#I just do not have the sense for color that I do for expression/composition(ish)
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AUDIO
Hi. How are you? Kinda hot out, huh? Not too bad though. Nice jacket… Yeah… Oh, are you waiting for me? Oh man I’m sorry I was just — you know. Anyways, yeah I’m Evan, you know me, I draw them pictures but that’s not all I do, no sir, I am multidimensional, like an egg, insofar as an egg got the old xyz axes what tell it what volume it occupy within cartesian space, but it’s also got them eggy subcomponents what create division WITHIN the larger organizing dimensional paradigms of space and time. So like the egg I do persist in reality but I simultaneously occupy different spacial organizations. I draw them pichahs, shuah mistah j, I also write words as I’m sure you’ve noticed, but that’s just the shell and the whites, down there somewhere is a runny yolk comprised not of lines, color, or hallucinations of meaning but of SOUND.
I also do audio is what I’m saying. More pertinently I sometimes do audio for Thetics stuff. Nearly all of it is under wraps but recently we bashed together a little low-stakes actual play podcast pilot and I thought it might be fun to show you how the intro music happened. Walk with me. (Character art part 3 is still in the pipes, up next.)
The current intro music for our little podcast Argent.
Now this is an odd bit of work for me because I'm normally a cahhhmpahsishin* fellow but for this piece I did nearly everything but write the parts. It’s really a kitbash of musical ideas from various things that I arranged and recorded.
*composition. If you can tell me why I’m doing this bullshit, please do, I’d really love to know.
When we were first tossing the idea for this podcast around (way before we started putting it together or anything) Sasha sent me a little melody they imagined on guitar, and I recorded it and sent it back to them with a little expansion.
Music is often an early thought for us in our projects. Having themes or motifs or ideas about instrumentation can help us create a visceral sense of feelings we’re aiming for. In long writing or design stretches, they act like anchors, a place to return to, or verify our current work with.
Here, there was this lovely sense of troubadour-ish-ness with the single guitar, an intimate kind of feeling, like someone was there in the room with you, playing in this very stripped down yet melodic manner you might characterize as vaguely renaissance pastiche. Anchor set, it had something to it musically and it married well with the nature of the program, relatively light, a little trope-y, that good ol’ mixolydian brightness lighting up a sense of majesty and adventure. That being said, we knew it wouldn’t be the whole picture. There was more to find.
Dinky lil things. I like sketching with dinky sounds cause it sorta takes expressivity out of the equation, makes you focus on the notes.
I did a lot of sketches with little dinky music box noises and strings and whatnot, tried expanding out the guitar sections with folk-isms and fingerpicky stuff, but nothing really clicked. To my ear we were missing something, a feeling of expanse and motion. The main character in our podcast is a courier traveling the country, after all.
Thinking about travel put me in mind of music I’d been listening to from West Africa. I’d gone down a little guitar douche rabbit hole, having gotten introduced to Oumou Sangare and lapping up projects featuring her guitarist and then out into more work by your Ali Farka Touré, your Tinariwen, etc. I imagine this is the kind of thing every guitar guy does when they’re confronted by “desert blues” stuff, and it’s for good reason. It’s a bridge between many different traditions, and it’s produced a style of guitar playing that is both very interpretable to anyone who’s learned the blues scale and very different in it’s rhythmic priorities and ornamentation.
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Afel Bocoum's Niger stuck out to me as a really wonderful picture of motion, expressed through it's rhythmic motifs and groove. It is, as you may imagine, a song about the Niger river, and I find it hard not to imagine walking beside a great river when I hear it, especially when it kicks into the higher tempo and you get the little triplet figure on top of the 16th note engine -- just the perfect amount of syncopation to give it a real spring in its step. It's also worth noting that these dudes are all real good musicians, and their improvisation and interplay gives all their music so much life and unpredictability. Listening to artists like this convinced me utterly that the core of music for the podcast had to be something played live, that we should really minimize elements like synths or samples.
To be fair, that's usually a thing I want. I tend to write a lot of guitar-forward stuff for projects as a result, but there are things which always wind up compromised when working alone. For example I am not a drummer, I do not own a drumkit and software drums trying to sound real nearly always wind up sounding pretty lame. In all my time doing music production the best drum sounds i've gotten out of software have been leaning into their un-reality. But then you hear musicians like this and you remember oh man live percussion is just a thousand times better. John Bonham is just a thousand times better.
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Easily in my top 5 of all time
Led Zeppelin's Swan Song is nearly never not in mind when thinking about acoustic guitar music. It is possibly one of the most important tracks in my life and god damn it it's only on bootlegs! If Afel Boucoum nailed a feeling of motion through nature with Niger, Jimmy Page nailed a feeling of pastoral majesty and myth with Swan Song. It's one of them DADGAD tunes with that rich, ringing openness to the guitar. In the late 60s-early 70s rock vernacular, songs with this tuning are usually heavily blues based, and you hear a lot of inflections like that here but it's all cast in this much more regal light through more complex harmony. Contrasts. The V chord that opens the section around 1:20 sounds so welcome and grand contrasted to the flighty major 7s running around, the song dancing modally between major* and mixolydian. Really, a V chord has never sounded better, contrasted with the heaviness of the low D5.
*yeah if you wanna use modal terminology it's ionian. Hush, I'm trying to write.
Now this is what was floating around in my head like a year ago when we were discussing the project. It's really quite fertile ground for music making, but! As it sometimes goes, other projects took precedence. DT2 became kind of a full time gig for us and if we were gonna be doing audio for things we ought to be doing audio things for that. So Argent got shelved, and further musical explorations with it.
Which is why it was kind of bizarre to pick it back up when we decided to pitch it. Back in those early discussions we'd recorded a couple test episodes, real barebones affairs with awful audio and a very shakey gameplay system, that we were gonna use for our submission. It seemed pretty apparent we needed to sorta class the joint up a bit so my plan was to score some of the episode and bash together an intro as quick as possible.
What does an intro need, really? In my estimation, it needs a bed for voice-over, a section where the music takes the forefront that is distinctive and hooky, and some kind of dismount. Not a whole lot really. I spent a bit of time writing stuff trying to pull together the influences noted above into that format, but it became apparent that it was just gonna take more time than we had to get a thing I was really happy with.
Scoring also wound up being a bit of a dud. I wrote a billion little sections on guitar that I was quite happy with but with the awful audio quality of the actual episode, and what wound up being a pretty mediocre setup for acoustic guitar recording, the production just wound up being distracting, the voices and guitar competing for already shakey auditory real estate. We'll have to try that again with better equipment.
So. Compromise. Temporary stopgap measure. I can't make the bulk of the show sound particularly pleasing, I don't have time to compose an intro that really does the thing musically, and I can't record my acoustic guitar to a high standard. I CAN WORK WITH THIS!
Step 1: solve for the guitar.
I know the piece will still have more personality if the acoustic guitar is the main feature. So, ok, time to try a bunch of shit out. I am no stranger to fucked ass audio solutions (you can go look at my old band STRIDER's insta page https://www.instagram.com/strider.tunes/ to understand the depravity) so I know at the very least I can get something to work.
Hypothesis 1: record using my phone.
I've actually had some luck recording with my phone before. Most phones have really aggressive compression going on that can sometimes work to bring up the detail with acoustic guitar, and you also get some nice lo-fi credibility with it.
The lo-fi thing is a double edged sword though cause while the tonality is livable, a lot of noise is not, and I could not get a recording that didn't have a pretty sizable hiss. Add on further compression in the mix and it's a dealbreaker.
Hypothesis 2: weird mic placement
Conventional wisdom regarding acoustic guitar mic placement does not and has never worked with my acoustic guitar. I love that guitar, I've had it since I was like 14, but god damn it doesn't like to be recorded, and especially not with an SM7b which is the best I got right now. So time to just try everything, put the mic in the sound hole, fuckin put it behind me, above me, next door.
The best one I found is kind of over the guitar in front of my shoulder, sort of where my head would be if I got real hunchy when playing. Still sorta sounds weak, but it's better! This is progress.
Hypothesis 3: Double everything
Jacob Collier mentioned in one of his gigantic logic session breakdowns that a voice that sounds kinda corny can sound really legit if it's doubled or tripled or whatever. This guitar is a little reedy, a little thin on it's own but if I just double track everything...
Now that somehow sounds authoritative. Bam!
Step 2: Grab the parts.
If I'm not gonna have the time to compose a new thing that's really unique and speaks to all our influences, why not just use the influences? Not like we're selling this or anything, this is just to legitimize a pitch. Sasha's initial melody fits the bill for narration bed, Niger fits as the hook, and Swan Song really amps it up for the dismount.
Step 3: Arrange/Produce/Record/Mix
With the melodic and harmonic side basically in place, it's time to figure out the supporting instrumentation. That means settling on things like percussion and bass, drones or textural things, and little odds and ends.
Quite a manageable mix, overall.
I'll spare you a full session breakdown, but let's take a look at some lil details you might miss.
When I was putting together the percussion section I quantized pretty hard at first, getting everything very close to the grid, but these lil bongo and scrape guys had a completely different feel. The loop was from a previous project, played by like a real human, and it's all quite wonky, a lot of it hits very early relative to the grid but it sounds totally natural. So rather than trying to smooth that out, I just made everything else mirror it's wonkiness. It was tedious work scooting all those notes around to mimic those imperfections but the track is much livelier for it.
Speaking of the percussion, there are actually four distinct kick drum sounds on this track (plus some very quiet timpani in the opening). They got very different functions, too. The first is like the core kick drum sound. It's supposed to be pretty acoustic sounding, have some nuance in it's dynamics, but not have too much beef or midrange complexity, because the second is the big boy with that huge low end, you know what brings the grandeur to the proceedings, and then there's the third fellow who hangs out with the first one and marries it with the texture of the snare drum. Fourth is the little knocky fellow who closes things out with the guitar at the very end.
Lastly, lets note the final plagiarism in this piece. The vocal line that comes in at the end (which Sasha sang wonderfully and I aggressively pitch shifted and modulated) is from a piece by Goldfrapp called Crystalline Green.
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There you have it folks! That's a track! I'll leave you with a final thingy: The outtro! I accumulated a lot of drone-y things trying stuff out for the intro, so I took the percussion sections and some of those drone-y things and blasted this out in like half an hour.
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god every time I color it really is like. woah! I do not get color at all.
#my ramblings#?_?#looking at tutorials does not helpnat all#I just do not have the sense for color that I do for expression/composition(ish)
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I, you | Kim Namjoon One Shot
word count: 8.2k
pairing: idol!namjoon x fem reader
summary: namjoon meets you again and he can't help but want you to look at him the same way he has all these years.
disclaimer: it's sort of written from y/n pov. kind of smut included, not too much but still. other then that, i don't think there's anything. it was written a long time ago so i don't clearly remember, sorry!
Namjoon walked in, followed by a few staff members and they occupied the empty chairs on the conference table and I smiled at him and the others. He looked great like always, he was in a navy blue hoodie and a khaki colored trouser, with his hair pushed backwards exposing his forehead.
There was something and nothing between me and him and it was too tiring to play pretend. "You look good", he remarked and I smiled at him. He's always being too kind, I looked like absolute shit, I hadn't slept in three days and my clothes were whatever was in my reach that I'd put on after showering and I rushed here.
I had met him before this level of success but I was merely an assistant director myself and we'd talked about Monet and his work together, he'd similar interests to mine but both of us didn't really get anywhere because of our timing and I believed it was for the good. He'd always expressed how he liked my vision and wants to work with me on something and I didn't believe my vision because what even was my vision that he could see and not me and after being this big I didn't really thought he'll even remember me until he hit my phone one day and here I was, at the label's office to discuss the details of his mixtape's music video.
"So, do you've something in mind?", I asked him and he pressed his back on the chair letting out a yawn, he seemed tired.
"Not really! I want it simplistic and not too hard to understand. I haven't thought about it or anything so I don't know, I would await what you propose", he softly said.
"I haven't heard the track because of--", he intervened, "--ah you haven't? You should hear it first", he said and I nodded.
"I would need to hear it", I told him, thinking about the lengthy talks with the illustrator already.
The staff then pin pointed about the budget, the do nots and other details and two of my team members who were seated beside me talked thoroughly in detail about the technicalities. Namjoon looked bored with all the talk that didn't interest him. He wasn't much different from before slightly bigger.
All of us stood up coming to an agreement when Namjoon asked me to walk up to his studio to hear the track and I asked my team members to go ahead first. I walked through the dark corridor behind him while he talked to someone on the phone, all the way to his studio. I didn't really hear what he was talking because I was invested in staring around the place like I hadn't seen a building before.
The walls were all dark and a comforting shade since I didn't like the sun anyway. It seemed like a night mode in real life.
His studio was the corner most, he typed the passcode in and stood aside gesturing for me to walk in, followed by him. He hung up the phone call and put his phone aside, switching the AC on. He sat behind the monitor while he switched it on and I went through my inbox.
"So, how have you been?", his deep tone, made me look up and I fidgeted to put my eyes on something other then him while he turned his chair around to face me.
"I have been okay-ish, like the projects I'm doing I'm satisfied with them so I guess it's kinda okay", I said and regretted it immediately, I don't even talk like this and he knows it.
"Not the work c'mon, you, your boyfriend, family, other things?", a lose smile hung on his lips and I looked at him. How can someone look like that?
"No boyfriend because you know no one can put up with this profession. I haven't slept in three days so I'm fucking annoyed and the work is too much that I don't have time for other things", I shrugged and he chuckled. I didn't want to think about guys, I barely had time for myself. Filmmaking was a time bound profession.
"I relate, trust me I do", he turned his chair back around, his eyes on the computer screen and I looked at him. I could see why he could relate, I mean of course he didn't had time either. I knew idol schedules enough to know how these things go. "Why didn't you come that day?", he asked me and my insides twisted.
"I was hoping you don't bring it up", I said in a small voice.
"Why not? I waited for you", he said without looking at me and I threw my head back on the couch thinking of the time when he'd asked me out officially and I didn't make it. "At least I deserve to know what was more important that you didn't make it", he looked at me and I closed my eyes shut.
"I had a flight, I got an exclusive food show travel experience with discovery and it was too good for an opportunity to miss", I let it out and took a breath in. I knew I could never leave work for a guy, any guy, or anyone as a matter of fact and as much as I'd thought about it on the plane...it all seemed for the better. He wasn't the kind of guy I could've had my regular thing with and I was too young to be serious.
"It was a good show", he told me. I could feel his eyes on me and I didn't flinch. I didn't regret it but his words made me feel guilty. My head was on the headrest of the sofa I sat on and my eyes were closed. My subconscious could feel his curious gaze on me.
"Look away Namjoon", I said and I could feel his gaze was still on me.
"Why didn't you call me when you got back?", he asked me and I looked at him.
"I didn't because our cultures differ, everything is poles apart--what's the point of discussing it now?", I asked him, slightly annoyed. He and I separately needed to focus on our careers and he knew it too damn well.
"Okay", he turned around again as his monitor showed a circle indicating that the programme he'd launched was loading. "It does makes me feel better that my better position in life doesn't changes your opinion on me. Quiet comforting", he said, with a hint of sarcasm in his voice but I chose to ignore it. The last thing I'd be doing is fueling this feeling in him by discussing this useless thing which wouldn't make any difference whatsoever.
"Is this the reason you wanted me to do this project with you?", I asked him and he swiftly turned his chair around.
"No, I don't take all this for granted. I love the stuff you do. I'm pretty updated thanks to how active you're on your social media", he smiled and I couldn't shook the thought of seeing my psychotic episodes on my Instagram, Twitter...everywhere. I'm pretty weird out there.
"I love it, the stories", he flased his dimple smile before turning his chair around again and I felt his warmth, like he meant what he said.
For a second I was taken aback with how tall he was from me and how good he looked, he'd always looked good but he was more mature now and much more reserved. "I'll be calling you often because I won't send it for pre-production without your say on the concept", I told him.
"I'll look forward to a lot of calls", he said. "I'm sorry this is taking a while", he added quickly and for some reason I couldn't look away from him, whose back was visible to me.
"No, take your time", I said, crossing my arms against my chest. I really wished he was a regular guy just making music but then I didn't. I wouldn't want someone to wish that for me. He'd earned all of it and I knew it.
"Look away ___", he said slowly. I could feel his grin through his words and I looked away shaking my head right and left softly. "It's, yeah it's playing", he turned around as the music filled in the empty atmosphere.
It was a slow song with a really fast rap. It was how Namjoon was, he contradicted himself too much. I instantly knew it was his writing from the way the words went and the wordplay came into role. I couldn't help but analyze the song because I was supposed to shoot and sketch a music video for it and at times like this I didn't really get to enjoy the art for the art and I hated it.
"How was it?", he asked me, his eyes fixated on me as the music faded. I wanted it to last.
"The only problem with it is that it ends", I flashed a smlie at him and he shook his head throwing it back.
"That's too corny even for you", Namjoon rolled his eyes but I was being serious. "You know I appreciate heavy critics", he said.
"I didn't find anything to criticize, the writing is great, the composition fits and it has a catchy vibe to it. I think I would listen a song like that on a drive or something? In your case a bicycle but yeah! It's a good song", I summarized my opinion. "Do you like want a trendy video?", I asked him.
"Anything that you want to do with it", he said and I gently nodded. Since it was given to me, I couldn't stop thinking about what to do with it.
"Can you stop thinking about it while you're with me ___?", he chuckled and I looked at him taken aback for a second and then nodded with a soft smile pasted on my lips.
"Your fashion sense has improved", I remarked.
"You look casual", he teased me.
"I, I've no fashion sense. I just wear whatever is there", I told him.
"I don't think so, your Instagram says different", he said.
"It's for the show Namjoon", I said.
"You're really not the type to do that, please don't deceive me", he beamed before he turned his chair around again to minimize the current tabs on the computer.
"You're the last person I'd be deceiving--", my words were cut from an incoming call from one of the producers of one of the shows I was working on. "I need to take this", I told him and answered the call while he just gave me a gentle nod in response.
The producer had informed me about the issues related to casting and the final draft of the script and I knew I had to go.
"Guess I'll see you later, bye", Namjoon said warmly as he smiled at me. The thing was he just knew and that always stuck somewhere.
"Bye", I left.
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"I, for one, disagree. C'mon how do you even call it an end?", I threw my hands in the air as we discussed it for the millionth time. I liked Su-ho but his thoughts on GOT made me want to kill him. He is the only person I knew who was satisfied with how it ended.
"I think it was okay, c'mon, you have to consider that the novels didn't end and as compared to that I think it was pretty good", Su-ho claimed while he sat on the bean bag in front of me, pushing it comfortably.
"Don't even start with the novels--", my words were interrupted with the sound of the doorbell, "--they didn't even do a good job interpreting it and I am offended by that. Look there novels", I pointed at my bookshelf, showing him my GOT collection which he knew as I opened the door and my head bumped against Namjoon's chest as he took a step in.
He chuckled as he held the back of my head with one hand and pressed my forehead with the other and rubbed it gently to ease the pain.
"What's uh, what's that? Is it iron", I mocked, pointing at his chest while he let me go from his grip and took his shoes off.
"It can be", he said. "But why were you jumping around so enthusiastically?", he asked me as he seated on the couch in front of Su-ho, as he greeted him and Su-ho greeted him back.
"Game of Thrones heavy discussions", I sighed. "This is Su-ho who's illustrating the storyboard", I told Namjoon.
Su-ho was starstruck and it seemed like it'd take him a good minute to recover and Namjoon was obviously used to it. I didn't call him at the office because a lot of people would want to see him then and it could be exhausting plus he'd a time limit on his hands.
"You know him, ___?", Su-ho widened his eyes at me and I nodded, suppressing my laughter seeing his chaotic ass behave like this.
"A little", I said and I could feel Namjoon's gaze on me. "Maybe a lot", I rephrased. I could see by the way Su-ho looked at me that he needed answers. "Coffee?", I asked Namjoon.
"Oh yeah", he replied and I stood up. "I've thought of two concepts, Su-ho please brief him on it and if you want anything differently Namjoon, you can tell him", I told him as I marched towards the kitchen.
Should I use the regular coffee mugs or should I use the better ones? I mean it doesn't matter anyway but still, it kind of does? I don't know. It just comes to me, the over thinking.
Ah.
I could hear him and Su-ho talking about the concepts faintly and I was low-key proud because I did work hard on them. I opened the cabinet to take out the better coffee mugs.
This is what happens when you stop drinking milk and stop growing up. I rested my hands on the kitchen pavement thinking about how many shoes with heels I'd because of my height.
I wasn't very short but I wasn't my desired height too. It was sad. I was the right person to sell the tonics concerning height because my insecurity would make me buy it. I exhaled heavily and turned around to find Namjoon behind me.
"Let me", my hips pressed against the marble pavement while his body gently pressed against my front, I could spot the mole on his neck while he calmly took the box of mugs out. "Okay?", he whispered softly and I looked on without responding.
"Thanks", I told him, hoping he'd get away from me because this had me feeling some type of way. I won't admit what type of way. That makes it worse.
"Anytime", he clicked his lips, taking a few steps back as I stirred the coffee and poured it in three cups. Should've used regular ones.
"I like the quotes on that wall", he said as I handed him his cup, taking the other two. A wall of my house was covered in post-it notes and other stuff. Some print outs of Van Gogh and Frida's works alongside other things.
"Yeah that? Thanks", I said, as I gave the cup to Su-ho. "Did you decide on something?", I asked, as I sat down and Namjoon just beside me.
"Yeah, the first one. It was kind of okay, he made some alterations so I would send it to you by...maximum tomorrow", Su-ho told me. "But why did you call him here for just this?", he asked me.
"You seem so concerned about his whereabouts", I glared Su-ho . "I told him I could just email him but he insisted on doing it in person", I looked at Namjoon who took a long sip from his coffee.
"Yeah I did, don't worry I was absolutely free", Namjoon smiled at Su-ho and I could see Su-ho fanboy-ing.
"You're so in line today", I pressed my words.
"Shut up", Su-ho eyed me. I wrapped my hands around the coffee mug feeling its warmth.
After I talked to Namjoon for a while about the shoot and he explained to me about their company procedure and how they usually did things. I didn't like doing music videos or commercials, there's a lot of time you're bound by what the music video demands and you've to stick with that so that was that. I usually preferred either cinema like movies or dramas, I hadn't done much but I had done a few and travel shows were my preference.
"I'll see you next time then", Su-ho politely remarked looking at Namjoon and he smiled and gently bowed his head. I walked with him up-to the door. "I didn't, what the hell, you could've given me a heads up?", Su-ho whispered slowly to me as I leaned against the door.
"I didn't knew you were a fan", I said and he playfully hit me on my arm.
"I still can't believe it, you've to answer my hot questions next time", he said and I nodded.
"Okay okay", I closed the door shut behind me, taking a seat on the far side of the sofa me and Namjoon were seated on. He was scanning my bookshelf and I was looking at him.
"Literally 70% of it is fiction", he said. I read a lot of fiction and he read a lot of nonfiction.
"You should read fiction", I said and he looked at me slightly pissed.
"I do read fiction just not thar much", he pointed at my bookshelf. "If you've to recommend one, shoot", he said.
"Recommend, uh, the secrets of happiness", I said randomly and his face sunk in annoyance. "It's not a book talking about literal secrets of happiness, it has a story", I told him.
"Ah okay...I will try reading that. Let me take your copy", he said.
"No", I said back in a split second.
"I won't lose it, c'mon, ___", he said. I couldn't believe his testimony on not losing it.
"Fine, but it's annotated. You'll owe me big time if you lose it", I said and he nodded vigorously.
"Your place is great", he said looking around the house and I couldn't see why, I mean yeah maybe but not that I find it great if I think from his point of view.
"I'm barely here anyway. I pay rent for no reason", I kept the empty mug in my hand on the glass table in front of us.
"That was your friend though, Su-ho?", Namjoon asked as he kept his cup, followed by me.
"Oh yeah! I met him for work but then it's been a while since I know him, it's been years actually and he's a friend now", I said thinking about Su-ho. I don't know why I bothered explaining. It's been a good five years since Namjoon and I hadn't been in touch and there was a little catching up to do.
"You've always had a lot of friends, don't you", he sighed as he sat cross legged on the sofa facing me. I do have plenty friends honestly.
"Kind of", I shrugged. His gaze on me made me sit back in a more cautious way as I fixed my posture. "Namjoon...", I called out his name when the doorbell rung and I was irritated. "Give me a second", I stood up and walked up-to the main door.
It was my neighbor who's mother had left their house keys with me and he was here to take it back. He thanked me for keeping it and walked up to his own flat which was in front of mine.
I closed the door shut and Namjoon was standing by the balcony seeing a cactus I had grown since I couldn't grow any other plant because I was never home to take care of them in case.
"It's cute", he said as he picked the potted plant and stared at it for a little while and I stood behind him and watched him see it.
"You know your pupils dilate when you see plants", I said and he smiled to himself. He kept the cactus back in its resting place and stared at me. "What?", I asked him.
"You were going to say something", he said, his voice sounded deeper then usual for a second and I licked my bottom lip in haste.
"Oh that, you know the alterations you made? I will directly mail it to the staff and maybe cc you because it won't need a second check anyway. I've to get this done a little early since I've--", he turned towards me and I took a step back but there was barely any space and my back was pressed against the wall, "--what is it?", I asked but it came out as a whisper.
"Here", he dragged his index finger across my bottom lip and there was something on my lip. I didn't really see what was on there because of his presence so close to me. My heartbeat had fastened and I could feel it. Something I didn't want to feel.
"Thanks, I guess", I said slowly and he flashed his dimple smile at me and in that moment he seemed the opposite of the dominant he was a few seconds ago.
"Do you know you look really good?", he said, as his fingers ran across my ear touching the piercings one by one. I regretted having three all of a sudden. "And I didn't intended to do this but ___ I uh", he bent over a little, his lips a few inches away from my ear and his breath was falling on my neck.
"Namjoon", I said, trying to not look at him. I knew damn well I couldn't be able to control myself.
"Hmm", his voice was so small and I could feel goosebumps all over my neck. His gaze on me was strong and I had jitters in my stomach.
"I, uh--let's not okay", I put my hands on his shoulder as he pulled me more closer with a jolt and I gasped.
"Do you really not want to?", he asked me. It was a while since I was in this close proximity of someone like this but my subconscious kept telling me not to. "I don't understand what you find so undesirable about me", he took a few steps back and looked away.
What?
"Do you think I find you undesirable?", I asked him, pressing my lips suppressing my smile. I couldn't get how could he change roles in a span of few seconds.
"Yeah, it's pretty evident really", he sighed, looking at the the far side of the sky at the horizon and I saw him sulking.
"It's not that, are you fucking dumb? It's just you know you shouldn't start things you can't take care of", I said. For some reason I've always felt a little hesitant with him. "But you're desirable enough", I added.
"Sudden validation from you, ah", he clicked his lips in mockery and I felt bad. The last thing I wanted was to look like I was playing hard to get. I didn't feel competent enough in my heart. "Let me kiss you", he said, taking a few steps closer breaking the chain of my thoughts and I hated being so much in control and feeling a little out of place.
I was back to where I was a few seconds ago, me cornered and he put his lips on mine and my body automatically responded. He took over me in a second. My hands rested on his back and clutched the fabric. His hands travelled below my hips as he pulled me upwards and my legs wrapped around his waist. He didn't stop kissing me for one second and I didn't want him to, as he pressed his mouth harder on mine and I bit back a moan. I could feel the heat in my body and every vein seemed to electrify. He walked me up-to my bedroom like he knew which suddenly felt foreign to me as he laid me on the bed, breaking the kiss and I was breathless, panting for air.
I didn't had any resort in me to stop. I didn't want him to stop. I couldn't care more about whatever that had me concerned for a while. He watched me look at him and his lips curved in a smirk. "Should I stop?", he teased me taking a seat on the edge of the bed and I looked away from him to the right side, scoffing.
I pushed myself up, my hands at the hem of the lose white t-shirt I'd on and for a second I hesitated at the fact that he must've seen better flesh than mine but I pulled it upwards exposing myself in front of him as his eyes went everywhere. "Do you want to stop?", I asked him, as I crawled over to him. He didn't object as I sat on his lap and took his face in my hands. I looked in his eyes. He looked beautiful. I traced the outline of his skull, his jaw as I pushed his hair locks that were on his forehead behind. "Do you want to stop Namjoon?", I asked him again as he held me tight, giving me my answer.
He tugged at my neck with his mouth leaving a trail of gentle kisses down and I could feel my nipples startlingly prominent beneath the black lightweight bra I had on. I clutched his hair as he bit my neck suddenly and I gasped.
He pushed me on to him, nearer but there was barely any space for me to come close and I could feel him all over. He messily kissed me before groping my bottom and I-I cut a breath in. He would take turns and be gentler a second and rough the another. "Namjoon", I called out gasping which fueled him even more. He looked at me and smiled proudly at how he had me without doing much.
He flicked the straps of my bra shoving it down exposing my breasts and I could feel my nipples harden to the point it was painful. I wanted him. I wanted him to touch me, more. The way my body responded to his touch was almost funny, how quick, how wet.
I patiently unbuttoned his shirt and stripped it off of him while he looked at me with a gaze I couldn't quite make anything of, he just looked at me while he let me work on him. My hands touched his chest and my eyes examined his torso, his skin was warm and his gaze on me gave me confidence like he wanted me back as much I wanted him.
I was forgetting my own desperation for his touch as my hand traveled behind his back, trailing down to his spine and he looked at me as he cut a sharp breath in and I felt good seeing him giving in to me. His arms surrounded mine unclasping my bra in a second and he threw it off on the floor.
I half expected him to grab me and grope my breast but he swept me in his arms as his vaguely pink mouth pressed against mine and instead of hastily grabbing me, his mouth simply rested against mine and it was worse, much more intoxicating. I, on instinct coiled my arms against his neck.
As my tongue demanded entrance and he smiled before letting me, and in a second, roles were reversed, the romantic was gone. He took control and pressed his mouth harder on me with his thumb and finger pressing my nipple and my nails dug deeper in his neck. "Joon...", I on instinct called out, as I gasped for breath but he didn't let me.
He was hard against me and I grinded next to him which seemed to please him while he left my mouth, burning with a wanting for more while my sex clenched as he took control of my body putting his arms around my back and they were free to go anywhere. I wouldn't dare stop him.
A second later, he laid me on the bed and hovered over me before taking my shorts off in a whirl and pushed my underwear off me that it didn't seem reusable. I anticipated his actions but he pushed a thumb into my bottom without no warning and I clutched the sheets, a yell escaping my mouth. My fingers curled meanwhile his other arm grabbed my breast cupping it and a second later his forefinger and middle finger slipped inside of me and my grip on the sheets tightened.
"Shh", he hissed in my ear and I hadn't realized a moan had escaped my mouth. My whole body rocked in less then a minute and I couldn't control my voice, I gasped for breath and I moaned even louder then before. "I didn't take you for a screamer ___", Namjoon seemed amused while embarrassment washed over me as I laid exposed in front of him.
"Let me go down on you", I told him and he looked taken aback as I pushed myself up.
"Do you really want to?", he asked and I shifted closer to him, placing a gentle kiss on his lips.
"I would love to", I told him. "Do you want me to?", I asked him.
"Yeah, I mean yeah", he said when his phone rang echoing in the room and his face flushed into irritation as he looked at me and I nodded gesturing him to take it. He took it out of his pocket and answered it. With every word he spoke, his irritation grew. He hung up the phone call. "Where's the wardrobe?", he asked me and my eyes pointed behind him.
Namjoon opened my wardrobe and took out a very lose t-shirt of his choice from my stack of comfortable clothes. He held my arms and slipped the t-shirt on me, pulling me close. He stroked my face and he smiled in my face which forced me to smile as well.
"Am I suppose to expect something from you or should I forget this?", I asked him as his fingers tucked the few strands of my hair behind my ear.
"You're supposed to expect everything, don't dare forget it", he whispered in my ear, nibbling on it and I couldn't help but giggle. "I want to talk to you but I've to go now and I hate it", he smiled at me.
"Okay, go", I told him and he chuckled before letting me off him and he wore his shirt back on.
After seeing him off and taking a shower, I laid back on the couch in the living room thinking about everything that had happened. I didn't regret it, I wasn't thinking much about it anyway.
The guys I'd sex with or made out with, I disliked them because of their narcissism. I appreciated my ability to find guys that were a-grade assholes. I've always had this feeling that I am lacking in some sense with other people. I look normal, like I should but I get this insecurity when taking my clothes off.
I didn't knew what Namjoon thought about it and asking him would be weird. No one who knows me like him would think I am this insecure or anxious about this stuff but then a major part of it has to do with my aura, I guess?
________________
I took a bite of the sandwich that I held in my hand as I walked around the second set just nearby to the first one. I stood afar, taking a good look, even though the storyboard fits the sights I still need to frame out a rough sketch work in my head.
I took another bite staring at the beach and the path to it and then back to the set that we'd build up by man power. It was pretty accurate in my eyes but I wanted to hear from my assistant director.
I took the walkie talkie out from the pocket of my denim and pressed the centre button, "Jae-chan, where are you?"
In a second he reverted, "Ah sunbae I am near the gripper".
"Come to the road that leads to the beach", I said, before shoving the walkie talkie down in my pocket.
The sea met the sky at the far point of the horizon and how the world is full of these illusions which are not real we know but we still believe. After all there's beauty in things that you don't get. Vastness maybe?
Sea and sky — the two melancholic blues.
"Sunbae?", Jae Chan broke the chain of my thoughts and I glanced at him before looking at the sea. His breath was heavy, I could tell he ran here.
"You could have walked, Chan-ah", I said, smiling. He was really young and passionate about filmmaking but also a little silly. He's cute.
"Ah it's okay. Did you need something?", he asked politely and I shook my head. I liked the input of many people on the same thing, it showed the number of opinions that could centre around one thing that you make in a different context which is then perceived in another.
"Do you think this is accurate in terms of the story board?", I asked him and he seemed lost in thought.
"I would say slightly better because the storyboard is still animation and this is real so I would say better. I'm pretty sure it'll be good sunbae", he told me and I could feel a smile flush on my lips. "You are nervous, aren't you?", he asked me.
"Yeah", I wrinkled my nose, turning around to walk off. I patted Jae Chan's back and he started walking with me.
"You don't have to be, and oh, he's here", he said assuring me and I knew who he meant by he.
My mind automatically went to the day in my apartment. Namjoon had messaged me after but he got busier with his work and I am not a text-er plus I'd a lot of things to do before I left Korea. It was, I didn't knew anything and I didn't want to think about it. I hoped he'd pretend nothing happened, please. But I knew he won't.
I sighed and as I entered the main set, around the vanity and food truck, the manager and Namjoon's staff members greeted me. After that, I mean impractically I wanted earth to open and swallow me. Living is hard anyway.
I'd a flight on the weekend, I'd to pack and I'd to get new boots but I'm just dumb because I'm trying to think of other things. I need a new nail paint, do I? I looked at my nails which were painted black. Maybe grey?
"Sunbae?", Jae Chan shook me and I looked at him. He gestured me to look up front and Namjoon was right there looking like Namjoon.
"Hi", I awkwardly waved at him.
"Hi", he flashed his dimple smile at me. His dimple smile hits me.
"You can get the makeup and hair done, I've a few things to recheck", I excused myself. This is awkward. This is so awkward. I hate it.
Δ
Even though I had that awkwardness lingering around but we were nearing to the end of the shoot which went really good because everyone worked so hard. It was mostly one-takes and the lighting supported the whole setting making it so easier for us to finish.
Moreover, it was a while since I had done a music video so it felt good being back on a set like this. Namjoon looked really good with the styling and although I knew the outfits pre-shoot, he still looked better then I'd imagined him to look which enhanced the whole vibe of the music video. He owned earthly tones.
That's why casting and styling is so important. Very much. Makes a gigantic difference.
"What's wrong with you?", I didn't notice he was standing next to me with a small fan in his hands while we prepped for the last shot.
"What's wrong with me?", I asked him, as I adjusted the frame in the main camera. I didn't want this conversation especially right now, especially here.
"I mean...you knowww?", I could feel his stare while I shifted the camera, something is wrong with this.
"I don't know", I said, without looking at him. I was unintentionally making him mad and nothing else.
"I was really scared that you'd say this and see, I mean, why can't you behave normal when I mention anything about us?", he hissed near me and I looked around. Luckily there was no one in our proximity to hear this conversation.
"I-I, Namjoon", I exclaimed, vaguely pointing at the setting hoping we could do this later and I could explain that I would love us but he needs to understand that I won't even be in Korea as much as he thinks I would be and that's why it won't work out.
"I don't care", he eyed me.
"I do. I care, okay? There's no us to begin with and I know I was stupid enough to ask you what I should expect out of, what would you call it, we made out. That's that", I tried being really slow and I could feel annoyance in his sight.
"Made out! Okay, okay fine. I can't believe I deal with you. You're the one who doesn't text or call or even respond to it and that's bare minimum ___", he pondered and I internally rolled my eyes.
I was leaving on the weekend. I was always leaving. That's it. "I don't have to and I have a life Namjoon. I've been working non stop all this time. I don't expect you to understand", I said, standing up from my seat while I called for the head DOP from the walkie talkie.
"You don't want to be understood ___", Namjoon said, grabbing me from my arm and stopping me. He wasn't wrong. A few eyes snapped and I forced a smile immediately. "I like you, I like you a lot. Deal with it", he walked past me.
Deal with it.
As if.
Very abruptly, the last shot rolled in and it was over. The music video was done in a day. It was originally a two day sketch but we had to narrow it down to one day because of Namjoon's schedule and it was worrisome because it did seem impossible but things went smoothly and it was successfully over.
I told Jae Chan to wrap the filming site, though most of it was done while I was present. I picked my bag from a table to leave, kept right ahead from the vanity. Namjoon had left, I guess. I wasn't sure because after the last shot he was angry. He had his jaw clenched all that time, he barely managed to keep it out on the music video.
He was like this, his anger was pretty evident and that hadn't changed.
I like you. I like you a lot.
I couldn't wrap my head around that thought. Did he like me all this time? It sounded pretty crazy to me. I had never thought about anything with Namjoon. He was a friend I could like but I didn't, I had never expected anything out of my acquaintance with him anyway.
"You ate?", his deep voice made me look at him who stood at the steps of the vanity. He hadn't left yet.
"No", I said. He had changed into his normal clothes, the makeup was gone but he still looked great. His natural complexion was shining as the set lights fell onto his face. It made me surer how Namjoon needed someone who could be there rather then somebody who's never there.
"Come eat something", he said calmly. He looked much composed then before.
"I am not hungry", I stated just when he darted towards me. He held me by my forearm, dragging me into the vanity which was empty except for us. A few dishes were laid out on the table in front of the small couch.
"Eat and leave", he said, taking a seat on one of the chairs in front of the mirrors fidgeting with his phone while I quietly sat on the couch. I just wanted it to be over but I'd no appetite so I kept staring at the couple of Italian dishes which were pasta, carbonara I guess, rissoto and also jjangmyeong. "Just eat anything ___", he said, without bothering to look at me.
"I don't really have an appetite", I said, throwing my head back and looking at the ceiling of the vanity.
"What you've is a habit of skipping meals", he eyed me.
I looked at him. "Do you remember everything? Like literally everything?", I asked him as curiosity brimmed in my eyes.
"You don't?", he asked me back. "Well, for me, yeah I do. I did remember every thing but I should probably forget now. I didn't really asked to work with you because I wanted something but I can't say I didn't hope", he locked his phone and kept it on the space in front him. "I mean, we did had something. We did have something a few days ago. You can't exactly call me a friend and I've never seen you as one. The moment you walked in trying to fix the mess on the set since then till now I can't say I didn't hope you'd look at me the same way", he said, bringing all the memories back alive, but it was true, I never looked at him the way he'd wanted me to, hell, I couldn't believe it one bit. "It's true", he said, as if he just read my mind.
It was, it didn't made sense to me. How could he? Why would he? I uh, I think shit's wrong with me because even now I can't seem to focus on someone who confessed their feelings and that someone being Namjoon from all people.
I remember when I was one of the assistant directors under the director for one of the most low-key and low budget project. They didn't had many resources and our firm wasn't doing well either. We always had to come up with hacks, unknown locations for shooting...it was always so hard. We didn't had any respect in the industry.
It was two companies in one boat at the end of bankruptcy and we were so young and such good friends. I knew the rest of the members too but I kind of had a certain vibe with Namjoon. He could get me without having to speak.
I locked at him, his face was fixated on me and I could like him, in fact I did love him not romantically, I just did. I had a lot of love for him. He was caring for the people around him and I loved talking to him. He never once made anyone feel like he was a celebrity back then and a global celebrity now well yeah. He did deserve someone who could be here for him.
He stood up and walked towards me and my eyes followed him. He took a seat next to me and I could see he picked a bowl up but I didn't see which one because I couldn't stop looking at him. Namjoon took a significant amount and extended it to me and I looked at the noodles for a second and then at him. He just nodded and I ate it.
It was good.
"Thanks", I said, wiping the corners of my mouth with my fingers.
"Do you want me to feed you all the way or can you eat your own?", he asked me.
"I will eat", I told him and he gave me the bowl so I could eat on my own. "You ate?", I asked him and he instantly nodded.
"You're going somewhere, aren't you?", he asked me and I felt as if I've just been struck with something.
"Hmm", I said, my mouth almost filled. "And, I...I want to tell you something like adults and clear it. Namjoon you know my work and I am always not here, never. It's useless. Trust me on this, it's not like that but you know you'll need someone beside you and I can't be the one", I told him, calmly, before gulping water down.
"I know that but I'm okay with it. In fact, we would go hand in hand better because I can't take you out on exotic dates as well. This is what you get", he vaguely gestured at the vanity and I chuckled and he warmly smiled at me.
After a second, I spoke much seriously then before, "It will be hard and you know that. It'll be frustrating. You could hate me".
"If you've tired it with someone before, I am not exactly happy knowing this, but you shouldn't compare me with some random dude with a peculiar taste in leather clothing", he rolled his eyes, shifting his back comfortably.
"Hey! Don't be mean just because you see stuff on my Instagram", I scoffed and he maintained his long face.
"No really, what do you take me for? You think you won't have time for me? I won't have time for you", he went on.
"Namjoon", I dragged his name. His tendency to be sarcastic at odd moments is unmatched.
"Don't call my name like that", he stared at my eyes.
"Like what?", I asked him.
"Like you can love me", he said.
"I...you don't have to be like this", I said, keeping the empty bowl on the table.
"Give me a chance then, try it out. I would wait for you I promise", Namjoon took my hand in his and covered it with his warmth.
"Will I be able to...wait?", I looked away from him, thinking about it so hard.
"___ don't think too much. I promise, we'll be fine", he said, his hands travelling to my waist and before he could grab it. I screeched closer to him. I cupped his face and attached my lips to his, while his hands held on my body.
________________
My relationship with Namjoon was better then I imagined it. I tried my best to be there for him and he was surprisingly almost there for me but it wasn't exactly easy.
It was months and months of hardships and Namjoon was more needy then I thought him to be, he needed a lot of assurance. I don't understand the notion that he holds of everyone wanting me so he needs to be extra careful. I still don't get that his insecure ass doesn't trusts his own members, he won't let me meet them at all.
He was really different. He shifted from dominant to romantic in one second. I loved that. I kind of missed it so much.
He held my hand I could feel it by the way his skin felt against mine, he whirled me around and in a second his hand rested on my waist as he urged me to walk next to him. He was in a perfect disguise and I looked at him. I could tell he was smiling beneath his black mask.
"See, this is why I don't trust other guys! How could you let someone do this to you in the midst of the road in a foreign country?", he asked me.
"No stranger would confidently do this to anyone in a foreign country", I playfully hit him on his leg and he stopped, pretending to be gravely hurt. "I can't believe you", I looked at him as I went with his act. I supported him in standing completely. In a second, he intertwined his fingers with mine.
"I missed you", he softly whispered in my ear.
"I missed you too", I whispered back, softly. I pulled him in an empty alley and pulled his mask down. "I need you to do something", I told him, nibbling on his ear and I could feel my skin feel the heat that it yearned for since a couple of months before him going on tour.
"Right now?", he asked surprised.
"Yeah, right now", I said and I could feel him harden against my pelvis.
"You are...so, not right now. Let's go to your hotel room. I'm still famous", he pulled me closer and I chuckled. He turned me around, pulling his mask down, he kissed me hard. His mouth pressed against mine. I held him tightly and he gasped. "I love you", he softly said before pulling his mask up.
"I, you", I held his hand again.
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TMBS Book 1 Brain Dump
~An Embarrassingly Long Post~
I don’t know why I’m writing this or why I’m so determined to do it. Maybe to finally assume my true form and become a mega dork on main, or maybe just for fun!
This is basically a compilation of all the main points running through my head after reading The Mysterious Benedict Society (2007) for the first time. Rather than posting a ton and spamming the tag, everything’s here in one neat package! (hopefully this gets it all out of my system rip)
Contents:
The Book Itself
The Book Itself, for real this time
The Characters
A Funny Parallel
The S.Q. Section
Lines & Scenes I Liked
Spoilers abound!
The Book Itself
Upon acquiring the first three books (don’t judge me pls), I was surprised at just how long they are. Like, they’re still pretty light being paperbacks and all, but these books are hefty lads.
The first book has this Disney+ Original Series circle thing printed on it, which is kind of unfortunate. Regardless, I love the cover illustration and yellow is actually my favorite color :D It made me weirdly quite happy whenever I saw the book lying around in my room
Also, it’s really cute how there’s a letter from Mr. Benedict at the end! (It only reveals that you can find out his first name if you “know the code”, meaning the bit of Morse printed below the summary on the back.) Shock and horror, though, as I realized I’m starting to recognize some of the letters
The Book Itself, for real this time
It’s wonderful how the tone of the book really shone through to the show adaptation. Something about the deliberateness of the aesthetic, from the set designs to the fashion to scene compositions, that really sells that particular style— like it’s very clear that this story is being told to us, rather than one we’re seeing unfold, if that makes sense.
Where that narration style stood out to me the most was the first chapter. We are told (rather than shown) how Reynie gets himself to the point of the second test, and there’s this whole twisty time maneuver for that whole sequence of events that’s really interesting
A super secret fun fact about me is that I wanted to be a writer when I was younger! So this particular balance of show vs. tell is really neat, since it runs counter to my own tendencies. The sheer amount of commas in every sentence is also kind of comforting, since Ahah, I Do That in those few serious-ish attempts at writing lol
Overall this book’s style reminds me a lot of Roald Dahl’s books, which are very nostalgic for me :D The whole “kids are more competent than adults” angle helps a lot too haha
The Characters
Oh boy here’s where I get a little bit critical! Overall I did really like this book!! it’s just that that expresses itself in all this weird “”analysis”” lol
Reynie - much better in the books than in the show
It’s sort of a lukewarm take but I feel like show!Reynie is kind of boring? He doesn’t have a lot going on flaw-wise, and obviously since he’s the protagonist he can’t have too many weird traits or else the kids watching can’t project themselves onto him as easily
(I call it the difference between an aspirational protagonist and a vessel protagonist. Going off of the Roald Dahl vibes, think Matilda vs Charlie. show!Reynie is more of a Charlie)
Thus when we get to see him really struggle with the Whisperer and doubt himself it gives him a lot more dimension, at least in my opinion
It is a federal crime that the white knight scenes were not adapted into the show
Sticky - my son
I’ve long held to no one besides myself and my long suffering sister that Sticky is The Best Member of the Society
He happened to hit a lot of the Bingo squares of Stuff I Like In Characters: glasses, anxious, nice :), kind of a coward but ultimately is there for his friends, etc
For some reason I don’t talk about him nearly as much as you-know-who, but I love him just as dearly
Kate & Constance - I don’t have much to say
Kate is really interesting in this book! I like how we get to see more of her depths, in particular that one passage about her belief that she is invincible being the only thing that keeps her from falling apart? :c
Also her constant fidgeting is relatable lol
Constance is somehow a lot more tolerable in the book. I think I’m just one of those people with no patience for small children, unfortunately lol
(Some of) The Adults
It’s interesting that they had such an offscreen presence for most of the book. Giving them more time was probably one of the stronger changes of the show
However if that decision was made at the expense of the white knight scenes I think the choice should have been clear
I like the way Rhonda and Number Two are written
Milligan always on sad boy hours 😔✊
The “mill again” passage is touching but kind of messes up the pacing of the getaway, at least for me. Maybe I should read it again to make sure I didn’t miss something
Miss Perumal is much better in the show. We see so little of her in the book she doesn’t function well as an emotional anchor for Reynie, imo
The Institute Gang
Jackson and Jillson serve their purpose well, and Martina was surprising to say the least. I like the direction they took her in the show! I can’t imagine how funny it must have been to watch the tetherball subplot come out of nowhere lolol
These sections were written out of sequence, so random tidbit I couldn’t fit in The S.Q. Section: I like how he stumbles over his words. relatable
Mr. Curtain
While I think I know why they decided to not give Curtain the wheelchair in the show, we were totally robbed of Actor Tony Hale’s performance for the reveal during the final confrontation
Speaking of the wheelchair, it’s such a powerful symbol of his need for control or rather, his fear of losing it
The Contrast between him and Mr. Benedict. This point is expanded on in A Funny Parallel
Mr. Benedict
Oh boy, Mr. Benedict… How do I say this
I find it hard to trust Mr. Benedict, unfortunately
I mean to say, I do in the sense that I know he would never hurt the kids, thanks to knowing that a) this is a children’s book series and b) the meta (tumblr) states that he is really nice and lovable and stuff, but seriously. Why do the kids trust him at first?? I probably missed something somewhere
I like to think I’m an optimistic person, but unfortunately I’m also super paranoid. The premise of “a bunch of vulnerable orphans team up with a strange old man” is just so odd to me I don’t know how to explain it
I don’t know!!! I really want to trust Mr. Benedict
One of the strengths of the show is that we get to see him more often, and thus he gets to acknowledge more often that the plan is weird and that he feels really badly for putting the kids in danger and that he’s trustworthy and genuine
But his lack of presence for most of the book just makes him into something of a specter, invisible and unknowable, speaking only in riddles from across the bay
Which is why the white knight scene is so important!! I loved that scene ;-;
Because here’s an actual emotional connection! We can actually see it happening, rather than only being told that it exists
Reynie asking for advice and receiving encouragement, in words that demonstrate that Mr. Benedict actually cares about him and worries about him and agghh
It is a federal crime that the white knight scenes were not adapted into the show
But overall this whole issue didn’t ruin my enjoyment of the book at all! It’s just ->
A Funny Parallel
Okay, ready for my biggest brain, hottest take ever??
Mr. Benedict and Mr. Curtain…. are… the same
I mean obviously not entirely, given that one is benevolent and kind and the other is… Mr. Curtain
But seriously. Genius old man seeks out children (mainly orphans) to enact a plan. Said children often end up incredibly devoted to his cause and deeply admire him this is a little flimsy
Undoubtedly that’s intentional and is supposed to show the difference between them, like some kind of cautionary tale? “Let yourself be vulnerable and let others help you, lest you turn eeeeviiillll”
I guess that’s where the aforementioned epic contrast comes in. You get Mr. Curtain, strapped into his wheelchair and hiding behind those mirrored sunglasses, terrified (but unwilling to admit it) of ever showing the tiniest hint of vulnerability, vs. Mr. Benedict, who can let himself fall knowing that someone will catch him :’)
Anyhow I have nothing against the parallels, I just think it’s funny
The S.Q. Section
The S.Q. Quarantine Thread so it doesn’t leak out everywhere else <3
I’d like to meet the emo angstlord genius who read this book and decided to make SQ into Dr. Curtain’s son. What in the world
Okay I should probably preface this by saying that I absolutely adore both book!S.Q. and show!SQ with all my heart. Somehow, despite being a completely different character in both mediums, he has managed to be one of the best characters in either and certainly one of my favorites (besides Sticky of course) in the entire franchise, despite the fact that I’ve only read the first book/watched the show so far. I am confident in this statement.
But seriously! How?? Why?? I could probably write a whole other essay about why show!SQ is such an interesting character, and the change works so incredibly well. I’m just. Baffled
Okay, focus. book!S.Q. is such a sweetheart, oh my goodness. Like, 100% one of the most endearing characters in the book. Poor guy. I don’t even know where to start!!
He just seems to be a genuinely good guy at heart, despite being technically one of the bad guys. He’s genuinely happy for Reynie and Sticky when they became Messengers and helped Kate when she “fell” and was concerned about Constance when she looked sick and how he was in that meeting with Mr. Curtain and Martina?!!? aaahhhhghgh ;-; he just wants people to be happy TT-TT
Comparing him against literally every character at the Institute is probably what makes him so endearing tbh. When everyone else is so awful to the kids, it really makes him stand out. Like a cheerful little nightlight in the worst, most humid and rank bathroom you’ve ever been in
It’s kind of pointless to theorize about a book series that’s already concluded (I think?) but. Is the implication of S.Q.’s forgetfulness supposed to be that Mr. Curtain used him in brainsweeping experiments somehow? The timeline probably definitely absolutely doesn’t line up but like. How did he get to being a Messenger being the way he is now, given how cutthroat the process is? And then of course Mr. Curtain keeps him around as an Executive because he’s fun to mess with and presumably his loyalty. I’m very curious as to how their relationship develops in the other books, if at all. Those are probably where the seeds of the “let’s make them family” logic were planted
But wouldn’t it be hilarious if the reason we don’t know what “S.Q.” stands for in the books is that he just. Forgot
Another thing that occurred to me. Given that he and the other Executives were Messengers at some point, what were their worst fears? What is S.Q.’s worst fear?? Inquiring minds need to know
One last horrible little anecdote: I was thinking about book!S.Q. while eating breakfast, as one does, and suddenly it hit me.
I want to believe The Author Trenton Lee Stewart had the name for a character, S.Q. Pedalian, and was like, “Hm! What sort of quirky trait should this young fellow have?” Because, of course, in this style of fiction every character has to have at least one cartoonish or otherwise distinguishing trait to stand out in the minds of children. (For instance, Kate has her bucket, Sticky has his glasses, Constance is angry, and Reynie is Emmett from the Lego Movie)
Anyhow, he looks around the room, searching for inspiration. Suddenly he comes across a jumbo box of plastic wrap. Completely innocuous in design, save for one line of text. 300 SQ FT.
“…large… S.Q. …feet? THAT’S IT!” i’m sorry
Lines & Scenes I Liked
In no particular order!
Sticky quotes Sun Tzu, The Art of War
Evil combination aerobics/square dancing in the gym with the Executives
Everyone being happy at the end :’)
Everyone partying after Sticky reunites with his parents, and later finding Mr. Benedict asleep at his desk from the moment they shook hands :’’)
Literally any scene with Sticky in it
Any time Kate says “you boys” or “gosh”
[“Um, sir?” S.Q. said timidly, raising his hand. “A thought just occurred to me.” / Mr. Curtain raised his eyebrows. “That’s remarkable, S.Q. What is it?”] clown prince of my heart </3
S.Q.’s determined monologue about searching for clues after he bungled up the first time
Literally any scene with S.Q. in it (please refer to The S.Q. Section)
Reynie trying to resist the Whisperer.
[Let us begin. / First let me polish my spectacles, Reynie thought. / Let us begin. / Not without my bucket, Reynie insisted. He heard Mr. Curtain muttering behind him. / Let us begin, let us begin, let us begin. / Rules and schools are tools for fools, Reynie thought.]
NO MORE HURTIN’ WITH CURTAIN
Milligan showing up on the island!!
Remember the white knight hhhhhh
“controle”
A Super Secret Bonus Section
I would be extremely surprised if anyone read through all the way down here lol. Regardless, here’s a little acknowledgements section :D not tagging anyone since I don’t want to bother all of these people
Special shoutout to tumblr blog stonetowns for unknowingly yet singlehandedly demolishing my reluctance to read the books by posting a ton of cute quotes. Thank you for your service o7
Thanks to the two OGs that liked the post I made right before this one, for being my unwitting enablers and for sticking around despite being a) technically an internet stranger (hello!) and b) someone I haven’t spoken to irl in literal years (hey!!)
Last but not least thankz 2 my sister for putting up with me ranting about the book when I first got it and for asking about “CQ” sometimes lol. (i desperately hope you’re not reading this orz)
#the mysterious benedict society#this took me like three days to finish rip#it’s worked though! i feel less of a Mighty Need to think about this stuff constantly now#however!!! today through some conniving i have gotten the Second Book#now I’m at 3 out of 4 infinity stones. muahahaha#was going to include my villain origin story about why i like show!SQ so much but cut it for being too long and irrelevant. however#if the words jeff naomi and Sweet Dreams are Made of These mean anything to you please hit me up. it’s kind of a funny story
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How to screenshot Part 1.
I don't mean to toot my own horn, but I've been told on more than one occassion "I wish I could take screenshots like you" and "oh my god youre so good at screens." and I always tell people the same thing - "Practice practice practice."
Case in point:
(Yes - thats my archive where I store my ffxiv screenshots. Yes, the folder for 2018 has 5,756 files. Yes. that means 5,756 screenshots.)
But that doesn't mean that there aren't certain things to bear in mind when taking eye-catching screenshots. Yes, there are tools out there that will help you along the way - multiple mods exist, as well as Reshade, but an artist is more than the tools at their disposal. There are certain things to look out for that no addon or reshade setting will fix for you.
Of course, by no means is this the ONLY way or the BEST way to take screenshots. I am just here to walk you through a part of my process.
PART 1. Camera Angles, Distractions, Color Filters and Body Language.
Lets start with an amateur screenshot.
This is a picture I have seen a million times - a male miqo’te in the quicksand. ORIGINAL. Of course, this is my own character @rgael looking rather unfortunately BORING in this shot. I see this exact shot SO often when people are making a new character and wanting to make RP connections. It physically pains me when I see this picture.
So whats wrong here.
1. The composition is boring
2. Distractions
3. He’s blending in
4. No expression, a basic bitch pose.
These 4 issues are what I’m going to tackle in this tutorial - how to overcome each of them.
So lets start at the beginning. The composition. Dull. Boring. There is a time and a place for having a character placed in the direct center of a screen, with a head-on camera angle like this - but cool screenshots is NOT IT!
Distractions. - I hate those lamps. They offer nothing to the overall image. They’re not aesthetically pleasing - theyre not even symmetrical. Theyre brighter than he is, leading your eye away from him.
He’s blending in. There is nothing eyecatching about this, the picture has very little contrast.
No expression. A Basic bitch pose. Look, lets not kid ourselves. This is a stock miqote pose. Everyone can do it. and many do. Body language is so important, and there’s nothing about this that portrays R’gael the way I want to. From this view, there appears to be NOTHING unique about him - and why would that capture ANYONE’S attention? It wouldn’t. And it shouldn’t. this is a bad screen.
Now, lets take that EXACT same pose and location and see what we can improve on.
Just zooming in, we’re already looking a bit better. At least we can see his face clearly. The lamps are cut out, but I’m not crazy about that railing to the right. Still, the colors are kind of washed out, and Gael’s most striking feature is his eyes - I want to draw attention to his eyes whenever I can.
So lets discuss color filters for a second.
THEY ARE MOSTLY TRASH.
I only use a few of gpose’s color filters - ever.
There is no official rule when some will be better than others. It depends on your subject matter, the time of day, etc. These are the only effects I use, ever. Anything thats crossed out is either never used, or used by me so little that its not even worth including on the list.
I like Colored Marker 2, Pastel 1, and Pastel 2 the most.
Lets try Colored Marker 2 in this picture.
Nice.
It’s a subtle effect, but his eyes are brighter, the contrast is a bit higher. we’re getting closer to a more acceptable screenshot. Lets mess with the angle.
By just adjusting our camera angle a few degrees, we’ve eliminated the annoying distractions. Also note how the lines in the background are literally guiding the eye to the focal point of the image - his face. This is already looking a lot better as a portrait, but its still kind of boring to me.
This is looking better. As a portrait, this is much more expressive. His body is turned one way, but his face is looking another. The expression is unchanged technically, but there is a billion times more emotion shown here.
PROTIP: You can use the spacebar in gpose to make your character look at the “camera” in many poses - try making them look one way, then adjust the camera angle after. They dont always have to look at the camera, that gets boring.
Just look at the comparison tho.
for emphasis - I didn’t change anything the character is doing - its the same pose, in the same location, with the same expression.
Lets do it again - this time I’m picking another location. Gael wears a lot of black, and I want him to stand out. I’m going to go somewhere bright - I have an apartment in the mists, so I’m going down to the beach.
Cool its raining.
So since its raining. I���m gonna go for something angsty. Lets try crossing our arms and being sad.
the /sad emote is a little too bitch-ish for gael - so lets try /disturbed instead. Basic standing pose, /disturbed emote, and Bright 3 for that blue and moody atmosphere.
awful.
Again, dull composition.
the emotion..it just doesn’t make sense. His face says sad but his body language is confident.
And a bad background.
Play with combining emotes and expressions. The male miqo’te /doze is my go-to for R’gael. Look at what a different this makes if you combined it with /disturbed and pause it at the beginning.
This is a MUCH more interesting pose! His head is tilted to the side, his weight is shifted to the side, his ears are tilted BACK. This body language portrays emotion much better. Its way more natural. Lets play with this.
Okay, we’re head-on now. Its still not great. I can do better.
Shifting the composition to the side. by moving the camera around him - its a crisp, clean background (Though the mountain to the right is a little annoying. I would be torn about using this in a post, I feel like the mountain would bother me too much.)
Now this one I’m digging - we’re zoomed in close, its an intimate picture. It has excellent contrast against the background - we can sort of see the emotion on his face - but its concealed. We’re cropped in so close that we dont even see the top of his head - its very personal. We’re up in his shit. I like this one. I would use this.
Again, these two images are the same pose, the same face, the same filter. All thats different between them is the position and angle of the camera.
I hope this has provided a little insight into some of my process. If there is enough interest, I’ll make more “guides” like this in the future. Touching on the Rule of Thirds, Tumblr Image post composition, reshade filters, Gpose lighting/screen effects, couples, color composition, choosing locations...basically whatever people want to see lolol.
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Black Woman Creator: Afiya Augustine
Hailing from the tropical isle of Trinidad, Afiya Augustine is a writer, freelancer, podcaster, and creator of Pretty Poet Ink, an online handcrafted accessories boutique. Afiya finds tons of inspiration for her work from her love of pop culture, nostalgia, history, science fiction and fantasy. When she is not crafting, she spends time listening to music, tweeting, writing poetry and prose, posting photos of her family, catching a flick, or learning something new. We spoke to Afiya about being a creator, balancing creating with a nine to five, and who some of her favorite Black women creators are.
Black Girls Create: What do you create?
I create quite a few things, actually. First and foremost, I am a writer. I’ve been writing poetry, short stories, and novels since I was twelve and have been a professional entertainment writer/editor for well over five years.
Next, I am the creator and founder of Pretty Poet INK — an online boutique of handcrafted wonders. I both design and create a plethora of things, which (at the moment) includes wearable and useable art otherwise known as jewelry and accessories. With my jewelry, I often use actual semi-precious stones, crystals, glass and wood beads, in addition to plated and precious metals. My accessories are mostly fabric-based items like bow ties, hair bows, and I’m slowly venturing into things like wallets and pouches. In addition to pieces that are of my own design, I also do custom pieces for others, usually for special occasions like weddings.
Lastly, I host a podcast, called ‘Adult-ish’, which is tackles the everyday trials and tribulations of transitioning into adulthood and all the responsibilities that comes with it no one ever really tells you about.
BGC: Why do you create?
I started creating because quite honestly, I liked it. I’ve always been a person interested in creating. I like to express the way I’m feeling through my various crafts. I use my writings to express my emotions, thoughts, daydreams, and wishes. I used my jewelry to convey a feeling, a connection to a certain aesthetic, imagery. I love the idea of bringing something from my imagination to life. It’s very calming and it's also a feeling of accomplishment to see something start as just a few beads or a thought and watch it come together as a necklace or a poem.
The same kind of goes for my podcast. I record to connect; to share my experiences with others who may have gone through the same things I have.
BGC: Who is your audience?
I create for an audience of like-minded individuals, which at times is a very small group. As it pertains to anything I write or record, I’m reaching out to an open-minded audience, individuals who aren’t afraid to push their boundaries or ask silly questions. With regard to my jewelry, a lot of my pieces are for those who are OK and accepting of something “different,” who can find a deeper meaning in the baubles and connect to them on the level from their inspiration.
For instance, I really love historical content so biographical films or movies set in different decades fascinate me and can be reflected in my work. I also love MCU and DCEU films and books, so you’ll find pieces dedicated to that. Science-fiction and fantasy are genres I’ve been reading since I was a child, so some of my pieces are emblematic of those worlds as well as countries and cultures I’ve never seen but wanted to.
Overall, everything I create is for the nerds, the historians, the world traveler, and those who can find themselves lost in fantasy and wonder.
BGC: Who or what inspired you to do what you do? Who or what continues to inspire you?
I can’t recall when I was first inspired to write. I just remember picking up a pencil and making a story. I can remember when I was about seven or eight years old, I was with my mom visiting my aunt in the hospital. She was dying of cancer and so my mom was there with her speaking to the doctors. I was moving around a lot, so my mom fashioned a little book out of medical tape and napkins. She gave me a pencil and so I wrote a little story with illustrations. I remember my aunt even peaking, asking my mom, “What is she doing?” and I just kept making my little story. Since then, I’ve just kept a pen and a piece of paper on my person at all times.
I was inspired to start making jewelry when I worked in the bead shop of a craft store. It was one of my first jobs out of college back when trying to get a job in editorial was a long shot thanks to the recession. I would glance in magazines like Beadstyle or Stringing and see all these beautiful pieces and think, “how can I inject a bit of myself into this?” I loved the color compositions, the textures, and I wanted to make them expressive of who I was and what I could do. It was about bringing something to life… even though it’s an inanimate object, proving to myself that yet again, there was something I could do. And I’m continually inspired by the idea of being able to make something new. Putting a new object into the world. A sense of pride and accomplishment washes over me with each piece. So much so that I often find it hard to sell them! It’s me saying to myself, “Yes. I made that. I can make it and I did make this.”
The podcast came out of a conversation with a friend who thought our random, off-the-wall chats would be fun to listen to and so, after meeting with a few people interested in our chatter about turning into adults, a podcast was born.
BGC: Why is it important as a black person to create?
It’s important for Black people and especially for Black women to create because there aren't many of us who can have our voices heard. It’s very endearing to hear or see another Black person creating, whether it’s a book, a comic, a clothing line. I feel like we, as a community, have a super strong purchasing power and are always hungry to consume new things and as such, we should be investing in one another. Why not lift up those who can relate to you? Who can create items for you — that not only speak to who you are, but what you are? As a Black female entrepreneur, I’m trying to reach other Black people with similar interests to let them know 1. You are not alone and 2. Here’s a way that allows you to express yourself.
For me, I feel it’s important for us to create to connect to individuals like ourselves and to do so with our creations.
BGC: How do you balance creating with the rest of your life?
Terribly. LOL. I work a full-time job that requires me to travel upwards of 4 hours a day (and 5 hours on a bad day). But I do my best to think of creating. During my commute, I might jot down an idea for a design, write down combinations of colors and shapes that I like, or brainstorm ideas on how to sell or pitch a product. I’ll spend my downtime at work scrolling through websites for ideas, tips, supplies, etc. Maybe put some in a shopping cart and save it for later.
In the past, I used to commit to writing at least one new piece of prose a week, usually about something I observed on my commute home. But that’s when I used to get a seat on the trains. Now, if I have a thought for a story or a line for a poem, I may either jot it down in the Notes section of my phone or post it on Twitter.
On the weekends, I try to record an episode with a co-host one day and craft the next day. The only thing that sucks is that I have to limit my time when the ball starts rolling because I can find myself creating well into the midnight hour. And Lord knows I need all the sleep I can get to have the energy for work.
BGC: How do you balance creating when you feel drained or exhausted?
It’s very trying to balance creating when I’m drained or exhausted because when I’m in that mood, I really want to do nothing but relax and recharge. Sometimes, I will give in, but when I realize I’ve done for too long, I will put music on and sit in front of my table. Often times, touching my supplies, organizing materials, and going through my bins with all the little goodies, brings me back.
BGC: Do you have advice for young creators or ones just starting?
The first bit of advice — learn more about your craft. Next, take your time getting into it. Find a good teacher or mentors who can help you through it. Take a class here and there and see if you really like it or not. It’s OK if you realize it’s not for you.
In the very beginning, I was so excited about jewelry crafting that I spent a ton of money on beads and didn’t know what to do with them. I was also self-taught and found myself constantly looking for tutorials on the web to guide me through. Several years in, I’m still asking the pros questions and learning new techniques as well as understanding there are just some aspects of crafting that aren’t for me.
My writing is OK, but it can always be better. To improve that, I do my best to read one of the many books I haven’t cracked open yet on my bookcase. In seeing some of the different styles, vocabulary, structure, etc. I can better find my own voice.
BGC: Who are some other Black Women creators you admire?
Well, one is definitely my mom. She’s a seamstress and has been working a sewing machine for as long as I can remember. She’s also pretty handy with a glue gun when she’s ready, though I’ve probably surpassed her in that area. Other women I know include Tandeka Fable of Fabl Design and Shirley Blanc of SincerelyMe Sweets, both of whom are crushing it with their startups.
Women I admire from afar include Lorraine West of Lorraine West Jewelry, a handmade luxury brand based in NYC, as well as actor/writer/director Issa Rae because she’s hella dope. I’ve been admiring this woman since Awkward Black Girl on YouTube, and she even gave the OK for me to send her some of my jewelry pieces! Who doesn’t love her, like seriously?! (Holla at me if you want more pieces, Issa!)
BGC: What are your future projects?
My future projects include expanding Pretty Poet Ink into several brands. As I previously mentioned, I do custom work for special occasions and am looking to bridge that into a bridal brand where I will be making custom bridal pieces and accessories — veils, bouquets, brooms etc. In the not-so-distant future, I’d like to venture into home decor. It’s my dream to have people not only wearing but living with Pretty Poet Ink around them.
Also, I would ultimately love to finish and publish at least one novel, and a chapbook of poetry. And when it comes to podcasting, I’m hoping to land a spot on HBO or Showtime like some other famous podcasts out there. If not that, at the very least a live recording at a little bar with our few faithful fans.
You can shop Pretty Poet Ink here and subscribe to the brand on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram as well as find all her editorial work on her blog. You can also listen to the Adult-ish podcast on Google Play, iTunes, Spotify, iHeartRadio, Soundcloud, and Spreaker. Check out Adultish on Twitter as well.
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USA; Michael Moss Accidental Orchestra HELIX CD Release Show Friday, May 18th 7-10 PM Westbeth Community Room
CD Release Party for
Michael Moss / Accidental Orchestra:
HELIX
Friday, May 18, 2018
7-10 PM
Westbeth Community Room
155 Bank Street entrance
(between West St. and Washington St.)
New York, NY 10014
Tickets:
$10 donation
New CD
Michael Moss the Accidental Orchestra HELIX
(4th Stream Records ERG 10013)
Street Date: March 24, 2018
Jason Kao Hwang, Rosi Hertlein, Fung Chern Hwei (violins), Stephanie Griffin (viola), Lenny Mims and Carol Buck (cellos), Steve Swell (trombone), Vincent Chancey (French horn), Waldron Mahdi Ricks (trumpet), Richard Keene (oboe), Elliott Levin (flute, tenor saxophone), Ras Moshe Burnett (soprano and tenor saxophones), Michael Lytle (bass clarinet), and myself, Michael Moss (Bb clarinet), Steve Cohn (piano), Billy Stein (guitar), Rick Iannacone (ambient guitar), Larry Roland (string bass), Warren Smith (percussion, vibraphones), Badal Roy (tabla), Chuck Fertal (drums),
and Michael Wimberly (djembe, African bells and percussion).
Listen On Bandcamp
Free Jazz Composer Michael Moss Debuts Two Major Compositions On His New Release HELIX.
Multi-instrumentalist/composer Michael Moss, a veteran of New York’s free jazz scene, has assembled a brand-new band, the Accidental Orchestra, featuring 22 of the most exciting improvisers on the jazz scene today. His new CD HELIX is the premiere recording of a pair of his latest extended compositions.
HELIX kicks off with “The Old One,” which gets its title from Einstein’s name for God. Moss describes this five-piece suite as “an initiation into sacred ground.” He views it as part of a musical tradition stretching from the earliest ritual over the dead to Bach’s Mass in B Minor, through Native American rites of passage into the spirit world, the Jewish mourner’s Kaddish, and Buddhist funeral rituals.
Moss wrote "See Sharp or Be Flat/C# or Bb" while recovering from a fracture suffered in tripping over a curb. The composer brings a quirky sense of humor to the situation, right down to deciding to name his ensemble the Accidental Orchestra in memory of the incident. Moss aimed to let the band swing on this contrapuntal theme and variations mixing jazz, rhythm and blues, and the joy of dance. “Throughout I refer to Norwegian Wood (The Beatles), I Feel Good (James Brown), and Bags Groove (the Modern Jazz Quartet), but do not resort to familiar big band tropes,” Moss explains. “This is a type of string orchestra, but with lots of jazz musicians pushing the boundaries.”
The Chicago-born, Madison, Wisconsin-educated Michael Moss has been an active member of the New York jazz scene for 50 years, earning recognition for his skill and imagination as a multi-reed player, and for the freshness and intensity of his writing. The self-described “farthest-out cat” was a mainstay of Manhattan’s famed loft jazz scene, playing with Sam Rivers, Dave Liebman, Paul Bley, Annette Peacock, McCoy Tyner, Elvin Jones, Richie Beirach and scores of others. He’s equally at home from a duo setting to an orchestra of 50-plus players.
As a composer, Moss assigns time signatures to segments of his pieces, but the final form of any given composition depends entirely on the interaction of the musicians. A sense of space marks much of his work. Though, like most avant artists he shifts tempos frequently and sometimes drops the meter altogether, he and the group under his direction tend to listen more and play in the openings. Though his music clearly arises from the jazz tradition, Moss draws heavily from disparate folk idioms. American blues and Latin rhythmic influences are obvious in his work, but Israeli folk melodies (out of his own Jewish origins) or Tibetan chants (appropriated on a trip to India) are equally likely to emerge in his performances. Listeners can’t help but be captivated by what they hear, as they accompany Moss and the Accidental Orchestra on this life-long journey.
"Playing free, but still playing together--it's a question of moving forward by moving backwards and sideways at the same time," Moss says obliquely, and yet the music seems to do just this, and makes sense. Robert LaBrasca, Press Connection and Rolling Stone writer (1986).
"Moss' music is conceptually complex and musically brilliant, reaching across ages, cultures and continents for rhythms, phrases, melodies, and harmonics to produce a sound which is fascinating yet unsettling because it is foreign but so familiar." Fred Waitzkin liner notes Michael Moss/Four Rivers Cross Current (1978).
What The Press Is Saying About HELIX
"This is a stunning achievement – one that demands our attention."
Grady Harp, Amazon, April 2, 2018
"This fantastic album gets a MOST HIGHLY RECOMMENDED from me, with an “EQ” (energy quotient) rating of 4.99."
"The 20:37 “C# or Bb” is not only my choice from this album, it’s also my personal favorite improvised set (yet) in 2018! All the players in the orchestra challenge the boundaries on this one, & I’ve no doubt that those of you who thrive on music that stimulates creativity (in many different directions at once) will be playing this one over & over & OVER again!"
"The orchestra Michael assembled for this stunning trip is amazing in and of itself…over fifteen minutes of far-out fun for all."
"If it’s etherspace you’re craving for in your listening adventures, you’ll find “Mind Of God” the perfect blend of cool and cacophonous."
Rotcod Zzaj,Dick Metcalf, editor, Contemporary Fusion ReviewsFebruary 27, 2018
Michael Moss Uses Experimental Jazz To Bring Helix To Life
"While there are swing elements and other traditional jazz elements, but the form here is completely experimental. This is jazz of big ideas. And probably not for beginning jazz fans. Still, there is an energy and perceptiveness that keeps audiences listening, and that might be the most important thing of all."
"From folk melodies to Renaissance orchestras, to Latin, blues and more, Moss has a nearly encyclopedic array of musical influences. According to Moss, he wants to stretch America’s musical heritage into the future while acknowledging its past innovators such as Louis Armstrong and Scott Joplin. With “Helix” it sounds as though he is doing exactly that."
"The album succeeds as an experimental album based on a theme – – listeners with traditional expectations of jazz will be surprised or disappointed. But putting traditional restraints on free-flowing experimental jazz is to miss the point of the form."
Dodie Miller-Gould, lemonwire, February 15, 2018
"If Avant Garde, free-form jazz is your preference, you will enjoy listening to the outer limits of Dr. Michael Moss’s artistic creativity. Michael Moss is a 50-year veteran of the New York “free” jazz scene. He’s a multi-instrumentalist and a composer, Chicago-born. At times, this music reminds me of the Chicago Art Ensemble, except that this production features a twenty-two piece orchestra. The Moss production is all over the place, spewing energy and combining instruments and notes in a unique and often dissonant manner."
"I was particularly drawn to the final “SEE SHARP OR BE FLAT” composition that features a provocative violin solo with complimentary string ensemble support. This composition gives more opportunity for individual players to step forward and solo. I found the guitar solo to be outstanding with Warren Smith’s percussion bright and tasty beneath it."
"If you have a taste for a project that’s out-of-the-ordinary, the Accidental Orchestra will soothe your palate."
Dee Dee McNeil,February 28, 2018
"It is a work to be heard without prejudices, reminiscent of certain episodes of the music of Anthony Braxton."
"There is everything from the more traditional jazz, with a swing of the rhythm section, to more material and abstract moments like in the long Inception, with instruments like the djembe or the tabla that give a sense of world, or the oboe of Richard Keene, with his nasal sound that stands out on the whole set."
"Between moments more free and others more tied to the mainstream Moss demonstrates its music culture and the ability to consistently put together moments inspired by different historical periods."
"A great record of this big band."
Vittorio Lo Conte, Music Zoom, April, 2018
"The music and albums of this native of Chicago are always distinguished by their originality, and often the use of elements of various ethnic musical cultures."
"In general - an excellent album for advanced fans of jazz music and, probably, quite a complex work for neophytes."
Leonid Auskern, Nestor Media, March, 2018
"Sun Ra-ish Swing"
"The Accidental Orchestra is comprised of a “Who’s Who” of the New York Improvised Music Scene."
"A dissonant, yet strangely colorful and delightful series of chords emerge with a startling intensity."
“See Sharp or Be Flat”begins with a shout of joy. It’s a jazz expression of an acceptance of all the good and bad things life throws at us."
“Bridge”swings, walks, and flows like a rich liquid, as if it is urging you to follow its path."
"Moss cultivates an intricate musical garden, then allows it to run wild, knowing quite well the trajectories each living thing will take."
"A master of multiple reed instruments, and compositions . . . Moss knows how to handle himself. His musical inspirations are not limited by genre, culture, or historical period. To transcend the constant danger of self indulgence and perform music that serves to communicate real ideas and real experiences in service of higher ideals is the sign of a master. Michael Moss and the Accidental Orchestra have accomplished this."
Dawoud Kringle,DooBeeDooBeeDoo NY, March, 2018
"MICHAEL MOSS/Helix: The loft jazz mainstay puts together an Accidental Orchestra, in which the gang is all here, and sets out for places only hinted at in “Metal Machine Music’. Using Einstein’s name for God as the jumping off point, I’ll bet this how things sound in heaven when Metatron dawdles over a second cup of coffee."
Chris Spector, Editor and Publisher, Midwest Record
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My Road to Medical School
opheliauniverse
kiss girls, make art and disappear into the forest
highlander6100
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