#I'm a strikingly un-presentable girl in a lot of ways though. I tend to say whatever comes into my mind (not always a good thing lol :')) | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

fortes-fortuna-iogurtum · 1 year

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I'm not judging her involvement in the crime based on this, but I do have to say that Arabella is exactly the kind of girl who has always made me most uncomfortable. so I can certainly relate with Eliza in that. :')

#she's so... bubbly and sweet and feminine and smiling and perfectly-presented and she gives the perfect PR Rep responses to everything #girls like this make me feel so incredibly awkward and uncomfortable. they're so perfectly... presented.#and that's what it is that gets me about them--everything about them feels like a /presentation/. there's no authenticity.#I'm a strikingly un-presentable girl in a lot of ways though. I tend to say whatever comes into my mind (not always a good thing lol :'))#and I don't put a lot of care into how I look or the impression I give people at first glance #which I'm sure confuses and bothers a lot of people #but I would rather be real and authentic and without frills or complications or perfect poise and posture #and be a bit off-putting and Too Much sometimes #than for everyone to feel like I'm holding them at arm's length and they never know how I truly feel about them #gurt says stuff #miss scarlet and the duke #(once again I am saying that I think Eliza should be neurodivergent... like. on purpose-ly so. not just come off that way sometimes.)#(coming back to this to add that these are the kinds of girls a lot of colleges and faith organizations I've looked at have held up #as their star members #and every time I see that I can't help but want to draw back from those organizations #because I can never ever /be/ that and what's more--I don't WANT to be that #and so I get the distinct impression that if these are the types of girls these organizations want everyone to see #they certainly won't want me to join)

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