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genshxn · 8 months

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dan heng being bad at feelings, the sequel.

started writing this pre-1.3, so i am once again emphasizing that i am making shit up. (well, 1.3 dropped while still working on this and the TB mission was rather lacklustre, so i'm gonna half ignore it).

sorry for any typos/mistakes/whatever, most of this was written at dubious hours of the night.

contains. mild-moderate canon divergence, dubious jing yuan shenanigans, dh being somewhat down bad. i dropped a bit too much spice in, so it is no longer “mild”. take that as you will.

7.5K words. THIS IS SO FUCKING EMBARRASSING.

here's the first part in case you haven't read it. you're still not the trailblazer.

tags: @akhiran @cypunk-0 @fiona782 @seelelovesbronya @bleakqblake @xiaos-poems

this place is not a place of honour. no highly esteemed deed is commemorated here…nothing valued is here. Below 15, DNI. Go away.

the next day, you awoke to a feeling of emptiness at your side. any part of the bed that your limbs weren’t splayed upon was long cold with dan heng’s absence. you were alone, still left in the nest of sheets and pillows he arranged himself. it couldn’t have all been some kind of fever-dream, could it?

no, any such possibility was dashed when you looked at the messages on your phone. one unread, left two hours ago.

with the ellipsis and all. oh, the self-inflicted misery. (does he really consider every single person his enemy?) you sighed, swinging your feet off the side of the bed to get up. if you knew him well enough, then you already knew the next little while was going to be tricky, to say the least. it was obvious what his plan was from the beginning, with him abandoning your side at the sun’s first rays: avoidance.

and avoid you, he did. in the denouement after phantylia’s attack, he still had to be around you, but the stiltedness he carried with him was palpable. he made a point to stand as socially acceptably far from you. it was almost like he was acting like a ghost solely to you. elusive, non-communicative, only seen out of the corner of your eye. perhaps leaving you with the lingering feeling of being watched, and ultimately gone before you could even call his name. in fact, he quite literally ghosted you. he wouldn’t even respond to your messages.

once the day after the final events rolled around, you thought that maybe he would have had enough time to finally be able to face you again, but no. apparently he elected to confine himself to the archives the moment he returned aboard the express. however, this didn’t deter you from going knocking on his door.

"dan heng?" you tapped on the sealed door. your ear was right up against the frame, listening intently.

whatever shuffling was coming from within fell still at your voice.

"dan heng, i know you’re in there. i just heard you stop moving."

there was more silence, then followed by a sigh. "did pom-pom not relay my one request?"

"no, they did. told me that i’m not allowed near the archives."

"yet you’re still here…" his voice was strained, and distant from the door. he must have been sitting either at his desk or on his thin, messy futon. beyond that, it was hard to imagine what he was doing in there, or even what he looked like. it was surprising. you thought he struggled to control his form, but it seemed no problem when he wasn’t with you. so was he the regular old dan heng sitting in there? or the vidyadhara that laid next to you that night?

"you really think i’m gonna listen? i never do." you squared yourself further towards the door. "now, c’mon. we’re already talking, so can’t you just—"

"n-no, i can’t," he cut you off. "i… i’m sorry, but not here, and not like this."

"can you at least tell me why you say you can’t be around m—?" almost as if on cue, in came an angry pom-pom inbound like a squishy freight train.

"hey! what did pom-pom just say?!" they cried. "can’t you follow one simple rule for the time being?"

as pom-pom ushered you away from the archives with weak thumps to the back of your legs, you grunted to yourself. you were tempted to chuck them in the opposite direction, but alas, such a thing was not in the cards for you. after all, it would be wise to not tempt fate with the conductor. things seemed like they were going to be more difficult than you anticipated.

░░░░░░░

early the next morning, long before either march or stelle would rise, you shuffled your way into the parlor car in search of food. if it was going to be anything like yesterday, you were anticipating being the only one in the parlor car. however, to your surprise, there was another person present when you silently closed the door behind you—dan heng. he was in his regular appearance of shorter, fluffy hair and his regular attire. you sighed as quietly as you could, staring at the back of his head that leant on his wrist, propped up on the table. seeing him staring dejectedly at the food was a sorry sight.

the unspoken tradition you had with him was that when the whole express wasn’t eating together, it’d always be you two sharing your meals together. it began when you first joined the express—after dan heng himself, but before march. left adrift as a vagrant amidst the stars, you were all too familiar with the feeling of loneliness. it was always at its worst when you managed to gather together enough scraps to resemble the meals you used to eat in your old home. to you, when possible, meals were something that should be shared in the company of others. so when you first saw dan heng sat alone on your first proper morning aboard, you saw part of yourself in him. a part that you wanted gone, now that you had a new home. so you sat yourself down next to him, your own food in hand. you were met with some minor (albeit polite) resistance, but you being the stubborn ass you were, would not have it. you knew your persistence was risky, but it paid off. not long after that, he would wait until you were sitting with him.

so to see that sight left you saddened, but also vehemently annoyed. normalcy was out the window thanks to this baffling, self-imposed restriction he had against you. as quietly as you could, you stalked up behind him. moving as lightly as possible felt like it was the only way possible to get closer to him. it wasn’t like he developed a sudden allergy to your presence or something, was it?

you were successful in thwarting his pre-occupied senses as you reached the velvet couch. but maybe you were too successful, because he almost leapt out of his skin when you planted yourself down next to him. you leaned against the table and spoke. "how about us talking if it’s over breakfast?"

he did manage to calm down, but not by a lot, and not enough to give you a reply. his expression was still frazzled as he struggled to keep himself in place.

"can you please tell me if i’ve done something wrong? i don’t understand why we’re suddenly like strangers again," you said, reaching out to put your hand atop his one that was clenched at his side. but he snatched it away before you could feel the warmth of it.

"it’s my fault. you’ve done nothing," he said. "but please, i need some time before i can talk to you properly."

he turned to get up and leave, but you caught him by the sleeve. "w-wait, by why?" you trailed off, voiced far weaker than intended.

the look he gave you was weird. it was a jumble of confused emotions, but the most you could make out was nervousness. you had no idea what that light flush could have meant for you. his mouth parted to make some sort of reply, and you could have sworn you the glimpse of sharpened canines. "since when have you had fangs in this appearance?" you blurted out after doing a double take.

his eyes flared wide open and a hand flew over his mouth. "s-since never." with that, he slipped from your grasp. "please excuse me."

you watched incredulously as he walked out of the parlour car and back towards the archives as if he had wooden knees. you had no idea what just happened. rejection, you supposed. but considering how he was that night, it made no sense. nothing about this made any sense.

whatever it was, it was slowly eroding your patience, leaving you biting the inside of your lips in irritation. it’s true you were doing some type of avoidance when his alternate form was finally revealed, but it was nothing of this calibre. it was almost impossible for it to be the case with dan heng, but if this really was some kind of petty revenge, he may as well have whipped out a steel chair after you knocked shoulders with him.

░░░░░░░

your shameful failure of an interaction left you in need of recuperation. you hadn’t felt that irked and downright baffled since one of herta’s curios fell on your head. so now, you were blathering a ranting tirade at stelle and march over some snacks, all in the parlour car. "i swear to whatever aeon’s listening, he’s turned emo or something." you folded your arms across your chest, sinking down in your plush chair.

"like he wasn’t before?" stelle mumbled, not looking up from whatever gacha game she was playing on her phone.

"eh, not really. he does have his moments, though." march shrugged, grabbing a single chip. "but yeah, i’ve never seen anything like this. it’s so weird, he almost never avoids you like this!"

"hence why i’m so confused."

"things seemed to get pretty tense between the two of you after he had his magical girl transformation," stelle added while shovelling a handful of chips into her mouth, still not looking up. "then maybe… the day after phantylia, he got even weirder."

"yeah, like, he won’t go near you for some reason, but he keeps staring at you so longingly and sighing like you’re the last cookie in the jar and he’s been told he can’t have any more!" march said with the melodramatic flourish of a swoon.

"that one sounds like it’s based on real experiences." stelle cast her a sideways glance, to which march let out a sniff and wiped away a dry tear.

"just how much has he been doing that?" you muttered, unable to comprehend.

"a fair amount from what i’ve seen. he’s looked like a kicked puppy every single time," march said. "well, as much as dan heng can look like a kicked puppy."

"not that he’s particularly talkative, but i’ve tried asking him about it. was only met with howling winds of jarilo-vi’s everwinter storm." stelle placed her phone down on the table and sat back with her arms crossed. "but now, he’s just being straight up weird. (y/n), what’d you do to him?"

"yeah, i mean, he won’t even eat in the mornings if you’re there!" march cried.

your nails dug into your knees as you looked at your lap. you could feel a heat creeping onto your face as you recalled him so close to you. his words still rung in your head. if they were true, then what the fuck was he doing now? "i—i don’t really want to say, since it’s between him and i," you said. "but some pretty… significant things happened, i guess."

march suddenly drew in a comically loud gasp. "DID HE FINALLY CONFE—" she began, but you clapped your hand over her mouth before she could finish.

"must’ve," stelle said, leaning forward with her hands on the table loosely clasped in front of her.

"it wasn’t… exactly like that." your voice was low. your attempts to protect your dignity were feeble at best. it’s true, he never explicitly told you he has feelings for you in the classic format of ‘i like you’, but… who were kidding, it was a confession in all forms except literalness. you grabbed at your face, hiding the creeping heat behind your hands with a groan.

"no, it was totally a love confession. he’s been head over heels for you for a while now! even when i first met you two, it was so obvious he had a big ol’ crush on you. how’d you not notice it?!"

"cuz they’re denser than dan heng." stelle deadpanned, staring right at you.

"if you’re going to be making indirect insults about me, at least do it to my face," a familiar voice muttered from somewhere a distance behind you. in walked dan heng, eyes closed and pinching the bridge of his nose. he was once again in his normal appearance. stelle immediately squashed you down beneath the square table, leaving you only to look at everyone’s legs.

"oh, so the elusive dan heng finally graces us with his presence, huh?" you couldn’t see march’s face, but you knew she was making a half-lidded, unimpressed frown at him—the certified march classic.

"i’ve had a lot of information to collate and put into the archives, so i’ve been busy—" his words stopped short. from around the bend of the chair’s edge, you could see him inch closer to the table.

"been busy what? you just stopped talking." march sounded confused.

"is that… (y/n)’s scent?" his tone was far sharper, but his wording sounded unsure.

"are you calling them stinky? that’s kinda rude, isn’t it?" march frowned.

"huh? no, of course not!" he sputtered. "it’s just v-vidyadhara senses. they’re quite acute." there was the shuffling of some fabric. he must have crossed his arms.

"well i say it’s cuz you’re going heehee-silly-delulu with your big fat crush on them." march chimed in. your eyes widened as you frowned. why were they both baiting the literal dragon?

the only sound that came out of dan heng was something like an indignant cry that was cut-off at its head. "i… i do not—"

"you don’t like them? alright, keep telling yourself that," stelle said.

"…what hand does (y/n) have in this? they were just here, weren’t they?" he took a few steps towards the table. you imagined him with a strained look on his face, fighting to keep his composure like he yesterday. as he was stood right in front of you, you felt yourself shrinking back. it was maybe only seconds until ground zero—until everything hit the fan. "because that’s their scent nearby…" he changed his footing just a touch, and the second you saw the tips of his fluffy hair peak down past the table, you launched headlong into him. not by your own volition, but because a heeled boot slammed into your lower back, jetting you forward. your face collided with some part of his legs (of which was not very soft), sending you both in the same direction with simultaneous cries. there was a significant thud when dan heng hit the floor, and your head knocked into something bony.

your eyes cracked open, rubbing your forehead with a groan, but all sounds fell silent when you realized you were hovering between his knees. you stared up at him with wide eyes and a stifled breath, where he met your owlish gaze with his own. in other words, you were almost right between his legs. both of your faces lit like infernos, but neither of you moved. a grand total of two seconds passed before the vidyadhara features came out. it was quick—his horns rose from his head, and his hair spilt over his shoulders. his tail appeared behind him, laying still. even his clothes suddenly swapped out on him. his chest rose and fell as his breath seemed to quicken.

"s-sorry," you swallowed thickly. in almost an instant, he dug one of his clawed hands into his arm. he clambered to his feet, unable to look you in the eye.

"wh-what the hell was that?" his voice cracked.

"fuck, that was my bad." stelle said from behind you.

"ngh, you… please excuse me," he quickly turned and strode back towards the archives, still holding onto his arm. you hadn’t moved from the floor when you watched the passenger cabin’s door close behind him.

"what the heck, stelle?!" march cried, startling you.

"holy fuck, i’m so sorry. i did not think it’d go like that," stelle said. when you looked back over, she was leaning back and had raked her bangs back, hand still on her forehead.

"how did you think it’d go?" you groaned, unsteadily raising to your feet once again.

"i dunno, but not like that."

"why’d he suddenly change like that, i wonder?" march tapped her finger to her chin, looking off to the side.

"cuz he’s down bad." stelle looked very confident in her answer.

you almost choked on your spit.

"he’s down bad, but then he keeps running off 'cuz refuses to let himself be so."

"what kind of a theory is that?!" march huffed.

"a simple observation. mr. yang says i’m perceptive, so i have final authority on all judgements ever made." stelle crossed her arms over her chest, face seldom making any expressions. "and i say exactly what i said."

you stood with your head hanging in your hands, burning with embarrassment. things couldn’t keep going on like this. if this was the new dynamic, then how were any of you supposed to function while you’re out trailblazing? how were any of you supposed to function even just normally? that was it. you raised your head until your eyes lifted from behind your hands, a new resolve filling your blood. maybe jing yuan might know something.

░░░░░░░

managing to secure a time to speak to jing yuan was unbelievably easy. then again, you should gave guessed it’d be. over messages, he told you that since he’s been doing nothing but resting, he’s incredibly bored—someone to see or speak to is more than welcome. and so, it quickly was organized that you could stop by a planned location in aurum alley to see him.

the time soon rolled around, as long as it took. during the day, as expected, there was no sign of dan heng having any interest in interacting with you normally, much to your growing irritation and mild chagrin. even march and stelle were shaking their heads and clicking their tongues in disapproval.

it didn’t take long for you to get there. you agreed to meet him in a small, secluded area, just out of the way of eyes that might seek to pry into the general’s private business. it was a bit into the early evening. it wasn’t too hard to find him sitting at his table since he wasn't exactly the most conspicuous person out there. the golden artificial sunlight poured in from an oblique angle overhead, coating the tucked-away courtyard in a honeyed light. once he saw you approaching, jing yuan cast you one of his usual sleepy, cattish smiles.

"um, hello," you spoke, pulling out a seat next to him.

"and to what do i owe the pleasure?" there was almost a purr in his voice. "tell me, what is it you wished to speak about?" he leaned forward, resting his head on his wrist propped up on the table. "or did you simply come here to chat with me because you felt like it?" he made a closed-eyed smile laced with mischief.

"ah, i’m sorry to disappoint, but it’s because i’m having a bit of a dilemma." you scratched the back of your head with an awkward laugh. "please hear me out on this one, but it’s about dan heng."

"oh, dan heng? what about him?" jing yuan tilted his head. "as it stands, i’m afraid you might know him better than i do, unfortunately. so i don’t know if i would be able to provide the best of help for you." there was a faint, bittersweet smile on his lips, making you bite your own.

"it’s, ah, a little more about him as a vidyadhara, i suppose. i’m not sure if he has anything in common with his previous incarnation, but i thought there must be something there."

"well, i can say his obstinance seems to have certainly survived reincarnation."

"it’s thriving," you huffed, at which jing yuan lightly laughed.

"so is that the root of your problem? him being too stubborn on something?"

"that’s about it, yeah." you pressed your lips into a line. "he’s been avoiding me for… reasons i won’t divulge… and i don’t what i can do to get him to talk to me again."

"you don’t need to put it like that. i can tell he really likes you," he said, the trace of a smug grin on his face. after you coughed loudly, he continued. "he’s rather obvious if you know what you’re looking for. but anyway, what happened between you two? if i’m allowed to know, that is."

you swallowed nervously. should you really be revealing everything like this? you did it anyway. "one night, we said a few things of… i guess questionably romantic nature to each other, and he reacted in a way that i think was influenced by some sort of… vidyadhara shenanigans."

jing yuan looked at you with raised eyebrows and wide eyes. "go on."

"he hauled me off to his bed and then got uncharacteristically affectionate. he had a back-and-forth with self-doubt once he realized i was really confused by it all, but i told him it’s fine. i mean, i even pet his horns out of my own volition and stuff." it was all coming out at this point. "then he eventually drifted off and then pretty much declared his feelings in his half-sleep. but even though i told him i’m fine with him doing whatever he was doing, he still decided to run off the next morning. i’ve tried to talk to him repeatedly, but he won’t reply to my messages and he almost freaks out every time i’m in his vicinity. i don’t get it!"

"mm, that’s quite the situation on your hands there," jing yuan hummed. there was a mischievous spark in his eye, and you weren’t sure if you liked the look of it. "now, i couldn’t tell you the specifics, but if you say he got ’uncharacteristically affectionate’, then that’s definitely some old vidyadhara response. they can get very protective over the things they love."

your gaze dropped somewhere in front of your as your face prickled with heat at his words.

"but now, i’d wager he’s stuck in some sort of self-imposed battle of will against himself."

"and how would you suggest i get him out of it?"

"i suppose there is technically the option of waiting this out," he glanced at your face. you looked embittered at such an inane suggestion, making him laugh. "or you could simply make him lose the battle, since it sounds like he’s set on taking it ad infinitum, if needed."

"small issue… i’m now allowed near the archives," you sighed, leaning yourself back. "it’s hard to simply go there with both the conductor banning me as well as dan heng refusing to open his door."

"hmm…" jing yuan shifted his hand beneath his chin. "might i do something a bit uncouth?"

"uhh, okay."

"come here for a moment." he slid himself next to you, turning to face you a little more. with a slight frown, you turned towards him as well. "now, i can’t guarantee his reaction to this, but—" he suddenly pulled you closer toward him and placed his head in the crook of your neck—the same side dan heng had his. one hand snuck its way around your neck and held the base of your neck ever so gently, while the other looped around your back. you had to fight a shudder when you could feel jing yuan’s lips ghost over your neck and shoulder. "if i do this, it may be enough to knock him from this cycle of his."

"wh-what?" you strained out.

"he’ll be able to tell i’ve been with you. and by the places i’ve been in contact with you…" he said, voice low. his faint breaths were cool on your shoulder. you couldn’t suppress a slight shiver. "…it should be enough to grant you access to… the archives, was it?"

"y-yeah." you blinked a few times. your brain had been reduced to a single cell bouncing around inside your brain like a shitty maraca.

jing yuan finally pulled back, assuming his original pose. "please forgive me for that… but you’ll likely see why i did it." he still couldn’t help but wear his usual small grin for the second part. "i’d now recommend that you find him again, and try to keep his attention long enough for him to notice you were with me. vidyadhara’s senses of smell are perceptive, so it shouldn’t be long. well now, you’d best get back then." his stupid grin was even wider and even smugger. his gaze wasn’t condescending, but read more as if he were thinking just wait and see.

"i… guess i’ll be going then. th-thank you, general." you made an awkward bow as you hustled back the way you came, hyperaware of the air brushing against your shoulder. it all felt incredibly foreboding… but that was to be expected when you were about to enter the dragon’s den.

░░░░░░░

your plan was flawless:

1. jing yuan does his shit

2. go back to the express.

3. bait with bubble tea to get the door open.

4. "talk" to dan heng long enough until he notices jing yuan was up to something

5. ???

6. profit.

just as detailed, to further your chances of getting that door cracked open, you decided to buy a bubble tea. a classic milk should have sufficed, since he tended to favour the more simple things. the chances of him actually opening the door to take it were already slim, but desperate times called for desperate measures. knowing him, he’d simply make you leave it at the door, which was a problem. so there you were, stuck on an express couch, plotting. (or, perhaps more aptly, chewing your nails in nerves). as you sat there, in waddled pom-pom, looking mighty chuffed for some unknown reason.

"hm-hm-hm! dinner of pom-pom’s own creation will be ready in just over 20 minutes!" they declared, puffing their stuffed chest. they waited for any reaction, but no one looked up at them, making them deflate with a scowl. "stelle, (y/n) you go tell everyone," they grumbled, shuffling back into the passenger cart and beyond.

"wait, what?" you looked up—you hadn’t even noticed them.

"we’re on messenger duty," stelle said from her seat. she was placed upside down on the couch, hair grazing the ground while she played her usual gacha games.

"can i try and deal with dan heng?"

"i mean, sure." she looked over at you. "but what’re you plotting?"

"my entry into the archives. i come baring gifts." you motioned towards the untouched bubble tea sitting in front of you.

"i’ll leave you to it. i’ll go tell march and the others then." she chucked her phone elsewhere on the couch and got up, wandering towards the passenger car. you followed shortly behind, offering in hand.

it was a short walk. you knew you were being dramatic, but you couldn’t help but grow more and more nervous the closer you drew to the archives. you had already weathered so many rejections, so it’s not like this was going to somehow have a worse result. perhaps it was because you put too much on this. you’ve gone to a rather large effort just to have a slim chance of getting him to open the door—speaking of, you were already there.

you raised your hand to knock on it, but before you could even lay your hand on it, dan heng spoke from inside. "what is it, (y/n)?" he was once again somewhere further off in the room, speaking with undecipherable emotions.

"um." your voice cracked, making you cringe. "pom-pom said dinner’s ready in 20."

"ah. thank you," he said plainly. it still kinda stung, being back at what felt like the stage where you were only acquaintances.

"i also got you something." you tried to cast another line.

"you can leave it at the door."

you flopped your head against the door. of course he said it. "i’d rather give it to you now. it’s some bubble tea. the ice is melting." there was no response. you couldn’t tell what he was doing. "c’mon, it’s not like you’re sick or something."

"hah, more like lovesick," stelle called as she walked past behind you.

"stelle!" dan heng cried indignantly. he sounded closer to the door. "i am not—"

"if you’re not, then open the door." she simply kept walking.

you were stood with wide, unblinking eyes and an open mouth, watching her jacket pass through the cabin door until you were left alone in the hall. the door suddenly slid open a little. you jumped, turning to stare up at him. as usual, there was a strained look on his face that he was trying to suppress. "see, i’m not—" he looked out and around for stelle, but she was nowhere to be seen. instead, he simply sighed.

you tried to swallow your heart beating in your throat, but it still hammered away. "hi."

he closed his eyes, leaning his head on the inner door frame. "hello," his voice sounded tired. tired with himself. "please forgive me for how i’ve been acting. i know it’s not fair to you. it’s just…"

"i know, you need more time. you like to say it," you muttered with a slight, strained grin. "by the way, here’s your tea. it’s just your usual order." you held it out it to him, and he looked down at it with softened eyes. as he went to grab it, his fingertips brushed over yours. he seemed more startled than you, but after a moment’s hesitation, he placed his hand back over top of yours.

"i haven’t been completely honest with you," he said. (that was certainly one way of putting it).

you held your breath, as if making a single noise could suddenly startle him back into the archives.

"i… since that night, i haven’t known what to do with mysel—" he suddenly paused, frowning the tiniest bit. he leaned forward, seeming to concentrate on something with closed eyes. once they opened again, his pupils had constricted into slits, and he was staring intently at you. uh oh.

"wh-what is it?"

"where were you before this?" he took the tea from you and placed it somewhere next to the door frame inside the archives.

your stomach flipped. was this really going where you thought it was? "um. i was wandering around aurum alley." it wasn't a lie. "why?"

"that’s not all. what else?" he took you by the arm and drew you into the archives. it was an uncharacteristic mess in there. low-lit, and with clothes, books and items were strewn all over the place, perhaps as a reflection of his state. you watched the door close behind you, and when you looked back, there stood dan heng with his full vidyadhara look on display, right in front of you. uh oh.

he stepped closer to you until you could feel the warmth of his body radiating off of him, then grabbing hold of your shoulders. it was a tight grip, but not enough to hurt yet. he dipped his head into the crook of your neck and drew in a long but quiet inhale. "what were you doing with jing yuan?" his voice was low, almost with a slight growl. as he spoke, his arms had wound around shoulders, so he was holding the back of your head, just like jing yuan was. only far harsher than the other’s ghost-like touch.

yes, this was going the direction you thought it was. "we—we only met to talk about something," you sputtered out, your heart in your throat again.

"then why do i smell him on you, as if you were doing something more than just talking?" with a free hand, he took your jaw and turned your face towards him. he was only inches away from you, gazing at you with narrowed, dimly-glowing eyes. "why go to him when you have me?"

you frowned, eyes wide. "huh? what do you mean i have you? you’ve refused to speak to me normally ever since the morning after you hauled me to your bed. besides, i-it’s not what you think."

but your words were lost on him. "no, this won’t do." his voice was barely a murmur. he seemed to be living in his own version of the world. dragon-brain was back, evidently a fuller force than ever. you weren’t sure what you were expecting, but it wasn’t him drawing you even closer, placing his head in the crook of your neck and nuzzling. your face lit like an inferno as some kind of noise escaped your lips. it was really back to the nuzzling. only with surprising fervour, this time. he nestled his face into your neck, exhaling small sighs against you. his nose and lips brushing against your skin was almost ticklish, but you weren’t laughing when his tail snaked itself around your hips, twining itself down one of your legs.

"d-dan heng?!" you cried when he suddenly lifted you with his hands clasped beneath the backs of your thighs, assisted by the tail. he had his mouth placed right over top of your collar bone, watching where he was going from over your shoulder. "dan heng, put me down!" you had to hold onto his back and shoulders for stability.

he gave you no reply, only taking you back to his mussed futon. similar to his bed at the inn, the blanket was strewn in a way akin to the base of a nest. stray pieces of clothing made up the rest of lack-lustre structure—you could have sworn one of your own old shirts you’d forgotten somewhere was poking out from beneath a different article. dan heng sat himself down in the centre of the futon and brought you into lap. your position was a bit awkward as you sat perpendicular across from him. both your legs went one direction while your torso was turned to face him. he sunk his head into the crook of your neck again, drawing in more, shorter inhales.

"seriously, wh—what are you doing?"

"he’s still on you." he said against your shoulder, warmth breath making you shiver. there was a slight growl in his throat again.

"even after that?" as you spoke, he tilted your head away, exposing more of your neck. "hey, w-wai—ah!" you made a cry of pain when a pair of fangs suddenly bit down into your shoulder. it wasn’t hard enough to draw much blood, but more than enough to hurt. you shuddered with some ungodly, almost harrowed noise when his tongue glided over what would blossom into a bruise. his arms and tail wound tighter around you, as if you might slip away at any second. he moved on, this time toward your jaw, peppering it with desperate kisses. you tried to say his name as he trailed down in between his own rapid-growing breaths. he was panting once he reached your shoulder, his kisses sloppy. in some work of miraculous dexterity, he had readjusted your seat on him until his waist was slotted between your legs. all the while, one hand was in your hair angling your head for his best reach, the other around your back. you had to hide your face in his hair when he had began making small vocalizations, something like tiny whines.

you said his name again, this time louder when he trailed his fangs back up your shoulder. right after he left a hot kiss on your shoulder, he bit down again. you seethed in pain, trying to push his head off, but you were only met with purrs. even though he didn’t seem fully aware of what was going on, those purrs had to be weaponized against you. he shifted to another part of your shoulder, mouthing another kiss on it, but before he could bite, you grabbed his horn.

"dan heng!" you yanked his head back, surprising him. but instead of some sort of pained cry, he let out a heady moan. to your surprise, that noise slipping from his mouth seemed to restore his lucidity in an instant. his dilated eyes shot wide open and his hands flew to cover his mouth, almost sending himself backwards in the process. his face burned with embarrassment, colouring his cheeks and pointed ears in a bright crimson. you huffed, but didn’t remove yourself from your position. in fact, you anchored yourself down by locking your ankles behind his back if he were to try and push you off.

"(y/n) to dan heng, can you hear me?" you said, almost tempted to knock on his forehead.

"i-it happened again," his voice was quiet in horror.

"hey, i need you to listen to me before you clam up on me again." you brought one hand to the side of his face, gently making him look up at you. he jumped at the contact, sending his hands further up his face until they were covering his eyes.

"please forgive me," he rushed out.

"look at me," you said softly, placing one hand on top of his to move it to the side—one of his faintly glowing eyes glanced at you. "i’m more happy to make out with you, but we need to talk first."

he made a strangled groan of embarrassment in answer, moving his hand back in place again.

"are you listening?"

he nodded.

"alright, the whole thing with jing yuan was me asking about you," you said. "i thought he might know a bit about you as a vidyadhara and your behaviour, so i went to ask what i could do to get you to let me into the archives. his idea was a less than tactful, but i guess it worked. that’s why ‘his scent was on me’, as you say. he only stuck his head on my shoulder for a bit because you’d be able to tell and then demand an explanation or something."

his fingers had parted to show his eyes again, and they were staring in bewilderment.

"so, i’m sorry for doing all that to you." your voice was soft. "i just wanted to see you."

"no, i should be apologizing. i have no control of myself and i haven’t been fair to you." he lowered his hands to hovering somewhere over his chest. "i was saying before… since that night, i have been an embarrassment. all i’ve wanted to do is steal you away and… smother you in affection until you returned it. the feeling was so intense that i didn’t trust myself around you, so i hid. i thought if i waited, it’d calm down, but it really only made it worse."

your heart swooned then and there, lighting a fire in your cheeks. "o-oh… so if i did return it, then you wouldn’t act like a lovesick ghost anymore?"

"hey." he frowned, but his face soon fell back into the same flustered expression from before. "but to answer you, maybe after a while. i could also just get worse… but i really don’t want to subject you anything you don’t want." while he couldn’t meet your gaze, he still leaned his head into the palm of your hand. with a sigh, you held his jaw and angled his face to look at you again.

"how many times do i have to say i don’t mind? you can’t seem to fit that one through that thick vidyadhara skull of yours." you did actually knock on his head this time, making him wince.

"i—i don’t know, i just get embarrassed." he hid face his face against your chest, face a shade redder and his ears drooping. "you also always look so shocked. i don’t want to do that to you."

"that’s only because you tend to forget any kind of warning," you said with a light laugh. "truly, i like it—when you give me warning, that is—because i really like you too, stupid."

his breath audibly hitched, and he raised his head back up. "t-too? but i’ve never said—"

"are you kidding? you don’t need to say it when the aeons and their grandmas know. even march says it’s obvious. you’re seriously worried about that after you’ve made out with my shoulder sloppy style? by the way, what was with the bites?"

"ngh, don’t word it like that." his tail that was still tangled around you thumped against your back indignantly. "…and the bites are a weird territorial thing. i’m sorry if they hurt." he leaned his head against you, running his thumb over one of the marks.

"dragons…" you sighed with a smile. "you’re lucky you’re so cute." you pet his hair, and he leaned into your touch.

he moved his chin so it was on your collarbone, looking up at you with softened eyes. there were almost stars of reverence in them when he gazed at you. "i love you."

"wait, wha—" you began, but he swallowed the rest of your words when his lips were upon yours. he pressed himself up against you, his hands gently holding the sides of your face. as he kissed you, there was a faint rumbling and vibration coming from his chest—he was purring.

he pulled back again, leaving you a little short of breath and a lot dazed. you’d always thought it’d be you that had to kiss him first, not the other way around. he began to leave another trail of kisses starting from your lips to your jaw, this time leading toward the other side he had already been. your hands fell from their place on him and inched onto his back while his lips were on your neck. one hand slipped into his back window, and he suddenly gasped. his back arched into you, almost knocking you over. he panicked, and his tail constricted behind you like another set of arms to catch you.

"what was that?" you laughed, trying to re-steady yourself.

"your hand was cold. i don’t know, i guess i have a sensitive back," he huffed. his ears were angled down and a flush was heavy on his face. you couldn’t really articulate what it was about him, but you were suddenly overcome with cuteness aggression. you leaned your weight onto him, sending him backwards onto the futon and—perhaps somewhat out of revenge—hovered yourself over top of his hips. he stared up at you with widened eyes and a held breath, frozen and waiting for your next move.

"you said i need to return your affection, didn’t you?"

he swallowed and nodded the tiniest bit.

"so let me have some fun too, my beloved." you placed a hand on his cheek.

"wait, you heard—i actually said that?" it almost looked like steam would start rising from the top of his head at any point.

"heard it loud and clear." you smiled to yourself, leaning down and managing to get your fingertips into his chest window—only for the door to slam wide open.

"hey, it’s dinner! what’re you two even doi—!" march called, leaning her hand on the doorway. you and dan heng leapt off each other, landing on the opposite sides of his futon. march stared in silence for a long while before lolling her head back. "jeez, finally! anyway, can you two wait until after dinner? pom-pom’s ‘bouta blow a gasket waiting for you two."

"w-we’ll be there in a minute," you said, trying to readjust your collar to try and hide dan heng’s bite marks.

"don’t be long!" march said as she strode back off down the hallway. a couple beats passed and you looked over at dan heng. by some miracle, he’d managed to swap himself back to his human look, but he still looked disheveled as he went to stand back up.

he held a hand out to you and pulled you up, pausing for a moment. he glanced at the bite marks on your shoulder that still peaked out, made some sort of strained sound and then removed his coat. "they don’t need to see that," he said as he strung it around your shoulders, fixing the collar so it hid the marks from sight.

"i’m wearing your coat. march saw us before. if she learns something, it’s guaranteed to be said," you deadpanned. "they’ll know."

instead of giving you a direct response, he took your hand in his and lead you out of the archives, looking at you with what was probably meant to be a neutral expression. his light flush and knitted eyebrows betrayed him though. "can we at least pretend we have dignity?"

"i mean, sure, but it’s not gonna do anything, looking the way we do. now c’mon, don’t wanna keep the conductor waiting." you walked off with him in tow.

he only made a small groan in response again.

#sorry for the random jerma joke at the beginning #it's a moral obligation for me #hsr x reader #hsr #honkai star rail #honkai star rail x reader #dan heng #dan heng x reader #imbibitor lunae #imbibitor lunae x reader

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dipperdesperado · 8 months

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Get Organized!

I recently made a post about how to get started in doing radical stuff. Said otherwise, that post was meant to answer the question, “Where do I go, when I know the world is fucked?” This post covers similar ground, but is more interested in the theoretical side of things. Not to say it won’t be practical. It’s just saying that if you’re not the kind of person that can read a little bit and feel confident to act, or you like having a little bit more scaffolding, that you also deserve a resource. I’m hoping to contribute to that today. As the title says, we’re going to be focusing on organizing. This is one of those things that is said a lot, but is actually defined much less often. Tangentially, you should be aware and ready for this for literally everything relating to politics. Any word that you hear used, you should always ask for a definition. Many a movement would have gone differently if folks spent more time trying to find semantic alignment. Anyway.

When I say organizing, I mean catalyzing the energy of folks, acting from a specific theory of change. A theory of change is a thought process or method to create some kind of social impact in a particular context. When the world sucks in some particular way, and you want it to stop sucking, the answer is to organize, in the way defined above. By organizing, we lean on the idea of collective power to create changes that are currently only afforded to those with authoritarian power. It’s a game of evening the odds.

I will also note that this assumes that you are going to be framing your work around broad-based movements, that have (mostly) aboveground (as in “legal”) tactics. This is not necessarily a statement of what is correct; small groups that are in concert with larger movements are also able to be successful, even when doing more confrontational tactics.

So, to organize, I’d say it would be useful to be involved in movements already. You can look at my radicalism 100 post to see how that could look. Either way you have to know what your where your niche(s) lie. In other words, what sits in the middle of the intersection between what you like to do, what you are good (or can become good/have a willingness to become good) at, and what is needed in your context. I tend to center the local level, because that is the area where influence is more tangible, and fits into how I see a resilient world coming to fruition. So, you have to ask yourself, “What can I do, that I would enjoy doing, in my community?” Then, you should find some other people who are in that same vibe. Depending on your approach, this may take no time at all, or a lot of time. I listed some ideas for finding folks in radicalism 100, but to reiterate: look for social medias and IRL presences of people who are into the same topics, and connect with them. See where you can plug in, and see where the contours of organizing in your local contexts are. Ideally you can see places where gaps can be filled.

Once you find an issue that you think has potential, and you have a couple of people to do some organizing with, you have what I think of as a catalyst group. This group is meant to start (or assist) in a certain kind of reaction, but not lead it. Trying to control movements is both futile and antithetical to liberation. So, to ground us, we have two very important ingredients: a topic/issue/area of focus to organize around, and a group of folks to work with. Once this is in place, you can co-create a strategy with your organizing team. I’d recommend employing an encircling strategy as your long-term or meta strategy, where multiple sub-strategies and campaigns happen within this frame. Essentially, this allows you to employ campaigns across a matrix of tactics. Within the encircling frame, you can create a campaign (what I consider a “short-term” strategy). Campaigns are a series of actions over time. Strategies are a series of campaigns over time.

A useful way to think of strategic planning is by separating the process into stages, grouped by movement size.

Small: Organize small actions/protests, figuring out ways to build movement visibility and interest

Medium: Focus on scaling up the participation, through mobilizing efforts. Promote your actions, get people involved, and encourage meaningful action.

Large: Create a movement. The kind of thing people hear about.

To organize on the smallest level, the easiest thing might be to just do plan actions that are well within your team’s capacity, organize those actions, and execute. If you can swing it, I’d really recommend to not lean too much into symbolic actions. There are risks with every action, no matter what legal frameworks your locality has. If you’re going to do something, you have to be very intentional with:

what you hope to accomplish through the action

a high likelihood of success for the action

doomsday planning in case something goes wrong

If you’re able to do this, then you will be leagues ahead of a lot of other folks. This is not to make it a race or a competition, but it is moreso to say you can symbolically represent and catalyze action without becoming a martyr.

As you’re doing actions, you should be refining your idea of who’s impacted by the issues more and more. As that picture gets clearer, you should spend more and more time understanding and listening to those folks. Ideally, you get to a point of co-creation, where you are enabling people to fight for themselves and build their autonomy. That is the kind of thing that prevents movements from dying. Organizers should be trying to put themselves out of business, in a sense. Catalysts should be able to come from anywhere.

To scale up, I’d recommend a focus on meeting folks. Take the ideas of deep canvassing, where you empathetically have conversations with whoever is impacted by the issue you’re responding to, through the lens of giving power to those people. Rather than asking them to feed into some established system of power, encourage them to take action into their own hands, as a collective.

I’d also recommend that as capacity grows, build a “positive” or “constructive” power. This can look like a lot of things. Whether it is a block club, neighborhood pod, community council, or community assembly, dedicate energy into creating spaces where people can start building their democratic and consensus muscles. These can simultaneously act as the training ground and alternative governance structure that allows folks to start making decisions for themselves in a very specific way.

This will ideally allow the movement to really start to be intersectional. It should be intersection minded from the outset, but that can be difficult to meaningfully actualize in the early stages of the movement. since single-issue movements are inherently brittle (if your movement revolves around getting something on a ballot, winning or losing just ends the movement)—there are throughlines that connect all movements, and those lines should be made visible and traveled. Environmentalists should fight for housing rights, LandBack, Reparations, and a host of other things. The more developed our networks, the stronger our movements will be.

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blackswan446 · 1 month

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partyisntover.

→ pairing: yan!kth x reader

→ "we could still dance"

→ wc: 1556

→ cws: drugging, kidnapping, slight sexual innuendos

→ notes: this is inspired by one of my favorite songs, specifically the first part "PartyIsntOver", it's by tyler, the creator, and i would recommend listening to (the whole song obviously cus its fire) but specifically PartyIsntOver before/while reading :) enjoy!

parties were like your safe space. it was a strange thing to say, but it was true. for some odd reason, you always felt more at home at a bustling party than your actual house. maybe it was something about the anonymity of parties, how for one night, you could become whoever you wanted, hide the vulnerable parts of yourself within the dim lights and use the alcohol as an excuse if things were to get out of hand.

or perhaps, you just liked the chaos. raised to be a good, studious girl, you didn't get out much for your entire childhood. everything was meticulous, planned out, by-the-book. there was no room for spontaneity, or a new adventure, or even a happy accident. it was nice for a while, having the assurance that nothing would ever go wrong, but after so many years of it, you grew sick of the blandness. it was then, you realized that describing your life as "calm" and "peaceful" was masking the sad reality of it: that your life was dull.

so, the second you left the house, (literally, the minute your parents drove away from your college), you went out and found something to do. that is, you walked into the first random celebration you happened upon while strolling, and you were hooked. now your life revolved around parties, and gatherings, and events, and any excuse to throw on a nice dress and do something fun with new people. and honestly? you wouldn't have it any other way. in a way, it felt as if your inner child was being healed, like you were finally fulfilling the dreams of a little girl who just wanted to have fun.

taehyung, on the other hand, hated parties. he despised the loud music, the drunk people and their sweaty bodies, thrashing around in a closed off space, forming a pit of body odor and bad decisions. not to mention the feeling of social inferiority that he felt when he was there, and the way he just stood around, drinking whatever poison was shoved into his hand by a drunk rando didn't help his case. yet he kept showing up, every single time, he always came back, for one reason.

you.

he couldn't explain it, but the two of you, you completed each other. the yin to his yang. and the two of you, together, would create the perfect balance that you needed, that he needed. hell, just looking at you, his heart was relieved of the negative emotions that came with the social ostracization. like the confidence and happiness that bloomed in your heart was sent to his, traveling by a long, invisible string connecting the two. he knew that it would take work, and the very type of meticulous planning that you grew to hate. he wasn't someone you'd even look at. but he had determination, a drive to achieve lifelong joy, the same type he felt whenever he looked at you.

of course, he had already started by removing the obvious disturbances to fate. he tore them up, burned some of them, dissolved others, and some of them he just buried. it didn't matter where they wound up, as long as they weren't stepping on the string, he didn't care. but they were all gone now, and he could undo the final loop, the one that stopped the string from drawing a straight line from you to him, the one that would finally make things so much clearer. of course, it was a little extreme, but taehyung always took precautions. he couldn't risk the string tangling up again, and how would that happen if there was nothing for it to get caught on?

spying you from across the packed room, you were holding a drink, in your element. somehow, the painful colored lights did wonders for you, the reds and blues giving your skin a purple hue. all he could do was look from the shadows, and wait to catch your eyes. and catch they did, as it was only a few minutes before they met, and with a smirk, approached you.

you could talk later, after all, you'd have all the time in the world to talk and get to know each other after tonight. for now, he just wanted to do what he had to do and get you both out of there. you smiled at him, giving him a shouted greeting. he smiled back and leaned down towards your ear. "the party isn't over yet. want to dance?" he offered, reaching out his hand to lead you to the dance floor.

you nodded, since it was too loud to give him an actual response, and took his hand. he smiled, and weaved through the mass of people holding you tight as he did so. you found yourself in a small corner of the dance floor, away from the large crowd of people in the center. you were surprised at him, since you had seen him around at a few parties, and never saw him dance or even talk to other people. but he wasted no time in grabbing your hips and swaying the both of you along with the music. not that you didn't appreciate his forwardness, you actually enjoyed it, and it didn't take long for you to follow his lead.

"good song, hm?" he asked, leaning down so far that his head was basically in the crook of your neck. you nodded shyly, the heat in your face hopefully being hidden by the colored lights. he gave a short, husky laugh in your ear, as his feet twisted up with yours. "sorry about that, i'm not the best dancer." he apologized. you smirked, turning around to face him. standing up to talk into his ear, you laughed back. "if you're such a bad dancer, then why am i out here with you?" you asked cheekily, smiling as you took a sip of your drink.

what a shame you were facing backwards that whole time. if you weren't, maybe you would've seen the little bag of white powder taehyung dumped into your drink. maybe you could've thrown out the drink, slapped him in the face, and gone home. what a damn shame.

he shrugged his shoulders. "you're taking a chance, i guess." he shouted back, grabbing your waist again and pulling you in closer to him. as your head hit his chest, you felt the room spin violently, too violently to match the level of alcohol you had drank that night. suddenly, the music felt too loud yet muffled and far away. the strobing lights were giving you a migraine, and your legs felt like wet spaghetti.

taehyung picked up on your weakness, right away, almost as if he were expecting it. "woah, okay. have a few too many, princess?" he joked, clasping his arms around you tighter. you shook your head, the idea of forming words and annunciating them too much for you to stomach. he laughed, shaking his head in amusement. "come on, you, let's get you out of here. come on." he told you, reaching his arm under your knees and scooping you off your legs, your drink falling from your limp hands and its contents spilling out onto the floor.

you tried to shake your head more, tell him you were okay, but your movement was too weak as everything in your line of vision began to bleed into one another. he laughed again, as he moved his way through the crowd, you heard the noise of the party fade away, the sound of his voice now amplified in your ears. it was only now that you could hear the darkness in his voice, finally being unveiled as the street lights shined above you.

"god, i can't wait to get you home. we're going to have some fun, aren't we?" he murmured, hands digging further into your legs as he struggled to open the door to his car. that was enough to send you into an adrenaline overdrive, shooting your head up as he laid you gently on the car seats. "huh?!" you sputtered, trying to grab for anything you could to fight back.

"i said, 'your night out is done'. you're drunk, sweetheart, you need to go to sleep, okay? just shut your eyes." he pleaded, standing in between your legs as he stroked your cheek softly. you shook your head, weakly, but you still did it, trying to kick your legs to get him away. he grabbed your calves, stilling the thrashing motions. "stop it. i need to bring you home." he growled, "i'm doing this because i love you."

you looked around helplessly as you struggled to comprehend what he said. "what?" you choked, as he shut the back door and got into the driver's seat. "nothing, princess. just go to sleep. it'll all be good when you wake up, okay?" he comforted, starting the ignition and driving away from the bustling house.

you could feel the strands of consciousness slip out of your hands, and felt yourself falling into the abyss of something deeper than sleep. the last remnants of a thought that you could piece together were ones of panic, and the last thing you could see as your eyes fell shut, was taehyung's glare in the rearview mirror.

#bts #bts fanfiction #bts x reader #yandere bts #yandere bts x reader #yandere taehyung x reader #yandere taehyung #taehyung x reader #bts fanfic #yandere #yandere v #kim taehyung x reader #fanfic #bts fic #yandere x reader

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aures-fantasy-nook · 2 years

Text

HP characters when their s/o's tired

DISCLAIMER: I do not support JK Rowling :)

also! accepting requests so please send them. drabble or headcanon requests prefered but if something perks my interest you might get more lmao- anyways this took so long, lmk if you want any other characters you want for this

Lightning Era:

Harry

honestly clueless

kid wasn't socialized at a young age

basically you either have to be asleep or tell him

lets say you fall asleep on him

freezes

harry.exe has stopped working

honestly tho he's probably vaguely confused

like he was just having a conversation with you

and now you're asleep??

heh??

next thing running through his mind is how cute you are

i mean he mainly sees you during like class and stuff

rarely does he see you as relaxed as you are asleep

he's kinda in love or something idk

looks to Hermione for help

she doesn't help him at all

eventually shakes you awake

makes you go to bed earlier than him tho

makes sure you get there safely

honestly thinks about the situation for the next week

at some point tells you that you can sleep on him whenever

#--#

Ron

another clueless boy

honestly no ones fault except for his

he’s just Ronald what else can I say

anyways

someone probably points it out that you're asleep

that someone is probably Hermione

kid doesn't even know what to do

like stares and kind of zones out

will wake you up

probably kind of makes fun of you

I mean kid comes from a big household of course he does

jokes about how late you stay up like he doesn't also stay up late

if you get pouty he'll melt and like escort you back to his dorm

i guess you're both skipping class

#--#

Hermione

the best one here

knows all of the signs of you getting tired

immediately suggests you go take a nap if possible

if you randomly get tired like midday?

she's checking in on you in between classes

will share notes with you if you're too tired to take them

only if she knows you got a good nights sleep the night before

or were up like her studying or working on essays

work is always an excuse for tiredness

will give you power snacks

if you're a coffee drinker-

will let you drink coffee later than usual only to stay awake

she usually cuts you off at lunch :(

overall she's supportive and here to help

unless you stayed up doing something dumb, you're on your own then :))

#--#

Draco

notices and literally does nothing /j

for real though he won't like make a big deal out of it or anything

if you guys are in class he'll notice but not

makes sure to make an extra copy of notes for you though

if its just like at the dining hall or like in the common room tho

he's nicer when you guys are more secluded

will like push your head on his shoulder or like tell you to sleep on him

might lightly scold you

but overall very sweet about everything

if its late he'll straight up just take you to his dorm to go to bed

like he changes and has some of your pj's in his room

pretty much cuddle town

he might read to you and play with your hair if he's not super tired

that's the real treat tbh

#--#

Fred

this mf

honestly mean about it

will 100% make fun of you

you cannot tell me that this boy wouldn't

he might be cute but he's an asshole

especially during classes

he will throw paper balls at you if he notices you dozing off

will not help you with academics at all

if you miss it you miss it ig

if you guys are in the common room he's nicer

will sneak you coffee out of the kitchens

doesn't really like to cuddle during the day

yk he has too many pranks to pull and plan

but he will let you like cuddle him while he plans with George

I feel like if its late though he'll not hesitate to sleep

like I feel like once he gets tired he's gone

so if your both tired be happy cause you're getting your way :)

#--#

George

he's nicer than his brother but not that nice

will still mock you but if he sees you getting tiredly upset??

its over- he's done teasing and he's hugging you

will be the type to drop everything and nap with you

if you're tired during classes?

he's carrying your books

making sure you're staying awake

at least enough to be able to do the homework later

he's honestly really sweet about stuff

will let you skip dinner to nap and then bring you food later

or maybe even sneak you into the kitchen later

also if you're a coffee addict

like myself

best boyfriend ever

will give you coffee and makes it perfectly every time

doesn't have the heart to cut you off at anytime

honestly though I love him a lot :)

#--#

Oliver

this little shit

omg

he really needs to not

he's one of those people who like never sleeps but is never tired

just because he's so busy

like mans is a good student

he's also committed his life to quidditch so

he doesn't get much sleep

will often make you stay up with him

and then gets confused as to why you're tired

literally does not have a single clue

he will get you coffee if you want it

he likes to do things for you so he babys you when you're tired

another one that carries your stuff for you

wont let you slack off though

you're doing all of your own work

but of course he'll help you, he just might give you shit for it

overall sweet but clueless

#harry potter x reader #ron weasley x reader #hermione granger x reader #draco x reader #fred weasley x reader #george weasley x reader #oliver wood x reader #draco malfoy x reader #aure writes

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thenightfolknetwork · 21 days

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I am an antichrist.

The Real thing, born to a seventh virgin daughter after her soul was consumed by my father, Satan, in a ritual of fire, glory and light.

I was raised as instructed by The Book— Don't ask which Book, you don't want to know, the knowledge would melt your eardrums— to be the destroyer of the world, the prince of sins and the devourer of souls. I am the One Who Will Bring Fire to the earth, I am the One who will run the blood of innocents through the streets and boil the sea with my mere desire, I am the dark side of the moon, I am humanity's nightmare, I am—

I am 12 years old.

And I'm at school.

I just learned about ecosystems: The delicate balance of a food chain, the harmony that exists in the earth when a network of fungi extracts nitrogen from the earth and a rotting tree leaves the soil rich for next spring.

I found out about corals recently too. They are alive and an extremely complex life form for something that will never move, corals don't die as long as nothing kills them, isn't that a strange and wonderful concept?

I always wanted to be the World Destroyer.

It never occurred to me that bringing hell to earth would mean no deer or bees or coyotes.

If you increase the average sea temperature by more than two degrees, millions of corals will die. I don't know if I want to boil the sea if that's the end result.

But I am the Antichrist and I like being the Antichrist. I like to be Apotheosis, the crack in the glass, the rotten apple, the mercury in the water.

But I also like the world as it is, even if it doesn't bow down to me in fear.

What do I do?

(What do I say to my father?)

This is the problem with prophecies – they always put the subject under such a tremendous amount of pressure! I feel sure that, if your father had simply not mentioned his plans for your future, you would have grown up without these anxieties and likely gone on to fulfil your unholy purpose without a second thought, in a time frame that felt sensible and natural to you.

Instead, you've been burdened with a terrible and unreasonable amount of responsibility. No wonder you're feeling torn! This is more than any twelve year old should have to consider.

The important thing to remember is that you don't have to make a decision about this right away. You are the Antichrist and you will remain the Antichrist while you take a little while to decide the best course of action for you. The end of the world will still be there when you're ready for it.

As to the apocalypse itself, this is the other reason prophecies can be so frustrating. They are simply never specific enough to be helpful. Yes, you may be destined to end the world – but which world, exactly? And how much of that 'blood of innocents, boiling seas' stuff is literal, and how much is just a religious scribe getting carried away with himself?

In my experience, there are many, many ways a person might fulfil a prophecy without having to bring a fiery demise to this particular realm of existence. You might take a short hop over to another reality and destroy an uninhabited world, for example.

Alternatively, you might take your prophecy in a more metaphorical sense. “The world” we live in today is one that allows billionaires and business magnates destroy our environment in the name of profit. Perhaps you could fulfil your great purpose by destroying the social and political structures that make that world possible.

I understand your trepidation about bringing this up with your father. However, I really do think that you should consider it. Looking after you is his job, after all, and I'm sure he wouldn't want you struggling with these feelings alone. Reach out to him, and let him know how you feel.

You don’t have to decide this all at once. Whatever else you say to your father, you need to make it clear that you will not be embarking on any sort of apotheosis until you've at least finished your GCSEs. You are a child, and you deserve to have a proper childhood, whatever the future might hold for you.

#answered #the nightfolk network #monstrous agonies

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mcytblr-archive · 1 month

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Early MCYTblr Interviews: kermiekermie

today's interviewee is @kermiekermie, who ran "Friend or Host", was a part of the "Block Men Simps" group chat, and has generally been an active member of MCYTblr for a long time! below is a transcript of the questions and answers.

Q: What was your general experience in MCYTblr? Does anything stand out to you immediately?

A: I think my general experience on mcytblr was pretty positive compared to some peoples. The one thing that really stands out is how young I was- i was 11 when i joined mcytblr in early-mid 2020. That didnt really change the way people treated me aside from the occasional teasing and babying, but I did make it a point to say I didn't want to be treated differently. Mcytblr was not my first time in a fandom space and I knew how to avoid creeps already so I never really had any truly negative experiences, honestly the only annoying things that happened were being banned from discords and blocked by people due to my age (which was completely understandable). The biggest memory I have of mcytblr is of course the Block Men Simps group chat, and the original members of the group chat are really the only tumblr mutuals I still keep up with (snail actually has my snapchat!) I still kind of view them as a sort of family, and they were there for me in what I consider an extremely low point of my life and really helped me take my mind off things. During quarantine, I didnt have any of my irls numbers or socials and my mom had just been diagnosed with breast cancer, so I quite literally NEVER left the house and tumblr was really the only social interaction I got for a solid year. And while that definitely impacted my social development (i still cant start a conversation with someone irl without feeling nauseous and shaky) i'm very grateful I had people to talk to throughout that.

Q: I understand that you were the one who set up "Friend or Host". What was the process of organizing a fandom event like that like?

A: Friend or host . god. Like I said, I was 11-12 throughout the majority of my time on mcytblr, and I had ZERO experience organizing anything and I had very little help from anyone else. I tried to make it work the best I could and got creative, but overall I don't think it was a very big success. Funnily enough, not everyone who participated in FOH knew my age and one of the winners actually blocked me afterwards they found out, which I still giggle about today.

Q: How did Friend or Host go?

A: I don't think FOH necessarily went bad, but if I had a little more help and better organization skills and planned it out further ahead of time, I think it would've gone better. It was still fun and I had a good time either way, but I can admit it was a little messy.

Q: What major events in the fandom do you remember? (Either from the MCYTers themselves or fandom-specific!)

A: Honestly, my memory of my time in the wider mcytblr community isnt all that great and I tend to get timelines a little messed up, but i DO remember being there for the creation of the original dreamceler copypasta. In the BMS group chat we were having our normal conversation and someone oncest got brought up at the same time as dream somehow, and thus Ginger wrote the extremely cursed dreamceler copypasta. This eventually evolved into an entire universe (the dreamceler cinematic universe?) with various different copypastas that eventually had to be archived because of how out of hand it got. Sometimes I still see the copypastas floating around and it kind of freaks me out every time. I also have a veryyyy vivid memory of the time I made the 2020 mcytblr election discord read OmegaNotFound on wattpad (do NOT research. for your own safety) and it was really amusing seeing everyones reactions.

Q: Do you remember any of the "kinnie" blogs?

A: oh MY the kinnie blogs!! i actually have dms with a couple of them plotting little jokes and such and I got involved with them quite often!! i actually ran a justaminx one for a couple days (yikes) and it wasnt really that believeable looking back. me and ginger as well as a couple other mooties loved spamming the ask boxes of them with piss jokes and such, and I feel like we played a pretty big role in how widespread and popular kinnie blogs became.

Q: What was the "Kroger Anon"?

A: oh my dearest kroger anon how I miss you…. I still dont know who the kroger anon actually WAS, but they would send rainbow colored advertising messages about Kroger to various mcytblr blogs at random intervals. Funny thing is, I dont live near any krogers and have never been to one in my life, but the anon messages kinda made me want to go. I miss kroger anon…. kroger anon if youre reading this come home please..

Q: What were common in-jokes in the fandom of that time? (Copypastas, headcanons, rumors, etc)

A: Common in-jokes is a hard one!! like i said earlier, my memory of my time in mcytblr isnt all that great or extensive and I could probably better answer this if I went through my archive but alas, I do not have the patience for that. Obviously we had the good ole tapeworm and pregnancy posts, dreamceler, and various other cursed copypastas and memes. One inside joke between the block men simps gc was "thinkign 👽" which came from a typo snail made that just kind of caught on and we would use every once in a while to giggle at. Other than that, I can't really think of any specific inside jokes.

Q: Is there anything else you remember or would like to talk about?

A: Something I really want to talk about is how much lurking I did!! on the outside I was definitely a normal parasocial mcytblr blog but I lurked on pretty much every corner of the fandom you could really think of. Obviously I have a ton of critblr and other controversial mutuals but I never really openly interacted with that side of mcytblr since it was pretty heavily debated and I am nothing if not conflict avoidant. I also did quite a bit of truthing that no one ever really mentioned which I guess I sort of appreciate. I think being in a fandom that involved actual real people ar that age for that long kind of screwed with me, and ive never really been able to be in a fandom for a piece of actual fiction because theyve just never gotten my interest in the same way, I guess. Even now, i was in grouptwt for quite a while (tgc podcast) and now im active on kpoptwt, which again, both of those fandoms are for actual real people. I dont think its the parasocial aspect either, ive never been super parasocial and have never had a problem criticizing the content creators I watch. Im really grateful for all the people I met on mcytblr, but I think the actual dream smp and the way I engaged with content overall negatively impacted how I interact with things now.

#early mcytblr interviews #Volume 15 #kermiekermie

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arlo-venn · 25 days

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An abridged rundown of what’s been happening at home:

Tyrell is highly codependent and I am highly independent. For the few years I’ve lived here I’ve been very sick and in survival mode and had lost the majority of my friends when I became homeless, so I was around a lot for a long time. I got my gallbladder out, and am now less sick— I reconnected with a few old friends (not ones that left during homelessness) and started getting out and socializing more again. That’s when this all started. I was spending too much time with my friend Ellil, dropping things when she needs help and going to her (I will not be shamed for this), etc. She feels like I abandon her but we literally live together and do everything together so how am I supposed to leave the house at all without “abandoning” her??

Then, I met a girl and now she’s my girlfriend. Things really ramped up then. It was scaring me— I told her I needed to prioritize exploring this relationship and rebuilding my friendships and getting back out into society. I asked for space. I kindly and gently told her she was scaring me, reminded her that I have related traumas from previous abusive relationships and informed her that the way she was behaving around this stuff was pushing big trigger buttons. It didn’t stop. She guilts the hell out of me any time I leave the house. When I’m hanging out with her I can’t even get up to use the bathroom or go to the kitchen without her being like WHERE ARE YOU GOING!? and if I need to go lay down bc I am obviously very chronically ill, I’m guilted for that too. She has called me a bad friend and a shitty friend. She says I said that about myself and she is just agreeing. I did not say that about myself. I don’t think taking care of myself and prioritizing myself makes me a bad friend. I don’t think needing space makes me a bad friend. I don’t think me wanting time to explore a new relationship and spend time with people that I love outside of the house makes me a bad friend. I invite her all the time. She doesn’t want to come.

Then, I won my disability case, and everything ramped up to 100. I think she’s scared of me not Needing her anymore, of me acquiring the ability to leave here, when the money comes. She’s convinced herself that I’m obsessed with my gf. I’m not. I’ve talked to all of my other close friends about that to get their input, and not a single one of them shares that opinion. She just feels like I am bc it hurts her every time I mention her.

The more intense this gets, the more distant I become. The more distant I become, the more intense it gets. But on top of it all I cannot stop accepting financial help from her bc I don’t have the option to yet. And she never for even a second takes a moment to consider the power imbalance in this relationship or how that might affect the discussions around this.

I told her that her interpretation of my feelings around my gf were incorrect, and she told me I was gaslighting her bc she’s “witnessed it.” Thomasine said something about how I don’t let them know when I’m going to be leaving the house or coming back or how long I’ll be gone and that really freaked me out. I’m a 30 year old adult woman person. I am not the romantic partner of these people. They are my friends. I don’t have to report my comings and goings to them. I won’t do it. We literally have life360. I couldn’t even if I wanted to, I don’t make plans in advance I play my days by ear— it’s all very spontaneous bc I can’t predict what’s going to be going on with my body, you know? And all my friends operate that way, too. I’m not doing anything wrong.

I’m scared. I can’t continue the conversation because I don’t have anything to say that she’s going to want to hear which is what makes her communication turn toxic and immensely triggering for me. I’m not just gonna be like “you’re right I suck I will spend more time at home with you and I will like my girlfriend less for your comfort” and anything short of that is going to be unsatisfying to her. It was so bad yesterday that I fled with Arlo. I had to come back. I have to be here for now. But I need to leave. This is not healthy and I’m scared.

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breitzbachbea · 4 months

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Help me, I'm Holding On For Dear Life

So. For the past few days, I have spent an inconsolable amount of hours annoying @someone-you-do-not-know with an AU idea: Alternative history, some world that resembles the late 18th and early 19th century. I'm mostly concerned with social rules and etiquette around marriage and love. Michele and Harry have been happily courting each other for a year, only waiting to get the go-ahead from Michele's parents to make it all official. Suddenly, out of the blue, it is announced to Michele that his father has betrothed him to Antonio, the son of a count. Invited to the wedding and arriving for the engagement and to assist with the wedding are Michele's relatives, the Vargas family. Which is how Lovino finds himself his cousin's best man and soon the confidante of his fiancé. Literally NO ONE is happy with this arrangement.

TLDR: SicIre in a Romeo and Juliette bind, Spamano as pining idiots with only themselves to blame, SpaSic as the arranged marriage that causes the predicament in the first place. And you all should totally listen to the Stage Musical Version of El Tango De Roxanne and feel Harry's and Lovino's pain as you read this.

Here's the fic - enjoy!

"I hate –" Lovino said.

" – this display,“ Harry got out through gritted teeth.

~*~

Certainly, Charlie was right that this was masochism right now. “And now Frecky, what you were into when you were in bed with Michele is none of my business, but … this isn’t it, is it now?”

It was easier to bear now, in a way. To see Michele look with a certain fondness at Antonio. Hear him laugh at whatever jokes the idiot made. Harry knew it wasn’t forever, since he intended to keep the promise he’d given Michele and he knew Michele knew that. The plan to elope with was all that occupied him in every minute he could spare and also any that he couldn’t. This wasn’t forever. This was an act. See! Antonio leant in for a kiss and Michele leant away.

Afterwards he shyly batted his eyelashes. Oh, how he wished he could see him and he didn’t have to hide away in the rafters. But such was the lot; any contact was forbidden, any trace of their relationship that had been so publicly obvious to anyone who laid eyes upon them now nothing but a whisper.

It did pain him. Charlie was right. But he couldn’t help it – hadn’t been able to help it since the first moment. He still remembered being there on their engagement night. Hidden away in the crowd but in the room nonetheless, thanks to Charlie’s connections and ability to charm people. That engagement night was seared into his mind’s eye. Sometimes, when he laid awake at night with adrenaline pumping through his veins, he remembered it and saw red.

His Michele. His beloved, witty, spirited, wicked in the best of ways Michele in his best suit, a smile on his face he could never keep for long. At the side of this trumped up, pomped up, happy-go-lucky Count’s son. So proud and so regal to have some half-forgotten city nobility hang off his arm – and who wouldn’t when it had a face like this! A voice like this that had serenaded Harry, not this peacock! An elegance that even made the suit that could not hold a candle to half the guests in the room look as if it was fine silk! Stolen valour it was, all this prick had to do was rich and have a title that Michele’s father wanted!

He had done nothing to earn Michele’s laugh, but now he got to hear it. His dark chuckle, not that high, ringing tone that was Michele’s earnest laughter, of course. Still, to see it and not hear it over the people had been enough to make Harry’s heart sink into his guts. This Antonio had done nothing to deserve it, but he was the one to hold Michele’s hand in his grasp. To gently stroke it while he looked him in the eyes and Harry had felt his limbs gone numb.

He had lifted his hand and put it on Michele’s cheek, a touch that Harry was so familiar with that he could feel it on his own hand and it made his arm tremble. To see Antonio lean close to Michele, his cheek brushing with the other’s – it had driven Harry insane that he could not see what the rest of his face was doing. Whether he was whispering something in Michele’s ear, Harry suddenly was able to remember every single innuendo, love confession and line of poetry he had ever whispered to Michele, or to have his lips brush against Michele’s soft cheek, his own caressed by Michele’s hair –

Harry had been overcome with rage. Every single muscle in his body had tightened up, a heat stoked in the depth of his guts that boiled his brain in rage. A careless whisper, a thoughtless provocation – in this moment he had been ready to kill Antonio. Anything to make this farce stop. Anything to vanish the mockery of his love, a mockery that was sold to him as exaltation of it all and only he could see it as the counterfeit it was, everyone else dazzled by the fool’s gold. Anything to prevent the doom that was the thought of never, ever again getting to experience the treasure that Antonio was holding. It was more than he could stand.

That was the engagement night. Now, as he watched them from the rafters, his emotions didn’t run as high. This wasn’t for forever – still, reassurance would be nice as he looked onto the couple. If only Michele, after he kissed Antonio on the cheek, could spot him and blow a kiss his way. Anything to satisfy the beast within him with its murmur of doubt that it was for forever. That the way Michele sometimes looked at Antonio was not a shade of the love he had for Harry, but the growing bud of passion.

No, his Michele would never betray him. He knew how much Harry loved him and he’d never throw that away. That had to suffice as Harry slipped into the shadows.

~*~

“Do you want a glass of sherry, Lovi? I heard it’s lovely,” Feliciano asked as Lovino was staring grimly at Antonio and their cousin.

“No, thanks,” Lovino said without facing his brother.

“Uh … anything else you might need?”

“Nothing.”

Feliciano sighed and sat down next to him. “Really nothing? Not thinking of anything that could cheer you up right now?”

“Nothing short of that pest being hit by lightning,” he said and it was hard to get the words through his tensed jaw. Oh, Antonio was in a good mood, wasn’t he? Made Michele laugh again – or rather, Michele laughed along out of kindness, as that duplicitous snake surely would have put it – and leant in for another kiss that was denied to him even mid-laugh.

“Man, do you think there’s something in the attic?” Feliciano said with an confused and annoyed expression towards the ceiling and Lovino finally turned to him.

“Huh?”

“Nothing, I just thought I heard something stomping overhead. Probably imagining things.”

“Huh. Probably.” He couldn’t help it, he had to look back towards the couple. Antonio still had his arm around Michele who didn’t even acknowledge it. Water from a stone would have been easier for Antonio than love from his fiancé, but of course he couldn’t say that. At least not in front of all these people. Sycophants, all of them, and he was one due to peer pressure. Michele made a match that made everyone green with envy and he looked into his wineglass and twirled it as if he wanted to drown himself in it. And still, Antonio’s arm around his waist.

“Feli, do you think this is fair?”

“Huh? What, Lovino?”

“Do you think it’s fair that Michele, who doesn’t got half the shit to his name that we do, gets to marry a future count? That I’m made to play best man instead of taking care of my own future wedding with someone who deserves me?” As much as he wanted to simmer in his own rage and let it be fuelled by the event in front of his eyes, he did turn sensible and to his brother.

“Well … yeah, I don’t think it’s fair,” Feliciano said. “Between you and him, it should be you engaged to someone like Antonio. Seriously, sometimes I wonder if Mamma is right and Uncle Salvatore is blackmailing Fernando or something.”

“Quite right! It should be me!” Lovino said and downed the rest of his wine in one. “I should be engaged – I should be married! To a count! A duke! Not play Michele’s best man! Not always have to hear ‘Oh, congratulations on Feliciano’s match, where are your plans? Gonna have to work hard to trump your brother, won’t you, Lovino?’ And then that laughter! I loathe the laughter! They can all shove it up their ass, for all I care!” He glared at his wineglass. “I changed my mind about the sherry.”

“I don’t think I should get you sherry anymore,” Feliciano responded. He winced when Lovino glared at him, but quickly found his tongue again: “I’m sure it’s just a matter of time. Mamma is of the same mind as you, so you’re gonna have a wedding that puts both me and Michele to shame!” He grinned, so reassuringly and confident that Lovino wished he could smile. But it was easy for Feliciano to believe that everything would fall into his lap. Lovino himself had always worked hard to keep that illusion for him.

A ruckus from the betrothed table – oh dear Lord, it looked like someone should have told Antonio no to the sherry as well. Lovino was about to down the whole barrel to make the view bearable. Michele, pulled into Antonio’s lap, hands on his shoulders to save some distance for his modesty’s sake. He looked genuinely surprised by this – well, maybe if Lovino didn’t have to spend most evenings with either of the sadsacks, mostly Antonio though, Michele wouldn’t be so surprised at his fiancé’s touch. And Antonio wouldn’t have to resort to desperate measures like stroking his face gently with his fingertips, obviously negotiating a kiss with his big, green eyes and that sweet and excited smile on his face.

Michele shook his head. Lovino’s hands balled into a fist.

Antonio cocked his head and said something else and Michele sighed.

“Where’s that fucking sherry,” Lovino asked and pulled his chair back, got to his feet wit his eyes still on that ghastly spectacle of the kiss. Pity kiss it was, for both of them, but neither of them knew that. Sure, Michele thought he was kissing Antonio out of pity, but he still thought that the other was naïve enough to fall in love with him. As if he was the hot commodity, he thought himself to be. As if he was deserving of all of this. If he was, then so was Lovino! Tenfold! A hundredfold!

“Look, they’re playing again! Come on Lovino, let’s find someone to dance with!” Feliciano grabbed his brother’s arm. “Let’s show them how it’s done!” He grinned and Lovino was somewhat soothed in his rage.

Until there was a tap on his shoulder. Unorthodox and plump way to ask him, really, what oaf was this impatient and –

He turned around and nearly jumped back into Feliciano when he found himself faced with Antonio himself.

“Did I scare you? I’m so sorry, Vino!” Antonio laughed, sheepishly but heartily. His face was tinted red with blush, the sherry’s work, surely. Not Michele’s. Not Lovino’s …

“Vino?” Feliciano asked and Lovino could hear that curious smile in his brother’s voice, not to mention could feel Feliciano lean onto him. Alright, enough of that all.

“Man, get it together!” Lovino told Antonio. “First that shameless display with Michele, then calling me nicknames – Only because your dad’s not around doesn’t mean you need to be embarrassing.”

“Ah, yes, I guess that’s right,” Antonio said. “But … no one’s parents are around! No chaperones tonight, so let’s live a little, we deserve it, don’t we! You, too, Lovino!”

“I’m enjoying myself, thank you very much,” Lovino responded staunchly.

“Did you come to ask Lovino for a dance?” Feliciano asked and there went that staunchness.

“Oh, no, I didn’t,” Antonio answered.

“Quite right!” Lovino answered, but Feliciano was convinced to dig a deeper grave for him:

“Aww, you should. No chaperones around and all! I bet everyone would be jealous of you two!”

Through gritted teeth, he managed to murmur out: “Feli, quit talking.”

“I bet, but I don’t want to hog Lovino’s fun.” He leant closer to Lovino and put his hand in front of his mouth. “Actually, I just wanted to tell you that you don’t need to wait on me or Michele tonight, we’ll spend the night together. I thought a notice would be courteous, since you always keep us such good company – no need for it tonight. Please, enjoy yourself.”

A kick in the face would have been kinder. “S-Sure,” Lovino said. “Yeah.” He cleared his throat. “Thanks for the heads up. Finally, some time to myself!”

Antonio put his hands on his shoulders and smiled gratefully at him. “You deserve it, really. I don’t know how I deserve your help, I am in so much debt to you.” His smile grew. “Now! Let’s find a dancing partner, will you!” He patted his shoulder before he turned, doubtlessly to return to Michele.

Feliciano blew out a sigh. “You sit around and talk with him all the time, seriously, he should marry you and not Michele.”

“Will you shut up?!” Lovino asked and whirled around. Feliciano wasn’t much impressed, the pout on his face matching his voice.

“I mean it! It’s like he’s leeching off of all your hard work!”

“I’m not doing this because I want Michele’s fiancé! I’m just doing it because Papà asked me to! And I don’t need to – Whatever! I’m going home!” Lovino turned around and headed for the door.

“Lovi! Come on! I’m sorry, if it’s what I said!” Feliciano hurried after him while he stomped off. "Don’t let that ruin your night! Let’s dance! Drink! You have no obligations tonight!”

“Yeah, like the non-obligation of staying here!” He ripped the door open.

~*~

Outside were two hooded figures, a few meters from the entrance but still within the gates. They seemed to be arguing.

“Are you sure your ankle’s fine?”

“Yeah! I just … maybe the fall wasn’t as well-calculated as it should have been …”

“Good, because I’m not getting Paddy! Or carrying you!”

“Good, because I don’t need it! Let’s just – “

“Who the hell are you?” Lovino asked and the two jumped. For a moment they faced him and he looked into two very pale, very freckled faces. Jesus, he had never seen someone with eyebrows this big on either of them.

“Isn’t this the country ball of the count?” The slightly taller one asked – a man, thinner than the other one. He lacked a tooth.

“Private event, I’m afraid,” Lovino said.

“How did you even get past the gates?” Feliciano asked.

“Aww, darn it,” said the other one, apparently a young woman. “Thought there’d be fun to have. Well, then we’ll be on our merry way! Goodbye, gentlemen!” She turned to go, but he seemed suddenly transfixed by whatever was going on inside. “Harry?”

Lovino made the mistake to look over his shoulder.

Of course, there they were. Antonio, who turned around, Michele at his hand, to lead him to the dancefloor. That bright and expectant, hopeful, delusional smile on his face as Michele chuckled and cocked his head. He briefly kissed Antonio’s hand before they parted to take their positions.

“Harry, come on, we’ve got to go.” She took the man’s arm and he looked to the ground, brows still furrowed and a frown on his parted lips. As if he was a mirror to Lovino’s emotions.

Lovino shook his head. The figures were already hurrying towards the gate.

“Strange …” Feliciano said.

“I don’t know, maybe they were beggars or something,” Lovino said. “Or some jealous pricks that didn’t get invited. Who cares? They’re gone. And so am I.”

“Aw, come on, Lovino – “

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ja3gerb0mbb · 4 months

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bloodsucker chapter 15: reconciliation

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word count: 3.3k

content warnings: none

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

“jean, i think i might actually die,” i threw my fists onto my eyes; applying pressure to them. as if i wasn’t drowning in schoolwork before; i was now with the extra four classes i took on. making up work for the content i missed meant that i barely had time for any form of social life.

he looked up from his textbook, “well, this is what you get for trying to finish two years of college in one.” for the past few weeks, jean had become my rock. the confidant i could tell all my vampire problems to. he also made a good study partner because he didn’t bother me as i worked. “yeah, i know.”

the visit with grisha was still fresh in my mind. like it was just yesterday eren and i went to the mansion. my anxiety was topped with the end of the semester work. it was easy to run away to germany with eren; but the reality of getting there was back-breaking. eren only had to take a couple extra classes to finish by the end summer, but i had to double it.

on the drive home that night, we figured we might as well get our degrees. even though we truly didn’t need them; it felt like the right way to tie up our lives here with. at least, at the time it seemed like a smart choice. “i can’t believe you guys are really doing this, though,” jean grabbed my attention back, closing his book as i shut off my laptop. a quick break won’t hurt anyone.

“i can’t either. but we’ve got it all planned out.” a smile i couldn’t hide appeared on my face. thinking of the life i had ahead with eren made all the work worth it. i knew the fear of grisha would follow us; but we hoped he himself wouldn’t. “did you plan to leave all of us behind?” jean joked, but his face was concerned.

i laughed at him, “no, we planned that too. as long as grisha is away from shiganshina, it’s easy enough to visit you guys. and my dad.” with zeke as our ‘mole’ everything worked out perfectly. too perfectly. eren kept telling me i was paranoid; maybe i should start listening to him. i hoped the nerves would start to settle after finalizing the move.

his mood perked up instantly, “wait really?” his voice had gone a bit higher. i nodded my head. “i’m just glad you’re happy. eren too. i watched as vampirism took over his life, i was worried it would happen with you,” his features dipped back into a twinge of sadness. memories haunted both of us.

but jean was right. i was happy like this. it might’ve been eren, or the vampirism, but it didn’t matter. i adjusted well and quickly, the amplified changes made everything easier. it was comforting having eren go through it with me. he made the biggest difference. sometimes i felt like nothing was even real; like i was in a coma and this was all just a dream.

the door to my room swung open with a loud thud, drawing me out of my thoughts, “hey slut!” connie squealed, pitching his voice to sound like a girl. he jumped from his spot in the doorframe, tackling my sitting body to the floor completely.

i was aware of the pressure his body weight put on me, but it didn’t register as being painful. “do you really have to tackle me every time you see me?” i complained. he lifted himself above me, extending his arms to read my face, “course i do!” he said it like it was obvious.

sasha stood a few paces behind us, “we’re going to the beach,” she interrupted, high pitch in her tone. in a swift movement connie jumped off of me, standing on his own feet again. going over to jean, he ruffled his hair, earning a hard slap to the arm from him, “cut it out,” jean bit.

they didn’t distract me for long, “no way, we’re literally balls deep in finals.” the workload was so heavy, i don’t think i could even have fun without feeling guilty about it. i really am starting to regret this. connie started snickering, “your boyfriend’s waiting in the car.” he continued to torment me with kissing noises; but the mention of eren was all i needed to ditch my studies.

“kay, fine, but we can’t stay long,” i heaved a sigh, showing dramatics to guilt trip sash and connie. jean gave a light hearted scoff, “what were you saying about finals?” rolling my eyes, i hit his shoulder hard as i quickly leapt up from my spot on the hard floor.

i didn’t wait for any of them to catch up as i made my way down the apartment complex; running towards eren’s car as soon as i spotted it. throwing the car door open, i all but jumped in, skipping over the center console to be closer to eren.

eren’s face lit up, eyes glinting. he pushed my body back slightly with the force of his own, cupping my face as he pressed a kiss into my lips. i melted into him easily; the feeling of eren comfortably familiar now. he opened his mouth wide, trying to suck as much of me in as he could. a smile tugged on my lips at his desperation, causing him to pull back.

he scanned my face, then trailed down my body. making sure i was still in tact, “i missed you so much, pretty.” he pulled my face to him again, placing a soft kiss on my forehead. i couldn’t hold back my giggle; just happy to see him, “stop with the pet names,” i complained but the butterflies were strongly present in my stomach. i couldn’t wipe the smile off my face, either.

a shuffling in the back seat caused my head to turn. i faced armin, features slightly scrunched in awkwardness. i looked away, hiding my embarrassment, “sorry armin, didn’t even know you were here,”

eren laughed viciously, “armin don’t pull the uncomfortable act, you were doing the same with annie.” armin’s face lit up a bright red, his eyes going wide. “what? no- i wasn’t!” he tripped over his words; trying to profess an innocence i didn’t have to see to know was false. “okay, freak your shit armin,” i butted in, watching his face turn impossibly redder.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

jean waved a bucket of fries in my face, “you sure you don’t want any?” i pulled my body away from the stench, further into eren's body. his legs closed around my torso, holding me tighter at my movement. “it’s really not funny,” i pushed jean’s hand away. armin and mikasa were huddled on a different set of blankets, exchanging a look at my refusal.

it was moments like this that proved to me it was a good idea to run away with eren. our closest friends were already getting suspicious of my behavior. eren stroked through my hair with his fingers; futile as the wind kept blowing it in every direction.

mikasa shivered, “why the hell did we go to the beach, anyway?” her teeth jittered lightly. i was thankful my body kept me from feeling most of the chill. eren pointed to the shoreline; where sasha and connie splashed each other in the ocean, “it was connie’s idea.”

“we need to stop listening to him,” armin's head shook. mikasa raised the bottle of vodka in her hand and took another shot from it. she extended it to me after. i stared at it for a few seconds before looking over at eren. he had a small smirk on his face; knowing i would never get drunk again. despite that fact, i raised it to my lips and took a long swallow from the bottle.

the liquid was warm going down my throat. but only for a second as my body seemed to neutralize the heat. the normally sour sting of vodka was amplified; almost unbearable. i brought the bottle back down and scrunched my features together. armin laughed, “i’m not the only lightweight anymore, huh.”

skipping over eren, i passed it to jean, “can it, i’ll catch back up soon.” i tried to keep the frown from showing, knowing that i would never catch up. the taste was subsiding, and there were no other signs that i had even consumed alcohol. mikasa stood from their towel, grabbing it up as armin followed, “we’re gonna warm up by the cars,” she wrapped it around her body, hiding the shiver.

“‘kay, we’ll wrap up here soon,” eren responded before tying his hands to my body again. jean laid back on his towel as his shivers subsided with the alcohol, “so you really can’t get drunk?”

“nope,” i sighed my answer, leaning into eren further.

“damn, that must really suck,” he smirked, exchanging a glance at me, then eren. connie and sasha had emerged from the water, their screams becoming less muffled as they approached. connie broke into a sprint, heading towards jean. he was already laughing in preparation, before shaking his body violently; dripping all of the ocean water on jean.

jean jumped up immediately, “fucking asshole!” he yelled, already beginning to chase a fleeing connie. sasha giggled as she ran after them; arms held out to jean. my chest heaved with a laugh, bumping up against eren’s, “dumbasses.”

laying my head flat on his chest, my phone ringing caused me to retract it right back.

(xxx)-929-6785:

could we meet at the cafe?

my eyebrows furrowed, and i could feel eren lurch in curiosity behind me. “the fuck?” i muttered lightly, more to myself. i knew who that number belonged to; even if i didn’t have it saved anymore. why would she be texting me?

“who is it?” eren laid his hand over my shoulder; to offer comfort, or draw me out of my thoughts, i wasn’t sure. “it’s historia?” i mumbled again in confusion, but eren heard it. i held my phone screen so he could read the message; i felt him stiffen slightly. “you should go,” he was confident, barely had to think about it.

his grip on my shoulder squeezed in reassurance. i knew he was right; and i would regret not meeting with her. but i couldn’t help but feel like i was fifteen again; insecure and cleaning to the comfort of historia. no, i thought, i’m not doing it for that.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

i stood outside of the coffee shop an hour later, hesitating to go in. eren waited in the parking lot, it would be easy enough to go back. i wasn’t going to pass up this opportunity, though, and that thought is what let me open the doors and walk in.

her blonde hair was easy to spot, she looked over to me almost immediately. a hesitant smile was on her face, unsure if she should even be smiling. it was weird to see that expression directed towards me; it had been so long since we had really looked at each other. she didn’t have any coffee in front of her, just her hands that were intertwined with each other.

i sat down opposite her, mimicking her facial expressions. just as unsure as she was. we made awkward eye contact again, “hey,” my tone was quiet, not sure of what to say. her lip twitched, “i wanted to reach out, when hitch told me about the break in, but.. it just felt false.”

historia seemed somewhat nervous, spouting words without really thinking them through. i didn’t know what to say, so i nodded instead. we both looked at each other uncomfortably again. it was hard to believe we had once been inseparable; now we passed for two strangers. “i, um- i’m really sorry,” she began again, stuttering over her words with uncertainty.

“for what?” i couldn’t help but probe. there was a lot for us to apologize for, but i wondered what part of the story historia was even sorry for. maybe this was a bad idea. “for sleeping with porco,” her tone was finally definitive. definitely a bad idea. hearing those words caused me to pick at my cuticles. it didn’t bring me any relief, as my skin stitched itself together quickly.

i sighed, “that’s really not what i need an apology for,” i said it quietly. suddenly, i was submissive in her presence. like i still had something to show for. each of us stood still, breathing audibly, “why now? we’ve been going to sina together for two years?”

she shrugged, somehow still making the action look delicate, “i heard you might be transferring. didn’t want a stone to go unturned.” i couldn’t gauge how that made me feel. i guess i should be happy she didn’t want me to leave without a resolution? after we move, i likely won’t see historia again. how does that make me feel? i still couldn’t decipher it. “how do you know?”

“it’s obvious when you pick up extra classes at the end of the year,” she humorlessly laughed. if i didn’t know her any better, i’d say she was hurt. it made it even more apparent that i shouldn’t mend the friendship we once had. “guess so,” shrugging, i looked away from her gaze.

historia sucked in a breath, “but i am sorry.. for everything that went down between us, it’s all my fault.” it was easy to believe her; but i wasn’t naive. does this mean she truly did love me all those years? i couldn’t bring myself to ask. “it isn’t all your fault, but i forgive you,” i tried to keep my voice steady.

hearing that from historia finally felt like a book closing. i felt like i could finally move on from that chapter in my life. i got up from the booth, ready to return back to my present life. “hey, y/n?” historia pulled me back in, still seated, “are we ever going to talk again?”

my steps faltered, the words sounding weird coming from her, “i don’t think so, no.” maybe if my life was different, i would run back to historia. instead, i took my leave to the exit, making my way back to eren.

the cold air was comforting; i hadn’t realized how stuffy i had gotten in that booth. there was a small pressure gone from my back. the little bit of historia i had always carried around with me. i was happy for the closure; it made the move a definite choice. nothing was really keeping me here any longer.

opening the door to eren’s car, i sat down, somewhat shell shocked. i was still absorbing the conversation; still taking all of it in. i was sure myself a year ago would be jumping for joy, and running back into hisotira’s comforting arms. “how’d it go?” eren broke the silence, tone walking on eggshells around me. i shrugged, unsure of how to unravel it to him. “that bad, huh?” he laughed through his nose.

“it wasn’t bad, i just don’t know how to feel,” it was the truth. i couldn’t make sense of the emotions stirring in my stomach. “are you glad you listened to me?” he mocked, a goofy smile spreading on his face. i pushed his shoulder; which he didn’t budge from.

i rolled my eyes, moving my neck with them, “i hate that you’re phrasing it like that, but yeah.” eren pulled the gear shift down into drive, “i have something that’ll brighten your mood.” his hand found mine, interlocking our fingers, and giving my palm a squeeze. “what?” i tried to fight the smile on my face.

“it’s a surprise,” he dragged the words out, taunting me. “come on, just tell me!” eren turned his focus on navigating the road, already starting to tune my pleas out, “it’s not a telling-thing… trust me you’ll want to see it.”

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

the blindfold eren tied to me was beginning to irritate me. “is it ready yet?” i asked, although i could still hear his fingers clicking on the laptop. i heard him grunt, and i knew he was rolling his eyes, “i don’t understand how you have so little patience.” his hand pushed against my back, throwing me off-kilter.

i groaned, “i don’t like being blindfolded.” eren’s breath grazed the side of my neck “really?” he whispered in my ear. a shiver went down my spine, and i clenched my legs together to hide the reaction before pushing him back with my elbow. “okay, fine. done,” he chuckled.

eren pulled the blindfold off, tussling my hair in the process. i didn’t have time to fix it, eyes focusing on his laptop screen in front of me. “eren, what is that,” although, i already knew the answer. it was a cottage; similar to the cabin he took me to. it was quaint; but cozy. the exterior was covered in lush vines, and it was surrounded by what looked like acres of empty land.

“it’s a house. our house actually,” i peeked over at him. he was already staring into my eyes, a satisfied smile on his face. “OUR house?” my tone was obnoxiously confused. it was obvious we would need a house.. but eren took the time to find one himself. a perfect one; and it would be ours. the feeling was so surreal i couldn’t begin to describe it.

eren laughed at my reaction, wrapping his hands around my waist and fiddling with my skin underneath my clothes, “well, yeah as long as you like it.” i flipped through more of the pictures, looking at the interior. the rooms were old fashioned; down to the kitchen appliances. “i love it.”

the photos showed a closer view of the land around it, “there’s enough room for farmland, so we can own animals.” the next was a picture of a small brown barn. i couldn’t keep the smile off my face imagining what life would be like there, “really?” i still couldn’t believe it. “mhm,” he mumbled, a goofy grin still glued to his face.

“are there vampires in germany?” i hadn’t thought about it. i suddenly wondered if we were trading in grisha for a worse masochist. “i can only assume so. but grisha was too caught up with the vampires here that he never cared to venture out,” it didn’t bring me much comfort.

i turned my body to face eren fully, “it’s perfect,” i whispered, bringing my face closer to his. our lips connected, and his grip on my waist tightened. he picked up my body to position myself on his lap; i opened my mouth allowing his tongue to enter mine.

my hands traced up his body, stopping to grip his moving jawline. his hands made their way up my shirt, two fingers squeezing my nipple. i pulled back from him, letting out a soft moan. the thought hit me then, “what if you get tired of me?” i couldn’t help but voice it.

his features turned serious in an instant, “i won’t,” he answered immediately, and confidently. when i thought about it, i hadn’t known eren for that long. it doesn’t matter, my mind contradicted. “you can’t know that.”

“i can,” he pulled his hand from underneath my shirt, cupping my cheeks while squeezing them lightly. “you’ve been on my mind longer than you know.. i’m not going to get tired of you,” i wasn’t quite sure what he meant, but it warmed my heart anyway. like a natural reaction.

i nodded, “i’m more worried you’ll get tired of me,” eren laughed, squeezing my cheeks even harder, squishing my lips together. “impossible,” i giggled, shaking off his grip.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

spotify playlist

#eren jaeger #eren jaeger fanfiction #eren jeager x reader #eren jaeger smut #eren yeager #eren yaeger smut #eren yaeger x reader #attack on titan #jean kirstein #mikasa ackerman

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musicofthenightphantomoftheopera · 7 months

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KOSA UPDATE:

(I made this it's own seprate post since the original is so long)

I saw someone reblog the original post whomst is from another country and is unsure of how to help.

So if you're in another country, here's how you can help:

If you have ANY friends that live in America, tell them about this bill. You can show them my original post talking about it if you want to because it's now pinned to the top of my page.

I have seen not a SINGLE person outside of tiktok besides myself on ANY other social media platform talking about this bill even though this thing literally spells the end of social media and the internet itself as we know it. and that's SCARY. I've been doing everything I can to spread it, but I'm just one person and it's still not enough.

And unfortunately, looks like my statement in the orignal post about how it will also effect those that don't live in the US has been proven correct in more ways than one. I was notified an hour b4 I made this post that a mass internet censorship bill similar to KOSA just got passed in the UK. It hasn't gone into effect yet, so there's still time for public outcry to overturn it, but the fact that a KOSA copycat bill got passed in another country is scary.

So yes. If you live outside the states, tell EVERYONE. Use your own platforms across all your social to spread the owrd if you have any. and ensure any friends or mutuals you have that live in the US are notified. Share the links to the petitions and resources and action items in my original post. we CANNOT afford to let this fascist nightmare come true

And I should also add another tidbit i recently found out. The right wing organization known as The Hertiage Foundation that authored what is essentially a Mein Kampf 2.0 style manifesto of how republicans plan on destroying our democracy if a republican wins the presidency in 2024 called The 2025 Project (which you can read on their website) has stated that KOSA is directly aligned with their goal which makes this even worse. again. When I say we cannot afford this Fascist nightmare to come true, I'm not exaggerating

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liveblogsandthots · 28 days

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this is my official coming out as a dean winchester girly post so here it goes

okay so something that i saw a while ago and has been bugging me since was a dean anti being like bla bla bla dean winchester is so pathetic for being upset and sad for his dad leaving him and doing his own thing when sam when to college like he was in his twenties he should have been fine it wasn’t a big deal whatever

im not going to come on here and say that dean was perfect and never did anything wrong or anything like that because boy howdy did the writers give him some questionable lines/plot points (kicking cas out of the bunker, how he first interacted with jack, three of the cheerleaders are legal) but jensen plays him in such a compelling way and his character is just really interesting but i just cannot get behind this take that he shouldn’t have been fucked up by this

we all know that if you look up codependent in the dictionary sam and dean would show up and john winchester is responsible for that. they grew up hoping from town to town barely staying long enough to make friends much less figure out how to keep in contact especially without social media and texting being what it is today. there were some other semi stable presences in their lives like bobby and pastor jim but they were still always temporary. now. when sam leaves for stanford he takes half the people in deans support system with him and he’s not good at staying in contact as we know from the pilot when they mention they haven’t talked in two years. also! deans not upset because his brother is leaving for college, he’s upset because thanks to john winchester’s a+ parenting he’s leaving for good, he’s not coming back for some weekends or for any other breaks, he’s leaving as in gone and planning on staying gone. but anyways when sam leaves that leaves john as the only person in deans life that he knows and is in contact with. he is not some normal twenty something living away from home for the first time and his complaining because he has to figure stuff out on his own, he is a deeply traumatized and lonely young man who literally has no one else in his life after his dad starts going on hunts without him. the only people he sees and talks to are strangers and it’s always small talk or maybe comforting the occasional victim and doing the occasional interview

he’s not being overdramatic for being hurt by being left by the only people he has left in the world. his experiences are not the same as a normal persons and obviously he’s not going to react the same way and that is okay! it is completely justified! also even if i did have a normal life with friends and coworkers and aunts uncles and cousins i would probably also be upset and a little depressed if my dad and my brother walked out on me and then barely contacted me after they left at pretty much any age??

anyways that was my little rant not sure if it makes sense to anyone else but just wanted to put it out there

#supernatural #dean winchester #spn meta #meta #john winchester

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stormblessed95 · 1 year

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Storytime Stormie for some of these anons/readers from a queer older ARMY! Let’s talk about queer men for a sec. I’m not a guy, but I’ve quite literally grown up in the queer community (I have memories of being in gay bars with my mum at the age of 5) and there are a few things that I notice with queer men in their 20s: a lot of men I know, found their person really young and they’re in it for life. They’ve been with their primary partners from the jump. But also - gay culture is often more fluid than het culture (please watch another queer Korean’s (Joel Kim Booster) wonderful film Fire Island for reference) and often it’s hard on the outside to know quite ‘what’s going on with the guys’ - it’s like worlds away from how my lesbian friends operate haha. To the point: one of my younger cousins is about 30 now and has been with his partner since Freshmen year of college, there was this period where they were “open” when they lived in different cities but still together but then in recent years, they’ve both gone basically silent on social media. *then* his partner didn’t come down to our hometown for annual family visits 2 years in a row (when his brothers’ partners all came down) and I started thinking “oh dear, maybe it’s not working out for them - they’ve been together so long, maybe that’s just how it goes” …. so my Mum is at dinner with my cousins and texts me after “I have news about [my cuz and his partner]” - and I think “ah, they broke up huh?” NOPE. They got MARRIED nearly a year ago and told no one and then literally forgot to tell any of fam once they were actually telling people. They are HUSBANDS now. Lol. And had been traveling quietly together most of the year between jobs. And his now-husband missed the trip because he had just started a new job. Goes to show that social media and visible travel plans didn’t mean a darn thing. I’m very happy for them, they’re super cute and like 11 years into their relationship, they put a ring on it! Good for them ahah. Storytime over.

Lol thanks for sharing! Cute Storytime!

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wolfboy88 · 1 year

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Teen Wolf Movie Review

I will admit when I first heard that there was going to be a movie, I was pretty damn well ecstatic as I think most of us were. I was excited to revisit these characters and see what they had been up to. But as the months went on and announcements were made about the upcoming movie, my excitement began to dwindle in the lead up to it’s release.

I’ve gone into this viewing already knowing the plot and having seen the spoilers on my social media feeds and by reading the reviews. So, without further ado, I will now begin my own review.

FYI Spoilers ahead. You’ve been warned.

Okay, I’m gonna bite the bullet and just say it – the movie actually wasn’t as bad as I thought it was going to be, but I didn’t exactly love it either. I think the problem lies in the title because it’s misleading in that it actually doesn’t feel like a movie, instead it feels like a 3-part episode crammed together, overstuffed with content and easter eggs, and oddly paced at times with a rushed ending.

It feels like a soft reboot as well as a sequel to Season 3 and Season 3 only. Anything that happened from Season 4 onwards feels irrelevant and unconnected and at times it seems like Jeff doesn’t even remember his own character’s or what happened to them unless it’s Scott or Allison. By making Scallison endgame again it has simply undone seasons worth of character development just for the sake of bringing Scott and Allison back together. And for what? I don’t really know. The show evolved over the years and changed into something I quite enjoyed but Jeff seems stuck in the past, just like the movie is at times.

The first hour takes great care to set up everything and to assemble the characters. I personally really enjoyed the first hour and I think it would have made much more sense for it not to be a movie but either a miniseries or a limited series. It would have been a stellar first episode. There just wasn’t enough time to properly deal with everything, to give anything enough room to breathe or to give the emotional beats time to hit their mark and to be fully felt let alone give any of the characters beside Scott, Allison, Eli, and Derek any resolution or closure.

The build up to the final big fight scene should have been epic but it fell short and flat and rushed with most of the characters either tied up (literally, I’m not joking, there supposed to be werewolves for christ sake) or standing around doing nothing. The plot was simply downright bonkers. Yes, it was mad crazy but at times hella enjoyable but isn’t that the charm of Teen Wolf.

Alright I’m gonna heavily divulge into the plot now. So Spoilers… and I’m gonna do by best to summarise this as best I can but like I said, it’s mad bonkers.

Mr Harris, the long forgotten about teacher who died at the hands of Jennifer Blake in 3A is actually behind everything. For what you ask? To get his revenge on Scott and his friends. I was scratching my head at this because no explanation or context is given. It’s just accepted. Like didn’t he have his head cut off or something? There were scars around his neck like it had been stitched back on, but nothing is explained about his apparent resurrection.

So basically Mr Harris flies to Japan to steal the jar that is housing the Nogitsune that is at a ramen shop that Liam and Hikari own and releases the Nogitsune who brings Allison back to life and uses the Oni to kidnap everybody and hold them hostage in a magical spirit realm located underneath the college lacrosse stadium.

The Nogitsune plan is basically to have Allison shoot Scott in the heart and have him die in her arms and make everyone watch and so he can capture their sadness to become even more powerful. Scott pretends to die but Hikari temporarily gives him her armour to protect him.

Nogitsune then turns into a werewolf-nogitsune-hybrid-monster-thing (?!?) and the impending big battle falls flat. Basically, everyone stands around doing nothing as Derek, Eli and Scott fight hybrid monster in another magical realm before breaking through to end up atop of the Nemeton that is now on the lacrosse field (?!?) It is then decided that Parrish will hug the monster and burn it to death using his hellfire but it turns out the monster won’t stay still long enough for him to it so Derek basically offers himself up to be fried to death, and dies in front of his son and the trauma cycle for the Hale’s continues.

Derek’s death doesn’t sit right with me. For one, I don’t believe Derek nor the Nogitsune are actually dead. It feels too easy like it will be the next plot to another film. But did Jeff really go I’m gonna burn Derek to death like his own family did in the house fire? Like come on, it just feels icky and wrong and if Derek had to die, I personally believe it would have had a bigger emotional impact if Derek had died earlier when Allison shot him in the neck at the high school around the 1-hour mark. That would have upped the stakes and made everything seem more direr as well as being an incredible emotional pull. It would have given the story more depth than simply being about Scott and Allison.

This might also be a controversial opinion, but I personally believe Peter should have been the one to die. It would have been a real full circle moment for the series as a whole and for his character development. Going from being the original big bad villain to sacrificing himself for a pack who he tried to kill many times and ended up helping in the end. The emotional pull would have hit harder as we already know and care about Malia unlike Eli who we barely even know.

In saying that, Eli was good addition but it’s hard to ignore that he is essentially a cardboard copy of Stiles, right down to his mannerisms. Except for being a wolf.

I don’t even know what the point of Liam and Mason being in the movie was. They were barely in it and had a combined screen time of like ten minutes and had no scenes together except for one and even that was a stretch. So, Jeff wants us to believe that these two didn’t stay best friends? It’s really hard to fathom. And I think that’s what irks me the most. My two favourite characters being basically shafted. They served no real purpose to the story other than just being there.

Other new addition Hikari was lovely, but we didn’t get much time to appreciate her or know anything about her except only that she is a kitsune and it becomes painfully obvious why Kira was relevant to the story. The lending of her armour was a pretty cool lore development but it feels like it was meant to be an arc for Kira’s story.

I would also like to point out that if it hadn’t been mentioned beforehand in interviews, I would have not known that Liam and Hikari were together and at best they felt like platonic besties like Mason and Liam should have been. Also, Hikari’s age is never mentioned but she would have to be older than 17 to own a restaurant.

Stiles’ absence had been well-warned about and while it was felt at times, Scott and Lydia’s friendship was enough to ground the movie. Arguably I think Posey and Roden turned out their best work in this. Poesy is fabulous as a leading man and Roden’s always been a powerhouse in literally any her scenes, and I have to say Lydia and Scott’s reunion scene was just the right side of poignant and palpable.

The chemistry between the rest of the cast is pretty much intact too and at times it felt like coming home or being wrapped in a nice cosy blanket and there’s some wicked enjoyment at being able to see Teen Wolf characters finally getting to swear on screen, even if it felt unwarranted at times.

At times it was corny as fuck and mad bonkers but hey, that was part of Teen Wolf’s allure and charm. The humour of the series is still there but not quite as strong as it could have been. Shelley’s deadpan delivery of Malia’s lines had been chucking at my screen and Jackson and Peter were just there as comedic relief. The scene where Peter literally crawls around the rock face sniffing the ground was just hands down too funny and plain weird.

Malia and Parrish’s relationship didn’t gel with me, and the nude scene wasn’t really needed. Although it was nice to see their hot bods. I also liked the brotherly sisterly thing going on with Malia and Eli. And also the hint at Malia and Derek’s niece-uncle relationship.

Like most of the movie, nothing is mentioned or explained about what happened after the show ended and we’re left wondering about what happened to all the relationships that were in place when the credits rolled around for the last episode. I think that’s my biggest gripe is that we have no real answers to what happened after the end of show. There’s no mention of the war or what happened to Monroe. Was she caught? Is she dead? Does everyone know that supernatural creatures exists? Like was a 15-year time jump really necessary? I think 5 years would have done just fine. It’s sad that the pack didn’t stay together because I really don’t believe that would have happened. Yes, some of them were going off to college and whatnot, but it still made sense for them to return or at least stay in contact.

Apparently, the only couple still together is Ethan and Jackson, of all people. Apparently Lydia and Stiles broke up because Lydia kept having a recurring dream or premonition if you will, of them having a car accident and Stiles dying. I don’t how to feel about that. But I guess that’s why the Jeep was left in Beacon Hills.

There is literally no mention of Corey or Theo or anyone else. Scott and Malia’s relationship is reduced to nothing but an awkward reunion and then simply brushed aside, just like about everything else that’s happened in the series after the events of 3B. And I find it weird that Hayden didn’t return. If Scott needed his pack you would think he’d knew all of his bitten betas.

The nods and easter eggs back to the show were a delight and purely fan service and I lapped them all up. It was also nice to see Victoria Argent back in two brief cameos when Allison is talking to the Nogitsune and he turns into her mother. The flashbacks were great too.

I loved that Liam had the opening scene and that Scott trusted him to keep the jar safe. It does back sense to have the jar far away as possible from Beacon Hills, but it is disappointing that he barely interacted with anyone else. Not Mason. Not Scott. Again, what happened to the alpha and beta bond that is supposed to be stronger than a parental? But did like Liam coming in for the save on Derek.

Same with Mason, his scenes were basically with Parrish and the Sherriff, and I don’t buy Mason being a cop. Jeff dropped the ball with them, and it clearly shows. Painfully so.

All in all, it wasn’t the return to Beacon Hills that I’d hoped for. It was entertaining and had flashes to its heyday but ultimately it was disappointing too. It feels like Jeff wrote a love letter for only half the show and failed to move pass that era of the show and at times reads like a canon divergence fan fic.

Would I watch Teen Wolf Movie again? Probably, but just for shits and giggles and the warm hug. And just to see Liam with his beard. But really, I’d rather rewatch the series again.

I’m gonna head back to my Thiam corner of the fandom now and believe that Liam ran off with Theo to Japan to be together away from the pack. Striked up a beautiful friendship with Hikari and Theo was unable to return to Beacon Hills to help because he was off galivanting with Isaac in Paris 😊

And for those who did watch the film, I’d love to hear your thoughts and take too.

#teen wolf movie #teen wolf #review

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