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jaylver · 2 months

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ROCKLAND — P.SH

synopsis: almost like a nightmare, park sunghoon plagues your present just as much as your past regrets had done. however, this time around, you and him decided to right your wrongs one last time.

pairings: non-idol!sunghoon x afab!reader

genre: exes to lovers, miscommunications, angst, second chance romance

warning(s): profanities, brief mentions of smoking, drinking, partying and alcohol

wc: 8k

a/n: i'm BACK. this has been in the works for far too long because of the constant writer's block so i'm not sure if it's good or not, plus it's my first exes to lovers so please be nice <3 greatly inspired by gracie abram's "rockland", so do give it a listen too! please leave a feedback and reblogs are greatly appreciated! muah xx

If there was one thing you’d regret forever in this lifetime, it would be ending things with the love of your life.

You admit it, you’re selfish. Selfish for wanting to leave the town you grew to hate, selfish for prioritising yourself and chasing your dreams, choosing to leave the people you loved instead. Painted a villain in the eyes of many close to the person you once went home to and even the man himself. But, how could he fully blame you when he was equally selfish too?

Park Sunghoon thought keeping you in the cage of this small town was going to make him a happy man. He often fantasised about the possibility of you and his future together, completely pushing aside the thought of you leaving, until it actually happened.

He was angry. He let himself be consumed by his own feelings and mindlessly projecting his anger and blame on you, while you regretfully did the same.

Pools of tears and venomous words spewed out of impulse left you scarred and broken down. It was a bad ending that you’d see in movies coming to life. The moment you had everything packed and goodbyes said, you figured leaving was for the best, now that your ex hates you and his friends who probably felt the same.

It was a shame, though. Heading to somewhere far from home with a heavy heart knowing you didn’t have the chance to see him once more. Frankly, you were a coward, and so was he.

That explained why returning back home was the scariest thing you had to face in a while.

It was ironic, wasn't it? Coming back to the place you wished for years to escape and actually doing so, but eventually having to return after you dropped out of the college that you've been praying and praying to get into, only for it to be overwhelming and the city lights couldn't compare to the starry night of your hometown.

You suppose you got the thing you wanted, but it just wasn't what you imagined.

Freshly twenty-two and out of school, you figured home was what you needed in your next step before deciding if you should re enrol. However, you find yourself not having the guts to face your family and friends, not after the promises turned out to be empty.

"You should quit smoking,"

Yunjin, your cousin and practically your closest friend growing up, was just a distance away when you spotted her, leaning against her car with a cigarette in hand. You found it amusing how she didn't cave into vapes instead in this day and age.

"Y/N!" She pushed the bud of her half smoked cigarette into the wall, then started jogging towards you, her dress flowing in the wind and boots making obnoxious clicks against the ground. There was a sense of relief in her eyes, her usual smile that you missed graced your presence. "God, I missed you, things aren't the same without you here,"

In the span of a few seconds of her hug, you took the chance to digest her words. Did that mean the traditions you've upheld are now gone? Parties, trips to the beach, all those?

"What?"

Yunjin pulled away, still managing a small smile. "I don't think things were ever the same since you left … and after you broke up with Sunghoon,"

You blinked, looking away into the distance. "I don't think I'll be welcomed,"

Yunjin scoffed, slapping your arm and scurrying to get your bags. "Don't say that! So not true. Everyone in the family is waiting for you to be back—"

"And talk behind my back about my failure in graduating? Yeah, no,"

‘‘That’s not going to happen,” Yunjin sighed, struggling with your bags and declining your help, but you still forcefully grabbed some knowing she’d eventually crumble. “I think they’ll get it,”

Would they?

Once you are settled into the car, bags successfully loaded into the trunk, you let yourself melt into the comforts of Yunjin’s passenger seat, finally getting to close your eyes and drift away. You thought it was best before having to face everything and everyone once again.

“What’s your plan now, anyway?”

Without opening your eyes, you envisioned a distant image in your head. “Take my time off and see if I’d like to re enrol or not. If I don’t, I’ll just go plan B,”

“Which is?”

“Accept the job offer in London,”

Yunjin almost hit the brakes out of shock, the news that came from you felt like it had hit her in the face, but somehow, she managed to keep her cool and not get you both killed. “What?” she shrieked.

“What?” you questioned back, sounding nonchalant as if this was just another normal offer that didn’t seem particularly significant. But it was.

“You have a job offer in London and you’re coming back here,”

“I left the city for a reason, it’d be stupid to go to another one right after,”

Yunjin exhaled, blinking in stupor. “Right,”

“How’s … everyone?”

Yunjin knew you weren’t referring to your family. Of course you’d know how your own family was doing, that’s a no brainer. What you were trying to mean was your old friend group. You couldn’t blame them for being mad at you, after all you were only a part of it because of Sunghoon.

“Heeseung’s graduating soon,” this was the first update you’ve gotten from Yunjin after those years away. It took you every will not to ask her about them, but here you were now, finally giving in. “They’re still the same, nothing’s changed,”

“What about him?”

Yunjin seemed hesitant, obviously holding back something that she didn’t want you to know. “I’m not going to explode upon hearing, you know that, right?” you joked lightheartedly, but secretly dreading hearing about him.

“I think he’s seeing someone,”

“Good for him,”

Would it be a crime to admit that you still missed your ex? Something in you was wishing you could rekindle a connection again now that you’re back, but all that hope shattered. If he had already moved on, why couldn’t you? Even after knowing how he probably hated and resented you for doing what you did, you still couldn’t bring yourself to hate him back.

“That’s all?”

“You want me to go full crazy ex mode? You’re insane,” you shook your head, smiling a little, hoping Yunjin didn’t notice the speck of sadness swimming in your irises. “Whoever she is, I’m sure that I would like her … if I were slightly nicer,”

She let out a ‘tch’ in response, though grinning. “What are you going to do with them around? There’s no way you’d be able to fully avoid them,”

“What can I do? I’ll just have to coexist.”

Coexist was a funny word. How were you able to do that when you couldn’t even fully get over Sunghoon in the first place? Thinking about meeting him in flesh already made you feel like doubling over and projectile vomit. That was how pathetic you were, what a shame.

Settling in was easy. It was natural to be back home, way better than being in the noisy city and constantly surrounded by a bunch of fake friends. The question of why you left in the first place started burning your mind as you tossed around trying to sleep, but it only persisted to bug you. Then came the thoughts of Sunghoon and the friends you left behind, which prompted you to be fully awake, sitting up in bed.

It wasn't the greatest idea to reach for your phone and search for his contact name, just to recall the day you deleted his number. Yet, your memory never failed you, remembering the digits like it was first instinct, fingers already typing his number. Your thumb hovered over the green call button, a haze in your mind.

Inevitably, you shut your phone and dug your head into your pillow. He would've laughed then, if he had seen this happen, the exact moment of you almost caving in and finally saying the sorry you never gave him.

The pictures you saw of him on social media here and there made you wonder how he was and if he had already forgotten about you. There were a few recurring appearances of a girl that seemed to linger by his side in group pictures that caught your eyes. Who took your bed when you left? Who laughed at everything that he said? Was it that girl?

Just like the time you first had a crush on Sunghoon, you stayed awake thinking about him, except this time around, you were filled with regret instead of hope.

"Heeseung asked me about you,"

Yunjin's random confession in the middle of the day had surprised you. Lee Heeseung, the best friend of your ex who you swore hated your guts, asked about you? Shocker.

"What did you say?"

"I said something along the lines of you figuring out life and just chilling here until the time comes," Yunjin shrugged, and you nodded slowly. "But there's something he said that made me a bit … confused?"

"What?"

"He said they wanted to see you again,"

You raised your eyebrows, a hint of scepticism flashed over your eyes. "They want to see me? Tell me a better joke next time, thanks,"

"I'm not joking! I mean, he did say excluding Sunghoon, but the other guys wanted to know how you were now that you're back," Yunjin winced a little at the mention of your ex, but you waved it off.

"Are they treating me to dinner or something?"

"Well … no. But Heeseung asked me to bring you to their next party, which is in a few days," Yunjin's gaze softened, hand patting your back. "You know you don't have to come if you don't want to. I mean, after all that happened with you and them and Sunghoon,"

You let out a small sigh, absentmindedly fidgeting your fingers. "It's all in the past now. I'm sure Sunghoon has moved on with another girl, and maybe—just maybe—the guys do hate me less."

You never went to that party Yunjin mentioned.

It was hard to admit but you knew, deep inside you, you were afraid, too cowardly to face the people you once knew. Instead, you chose to linger around like a lost soul in a town full of the ghosts of your past.

It didn't help that the party was also in Sunghoon's house. How did they expect you to go in the first place? You thought you'd never step foot in there after you broke it off with him, and you were adamant on keeping it that way, but your heart got the worst of you.

On the night of the party, you drove around the neighbourhood, eventually stopping across the street of his house. You didn't know what got to you to do so, but you guessed reminiscence and bright lights coming from the house were the reason. The music was loud, people were coming in and out of the house, and the only thing you could think of was him.

That thought alone was enough to have you drive away, leaving the house further and further away into the background just as the memories of him being pushed into the back of your mind.

Rotting in your bed wasn't how your early 20s were meant to be spent, and avoiding almost everyone most definitely wasn't the case either.

Your family and Yunjin were the only people you saw daily, as for the friends you once had, they were long forgotten or didn't even bother to reach out. Except for Heeseung and the others.

That, to you, was a really funny thing to think about. People who stuck by you after the break up and swore to be your closest friends didn't try contacting you once you moved back, knowing damn well word traveled fast in the town; whereas the friends you thought hated you were the first to reach out.

"I'll go to that party," you said to Yunjin on a sunny afternoon tanning session by the pool, sunglasses sitting on the bridge of your nose, hiding the apprehension in your eyes.

"Really?" Yunjin almost jumped out of her seat. It was a party she had brought up days ago, still persistent on taking you out. At least this time around, it wasn't in Sunghoon's house, but her friend Chaewon's. "That's great! Chaewon and the girls are super nice, you'll love them. Let's pick a nice outfit for you, okay?"

Yunjin was by far the most enthusiastic one between you and her. She was picking out dresses and tops, literally rummaging through your closet for anything, and you had to remind her it was just a college party. So, you settled for a skirt and a plain top.

"Will you be okay? I'll stick by you," Yunjin had her arms around you, standing by the front door of Chaewon's house, hearing the music blaring from the inside.

"I'm fine—I think I'll be fine—I just don't want to run away from everyone anymore," it was mostly true, you thought it was inevitable to hide all the time, that wasn't how you're going to spend your life living.

"If there's anything, tell me, okay? We'll leave if you're getting sick," Yunjin gave your arm a final squeeze of assurance before crossing the threshold.

It was the same as every party you've gone to. Loud music, drunk college kids, liquor and beers strayed around, it reeked of your nightmare in a nutshell there.

Yunjin's friends were all as lovely as she had promised. The host herself was wobbling on her feet but managed to grace you with her humour. There was Sakura and Kazuha that you learned were foreign students.

Throughout the night, you were stuck by Yunjin, going from circle to circle and introducing yourself or recognising some of your past school mates. But, almost inevitably so, Heeseung, Jay and Jake had made an appearance too.

"Y/N," Jay was the first to call your name, causing you to turn your head at the familiar voice.

Your thoughts during then were jumbled into a mess. The people you were fighting to avoid were standing in front of you, all of which were much different than the memories you had of them in mind.

Three of them had grown taller, gained some muscles and matured in many ways. Jay's hair was dyed pink, Heeseung got new piercings and Jake had a tattoo on his finger. It was strange to admit they're the same people you knew despite feeling the complete opposite of familiarity.

"Hey—" you were cut off by Jay closing in and pulling you into a hug, this for once was something you remembered about him.

"We're so glad you're back," he whispered into your hair, squeezing you tight. It reminded you then that you were friends with him and the guys before you even dated Sunghoon, that connection was deeper than it seemed, and for it to be severed just because of a breakup was gut wrenching to realise. "We're sorry, Y/N, we're so sorry,"

His apology was genuine, that's for sure. Once you pull away, you let both Heeseung and Jake take turns to hug you, whispering apologies into your ear. It was odd, to accept their apologies and having to start afresh. You held onto them, just taking it in. To forgive was a big step, but maybe it was your first step.

You sat there, catching up with them and slowly getting comfortable just like the old days. Heeseung graduated and got a good job offer, Jay and Jake were still studying, both of which were in the same university. You were relieved there was nothing too awkward between you and them, or else you would have regretted your choices.

The night continued on with a few small talks and eventually you had to excuse yourself to the toilet. You wondered how Chaewon's house was so big, with halls that seemed to never end, or it could just be the effects of alcohol.

Stumbling around, you held onto the walls, passing by rooms occupied by people probably doing something unspeakable. You thought your peace of mind would be intact until the end of the night, but you were wrong. Upon turning a corner, you froze.

It was Sunghoon. It was him.

Grief was a funny feeling, especially when it comes to someone you once knew. You stared at him and there he was, like a ghost from your past coming back to haunt you. He was the shell of the person you loved, and you couldn't help but grieve the person he once was. What was he like now?

Before you could even turn around and make a run for it, his wandering eyes landed on you. He had the same thought process as you. Realisation, panic, sadness, confusion all mixed into a heap of feelings.

Your feet started moving on its own, as you stepped back, he took a step forward. Your breath became ragged, heart thumping hard and blood pumping in your ears. He was nearing, and you were running away, it was the same as before.

"Y/N!" He called out, and all it took was him to say your name again to have you stop in your tracks. Gosh, you were pathetic.

He was standing before you now, closer than he was a moment ago. It was then you realised how much he had changed too.

He was taller, smile lines etched much deeper into his face, almost changing along the same wavelengths with the others. There was something different about the way he looked at you, however. From love in his eyes that eventually changed into hatred was now filled with longing and confusion.

"Y/N," he repeated, disbelief evident in his voice, as if he couldn't believe you were there.

"Sunghoon," you blinked, a frown unknowingly making its way to your face. You let a few beats of silence pass, conflicted and nervous. "I—I should leave,"

"No—!" his hand reached out for you, but you didn't feel his touch. He didn't dare to touch you, letting his hand linger before pulling it back to his side. "I mean, you don't have to leave,"

"I thought you hate me,"

Sunghoon's gaze fell to the floor, jaw clenched and eyebrows furrowed. He met your eyes once more. "I should hate you, shouldn't I? But I don't think I do, I never did,"

You blinked, a little surprised, a little hurt. All along he had made you think he hated your guts but he actually didn't? "Oh," you seemed to have lost the ability to talk or to compute a proper sentence.

You thought of the things you wanted to ask him. If he was still angry at you or if things were working for him. But, what came out was the question you've stored in the back of your mind instead.

"Are you with someone new?"

You figured he didn't expect such a question from you, much as you didn't expect yourself saying it. It was an itching thought, one that made you look like a typical ex, but you couldn't help it.

"I'm not," he sounded almost exasperated, as if having to squash down this rumour for the thousandth time.

"Oh … oh," you didn't know what to say, averting your gaze away from him and finding comfort in the wall behind him.

Sunghoon paused, gaze following yours, looking reluctant whether or not to continue the conversation, but alas, he did. "How have you been?"

"Bad," you laughed a little, and Sunghoon's ears perked at the sound of it that he hasn't heard for ages. "You?"

"I quit skating,"

That was surprising. How could he have? Skating was his dream, his past, present and supposed future, but now, it came crashing down. You didn't know if you should feel sorry for him, as you have been a part of his journey, but one bit of you also seemed to have started mourning the changed Sunghoon that stood before you.

"Why?"

He shrugged, hands slipping into his pocket with a solemn look. "I lost interest. I'm into music now, I'm in a band with the guys,"

You heaved a breath, a deep one. Ironic it was that he was doing music now when he was the one criticising you in the past for wanting to pursue it. Who even was this person? With a new appearance came a new personality, he was much further away than you thought despite the physical distance.

"You've changed," you didn't know what prompted you to say that, maybe it was the disbelief or the denial that he was someone new, but whatever it was, neither of you could deny the fact that he did change. "I'm scared of the person you've become,"

A beat passed, an unreadable expression on Sunghoon's face that you couldn't distinguish even though by now you thought you'd know every one of them.

"And I'm scared you're still the same."

Seeing Sunghoon that night seemed to have altered something in your life. Somehow, he was everywhere you went.

Who was working at the register? Sunghoon. Who was at the park? Sunghoon. Who was at the party Yunjin managed to drag you to? Sunghoon.

It was haunting.

All those little encounters didn't mean you talked to him like normal, though. The awkward tension in the air still remained, seeing each other only reminded you and him both of your pasts, and you hated it. That explained why you were having a hard time seeing him at another party you were at.

Yunjin was much more of a party goer than you expected, and she successfully convinced you to go to all of them. It was fun until you got drunk and started being emotional. Your efforts of hiding from Sunghoon that night failed when he barged into the empty room you were sobbing in, whether it was accidental or not, you didn't know, you wished to not know.

"Y/N?"

His voice brought back the times he called your name. Both the good and bad ones. You stared up at him from the ground, tears welling your eyes. The person you were looking at was someone you thought was a soulmate, but now stood as someone closer to a stranger than a friend.

"W–what are you doing here? Why are you crying?"

The alcohol messing with your brain was processing his words, but what came out from your lips was the total opposite of an answer. "I'm sorry, Hoonie,"

Sunghoon's eyes widened at the nickname, the privilege that only you had. He kneeled down, taking a seat on the ground opposite you, a visible distance in between.

"I hate this—us—I feel like if we gave it one night, to talk, to just feel—you'd hate me less and make it alright," you choked back the sobs building up in your throat, the dizziness making you unaware of how Sunghoon reached out only to hesitate and pressed his hand back to his side. "Just wish that we could fight now, I'd hold you on the comedown …" your voice faltered, head leaning onto the wall.

"Y/N, you're drunk, we can talk this out another day," Sunghoon striped off his jacket and covered your exposed thighs with it. "Just … don't avoid me. I–I don't hate you, I just hope we can have a decent conversation without thinking about the past,"

He admitted it, how the two of you had secretly been thinking about the past, letting it be a big wall in between instead of growing from it. Yet, you could tell the unspoken anger and sadness still lingered, choosing to pour out gradually and unknowingly.

"Bet you wish you never even met me," you started slurring, hand gripping onto his jacket tightly. "I can't blame you, I broke your every heartbeat," your eyes were shut, images playing in your mind, not knowing the saddened look dawning on Sunghoon's face.

"Let's get you back."

In your sleep that night, you saw him. He was there, so far yet so close, and just like reality, he was hard to reach, harder to understand compared to before. He was a knife cutting deep, leaving a mark that constantly reminded you of the past.

How could you even make everything go back to the way it was?

Sunghoon was on your front door step the night everyone was out for dinner except you.

You hadn't expected him to turn up, thinking it'd be you that stood at his doorstep instead as you still had his jacket from that party (which you do not want to think about again).

"Sunghoon. Hey," the door was opened and you leaned against it, trying your best at hiding the hint of pining in your gaze.

"Oh, hey," he greeted back rather stiffly, dressed in a simple attire with the classic white Lacoste sneakers that he always wore. "I–I wanted to—"

"Take your … jacket?" You cut him off half way, nerves wrecking your brain.

A beat passed, Sunghoom visibly gulped. "Y–Yeah, my jacket,"

"I'll go grab it for you," you jerked your thumb over your shoulder, awkwardly scurrying back in to retrieve his jacket and coming back to see him chewing on his bottom lip, seemingly nervous. "Here. Thanks for it,"

"No problem," Sunghoon coughed, grabbing the jacket but absolutely paying no mind to it. His stare was straight at you.

"That's all, right?"

"Yeah,"

"Yeah," you echoed, hating the sudden rigidness between the two of you. "Bye then, Sunghoon,"

"Bye," Sunghoon said, looking dazed. Weird.

You saw him backing away and decided to close the door, but before you could even do so, a force had stopped you from closing it. Not a force, much rather a hand, his hand. The door was pushed open, and you physically jumped at the suddenness of it. Your eyes met Sunghoon's sorrowful ones.

"Don't push me away, Y/N, not again,"

"Sunghoon,"

He made his way in, closing the door behind him and you let him. Was this seriously happening?

"You said you wanted to give us one night to talk, so I'm here now. I didn't care about the jacket, I cared about you. I hate seeing us like this, it's like we're strangers," Sunghoon let out a frustrated huff, eyebrows furrowed.

"We can't just pretend nothing has happened between us,"

"So you want me to hate you instead? You're saying as if it's easy, Y/N, feelings don't work that way!"

"Then how do we go back to how it was? We can't, that's the truth. You're not the same person I used to know,"

"Cut the bullshit. I'm the same as I was, maybe just a little different than I was years ago, but that doesn't change anything. When does that ever stop you from loving?"

Were you too scared to love?

Sunghoon ran his hand across his face, wetting his lips. "You’re scared of change, and I don’t think that’s something new about you,”

Ouch.

“But I really wish you could let it all go. I don’t hate you, nor do I harbour any anger regarding the things that happened years ago. It hurts, it did, but seeing you now made me feel the opposite of all those emotions,” Sunghoon took a deep breath in, and you were holding yours. “I think about you a lot, actually. I regretted a lot of the things I said and done, and I wanted to say I’m sorry. I’m sorry for not being there for you and giving you the support you needed. I should've fought for us and not leave, I–I—" Sunghoon choked, unable to hold in his overpowering emotions anymore.

You didn’t say anything, instinctively closing in and pulling him into your arms, letting his head lie on your shoulder, ignoring the feeling of his warm tears soaking the fabric of your shirt. "I'm sorry too, for leaving you so easily,"

You stood there with Sunghoon in your arms, inevitably crying along and sobbing out your own apologies, the ones you had owed him and hidden all these years. He held you tight just as you did, and it felt like the nights he had you in his arms whenever you cried. You eventually calmed down whereas Sunghoon was still composing himself, avoiding your gaze.

You took the opportunity to hug him again, tighter and firmer this time, as if trying to stop him from running away.

"Can we start over? I don't want us to be strangers,"

You heard a sniffle, then a shaky breath of relief. "I'd love to,"

Pulling away, you locked eyes with him. They were twinkling brighter than the stars in the skies outside, filled with a spark of hope. "I'll make us some hot tea. Do you want to … stay over?"

"Can I?"

"I really want you to."

It didn't take more to convince Sunghoon to stay, all you had to do was ask and he'd listen.

That night, you and him hid in your room, talking for the whole night until the break of dawn. Nothing about the way he talked had changed, nor his laughter or the crinkles around his eyes when he smiled. He told you about the band and some side gigs, offering to bring you to some too.

You laid there in bed laughing all night, occasionally peeking over the side of your bed to check up on him who slept on the extra mattress, only to meet his eyes and freeze.

The red string of fate tying you and him together was beginning to reform.

Not feeling dread every time you saw Sunghoon was a new start for you. In fact, you were glad to see him.

The misunderstandings and complexity built up over the years were finally addressed, leaving you to peace and a small hope of rebuilding what you had with him. But you kept that thought away for now, holding onto the pieces you had at the moment.

"Come to one of my gigs," Sunghoon made a trip to your house on a random afternoon, a box of your favourite chocolate covered strawberries in his hand. He never forgot anything about you, didn't he?

"Are you bribing me or asking me?" You said despite accepting the box, your heart squeezing at the thought of him remembering the littlest details about you.

"I'm asking you but also offering a gift," he let himself in, almost like always, and you didn't even notice, just letting him do so. "I saw it and I thought of you so I got it,"

"Thanks," you waved the box a little, setting it down on the table and leaning slightly against it. "You still remember,"

His gaze softened. "Of course I do," his hand by his side was itching to reach out, but it never did, instead, he played it off by giving you a smile. "So, what do you say? This Saturday, watch our gig at the pub,"

"Are you singing?"

"I wish I did," he laughed, and you momentarily recalled the times you had karaoke sessions with him. Curse reminiscence. "I play the bass, Heeseung's the front man,"

You nodded slowly, picturing them as a band and smiling slowly. You've missed them, and it was then when you realised it. "I'll go,"

"Really?"

"Obviously, do you want me to say no?"

"Well, no," Sunghoon chuckled, quite literally unable to hide his excitement from the way he's grinning widely. "I'm just … glad, and surprised, and happy,"

You bit back a smile, shaking your head at him. "Text me the details, will you? I don't want to miss it."

Saturday rolled around quickly. You and Yunjin were sitting in a corner of the pub, beers on the table and whispering gossip about some of your high school classmates. High school might've ended years ago but gossip never stopped.

"Alright, folks, the next act is someone you already know, they are not strangers," the manager of the pub stepped onto the small stage, announcing Sunghoon and the guy's band. "Please welcome … April Nights!"

April?

You bit your tongue, an odd feeling boiling in your stomach. April was the month you broke up with Sunghoon and left for university, it was more than just a coincidence for him and his band to have 'April' in their name. All you knew was the sinking feeling never went away.

"You alright?" Yunjin noticed your silence, casting a worried glance at you.

"April …" you mumbled, eyes staring straight ahead at Sunghoon who was setting up his bass on stage. "There must be something behind it,"

"What?"

"Nothing,"

You shook away that feeling currently eating up and put your focus on Sunghoon instead. It wasn't your first time watching him perform. It has always been him on ice in a big arena, but now it was him on a small stage at a dingy pub.

Sunghoon's eyes wandered all over the room, finally landing on you, a smile spreading on his pretty face. You managed a small smile, waving a little to let him know you're there, you're actually there and not a figment of his imagination, a dream that he has been wishing on for far too long.

The first song they played was an ABBA song. To be specific, it was your favourite ABBA song that you would listen to with Sunghoon in the past. Was it a coincidence?

You knew Heeseung had a vocal of stars, but to hear it for the first time in years was sending you into heaven. However, you failed to keep your focus on him, redirecting it to the bassist. You couldn't stop looking at Sunghoon, and his gaze wouldn't leave yours either.

The second song soon came by, and at that point onwards, you knew it wasn't a coincidence. It only took two songs for you to realise that Sunghoon had prepared a set list of your favourite songs. The band was currently playing Iris by The Goo Goo Dolls, a song you had loved ever since forever.

You shouldn't be feeling light headed, but you were.

The set ended almost a few hours later. It was filled with your favourite songs, undoubtedly. The whole time, you were truly holding your breath, especially when Sunghoon was holding your gaze.

While people were filing in and out of the pub gradually, you stayed. It was well past midnight and Yunjin's cheeks were pink from the alcohol, wandering off to join Heeseung and the others. You, on the other hand, were sober as hell, waiting for Sunghoon with nerve wrecking anticipation.

"Hey, hey, hey. How did we do?" Sunghoon slid into a seat like an apparition appearing out of thin air. You jumped a little, but melted into a smile at the sight of him.

"You guys were great," it was genuine, because they did do amazing, probably more than just amazing. "'April nights', an interesting name,"

Realisation dawned on Sunghoon's face, he swallowed thickly. "I—yeah. April was an interesting month,"

"The set list …"

"Right, the set list," he chuckled, shifting on his feet a little nervously and stiffly. "I figured since you're here I'll play some of your favourite songs,"

"Oh," you let out softly, not knowing what else to say, this was something you found yourself acting around Sunghoon now. "That's … nice,"

Sunghoon gouged your expressions and the tone of your voice, a slow frown etching onto his tired face. "Did you not … like it? I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable,"

"No, it's not that! I'm just—" you paused, thinking of an appropriate word to describe how you felt. Frankly, you didn't know your exact feelings. "—surprised and … confused?"

"Confused?"

"Sunghoon, we're exes, and you pulling this isn't exactly helping—this—" you gestured to the space between you and him. "Us,"

Sunghoon was silent for a moment, occasionally opening his mouth to say something just to close it before he could. "I—maybe I read it all wrong, I thought—you know what, forget it,"

"Don't. Just tell me," you reached over for him, but didn't touch his hand. "What are we? We're not exactly best friends nor are we enemies. I don't want any tension between us and I don't want you to think you have zero chance at all," you breathed, searching for his eyes. "I would want us to work out again, if that's what you want too,"

Sunghoon's eyes glistened with a spark of hope, relief washing over his face. It was an answer to his question. "I want us to work out. I want us to have another chance," his hand reached out for yours the first time since you've seen each other, feeling the warmth of his touch that you were no stranger to. He carefully and gently intertwined his hand with yours.

"We'll always find our way back to each other."

It was odd but comforting to know that nothing has changed when it came to you and Sunghoon.

Sunghoon brought you to your favourite places, ate your favourite dishes, did your favourite activities as an attempt to rekindle everything back. Safe to say it was working.

Just like the first dates you had together, you felt yourself having the same bubbly feeling internally, the same giggles you caught yourself having after a stupid joke he made. Despite all that, over the course of a few weeks, it had you wondering about your relationship with him.

"Will you date him again?" Yunjin could tell you were struggling, even if you didn't say it, it was still quite evident.

"What's with the sudden question?"

"Well, considering he has taken you out on so many dates and still hasn't asked you to be his girlfriend again, I could tell you're troubled,"

"Okay, mind reader," you grumbled and shifted in your seat, hating how right she was. "He said he wanted to give us a chance again, so I was expecting that—you know—we'd get back together soon,"

"Your 'soon' seems a bit urgent, but I don't blame you," Yunjin shrugged, gaze softening at your words. "I can tell how much love there still is between the two of you. It's natural to gravitate towards each other, but time, time is what you need to heal the scars, Y/N. It's been years, give yourself time."

You suppose giving yourself time truly was what you needed. But when you mentally said you needed space, you didn't mean wanting Sunghoon to ignore you.

That's right. He was ignoring you.

How did you know? Apparently, the hard way.

Calls, messages were all brushed aside. You didn't even see him physically. At one point, you considered him dead, but seeing him at a party proved to you that he wasn't.

"What the fuck is your problem?"

Cornering him was a challenge, but being headstrong and slightly buzzed, nothing could possibly stop you.

"Y/N?"

"Wow, I'm surprised you remember my name," you seethed, almost stumbling forward and throwing a punch at him. "So, we're playing the game where you get back at me and ghost me after all that we've been through lately? Sweet! Could've given me a head's up though,"

"What? You're the one who's planning to abandon me just like before!"

"What are you even saying?"

"Your email, Y/N. I saw your email. How you have a big job in London and you just can't wait to join, throwing me away like a summer's fling right before you leave,"

"You're not making any sense, I'm not accepting that role!" You were heaving at anger at this point, matching the fumes emitting from Sunghoon's ears. "You dickhead! I'm literally throwing my dreams away and you're here thinking I'm leaving you again? Is that what you thought of first? Oh, maybe you could've just asked me, but you didn't, just like the past,"

Bringing up the past had triggered something not only in you but him. He blinked, keeping silent but chewing anxiously on the inside of his cheek.

"You never changed, huh?"

You heaved a deep breath, shaking your head a little, not to answer his question, but at him.

"Well I guess that makes the both of us."

"I fucked it up, didn't I?"

The night after the confrontation, you woke up on Yunjin's couch with a hangover thanks to your habit of drinking your problems away. Remembering Sunghoon's face and the feelings you felt literally had you shrivelling back into the couch, a deep frown etched on your face.

"Partly, yes, but mostly, no," you felt the couch dip beneath Yunjin's weight as she joined your side, a warm cup of coffee in her hand. "He fucked up first, but I think it's all just a big misunderstanding,"

"I don't we've healed from it," you took the cup from her and drank from it. "He's scared of me leaving and I was considering leaving again. Maybe we're just not meant to be,"

Yunjin sighed, moving her body closer to you and placing a comforting hand on yours. "If you're not leaving, that means you're staying, which also means you get to make it right. You get to have time to mend it all unlike the last time,"

"I have to make it right, don't I?"

A nod of confirmation from Yunjin was all you needed to know your next step. So, you decided to show up at his gig in the same exact pub without thinking through it twice.

"He's not here tonight," Heeseung looked thoroughly puzzled by your sudden appearance, and it seemed none of them knew about the small altercation you had with Sunghoon.

"Really?"

"Yeah, he's been acting a bit … off. We asked him to take a night off, maybe you should give him a call."

If only it was that easy.

Walking back home with a dejected heart was not the plan you had in mind. A part of you even thought this was truly the end, maybe he reached the conclusion of going no contact and you have no choice but to accept it. Was this karma?

It didn't help that you walked past the park that you and Sunghoon used to run off to back in the past. The exact bench which you and him sat on still resided there. Your curious mind led your legs towards it, taking a seat and remembering all the memories you shared with him.

Being alone under the night sky and getting accompanied by the dim light coming from the street lamp had given you a chance to rethink your choices about coming back home, whether it was worth it to see Sunghoon once again and try for the closure you never got. Well, look where it got you now.

The ruffles of the leaves got you snapping your head towards the direction of the noise, but it only landed on a figure.

"Y/N?"

You squinted, waiting until the figure walked under the streetlamp to distinguish that it was … Sunghoon. You should be feeling glad now that he was there in front you, but why were you feeling the exact opposite?

"Sunghoon? W–what are you doing here?" You stood up, watching him getting closer, the anguish in his face was clear.

"I–I … I went to look for you," he started, carefully and slowly inching closer until there's a comfortable distance between you both. "You weren't home and I thought … that was it,"

That was a fatal flaw you and him shared, wasn't it?

"I went to the pub to look for you too," your voice came out in a hushed whisper, breathing becoming ragged. "And you weren't there, so I thought … I thought it was the end too,"

"Fuck's sake, I know I said this many times but I'm sorry, Y/N," he sounded desperate, apologetic and almost exasperated. "I'm sorry for assuming things and ignoring you, I guess I never really got rid of the avoiding thing. I'm just … scared of you leaving me and I can't accept it again,"

"I'm not leaving, Hoonie," you were the first to reach out, to touch him and pull him into your embrace. "I didn't think you'd see that email so I never said anything about it. But I'm not leaving, okay? Not this time, never again. I'm here and I'm staying,"

You heard Sunghoon's quiet breathing next to your ear, his calming heartbeat thrumming against your shoulder. "I'm sorry, I really am, Y/N. I said I wanted to make this right but why does it feel like I'm fucking it all up?"

"You're not, Hoon, trust me. If I have to be honest here, both of us have past scars that aren't healed yet. It takes time, one step at a time, and that was what I learned. I think we're not fully healed from the past," you held onto him tighter, spilling all your hidden truths. "We can make it right, but first, we have to forgive ourselves, forgive each other and move on,"

Sunghoon pulled away a little, but his arms still remained around you. It was the first time you were ever so close to him since the split, wholly vulnerable and showing him your truest emotions.

"I forgive you," he whispered, pearly tears threatening to spill from the edge of his eyes. "And I'm sorry again,"

"I forgive you too," your grip on his jacket tightened, a small comforting smile appearing on your lips, one that Sunghoon reciprocated.

"I don't think I'll ever stop loving you," he confessed, a little out of the blue, but it was something he needed to get out of his system before he burst. "Those years when you were away, I see you in everyone else, I don't think anyone could ever compare. I still love you even after this long,"

Your mind was in a haze upon hearing his confession, sincerity and longing hidden in his words but evident in his eyed. For a moment, you thought of what you could say, but nothing came to mind, so you did the first thing your body told you to. You kissed him. Actually, it was more of a peck, a simple quick peck that was enough to shock both him and you.

"I'm sorry!" You saw his wide eyes and wondered if it was a good time to have even done that.

Sunghoon melted into an expression of adoration, a wide smile etched on his lips, as if in both disbelief and relief that you kissed him. "Don't be sorry," he stepped closer, only an inch measured the distance between you and him. The space became smaller when he leaned down, eyes flickering down to your lips. "Can I?"

Was this happening? "Yeah,"

Sunghoon didn't waste any moment in meeting your lips with his. It was natural, easy, for you to kiss him just like first instinct. The amount of desperation, sadness, anger and love were poured into the way he kissed you. There wasn't any urgency, but it spoke louder than intended.

It was short, but it was enough to let the both you know the true feelings you harboured for each other. By the time you pulled away from him, you felt his eyes on you, a giggle erupted from you unexpectedly, and he started joining in.

You really looked like a lovesick fool standing under the streetlamp with your lover.

"Do you want to stop by that old spot we used to go to?" Sunghoon suggested, a little shyly this time.

"The one nearby?"

"That one,"

"Let's go then." you nodded, casting him a soft smile.

Sunghoon didn't say much, but his hand did the talking by reaching for yours. He held onto it tightly, intertwining his fingers with yours and swinging your interlocked hands as you walked. He might've not said much, but you could tell how he felt.

Feelings might be complicated, and making amends with the history behind a broken relationship was equally challenging, but what mattered most was getting back with the one who you called your soulmate, your lover, your best friend.

☆ permanent taglist (open):

@silentkarnival @strvlveera @freshsaladbowl @bejewelledgirl @fakeuwus @yenqa @hsgwrld @ilovegyuvin @enhacatalog @aishigrey @shinrjj @kgneptun @ilovegyuvin @hyunniesvlog @eleanorheartschishiya @nanabbg @letwiiparkjay @teddywonss @classicroyalty @run2x @yannnnaj @jakesfurry @gyuwooboozle @nylajp24 @usedto-me @vernonburger

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sofs16 · 4 months

Text

𝐋𝐄𝐓 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐁𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐊 𝐌𝐘 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐀𝐆𝐀𝐈𝐍 𐙚˙˖

in which, yn is helplessly in love with charles since their younger days but he has no idea till she’s gone to a different country.

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒°⋆｡ ˚ titled by their song

001 lacy

002.heather

003. cindy lou who

004. i miss you i’m sorry

𝐒𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐃 𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐊 ♫

let you break my heart again — laufey

lacy — olivia rodrigo

heather — conan gray

cindy lou who — sabrina carpenter

i miss you, i’m sorry — gracie abrams

right where you left me — mother taylor swift

mr. perfectly fine — mother taylor swift

i know it won’t work — gracie abrams

goodbye, my danish sweetheart — mitski

𝐓𝐀𝐆 𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓,

@1655clean @uuzhanggggggg @cmleitora @annie115 @valntynebaby @mrosales16 @d3kstar @stopeatread @chimchimjiminie16 @viennakarma @peqch-pie @scaramou @daniellarogers @milialurralde

#charles leclerc x you #charles leclerc fanfic #charles leclerc imagine #charles leclerc #charles leclerc 16 #charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc imagines #social media au #formula 1 #charles leclerc one shot

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uia-uia · 4 months

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A New Spark

PJO

Pairing: PLATONIC!Percy Jackson & Sally Jackson x Mortal! GN!Reader

Words: 904

Summary: You are a child of a fling Gabe had. (Unplanned of course.) So you moved with him when he started dating Sally. (poor queen..) In that time you and Percy started a 'sibling' like relationship, he saw you has his little sibling and you saw him as a big brother, but we all know what happened to Gabe, so what about you?

Warnings: The Timeline is in the end of Book 1: The Lighting Thief and The Start of Book 2: The Sea of Monsters. Gabe! (🤢) English is not my 1st language. Gabe(🤢) Bad home life.

Notes: I'm here again wow. The 3rd time I'm doing this. And of the three works that I published (including this one.) This is the one that came at my head and I wrote instantly. I always loved the idea of Percy with a little sibling. And so here it is. Please PJO fandom we need more platonic content. And thank you for my 1st work 40 hearts it's not a thing I excepted. Hope my 2nd work and this one have the same impact on you. ❤️

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆

Why was Sally enduring all of this? That was your question since you moved to her house with your 'dad', if you even could call him that...you loved him of course, you couldn't force yourself to hate him, but the way he treated Sally and Percy, it made you crazy..maybe you have that force after all?

You get up to say goodbye to Sally and Percy. She was happy, finnaly going to do something she loves and not hear all day my father complains. You still don't know how Sally didn't ditch him earlier. Of course you don't want Percy and Sally to go away, but..it is the best for them, right? You can't be greedy and want them to stay when they were suffering. But it still hurts.

As you enter the room Percy is packing is things to move to they're new home. He looks at you with a sad look.

"You're the only thing Im gonna miss here Y/N." He says.

"It's okay, you can still call, right?" You tell him to reassure not just him but yourself.

He nods thoughtful.

"Yeah, that's right." He smiles at you but the happiness doesn't go to his eyes, his green eyes with almost no shine when he thinks what is going to happen to you when he and his mom.

He knows that your dad used to treat you really bad before dating his mom. After that you were just 'there'.. Somewhat like a ghost to him.

But you always got to him to help you with your homework, even with his ADHD and dyslexia. You loved his mom cooking, but thinking better who didn't. He played with you, after the hell that is school, coming home and having lunch with you and playing Legos, just not caring about anything and ignoring Gabe at the living room, problaly playing poker and drinking his beers.

He started crying in front of you. He didn't want to leave you with that asshole. You didn't deserve a life like that. Maybe if he asked his mom?

When he is distracted you hug him.

"I'm gonna miss you too Perc."

He hugs you back.

After some minutes of hugging Percy goes talk to his mom.

After talking and discussing, Sally agrees with him, and that she was thinking about you coming with them, but that she didn't know what Gabe's reaction would be.

So Sally comes back to the living room where you are seated at a table drawing, Gabe drinking a beer and watching some football game.

"Honey, I want you to be sincere." She says with a calm voice.

You nod confused.

"Do you want to come with us?" She continues.

You look suprised.

"But my dad-" You say looking at him, he didn't heard the question.

"Dear, it is your choice." She tells you with a smile.

You look at him again. You know what screw him. It would be worse if Percy and Sally got away and you were alone.

"I would love to go with you." You tell her.

Gabe hears and gets up, beer bottle still in his hand.

"What did you say little brat?" Before you can say anything he continues and points at Sally. "And you woman, you didn't already screw me to take my kid from me?!" He raises his hand at Sally but before he can do anything Percy is there taking his hand.

"What do you think your are doing to my family asshole?!" He tells Gabe.

"Oh, you little sh!t!" Gabe yells at him.

"You know what, you can take the kid. Im full of all of you, now go away." He yells again and points at you.

"I always knew you weren't good enough." He yells again. "Now go with the ones of your kind."

You start crying but Sally hugs you, she calls Percy and he starts packing your things while Sally calls a taxi.

When it comes you three go to your new house, bags at the car trunk.

Your eyes are still a bit red from the crying but now it doesn't matter, now you have a family, a real one.

You look at Percy and smile.

He smiles back and holds your hand.

Sally smile while looking at you two at the front seat of the taxi.

She was fine, her babies were fine.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆

You are eating cereals at the kitchen, it's the first day of school, both for you and Percy.

He enters the kitchen and sits eating is own breakfast.

"Are you two excited for school?" Sally asks.

"Yes!" You say at the same time that Percy just makes a "Hmm" sound.

Sally nods and looks at Percy.

"Dear let's try to be at one school more time this year, hmm?" She says.

"I will try mom." He says still looking at his food.

"I know, don't worry to much about it."

"Yeah, it's not like you are gonna explode the school or something Perc."

Sally and Percy glance at eachother, you already knew the whole truth but you weren't a clearsighted mortal like Sally.

"Let's hope not." Sally smiles at you.

"Now let's get ready that your friend Tyson is waiting for you Percy." She says.

He nods and you both take your bags, going to school and Sally to work.

Didn't you know that what happened was exactly what you said.

#Spotify #percy jackson and sally jackson #sally jackson #percy jackson #sally jackson x reader #gn reader #percy jackson x gn reader #percy jackson x platonic reader #percy jackson x reader #percy jackson and the olympians x reader #pjo x reader #platonic reader #sally jackson x platonic reader

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gracies-baby · 2 months

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Trouble with Parents

(Gracie Abrams x Reader)

———————————————————

"Gracie.. wait.. your parents are home" Y/n mumbles against Gracie's lips as she lays on her girlfriend's be.

"So just be quiet. The walls are pretty thick" Gracie murmurs in reply as she pushes her lips against her girlfriends again and shifts so her leg is between Y/n's legs.

"Henry is literally in the room next door. Do you want him to hear?" Y/n pushes Gracie away and sits up against the headboard, pushing her shirt back down from where Gracie had moved it.

"C'mon babe, we got caught at school. We have a lock now. We can actually do something" Gracie whines as Y/n sighs in reply before moving closer to her girlfriend and connecting their lips once more, wrapping her arms around Gracie's neck. Gracie slowly pushes her girlfriend back against her bed before they hear a voice.

"Gracie! Y/n! Come down here please!" Gracie's mum yells from downstairs.

"She sounds mad" Y/n whispers as Gracie groans before walking down the stairs, Y/n following behind.

"Mum we were kinda busy, will this take long?" Gracie asks impatiently as she plays with Y/n's fingers.

"I just got off the phone with your principal. Do either of you want to explain to me why he told me you both missed your maths test today?" Katie turns her gaze away from the dinner she was cooking to look the two teenagers in the eye.

"Uh.. we missed the bus.. we had to get the later one" Gracie comes up with an excuse only for her mom to raise an eyebrow at her.

"Really? Because your brother told me your test was in the middle of the day and he saw you both in earlier classes. Apparently this isn't the first time you've skipped class" Gracie gulps audibly as Y/n looks at the carpet with a guilty look in her eyes.

"Ok, fine, we didn't miss the bus. We.. were late to the test and they said we could take it another day" Gracie scrambles for another excuse only for her mother to shut it down.

"Gracie, stop with the excuses. I know what you were doing. A few girls saw you in the bathroom and they went straight to your teacher. Now both of you listen to me. I know you're at that age where you both.. want to be with each other but there is a time and a place for those things. The high school bathroom during a test is not the time nor the place. You live right next door to each other, you don't need to sneak to the bathroom to make out"

"Yes mom, we get it. Are we dismissed?" Gracie mumbles in annoyance as Y/n continues to blush.

"Um, I should probably go home, actually. My moms gonna get mad if I keep spending the night here"

"Sure, I'll walk you" Gracie smiles at her girlfriend as Y/n says goodbye to the older woman before leaving the house with Gracie, hand in hand.

"I'm never making out with you at school again. That was so embarrassing!" Y/n exclaims as they walk down the street to her house.

"It wasn't that bad. My mom knows we do all that stuff. She's just pissed off that we missed the test"

Gracie replies, stopping when they get to her girlfriend's house.

"I don't care. It's either in one of our rooms or you don't get any" Y/n glares at her girlfriend before walking towards her front door.

"Babe, wait" she feels someone grab her arm, turning her around. She's about to speak when her girlfriend softly presses their lips together. Y/n wraps her arms around Gracie's neck as Gracie pulls her closer by her waist.

"Alright, that's enough Abrams" the two pull apart when they hear a voice coming from Y/n's front door.

"Mr. L/n! I was just leaving" Gracie stutters out nervously as she makes eye contact with her girlfriend's dad.

"Say goodbye Y/n" he says to his daughter as he continues to stare at the brunette.

"Bye Gracie. I love you" Y/n says to her girlfriend as she pulls her in for a hug.

"Bye N/n. I'll see you tomorrow, I love you" Gracie gives her girlfriend one last peck on the lips before walking away, saying bye to her girlfriend's dad before hand.

Gracie sighs when she walks back through her front door before walking to her room, only to be stopped by her older brother.

"Damn Gracie. Getting it on at school? How'd you get Y/n to agree to that?" Henry teases causing Gracie to glare at him.

"Ugh, shut up" she grumbles in reply before walking into her room and closing the door behind her.

"Yeah, go call Y/n! Finish it off!" He yells to her teasingly.

"Dude! You're disgusting!" She replies as August stands behind them with a clueless look on his face.

#jenna ortega x reader #taylor swift x reader #gracie abrams #gracie abrams x reader #wednesday addams x reader #tara carpenter x reader #taylor swift

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spamgyu · 5 days

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i miss you, i'm sorry // Soonyoung Oneshot

DESCRIPTION: Soonyoung let his pride get in the way and now he's forced to come to terms of his mistakes... two years too late. PARING: Soonyoung x Reader GENRE: Angst WARNINGS: Mentions of alcohol, not a warning but mention of NCT Taeyong

Highly recommend listening to the following while you read: i know it won't work - gracie abrams i miss you, i'm sorry - gracie abrams

It took him some time to swallow his pride; to own up to his mistakes.

Betraying you.

You two may have not been romantically together for very long; barely hitting the one year mark before the world you knew had been torn apart by the one man you have least expected to do so.

Before becoming officially his, you were a friend – someone who had been around him for nearly every waking moment of his idol life.

Their group's back-up dancer.

And maybe that's why it hurt even more; because maybe you have expected heartache from dating an idol... but you didn't expect a friend to hurt you the way Soonyoung did.

He wished he could forget that day – that whole week, in fact. But no matter where he turned, whatever he did, he was haunted by his actions.

Each time he listened to a love song, each time he saw a happy couple, every time he heard of any of his freinds brag about the connection they shared with their other half – he thought back to you.

And it wasn't long before he thought of the day he ruined it all.

You two had been caught, and not by the reporters that both of you have successfully dodged for months – but by his fans. It seemed fool proof at first, hiding in plain sight.

Who would have suspected a blurred face individual in the background of all their behind the scenes videos?

The answer was everyone.

There had been speculations at first, ones that were quite easy to dismiss – but that day in April, it had come crashing down.

Proof of your long term relationship had been uploaded on all platforms; clips of his lingering stares on stage, subtle glances caught on their behind the scene videos, similar instagram photos and profile pictures, more importantly images of you simply acting as a regular couple leaking from his iCloud.

There was no denying it this time.

Or so you thought.

Soonyoung had always told you that when this happened, he would own up to it. He was now at a place in his career where he was able to protect you from any harsh words of the public – a place where he was more than happy to brag about his relationship status.

But he fell short.

He lied.

He didn't know what came over him at that time, choosing the easy way out – or at least, what he thought was easy at the time.

Your heart sank to the deepest pit of your stomach when you had read the message he had posted on their fan service platform that day, shattering once it reached the bottom.

"Please don't believe any rumors that are being spread. If I was in a relationship, you would hear about it from me first. She is just our back-up dancer. I love you guys~ 🩷🩵"

Just our back-up dancer.

He remembered the tears streaming down your face that day, the only words uttering from your lips was "why?".

Why did he choose to dismiss you as just a staff?

Why didn't he fight for you?

Why didn't he fight for the relationship?

Why did he lie to you?

Why?

Soonyoung didn't have any explanation as to why, he couldn't answer you – simply remaining still as he watched you fall apart in front of him.

He didn't know why he didn't shed a tear that day, allowing for you to walk away without bothering to go after you when you had finally found your composure – silently saying your final goodbye.

His pride had gotten the best of him.

And he continued to allow it to do so for the following months; brushing off his member's attempt to address the situation. He didn't dare blink an eye when you didn't show up to the practices, waving off their choreographer when he had notified him that you were no longer a part of the team.

"I don't care." He scoffed, walking away.

He should have.

Staring at the article pulled up on his phone, sent so kindly by Seungcheol, Soonyoung felt that same sinking feeling he had put you through two years ago – his knees buckling under him.

He could have sworn he was over it, over you.

He came to terms of his mistakes, but he didn't think he would have to face it once again.

SEUNGCHEOL: I know you said it doesn't matter but I think it's best you heard from one of us first [NCT Taeyong confirms relationship with non-idol through social media post.]

The image didn't show your face; the boy, who Soonyoung had shared mutual friends with, had taken a picture in the mirror with a mystery girl hidden behind him. The only indicator of this being you was the arms wrapped around his waist – the arms that was loitered with sticker like tattoos.

The ones Soonyoung used to playfully color in with markers and lazily trace as the two of you laid in his bed.

He remembered all the times you happily showed off a new addition to the collection, each and every single one having a memory attached to it.

Especially the blue ink heart that was etched on to your left thumb – the one that he caressed each time your fingers would lock.

He knew this tattoo had no link to him, but somehow he felt as through he had been kicked down at the sight of his thumb sitting a few centimeters from it.

The heart that was once his.

Shakily taking a seat on the edge of his bed, Soonyoung allowed for his phone to slip from his hands – hitting the floor with a loud smack.

He didn't care if the screen cracked, or if there was any damages to the edges of his unprotected device. All he was focused on was the sudden pain that radiated throughout his body.

You had moved on, you were happy – while he was barely beginning to grieve the end of you.

He had run away from his emotions for the past two years, thinking that it would never come – but once again, he was oh so wrong.

Soonyoung felt as though his lung had been punctured, unable to get enough air into his system as his chest began to heave – the tears had now broken the flood gates.

Gripping the edge comforter, Soonyoung tried bite back the sobs that were now threatening to escape his lips – where was this pain when you had asked, no begged, for him to fight for the love you two shared.

"Soonyoung, please." Your voice shook, but he remained unfazed. "I need to know why."

Even now, he couldn't answer that question.

Soonyoung didn't know why he chose to respond to the scandal the way he did. He didn't know why he let you walk away. He didn't know why he chose to ignore your attempts to reach out for closure.

All he knew was that he was in pain, a great amount of it.

・゜゜・．・゜゜・．・゜゜・．・゜゜・．

He was never good at handling any alcoholic drink, but that didn't stop Soonyoung from ending the past three days with at least one bottle of soju before bed.

It was easier to sleep that way.

In the stillness of the night, he sat alone at the dining table – throwing back another shot of the clear liquid, while his thoughts consumed his brain.

Soonyoung had been out of his game since reading that article, their group's comeback couldn't over power all the images of you that flashed through his mind – no matter how hard he tried to distract himself, his brain found it's way to wander back to you.

As his body began to feel the effects of the fourth shot, Soonyoung began to think of the unthinkable.

It wasn't like you would pick up anyways? You probably had his number blocked. Maybe even changed it.

Anyone would have.

But he needed to hear it – he needed to hear your recorded voice, the one that let a caller know that you have missed their call.

It was the closest thing he could have to hearing your voice.

"Hello?"

"Y/n." He choked out, your voice instantly sobering him up – almost as if a bucket of cold water had been dumped on him.

"Hoshi?"

This time, it felt as though someone had driven yet another knife into his chest – this time right into his heart.

Hoshi.

It wasn't Soonyoung or Soonie.

It was Hoshi.

"I-I–" He tried to fight the sharp ache that pulsed under his ribcage as he searched his brain for the right words to say. "I'm sorry."

Silence.

"Y/n, I'm so sorry." Soonyoung repeated, his voice showing clear evidence of the hurt he had been feeling in the past few days.

"No."

"Wha–"

"No," He couldn't see you but he could practically picture you shaking your head at him, your expression mirroring the firm tone he heard on the other line. "You don't get to call me to apologize after two years of radio silence. You don't get to have the closure that I begged for. No."

There was that knife again; only this time, he didn't care for the discomfort because he knew you were right.

Soonyoung was instantly transported back to the months that followed that god-foresaken day – to the times he watched your notifications come in, only for him to delete it without a reply.

[8:23 pm - April 15] I'm sorry for walking out. Please, I want to talk about it [9:10 pm - April 15] I just want to know why.

[12:03 am - April 18] Y/N: I miss you. I miss us.

[11:28 pm - April 29] You told me you would always be by my side, that you wouldn't let them get to us. Why was it so easy for you to let us go? Did you not mean anything you told me?

[2:09 am - May 7] You were the one that pursued me, you made me fall for you. I was fine being friends. I shouldn't have let you in. I should have kept my distance. One day, I'll learn to realize you were a mistake but for now I want you to know that I love you. It hurts so much but I love you.

You were absolutely right, he didn't deserve to be forgiven.

He didn't deserve to be heard out, not when he covered his ears all while you called out for him.

"Those I love you's, those sweet words, they were all empty. You didn't feel the same way. You were my whole world and I was nothing but a grain of sand to you." He had never heard your voice so cold; the one that used to sound like a soft melodic song in his ears. "You made me fall for you only for you to not be there to catch me. I don't want to hear a single thing you have to say."

"I–"

"Baby!" His voice was heard in the background.

"I'm hanging up. Don't ever call this number again."

The sound of the line ending echoed in his ears as the sob, that was held in his throat, came out as a small hiccup.

PERMANENT TAGLIST

@thegirlwhoimagined @forcheol @ohmygodwhyareallusernamestaken @f4iryjjosh @akeminy @yonabutnotyuna @tacosandbitch @aaniag @bettybotterboughtabitofbutter @xbaekcult @alwaysalmostthere @ashkuuuu @morkswatermelonnnn @isabellah29 @lottogyu @bubbly-moon @lllucere @bo-fairykim @pluviophile-xxx @daegutowns @niktwazny303 @fragmentof-indifference @leah-rose03 @haolistic @eclliipsed @joshuahongnumbers @gyuguys @yaaaridk @christinewithluv @yoonzinoooo @livelikejinki @watercolureyes @whoa-jo @primoisellerose @wonwoobestboyy @rakshithanotrao @mingcouper @aksweet7 @nikkell @raginghellfire @kriizztin @doubleshoticedshakenespresso @porridgesblog @bbysnw @squashcolouredskies

(for some reason it's not allowing me to tag some who wanted to be added to the perm tag list ... cries... pls check ur settings so i can for future posts)

#...... hoshi girls.... dont kill me #this one ..... is something #hoshi x reader #hoshi x yn #soonyoung x reader #soonyoung fic #hoshi angst #soonyoung angst #svt angst #svt fic #hoshi fic

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delicatereader · 5 months

Text

No way! (part 4) - Anakin x reader

summary: you and Anakin finally give in

warnings: smut, name calling (sweetheart, baby)

a/n: guys the series is finally finished! this is my first try at like full on smut ik it's bad but I promise I'll be better in the future. If you have any requests pls do ask! lovee💞

masterlist

➽────────────────────────────❥

The party was weird, weirder than Stephen's usual ones. You and Harry were socialising but stuck together all night as planned. All of your friends were drunk, Ben was knocked out on the spot. You and Anakin were the most sober out of all of them, but you feel the drinks slowly kicking in as the party came to a conclusion. Harry and Eli said their goodbyes and left, and so did Gracie, Tay and Ethan. Ben was sleeping in Stephen's guest room. You and Anakin avoided each other, even though you caught glimpses of him staring into your soul during the festivities. Stephen had disappeared with a mystery girl in his room, so it was your responsibility to clean up.

You started to pick up used red cups next to the moonlit swimming pool as Anakin started to started to sweep up the glitter.

Suddenly you hear some thuds on the stairs, both of you turn your heads to see two girls, walking down the stairs. Their dresses and hair were messy, they carried their heels on their hands giggling. Stephen followed them with a smug grin on his face. Oh god not 3 of them!

"Hey! thanks for cleaning up"

Before you could respond he fell on the couch, falling asleep instantly. You hear Anakin's sigh turn into a laugh

"What?" you ask

"This is just great!" He shakes his head and drops the broom on the floor, bringing his hands to waist.

"What?" you repeat stepping closer to him concerned

"This!" he looks around

"We do this every party its not the first time" you reply

"No..."

"Then what?" you step closer

You could feel his breath on your skin this point, but he takes a step backwards.

"This" he waves his finger to the space between you. You step closer to him closing the gap, you know you shouldn't do this but you can't help it. You look up at him waiting for him to say something. Something, that changes you, your body, your mind, forever. He finally brings his gaze to yours, he looked genuine. Almost vulnerable.

"We can't" he says whispers still so close to you

"What if? just what if we can?" you mutter staring intensely at his lips, which were trying so hard to hold back from yours.

"Your going to regret this" he says shaking his head before bringing his lips to yours

"We'll see" you whisper whilst he you kissing passionately. His hands were intertwined in your hair and yours in his. As the kisses grew more stronger, he wraps your legs around his waist. You grab onto his shirt, suddenly your back hits a wall.

"Sorry" he mutters

"It's fine" you reply kissing his neck

"God y-you feel good"

You feel a scarlett flush invading your face, his face was already red from your kisses.

"You don't understand how long I've been wanting to-" he cuts himself off to place a kiss on your cheek

"Do-" he kisses your other cheek

"This" he's back to kissing your lips. His lips are so soft like his hands that are traveling along the exposed sides of your body. His chest was against your almost bare ones. His hands slowly reach towards the buckle of your overalls as he tries to make marks on your neck. You breath heavily under him, making sure he knows the impact he has on you.

He tilts his head back up to kiss you more. You took this as an opportunity to unbutton his shirt. Surprisingly, he helped you with it and instantly wasted no time to undo the buckle of your overalls on the other side, revealing your underwear. You start to kiss his shoulders leaving a very faint trail of light pink lipstick to his jaw

"Y/n!" he moans in desperatation

In seconds you saw your bra fall on the messy floor, but you were too busy with Anakin's neck to acknowledge it

"Why don't we go someplace more comfortable?" he laughs under his breath, carrying you to the closest empty bedroom whilst kissing you. You found his multi tasking very hot.

"God Ani! I n-need you" you whine getting comfortable in between the sheets

"Patience sweetheart" you could feel his smirk on your stomach. He slowly goes down your stomach and slides of your overalls.

"God you're so wet for me" he whispers kissing your inner thighs, just where you like it.

"Just do it" you mutter in pain

He doesn't hesitate to take your panties off to admire your entire beauty. He starts by kissing your clit slowly already causing a commotion for you. He slides his two fingers inside of you, making you lift your hips. He slowly starts to thrust them

"Oh god!"

He uses his tongue to rub the bundle of nerves slowly. He slowly picks his pace up and moans against your pussy.

"God y/n" he whimpers

"I-Im going to-" you feel yourself close to release, you spread your legs more in pleasure tilting your head up against the headboard

"Cum on my tongue baby, come on" he encourages still keep his fingers in motion.

You feel him pull out of you slowly. He brings his fingers to his mouth licking your cum.

"You taste sweet ,sweetheart" he says looking up at you with a smirk across his face

Before you could relax he takes his pants off and hovers over your body. "Ready for the real ride?" he says winking.

"Mhmm" you moan to reply

He starts kissing you again, this time harder. He bites your lower lip before he digs into your neck again. Your hands travel his back. He rubs his tip against your clit, teasing you and himself.

"Stop it Ani!" you whine wanting him in his full glory

"Ok you asked for it" he whispers slyly

"Oh you're so-" big. big that's what you were trying to say

"Just take it in" he mutters before kissing you softly

He starts to pick up a rhythm as he sees you getting more comfortable. His hands travel your chest whilst you grab his hair in desperation to hold onto something. He thrusts harder and harder

"Oh god!" you moan

All you get as a response was a whimper. He kisses your chin and moves his mouth up and down your neck. You could feel his heavy breath on you

"Oh god Ani! I'm gonna cum" you moan, pulling his hair

"Me too..." he mutters under his panting

He starts to slow down as you both finish

"That. Was. Amazing." you say under your shaking breath as he pull himself out of you and lays next to you

"I know right..." he drags with a grin on his face.

He lifts his hand and runs it through your messy hair, looking into your eyes with nothing but affection.

#hayden christensen #anakin skywalker #fanfic #hayden christensen fanfic #hayden christensen smut #anakin skywalker fanfiction #anakin skywalker smut #anakin x reader #star wars #anakin imagine #star wars smut #star wars anakin #anakin smut #hayden christensen imagine #brother's best friend

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riordanness · 7 months

Text

change - [r.heffley]

1.6K wordcount

warnings: none

requested: no

I never would have guessed that the same day I lost my only friends would be the day I met my new one.

Heather Hills and I had been best friends since second grade. In fifth, Gracie Miller had made our duo a trio, and ever since then we'd been right as anything. Doing everything together, constantly hanging out and sleeping over at each others houses, planning birthday parties together and giggling over boys together.

But this year? Something was different. Heather and Gracie were acting strange. Like, I'd walk up to them while they were talking and they'd get all quiet, real fast. I'd catch them hanging out without me, finding out via social media.

I was trying to ignore the signs, acting as if everything was as it had always been. But I couldn't anymore.

At lunch earlier today, I'd suggested a visit to the mall after school. We hadn't hung out in a while, and I was missing my girls. Sure, we hung out at school everyday, but all the desks were two seater only. I'll leave it to your imagination who was the odd one out.

Besides, I was in desperate need for clothes. My mother had died when I was just a baby, and my dad was always struggling to make ends meet. I had recently grown out of basically all my clothing, so I'd been saving up every scrap of money I could, working odd jobs for all our neighbours, and finally had enough to go on a little shopping trip.

Heather wrinkled her nose. "I have a dentist appointment, and I'm too tired for the mall today."

I nodded. "That's fair. Get a good night's sleep, tonight, yeah?"

She gave me a tight-lipped smile. "Mhm."

I looked at Gracie. "What about you, Cee?"

She hesitated, glanced at Heather, then shook her head. "I- I have a lot of homework I need to catch up on. Sorry."

I smiled. "No worries. We'll find a time to go."

School had finished twenty minutes ago. I'd said goodbye to the girls at the gate, waved as they climbed into Heather's mum's car (Gracie always got a ride home with them as they lived basically next door to each other) and started the fifteen minute walk to the local mall.

Inside, however, I was met with a nasty surprise. Standing together at the smoothie bar, Heather and Gracie were giggling about something, drinks in hand.

I suddenly felt like I had no air. A lump grew in my throat, and I had to fight to not cry. I turn, and storm back outside. I collapse on a park bench a few hundred meters away, in a little sidewalk park.

Hot, angry, betrayed tears fill my eyes, and I don't stop them this time. I feel so stupid, so angry, so hurt. I should've known. I should have seen the signs, not ignored them like I'd tried to. They didn't want me around anymore. They didn't need me.

I don't know how long I stay there, crying, and silently screaming at myself.

Suddenly, I feel a hand on my shoulder. I glance up, startled, and hastily brush at my tears. My glasses have fogged up, a few tears staring the lenses. I pull a tissue from my backpack, and quickly wipe them clean.

"Are you alright?"

I glance again at the person. It's a boy, probably my age, with messy brown hair and pretty eyes. He wears a black tshirt with the words 'fuck the patriarchy' on it, with a blue and black flannel over the top. He has black converse, like me, and denim jeans, also like me.

"H-hi," I manage, my voice scratchy from crying. "Can I help you?"

The boy frowns in concern. "You were crying." He says it like a statement, not a question. Not like he's asking why I was crying, but rather just wondering if I was okay.

"I'm fine." I blink away the fresh tears threatening to rise. I won't cry in front of this cute guy again. Once is embarrassing enough. Twice would be unbearable.

"Okay," the boy says, in a voice that implies he doesn't even kind of believe me. "Want some company? You planning on going shopping?"

I frown slightly. "Uh, yeah. I need new clothes. I've been saving up."

The boy tilts his head. "What size are you?"

My eyes widen in surprise, but before I can speak he yelps a little, holding his hands up in surrender.

"I mean- No! I didn't mean it like that. It's just- I just- I have a lot of spare things I don't wear anymore and well, you look like you might fit them. No use using your savings if you don't have to."

I consider this. Usually I don't like charity much, it makes me feel like a desperately poor person, when I'm not poor, just short on cash. But this boy seems really genuine, and I like his style, so maybe the offer of old clothes is a good one to accept.

"Sure, I'd love that," I say. "I'm Y/n." I stand, holding out my hand to shake.

He smiles, and my day gets just a little brighter. "It's lovely to meet you, Y/n. Now c'mon. I'll drive you to my place."

I follow him to the carpark, and he opens the shotgun door of a white van, marked with "Löded Diper" on the side.

"Should I be worried about getting into a white van belonging to a total stranger?" I ask teasingly.

The boy laughs. "Nah, you're good. The only people I'm kidnapping with this van are my little dork brother and his friend."

I laugh, climb into the van, and let him shut the door. When he slides into the drivers seat, I look over at him.

"You know, I still don't know your name."

He looks at me with a mischievous glint in his eye. "Would you believe me if I told you my name was Sir Lancelot Broccoli Vladimir the First?"

I pretend to consider it. "Hmmm, no, not really."

I look at him, and for a whole second we hold the serious act. Then we explode to a fit of laughter.

"No, but really," I manage, striving for composure. "What is your name?"

"Rodrick," he says. "Rodrick Heffley."

"Well it's lovely to meet you, Rodrick Heffley."

He grins. "Okay, Y/n Whatever-Your-Last-Name-Is, ready for a dangerous drive back to my place?"

I raise an eyebrow. "Why not?"

In hindsight, I would've preferred walking there, but Rodrick, and his eyes and his smile and his laugh, they made the almost terrifying experience of his driving kinda worth it.

His house was simple and white, the yard pretty but plain. It looked like a totally normal home.

Rodrick opens the front door for me, holding it open as he smiles down at me. I return it as I duck under his arm, and step into the hallway.

A women steps into the hall, a small boy in her arms. She's pretty, with glasses and shiny brown hair. she sees me and smiles in pleasant surprise.

"Oh, hello there." She steps over and hold her hand out. "I'm Susan. It's lovely to meet you."

As I shake her hand, she glances at Rodrick, a thousand questions in her eyes.

"She's a friend," Rodrick says. "Don't make it weird, Mum."

She smiles. "Oh no no, I won't, honey, I promise."

"Come on, Y/n," Rodrick says, and grabs my hand, steering me away from his mother.

We climb the stairs, passing an adorable dog (who wanted pats that I'd gladly given) and a younger brother, who doesn't give us a second glance.

Upstairs, we enter Rodrick's room. It's surprisingly tidy for a teenage boy's. He has a drum kit, a lot of rock band posters and magazines, and a few piles of clothes and school supplies.

"You play?" I ask, gesturing at the drums.

Rodrick smiles shyly, his gaze sliding to meet mine. "Uh, yeah. I'm in a band."

I raise an eyebrow. "Oh yeah? That's sick, man. I wish I could play the drums. But I've never had the money to get my own kit or anything."

"I could... teach you if you'd like?"

At his suggestion, I hesitate. "I couldn't pay you..."

Rodrick gives me a look. "As if I'd charge you, love."

I flush, and look away.

"Okay..." Rodrick gets all embarrassed, turns in a circle, then digs through his closet for a moment. He pulls out a small tub of neatly folded clothes (I suspect his mother folded them for him), and places it on his bed.

"Here ya are, Y/n/n."

"Y/n/n?" I ask with a small laugh. "That's a new one."

"Is it?" he asks curiously. "So I'm the only one to ever call you that?"

I nod. "Yep, pretty sure."

"Good." He smiles. It's contagious, so I smile right back at him.

"Now," he says, pushing the box towards me. "Take whatever you like."

It's filled with mostly tshirts and hoodies and sweaters, which is perfect, as I have basically no need for new jeans at the moment.

I pull one of the hoodies on, a maroon one with the words "you and i got lost in it" in small, simple writing down one sleeve. It's almost a perfect fit, just a little bit big in all the right place.

"Are all the clothes in this box the same size?" I ask, and Rodrick nods, but he can't tear his eyes away from me.

"What is it?" I laugh.

"N-nothing," he stammers, his cheeks tinting pick and his voice going higher. I bite back an amused smile, and just give him a little meaningful look.

"It's just..." he sighs. "You just look really damn pretty in my clothes."

I instantly get flustered, but can't help my smile. This afternoon might have started pretty awfully, but I could tell it was going to be an amazing night.

#rodrick heffley #fanfiction #diary of a wimpy kid #fanfic #rodrick heffley x reader #rodrick heffley fanfiction #doawk

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mysunshinetemptress · 8 months

Text

All I know

Here it is hope you like it :)

Warnings: elements of underage drinking but other then that none

Y/n sighed as she helped unloaded the truck, the noise of people preparing for tonight’s event around her made her smile she loved this part of the rodeo the calm before the storm. Y/n wasn’t partaking in tonights events she left the bull riding to her brothers who themselves where told they weren’t allowed partake after their 28th birthday, their father had put strict rules down in order to keep the future of the Ranch safe and if they where going to be professional bull riders the the future of the Ranch wouldn’t be safe. That’s why tonight Beck and Tristan where the only two Wesso boys riding, Will had turned 28 three months previously which had caused an argument that Y/n still didn’t fully think was resolved but she definitely wasn’t going to be the one to ask.

“Will, Y/n go with your Mom I’m going to go book your brothers in.” Y/n nodded following her Mom in search for her cousin “You going to find your wife tonight Will.” Will shoved his sister “shut your mouth I ain’t finding a wife at a rodeo.” Y/n laughed “well you never know.” Y/n laughed again as Will went to push her “Will stop shoving your sister and Y/n stop windin him up come on now.” Y/n jumped hearing a scream before feeling something hit her back “oh my god I missed you.” Y/n laughed pulling her cousin Savannah into a hug, the pair where best friends only being three days apart they spent every waking moment of their childhood together she was the closest thing Y/n had to a sister “I missed you too Bailey.” Savannah laughed at the nickname they had called each other the same names as their horses stating it would strengthen their bond between them and their horse as well as each other. “Tex you remember my roommate Grace.” Y/n looked past Savannah to a copper haired girl “yeah you came to thanksgiving last year, it’s nice to see you again.” Gracie smiled at Y/n pulling her into a hug “watch her hat Gracie she’s very particular about it, so don’t knock it off her head.” Y/n rolled her eyes a “you ready for tonight.” Gracie asked Y/n nodded nervously she liked parties in Texas they where normally chill enough but what was a party in California going to be like. “It’s ok Tex your going to fit right in.” Y/n eyes Savannah suspiciously. “We are gonna go get some drinks but we will meet y’all at the seats.” Y/n waved goodbye to Gracie and her cousin before turning back to her oldest brother and mom “I swear to god that girl better not try convince me to go to this college I’m going to tonight cause I ain’t going.” Will laughed shaking his head “Y/n your the only one out of all of us who applied to college and when you got in you turned it down.” Y/n nodded “yep sure did.”

Y/n sat between her father and Savannah as she looked on at the riders currently participating in barrel racing “why didn’t you ever get into this Tex.” Y/n looked at her father then back to Savannah “Daddy wouldn’t let me said it was to dangerous, and then you remember Kelsey Wallic, she was two years above is in middle well after her accident there was no point in arguing with him about it.” Savannah laughed, Y/n had was the type of girl who looked for her father’s approval on everything, always did what she was told, let them know where she was going and with who and what time she would be back and she would always be back on that time. Savannah can’t remember a time where she was any different but she knows she was the parents of their family always talked about how wild she used to be but those stories always stopped by the time Y/n was four, “Curiosity killed a cat.” Is what she was always told anytime she tried to ask but she also wondered if it had any link to why Y/n was so particular about her hat whether it was a trucker hat or her cowboy hat Y/n was rarely seen without one on her head.

Y/n ran from her family and Gracie jumping on Beck and Tristan “that’s the best any of you have ever placed at the Rodeo.” Beck smiled pulling Y/n into him “well I was concentrating on you screaming the entire time that may have helped.” Tristan nodded “yeah but only a little.” Y/n shoved the pair as the family began walking back to the pickups “right so we are dropin you three off and heading back to the hotel, we are leavin 12 on the dot so don’t be late y/n.” Y/n nodded “yes Daddy I promise I won’t be late.”

Y/n sighed feeling her hands start to sweat as she made her way up to the house with Savannah and Gracie “you will be ok Y/n I promise it will be a goodnight.” Gracie smiled squeezing Y/n’s arm trying to reassure her. Y/n sent her a short smile in appreciation “thanks Gracie.”

Y/n looked around surprised before she started laughing turning to look at the pair behind her “you brought me to a cowboy themed party.” Savannah started laughing “Told you would fit in fine Tex, now you don’t have to fret over wearing your hat.” Gracie laughed watching the pair.

Y/n looked around the room amused this was to funny people dressed up how they thought cowboys dressed up other people dressed up with the aim to show as much skin as possible, if her brothers could see all these people they would stand here point and laugh. “You only come to parties to people watch or do you get in on the fun.” Y/n turned towards the voice, y/n felt the air get caught in her throat as she stared at the beautiful girl in front of her “eh no not tonight I’ve got an early mornin tomorrow.” The mystery girl laughed “you know I’m pretty sure the accent isn’t a requirement to get into the party but it’s really good.” It was Y/n’s turn to laugh “it’s not well shit I’ve been practicing real hard.” The mystery girl laughed again “I’m Jenna, and it is mighty fine to meet you.” Y/n laughed at Jenna’s southern accent “that’s not bad if I hadn’t heard your accent first I might have just believed it, I’m Y/n.” Jenna smiled “so do I get to hear your real accent now that we aren’t strangers.” Y/n smiled “I’m afraid this is it.” Jenna felt her cheeks heat up and she was thankful for the dark lighting “oh god your actually southern, I wasn’t doing it to offend you I was just trying to joke around.” Y/n laughed placing her hand on Jenna’s arm “it’s ok, I wasn’t offended, I’m from Texas, where are you from.” Jenna smiled greatfully “I’m from California, Coachella to be more specific.” Y/n smiled “your a good bit away from Texas what has you here.” Y/n laughed “here at this very party or here as in California.” Jenna smiled “both.” Y/n looked over towards the crowd of people before looking back to the brunette “I’m in California for a rodeo that I went to earlier and I’m at this party because my cousin that blonde over there rubbing herself on that poor boy and her roommate that copper haired girl who keeps looking over here invited me.” Jenna smiled “what brings you to this party.” Jenna froze momentarily debating on what she should say before looking into Y/n’s eyes and suddenly relaxing “this is one of the few nights I had planned where I get to be normal.” Jenna couldn’t help the butterflies that erupted as she watched Y/n’s eyes knit forward “what do you mean.” Jenna smiled at her “I filmed a tv show a while back it comes out in about a month I got a month left to be just me before all the mayhem starts.” Y/n smiled at her “well I’m glad I get to meet you as normal Jenna.” Jenna smiled studying Y/n’s features “can I try on your hat.” Y/n laughed again “no.”

Jenna and Y/n sat talking to each other in a quite corner of the room, before they where interrupted by Savannah and Gracie “Tex, we have been looking for you what are you doing sitting over here.” Y/n smiled at Savannah clearly tipsy “I’m talkin to Jenna.” The older girls looked to the brunette sitting beside her “hey I know you.” Gracie piped up, Jenna continued smiling but Y/n could tell something had changed her body language giving it away. “Yeah Gracie I’m sure you do, what do you guys need.” Savannah laughed “nothing Tex we just had no idea where you wandered off to so we came lookin but your alright so we are going to get more drinks.” Y/n sighed “be safe Bailey.” Savannah turned looking to her younger cousin “you know tipsy or not I can knock an asshole to the ground don’t worry about us.” Y/n laughed waving them off as she turned back to Jenna. “You ok.” Jenna smiled “I will be if you let me wear your hat.” Y/n laughed shaking her head “no.” Jenna whined “why not come on we are friends now.” Y/n smiled “I got hat hair and it ain’t pretty.”

Y/n couldn’t tell you what time it was but in all honesty she didn’t care sitting on some dirty old couch talking to Jenna about anything and everything the world just seemed to disappear “hold on now I just realised if we are going to take this friendship seriously I need to know your birthday.” Jenna laughed at Y/n’s seriousness “really you want to know my birthday.” Y/n nodded “yep.” Jenna laughed again “it’s already past it doesn’t matter.” Y/n shook her head “nope I need to know.” Jenna smiled “the 27th of September, so I just turned 20.” Y/n smiled “well happy birthday.” Jenna laughed again “thank you, so when’s yours.” Y/n smiled “mines about two weeks out.” Jenna smiled letting out a huff “hey I told you mine it’s only fair.” Y/n laughed “okay fine, it’s October 31st, I’ll be 20 in two weeks time.” Jenna looked at Y/n amazed “that is the coolest birthday ever.” Y/n laughed at Jenna’s excitement “it’s pretty cool I can’t lie.” Y/n sighed staring at Jenna taking in her features getting lost in counting the freckles that formed on Jenna’s cheeks before she was pulled back to reality feeling her hat move on her head “nope.” Jenna laughed at getting caught “come on Y/n we just took a big step in our friendship telling each other our birthdays let me wear it.” Y/n smiled shaking her head before her attention was pulled to the boy standing in front of them. “I couldn’t help but notice how beautiful you where.” Y/n looked over at Jenna who smiled at the compliment the boy had just offered her “thank you.” Y/n watched him eyeing up his outfit, his version of a cowboy outfit included boots jeans a white tank top and some cheap hat he has to have picked up at the dollar store, y/n couldn’t help but laugh as she looked at him drawing Jenna’s attention towards her for a second before the boy started talking again “I was going to ask you to dance but I have a better idea, care to wear the hat and ride the cowboy.” Y/n watched him reach up to grab his hat before she pulled hers off placing it on Jenna’s head. “I recommend you walk away before I do something I might regret.” The boy soon shuffled away before Y/n turned back to Jenna. “Seriously all it took for me to get your hat was for some guy to flirt with me.” Y/n shook her head standing up “he wasn’t flirting Jenna he was being gross.” Jenna looked at Y/n confused standing up from the couch “ I don’t understand.” Y/n looked around the room before her attention was takin back to Jenna as the brunette grabbed her hand “want to get out of here.” Y/n looked around spotting Savannah at the far side of the room “yeah but I got to get something first.” Jenna grabbed Y/n’s hand lacing her fingers through the Texans as Y/n pulled her through the crowd. When they reached Savannah Jenna couldn’t help the smile that spread across her face as Y/n squeezed her hand “I need your hat Bailey.” Savannah turned looking at Y/n confused before she looked at Jenna realising why “oh your gettin some tonight.” Y/n shook her head thankful the dark lights hid the blush spreading across her face “no I’m not but I’m leaving and I need a hat so.” Savannah laughed pulling her hat off her head “I want that back you hear me.” Y/n looked at her seriously “I don’t plan on keepin it, I promise.”

Jenna followed behind Y/n through the crowds of people as she watched Y/n readjust the hat on her head “uhhhh.” Jenna looked at Y/n confused “what’s wrong.” Y/n looked at Jenna “Savannah has her shaped weirdly I don’t like the way it’s sitting on my head.” Jenna smiled at the Texan “well yours is lovely sits perfectly on my head.” Y/n couldn’t help but laugh at Jenna “aww I’m glad but I’m going to need it back at some point.”

The pair walked around never letting go of each others hand before stopping and sitting in a park. “Can I ask a question.” Y/n nodded picking at the grass “what did that boy mean, like why did you give me your hat while he was talking to me.” Y/n sighed “he said wear the hat ride the cowboy, it’s a country thing ehm when a cowboy gives you his hat and says something like that it means he wants to have sex with you.” Jenna looked at Y/n as it slowly sank in what the boy meant “oh.” Y/n just looked at the trees as Jenna cleared her throat “so does that mean you want to have sex with me.” Y/n looked at Jenna feeling her cheeks start to redden “no, I gave you my hat so he wouldn’t try put his on your head and I’m letting you wear it that’s why I went and took Savannahs.” Jenna looked at Y/n confused “why not just take it back.” Y/n smiled grabbing Jenna’s hand “cause I’m telling all the cowboys out there that I want to see you again that I’m interested in seeing you again, you understand.” Jenna looked down at Y/n’s hand “as a friend.” Y/n felt her heart sink “yeah yeah of course.” Jenna pulled out her phone “I better get going but why don’t you give me your number and we can text, I want to see you again too.” Y/n smiled reaching out taking Jenna’s phone before typing in her number. “You got instagram.” Jenna nodded “what is it I want to follow it before you are anyone different then normal Jenna.” Jenna laughed putting her name in the search bar and clicking follow. The pair stood up before Jenna grabbed Y/n into a tight hug “thank you, tonight was the most normal I have felt in awhile.” Y/n smiled at the brunette “no problem, now anytime you want to feel normal I’m only a phone call away.” Jenna smiled squeezing Y/n one more time before pulling away and walking off “hey, I’m gonna need my hat back.” Jenna laughed “well then how are all the cowboy’s going to know you want to see me again.” Y/n laughed “they’ll know.” Jenna shook her head “I’m taking this as insurance, your going to need it back and I want to see you again so this way I know you will.” Y/n let out a huff but nothing else and smiled as Jenna turned to walk off before collecting her self and making her way back to the hotel.

A/n

First chapter done, I’m still trying to work out how it’s going to progress but for now I hope it’s ok

P.s Jenna kept laughing cause your so funny

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