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#HI to anyone who saw this post before i reedited it: no you didn't
fragrantpines · 26 days
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One part ginger, one part ginseng root, two part wolfberries
Those were the ingredients Tusu Elixir used to cure the headache of the villagers.
It was a simple remedy that any old doctor would have been able to make up, yet being able to see the light in their eyes slowly return back was a type of happiness that he quietly indulged in. Although his usual comments about people not taking care of their health were as snide as ever, observant patients would always notice how he seemed very pleased whenever he was able to cure a patient, regardless of what ailment they had been inflicted with.
One part spring water, two parts daisies, three parts freshly bloomed plum blossoms
It was supposed to be an easy to make medicine. However, the cold winter breeze that knocked against his window taunted him, whispering about how this little girl was going to die in front of his eyes if he didn't do anything.
"Please doctor, you have to save her!"
The begging eyes of the single mother tore his heart apart.
That night, the mother and daughter duo reunite happily, thanking the doctor profusely for bringing the little girl back the life. The doctor listened to everything they had to say before shooing them away, telling them to get out of his sight which they happily did.
The moment they left, the doctor locked the doors before looking down at his feet, a heavy sigh exhaled from his lips as he watches his feet fade in and out of existence.
Ah well, all well ends well.
Two parts parsley, two parts mushrooms, mix it all together in a bowl with freshly brewed wine
That was the "medicine" he forced himself to drink to regenerate his energy every so often.
Rumours of a doctor that could revive the dead spread like wildfire while the wine that brought him to existence was slowly becoming a forgotten tradition of the past.
By the time he was found by you, it was obvious that he was already on the brink of death. His pale skin looked ghostly underneath the candlelight, while his frail body was supported by a wheelchair that was covered with various medicinal herbs and flowers, blooming healthily in contrast to the sickly food soul who summoned them.
Although his words were akin to poisonous needles, that didn't stop you from noticing the blanket that covered his legs; and in a moment of impulse, you grabbed it and lifted it up.
"......."
At that moment, a heavy silence befell onto the both of you.
"Who did this to you?"
Your hands shook as you reached out to touch his legs-- at least, where his legs should have been. However, there was nothing to imply its existence except for its shadow that faded in and out of existence, following the movements of his upper body that froze the moment you lifted the blanket off his legs.
Instantly, the man slapped your hand away, glaring down at you.
"It's none of your business."
Who he wanted to save was his problem, and the price he had to pay was his burden to shoulder. So, don't bother him nor try to stop him.
It was for your own good.
One part wisteria, two parts tea leaves, then mix them all in a special bowl that contains....
Your eyes narrowed so hard that they became the size of twigs. No matter how hard you squinted, you weren't able to tell what the last part of the recipe was.
"Don't squint so hard or else you'll be walking around with a pair of windows in front of your eyes. You're not smart enough to pull off that look."
Tusu Elixir not-so-gently dropped a book on top of your head, making you wince before you turned around and pouted. "It's not my fault that Shifu has such bad handwriting. If I wasn't your disciple, I doubt anyone else would be able to read past the first sentence!"
The man furrowed his brows. He rests his elbow on his wheelchair's arm before resting his chin on top of his palm, staring at your face with an irritated look. "Is that so? Well, if you had just paid attention to my lessons while I was teaching you, you wouldn't need to refer to these books at all. So instead of blaming me for your incompetence, how about you stop staying up so late at night and go to bed early so that your lazy brain can absorb more knowledge in the morning."
Before you could protest, he turned his wheelchair around and wheeled his way to the opposite side of the room, ignoring your pleas and cries for help.
After coming to Kongsang, his days had been relatively peaceful. Its power helped stabilise his condition while its fertile soil helped him grow various medical herbs that were hard to obtain in Qingqiu. Since he was also an established doctor, he was able to open a clinic without any problem and had been seeing patients in and out every day just like he used to. The only difference from the past compared to the present was--
"Shifu!!"
The sudden yell snapped him out of memory lane, causing him to whip his head around instantly in the direction of your voice. In his haste, he didn't hear how close your voice was, leading to your faces being so close that your noses would brush against each other if any of you made the slightest of movements.
Ba dump
It was only for a brief second, yet it felt like an eternity to Tusu.
For once, the doctor was rendered speechless, incapable of retorting back any snarky words or comebacks. Instead he sat there as still as a statue, wishing to prolong this moment for as long as he could.
Unfortunately, that wish was shattered the instant you pulled away, putting as much distance between the two of you as you could while apologising in a frantic voice.
"I-I'm sorry, shifu! I just wanted to ask you about this other recipe, but then you just looked so entranced in your writing that I didn't know how else to pull your attention away so--"
You rambled on and on, droning off about some excuses that Tusu could easily refute against-- except he didn't because he was too busy trying to slow down his heart that wouldn't listen to his commands to stop beating so loudly.
Sometimes, he wondered why he agreed to take you as his disciple. Was it out of pity? An act of kindness? A way to keep you by his side longer even though he was so eager to push you away in the past?
Even now, he wasn't sure of the answer. However, whenever the time came for you to leave his clinic (to leave him), there was always one thought that never failed to cross his mind.
When were you coming back?
Two parts fresh snow, three parts ice, all encased inside a bottle that held the air of the coldest winter.
His heart stopped the moment he heard the news.
"Let me see them."
Yangzhou hesitated before shaking his head. "You mustn't, Doctor Tusu. You've used too much of your soul energy trying to heal us. The young master is already being taken care of by Doctor Dumpling, so as soon as you are fit, you'll be able to go see them again."
Tusu gritted his teeth. "It seems that you didn't hear me. I said, Let. Me. See. Them."
Yangzhou bit his lips, taking a glance at the opened window inside of the room before slowly shaking his head again. "The young master was the one who told me to keep you in place if something were to ever happen to them, so--"
"Hah! So that fool already knew what they were doing, what a joke!"
Tusu laughed bitterly, slamming his hand so hard against his wheelchair that veins popped up underneath his skin.
How laughable was it for him to react this way? He would always talk about how taking you under his wing was more trouble than it was worth but as the days went by, your presence in his life became irreplaceable, something that he wished to keep longer by his side without knowing why he longedfor it so desperately.
Now, as his mind turned into a blank, his thoughts shifted to the scene of the battlefield; all the food souls bravely fighting on the front lines while he was in charge of keeping them alive at the back. Out of nowhere, a corrupted food soul came from behind and threw a corrupted blade at him aimed at his heart. By the time he noticed, it was already too late, you were standing in front of him with the blade through your arm.
It was fine, it was fine, it was fine–except it wasn't because the corruption turned out to be extremely poisonous to mortals. Although you were part god, you were still human which meant that you were still vulnerable to this poison. The sole cure to the poison was effective only on food souls so your chances of survival were slim, so slim that all the stars could fall from the sky before you had a chance of survival.
There wasn't enough time, he had to see you now but the resolve in Yangzhou’s gaze told him that he was determined to see through your orders to the bitter end.
Earlier, if he had seen the enemy beforehand, none of this would have happened. If he hadn't exerted himself on spot, he would be well enough to look after you right now. If he had healthy legs, he would be strong enough to push the man away and rush to your side.
Past regrets were the present self's worst enemy. That couldn't be more true as he watched Yangzhou leave the room before standing right outside as a guard.
If only he had the ability to pull down all the stars for you.
Three months of autumn, two weeks of quarantine and one day of visit.
.... Alas, the stars had yet to fall on the night of your passing.
Two parts sunshine collected during the brightest hour of the day, two parts starlight taken from a newly born star, mixed together with water drawn from the Huang Chuan river.
No, it still wasn't good enough.
Perhaps substituting the water with flames from a newly reincarnated phoenix would work better? But there was a chance that the concoction would explode on use, damaging your well-preserved body lying on the bed as silent as stone. 
Maybe using bamboo water collected during the moment of sunrise would help balance it out, but that meant that it wouldn't be strong enough to call back your soul from the underworld.
Were you still in the underworld, waiting in line to drink Meng Po's soup or had you already been reincarnated during the year he used to preserve your body in such a perfect condition?
Something that felt like a sneer escaped past his lips but he was too exhausted to acknowledge it. Instead, he rolled his wheelchair up to the side of the bed and gazed at your face, murmuring under his breath.
"Wake up. You've been sleeping for so long that the god of food had to come back to take over Kongsang."
"He wasn't pleased when he learnt of what happened to you. In fact, he was furious and nearly went to war to avenge your death, but that's to be expected. No parent would ever want their child to die before them, especially in such a cruel way."
"You're a fool to think that sleeping for so long means that you're free from practice. There is so much you still have to learn so don't think of slacking off now. If you wake up now then I might be generous enough to let you off tomorrow."
"Okay, I'll allow you to sleep in for another hour every morning. That should be enough time for you to pull your ditzy head out of the clouds."
"Don't get greedy. I won’t negotiate past an hour. Now open up your eyes or forget about calling yourself my disciple ever again."
"......."
"That was a lie. You're the first and only disciple I'll ever take under my wing. All those times I told you to stay back were excuses for me to keep you by my side longer. You were improving at such a rapid pace that I was scared that you would leave me soon so I purposefully went harsher on you to keep you from improving any quicker."
"I'll admit it. I love you. I loved you the moment you reached your hand out to me. I love so deeply that there’s no curing me, just like how there is no cure that could bring you back to my side again."
"So, wait for me, okay? I'll be joining you soon. Don't you dare to cross over before I find you again, stupid disciple."
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