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just-a-random-hobbit · 8 months

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Miguel O'hara × Italian!spider!reader hcs

Idk don't ask, I was in the mood for writing smth w a lot of self insert SO

Here we go

It's gonna be messy sooooo sorry not sorry

! Yes, I'm studying Spanish at school, but I'm kinda an ass w it. Sorry for the mistakes !

Since you entered the spider society you only spoke English, but sometimes some Italian words slipped

Same thing happened w Miguel and a lot of times you heard him speaking w himself in Spanish

Next thing you know is that with Miguel you talk in Italian and he talks in Spanish with you, except for a few words yow two can understand each other

An example?

"MIG, TI HO PORTATO IL RAPPORTO SULL'ULTIMA MISSIONE"

"MIG, I GOT YOU THE REPORT ABT LAST MISSION"

"Mh bueno, dámelo"

"Mh good, give it to me"

"VA BENE MA DOVE CAZZO SEI?"

"ALRIGHT BUT WHERE TF ARE YOU?"

"¿PRQUE COÑO GRITAS? ESTOY AQUÍ, ¿DONDE PIENSES QUE ESTOY?"

"WHY TF R U SHOUTING?, I'M HERE, WHERE DO YOU THINK I AM?"

Lovely

Once you brought him some 'nduja (idk maybe you're from Calabria or went there for the holidays) and he loves that, I just know that he does, you can't say otherwise

If you like football you'd watch some matches w him and talk abt them for a few days

I also just know that you two talk shit abt Americans or people in general who cook an abomination and call it "Mexican food" or "Italian food"

Spices vs herbs, an endless war in the kitchen

Sometimes false friend words kick in and the conversation is hilarious

"Mmh ayer he comido unas gambas riquisimas"

"Mmh yesterday I have some delicious shrimps"

* disgusted * "tu cosa?"

"You what?"

(Gambas in Spanish means shrimp, in Italian it means leg) (omg idk if this is a word used in Spain and not in Latino America hold on a sec) (ok in Mexico it's camarón, can we pretend for a sec that it's also used gamba?) (It's not bc I don't have a lot of dialogue ideas, ofc not...)

"¿Me traes aquél vaso porfavor?"

"Can you hand me that glass please?"

* confused * "oook?" * hand him the flower vase *

(Vaso in Spanish means glass, in Italian it means flower vase)

(Ik these situations are really clichés but I still find them cute and funny)

You are siesta/pennichella mates

Now imgine if you get closer and closer w Miguel and invite him over for the Sunday lunch, (probably since you are a spiderperson you don't have a lot of relatives anymore, BUT LET'S IMAGINE THAT AT LEAST GRANDMA IT'S STILL WITH US)

Like- how cute it would be, w grandma saying to this beast of a man: "ma stai sciupato, mangia ancora qualcosa" ("you are so thin, eat some more") and he just keeps eating what she gives him bc he can't say no.

I also think that he's not really used to big family reunions, I read a few comics but I didn't catch any hint of a big family tree, so maybe he'd be kinda disoriented if you have a really big family.

For all my northern lovelies (me included) he's gonna be surprised when he sees that we aren't the italian bubbly and cheerful stereotype, but kinda cold and grumpy.

Another thing for the northeners: he's gonna bitch abt the time we usually have lunch and dinner. Lunch at 12/13 and dinner at 19/20???? You must be joking (Yes, the average northener eats early, obviously it depends on the family. In my experience and the ones of my friends these are the usual eating times)

If you still go to school and (like me) go to school also on Saturday: he's shocked. That's it. Just shocked that you have only one day to rest. But this helps to remind him that taking breaks it's important, so you two hopefully spend some time relaxing together, taking a break from school and being spoderman/spiderwoman.

Again, for people who go to school: he listens to your meltdowns. Even if he's from the future and from another country he understands that the school system stopped evolution in the mid 20th century and it fucking sucks.

If you struggle with subjects like chemistry or science he's more than glad to help you

If you go to a liceo he kinda sees himself in you and your experience, so with lots of subject to study and standars super high

If you have Spanish as a second foreign language at school he's definitely going to help you. YOU HEARD ME? YOU AIN'T GOING ANYWHERE UNTILL YOU LEARNED PERFECTLY TODOS LOS IRREGULARES DEL SUBJUNTIVO!!!!! (I really need his help)

If you go to a professional/technical (idk how to translate themmmm) institute with subjects in the field of engineering and computers he's gonna help you if you need help, giving you some tips and extra informations so that you can be the best of your class.

Let's say that you live in Milan: there aren't a lot of skyscrapers, but there are still some buildings on which you can swing decently. Same thing goes for most of the big cities

Now let's say that you live in a small town, in the middle of the countryside, where the tallest building is the bell tower of the church: "how the fuck do you swing and jump and- do litterally all the spiderthings?" And you just show him that you attach you webs on the top of the nearest strong tree or house. He's just like:

Hhhhhh WHAT SHOULD I ADDDD

IDFKKKKK

Bye

Edit: ok got 3 more hcs

The idea of always having a sweet breakfast was kinda weird to him, and didn't really got used to it really fast. But with some time he found the combinations that he preferred: espresso and gocciole

He's team gocciole

He's also team lemon estathé

#miguel o'hara #across the spiderverse #spiderman 2099 #miguel o'hara x reader #miguel o'hara x you #miguel o'hara fluff #miguel o'hara x y/n #miguel o'hara x italian!spider!reader #miguel o'hara italiano #miguel o'hara headcanons #miguel o'hara hcs #miguel o'hara random

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incarnateirony · 3 months

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KK Guys I'm done with Loki's Workbook* (TM Shealyn Bonds) and the homework before i come in tartarus again for Hermes' Workbook. Oh wait, the notes got scrambled there somewhere. Oh well, I'm sure that doesn't matter, who needs clarity? NIGHT.

The begging won't work, no matter how many angles you put it from. The only zealot here is my ex wife grooming people to rape my face and telling people it's a god, while still getting us confused on the who's who while we both beat her fake ass for it after three years of harassment stalking me. Because you're obsessed. Because you've got your shit all fucked up. So we're fixing it.

We are both being violated in our own multiplied ways, and we are both solving it our own ways, but we also just work well together, cuz that's what a quarter century of work does, remember that part? We both have every right to end the broach of our consent and when it's ongoing, we can do it however we want, no means no, Shealyn. You consent with your signature. That you signed your entire house and practicing identity to. This isn't hard.

I don't care how many fucking times you try to respin the tale, this isn't a tale, Shea, this is real life, and you're learning that with a quickness. The roleplay is over, it's done, let it go, because the real part is gone too, and all you're doing is giving us rent free space that's been magnetizing you to stalk my dick so hard you were blowing furries for half a year to get at my old friends, it's done girl, we're ending it.

Until you close that open door you signed your everything to while imagining and performing ritualistic things to the likeness, name, and stories of, you are literally deifying me, and signed to me, there's no arguing that. If you don't want to be my zealot, then get off my dick, that's been the terms since the start.

How the fuck do you think I can find you in any timeline or pantheon to tell you to read a goddamn book and do the work, dumbass. You have given me years of free space in your head, I have literally been able to waltz into your head and poke what I want, there's an entire mansion of bad copies of my shit up here, but man, all it took was putting on my own face and pretending to act more like him one night and you gave EVERYTHING up hard enough I woke up traumatized and tartarus twitter was writing it on the bathroom walls, like. Fuck. The rest is all shadow work fodder. But damn, you need a whole team. Thanks for making me one with these charged aspects though, they make great easy ownership mask transitions in the whole ... thing you don't understand. It's great!

But yeah, loyalty cuz you dream of it even when disloyal and refusing his guidance for years. Never ever would make a joke at your expense or give a punishment, because you're a special star, you Belief* it. ...Helllllllooooo... Trickster?

Remember I said, at the start... if you really only had that dream after six months of wasting your life... he was the first one slapping on the Kick Me sign for what was inevitably beginning, because he never warned you? Waited till it'd hurt most, conveniently in the onset of these mail shipments and funny disco preparations? Remember that? Hellllloooooooo? No? Nothing rings any bells, even when I can hear jerusalem ringing from here. I see.

Shealyn bonds is a middle aged woman realizing her emotional support sex pillow of her ex husband she tricks her current fiance into pretending to be is not, in fact, a god and that god does not, in fact, consider her more special than every hero that ever lived just because she dreamed it in a roleplay one day. No she's realizing the goddude is legit like "you smell like shrimp and look like one too, and the cat thing is Very Fucking Funny" and she's every stock RP woman she called insane, right down to being a comical mirror of Allie from the Brian->Aaron life transition period in the roleplays she was so goddamn obsessed with before she got her head lost in her ass.

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haus-mom · 4 months

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hello and welcome to guidingThulite's blog for reblogs!

my name is alma (i also go by amaya!) and i'm 18+. not the blog, even though tumblr flagged it as mature?????? i rarely post nsfw and if i do it's mostly jokes, but whatevs. someday i'll go rogue and post female presenting nipples so they flag me for a reason

about my frequent tags and some more info below!

you want to commission me? here!

you just want to give me money? very much appreciated! here, too!

generally, for miscellaneous memes and stuff that i don't post about as often so i feel there's no need for a tag, i use #misc!

if i like a post a lot, i'll tag it as #fav!

if i go off in the tags, i usually add #alma rambles. it's also the tag i use for asks! though sometimes i forget and i use #alma answers instead. and sometimes i forget to use #alma rambles altogether

though me rambling on the tags is the norm but still

i also have a tag for those cheesy and often badly photoshopped valentine cards. just because.

my fandom tags!

right now i'm hyperfixating on project sekai, so that's what you'll see the most of in the blog. the tag is #proseka. i mostly post about tsukasa, but kanade and minori are my other two favs!!! mmj is my fav group! i am also a big defender of rarepairs so you'll see like. a lot lmao.

it's probably because i've been a vocaloid fan ever since the dawn of time (2011). the tag is #vocaloid! i'd talk about my fav producers but it's honestly a p big list hehe

i also really like kagerou project. the tag is #kagepro! i'm a big harutaka enthusiast. yuukei yesterday makes me cry. also a shintaka truther. poly yuukei quartet in general.

if there's something you should know about me is that i have a very-not-healthy-very-not-normal obsession with anything created by game dev #parun. i played re:kinder when i was like 13 and it genuinely changed me as a person. the tag's not organized like at all but someday it will. maybe. click for me rambling about how much me playing re:kinder changed the timeline or whatever. i've also played heisei pistol show and gone through gote to handa and if! gote to handa made me experience shrimp emotions. BIG DISCLAIMER OR WARNING OR SOMETHING. EITHER WAY, PLEASE READ: this has happened to me before, so if you want to play re:kinder because i don't stop talking about it or anything like that, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE look up the trigger warnings or ask me, i don't mind providing them. it's a VERY HEAVY game and i don't recommend you play it if you aren't feeling well mentally. let's ignore that's what i did when i was 13 but hey! i was 13!

i'm a big nintendo as in the franchises fan, so i post a lot about it! i usually use the tag #smash bros when two or more franchises interact, even if it doesn't have much to do with smash itself. it is mostly just smash though

i have been posting a lot about super mario lately.the tag is #mario. mostly misc stuff but sometimes i'll get into A Mood and it'll be either super paper mario or the mario & luigi rpgs (esp superstarsaga, peasley my beloved)

the mother trilogy is my most beloved and mother 3 is my favorite game ever so yeah. the tag is #earthbound!

there's also kirby! who doesn't love kirby? i love that li'l guy. the tag is #kirby. i pretend i understand the lore but every day i grow more confused.

now, as for regrettable decissions: the pokemon tag is just #pokemon even though i post about mainline, mystery dungeon and other spin offs often. everything is mixed. oh god. explorers is my beloved and, as you can see, hau is my son. sinnoh has my heart.

speaking of confusing storylines! i am, regrettably, a homestuck fan. the #homestuck tag could be completely replaced with a johnkat tag though. it's either johnkat or classpecting with next to no inbetween. i complain about canon a lot too lol

i'm a big ace attorney fan, i've played all the games! though i left the crossover midway and never played again <;/3 someday, i guess. the tag is #ace attorney! i also have a separate tag for dai gyakuten saiban, or the great ace attorney, #dgs spoilers are tagged for the latter two as "dgs spoilers" and "dgs2 spoilers"

i am also a jojo's bizarre adventure fan! i've seen parts 1-6 and i mostly post about narancia. i love that funky little dude. the tag is #jjba!

speaking about mafia-related animes, i also enjoy bungou stray dogs! when i say i enjoy bsd i mean i post ranpo and only ranpo. ok that's not true. i post ranpoe and ada found family too :> the tag is #bsd!

now, for something completely different, osomatsu-san! i can't say i have something i post more than anything but i really, really like beni and i'm always talking about how they're my brother and i frfr. i don't post blm-tsu. the tag is #ososan!

i post about the disastrous life of saiki k. the tag is #tdlosk and i am very normal about akechi. i promise.

speaking of akechis! #persona is also a thing. 4 is my favorite but anything with hamuko on it is an instant reblog from me. i lied though. my fav persona game is q2. but only 3 people including me played it in the west. it's okay. that means i'm hikari's number 1 fan!

i used to be the biggest inazuma eleven nut back in 2018 and sometimes i miss it so i reblog spree until i'm normal again. the tag is #inaele! the fandom was really small so i just reblogged whatever i liked, but i have a really soft spot for hamano, hayami and kurama, aka inago's second year trio! i also like yokai watch a lot! the tag is #yokai watch. i would die for hailey and USApyon. my fav game is 3!

things i don't really post about that often but they have a tag so might as well put it here:

#kingdom hearts

#twewy

#sonic

#warioware

#danganronpa

#parappa the rapper

#sam and max (slowly BUT SURELY getting into it)

#disney (doubles as an epic mickey tag ig)

#phineas and ferb and #milo murphy's law

#steven universe

#captain underpants

#hxh

#dragon ball

#rhythm heaven

#genshin impact

#puyopuyo

#haikyuu

#keroro gunso. or sgt frog. idk. frog alien man :)

#your turn to die

#rpg maker games

#wander over yonder

#undertale (doubles as a deltarune tag)

#owari no seraph

#lisa trilogy (the first, the painful, the joyful, you know the works)

#ffix (like a couple of posts or so)

#welcome to hell (y'know, the short/webcomic) (all of these posts are old as hell please save me from me from 2015)

#dungeon meshi

there's probably more i'm forgetting but i'll add them as i remember!

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wendystales · 3 years

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Memories - lrh (Chapter Four)

Memories (also on Wattpad)

Chapter Three ※※※※※ Chapter Five

I absorbed and enjoyed the silence that was hovering around my house. I grabbed a glass of juice and sat down on the couch on the balcony. My mom left early for work, and Leah even tried to take me along for a photo shoot she was going to do in Venice. But, honestly, I'm not in the mood for dragging plaster casts around under the sun.

Not to mention that it is good to have moments alone to get my head straight. I know that in a little while it will be even harder to escape from these outings, I mean, I know I have to get back to my routine, but as long as I can avoid it, I will.

I put the juice on the table and pick up my diary. Unlike yesterday, I open it to the first page, like a book, and start reading. I go through a few pages about my feelings, about what I planned about my future, about my parents' divorce.

"I know it was inevitable. Anyone could tell how distant they were, I just didn't want it to be like that, that she suffered the same way I did. And I didn't want to feel that anger from him. But deep down, I know it's for the best.".

A few more pages telling about the scout who had seen me at the mall, the first photo shoot, the first runway show for a small clothing brand. Then arriving at the day I met Ashton.

"That one nobody expected/imagined/sought for. Ashton Irwin is my yoga partner!!! Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Oh my gosh, I never would have imagined that. I was dying of nervousness about being the new student, then he comes and offers to be my duo and oh gosh, he's amazing. Super fun and nice. AND HE CALLED ME UP FOR COFFEE ON SUNDAY.

" Ashton and I sat at a table on the sidewalk. Under the table, I snapped my fingers in nervousness as I read the menu.

- Do you already know what you are going to order? - he asks. I pout and nod my head in denial.

- All I know is that I don't want espresso. - I comment.

- Can I recommend one? I think you'll like it, it's whipped with cream and chocolate, very sweet. - He points to the menu after I accept his suggestion.

- It amazes me how good you are at coffee. - I joke, making him laugh.

- I like coffee. I once took a tour of a coffee farm in the countryside right here in California.

Coffee becomes our first topic. Because he knows and understands coffee, Ashton convinces me to do a tasting at a promising coffee shop in Brentwood the next morning. It was not the kind of program I am used to doing, but everything is different now, my life has changed and so have my types of programs.

- You are lost being my friend, I will call you all morning for breakfast together. - Ashton comments as we drive along the sidewalks of Los Angeles.

My body shakes when it hears the word "friend". I still wasn't sure if I could consider Ash a friend, but now, I'm happy to know that I can and that he considers me too. "

The memory warms and cheers me up, giving me more desire to read and remember.

I don't realize how much I was smiling until my cheeks start to hurt. After that day, his name becomes very frequent, until it joins Leah's.

"I don't know how to explain this girl. She came in so confident and nose to nose, I was sure she would be insufferable, then she opened her mouth and all I could think was 'where has she been all my life? ' And I don't want to get my hopes up or be a pain in the ass, but she's also a model and she talked about me going to her father's agency and if that works out? it's one of the biggest agencies in the world, I'm going to take off. God, if this is your will...".

I laugh at the following narrations that already involve Ashton, Noah and Leah. I can't remember what is written, but my imagination gives me a warm, happy feeling in my body. And if the reality has been as fun and nice as what I imagined, then it was very good.

I feel my body shiver and a chill take over my stomach when I see Luke's name for the first time. I cut the pace of my reading, preparing myself for what was to come. I reach for another glass of juice, buying time and even courage to read the rest.

"I had already noticed him looking at me, I just didn't want to believe he was looking at me, and it was perfect like that, until Ashton brought him in. It's one thing to know who Luke is, it's another to talk to him. In the end it wasn't so bad. I guess. I just stared for the first hour at anything but him, but I guess he must have missed it. Now I'm in the dilemma of if he liked me, I mean, we spent four hours talking and nothing, no kiss, no phone exchange. NOTHING."

I laugh at myself. I can perfectly see myself being embarrassed by him and not being able to look him in the eye.. If I could go back in time, I would tell this Marnie that Luke really liked her, even though I only had a basis in videos and pictures.

I pick up my cell phone and open insta, going to the date that marked my diary. 07/06/18. It was Ashton's birthday party. I flip to the side and see a picture taken in Hawaii, with the caption "The one where we got lost". I turn the page and find that trip.

"I know I am committing one of the biggest follies of my life and deep down, I don't even know why. That's a lie, I do, but that's not the point. In fact, it is, but that's not what I'm going to talk about. Again, it is. The point is: I can't believe that at the last minute I agreed to go on a trip to Hawaii with a bunch of people I barely know. Except Ash, Noah and Leah. And P.S. Monday is his birthday. It only gets better.”

Apparently things between Luke and me went pretty quickly. I read a few more pages seeing that on his birthday, we had our first kiss and from then on everything happened too fast and messy.

I write about many fights and reconciliations. Both he and I, didn't want anything serious, but both he and I, couldn't stay away from each other and there was my reason.

"There is a good big part of all this blocking that I believe is because of what happened and because of me trying to pretend it didn't happen. Dr. Prescott says that if I don't put it out there and don't talk about it, it will consume me. 'Talking about our fears, worries and problems makes them smaller and easier to defeat.'

Besides my parents, no one else knows about that day."

I run my eyes quickly down the page, seeing that that one was about Stephen's cheating.

I close the journal in fear. I don't know what is coming, and I don't know if I have the courage to read it. It is one thing to hear about it from others, from their view and opinion, even if it is not on purpose. It's another to hear about it from my view, from what I've been through.

I have no doubt that there are things in these next pages that maybe even my parents don't know. Things and feelings that I have kept solely and exclusively to myself and I don't know if I am ready to face this, again.

I put down the diary and go in search of something else. Luckily for me, my guardian angel, aka Leah, calls me.

“Are you busy? I thought we could have lunch together. What do you think?” she bombards me, not letting me say hello.

“Hi to you too. No, I'm not busy, just reading my diary.” I run my hand over the cover, keeping in the back of my mind what awaits me. “ I'll take lunch.”

Before Leah can answer, I hear a muffled argument on the phone and wait for the fight to end.

“Sorry, but Noah is asking if he can come along.” she asks, without patience.

“Of course he can.” I hold my laughter, imagining the two of them fighting on the other end of the line.

“Okay, in a few minutes we'll be there. Kisses.”

I say goodbye to her and decide not to read the diary again. The doctor himself told me not to force myself into anything. I set the table and wait for the two of them to arrive.

After forty minutes, the doorbell rings. I make way for my friend and analyze the tall, muscular man behind her. Unlike my memory, the Noah of today has his hair well shaved and brunette, like his sister's. His green eyes fill with tears when he sees me crack a smile, and like his twin, he doesn't wait for permission and hugs me.

“Don't ever do that again, young lady. What a shitty world this would be without you!” he squeezes me before showering me with kisses, all over my face.

Leah turns and pulls him away from me, making me laugh. I follow them both into the kitchen and look at the bags they brought, excited.

“We made sure to stop by The Palm and pick up your favorite dish.” I didn't even know that I had a favorite dish at The Palm. But when Leah opens a box and I feel my mouth water when I see that noodle with shrimp, I realize how little I know myself.

“Have I ever told you that I love you?” I ask softly, with a smile.

We start lunch and today my attention was on Noah, after all he was the new thing. I listen to him tell about the day we met, when he began to advise my career with his sister, and how things have been going since the accident.

“You don't have to give any interviews if you don't want to.” he assures me once again.

I still don't know how to deal with this "public figure" business, but deep down I feel a need to give a "satisfaction" to everyone who knows me. Noah has already sent some notes about my condition, but I know that I will have to appear on some channel in the future.

We changed the subject and started talking about my amnesia. Noah was not very happy that my first memory was his hair fiasco. I commented that I was reading my diary and asked about some events.

“Are we really lost in Hawaii?” they both started to laugh and agree.

“That day I wanted to hit Mark. I was getting very angry that he could not accept that he was reading the wrong map. Not to mention the car dying and us pushing," Noah comments.

“Mark was never good with maps. He says himself that he was a lousy Boy Scout.” Leah says before drying her third glass of water.

“Who is Mark?” I question.

“Mark is an ex-lover of mine. At the time we were chatting and he had the house in Hawaii. One thing led to another and in the end he went along.” Leah ends with a frown.

“And why did we let him drive then?” I ask, full of curiosity. They look at me as if I know the answer. Or, as if I should, but I just raise my eyebrows, saying nothing.

“Because it's Mark.” Noah shrugs. “He likes to be in control of everything.”

“The one who was definitely happy with us there was that guy who owns the coconut stand.” Leah says.

So there it is, the little wooden stand, with a pile of coconuts in front of it. A short man, probably about 50 years old, laughing at our misfortune while selling the fruit to us. Images begin to form in my mind.

" “- Look there.” Kyleen and I focus on the little man laughing as he takes the money from Michael's hand. “He sure is very happy with us standing here.” Leah says.

“Of course he is. We already bought twelve coconuts from him. Bad little man.” I make a face.

“We're not lost. It's just a shortcut.” we cut off eye contact with the stand and focus on Mark arguing with Noah and Ashton.

Leah looked at her lover in total disbelief at what she had gotten herself into. If regret could kill. The next moment Mark stomps his foot on the floor, like a child with a temper tantrum. At that moment, Calum looks at me with wide eyes.

I look away so that he doesn't see me laughing. Kiki, who was behind me, slaps me to stop, but this only makes me want to laugh more. I hide my face in her arm and in the end, my laughter gets out of hand. Both she and Calum start laughing with me, causing the boys to look at us curiously.

It takes no more than five minutes for Mike to join in the laughter with us and soon everyone else was laughing except Mark. Even the little bad man was laughing. It was the worst thing about us being lost, but that's what was happening and it couldn't be anything but comical, even though it was sad too. ”

“Of course he was happy. He sold about fifteen coconuts for us.” I don't even try to control my smile. Once again I remembered, and this is more than great.

The twin couple in front of me crack a big smile too, and soon they are clapping their hands and stamping their feet on the floor, making noise. I clap my hands with them in celebration.

“She is coming back.” Noah comes around the table, hugging me from behind and again showering me with kisses.

I was never one to have many friends. Usually it was just Bethany and Stephen, and a girl in my music class, but I don't know if I can consider her that, after all, we only talked during class and it was all very unrelated.

The point is that I have always envied those people who managed to have a large number of friends, and friends really, not just colleagues. Friends who call you for everything, who are always by your side, who enjoy your company, and who consider you family.

In this moment, with just Noah and Leah, I can see that I finally have these friends that I have wanted so much and without having to pretend to be something that I am not, without having to buy their attention, as I felt I needed it with Bethany. And if I'm happy like this with just the two of them, I can't wait to see the others.

“So, you said you were reading your diary, did you remember anything else?” Leah asks excitedly.

All the happiness and euphoria that had surrounded my body disappears. The bloody page with the bloody day comes back into my mind. They both notice my mood drop.

“I remembered a day when I went to have coffee with Ash, but…” I play with the edge of my cup, trying not to get too much into that energy. “I found a day where I tell about what happened.” I look at them, who are serious and attentive.

“Do you want us to read it with you?” Leah holds my hand across the table, gently patting it.

I shake my head positively and point to the notebook on the coffee table in the living room. I watch her return with the notebook and hand it to me. I open it to the marked page and stare at my handwriting again.

"I haven't had the courage to tell either Ashton, Leah, or much less Luke. I can't tell if I'm ashamed of it or just afraid of it happening again. The problem is that it's really starting to get to me, to the point where I get irritated when I see Luke and Leah talking and it shouldn't be like that. So I need to get it all out so that I can start over.

It was our anniversary. I snuck out of my work to see Stephen at his house. I wanted to deliver his gift soon. Two streets before his house I ran into Noelle, his mother, and told her I wanted to surprise him, so she told me to get the key under the third vase and go in.

Maybe it would have been better just to ring the doorbell and not have to see it. I was very quiet so as not to be discovered, and in the end, I was the one who discovered something."

My racing heart hurts from beating so hard. I can't keep my breathing normal, holding it at various times. I feel like it's a suspense book where no one wants to find out what's behind the door of the abandoned house, but needs to, in order to continue the story.

I notice in some letters and words the ink smudged and I know it was from my tears and it only hurts me more.

"There is no word to describe the disgust, pain, and anger of seeing him and her in bed naked. My until then boyfriend, and my until then best friend.

And what only made it worse was that she didn't even try to explain herself, didn't show an ounce of regret, even if it was a pretense. Nothing. While he tried to say it was nothing like that, Bethany still says it had been going on for a long time."

I close the journal angrily and throw it away, stopping on the other side of the long table. The lump in my throat gets bigger, but I don't want to cry, not for this and not again.

Deep down, I have always had a flea behind my ear with the two of them. The countless rides Stephen insisted on giving her. The way she always motivated me to fight with him, for reasons I thought were small and insignificant. But it was my first serious relationship, what did I know about dating, right? Bethany, on the other hand, had dated seriously twice.

It had always been there, I just didn't want to see it.

“I always suspected it and never, never wanted to believe it. After all, he was my boyfriend and she was my best friend. They wouldn't be able to.” I let out a humorless laugh.

The twins look at me fearfully, as if I were a mother scolding them.

“But you know what the worst part is? I believed him. He looked me in the face and said that nothing happened. That Luke was to blame for our breakup! How stupid of me!” I shout, picking up the diary and throwing it further away, as if it would hurt Stephen.

“Wait, what?” Leah speaks loudly.

I look at her startled and realize what I said. I open my mouth, but nothing comes out. I didn't want anyone to know about the meeting.

“You met with Stephen? When?” she turns the table around, coming closer. I swallow dryly.

“Yesterday morning," I begin softly, but it was enough for Leah to cover her eyes with her hands and snort. Noah laid his head on his arms, sighing as well. “I was confused and needed to hear and see him.” I start to defend myself.

“After everything your mother told you about him?” Leah asks.

“And you think I would believe her? Would you? With amnesia on account?” I retort. Leah takes a deep breath and denies it with her head, giving me reason.

“But you could have told, or asked, I don't know.” Noah ponders.

“Nobody would have let me, I know nobody likes him and rightly so.” I give in.

“That explains a lot.” Leah comments softly, but loud enough for me to hear.

“Explains what?” I ask confused.

She looks at Noah, who nods, giving her the green light. Like me, she swallows dryly before she begins.

“Explain why Luke is so grouchy and weird. Not wanting to come see you.” he answers, poking at the seam of the chair.

NO! No! No! No! No! Please, no. He can't have seen.

“You have to take me to his house.” I ask, heading for the hall.

“What?” the two shout following me.

“I need to talk to him. Now!” I shout the last part, putting on a jacket with some difficulty.

“But why?” Noah helps me.

“Because I think he saw something that wasn't supposed to happen and got it wrong.” I open the door, going to call the elevator.

“Oh, no!” they understand and soon follow me.

Things between Luke and me may be messed up, but the last thing I want him to think is that I cheated on him.

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