#I am assuming I am touch averse bc I'm autistic and it does overload my brain with Bad Sensations but I have also read abt ace ppl who are
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When ur writing something and learn something new about yourself in the process and ur like:
OH!!! That makes sense.
#Why did nobody ever tell me this shit#I fucking hate being touched by other people#Genuinely. They're always too warm and leave like this awful awful feeling lingering on my skin.#Even people I love#Which fucking sucks bc I thought I was just a bitter awful person even when I appreciated the sentiment#No turns out nobody wanted to fucking tell me touch aversion is an actual thing#It's fine if I initiate but God help you if you touch me without warning or ask for hugs without letting me prep#I always felt so cruel denying hugs like what kind of person does that to ppl they love#Fuck man#I was literally writing today and had one character go 'I appreciate the sentiment but [plucks hands off his face] never touch me again or-#I will throw up on you. Thank you'#And then o was like 'Hm this doesn't seem. Regular.' so I just spent like 10 minutes googling increasingly vague searches to find out why-#I might feel this way#And hey it turns out!! It is an actual thing! It has a name!! I can find others like me!!!!#I am assuming I am touch averse bc I'm autistic and it does overload my brain with Bad Sensations but I have also read abt ace ppl who are#Touch averse!! And I'm both autistic and ace so like. My brethren#I don't feel the need to look too deep into like the Why but I thought that was an interesting thing#I'm both of those things! and the third thing connecting the two!#Anyway. I feel so vindicated rn.#Slightly bitter I never knew there was an actual term b4 now. But vindicated nonetheless.#Touch averse. Hell yeah.#Cruddy rambles
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