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#I’m just posting this because I am bored
madzandmore · 3 days
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Hii bbys,
First I just want to say thank you. Thank you for everything that you have done for me and thank you for supporting me through these last few months. Thank you getting me to 350 followers, I appreciate you guys so much words can’t explain it.
My time on tumblr has been amazing and I loved every second of it. I’ve made so many friends over the months including my number one bb @itsmealaiah
I’ve made so much content over these months on Wattpad and Tumblr and I think my time has come.
To be honest I never expected this to blow up and for me to get popular but I guess it did. I just started this for fun and because I was bored and had nothing to do.
I was really free over school holidays but now that school is almost ending and I have a ton of assignments and work, I can’t keep up.
Tumblr has also changed a little for me. Not many people are posting and even the same for Wattpad. Ever since my book on Wattpad got taken down I lost motivation.
Tumblr is not the same as it was a couple months ago. My likes have been down and I just don’t have time anymore. I’m worn out and I need a big break from writing.
I am debating whether or not to delete all my posts but I will still be active, just not posting.
Again, I love, appreciate, and thank all my fans for this wonderful period of my life. But I think for now I’m done. Who knows, maybe I might come back…
So, for the last time…
BYE BBYS<3
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darlindeer · 1 day
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A Good Place III
tags:fem!reader, takes place post-canon, reader is/was chronically online, reader is actually a bad person, cursing, Lucifer lowkey is having a mid-life crisis (again), Lucifer has very strong feelings about sinners, I am afraid that reader is a girlblogger, reader has daddy issues, Vaping (don't do it, is not worth it). words: 2.7k a/n: HI :D sooooo I really like this chapter, and I hope that you do too :D its a short one buuuut yeah :D ALSO I am starting a taglist soooo if you wanna be tagged do let me know ^^
part i, part ii, part iii
Do all therapists go to heaven? 
Well surely not if they are like creeps or like… malpractice? Yeah… that sounds right? 
Either way, you were sure that listening to Lucifer talk about himself and his life is definitely winning you some good person points or whatever it is they measure “goodness” by. Sure, you were doing it out of the kindness of your heart as Charlie likes to put it as but… its gotta be helping with redemption right?
“And.. uh.. Oh” He trailed off, his eyes falling on you, seeing how your half lidded eyes and sleepy look in your face “you should probably get to bed, sorry, I didn’t mean to bored you” 
“No, no… is just… your voice is soothing I guess” You half lied sitting up straight 
“Oh…” He blushed and looked away “so… uh… how are you doing?” He asked awkwardly 
“Huh?” 
“Well, after I ran out of thing to ask you I just sorta started talking about myself and you just sit there and listen” He was looking away still. He never really looked at you for longer than a couple of seconds, at least when he had your attention, sometimes during the day you’d feel his eyes burning into the side or back of your head until you turned around and he would quickly look away. But like with most things you would simply ignore it, at least you knew that he wasn’t staring because he wanted you to drop dead, like he did with Alastor. 
“Oh, uh… well… I guess I’m fine?” You shrugged “I don’t know, I… I like being around here, but it just feels like I’m stuck… I guess?” You confessed quietly as you brought your knees up to your chest, as if you were protecting yourself from the little vulnerability you let out “like I don’t fit” You mumbled even quieter than before. 
You weren’t lying to him, not like when Charlie asks and you tell her you are great because you don’t want her to worry. You felt alone still, almost two months in the hotel and you still felt out of place. 
Lucifer sucked in air through his teeth, letting out an awkward hissing sound. He really wasn’t expecting that to be your answer, you always seemed so confident and smiley throughout the day, he figured your quiet demeanor during your talks was just because you were tired not because you were sad. He was wrecking his brain to find something to say but he looked over at you when he heard you let out a giggle 
“Y’know I’m terrible at comforting people too” You said with a small smile “I think most of the time I make that exact sound, one time I just said “bummer” when a friend told me her mom died” You giggled again, before burying your head into your knees. 
“That’s horrible” He gasped looking at you, seeing how your hands gripped the sides of your legs slightly tighter and your tail, wrapped around and laid over your feet. “Sorry…” 
“I just don’t know how to… feelings properly” You groan, your voice slightly muffled 
“Hey, I’ll drink to that” He said with a small chuckle, slumping back on the couch, now staring at the wall, you didn’t say anything back. The silences between you didn’t feel awkward anymore, nor empty to Lucifer, they just were. Part of whatever this is that you are doing.
“Don’t tell Charlie…” You mumbled looking up and turning your head to him 
“Huh? Tell her what?” 
“That I said that I feel like I don’t fit…” you sighed and closed your eyes “please… I know that I'm asking you to lie to your daughter but-” 
“I won’t” He interrupted you, you opened your eyes, and for once he didn’t look away as soon as you did, but it felt weird, he was looking at you with understanding and something else… it felt weird, so this time you looked away 
“Thanks” You sighed, staring at the wall, the room was illuminated by the tv, it was on but on mute, set on some random channel, it casted a blue-ish light that would ever so often change depending on the scene of the show that was on, you found it a little odd how the entire room changed because of the light, it made the overwhelming amounts of red seem bearable, but who cares, you certainly don’t you are just looking for something to distract you from the weight that lucifer’s look was starting to weigh on you. To think that a few minutes ago you were wondering why he never looked at you for longer than 5 seconds, now you just want him to look away.
And for the first time, the silence seemed unbearable to you, you never minded before, hell! You could even say that you liked it, a break, a moment to breathe, to settle before moving onto whatever next topic Lucifer wanted to talk about. Now it just felt like you were drowning, soon you’ll be gasping for air and reaching for whatever you could get a hold of to escape the crushing weight of it. 
You let go of your legs, stretching them out and took a deep breath. 
“I think I am going to go to bed” You said standing up from the sofa, “goodnight” You flashed him a small smile before walking away, giving him a small wave 
“Night…” he mumbled waving back 
・༓☾  ☽༓・ 
Lucifer knew he hadn’t really made a “personal” connection with you, you were… friends… of sorts. You’d talk and listen to him, and he did the same, but there was something different about it, like a weird shame… that was part of the reason he had asked you to keep your conversations a secret, but he wasn’t quite sure why he felt this weird encapsulation shame whenever he was around you. Even though you two would only speak during nighttime, whenever he had the time to “spare you” a glance during the day, he couldn’t help but stare until you turned to look at him, granted you always looked slightly annoyed when you turned which only made him turn his gaze away. That only led him to believe that you felt this same weird feeling he had about this “relationship”. 
Sure, during your talks you were nice, you smiled and looked at him when he spoke, you gave him undivided attention, and he knew that you did too because there had been a few times you recalled things he had said, little throw away things that he would not have remembered, but you did, you’d tilt your head to the side, your ears turning outwards a little, your eyebrows knitting together in slight confusion before you asked about the small inconsistency on the story he was telling you, it wasn’t like he was lying, he wouldn’t lie, he would just misspeak, but you noticed. 
And that attention to detail wasn’t something exclusive to him, he noticed how you would randomly recall in the same way about the other residents, same expression, same tilt of your head as you asked them about the smallest of details or inconsistencies in their stories, Alastor specifically seemed to detest this about you. 
Maybe it was the hypocrisy he was performing, so adamantly disliking sinners and actively avoiding them publicly, even slightly resisting his darling daughter’s request for him to try, only for him to seek you out and practically beg you to talk to him. There was definitely… ways… for him to learn about the things you told him about, but maybe it was because you were a sinner that he wanted to hear it from you, someone that had actually experienced it, not just read it off a book or recall old old memories. 
Any way, you were a plague, there was no other way he could describe it. You had infested his mind, everything made him think of you. And it didn’t help that he literally would see you everywhere since he had been staying at the hotel to help Charlie contact heaven again. He could hide away in his studio/room for most of the day, but if he wanted to eat, or have some down time, chances were that he would see you, even if it was only a glimpse of you, your image would be plastered all over his mind. He could make a chart of every outfit you had worn this week. 
“Dad…Dad?” Charlie waved her hand in front of Lucifer’s face until he reacted and looked her way again since it seemed he was staring at the floor before “did you listen to anything I said?...” 
“Uh no, yeah totally” He said confidently looking up at his daughter with an awkward smile “but you could repeat it… just to confirm I got all of it”
“Right… so both Angel and Y/N are out today and I know we should focus on getting sinners into heaven but I think we should brainstorm some advertising! To get more sinners in here!...” Charlie continued to ramble on about one of her ideas, going full on the theatrics. 
“So where oh… where did Y/N go?” He asked after Charlie finished, looking at his nails as if to seem uninterested in the question he asked. 
“Uh, she said she had something to do, didn’t give much information, kinda just said be back later” Charlie said hand on her face as she thought back to this morning “and Angel had to work so, it’s a day off for them today at the hotel at least” 
“Right right, Andy is at work and Y/N is just out?” He hummed, still trying to look uninterested 
“Yes… ANGEL is at work and Y/N is somewhere, I think she said something about a sale, uh a five finger discount, so like 50% off probably!” Charlie said in a hopeful tone and then Lucifer tried to explain that you were probably shoplifting without crushing all her hopes. 
・༓☾  ☽༓・ 
You waltzed into the hotel near 3am, several bags hanging in your arms, holding your phone in one hand as the other held up a pink vape up to your lips, the little light at the bottom and the unbelievably bright screen of your phone, lighting up the mostly dark room. 
The only thing that could be heard was the clacking of your boots as you walk. You exhaled the smoke as you started walking up the stairs, using the light of your phone as a guide.
When you finally got to your room you found no other than lucifer, kinda just pacing in front of your door 
“Oh… hey” you said walking to the door and opening, he was wearing pajamas, like an actual two set pajamas, light blue with little duckies all over “you… uh been waiting long?” 
“You were out all day, uh andy got here before you” he said looking as you walked in, standing at your doorway 
“And you were worried?” you asked looking at him “are you just gonna stand there?... who's andy?”
“Y’know tall, spider fella” He raised his hand as far up as he could
“Oh, Angel” you said and nodded, taking out the several boxes from the bags “so, you were worried?” You asked in a teasing tone, your tail wagging slowly and low 
“Well you haven’t been in hell for long and those sinners out there… they are…” he followed with a long strained groan “t-they are violent and… and depraved-” 
“I just went shopping” You interrupted and shrugged “so like, I’ve been posting like a bunch of stuff on sinstagram and tiktok and like I’ve gotten a BUNCH of followers and like a couple stores were like, “come take a bunch of our stuff for free and just post a video or post a picture at the store” and well I love free stuff so I went and then after they were like “hey! Lets go to the club!” and my mom always told me to never deny a free drink or free anything so I went!” You explained taking out a pair of long boots “can you like, come in, its bugging me that you are at the door, I have… a poof you can sink into” 
“Oh yea yea, suuuuure, just come into your room, okay” He said quietly actually stepping in 
“Close the door behind you please” You pointed at it and he closed it, before just standing there awkwardly making you giggle a little “you can relax sire, is not like I have my panties on the floor” you giggled before looking around just to make sure “yeah no panties on the floor” 
“Haha sire, ha!” He chuckled to “himself”, he can’t really recall a moment where you had addressed him properly… or like at all… now that he is thinking about it you haven’t even said his name, not that he can remember. And it made his chest tight, he never has been fond of the tittle’s, tho he always wants to be addressed with respect. 
“I heard that” You said in a sing-songy tone “you can sit on the poof or my bed or… the floor, my rug is pretty soft” You pointed around “if you want to stay… you seem… kinda wiged out” 
“No is just… y'know your room, is a personal thing… and we… are like…. Not like that” He mumbled 
“Right… uh… right” You mumbled looking at the clothes in your bed. All of the sudden you felt as awkward as he did now, and when you feel awkward you feel vulnerable and that puts your defenses down, the delicately constructed walls you had built up on uneven ground, cracking at the first disturbance “y’know I… uh, I know it's you who normally asks the questions but…”
“Yeah?” 
You cleared your throat still not looking his way gripping the garment on your hands “I just… I don’t get it… why me?” 
“Why you what?” he questioned, head tilting to the side slightly 
“Why ask me? I just… everyone else in this hotel had far more interesting lives than I did and I just… why?” 
“Its because… well they have been dead for so long and you are the freshest” He shrugged, not really getting why you are asking it seemed like an obvious reason why he choose you 
“No. because… no, like.. I think I am also the youngest, I lived 24 years only, I, I… I barely experienced anything, and I’m also like… Like I barely did anything to get into hell, I mean, lie, steal, scam, I’m pretty sure that a visit to any catholic church would have saved me from all of this-” You continued your ramble, now moving around your room, 
You were sort of right, yes, a visit to any church would have definitely saved you, but you shouldn’t have gone to heaven, no, he would have never met you otherwise, and although he can’t fully admit it, he enjoys you, heaven doesn’t deserve you, they couldn’t appreciate you, with their stupid strict rules. You were right, you were barely a sinner, maybe that was why he didn’t mind you as much as the others 
“I mean all I was… was a hedonistic party girl that stole wallets and and!-” 
“Well, maybe that’s why” Lucifer shrugged “you are not like the rest of them, you aren’t violent or sick or depraved-”
 “maybe a little depraved” you whispered 
“And that’s why I like talking to you, you don’t have some sort of sick twisted version of earth in your mind, you didn’t see a pond with duck and think “that’s a perfect place to dump a body”, you saw calming place, you saw earth for what it was, I like that”
You stayed quiet, glancing at him, he was still standing by the door, and you were in the middle of the room, he was looking at you, with almost a sad look, like pity but different, he wasn't looking away or just past you. 
“You should go to bed” He gave you a closed eye smile before turning around and opening the door “Charlie has a big day planned for tomorrow so you should definitely get some rest, good night” 
“Good night” You said softly watching as he left, closing the door behind him
‧͙⁺˚*・༓☾ ☽༓・*˚⁺‧͙
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@boogiemansbitch
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cavillscurls · 3 days
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i’m really, really sorry for the lack of updates.
tw: mental health and general wallowing
i wanted to get this next chapter of dnd prior to leaving for my vacation tomorrow, but it’s looking like a slim chance. i won’t bore you with the sob story of my life, but these last few months have been… hard. even when i have free time, i’m spending most of it rotting (for lack of a better term lmao) because i’m so… exhausted. and the type of exhaustion that’s linked more so to being depressed than actually needing more sleep, though i’m sure the latter wouldn’t hurt.
i know i should be incredibly grateful to be where i am post graduation. i have no student debt. i have a stable enough day job. my family supports me. but i’m not doing what i want to be doing. i genuinely feel like i’m living the same day over and over again. and on top of all that, i moved to a new city at the start of all this change, and still feel like i don’t really have a niche or many friends to rely on.
anyway, all that’s to say my creativity has just been shot. i know i don’t have to justify myself, and i know i don’t owe anyone anything, but it’s frustrating having this wonderful outlet for my creativity but getting in my own way and not utilizing it to its fullest because what? it’s easier to be complicit with unhappiness? i don’t want that, and i’m working to get away from it. i thank you kindly for your constant patience and kindness with me. this whole 20s thing is weird and confusing.
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Hi! I’ve been reading your stuff for a while and finally worked up the courage to ask: Are you,,, are you secretly Yana or something? Everything you write but specifically the analyses make so much sense and show such a good understanding of the characters that it’s starting to feel like the realization of those “how I would interact with my fan base if I ever became a famous writer” posts.
Jokes aside (unless?) I honestly don’t think I would still be playing Twisted Wonderland if it wasn’t for your blog. Level locked story is my biggest pet peeve for any video game and I nearly ditched midway through book 2 because of it. Your posts have kept me excited about the characters and the story and now I’m nearly done book 5 (stuck again by the level thing but oh well)
Really I just wanted to thank you for all the amazing writing you do
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Heya, hello, hi ^^ Thank you for gathering the courage to share your thought! I know that can feel awkward or overwhelming for some people, so I'm grateful to receive asks like this.
zvsksbjwgehCSfX I’m definitely not Yana, I’m just a casual fan 😂 unless…?/j I tend to hyperfixate and see creative writing and analysis as an outlet to think deeper about what we have + tide me over during the early stretches of TWST when new content and banners were not as consistent as they are now. If other people (like you!) enjoy that, then I’m glad!!
Gacha games like Twisted Wonderland take a lot of time and investment (with fairly repetitive gameplay), so it's normal and totally okay for people to feel bored or burnt out by it. I'm definitely also someone that wouldn't have been as involved as I am now if I hadn't found a community to get excited about TWST with me. It's nice to have people to bounce off of! I'm happy that I was able to be part of your own TWST journey. Again, thank you for your appreciation!! Wishing you good luck with book 5 and beyond~ 🍀
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usernameyettocome · 1 year
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Can I offer you some Anthony Janthony Crowley in these trying times
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dreamyprinx · 1 year
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he’s performing a gay ass magic act
✧ reblogs are appreciated ✧ | ♡ buy me a kofi ♡ | ☾ commission info ☽
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paranormeow7 · 5 months
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feverishly telling myself that everyone grows at their own pace while seeing yet another 13 year old with beautiful sistene chapel worthy art skills and looking back at the bland horribly drawn unappealing genuinely fucking worthless pieces of trash in my sketchbook and desperately trying to convince myself that I don’t want to quit drawing and that I do still like it and that bad art is still art (it’s not when I do it)
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being sick as an adult sucks. wdym my mom won’t just automatically make sure I eat food instead of exclusively drinking Gatorade all day. wdym I have to ask my roommates to make me dinner. I have to Venmo a friend money to buy me more Gatorade?? I can’t focus enough to do homework??? I hate this.
#this is a silly haha humor post but in all seriousness.#COVID rly is just making me stare all the internalized ableism in the eye#yes worth isnt defined by productivity and disability and the idea of being a burden is part of being human and isn’t shameful at all#until I have to minorly inconvenience people to meet my basic needs#I really want to eat dinner but that would require asking my roommates to make me dinner which is just. 5 kinda of mortifying.#even though if someone I knew was sick I would not be upset about making them food! sick people need to eat!#my parents ordered me chipotle yesterday bc they were so concerned bc of how I sounded over the phone#and my friend went out and bought me juice and Gatorade and popsicles and took me to the doctor#the support system Exists I just feel bad about having to use it T-T#I just want to be hugged and read to and reminded to eat food but I am an adult now and not at home#lonely TT-TT#it’ll be okay I’m probably just emotional bc I’m sick and hungry#I also just am struggling so hard because I want to catch up on my classwork Right Now#but I can get through maybe one assignment before I’m too exhausted to keep sitting up#and I have to lay down and close my eyes and sleep or do a light activity like playing candy crush for the fifty bazillionth time#I’ve gotten through like. 100 levels this week.#I’m losing my dang marbles. I am gonna be so behind in ASL Susan is gonna be so disappointed in me#I feel like I have all this energy when I’m laying down bored but as soon as I sit up I feel like I’m floating and about to fall over#so. so tired. why can’t I be healthy already and do homework T-T.#I’m choosing to take this as a lesson to slow down and not overwork myself so hard. instead of being mad at myself for getting behind.#<- is trying and failing not to be mad at herself for getting behind
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lesbiansanemi · 1 year
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When will I learn that I don’t actually like bnha that much
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codgod · 6 months
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i have ART that i want to POST but i CANT because OPTUS is SHIT
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allmpa · 1 year
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Reg is a “skip all my classes then catch up 2 weeks before exams by working 13h every day at the library” type of guy
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plaid-maniac · 9 months
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“Hey There, Trucy”
A story about the seven year gap and an exploration of a drastic change in parenting for Trucy.
Prologue:
In another story maybe Phoenix would have been more cautious. But it has been 2 years since he’s had his badge and he wants this investigation to be over with. He wants to be free to visit his friends without the ever present state of suspicion all around him. He wants Kristoph in jail and his life to be whole again.
In another story maybe he would have been more attentive to things around him. But he’s exhausted from a late night at the Borscht Bowl where some of the patrons got just a bit too rowdy if the bruises from the fight were anything to go by. They weighed him down with just another layer of pain because he was in no mental shape to get over his fear of medicine to try and ease the burden.
In another story maybe Kristoph wouldn’t have come to visit. But he was able to get the last trial settled earlier than expected due to a shock confession from a witness. His client got off the hook much faster than he would have thought, and with very little effort on his part, meaning he could work on some of his other “projects”.
In another story maybe he wouldn’t have thought to try and speed things up. After all, it would be bad to go too fast into something without taking proper precautions. But Phoenix isn’t the only one getting tired of the cat and mouse game, and he recently got his hands on something that could end this without a hitch.
But it’s only in another story that that is the case. Because this “brand new thing” is actually rather old, falling well past the expiration date. Even if you drank all of it, it wouldn’t be able to simulate a perfect heart attack as it has been advertised to him. So only relying on a smudge is a fools choice that can only send someone to the hospital at best.
It’s in this story that all of this comes to a head with a knock to the Wright Talent Agency’s door.
Fake smiles and beating around the bush appear in many stories, and this one is no different. Phoenix lets him inside, comforted by the fact that Trucy is away at school just in case something does happen. He doesn’t let up his constant attention on the other man despite how tired he is of all of this. He may want it to be over, but he isn’t a quitter.
Kristoph, meanwhile, is scouting out the perfect place and time to leave the solution to his problems. He watches the other man as intently as he is watched, waiting for an opening that might not even appear. He stays in the kitchen all the same just in case.
In another story, Trucy would have listened to her father about not leaving her books on the floor.
It is only as Phoenix has completely fallen over, igniting all the bruises in his body, and started silently cursing that Kristoph strikes, leaving his perfect plan on the prongs of a fork. One of the few currently clean fork in the apartment. It is only a matter of time now before it ends up completing the job.
It takes him much longer to get up than normal. His body and soul is worn and he just wants to rest. But when he stands up he is reminded that there is no rest for the weary or the wicked, and he has to simply continue on.
In another story it would worry him at just how easy it was to get the other man to leave before Trucy came back. But they had been talking about the case that went so perfectly and Phoenix knew he would probably want to scope out for a new case like a bloodhound looking for prey. So he didn’t think as much of it as he really should.
And all thoughts about that interaction left his mind when his daughter came home from school.
And all thoughts of worry were quashed for the moment as he worked on dinner for her and lunch for himself.
And all thoughts of his weariness were replaced by thoughts of needing to do the dishes, but there were still clean plates and forks so they will use those and he will wash everything after.
And everything was smiles and laughter as she told him about today’s class and how her teacher got upset for her turning her classmates pencils to rubber.
And everything was concerned looks and furrowed brows as she became paler and paler.
And everything was running feet and gaging into the toilet as she was overcome by a sudden illness.
And everything was hurried phone calls and sirens as she started to drift into the darkness.
And everything was black.
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cloneboywonder · 9 months
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I almost accidentally texted my boss that “it’s so hard being a teenage girl in her 20s” :-(
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sunnibits · 1 year
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*insert that one office meme* making ocs is so cool, I’d love to know literally anything about them some day :)
#vent that I will probably regret later incoming sorry!#feel free to ignore#aaahahaa I honestly need to stop looking at other ppls oc art because it literally just makes me mad!!#whyyyy the fuck is everyone else always better at making ocs then I am 😐 I’m tired of it#yes I may post nonstop ab loving Reggie but honestly. I am constantly sick with envy about other ppls ocs#it just feels like everyone else always has soooo many more cool ocs and they’re so much more developed#like they actually know what’s fucking going on and they’re actually interesting#and have cool ass designs that I could never come up with#and I’m sick of it!! I’m sick of it!!!! I just want that!!#why am I literally incapable of making characters I actually care about I don’t get it#every time I try to come up with an original story I get bored fucking instantly#it has helped a little but to stop worrying about stories so much and just make ocs that are fun to draw#but god I just want cool fun ocs!! more of them!!!! that I actually know shit about!!#like am I just lazy or is developing characters sooo hard#no matter how much I like a character in the beginning I always feel like everybody else’s ideas are a million times cooler#ugh#I’m fucking tired of it#like how am I supposed to fulfill my childhood dream of writing a novel if I never produce any original ideas that I’m able to stick to 😐#I’m just! so jealous!#ugh sorry for venting and being embarrassing I’m just in a weird mood tonight#probably will delete later
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unhinged-nymph · 1 year
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.
#i told myself I wasn’t going to do posts like this anymore but here we are#please ignore#i truly don’t understand what I’m supposed to be living for#I’m tired and sad and so so broke and I have no energy or motivation or inspiration to do ANYthing#I’m trying really hard to convince myself that this is all worth it but like??#the math ain’t mathin#i don’t get to experience love or intimacy#I’m in a job that I’m so sick of but I don’t have the energy to try to find a new one#especially because I don’t even want to work to begin with#i can’t get myself to focus long enough to read or write#i literally come home from work and just stare at the ceiling#or I’m running myself ragged doing colorguard bullshit#i don’t want to do any of this anymore it’s so boring and overwhelming at the same time#and like the world is literally falling to shit around us?#and there’s nothing I can do about it#i just don’t know if I’ll ever find something that makes life worth living#gosh everything seems so pointless and hopeless#I’m not even sad really just so fucking disappointed in myself and this dumb little life#and now what? how am I supposed to fix this? what can I even do?#i have no money no support no back up plan nowhere to go nothing to do#I’m just stuck here with no way out because I’m so alone and mentally I’ll and honestly just so discouraged#i keep thinking that I’ve found my new rock bottom and then someone throws down a shovel and tells me to start digging#i have no idea where to go from here#i keep trying to just take it a day at a time but days just keep coming and going and things get worse not better#and I fall further and further behind#and I’m simply just not strong enough to do anything about anything#I’m OVER this
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whimsyprinx · 1 year
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do y’all think stars are happy
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