistic and knows how to see the good side of things at every situation. Your person reminds me of Eli from Boy swallows universe (please watch the show, it's awesome and you'll love Eli), your person is brave, independent and resourceful, even daring sometimes, they are loyal to their truth and their heart, in fact I see they can be a little obsessed with finding out the truth of things so they could even be into conspiracy theories or things that sort. Your person is a wanderer, a curious soul but with a grounded spirit, they can be wild sometimes but they know their own limits and knows when to stop, they are really down to earth and mature on the important matters but very lighthearted and spontaneus when the ocassion requires it. They have been through seriouus things in the past, they may have some unresolved heavy trauma they didn't gave themselves the chance to solve it so they might act reckless sometimes, but the good thing is that they have an strong moral compass and value system they keep loyal at every moment, betray their values would feel like betraying themselves and that's something they don't want to go through. Your person can be an unintentional heartbreaker, they don't want to hurt anybody's feelings but it's easy for people to catch feelings for your person, is something about their aura or their energy, they are so warm and gentle that everybody feels drawn to them and can't help but develop feelings for them, they are easy to be loved. Your person is really smart, they could be air dominant in their chart because they also seem like having a talent with words or being a great communicator, they are also very funny so expect to laugh a lot with them, they might be younger than you or it's simply that they have a youthful energy, whatever it is they have this childlike energy that makes them lovely. Your person has this golden retirever energy that everyone likes, they are also very friendly and seems to have it easy to create friendships with other people, their sense of humor is a plus on this aspect too, they are a sweetheart with a loving heart but they are also very hard working and commited to what they think is right, you'll feel super comfortable by their side, even though they could be younger they will give off very mature and reliable energy.
The connection:
(Cards: Keep an open mind, retreat, flirt, love yourself first, chemistry/ the sword and rose, girl talk, cupid's arrow, sunglasses, engagement ring)
Okay, at first they might not be your usual type or the kind of person you would be interested in, for some, your person could be younger than you and that could be a turn off for you. Your connection will bloom progressively by creating a friendship first, besides the fact that your person will be very into you from the very first moment, they'll prefer to respect your times and show you they are worthy of your love, they will feel like they are out of your league for some reason. You might run from them at a certain moment because you get confused with your emotions, especially for those of you reading this that are a water moon, you'll need some time to reflect on your emotions and realize that there's an inmense chemistry between you two, maybe this distance you take serves you as a reassurance of how drawn you feel to this person, they'll have a bad time with this retreat but for you will be very healing and enlightning. I see that there's a female or dominant femenine energy in your life you trust so much, that person is very reliable and wise, don't doubt to ask them for advice because she will bring you clarity about the situation, I'm glad to say that you have an amazing support system, count on that female friend when you need mental clarity because she will be very honest, for some of you this person could be a sister. During this separation you might think that your person is focused into their bussiness but they'll be into stalker mode (positively, of course), checking up on you, they might even ask someone close to you how you are doing just to know about you, they'll also be checking your social media to know about you, they won't do it in a creepy way, they'll feel the same pull to you but they have a harder time trying to contain their emotions, the good thing is that you seem to be very intuitive so you'll know when their energy is trying to approach you. They'll be so in love with you, it feels like they fell first but you'll fall harder after a while, you both are soulmates so, even though you'll try to fight your feelings, you can't help but fall for this person, and after you see how much they are willing to offer and their true esence you'll fall for them (I'm writting this at 15:15 on my clock in case it's a relevant number for you). They'll wear their heart on their sleeve, they'll be very protective of you and won't allow any disrispect to you, they can be cutthroating if anybody tries to mess with you, tey'll feel so honnoured by you focusing on them that they will try to make you the happiest person ever everyday of your life, they can't believe their luck by finding a person like you and receiving love from you, this connection will be an equal give and take, you both will do everything for the other to make them happy.
Signals:
(Tea leafs: dolphin, windchimes, fox, broken ring, bull, needle and thread, ant, table)
For you, you'll be in a very nice moment of your life when you are about to meet your person, you'll be receiving a big amount of money because of something you did in the past, like a material reward. This material abundance will give you a feeling of peace and relief, you have the chance to have some vacations or free time by yourself, I see you a little secretive about this, like you don't want anybody to ruin this good time, you may also be silent about the amount of money you receive. For your person, they'll be dettaching from someone or something, the broken ring is usually associated with romance but I feel it more related to bussiness so they might be changing their job for a healthiest enviroment (if you felt called to pile 1 I suggest you to check it), it seems like their current work field is forcing your person to sacrifice themselves and keeps them in a defensive position. They'll have to work hard but it will bring them stability and security.
Channeled messages: Acts of service, getting a pet together, a cat person, sleep problems, full moons affect their mood, white horses and moths, vivid dreams, sitcoms, a lot of laugh, mental fog, meditation, 1212, 444, taurus, gemini, aquarius
#Spotify#witchblr#leoascendente#tarot#tarotblr#divination witch#pac reading#pick a pile#tarot reading#pick a card reading#tarot spread#love tarot spread#love tarot reading#future spouse tarot
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I love how even silly short missions manage to have their share of wholesomeness and family connection. It's like family is important in a series called Spy x Family or something.
Anyway, Anya is a kid that gets very attached to certain things - and despite being bold enough to use the knowledge she has due to her telepathy in order to make Loid do what she wants, she's not exactly a spoiled kid. She still sticks to Mr. Chimera, the only toy she had while she was in the orphanage. She doesn't ask for new clothes, or toys, or gadgets, what she asks for is experiences (the castle rescue, adopting Bond in specific after she was emotionally invested in him)... and peanuts, too.
So to her, the penguin plush is not just one toy from her plethora of toys that got ruined. It's a toy that her dad got for her. It's a souvenir of their aquarium adventure, where she helped him locate the penguin he needed to find and even arrest the criminal who wanted to get the secret information about the weapon. It's a reminder of how she took part and helped him in his mission. Just a replacement stuffed penguin won't do. It's not the toy itself, it's the memories connected to it. I mean, of course she's sad a toy of her got destroyed - by the dog she asked to have, no less - but it hurts even more knowing what this toy means to her.
And the show takes Anya's feelings seriously with that. The soft "Little by Little" score plays while Loid fixes the penguin, with Yor looking with anticipation. Bond feels sad and regretful, understanding the consequences of his actions and wanting to make it up to Anya. They're all invested in things getting better.
And once the penguin is ready, though with visible "scars" now, Loid reassures Anya that his new appearance is nothing to be ashamed of.
And the interesting thing? Twilight, Best Spy of Westalis, Master of DisguiseTM... stutters. He does so in Japanese both in the manga and the anime.
Which makes me wonder, considering his background and profession, how big his experience with scars is (and if we're gonna learn more about that, come on give the whump fan some scraps here 👀👀) (pls don't spoil me about the manga if we do, I want the whump but on its own time!) and if reaching into his own personal feelings about scars in order to resonate with Anya hit him just a little more than he expected. Or if he was so serious about it that he didn't know whether he should tell her something so grim. He's here dedicating himself into a deadly dangerous job so that kids like Anya won't have to suffer like he did as a kid, and yet he has to pass on to her something he learned the hard way.
Yeah yeah I'm here putting too much thought and grimness into what was supposed to be a wholesome moment. Hi I'm Nette and you'll be getting a lot of those in the future :)
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Love Reading - Pick-a-Picture Edition ❣️💌✨
1. 📷
You may see this person as someone who you could have something very passionate with. You find this person extremely attractive and mature but you may feel like they have player or flirt energy and don’t know if they are taking you seriously. They may come off as very confident and self centered or selfish. You could simply be very confident in this relationship or it may feel one sided at times as you too may be very selfish.You at times may feel detached and overwhelmed with this connection and may feel like running away because it gets too deep or it triggers unhealed traumas you may have not been aware of. You may at times feel like moving on from this person or giving each other some time apart. You ultimately see this person as a long term partner and someone you could build a happy home with. Probable marriage material, filled with happiness, love, celebration and abundance. You feel like this person fits right in with your family and will give them the chance to continue growing your connection. Now the other person sees you or the relationship as emotionally fulfilling, they are ready to invest their time and energy on this connection. They feel like they could be vulnerable and emotionally open with you. You may bring out a certain side of them emotionally. They may also be scared to open up to you due to past relationships or heartbreak so they could be breadcrumbing you because they don’t want to show you how deeply they feel for you yet. For some this person feels like you are helping them heal wounds from the past.They plan on making you happy because you make them happy. For a few I'm getting that this may be someone from your past coming back after they ghosted you and are ready to offer you a real commitment. They realize how much you mean to them and regret treating you a certain way which hurts your feelings. I see that this relationship or connection will need teamwork if you two want to make it work. You must work individually and as a team in order to see positive movement, even when roadblocks appear you will need to learn and communicate to solve problems together. The advice is for both of you to keep grounded and take things slow and steady instead of rushing into something. Overall the energy seems happy, emotional and full of celebration.
💌“ I want to be more than friends”
💌“ I wish i had treated you better”
💌“I left you before you could leave me”
💌“Past is in the past don’t look back”
💌“Planning for the future”
💌“Travel is good for the soul”
💌Past is in the past don’t look back
💌Planning for the future -travel
💌I want to be more than friends
💌I left you before you could leave me
💌I wish i had treated you better
2.📷
Someone has recently had a dream, vision or breakthrough about how they feel for you.They are falling hard for you, but they also feel deceptive or may be hiding something from you or from themselves. They aren’t acknowledging something. This person could visualize you two being together and what life could be with you. This person could be very artistic or imaginative. This person sees you as the ideal person who they will be happy with. They see you as an opportunity for wish fulfillment. You are their wish to come true. This looks like a new opportunity at love, you or the person could feel trapped or lost. This person could be a friend or in your group of friends and you may not be aware of their feelings for you but it is worth giving them the chance if they confess to you their feelings. Another thing I'm picking up on is that this person friendzoned you in the past but now is realizing they have actual feelings for you. This person could be sending you messages through music, or they think of you when they listen to music.
💌“ I want to be more than friends.”
💌“You don’t know how hard it was to let you go”
💌“I lost myself for a little while”
💌“Finding the truth crushed me”
💌Hidden desires/ hidden intentions
💌“Social media got me in trouble”
💌“You speak to me through music”
3.📷
You may feel like this connection or relationship is breaking or not stable so you feel defensive and feel like you need to guard yourself. You may be scared of heartbreak, you feel like the other person is hiding stuff from you and you just want them to be honest with you. You want balance to be restored in this relationship, feeling like something is unfair or unjust. You may be overthinking multiple scenarios or expecting many possibilities of what could go wrong or right with this person. Your emotions may be all over the place. Your person sees you as a potential partner and they have some feelings for you but they are currently going through some mental conflict and can’t decide what they want with you. You or them or both could be going through a transformation or about to go through a transformation. In general I see the connection going through a transformation, whatever has caused a block or conflict in this relationship has caused both of you to go through a transformation. The structure or foundation of this relationship is being transformed, it’s like you guys are starting new or having a different approach to how you go into the relationship. I see the other person is having mental conflict or blockages because they don’t know if they are ready for a relationship or may be indecisive as to follow the logic or their emotions. They want to make the right decision for themselves, I kind of feel like they are being selfish and only thinking about what will benefit them most. They want to be successful and may be too focused on their career and finances. Some of them are deciding between money, material things or love. I see them going with the flow and just letting time give them an answer, they want to break certain cycles they have continued in the past. I feel like they are defensive or trying to hold on to something or a certain cycle. They may be someone who would always block or remove themselves from others when things got hard or they became overwhelmed. This time around I feel like they actually found something real with you, so that is why it’s not so easy to run away. If there is a breakup or separation some of you could rekindle the relationship with them, but you are being asked to take things slow. A need to nurture yourself or spend some time in nature. Going through an awakening or healing moment. You both have triggered certain traumas that need shadow work & healing. Balance will be restored whether you work things out or not, you will find healing and balance.
💌“I want you”
💌“I wish things could be different”
💌“I remember every detail of that day”
💌“I lost myself for a while”
💌Devotion , hopelessly devoted to you
💌Stuck at a crossroad- major intersection
💌Reciprocity - adjustments are being made
💌Reminiscing on past precious moments
💌Guilt for past actions & behaviors
4.📷
You feel that you have done inner healing and this person is here because you did the work. You see this person as strong and nurturing, they protect and make you feel safe. They are a safe space for you. You can show them the best and worst parts of you and they still embrace you and make you feel loveable. You are willing to open up more to this person, and you may also want this person to open up more. You have strong passionate feelings for them and want them to express their passion for you, but they may be holding back their true feelings. They feel like they need to guard their true feelings for you because they are scared of being vulnerable. They may also feel like they can’t put all their focus and attention on you just yet because they are fighting inner battles or trying to get other things in order before they can commit fully to you. They want a reconciliation with you after having an awakening or becoming aware of what they feel for you. They want to rekindle the connection because they feel like they haven’t been true to themselves or to you. They might have been standoffish towards you because they have other issues or conflict going on. They feel like you are their wish fulfillment and want something long lasting with you because you make them feel like no other has before. There seems to be a completion of a cycle but also a new beginning or opportunity at love for this pile. Maybe this person and you took a break or stopped communicating but things will pick back up. You may be receiving a message from them soon or communication will improve. For a few I'm picking up that you are in their mind a lot but they try to ignore you. They are fighting themselves or are hiding from their true feelings because they feel they are not ready to express them towards you.
💌“ I am becoming a better person”
💌“ I wish things could be different”
💌“ You and I were too young”
💌“ You were the best thing in my life”
💌“My life is not as together as it seems”
💌Lurking in the shadows
💌Reconciliation is coming
💌Still working on it
💌Fairy tales fo exists
Take what resonates and leave what doesn't!!
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𝚈𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝙽𝚎𝚡𝚝 𝚁𝚎𝚕𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜𝚑𝚒𝚙:
(What it’ll be like, the energy they’ll give off, how they’ll feel about you, the purpose of this relationship, their next actions, & advice.) (For some of you this is a current relationship.)
𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘗𝘪𝘭𝘦𝘴: (left to right)
♡book a reading here♡
Pile One:
Hey, pile one. It's clear to see your next partner will feel like they feel true love with you. You will be teaching them important life lessons, and because of the way you love them, it's going to help them see their worth. They may have been in unhealthy relationships in the past and I feel like with you they're able to let their guard down and be open. I feel like they had trust issues and settled for less than they deserved in their past relationships and in general, but with you they finally see what love should be like.
The connection between you and this person is definitely not new. This is someone you have history with. If you don't resonate you may want to choose a different pile. So, what I'm getting is that this person has been carrying a lot when it comes to how they feel. They haven't been letting you see how they feel, talking about it, or asking for help even though they feel like they need it. They're going to be feeling indecisive, confused, and second guessing themselves because they're scared of making a choice to commit or not to commit. They know they'll lose out on a good person, and I feel like for some of you, they're having a hard time choosing between you and another person, or whether they want to commit or not. It's like they have this one foot in one foot out energy. Whatever the case may be, I see this person trying to balance out their life. Financially, romantically, spiritually, and emotionally. Maybe even their family life as well. They're definitely going to be juggling a lot all at once and trying to keep everything under control. I feel like they haven't been taking any action or putting in effort into the relationship with you and it feels like they're a bit closed off and hesitant to open up to you because of their fear and insecurities. They could've been a player or was stuck in their ways and with you I feel like you made them feel something they've never felt and even if they hide it well from you, they feel deeply for you. For some of you this person will confess how they feel unexpectedly, and it won't happen right away. You may already or will be going through a period of hot and cold energy, ups and downs, talking then not talking until you guys finally come together. If you even want to be with them. I am seeing that you will feel tied to them still. For some of you, this person may be someone you have history with like I said, and you separated, and during that time they got with someone else but didn't fully commit to that person because they still felt for you, and you felt for them as well, but this wasn't ever said by them. Maybe by you though.
The energy of your person when you guys are going to be getting in a relationship will come off as them being very patient, career oriented, and ambitious. I feel like they're learning to think long term and more practical about the connection with you. In the past they may have not been someone who normally committed or really invested their time and energy into the right things. I feel like they used to think in a more temporary way and let their immaturities and bad habits get in the way. They're going to be the one to initiate having a committed relationship with you because I feel like it aligns with their goals and plans that they have for their future. They see you being a part of it, and I feel like they weren't an honest person in the past. They used to be very sneaky and maybe even deceptive. They also never expressed how they truly felt to anyone because of their own fears. I feel like they'll be wanting to heal with you and spend time alone away from others, meaning blocking the outside noise and interferences out so they could focus more on the relationship with you and bettering themselves. I feel like they will feel very frustrated with themselves because they allowed disruptions and third-party situations to get in the way of them showing up and being there for you. They will be strengthening their faith and cleansing themselves of all the things that got in the way of the relationship and their growth. They will have faith that things are going to get better, and I see them being confident in their approach and wanting to build a home and the create the feeling of success with you. I feel like when they think of their best self they think of you. They only feel like their best when they're around you and you remind them of love. (I literally cried on this part). I feel like you are what they need in a healthy way. You encourage them and inspire them to be better. I see them definitely surprising you and unexpectedly coming clean about how they feel about you.
I feel like this person was very superficial and let materialistic things including their ego control them. This affected the relationship between you guys because they weren't being as genuine as they should have been. I see them feeling bad and really guilty because they know you're the victim in a sense. They know they messed up and they can't run from it anymore. You could have left them because you were fed up with how they acted and treated you. I feel like this triggered them and they realized like "damn they really leaving me." When you guys are getting into this commitment with each other all of this will be on their mind. The history, how they made you feel, how they want to change, and how they want to treat and love you the way you deserved to be loved. They ignored the love and passion they felt for you because it was too intense. Not in a bad way either, they just couldn't handle it. I feel like they don't want to let you go. They don't want to lose you and they will feel a bit powerless because I feel like they're insecure. They don't know if things will work between you guys, but they want them to. I feel like they lack the confidence because your answer or how you feel will determine whether or not you guys are really done. They will be a bit scared of coming towards you and expressing how they feel, but they will. They want to heal and let go of the past. They also want you to heal and they know how much they've disappointed you. I feel like they were feeling so ashamed because you were good to them, and they took you for granted. They trust you; they love you, and they feel like you are the one for them the timing just wasn't right in the past. They want to protect you and the relationship from anything that tries to destroy it again, even themselves. They don't want to hurt you anymore and I feel like they genuinely want to change their life for the better to be able to have you in it. I feel like they cry about you a lot as well.
The purpose of this relationship is to teach the both of you valuable lessons about your self worth, faith, and life in general. I feel like you both will learn forgiveness, honesty, and how to really be your genuine selves. You both argued a lot and I feel like there was so many harsh words said, and painful experiences learned throughout the connection itself and even not being involved with each other, but still being on and off, you both learned lessons with other people and situations too. I feel like for them the lesson was way bigger than it was for you just because they've genuinely never felt deep love and a real connection with someone. That's not to say you felt any different than they do, but it hit them really deep and took them a lot longer to catch on to the truth of their feelings, let alone the connection itself. You both will learn that good things take time and they're challenging. Sometimes you gotta go through hell and back just to find peace. This relationship will lead to commitment and marriage and give the both of you what you really need out of a connection. I also feel like the connection happened so suddenly for the both of you and it was a miracle. Like it was divine intervention when you guys met each other. Could've even been at a party or through a cousin and/or friend. It caught the both of you off guard and neither of you expected to fall in love with each other or to be where you are in the point of time when you're actually committing to each other for the long run. Some of you will even have kids together and things will feel so surreal, almost like a dream come true. I feel like things were going really good in the beginning and maybe even a little too fast and you both needed to learn big lessons so God took the connection and started created situations and experiences so that way you guys can both slow down and start paying attention to the things you needed to see. It may have felt like the worst things started happening and the relationship just started to fall apart out of nowhere, but really it was coming together, and your old lives were changing massively and the energies that kept you stuck were being purged and released. I feel like you both learned to have faith and to trust in divine timing and not your own. It's like God placed you two together and even when you tried to run from them, you couldn't. It's the same way for them. Neither of you can explain the connection or how you feel about each other, but it's deep and it's real.
Your person's next actions will be taking responsibility for their decisions. I feel like they know everything they did to hurt you and all that stuff. I see them wanting to make up for it and they will through their actions literally. There will be challenges of course and a lot of conflict surrounds your person in some way. I feel like there's just obstacles and difficulties they will be dealing with and trying to overcome within themselves and in their life. They are going to restore balance and harmony in the relationship, it's just going to take patience and perseverance and they want to know if you're on board or not, so I see them communicating to you what it is they want and waiting for your response. I also feel like they're going to be tapping into their intuition to try and feel your energy in some way. Like they're going to be trying to read you and look deeper into what you say and do because I feel like you are a bit mysterious and they want to know what's on your mind and what you're doing, feeling, who's around you, and everything. I feel like they're a bit nosey because they care whether or not you're entertaining someone else or if there's something bothering you, they just care about the small things, and they don't want to miss a detail or accidentally miss that you are upset or struggling in some way and just not showing or telling them. I also feel like if you were unfaithful to them in some way, they are going to be working on healing from this. If that doesn't resonate, they're releasing past trauma and fears due to deception that happened in their past. They're also scared of trusting you because of their own deception and how they mistreated you. They don't want you to take revenge or somehow get back at them for hurting you. I also feel like it's hard for them to get through to you. You can come off as very cold, detached, and not revealing too much when you're upset, and they don't want you to leave them so I see them doing all they can to mend things with you.
The advice for you is to learn from your past, use your wisdom and discernment moving forward. Know that endings bring new beginnings and it's time for change. This relationship will change and grow from where it is currently and so will you. Embracing change and learning to live life open mindedly will help you. Letting go of pessimistic feelings and feelings of resentment, apathy, and bitterness will benefit you and the relationship itself. Being happy on your own and learning to embrace your own company and feeling content within yourself no matter what. You will be successful and when you allow yourself to feel accomplished and happy you will start to manifest changes in all areas of your life. I see a wish fulfillment happening and Spirit is saying to allow the energy of expansion into your life. Do new things that bring you joy, connect with others, be open to change, and embrace the lessons you've learned. You gotta learn to open yourself up wholeheartedly. It's also important to embrace the present moment and allow yourself to feel joyful and abundant. Have more gratitude and compassion towards yourself and others.
Pile Two:
Hey pile two! I feel like your current or next partner will be someone who felt love at first sight with you. They could definitely love your smile and same for you about them. I feel like there is a very deep spiritual connection between you guys and none of the superficial things can get in the way of that. You both love each other deeply and you'll be very supportive of each other in every way. I also feel like this person will be someone you can always depend on to be there, and they'll always be your biggest fan, lifting you up when you're down, investing in you, and I feel like quality time will be a big thing between you.
The relationship between you guys will move very gradually. It'll take some time, effort, and patience to build up the momentum. However, I feel like the attraction and connection will happen very quickly. Things will be very passionate, and I feel like they'll be caring, charismatic, and show you exactly how they feel about you, boldly. I see both of you balancing and healing each other in the places needed. They will be someone who is very mature and they know exactly what they want and how to get it. Not in a bad way. I also feel like sexually there will be intense chemistry and it'll be very exciting. This could be a new person for a lot of you. I see them showering you with love, affection, and attention. They definitely want to provide for you, support you, and lead you in a good direction. I feel like things will be so peaceful and flow almost effortlessly, but of course you both have to put in effort. This relationship will be divinely guided, and I feel like there is this telepathic, magical, feeling you get with them. It's like you connect very deeply in every way and sometimes you know what they're going to say or do before they even do it. It's like you read each other's energy. I also feel like the third eye chakra is very significant. You may have had dreams about this person or intuitive nudges like yeah this is the one. I also feel like in the beginning, obviously commitment won't happen immediately. It's going to take time because you're both finishing certain cycles in your life and letting go of toxic behaviors and addictions. I feel like you may be frustrated in the beginning because you don't quite understand why things are happening the way they are and you may be facing obstacles that require you to have a great deal of patience and persistence. I feel like things won't be super emotional at first because you and this person are being pushed to focus on creating stability for yourselves and learning how to feel abundant without all the superficial things. Sometimes you both may wish you can just be together and forget all of the problems and responsibilities in the world. There is a lot you won't see in the beginning but give it time things will bloom when they're meant to.
So, the energy this person will give off is someone who is charming, exciting, idealistic, and very assertive and passionate. I feel like they will be experiencing a hard period of their life when you meet them. I feel like for some of you this is someone you already know who take it how it resonates, but there is distance and separation. I feel they may feel frustrated and moody because of it. Whatever they're going through, they're going to be quite overwhelmed and guarded over their feelings. I feel like they may be scared that you will leave them, and they've been in very toxic situations to where they're a bit co-dependent at times. There is an energy of co-dependency here. It could also be them fighting addictions and bad habits of co-dependency relating to a drug or specific thing that they indulge in. I see them being very loving, generous, and affectionate to you because they don't want to lose you. They're going to be open to receiving your love and anything you give them because they want a relationship with you. I do feel like you know things about this person that they're scared of, almost like they're assuming you may hold it against them. They may have been a player, a liar, a cheater, doesn't have the best reputation and they're aware of it. I also feel like for some of you if you already know this person, they may have ghosted you and entertained other people, and you feel for deeply them but you're not about to allow yourself to be played. It's like they wanted you to chase them at some point. I feel like if that's the case for you, you distanced yourself from this person and they're aware of it. They may even be avoiding you themselves. They will come in to ask for your forgiveness and hope to balance things out between you guys again. For others, I feel like this person did some dirt in the past either to you or in another situation, and it's catching up to them and their karma will be weighing on them and the connection they have with you. They'll be trying to make the best of the situation, but it's going to be challenging for them to be open and emotionally available for a little bit because of the guilt and burdens they may be releasing. For those of you that know this person, they came to you with this strong and passionate energy in the beginning, then I feel like you bonded quickly and connected so deeply it scared them and they went on full defense mode and started acting nonchalant. They are used to being in control and dominating others, but with you they feel a bit vulnerable. I see they may have started acting different with you and stopped doing the things they did to get you in the first place. Their energy switched up.
I feel like they really do love you and they don't quite know how to show you that. You're so gentle, kind, nurturing, and protective of them. They love you for who you are, and I feel like they have a vision for their future with you in it. They're just really anxious and scared of opening up to you because of their insecurities. They have trust issues and fear emotional intimacy. They feel like you're very self-assured and independent. You guys will share the same goals, values, and morals. I feel like they want to be a team with you and come together to make things work. They want to overcome challenges and obstacles together, but it's just taking time to get to where they feel open to expressing this to you. Cigarettes After Sex could be significant. I feel like for you, you haven't met the best type of people when it comes to relationships, and it sometimes makes you feel a lack of faith in love. They feel like you're looking ahead and trying your best to stay motivated and focused no matter what happens in life. You don't want to get too distracted or sad especially about them, but they feel your energy. They feel like you're in a low spirit and feeling a bit hurt emotionally. They've seen your best or at least your uplifted energy and they know you're struggling right now no matter how much you keep it together. I feel like they feel you're scared to love again, and you hide how you feel because of it. You don't normally open up about how you feel, it could be because of a lack of trust or fear. You might even be really cold at times even though you don't want to be. Even if you don't know this person, which most of you do but they will feel your energy heavily. I speak in the present moment because it's energy, but it doesn't mean it's happening now in this moment although it could be. I feel like you feel depleted of your compassion and sympathy, and they feel this too. They know you're very discerning and careful about who you love and where you invest your time, love, and energy. They actually admire how smart, independent, and compassionate you are. I feel like deep down they know you love so deeply. It's just the energy you give off.
The purpose of this relationship is to teach the both of you how to get out of your own heads and to open yourself up to new things in life. It's like the both of you are going to be in need of excitement, optimism, and passion. Life may be a little dull and this connection is going to brighten things up for the both of you. I feel like this is a divine relationship and together you will accomplish many things you didn't know you would. It's definitely going to teach you both how to be patient with good things. I also feel like you will both learn to deepen your faith and start listening to your intuition more often. I see both of you learning to let go of things that you deeply held onto for the sake of your own pride and learning how to trust in God's plan for your life. You both will be feeling more confident and like your best selves around each other and when you're apart you'll definitely feel each other's energy even stronger. I also feel like you will go through a lot with this person and it's going to show you that no matter how much time passes, how challenging things get, or how far apart you are, love will always win. Music will be a big thing between you as well. You and this person may overthink your feelings about each other because you never felt anything this deep. It's so easy to just walk away and settle for something less because putting in real time and effort is hard sometimes. It's hard to open up and truly be open with your love and show yourself for who you really are. But for this love, I see both of you learning to surrender and letting go of control.
I see them realizing they like themselves better with you and taking actions to open themselves up to you. I feel like they're going to be very excited when they pursue you about their feelings and they have this very gleeful, childlike energy when it comes to you. Not in an immature way either. It's like they feel safe and comfortable around you. You bring happiness into their life where they only felt darkness. I feel like they're putting down the swords and done being closed off about how they feel. They put themselves in a place to be in a combative energy towards you anytime you wanted to speak your mind to them. It's like they didn't want to understand you and didn't try to be open to a thing you said to them. They stuck to their beliefs and what they felt like they wanted to say or do and shut you out in a way. They're going to reciprocate the love you gave to them back to you. I feel like they're also reflecting back on good memories or conversations they had with you to remind them of how good it feels to be in your presence. They're gonna come in quickly and unexpectedly because they felt eager to act upon their feelings. They are confident things will be very good between you guys and there is so much potential to create in this relationship that they will be ready and determined to make it happen. Like I said before, if they entertained someone else or got with someone else, all they thought about was you. They love you and they been known this, they just never said anything because they were too much in their ego to act upon what they really wanted. I feel like the changes they needed to make, they weren't ready to make, and out of the literal blue you can expect them to express how they feel. If you don't know this person, I feel like you will get in a connection with someone not expecting of this to happen, but then it does and catches you off guard. Of course, every situation is different, but you will know where the pieces fit for your life. Your love moves this person in ways they can't even explain so know that they will mean whatever it is they say to you.
The advice for you is to move on from the past experiences, thoughts, feelings, and people that are interfering with you and your growth. I feel like you'll have let go of things that negatively impact your thoughts about love and this relationship in general. Move at your own pace when it comes to opening up emotionally and be more patient with yourself. There is no need to rush. Things will move at a steady pace for you two anyways because of how they feel as well. I feel like working on your confidence and building stability within yourself will help you in general and in the connection. There may be a certain attitude you've been feeling towards life at this time that may feel apathetic, unhappy, and just a bit miserable honestly. This is the time to focus on changing this, so it doesn't affect you or your relationship later down the road. It's time to let yourself live and experience the feeling of joy. Also let go of the fear of rejection. I know it's easier said than done, but it's affecting your self-esteem negatively to where you don't want to love or open yourself up anymore. You may tell yourself you're fine with being alone, you don't need to be in a relationship, you don't want to be with them anymore, but in reality you actually do. You're hurting over things they did that hurt you or over things from past relationships and it's putting you in a resentful and bitter type of energy. This is what you need to focus on in this very moment. Being mad and angry won't solve anything. It's okay to feel disappointed and upset, but do not live in that energy forever. Don't build your life around your pain. Learn from what happened in your past with them or in general so you can fully open up to this person. Don't allow gossip or other people to get in your head about them. You know how you feel. Other people don't really understand how you feel deep down about certain things and it's not good to always take advice from others. I also feel like if you gossip about things that happen in your love life, it's better to keep things to yourself. This new person or new energy of a current person is someone you are meant to be with. It'll work if both people are willing. You must be willing to do your part as well.
Pile Three:
Hi pile three! I feel like you and your current or next partner will feel like you are ride or die. I see you both sticking together and never against each other no matter what. I feel like even when you may argue or disagree you come back together quickly and always forgive each other. You also will be deeply intimate with each other in every way, and I feel like they'll never want to let you go. I'm feeling this energy like you both will have gone through a lot in terms of love, and taking deep breaths to relax yourself will benefit you greatly and help to loosen up a bit, especially if you've been feeling tense emotionally. I feel like for those of you who know this person already, they are sorry about neglecting you and not being as supportive and loving as they could've been. You may not trust them or have a hard time listening to anything they say because of how they've disappointed or betrayed you in some way. Take that how it resonates. For others I feel like sometimes you may doubt this person's love for you and not fully trust that they mean what they say because of your past. They will be a bit distracted or not as focused on you in the beginning of the connection/relationship because I feel like they may be focused on work, or something else is taking up their time and energy. I definitely see if this is a current relationship, you're going through a bit of a rough patch, and you don't feel as open and trusting when it comes to this person. They feel like they're going to have to dig deep within themselves to learn how to better express their love and make certain life changes because they don't want you to leave them or see you with someone else for that matter.
The relationship itself will be balanced and harmonious between you. I feel like you bring light to their world and help them understand themselves and love better than they ever have. I feel like the relationship is going to help both of you feel more complete and happier with each other. At times both of you feel dissatisfied and a lack of confidence in the connection because of fear. These fears are things that kept the both of you stuck and feeling like you had to escape this relationship or intimacy in general. I feel like both of you dealt with toxicity in love. I see you and this person are both people who overthink your feelings and experiences to the point where you may self-sabotage or make fear-based decisions at times. I feel like you and this person will be going through a phase in your life where work could be draining, you're dealing with family conflicts, conflict in your relationship, or just in life. Whatever it is, things have felt a bit cold and lonely emotionally, either during your current relationship or when you meet your new person. You're both going to be deeply in love but in the initial stages of the connection, I feel like things will be a little dull and not as emotional between you. I see them feeling a bit insecure and unsure of their self. I feel like they're learning their self-worth and trying to feel more grounded within themselves because the changes that are happening around them are a bit overwhelming and I feel like they're trying to embody an independent and self-assured energy. Sometimes they also may come off as very confident and like everything is fine, maybe even a bit egotistical at times. I feel like they're going to be trying to hold onto you and the relationship and trying to do just enough to keep you from leaving, but not enough to maintain the relationship. You may feel a bit sad and shut out by them in a way and I feel like they're too distracted to really notice or empathize with how you're feeling. They're going feel unhappy with what they have materialistically speaking and taking you for granted in a sense. It's like they're hyper focused on boosting themselves up and too scattered to actually see how they're affecting the connection. I see they feel deep love for you, but I see them trying to hide how they really feel and only reveal so much because they feel like how they feel is a burden to them in some way. I feel like in a way they are at a distance from you, and they feel like if they allow themselves to feel too much, they're going to lose control in some way. I feel like this person doesn't necessarily know how to multitask. They're also very scared of change. When they focus on the relationship, they really focus on it, but their main priorities or what they value more comes first. They could feel like in order to have a relationship for the long run they have to be financially stable. They want to feel good and abundant so they can share this with their partner. I feel like they just need someone who will believe in them and support them. Someone who will be patient. I see they will have their guard up and they're carrying this heavy weight because deep down they are actually so stressed out, they just don't share their burdens with others. I feel like they're going to be a little upset with themselves because they feel like they're missing out on some type of change or opportunity to physically be there with you, but they're trying to do things in a way they feel like is right. Take that how it resonates. For some of you, this person literally can't be there physically right now so they're focusing on what they can control. Whether that means they're incarcerated, in a different city/state, or somehow just not near you. They will open up to you about how they feel it's just going to take some patience. They'll need to let go of their ego and be more open to change and learn to balance their priorities out a bit more.
The energy they'll give off is someone who is very confident within themselves and I feel like they are someone who has game. They definitely pull people in a charming way. I feel like they are used to getting their way and with you things are different. They feel like they fell in love with you in a mysterious way. Almost like it was very sudden and unexpected. They didn't think things would go the way they did or will between you guys. I also feel like they will do things to test your love for them. Maybe intentionally or maybe just habitually speaking. They feel deeply for you, so they question whether you feel the same way. They give off this energy like they're going to be enjoying themselves and life. I also feel like they have a bit of an old school vibe. Like early 2000's player vibes. It's giving Justin Timberlake, Usher, Chris Brown. They're also very flirty and playful. I also feel like they're gonna feel like they enjoy being around you and things are fun. However, they don't feel like this is just some little one-night stand, summer fling type of thing. They want to love you. They just have this image they portray, and I feel like you see right past it. They hide their true feelings and I feel like intuitively you'll know this. They either already have or will be someone who gets caught up in the superficial things. I feel like they did have that image of trying to be someone who got it like that when they really don't. They're guarded in love and trying to pretend to be someone they aren't. Unfortunately, they're gonna need to slow down and take a deep look within and they are going to be forced to do this by divine intervention. I feel like they spend more money than they have, they love the finer things, and they feel materialistic things bring happiness, but they're going to come to realize that's not what makes them happy. They were impulsive, reckless, and a little too free spirited. I feel like they give off this foolish and naive energy. A bit childish even. However, it's their ego. Around the time when you are meeting or getting in a commitment with this person, I feel like they're going to be closing this chapter of their life and learning that they need to grow up. For some of you they messed up with you many times and they're going to want to make up for this. They're in this fantasy of not really knowing how to discern between what is temporary and what isn't. I feel like you just gotta have some patience with them because they are learning. Compassion is needed from you and even if they don't show that they appreciate it, they really do. They know you love them. Despite everything that you may have gone through with them and even them not understanding what temporary fulfillment is, through all this confusion they are only sure of one thing and that is you. You bring balance to their life. I feel like they're going to be going through some karma, legal matters, or a situation where they're facing the consequences of their actions in some way. So, if they're struggling it's just their karma and a valuable life lesson not to take things for granted, especially people who deeply love and care for them. If this is a current person, I feel like they're thinking of the gossip surrounding the connection with you and maybe just gossip about themselves too. They're guilty and if they deceived you, I'm hearing others know about this. Their ego just felt a need to prove others wrong, but they can't hide the truth about who they really are forever. The truth came to light and they're guilty about all of the wrong doings they have done. I feel like people they thought loved them deceived them too as a result of their karma for deceiving you and others and trying to manipulate the outcome of fate. I feel like they're starting to see how they may have judged you and treated you unfairly. They listened to another person gossip about you and made the mistake of taking their side. I feel like they released this person and they're seeing how they were deceived by them.
I see your person resting, trying to spend time self-reflecting, & trying to sleep off how they feel about everything. They want to protect this connection from outside interferences, and I see them healing. They're hoping for a miracle or something grand to happen that will bring change and growth into their life.
How they feel about you is like you lead them in a positive direction. They feel lost without you. You inspire them, motivate them, encourage them, love them, and your very supportive. I feel like you bring them so much joy and happiness. With you they have sight, and they feel a drive to change their life for the better. They want you. No matter how they may act or what front they put on, they want to be with you and only you. They regret not being there for you the way you deserve deep down. They had to do all these things just to distract themselves from feeling how they really feel about you. They want to admit it to you that they were wrong about how they may have acted or treated you and I feel like when they do they know you're going to take pride in it. But not in a bad way, you just know they were wrong and hearing them admit it to you is relieving. I feel like because you want to make sure they're aware of how they hurt you. I'm hearing the song "Here Comes the Sun". I feel like this is a sign clarity and healing are coming. Joy is on its way, and I feel like aside from the worldly things, they know they love you no matter what. This could be someone you grew up with or knew from a younger age for some of you. You've been there through it all. I feel like you met this person when they had nothing. You witnessed them change up and reach a higher point in life just to fall down. But there you are, there for them. You are their backbone. But it's been lonely waiting for them to reciprocate. You give and give, and they know it's their turn to give back. They don't want you to leave them or be unfaithful in some way. Maybe in the past for those of you who are with this person, you both deceived each other. They don't want this to happen and they're afraid you may be unfaithful to them. That's why communication is a bit difficult. Talking to them is challenging at times. They're a bit combative and I feel like they don't necessarily listen or hear you out. They also feel like you may be like this to them too. Even if you guys don't have a history of deceiving each other and this is all fresh, communication is still a bit challenging. Sometimes a little conflict can be healthy and create a feeling of passion between you when it's resolved but be sure not to let your ego just create stress and arguments for the sake of being right. I feel like now is a good time to just go with the flow and let things fall into place. You're a light in their life and I feel like they're at a standstill and feeling a bit stagnant with you right now, but it's because they're learning to see things from a different perspective. You're a bit irritated with them, because of how they've treated you but the best thing to do is reflect and take some time to relax and think before you rush into speaking your mind or acting a certain way towards them. Having more compassion always helps, even when you're tired of loving. If you're overly stressed take a step back and ground yourself. I feel like they just want to get past this with you. All of the challenges and obstacles you've been through together, they just want to overcome these hard times with you. They know the easiest thing to do is leave and maybe that's what they did instead of working things out with you because they know when you speak your mind you really speak it. They could be scared to really open up about how they feel because they know how you feel and how you're upset. They also know how you communicate when you're stressed, you can be a bit hostile or irritable, but for good reason. I see them letting go of this victim mentality and realizing the pain and disappointment they've caused you too. They feel like you guys complete each other and I see them wanting to marry you. Acts of service could be a love language here and I see them really wanting to take care of you and just support you. I'm hearing "in sickness and health". They're finally going to see the way forward with you clearly. I feel like they want to build with you and create success together.
They also feel like you have too much pride too sometimes. Your egos clash, but I see you letting go of your pride and just opening up to them. You’re tired of fighting, arguing, not talking, or just always wanting to be right and so are they. I feel like no one is truly right and both of you are in the wrong in your own ways.
The purpose of this relationship is to teach both of you how to be true to yourselves. I see you both learning to set healthier boundaries and how to express your true feelings positively. This person is learning how to mature emotionally meanwhile you’re learning to mature mentally and change the way you perceive and see into situations. You both bring each other so much joy and love. I feel like you also heal each other’s inner child. I see you both creating the family and home life you’ve always wanted as a child. That revolves around stability, love, security, peace, safety, & a foundation that isn’t temporary. I feel like you both want to have a good life. I mean who doesn’t you know? But together you will both complement each other in ways that are perfect. I feel like you were both divinely made for each other. That’s cliche but it’s true. This is a connection God is helping to be restored and healed. You both could’ve even prayed for God to mend things between you in some way. I see both of you strengthening your faith and learning how to be optimistic even in the hardest of times. You’re both stronger and able to endure more things in life because of everything you’ve been through or will go through together. All things will work together for the greater good.
Their next actions are to heal and spend time self reflecting learning more about themselves. I see them alone, in solitude trying to understand how they feel and why they do the things they do. It’s like they’re trying to understand how everything they’ve ever done led up to the point they’re already in or will be. Especially in the relationship I feel like they want to learn from their mistakes and change their approach. They want to love you better and be better for the connection and for themselves. They are tired of temporary things. I see them learning their worth and how to truly value themselves and love. They’re learning to have respect, understanding, compassion, and patience. I also feel like they’re someone who was stuck in their ways for a long time. I see them gaining clarity about the person they were and how their actions affected this connection or how they love in general. They will express their feelings to you and come clean about how much they’ve been hiding in terms of their love for you. I also see an apology for some of you. I also see they’re going to be more dedicated and faithful. I see them being more perseverant and not giving up at first sight of complications. They’re learning that facing challenges head on and learning to work through them and problem solve is better than just running and ignoring the problems they face. Especially when it comes to saying what needs to be said and doing what needs to be done. They’re maturing in ways they’ve never imagined. Obviously there is always a point in life where we must literally grow up and face things that are uncomfortable in our adult life and they’re learning that those temporary ways and things from their teenage years or young adult life isn’t the way to live forever. Life isn’t always going to be all fun and carelessly adventurous. We must take the time, energy, and effort to nurture and care for the things we want to grow. We can’t just be flighty and scattered all the time and expect things to flourish in a productive and long term way. I see them learning this and making the changes to be more diligent and practical about their approach to the relationship and their life. I also see them being more appreciative of you and the good things in life. They’re going to be more responsible and I see them developing integrity.
The advice for you is to be more patient. Love yourself more, forgive, and take the time to nurture those parts of you that feel most vulnerable. I feel like if you’re stressed out and feeling very tense that is a sign you need time to ground yourself and pull your energy back towards you. Find ways to create peace and stability emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. You don’t want to take out negative feelings on others accidentally or unintentionally. It’s easy to project our fears and insecurities on others when we are overwhelmed or burdened by thoughts. It’s also good to communicate how we feel, but not coming from a scattered or negative way. Communicate your emotions in a healthy way not in a way where you are blaming others or being a bit insensitive. Carefully express how you feel. Giving yourself the time to feel your emotions and sort them out before explaining them always helps. I also feel like be careful and discerning about who you consult in for advice. Don’t always listen to others opinions or feelings about your situations. Nobody knows what’s best for you like you do. Sometimes people will have good advice for you, but not always. Not everyone understands your situation and some people are biased. I feel like you can overthink your feelings and experiences at times and it puts you in a place of fear and self sabotage. You may feel trapped in your mind and the hurt replays over and over in your mind. Know that your life doesn’t only consist of betrayal and deception. It’s not meant to be continuously painful. It’s all about how you see it and your perspective on your experiences. Do you try to see things positively? There is a lesson in everything you go through & even if you don’t understand things right away you will in time. But it doesn’t mean to stop living and enjoying life when you feel hurt. Life involves taking chances and risks because you never know what may happen. But how will you learn and experience things if you don’t allow yourself to? Moving past betrayal and traumatic experiences is important for your growth and your future. Self reflection and spending time in solitude will help you understand yourself better and how you feel. You will overcome every challenge you face even if it doesn’t seem like it. Time never stops and you heal with time even when you don’t want to or have a hard time moving forward. You are forced to move forward always. It’s good to listen to other peoples ideas or plans and come together with people who inspire you or help you grow. Even if it’s forgiving those who have hurt you and working with them to create a better outcome. You gotta learn to trust yourself more and tap into your inner voice. Not your fear or your critical mind, your intuitive side. Your inner wisdom. Be more kind to yourself too. I feel like you may be self critical at times and overthink the negative things you don’t like about yourself and others. Change the way you approach others and situations. Cultivate the feeling of confidence and strength. Find what moves you. What brings you joy and creativity? I also feel like when someone hurts you or is a bit rude and judgmental over you, try to remain calm and collected. It’s best to approach situations kindly and mindfully. Don’t react impulsively and irrationally. It’s time to get out of your head and more into your physical life. That involves making changes, taking action, leading your life in a more positive direction. Rather than staying still and overthinking everything, start doing and feeling. Own your energy and show off that confidence!
Pile Four:
Hi pile four! I feel like your person is in love with you and no matter what happens they love you. Even if you aren’t talking they just want you to know they deeply care for you and I feel like they hope you feel the same for them. They also think about you a lot and people think their crazy for feeling so deeply for you but they won’t deny their love. I also feel like some of you may meet this person after an ending of a tough relationship. Others of you already know this person and after a tough phase of your relationship with them I feel like you’re in this energy of feeling a bit triggered by them, but you’re independent and I see you focused on positive things and moving forward no matter what. You don’t let things get to you and control the way you behave or live your life. I feel like you’re very confident and true to yourself. You know your worth and you know when to set the limit and establish boundaries. You’re very passionate and strong willed. I feel like they love this about you. I feel that after facing tough challenges, obstacles, setbacks, and hard situations you’re maturing and evolving in every way. I feel like something someone else or this person did triggered you and pushed you to endure painful things that pushed you into becoming who you truly are.
I feel like if you guys ever argue or get into tough situations they will want to resolve it quickly because they don’t like to be on bad terms with you. Especially over little things. They feel it’s a waste of energy to be mad or angry. They’d rather be loving you and enjoying things. I feel like you both can’t sleep and you struggle a bit when you’re upset with each other. I see that you got them invested in you. They want to change their ways and love you in the way you deserve. I’m not even hyping you up but the energy doesn’t lie. I feel like things will be very balanced between you and this is someone you will build with financially and romantically. The type of relationship you’ll have for the long run. I feel like you dealt with that noncommittal, doubtful, & unfaithful energy. Either from them or your past relationship. I feel like you’re fighting for love and you’ve endured so much loss and hardship just trying to get the things you want in life. In this relationship I feel like you may be a bit tired and emotionally drained in a way because of all you’ve experienced. There is deep love and passion here but I see you’re going to be struggling with feeling enthusiastic and empathetic because of some type of deception you’ve dealt with. Your trust isn’t there as much as it could be and you’re guarded. I feel like you’re being logical and taking your time with opening yourself up instead of just acting on a desire or a temporary feeling. You’re standing on business fr. I see you don’t let people in easily and they’re gonna have to fight for your love. It’s like prove it. “Don’t say it to me, I want you to show me” energy. You’re letting go of past energies and feelings and just going through a massive change. I feel like you’re ready for new things and making healthier decisions in love and life overall. You’ve been broke down and completely hurt in terms of love and you aren’t tolerating any less than you deserve. I feel like In the beginning of the relationship things will be challenging and they’ll take time to progress. You’re very loving, nurturing, and empathetic but you are also very generous with your love and I feel that you’ve been taken advantage of in the past so you won’t come off as this right away. You are going to be getting over insecurities and letting go of bad habits that create fear. I feel like you’re guarding your heart and protecting your energy so you don’t get manipulated or charmed. For some of you if this is a current partner, they may have did this to you and you’re just not having it. I see you focused on yourself and growing. Although you will love this person you won’t be very open at first. Things are a bit mysterious here and I feel like sometimes it’s hard for them to read your energy and understand how you really feel. You’re very independent and self assured and I feel like they know you don’t need anyone so apart of them feels insecure and like they aren’t good enough for you. They’re used to toxic relationships and codependency but you aren’t like this. You aren’t controlling and obsessive. You’re grounded and you know what you want and you’re very sure of yourself. I mainly see that in the beginning things will be moving slowly and you‘ll be making this person work for your love in a positive way. You have self control and I feel like your not just someone who does things in a irrational and uncontrolled way. You influence and lead others and you push this person to have to change and grow in order to be with you. Your standards for love are high. I feel like they even tried to tell you what they think you want to hear just to get you more invested, but they aren’t fooling anyone. They don’t know how to approach you and I feel like they’re a lil bit intimidated. They may even ask other people for help to try and be smarter about their approach. I see them trying hard to attract you. Im hearing “come correct, or don’t come at all”.
The energy they’ll be in is feeling accomplished and successful. They see building a relationship with you as a goal. They want you in their life for the long run and they’re giving this energy like they’re ready to commit and invest in a life with you. I also see marriage strongly. They’re someone who is learning how to express themselves and they’re doing all they can to study you and new things overall. They’re a bit shy too. At least with you they are when it comes to talking about their feelings. I see they’re someone who watches and tries to calculate all their steps and they get information about you from others or they have ways of finding things out. They watch you or observe all that you do so they can learn to read you. I see them working on their financial stability and how to create long term opportunities. They want to feel successful and happy with you and in life in general and they’re spending time alone educating themselves on all the things they want to invest in. They never really had joy that lasts and they want this. They’re tired of the temporary things and I feel like them spending time alone is helping them cleanse their energy and life of the things that do not serve them or the connection with you. They feel a bit rejected by you because they may have approached you in a way that was flirty and a lil bit immature and after asking for help from others or something like that they were able to get a response or reaction from you in some way. They’re learning how to approach you and what you like from a partner. I see them learning to love you in your love language. They know this love is worth putting in the time and effort for. They don’t know how you got them the way you do but you just move them in ways no one can. I feel like they are learning deep lessons and becoming more self aware. They’re definitely going to be very determined and focused on building and investing. So if that means they’re working overtime or just doing things with more care, effort, and patience it’s because they’re creating stability and security so they can invest in a future with you. They might even be private about their feelings or not as open and affectionate towards you. Their energy changed after you may have rejected them in a way and it’s because they’re showing you instead of trying to explain it. For some of you I see them literally writing you a hand written letter, song, or poem.
They feel like you want something grand. Like they know your standards are high and you don’t accept the bare minimum. I feel like they’re going to surprise you in some way. They feel you’re not being as open and expressive with your love right away. They feel your energy and they see how you’re focused on your goals and more permanent things. They see you as someone who is very faithful, loyal, and caring. They feel you’re determined to get what you want and they see how disciplined and goal oriented you are. They know you aren’t going to make foolish or impulsive decisions. They feel like you express the deepest part of yourself when you know it’s safe to. Even though you are open and genuine, you don’t just submit quickly. It takes time and trust for you to open up wholeheartedly. It takes literal action and change for you to believe someone is actually invested in you for the right reasons. You don’t waste your time or energy. For those who are currently with this person, they feel like they pushed you to be this way because of how they‘ve hurt you. They feel like they know your pain and they understand how you feel because they’ve been betrayed too. They want to heal with you and I feel like they see how you’ve grown and overcome so much. They’re inspired by your growth and how much you’ve changed. I feel like you’ve come out of a place of depression and apathy and they see how your depression and sadness has turned you into someone who is careful and smart about everything you do. Even with who you spend your time with. You turn them on and they’re doing things for you they’ve never done before. For current relationships, I feel like they miss you and they need you more than you know. They feel like you know more about love than they do and they’re trying to show you how they’re learning how to love you. They’re trying to show you that they’re changing. They’re seeing you turn dreams into reality and you don’t want to just live in this fantasy of what things could be. You go out and actually make things happen or at least try to. They’re beyond grateful to have you in their life and they see you’re very grateful yourself. For some of you, you have a baby with this person and they’re so thankful you’re the one they have a baby with. They see how you sometimes are a perfectionist and you fear things going a way that doesn’t serve your interests but not in a negative way. You’re just very calculated and you plan things out in a very organized and strategic way. You’re very protective over your energy and your heart and they feel like right now you’re being patient with yourself and in this period of rest and rejuvenation. You’re healing and creating balance within yourself and your life. I feel like they may feel you have a fear of abandonment and you fear getting too close or letting someone really close to you because they may just up and leave you. You’ve been betrayed either by them or yes a past person and they are aware of how you are when it comes to trusting. They are co-dependent on you right now because they need you. They need your help, your support, your advice, your love, your kindness. Just you in general. They’re scared to lose you and they feel like you’re the only one who genuinely cares for them. They’re trying to reciprocate what you give and love you in the way you need to be loved. You give them what they need and they’re so thankful for you. They may not show it yet but they are trying to. They’re working behind the scenes to prove it to you. They even think about you before they go to sleep and they think about kissing you. I’m hearing the song candy kisses when she says “like a kid in a candy store, always wanting to come back for more”. They’re realizing with you the love is true and they don’t want to miss another second with you. The love between you guys is insanely deep.
The purpose of this relationship is to teach you both about a long term relationship and a love that is meant to last. This connection is one that is made for marriage. It’s all about planning, determination, patience, and discipline. I definitely feel like this person is going to purpose to you for some of you. Take that how it resonates. This relationship is going to teach you to let go of things that need to be released and I see this is a blessing for the both of you from God. It is meant to show you that good things take time and all the hard work and energy you give always pays off in due time. I see you’re meant to have a family and build a foundation with this person. Whether it be creating a business together, a big family legacy, or just something that creates generational wealth and stability. You’re creating a line of abundance, security, happiness, and joy. This is a such a good vibe I get from your connection and no matter how hard things get between you, I feel like you always come back together. This is a big lesson for this person especially. They were immature and a player. I feel like they chose to give their heart to you and change their ways to keep you in their life. They learned how to change and step into their divine masculine or embody the energy they needed in order to take initiative and lead themselves and others in a positive way. I see you both sacrificing temporary things in order to build together. God is with y’all!!
I see them using the time they have alone or in separation from you to self reflect and tap into their inner voice. They’re learning more about themselves and how to guide themselves using the wisdom they’ve gained. They’re just waiting for some type of miracle or something to happen to give them this epiphany on what to do. They feel kinda stuck like they don’t know what next action or step to take and they’re going a lil crazy thinking about you, missing you, or wanting to be with you. I see an apology for some of you coming in. They’re sorry about how they may have disappointed you. They’re stressed out and they don’t feel as successful as they want to be. They feel like with you things aren’t moving the way they want them too as well. They’re feeling stuck and they need your comfort and your love right now because they’re going through some pressure and overwhelming situations. They’re coming out of indecision and I see them making a choice to show up and prove themselves to you. They wasted your love and took it for granted in some way or for others they feel like your love hasn’t been appreciated the way it should be and I see them coming towards you with a gift, opportunity, or offer in some way. They’re done with this challenging energy they may have had. I feel like they had other options or people interfering with their feelings and they’re seeing things more clearly. They’re sad and trying their best to be positive. I feel like when they come towards you it’s because they genuinely need you to be there for them and support them. They need you and even if they may not express it in a very emotional way or literally ask for it, they will mean what they say. They felt love at first sight with you and they been knew it was real they just weren’t ready in that moment to commit. You’re a bit stubborn and I feel like your heart is very guarded and I see they will be trying their very best to get close to you, especially with all the stress and pressure that they’re under they’re still trying to make the time to show up and give you what you need.
The advice for you is to let go of any hostility or the need to be right. Fighting won’t solve anything and I feel like being defensive and blocking this person out isn’t either. It’ll be a time to have compassion and love. Whether it’s now or later. Whenever this person is in your life. It is safe to love and right now it’s important to spend time doing productive things. Don’t gossip or tell everyone your business about this relationship either. Like friends or what not. Not everyone needs to be in the mix. I feel like you and this person will be connecting deeply and building a friendship together. Things may be lonely and a little bit sad right now for you but spirit is saying to stop and don’t isolate yourself any longer. You’ve been lonely and feeling down and it’s important not to rush anything including yourself. I feel like if there’s people in your life that aren’t healthy or positively influencing you it’s time to let them go. Creating change by doing things differently and letting go of things that aren’t good for you will help you bring this in a bit faster. Also be sure to let go of any judgmental energy you may have. You’re healing from betrayal and past trauma and you don’t want to keep going in circles so be sure to self reflect and connect with yourself deeply so you can find healthy ways of coping with your negative feelings instead of talking about them with others and creating more negativity for yourself. You may be a lil bit judgmental over yourself and the negative feelings you face and spirit is saying to feel them through and release them. Be more private and try your best to reflect on the feelings you feel so you can better understand the root of them or why you’re still feeling down. It’s best to focus on yourself especially if you’re feeling lonely. When you feel lonely it’s for a reason and if you’re in this period of being pushed into solitude it’s because that’s what you need to cleanse and rid yourself of the negative energy weighing on you.
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Who are you in their eyes? (PAC)
💭How does your friend, partner, crush, colleague, family member, or anyone in your mind view you? REMINDER! This is a general reading & purely their perception of you, take what resonates.
✨How to select your pile?✨
1. Slow your breathing, taking deep inhales. Focus on feeling present in your environment.
2. Looking from left to right, use your intuition to pick the pile meant for you (what you connect most with.)
3. Doesn't resonate? No worries! Pick another, it's message may be just right for you.
!!For Entertainment Purposes Only!!
Pile 1 -> Pile 2
Pile 3 -> Pile 4
🍃Pile 1 ;
Cards: 8 of Wands, Queen of Swords, Queen of Pentacles, King of Pentacles, 6 of Cups
The person in your mind could be someone from your past, perhaps a childhood friend, a classmate, or a family member. If not from your past, either you or them remind each other of a person you guys used to know, maybe they even perform a hobby you dropped, just something from the past. There is a lot of nostalgia here, and the reason why is because they possibly watched you grow up, or knew you from the past and reconnected again in the future, and they are shocked by how well you seem to be doing. The first thing I heard is "I'm so proud of you." They think you are somewhat of a go-getter, and most certainly financially stable. They perceive you as someone who invested a lot of time and effort in developing yourself. This energy feels so nice! They just think you're super mature, that you handle problems well, you're emotionally mature, etc. You just have your shit together, according to them. You may be able to "feel like a kid again", and overall have a lot of fun with this person, and they think the same. It's giving the vibe of "Wow, it's been that long, huh?" Overall, what they think of you is purely positive, and pretty lighthearted!
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🍀Pile 2 ;
Cards: 3 of swords, 10 of swords, Page of wands, Queen of Pentacles , 8 of Swords
They think you're STRONG. From perception, they think that you've gone through something completely heartbreaking and life-changing, then brushed off your knees and got going again. They think you have such a strong demeanor, like I'm hearing "After all that?" They sense that you've gone through something transformative, like they see that spark in your eyes to use your heartbreak as a reason to strive. This could be letting go of old habits and past traumas. They are honestly baffled how you can keep going. They think you endured a lot emotionally, or resurfaced from a pretty dark place. You're pretty financially okay to them, or near the path to being there. This person could actually be someone that helped you as you were going through your struggles, providing an opportunity for you. You're like a go-getter, not settling for anything other than what you deserve.
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🍀Pile 3 ;
Cards: Temperance, Page of Pentacles, 7 of Pentacles, 3 of Pentacles, The Emperor, Ace of Swords
The person you're thinking about may be a mentor, a teacher, or someone with experience and influence that gives you a lot of inspiration. I get very strongly that they passed down some intellect to you. They think you're starting out in a new field, but already low-key mastering it lmao. You're going to be pretty bloody quick to succeed. To them, you are pretty focused on yourself, perhaps focusing greatly on aligning your career to your passions, and working hard in all aspects of your life. I'm hearing "They have a lot of potential." so they view you as a person with a lot of skills and expect you to quickly master anything new. They think you are well-rounded and leading a pretty average lifestyle, actually. They think that you're certainly passionate, but not dreaming very big for your future. You're a balanced person in their eyes, very reliable. At first, they would think you're shy or socially awkward haha. They might even be shocked at your progress, like you'll outdo the master!
~~~~🍃
🍀Pile 4 ;
Cards: 2 of Cups, Queen of Pentacles, Queen of Wands, Wheel of Fortune.
While shuffling your cards, a bunch flew out super quick! This person would form a strong opinion of you upon first meeting you, and if you know this person closely already, they would be quick to answer if someone asks what they think of you. You are someone that would've stood out for them, even in mind. They perceive you as someone sociable, seeing you around other people very often. They think you have a stable income or can afford to be leisurely and have fun, and that you were born privileged. They think you're pretty lucky tbh, I'm hearing "They won in life". I'm getting a vibe that this person may be insecure about their assets, or at least need to develop themselves emotionally. They think they are out of your league, and that you are going to be veryyyy different from them, like a whole different level. They think that you've got good habits, they idolize you a bit imho. Looking past that, they think that both you and them have a lot to learn from each other. They think you're steady in life, while also fun-loving. This could be a romantic interest, but this also applied well for platonic relationships!
~~🍃 You reached the end of the reading, 'till next time!
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♡ what they look for in a girl
[stan marsh x reader] ; [kyle brof. x reader]
[kenny mc. x reader] ; [leopold butters stotch x reader]
[tolkien b. x reader] 🟊
gender : female
cws : minor nsfw
requested : yes! thank you anon !
relationship : none mentioned
authors note : i wanted to write what they look for in personality traits, instead of appearance, hope that was okay!
NOTICE : as always, these characters are aged up to be in college 19/20+!
stanley marsh :
♡ i feel like he'd really want someone who is comfortable with silence, like being alone together in the same room doing separate things, yet enjoying each others presence. i think quiet time/being able to be around each other while being quiet is important to him, since he has to deal with so much talking in south park in general.
♡ i also think he's want someone who's really stable in his life. like he wouldn't necessarily want a girl who's always mentally stable, but more like he wants to be able to depend on someone especially during harder moments when he's struggling. he’d want to find stability in your relationship.
♡ definitely wants a girl who can take their relationship seriously but also who can kind of be playful at times. since stan is kind of a ticking time bomb, he'll want someone who's kind of also emotionally smart enough to tell when something is off with him because he struggles with expressing those same emotions.
♡ trust. this one is probably the biggest one for stan, he needs stability and trust in a relationship with anyone. he needs to be able to trust you'll be honest with him.
♡ i think all of this combined with support and love for him is what he looks for in a partner :)
kyle broflovski :
♡ as i'm sure everyone knows, he'd want someone very family oriented! even if you aren't close with your own family, as long as you care about having a family in the future, or are close to his own family i think that's good enough for him.
♡ would also really want someone to be on good terms with his mom and ike, since his dad is fairly easy to get along with and his mom is very much the head of the household - he'd want a girl to get along with her - even if that means looking at his baby photos with her.
♡ also would want someone who might be interested in religion, or at the very least doesn't make fun of him for his own.
♡ looks for communication in relationships, especially if he did something wrong? he’d want to know as soon as it happened. he’s probably a bit worried of losing you, or being abandoned by you because of heidi and that whole situation, so someone who can easily communicate their issues are reassure him everything is okay and stable in their relationship is perfect for him.
♡ i get the impression that his standards are kind of on the floor, with his mistreatment from cartman and heidi both, he just wants someone who won't leave him or make fun of him or his insecurities.
kenny mccormick :
♡ definitely wants a girl who will try anything once, if you catch my drift. especially if you'll initiate it as well? or seem invested in trying something new with him :)
♡ i feel like he’d really like someone to crack jokes with. i think he shares eric’s similar sense of humor but doesn’t actually want to full blown do the whole ‘eric’ thing all the time (ie dealing with cartman). sometimes i think he just wants to make a lil bit of fun with you! you know?
♡ he’d probably also want someone who’s a little more on the adventurous side, who’s probably a bit ambitious, again someone who’d be willing to try anything once. he probably really wants someone around who can also have their own wild side!
♡ also probably looks for someone who is kind to karen, especially if it means her crashing your guys dates.
♡ overall i feel like he doesn't have a huuuge preference, but more like he just wants someone he can get along with! definitely someone with a sense of humor similar to him.
leopold butters stotch :
♡ this is just my totally personal opinion but i feel like he'd really like someone also outgoing and also understanding? he might always be worried he's messing up or something while being with you, but would want you to be understanding when he makes a mistake.
♡ a little bit of chaos goes a long way. someone who will be able to create a little chaos with him from time to time would definitely be something he wants in a girl.
♡ playful intimacy, he doesn't wanna feel insecure with those intimate moments he has with you, but i think a little bit of playfulness with each other would totally brighten his day.
♡ i feel like he'd really look for a sense of belonging in a girl, somewhere where he fits in, and feels safe. since he doesn't get a lot of that at home, he'd really want to feel far from his home around a girl.
♡ to be honest i don't think butters thinks too much about what he wants, it just kind of happens for him.
tolkien black :
♡ i feel like tolkien probably looks for someone who's really good at communicating. he'd want to avoid any and all drama, considering he's got enough of it just living in south park normally.
♡ this one is kind of a given, but i feel like he'd want a girl who's more on the mature side, similar to stan but in a different way. he'd want a girl with more of her own interests and things that she enjoys. he really wants someone who's able to talk to him about mature things and not have to be worried too much that you won't take it seriously.
♡ someone self confident i imagine, i think he already has enough going on that he doesn't necessarily want to be worried about you on top of his family and everything else. which isn't to say he won't support you during your down moments, but being confident in yourself is probably a big one for him.
♡ this all ties in with the other ones, but self reliance and being good to yourself is probably big for him, again he doesn't wanna be in charge of you but will definitely take care of you when you need it - you know?
♡ overall, he just wants someone who's a bit normal or at least a bit less hectic or crazy than the rest of south park.
#south park x reader#south park x y/n#south park#kyle x reader#kyle broflovski#tolkien x reader#token x reader#kenny x reader#kenny mccormick x reader#butters stotch x reader#leopold butters stotch x reader#stan x y/n#stan x reader
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A note about Carlos, mostly about Jeddah
I gotta rant because I've just been seeing a lot of opinions about what has happened to Carlos within the last week. And instead of just going under every single post explaining why you're wrong, I'm just going to write an essay. The real tumblr experience is getting emotionally invested in something, and putting more effort into your writing on here than school or work. With that being said, if you dislike Carlos then this is not the post for you 🤷♀️
The "This is the first time Ferrari has felt like a family in a long time" comments are very mean. It's actually been bothering me since last Friday. Y'all saw a man visibility sick from a condition, and he probably knew he shouldn't have jumped in the car in the first place, try and persevere just for our entertainment/ his dedication to the team, just to say that it felt more like a family when he wasn't driving has rubbed me the wrong way. Granted, I think it was dumb for him to leave the hospital against doctor's orders and go to the paddock. However, that shows how passionate he is about Ferrari. He did not have to send message wishing Ollie good luck, or show up to the Ferrari garage to watch the race in person. But he did it anyways because he genuinely loves Ferrari and has done so much for the team (you guys who continuously say that he's not a team player do not watch the same race as i do or you just straight up don't like him. But don't discredit him because you feel some type of way for whatever reason). You don't need to hear it come out of Carlos's mouth to hear how heartbreaking that is. It's his last year with the team, and he has one less chance to drive the car he's been working his whole career towards driving. Why is it that he's spoken endlessly about how much he loves Ferrari and some of y'all have convinced yourself that he doesn't. Saying that because his family members like tweets or share Instagram stories that you don't agree with is such a cop-out excuse. From what I have seen, nothing he has said or done would lead me to believe that he's not truly a dedicated member of the Ferrari family. Yes Ferrari has had periods where the team was very disjointed and fragmented. But here in 2024, that is not the case.
#honestly i wish drivers had more freedom to say whatever they want#because if i was carlos I'd tell y'all to go fuck yourselves#and not to bring lewis into everything but i see how some tifosi move#the same ones saying that carlos isn't really dedicated to ferrari will be the same ones criticizing lewis's every move#saying stuff like “he's not really part of the ferrari family”#like you know these people personally#please just be honest and say what you really mean: you don't want carlos to be on the grid period#i would prefer you say something like that than just making stuff up tbh#f1#formula 1#carlos sainz#like carlos get behind me please
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Can I just say how much I appreciate the diversity of ace identities in ISAT and all the detail about it?
(spoilers ahoy)
I love how at first Sif sees the porn scroll as "people doing fun things" but later admits it doesn't interest them at all. Their first response is to say what they know they're "supposed" to think it is, what everyone else is probably going to think it is. But then they learn that it's really ok to admit that they're not into it.
At first Sif is like "why does Beau like me?" but after a while they start to find him cute because they understand the emotion behind his feelings, and while they're not sure if they can actually take it as far as a sexual relationship, they're interested in figuring it out, because for them, that doesn't gross them out, it's just not a drive. This is so relatable to me and I love seeing it bc it's not the typical ace in fiction where like, this character is ace so we mustn't put them in a ship because we should assume it'd gross them out. Sif can be ace but not entirely horrified by sex, and Sif may be romantic (I don't know if even Sif knows whether they are romantic or not)-- I suspect they are demiromantic because it's the intimacy and familiarity of Beau's emotions that makes them start to feel things about the moment by the tree, to the point where they miss it when he doesn't try.
Mirabelle going through the dating service papers is the most wonderful scene because this is what it was like to be ace when I was in my early twenties. Most people didn't know it was a thing, and friends/family were very helpfully concerned that you should find a partner in order to not be alone, because the theory was that it was a basic human need for everyone. I did exactly what Mirabelle did, and had the same kind of reaction: "I have to pick one of these people to try dating because I have to figure out how to be sexually interested in someone so that I can do the whole partnership thing that everyone says you need to do in order to have a fulfilling adult life." Looking at pictures of people trying to figure out how to be attracted to them, or what you like, when the answer is really that you're just Not. And you're kind of torn because some part of you knows that this isn't going to work, but the other part of you legit believes that it's like staying hydrated, you have to do it for your own good even if you're not thirsty.
Mirabelle's being into fictional romance and shipping, just not into doing it herself, is also such a good detail. I'm not aro so I can't speak to that myself, but still, it's a thing. She's emotionally invested in the dynamics between people, she loves watching the details of how they play out, and that's completely separate from ever wanting to do it herself. I've seen it in others and I definitely get that from the perspective of an ace person reading smut-- you can very much enjoy a dynamic without wanting to BE in the dynamic yourself.
Sif coming to understand how attraction works from the outside: "Wait, you can't choose who you get a crush on? That explains so much!" The line made me wince because it's so self-deprecating-- they're probably thinking they're not good enough for Beau-- but I also very much appreciate the realism of how... nobody explains to you how attraction works because they assume you know what it's like, and you probably don't ask because it's embarrassing if they assume that you're an immature late bloomer with no experience of the world, rather than someone who will never have a libido no matter what they've seen.
It's so easy to feel infantilized or to infantilize yourself if you're not comfortable with your ace identity. Both Mirabelle and Sif are young enough that they struggle a bit with whether this is really their identity or whether they've just not figured it out yet. In reality, at their age, this probably IS who they are. But they're also a bit hesitant to rule it out because it's really hard to know that you are NOT something, and (given that Mirabelle hadn't really considered the possibility that she's aroace) the culture doesn't seem to have a lot of representation or support for the idea. It's obvious to the player, well, if this is how they feel, then they're ace! But neither one of them can quite settle on that for sure. Because, unlike being attracted to someone where you can go "well that sure did happen", being not attracted to someone is a nonproof. So Mirabelle keeps trying, and Sif doesn't know that their reaction will seem valid to others (as evidenced by the change in how they describe the scroll).
Odile, who is aro and who seems to be not entirely ace but isn't exactly the thirstiest plant in the garden, has a different position. She seems to pretty much know where she's at, which makes sense for her age, but we can't really tell if she's always been okay with it or if it's been an issue. We don't know if Ka Bu is a more uptight culture, or how long society has been normalizing non-hetero identities, but we do know she had no female role models, so if any of this heteronormative business was an issue, I imagine it contributed a lot to her feeling of outsiderness. I'd love to know more about how Odile's sexuality impacted her life but she's obviously not about to infodump it on a bunch of 20 year olds, so it remains a mystery. Nonetheless it's pretty great that there's an older aro character, illustrating that people have always been this way, it's just easier for young people to discover it now because they feel more allowed to not be heterosexual.
[eta: @butterflyknifepoisoning reminded me that I've misremembered this and Odile isn't actually aro, she's had hatecrushes before and explained them to Mirabelle. Which I kind of sort of remember now! Not sure why I thought she was aro, my memory is crap sometimes. It's still a far cry from yamato nadeshiko, but yeah. Point taken]
...In the end, I find it extremely refreshing that there's a whole RPG party here and only ONE of them experiences sexual attraction, and it's a flamboyant gay-seeming dude with a poorly-kept-secret crush on an enby they/he. ISAT is so cool, it's the best aroace representation I have seen in fiction so far ever.
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The reason I find Shang Qinghua so fascinating is because his life is terrible and familiar
What little facts we learn about his pre transmigration life is:
1. He was estranged from both his parents as they were much more invested in their new families
2. Because of that it's implied he was neglected. We only know for sure that while his dad paid his tution and living expenses he often "forgot"
3. He ended up writing proclivity based on what the comments liked or disliked because he was pandoring as it was his main source of income and because of that
4. He deliberately farmed hate comments because that was still engagement
But what we can infer about his life from the other characters is so much more
Luo Binghe: Luo Binghe is constantly hurt as a child by adults and people in authority who should be taking care of him. So he has attachment issues, trust issues, and in the original novel ends up in a lot of meaningless heterosexual sexual encounters that are devoid of emotional depth but let him play caretaker and accept affection as shallow as it can be. He also spends a good portion of his existence in dreams
Luo Binghe is obviously a self insert power fantasy. Through him Shang Qinghua was able to get revenge on those who hurt him and be powerful. But because Shang Qinghua (who may or may not have known he was gay) was filling his novel, that he has once dreamed of being art, with sex to please a bunch of straight men...no wonder the sex was devoid of emotion and left Luo Binghe as fundamentally hollow inside unable to fill the void in his soul. Because while PIDW paid the bills it was emotionally unsatisfying to Shang Qinghua
Luo Binghe is also written to be manipulative and I think that's a dark version of Shang Qinghua's need to fill a role and be what people need of him
Which brings us to:
Yue Qingyuan: Yue Qingyuan always has a smile on his face and strives to be pleasant and to fix problems between other people even when he's rejected for it and he constantly is failing to reach those he really needs to. Too afraid to speak his truth even as he has a sword of Damocles hanging over his head
This is the the other side of Shang Qinghua's people pleasing. This is a child who feels he has to fix his parents divorce and feeling like it's his fault. This is Shang Qinghua never feeling good enough
Original Shen Qingqiu: Shen Qingqiu is able to be the petty spiteful bitch Shang Qinghua always wanted to be. Shang Qinghua in canon often mutters spiteful hate filled comments towards those who treat him bad but he doesn't often say it to anyone directly until the ascension. Because Shang Qinghua doesn't feel he can get away with it
Shen Qingqiu is also a conduit for the rage I'm sure Shang Qinghua has towards his half siblings. Those are ugly feelings that he can't express to the people in question. If you've been hurt and deprived and you see someone getting what you needed but never had, well it fills you with anger at the innocent party.
It's possible to swallow that rage down and recognise it's not the fault of the person recieving what you needed. But it's an ugly emotion that has to go somewhere. And I think all of Shang Qinghua's ugly feelings like that pre transmigration went to Shen Qingqiu
Shen Qingqiu can be spiteful and two faced and elegant and nasty in a way Shang Qinghua couldn't be. Which is why he had a complicated backstory
Mobei Jun: we know he's Shang Qinghua's ideal man. Both in what he's attracted to (whether he realises it or not when he wrote him) and what he wants to be
So what does that tell us?
It tells us Shang Qinghua wants to be strong and he wants to not feel
He wants to take the trauma of his childhood and close off from the pain he feels
He wants to be ice. He wants to be stoic and unbothered and strong enough that pain doesn't reach him
Now we know that Mobei Jun in SVSSS does have feelings he's just very bad at expressing them. But to Shang Qinghua he's endlessly cool and untouched and untroubled
We learn so little of Shang Qinghua directly but because he's author of the world and from ways he reacts to characters and situations we can infer so much
And he's so hurt and lonely and lacking in self worth
And yet the narrative doesn't get any kinder to him. Post transmigration he is bullied by the system and by his peers and by Mobei Jun and he's always fighting for survival
Because both lives have been about "smile, do what you're told, survive"
But his extras end with his ideal character protecting him, treating him kindly, and agreeing to make him noodles. And Shang Qinghua feels safe enough in that moment to be demanding and ask for what he wants!
And anyone who has been neglected and emotionally abused can tell you that asking for what you want is a big fucking deal
I will have been married 18 years this November and I still cannot tell my husband (who is great) what I would like for dinner half the time because in my head I am not allowed to ask for stuff (I'm working on it)
Shang Qinghua goes through so much shit (and we don't even learn his name from his first life)
But his happy ending is him finally asking for something for himself and getting what he asked for without complaint
And what he's asking for is what killed him
He's so interesting and I can't get over how much is there but hidden in the other characters
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Why "Unconventional" Daryl Matters
Daryl is my favorite male character on television. In fact, he was the first male role model I had after growing up with men who were always quick to anger, shouting at others, breaking things, and throwing tantrums. Norman's portrayal showed me that men have the ability to choose kindness, tenderness, and true love even if nobody taught them how when they were kids.
Daryl’s “unconventional” masculinity is what makes him so unique. He doesn’t make speeches or push to be the leader. Yes, Rick is a strong character, but I love Daryl because he isn’t Rick or any other male character on the show. Daryl is a trailblazer who breaks several stereotypes. Having spoken to so many other Caryl fans, I know Daryl's backstory and his devotion to Carol give them hope that they too can rise above their trauma.
Because of Norman and Daryl, so many fans feel more comfortable opening up about childhood or sexual abuse despite the stigma surrounding it. Daryl's representation is especially empowering to men who were abused or neglected for not conforming. He showed them what it means to be a kind, emotionally intelligent man. He did that. That's something I hope Norman is very proud of. The writers may have created a powerful emotional arc, but he is Daryl. No other actor could've captured Daryl's nurturing side that effortlessly – sometimes with just a simple look or touch or tone of voice – and balanced it with all of his epic moments. That's all him.
Most people understand that the purpose of my campaign over the past couple years was to demonstrate Melissa's and Carol's vitality to the show, but that's not all. I was advocating for Daryl's character integrity too. His fierce loyalty, vulnerability, and devotion to Carol all make him heroic in my eyes and they all go hand-in-hand, but when Daryl starts questioning where he belongs after spending only a short time with new characters and when his feelings get buried under layers of subtext, then my investment in him starts to feel misplaced, which hurts a lot because of the personal connection I've made with him. It makes Daryl's character growth from a lone wolf to a committed family man seem fruitless if he can just find a "surrogate" family somewhere else. Do I think the story will ultimately lead to Daryl making that choice? No, but my point is, it isn't clear why he could never choose anyone other than Carol and TF. And it needs to be. Norman said Daryl is someone who "wears his heart on his sleeve." That's the Daryl I root for. That's who I want to see more of. I miss him terribly.
Again, Daryl inspired a generation of young men to refuse the toxic male stereotype, and taught them how to choose kindness and how to love fiercely. Daryl’s love for Carol showed so many women that they deserve to be treated with love and respect by their partners. I'm excited to see more of Daryl who knows where he belongs and isn’t afraid to show his love for Carol. I want the trailblazer who stands up for who he is and doesn’t fall into toxic masculine traps – because that ain’t him.
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In the books Rand completely rejects his Aiel heritage. Jordan seemed to be going with telling the story of an adopted kid who decided only his adopted family mattered. But that's not the only way to tell that story so the show has the opportunity to do something different there if they want to. My preference would be not to have Rand reject his Aiel heritage but to refuse to abandon his Andoran heritage/Two Rivers upbringing. The Aiel canonically want him to become fully Aiel so for him to refuse to give up part of himself could be another way to frame it . They also resent the fact that Rand is only half Aiel and wasn't born in the Waste so they could do more of that imo
i'm trying to think of a useful response but my brain is too occupied by the sudden realization of the Bi Metaphor of rand being too aiel to fit in with wetlanders and too wetlander to fit in with aiel hahaha
anyway, from what i can remember, i don't know if i would say rand *completely* rejects his aiel heritage in the books (at least until the point when RJ himself shuffled the aiel off to the side in general because he wanted to play with the seanchan instead). i may be misremembering but i think rand DOES put in genuine effort to learn about aiel ways, but is just really bad at it and gets easily frustrated with trying to keep track of all the intricacies (which is completely understandable, especially since the aiel are making very little effort to adapt to HIS culture or meet him in the middle). and he IS curious about shaiel and janduin and is emotionally affected by hearing about them from the wise ones, even if he ultimately decides that tam and kari are his true parents (as he should! like you say, it's a great repudiation of the "blood family>adopted family" trope that is so prevalent in media and especially in fantasy where the Normie Adopted Family so often gets swept aside once the hero finds out about their Super-Special Secret Birth Family.)
and he knows that he needs to *be seen* adapting to aiel culture in some way in order to get the aiel's support, which is another interesting wrinkle in the whole situation, because his public behavior and his internal feelings are not necessarily aligned (i'm thinking of the alcair dal scene where i think all those lines about tam being his real father are just in his head as he's talking aloud to the aiel about being janduin's son). i'm not bothered by that sort of "i need to publicly buy into my aiel heritage but in my heart it's not who i am" attitude because i think it's pretty realistic for his situation. and maybe he starts shifting from "i just need to be seen doing this for political reasons" over to "i genuinely do respect aiel culture and want to learn about it, even if i'll never consider it MY culture" as he gets emotionally closer with aviendha and some of the other aiel.
but at the end of the day, while i like the aiel and find their culture interesting, i'm not nearly as invested in them as i get the sense many WOT fans are haha (see: me finding the glass columns sequence quite boring and being utterly bamboozled to discover that most readers list it as one of the best scenes in the series) and so i just don't feel very strongly about what route the show takes re: rand's relationship with aiel culture and his aiel heritage. and also probably have a fuzzy memory on a lot of the book details on this topic!
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I WANNA FEEL LOVE AGAIN
Part 1
Couple: Noah Sebastian x Fem!Reader
Content Warning: none. It's gonna be a slow burn, baby! Just a couple of bad words and some references to sexual intercorse. Should I add Matt to the warming just because it's part of this?
Taglist: @ada-clarence, @badalmondzzzz, my wifey @starsomens
Summary: Reader is Matt's sister and PR for Bad Omens. After a long relationship that ended quite bad, with her brother help, she decides to give herself a fresh new start in Los Angeles.
A/N: from now on, I'll post my notes at the end of the chapter to avoid spoilers!
As always this is just a product of fiction, nothing in this ff is real, my intention is to entertain myself and all of you.
Enjoy 🐕
I don't know if I count, but I'm trying my best.
This is not a story with a happy ending.
This is not one of those scenarios in which the grumpy old brother, after a significant amount of time, realises that his sister and his bestfriend are in love and the two of you can live happily ever after.
This is the real life, not an urban fairytale.
And there's a lot to unpack, emotionally.
First of all, you and Noah are not in love. You weren't aware of who he was before an hour ago. In your head you can ear in loop Eric, Eric, Eric, and it's fucking annoying that you actually had had the feeling you know him but you didn't recognised his throat tattoo after licking it. Or his nose. He has the most perfect nose you've ever seen, but nothing. It's not even an excuse that you haven't seen each other for three years because Matt shares videos from their gig on weekly basis, when on tour.
It's the fucking Clark Kent paradox, but instead of a pair of glasses, he got those long, perfect silk hair cut.
Losing the 25% of his charm, in your modest opinion.
But it doesn't matter.
Because when you met Eric, your first impression was that he seemed to be genuine, but shy maybe, in a good way a bit weird.
But genuine.
He is not genuine for the fuck sake! He lied on who he is and now you both have a problem.
Matt hasn't noticed yet, but only because he's too invested in the production of the music video to connect the dots. The way Noah stood in front of you, paralyzed, without talking, was loud enough for someone to notice.
You're sure about that.
After that stupid exchange of words you ran back inside the house telling everyone that it's too hot and you are not use yet to California's sunny day.
Dumbest excuse ever since is almost november, and Texas is warmer than here. But it worked so you can sit on the kitchen counter, and reflect about how much fucked up you are.
This is not even a story in which the main character is overreacting. You're Not. Matt has always hated every boy who laid and eye on you. From the very first boyfriend in mid school to a couple of classmates in highschool that just asked for your help with homeworks. Then, Shawn. He has never tollerated Shawn even if the rest of your family accepted him as a son. Matt never made up a scene in front of him or mistreated him in any way. But behind his back, he talked a lot shit, made you furious every time. He said that Shawn wasn't genuine enough (this adjective is starting to sound funny, at this point), caring enough, that he was drinking too much at your parents dinner table, that he looked too possessive.
In your modest opinion, your brother is terrible in judging others. For real. The issue on the table is always the same one; he is afraid you can get hurt. Matt can't physically stand the sight of you crying or being miserable.
Now, after this long mental digression, it's fair to say that he doesn't have to know. Absolutely. And you need Noah to be on the same page about that. You have to cut any contact with him that is not related to work. The date you have for friday is deleted.
It's sad because you really enjoyed having Eric around.
But he's not fucking Eric.
You don't have the chance to speak face to face with noah until after lunch. When the nerds move on Orie's room to give a first look at the unprocessed scenes and Jolly joined Folio in the pool, Noah is the one who actually comes looking for you.
You are on the sofa, petting Harper. He indulges just one second on the sight of you cuddling the adorable princess of the hous, before take a seat next to you. 《 Harp likes you.》
《 Well, she is not the only one. Isn't she?》
Noah release a long, loud sigh, while is cheeks get pink-ish. 《 You really are outspoken, are you?》. He gives a look at you, straight into your eyes. You are ready. You can feel how reticent he is right now, almost scared to say the wrong thing. 《 You are not gonna tell your brother about...》
《 About you eating me out in you car?》 It's your question, whispered between the two of you like the biggest secret in the world. 《 initially he won't believe us, but further investigations will follow; Maybe he will take the fingerprints from the back window. My hands were there while you were fucking me from behind. And he loves CSI.》
《 I'm serious. Are you going to tell him?》
And he is serious. You were joking, maybe because you feel a little embarrassed, maybe because your dad is right when he says that making fun about serious situations sometimes helps in facing them. But Noah on the other hand doesn't look amused. He looks like thinks you're mocking him.
So you hinale deeply, before looking back at him, leaving all your bullshit behind. And that's the moment in which you start to feel how tense the situation is. 《 I would rather chop my own foot than telling him I fuck with his best friend. He's gonna be furious. To me, but also to you. Do you have any deathwishies? Because I just got a fresh new start and I intend to survive the beginning of the week.》
Noah nods with a slow motion. He seems to have already evaluated any bad scenarios and keep it quiet is for the best of all of you. Especially Matt, who doesn't deserve to end up in jail. 《 So it's a secret between you and me now, Vanessa.》
《Don't you even try to use this card against me, Eric. 》
Noah brings his hands to his eyes. He looks even more concerned than you are. Matt once told you that Noah never had a real family, growing up. He was always on his own, so he formed a family with the friends he chose. Probably he is scared to disappoint Matt as much as you are.
《 Why you lie? Why you told me your name was Eric?》
With another sigh, Noah looked back at you. 《 I don't know. Sometime I ... fuck, you're going to have a bad first impression of me.》
《 Don't worry. I already had a bad first impression of you. 》
When he see you smile softly, he chuckles. It's pure tension right now and not the good one. He is living the horror of being caught with his hands in your honey jar. 《 ...When I meet a girl that sounds like troubles, I never bring her home and I give her a fake name.》
《 Did I sound like a troubles, to you?》
《 Yes because I knew I've already seen you.... but I couldn't recall were or when. And when you told me you had just moved in with your brother for a second I thought 'oh shit its y/n, her tits got bigger'. But then you lie as well and I believe I was in the safe.》
《 You didn't remember anything else but my breast size?》
It makes sense.
In some ways.
Half of fault is on both of you.
《 Sorry I lied》 , he says while rising from the sofa, ready to join his friends and check how the video is going 《 and sorry for... you know. 》
《 ah, don't say anything, we both enjoyed that part》 .
《 yeah, it was...》 Noah stays a couple of second in silence before biting both is lips. 《 We have to stop anyway. I cant loose Matt and he gave us a lecture about NOT fucking around with you, before you arrived.》
Now it's your time to sigh loudly. Yeah, you have seen that coming. But it's fine since you and Noah didn't planned it. You call it a casuality more than an incident.
You haven't big aspectation on Eric, anyway.
You feel like you've lost the capability of love long, after Shawn.
《 I agree. It's not gonna happen again》.
He smiles at you in relieve and you feel the same. 《 Can wait to work with you, than 》
《Otherwise》
He waves his hand before turning around and leave you in the living room. Harper is licking your hand so you start to pet her again, feeling better.
Matt will never know about your rendezvous.
You're washing the dishes after dinner, while Matt is picking up a movie. Even if you convinced yourself that you and Noah took the most resonable way, and also your conversation was short but clearifyng, you cant help yourself but feeling a bit down because you're not going to meet Eric anymore. And you know that Eric doesn't even exist. You will see Noah on a daily basis, and this will help a lot in moving on, but it's gonna be tough for the first week or two.
Because you and Noah are not in love, but you can feel the first syntomps of a beginning crush. Which is legit because Noah is funny and goofy and good-looking. More than that, he was nice to you and didn't force you in silence or nothing. You two have a conversation and reach an easy solution that makes everyone safe. Safe from Matt. After clearing the air, he also asked you for some advices because he never had a PR. It's his job usually and the two of you should work on that together. The prospective makes you nervous since you have no clue about the job itself, and Matt noticed. You know he did.
And you also know that he was waiting the vulnerable silence of your shared flat to talk about this with you.
《 What's wrong with Noah?》
You don't look back at him, rinsing the dishes from the soap. 《 What about Noah?》
《 He froze when he saw you this morning. And then you didn't look so happy about working with him》.
Matt and his way to be fucking direct.
You scroll your shoulders, epically good in lying. 《 I can't tell about him freezing in front of me. But I'm not looking forward to be his assistant and bring him his favorite brand of coffe.... or fold his underwares.》
《 That's not your job. He can make his own caffè and he won't let you fold any of his clothes. Trust me, that man on the edge of an OC diagnosis 》. You mumble something about being good in folding clothes while Matt approaches you, crossing his arm on his chest. 《 C'mon. Do I have to pull the big deal out of you kicking your ass?》
You're trapped because you two are too similar. You can read your brother like a book written for kids. Really dumb kids. And it's the same for him. You can't fool him too long.
《 Alright. I met a guy at the gym. He's name is Eric and he looked nice, but now I'm convinced that he's fake like a three dollar coin. Happy?》
You wait for the ocean of question that Matt is going to storm on you, but.... Nothing. He simply exhales before helping you, drying the dishes and the glasses with a cloat. You feel like you just turned twelve again and he was always around helping with the cores your mom gave you.
《 It's good that you're moving on fast. When I brought you here, I was afraid to see you again in the sane state you were in Texas. Close in your own room, drowing your bad feelings under the blankets. It's a good thing that you go to the gym and meet new people but be careful. People in LA are different from what you're used to. 》
You don't know what to say. You were aspecting Matt to start a lecture about rushing your new life and instead you got a boost. That's a progress.
《 Thanks for the advice》.
《 Just text me every time you're with him. And send me the position in real time so I can check.》
There he is! 《 You almost got me scared. I was wandering where my medieval-mind brother was. 》
《 Shut up!》
A soft laught leaves your mounth while he pours so water from the sink on you. And you oblige, doing it back on him. 《 I won't see Eric again, anyway.》
《 Who's Eric?》
《 Gym guy. He left.》
Matt finished drying the last fork before push you a little, playfully. 《 What did you say to make him run?》
《 Nothing! You asshole!》
The two of you reach the sofa, but apparently he is not done with the conversation. 《 Can you promise just two things?》
《 Alright, shoot》
《 In case this guy will be back and you won't be interested, just call Noah. He is enrolled to the same gym》.
You have to do your best to not laugh or betray yourself in any way. 《 Promise. What else?》
《 You are more than allowed to look for some happiness. You deserve to be loved by someone who is not an idiot as Shawn. Someone who sees the real you.》 You smile with some commotion to these beautiful words, reaching for his hand on the cushion in between you two. 《 But please never date anyone from the crew. No one wants drama while we're hitting the road.》
The smile froze on your lips without giving your brain the chance to process why you suddenly feel so .... disappointed.
《 y/n, pinkie promise?》
A bit reluctant, you grab his pinkie with yours, like you have done billions of time.
《 I promise》.
And you really hope you will be able to keep it.
It takes six days to meet again Noah at the gym. Matt helped you find a class about management and public relations, and day after day, you're learning how you can be useful for the band. Working on websites, taking care of the agenda, and defining schedules sounds scary, but you feel more confident day after day.
Noah is sitting outside his jujitsu class, his mitts next to him, and some bandage in his hand. The other one is busy scrolling the screen of his iPhone. You're reticent in bump into him, but just for a second. You know that if you start to avoid him, it will be a bad habit to lose. So you approach greeting him.
He looks surprised, but just for a couple of seconds, while he's buring the cellphone in his shorts' pocket. 《 How is yoga going?》
《 Fine, nothing noticeable》 , you take a seat next to him, smiling. 《 How jujitsu is going?》
《 Today, not so good》 he answers, showing you his brushed knuckles. Some blood on the right hand is almost dry. 《 I have to change my mitts. These are fucked.》
That's an amazing start of conversation for two people who had sex and then started to pretend that never happened in less than 24 hours.
《 Let me help you with that.》 With a nod, you indicate the bandages. He slowly gives the box to you, and after cleaning your hands with the sanitizer you have in your gym bag, you start to wrap the bandages around his hand gently.
《 How's school going? Matt said that you're taking it so seriously》. There is something in his voice that is illegible. Is he mocking you? Or maybe he is amused? You're focused on his hands to pay attention to his sminking face.
《 Well, I'm supposed to, right?》
《 Why? Why do you want to work with us? I mean... you can find a job as a piercer. I saw you in action and you're really good at it. 》
After fixing his left hand, you proceed to the other one, avoiding his gaze. 《 Do you want me to be honest?》
《 You can be honest, or you can be Vanessa 》.
A sigh escapes from your lips, uncontrolled. The audacity of this bitch. 《 Because I want the money. Because I want to spend a lot of time with my brother. Because I want to choose my job and leave the one my prick ex chose for me behind. Because I have nothing left to lose. I want to love my life again, waking up in the morning with a purpose.》
You have no idea why you're opening up to someone you barely know. But it is what it is. You can't have a fresh new start if you are not honest with yourself.
And when you look at Noah, you find respect in his gaze. 《 You just move in LA, and i'm not gonna lie to you: it's hard work. Are you sure you can take this?》
《 I'm used to fight any battle at my lowest》 it's your answer. The most honest one you can guarantee to him. 《 I'm ready to drag myself if it's necessary and only if it's forward. I need a hurricane to shake up my entire existence》.
《 Well well, you might have found the right one. Our new record could be a total disaster or grant us more than I can even imagine. You pick up the right train or, at least, you will enjoy every second of my downfall》
《 You're so drammatic, like every singer. 》
Noah giggles at your last affirmation before checking his hands. 《 thanks. You're already an amazing assistant. 》
《 I'm not your fucking secretary. 》
《 So who are you, y/n?》
A broken doll.
A girl that just wants to be love.
A woman covered in scars, who has a heart hidden in meters and meters of barber wire to prevent everyone from hurting it again.
《 A friend, Noah.》
And you can tell by his smile that it's the right answer he was waiting for. And this beautiful and sincere smile could be enough to put aside any crush you can develop in order to gain a true friend.
《 Lets grab a beer, then.》
A/N : I know that probably a lot of you are here for the smut, but I rethink this ff with a lot of realistic scenarios and the idea of writing a friends to lovers. It's my first attempt on this topic, and I'm thrilling to recieve any thought about it from you! I left an important hint for the future in the text by the way.
You can also send me inbox about my ff, about Bad Omens in general or headcanons! It's gonna be fun if you give me some credit ♡
I also added a song in the beginning that should be a sort of soundtrack for the chapter. I added it to the first chapter as well if you want to check!
Lastly, if you wish to be added to my tag list, comment here or send me a pm!
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pac: advice from the universe regarding the next month
i'm trying something new, a pick a card. take what resonates leave what doesn't - nothing is 100% for you because these aren't personalized so please no angry comments or dms about what i am saying not being a good fit for you or that you "don't claim" just keep scrolling if that is the case. be kind, self reflect, and have fun.
want a personal reading? click here to check out my reading options and prices!
pile one
you may be feeling like you are lacking or at a loss (you could fear loss as well). there may be something going on monetarily - perhaps you have work stress and fear job loss or something you have invested in is not panning out. try not to focus on what you lack or may lose, instead appreciate what you have in the moment - abundance comes from within. plus you may be overlooking those around you who want to help - do not internalize fears, allow others to help you if they are offering.
"thunder only happens when it's raining" is what i am hearing ("dreams" by fleetwood mac). after storms there is sunshine and sometimes a rainbow - hard times are temporary. adapt your perspective to have a more optimistic outlook - have hope and faith that things will get better. things that have happened in the past are not bound to repeat themselves - if you are healing and being optimistic you are bound to manifest better outcomes.
take swift actions to remain in control. you may get a lot of ideas and thoughts regarding your situation - confront and converse with others to tackle any issue(s) head on. trust all gut instincts to guide you through each step. don't worry about details, simply make a move. be bold and initiate action. you are likely to experience improved communication and clarity in your connections with others when doing so.
pile two
you should be aware of the person with a strong nuturing and dependable attitude - perhaps this person is you. evaluate the quality of the support you give and receive in your life. perhaps your are giving more than you are receiving, or receiving more than you are giving. make sure that you are being generous and appreciative in order to receive from the universe. nurture yourself as well as you nurture others as well. you attract what you put out into the universe oftentimes - so ensure that you are caring for yourself and your space. it's a great time to nurture yourself and the world around you.
you may not know it, but you are stronger than you think. you have everything you could possibly need at your fingertips - with intention and passion you can do anything. you're in your prime ("liquid smooth" by mitski) to manifest anything this month. take action - remember to create balance. never go to extremes.
celebrate yourself; you likely look around and and see people who are more fulfilled or successful than you. BUT reminder: we are all at different stages and on different tracks. you deserve to celebrate yourself and your wins. enjoy small moments with friend and/or family. be grateful for what you do have. feel secure in your overall wellbeing - you are on your way to more success (love, career, and/or personally).
pile three
know that you are your highest self - you know who you are at heart and can/should express yourself accordingly. you are a very emotionally aware of those around you as well as your own feelings - you could be initiating a new romance. be open to new and unexpected messages from those around you (something is coming your way). be sure that you remain playful and creative at this time - follow your intuition and create as you feel inspired. take in the small moments - there you may find inspiration for new things.
try to envision yourself above the situation you are in now. imagine being in control of your situation ("imagine" by john lennon - i feel like you are going through it compared to the other piles/cards) - you are guiding your situation in a hopeful way that is best for you. utilize your gift of manifestation to the fullest to guide you through change. heal and be hopeful of your wonderful future.
you should embrace your alone time - explore your inner realm and figure out who you are and what you want/need. this is a great time to do shadow work. spend alone time to heal and recharge - you will know when it is time to go out and be social again. you are seeking your inner truth and that takes time and space - it is okay to want alone time. mediate, go for a walk, connect with the world around you.
#pick a card#pick a picture#pick a pile#tarot#tarotcommunity#tarot reading#free tarot#intuition#intuitive
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Gambit, Mental Health & Trauma
(Prefacing this with this is my interpretation and analysis of Gambit as a character, past and current events. I've been a fan of roguegambit for over a decade- I love them both so much!!!!!)
Gambit is a character who has canonically experienced a lot of trauma- being abandoned by his parents, growing up on the streets, sold into slavery as a child, his first marriage failing, being exiled from his hometown, etc. (I could honestly go on for days.)
Yet, this is largely ignored by comic writers. In situations where his consent is violated, for example, it's brushed off as a silly haha, and he has no reaction to it whatsoever.
I think the reason his trauma is so unexplored is firstly, because he's a man, and secondly, a lot of these events happened in solo's written by men. Examples of this are Gambit (1999), when he was sold into slavery and Etienne died, as well as the Foxx storyline in X-Men (2004)- both were written by men.
Even in Astonishing X-Men (2017), after the Foxx storyline, Mystique claims -in a throwaway line- to have slept with Gambit presenting as twin sisters. His reaction is, "Wait, what? How?" and that's it. No one else in the group reacts, and it's never acknowledged again.
Personally, if I found out that the mother of my (ex-)partner, who sexually harassed me over an extended period of time in the past, had gone on to violate my consent in such a manner, I would be upset. To say the least.
It's only in more recent years that conversations about men's mental health and consent have begun to happen, so it's not much of a surprise to me (sadly) that events were ignored or brushed over in the past.
The reason for my pointing all of this out is in response to his characterisation in Rogue and Gambit (2023).
Thus far, rather than dealing with his trauma, Gambit has ignored it.
RG23 is the point where everything has caught up with him, and he doesn't know how to cope. I can understand why it might seem like he's suddenly being written as a completely different person- for a very emotionally-driven person, somehow, his trauma has never negatively affected him in the past.
However, to understand RG23, we need to revisit Knights of X (2022)- where Gambit's depression came to the forefront. In issue 1, we see Rogue has left a note stating, "Shug- Working late. Don't wait up - Cher". We see he's unhappy about this, it's not the first time, and it's what leads him to join KOX and travel to the otherworld. He's lonely.
This panel from issue 2 tells us everything we need to know about Gambit's headspace at that point in time. He misses Rogue, he doesn't believe she misses him, and he doesn't believe she loves him anymore.
Gambit has always struck me as the kind of person who desperately wants to be loved, but does not believe he is worth loving. At the beginning of his relationship with Rogue, he wanted her to love him, but he couldn't let himself emotionally invest in her.
This could be attributed to a whole number of things, but I think it all comes down to low self-worth. We know Gambit doesn't think of himself as a good person, which leads to him willfully making bad decisions at times (self-destructive behaviour). We also know that when he loves, he loves with everything he has and more.
After his exile from New Orleans, Gambit chose to abandon Bella Donna instead of bringing her with him. I think, from his perspective, he'd done irrevocable damage to the peace between their families, not to mention killing her brother. He couldn't allow her to sacrifice everything just to be with him, so he left her. Why? Because he didn't believe he deserved her love and dedication.
I'm certain this is a mindset Gambit took to all of his relationships going forward. Flirting, flings, and one night stands are an easy way to feel important for a minute without the risk of someone truly knowing him and deciding he isn't worth their time.
I think this is why it took him so long to admit to Rogue (and himself) that he was in love with her. I think this is also why we've seen him completely give up on communicating with her between KOX and RG23.
If Gambit starts a conversation with Rogue about their relationship, he's opening himself up to rejection. We know from RG23 issue 2's Rogue interview that she would never reject him (from her perspective their marriage is fine), but he doesn't know that. To hear the one person he loves most in the world outright say she doesn't love him anymore... It would break him completely. So, Gambit avoids the conversation.
In KOX issue 3, Gambit essentially killed himself to save his team.
Now, consider his mindset: he's in the Otherworld because he thinks Rogue doesn't love him anymore.
I'm not saying that directly led to him killing himself- as I said, he did so to save his team. However, I think it's safe to say if his mental health was in a better place, he wouldn't have made such a decision, let alone have gone to the Otherworld to begin with.
This page from KOX issue 5 highlights his feelings for Rogue. She's his heart. His reason to live. Compare her statue to all of his:
Rogue's statue is surrounded by light. There's no way anyone could miss seeing it versus his statues, representing multiple versions of himself- all of them are shrouded in darkness, no visible details.
Not only does Gambit not want people to see him, he wants them to look at Rogue. To Gambit, Rogue is the best part of him.
I'm not gonna pretend that's a healthy mindset. If anything, it further emphasises to me his low self-worth.
I want to point out this page for several reasons.
Firstly, it could be said that Gambit didn't want to be saved, and that's why his Death persona manifested to kill his team. He wanted to stay dead.
Secondly, Death is the very very worst part of him, yet he says, "You ain't really changed if you ain't looked in the mirror and seen the worst parts a' yo'self. I am Death, mes amis." He's essentially telling them that this terrible, awful person is who he's always been deep inside. We know this isn't true, but this is what Gambit believes.
Thirdly, as mentioned earlier, when Gambit slips into that belief of "I'm a horrible person", he often makes bad decisions. In RG23 issue 2 (set after KOX), we see him tie an innocent civilian's hand to a gas stove, turn it on and then set it on fire. Gambit knows this is a horrible thing to do, but he's in such a horrible mental state that he doesn't think he's above this behaviour. I will come back to this point.
Gambit asks how anyone new is coming to the Otherworld because the gate between Krakoa and the Otherworld was closed, and Betsy could only take ten of them. To partake on such a dangerous mission, Gambit chose to risk leaving everything behind without knowing if he'd even make it back alive.
In a sense, he abandoned Rogue in a similar way to abandoning Bella Donna. He went somewhere neither of them could reach him. Or supposedly couldn't.
Rogue was first to greet him after his revival. Gambit couldn't believe this because a) he thought he was dead, and b) why would Rogue, who is too busy for him, be the first to see him after his resurrection?
It's easy to think that this moment resolved Gambit's worries that Rogue didn't love him, and that, going forward, their problems were fixed, but as RG23 shows, it didn't. Rogue showing up for him once isn't enough to fix their current issues because the problem lies deeper than Rogue's absence.
At a superficial level, it's easy to blame her for Gambit's mental state, but I believe this depression he's fallen into has been a long time coming. Decades of unprocessed trauma, insecurity and self-destructive behaviour- literally dying and coming back to life, have culminated in the Gambit we see in RG23. To be honest, you have to be in a very very dark place to kill yourself, self-sacrifice or otherwise.
Issue 1 of All New X-Factor (2014) shows Gambit is no stranger to drinking and barfights. The difference is his mindset. We know he can win a fight against multiple people- we've seen that happen many times. So why, in RG23 issue 1, was he suddenly unable to block a punch, let alone hold himself upright?
Because he didn't want to win.
When Rogue arrives to rescue him, we learn multiple things. It's not the first time he's disappeared somewhere without telling her; it's not the first time she's found him so drunk he's incapacitated; it's not the first time she's had to save him from a fight he's not winning.
What this tells me is that Gambit is purposefully putting himself in dangerous situations as a form of self-harm. He doesn't tell Rogue where he's going because he doesn't want her to save him. He drinks to the point he can barely stand to make sure there's no way he can win a fight, and then he starts a fight to get the shit kicked out of him.
It almost seems like, in some sense, he still wants to die, but he can't kill himself. Not while he remains in limbo with Rogue.
It works both ways- if he never asks Rogue how she feels, he never finds out that he's right and that she doesn't love him. He also never finds out he's wrong and that she does love him.
It's important to add here, that Rogue is in a very difficult position.
RG23 issue 1: we can see Gambit actively shutting Rogue out. He calls it a "misunderstanding" and his "business". Despite the fact that they're married, Gambit is basically telling Rogue to stay out of it.
Again, he's shutting her out, making light of such a dangerous situation and then outright ignoring her. In fact, Gambit's completely disregarding her feelings. We can see Rogue is exhausted. It's hard to care about someone who doesn't care about themselves.
And Rogue does care. A lot. Every time Gambit goes missing she goes out to find him, saves him and then brings him home to take care of him.
But she can't help him if he won't let her.
When someone you love hurts themselves, it hurts you too, and Gambit is indirectly hurting Rogue, but he refuses to see that because he's decided that she doesn't care. In his spiral of self-destruction, he's completely shut down communication between them.
Asking for help is never easy to do, and we know he thinks she's too busy for him. He doesn't want to burden her with his issues.
Furthermore, he doesn't want to face his issues and resolve them.
In issue 2 of RG23, after losing their powers, Rogue is freed from the burden of having to consciously control them at all times, and we see them share a moment of physical intimacy.
I find his use of "tête-à-tête" here (French for "a private conversation") ironic because we all know they weren't talking.
Returning to what I said earlier about Gambit and flings- physical intimacy is an easy way to briefly fill the void of what he's missing in emotional intimacy.
I don't believe he suddenly views his relationship with Rogue as something akin to a fling. I think the opposite.
Gambit invests in their relationship physically but not emotionally because to him, that's the safest way he can connect with Rogue right now. Touch is his love language, and when he can't find the words to speak, physical intimacy is the best he can do.
Rogue and Gambit (2018) showed us that, back then, Rogue was the one struggling to communicate her feelings, and Gambit was always very open with her about where he stood, so why the role reversal?
We can see Rogue trying to communicate, but Gambit shuts her down, pushing her away.
By doing this and holding onto the idea that Rogue doesn't love or care about him anymore, Gambit is sub-consciously trying to ruin their relationship.
Given how much he loves Rogue and wants to be with her, this tells me he's still in a very dark headspace.
Going back to the statues being parts of himself he doesn't want anyone to see, as well as becoming Death once more, and finally confessing his core belief- that he can't change, he will always be a terrible person: Gambit's trapped himself in his own insecurity.
If he opens up to Rogue, he risks her seeing him for who he truly believes he is. What comes with that? Rejection.
Here, we see Gambit drinking once again. Rogue also mentions how, on one occasion, he argued with a sommelier over wine. In both issue 1 and 2 Gambit's use of alcohol has been highlighted in a negative light. It's an unhealthy coping mechanism.
Also, it's easy to look at this scene and think Rogue is the one who can't let loose and lighten up, but I think what's actually happening is Gambit is ignoring her feelings, as he did in issue 1. She has a drink and two glasses next to her on the table, so it's not as if they haven't already spent a considerable amount of time having fun there.
When Rogue says they should leave, Gambit's more interested in continuing his escapism- until Black Panther arrives, and he starts another drunken fight he can't win. A pattern has been established.
"He'll save her. He's a hero." is a very telling line that reveals why Gambit did what he did- because he's not a hero, and he knew the woman would be saved.
To reiterate, Gambit believes he is a terrible person who is not above doing terrible things. He does not change: he will always be who he was as Death. The worst of the worst.
By risking an innocent woman's life to save himself (and Rogue), he only furthers this belief.
We see here that Gambit looked back to check if Black Panther did indeed save the woman he endangered. Without looking at Rogue and speaking quietly (evidenced by the smaller writing and bubble), he says to himself, "He saved her." Because Gambit isn't the terrible person he thinks himself to be- he couldn't leave without knowing the woman was safe.
This is how we, the reader, know that Gambit hasn't suddenly changed and become a terrible person. He's struggling with his mental health and sense of identity after a lifetime of trauma.
Honestly, there are so many more traumatic events I could talk about.
There's a long list of people Gambit's lost- as mentioned before, in his 1999 solo, it was shown he was partly responsible for the death of his cousin, Etienne.
In X-Men (1991), we found out that, after a failed heist, Gambit was forced by Sabretooth to pick between saving his brother and saving Genevieve. He chose his brother, and she was killed.
In his 2012 solo, Gambit's love interest, Joelle, killed herself in front of him. In his 2022 solo, he failed to save his love interest, Marissa, and as a result, she became visibly disfigured.
It goes without saying events like the Morlock Massacre would've had a huge impact on his mental health and sense of self-worth too.
If you've read all of the above, you might be wondering why only now are we getting to see the repercussions of all this? Why does all this trauma suddenly matter?
Rogue and Gambit (2018) opened the doorway for exploring their issues as a couple. Mr and Mrs X (2018) gave Rogue an opportunity to revisit her trauma (and finally conquer her powers in the process). Now, I think it's Gambit's turn. At this point, he's surpassed rock bottom, and the only way up is finally confronting these issues.
Will everything I've mentioned here be explored in Rogue and Gambit (2023)? I doubt it. It's very plot-driven and only five issues long.
However, I do think the first step for him is resolving his communication issues with Rogue, which I'm certain will happen in RG23. Afterwards, it wouldn't surprise me if we see him continue to fight his own demons in future issues until he finds his closure.
IN CONCLUSION: I understand the frustration with Gambit's characterisation and why it may seem like he's suddenly become an entirely different person. I don't expect everyone to agree with everything I've said!!
This is my personal interpretation of everything- I'm not trying to blame the current situation entirely on Gambit and act like Rogue can't make a bit more effort.
Their issues are a lot more complicated than simply Rogue not spending enough time with him.
I look forward to seeing this develop further in RG23 :D
tl;dr in my opinion his characterisation so far in Rogue and Gambit (2023) makes sense following the ideas established in Knights of X (2022): Gambit is depressed, has a very low self-esteem, and doesn’t believe Rogue loves him anymore
#i hope this all makes sense my brain turned to mush towards the end#rogue#gambit#analysis#knights of x#rogue and gambit 2023#remy lebeau#anna marie lebeau#romy#roguegambit
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Yesterday episode with Gemini and Lunar 🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠ho boy on one hand I agree with alot about what Gemini said about Lunar being he doesn't try to solve his problem of trama and out right avoids trying to get help for so long now the consequences of that has now put him in danger because I have a very good feeling Taurus is pretty muder but I do feel Gemini lack of truly understanding emotions also adds to the problem like saying he a child but screaming and a child will somehow fix it but after everything that happens Gemini WILL STILL try and defend Lunar to the best of their ability and I really appreciate that about them
Honestly yeah.
Gemini feels completely betrayed, and feels as if they failed Lunar.
Gemini has actually repeated a lot of analysis and words that I have said about Lunar in the public server, which could be a coincidence, but I like to think that the actors saw what I said and yoinked it for later.
Gemini is THIS upset because they are emotionally attached to Lunar. Right now, they feel like that's a mistake.
Who knows if Lunar will actually listen and take what Gemini says to heart.
Because Lunar is really childish and a complete hypocrite of a character. Earth and Lunar were having a conversation moments before on how Lunar can approach this.
Moon even told Lunar that Eclipse might approach and antagonize him and he had to be ready for that.
Lunar held a grudge over Moon for weeks because he said "Trust your family"
What does he do?
Not trust Earth. At all. And gives into his emotions and listen to Eclipse who was bullying him.
He should have shocked Eclipse to show him his place. Maybe punched him to get some feelings out....... But continuously electrocuting him until he was nothing but ash?
Honestly... in the latest TSAMS episode, Moon does exactly what Lunar should have done to work on his issues.
NewMoon isn't letting Eclipse occupy any of his time or head space cus it's not helping him. And I think Moon feels a relief that this is the big bad Eclipse he built in his head in the one year he's been alive.
Lunar thought he would be "Free" if he killed Eclipse, not true, he had to learn how to be free in the mental sense, in just... not letting Eclipse rule over his mind anymore.
It's a tragic case of Lunar had the cards stacked in his favor with people who would help and protect him, but refused them at every oppertunity.
Gemini's call out of Lunar was well deserved, and they're doing it, because they know they are too deeply emotionally invested in Lunar and care about him.
They feel hurt, and betrayed by his actions. Which they wouldn't, if they "don't feel anything" like Lunar claimed.
And judging by how Lunar reacted after they left... Who knows if he can even process or understand what Gemini tried to tell him.
Lunar just can't cope. He can't cope with anything. He has to be the victim forever cause that's all he wants to be. Am I victim blaming Lunar? Absolutely not. But he is not the only one who suffered under Eclipse. Yet he always acts like he did. With a "Oh I'm sorry, did you blow up?"
He parades his trauma like a badge of honor. That he has trauma. That he's the most traumatized so only his feelings mater above anything else that's logical or anyone else's feelings.
People compare what Lunar did to what Sun did. And while I do think Sun can offer Lunar comfort, there is a few things missing here.
Sun killed Bloodmoon because he was antagonized, but he was also thinking of self-defense. The protection of himself and his family.
Lunar.... Was not thinking about that.
Ironic that Eclipse joked he wasn't Bloodmoon and died in a very similar mater.
Eclipse taunted Lunar. But Eclipse had a chip that prevented him from hurting anyone in the family. Lunar was told this and Earth knew this.
Lunar killed Eclipse, not out of a desire to protect himself, or his family. He killed Eclipse in revenge, in hatred. In no single instant did he think how his actions would affect Earth (WHO WAS RIGHT THERE AND WAS IGNORED AND PROBABLY FEELS HORRIBLE LIKE SHE FAILED LUNAR AND THIS IS HER FAULT THIS HAPPENED.)
Lunar didn't think about Earth, Sun, Moon, Solar. He thought of NO ONE but himself and his own satisfaction.
That's the difference.
That's what makes him a child.
And that's why he needs help.
And that's why Gemini is so furious.
And I swear to god I hope Lunar can actually understand what Gemini said to him... otherwise things will just get way harder for Lunar.
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