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andreafmn · 4 months

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12 Days of Ficmas ❅ Day 4

Word Count: 1.6K Paring: Lip Gallagher x Fem!Reader Prompt @a-cure-for-writers-block: mothering their S/Os younger siblings and making sure they're getting enough to eat

Summary: Lip Gallagher has had a hell of a year, and most of the time he doesn't think he deserve the mercy he's been shown. But (Y/N) will stop at nothing to make sure he and his family know they are taken care of. And he knows it.

A/N: a bit late, but still published. Also, this is very short and sweet and does not follow the canon after season 5. Kind of went off path to give Lip a bit of a quicker redemption. Hope y'all enjoy!

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“Yo, Lip,” Ian’s sleepy voice rang through his brother’s phone. “Uh, your girlfriend is over here, and I think she’s gone crazy.”

“What you mean?” Lip chuckled as he rubbed his hands together to warm them up. “‘Cause that’s a lot coming from you.”

“Very funny,” he laughed sarcastically. “No, but she made Christmas puke on the house, and she’s been cooking nonstop since this morning. She hounded us all morning until we ate breakfast and wouldn’t stop until we sat down at the table.” ”

Lip couldn’t help the smile that crept onto his face as he pictured his girlfriend with her face dirtied by food, her hair tied back and away from her face, and her voice carrying around the house as she made sure everyone had eaten. It was one of the things he loved about her and one of the reasons he was glad she had come into his life. “Look, I’ll be home soon,” he chuckled. “Can you just make sure she actually eats? I know she’s gonna forget.”

“Fine,” Ian groaned. “Just hurry up.”

(Y/N) had come into Lip’s life at a moment when he was sure his life would have gone down the rails. She has become his sense of normalcy in his less-than-normal life. He had needed something to ground him back to earth, and that was exactly what she had done. After being so close to rock bottom he could taste the soil on the ground, she had been the only one that had been able to bring him back to his feet.

As he got off the L, he wondered what she could have ever seen in him. She was smart and beautiful and a complete juxtaposition to the man he was. She was sunshine where he was rain, she was happiness where he was gloom, she was future while he was stuck in the past. And she was everything he never thought he needed.

The moment he reached the house, he could hear the chatter from his family and the smell of (Y/N)’s cooking. Inside, Liam, Carl, and Ian were hypnotized by the TV while (Y/N) and Debbie talked away in the kitchen.

Ian had not lied. The Gallagher house had been decorated like it had never been before. From garlands to stockings above the fireplace, to a massive Christmas tree in front of the stairs, it was a scene that had never lived inside that house. “Yo, you weren’t kidding, huh?” Lip chuckled as he shook off his jacket. “Didn’t think we’d ever have these many decorations.”

“And presents,” Carl grinned. “Check under the tree.”

Just like his younger brother had pointed, under the pine rested a couple of boxes wrapped in kraft paper. Each of them had every one of the Gallagher’s names written on them and a glittering red bow around them. It truly was more than Lip could have ever expected.

“Ian, did she eat something?”

“Yeah,” he said. “She’s also been pecking at everything she’s doing.”

“Alright, thanks.”

Taking the scenery in, Lip walked into the kitchen to find (Y/N) wearing a dirty apron and plates balanced on her arms.

“You’re home,” she smiled, kissing his cheek as she walked past him to give the three boys each a plate. “Good. There’s a plate for you in the microwave. I made some turkey sandwiches for lunch. Light enough to not fill you guys up for dinner but strong enough to tide you over until then.”

“Thanks, (Y/N),” the boys chorused before digging into their sandwiches and focusing back on the TV.

“This is so good, (Y/N),” Debbie exclaimed from the breakfast table. “I don’t know how you’re not studying to be a chef.”

“I cook for fun, not for work,” the young woman smiled. “That’s what engineering school is for.”

“I’m just saying,” she shrugged. “If the genius stuff doesn’t work out, you could definitely be a chef.”

“Thank you, Debs,” (Y/N) responded. “And speaking of school, how was your last final, babe? I know this semester has been a bit hard.”

Understatement of the century, Lip had thought. He couldn’t understand how he had not been expelled after everything he had done the year before. He had been so close to losing it all. Had it not been for (Y/N) stopping him before he smashed Youens car and speaking up on his behalf at the disciplinary meeting, he was sure he would have gotten a worse punishment than a semester suspension. She had been the saving grace he didn’t know he needed, and she was the reason he understood he needed help.

Lip had inherited more than a hard life from his parents, he’d fallen victim to their addictive genetics and gone off the deep end with a bottle of liquor in hand. But somehow, she had been there to pull him up while he was down and walk beside him as he got back onto the right path. She stayed with him as he rebuilt himself into the man people believed he was.

“I think it went pretty well,” he said before taking a bite of his sandwich. “Won’t know until after the break, but if midterms were anything to go by, I did good.”

“That’s good. I’m pretty sure you did very well,” she smiled as she sat beside him, placing a hand on his and a coffee cup in front of his plate. “And I know you’re tired, but I’m gonna need you to help me prep the table for dinner tonight. Kev, V, and the girls are coming over. Fiona can’t make it, but she’ll try for actual Christmas Day or New Year's.”

“You’ve got everything planned out already, don’t you?” Lip chuckled. “Not that I am surprised in any way, shape or form.”

“I would have told you earlier, but I wanted you to focus on your exams,” she said before turning to the boys in the living room. “Hey, guys! Remember to wash your dishes when you’re done! I’m gonna need them for tonight.”

“Yes, (Y/N),” they chorused back.

“You got them very well trained,” Debbie laughed. “Where have you been all our lives?”

“Just on the other side of town,” the girl smiled. “Now hurry and finish eating. We’ve got work to do.”

After everyone finished their lunch and the how was suddenly dispersed of children, (Y/N) and Lip set off to work. While she waltzed around the kitchen, he rearranged the formal dining area to fit all the guests. As he walked around the house, the young man wanted to laugh. He remembered a time when that type of domesticity would have sent him running, searching for the easiest way to drown his fears of commitment and stability. But there he was, setting tables for a dinner party that his girlfriend had cooked, and he didn’t feel the jittery need to escape. He didn’t feel the anxious desire to feel alcohol burn its way down his throat and fill him with a mirage of confidence. He wanted to stay.

“Hey,” he whispered after he had finished his task, snaking his arms around her waist and kissing her cheeks. “Thanks for doing this.”

“Of course,” she smiled, leaning into the comfort and warmth of his touch. “Do you think there’s enough food I don’t know if I should set out some snacks for the kids while the turkey is finished. Maybe dinner is too late for Jemma and Amy. I should set some snacks out.”

“(Y/N), baby,” he chuckled. Lip flipped her around, kissing her lips softly to stop her rambling. “There’s enough food, and they should be starving by dinner. You worked hard enough on all these dishes, they need to be eaten.”

“And they will, but…”

“You really enjoy mommying them, don’t you?” Lip grinned lovingly. “You know they’re not kids anymore –other than Liam. The other ones are all teenagers, they know how to get food when they’re hungry.”

“I know that. But I just wanna make sure they know there’s someone here that cares about them other than you now that Fiona’s gone,” she admitted, her eyes falling onto the hands she pressed to his chest. “And I want them to like me, Lip. I’m in it for the long run, babe.”

“If there’s one thing I can assure you, it’s that the Gallagher family loves you,” he smiled. His hand caressed her cheek softly, and it surprised him that only a year before, his knuckles would have been ripped and bloodied. But not with her. Never with her. “And if you keep cooking like this for them, they’ll make sure you’re here forever.”

“And what about you? Would you want me to stay forever?”

Lip couldn’t help the smile that spread across his mouth. As he stared into her eyes, it took everything inside him not to spoil the plans he had for Christmas morning. He wanted to give her all the reassurance she could need with the ring he had hidden deep in his underwear drawer. But when he had a plan, it was hard to divert from it. “How could I want anything else?” he grinned. “Now, why don’t we finish up here so we can have a little treat before dinner ourselves?”

“Philip Gallagher,” she exclaimed at his advance, slapping his chest playfully. “I have too much work to do to be thinking about that.”

“Come on, I’ve only been thinking about this all day,” he groaned. “It’s the only thing that got me through that test.”

“Then you can wait a bit more,” she laughed. “I promise I’ll make it worth your while, baby. All good things come to those who wait.”

And, at that moment, she had no idea how much truth there was in that statement.

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astrobiscuits · 11 months

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Astro observations part 4

Hii loves, hope you're all doing well as usual <3

I'm sorry for not posting for a while, currently it's exam season here and my mood has been up and down (but atleast i'm passing all my exams!!📚). More in-depth astrology posts are coming soon, so staayy tuned :33

Anyway, here are more astro observations for you. Enjoy!!❤️

🦋 Aries rising and Leo rising have got tattoos (for some reason the ones i know irl have got tattoos on their lower arm)

🦋 Venus retrograde individuals might self-sabotage when it comes to love. They suppress their romantic feelings more often

🦋 Sagittarius on the 2nd house cusp enjoy eating another’s culture cuisine every week

Ex. This week they might eat Mexican cuisine. Next week they’re gonna switch to Italian cuisine etc.

🦋 Sun conjunct ASC individuals are the portrayal of every stereotype about their rising sign. They emobody "what you see is what you get" energy (unless their Sun is in 12th house)

🦋 Mars in 6th house individuals might box as part of their daily routine

🦋 When it comes to Lunar Return charts, having a well aspected Sun in 10th house means you’ll likely get a job/a promotion that month

🦋 Another theory of mine (which i have tested & found to be true) is regarding name asteroids in persona charts. The persona chart of your name asteroid indicates the way you see yourself, while other people's persona charts regarding your name asteroid indicate how they see you

Usually other people can feel your big 3's energy, even if they can't pinpoint your exact zodiac sign. I noticed most of my friends & family see me as an aries/leo/scorpio/cancer sun and i'm a scorpio sun, aries moon and there's some truth to it. I tend to be quite shy and sweet irl, but unless you know me well, you won't notice i'm a scorpio (i do a lot of scorpio things behind people's back). Also...a lot of people see me as a gemini moon??? I have no gemini in my chart :D but i do like joking quite a lot and i'm glad people see me as intelligent

🦋 If someone has asteroid Hazard (9305) conjuncting one of your personal planets/angles, they'll bring chaos to that part of yourself. If they've got asteroid Hazard (9305) conjunct your North Node/South Node, they either brought you a lot of chaos in a past life or they're gonna bring you chaos in this life, which will teach you a lesson meant to help you fulfill your North Node's mission

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violetrainbow412-blog · 8 months

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Cigarettes [S. R.]

Best friend!Spencer Reid x fem!reader

word count: 2.5k

Summary: Spencer comforts you after you learn some bad news about your relationship.

contents: hurt/comfort, talk about addictions, smoking, insomnia, cheating, mention of traumas (mainly from Spencer) no really romantic feelings. Thought at some point in season 4

Spencer rolled over in the hotel bed again, for perhaps the fifth time in less than half an hour, and knowing that lying down was useless, he got up to turn on the light. The trip to Los Angeles had been exhausting and by the nature of the case you had had to move all over the city during the day, so he was tired, but he just couldn't sleep.

There had been a lot going on in his life lately and ever since the trip to Vegas and meeting his father he had been feeling a little restless, despite the surprising turn things had ended up taking, and that included having a few bad dreams or not having them at all.

He took out the folders with information on the case and tried to go through them to find anything that would be useful, but after a couple of minutes he realized that he couldn't concentrate and this only ended up frustrating him. Suddenly he remembered that he had seen a small terrace when you were just getting settled and he thought that, with any luck, he could stay there for a while to get some fresh air and clear his mind. He just took the room keys and headed down the hall, passing a rather inebriated couple who were struggling to open the door between giggles. For some reason this amused him and he even thought about coming back to help them, but in the end he didn't.

When he felt the night breeze, he was grateful for having put on a cardigan and was so lost in thought of him that he didn't even realize there was already a person on the terrace until said presence turned to look at him.

“Oh, sorry, I…” he started to say, but his words trailed off when he realized who it was “Y/N?”

"Reid," you said, sounding a bit taken aback. The first thing Spencer noticed was the smoke surrounding you and suddenly his gaze fell to the lit cigarette in your hand.

He didn't want to say anything at first, so he just walked over to you and leaned against the railing.

“Six minutes”

"I know" you muttered defeated.

Spencer had once told you that for every cigarette you smoked, you were subtracting six minutes from your life, and when the situation demanded it, he would remind you. Even with this you took another puff, which worried the man watching you.

You two had a rather unique relationship, unlike the one you had with any other team member. When Tobias Hankel kidnapped him, despite the fact that you had known each other for relatively few years, you were the only one who dared to confront his apathetic and hostile attitude to ask him what the hell was happening with his life. Initially you thought it was just the aftermath of the trauma, but over the days you realized there was something else. You knew how to recognize an addict because you were one, even though the source of it was completely different.

When you suggested such a thing he was reluctant to talk to you, and of course you didn't blame him, until after a few weeks one night he knocked on the door of your hotel room to finally confess things to you. When he found out about your smoking problems in some sick way he was glad that you could understand him so well and at that moment he brought the two of you together inexplicably. You started attending AA meetings without anyone else knowing and after some effort you agreed to make a pact; you weren't going to smoke if he didn't inject Dilaudid. And to avoid this, every time you thought about doing it, you would turn to the other to make you see reason.

It was obvious that you had just broken that promise and you probably didn't expect him to find out, but your friend's insomnia problems had conspired terribly against you.

"Are you okay?" he whispered. You were a short distance away so instinctively your hand moved away so the smoke wouldn't bother the man, but your body sought the warmth of his on its own.

You didn't answer for a while and he thought that perhaps the case had affected you more and he wondered why you hadn't gone looking for him like you always did, even coming to believe that he had made some mistake that made you lose trust in him. During that dead time Spencer noticed how your eyes glazed over as you looked at the horizon, and then you finally spoke, but not before bringing the cigarette to your lips again.

“I think Paul is cheating on me”

How was Spencer supposed to respond to that? Paul had been your boyfriend for a year and, to be honest, he had always disliked him. He was a conceited idiot who in his opinion didn't deserve even the smallest bit of your affection, but since he was attractive and you seemed too enamored he never dared to say anything to you about it. More than once you had come to work with clear signs of having cried the night before and Spencer knew that as soon as he saw a mark of violence in you he would summon all the courage he had to face that man and file a complaint against him if necessary. And now that you were crying over him and smoking again because of him, Spencer felt her blood boil.

"Why do you think that?"

“He's been really weird lately” you exclaimed shakily “And it wasn't even his behavior, but… there was something about him. I mean, we're profilers, we can tell when something's not right, you know what I mean?” You still didn't look at him, but this didn't stop him from nodding. "It's been weeks, so I became suspicious and started paying more attention to the things he said, how I looked, his clothes, everything. Last night when he got into the shower he left his work phone unlocked and even though I knew he was avoiding his privacy I was too curious so I checked it and found too many calls to the same number. I wrote it and this morning I sent a message from my own phone pretending to be him from a new number and… well, you can imagine”

"Did she say something suspicious?"

“She asked me when we would see each other and she said that she missed me. So I called just to check and indeed a woman answered, so it is not difficult to reach a conclusion” at this point a few tears were already slipping down your cheeks, so to swallow them you sucked again on the tobacco; deeply and guiltily satisfying "I'm sorry I'm breaking our pact, but I really didn't know what else to do"

"It’s fine" he replied immediately "I mean, it's not fine that you're doing this, but... I think it's understandable."

"The worst thing is that it's not even a good cigarette" you sighed bitterly and then you finally turned your gaze to see him. He hated seeing you like this "What were you doing here anyway?"

“I couldn't sleep and I thought I'd get some air” he explained to you. Spencer didn't want to talk about himself that night, but he wanted to know in depth the nature of your state and make sure that you would be okay. "But you, what will you do?"

“Break up with him, that's a given. I honestly don't even want to ask for an explanation because I don't want to hear lies. The only thing that worries me is where I will sleep for the next few months when I take my things out of our apartment”

"Stay with me" the words came out without thinking and with such certainty, that they forced you to look at him immediately "I don't have much space, but I can sleep on the couch and you stay in the bed"

"I was thinking of asking Garcia" upon hearing this his cheeks turned red, because although you were good friends it was obvious that you would prefer to stay with a woman "But you are very sweet to offer it, Spence. I would love to sleep on your couch."

"In bed. I would take the couch” he clarified and for the first time that night, you smiled. It wasn't a smile that reached the corner of your eyes, but at least it was something.

Spencer wanted to reach out to take the cigarette from you, but he knew he had to at least give you the pleasure of that slip. While he looked at you out of the corner of his eye, he thought that you looked beautiful in profile and although he would never admit it, the smoke gave you a certain interesting touch that highlighted your qualities, as well as inevitably drawing attention to your lips, which were slightly dry at that moment.

"And you know what hurts me? That I keep wondering what I did wrong. Maybe it's that I spend too much time at work or I just… I don't know, maybe I wasn't good enough anymore."

“Don't say that,” he demanded, sounding almost annoyed. “Men cheat almost half as often as women, and their motives are usually sexually selfish. You have irregular hours at work, so what? A person who truly loved you wouldn't do that just because he can't see you as often. The problem is him because he's an idiot who doesn't know how to value you and honestly, I didn't expect less from him, because this just shows that he's a shitty person who feels like he can do that with women just because. So I don't want you to blame yourself for that, you are not the problem. And if you do then I'll rattle off every stat I know of that contradicts you. And I know a lot of them."

"Sure you do" you half laughed, at the accusing finger of your friend. He had spoken too fast and the curse words he said amused you, since it was not very common to hear the correct and kind Dr. Reid express himself like that.

The fire in your hand was dying out and with some regret you took what you knew was the last drag on your cigarette, enjoying it more than the rest, knowing that you might not do it again for a long time. He looked at you carefully and then picked up the end to deposit it in one of the containers that were around.

“I don't know what I can do for you. But if there's something that makes you feel better, you know you can ask for it, right?" he offered cautiously. Although he knew the facts, he had never had to comfort a friend in a situation of this nature, so he didn’t want to say or do the wrong thing.

"Another cigarette?" you asked hopefully, but his serious face told you that this wasn’t a possibility.

"Be honest with me, was that the first one or had you smoked during these days?"

“The first and will be the last. I swear" you replied, while with your finger you drew a cross over your heart. You knew that his insistence was only to keep you well and deep down you were very grateful to him "Do you know what else would make me feel better now?"

"What?"

"A hug" you confessed in a whisper.

A second later Spencer had already closed the distance between you to press you against his warm body and your arms slipped under his cardigan. You felt the soft fabric of his shirt caressing your cheek and that's when you started to cry. When he heard your first sob, he felt a tug in his chest and his head rested against yours, as if he was seeking to shelter you completely.

There was something in the man's hugs that made you feel safe and calm at the same time, as if they transmitted some kind of inexplicable peace to you. You knew that sometimes he wasn't a big fan of physical contact, however, he had never denied it to you. You continued to cry for a while and he didn't stop holding you for a second, both physically and emotionally.

"You should get some sleep" he whispered to you when he thought you were calmer, while he carefully rubbed the lower part of your back "Rest will help you feel better"

"I don't think I can do it"

"I'll stay with you," he offered. It was enough to speak in whispers so that you could hear him “If you want. I couldn't sleep before coming either."

"We're both screwed, huh, Reid?" you muttered ruefully and he chuckled.

"We are"

"But I'm still glad to have you," you said sincerely. You pulled away a little to see him and he let his hand go by itself to your cheek to wipe away all traces of tears with his thumb "You are a good friend"

The man's heart warmed at your words and he smiled tenderly as he gently stroked the side of your face.

"Things will be fine, I promise. You don't need that guy to be happy"

“Sometimes I wish I didn't love him, you know? I would like to be able to fall in love with someone good and kind, who is really worth it"

"You'll find them" he smiled genuinely "For now you'll have to settle for my company"

"You say that like it's a bad thing," you half laughed, your palms resting firmly on his waist, and then you were silent for a few seconds.

“Do you want to go back inside?" he suggested, seeing you yawn, and then you agreed. Crying had exhausted you and if he made good on his promise to stay in your room you'd probably drop out in a couple of minutes.

During the way you missed his warmth and as soon as you arrived you pulled him towards the bed to encourage him to sleep with you. It wasn't awkward or had an ulterior motive, it was just the two of you lying in the same bed.

"Reid?" you spoke in the dark

"Yeah?"

"Thanks for being here. I love you" you confessed. Spencer reached up to cover both of you with the sheet, then ventured in to place a hesitant kiss on your forehead.

"I love you too"

And with the feeling of those words firmly planted in your chest, you two finally fell asleep.

taglist: @navs-bhat @reidwritings @tricia-shifting14@spencerslove

#spencer reid #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid x reader #criminal minds #criminal minds fanfic #dr spencer reid #matthew gray gubler #aaron hotchner #derek morgan #jason gideon #JJ #penelope garcía #david rossi #emily prentiss #spencer reid x you #spencer reid hurt/comfort

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lottiebagley · 4 months

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'Tis the damn season- Sirius Black

If I wanted to know Who you were hanging with While I was gone, I would've asked you It's the kind of cold Fogs up windshield glass But I felt it when I passed you

She felt weird being there, an intense feeling of guilt. She hadn't meant to leave. Really, it was the last thing on her mind at first. But everything felt claustrophobic, like the walls were closing in on her. Things with Sirius were in a weird place and really she wasn't 100% sure how to handle it. Then, all of a sudden, she had this job offer. It was temporary, 6 months in New York and she needed something that felt new and alive and she wanted to be far away from Sirius. Now everything had changed because 5 years later and she still lived an ocean away.

Remus was a teacher now. Lily and James were married with a kid and trying for another. Marlene was thinking about filing for divorce.

They weren't kids anymore. They were in their mid 20's.

She was home for Christmas. She didn't have family in New York nor England, but as they had every year prior Lily and James demanded she spend the holiday at their place.

"God I'm so glad you're here!" Lily is squealing, arms flung around her friend in the busy airport. Little Harry, who's 4 now is clinging to his godmothers leg with gleeful giggles

"Hey Lils," She smiles, a soft smile, as she returns the hug. Leaning down to pick Harry up "How's my little trouble maker?" She questions, propping the dark haired boy on her hip as she grabs her suitcase, listening to the child's babble and responding when needed as her and Lily make their way to the Potter's car.

Harry is babbling excitedly from the backseat, about father christmas and presents and chocolate, as Lily attempts to join the stream of traffic leaving the car park

"James is so sorry he couldn't come with us to pick you up, he got called into work last minute," Lily apologises as they start the hour long drive back to her home.

"Prongs knows I don't mind Lils, and so do you. Just grateful to have somewhere to spend Christmas,"

"And you should know we would never let you spend it alone," Lily reminds, her friend smiling softly.

"I do know that," She reassures. It was true. She'd grown up next door the Potter family, so inevitably James was one of her best friends. When they both made Gryffindor they stuck together, as everyone who knew them expected. They had their little group which eventually adopted her dorm mates, Lily, Dorcas and Marlene after Lily and Severus stopped speaking.

It had been content, the war was fought and they survived.

The friendships survived too for the most part the only lingering awkwardness being the one shared by her and Sirius. They never dated, technically, but they were in love. Utterly deeply in love. They had been since they were 15 and though they never actually confessed it, never allowed their friendship to blossom into something more, they both knew it. Sirius was her first kiss, her first time. He took her to dances and picked her up from class and she painted his quidditch number on her cheek for each game and stroked his hair. It wasn't a relationship, but in all ways but labels it was, which led to inevitable drama. It was unsustainable but nothing changed, they both knew it was why she left.

"You can ask y'know," Lily comments, eyes ever so briefly flickering to glance at her friend knowing the thoughts in her mind.

"Don't think I wanna know the answer," She shrugs, glancing out of the window. "Is he gonna- y'know," She trails off embarrassed to admit seeing him again had been on the forefront of her mind.

"Yeah he's spending the holidays too," Lily confirms, watching as her friend nods and knowing better than to ask her what she's thinking.

"Is he..." She trails off not entirely awkwardly, Lily glances at her intense eyes and a knowing smirk "Does he. I- A date? Is he bringing someone of the holidays?" She lets the question spill out

"No," Lily informs simply, she doesn't offer anything else, changing the conversation quickly.

There's an ache in you Put there by the ache in me But if it's all the same to you It's the same to me

She'd known she was going to see him, with Lily's confirmation in her mind. She didn't know though, how she felt about it. Excited and nervous all at once, would he hate her? would he have moved on? Just because he wasn't bringing someone for the holidays didn't mean he didn't have someone.

She hadn't expected though, to see him quite so quickly. The car pulls into the drive and she knows immediately that he's there, motorbike tucked at the end of the drive way and the door is being pulled open by him. His hair is a little longer, though she hadn't seen him since last Christmas so she could have predicted that. He's clad in a warm looking jumper and some sweatpants, clearly cozy inside the comforting home.

"There's my little man!" He's cheering, wide grin, as he rushes to open a giggling Harry's car door, quickly fetching the child from his car seat and lifting him into a tight hug.

She wonders, briefly, if he was concentrating on not letting his eyes fall to her, or if maybe that magnetising need to look at each other wasn't there anymore. For him at least. She still can't imagine a view on earth she'd rather look at than that of Sirius Black.

"Thought you were coming tonight?" Lily questions, she's helping the girl with her bags but her eyes are watching Sirius, watching as he seems adamant on not looking at the girl who's staring at him so desperately Lily thinks she looks as if she could combust.

"Regulus' new girlfriend is a bore," Sirius shrugs, he knows he should greet her, that it's awkward not too, after all they are spending the next week in the same house. But he doesn't want to be the first to say something. He didn't leave. He didn't not return any calls.

"Hi Sirius," Her voice is timid and as much as he's glad to hear it, to see she's here, she's here and well and not got some boyfriend to spend her holidays with he hates it. Hates that she is reserved around him now.

"Hey, good flight?"

"Fine, crying baby but no turbulence,"

"That's good then, aside from the crying obviously," he feels like an idiot the second the words have left his mouth

"Yeah,"

"Cool," he wants to curse whoever has decided now would be a good time to remove every word he has ever known from his mind and leave him a boring, lifeless shell.

"What about you? How was Regulus?"

"Fine got a new girlfriend,"

"Heard she's a bore," The girl jokes and Sirius smiles, a real smile. Wondering, for a moment, when he last didn't have to force a smile.

It's then that Harry begins to whine, Lily swooping in to get him inside and get him a snack. The small moment effectively ruined.

So we could call it even You could call me "babe" for the weekend 'Tis the damn season, write this down I'm staying at my parents' house And the road not taken looks real good now And it always leads to you and my hometown

The house is cold, it hadn't been the whole evening, upstairs and tucked in the spare bed she hadn't been. James had insisted she take the guest room. He'd assured time and time again that Remus and Sirius didn't mind her having it. Remus was going to have a blow up bed in the office and Sirius was taking the couch. She had consistently tried to take either sleeping situation, feeling bad to be the one taking the bed. The offer was refused.

She's humming softly, some Christmas song that had been stuck in her head for days having heard it so many times recently. Her hands make light work of pouring milk into a pan, the lights in the kitchen set to dim.

"Let me guess, hot chocolate?" His voice is velvety, not at all laced with sleep. She wonders if he was laid awake too, thinking about how she was directly above him, so close yet impossibly far.

He had been.

"You know me too well," She agrees, voice soft. She doesn't turn around, feels almost embarrassed to be clad in reindeer print pj bottoms and some old jumper she'd had forever.

"You just haven't changed since we were eleven," He returns, leaning on the door frame.

"You want one?" She asks, moving towards the fridge to take out the milk once more.

"I got it," He announces. She nods, lets him cross the room to take out the milk, instead taking out another mug, and dumping 2 tablespoons of hot chocolate powder into it.

He arrives by her side, placing the milk down alongside a can of whipped cream.

"Pretty sure that's for Harry's special christmas eve hot chocolate, the one with a flake and marshmallows and smarties," She comments, her tone is soft, the adoration she has for the child evident.

"What he doesn't know won't hurt him," Sirius shrugs, he watches as she carefully adds more milk to the stove, "Just promise you won't tell on me yeah?"

"Your secret's safe with me," She confirms, she looks at him then. For the first time since he entered the room. He's already looking at her. With a look she can't read and so much intensity she wonders if anyone has ever looked at her like that before. He looks beautiful though, glowing in the soft lighting of the room.

"Y'know, I still do this every time I can't sleep," She informs him, eyes sincere and voice quiet, almost lost in the night.

He knows what she's trying to say. It had started when they were kids, he'd found her in the common room late at night on the second day of school. They'd spoken a little, but she'd stuck to James like glue, quiet when he wasn't by her side. She'd looked at him, wide glassy eyes. He'd asked what was wrong and she'd whispered to him about feeling like she was never going to belong in Gryffindor, not even at Hogwarts. He'd comforted her, wiped her tears away and helped her sneak to the kitchens, acting confident when in reality he'd never done it before either. He'd made the hot chocolate and she'd sat on a counter, he made her laugh and she suddenly felt like maybe everything would work out, like she might belong here after all.

It had become ritualistic for them. If one of them was sad they'd sneak to the kitchens and make hot chocolates and vent and cheer each other up.

Her first break up.

His bad fight with James.

Her dad passing.

His parents.

The war.

"I do too," He'd said quietly. Looking away now, almost like her words had hurt him even though it was the last thing she intended to do. "Milk's done," He adds, he wanted to leave the room, he was scared. Scared if he stood there, looking at her all domestic and cosy and glowing and beautiful, he wouldn't be able to resist the urge he'd been fighting since she climbed out of the car that morning.

I parked my car Right between the Methodist and the school that used to be ours The holidays linger like bad perfume You can run but only so far I escaped it too Remember how you watched me leave But if it's okay with you It's okay with me

Her legs are curled under lap, almost cat like in the large arm chair. Remus in next to her, sprawled across the sofa with the crossword of the day from some muggle paper in his hands.

She has one too, in her lap, though she's hardly looking.

"Ok, I'm at a wall. Trade me," Remus announces, leaning across to hand her the paper he had been working on

"Huh?"

"Trade me?" He questions, eyebrows furrowing at her despondent face.

"Right," She nods, switching papers with him.

He looks at her crossword, hardly started and suddenly he feels bad.

"You okay?" He asks, he glances out of the window she's clearly looking out of. Sirius is out there, leather jacket and a loose scarf. He's laughing, head thrown back and eyes crinkled. Helping Harry, who Lily had bundled up extra tight, to build a snowman.

"Fine," She confirms, pulling her eyes away from Sirius to look at her friend.

"I can only imagine how hard this is for you," Remus says gently

"I'm okay," She shrugs. Remus nods, not sure what to say. It felt like a theme recently. In the 24 hours she'd been there Lily, James and Remus had all struggled. Not sure what to say to either of their friends. They clearly missed each other, clearly pined for each other. Yet, neither of them was doing anything about it, neither of them even wanted to talk about it.

"You know he never wanted kids," She speaks quietly, head motioning outside. "It was weird. I always thought he'd be a great dad. Still, think he would. I just- I guess I got it. His parents were-well, y'know- and I understood him not wanting to repeat that, thinking he'd be like him, his dad I mean. He wouldn't though. He'd have been a good dad. Still could be I guess,"

"I think so too," Remus confirms, eyes traveling to watch his friend as he helps Harry to roll a head for his snowman.

"I get that he was scared, just think it's a shame," She comments. She turns back to her crossword, to Remus' familiar scrawl. She'd said too much, she didn't want to put anyone in the middle of things.

"You're wrong," Remus speaks, still watching Sirius

"How so?"

"He wanted kids. He talked about it a bit," Remus explains, watching as she turns to look at him face contort with confusion, "Said he wanted them after the war. A boy first, then a girl,"

"He'd be a good girl dad,"

"Didn't seem to care too much," Remus shrugs, "He just wanted a family. Everyone to be happy and healthy and safe. Said he wanted a daughter cause he thought she'd look like you,"

"Me?"

"Who else would he have had this fictitious family with?" Remus shrugs

"Sirius didn't want to settle down, we all knew that,"

"If you'd asked he would have done,"

"Remus-" She sighs

"You know I'm right. He'd have done anything you asked,"

"That's not fair, I wasn't even his girlfriend,"

"Sorry. I'm not trying to put anything on you. I'm just saying, he would have done anything you asked. Think he probably still would,"

"I asked him to be my boyfriend. He said no," She states simply. She'd asked too early, that's what Sirius had always said. To ask right before a war was starting, when their lives were so imminently in danger. The label would make something happening to either of them so much worse, it's what he'd said when he rejected her.

Remus wants to say that if she'd asked again, asked after the war, that Sirius would have said yes. That he'd have married her on the spot if it's what she'd wanted. That Sirius had told him that the day before she left. But Remus decides it's not fair to put that on her. She left and Sirius stayed and either one of them could have changed everything.

"Let's talk about something else," Remus decides.

We could call it even You could call me "babe" for the weekend 'Tis the damn season, write this down I'm staying at my parents' house And the road not taken looks real good now

Lily was stressed, that much was clear. Her hair was messy and Harry was whining on her hip. The kitchen a mess around her. James wasn't much better. Somewhere outside with Remus and Sirius, a desperate attempt to try and construct the goddamn gazebo.

"Lil, everything okay?" Her friends voice speaks from the doorway

"Oh hey, I didn't hear you get back," Lily speaks, her voice a little quick and eyes wide as she turns around, Harry starts to let out a whine and Lily's eyes screw shut.

Her friend is quick, reaching out to the toddler and distracting him quickly when she passes him his dinosaur toy from the kitchen counter. "What can I do?"

"Remind me to never listen to James and agree to host a stupid Christmas Eve party next year?" Lily questions, she's moving quickly back to the counter. Stirring the chocolate that's melting in a pan for dessert, momentarily abandoning the vegetables she had been cutting.

"Okay, and for right now?"

"I hate food cooked with magic, but this is hard and I have a thousand things to do and no time and-" Lily complains, eyes starting to turn glassy

"Lily, sweetheart, you are gonna be fine. Delegate okay? I chop a mean carrot,"

"No, you're a guest and-"

"Lil, what do you need?"

"Can you run to the supermarket?"

"Done," The girl nods, scribbling the list Lily recites onto an old envelope

"Take one of the boys with you, there's going to be a million bags," Lily instructs, pointing out her car keys as she turns back to her food prep "You're the best," She calls after her friend.

The silence in the car is awkward, they both hate it, because before all of this silence between them was never anything but comfortable. She has so much she wants to say and he does too, yet neither of them can even begin to find the words they would need.

"Got a lot to get?" Sirius questions from the passenger seat, fingers tapping anxiously at his thigh.

"There's a list in my bag," The girl answers, suddenly questioning if she'd come off blunt, she hadn't intended to.

"Can I?" He questions, head tilting to the tote bag on the back seat, unaware whether they were at an appropriate level to go rifling through each others bags.

"Sure," She agrees, he leans back, grabbing the bag and pulling it onto his lap.

He rifles through the bag for the list, trying to ignore the de ja vu the bag causes, her essentials the same as they were in her high school bag.

"You're a shit driver y'know?" he teases, looking up from the list when she takes a turn much too quickly, jolting him in his seat

"Maybe I had a really bad teacher," She shrugs in response, they both find their minds running to the summer Sirius had taught her to drive, her home opposite the Potter's allowing them to hang out every vacation.

"At some point you can't teach someone, trust me I tried,"

"You gave up,"

"Well at the time I was a glorified taxi service,"

"I'd say private chauffeur," She corrects, he smiles lightly

"I'm driving home,"

"Okay,"

Time flies Messy as the mud on your truck tires Now I'm missing your smile, hear me out We could just ride around And the road not taken looks real good now And it always leads to you and my hometown

The black dress sparkles a little in the light of the guest room, ending at her thighs and tight to her body she turns a little in the mirror, she was running a little late but it had taken forever to get her hair to fall right.

She thought maybe she'd dragged out getting ready a little too long. The party had started downstairs, there was so many people. People from school. People she didn't know, new friends and colleagues. Her friends, all of them. Yet it was daunting. She thinks maybe it was the thought of Sirius, Sirius all dressed up because she just knew he'd look perfect. Sirius flirting with some girl he'd invited, or one of James' colleagues or someone from school.

She'd been drinking wine as she got ready, something she'd done to ease her nerves but now she almost regretted. Feeling a little tipsy and overly emotional, the idea of watching Sirius with someone else left her feeling a white hot anger in her very soul. A feeling she knew was incredibly unjustified, yet she couldn't push it away.

It's why, as she walked into the decorated living room, bee lining to Marlene, who was squealing at the sight of her well missed friend, she was glad to see Sirius was in the corner of the room playing with Harry.

She spends hours catching up with friends, making polite chit chat with people from distant memories, smiling and exchanging pleasantries with strangers. She allows some guy from Lily's work to flirt with her but doesn't give anything back.

She watches Sirius from afar. He looks beautiful, so utterly beautiful. He's dressed in a white shirt that's tight around his form, the top few buttons undone and his blazer abandoned somewhere.

He spends as much of his night as he possibly can with Harry, staying with the kid until he's tucking the sleeping boy into his bed. Partly because he firmly believes Lily and James deserve a night off, partly because it's the perfect alibi.

After that Sirius tries to float, doing little jobs to help things run smoothly and using a plethora of excuses to excuse himself from conversations. He feels rude, particularly to a girl from school who he is sure is nervous to approach him. He isn't rude. But he thinks maybe it comes off that way.

He's not sure is it's just that it hurts to see her so okay, head back laughing with her friends. Or maybe it's just how drained he's felt all day.

He grabs a bottle of champagne and his blazer, sneaking outside and to sitting on the floor round the side of the house. Out of sight from any windows. He digs through his blazer pocket for a packet of cigarettes and a lighter, a habit he's been trying to drop but honestly was struggling with.

Its 5 minutes of silence before he is the slight click of heels on the floor. He holds his breath, hoping to not be found. She rounds the corner and he exhales. Feeling less drained just at the sight of her.

"Got a light?" She questions, Sirius nods and watches as she crosses towards him, cigarette in one hand and glass of champagne in the other. She holds the cigarette out to him and he lights it for her. "Mind if I sit? Or I can go smoke in the back garden and we can both pretend the other person isn't out here?"

"Sit," He says simply, she nods, sitting next to him on the cold ground, Remus had shovelled snow all afternoon. "Since when did you smoke?"

"Since 2 years ago, I had some project due at work and I was crazy stressed. Some guy I work with offered me one and I accepted. Stupid looking back," She informs simply.

"It's bad for you,"

"I've been telling you that since we were 17," She reminds

"Been trying to quit," He admits, watching her as she stares at him. Her eyes are slightly hazy, he can see she's drank a little too much but she's holding herself together gracefully.

"That's good. I have too,"

"Good," He nods, he watches as she inhales and exhales and sips her champagne.

"Why are you out here?"

"It was too much in there," Sirius admits, she nods in quiet understanding

"I get that,"

"You always did. Get me," He sighs, almost wishfully

"I guess so,"

"Do you regret leaving?" He asks. He thinks maybe he shouldn't. That come morning maybe he'll regret it. But there's something about the way she looks in the moonlight. The way she's been looking at him since she came outside, and how it's the same way she's always looked at him.

"I'm really proud of my career. I wouldn't have it if I had stayed," She's careful in her words, he can see her thinking about them before she speaks

"Right." He nods, her words in his mind are a polite rejection.

Sleep in half the day Just for old times' sake I won't ask you to wait If you don't ask me to stay

"Merry Christmas!" James' voice is loud as he enters the guest bedroom, flipping the light on without a care in the world

"I hate you," She states simply, they grew up together and James really was the closest thing she had to a brother. He smirks watching as she uses the thick sage green bedding to cover her eyes from the light.

"I know. Haz wants you to come downstairs so we can do gifts,"

"What time is it?"

"6. He's been up since 4," James informs, she pulls the duvet down from her face to see him leaning in the door way

"Fine," She agrees stretching a little before clambering from the bed. The matching Christmas pjs Lily had purchased for everyone bunched up a little.

"Hey, you doing okay? With Sirius I mean," James' voice drops low as he asks, eyes scanning the landing behind him briefly

"I'm fine," She can tell from the look on his face he doesn't believe her "Promise,"

"Mooney said he saw you guys sneaking back into the house last night. At the party," she hates the way his voice sounds hopeful

"We were both having a smoke James. It's nothing,"

"Thought you were quitting,"

"You sound like your mother,"

"Harsh! Go downstairs already woman," James teases, his tone light as he shoves her playfully on her way past him.

Lily makes mimosas and the group of friends share easy laughs as the day passes by, gifts exchanged and Harry smothered with love and attention. She decides it's the easiest day, people are distracted enough in the festivities the Potters have planned to not spend the whole day worrying about her and Sirius.

Without eyes on them they both find it easier to talk, they share whispered jokes and his dizzying beauty seems softer when he's smiling at her as they peel veg together.

"Lil I'm serious, go play with James and Harry. We can handle veg duty," She's determined in the way she gently pushes the girl through the archway into the kitchen.

"Thankyou sweetie," Lily is beaming, looking between her friend and Sirius's back knowingly before shooting her friend a knowing wink. "Rem, come with!" She calls as she retreats to the living room. Remus does as told, but not before giving Sirius a pointed look, one that screams 'SAY SOMETHING'.

"I've got the potatoes if you've got the carrots," Sirius offers

"Sounds good," She confirms, fluffy socks pattering on the floor as she takes her place beside him at the oak counter.

"When are you flying back to New York?"

"The 28th, I promised Mitch I'd be back in time for his birthday stroke crazy new years party,"

"That's fun," Sirius is lying. Nothing about what she just said is fun. It's the opposite. He has three more days before she's an ocean away all over again. She's rushing home, not staying for new years like she has every other year for some guy.

That's the least fun of all, Mitch. Who the fuck is Mitch? Sirius is racking his memories, in all the awkward Christmases they'd shared since she left she's never once mentioned a Mitch.

She sees the question in his eyes but doesn't say anything else. She's about to, truly she is, until the song playing through the small radio changes.

"Oh my god it's my favourite Christmas song!" She's beaming, dropping the carrot and knife she's holding and rushing to turn the music up.

He smiles gently, watching as she begins to dance around the kitchen. Red tartan pyjamas and the knit jumper Remus gifted her, he can't stop his mind from running to all the summer holidays they'd make breakfast together in the Potter's kitchen and she'd dance around.

"God, you still can't dance," He teases, gentle smile

"Shut up and dance with me!" She demands, she stretching an arm out to him and fuck he wishes he knew how to say no to her.

They jump around and sing along, hands linked together as he twirls her around the room, hearts beaming and flooding the room with laughter.

The song ends and she's breathless, chest to chest, so close to each other.

"Mitch?" He can't help the question, not when he's so close to her, not when it's taking everything in him not to lean down and kiss her

"He's gay."

"Oh,"

"There's no one else for me," She says it quietly, hands dropping his and looking down to her feet, almost embarrassed to admit it

His hand shoots up, cupping her cheek gently and forcing her to look at him

"Me either," He reassures, voice smooth and soft.

So I'll go back to LA And the so-called friends who'll write books about me if I ever make it And wonder about the only soul who can tell which smiles I'm faking And the heart I know I'm breaking is my own To leave the warmest bed I've ever known

James Potter can make a kick-ass espresso martini. It wasn't new information, he always made cocktails in the evening on Christmas. The rest of the inner friend group (the other girls from the dorm at school) and their spouses would come over, they would play stupid games and listen to the music they grew up on and the parents would take it in turns to check on Neville and Harry who by this point would be sound asleep in Harry's space themed bedroom.

Lily had gawped with wide eyes when she'd chosen the seat next to Sirius at Christmas dinner. Remus almost choked on his carrot when Sirius had ever so casually wrapped his arm around her at the table and she had leaned into his touch Marlene had been shooting her friend knowing looks all night, eyebrows raised in question at the way she'd been perched on the arm of his arm chair the whole night.

Nothing had happened. Not really. But something in the air had changed, something in the way he was looking at her was different, the longing glances had lost their sadness.

The night ends slowly, Marlene and Dorcas wander out into the night. Alice heads to where James had pulled out the sofa bed in the office. Lily leaves having checked on the kids one last time.

She's the next to head to bed, acutely aware of the sound of Sirius behind her on the stairs even though he's been sleeping downstairs the whole trip.

"What are you doing up here?" She whispers the question in the hallway as Sirius arrives on the landing.

"I wanted to say night," He whispers back, he looks too pretty. The warm lighting from the downstairs light makes him almost glow and he has a drunken grin on his face. She's no better, her eyes glassy from one too many of those damned martinis.

"You said night downstairs," She counters, he rolls his eyes fond gentle smile as he tucks her hair behind her ear.

"I'm glad you're here,"

"Me too," She confirms it quietly "Look forward to getting to see you, talk to you all year." He doesn't know if the light blush on her cheeks is from the alcohol or the whispered confession.

"Doesn't have to just be at Christmas y'know? You could call, visit even. I really miss you," He isn't shy in his confession. He'd scream it from the rooftops if it meant she might be a part of his life again for more than just the holidays.

"Sirius," Her voice is soft, he's too close. He is so close and she feels overwhelmed by him, drunk on his scent and using all her self control to keep her hands out of his hair.

"I mean it, darling. Truly," His hand reaches out, firm against her chin. "Hey, look," He speaks, face close enough she feels his breath on her face. She follows his eyes, looking up to see a sprig of mistletoe above them.

James does it every year, enchants mistletoe to sprout above two people in love. Mainly, he does it so he can kiss Lily and remind her to stop being so stressed about hosting and actually enjoy the holidays. Partly, he did it in the hopes it might help his two friends find their way back to each other.

"Can I?" Sirius's question is full of nerves, scared he's pushing her too far

"Always,"

It's gentle and timid, the way he pushes his lips to hers. It's safe at first, a peck. Neither wants the other to freak and run.

He's the one to push it further, though that isn't really surprise.

He pulls her ever closer, chest to chest and his big arms wrap around her, holding her to him. He kisses her like he's desperate, scared if he stops he'll loose her all over again.

She feels like she can breathe properly for the first time in years. Feels a weight off her shoulders as she allows her hands to tangle into his hair, a craving she'd had every time she looked at him. She lets him man handle her towards the door to the guest room.

His tongue pushing into her mouth as he holds her against the wall by the door. One of her hands stays tangled in his hair as the other moves down to hold onto the warm skin of his hip, fingertips slipping under his maroon sweater.

His hand travels down, landing on her bum with a firm squeeze and the motion seems to bring her back to her senses a little. She pulls away, though Sirius is quick to chase her kiss swollen lips with his own. She giggles in response, one last chaste peck to his lips before she looks him in the eyes, blown out a little with lust and creased from his bright grin.

"Sirius," She sighs out, he smirks head falling to allow himself to press a trails of kisses down her jaw and onto her neck

"Darling," he murmurs against her skin

"This is a really bad idea," Her point seems a little futile as she moves her head to the side to allow him more space to press his kisses

"Tell me you want me to stop. Say the word and I'll go back downstairs and you can go to sleep and we can wake up and pretend none of this happened,"

We could call it even Even though I'm leaving And I'll be yours for the weekend 'Tis the damn season

He doesn't think he's ever seen a sight so beautiful. She's laid next to him, body lit by the pale moonlight casting through the window. Her skin is bare and flushed and she fits against his body as perfectly as she always has.

Her leg is strewn over his naked torso, her head resting on his chest, hand reaching up to comb her fingers through his hair.

His arm that wraps around her lands on her back, thumb pressing comforting circles into her back.

"You're so perfect," He speaks into the quiet. She tilts her head up on his shoulder, allowing him to see her beaming face

"Sirius, you are the most beautiful person I've ever known," Her tone is impossibly soft, as his heart in that moment. The sincerity in her voice makes his whole body feel warm.

He feels too overwhelmed by the sickly sweet love in his chest to come up with much of a response, instead he presses his lips to her forehead an action so full over love and comfort it almost hurts her chest.

"I'm gonna hate having to miss you again," She says softly, her settling back into his chest as he squeezes her closer

"Only ever a phone call away," He hums hand moving to toy with the ends of her hair

"You could visit?" She suggests, scared he'll laugh at the thought though she has no reason to be

"Anything, if you want me to do it I will," His promise makes her grin widely, she leans up to press a gentle kiss to his lips.

The quiet takes over once more, both basking in having the other in there arms again, a feeling they'd been craving in the years of absence.

"I'm sorry I left," She whispers, she'd wanted to say it a thousand times, truly she had.

"I'm sorry I didn't come after you," He pauses for a beat, he thinks maybe the question is too big, what he's asking of her too much. His eyebrows furrowing as he thinks, deep pout on his lips.

"What are you thinking about?" She questions, thumb gently smoothing out the lines in his frown

"Stay," He says it quietly, so quiet she almost misses it. "Please, I need you to stay,"

We could call it even You could call me "babe" for the weekend 'Tis the damn season, write this down I'm staying at my parents' house And the road not taken looks real good now

She hadn't technically said no. She hadn't said anything really.

She'd felt like an idiot, sitting up in the bed to better at Sirius. Blinking as her mind raced, what if she did stay? what would she be staying for? would he finally be ready to commit to her or was he asking her to give up the career she worked so hard for to be around when he wanted a casual fuck?

"Say something," He hated how much his own voice sounded like it was begging, he hated the look in her eyes. The guilt. She was going to say no. He was certain of that as he looked at her.

"Say anything," He doesn't mean to sound angry. Doesn't mean to make her feel bad.

She's left, blinking as she desperately tries to gather her thoughts. He gets out of bed.

His movements around the rooms are sharp and hurried, tugging his clothes back on.

"Sirius," She says, she needs him to look at her. Needs him to stop for a second, to talk to her.

"No," His hands tug his jumper over his head as he moves towards the door

"Stop. Sirius, please just wait," She clambering out of the bed to follow him, grabbing her pyjama pants and pulling them up quickly as she reaches for the large knit sweater. She's following him down the stairs of the silent house.

He slams the front door in her face before she has the chance to follow him out into the snow. She hears the revving of his motorbike before the engine kicks in, hears the way it fades away as he races into the night.

She feels like an idiot. Feels pathetic as she sinks to the ground, back pressed to the front door. She had vowed a long time ago to stop crying over Sirius Black yet she can't stop herself.

"What's going on?" Remus is calling. Woken up by the sound of the slamming door. She wipes at her tears, desperate to hide them from him but the second he sees her and sends her a soft smile she's blubbering all over again.

"He left. He fucking just left," She's hiccuping through her crying, and he joins her on the old wooden floor.

"What happened?" He asks gently, a comforting hand squeezes at her knee.

"We slept together,"

"Ok, ok and then he just left?"

"No. He asked me to stay and I- I froze Rem. I sat there like an idiot and didn't say anything. He just- I needed to think and he wouldn't give me fucking second,"

"What would you have said?"

"I don't know what he wants. If he wanted to try like really try I would have said yes,"

"He needs to know that,"

Time flies Messy as the mud on your truck tires Now I'm missing your smile, hear me out We could just ride around And the road not taken looks real good now

She hadn't been to his apartment before. Remus had apparated her there and waited with her in a comfortable silence until he'd arrived. Sat on the curb outside, her head on his shoulder. Knowing he was home Remus left, she was safe on the busy London street, Sirius wouldn't let any harm come to her despite the deep sigh he lets out at the sight of her.

"I wanna be alone,"

"Too bad. I need to talk to you," She demands, arms crossed in front of her.

"We can talk later,"

"No Sirius. You don't get to say all that shit to me and then just leave,"

"Fine. come on,"

He leads her in an awkward silence up into the building, refusing to look at her in the short elevator ride to the 8th floor.

His apartment is very him, it's cosy and homely and smells like the Gryffindor common room.

He drops onto the sofa in the living room, she's too busy eyeing the framed photos on the wall, heart melting a little at the photo of the two of them, both in school uniform sat by the black lake her head on his shoulder his arms holding her close to him. Matching bright grins staring back at her.

"You wanted to talk," He reminds, embarrassed that even after rejecting him she's seeing his framed photo of her.

" The other day, at the party You asked me if I regret leaving? I lied. No I didn't lie. I just- I didn't tell you the truth. I regret it, every fucking day I regret it, I lay awake every night thinking about what we could have been if I'd stuck around,"

"It's a little late for that," he grumbles, arms folded and a stoic look on his face

"Could you just listen to me?" She snaps, "I've been in love with you since I was 14 Sirius and you have never ever wanted a relationship,"

"That's not true," He protests

"Oh. So you just didn't want one with me?" She feels like an idiot, standing in front of him. Their friends were wrong, she was wrong.

He hates the hurt in her voice, the tears in her eyes.

He's on his feet now, passing over the burgundy rug to grab her hand in his

"That's not what I mean. I just- I was scared, scared if you were mine and something happened. I couldn't have lived through that,"

"You never told me that, you always just said you weren't a boyfriend guy,"

"I could be. For you I could be,"

"Why did you leave?" She questions, desperate to know why he couldn't have given her just a few minutes to work things out

"I couldn't hear you tell me that you don't love me enough to stay,"

"I would never say that,"

"No?" He questions timidly, his eyes searching her desperately

"No," She shakes her head "If I stay this can't be what it was. I'm giving up my life here. We are older now and we are safe and this has to be real,"

"It's always been real to me. I'm in love with you, been in loved with you since second year and I will be until the day I die. So sweetheart, please, please be mine? for real this time,"

"It'll always be you Sirius," She promises, his lips kiss her and she feels herself fall in love with him all over again.

And it always leads to you and my hometown It always leads to you and my hometown

#harry potter fanfiction #sirius #sirius black x reader #sirius black #harry potter #sirius orion black #sirius x reader

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artoatsblog · 4 months

Text

What your favorite Nick toon says about you but it's EVERY Nick toon

Doug- When you were asked what you wanted for Christmas, you said "plan white bread."

Rugrats- You're a "90's kid" who wants the modern cartoon enjoyers to get off your lawn.

Hey Arnold-Same as Rugrats, but 5 time worse.

Rugrats (2021)- You only said this one to piss off the above two.

Ren & Stimpy- You're a gay man and all you OCs are ugly men who you need to kiss each other or else you'll die (This isn't an insult, you're the strongest member of our society.)

Rocko's modern life- You relate to at least one character way more than you would like to admit to others.

CatDog- Weird furry.

The angry beavers- Weird furry with taste.

Aaahh!!! Real monsters- You like the idea of Tim Burton's movies but your too cool to actually enjoy them, also your probably non-binary.

Kablam- As a kid you wanted to make something with this exact energy and now, you're a youtuber.

Oh Yeah! Cartoons- same as Kablam but you really miss Cosmo's old voice.

The wild Thornberry's- You worship the ground Tim Curry's walks on SO BAD.

Rocket power- Honest 90's kid.

SpongeBob SquarePants seasons 1-4- You're annoying about seasons 5+.

SpongeBob SquarePants seasons 5+- You know better than me about those people being annoying about seasons 5+.

As told by ginger- You were going to say Hey Arnold, but you didn't want to be lumped in with certain other people.

Action league now- You made at least five short films that look exactly like this.

Chalkzone- Your playlist for working out has the theme song for this show looped for five hours and nothing else.

The fairly oddparents- Your trans, and you hate no other person more than Elmer Hartman.

Invader Zim- You were a vary emo kid/teenager in the late 2000's (same, no shade)

Jimmy Neutron- you're really glad that that you picked the show in "Jimmy Timmy power hour" that wasn't made by an asshole.

All grown up- Come on guys "As told by ginger" is right there.

Avatar: the last airbender- I don't want to hear the lore of the fantasy book you wrote.

Avatar: the legend of Korra- Same as atla but You also made a LOT of shipping fanfics.

My life as a teenage robot- Transfem.

The X's- You don't exist, if you're going to go into the comments and say this is your favorite Nicktoon, you're lying.

El Tigre- This is just the good version of Danny Phantom.

Danny Phantom- That was a Joke don't yell at me.

Mr. meaty- You want this odd but cool type of puppetry to come back (if you thought I was going to make fun of this one your wrong.)

Tak and the power of Juju- Your enjoyment of this show is based entirely on the fact that you liked the games.

Back at the barnyard- Shitposter.

Fanboy and Chum Chum- Shitposter but awesome.

Catscratch- Yeah, I think Wayne Knight's voice is hot too.

The mighty B- Gay.

The penguins of Madagascar- I don't have a joke for this one I just think you have impactable taste.

Planet Sheen- You always wanted Jimmy Neutron to have more "Rawr XD" swag.

T.U.F.F puppy- You ether are Jerry Trainor, or you have a Jerry Trainor stan account.

Kung fu panda: legends of awesomeness- You have a three-hour lore video on this franchise, and I hope it does well.

Winx club- You wanted to help them get free from Netflix.

Robot and Monster- It may just be me, but I think you might enjoy Dan vs.

Teenage mutant ninja turtles (2012)- You don't like rise of the tmnt.

Rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles- You don't like tmnt (2012).

Sanjay and Craig- You used to freak other kids out with your scabs.

Monsters vs aliens- You can deny Coverton's rizz (sorry).

Breadwinners- Your about to go into every cartoon reviewers house with a shit ton of water balloons.

Harvey Beaks- In the middle/late 2000's you were more of a cartoon network kid, you loved Cowder.

Pig, Goat, Banana, Cricket- Same as Harvey Beaks but with Flapjack instead of Cowder.

Bunsen is a beast- Your Elmer Hartman.

Welcome to the Wayne- You wrote at least one fanfic for the ending of this show.

The adventures of kid danger- We don't talk about this one.

Middle school Moguls- it's ok monster high is about to come to Nick for real.

The loud house- Your ether a sapphic girl or a straight guy with a DeviantArt account who needs to be punished.

The Casagrandes- Same as the loud house but with the added advantages, because if you have a DeviantArt account in this one you're more likely to have a normal relationship with your family.

It's pony- You don't hate the British as much as the rest of us.

Middlemost post- John trabbic III is such a bad ass name though, wait this show has Del the funky homosapien and Tony Hawk as guest stars, I might need to which this.

Star trek: prodigy- You really like Netflix original animated shows don't you.

Big Nate- You haven't read the books.

Monster high- You the perfect in-between of goth and prep.

Transformers: earthspark- Why does this show have better non-binary rep than most other shows...I mean they are called Transformers for a reason.

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sainzfilm · 1 year

Note

HII !! i love reading your works sm and was hoping i could request an instagram au of carlos and actor!reader <33

pairing: carlos sainz x actress!reader

a/n: anon…..you’re reading my mind, me having that dream and being a carlos girl. ANYWAYS i will simply pass away and also thank you, my lovely :)

⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅∙∘☽༓☾∘∙•⋅⋅⋅•⋅⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅

and, action! - carlos sainz

instagram edit

Liked by charles_leclerc, pierregasly, and 637,373 others

carlossainz55 novio duties. stay tuned for mi amor’s newest series coming up next month 😊❤️

view all 413,849 comments

landonorris such a simp for Y/N. wishing her success in her new series!

charles_leclerc i second the motion. the s in sainz stands for simp

yourusername HEEEEY you know i wasn’t ready in that photo 😠 te amoooo, my carlos 🖤

carlossainz55 ay, don’t be silly. you looked beautiful in that picture

sainzupdates carlos is literally out here setting the standards for every man ever

sai55lovebot you mean he’s the only man EVER

Liked by ajcook, lilymhe, and 635,314 others

yourusername today’s highlights 🌟

1. my carlos driving me to set today. feeling like the luckiest girl in the world 🍀🌎

2. carlos taking a picture of me with my show’s advertisement in time square!!! unbelievable :)

3. got the chance to be a cameraman for today, the technical aspects of film are so fun!!

4. guess the secret’s out. stay tuned 02.17.23 😉

view all 247,139 comments

carlossainz55 amor, its the other way around, im the lucky one. i’ll drive you to set any time, always proud of you ❤️

yourusername i looooove you a lot lot lot. thank you for spending your off season with me 🥰

ynupdates OH MY GOOOOD YOU’RE STARRING IN BIRDS OF PREY

ynlovebot SHE’S CLIMBING STRAIGHT TO THE TOP 🌟🌟

charlottesiine congrats on the upcoming film, Y/N!! proud of you ❤️

yourusername miss you so much, cha!!! love you

Liked by charlottesiine, lilymhe, and 429,817 others

yourusername novia duties! glad to be at the paddock to see a podium finish for mi amor. proud of you always ❤️

view all 193,481 comments

sainzupdates best couple ever, being so supportive with each other’s careers 😭

ynupdates tell me about it!!! need them to stay together forever 🥺

ellahunt missing you on set already!! cant wait to see you next week

yourusername I MISS YOU TOOOO :( excited to goof around with you again 😜

carlossainz55 te amo, cariño ❤️ wish you could be here every race weekend, i love coming home to your arms

yourusername i hate you, you’re making me cry over here 😠 finish up media duties pleaseeee, i wanna have some pizza with you

charles_leclerc i’ve never seen carlos run out of the pen so fast.

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whirlpool-blogs · 11 months

Text

Matthew Tkachuk Daddy Issues primer

1) https://floridahockeynow.com/keith-tkachuk-rips-the-florida-panthers-calls-them-a-soft-team/

“This is do-or-die for the Panthers right now,’’ Keith told First Up with Korolnek & Colaiacovo. “I watched them the other night and I know I am staying at Brady’s house and Brady’s team played really well. They have some jam and, you know, I am a little disappointed with the Panthers.

“They are a soft team and they are getting everything they deserve right now.” To continue on that point, Keith Tkachuk said for the Panthers to snap their losing streak in Toronto, they need to bring a little more toughness to their game.

“Instead of trying to get autographs on the ice from Matthews and Marner,” he said, “they probably should check them a little harder. Whatever it is, it is disappointing. I know I sound like a frustrated person, but I know every time I come and watch Ottawa, they may not be the most talented team but they’re going to play hard. Perhaps Florida could take a page out of their book.”

2) https://www.sportsnet.ca/nhl/article/senators-brady-wins-tkachuk-battle-bettman-hints-lebreton-flats-a-little-small/

There was a “Brady is Better” chant at a game when the two brothers played each other, and Keith was at that game. Some speculate that Keith started it.

3) https://www.bladeofsteel.com/Keith-Tkachuk-explains-why-he-would-not-throw-his-hat-for-his-son-hat-trick-goal-126638

Keith refusing to throw his hat for Matthew’s hat trick, even when Taryn and Brady were also at that game.

4) https://theathletic.com/351173/2018/05/13/in-the-tkachuk-family-its-chantal-who-is-the-captain-of-the-house/

[On the family chalkboard in the kitchen] “It’s always like, ‘Happy birthday’ or ‘Welcome home, Brady!’ or ‘Can’t wait for you to leave, Matthew,’” said a chuckling Keith Tkachuk.

xxx

[A little insight into Matthew being the intense one and Brady being easier to get along with]

It’s an interesting snapshot because Matthew, a fiery competitor who was twice suspended by the NHL last season, is smiling, while Brady, a happy-go-lucky personality, is scowling.

“This picture is great because now it’s the opposite,” Keith said.

“That’s so true, so true,” Chantal said.

xxx

Chantal reads everything about her boys, too, noting that she is a subscriber to The Athletic.

“I like it,” she said.

“Except when they gave Brady a bad draft rating,” Keith said.

xxx

Keith then reminded his kids, “You guys better get your butts to the store and get some cards for your mom.”

“Actually, Matthew bought me a Mother’s Day gift this year,” she said.

“He had to have gotten you something that benefited him,” Keith responded. “What did he buy you, like eight beers or something?”

“No, Lululemon shoes,” Chantal answered. “He’s a great gift giver now that he has his own money.”

“It’s the least I could do,” Matthew said.

5) https://theathletic.com/229963/2018/02/02/he-has-that-face-you-just-want-to-punch-matthew-tkachuk-isnt-about-to-change-the-way-he-plays/

“He has that face you just want to punch, according to other players,” said his father Keith.

“I’m sure if I played against him, I’d go after him, too.”

“This kid, I find a lot of flaws in his game because I’m his dad, and that’s what dads do.”

“I love the fact that he plays with an edge,” said Dad. “I told him that I’d rather see him sit out a game for being too aggressive than sit out a game because he’s soft.”

6) https://www.bardown.com/brady-matthew-tkachuk-s-parents-explain-why-they-re-happy-their-kids-aren-t-in-the-same-conference-1.1121784

Chantal, by the way, told me she is happy Matthew and Brady are not in the same conference. Keith said: “I’m glad too. I don’t trust Matthew.”

7) https://theathletic.com/1984477/2020/08/10/its-distinctly-matthew-tkachuks-postseason-presence-drawing-rave-reviews/

“Keith wanted Matthew’s coaches to push him as hard they could. He would tell me, ‘You can be more demanding,'” said Granato. “It’s delicate because, as a coach, you have to consider how hard you can push a guy. And you love the guys you can push harder. Those are the guys you fall in love with as a coach. With Matthew? There was no limit.”

8) https://www.sportsnet.ca/nhl/article/tkachuk-brothers-vibrant-personalities-stem-from-colourful-st-louis-roots/

Keith said he remembered watching Matthew on the After Hours segment on Hockey Night in Canada as a rookie, conducting the whole interview with his head down.

“I said, ‘What are you doing? Get your head up and talk,’” said Keith.

“But now it’s like this (as he snaps his fingers).

“I watched Matthew interviewed last night and he was pretty good. He adds some normal stuff to it that people like. It’s not about the same answers. He does a good job.”

9) https://theathletic.com/4503016/2023/05/10/matthew-tkachuk-florida-panthers-nhl-playoffs/

From his father, Keith Tkachuk, he learned to accept responsibility: "You didn't win? Play better."

10) https://www.tumblr.com/matthewtkafuck/190505229656?source=share

Keith: “Matthew’s in love, but with himself.”

11) https://www.tumblr.com/raliegh/680996428961726464/lettucemakar-matthew-daddy-issues-tkachuk?source=share

Q: "What sort of text message do you think you'll get after getting five points against the team your dad works for?"

MT: "Um, I'm not sure, I'm sure he would have, I don't know maybe I'm putting words in his mouth--I'm not even going to say it, what I was about to--but he probably wanted it to be an OT game but for us to play well. Um, I don't know who he wanted to win the OT game but uh, no he, he, it doesn't matter what team he works for but he's obviously my [and] my brother's biggest fan and great mentor and obviously not only him but my linemates and teammates know how much I want to win against those guys, hometown team lots of people watching, same as, we got a lot of guys from Toronto, its like when we go to Toronto we want to win that game for the guys that are from there, tons of people watching so, I don't know exactly what he'll text me. Maybe he went to bed early and I won't even get a text I don't know."

#Matthew Tkachuk #keith tkachuk #Disclaimer: I do not claim to have any deep insights into actual!Matthew or actual!Keith’s relationship. Consider this a reference for quote #Feel free to interpret these quotes however you wish #post

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notyour-valentine · 2 years

Text

The Boy in the Window 25 ~ Tommy Shelby X Reader (Series)

[Masterlist] [Series Masterlist]

Chapter Summary: (Y/N)'s stay at the sanatorium renders a lot of new experiences and truths, not just for her but for all of them.

Notes: It seems this story didn't want to let me go, so it is a long one. I do not consent to my work being translated, copied or posted elsewhere on this platform or any other.

Warning: Canon conforming mention of violence. Illness. (18/21+). Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Expect spoilers for Peaky Blinders Season 1-4.

Wordcount: 7419

Part 25

[Previously]

There was something innately calming about the sound of the waves.

Again and again they brushed against the shore with the steadiness of a calming heart that had been beating since the beginning of time.

People came and went, even countries and kingdoms did, but the sea just kept coming.

Despite all her reluctance, (Y/N) was glad she had come here.

She now knew why poets and painters could spend hours staring at the infinite horizon. When the sun set, it was the most beautiful sight she had ever seen, turning the entire horizon golden red.

The air was different too. If she had thought Arrow House an improvement from Birmingham, this was another sphere.

In truth, she hadn’t believed it would actually come to pass, not until they actually stepped onto the boat that would carry them away.

And then there was no return.

Dr. Wood had been rather broad with his offers.

They, and especially their costs, had seemed impossibly daunting to her as all she could think of were the household budget she had calculated her life on for the last seven years, but Tommy dismissed it all immediately.

“We don’t care about how much it costs.”

She would have argued vehemently against it, because she cared a lot, but for him money wasn’t even worth discussing.

Tommy had shot down Margate as soon as it was mentioned, and even Torbay was not up to his standards.

Since the summer was coming to a close, he feared it might be too cold on the English coast for some of the very lengthy and rather daunting list of treatments, most of which she couldn’t even pretend to understand.

But that only left foreign offers which were equally frightening as they were expensive.

She had tried to argue for England once more, but Tommy had presented an immovable case for a different location, which had startled her into stunned silence.

She would have thought no man that had ever been to France would ever look favourably about the country again. Not Tommy, apparently.

That had left them with another problem.

She thought his pick had given her a way out, after all, travelling with two small children was one thing, but doing so in a foreign country was a whole other thing entirely.

And she wouldn’t have a way of communicating with the doctors and nurses and other people there. Neither she, nor Frances or Lisa spoke a word of French.

His “Well I do.”, had disarmed her completely, but he had only shrugged off her disbelief. “At least that way you won’t have anyone talking behind your back.”

And now here she was, staring out into the Mediterranean sea.

When he had said that money was irrelevant, she should have been warned.

Even on the boat she had a bedroom larger than any room in her old house in Small Heath, with every comfort afforded to them.

There even was a proper dining room with white tablecloths and silver cutlery for them to use, although nothing baffled her more than the fact that they thought it a good idea to have them use real glasses on a boat.

Emma and Charlie weren't the only children travelling in first class but apparently the only ones most other passengers had seen eat at the same table as their parents, but there was no way she'd let them out of her sight on a boat- not for a single moment.

Unlike Charlie, Emma shared her sentiment, and hardly ever let go of either her or Tommy for more than a minute.

And Lord help them if anyone even thought of leaving her visual radius for some undisclosed location-

They were all glad to have dry land under them once more, but for varying reasons.

The place Tommy had chosen made her want to cut and run immediately.

Yes, it was a sanitarium, with a whole army of doctors and nurses standing by and even a few professors.

But at the same time it was like one of those luxury hotels with the red carpets and balconies in front of the entrance- or at least she imagined them to be.

After all, which hospital had butlers and footmen? Had chandeliers in the dining room? Black tie dinners, a concert hall and a casino on the grounds for entertainment and already prepared accomodation for lady's maids and valets?

But it still was a medical facility, and so on the first day she had a thorough examination, after they had spent the first night in the villa- yes, villa- on the grounds of the sanatorium which was just for their use only and had housed many a titled guest before them, although catered to by chefs and waited on by servants to the point where Emma tugged at the arm of the man waiting at the door, asking him rather bluntly if he didn't have anything better to do than just stare at the opposite wall.

Not only did they provide food and service, (Y/N) was also met with an entire closet of robes, gowns and bath clothes, but throughout their stay she hadn't touched those.

She had fought tooth and nail but Tommy had insisted on sorting them all out with an appropriate wardrobe and it was far easier, she found, to accept these things if they were given by him and not some stranger.

A great many things were easier with Tommy around. He was also with her for the examination, not only as a translator, but also as a guardian.

She hated it, hated being fussed over, being treated like a fragile little thing or a child, despised the way they were only ever so kind and ever so forthcoming it seemed a little bit dishonest, or it would have done if she didn’t know that Tommy held his hand (and his money) over her, over them all.

The fact that there were no other children to be seen anywhere, and that they, as two unmarried people were given leave to practically live together without even an eyebrow raised told her one thing above all else: they had been grounded by a lot of money.

On the second day, after a schedule of treatments was worked out, he introduced her to an English speaking nurse called Clèmence, that would have been paid a lot of money to attend her exclusively and work as a translator while he kept the children entertained throughout the day.

Despite taking on that task, he still made sure to check in on her whenever he could, let alone question her thoroughly once they joined paths, as well as thoroughly reading through all her medical reports while conversing with the doctors and the nurses daily.

She didn’t miss how he always tipped the lower workers until their eyes shone, and she wasn’t as foolish to think he was merely paying for carrying bags, holding doors or rubbing her feet.

Apparently one could buy not just information but loyalty too, it seemed, as he left nothing to chance.

It wouldn't surprise her if some worker kept a secret log of the times she had coughed to hand in to Tommy at the end of the day.

Every time she saw yet another bill slip from his fingers, her chest tightened.

None of this came cheap, in fact, she knew it would cost him a small fortune, and that was just the money, and not the fact that he was here with her, because she had been too afraid to go at it alone.

So it was in guilt that she bit her tongue and let them do whatever they wanted, whatever he encouraged.

They put her in salt baths, or in others were there steam rose until her hair got all frizzy. They rubbed oils and creams on her chest and back before placing warmed stones on it. They rubbed her hands and feet (although she had no idea how that would help her lungs) and had her inhale all sorts of greenery until her eyes burned and her nose ran, which according to them was a good sign as it meant “It is loosening the infection, Madame.”

She did not feel very much like a Madame, nor did the idea of it loosening the infection seem as preferable to her when she was blowing her nose at near by-minute pace.

They didn’t stop there, no, there were scented bandages, massages, and even some ghastly little pool of water that only ever reached below her knee and was freezing cold which they made her walk through no matter how much she shivered - for her circulation, apparently, and encouraged her to spend time walking by the sea (an activity Tommy and the children greatly approved of, which made it a lot less tedious).

To her own surprise she caught herself that even Cyril would have enjoyed this.

She would have - could have complained, but in truth, she could see it working.

In a way, bit by bit, day by day, all the warm baths and steaming sessions had melted a weight off of her shoulders, had freed her from the invisible rope around her chest and calmed her racing mind.

For the first time in forever, she found herself sleeping through the night and waking up with energy instead of exhaustion.

It was a strange thing to experience, one she could not put into words.

But she missed the children, even if she had them before breakfast and after tea.

She was with nurses and doctors, while they were out there somewhere with Tommy, having a proper holiday.

It was restlessness more than anything that drove Tommy out of the confinements of the sanatorium with the children.

The first few days he had spent at the beach, ever the perfectionist, until both children could swim to his satisfaction, returning them with wide smiles, dry hands, sun kissed skin and the sweetest kind of exhaustion after an entire day in the waves.

Then, once they were sufficiently proficient, he took them out on a boat one day, exploring the smaller caves at the coastline, just out of view.

“There were so many crabs, Mummy!”

“Hundreds and hundreds!”

On the days where they weren’t in the water, they collected sea shells and on the next, drove holes in them with heated needles and made a string.

The day after that, they returned form having been fishing with some bounty that Tommy refused to hand over to the cook and instead insisted on grilling themselves.

He even taught them how to remove the bones in one bit.

(Y/N) mashed the fish up all the same with her fork to make sure neither Emma or Charlie would even risk swallowing a bone.

Sometimes he’d take them further away from the sea, like the time they went grape picking or the time Emma returned to her saying that they had ridden a donkey and Charlie assuring her that his father had said perhaps they’d get one too.

Every day, for them, was a new adventure with Tommy’s guidance, and while it made her heart swell more than she would have thought possible it did hurt that she wasn’t a part of all these memories they were creating.

She had thought Tommy would get bored, eventually, but it seemed to be the opposite. He sometimes told her of his plans before hand, the things he wanted to do, the places he wanted to take them, what he wanted them to know and learn.

All these things, she soon realised, where things he had learned on the road, experiences shaped by his own childhood and in passing them on, he seemed younger than his years, and day by day she saw more of the boy next door in him, even if it was only in flashes, and only ever when it was the four of them.

“It was a proper castle, Mummy, not a palace!”, Emma insisted over dinner, her food not nearly as interesting as the story she could tell her.

“Because castles are for battle.”, Charlie said. “They’ve got bigger walls and a drawbridge and teeny-tiny slots from where they’d shoot the arrows out of!”

“And - and there were armour a long long time ago there were real knights there, with swords and horses!”

The story about the tourneys had captured both their imagination incredibly and dominated the dinner conversation for almost it’s entirety.

“That sounds like quite the wonderful day you’ve had.”, she admitted, before nodding to the two unfinished plates of food. They had to eat before it got cold entirely.

They had not even considered the black tie dining room for more than a moment, as there stiffness and silence ruled.

And in what world would they prefer that to Emma and Charlie’s excited chatter?

“I’m quite jealous.”

Tommy shrugged slightly.

“If you’re good we might take you with us on our next trip.”, he quipped, watching her from across the table.

“I am being good!”, (Y/N) insisted. “I’ve done everything they’ve said and let them do everything they’ve wanted.”

“Didn’t do the salt cave.”, he muttered under his breath, tapping the ashes of his cigarette into his ashtray.

“Well that’s different!”, (Y/N) argued. “There’s no point in that!”

His eyebrow shot up.

“It’s only worked for hundreds of years.”

She glared at him and huffed.

“Tommy - it’s ridiculous. I just can’t imagine that there is any use in me sitting in a salt cave.”

“What’s a salt cave?”, Charlie wanted to know.

“It’s a cave made from salt.”, Tommy said.

Charlie stared at him for a moment, but then his narrowed eyes glanced at the table salt, squinting suspiciously.

“That salt?”, he asked.

Tommy nodded.

“But that’s soft! You can’t make walls that soft!”

“Apparently they are.”, (Y/N) said. “A whole cave filled with salt and they want to dump me in the middle of it.”

To make her point, she took the little silver salt spoon and shoved it right in the centre of the bowl, where it remained standing.

Emma and Charlie stared at the tiny spoon for a second, before she looked up as she grinned.

“Like they do with the fish at the shops?”

“Yes.”, (Y/N) agreed with a chuckle. “Mummy’ll be just like a pickled herring by the end of it.”

Both children laughed, but Tommy didn’t think it was funny in the slightest.

“The salt makes the air different and that’s good for the lungs.”

Another pastime of his, while the children were sleeping, was ploughing through medical works and research.

“So me sniffing salt would have the same effect?”, she joked, but Tommy only threw her a dark glare - until his face suddenly softened.

He leaned over, a glint in his eyes.

“How about you do the salt cave and then we’ll all go on a little trip.”

(Y/N) hummed, trying to control her facial reaction.

She didn’t see the point, and the process of spending the better part of an hour stuck in a literal cave was far from appealing, but at the same time she burned to see something else rather than the sanatorium and the waves, even if it was just for a day.

“Can we go to the salt cave too?”, Charlie wanted to know, twisting the silver spoon.

“I suppose so.”, Tommy said with a shrug.

It looked, well, it didn't really look like anything, or at least not like something she had ever seen before.

The front part had the appearance of a hotel lobby, with a large desk and a waiting area. Of course, if one was travelling with Tommy Shelby a waiting area was not necessary.

They had been expecting them.

"Right through there.", Tommy translated as a man dressed all in white, accompanied by two women, and guided them further into the earth and away from the sunlight.

"You don't have to come.", She assured Tommy, watching his eyes glance back to the exit.

"Someone has to watch the children.", He mumbled, staring at his feet.

The lanterns reflected on the white walls, which were void of any natural light source, giving the entire corridor an unnatural golden glow.

There was another room, where (Y/N) was asked to take her hat off so that she could be more comfortable.

Then they were led through to the cave.

It was a strange place to be in.

The walls, of course, weren't smooth or polished but entirely covered in rough, glittering salt.

There was something otherworldly about this place, about the way the air smelled, and the lights flickered.

It was beautiful but in an unnerving sort of way, like some parallel place in a fairy tale world where humans like them had no place.

"Oh Mummy!", Emma gasped, her eyes wide and round as plates as she tried to take everything in at once.

The same awe was written all over Charlie's face as his hand found hers.

They had to move around some salt pillars to reach the loungers that had been prepared for them.

Four of them were ready, although both children would be able to fit on one easily and she doubted Tommy's would see use any time soon.

"They want you to sit down and take off your shoes.", He translated.

"Emma and Charlie too?", She asked, looking around at the children.

Charlie was running his fingers over the wall, feeling the textures while Emma was taking a more direct approach.

Her head snapped around when she heard Emma gag and cry out, seeing her jumping on the spot up and down, her face torn in agony.

"Mummy- it's really all salt!", she wailed

Stretching out her tongue she clawed at it with her fingers.

"Emma!", She gasped, deserting her place and running over to her daughter who was still gagging and coughing.

One minute she wasn't looking and her daughter had to go and lick the wall of the age old cave.

Her eyes swam with tears and she feared she would throw up all over the sparkling white salt.

While she rubbed her back, Tommy was barking orders.

It was strange hearing a language that was spoken in a brighter, more melodic voice by all those other people around her being twisted around his rough way of speaking.

A moment later they returned with a glass of water.

"Rinse your mouth!", She instructed, guiding the glass to her lips.

"Like when we're brushing teeth - good girl."

Emma pulled a face and began jumping up and down as now the taste of saltwater instead of just salt filled her mouth.

She hadn't thought of that and with nothing for her to spit into, (Y/N) told her to spit it into her hands.

A moment later, Tommy crouched down next to her with a bowl for the water Emma had spat out and a towel for her to dry her hands with.

It took three more rinses for the salt to get off of Emma's tongue and even then she was weepy.

"Well I don't really know what to tell you, my darling,", (Y/N) confessed, stroking her cheek. "What else did you expect?"

Emma pouted and leaned into her.

"Here.", Tommy muttered, digging in his pocket and pulling out a few caramel candies.

"This should help."

"Can I get one too?", Charlie asked.

"Course you do, my boy.", Tommy said, handing it to him.

Emma unwrapped it and handed Tommy the paper unceremoniously, who made it disappear in his pocket.

"Right, are we all good now?", He asked.

Only then did (Y/N) glance at the three other people in the cave who had been watching all this mayhem unfold.

It made her cheeks burn as she quickly averted her eyes.

Best get on with it now.

Once they were sat on the loungers, the nurses began to wrap a scarf around her shoulders a few times, covering her all the way up to her neck, before helping her lie down. Then they took the blanket and wrapped her legs in it tightly until she felt rather idiotic.

One blanket each was enough to wrap Charlie and Emma up, who giggled.

"We look like caterpillars!", Charlie giggled, wiggling around.

"None of that,", (Y/N) warned, "I don't want you falling off."

Especially since none of you can use your hands.

Although there was some truth in Charlie's words.

She did feel like a caterpillar.

The recommended silence lasted a decent five minutes before the children got bored.

"I packed my bag,", (Y/N) announced over their squirms and complaints, "and in it I packed my favourite straw hat."

Emma took over immediately.

"I packed my bag and in it I packed my favourite straw hat and sweeties!"

Then it was Charlie's turn.

"I packed my bag and in it I packed my favourite straw hat, sweeties and the story book!"

And so round and round they went.

But as the game went on, she didn't miss Tommy becoming ever more restless.

He had refused to be bundled up like the rest of them, and was only sitting on the side of the lounder. Bit by bit his breathing had gone heavier, even if his eyes were locked on the floor.

Smoking wasn't allowed in here but he was twisting the silver case between his fingers, fighting the desire.

It took her longer than she would have thought to be able to free her arm, or at least her hand from their bindings.

"Your turn!", Charlie reminded her.

"My turn?", (Y/N) asked, slightly startled.

"I packed my bag and in it I packed my favourite straw hat, sweeties and the story book, cake, chocolate cake, hot chocolate, some tea, Duffie, Mrs Tatters, a blanket, Cyril, a horse, a blanket-"

She stared at Emma as her memory broke off.

For three seconds she tried to think, but her mind was blank. Then Emma giggled.

"You're out!", She announced.

"What did I forget?", (Y/N) asked, glancing at Tommy.

"I packed you, Mummy!", She giggled, before running down the list.

"I packed my favourite straw hat, sweeties and the story book, cake, chocolate cake, hot chocolate, some tea, Duffie, Mrs Tatters, a blanket, Cyril, a horse, Mummy, all of us and the fire rocks.", Emma concluded.

"Tommy?", She asked softly to get his attention while Charlie eas beginning his list.

While Emma ran through it as if taking a single breath would break the spell, he took his time.

Tommy's eyes snapped up immediately, and the shine in them startled her, but once he realised there was no threat, he exhaled softly and swallowed hard.

"C'mere.", She asked, shifting slightly on the lounger in a very inelegant and rather humiliating fashion, to make a bit of room.

Slowly, he approached her.

"Duffie, Mrs Tatters, a blanket, Cyril, a horse, Mummy, all of us and the fire rocks and a big fluffy pillow!", Charlie concluded, while Tommy sat down on the edge.

It dipped under his weight.

Slowly, she laced her hand with his, feeling the slight trembling that he had tried to hide by playing with the lighter or clenching them into fists.

"It's perfectly fine if you want to wait outside."

Although he inhaled sharply, he shook his head.

"'m staying.", He promised, giving her hand a little squeeze, and holding on just as tightly. But his eyes roamed around the closed ceiling.

He was silent, and apart for the shaking in his hands, completely still, but she knew there was a war waging in his head.

Bringing the children had been a bad idea, because otherwise he wouldn’t have had to be here.

So she tried a different approach.

With a sigh, she rolled her head to the side, glancing down at their handiwork.

"The things I do for you.", She told him with a cheery voice. “Look at me - all wrapped up like a pastry about to go into the oven.”

Tommy glanced down the length of her body and reached over to tuck one side in a little tighter on her other shoulder, pulling it up to her neck.

"You should rest - that’s what they said. Rest or sleep.”, he reminded her. “I'll make sure they're not licking any walls in the meantime.”

(Y/N) sighed in deep exasperation.

"That was certainly something for the memory books.", She mumbled, glancing at where Emma and Charlie were still packing imaginary bags.

The corner of Tommy's lip twitched in promise of a smile.

Then he stroked that strand of hair out of her face which had been irritating her slightly, but was impossible for her to remove due to the wrapping.

He let his hands linger on her cheek.

"Close your eyes, I’ll watch them.", He promised, trailing his thumb over her cheek while she did the same with her own on his knuckles.

“And who’ll watch you?”, she asked, although her eyelids were getting rather heavy.

All these morning swims they had her doing made her welcome the afternoon rests.

“Well,”, he said, “I can always wake you up eh?”

That didn’t sound all too believable to her, more like a trick to get her to close her eyes, but when he began stroking her cheek in that calm and steady rhythm, it grew more difficult to fight.

Up and down, he stroked, up and down. Up and down.

Until sleep claimed her.

Tommy kept his promise, although not before consulting with all the doctors and nurses amd Clémentine.

But once permission had been granted, he saw no reason to delay.

The South of France was populated by large villas, hotels, and country clubs, or at least that was what he had thought, but within just a sort drive away from the compound, Tommy took them to a different sort of place.

It was a small fishing village, with narrow roads that reminded her of home, only that Small Heath had never been so clean, and to her the light brown stone walls and the orange-reddish rooftops were beyond charming, especially since the city didn’t overwhelm her.

It wasn’t too large or too expensive or too strange.

It was a small city for small people that wouldn’t make her feel inconsequential.

He had chosen it well.

The size, scale and tranquillity of the city (and the fact that there were no cars allowed) allowed them to let the children run a little ahead, as long as they always waited at the corners.

While Tommy stuck to his usual dark suits, even if the Southern heat forced him to abandon the jacket, he had gotten the three of them appropriate summer wardrobes, which for her meant a good dozen white and pale dresses with wide brimmed hats she had tried to reject, but he would hear none of it.

Now, they kept her face in the shade, which was a relief, while the light fabric didn’t feel suffocating at all.

For little girls it meant smaller hats and pale dresses. She didn’t fail to notice that Emma often wore a different dress when they returned to the one she had set out in, undoubtedly making either Tommy or the poor washer women regret ever having put her in pale dresses, but now she looked like a little angel, with the white dress, straw woven hat, and matching white ribbons that were tied around it.

With Charlie it had been a little more difficult as the boys fashion was still all sailor's uniforms and there was no way Tommy would allow his son to walk around like a navy soldier.

So Charlie was dressed like a right little gentleman, with shorts of course, but a shirt and vest of his own, even if his jacket hung right next to his father’s over his right, while she held onto the left one.

He had offered her his hand to help with some rather dangerous looking cobblestones and after nearly walking the entire street the realisation dawned on her that neither she nor he had pulled back, and by then there was no point anymore.

They strolled around for a bit and entered the church, where she helped the children each light their candles, the way they always did, while Tommy watched.

A little later they had some refreshments in the shade of some jasmine trees, with Charlie and Emma sharing a slice of apple tart, and trying to compete for the amount of “Merci”s they could fit into the brief interaction with the waiter.

By the end of their short stop, they had the entire staff wrapped around their little finger and offered the children a sweet on their way out, while praising them being well behaved for “English Children” (according to Tommy’s translation).

Then they strolled down to the harbour, where vendors not only sold fish and seafood, but also their craftswork, sweets, honey and other produces.

“I should have brought a basket.”, she said as she saw all the little stalls.

“I can buy you a basket.”, Tommy offered, nodding towards a spot where someone was weaving their own.

“No thank you!”, she quickly said, but she smiled at him.

Since there were more people around here, both children needed to hold their hands again as they made their way down the line of little stalls.

Before long Emma proudly sported a bag of sweets which she had only received on the premise that she won’t have more than one until after lunch, while Charlie had begged for his father to buy him that one large seashell which made the sounds of the sea - “Really, Dad - listen!”

He wasn’t disappointed.

At the next stall, another thing caught Emma’s eye.

“How come they’re round and these aren't?”, she asked.

The man was selling pearls, and while a part of his stall sold them already set as earrings or necklaces or bracelets, another part showed them still unset, with even the possibility of picking out a bunch from bowls, those that were deemed imperfect.

One bowl was for the round pearls, the others for those in different shapes.

“Do you know how pearls are made, Emma?”, Tommy asked.

“They’re made?”, she asked suspiciously. “They’re not stones?”

He shook his head.

“Do you remember when we took the boat a few days ago, when we went to that tavern with the oar at the wall? Where we had mussels to eat?”

Her head snapped around at that.

“You two ate mussels?”, she asked them surprised.

“They’re a bit squishy.”, Charlie told her “and Dad had to get them out of the shells for us.”

Did he now?

“The shells are like the home of the mussles and sometimes a little bit of sand gets in and sand feels itchy, doesn't it? So to stop it from itching, the mussels put layers and layers and layers of softness and bit by bit it gets all smooth and pretty.”

He let Emma and Charlie both think on that until he continued.

“Depending on the sand and where it is in the mussel, the shape changes. That’s why every single pearl is unique and none is like the other. Even when you look at the necklaces, no two pearls are the same.”

To bring down his point, he held up one of the singular pearls and showed them a little niggle.

“So if anyone ever tries to sell you a string of pearls and they all look and feel exactly the same, you know they’re trying to cheat you. If it’s just perfect its not real.”

“Truly? Every single one?”, Emma asked.

“Go have a look at the strings.”

They set to work immediately, analysing every single one in regards to shape and colouring.

“Goodness,”, she said softly as he joined her. “I didn’t know that.”

“Now you do.”

“Think I should get one for her? A necklace or a bracelet?”, he asked after a while.

“For Emma?”, she asked.

He nodded, but she shook her head immediately.

“Don’t say it’s too expensive.”, he argued preemptively, “they’re far cheaper here than they are in England.”

“Well, it’s not just the price,”, she insisted under her breath. “Emma’s five. She’s far too young for precious jewellery. She’ll lose it put it on Mrs Duffie or her dolls or maybe even the pony.”

The thought made him smile just barely.

“We can’t give her pearls until she’s eighteen, or sixteen at the earliest. She’ll have to understand and know how to take care of it properly.”

At that moment, she was called away again as one pearl apparently looked a little bit like a muffin.

They continued to stroll through the market but Tommy trailed behind slightly, the jackets in one hand, and the bought goods in the other.

Later, when the children were running circles around an orange tree, she joked that they’d probably sleep until noon next morning, but all she got in response was a mumbled “Probably.”

The thought it was perhaps the heat or the exhaustion or even boredom. It bothered her, but she couldn’t ask with the children around.

They reached the sanatorium rather late, but by the time she had the children washed and ready, they had prepared some dinner which Tommy had turned down in favour of a walk.

So it was just her eating with them and putting them to bed.

Her prediction had been right and they fell asleep even before she had finished the first song.

(Y/N) sung it to the end nonetheless, before kissing each child and leaving their shared bedroom.

The jacket resting over the back of the chair told her, he must’ve returned and she saw him but a moment later, standing on the balcony and staring out at where the waves were coming in timeless certainty.

Again. And again. And again.

The stars reflected on the shiny surface in hundreds little silver dots. The only red one was that of his cigarette as he brought it to his lips again and again.

His sleeves were rolled up again and his other hand was shoved deeply into the pocket of his trousers.

“The children are sleeping.”, she told him.

For a few seconds there was just silence, with only a nod in recognition of her words.

When nothing more came, she swallowed.

“Alright,”, she sighed, “I’m going to bed too.”

She had only just turned, when he spoke again.

“Wait.”, he asked, flicking his cigarette off of the balcony as he spoke. “I need to talk to you.”

“Oh?”, she asked, as her heart began to thunder.

Tommy stepped back inside and sat down on the sofa, arms braced on his knees, and his fingers twisting.

The sight was long familiar and made her swallow hard.

But all she could do was sit down next to him and wait.

It took a while for him to gather his courage to speak.

“You know,”, he began, staring at his feet, “these last few days, when I was with the children, or even today when they mucked about with the waiters, they keep thinking-”

He cut himself off and shook his head, running a hand through his hair.

“Why did you say what you did at the pearl vendors?”, he demanded to know, changing his approach so quickly she had trouble following.

“What?”, she gasped.

“Why would you say that?”, he repeated, a little calmer this time but no less desperate.

She raked her brain for what she could have done wrong, or said to hurt him.

Emma and the pearls, she thought.

He had been trying to do something nice and she had shut him down.

“I’m sorry.”, she said quickly, “I didn’t mean any harm, I just thought she was a little too young to have pearls of her own.”

His jaw clenched.

“So that’s why you said it? When she’s sixteen - like a figure of speech?”

Now she was entirely lost, and she felt herself getting upset too.

“Well no. I said it because at sixteen she’ll be old enough to take care of pearls. I know you have the money but that doesn’t mean you should be wasteful and for me giving a pearl necklace to a child is wasteful!”

He shook his head vehemently and reached over to take her hands in his.

“No, no that’s not - that’s not what I’m saying. That’s not what I’m trying to say!”, he mumbled, holding onto her hands.

“Then what are you trying to say?”, she asked.

The silence hung between them like a wall, and only he could breach it.

For a moment she thought he wanted to pull his hand away, but he changed his mind and held hers tighter.

“It’s a long time until Emma’s sixteen.”, he finally said. “That’s over ten years, (Y/N).”

She stared at him, his ruffled hair, his shining eyes, the way he alternated between taking open mouthed breaths like he had just run a mile or clenched his jaw to the point she feared it would snap. Even his cheeks were flushed.

“I don’t understand.”, she admitted.

He swallowed hard once more.

“You said we can’t give her pearls until she’s sixteen.”

(Y/N) stared at him in disbelief.

She had said that, had said every word then just like she understood them now, but the eye opening meaning he sought to put in his words escaped her.

“What are you trying to tell me, Tommy?”, she asked.

He huffed impatiently and averted his eyes once more.

“I need to know if you just said that or if you meant it… if it really is something you want.”, he said.

Mean what?

But before she could speak up, he already continued, the muscle in his cheek twitching.

“Because it’s what I want.”, he whispered, so softly the night breeze might have drowned it out if she hadn’t been hanging onto his every word.

“Because I want to be around when she’s sixteen, and Charlie too.”, he confessed, and once he had started, he couldn’t seem to stop himself.

“I want to see them go to school and university and all that other stuff we didn’t get to. I want to see them grow up. I want to - I want to look out me office window and see them race their horse sup the drive way even though you told them not to. I want to meet the people who they will become. I want all of that, and everything along the way - the good, the bad, all of it.”

His eyes met hers and they shone with tears.

“I want to be there, (Y/N), do you understand?”

“Of course you do.”, she said softly, speaking up against the lump in her throat as she offered him a small smile.

“No!”, he argued, “not of course. Not of course!”

Tommy shook his head once more and shifted until he was facing towards her, even if he couldn’t meet her eyes.

“When I wake up,”, he whispered, “I think about them - about what we’ll do today, about if they’ll like it. I think about watching them play, and hearing them laugh. About what things I should teach them and wonder how quickly they pick up on all that, about watching you watching them.”

He took a shuddering breath.

“I wake up and I know I get to do all that a- and it makes me want to get up.”

Tommy drew trembling circles in the palm of her hand.

“It’s been a long time since I wanted to get up in the mornings.”

Now, finally, she understood, and her eyes began to burn.

He took a shaking breath.

“Since I did it because I had something to look forward to and not just because I had to or because everything will fall apart if I didn’t, but because I wanted to.”

Oh Tommy, she thought and wanted nothing more than to pull him into her arms and hold him, but he wasn’t finished, and she didn’t dare interrupt him, not now.

Wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, he gathered himself again, at least to the point where he could look at her again.

“So I need to know,”, he said, the voice of the businessman returning, “I need to know you’re alright with that, with me…with me being involved, me teaching her things, me holding her, because it is what I want, but I also know I’m not much good, (Y/N).”

He had to clear his throat before continuing. “Not nearly as good with her as you are with Charlie or in general and I’m not half the man her father was, but I want to be there. O-only if you don’t mind.”

“Why would I mind?”, (Y/N) asked, her hand reaching up to cup his cheek, but he pulled it away, returning it to her lap.

He wanted matters settled and settled properly with the same dedication he showed his other ventures.

“Because you know what I am- how I am.”, Tommy reminded her. “It’s not an easy life to live around me. And it won’t be the same as it would be with someone else.”

“I know.”

That was all she said and these two little words made his lip tremble again.

But he needed more, more confirmation, more certainty.

Tommy almost buckled over at her words, taking deep and calming breaths as he ran his hand through his hair again.

“Fuck,”, he mumbled - “that was harder to ask than I thought it would me.”

That made her smile.

“Why?”, she asked, stroking a strand of hair out of his face.

This time he let her.

“Because I was afraid you’d say no.”, he told her blankly.

“I need something, (Y/N), something to hold onto, to drown out the noise when it gets loud again - I need something to come home to and-”

He broke off and shook his head.

“I need a home. Charlie needs a home and for all this time it was just a fucking house that might as well have been a backroom in some inn. I need something to come home to, but I want it to be you.”

She had opened her mouth to respond but he cut her off before she could speak.

“You and me.”

“And them.”, she reminded him, nodding towards the door to the children’s bedroom.

He lifted his gaze and nodded and for the first time during their conversation she could spot some sense of calm wash over him, not enough to drown out the worries, fears and confessions he had held within him and placed in front of her, but enough to dilute them bit by bit.

“It’s not just that. I- I want it to be us again.”, he said, giving her hands a little squeeze. "I need you to know that but I understand that things have changed, I've done things too and - well. I understand if you prefer it to be a different way, the way it's now with us as friends or... or whatever this is now or anything else, I'm alright with that."

He broke off to let himself breathe.

"Being around them, being around you - that's all I want.", he whispered, "in any way you'd have me.. You don't have to decide nor or ever, just...just so you know."

He had been so honest with her, pouring out his heart, probably more than he would have thought he would at the beginning of their conversation.

It would be unfair if she just left it at mere acceptance, because acceptance wouldn’t be right, not nearly, to capture the relief nor the way her heart had threatened to burst out of her chest unable to handle all the emotions his words had caused to stir inside her, good and bad.

Besides, what if she wanted him to know?

“Tommy,”, she said softly, making his head turn back to her. “I want it to be us too.”

The End.

I would like to thank every single person who has read, liked, shared and commented on this story. While I had a rough idea of where I wanted to go, you all knowing or unknowing had a hand in the way this story and the characters in it developed! Without your encouragement, I never would have managed to finish a story, which in total has over 117 000 words. I had such fun creating these characters and their stories, the way I've always had with writing, but no one prepared me for the amount of fun it would be to see other people react to this story.

So I want to thank you all for letting me experience the story through your eyes!

All my love,

Val

P.S. These four were my companions all throughout this summer, so while we probably all need a little break from each other, it would be very rude not to pop in from time to time, even if its just for a oneshot or headcanon or something

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onyichii · 2 days

Text

This is a response to @cocogum post! Since it is SUPER LONG! Imma start doing this instead of reblogging if I have a lot to say.

OG Post by COCOGUM:

YES COCOGUM!! I am LOVING YOUR ENTIRE POST! I have a few thoughts to add...

A) I'm happy her hair is growing out too! I hope she eventually has hair as long as her mothers.

I want her to look like a forest goddess.

I think the growth is a symbol of just (as you said) being happy or at peace. In TV/movies people cut their hair as a symbol of change (freedom from the past) and grow it out again (sometimes) when they're at a new happy place. As we have seen, her hair and that green leaf she sports now are a symbol of her new found happiness.

B) I too was not expecting the "adult fun time" scene but i am hoping we get A TON more especially if this series is gonna be 100 chapters. I want more fluff, more hugs, more kisses, more f--ks! lol Put a baby (or three) in her Yugo! Give the Sadida kingdom an heir!

I can see where you are coming from that Yugo was having a wet dream. If that's the case, that is funny because he (presumably) had just pollinated his flower queen and he is dreaming of doing it again! 😀😀 And he called her tireless!? LMAO. Whether it was a dream or they were interrupted before the nut we can agree that they are BOTH hungry for each others touch/warmth (based on that scene alone).

I still think they were interrupted before they...made sap🌳and fell from the air.

I think the "adult fun time" positions you were suggesting are accurate and I can see Yugo switching too. I think it would depend on who initiates it. When she initiates she's top but when he initiates he'd top....sometimes (not all the time because as you said—he loves the view)! lol

C) For the open room. I think the construction of the floor (or level) gives them privacy. Like a long corridor before the room entrance. And at the entrance to the corridor there'd be a magical cotton bell (as seen in s3) that rings when pulled to let the royals know when servants want to enter. BUT if there is no magical door bell (OR ANYTHING) that is bold of them!! lol.

Rereading your post...if the doorway is open like that it makes me think of this quote (the last quote at 1:40) from the film Scary Movie (watch from 1:30 to 1:42 for context)

D) So I am GLAD people have been bringing up Draconiros. I am not deep into the WAKFU/KROZMOS/DOFUS universe and had NO IDEA who he was nor any of the other primordial dragons.

I got into Wakfu for Amalia. I thought she and Yugo would be cute from all the hugs she gave him. When they canonized a potential Yumalia (in the OVA) I STANNED for their star-crossed lover romance that could never be. I love the whole cast but Amalia's character design is so cute/fun (it drew me into Wakfu).

Anyway, I am curious if Draconiros is ALSO responsible for Nora's daydream in ep 4 of season 4. THIS SCENE ALWAYS THREW ME OFF!

I feel like this scene was added for two three purposes... 1) to introduce the audience to Efrim (in a foreshadowing way) 2) to add to what Oropo says in episode 1. Questioning Yugo's "good" intentions and actions which have caused (and WILL CAUSE) trouble for the World of Twelve. 3) To sneakily, introduce Draconiros (without the audience knowing).

The reason why I think this is Draconiros and NOT Efrim is because—how would Efrim know any of what was said in that scene? Efrim is in the Necroworld at this moment. He and Nora were in the Krozmos away from the World of Twelve for a long time. There is NO WAY Efrim would know about YUGO's effects on the World of Twelve. At none, that I can think of...

Which also brings to question, how did the Goddess Eliatrope know the Brotherhood of the Tofu and everyones names when they entered the temple? Did I miss something? I mean Quilby could have told them some things. From before his imprisonment...but I digress...

Anyway, I think Draconiros took on Efrims form/voice in s4. And now he is making an official appearance in the manga.

If they had shown Draconiros in season 4, it would be a loose end. And Tot wanted to wrap the animation up without any loose ends. So (to me) it'd make sense not to show Draconiros' true form at all in s4 and have him take on Efrims form/voice.

E) I think this dude is gonna be a problem. But I may be over thinking 🤷‍♀️. And shouldn't he be referring to her as QUEEN Amalia instead of LADY Amalia? Does he have some passive aggressive beef with her? Or is it okay to refer to a Queen as Lady instead. I feel like the Sadida's are more chill about titles (compared to other kingdoms) but...idk.

His character design (in this scene) is just giving...bad guy or pawn to me. If I am right, he could play a betrayal role (if the plot takes that turn). I do not see him being a fan of the Eliatropes either.

F) And I agree that the Sadida kingodm is tense with it's new residence. I'm glad you brought up the perspective from the Sadida but let's talk about it a little more with a Eliatrope in mind...

The Eliatrope have NEVER had to live with another race before. EVER. They had their OWN PLANET. No other race existed on there but them.

Thanks to Baltazar (in s2) they had been watching Yugo through the Eliacube, but have they been taking notes on the customs of the world around him?

Being on a new planet with so many races must be a SHOCK to them. ADDITIONALLY, they haven't interreacted with anyone but each other for goddess knows how long!!! So the communication, customs, cultures, and everything probably hit them like a TON OF BRICKS. I would assume that they don't (quite) understand what tolerance and acceptance of other cultures is thanks to their isolation too.

However, it is something they are gonna have to learn. Starting with the Sadida race.

Since they're teens I think (...well, I hope) it'll be easier for them to learn and integrate into the world of twelve via the Sadida Kingdom.

ALSO...It will take time for the Sadida's to be comfortable with the Eliatropes too. I mean...people have been trying to take their homeland (via possess the tree of life) for a long time. It's no surprise that they are weary/tense of some alien race residing on said homeland. They may know Yugo, but they don't know his people. They probably think they'll take over....IDK.

But I am here for the tea! 🫖🍵

FRIDAY NEEDS TO HURRY UP!!

#wakfu manga #wakfu webtoon #wakfu #wakfu yugo #wakfu amalia #yumalia #wakfu s4 #wakfu season 4 #amalia sheran sharm #yugo #yugo x amalia #yugo the eliatrope #kroz #krozmos #dofus

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mephinomaly · 9 months

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[TL] A Snake in one's Bosom/Ibara Saegusa 4*

Character(s): Ibara, Nagisa, Hiyori

Summary: After a recording, Nagisa suddenly and unexpectedly snaps at Ibara. Lost, Ibara asked Hiyori for help. After some shopping, Hiyori reveals what the reason was...

Season: Winter

Ibara: Thank you for your hard work today! As always, working with a jack-of-all-trades is a delight ☆

Today’s recording focused on adlibs and originally I was rather worried about it but now I know that was groundless apprehension.

The staff have prepared some ice cream. Is chocolate to your liking, Your Excellency?

Nagisa: …Ice cream? Thank you, Ibara. This is a reward for today.

(...!?)

Ibara: I look forward to continuing work with the same attitude tomorrow, Your Excellency, if you allow!

Nagisa: ...

Ibara: Is something the matter? You’re making a glum expression but perhaps that is me overthinking?

If that is the case, then please be as harsh as is needed in order for me to improve. If His Excellency so wishes, this Ibara Saegusa will do whatever it takes. Ha Ha Ha ☆

Nagisa: …So noisy. Shut up.

Ibara: Huh…!?

…Sorry? Y-Your Excellency? Why have you suddenly become angry? Did I do something in order to cause it?

If I did, please! Please tell me!?

Location: CosPro Office

Ibara: —And that’s basically it.

Hiyori: Ahaha. How amusing. Nagisa-kun threatened you and you got scared.

Ibara: This is not a laughing matter. His Excellency hasn’t spoken to me since then.

Hiyori: Oh yeah? Then, you came all this way in order to ask me about why Nagisa-kun got angry, hm?

Ibara: Yes, I did. Since today is his day off, I’d like to use this time to get to the root of the issue.

Hiyori: I don’t think you need to be so timid. He was probably already in a bad mood and you set him off.

Ibara: Perhaps, but I do not believe that something like that would be enough to upset him to that degree.

Hiyori: Fufu...

Ibara: What’s so funny? Seriously, this is no joking matter, Your Highness!

Hiyori: Nono it’s just- Ibara is far more impatient than I thought. It’s cute.

Ibara: I suppose I have to be cautious of topics that could potentially upset him despite not knowing what those could be.

Up until now, if His Excellency is angry, I am usually aware of the cause of it. However, this time, I am completely at a loss.

I cannot help with getting rid of whatever is upsetting him.

Therefore, I humbly request your assistance as someone who is the most knowledgeable about His Excellency!

Hiyori: …Wow, this is very honest and laudable for you, hm?

Ibara: If I continue to cause distress to His Excellency, future Eden and Adam activities may be at risk of failure.

Therefore I believe that the best course of action is to resolve this ASAP.

Hiyori: I see. I understand why you’re so desperate.

But of course, I know exactly why Nagisa-kun is angry. So coming to me was the correct thing to do.

Ibara: You’re a godsend! Then please—

Hiyori: However! Simply telling you why is boring, right? Since you’re asking me for a favour, I want you to show me how serious you are about this.

Ibara: How serious I’m being? How would you like me to show that? Would dogeza be sufficient?[1]

Hiyori: Fufu. You have to accompany me window shopping!

Location: Mall

Hiyori: I was able to get a bunch of different cute spring clothes. What good weather ♪

Ibara: I’m glad you are enjoying yourself, Your Highness. However, this is a rather extravagant way to spend one’s time.

Hiyori: Entertain me first before you start talking about extravagance.

I ask you what clothes you like and you give this model pre-generated answer. You know all the latest trends but it doesn’t matter because all you talk about is when it’ll go out of style.

Talking to you isn’t fun.

I try to teach you the joy of highbrow activities but you do nothing but work so I guess you’re unteachable.

Ibara: For me, work produces the same effects and results as your highbrow activities. Rest assured, Your Highness. Hahaha ☆

Anyhow, could you perhaps now tell me what was upsetting His Excellency?

Hiyori: Hm, fine then. I’m just killing time at this point and you’ve practically become my personal baggage carrier.

So you wanted to know why Nagisa-kun was in a bad mood right?

Fufu. So the reason that Nagisa-kun glared at you was—

Ibara: Yes...

Hiyori: He just has a cavity.

Ibara: …Pardon? He has… a cavity?

Hiyori: Well, to be exact it’s toothache. We don’t know if it’s a cavity yet.

Seems that he glared at you that day because he was eating the ice cream the staff provided and it caused him some pain.

But he knew that if he told you that, you’d confiscate it so he kept quiet and just made a face instead.

Ibara: …If that is the case, it was just a cavity that has been causing me all this grief?

Hiyori: Nagisa-kun’s using his day off to go to the dentist.

Look, I think he went to that dentist today. He’s probably about finished now…

Nagisa: …Hiyori-kun, you’ve come to pick me up.

…Oh? Ibara is here too? Why?

Hiyori: Sorry Nagisa-kun. Ibara was super worried that he had offended you so I ended up telling him about your tooth.

Nagisa: …Oh, I see. Sorry for causing you trouble, Hiyori-kun. Ibara too. My teeth are fine so please don’t worry.

Ibara: Yes?... Wonderful, that is excellent news. It is of the utmost importance that your teeth are in good health.

Nagisa: …Ibara. I’m sorry for before. I was too harsh on you.

Ibara: It’s fine. Now that I know the reason for you being upset, I feel relieved.

However, Your Excellency, I will apologise in advance for my rudeness.

But after today, you are banned from any and all desserts and sweets!

Nagisa: …Banning them isn’t necessary. It wasn’t a cavity, I just have hypersensitivity.

Ibara: It doesn’t matter! Whether a cavity or hypersensitivity, they both cause you pain!

Nagisa: …The dentist showed me the correct way to brush my teeth though. Therefore there isn’t a problem?

Ibara: No, I have already made my mind up. No matter what you say, I will not overturn it. My decision is final.

For the time being, I will be closely monitoring when you eat and when you brush your teeth!

I will even brush your teeth for you if it comes to it!

Nagisa: …You’re pushing your luck, Ibara. I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again - I am above you, you are below me—

Ibara: That threat will not work on me this time. The reason for this failure was mismanagement on my part!

I have allowed you too much freedom as of late. I will fix this.

Nagisa: …What should I do, Hiyori-kun. Ibara’s scarier than usual.

Hiyori: You two have swapped positions. Dealing with Ibara is such a bother, so run away with me, Nagisa-kun.

Ibara: You will not be. No more of this farce! This will not be happening again!

dogeza is where u kneel on the floor and put ur forehead to the ground in a bow. Google it for a reference. Mans prepared to beg on his hands n knees

#enstars #ensemble stars #translation #ibara saegusa #nagisa ran #hiyori tomoe #mephi's translations #unfortunately oissu n the html is broken #kicking and screaming

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nourrris · 27 days

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I'm happy there was no season 4.

This could either be a popular, or very unpopular opinion, I'm unsure as frankly I've only began watching two days ago, and finished the show already, (god it was beautiful).

Anyways, I very firmly believe anything after a season 3 would have likely ruined the storyline, it ended on such a beautiful note, something that's so perfectly them. I'm also in a way, happy they never actually did kiss, although realistically I had been rooting for it to happen, the fact it didn't doesn't bother me one bit, it really brings out all the intimacy in their prior actions, and words, I love that their love was batshit insane, that it didn't need a kiss or pda to believe it was reciprocated, frankly surrendering eachothers lives together was more than enough for a confirmation.

But continuing on, I believe a season 4 would have been too messy, they left s3 on a very difficult position to recover off, and a position that didn't need recovering either, it didn't need fixing or changing - not one bit. It was so perfect in my opinion, their last things they did was kill a man together to save one another, then kill themseleves together, literally how much more fitting could it have been for these murder husbands? It just worked so well, that nothing can be more intimate than death for them, in my opinion.

Latching onto the last part of the first section of the post, I really liked how they portrayed the reciprocity of Will's feelings towards Hannibal. When Bedelia ask's Will if he 'aches' for Hannibal too, and it cuts off to another scene, I generally already took that as a yes, as it was a big damn claim, I don't think it's something you easily hesitate on, not when the person in question is a cannibalistic murderer. When he chooses to save Hannibal, and jump off the cliff with him though, that is the real confirmation of course, choosing to leave his wife and son, all friends and absolutely every inch of the life he made - for Hannibal, a man he physically could not get over no matter how hard he tried.

It's perfect, sorry I just finished the show today (like a few hours ago) and I love it so dearly, I've never watched something where the ending felt so genuinely satisfying, even if it seemingly hadn't meant to felt like a finale in that manner, it worked amazingly, I'm very glad it wasn't a s2 situation with such an insane cliff hanger, or else I would have probably just.. never watched the show. Some say it does feel like a cliff hanger, but eventually you can come to terms and realize that their actions, a double suicide in the name of love(?) couldn't possibly surpass anything else they've done at that point, their action's have led them to either horribly idiotic situations, or blissful moments.

Lastly I wanted to mention my original assumption of the ending, I midway through season 2 found out Hannibal was actually a incomplete cancelled show, also prior to that I found through spoilers that will eventually has a wife. Those facts are important because I very weirdly am a person who cannot consume a media without spoilers, (my anxiety is due to that). So I just about know every ending of a show before I'm even halfway into it, although I tend to prefer to wait later, I wondered if finishing the show was worth it so i searched it up, and watched briefly the ending, It was very relieving as if it actually did truly end in a heterosexual way it would have immediately made me quit the show, as yes they are intimite but I still did want any type of closure, without it I would have felt at most pretty indifferent with the ending.

Anyways, the show is beautiful, I love it so so much, even if it's a complete change in genres for me, I love the characters, I love the artistry and creativity in the show, and god do I love the ending.

(edit a day later: guys i totally missed that last scene w bedelia at the end, i still prefer s3's ending but did not know it was implied they were alive!!??!)

#hannibal tv show #hannibal nbc #hannibal lecter #will graham #sorry if theres typos #tis 10:30am #ive been awake since 5pm #spent all day watching hannibal (whoops)

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sapphiccooper · 9 months

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10 Heartstopper Season 2 Things I Am Excited About

(comic spoilers ahead)

10. Truth or Dare.

The drama, the angst, the drama. The possible major turn of events. My theory is this scene will be very different from the comic, especially with Ben being confirmed on the trip.

9. The teachers.

Need I say more? As someone who didn’t have something like Heartstopper as a teenager, it’s good to see adult characters have similar experiences.

8. Nick and/or Charlie taking naps together.

It’s just so cute, like come on.

7. Tao loosing his mind over Elle.

Tao being all nervous around Elle at the realization he has feelings is so cute. I also love that he completely simps for her HARD. He thinks she’s the most amazing person ever, he’s her biggest fan, and she is his.

6. The angst of them trying to tell each other they love each other.

5. Charlie and Nellie moments.

Someone get this man a photo album.

4. Nick’s rugby coach coming out to him.

She slay.

3. Nick reuniting with his friends.

One of my favorite aspects of Heartstopper, is it’s emphasis on the importance of having a diverse range of relationships. Romantic and platonic relationships are so important. Expecting everything you need emotionally, physically, and mentally to come from one person isn’t possible or fair. Strengthening different relationships not only strengthens individuals, but also other relationships.

I would have put this one higher, but it may be more focused on in later season(s).

2. Nick and Tao’s growing friendship.

I love the relationship between Tao and Nick, and am excited for it to grow in season 2. Tao cares so much about his friends, and I know will start to realize how kind and genuine Nick is, while still holding his pride about being wrong.

1. Tara and Darcy’s story being more prominent.

Even though Tara and Darcy are side characters, their relationship is still one of the most known sapphic relationships on tv. To see them get more of a story this season is extremely exciting. I think their relationship struggles this season will be one extremely relatable to a lot of queer people, and I’m glad to be able to see them overcome it, and remain happy as queer couples deserve to be.

#heartstopper #heartstopper netflix #charlie spring #nick and charlie #heartstopper season 2 #nick nelson #tara jones #darcy olsson #tara and darcy #queer friendship #queer joy #queer cinema #queer #tao xu #elle argent #tao and elle

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starryevermore · 1 year

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to be loved by him ✧ tech

angst city™ library | send in a request (consult request faqs first)

request: Tech meeting a cute racing mechanic and 100% being smitten and stumbly and bumbly but when he races he's cool and calm and confident. They 100% make out in the pit stop after he wins - @captainsbestgal

pairing: tech x fem!mechanic!reader

summary: when tech comes to safa toma, you find yourself smitten. lucky for you, he feels the same.

word count: 2,085

warnings?: mild spoilers for season 2 episode 4 of the bad batch, fluff, making out, little bit of teasing, pet name (cyar’ika), not proofread

Working as a mechanic at Safa Toma Speedway was not the sort of work you always dreamed of you. Working as a mechanic? Sure. That had always been the plan. Machines made more sense than people, after all. There were only so many responses, so many actions, a machine could make. People, though? People…Well, they didn’t like you. They thought you were “too much”. They thought you talked too loudly. They thought you laughed too much. They thought you overbearing, annoying, exasperating, irritating. But machines? Machines didn’t think those things. Except for droids, of course, who were maddeningly opinionated. But that was why you didn’t often work with droids. Until now, of course. But these were extenuating circumstances.

When the Republic became the Empire, everything changed. Your home planet was no longer safe—or, at least, it wouldn’t be. You may not have liked people, but you knew enough to know to recognize patterns. And the way things were looking, you could already feel the cold, iron grip of tyranny squeezing your home. You took the first ship out of there, which, unfortunately, put you on Safa Toma.

Safa Toma wasn’t…a great place to be. It housed criminals, smugglers, gamblers, and the like. It wasn’t exactly the safe haven you were hoping for. You supposed it was your fault for not paying more attention when you bought your ticket. But, you were here now, and you made do.

You ended up being employed at the Safa Toma Speedway. It wasn’t the best work, but it paid well. All you had to do was make sure the droid racer, TAY-0, was working fine and that his speeder ran well. And, of course, aid him in modifying the speeder, since the speeder wasn’t designed for racing. You were grateful for the work, so you kept your head down about the seedier aspects of Riot Racing. Don’t kick a gift horse in the mouth, as they say.

And, oh, were you glad that you decided to stick around.

Cid, who often bet on TAY-0, had come to the track, alongside two…bodyguards? And a child. (Part of you wondered if the child was also a bodyguard. Though she didn’t look much older than ten or eleven, she looked like she packed a punch.) You more interested in the handsome, goggles-wearing bodyguard, though. If you weren’t busy working, you would have made a proposition or two. Though, you mused, you might just still have the opportunity.

The race had gone well, until it didn’t. The other racers destroyed the speeder. It crashed. In the wreckage was the broken bits of TAY-0. An unfortunate turn of events for Cid, who bet her freedom on TAY-0 winning. But then the child—Omega— but in, and raised the stakes. If TAY-0 won the next race, Cid was free.

Your hand was brushing against Tech’s—one of Cid’s maybe-bodyguards (you still weren't sure on the arrangement)—as you reached for a tool to repair TAY-0.

“Ope, sorry,” you said, pulling your hand away.

Tech passed you the tool you had been reaching for. “No need to apologize.”

You offered him a smile before turning back to your task of reconstructing TAY-0’s arm. Kriff, you felt like an idiot around him. Tech, you mean. Not TAY-0. (TAY-0 could kick rocks.) You usually had so much to say that people would tell you to shut up. But when you were around Tech, your mouth suddenly became dry. Your palms became clammy. You struggled to even figure out how to form a sentence. What the hell was he doing to you?

“So, uh,” he coughed, “how’d you end up working here?”

You stared at him. Was he trying to do small talk? Curious. He didn’t strike you as a small talk sort of person.

“If it’s too personal, you don’t have to say,” he rushed out. There was a pink tint to his face. “I thought it might be nice to talk. Fill the air, you know. We’re going to be here all night. Based on my calculations, we’ll be lucky to have everything repaired and in working order before the race begins tomorrow. And—”

You cracked a smile. His words died in his throat. It was endearing, how nervous he got around you. At least you weren’t alone in that camp. “The Empire,” you said. His brows shot up. You were quick to add, “Nothing happened. Nothing specific, I mean. But they took over my home planet, and I got a bad feeling about it. Decided to trust my instincts and booked the first ship outta there. Ended up here, which wasn’t much better.” You took a moment to look him over. “I think it was a good decision, though. I probably wouldn’t have met you if I ended up somewhere else.”

The pinkness in Tech’s face burned red. “Oh—I—uh—“

“What about you? How’d you end up working for Cid?”

Tech eyed you, hesitancy overtaking his demeanor. Had you overstepped a boundary? Had you said something that triggered bad memories? Oh, dear. That was the last thing you wanted to do.

Tech stared at you, unblinking. He didn’t blink very much at all, though. His wide eyes constantly took in his surroundings, calculating and categorizing all that he saw. It should have been unnerving, but it wasn’t. It was…comforting. You liked knowing he saw you. “I would rather talk about you,” he said finally. “How did you end up a mechanic?”

You pondered for a moment, tried to formulate a response. You didn’t want to make yourself sound like a fool. “Just what felt natural, you know? I was always good with my hands, always had a mind for puzzles. That’s all being a mechanic is, really. Figuring out the puzzle of the machine, determining what pieces you needed to fit together to make a cohesive picture.”

Tech nodded along as you spoke. “Is it not what you wanted to do?”

You frowned. “What do you mean?”

No one had ever asked you that before. When you told your parents of your chosen career, they shrugged with a quiet sort of indifference. Something about how mechanics are always needed, so you’d always have a job. That it made decent money, so you could have a good life. It was nothing of prestige, so it wasn’t something they got excited about. But it also wasn’t something outlandish, so they didn’t protest, either. Now that you thought about, perhaps your feelings were more similar to your parents’ than you once believed.

“You said being a mechanic felt natural, but there’s no emotions behind your words. Rather, you only speak with a reluctant acceptance. It is reasonable to assume that you don’t care much for being a mechanic. That it is not what you’re passionate about.” Tech tilted his head. “What are you passionate about?”

You considered his words. There was one thing, a long-forgotten dream that you stuffed away to the far crevices of your mind. It felt strange to be pulling it back out now. “I suppose I always wanted to be a pilot. That wasn’t really an option on my home planet, though. People stuck to the ground. But I remember one time, my family and I visited a cousin on a different planet, and I was mesmerized by the stars, the feeling of traveling through space. When I came here, when I was on the ship that brought me here, I felt like that little girl again. Mesmerized by the stars.”

Tech’s hand came to rest on top of your own. You froze at the contact. When was the last time someone touched you? “When this is over, you should come with us,” Tech said. “I serve as our pilot now, but it’s not really something I care for. If you would like to, I mean.”

“Really?”

“I could teach you the basics, if you’d like, and then you could take over—”

“TECH’S GOT A GIRLFRIEND!” Wrecker shouted, his voice echoing off the walls. He made kissy noises in your direction.

You jumped away like you’d been shocked. Tech whipped around to glare at his brother.

Omega tugged on Wrecker’s arm, forcing him to return to their task. “Shh, let’s let them be.”

Tech looked back at you. “We can talk about it more later, okay?”

You nodded. “Okay.”

Now, you worried you would never get the change. TAY-0, who you and Tech worked so hard in restoring, was destroyed just before the race started. All hope seemed lost, but then Tech volunteered himself as the racer. Kriff, it made you sick to think of him on the track. He could handle himself, probably, but there were so many risks. People played dirty out there. If he wasn’t careful, his first race might just be his last.

You muttered a prayer to the Maker as the race began. You didn’t want to lose him. Not when you just met him. You watched as his speeder took off, falling behind everyone else.

“Do you know what you’re doing?” you asked, anxiety biting at your nerves.

“Of course I do,” Tech reported. The nervousness he had around you before had melted away. “I’m being strategic. I have a lot of incentive to win, don’t I?”

Your face grew warm. “Yes, yes you do.”

Wrecker bumped his shoulder against yours. When you looked up at him, he wiggled his eyebrows at you. “Lotta incentive, huh?”

“Hush!”

You chewed on the corner of your nail as you watched the race. With every movement, you worried that Tech wasn’t going to be able to pull through. Then he took the tunnel to the left, and it felt like you died then and there. Didn’t he know that he wasn’t supposed to take that one? Didn’t he know that was dangerous?

“Tech, I swear, if you die out there, I’m gonna kill you,” you muttered.

He laughed. “Worry not, cyar’ika. I have not intention of dying today.”

And you were glad he didn’t. As he crossed the finished line, winning the race, all of your worries and anxieties exploded into pure joy. All around you, the crowd shouted his name. Tech! Tech! Tech! He got out of his speeder, looking out at the crowd in amazement. Then his focus turned you.

You ran toward him, throwing your arms around his shoulders, burying your face in the crook of his neck.

“Oh! This is nice,” he said, his arms wrapping around you.

“If I’m going to go with you, you’re not allowed to scare me like that again!” you said.

Tech’s mouth twitched slightly, a small smirk forming on his face. “You know, I think I deserve a good, proper reprimand, don’t you?” When your breath caught in your throat, he continued, “Perhaps we should take this to the pit?”

That was how you ended up seated on a table, legs wrapped around Tech’s waist, fingers pulling at his hair, kissing him so hard you were sure your lips were going to be bruised. His fingers dug into your hips, pulling you close against his chest, like he was trying to mold you into him. His tongue darted out, tracing along your bottom lip. Your lips parted, letting him in, his tongue exploring your mouth like he was trying to commit every part of you to memory.

“We should,” you mumbled against his lips, “go rescue Cid.”

“Wrecker and Omega got it handled,” Tech said, pulling away for a moment to catch his breath. He nuzzled his nose against yours. “Let me enjoy you.”

“Hey, is this is how your flight lessons are going to go?” you asked, your breath fanning over his face.

Tech let out a chuckle. “Only if you’re a good student.”

“Mm, I promise to be on my best behavior then.”

Tech leaned back in, his lips molding against yours. You moaned slightly, tugging him closer. But, you weren’t given the opportunity to enjoy him like you wanted to because—

“TECH? Where are you? We need to get Cid—OH MY GOD!” Wrecker shouted. “We already got one kid to deal with, don’t be adding another to this!”

You pulled away, laughing so hard you snorted. Tech glared at his brother, but reluctantly unwound himself from you. He held out his hands and helped you down from the table. One hand held onto yours, keeping you close.

“We will continue this later.”

“I look forward to it.”

And, oh, you did.

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vikkirosko · 2 months

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Hello!! It's been a long while since I requested, and I wanted to take the chance. (Btw, have you watched Adventure Time?) :3

As I remember, it was the usual popular male read who is tall and sporty. (Craig, Tweek, Clyde, Butters)

[So how we remember the m!reader, he is the extroverted guy who's definitely hyperactive with his energy and cheerfulness. He reminds me of Sunshine's characters.] [And we know that he's calmer when sick or when something unpleasant happens] Imagine: When he is tired.

His friends definitely know how m!reader is when tired and especially if not sleeping in a sleepover at the time 4-5am, but regardless it depends.

So now m!reader's boyfriend(s) are having a sleepover at his place, and there are friends as well, as always he checks on his friends and his lover. Being caring to everyone is just how he is. He had planned a lot with movies, snacks, games, and activities for comfort stuff. (M!reader has a habit of having his hand on their boyfriend's waist 😏). As time goes on, it becomes dark outside and pretty late in time itself. Each hour, m!reader becomes calmer and calmer. It is noticeable. Regardless, he's tired, but this has time for everyone. Until as I said, it has to be way late, like 4-5 am when he's a bit grumpy. Someone's annoying him while he's relaxing on the couch/bed/somewhere to sit? He'll kick them off that place where he was resting. Is someone trying to get on his nerves? A punch on the arm without remorse. That counts to his bae, but he's way softer with them to hit or punch, but a pinch won't hurt anyone. 😉 If his love is tired and need sleep, he'll let them in the room and get the friends to the living room to have fun while his dear is resting with the snacks or sleeping. In the end, he can still keep on with everyone with his mouth shut. If everyone is going to sleep, it's definitely a win-win for him to relax and go to bed too, but his lover's ain't escaping him, they be there with him, spooning them even if tired. And in the morning, he's a bit calmer still, but his energy is definitely coming. ^^

-From 🌻Sunflower Anon.

Hi! I am glad to receive a new request from you! I've definitely watched four seasons of Adventure Time, maybe even five, but that was a long time ago, maybe ten years ago. Someday I will definitely watch it in its entirety, but I don't know when it will happen yet

Headcanons Sleepover

🖕 Craig Tucker x male!Reader 🚀

Craig loved coming to visit you. Your house was always quiet, and only you, with your infinite energy, were the source of the noise, but he didn't mind it. When you invited him to sleepovers at your house, he usually agreed, knowing that you and your friends would be able to have a good time. At your sleepovers, he knew that nothing would happen that would annoy him

During sleepovers at your house, you watched movies, played video games and more. Craig often sat next to you and your hand was on his waist, seemingly all the time. Sometimes you rested your head on his shoulder, closing your eyes and enjoying the calm atmosphere. When Craig wanted to rest, you took him to your room, brought him drinks and snacks, and left him in silence. You knew that as soon as he rested, he would return to you and your friends

When the morning came, you started to feel tired. At such moments, you could become irritable, so when your friends started to get on your nerves too much, you slapped them on the arm or leg. Craig could also irritate you a little sometimes, though not on purpose. At such moments, he received only a slight pinch

You always went to bed next to him. You hugged him, not giving him the slightest chance for personal space, put your head on top of his head and calmly fell asleep. Craig didn't care that when you woke up your friends would make fun of it. These jokes happened every time you had sleepovers. The warmth of your embrace and your calm breathing next to him were much more important

☕ Tweek Tweak x male!Reader ☕

Tweek invited you to his place for a sleepover several times. His parents didn't mind, and he felt calmer knowing that you were there. But when you had sleepovers at home, you always invited him. Tweek was glad to receive your invitations, and he knew that even though your friends were there besides the two of you, he still felt comfortable sitting next to you and feeling your hand on his waist

You usually spent your time noisily playing video games, chatting and relaxing, but sometimes Tweek got tired. At such moments, you took him to your room, brought him snacks and gave him the opportunity to relax. You didn't let your friends stop him from resting, realizing that Tweek needed a break, after which he could return to you, full of strength again

Closer to the morning, you became tired, and this made you more calm. Tweek saw you so calm when you were very tired or when you were sick. Every time one of your friends started jokingly interfering with your relaxation, you slapped a restless friend on the arm or leg. If a Tweek tried to do something like that, even if by accident, he got off with just a light pinch and your tired smile

It was only early in the morning that you all went to bed. Tweek has always been in your arms. You buried your face in his hair, hugging him to your chest, and Tweek hugged you back, feeling your heart beating. It was better than any lullabies for him. He felt calm in your arms, relaxing and enjoying the fact that you were there

🌮 Clyde Donovan x male!Reader 💧

Clyde loved spending time with you. At school, you resembled two suns, both popular, active, sociable. You had sleepovers from time to time, and you always invited Clyde to them. It was like there was some kind of unspoken rule. You had a good time playing the console in turn, watching a variety of movies and staying awake until the first rays of the sun

You often sat on the couch with each other, no matter what you were doing, and your hand was on Clyde's waist. He didn't pay attention to it, often throwing his arm over your shoulder, smiling broadly and continuing to chat with your friends. For both of you, such physical contacts were commonplace and neither you nor your friends paid attention to it anymore

Towards morning, you usually became more calm and irritable. This usually happened when you were tired or sick. At times like this, you didn't like being annoyed. Your friends got a slap on the arm or leg from you for this, but if Clyde did it, he got off with just a light pinch. Your friends used to joke that he was in a special position, to which Clyde himself smiled, rubbing the pinch spot, and said that he just had special privileges, because you were dating

When you went to bed, Clyde always lay down next to you, and you pulled him to you, hugging him and gradually starting to fall asleep. Clyde liked falling asleep next to you and he always hugged you back, not leaving you until the time you woke up, but even when you woke up, he was in no hurry to let you go, rejoicing at your warmth

⚡Butters Stotch x male!Reader 🔨

Butters rarely went to sleepovers. He was rarely invited there, and if such a thing happened, then there were no such rare cases after that. However, you always invited him to sleepovers. Butters told his parents that he was going to spend the night with a friend, because they still did not know about your relationship, but it was not so important that he told them, it was much more important that you could spend time together. During another sleepover, you, he and your friends were having a really good time and Butters felt right in his place

You sat next to him and, as if out of habit, kept your hand on his waist. Your friends have long stopped paying attention to this, taking the fact of your relationship for granted, sometimes joking that you need to be alone, especially when you were kissing. Butters smiled sheepishly, while you felt completely calm

When morning approached, usually at four or five o'clock in the morning, you became tired. You were irritable at times like this. When someone tried to annoy you, even if just as a joke, you would shamelessly slap their arm or leg. If Butters did it, he got off with just a light pinch. You didn't want him to be hurt, but you weren't going to be annoyed when you were tired either

It was only when you went to bed that you finally calmed down. Every time you pulled your boyfriend to you, burying your face in his neck and peacefully falling asleep, feeling completely at peace. Even if Butters tried to move away a little, you didn't let it happen, smiling a little, even if you were half asleep. Butters fell asleep in your arms, feeling calm and happy. He wishes that someday you could fall asleep like this more often

#south park #south park x reader #south park headcanons #Craig Tucker #Craig Tucker x Reader #tweek tweak x reader #tweek tweak #Clyde Donovan #clyde donovan x reader #butters stotch #butters stotch x reader

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