#I be thinking thoughts when I watch this goddamn show
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The Man 1
Warnings: non/dubcon, and other dark elements. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.
My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.
Character: mob!Lloyd Hansen
Summary: a demanding customer complicates more than your work life.
As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. I’m happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging.
You stand behind the counter, ready to serve the next customer that comes through the door. If you thought the rush was bad, the lulls are worse. The time drags by as the clock seems to taunt you. You sigh again as you hear Bre clattering around in the back room. You’d rather be back there folding up empty boxes and scouring trays.
You yawn and waver on your feet. The small local cafe doesn’t have the consistent traffic of the franchised kiosk just down the block but there are still hectic rushes. The mornings just after nine, then at noon when the office workers run out for a refresh espresso or a lunchtime sweet, but the afternoons usually deliver no more than the errant college student on their laptop or a few friends in between visits to boutiques.
The door opens and you glance over at the man who walks through the door. He strikes you as out-of-place as he struts across the cafe, hitting a table with his thigh, and sneering at it as if it insulted his mother. He’s tall with broad shoulders, and his hair is slicked back while the sides of his head are buzzed. He wears a black turtle neck under and open jacket and a pair of matching slacks that show off his ankles. His loafers are a rippling grey and black snakeskin print with a shining silver buckle.
You grip the sides of the till as he approaches but he doesn’t look at you. You stare, a little put off by his lack of acknowledgement as he peers up at the menu. He steps forward, tapping his fingers on the counter as he blows out between his lips. A golden signet ring flashes on his pinkie. You’re still not sure he’s in the right place.
“Hello, sir, can I get you--”
“Shh,” he hisses and holds up his finger. You snap your mouth shut and blink. He squints at the menu. He hums, clucking as he gives a thoughtful look to the hand-painted letters. Alright?
You wiggle your foot impatiently, biting your tongue. You’re not an inherently rude person but some customers make you wish you were. You watch him and he finally lowers his chin.
“Oat latte. Half blonde espresso, half regular, with the toffee nut syrup and a sprinkle of cinnamon.”
You nod as you punch in his order. It’s quite the drink. Sometimes you think people just pile on to see how far they can push service workers. They can’t just have a simple drink. Some even request the temperature to the digit.
“Alright, got it, it’s fifty cents for the syrup, is that okay?”
“Fifty cents?” He echoes haughtily, “no, that’s not okay.”
“Um, okay, well, it’s uh, on the menu,” you crane to look behind you, “fifty cents for a flavour shot, twenty-five for whipped cream.”
“I didn’t ask about goddamn whipped cream. They don't charge me here, doll. Get me the goddamn drink,” he demands.
You reel. Admittedly, you’re new. You’re learning but your first lesson was simple; customers are awful.
“I can just take the syrup off, I guess,” you hit the x and the whole order disappears.
“Didn’t you hear me? No charge, honey. It’s on the house.”
You purse your lips and look at him. You raise a brow. Alright, this is a new one.
“Um, if you’d just hold on, I think... uh, I should ask--”
“Yeah, you better fucking ask,” he sneers as swipes at a stack of paper cups and sends them flying. You flinch out of the way and spin to burst through the door to the kitchen.
“Uh, Bre,” you say, “there’s a really angry dude out there and he wants a free latte so uh, what do I do about that?”
She looks over at you as she puts a tray of cookies on a cooling rack. She frowns and her forehead stitches. She pulls of her oven mitt and checks her fitbit.
“Shit, it’s Thursday,” she mutters as if it’s the end of time.
“Yeah, it is, so uh--”
She waves away your words with the mitt and tosses both on the counter as she hurries past you. Confused, you turn to follow her through the swinging door. You stay behind her as she goes to the till.
“Mr. Hansen, so lovely to see you, what were we getting today?” She chimes, more lively than you’ve ever heard you. At any other time, she’s dulcet, almost monotone, completely over the cafe lifestyle.
He scoffs and his eyes drift from her to you. He pokes his tongue into his cheek, “oat, toffee nut, half blond, half regular, cinnamon on top,” he notes each element tersely, “and how about you teach this one some goddamn manners.”
He glares at you and you give a wide-eyed look. You shrug at Bre as she glances over at you. She shakes her head subtly. You take a step back.
You grab a cup and she quickly takes it out of your hands, “I got it, stay out of the way.”
You put your hands up and back away. You don’t know what you did wrong. Who is this man? He smirks and hovers on the other side of the counter as he crosses his arms over his puffed chest. Bre brews a fresh espresso and steams the oat milk.
“I’m waiting, sweet lips,” he cups a hand to his ear, his other arm still over his chest.
You look back and forth.
“Apologise,” he demands.
Bre clears her throat and you glance over, your mouth falling open dumbly.
“Oh, uh,” you face the man again, “I’m sorry, sir, I didn’t know--”
“Well, now you fucking do,” he sneers as Bre places a cup down before him and a paper bag.
“Mr. Hansen, there’s a cinnamon bun for you too. We just took em out of the oven.”
“You’re such a dear, Bre Bear,” he cooes, sending you a venomous snarl.
You cringe as he spins and strides out with his fare. You watch after him, still thoroughly perplexed. Bre wipes the counter with a cloth.
“The next time he comes in, give him whatever he wants,” she says quietly.
“Oh, I didn’t... who is he?” You garble.
“Better you don’t know. Just think of him as the boss,” she sends you a desperate look, her eyes gleaming, “if you know what’s good for you, you’ll smile and listen.”
She brushes you with her shoulder as she goes back into the kitchen. You furrow your brow and glance towards the door. The man’s just outside the windowed walls, watching you. He winks before he disappears beyond the next facade
#lloyd hansen#dark lloyd hansen#dark!lloyd hansen#lloyd hansen x reader#the gray man#series#drabble#the man#mob!au#au
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time for that age old question: is love enough to beat back the apocalypse?
Because Steve's right there to protect everybody like the self-sacrificing asshole he is help Eddie make the music he's not strong enough for yet help them all put Vecna in the ground for good this time, right?(!??!)
or: what's the song for your walkman, baby? does it even matter?
I Could Be Your Nurse (or something)
Or: Five Times Eddie Has To Ask For Help, Plus One Time He Doesn’t Need It Anymore (but asks anyway)
✨ for @penny00dreadful 💜
<<< three: sleep 🌗
🎧 🎹 four: play 🎶 🛡️
To tell the whole truth of it: it comes too quickly—Vecna’s last stand. Of course it does.
But probably, if he’s being fair: they’d never have been really ready. Not for this, and so maybe it’s best that they’re not fully healed, not at full strength when it all comes to a head, not least because that means Vecna and his petal-toothed brigade aren’t at full strength either. And that choice, for their side, is sloppy; the Party stands on the right-side-up against the attack because they have to. Vecna makes his move because—or else, Eddie’s fairly sure—because the sadistic ballsac is losing his fucking mind.
Which is terrifying, sure, but fuck if it doesn’t help their cause.
It’s actually over pretty quick, even compared to Spring Break which, while it felt like a lifetime for how much it changed Eddie’s own, it’s only been those handful of days—but it’s kinda like the grand finale at a fireworks show: everything all at once then, done. In the everything’s though: he might not like it, but Eddie’s not so foolish as to believe he’s not still too tender, still too deep in healing the finer points of being gnawed alive to be anything but a burden in the thick of it. He refuses to be sidelined, though, and he thinks it says a lot for the long-term health of this glorious impossible thing he’s…building? Yeah, he, umm, he, Eddie Munson, is building a real goddamn thing where he doesn’t even just let someone into his heart and treasures them there, no, he’s building a thing where he gives his heart and gets on new and soft and trembling in kind and they both get to work at the treasuring of something more precious than just their own vulnerable insides, but yeah, yeah:
Eddie thinks it bodes really fucking well for the hopes he has that lean hard toward forever, already, in Eddie’s chest at least when Steve looks his way as they’re planning the teams and he locks eyes with Eddie and Eddie doesn’t even get his mouth open to breathe, to plead don’t cut me out, don’t send me to Wayne to be ‘safe’ or ‘out of harm’s way’ or whatever, don’t leave me so fucking far from you my heart hurts just because it’s beating in the middle space unmoored and shaking around all bruised up with it for not knowing and I know I can’t do what everyone else can but it’ll be bad enough not being next to you please don’t push me far enough that I won’t know the moment you’re safe, just—
Steve meets his eyes, and Eddie’s breath catches before his heart trips, and then Steve speaks up—and he doesn’t, not all that often when the nerdiest among them are shoring up the battle plans—but he watches Eddie without blinking when he pipes up:
“Eddie’s on medical and audio, with Erica and Jon.”
And maybe it’s his tone—this almost wholly novel thing in Steve that’s steely and unquestionable but no one pushes, they nod and get back to work, totally seamless and, and…yeah. That’s all Eddie wanted. Best he could hope for. Just outside the gate they go through. Close enough to hold a hand on the way down, and reach for purchase on the journey back.
Steve swallows hard, and nods at Eddie before he looks away and starts gearing up, twirls his fucking nailbat so it catches the sunlight even thought the metal’s mostly rusted, now and just…Eddie hadn’t needed to say a word. And Steve wanted to send him to safety, the way his throat had bobbed made it real clear there was something heavy he’s held back but: he’d said what he said. He’d laid the line in Eddie’s favor. Eddie wants to hold him, wants to pull him close and feel him breathe, and—
Yeah. Eddie kinda feels like the way it goes is a really good sign for their future as a couple. A couple. Them. Together.
With an always on the other side of all of this that could be kinda fucking magnificent, maybe. Given the chance.
Point being: Eddie gets himself set up with at least a full ambulance’s supplies for first aid, definitely not acquired legally, and a stereo set up he really wishes someone had been kind enough to outfit him with in not-the-apocalypse, holy shit is it gorgeous, but since the strength in his hands is still a work-in-progress, he’s gotta be ready to crank up the noise as a distraction from arm’s-length. It’s actually driving him fucking crazy—or, was; it was, pre-active return to the regularly scheduled world ending—the whole not being able to make music, to translate the noise in his head into sounds on the strings but even that, even that’s been tolerable, survivable because of Steve—who he loves, he gets to love Steve Harrington holy fuck—but Steve’s not just there to be everything and more than the air Eddie goddamn breathes, to become the music just by existing, nope, he one ups that shit: he asked Eddie if it’d be enough to learn the chords he needs. So Eddie could match the words with the notes right, so Steve could be a—
“—kinda piss-poor substitute but,” Steve had shrugged for it with a crooked grin; “but even a bad translator gets a message across, and you’d know when it’s wrong so we can figure out how to fix it and—“
And Eddie’d grabbed Steve’s chin and yanked his mouth close to fucking consume that man like a soul goddamn starved.
“I’d be a shit teacher,” Eddie had mouthed against Steve’s lips after they were sucked well-swollen; “if I still can’t lift the fucking neck for more than a minute,” but Steve had heard none of it, just shot right back:
“You don’t think we’ve beat steeper odds than that?”
And in the face of that raised brow, those red lips parted, that pulse in that neck still a little bit visible like a tease: the fuck was Eddie supposed to do but dive back in and love on the man who’d somehow agreed to be his, and to claim Eddie of all people in turn?
Which is a whole other reason why everything’s gonna be fine: Steve’s gonna make music with him. Steve’s gonna be Eddie’s muse and the vessel for what he inspires. It’s gonna be like Greek fucking poetry, except it’s gonna be them.
So Eddie’s all stocked up, s’got everyone’s floaty-bone-breaky songs queued up on blast for immediate deployment as necessary, and Steve’s the last to go through—he always is, in Eddie’s experience, waits for everyone to be safely accounted for before he spares a thought for himself and it might kill Eddie one day but not fucking today, because it’s gonna be fine—
“Eddie.”
It feels a little like history repeating itself, the way Steve huddles him in a little. Henderson’s through, with Lucas and Hopper and the weird stray Russian, but it’s not like history repeating, because Eddie’s got different words to see him off with; so fucking different.
“Last time I didn’t have,” and Steve reaches, cups Eddie’s cheek, drags down to press on his chest as his voice strains hard: “and it almost killed me,” and Steve usually pinches between his eyes to keep his feelings in check but instead of using his free hand to hold back the tears he reaches for Eddie’s and laces their fingers as his voice cracks and he chokes out:
“Please,” and it’s for everything. For all the almosts from last time; for all the possibilities rife this time. For all the hopes Eddie thinks they share beyond how this shakes out.
“Exceptionally underqualified field med,” Eddie breathes, and squeezes Steve’s hand so, so hard like a promise, because it is; “exceptionally overqualified DJ,” and Steve chuckles, wet but real and it’s enough, because:
“I got it, Stevie,” Eddie bends his forehead to Steve’s to say better than with words that he’s not in this to be a hero, he’ll be right here the whole time, but that doesn’t mean he…that doesn’t mean he can help but to ask this time:
“Just,” and the breath in him punches out unexpectedly as he damn-near begs:
“Only bring me back the little things, yeah? That I know how to fix?”
And they both hear what’s said underneath it:
Don’t turn around and die down there, and kill me in kind..
And—if anyone’s keeping track—they turn out not to need it but: the way the kiss is a wholeass wartime farewell, man.
And then: Eddie waits, and fucks with the speakers for less than an hour before the earth shakes, and his heart drops, but then he hears it.
The fucking whooping of those shitheads echoing through the cracks.
And then he sees it, runs, grabs the first hand that’s clinging to the rope this time and pulls with strength he doesn’t have, is probably more a hindrance than a help but he steadies them each back on the ground and hugs them so tight, kisses more than one of them on the head or the cheek as he doesn’t pretend not to be sobbing through the laughter because they did it, they fucking did it, somehow it’s over and he loves these people and he’s so fucking happy they’re alive and safe and here and—
And the person he loves more, loves most, brings up the rear, a little bloodied, a little scratched up, dingy with the fucking air down there but smiling and Eddie…
Eddie falls into him so fucking hard they both hit the ground and just, just grab onto one another. Just hold and breathe and catch lips every few seconds like an afterthought because they feel each other’s heartbeat where their chests are pressed tight and it’s, they’re…
Steve’s got four broken fingers across both hands. None in a row. He’s basically giving a Vulcan salute by default for how they’re taped.
Eddie loves him so goddamn much it hurts.
And Eddie’d obviously known—once things start to settle in the days that’ve followed—that teaching Steve guitar with those Spock-y hands was on the back burner, but he does ask Steve to sit, and to rest, and to help hum back the tunes in Eddie’s head while Eddie jots lyrics with a hand that’s still shaky but steadying out more every day, and it’s kind of perfect, and Steve adds some things into the melodies either on purpose or by accident but they’re better for it every time and—
Muse and vessel, man. The light of Eddie’s whole goddamn life.
With fucking Vulcan hands still, though, so: excuse Eddie for being…bewildered when his boyfriend—boyfriend, that’s his boyfriend—but his taped-up-healing-Vulcan-handed boyfriend is propping the front door open and lugging in a long, not-recovery-friendly thing that looks close to dropping on his toes and—
“The fuck are you doing?” Eddie asks with a little more panic in his voice than he’d hoped for as he rushes as best he can to where Steve’s kicking the door shut behind him, fluttering his hands around uselessly as Steve maneuvers past him, leans across for a peck at the corner of Eddie’s mouth and calls—“It’s fine, it weighs, like, nothing”—over his shoulder as he settles the, the thing down on the coffee table in the living room they’ve started actually using for, y’know.
Living.
Eddie follows him in, though, because of course, he’s half-a-dog on that man’s heels, whole-caught-in-the-gravity-of-his-everything: but Eddie follows as Steve tosses himself backward with something in his hand, rolls and rucks up his fucking absurd Hawking Middle tee across the sweet curve of his hips, the way the soft give of skin tempts Eddie to run his tongue over the trail of almost-curls, like baby-curls where they lead under the waist of his jeans: Eddie would happily volunteer to survive on the taste of that musky-delicate space until the end of goddamn time—
But then Steve’s huffing a breathless ha from behind a chair where he’d been stretched to reach and a light catches Eddie’s eye from his periphery where he’d been staring unblinking just at Steve: the big long black thing on the coffee table. It takes a genuine concerted effort not to keep at the Steve-staring—not an uncommon state of Eddie’s existence, in all fairness—and check what’s glowing on the table: something turned on. Was plugged in, right, that’s what had Steve rolling on the floor without Eddie on top of or being deliciously pinned down by him.
The something being the big long black thing that Eddie takes in for the whole of it, now: a keyboard.
“Jon picked it up for me second-hand from the place next to Fox Photo when he drove down for his camera, and Rob vouched that it’s a good brand and like, really good condition,” Steve’s raised up on his knees, now with his hands braces on his thighs as Eddie studies the keys, fingers the ends of a every few of the naturals.
“Rob helped with those, too, so I’d know the right, like, chords,” and yeah: they’re stupa of masking tape stuck to the keys with letters in blue, black, and red pen, alternating so they don’t get mixed up, some with and arrow, Eddie assumes, to indicate a sharp.
“I only remember like half of one song from when my parents thought it would look good to have me take piano lessons,” Steve huffs in whole-ass judgment; “my mom wanted the endorsement of the guy who was stepping down from city council, and his wife taught private lessons, so, y’know,” Steve rolls his eyes; “super convenient leading up to the election.”
“What song?”
Steve blinks, tips his head in askance for what Eddie recognizes very clearly as something closer to a croak than a question, his throat all tight. He tries to cough, to clear it.
“What song do you remember?”
Steve snorts at that, leans back on his palms, and fuck is he beautiful.
“Clair de Lune,” Steve grins crooked; “the one song I was allowed to pick, instead of just being assigned.”
“Why’d you pick it?” Not that Eddie doesn’t like it or anything. It’s more that…he knew Steve could more than just drum fingers on keys, if only just, and that a baby grand used to sit in the corner where there’s a stereo cabinet now, but.
But: see, there’s like a whole half of his heart that’s dedicated to collecting new knowledge about everything Steve: his favorite food when he was 12 versus the now. How his favorite color became his favorite color. The story behind all the polos. The nitty-gritties about why he’s in a big-ass house alone for approximately 360 days a year, and how long it’s been that way. Eddie’s whole heart is basically Steve’s but every day that half overflows a little, and Eddie’s only keeping it relegated to parts filled with Steve-lore so he can feel the collection break containment every other day, this grand and joyous bursting under his ribs as everything spills over again, and again, and again until it’s all just Steve, and his heart has to burst or stretch, or both.
Eddie thinks both will be amazing.
And right now, in the interest of building toward that amazing-both: he wants to know why Debussy.
Steve chuckles to himself—better music than any dead French guy by a country mile—and eyes Eddie almost slyly.
“Do you remember Claire Reynolds?”
Vaguely. Like, very vaguely. He remembers…uneven pigtails. Very actual-cult-like vibes about her family as a vague impression and now that he’s bringing it to mind he feels a new wave of indignation: those Children-of-the-Corn motherfuckers were just fine but Eddie liked a board game and he was probably a murderer.
“When we were in like, first grade,” Steve’s continuing on; “she asked me every, single, day, to come over and see her sheep.” Steve looks up at Eddie and bites his lower lip, lets his gaze dance and lets Eddie fall into it for a few dazed seconds before he spells it out.
“She had these crazy eyes about it, it was kinda unsettling,” Steve nudges, but Eddie’s doesn’t get it until:
“And it’s not like I do now, because obviously I don’t, but I definitely didn’t speak a lick of French when I was eight.”
It takes Eddie a hot second before he snorts hard enough to hurt:
Claire, da Loon.
“I was eight,” Steve protests Eddie’s laughter halfheartedly even as he joins in, reaches to slap at Eddie’s upper arm which honestly: just makes him laugh harder.
“Anyway,” Steve fights through the last of the chuckling as it peters out between them, drags himself to sitting next to the coffee table and taps his hand to the top of the keyboard.
“I know it’s not the same as learning guitar to help, and I can probably only get the top and bottom notes with these,” he lifts his Vulcan-fingers his a shrug; “but I was hoping that’d be better than nothing?”
And, like, how Eddie was talking about his heart having to swell, for all the things he gets to tuck inside of it that come with loving Steve Harrington?
He might crack a rib, just now, because—
“This is for me?”
Steve purses his lips, lifts a brow:
“Well, technically it’s for me,” steve singles his fingers, which looks absurd with the splints; “but yeah. To help you get the songs out. I mean, once these are free again, you can help me with the guitar like we talked about, until you’re—“
And Eddie cannot be blamed, see: he cannot be fucking blamed for tackling Steve to the floor and kissing him hard enough to bruise because…
“You got hurt,” Eddie half-breathes between kisses; “you got hurt and I was so afraid I was gonna lose you,” and Eddie reaches for those taped fingers and kisses them, too: so gentle and Steve’s expression softens so quick:
“I was scared, too,” he whispers between them, cups Eddie’s face with his unloaded hand; “you were as safe as I could make you within the fucking city limits but I was still so goddamn scared.”
Cue more rib-cracking for the heart-swelling, because Jesus fucking Christ.
“And you,” Eddie exhales, slow and shaky; “you’re hurt, but you went and got,” he nods to the keyboard;
“I know it’s not ideal,” Steve’s quick to, to what, apologize? For being insane and perfect and—
“Shut up,” Eddie says, voice low and watery and he’s still kissing at Steve’s fingers, holding his wrist delicate but also like a lifeline.
“You’re hurt,” Eddie maybe kinda moans it because he hates it, as much as he’s so fucking grateful that’s it’s just this, no worse than this; “and you still—”
“I promised, didn’t I?”
And that…that’s one thing Eddie’s learned beyond reproach; that even to his detriment, Steve keeps his goddamn promises.
And he’d promised to help Eddie get his words out, to place the lyrics to the notes and help unclutter his brain so he didn’t lose his mind.
Holy fucking hell.
“Steve,” Eddie starts, shakes his head, needs to find the right words. “You’re alive,” the most important thing. “You are healing,” another most important thing, for Eddie to oversee and make sure of, even as Steve keeps an eye on the last lingering threads of the long haul on Eddie’s road to recovery in kind, his beloved mother hen.
“This is,” and he runs his fingers too light to draw sounds across the keys, hopes he sounds as awed and grateful as he feels; “but you, you’ve gotta test, you have to,” and Eddie shakes his head and lifts his eyes to just fucking ask it:
“Why?”
And Steve: Steve just studies his face for a few seconds, reads what he needs before he smiles kinda exasperated, mostly fond and answers so simply, while also breaking a few more of Eddie’s ribs when he just says:
“Because I love you.”
And Eddie’s heart’s not so overfull yet of all of Steve, it’s not fair that it just bursts right then and there, Eddie propelled into Steve’s arms to kiss him deep this time, like he’s searching out Steve’s soul to taste and maybe he is, save that he needs his heart to not have exploded for feeling if he’s going to keep the memory of it safe in his chest for always, he needs to patch his heart back up first but he’s too distracted, too drowned in the way love actually fucking feels, fucking shifts his cells around and makes a new version of him, lets his heart grow bigger except it went and blasted apart with the unprecedented immensity of loving and—
And then Eddie’s got Steve’s taped up hands on both his cheeks, and he remembers that night, in the shower, where Steve ripped the seams from his shirt so taking it off wouldn’t hurt him; notices how Steve is wearing that same fucking shirt in this very moment, all in one piece, like it never split apart in the first place.
Master seamstress, tried and tested and true; truer than anything.
So Eddie just dives back in and kisses with everything in him, thinks maybe when Steve tastes the pieces of Eddie’s blowout heart under his tongue while Eddie goes diving for the sweet lick of Steve’s soul:
Eddie thinks Steve’s mouth might know how to stitch up torn things, too. Especially the kinds that are ripped at their seams wholly for the sake of loving that fucking hard.
✨permanent tag list: OPEN (lmk if you want to be added/removed): @pearynice @hbyrde36 @slashify @finntheehumaneater @wxrmland @dreamwatch @perseus-notjackson @estrellami-1 @bookworm0690 @imhereforthelolzdontyellatme @nerdyglassescheeseychick @swimmingbirdrunningrock @goodolefashionedloverboi @sanctumdemunson
divider credits here & here
👾 title credit here
💫 ao3 link here
#steddie#eddie munson#steve harrington#hurt/comfort#whump#fluff#happy ending#angst with a happy ending#soft#pining#slow burn#(ish)#steddie fic#deep devoted caretaker steve#smitten recovering post S4 eddie#sharing a bed#sleeping together#not like THAT#HE'S RECOVERING OKAY#nightmares#though maybe it IS time to address the...crush-confession-dick-grazing-shower-thing#like: just MAYBE#love confessions#domestic fluff#5+1 things#stranger things#gift fic#penny00dreadful
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can’t help but wonder what daisy has to say about billy and his muse… hmm. i feel like she’d have some words about muse’s age, how young she is, and since she’s always starting fights with billy to begin with i can’t imagine it would do poor muse any good. i think daisy would feel some sort of kinship with her because of their shared experiences with absent parents and getting into bad situations with people older than them, i just don’t believe she would handle it responsibly 💀 wanting to help muse develop her own sound and come into herself musically outside of billy dunne and the rest of the band turns into holing up at daisy’s place for days on end and getting ridiculously high together. and i doubt billy would be too happy with his girl showing up completely strung out after vanishing off the face of the earth for a week either. hanging out with daisy feels good but frequently makes things worse instead of better. they’re so interesting i love thinking about them
I'm literally sat for this, I've been thinking about this since it was sent it and need to doscuss with y'all
okay so timeline wise I imagine muse met billy when they were still just the six but like after they'd gained some fame. obviously in this universe there's no camilla, I'd never hurt my girl more, and so billy is just a ticking time bomb of fame and ego and all of his dreams. and he's good but not as good as he thinks he is so when teddy has the idea to give an edge to the six by a collaboration with daisy jones he's still obviously very pissed but now muse is there too, there relationship is probably like 6 months old or so.
and daisy is changing lyrics, she brings so much energy into the studio, she's fun, and muse is young and I think instantly drawn to the magnetic field of daisy jones. kind of in awe of daisy which billy can't fathom because he's too busy being miffed about the whole ordeal. and in this version look at us now is about muse and billy, and daisy see's right through the original lyrics and her changes make muse feel more seen. so she listens to billy bitch and moan but secretly agrees.
and muse definitely pushes for daisy to be in the band, "billy's an ass, but everyone thinks you should join. he'll get over it eventually and realize."
and daisy is just open and honest about her thoughts right off the bat, "why do you stay with him? if he's an ass, then why?"
and muse is taken aback but also honest back because it feels right, "I don't want anyone else. not the way I want him."
daisy does get to join the band and with that she learns a lot more about muse and billy, more to dislike about the arrangement. muse is so young and attached, the only other person she turns to is eddie who obviously also wants to be with her, and daisy feels like any spark that muse has is quelled to play cheerleader for billy. and she respects that muse doesn't want to be a star but she tells her to write, or to talk and daisy will cultivate the ideas.
daisy definitely gets involved in a couple of fights that muse and billy have. "plenty of groupies to go around, don't need one wasting my goddamn time"
"don't fucking talk to her like that!"
"daisy-" you're trying to deescalate because you knows daisy and billy just make the fight worse.
"she's a person, a child, not something you get to call whatever you want when you're pissed off." daisy's turning to you, "c'mon let's go get some air, away from this asshole."
"you can't just walk out of rehearsal, daisy!" billy's calling after but you let daisy guide you.
"watch me!" and you and daisy are sitting outside, she's handing you some pill that you barely question before taking.
"you know, it's okay, it's just the way it is. no reason to fight more because of it."
"no, it's not okay. you know just because he's older and gives you what you crave doesn't mean you need him, right?"
you pause, "I know." you sigh, "daisy, I'm not a baby. I can take care of myself, I know what's going on."
"sure you do, chickadee." and suddenly it's like something lights within her and she's searching her pockets for a paper of napkin, "do you have something to write with?" and she ends up scribbling something you're not allowed to see on a napkin with your lipstick. eventually she makes it a song about you. and then your though and frustrations eventually become many many more songs.
and once during one of the breaks where they've got some time rather than muse spending time with billy she goes to hang out with daisy, which ends up being the whole of the break. she's with daisy, screaming out every frustration into metaphors daisy is scribbling out as they dance around to records taking every pill daisy can get hands on, lines off every surface, so many bottles completely empty. and whenever you just want to call billy or sometimes eddie, daisy totally encourages against it because, "you don't need them!" and when it's finally time to go back to the studio daisy has started to realize she handles highs terribly but better than you, who's not used to taking nearly as much as daisy does.
once they're stepping out of that taxi, billy's first words quickly form from a, "where the hell were you?" to a , "what is she on?" hands softly gripping your face, looking into her eyes, knowing you're gonna feels like crap later. and he's gonna end up nursing you out of a bender, daisy's kind of scared that you were so out of it by the end. so it creates another conflict when she's saying billy is horrible to you and billy brings up how she usually gets you too high to function.
let me know y'all's thoughts bc I'm definitely already cooking up more
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Hey sooo could u pls share the twitter essay here👉👈
context
thank you for the ask, I'm honored that you want to hear my thoughts on this, and thanks char for sending your anon over to me!
okay, you see the thing is, the reason I blurred it out is a bit anticlimactic: I have no actual clue what I was talking about.
I don't actually know too much about this topic of what the dynamics between dannies and phillies looked like in the past because I've only been here since november last year and have never seen someone really discuss this in depth, I've only seen it being mentioned in passing. So everything I wrote was assumptions I made based on vague posts and my general understanding of dnp's and the phandom's history.
I feel like this was enough to get the gist of this across to someone who doesn't really know dnp (apart from my previous elaborate ramblings about them) but not enough to post it on tumblr.
so if somebody has any input regarding this topic please tell me! and if I'm saying anything that's wrong (which is very likely) please correct me, I'm genuinely curious to hear thoughts on this by someone who actually knows what they're talking about :)
I will put what I wrote, along with some commentary, under the cut!
(addition: as I'm writing this commentary I'm realising how little I actually know, so please don't take this as actual information but more as...an interesting case study of how a new phannie perceives the history of the phandom)
first of all some more background info:
the original question was "[are there any people who] only like one of them and hate/don’t care about the other one?".
some shorter messages leading up to the long one seen in the screenshot:
there used to be a dannie/phillie divide but afaik all the way back in like...2013. now there are obviously people who prefer one of them but not in a way that they actively dislike the other one. and within the phandom I don't think there are really people who feel indifferent about one of them
cause yk the thing is, these days it's impossible to watch one of them alone. dan doesn't use his channel, we wouldn't even see him if it wasn't for phil and even when he did a live stream thingy for his solo tour, phil was there. and phil either includes or talks about dan in every video he makes. so I guess either you like both or neither, you don't really have much of a choice
also, they make it so goddamn obvious how much they love and care for and apprechiate each other and what an important role they play in each other's life, it would be kind of weird to claim to be a fan of one of them and then hate the person they like the most, yk
this was asked in the context of us talking about why there's this phenomenon that if you have a group of famous people who are strongly associated with each other (for example boybands or actors that work together on a tv show), there'll often be one person that is "hated" by the fandom.
Their hypothesis was that this happens when "the one hated is either problematic, doesn’t like the other(s), or is more successful than the other(s)".
okay first the relevant part of my answer:
I think overall you're right. I feel like if someone's more popular an important factor for them being disliked is that it feels like they think they're better/more important than the rest of the group.
or if they all started out together that they don't apprechiate where they've come from, which both obviously hurts people who like that thing this person dismisses.
but this also goes the other way, the people who like that person who is more famous often dislike the others in that group for being "jealous"/"leeching" off of the more famous person's fame.
and finally the thing you actually asked about, the long messages froom the screenshot broken up into multiple parts with the afore mentioned commentary:
now the less relevant part which is just me yapping about dnp and why this didn't happen to them
I can imagine that at the very beginning some people probably didn't like dan because he was just some random dude, just another fan, who suddenly was part of youtube and attached to phil.
did...did this actually happen? it seems plausible to me, and I obviously know about charlie etc but how did people really react to dan suddenly being part of the AmazingPhil universe?
I know it was an entirely different youtube culture back then and everything happened on a much smaller scale, so it's really hard to estimate how people reacted to this back then. in fact, now that I think more about it, judging from old screenshots I've seen, even at the very beginning people mostly seemed to be quite supportive of them and I think dan got an overwhelmingly positive reponse to uploading his first videos?
can't tell you exactly what went down after that but I do know 2012 was incredibly difficult (long story). things were very tense and especially dan was reallyreally defensive during that time and he had his whole "we're two seperate people" phase.
okay, so if there was any time in the phandom where there was serious tension between dannies and phillies it must've been during this time, right? because from recent discussions I know that there was a point where especially phil wasn't exactly treated the best but I don't know when that was. I feel like it would make sense here though.
anyway, at some point dan surpassed phil's subscribers and I genuinely don't know but I would assume that strengthened that dannie/phillie divide.
Again, I don't actually know when this happened (I would assume some time around 2013/14?) and I have absolutely no idea what the actual reaction people had to this was. but if I know anything about fandoms, this definitely must've stirred up...something. I don't know how obsessed the phandom was with numbers but even if it wasn't that bad, I can't imagine this happening completely without drama attached to it.
but one thing you need to know is that phil was always incredibly supportive of dan and the other way round, dan never talked shit about phil.
correct me if I'm wrong, maybe we simply don't talk about this time that much (with good reason) and I know dan said and wrote a lot of things that were very dismissive about some stuff etc. but in the clips and old posts I've seen he still emphasised that they were friends and didn't hate each other.
and thennn they started their bbc radio show, their joint channel, released a book, went on tour in 2015/16, basically they fully embraced their DanAndPhil brand. this was their peak in popularity and from what I've heard people say that joined the phandom at that time this dannie/phillie divide was basically gone by then because yeah, people liked their seperate things but what really made them blow up was the things they did together.
this is based on something I saw the other day. some people who I know joined the phandom around that time were talking about how they luckily never experienced that dan vs. phil mentality. that's why I wrote the things before this paragraph based on the assumption that the worst bit of the dannies vs phillies thing was before that era and kind of fizzled out by the time tatinof came around.
thennn the hiatus of the gaming channel, coming out (soulmates etc.), dan disappers from the internet (phil's just always there chilling btw).
okay the most interesting part comes now, dan eventually writes a book and goes on tour. alone. now if we look at our hypothesis this would be the perfect reason for people to start disliking him, but not with them.
phil goes behind dan's back to promote his book, before dan leaves on tour they make this video (https://youtu.be/2M2dF_21ANc) [edit: this is dilm in case you're wondering] where they keep talking about ohhh we've never apart for longer than to weeks oooh how will we cope blah, disgusting. dan makes a youtube series promoting the tour which phil is heavily involved with. and yeah, dan has this "I'm a strong independent dan" thing going on, but it's mostly part of his tour persona. (and also he did have to figure himself out for himself because he's been attached to phil since he was 18, so literally his whole adult life.)
I know some people disliked dystopia daily (which is valid but just for the record, I will defend her with my life) and I know some people generally didn't like/were disappointed with what dan was doing during that era. however. I know that's not representative of the whole phandom and I don't think (look at me assuming things again) those people truly hated dan for it but more like wished that things were different.
and then and then! after the tour nothing...until *drumroll* the gaming channel is back! aka, phil pushed dan to start making dapg videos again and dan's actually enjoying it. and they're fully embracing their DanAndPhil brand again.
tl;dr I think the reason why this divide isn't there between them is [because of] how vocally and explicitly they support each other.
THE END
if you've made it this far, congrats, you get a cat! ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ
I genuinely meant what I said earlier, I would love to hear more "qualified" opinions on this! feel free to add to this post, completely unravel it...or ignore it if I was too offensively wrong about things :)
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Rewatching OFMD (as one does, obviously) and I realized why Ed identifies so quickly with Frenchie, and it's not just at the party.
At the very beginning of the episode when he's hanging out with Stede, after trying to feel fancy and feeling like he'll never really get to (ie, why he was remembering his mother telling him that fine things just aren't for people like them), Frenchie walks in.
And when Frenchie walks in, he's wearing one of the fancy Frenchmen's suits, and he says," What do you think? A couple of the suits from the fancy ship didn’t have blood on them and weren’t burned up, so I nabbed ‘em."
He saw a black man walk in, and just decide to put on finery. He didn't listen to the people who would've told him that he didn't get to have it, he didn't listen to the people who would've told him that stealing posh clothes was a waste. He instead saw Frenchie step into the room, doing what he wanted and taking some finery for himself, and ask the two of them what they thought of his outfit like it was just the most casual thing. Even though he wasn't even apart of Stede's aristocratic lessons, he just chose to without fear of judgement.
Then he continues," And I found this. It’s an invitation to some kind of fancy party for hoity-toity people."
He's asking them if they want to do anything with this knowledge.
If they wanted to attend, for no reason really.
Ed got to see, for the first time in his whole life, someone like him give themselves a taste of the fine life, just because they wanted to try it, for a bit of fun. And he offered a ticket for Ed to try a bit of it himself, without any care to the whole world that told him that he didn't deserve it.
And then afterwards, Frenchie was there for him when he ran out of the dinner party, asking if he was okay, understanding the sort of thing he was feeling in a different way than Stede could, and in that finale playing a song with him so he can let his feelings out.
All that was important, too. But I think it was that first second, when he walked in the door clothed in fine fabrics with a smile on his face, that Ed really identified and attached to Frenchie.
More OFMD
#I be thinking thoughts when I watch this goddamn show#and then i cry my silly little tears#Bc it's that moment when Frenchie walks in thet Ed isn't totally alone in what he wants#He isn't the only pirate/POC who wants to experience the finer things#Frenchie walks in#With Confidence#Having Fun#Smiling#And he gets warmly offered the choice to go to the party#Even though Stede already wants to throw it away#So he takes a leap and asks why not go and see what it's about anyway#And they don't end up having that great of an evening#But he got to just decide to try it anyway#And I think that's really cool#Our Flag Means Death#Our Flag Means Death Spoilers#ofmd#ofmd spoilers#hbo#Edward Teach#Blackbeard#Frenchie#Frenchie OFMD#Stede Bonnet#Gentleman Pirate#Character Analysis#Our Flag Means Death Analysis#Our Flag Means Death Meta
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so REVENGE, HUH? or justice, if that makes you feel better. it tastes the same when cooked just right. 'I REALLY WANTED A BROTHER.' such a shame to burn a bridge you so desperately wanted to keep, especially when it wasnt even you who started the fire. especially when you hope that not a single fragment of that bridge ever washes ashore.[MAY IT ROT FAR FROM MY SIGHTS]
an unfortunate loss! atleast he has his friends.
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#jrwi prime defenders#jrwi prime defenders spoilers#jrwi pd spoilers#jrwi pd#william wisp#vyncent sol#THIS ONE IS FUUUUCKIN OOOOOLLDD RAAAHHHHH i made it like. a year ago. but didnt finish it for so so long bc i just wasnt happy w it.#BUT LIKE A CENTURY EGG the decades of being encased in salt n lime n ash have done WELL to bring out the flavores of this piece#i sorta recently cleaned it up and posted it onto twitty. didnt tag it bc it was SO OLD AND SCUFFED(i see so many MISTAKES NOW)#that i didnt want to expose it to the open air just like that#if i show smth to my small circles then it shall only be understood in those small circles.#open air and open interpretation from minds i cannot predict are NOT something i enjoy the thought of. usually. i am brave tho#BUT EVERYONE ON TWITTY WAS SO NICEEE i was like damn... i guess it IS good enough to be enjoyed by the masses...#lets work on being nicer to our art together. THAT BEING SAID. i really love my colors here HELL YEAHHHH#FIRST TIME IN A WHILE COLORIN THESE BOYS.... i dont use proper color enough..I ALSO RLY LIKE MY BACKGROUNDS HERE#i LOVE when the bg is hyperrealistic (i frankestiened stock photos) and when the subjects are all flat colored n cartoony#recently rewatched Making Fiends and they do that similar thing!! soft shading! lotsa details! almost painted? ill paint one day#ive already rambled so much abt the art im runnin out of ROOm to ramble about WWWIILLIAM GODDAMN WWIIIISP. its been a minute since i saw-#-this episode..but i DO remember the funny smoke trick that will did to his funny brother. EVERYTIME U GIVE AN ORDER. THAT BRINGS HARM-#-INDIRECTLY OR NOT. YOU WILL HEAR THOSE SCREAMS. YOU WILL FEEL THAT PAIN. OHHH WHAT A COOL PUNISHMENT THAT IS#its still an olive branch in a sense! a final chance for big bro bell to show that hes NOT an irrideemable piece o shit. and if not#well. to the wolves of psychosis with him!!! i really think william did the best he could here. if i was in his shoes i have no doubt i-#-woulda done the same. IM ALSO GLAD THAT VYN DECIDED TO STICK AROUND N SUPPORT HIM! thas character development baybe!!#i loooove prime defenders.. its been so long since i watched any eps of it but i KNOW it still has such a grip on my heart..GOTTA rewatch i
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So apparently my brain has decided to get back into Sonic again I say already 27 episodes through rewatching Sonic X. Anyway. I love my kids ESPECIALLY Chris to this day I do not understand why people hate on him so much. He’s baby
#Insert joke Chris haters DNI banner#Sonic#Sonic X#Chris Thorndyke#Sonic the Hedgehog#HE’S BABY!!! Cinnamon roll too good for this world too pure#Looking back on all the major reasons why people dislike him I watch the show and I’m like. Bro. There’s SO many things that disprove all#of the bullshit stuff people say about his character#It makes me so angry. My boy deserves better#Also can we PLEASE talk about how both Sonic AND Knuckles lost their shit when Chris got kidnapped. Ridiculous I hate them (lying)#Anyway you know what this means. You KNOW what this means.#It’s time for more GODDAMN ROOMIE AU SHENANIGANS BABY#I have SO many thoughts and headcanons. Please#Chris: I’m going to cause problems on purpose :)#Shadow:#He’s just there. Acting as Chris’ safety net for his crazy schemes. And impulsive decisions. LMAO#Also slightly off that topic but. I can’t remember if Shadow ever meets Helen. I doubt he does in canon but like#She’s literally…a carbon copy of Maria…I imagine Shadow seeing her and losing his SHIT bc he thinks it’s hee#*her#Shadow forever tortured by Maria’s lookalike copy (Helen) and her personality copy (Chris)#Shadow watching Chris accidentally blow himself up while inventing: He’s just like Maria fr 🤧#I love them. Very much actually#Shima speaks
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not me popping back on here with a post after months of semi-inactivity (uni is being a bitch) just to reiterate how much i love writing the pahkitew island cast.
aside from sammy and amy (obviously), literally everyone else can be shipped with one another and it'd make sense to some degree, like it takes skill to create a group of people so inherently shippable (platonically and/or romantically) and ofc the writers didn't know it they just shoved a bunch of random ppl together and dusted their hands off on it but fr tho 😭
(yeah im planning out my leonave 'stranger things inspired' au, and the gears are turning, and i forgot just how much i love writing for this dumbass group)
(i swear im working on the next chapter of a guide to surviving the apocalypse too)
#no but i've way too many ideas lmaoo#i forgot ive a whole longass post in my drafts dedicated to ramblings abt this longfic and i came across it today ahaha#like amy leading a manhunt for leonard bc shes got everyone to think he killed her sister (who she didn't even like much smh)#and topher's one of the ppl involved and when shawn hears he's like “topher? yeah i can handle him dw” (possible tophawn minor pairing??)#and leonard's abt to get the equivalent of being burnt at the stake literally#when guess who shows up in a fucking mercedes of all cars#fucking dave#and he helps leonard escape narrowly by driving fast af and leonard's so confused bc like “i thought you'd be with those guys”#and get this: dave doesnt believe leonard killed sammy bc of his vehement belief that leonard doesn't know magic LMAOOO#and leonard doesnt know whether to be affronted or grudgingly thankful bc if it wasn't for dave's desire for everything to be normal#leonard would have been part of the witch trials 2.0#and idk who's watched st but the plot is somewhat inspired by it#like shawn goes missing first and dave as his best friend is panicking abt it (in this one axel is shawns cousin???)#and then when they find him at last the weird deaths start leading to leonard finding sammy dead and this whole situation#and theres a whole different world underneath them and its up to leonard dave ella and sky to team up and prevent certain destruction#and theres slowburn leonave (with pining leonard and oblivious dave)#and leonard lives with his uncle whos understanding of his passions (unlike his dad who basically gave him away for the same reason)#and leonard's life is total opppsite from dave's#and they both know it#and omgggg this au has been a brainrot for so goddamn long#but idk why i just got a slew of ideas for it today#and like dave stays over at leonards at one point and leonard gives him his bed (like a gentleman)#and the next morning shawn barges in like “wheres my best friend” bc ever since he was taken he's been v paranoid abt losing the ppl he lov#and he hugs dave and daves like “how dirty are you rn” and shawns like “nothing yet i waited so that i can hug you when i see your dumb ass#and everyones like abt dave to leonard “idk if he's the right one for you”#but then later on dave saves his life by going a little bit unhinged classic dave-style#and ends up scaring a nurse and receptionist into retiring early#total drama#td leonard#td dave
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Watching 11:59 and I can’t believe they just put a literal Hallmark romcom in the middle of Star Trek Voyager down to Shannon hating Christmas/New Years this show is wild
#HEHEHE I'm NOT interested in 'the past' based episodes of Star Trek unless there's alien shit going on#and Tuvok doesn't say anything in this episode :/#a bit boring#but that old man yelling 'JASON! JASON!' reminded me of that Heavy Rain meme#Sorry VOY writers I will /NEVER/ find an old white dude who idolizes the past to be in any way likeable even when you pit him against#a corporate stooge - I just hate em both v_v#I honestly do believe that a Janeway would monologue dramatically to herself in her car - there's just something very Janeway about that and#I'll buy that it's a family trait.#HEHEH this episode is BIZZARE....I really have NO idea why the writers think we'd want to watch this romcom between not-Janeway and an#old ol d man??? HEHEHEH#I love this stupid fucking show <3<3 like EARNESTLY I do <3#WHO thought of this??#I thought for sure it'd be a fanservice thing and the love interest would be played by Chakotay b u tn o it's just SOME GRANDPA??? HHEHEHEHE#HE' S NOT EVEN HOT#T h is is literally a bizzaro hallmark movie where the big corporation wins?? HEHEH#Neelix is so cute in this episode <3 at least he's here if Tuvok's not gonna say a goddamn WORD#He has a really good memory!!! And I like how he was teasing Seven about her having kids but as soon as she looked at him he was like#' O R NO T!! ORNOT!!!' hHEHE...he and Seven arefunny together they are FRIENDS <3#OH sorry my mistake Tuvok's singular line in this episode is#'I concur with that analysis'#-I bludgeon the writers to death-#at least we got some Harry Kim lore!! I liked his story~!!#this could have a been a neat character building episode - like if it was more focused on the entire cast rather than just Janeway#but . WHATEVER. -rueful and irritated smile-#this is still just a 'blah' episode of Voy for me it takes a lot to make me rate a Voyager episode as like..HEHE ACTUALLY bad and not fun#this is 'blah' bc its not fun has no Tuvok but I like the character interactions in the non-past storyline#liveblogging
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:(
Very bad grade in therapy today
#thought i could make progress this year and yet here i am having done jack shit by now#what has even been the point#i just wanted to do something today that didnt feel awful like try to encourage people to watch a show or play a game#and now im just right back to Why do i bother staying alive? im never going to make any progress#and even if i do I'm going to just be worthless the whole time and waste precious resources others could be using#oh yes just try saying a nice thing to yourself for once! yeah sure that will help when i cant do anything worth a damn#i want to help people but i have no skillsets and no money to further my education and teaching myself gets me right where i already am!#continuing like this is like spitting in the face of anyone who is actually out there pursuing their dreams and thats not fair to them#they put in all that hard work and im over here being a whiny ass bitch bc i want so badly to do better and learn more#but the only thing holding me back is that im a dumbass who cant do anything right and no one will ever think differently#why am i trying to make myself something i can never be? what is goddamn point if its just a waste of everyones time and effort#i just... it feels like the least i can do is just stop taking up space#free up some oxygen for someone who really needs it and shelter for someone who truly deserves it#i shouldnt even have these things and yet i complain about how much gas i have to pay to commute to my jobs#like such an asshole#and i said i so much in these tags bc im such a selfish jerk who coearly doesnt care enough nor has a worthwhile vocabulary to say otherwise#theres just no fucking point to any of this#...#its cold today#might be a good day to do my favorite plan#actually yeah fuck it im gonna go#hope you all stay kind to yourselves and enjoy your 2024#you absolutely deserve it and everything you can get out of it#keep being amazing yall#see you on the flip side or whatever#orbs thought bubbles
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Watching this show is making me realize how much I adored the book series. Like I was one of those kids who knew all about Greek mythology and read the series a million times; I guess I didn't completely realize how much they impacted me and its all flooding back to me as I watch, like things I completely forgot are being retrieved from some vault in my mind and I go "I remember that!!!!"
Idk ig it's just really cool to access that part of me that I forgot about again.
#like genuinely i remember nothing from middle school#not a goddamn thing#idk i am having thoughts and feelings and am just rambling but its nice to remember a little bit of that gap#i didnt even think too much about the show when we started watching but it kinda cracked open a window to memories i thought i lost#something to think about#in other news i really tried getting my sibling into the series but it just never really happened!#like they never really cared about the books too much and left in the middle of episode two!#seeing the gap is strange but i had really hoped they would like the show#hmmmmmmmmmmmm many things to consider thank you Mr. Riordan#pjo#i really didnt think too much about it when we decided to watch but now i have Many#ollie rambles#<<<<best use of that tag thus far
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Also I want to point out that there ARE some horrible women in fiction that I genuinely don't like. Like the girl from fucking Oreshura.
#GENUINELY insufferable. I will put up with a LOT but she crosses the goddamn line lmao#(granted. the show in question is just. not a good show. so that's probably a big part of it)#or perfect insider lady. (though that one is more related to her being like. SUPER 'fake deep'. they really thought they were doing#something with that one)#I also. because I hate myself. watched citrus one time. and mei (is that her name? I don't remember) is just the fucking worst. oh and the#other girl in the love triangle whose name I don't remember because I blocked most of that show out of my brain for the sake of my sanity#'mel why tf did you watch citrus' because I have this horrible trait where if people tell me something is bad. I go 'ooh but HOW bad'#and decide I have to see for myself. I regret it EVERY time I don't know why I keep doing this#am also not really a fan of lysa but I think that might be more related to the fact that I'm legally obligated to defend sansa with my life#(also. citrus is not bad because of the subject matter. it's bad because it's bad. just to make that clear. I don't care if people write#about uncomfortable subjects. /I/ write about uncomfortable subjects. also j/c is like The™ otp I'd have no 'moral high ground' here lmao)#oh and the scientist lady from bio.hackers.#but I don't really think they knew what they were trying to do when writing her
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thinking about mafia!Simon wanting to help shy!fem!Reader with confidence in the bedroom again ):
you just don't see what he does! he's infatuated with you, and yet you look at yourself in the mirror and feel like you're still not fully grown into yourself yet. and when you and Simon have sex? god, your thoughts run too rampant with this expectation to perform, to look beautiful, to be desirable that half the time it's difficult for you to get in the mood.
Simon's fix for it? let him record him fucking you.
you didn't think he was serious until he's got you on your back with his cock buried so deep in your cunt you swear he takes the breath from your very lungs with each thrust. yet, if anything, it makes you feel more self conscious than before. are the sounds you make too annoying? is the expression on your face weird? you're not a porn star, you're just... you. nothing special.
and still, Simon talks you through it. he's holding his phone with as much precision as he can manage as he drills into you, and he grunts praises between each thrust. "just like that sweetheart... so goddamn beautiful fuck... gonna make you see what i see, yeah?"
he doesn't show you the video until the next day when he has you nestled between his legs, your back against his chest and his phone in front of both of you. the video starts playing and you really don't want to watch it but a part of you is still a little curious. so you view it with a careful eye, and you're speechless at what you see. you had never seen yourself from that angle before, eyes squeezed tight in a fucked out bliss, senses too overwhelmed to take in the sight of your boyfriend fucking you. what you had thought was an attempt to cover your chest with your arms had actually been you squeezing your tits together as if putting them on display, as proved by the recording.
then there was the view between your thighs. the way your legs spread to accommodate Simon's hips looked so obscene from his angle, but the star of the show was the way your cunt swallowed him whole. you watch your own pussy pulse as he buried himself in you. each time he pulled out you gripped onto him as if demanding that he come back. and his grunts. the sound of him groaning right into the microphone had your cunt fluttering along nothing.
"see?" he prompts, breath hot on the shell of your ear as his hand dips between your legs. a small squeak leaves you as he paws at you through the fabric of your clothes. you pray that he doesn't notice the growing heat there, but judging by the way he chuckles you know there was no chance in hell you could hide something like that from him. "yeah, you do see, don't you? got all worked up over watching me fuck you, huh? why don't we fix that?"
#mafia!ghost#mafia!simon#mafia!141#simon riley x reader#ghost x reader#simon ghost riley x reader#ghost smut#simon riley smut#simon riley x reader smut#ghost x reader smut
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nobody ever gets the mugshot of gluttony right. these days you think it has nothing to do with bodyweight. what a good trick: that gluttony could take a shape. no, there was never any fault in finishing a meal or in taking second helpings. it was always in taking from others that there was an issue - the oil baron's fingers steepled over dead bodies and stolen lands. gluttony - twin of greed, although most think greed and envy are the siblings - gluttony is pleased with the experience of gaining, is thrilled just-by-having. greed is the one that stays hungry, that has to move forever like a shark. gluttony likes it - "a glutton for punishment" is one who is seeking the harm, who loves the rush.
gluttony is a mother using her daughter's body for a diet testing ground, sharpening the bone angles. gluttony is saying why, well not! to the seventh and eighth mansion or yacht. it is not just wanting the six white horses, it is making sure that the horses came from your stables. it is not just bathing in milk - it is bathing in milk while others are starving.
oh, it's true that some sins still blaze in their bright floral prints. wrath in a white woman yelling at a person of color for even daring to be in her neighborhood. the red, incipient rage of a neck tightened at even the thought we would take the guns away. wrath has laurels, and she is good at her job, and works hard.
but sloth wasn't ever the sleepy morning of depression, the hours spent begging a clouded body to please move goddamn it; the protestant work ethic claiming even rest is somehow demonic. it was never chronic fatigue. sloth was subtle, a grey mist. she is watching you get bullied and she is deciding it is none of her business. she crosses the picket line because - what! it's just chicken, isn't it? she is closing her eyes and turning her head when the next anti-gay legislation passes. someone else will handle it. not the tense freeze of anxiety or a lack of preparation - she knows you're hurting and would rather you stay quiet about it. she tells other people i just don't see what the big deal is.
sloth is a father that doesn't do the dishes. sloth is your boyfriend's innocent shrug you're just better at household shit. sloth isn't the missed opportunity - it is the purposeful desire to just get-someone-else-to-do-it.
greed and envy are doing body shots in the back of a private jet. they are the way they always have been, but are lovers in the age of the internet. greed just finished union busting, is rolling a bitcoin over his knuckles, is about to start another MLM. envy is in a broadbrimmed hat, showing off her instagram life, grinning about how if you want it, work for it.
okay, it's true. you have a soft spot for lust, gathering dust in a corner. so tame in comparison to the others. but how funny lust is always painted as being a woman in tight clothes. you've met actually lustful women - the ones that purposefully climb into your partner's lap, the ones that say lesbians are gross but ask bisexual women into bed with their husbands. a lustful woman is not donned in lace and garters and red: that's how men think lust looks, painting their own sins into frame. this way, the sin displaces as fog and hovers above her: a woman in a dress is lust; what the man experiences is just the natural consequence.
here is the thing: lust is doing just fine, save your pity. lust is running more circles than any of them. lust is shutting down safe sexwork sites while also making teenagers in knee-high socks sex sensations. lust is CEO of an advertising network where women never pass 25 years old. all the bras lust makes are pretty to look at but, when worn, legitimately hurt. lust has a podcast, his fur coat looped around his shoulders, sells the idea that only certain people have value, that sex raises some and destroys others. lust is tilting his head and asking what did you expect when you dress like that? lust shuns you, sneers that everything you want is disgusting and taboo - right until he can figure out how to capitalize off of it. lust has the midas ability: everything he touches becomes an object.
people usually say wrath is the scary one. you agree with FMA here, though: the real dangerous one is pride, and the shit-eating grin. the white cloaks and the nationalism and the inability to apologize. it is every partner who threw a book at your head because you don't respect him. it is every mother who said my son doesn't deserve to have his life ruined over allegations. it is the teacher that fails you because you talked back.
you worry you have this one. you feel guilty when you need help but don't ask for it. prideful. ashamed when you complete something and feel good about it. too proud for your own good. but pride is not the reward of hard work or accomplishment: pride is a twitter feed. it is the thing that has to mask i didn't do anything with look at me.
pride is your father's raised hand, his raised voice. how he was never there when you needed him, but he is still "head of house." he ruins dinner and blames it on you: you're an embarrassment to this family. this is the glass you walk around, the cuts in your feet. how he says this isn't how i raised you and you have to bite back the retort: that's because you didn't actually fucking raise me.
#i personally think having any of these desires is totally fine. it's when u use them to hurt others#it's why having ambitions =/= greed: as long as ur ambition isn't ''i hope i can take someone elses good things''#writeblr#warm up#seven deadly sins
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Hmmm I’m kinda curious on how Francis would be like as a dom in bed!
Ohhhh definitely!
I feel like Francis def is too tired to dom most times, but omg, when he isn't tired for once....
This was uhm
Harder to write than I thought! It probably really isn't good so I slapped some headcanons at the end to make up for it a little
Tysm for the ask though, Anon!
WARNINGS/ CONTENT INFO; Porn with minimal plot, established relationship, GN!Reader, Dom Francis, Francis has vacation and uses it properly
NSFW UNDER THE CUT!!
If you were serious, you barely know how you ended up in this situation. You started today thinking it'd be just like any other day, your boyfriend coming home really late from work, so you'd have the apartment to yourself until he returned. Contrary to that belief, Francis had instead taken a day of vacation. He had grumbled something about it being long overdue.
From then, you had thought he'd lounge around all day. He'd probably just sleep a bit more, lay on the couch, maybe help out a little with chores - that's where you were wrong again.
Once the two of you had finished the chores around the small apartment, he grabbed you by the hips harshly. "Francis -" you yelped out, but he already pressed his lips against yours in a hungry kiss. If it was up to him, he'd have you right here, in the middle of the hallway. That's just the way Francis was, when he did have the drive to fuck you, he'd barely even think about where.
In the end, you were the one to drag him to the bedroom after he had already pulled off your top and discarded it somewhere. He trailed kisses down your neck and over your collarbone, nipping at the skin softly. "Want you s'bad..." He groaned, grinding his growing erection against your crotch. "Bet you want me too, hm? Can feel how needy you are." He adds, chuckling as he rubs small circles on your waist. You huff and pull him down towards you, kissing him feverishly.
The rest of your clothes are soon discarded - Francis rarely took his time with you. He watched the way you squirmed and whined as he slowly pushed inside you, though. He knew you just wanted to feel him. When it came to teasing, Francis had probably won a gold metal in it at some point. "So good for me, hm? It's always so tight..." he sighs lazily. His hands rest at your hips, pushing you down so you can't grind against him. You whine in protest. "Francis, please.. don't be mean.." You mumble, and he just chuckles as he presses a kiss against your cheek. "Just taking my time, love.. weren't you just complaining about me being too fast?" You scowl at him, but Francis just grins as he keeps pushing into you ever so slowly. Surely, this had to be torture for him as well? If it was, he didn't let it show one bit.
After taking his sweet time, Francis made it up to you by being way too goddamn rough. He practically abused your hole while muttering and groaning praises into your ear. You desperately held onto him, nails scratching his back. "So good, hm..? God, swear you feel heavenly..." Francis groaned into your ear, trailing kisses over your jaw. He placed hickeys and bite marks all over your neck, and you were sure with how he was treating you right now that a few on your thighs would follow soon.
As always, Francis couldn't help but finish inside you after you had reached your climax as well. He watched your slightly fucked out expression and the way his cum slowly flowed out of you, leaving kisses on your thighs, marking you up just like you thought he would. "Always so good for me, baby." He then hummed, placing a soft kiss against your lips while you snuggled against him.
I just really think Francis is a tired man and therefore rarely doms. Just takes too much of his energy.
However, I think he really really loves marking his partner. Like full-on hickeys all over your body, especially your thighs, though (he definitely is a thigh guy). Also very big on praising, though he would degrade you if you asked him to. I just think that in his mind, it's like "in love with my partner, have to tell them how much I appreciate them, especially when I'm literally taking their ability to walk!" Because I just KNOW he likes being rough. He just can't help but love the way your face contorts in pleasure at every thrust.
Francis would also 100% hold you down so he could have his way with you. He'd also slightly choke you because he holds you down by your neck when he wants to watch your reactions (this is totally not because I think that'd be hot. Nah uh.)
Also, I don't really think he is actually that kinky (or he just doesn't know that what he likes is considered a kink because that man has never spoken to anyone about it). I think he always makes sure you cum first, either makes you cum all over again before properly fucking you or denying you an orgasm as he tests how long he can hold one back himself.
Also, with a fem partner, he is so into eating them out. Genuinely obsessed with it.
With a masc partner, I think he'd be the type to touch them while just watching their expressions
he is so big on watching his partner. He just wants to make sure he's making you feel good still, even though he definitely has your favourite spots memorised by heart.
Anyway! Really short omg I'm sorry. I'm currently obsessing over School Bus Graveyard, so uhm! Not many Francis thoughts in my brain. I hope this isn't as bad as it looks to me (it's definitely worse, but I will not be bothered (I will panic about it))
#francis mosses#francis mosses x you#thats not my neighbor#x reader#milkman that's not my neighbor#milkman x reader#francis mosses x reader#francis mosses headcanons
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one amazing thing about the Owl House finale is that it finally contextualized for me one of the central metaphors of the show. Spoilers for the series finale Watching and Dreaming ahead.
we good? no one spoiling themselves? beauty
for a long time now, I thought we had a pretty standard coming-of-age metaphor dichotomized by the show's central antagonists. you've got your protestant witch hunter Belos who introduces a maturity and ugliness to Luz's narrative; he clearly represents a particular, restricting form of adulthood, and just when Belos becomes his most threatening, boom, enter the Collector, Luz's dangerously naïve inner child to ruin all her development on the Boiling Isles. Seems simple enough
what I didn't anticipate was just how specific and personal their roles in the story actually are to Luz once you have the full context from the series finale
look again
this story - this whole series - is about the grief that a neurodivergent kid experienced at a young age, introducing the cruelty of loss and adulthood before she was ready to handle it. and, how to reclaim a more whole understanding of herself as she rebuilds her life with people who get her
Belos is designed to infect the titan carcass like a disease. a cancer. it's super goddamn significant that the titan is King's dad (King, who became Luz's younger brother). they set up Belos not just to be another fascist kids' cartoon villain (although yeah, he do be doing some of that), but to specifically become a force that oppressed the weirdness from the one place that understood Luz. the Iles. the dad. And by the end of the story, Belos's goopy body-horror isn't just for show, he's just like the cancer or other terminal disease that took Luz's dad from her
he's the thing Luz hasn't processed in season 1 that comes in at the end like a warning. he's the threat that forces Luz to grapple with her own humanity, feeling somehow (often completely unjustifiably) harmful to those around her, through the grief she doesn't want to be a burden or the weirdness (neurodivergence) others don't understand. he's the force that says there is something wrong with you, Luz, give in to your grief, this is what you can't face. this is the lie you've been telling to those closest to you: that you're okay
then you have the Collector. (notable that he's a collector, and we see Luz's mom and dad had quite the collection of nerdy memorabilia)
the Collector is the child too young to understand death. Too young to understand consequences, or why their playmates don't feel like playing anymore with someone so weird and maybe a bit too involved in their own world. The Collector is Luz's inner child, that kid we see right before the "worst week ever" — the one who didn't and couldn't understand what was about to happen even as it was going down. unapologetically weird, a bit destructive and short-sighted, but wholly colourful, wholly themselves. that's why the Collector wants to live out Luz's adventures, but without all the depth. just the fun escapist fantasy
but don't think I forgot the internal conflict! :D
because Camila's role also gets an added depth too: Camila was framed at the outset of the series as someone who loved Luz, but wanted her to fit inside a box that she just didn't. later, Luz completely misconstrued her mom's breakdown when she learned that Luz chose to run away. as many people have pointed out by now, Luz misremembers the actual dialogue that Camila says: Camila only wanted her daughter safe, not to lose her. Luz meanwhile felt like she had to choose to destroy this part of herself, or give up her connection with her mom altogether
but we know now Camila actually deeply relates to Luz. she may not understand Luz's fascination with horrific things like on the boiling isles (very akin to a kid getting more grim hobbies in the wake of a death, like Luz's taxidermy), but she loves Luz for who she is. all of her. she never wanted Luz to change
Luz was the one framing the central conflict of the show as go back to her mom or stay in the boiling isles. Luz was the one who felt like she had to punish herself by rejecting the one place where she felt like herself. once Camila realizes what's been going on, and how deeply connected it is to the loss of Luz's dad, she knows Luz is trying to make a "very bad choice for herself." And she won't let that happen (what a great mom!!)
But Luz does have one real choice ahead of her
because of the inner child who once again has to confront death (this time, Luz's own), Luz is able to connect with a father figure, the titan, the one place she feels understood. in the form of a power-up that makes her into a fantasy witch straight out of the Good Witch Azura, the one place she got joy after that huge loss, the titan gives her the strength to face the cancer—a force draining everything good in her life from her and making her question she deserves it in the first place—but only if she can choose herself
and that means choosing happiness, choosing found family, choosing love and friendship and self-discovery in the place she feels most at home! every bond she's forged, everything she's worked for, it all comes down to choosing to face grief and move on in life with weirdos who stick together.
hoot hoot, that's some good metaphor
#the owl house#toh spoilers#luz noceda#eda clawthorne#king clawthorne#the collector#emperor belos#camila noceda#i may update the post with images at some point but I figured that's more likely to unintentionally spoil others#watching and dreaming
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