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dangermousie · 9 days

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A danmei lover's biased and incomplete het web novel rec list

@mercipourleslivres thanks for inspiring me!

When it comes to Chinese web novels, I mainly read danmei. I tend not to care too much for OP heroine with a hero who dotes on her for no reason as she fights with 14 year olds narratives, nor inner courtyard fights. BUT!!! There are some het web novels I like and so here is my biased and incomplete rec list. Most of these don't have OP heroines, and very little to none courtyard fights.

Before I start, my favorite het web novel authors are: Gong Xinwen, Mo Shu Bai, Peng Lai Ke, and Jiu Lu Fei Xiang. I have yet to read anything bad by them.

Anyway, rec list:

1000 Miles of Bright Moonlight - one of my ultimate favorites, this would make such an epic drama! A smart as hell heroine, a hero who is a monk and a warrior (but also terminally?) ill and such a vivid world and amazing secondary characters (heroine’s brother is possibly my favorite supporting character of all time) and so much angst and happy ending. This has an amazing romance but it’s not romance-centric if it makes sense - ML doesn’t appear for a while. But once he does, it’s worth it!

Accompanying the Phoenix - the one that just got adapted into The Legend of Shen Li, this is high adventure and cottage core and funny and tragic and powerful ML being putty in the hands of capable FL and just EVERYTHING.

Apocalypse Arrival - Gong Xinwen’s novels are made just for me. Her heroines are always powerful as fuck and rescue abused MLs. In this novel, our heroine who lives in the post-apocalyptic world, wakes up right before that apocalypse happens. She forms a survival crew and also rescues ML who has miraculous blood and has been drained of it and is now hunted after the rescue for it. SO GOOD!!!

Black Moonlight Holds the BE Script - so fucked up, so good, with monster hero who learns to love and be human and heroine who learns to love and be human (but from the other side, her tower of perfection.) Much better than the drama which I did enjoy.

The Blue Whisper - the drama was so-so, but the novel is a bona fide angst masterpiece, which really delves into what it feels like to be imprisoned or to love.

Counterattack of the Cannon Fodder Chambermaid - I remember starting this and loving the realistic feel and the heroine and wanting to stab the hero and @mercipourleslivres telling me to be patient. She was right, by the end I was on board with both the hero (who was abused and is rather autistic-coded) and the OTP. Anyway, heroine is a servant who was a concubine in the last life and got killed as part of a rich family’s harem intrigues. In this life, she just wants to keep her head down but her life gets derailed anyway. She gets sold away and eventually made a servant in the household of an exiled prince who takes a fancy to her and she endures it because what choice does she have? All she wanted was to serve out her term and become a small time merchant. This is quite realistic about lack of options for women, especially lower class women or upper class male attitudes (ML is never vicious or mean to FL but it does not initially occur to him to wonder if she fancies him or enjoys being his concubine or w/e.) It is a DELIGHTFUL slow burn tho as they grow to love each other and grow together and become one of the most wholesome cnovel couples out there.

Dandere General and His Lord - hi there, Gong Xinwen! God, I love this one. Heroine transmigrates from modern world into a brutal slave-holding world at war (think something like Warring States era.) Our heroine transmigrates into the body of a noblewoman who just hung herself. When she comes to, she discovers that woman’s twin brother was the ruler of a city poisoned by a rival claimant and the besieging army of said claimant is about to take the city and original occupant of the body and the rest of the family chose suicide as a way to avoid dishonor. Our heroine refuses, schemes with advisors to pass as the brother and rally the troops. Once the invaders are defeated, she keeps on the masquerade and rides off to one of the never-ending wars “she” is summoned to. Our hero couldn’t be farther from this. A slave and a son of a slave, he’s escaped a horrific, starving childhood during which he narrowly avoided being murdered or raped, and ended up in the army. When the story opens, he distinguished himself in battle and as a reward, he and a few of his fellow slave warriors are invited to a banquet, where they are given some alcohol and to be playthings of any nobles who want them. One of them does not survive this but ML is lucky - heroine feels terrible and so “claims” him for herself. Instead she just tends to his wounds and sends him back. She does not fancy him or anything, she is just a human being with a conscience. And the story goes from there.

Demon King's Repayment - another delicious Gong Xinwen tale with a powerful ML dedicated to capable FL. This one is a great fantasy plot (I keep imagining it as an animated series) and a sprawling cast of amazing secondaries (and secondary OTPs - there is, I swear, an OTP that is Dong Hua x Feng Jiu done thru GXW lens) to boot.

Doomed to Be Cannon Fodder - I hesitated to put this one on the list because by the end I was not keen on how misogynistic novel got to original female lead but it was one of my earliest novels and I loved it for 90% and it’s fucking hilarious at times. Heroine transmigrates as bit villainess into a novel, all she wants is not to die, but her new attitude of “pls stay away” catches the attention of her terrifying general husband. Honestly, imo still worth it.

Dreamer in the Spring Boudoir - my n1 novel on this list, smart and fierce and don’t really read this for romance because it does not start until really late, but ice cold heroine x ice cold hero both of equal brains and ruthlessness is everything. I went from loathing the ML to finding him fascinating to adoring him (and yet he softened around the edges only for FL, he never became “nice”) and loved FL throughout; secondaries are epic. If you read only one non-danmei web novel, make it this one.

The Emperor’s Beloved Ugly Girl - my n2 novel on this list. Our heroine is the unlucky laundry maid A’Chou. She is a di daughter of an upperclass family but her family got destroyed in one of the political upheavals of the time and A’Chou, only a small child at the time, was the only survivor and was made an enslaved laundry maid. Due to various events, at the start of the novel she is a laundry maid in a minister’s household and the minister’s beloved daughter is having a fit because she’s supposed to marry the former Crown Prince which may have been great a few years back but Crown Prince had since been deposed, tortured, imprisoned and now is living in the middle of nowhere under conditions that are too meager to be called house arrest. And he’s seriously crippled too. Understandably, the young lady doesn’t want to marry him! She’d rather kill herself and so she does. And so, a desperate plan is hatched - why don’t we pretend the laundry maid is the di daughter of the minister’s household and send her off? And so A’Chu is sent as the bride. She arrives to discover a broke, seriously injured man on the verge of death…and we go from there. This is so gorgeous and tender and slow in just the right way and like AAAAAA! Secondary OTPs (one of which is MM) are also epic.

Futu Tower - the drama (Unchained Love) was a mess but the novel is such a lovely, dark exploration of coming back to life, for the ML from his dark revenge-strewn path and for heroine from not being allowed wishes of her own. She is a tribute bride, he’s a (fake) eunuch, they are both servants who use themselves to achieve goals and find peace and happiness together.

The Grand Princess - a tale where both members of the OTP reincarnate as their younger selves after killing each other in their 50s, and get a new start, this is smart and slow and so good in portraying old souls in young bodies. Their rediscovery of not just each other but themselves and their passion for living is just AAAAAA!

Heroine Saves Gentleman - Gong Xinwen novel so we have a tough martial artist lady saving a very upper class scholar and it goes from there. If elegant gorgeous ML being saved and protected (and lovingly dommed) by awesome FL is your bag, pls come right in.

Husband Be a Gentleman - schemer meet schemer. He’s an idle prince she’s perfect daughter, in reality both are wolves out for blood. Mmmm. Very OTP gets together early and is us against the world.

I’ll Be the Male Lead’s Sister in Law - one of my all time favorite novels. Heroine is made to marry a disabled nephew of the emperor. He used to be a victorious god of war but went mad and now is basically locked away and kept as a beast. GOD I LOVE THIS NOVEL SO MUCHHHHH! So much hurt/comfort and awesome OTP and after he eventually recovers, all he wants to do is to fight and murder things and dote on wifey. MMM. He’s honestly one of my fave MLs.

I Married a Disabled Tyrant After Transmigrating - if you have a Florence Nightingale complex, this is for you. Heroine wakes up as tribute bride to an almost dead dragon lord and slowly nurses him back to life as his rivals try to murder him. They are both utter adorable babies!

Let the Villain Go - another Gong Xinwen novel, this and Apocalypse Arrivals are AUs of each other. Heroine is surviving in the apocalypse, ML is the “bugbear” of the world but in reality just reacting to all abuse and torture and after she accidentally saves him, devotes himself. Fun fun fun!

Long Wind Crossing - Amazing ML and FL who grow together, clever plot, arranged marriage to love etc etc. Oh, and one point he feeds her his blood to keep her alive, what’s not to love? (Adapted into Chang Feng Du/Destined)

Lost You Forever - this is a short but delicately wistful tale of trauma and loss and love, wrapped in a high fantasy setting but so relatable despite it.

Love In Another Life: My Gentle Tyrant - so so fucked up in the best way! ML cannot live with OR without heroine. It opens on them banging in jail night before her execution (ordered by him) with corpses of men he killed for trying to defile her cooling nearby. If you want healthy relationships with respectful boundaries, gentle and considerate male leads who are modern men in period clothes, OP heroines who have everyone help them and are OP to the max, fluff and wholesomeness, that is about the worst book for you.If you want complexity, dysfunction, darkness, pain and an absolutely lyrical even if fucked up story, come right IN!!!!I am so fucking in love with the melancholy heroine, with ruthless psycho hero and the endless regret and devotion and paaaaain!

The Marquis Is Innocent - our heroine is a beautiful woman married to a warlord who hates her family. (Yes, this was gonna be The Prisoner of Beauty until SZE tax scandal.) Except she's a transmigrator from the future who knows how it ended last time around and has no interest to end up this tragically. This is in my top 5 - FL is smart but believably so (and doesn't have super battle powers) and ML is a believable period warlord. The way their relationship develops so gradually and the way his character changes so gradually as well (and the way they slowly fall in love, her slower than him) is just amazing. It is such a smart, nuanced, gorgeous slow burn. With some gonzo sex scenes :P

Mulberry Song - you like tragic endings? Come right IN! This is short and heartbreaking and wistful and very what-if.

Nightfall (Ever Night) - so long but also so smart and unusual and bloody and tho it’s not primarily a romance, you will never see another ML who loves his FL as much as Ning Que does his Sang Sang.

Offering Salted Fish to Master - in some ways, this novel is a mess, but I am recommending it because this is a rare example of "nope he's 100% a villain and murderdude and odd, but he does love the heroine" that the author commits to.

Pihanjin - yet another awesome PLK novel, this is once again, like with Marquis, a ruthless man and a beautiful woman getting a second chance on a second go-around. FL is a lot more wounded this time around though. If you LOVE watching ML grovel and slowly, gradually win FL over, this one is for you.

Princess Agents - a dark tale with an incredibly competent and militarily powerful/ruthless heroine and two terrifying men who love her (but neither is as terrifying as she is.) There is an OTP switch halfway through that shockingly makes sense and it's just SO SO GOOOOOOOD

Rebirth of the Malicious Empress of Military Lineage - this is probably the one “typical” novel on this list, heroine is reborn as her youngest self and gets revenge on those who wronged her last time around. It is really really well-written and heroine is competent, hero is doting and powerful etc. It’s not a trope I tend to love but I do when it’s done THIS well.

Rebirth of the Tyrant’s Pet: Regent Prince is Too Fierce: Borgias cnovel style! Our heroine was empress in last life and put her husband on the throne tho he did not love her. However, he had her executed and had his half-brother carry out the orders and heroine died horrifically. She opens her eyes and she’s a little girl again. The OTP this time around is heroine and half-brother executioner. Why do I love it? Heroine is smart and tough but also this is a rare rebirth novel where heroine does NOT decide to seek revenge for past life wrongs because they haven’t happened yet! In fact, she sees ML abused and stands up for him because he’s a kid and no kid should be mistreated and this go around he hasn’t done anything wrong. She also gets and likes her former life husband. Anyway, this is fakecest galore because she’s supposed to be their half-sister and while she knows (from past life) she is not, they do not and fall for her anyway. ML is especially gonzo, at one point carving chunks of his flesh to save her. He’s feral and unhinged and she’s the one person he worships because she protected him and like - it’s all awesome. (I love secondary ML too.)

Reborn to Love Lord Qiansui - yes, this is a eunuch novel! If you like gender tropes reversals, this one is for you. Heroine is a tough martial artist, hero is a smart as hell and powerful eunuch. A real eunuch. Heroine finds out she owes him her life and decides to protect him. This is a total delight and an awesome love story between two really scarred people. And yes, there is sex - heroine literally reads manuals on pegging :P

Return of the Swallow - so freaking long! But really good. Heroine is neither transmigrator nor reincarnator, just a smart period woman. She is a lost family daughter taken back in. Her father is a minister in a dying empire (father-daughter relationship is one of the best things in this novel), her OTP is enemy general, and the smartness and the awesomeness of this all knows no bounds.

Seven Unfortunate Lifetimes - probably the wackiest JLFX novel I read, this is quite different from Love You Seven Times drama that was adapted from it. Our deity protagonists go through a bunch of lives figuring out they fancy each other. It's light like a souffle but just as delicious.

To Be a Virtuous Wife - some people prefer 8 treasures trousseau but I never warmed up to that one. This one is so good, with smart people (who actually enjoy sex, a ratity) and a perfect mix of plot and romance.

Transmigrator Meets Reincarnator - my very first web novel. A lot lighter than a lot of the ones on this list but a total delight. Heroine transmigrates into a novel as the heroine; she has no interest in drama or chasing true love, she just wants to live a nice life with her nice husband. Too bad for her, her husband has reincarnated into his younger self and remembers how she betrayed him, so is not interested. This one is funny and light and romance doesn’t start till late on but a total delight!

Wishing You Eternal Happiness - this is tied with Dreamer as my favorite het web novel ever though it couldn’t be more different from Dreamer, with its hard-edged and hard-souled protagonists ruthlessly cleaving their way to the world and, eventually, each other, its smart cynical air. Except in one thing - the world of Wishing is just as bloody and dark. Its two protagonists are gentle, deeply wounded souls who may find salvation in each other but even something as basic as safety almost seems out of reach.

Jliafu, our heroine, is neither a modern-day transmigrator, nor some exotic princess or demoness. She is very much a period woman of her time, from a weathy merchant clan, whose beauty is her curse. You can tell the novel’s tone from that utterly bleak opening chapter where she, a favorite concubine of a capricious dying emperor, is ordered to be buried alive with him and is not even given the “grace” of white silk but slowly suffocates in the coffin, scrabbling at the lid. There is no grand threats of vengeance on her part, not dramatic opera events. Just despair and death. The whole introductory chapter is haunted by emotional ghosts - the empress’ unrequited love for the monster on the imperial bed (turning into desire for Jiafu’s suffering after he dies), the emperor slowly dying in his prime after waging too many wars, and his fear of being haunted by Pei Youan, a brilliant if sickly minister who died of illness long ago on one of imperial campaigns. There is no triumph for anyone, only loss.

When she wakes up as still a young woman, all she wants is to escape the same fate. There are no plans for power or revenge, only a desire for survival. And so she latches on asking for help from Pei Youan, the only man in her past go-around who showed any consideration and desire and ability to protect her, though he barely knew her. Pei Youan is probably my favorite het web novel ML. Despite his brains and ability, he drifts through life. In modern terms, he clearly has depression. One of the biggest, best joys of the novel is watching these two very good, very quiet, very wounded people discover happiness and love with each other. I sort of want to cry just thinking about it, tbh.

The Yandere Came During the Night - a bit of fluff that’s oddly delightful. Heroine is reborn as a (fake) sister of ML, she hurts her legs saving him and the “siblings” form a bond that ends up in fakecest delight. They are both smart and efficient and he becomes a sexy marquis etc.

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hazbinhotel-bitch · 2 months

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He Knows: Alastor x (Name)

(Name) had a few more times after being confronted by Alastor. She was a little surprised he knew who she was, but she knew he had many connections and probably sent out his shadows to keep an eye on every Overlord and probably noticed a reoccurring face. (Name) was glad that Alastor let her continue with her research to see if it was worth writing about. But with the few visits she made she started to like their company, there was a certain pull about the sinners that resided in the Hotel.

(Name) was by the bar talking with Husk and Angel-Dust. They were all chatting and laughing as (Name) was telling them of her times as a human. Granted she did have to look back at her journal that she kept a page entry of memorable memories of her life. She kept a few of her happily memories as a human where she would bring up in conversations from time to time.

"So picture this; it's late at night. I was a young woman dressing like a young man but if I'm being honest I looked like little boy, but I was trying to get into a pub that lead to an underground fight club. So when they kicked me out from the front door I decided to get in through the back, luckily for me knew the building layout so I was able to break into a home that had a connecting basement." she explained "But because of the two Basements were connected I though it'd be easy but, it turned out this place was connected through several other building and I ended up getting lost."

Angel just laughed at the misfortune she had and called her a stupid bitch which she took no offence. She was pretty young at the time she was only in her early 20s at the time so she thought she knew everything. But in the end she published her experience in the underground tunnels and that many building basements that connected intricately with one another. She went on to talk about how if she stayed longer she was afraid she would find the underground people who live in the swerves. In the end of anecdote she compared the idea of meeting the underground cavillation is no different to hell itself and the people inhabiting the place. Through out this Alastor was listening from a distance with an arched brow, he kept his smile up as he let his intellectual mind wonder.

She certainly has a way with her story telling... and she does seem to captivate people with her charms.

Alastor thought as he watched her with a slight curious gaze. In no means did he think he was lacking in his work with the broadcast she's had for years, but in the seven year hiatus he took notice that no many sinners cared he had left or when he came back, aside from Vox the demon with the TV head who was pissed that Alastor decided to come back to the limelight. But Alastor had been keeping tabs a fairly known writer under the name of Siege, a couple of decade after he arrived he noticed paper article titled "Siege's Scandal Sheets" where it would be highly detailed of very sensitive subjects on many Overlords and even those from Ars Goetia and the Seven Deadly Sins. The Radio demon was rather impressed but wary but soon caught on that the scandal sheets has started to slow down since (Name) made an appearance near the Hazbin hotel. It wasn't long until he realized (Name) was the cunning writer, Siege from the scandal sheets of hell.

Alastor was debating whether to use (Name) to his advantages and have her work for him to get him more stories of hell to get his listenership up again, and who better than the infamous Siege of the scandal sheets.

"Ah My dear (Name)" Alastor finally said making his way to the trio of sinners "What a lovey anecdote"

(Name) sighed with a smile still recalling her time as a young human journalist doing whatever she could to get the biggest story with freedom.

"I was curious my dear. If you were journalist in your human life, what are you doing here in hell of an occupation?" Alastor asked with a smile.

(Name) didn't trust his interest. When she started showing up more and more Alastor either avoided her like she was a fly on a wall or if she started to try and get some kind of information he would belittle her simply offer her a deal of an exchange of secrets which she refused. But this was new. He was asking her of her occupation in hell.

Does he know? Surly he know... he's one a very intelligent and cunning man. There's no way he doesn't know who I am... or maybe I'm looking too much into it. Maybe he is wondering why I am here all the time... that has to be the reason he is asking me.

(Name) thought to herself in her inner monologue moment in her mind as she simply stared at Alastor. From the outside it looked like she was simply taking in his features, as if she were to paint his face on a canvas and she was simply as admiring. But she smirked when she noticed his smile twitch in annoyance along with his eye as he waited for her answer.

"I've had a few odd jobs here and there, but Journalism doesn't really work well here in hell. Velvette is the main dominator when it come to news here in Hell" (Name) mentioned with a shrug.

"Perhaps... but Velvette never facts checks her news, which makes her unreliable. Feeble gossip and nothing more" Alastor mused out "But~"

His voice was like a sing song tone. (Name) could feel her heart race as he drew closer to her as his smile seemed far more sinister now.

"There is one person the people of hell wait for" he was close to her face before he straightened up with pride as he looked down at her "Aside from myself that is"

"And who is that Mr. Radio demon" she scoffed trying to keep her tone aloof like her expression.

"Siege of the Scandal Sheets"

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Previous Chapter: Here Next Chapter: Here

#hazbin alastor #alastor x reader #hazbin fanfic #hazbin hotel #radio demon #x reader #alastor #alastor hazbin hotel

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freelancearsonist · 2 months

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Whole

Steve Harrington x fem!Reader

Rated MA for the most long-winded poetic smut i've ever written jfc 🤦‍♀️ slow burn fluff with a couple sprinkles of angst for flavor, reader uses fem pronouns and is described as having female parts, it's dirty y'all but at least they use protection

7,470 Words

A/N: you all know my mo by now i disappear for a year and then come back and lay down some god damned PORN. this fic is no exception to the rule. @shakespeareanwannabe requested this back in july and she literally just asked for a cute moment between steve and dustin, sorry you got 6k words more than you bargained for 😂 but also thank you for betaing and the constant validation you're the best ily 🖤

Steve’s not sure how it even worked.

He can still remember the look on Robin’s face when you agreed, how she was speechless for almost ten minutes because she couldn’t process what had just happened.

Steve’s reaction was about the same as hers, in all honesty. He’s gotten so used to striking out that asking people out has become something of a game to him. He knows he’ll get a no, and he knows Robin will laugh her ass off at him. But what can he say? He likes putting a smile on his best friend’s face.

Needless to say, you’ve shaken him. In the best possible way. Because your answer was three letters instead of two.

And now, he's a little bit in over his head.

Or, to be more accurate, a lot in over his head.

It seems like it’s been ages since he’s gone on a date, even though it’s only been a few months at most. He feels lost, like he’s completely unlearned everything he ever knew about girls.

He hates it, despises it with every fiber of his own being, but he also knows it’s true; he needs advice. And although he’ll never admit it to the little shithead’s face, there’s no one better he can think of going to than his very own protege. Who better to remind him of his own prowess than the person who learned everything they know from him?

One look at Dustin’s smug little face and Steve almost regrets it. Almost.

“Just can’t stay away, can you?”

“Yeah, yeah.” Steve rolls his eyes and gives the younger boy a little shove, camouflaging it with an affectionate pat on the back. “This is strictly business, Henderson.”

“Oh, is it now?” The younger boy’s voice takes on a smug tone as he folds his fingers together and leans back in his chair. “Well then, why don’t you have a seat? Step into my office.”

Steve rolls his eyes and slides into the booth, shooting a smile and a “thank you” to the kind waitress who delivers two milkshakes to their table.

Dustin takes his time and makes a meal of unwrapping his straw, feeding off of Steve’s clear impatience Steve’s fingers tap against the table, reminding himself that patience is necessary when you come to someone for a favor. It’s just that it’s Dustin, and Dustin knows exactly how to get under the older boy’s skin in the most annoying-yet-oddly-endearing fashion.

“So…” Dustin finally says after a lengthy sip of strawberry milkshake. “What brings you so humbly to me?”

“I’ve got a date.”

And Dustin, the little bastard–he laughs. A deep, rumbling belly laugh, so pure and unfiltered that the three other occupied tables in the diner pause their conversations to get a look at the boy clutching his sides.

Steve’s a little embarrassed by the attention, but even more embarrassed that Dustin’s reaction is so genuine. The fact that the idea of him having a date is so laughable is a bit of a punch to the gut. It hasn’t really been that long, has it?

When Dustin’s laughter finally dies down he realizes Steve’s face is completely serious, and it makes him giggle even more.

“Wait, you’re actually serious? Who on earth did you manage to pull?”

Steve’s nearly bashful as he says your name, and even more bashful when Dustin’s jaw visibly drops.

“No fucking way. I’d believe anyone else, but her? She’s like… hotter than Phoebe Cates. There’s no way you wouldn’t strike out with her.”

Steve’s immediately on the defensive. Is it really so hard to believe that he, former king of Hawkins High, could pull the most gorgeous girl in town?

But that’s just it. There’s really no one like you, not in his eyes. He’s admired you since freshman year and never once even tried with you because he knew he wasn’t worthy. You were always in the background–a beautiful, kind, smart, funny girl just out of his reach. Part of the reason he even asked you out was because he was so sure he would strike out. In the end, losing his confidence was exactly what he needed to pull the girl of his dreams.

And that’s why there’s so much riding on this. You’ve always been his biggest “what if”, the girl he wonders about when thinking that maybe not trying has been holding him back. And apparently, it has.

“Look, I don’t even know how it happened, okay? But she said yes, and… and I really don’t want to blow it.”

“Well duh. You’ll have to leave town if you blow it with her, you know that, right? If she doesn’t think you’re worth it, no one else in this town ever will again.”

“That’s exactly what I’m afraid of!” Steve groans, slouching down so far in the booth that Dustin can just barely see his poor, overwhelmed face.

“Steve, listen…” Dustin’s voice takes on an almost fatherly quality, an omniscient tone that gives off the illusion of great hidden knowledge. He gets like this sometimes, and Steve’s not always sure that it is just an illusion. “Don’t let this go to your head, but you’re, like, one of the coolest guys I know. If she doesn’t like you… that’s her problem, not yours. Okay?”

Steve straightens in his seat, a little shocked to hear such kind words from a friend that he’s used to being mercilessly teased by.

“No, no, no, it’s going to your head. I take it all back. Forget I said anything.” Dustin’s hearty giggle makes Steve smile as he sets a wad of bills on the table and slides out of the booth.

“You’re not so bad Henderson, you know that?” He gives the younger boy’s full head of curls an affectionate ruffle. “Thanks, kid. I’ll radio later.”

Not that Steve didn’t have total faith in his young protege, but it’s still a relief that the pep talk turned out to be exactly what he needed to hear. Dustin’s right, after all. Steve’s worked hard to become the man he’s always wanted to be. He may not be dripping charisma or sex appeal the way he used to, but he’s much more comfortable in his own skin. That’s what counts, right?

And you really are his dream girl. The opportunity to take you out tonight, even if it ends up being your first and only date together, is an honor. He’s much less focused now on all the ways he could screw up, hyper-fixated on putting the effort in to make this the best night of your life.

That effort comes out in the carefully selected suit jacket he dons over his white button-up, the extra spritz of cologne, the careful touch-up shave to vanquish his five o’clock shadow, the extra ten minutes using the perfect amount of product in his hair so that it stays in place yet is still soft to the touch.

By the time he gets to Enzo’s (half an hour early, mind), he’s practically vibrating with nerves and anticipation. He’s never been much of an overthinker, but he sure is tonight. Is this place too much for the first date? Would you rather do something lowkey, like catch a movie or go for a walk in the park? He has to remind himself a couple of times that you agreed to this, that you wouldn’t have said yes if you weren’t interested in the arrangement.

To say he’s prepared for this is putting it lightly. He’s run through every possible scenario in his mind, gone over conversation starters and questions he wants to ask you over and over again until he knows exactly how he wants to phrase each thing.

And still, nothing could prepare him for when you walk through the door.

He has to physically restrain his jaw from dropping because in the moment he sees you, every well-planned thought and all etiquette is flushed down the proverbial pipes. You’re nothing short of breathtaking in a dress that hugs all the right curves and shows just enough cleavage to have him imagining what else there might be to see. Your hair is pinned back out of your face, eyes framed by just the slightest bit of makeup to make the color of your irises pop. He swears he’s never seen a shade quite like them. It’s like you move in slow motion as you approach him–he sees the entrance of the smoking hot love interest in every romantic comedy, complete with smoke and fireworks, as you move towards the table.

And then some sense of decorum returns to his addled brain, and he quickly shoots up so he can pull out your chair for you like a proper gentleman. He catches just the slightest whiff of your perfume, and he’s a goner. He’s ready to sign his life away to you, to yank his own heart out of his chest to offer to your careful hands.

He has to give his head a shake to compose himself before he goes any further off the deep end. No one’s ever thoroughly shaken him the way you have, and it’s been a matter of thirty seconds. It’s almost intimidating, the effect you have on him.

“You look… incredible,” he fumbles as he takes his seat across from you. “I mean, you always do, but… wow.”

The shy giggle you emit tugs at a heartstring he didn’t even know he had.

“Thank you,” you tell him with a genuine smile. “You clean up very well yourself.”

“I do like to put in some effort every once in a while.” He flashes the most charming smile he can muster, and just like that he’s back. His resolve to impress you is reinforced tenfold. You’ve shaken him, and it’s such an unfamiliar feeling that he’s practically bumbling. He wants to shake you just as badly.

The food’s delicious, and the conversation’s even better. He has a track record for taking out a more–for lack of a better term–bimbo-y type, and that’s definitely not you. You’re smart, you’re witty, but you don’t make him feel like an idiot. He’s so taken with you that he doesn’t even notice that three hours have passed until he looks around the room and notices that every table is now empty and bussed.

The waiter delivers the check, and Steve notices you gnawing on your lip.

“What’s on your mind?” He asks, trying not to be too prying.

“I don’t want this to be over yet.”

Steve smiles. He’s got you; hook, line, and sinker. He’s never been so sure of anything, and that surprises him. He’s used to dates who are easy to read and even easier to take home, and those aren’t the impressions you’ve been giving him. To know that you’re feeling exactly what he’s feeling is a huge confidence boost.

“I don’t either.”

Your hand is so small compared to his. That’s all he can think about as he strolls next to you, his fingers intertwined with yours. He’s always considered hand-holding to be child’s play, it’s never excited him before the way it does in this moment with you.

It’s pitch black in the park and he can hear the overlapping chirping of summer cicadas and grasshoppers, the perfect background noise now that the conversation has died down. It’s less about getting to know each other at this point and more just basking in each other’s presence, prolonging the inevitable because neither one of you can bear to call it a night when it’s been such a good few hours.

You’re shocked, to say the very least. Steve certainly has a reputation, and it’s not for being a romantic. Yet everything tonight has flown in the face of all the rumors you’ve been hearing since junior high. You figured he’d be a fun fling, and probably only one night at that–you’d made your peace with the idea. To find that he’s kind, considerate, funny, and can match your intellect and quick wit… it’s a very pleasant surprise. And that’s what has you out well past a decent hour, giddy over simply holding his hand like you’re a damned school girl all over again.

“I should probably let you go home,” Steve sighs wistfully. He hates to be the one to bring it up, but you’re on your fifth lap around the park and about to circle back to where your car is parked so now seems the best time.

You’re chewing your lip again, a thoughtful habit that makes his heart pound just a little bit harder.

Here’s the thing: you’re really not the bold type. You act confident, sure, but in practice it’s a lot more difficult for you. So no one’s more surprised than you are when you say, “You could come home with me. If you want.”

Steve’s definitely shocked, too. Less shocked at your proposition and more at the fact that he’s tempted to decline. Because no matter how much he’s been running through the back of his mind what you might look like under that gorgeous dress, he doesn’t want this to end there. For the first time in his life, he wants to find more meaning than sex out of a relationship. He doesn’t want to take you home and never see you again. He wants to take you out again, and again, and again, and again after that. He sees a future, for once, that doesn’t look dim and hopeless. That fact alone scares the shit out of him.

He realizes he’s waited way too long to reply and fumbles for an answer. “Of course I want to. I’d be an idiot not to. But…”

You chew that cursed bottom lip of yours again, and Steve has to focus on the obvious cue you’re giving him rather than the fact that he wants to be the next set of teeth around that lip.

He stops in his tracks, gently pulling on your hand to face him so he can take your other hand in his free one. “It’s not a bad but. I mean, I’m going to go home kicking myself for saying no because I really honestly do want to… well, y’know. But… I want to do this right with you. I want to take you out again. I want to get to know you and see where this goes. I can’t… I don’t want this to end tonight.”

He’s eternally grateful for how dark it is as he feels a flush consume his face. He can’t remember a time he’s been so honest and open, especially on a first date; but the look on your face tells him he’s done something right.

“Okay,” you tell him, squeezing his hands in yours. “You… honestly have no clue how nice it is to hear that.”

“Of course,” he continues, “if you just want me for my body, no hard feelings.”

You laugh at that, genuinely laugh, and Steve thinks it’s the best sound he’s ever heard.

“No,” you reassure him. “No, I… I wanna see where this goes, too.”

You’re stopped only a few paces from your car, and Steve knows with a twist of his gut that this is the end of the night. It makes his gut turn with disappointment, but also with anticipation of when he’ll see you next. Already, his mind is flooding with ideas of where he can take you and what you’ll do together.

You drop one of his hands so you can walk but keep a tight grip on the other until you get to your driver’s side door, hesitating outside because you’re still not ready for this to be over. It takes every ounce of restraint he has not to kiss you, unsure of if that would be moving too fast.

Thankfully, you make the call yourself. Leaning up on your toes, hands against his chest for balance, you press your lips against his and he has to summon every mite of strength not to moan. No one’s ever tasted so sweet, molded against him so perfectly. His hands drift from your shoulders down your arms, coming to rest on your waist as he pulls you just a little bit closer. It’s a fight of will not to overstep, to break off the kiss before it can become too heated. His mind is spinning by the time you break away. He’s aching for more, and he hopes you are too.

“Goodnight, sweetheart.”

“Goodnight, Steve.”

Your sweet voice replays in his mind all night, long after you’ve gotten into your car and driven away, long after he’s returned to his own vehicle and pulled the radio out from under the driver’s seat to check in with Dustin, long after he arrives home and soaks in a cold shower for longer than he probably should. He doesn’t think he’ll ever get your voice out of his head, and he couldn’t be any less upset about it.

He practically counts down the minutes until he sees you again. This time, he has a little less restraint. He greets you with a kiss–a sweet peck and a hand on your waist that leaves you aching for even more.

It’s a movie this time, a chance to enjoy each other’s company on a night you’re both too tired from working to engage in heavy conversation and getting to know each other further.

It starts with sharing popcorn, then holding hands, then somewhere along the way the film is completely forgotten in favor of your lips meeting his. His breath grows heavy as his hands hold your face, committing you to memory while resisting the urge to explore further. Your hands, meanwhile, are firmly on his thighs, gripping tightly to keep yourself steady as you do everything you can to keep yourself from crawling into his lap.

He whispers your name, and your grip on him tightens.

“W-we shouldn’t…” he murmurs, then gives up on the futile attempt at finishing his sentence so that he can pull you even deeper into the kiss as his tongue sweeps across your bottom lip.

It takes everything in him not to moan when your lips eagerly part to accept him.

Needless to say, once the credits start rolling you’re both more than a little hot under the collar.

“Let me buy you dinner,” Steve suggests as he woefully unwinds himself from you. Declining doesn’t even flicker through your mind as a possibility.

It’s not Enzo’s this time, but it doesn’t have to be. He could set a soggy peanut butter and jelly sandwich in front of you at this point and you’d still thank him for it. This time around, you’re not really as interested in the cuisine as you are just simply getting through this meal to what’s next. Because what’s next is all you’ve been thinking about since you walked through the doors the night of that very first date and saw Steve Harrington wearing a blazer for you. It’s a level of effort he’s definitely not known for–in fact, he’s built a reputation for putting in so little effort that it nearly made your jaw drop to see him trying. And it certainly made your heart skip a beat.

But then again, the Steve before you carelessly wolfing down his bacon cheeseburger seems very different from the Steve you knew in high school, even if you didn’t know that iteration as intimately as this one. That one was cool, collected, snarky and pompous and maddeningly desirable.

This Steve, your Steve, is nearly an exact foil. Much less cocky, a little less confident but more self-assured in the ways that actually hold meaning, less worried about what the people around him are observing of him than what you’re observing of him. He seems happier, more carefree, more eager to please others than simply himself. He’s grown so much in such a short amount of time, and you feel proud just for having the honor to witness it. Significantly more proud to be on the receiving end of his affections now that they hold the kind of value you’ve always wished they would.

He looks up and notices you staring at him while lost in thought, a small smile spreading across his lips as your eyes quickly dart away.

“What’s on your mind?” He questions as he licks a stray bit of ketchup from his thumb.

“Just… happy I’m here. With you.” It brings heat to your cheeks to admit it, but you don’t want him to go unappreciated in this moment.

It’s the right thing to say, because his smile grows even wider. “I’m happy too,” he admits. “I… I’ve wanted to ask you out for a while. Could never work up the courage, I guess.”

“Steve ‘the hair’ Harrington was intimidated by me?” You say it with a mock gasp, but your shock is more genuine than you give off. Never in a million years would you have thought that he, the man who could have whoever he wanted, would be worried over you saying no to him. It’s almost comical, especially considering the way you practically threw yourself at him on your first date. Of course then, you had no clue how much he’d developed as a person. You’re almost ashamed of your behavior now, as if you might’ve inadvertently been taking advantage of the new and improved Steve who isn’t just into you for a hookup.

He shrugs, nearly bashful at your teasing. “Never figured I was good enough for you. So I didn’t bother to try.”

You’re genuinely curious now, leaning in a little closer and brushing your fingers against his hand resting atop the diner counter. “What made you change your mind?”

“Honestly? I was so sure you’d say no that I asked just to give Robin a chuckle. She loves watching me get shot down.”

That makes you frown, and he’s quick to backtrack. “I wanted to! I just… I’ve had a bad track record lately. And you’re… you’re you. You’re the last person I should be worthy of.”

His eyes are quick to avert from your gaze, bottom lip tugged between his teeth as he contemplates whether he’s said too much.

“Steve…” you properly grab his hand now in the hopes that it’ll bring his eyes back to you, and it works. “You’re the only person I’ve deemed worthy in a long time, honestly.”

Steve Harrington is scaldingly warm. It’s one of many sensations forcing your mind into overdrive as he lays you delicately across the backseat of his beemer, one hand cushioning the back of your head while simultaneously deepening the already heated kiss and the other balancing his weight to lean over you in the cramped space without completely crushing you.

Your fingers tangle themselves into his soft brown locks, tugging ever-so-slightly as his tongue slips between your parted lips. He’s an eager explorer and you’re more than happy to let him take the lead, to show you all the skill you’ve heard so many whispers about.

You let out an involuntary moan as he wedges himself even closer to you, his body heat soaking through all the layers of clothing between the two of you and warming you all the way to your very bones.

You’re practically aching, ready to beg, and he knows it the second you wrap your legs around his waist in an attempt to get him even closer. If there’s one thing Steve Harrington’s good at, it’s assessing your needs. He pulls away just the slightest bit to adjust his position so he can get closer, wedging a knee between your legs to press right against your core, and it makes you jolt back against the car door at the same time his head hits the roof just a bit too hard.

You both pause for a moment, the reality of your situation hitting you simultaneously, and then you’re laughing. It’s light and edged with unresolved want, but it’s enough to fracture the tension of the moment.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers. “Shouldn’t have gotten so carried away. This isn’t how I want to do this.”

“No?”

“No. You deserve way better than this old beater,” he chuckles, then leans down to kiss you. This kiss is lighter, no longer edged with tension and lust. He kisses you just to kiss you–there’s no end goal to it this time.

“What could be better than a BMW?” You tease lightly, trying to reassure him that you’re less disappointed than you really feel.

“You know. Something romantic. A proper bed, rose petals, maybe a few candles…”

“I don’t need all that,” you try to tell him.

“I think I do,” he admits. And that’s enough to pull you back, to remind you that you need to be patient and grateful that he values you so much as to want to do this whole thing properly. That his affection is something to be cherished, not taken for granted.

“I’m sorry,” you whisper. “I didn’t mean to be pushy.”

“Please don’t apologize.” He hesitates to untangle himself from you, even though he knows he needs to. “I want this just as bad. I just… I need it to be right.”

“As long as I have you, it’ll be right,” you reassure. “I hope you know that.”

He presses his lips to yours again, a slow and passionate kiss that he hopes communicates every bit of adoration he feels for you in this moment.

“It’ll be perfect. I swear,” he vows. You’ve never believed anything more whole-heartedly than you do this promise.

~~~

“Wait, you’re telling me that you literally had her under you and you stopped?” Robin’s halfway through chewing a mouthful of popcorn and the absolute carnage inside her agape mouth makes Steve give her a light shove.

“It’s not polite to talk with your mouth full, y’know.”

“It’s not polite to blue-ball either!” She shoots back in utter disbelief.

“How do you think I felt? I was this close,” he holds his thumb and index finger barely millimeters apart, “to sealing the deal.”

She just shakes her head. “You, Steve Harrington, are a genuine, bonafide idiot.”

She’s not telling him anything he doesn’t know. It’s been three days since the aborted fling in the backseat of his car, and he’s barely thought of anything else. Especially since you’ve been away from home both of the past nights when he’s called. He’s starting to worry you’ve gotten the wrong impression, that he’s not interested or that he’s toying with you. It’s the exact opposite. He wants nothing more than to know you in the most intimate way he can know you. But he needs it to be flawless. He needs it to be well thought-out and precisely planned, the most romantic event in the history of copulation. He won’t settle for anything less, not with you. You deserve perfection, and he won’t give you anything less.

“It’s not that I don’t want to,” he tries to explain. “I want to more than anything. But if you’re gonna go to town on a goddess, you need to do some worshiping, y’know? I don’t feel like I’ve done enough.”

Your heart pounds in your chest as you hear this admission. You weren’t sure what to expect–worried that maybe visiting him at work was an overstep–but hearing him call you a goddess certainly wasn’t on your radar.

“You’ve done more than enough, Steve.”

The sound of your voice makes Steve jump and whirl around, oblivious to Robin’s sly smirk and mumbled excuse of needing to attend to something in the back room.

“H-hey!” He squeaks, then clears his throat in an attempt to get his tone back to its normal octave. “What… what’re you doing here?”

“Oh, just came to pick up a tape,” you tease. “But mostly I came to see you.”

“Me?” He takes a moment to ground himself, loosening his too-tight grip on the counter. “I mean… I tried to call you last night. And the night before?”

Your brow furrows. “Really? I didn’t get your message.”

Because he didn’t leave one. He clears his throat and says, “I just figured you were busy.”

“Oh, well, I volunteer at the animal shelter on Wednesdays, and last night was my friend’s 21st birthday. I’m sorry I missed you, though.”

He can tell that you’re really remorseful, and it makes his heart squeeze in his chest a little bit. He plays it off with a dismissive wave of his hand. “No, it’s fine, it’s… are you free tonight?”

You giggle at the abrupt redirect, but he’s played directly into your hand.

“Yeah, actually. I was hoping maybe you could help me pick out something for us to watch tonight? If you’re free too, that is.”

His dark eyes blink slowly, wondering if you’re aware of the implication behind your completely innocent words. You. Him. A movie. Alone. It’s enough to make his head spin.

“I’ve never been freer.”

Conveniently, you’ve come in close enough to the end of his shift that by the time you’re done combing through Family Video’s vast selection for the perfect film to use as background noise, Steve’s ready to clock out. And since you walked over after finishing your own shift at the local dollar store up the street, it works out perfectly that he can give you a ride straight to his place.

You only glance in the backseat once, but it’s enough to get your mind churning. Remembering the feeling of him, of what could’ve been. Anticipating what will be.

“Parents home?” You ask as he pulls into his driveway and parks, trying to sound casual and utterly failing.

“Nope,” he answers easily. “Took a detour to Cabo on their way home from Hawaii.”

“Sounds glamorous. You opted out?”

“I’d rather be here in Hawkins with you than on a beach alone anyday.”

He must know the effect his words have on you. Surely he can hear the way your heart picks up pace as he looks at you with those dark, affectionate eyes.

“So… this is home.” He waves a hand around the entrance hall like it’s a shabby nightmare, not the grandest house you’ve ever been in.

“I’m starting to understand why they used to call you King Steve.”

He’s almost embarrassed at the mention of that old high school nickname. “Trust me, this isn’t why.”

“Well, a palace does befit you,” you tell him with a smirk.

“Stop, you’re gonna make me blush.” The wink he shoots you makes your gut erupt with butterflies, a sensation that would normally make you a little uncomfortable. With Steve, you’d take the butterflies all day long.

He gives you a cursory and oversimplified tour of the ground floor before leading you upstairs, and suddenly he’s sheepish. It’s been a few moons since he shared his room with a girl, so the nerves are justified. But that’s too simple an explanation. You’re not a girl. You’re his dream, his muse, his–to re-quote himself–goddess. No one he’s ever cared about more has stood where you’re standing, and it terrifies him.

He hides it well, though, busying himself with making a comfortable nest for you in his bed before setting up the television set on the dresser against the far wall. If ever there was a time to regain his confidence, it’s now. He curses whatever god there is that he feels like a fumbling virgin in this moment when nothing is even happening, when just the anticipation is enough to make his hands tremble.

There’s no more stalling once you’re comfortable and the tape is set to play. His heart pounds to the steady and frantic rhythm of one of those heavy rock songs Dustin listens to now as he sits next to you, hands itching to take a hold of you but also eager not to move too fast.

Almost as if you can sense his hesitation, you reach over and take his hand. “Steve?”

“Yeah?”

“Kiss me.”

And so he does, and the second his lips slot to yours all the worry and anxiety is gone. He’s Steve Harrington, and he knows what he’s doing. You’re you, and he’s wanted this for so long. After years of being lost, he deserves to finally find the love he’s been looking for. He’s never been so sure of anything as he is, in this moment of initial clarity, that he’s in love with you.

He can’t say it, not yet. He’s sure it’s too soon, and the last thing he wants is to scare you off. But he’s determined to prove it to you, and the only way besides words is action.

He can handle action.

There’s no more restraint or hesitation behind his touch. This is it, this is what you’ve both been waiting for. There’s no way in hell he’s not going to deliver now. He’s desperate for you, and it shows in the heavy way his hands drag along your curves whilst committing you to memory; the way his tongue languidly swipes across your bottom lip; the way he shifts effortlessly to hover over you even while deepening the kiss.

He’s overwhelming every single sense of yours in such a sudden fashion, and you wouldn’t want it any other way. Especially not when his hips meet yours in a deliciously slow grind and you finally get your first little taste of what’s to come.

He keens at the little breathless whimpers that leave your mouth, reading every single signal you provide him with and accommodating each. Moaning? He continues what he’s doing, intensifying if deemed necessary. Whining? He adds something, because he knows it’s hard to use your words when you’re wanting so badly. Squirming? He pays attention to the direction of your movement and pulls away or presses closer depending on necessity. It’s down to science for him; he only really cared about extracurriculars in school anyway, and this was certainly his favorite.

But then he comes to his senses–while he doesn’t pull away completely, he needs to clear his mind and he does so by letting up a bit, allowing the kiss to become languid and the heat to extinguish a bit. It only makes you whine more, and Steve curses his damned formula. You shouldn’t be part of an equation. You’re everything he’s ever wanted, and every aspect of your relationship so far has been a new experience for him. He needs this particular activity to be different too. No formulas or calculations. Just you and him and whatever happens naturally.

Clearly you can hear the cogs in his mind turning. You pull away with a concerned look on your face and ask, “what’s on your mind?”

Now’s not the time to hide anything from you, he reasons with himself. He wants to be authentic with you, and part of that means telling the truth, even if it’s not something particularly comfortable.

“I’m… falling into a routine. And I don’t want to,” he admits. He sighs and leans back, one hand dragging through his shaggy and disheveled hair, sure that he’s going to ruin the mood if he carries on like this. But he refuses to back away from the truth now. “This… it’s always been like…. Like a series of checkpoints. Boxes to check, y’know? Kiss you, take your clothes off, make you come, fuck you, say goodnight. And I don’t want… I can’t let it be like that with you. I need this to be… real. Not just some list to cross shit off of. I don’t–”

Steve takes a long, shaky breath before he can ramble on anymore. Never has someone so thoroughly gotten under his skin. He’s never felt so insecure, so unsure. It’s terrifying. The most terrifying part of it all, though, is that he likes it. He loves the feeling of the unfamiliarity, of doing this right. In a way, it’s almost like he’s doing all of this for the first time all over again. You’re his first date, first kiss, first time. All because he’s changed so drastically, because he’s not even remotely the same person he was just a year or two ago.

Your hands are so gentle as you cup his face, tenderly forcing his eyes to meet yours.

“Steve… we don’t have to do this, not if you’re not ready. I want to be with you, not just for this, but for everything. Everything that comes with you… that’s what I want. There’s no pressure. I would wait a hundred years for you to be ready so long as I could still have you.”

Steve’s breath shakes a little as he comprehends the gravity of your words. There’s nothing he can say that can properly convey the gratitude he holds for your words, so he says nothing at all.

In his silence, you continue. “You’re more than a body, you know that, right? You’re funny, and kind, and smart. Yes, smart, don’t look at me like that. You’re everything I’ve ever wanted to be close to. I just… I want to spend time with you. I want to watch stupid movies and eat diner food until we get sick and laugh at your stupid jokes… and maybe make love with you, sure, but that’s pretty low on the list as long as I just get to be with you.”

He doesn’t notice the tears until it’s too late–by the time you’re wiping them from the apples of his cheeks it’s far too late to take them back or hide them. With anyone else, he would be angry; at himself, for allowing himself to be so vulnerable. For allowing himself to be so emotional. With you, though… with you, his emotions make him feel strong.

For the first time since you walked into his life, he’s not scared of losing you.

“I love you,” he tells you. His voice is firm, as fierce as the kiss he presses to your mouth, as powerful as the waves of emotion vibrating through his very soul. “I love you so much.”

He barely gives you a chance to reply, as keen as he is on physically proving his love to you through myriad passionate kisses that leave you breathless. But when you finally get the chance to use your voice after a barrage of kisses that start to trail down your neck, you whisper, “I love you too.”

Four words, and they’re all he needs to quell every worry or fear he’s had over doing this relationship properly with you. Why should he have to worry, after all, when he’s already succeeded?

“I love you,” he whispers as he trails down your neck and to your chest, leaving tender love bites on the tops of your breasts once he’s properly liberated you from your shirt.

“I love you,” he mumbles through sucking a mark a few inches north of your navel.

“I love you,” he murmurs when his lips meet your waistband. His fingers make quick work of your pants as he scatters kisses over your stomach, unable to part his mouth from your skin for even a moment.

“I love you,” he affirms as his mouth meets your hot and waiting core.

There’s no more checklist. Because this isn’t simply sex, as it always has been for him in the past. This is love-making: the kind of sappy shit they talk about in all those Hallmark movies that he rolls his eyes at the sight of. It’s like losing his virginity all over again.

He understands the old adage of “the other half” now. You’ve ripped him to shreds and sewed him back together with strands of yourself. The end result is better than the original ever could’ve even dreamed to be. He’s sure he couldn’t possibly live without you now, that losing you would be like ripping out fresh and unhealed stitches.

You’re not sure how long he camps out between your trembling thighs, but it’s long enough for you to lose count of the number of times he pulls you apart–first with his languid tongue; then his long, curved fingers; then a combination of the two. It’s like he loses himself completely in your pleasure, not a single thought in his head except what he can do to bring you to the edge again, and again, and again.

You’re trembling with oversensitivity by the time his own needs overtakes his desperation to unravel you. So out of it that you feel drunk, like Steve’s laced you with absolute bliss so pure you can barely stand it.

You’re hardly present enough to appreciate the adonis before you when he finally undoes his own jeans, and that’s a damned shame because he’s so damned pretty. Long and thick, flushed at the girthy tip from his hitherto unacknowledged arousal. His lean thighs are pure muscle, and the dark thatch of hair that trails south from his navel makes your mouth water. He’s everything you dreamed he’d be and so much more.

“Steve…” You don’t know what else you can possibly say. All you can do is vainly hope that one whine of his name can convey all of the heat, frustration, tension, and above all longing, swirling through your head in the moment.

He breaks from his lustful reverie for a moment to smile as he leans in for another heated kiss; you think it’s safe to say you’ve gotten your point across.

He slows from his mania for a few moments, lips tender as they explore against yours once more. These kisses are languid, slow, yet no less heated. Even now, he’s trying to prove his love to you. As if you could somehow not believe him after everything that’s happened, every small moment you’ve spent with him witnessing how hard he’s trying for you.

Somewhere in between kisses he manages to wrestle a condom out of his nightstand, miraculously without ever breaking from your lips.

Now is where you cut in, finally fading out of your over-pleasured fugue and back to reality. You take the little foil packet from his hands and tear it open, eager for this small chance to finally get a hand or two on him.

He lets out the most gorgeous noise you’ve ever heard as you roll the rubber down his length; a deep, earthy, diaphragmatic moan just from the simple touch of your hand. You want to touch him even more, to wrest out more of those sounds from him; to see what other undiscovered responses you can pull from him as you pleasure him. But you know that now, he needs to set the pace. He believes he has something to prove, and you’re more than happy to let him prove it. There will be plenty of other opportunities to have him completely at your mercy, anyway.

There’s no way to describe the feeling as he slides into you. It’s more than bliss, more than euphoria, more than earth-shattering toe-curling mind-altering pleasure. It’s nothing more than feeling whole. Of never knowing you were missing a part of yourself until it’s suddenly returned to you. Of never knowing what home felt like until this exact moment.

Maybe it’s overdramatic. Maybe it’s outlandish and outrageous and a million other adjectives to feel something so overpowering and overwhelming from such a seemingly simple physical act. But in this moment, you know you’ve never felt anything as right as being connected to Steve in this way.

His lips hardly leave yours while he rolls his hips against you, easily finding the perfect angle to make your breath hitch and your hands scrabble for purpose.

It admittedly doesn’t last long, but it doesn’t have to. Once you start to tighten and pulse around him, he’s a goner–deep purposeful thrusts turning to hard, arrhythmic plunges in desperate search of release.

You’re still shaking from your high when he slowly pulls out of you. He keeps you close, arms linked around your waist and dragging you to lay on his chest as he flops back against the pillows.

You’re not sure how long you lay like that, with Steve whispering sweet nothings into your hair and pressing absentminded kisses to your face. All you can really focus on is one all-consuming, life-changing fact.

“I love you, Steve Harrington.”

“I love you too,” he whispers back. He kisses you again, just a simple peck on your lips, and you know that he’s telling the truth. It’s an eternal truth: one that can’t be changed or altered in any way. Steve Harrington loves you with every fibre of his being, and he will for the rest of his life–even if you’re both blissfully unaware of it for now.

THE END

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thebestofoneshots · 4 months

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Gilded Constellations | (wolfstar x reader)

Series Masterlist | Previous episode

Pairing: Wolfstar x Reader Word Count: 7.3 K Warnings: Graphic descriptions of violence. (Reader discretion is advised). Prompt: It's the night of the prank This IS a wolfstar x reader fic, but it's incredibly slow burn. They won't start all dating each other until we're very deep into the story, but I promise the long wait will be worth it.

Chapter 28: If You Want BIood (You’ve Got It)

You were walking through the dark halls, wand raised with a lumus charm so you could see better. You already knew the path you had to follow, it was almost exactly the same one that you used to get to the fireworms but a little further and then 3 lefts and 2 rights.

You wouldn’t say you’d pride yourself on your sense of direction, you had gotten lost in the castle more than once, but you had been in the passageways so often, and you had explored them and gotten lost in them just as many times. You had already taken three lefts and were about to take a right when Sirius appeared in front of you.

“Oh hey–“ You started, but were cut off by the way he scooped you into his arms, hugging you tightly, he leaned his head on the crook of your neck.

“Missed you,” he whispered into your hair.

You frowned, what’s gotten into him? “I saw you in the morning.”

“But you sat far away,” he whined. You frowned but finally hugged him back. It’s not that you didn’t like when Sirius was clingy, in fact, you loved it. But most of the time he got clingy it was because something was up.

Could it be because of your wound? But he had known about it for a week, and he hadn’t been this clingy earlier. In fact, he’d been a lot more concerned and serious about it. Yeah worried, and definitely a little touchy when you fell asleep on his bed, but not clingy. You noticed he was still nozzled in your neck after a couple of minutes, and felt how he took a deep breath “Are you smelling me?” you asked in disbelief, a teasing smile slowly creeping up your mouth.

He pulled away, a sly little smile on his lip. Am I really the one that’s a fox? You wondered as his smile widened to a grin, “Got a problem with it trésor?”

You almost rolled your eyes, you had let it slip that you liked it when he spoke French to you and he was making a conscious effort to fluster you about it whenever he had the chance. “Non, mon coquin,” you replied with a little smirk.

He gasped “Take that back!”

“Is it not accurate?” you teased again.

“Oi! I swear if you–“

“Everything all right?” You heard Remus’ conciliating voice from behind.

“She called me coquin!” Sirius complained with a pout. Looking an awful lot like a small child.

He looks adorable, both you and Remus thought.

“So?” Remus asked, he did not speak much French.

You giggled and placed your hand on his shoulder, he leaned towards you “It means rascal, naughty or… mischief.”

Remus nodded and turned back to Sirius. “I’d say it’s accurate,” he said with a shrug.

You covered your mouth with your hands and attempted to hold back a laugh. “Moony!” Sirius complained, “don’t back her up! I was trying to be cute-“

You shook your head, “–he was trying to fluster me.”

Remus wasn’t sure what he was doing in the middle of such a silly discussion, but since both you and Sirius looked absolutely adorable, he wasn’t sure he cared too much “How come?”

“I called her trésor.” Remus looked at him expectantly. “It means treasure,” Sirius clarified.

Well, that one’s accurate as well, he thought before he spoke again “Well you’re both mo chailleachan àlainn.” He placed both arms over your and Sirius’ shoulders and prompted you to continue your way.

“Hold up! You’re back at it with the Gaelic?”

“That was Gaelic?” Sirius asked, “No wonder I understood shit.”

Remus shrugged and then with a cheeky little smile responded “You understood it perfectly then.”

Sirius gasped again, turning to Remus just a little, “You wouldn’t dare!”

“Wouldn’t I?” He asked again, pulling Sirius’ shoulder so he would turn back to the front. You just laughed.

“Yeah chachan àlain,” you mocked. Remus laughed at your miserable attempt to speak Gaelic.

“If I’m a chaillchan àlainn so are you!” Sirius argued. “He said it to the both of us.”

Remus sniggered “Indeed, you’re both my chailleachan àlainn,” the way the words rolled off his tongue made it sound as sexy as Sirius’ french.

You elbowed him, and he played hurt. But his fun lasted until the three of you fell into a comfortable silence and his mind started to wonder. Reprimanding himself for calling you what he had, had either of them actually understood, he thought. Of course, Remus knew neither spoke Gaelic, but sometimes words were similar and both you and Sirius spoke like 5 different languages in between each other. He had been stupid.

And more stupid than that, he was just casually hugging the two of you as you walked, not that either seemed to mind. Sirius had a bit of a frown but that was because he thought he’d been called a “shit”, you on the other hand, had a diverted look on your face as you leaned slightly into Remus’ shoulder, clearly pleased over the fact that he had sided with you. But he felt too content, too joyful, it felt –even if it was just for a second– like he could have the two of you, and that you’d be happy to have him as well.

He felt like it was the Halloween Party all over again and you both had your hands all over him, no restrictions attached, the three of you high to the heavens with that euphoric potion. Yes, it was delightful, but at the same time, it was torment. Torment because he knew he couldn’t just give in to his delusional fantasies, torment because he knew there was a limit to how close he could be to the two of you before either noticed, torment because his mind kept telling him to get away. Still, his body refused, refused to let go, refused to stop feeling your warmth. And he had been the one to place himself in that situation this time around. Perhaps, it was he who was the cailleachan in the end.

Either way, he didn’t step away, he knew it would be more suspicious if he did, so he kept his arms around yours and Sirius’ shoulders, careful not to touch the section he had scratched.

“Took you long enough,” the three of you heard Prongs’ voice once you arrived at the meeting point.

“They were having a domestic fight.”

You gasped at that, “It was a small quarrel.”

“No, it wasn’t! You called me a–“

“But you are a…“

“–Guys?” you heard Peter’s voice rise a little as he tried to gather everyone’s attention, interrupting the two of you “Can we discuss your quarrels later on? We don’t have all night.”

“It wasn’t a quarrel,” Sirius muttered to himself. Remus had already stepped away from the two as he went to talk to James and you closed the gap between you and your boyfriend, extending your hand to chase his.

“Hey mischief?” you said, trying to get his attention. He gave you a side look. You leaned your head on his shoulder. “You did hear what I said, right?” He turned his head to you, eyebrows raised like, telling you with his face that he most definitely had, “Yeah, but did you really listen?”

“Yes, it was very clear when you called me coquin.”

You shook your head and leaned into him, to be able to whisper in his ear “I called you mon coquin.”

He turned to you with agape, a silent scoff rolling off his pretty lips. “Oh, so now you’re claiming ownership over me,” he teased, a smile plastered on his face.

“Well, if the shoe fits…” you replied, mirroring his smile.

He pulled you closer to him, brushing his lips against your earlobe before he spoke “Est-ce que ça fait de toi mon trésor?”

Your mouth went dry and you shivered, bIood rushing through your cheeks so fast you weren’t sure you’d be able to play it cool afterwards. Regardless you tried, leaning in closer to his own ear and actually biting his earlobe before speaking again. “Je peux être tout ce que tu veux que je sois…”

“Love puppies, time to focus, please,” James said when he noticed the way Sirius’ eyes had shone. He may or may not have been afraid of what the two of you would have done if he hadn’t stopped you.

You turned to James with a smile and nodded. Remus had averted his gaze, your back was to him, so you didn’t notice, but Sirius did, and he almost felt a pang in his chest when he realised Remus’ slightly bitter reaction. Well, he had felt the pang, but he pretended like he hadn’t. It made no sense for it to be there. You were his girlfriend and Remus was just Remus. Same Remus he’d always been, except that he wasn’t making him feel the same way he always had. His hand settled on your back as the two of you walked closer to Peter, who had the map in a hold.

“So, I’ll get in first and eavesdrop on the password. That way we know what it is. Then the four of you will get in through the door with the cloak on.”

“We won’t fit,” Remus said, remembering how close he had stood to Sirius in the library the previous night.

“Yeah, we thought about that yesterday while you were making the potions,” James spoke and then turned to you “You’re gonna have to turn into Vixen and let us carry you.”

You looked at James for a second, blinking as you processed the information, and then shrugged. “Okay, just be careful when you pick me up.”

James nodded in response, and Peter continued speaking. “Great, once we’re in, we’ll just sneak into their dorms and we’ll help you and Remus with the hex bags.”

“We’re not going to get anyone that’s not on the list,” you said as you looked at them, it was something between a question and a statement. You just wanted them to confirm it. Everyone nodded, except for Sirius, who looked a bit vexed. You threw him a look. “I have friends in Slytherin, you have friends in Slytherin. We can’t punish them all just because of a few assholes are in the same house.”

“They’ve been messing with you since you got here, Starshine.”

“Yes!” you agreed. “A small little group of them have. Not every single one.”

He looked to the side but eventually nodded , “Fine then. Just them.”

“Such a good boy,” Peter teased, in the same tone you’d use for a dog and Sirius almost hexed him. Which just had you all laugh.

“Everyone’s against me tonight,” he complained.

“I’m not,” James said as he placed an arm over Sirius, you gave Remus a diverted little smile, and he returned it with a bit of a shrug. “You’re our best boy after all,” James said, using the same tone Peter had used earlier, and making the rest of you laugh.

Sirius looked at James shocked, like he had been betrayed by his friend. He then removed James’ arm from his shoulders and lagged behind until he was beside you, you leaned towards him a little. “It’s all right Puppy, I’ll make it up to you later.”

He gave you a coquettish little smirk, “You promise?”

You almost rolled your eyes at his lightning-fast change of behaviour, he had never even been actually upset, but decided to humour him instead “Oui, mon amour.”

“I understood that!” James said teasingly.

You just chuckled, “As if it were a secret.”

Sirius’s smile widened. Yes, that was right, he was your love.

Once you reached the end of the passage, just a few metres away from the entrance to the Slytherin Common Room Peter shrunk into Wormtail and disappeared through the door. You looked at him go, still fascinated by how the animgus transformation was so seamless. Yes, you were one yourself, but it’s not like you’d ever seen yourself transform. It had never even occurred to you that the process would be so interesting.

And you were also thinking of how different it was to Remus’ transformation. His was painful, at least you assumed that it was since it had seemed pretty bad when he transformed back in the shack. You still remembered the way he’d yelped and bawled as his skin ripped and gave away to the wolf. The memory caused a shiver to run down your spine.

“You cold?” you heard Remus whisper after he leaned towards you. You all had to be a lot more quiet now that you were close to the Slytherin common room. But the three of you had sat down in the hallway. You were on one side, with Sirius and Remus on each of your side, and James was in front of the three of you, Sirius had been leaning towards the front to be able to talk to him.

“Me?” you asked as you turned to Rem. “No, no. It was more of a… It was just… nervousness,” you lied in the end.

“You’re nervous?” he asked with a bit of a frown, emphasising the “you” as if he didn’t believe it was possible.

“Well, I’ve never sneaked into someone else's dorms to cause havoc,” you argued, digging yourself deeper into your lie. “It’s only natural that I would-“

He shook his head, “That’s not it. I know you, Miss Let’s Add The 100-year-old Veom Instead.”

Sometimes it was annoying how well Remus could read you. You sighed, “well, I’m not nervous, but I’m not cold either. Let’s leave it at that?” He tilted his head to the side as if analysing the situation before nodding, you pulled your feet towards your chest and rested your head over your knees. “You think he’ll take much longer?”

“He has to wait for most of them to be asleep. We can’t risk the door opening up and having no one get in.”

“We should have just gotten Slytherin ties and walked inside like we were part of them…” you huffed.

Remus chuckled “As if the entire school didn’t already know the faces and names of three of the Gryffindor Quidditch Players.”

“Polyjuice potion?”

“And you just have that one around?”

“Well, we made a pretty good one with Slughorn at the beginning of the year...”

“Maybe we should have kept some of it in a vase before handing it over.”

“I did,” you said casually.

Remus looked eyebrows shot upwards as he looked at you, trying to decide if you were joking or not, “You did?!?”

You nodded, “it’s safe and sound on my trunk, in case we ever need it.”

Remus had opened his mouth to speak again when you saw Wormtail returning through the small hole in the wall. He quickly turned, he was still crouching when he turned back, his teeth slowly shrinking to their normal size, which was already a little big for his face.

“It’s emerald enigma,” he whispered, loud enough for the four of you to listen.

You raised your eyebrow, “emerald enigma? really?!?”

“Slytherins aren’t ever particularly clever with their passwords,” James said.

“Once upon a time it was clever schemes,” Sirius said as he turned to you.

You looked at him even more shocked and Remus nodded beside the two of you.

“Time to go then,” James said. Peter was a rat in seconds, and then it was your turn. Just seconds afterwards, you had already turned into your own animagus form and walked towards Sirius’ lap. It’s not that you were certain he’d be the one carrying you, but it made sense.

“Hey Kit,” he said softly as he allowed you to climb over one of his legs and then wrapped his hand under your belly, picking you up as he stood, and then placing his other arm underneath so you felt more secure. You leaned your head on his chest and paid attention to the reaction of the boys. Remus was wrapping the cloak around James and Sirius, while James had leaned closer to you and was staring at you from the side.

James had never seen a fox up close, well he had seen you back at the full moon but it wasn’t the same thing. He seemed genuinely interested, but when he extended his hand to touch you, Sirius pulled back protectively, accidentally crashing into Remus. “Oi!” James complained as he stared.

“She’s still hurt,” Sirius said defensively.

“But she likes to be rubbed behind the ear,” offered Remus.

Sirius nodded, the fact that Remus knew, or how he knew, didn’t even cross his mind. James looked directly at you “May I?”

You didn’t hiss, or emit any other protest sound, so he leaned his hand again, staring at Sirius for permission. Your boyfriend nodded, a little apprehensive still and James pressed his hand onto your head. He was soft, like he was with cats, but then he scratched you the same way Padfoot liked being scratched and all of your hair stood on end.

Involuntarily you turned your head towards him and opened your mouth to bite, your snout was already around his wrist when you realised what you were doing and pulled back, being helped by Sirius who also pulled you back. You looked at James and he had an apologetic look in his face, you too looked like you were sorry for trying to bite him.

“Sorry,” the boy whispered, you nodded and that was that. James did not try to pet you again, at least not for a while, he’d seen how sharp your teeth were.

Remus finished arranging the cloak around the three of them Sirius and you had ended up in the middle, James and Remus on each side, they were all standing pretty close to each other as the three walked outside of the hideout and towards the dungeons. You saw the potions classroom, the boys passed by it as you stared around carefully, as a fox your senses were a lot better than theirs, except perhaps for Remus’ so you kept a close eye on the boy in case either you or him, heard something that would require you to warn them about something.

Eventually, you reached the bare wall that would lead you to the Slytherin Dorms, you felt excitement piling up in the form of a knot in your stomach. You’d wanted to see their dorm for a while now. You had already seen the Ravenclaw and yours, obviously, and for some reason, the goal to sneak into all the different common rooms prowled into your head.

“Emerald Enigma,” James whispered towards the door and slowly the bricks from the wall started moving and opening into a relatively long passageway. The four of you stared ahead, paying close attention to the way the bricks moved and stepped forward as soon as they could comfortably fit through the door. The passageway opened into a rather long room, the ceiling was clearly very high above you, making the place feel almost nothing like the dungeons. In fact, you’d go as far as to say that it felt more like a palace since it was rather regal. The windows were looking straight to the black lake, with a few water creatures passing swiftly through them every now and then, it looked rather peaceful, which you wouldn’t have ever imagined the dungeons to be.

The boys, who had to actually pay attention to where they were going, and who clearly had been there before, weren’t as awed as you were, in fact, they looked a lot more on edge, as they were checking all around the common room to make sure it was empty. Still, Remus and James continued to hold the cloak tightly, to make sure it wouldn’t fall, tumble or get caught into something.

Once they were sure it was mostly empty, Remus removed the cloak from atop of you, and Sirius laid you gently on the ground. You turned back in a matter of seconds. “The boy’s dorms are to the left,” Sirius informed. “Barty’s number 15, he’s with Regulus.”

“Evan, Snape and Mulciber are on the 24th,” you said. Sirius turned to you with a frown, as if asking how you knew, you shrugged, “I got it from Minho.”

Sirius’ frown deepened “You asked him?”

“Of course I didn’t straight up ask him, It’d be too suspicious, although I’m sure Minho wouldn’t rat us out.” On purpose, you thought, after all, he had been the reason you concluded Remus was probably bi, or maybe pan.

“So how?”

“A magician never reveals her secrets,” you said with a sly smile. It really hadn’t been a particularly smart conversation that you’d had. You just mentioned that Mary was telling you about the power of numbers and that she thought our room numbers had significance. It was partially true, at least she did talk to you about the power of numbers, after divination a couple of weeks ago. You then told Minho your room number and the boys and he started sharing all of the Slytherin ones you knew.

He hummed in response, “Fine then, we split.”

“That’s the worst idea ever.”

“No, it’d be faster,” James added.

“You’ve never seen a horror movie, have you?”

Remus smiled, he understood exactly what you were referring to, and then leaned a little closer to you. “Don’t worry, you’re already hanging out with the most dangerous monster in the castle,” he joked.

You turned to him, almost a little surprised by his statement, “Who knows, maybe there are vampires hidden somewhere, or acromantulas, or basilisks, or magical armours that want to cut you in half.”

“You need to tone it down with the fantasy books Vixen,” James said with a teasing smile, “you and Sirius go to Barty’s. We’ll go to Snivellus', Peter, look out. Deal?”

You huffed, but nodded, “Keep the cloak,” you said before casting a disillusionment over yourself and Sirius. Remus, who had heard from Sirius how good your charm was, was still somewhat shocked by it. It really was almost as good as James' invisibility cloak, unless he paid really, really close attention.

“Damn she’s–“

“Really fucking good, I know!” Sirius finished. You handed a small bag to Remus, who took it as it slowly became visible.

“I’ve kept what I’ll need, use the rest,” you told him, and finally split ways. You and Sirius moved to Barty’s room.

“Alohomora,” he whispered, along with a silencing charm so the door wouldn’t creak. Four boys were soundly sleeping on each of their beds. The first one you spotted was someone you instantly recognized and you gasped, covering your mouth when you realised you had been a bit too loud.

Sirius threw you a look and walked closer, “It’s Nox,” you whispered, the muffliato you had used earlier helping you be as stealthy as possible, “from the reading club, didn’t know he was Barty’s roommate. He hangs out with Neil and Todd most of the time.”

It’s not like Srius didn’t know you had friends other than your friend group, but it was sometimes weird that you knew people in the castle he barely even recognized. “Want me to add a ward around him?”

You thought about it for a second, and nodded “We really should,” you said “I don’t want the prank to affect him…”

“What about the rest?”

You turned around, there was a silver-blond haired boy who you didn’t actually recognize, Sirius leaned closer to you and pointed at the boy, “Solacis Gaunt, he’s close to Reg and Barty,” he said as he pointed.

“Gaunt as in…?” You turned to him, in disbelief.

“Yeah…”

You bit your lip, even if this Solacis was friends with Barty and his group, he hadn’t been there that night, and you had no idea how he would have reacted, and regarding his last name, well you refused to believe that was any sign of people’s character. After all, you being who you were and Sirius being who he was, had never actually altered your actual selves… What’s in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet, you remembered. “We’ll ward him too.”

“And Regulus?” he asked, you could see the apprehension in his voice. You turned to the boy, last time you saw him he had tried to approach you in a friendly manner and you’d blown him off. Being asleep he looked so unguarded, so little preoccupied as his chest rose up and down, you almost felt bad for the way you had treated him. But then you remembered what he had done and the anger boiled back up to your chest. He had knowingly betrayed you and Sirius, all those lost years…

You had two hex bags, you could easily slip one under his pillow as well, have him suffer the fright of his life, bring him down to desperate cries, overpowered, helpless. But Regulus had stayed on the sidelines, he had tried to stay out of your way since that time at the race when you basically told him to piss off. It was like he had been trying to make you less uncomfortable, even if it pained him, not that you knew. But you did notice that you saw him around a lot less, he avoided you, and even if he did stare at you and Sirius from the sidelines, he never even dared to accidentally cross paths. That you had noticed.

And laying there, his head resting on his pillow, his hair pulled back revealing his delicate features, he looked every bit a Black, every bit like his brother. You took a deep breath, it was in his graceful nose, in his long dark lashes, in his thin, pinky lips. All of those features that drew you to Sirius, the things that made your boyfriend as beguiling as a Siren’s call. They really are brothers, you thought. And how? How would you be able to hurt him? What he did had been years ago, and he had been a kid too, pressured by his parents. It’s not that you wanted to be friends again, but you didn’t want to cause him sorrow either. “He’ll too be warded off.”

Sirius frowned, “But after what…”

You turned to him, your dark expression clearly telling him you knew exactly what he had done, even if he could barely see it due to your spell. “He was not there that night. He didn’t do this to me,” you said, pointing to your wound, “this isn’t about some old grudge we have against him, this about Monday. This about what happened that night and the people that allowed this bastard to do it,” you said, giving Crouch a short glance “And Sirius, he is your brother.”

He swallowed, “He’s a Black.” Every bit a Black, you recalled your earlier thought. You also wondered how such a messed up gene pool could make such beautiful children.

“You are one too,” you whispered as you walked closer, “and I still, I lo- like you very much. Every bit of you,” you added in the end and pressed a few kisses to his face for good measure, perhaps he would have missed the slip of your tongue. Not that you didn’t mean it, but you wouldn’t expect Sirius to comprehend it, you’d barely been dating for a few months. “You’re still my Puppy, no matter what last name you have.”

Sirius gave you one long look and smiled when you kissed his nose, placing both hands around your face to bring your lips to his, he had heard the slip of your tongue, and it only made him want to kiss you even more. When you finally separated for air, he was the first one to speak. “I’m gonna have to kiss you again if you keep it up with the sappy stuff,” he joked.

You raised your eyebrows at that and then placed your finger over his lips, “You have a terrible habit of kissing me in the middle of stealth missions.”

“What do you mean I have the– You’re literally the one that starts it!” he added with an accusing finger.

“Yeah but you always kiss back,” you shrugged.

He gave you a diverted look as he bit his lip, and leaned in again, you leaned in as well, but he stopped right before your lips crashed against each other and smirked, “yeah, I’m not the only one who’s eager to kiss back.” You pushed his chest playfully as you narrowed your eyes at him, and then you heard Nox stir on his bed. The two of you leaned down and gave each other a look.

Both realising how stupid you had been by flirting –and making out– in the middle of the room where you were supposed to place the hex bags. You gave each other a look and almost chuckled. If Remus had been here, we would have stopped us, you thought, he’s the most reasonable of this bunch. And perhaps Remus would have, but only because he wasn’t able to join you.

When Nox finally stopped, you took a deep breath and both stood again. “Warding, I’ll place this.”

Sirius nodded and the two of you started with your tasks. You walked to Barty’s bed and smirked when you realised how easy this would be. You took a deep breath and leaned over the boy. Asleep, he didn’t look as wicked as he did on a daily basis. There was no sneer on his face and he almost looked peaceful. Not for long, you thought as you bit your lip to stop yourself from chuckling. You took a deep breath and raised his pillow slightly, placing the hex bag in its place. Then you looked at the leftover bag and decided to place it under his pillow as well. You shrugged, the more the merrier.

He instantly stirred on the bed, a small frown appearing on his face as his breath quickened. Let's see how you liked being scared, you thought and turned to Sirius. He was just finishing with his castings. He gave you a questioning look and you nodded, the two of you slid out of the bedroom as soon as possible. As you got out you spotted James and Remus just below the stairs, giving you questioning looks.

“What the hell took you so long?” James asked, “I thought there was only Barty there.”

“We had a bit of a pitfall, but we did it.” Sirius responded.

Yeah, making out is definitely a pitfall, you thought.

“We’re ready to go then?” Peter asked, he looked rather nervous.

Remus nodded, “We just have to make sure Jackdaw does his…”

At that moment, from all the different walls, ghosts started sliding in, you smiled, Richie had actually convinced them. He approached your group with a smile, “You owe them some rotten meat,” he informed.

“Rotten meat, that’s all it took? Should’ve told me sooner, I’ll take you all the rotten food you want,” you replied. He gave you a wink and flew towards the rest of the ghosts. Sirius frowned at the flirty wink from Jackdaw but didn’t say a thing.

“Job’s done kiddos,” James said, and Remus pulled the cloak out. All of you stifled inside and walked together until you were away from prying eyes. You all knew it wouldn’t be a good idea to turn into your animagus in front of the ghosts. The muggle saying “silent as the dеad” couldn’t be further from the truth.

Once you were in the hall that led to the inside of the common room, and that both Moony and Prongs made sure there was no one watching, you and Peter turned at once. Sirius picked you up and held you in his arms, while Moony adjusted the cloak to make sure it was covering everyone up and finally, you left the common room.

That’s where things went south. Just as the bricks opened themselves again someone was walking inside. The three boys took a step to the side as Slughorn walked in. The three leaned against the wall, Sirius carefully squeezed you, or Vixen, against his chest, so you occupied as little space as possible. You noticed Peter trying to distract Slughorn by walking near his feet, but he still seemed focused on walking in, the first thing he noticed was the ghosts making their own little mess, the main distraction.

Thankfully the headless hunt was not about to be deterred by one teacher, and they continued with their task as Slughorn called for help. This wasn’t meant to be now, it should’ve been later. You turned to look at the boys, they all had apprehensive stares, you could practically smell their stress as they finally unglued their backs from the wall and started walking towards the hallway. Once in the dungeons, and away from the havoc you had caused, you thought you were safe. And perhaps you would’ve been, had Evan not been coming back from the infirmary so late.

He pretty much bumped into the invisible wall that was your three friends, and all would have been fine, except for the fact that he straight-up stepped on James’ feet and he grunted in response.

“Potter?” Evan asked, instantly recognizing his voice.

Fuck.

Evan extended his hand to grab onto the front but the boys pulled back just in time. Regardless, Evan didn’t relent, “Potter I know it’s you. Either you come the fuck out or I’ll hex your stupid rat,” he said, pulling a screeching Peter out of his pocket. James swallowed and gave each Sirius and Remus a look; you tried to jump down from Sirius’s grasp, perhaps you could distract Evan by biting him while Peter escaped, but Sirius tightened his hold as you tried to squirm away. He knew what you were thinking, but he also knew Evan could just kick you out of the way, and he was not going to risk you being hurt by his hands again.

Evan pointed his long and thin wand towards Wormtail and you felt everyone tense even more. “Come on Jamesie, you wouldn’t allow me to kill your stupid rat, would you?” he added. “How much damage do you think a confringo like the one your stupid little friend used on me earlier today would cause? Hmmm… Perhaps I could use him as target practice…” Evan tilted his head, “No?” he asked again, “well then,” he added and adjusted his wand in his hand. Peter shrieked again, “We’ll see if your stupid rat ends up better or worse than your friend after the Shrieking Shack.”

To your surprise, it wasn’t James who jumped to protect Peter, but it was Sirius. He handed you over to James who barely managed to react and grab you before he left the cloak and planted his fist on Evan’s face. Peter fell from his hands and shrieked as his face crashed onto the floor just before running off.

Evan staggered back, reeling from the sheer force of Sirius’ punch but he retaliated, shoving Sirius with eager ferocity as if he had been longing for a challenge. One where he actually won. Evan was much taller and broader than Sirius, and you squirmed in James’ arms yearning to intervene but he held you firmly, casting down an impatient glance before turning his attention back to the boys.

Evan managed to land a solid on Sirius’ jaw, but the longer-haired boy didn’t even flinch, instead he used the momentum and the loss of balance from Evan to throw himself towards his opponent, effectively managing to throw the blonde on the ground. You winced as Evan turned the two of them around and started hitting Sirius’ defenceless face.

In response to the escalating violence, James panicked –handing you over to Remus who cradled you with a lot more consideration– and he too left the cloak, leaving only you and the werewolf inside. However, Sirius had already managed to turn things around, he had started to punch Evan repeatedly in the face. James lunged forward to intervene, but he got accidentally elbowed by Sirius, who, swivelling in concern, was met with another punch from Evan.

When you figured James wouldn’t be able to stop them, you started squirming again, a lot more intensely now but Remus’ hold didn’t budge. So instead you turned back, which surprised the boy only for a second as you ended up pretty much shoved against him. You were just about to leave the cloak too when you heard a voice.

“STOOOP!” Slughorn roared.

After looking at the man using his wand to pull Sirius and Evan apart, you were ready to jump out, but Remus’ strong arms tightened around you, not letting you out. You weren’t sure if it had been intentional or not, but somehow he hadn’t touched your wound while he did.

“Remus what–“ You started to complain, but he placed his hand over your mouth and started dragging you back and away from the upheaval.

You tried to fight it, but it was useless. Remus was much more stronger than you, once you were far away enough he whispered, “It’s okay, they’re okay.” You frowned, he must have felt how tense you were, because he continued talking, voice a lot more soothing now, “if I had let you out there, you would have achieved nothing other than getting punished along with them.”

You knew he was right, and yet that didn’t reduce the urge you had to bite him for talking your agency away. You jerked your shoulders in response, still angry, feeling a sharp pain in your arm that should have calmed you down, but Evan being such an ass to Peter had made you angry enough. Hitting your boyfriend in the face? You were actually considering hexing him again, intentionally this time around. You took a deep breath, you felt Remus’ hand brushing up and down over your good arm, still attempting to relieve your anger… And as much as you hated to admit it, it was distractingly relaxing.

You tried to shake him off one last time before completely relaxing into his arms. He leaned in closer to whisper again, “Remember I was telling you about not getting caught?” He asked. And waited for you to answer. His hand was still over your mouth, you raised your eyebrows at him. He gave you a look, not moving his hand away. And eventually, you just nodded. He was smart, he knew you well too, you could have screamed, you could still see Slughorn talking to Evan and the boys from where you stood.

You could have also bit him, force him to remove his hand from your face, but you had no intention of hurting Remus. Perhaps you didn’t want to get punished along them either, the more you thought about it, the more sense it made to try and stay in the sidelines and make sure the prank was completed, even if Prongs and Pads had gotten caught.

“Well, this is one of those moments in which staying behind, and in the quiet is best,” he said softly, vocalising your own thoughts. “James and Sirius are going to get detention regardless of whether you intervene or not. Trust me, I too wanted to punch Evan in the face after he said that about the Shrieking Shack but I knew it was best to hold back. I don’t think he would’ve hurt Peter.”

You wondered if Remus had seen or heard about the way his hands had dug into your skin that day in the Forbidden Forest, about the bruises Sirius later covered up with his kisses. Even then, some of the marks still fading in your skin, you didn’t think Evan would actually hurt Peter either, in fact, you weren’t even sure he had hurt you on purpose. That’s not something you would’ve said of Barty, he was completely unhinged.

Remus was still holding you flush against his body when he took a deep breath. He had felt how much more relaxed you were now, somehow his voice and his touch had gotten you to calm down.

He shouldn’t have been surprised, it wasn’t the first time it happened, but you had been so much more rilled up this time than back when the boys threw you and Sirius from your brooms that he wasn’t even sure if you’d forgive him for stopping you.

“I’m gonna take my hand away from your mouth, okay?” You nodded again, he did, and rested his forehead on your shoulder, sighing when he realised you really weren’t going to scream. “I’m sorry,” he added then, “shouldn’t have grabbed you like that.”

“It’s okay,” you said quietly, “I don’t mind it if you hold me Remus…” you mumbled. “I mean… Thank you.”

“What?!” he asked, baffled.

“You were right, it would have been stupid to join the fight. I wouldn’t have been able to do anything, I need to be more calm instead. Like I was in the library with the howler, like you. It’s just that Evan punching Sirius fucking vexed me.”

“I know…” he managed to say, me too, he thought. In fact, if you hadn’t been around, he might have actually been the person to throw punches after Sirius got the first one. Evan might have been taller and broader than your boyfriend, but he was no match against Remus, let alone if you factored in his werewolf strength.

You leaned back against him, the back of your head resting against his shoulder as you too sighed, “Does it always feel so terrible when a prank goes wrong?”

He hummed in response, “they’ll be all right, detention is just sitting in a classroom being bored or writing an essay most of the time… Don’t worry too much about them.”

“Feels bad that we’ll get out of this scots free but they won’t, though.”

“Survivors' guilt.”

You hummed, closing your eyes, “Thanks for holding me back,” you said again, “I don’t know what I’d do without you Rem.”

He stifled a laugh at that, you’d probably be more than fine without him. He, on the other hand… “Count on your good old werewolf friend to help you hold those murderous tendencies,” he joked. You actually laughed at that, and then covered your mouth with your hands, looking around.

“It’s all right, you can laugh, I cast a silencing spell,” he said, motioning to his hand with a small nod, he had his wand in a hold.

“Was that before or after you took your hand away from my mouth?” you asked. The guilty look on his face was hidden by your shoulder, but his lack of a straight answer gave him away regardless. “Dumbass, I wouldn’t have screamed, I’m not that reckless.”

“You literally left your wand on the floor with a werewolf in front of you. You ARE that reckless.”

“Well it wasn’t just any werewolf,” you said in self-defence, even if you were only digging yourself in a deeper hole. There was a comfortable silence and you sighed one last time, “We should finish up, the grand finale,” you said, finally separating from him, the lack of warmth almost made you shiver, “gotta make our boys proud, don’t we?”

He smiled, his eyes shimmering with mischief, “Let’s do it.”

Glossaire: Mo chailleachan àlainn: My beautiful fools Est-ce que ça fait de toi mon trésor?: Does that make you my treasure? Je peux être tout ce que tu veux que je sois: I can be whatever you wish me to be. Oui, mon amour: Yes my love

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A/N: Hey guys, this episode definetly took a little longer to post than I expected. But it's finally out! Hope you enjoy this one as much as I enjoyed writing it. How are we feeling? More cute Rem moments, right? What's gonna happen to James and Sirius though? ᕙ( ᗒᗣᗕ )ᕗ Lilly xxx

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analogwriting · 1 month

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Killer x gn!reader (afab) a/n: hopefully it's okay considering i wrote this slammered at the bar lmfao. also mo leannan and mo chridhe mean my love and my heart in old scots gaelic

“Killi, would you look at that view?” you said with a small gasp as you ran over to the window of the shared room the two of you were renting. Your crew was currently on some kind of resort island while the ship received repairs. They were deep repairs too, so everyone needed to be off the ship. Everyone spread out in the multiple resorts that the island had, wanting to try everything.

However, the only downside was that it was a wintery island, so you couldn’t exactly go outside and enjoy the sun too much without becoming absolutely frigid.

You felt a pair of strong arms wrap around your middle. “Mm, the view is nice, but I still think the view of you is better.” You snorted as Killer spoke, rolling your eyes. “You’re such a sap,” you mused, leaning into his touches.

“If it keeps snowing like this, we might end up getting stuck here. I think the only other two in this particular resort are Hip and Gig.”

You let out a gentle sigh as you felt his lips find their way to your neck, you tilted your head to the side to give him better access to your skin. “That’s fine,” he mumbled against you. “I didn’t plan on meeting up with anyone tonight anyway.”

“Is that so,” you mused, pressing against him. You could already feel the man starting to get riled up. After all, he’d already taken his helmet off the moment the two of you entered the room. He had been wanting to jump you since the moment you two were alone. You weren’t going to complain, you wanted the same thing.

“Mhmm,” he hummed against your skin, pressing a kiss to the spot where your shoulder and neck met before biting it softly. You gasped softly, chuckling. “I’m not going to argue with that.” You turned your head, kissing him hard.

He let out a small growl against you. You turned, sliding your arms around his neck and he pressed you against the cool glass of the large window. You let out a small whimper when you touched it; between that and the heat radiating off the man before you, it felt really good.

You pulled away from him for a moment, both of you panting heavily. You could see that the heat of both of your bodies was already fogging the glass on the window. You wondered just how foggy it was going to get.

You dropped to your knees, surprising Killer slightly with your sudden movement and change of pace. Considering the fact that he had treated you with extra care the last time, you figured you’d return the favor this time. It didn’t take you long to pull the man out from his cloth prison and, you were right, he was rock hard already.

“Already this riled up?” You had a light tease to your voice and licked your lips slightly.

His face was already flushed and he was panting just from the sheer anticipation and excitement of seeing you down on your knees. “You just do things to me,” he mumbled.

You just grinned before pressing a kiss to his tip, mostly just to mess with him. You knew taking it slow drove him even more wild, which would pay off in the end for you. He grunted softly as you pressed another kiss to the base of his shaft before dragging your tongue along the side of it, listening as he let out a shaky breath. He put a hand on the glass window behind you to support himself as the other hand found its way into your hair, giving a light tug that made you groan a bit in response.

You couldn’t help but tease him, it was your favorite thing to do. Mostly because it made it harder for him to hold back, which is exactly what you wanted. You wanted him to go wild on you. So, you took his cock, slowly sliding it down your throat as you pressed your tongue against its underside. He let out a long groan. “Oh, you’re being slow on purpose,” he ground out, knowing exactly what you were doing. But, he fell for it every time.

Or maybe he couldn’t just say no to you. He looked down at you as you looked up to him and winked. He gripped your hair firmly and you felt your heart race as you pulled off of him. You were panting slightly as you looked up at him.

“Ah, ah,” he mused in his gravelly voice. It always grew deeper when he was riled up, making you so excited. “What do you think you’re doin’?” You could hear as his accent was slipping through, making your heart race.

“Open.” You obeyed, opening your mouth, sticking your tongue out for him. He grinned. “Good, mo leannan.” A shiver ran down your spine as he used the native tongue you both had. It wasn’t long before he had his cock deep inside your throat once more, both of you groaning as he did so. Your entire body felt like it was on fire with how turned on you were in this moment.

“Now, move.” Once again, you obeyed, beginning to move your head. He grunted, his grip tightening and pulling on your hair more, making you whimper around him. You moved your hands to his thighs to steady yourself as you found a good pace to bob your head.

Though, you wished it would-

Your thoughts were interrupted as he did the very thing you were thinking about. He began moving his own hips, thrusting in and out of your mouth. Your eyes rolled back as you let him essentially have his way with you, tears pricking the corners of your eyes. Despite his rough movements, he was calculated enough not to actually cause you harm. Not that you’d be upset with a bit of aching from an activity like this.

Eventually, you could feel him twitching and his movements growing more erratic before his hips stilled as he shoved himself deep down your throat and came hard. Your eyes widened slightly as he reached so deep, but you welcomed it. When he pulled out, you made sure to swallow every bit, panting as you tried to recover for a moment.

He was panting as well, pulling you up so he could kiss you again. You hummed against him, wrapping your arms around him. “I always love it when you do that,” you mumble and he just grinned. He knew you liked it when he was rough, it was just pushing him to that point because he didn’t want to hurt you. Sometimes he forgot just how much you could really handle.

He pressed you against the glass once more and your entire body shivered and you whined. The shock of the cold only turned you on further and you could hardly stand it at this point. “Fuck, Killi. I need you,” you whined against him.

In one of the quickest fashions you’ve ever seen, he had your lower half completely clothing free. You yelped in surprise as the cooler air hit you, but more surprised when Killer turned you around and bent you over slightly. You pressed your warm face against the cold glass, eyes rolling back slightly as you whimpered.

At this point, you were sure he was doing this on purpose.

You shivered again as you felt his fingers trace along your folds, circling your clit. You let out a breathy moan, eyes rolling back slightly. “Killi,” you whined. You weren’t surprised that he was going to be the one teasing you now. You gasped, moaning loudly as he slipped one of his thick fingers inside, moving it around to start stretching you out.

It seemed he was just as impatient as you were because it wasn’t long before he had three fingers moving around inside of you, all kinds of noises of pleasure coming from you. However, between how turned on you were from earlier and the way he was handling you now, you could feel yourself being pushed towards the edge and that coil tightening from deep within your abdomen.

Only he pulled his fingers out before you could cum, making you whine in protest. “That was un-” You were cut off as you felt Killer begin to push himself inside of you, your words turning into nothing more than garbled moans. You leaned into the glass more, your eyes glued to the back of your head. Fuck, he always felt so good. Your toes curled a bit as your insides stretched for him and once he bottomed out, you were panting heavily, trying to keep your head from spinning too much yet.

“You’re doing well, mo chridhe,” he crooned in your ear in a low voice. All you could do was muster up some small moan in response, your brain already clouded with lust and the need to have him absolutely rail you against this window. His praises only riled you up more.

You opened your mouth to finally say something when he started to roll his hips, slowly pulling out of you before absolutely ramming himself back into you. You cried out, your entire body tingling as you felt that coil tighten and snap all at once, clenching around him as you came. You were panting heavily, your head spinning. “Better,” he teased lowly, playing off your statement from earlier that he had cut you off for. You just glanced at him over your shoulder, narrowing your eyes the best you could, but it only made him grin.

He enjoyed seeing you like this. The usual dominant doctor of the crew, a submissive and blubbering mess below him. And just for him. He leaned down, the movement somehow pushing himself deeper inside of you, forcing a mewl to come from you. He pressed a kiss to your shoulder before he absolutely began to destroy you. His hips moved fast and rough, the squelching noise of him rapidly moving in and out accompanying the sounds of skin against skin bouncing off the walls around you.

Not to mention you were far from quiet. The moans and cries for the other slowly became less and less coherent with each thrust. His grunts and growls sending shivers down your spine as he also left hickies all over your neck and shoulders. You definitely weren't going to be able to cover those without being suspicious.

At this point the window was fogged apart from where you were touching it, but as soon as you moved slightly, whatever glass was newly exposed was instantly fogged up. Much like your mind right now. It also wasn't very cold anymore, you had completely warmed it up. You were also glad there was a blizzard, no one could see you getting your insides rearranged from down below.

Between Killer holding on to your hips and being pressed into the glass, you were glad for the support because you weren't sure that you'd be able to stand on your own.

You felt him begin to twitch inside of you before his hips stopped and he filled you up quite generously, you weren't long after, crying out as you did so. Both of you were panting but you noticed that Killer didn't seem done quite yet.

Oh man, you were going to sleep good tonight.

You felt his arm snake around and his hand gently wrap around your throat. Ah, fuck. Your heart started racing even faster, if that was even possible. He lifted you up, standing with you as he pounded in and out of you. The window where you had been pressed against already fogging back up.

Your eyes rolled to the back of your skull, mind blank with the pure pleasure you were feeling. With his hand placement and the sheer force of his thrusts, he squeezed the sides of your neck to cut off your oxygen just a bit to give you that perfect high. You were a blubbering, drooling mess at this point. Your legs numb, body buzzing with pleasure as he had his way with you - and you wouldn't have it any other way.

You reached up behind you, grabbing at his hair and tugging it. Honestly, you were just moving without much thought. Killer let out a low groan as he bit into your shoulder roughly causing you to cry out his name. The first coherent thing you've said in the past half an hour.

He didn't last long this round, stilling his movements once more as he filled you up once again. You also came again, your head spinning rapidly as your body went slack against him. You were panting, trying to catch your breath. You felt Killer doing the same. He held on you you around your waist, his other hand on the window before you as he tried to keep both of you steady.

You mumbled something completely incoherent and you just felt him smile against your skin as he pressed soft kisses to the newest bite mark. That one wasn't going to be disappearing for a while.

After a few moments, Killer turned your face towards him and kissed you softly. “Mm, I think this view is my favorite,” he mumbled against you. You scoffed, rolling your eyes as you grinned.

“You're so cheesy.” You kissed him again, slowly gaining your strength back.

Honestly, if you were snowed in for a few days, you wouldn't exactly be upset about it.

#i didn't even go through and edit these btw #im so fuckin' gonezo garbonzo #one piece #one piece x reader #one piece x you #killer #killer x reader #massacre soldier killer #one piece smut #am fics

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kittyl1z · 3 months

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sub!rei x dom!fem!reader

sorry for any mistakes

subby rei is just... the prettiest princess of all! she is always the one who takes control at first, but really, this little baby can't handle it. "oh, so you think you can do it? you really think you can boss mommy around?" and that's all it takes for her to star whining. this day rei was very impatient and needy.

not a second went by without her by your side, she didn't wanted to leave you, you had rei in your lap all day long with your arms wrapped around her waist, all cuddly giving her kisses that made her giggle, until she took your hand in hers and guided you to her tits.

sure rei loved when you played with her nipples even if you two were 'just cuddling' but it was different. she was breathing heavily and started to grind on you.

"it looks like you really want to get fucked, don't you princess?" and she whines. the poor baby already got wet. your kisses found place on her neck while you sucked and bit on her skin, rei tried to control your hand to make you touch her but only whined when you took your hands off, earning a slap on her ass to which she rub herself on your thigh even more :(

"don't be impatient and wait, you don't wanna get mommy mad, right darling?" and oh, rei was wet. she whimpered but nodded. "now take this off" you tugged on her shirt and helped her. she got even more impatient at the painfully time you were taking. she was pouting all along and you couldn't resist her cute face, only wanting to fuck her harder. her tits were all free access for you, so you didn't waste any time in taking her nipple with your mouth, so eagering to suck and make a mess on her chest, to be honest her chest was so beautiful you could be drunk in her. your hands gripped on her hips, leading her movements to ride your thigh while you were marking up her tits. she was moaning so heavenly that you found yourself getting wet just by hearing her breathing and whimpering at how slow you were going on her.

she wanted you, she wanted you so bad to be fucking her, why would you do it so slow like that? rei looks like a real life fairy but don't let the innocent face fool you. when it comes to you, she turns into the dirtiest version of herself. it's not her fault that she got this hot girlfriend that makes her so needy everyday, gosh she just wants to be in all four in bed, getting fucked so hard to the point she can't remember her own name, only because you do it so well to her. and that's what you do. you love edging rei. she is just so sensitive that she cries so easily and makes everything better, you can't help it, she looks so beautiful crying and ruined by you that you could do it all day and all night.

"mommy, please.. p-please" she's crying, gripping into the bedsheets as your fingers pump in and out of her tight cunt. she was so wet that your fingers had an easier access to her, not taking any longer at filling her up with your fingers, hitting all the right places at a very short time only to pull them out when she started to chase the release.

"you can't take it, hm? that's it?" you teased her, she pouts and whimpers. "such a dumb pup, can't take for so long, huh? you're disappointing mommy, sweetheart." all rei can do is cry. she thrust her hips but you take your fingers out, looking at her with such cold heart eyes that makes her cheeks go red in embarrassment but she lies if she says she doesn't like it. "look at this mess of tears you are, pup, you really are so so pathetic." and when rei thought she couldn't cry harder, she did.

"m-mo.. mommy ple-please.. mph, i-i.. i c-can't... let me c-cum..." she talked in between hiccups and sobs. you took your fingers out once again.

"give mommy a kiss and i'll think about it." she whined at you, pulling you closer to give you a passionate kiss, almost tasting the heartbreak in it by the way her tears couldn't stop falling and her hiccups wouldn't stop either. in the middle of the kiss, your fingers thrust her again, at a force that she moaned in your lips, not helping you at your dripping cunt. "you can cum, princess." and just like that, rei finally let herself relax, letting all her fluids go down your fingers and hand, making a mess on her legs and the bedsheets. panting, she had a tight grip on your arms, trembling at the sensation of her orgasm after getting denied for like four times. "it's okay baby, you did so well, my pup." you kissed her forehead.

don't think that rei was done with the whining, because aftercare is her favorite thing. when you came back with a towel, water and chocolates for her, you found her all pouty and tired, whining for you to just get in bed with her and cuddle until you both are asleep.

#ive smut #ive x fem!reader #ive x reader #ive imagines #ive scenarios #rei x reader #rei x fem!reader #ive rei #ive rei smut #rei smut #ive rei x reader #ive rei scenario #ive rei imagine

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sassenach77yle · 10 days

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“You thought you were dying when we brought you up here, didn’t you?” I asked. My voice sounded more bewildered than accusing. It took him a moment to answer, though he didn’t look hesitant. It was more as though he was looking for the proper words. “Well, I didna ken for sure, no,” he said slowly. “Though I did feel verra ill.” His eyes closed, slowly, as though he were too tired to keep them open. “I still do,” he added, in a detached sort of voice.

“Ye needna worry, though—I’ve made my choice.”

“What on earth do you mean by that?” I groped beneath the covers, and found his wrist. He was warm; hot again, in fact, and with a pulse that was too fast, too shallow. Still, it was so different from the deathly chill I had felt in him the night before that my first reaction was relief. He took a couple of deep breaths, then turned his head and opened his eyes to look at me. “I mean I could have died last night.” He could, certainly—and yet that wasn’t what he meant. He made it sound like a conscious— “What do you mean you’ve made your choice? You’ve decided not to die, after all?” I tried to speak lightly, but it wasn’t working very well. I remembered all too well that odd sense of timeless stillness that had surrounded us. “It was verra strange,” he said. “And yet it wasna strange at all.” He sounded faintly surprised.

“I think,” I said carefully, keeping a thumb on his pulse, “you’d better tell me just what happened.” He actually smiled at that, though the smile was more in his eyes than his lips. Those were dry, and painfully cracked in the corners. I touched his lips with a finger, wanting to go and fetch some soothing ointment for him, some water, some tea—but I put aside the impulse, steeling myself to stay and hear. “I dinna really know, Sassenach—or rather, I do, but I canna think quite how to say it.” He still looked tired, but his eyes stayed open. They lingered on my face, a vivid blue in the morning light, with an expression almost of curiosity, as though he hadn’t seen me before.

“You are so beautiful,” he said, softly. “So verra beautiful, mo chridhe.”

My hands were covered with fading blue blotches and overlooked smears of buffalo blood, I could feel my hair clinging in unwashed tangles to my neck, and I could smell everything from the stale-urine odor of dye to the reek of fear-sweat on my body. And yet whatever he saw lit his face as though he were looking at the full moon on a summer night, pure and lovely. His eyes stayed fixed on my face as he talked, absorbed, moving slightly as they seemed to trace my features. “I felt verra badly indeed when Arch and Roger Mac brought me up,” he said. “Terribly sick, and my leg and my head both throbbing with each heartbeat, so much that I began to dread the next. And so I would listen to the spaces between. Ye wouldna think it,” he said, sounded vaguely surprised, “but there is a great deal of time between the beats of a heart.” He had, he said, begun to hope, in those spaces, that the next beat would not come. And slowly, he realized that his heart was indeed slowing—and that the pain was growing remote, something separate from himself. His skin had grown colder, the fever fading from both body and mind, leaving the latter oddly clear. “And this is where I canna really say, Sassenach.” He pulled his wrist from my grip in the intensity of his story, and curled his fingers over mine. “But I . . . saw.” “Saw what?” And yet I already knew that he couldn’t tell me. Like any doctor, I had seen sick people make up their minds to die—and I knew that look they sometimes had; eyes wide-fixed on something in the distance. He hesitated, struggling to find words. I thought of something, and jumped in to try to help. “There was an elderly woman,” I said. “She died in the hospital where I was on staff—all her grown children with her, it was very peaceful.” I looked down, my own eyes fixed on his fingers, still red and slightly swollen, interlaced with my own stained and bloody digits. “She died—she was dead, I could see her pulse had stopped, she wasn’t breathing. All her children were by her bedside, weeping. And then, quite suddenly, her eyes opened. She wasn’t looking at any of them, but she was seeing something. And she said, quite clearly, ‘Oooh!’ Just like that—thrilled, like a little girl who’s just seen something wonderful. And then she closed her eyes again.” I looked up at him, blinking back tears. “Was it—like that?” He nodded, speechless, and his hand tightened on mine. “Something like,” he said, very softly. He had felt oddly suspended, in a place he could by no means describe, feeling completely at peace—and seeing very clearly. “It was as if there was a—it wasna a door, exactly, but a passageway of some kind—before me. And I could go through it, if I wanted. And I did want to,” he said, giving me a sideways glance and a shy smile. He had known what lay behind him, too, and realized that for that moment, he could choose. Go forward—or turn back. “And that’s when you asked me to touch you?” “I knew ye were the only thing that could bring me back,” he said simply. “I didna have the strength, myself.” There was a huge lump in my throat; I couldn’t speak, but squeezed his hand very tight. “Why?” I asked at last. “Why did you . . . choose to stay?” My throat was still tight, and my voice was hoarse. He heard it, and his hand tightened on mine; a ghost of his usual firm grip, and yet with the memory of strength within it. “Because ye need me,” he said, very softly. “Not because you love me?” He looked up then, with a shadow of a smile.

“Sassenach . . . I love ye now, and I will love ye always. Whether I am dead—or you—whether we are together or apart. You know it is true,” he said quietly, and touched my face. “I know it of you, and ye know it of me as well.”

He bent his head then, the bright hair swinging down across his cheek. “I didna mean only you, Sassenach. I have work still to do. I thought—for a bit—that perhaps it wasna so; that ye all might manage, with Roger Mac and auld Arch, Joseph and the Beardsleys. But there is war coming, and—for my sins—” he grimaced slightly, “I am a chief.” He shook his head slightly, in resignation. “God has made me what I am. He has given me the duty—and I must do it, whatever the cost.”

“The cost,” I echoed uneasily, hearing something harsher than resignation in his voice. He looked at me, then glanced, almost off-handed, toward the foot of the bed. “My leg’s no much worse,” he said, matter-of-factly, “but it’s no better. I think ye’ll have to take it off.”

The fiery cross

#outlander #outlanderedit #the frasers #outlander starz #jamie fraser #outlander series #outlander fanart #samheughan #jamie&claire #jamie and claire #dr claire randall #claire beauchamp #claire fraser #caitrionabalfe #outlander season 5 #outlander books #outlander book #outlander 5x09

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thatsthewrongwallcraig · 9 months

Text

Insomnia

Summary: After tossing and turning for the better part of the night, Roman helps you to find ways to relax.

Pairing: Roman Roy x fem!Reader

Word Count: ~2k

Content Warnings: Fluffy Smut 18+!, Everybody Is Needy And Soft In Here, Unprotected P In V, Nipple Play, A Little Bit Of Logan Roy Slander, Roman Being Absolutely Enamored With Reader, L-Bombs, Established Relationship Because I Just Want Roman To Be Happy For Once 🤧

A/N: This fic was brought to you by my current inability to sleep 🫠

(Happy little edit: By the time I finished the fic, I had finally slept a whole night 🥲)

Tagging:

@alalalaaallaaalaaa @crypticsewerslut @angelsanarchy @arch1viste @icarus-star @fadedviolets

Für Elise - Reimagined By Alexander Joseph (I WHOLEHEARTEDLY encourage you to listen to this piece of art!)

Round after repetitive round your slightly burning, half-lidded eyes followed the quietly whirring ceiling fan right above the bed. Everything was perfect, the sheets fresh, the room temperature comfortably cool and the muffled out city sounds in the background provided just enough white noise to drown out your everlasting inner monologue and yet you just couldn't fall asleep.

You've already been cutting out caffeine for a few days now, carbohydrates too and with that practically everything that was remotely fun, hell, you even picked up a guided meditation podcast here and there trying to simply put yourself to sleep by getting bored enough but nothing really did the job. With each and every night passing like this, getting one to two hours of fairly interrupted sleep at best, you dreaded it a little more.

"Goddammit." You huffed under your breath before turning yourself to the side where Roman was comfortably snoozing next to you.

His back was facing your front as you scooted up close to him to gently wrap your arm around his waist, fingertips sneaking themselves underneath the hem of his white t-shirt while you rested your forehead against his shoulder. For a few minutes you just listened to him breathing in a steady pace, his ribcage rising and falling with every peaceful inhale and you couldn't help yourself but to envy him a little.

You couldn't explain to yourself how he did it, dealing with pent-up assholes, the worst of them being his father without a doubt, all day long and then just passing out when he felt like ending the day. Right now you wished for that ability to be one of your own, too, but for now it was to no avail. Pondering over it for longer would only turn you more sour by the minute and that wouldn't exactly help anyone here right now. Instead, you gently sighed into the soft and warm fabric of his shirt, shoving as much of the internalized malice regarding your situation to the side while much rather focusing on your curious fingertips that you led to wander over his defined torso. In gentle, slow strokes, you traced the outlines of his muscles up to his ribcage, caressed his collarbone, that was slightly curved upwards in this position, and then all the way back down again, your fingers getting lost in the softly curled hair of his happy trail down to the waistband of his shorts.

"You're getting me all worked up here.." Roman's sleep-drunk voice whispered to you.

"Sorry… I didn't mean to." You reciprocated, drawing your fingers from his lower abdomen until you felt his broad hand softly pressing yours back onto his skin.

"No, no, it's fine, don't you worry, babe. Still can't sleep, huh?" His tone was laced with a heavy layer of upright worry about you.

"Nope, Morpheus still won't treat me with a dream or two. Just endless buzzing up in the noggin." It left your mouth alongside a tired and painfully exhausted yawn.

"I'm sorry.", Rome yawned right there with you whilst he turned himself on his back, offering you his arm to seek shelter under, "Come here, you don't have to suffer through that alone."

"You don't have to be sorry, it's none of your fault." You shrugged your shoulders a little, quickly moving into his embrace and resting your weary head on his chest.

"But I really think it would be if I didn't try to help you somehow." He stated rather bluntly before placing a soft kiss to your hairline.

"Oh, Rome, you don't need to make this your problem, really-" With a well audible smile in his voice, Roman cut you off.

"But I want to! And I'm going to." He whispered against your forehead as his hand, that hung around your shoulder, started to softly caress your upper arm.

In barely even there strokes with his fingertips, Rome brushed over your skin from shoulder to elbow and back again, leaving waves of goosebumps after goosebumps in his wake.

"Now you're getting me all worked up!" You smiled against his chest, pressing your body impossibly closer to his, the silky soft fabric of your satin slip dress rubbing against his shirt.

"Oh, god forbid, am I right?", Roman laughed out softly, "And what if I do that right here?"

His other hand reached out to lift your chin up to his face before he leaned in to press a longing and anything but chaste kiss to your lips.

With that, he elicited a low moan of yours to get swallowed up by his mouth, his tongue darting out between his lips, gently snaking towards yours, nudging it playfully. Immediately, you felt your blood rushing down between your legs in nearly violent determination, an aching need to feel him even closer with you drowning out everything else.

"Fuck, Roman." You sighed against his lips, trying to steady your breath.

"If you insist.", You felt the grin forming on his face, "Please, take a seat and make yourself comfortable."

"If you insist." You chuckled right back whilst reaching down to your hips, taking a hold of the lacey string underneath the slip dress and shimmied out of it.

"Keep the dress on, please? You just look stunning in it." Roman asked in a breathy tone, pulling himself back a little to sit up straight against the headboard.

"Of course…" You whispered with a smile on your lips, rising yourself so far from the mattress until you were able to arch one leg over his waist and straddle his lap.

"Oh, damn.." He groaned a little raspy as the length of his pulsing cock pressed against your thoroughly soaked folds, your slick threatening to just drip down on him.

"That's all you, getting me wet like that." You said in return, wrapping your arms around his neck before rolling your hips against his lap to let him slide right inside of.

The feeling of him filling you right up to the brim, the girth of his cock stretching you out delightfully, had you both moaning out in pleasure. It absolutely didn't matter how many times you had slept with each other in whatever way, the moment of Roman thrusting into you for the first time was something that simply knocked the air from your lungs and eradicated any and every thought from your crowded mind.

"You feel so fucking good around me, you have no idea.", He hummed against your cheek before peppering the corner of your mouth with playful pecks of his lips, "And it just drives me insane when you wear just that slip dress here."

"It's the one you gifted me on our last anniversary, remember?" Your breath heavy as you started rolling your hips at a slow pace.

"How could I forget, babe?" Rome smiled at you, cheeks flushed in a soft tint of red and his olive eyes sparkling with unbridled joy even in the dark.

Seeing him beam at you like this made you forget all about not being able to sleep for the past two weeks, it made you forget all about the negativity that followed your each and every step through the days but what it made you remember clearly was how much you loved him. Every part of him from his expressive eyebrows, to his loud mouth to his colorful and exciting character.

"I love you, Roman." It fell from your lips before they touched his in a nearly bruising kiss.

"And I love you…more than anything." He reciprocated as soon as you broke from the kiss a little, leading his mouth to wander over your jaw, pressing loving kisses and playfully soft bites down your neck and all over your collarbone.

The tip of his nose stroked over the cleavage that the silken slip dress gave room for before his lips wandered down another notch to close around one of your perked up nipples, suckling at it carefully. A rush of pleasure seeped from your chest throughout your whole body as you felt the thin fabric soaking up his saliva, a wet patch forming around your areola before he moved on to the other side. The ceiling fan from above rendered the damp spot cold to your skin, sending soft shivers down your spine whilst you allowed yourself to just not think for once.

With eyes fluttered shut, you let your head roll back, basking in each little sensation he gifted to your body. This right now wasn't about chasing an orgasm just for the sake of getting off, no, this moment of shared intimacy was about feeling each other in the closest way possible and you reveled in every second of it.

"Love you so fucking much.." Roman's breathy tone got muffled by the fabric and you could hear that he was equally far gone by now, carefully joining in on your rhythm with every roll of your hips over his lap as his hands held you by the waist.

You intently listened to his shallow breathing, the sound of skin slapping against skin and the wet sounds of his lips Kissing and sucking on your nipples in a seemingly relentless vigor as you felt your walls tightening around his cock, the tip of it stroking over that especially sensitive part repeatedly.

"I'm about to…fuck, I…" It cascaded out of your mouth into the bedroom as you weren't even able to for a coherent sentence before it rippled through your body.

Orgasmic bliss set every nerve on fire for a split second, your pussy contracting in reckless waves around him, pulling him further in and eventually throwing him over his own edge. With raggedy breaths and choked back moans, Roman pressed his face into your neck as his fingers clawed at your waist. You felt him filling you up with throbbing pumps of his twitching cock as he pressed himself as far as possible into you with one final thrust.

Neither of you said a word whilst you pulled yourself off of him, the accumulation of bodily fluids leaving a little mess in his lap and between your thighs, and curled your satisfied body up to his again.

"Do you want me to read you something?" Roman asked and to say it caught you by surprise was a broad understatement.

"Huh?" You looked up to him with arched brows.

"I vaguely remember you telling me how much you liked being read to back when we started dating and I'm quite a bit ashamed that I never did that for you by now." He answered with a soft smile on his lips.

"You…you remember that?" It rolled over your tongue in some sort of excited shock.

"Of course I do, babe. So, would you like me to? If you're lucky, I'll find something a little more suitable than a yucky Forbes magazine."

#roman roy x reader #roman roy smut #roman roy x you #roman roy x fem!reader #roman roy #succesion hbo #succession #succession fanfic #kieran culkin

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kitasgloves · 5 months

Text

— ♬ NSFW

part 1

Everything feels so hot. ATSUMU MIYA's head was spinning delightfully with how you and your husband touched him. Your lips were latched against his, sucking his bottom lip until it was swollen. Sakusa was leaving bite marks on his tender neck while he massaged his bare thighs. Atsumu couldn't help but feel greedy.

"Mo-more please"

He whimpered. You shared a look with Sakusa who's behind Atsumu and both smirked. Atsumu has been naked for twenty minutes, drowning in both of your affection.

"Think you're ready, sweetheart?"

You purred to the blonde as he helplessly nodded. Sakusa grabs Atsumu's jaw and locks them in place as his lips ghosts against the setter's ear, sending an aroused shiver.

"You better not miss a goddamn thing, Miya"

Oh, Atsumu wasn't planning to when Sakusa whispered lowly against his ear. You begin to strip as Atsumu watched hungrily. As you settled on the blonde's lap, Sakusa starts to tug down his sweatpants. Atsumu gasps as you grabbed his dick and gave it a few languid strokes.

"Can't wait to get you and Omi inside of me"

Atsumu was about to open his mouth to reply until you lined his cock against your entrance. You slowly sank down causing the two of you to let out a low moan. You felt so tight and warm. Sakusa finds his place behind you as he grabs your hips and pulls your ass up. His cock teases the entrance of your asshole, he spits in his hand covering it all over his dick before gently entering.

Holy fucking shit

Atsumu thinks. There's no way he and Sakusa were inside of you right now. He's fighting the urge not to bust right there and now. The three of you went still for a few seconds until Sakusa begins to move. You and Atsumu groaned. The spiker starts to find the perfect pace. Atsumu felt encouraged to move his hips upwards and it makes you yelp and grab his shoulders.

"Oh fuck!"

You moaned as the two men tried to find the perfect rhythm while buried deep inside of you. When Sakusa's pace begins to quicken, Atsumu goes slack as he lets out a loud moan. You leaned against the blonde, gasping against his neck.

"Alright, let me know if I should slow down or go fast, darling"

"Okay"

Both you and Atsumu replied. An embarrassed flush appears on the blonde's cheeks as Sakusa tries not to laugh at his slip-up. The spiker begins to move his hips sensually. You and Atsumu held on to each other for dear life, sharing whimpers and groans.

"Fuck baby, can you go faster?"

You panted. Sakusa obligied as the pace of his hips quickened. Atsumu throws his head back with a high pitched moaned while you go cross-eyed.

"Fuck! I can feel ya, Omi!"

"Yeah? Do I feel good, Atsumu?"

Although the question wasn't directed to you, you replied with a breathless 'yes'. Sakusa pounds your ass as you and Atsumu reveled in the pleasure. Sakusa chuckles as he leans down against your ear.

"You're taking us so well, darling"

You whimper and clench around both of them, Sakusa and Atsumu moaned in unison.

"Faster, Omi!"

"Fuck! M'gonna cum!"

Both of you were so impatient, Sakusa thinks. However, the view makes it all worth it. You're lying against Atsumu, breasts rubbing against his chest, the setter was fighting to not let his eyes roll back with every thrust. When Sakusa hits a particular spot, both you and Atsumu threw your heads back simultaneously letting your eyes travel to the back of your heads.

Sakusa grins devilishly as he targets the same spot with a much brutal pace. Both you and Atsumu had your jaws slack and drunk on pleasure. Sakusa wraps a hand around your throat from behind while he reaches to capture Atsumu's lips. The two shared a brief but heated kiss and it pushes you close to your release.

"Hnngh! Oh fuck!"

You moaned wantonly. Sakusa's pace grows rapid, showing his incoming orgasm. Atsumu whimpers as you begin to drool.

"Ya both feel so fucking good"

Atsumu grunted. The way he can feel you tightening around his cock and Sakusa's cock ramming inside your ass pushes him to the edge. You softly placed your hand on his cheek.

"Cum-ah!-cum inside of me, 'kay?"

You told him. You were the first to cum, letting out a silent scream. Atsumu followed after two thrusts from Sakusa, his cum painting your walls. Sakusa grits his teeth and viciously rams against you while both of you were still in the middle of orgasm before cumming in your ass too.

All three of your labored breathing echeoed in the room. As soon as the high has passed, you all pull apart and laid together on the mattress. Atsumu was squished between you and your husband. He finds it absurd that he just had sex with a married couple.

"That was...fucking amazing"

You said. Sakusa lets out a breathless chuckle. Suddenly, Atsumu feels shy even if he was lying naked with the both of you.

"Are you okay, Atsumu?"

"Yeah Omi, just processin' everythin'"

"Did you enjoy it, Tsumu?"

"Yes, [Name]"

This makes you smile as you enveloped him in a hug. Sakusa grunts and softly kisses both you and Atsumu's forehead.

"I'm gonna go start the bath"

The spiker pushes himself up as he trudges butt naked to the bathroom.

"We should do this more often"

"...You guys really don't mind me?"

"No! We adore you, Tsumu. Although Omi isn't too keen showing it, he truly does"

"I heard that, [Name]! Get both of your asses here the bath is ready"

You shared a giggle with Atsumu as you two entered the bathroom to wash off with Sakusa. Needless to say, round two unfolded during the bath.

sorry part 2 took so long lol

#— ♬ ©kitasgloves #haikyuu #haikyuu fanfiction #haikyuu fic #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu smut #sakusa kiyoomi #miya atsumu #sakusa kiyoomi x reader #atsumu miya x reader #sakusa x reader #atsumu x reader #sakusa x reader x atsumu #sakuatsu

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absolutebl · 6 months

Text

This Week in BL - Gangsters Win

Organized, in each category, by ones I'm enjoying most at the top. Delayed October reviews included this week! (Still traveling but now in home territory and familiar hotels.)

Nov 2023 Wk 2

Ongoing Series - Thai

My Dear Gangster Oppa (Thurs iQIYI) 2 of 8 - GIVING ME LIFE. How dare they be this… this... Just. How dare!

Twins the series (Fri GaGa) ep 1 of 10 - I have been waiting for another truly sports centered BL since HIStory 2: CTL. This is nowhere near as good, but I don’t care. It’s great pulp and Sprite is a fab central character. I've realized that I love the pulps most when they’re ridiculously soapy (identical twins identity trope for sport’s fuck’s sake) but ERNEST about it (not campy). This one is taking itself seriously and it's so cute that it's trying so hard. Good little pulp. Dee mar.

Dangerous Romance (Fri YT) ep 12fin - was it me or did this show kinda flag on you too?

Poor, struggling Sailom is forced to tutor his bully, Kang, and they fall for each other despite circumstances. I loved it for the first 4 eps, liked it for the middle 4, and then kinda lost interest. I think it's because the focus shifted from Sailom to Kang, and I just find a disenfranchised character more interesting than the poor little rich kid archetype. Ultimately the script waffled and failed these actors - the leads and sides were solid, and support cast on point. 8/10 pretty standard 2023 GMMTV fair

Absolute Zero (Thai Weds iQIYI) ep 6 of 12 - It’s sort of a paradox of emotions not just time. It remains sad and I remain wary.

My Universe (Sun iQIYI) The Camp Fire ep 11 of 24 - Launched with an argument over rude pronouns and mistaken identity. Highlights the joy of camping. Ugh. I don't think this one is for me despite the pair.

Venus in the Sky (Tues iQIYI) ep 10fin - NO SINGING. I can't believe they brought in rando SIDEs just to sing! WHHHHYYYYY? Sigh.

An indifferent pulp with indifferent acting and poor chemistry (despite high heat) based on the reunion romance trope that was just... so... slow... It wasn’t entirely a waste of time but I can’t in good faith recommend it. unless you have a very high tolerance for Thai pulps and ultra tsundere characters. 5/10 ONLY WATCH IF YOU'VE NOTHING BETTER TO DO

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Kiseki: Dear to Me (Taiwan Tues Viki & iQIYI) ep 12 of 13 - I don’t mean to be rude because you know I love the main couple in the show, but they are simply being out acted by the sides. They are so damn good. Ai Di and his dumb oversized sweaters and flappy flappy sleeves is EVERYTHING.

Bump Up Business (Korea Gaga) 5-6 of 8 - More language negotiation, so of course I like it. I also like that they openly let Eden admit to a crush on a boy. I like this whole thing way more than I should. Save me from myself?

You Are Mine (Taiwan Fri Viki) eps 9 of 10 - I don’t understand why baby boy is trying to escape so badly. (Except for plot reasons.) Running of the gays! Look at you Taiwan stealing Japan’s favorite trope. This show is fun but it’s a bag of tropes held together with some very thin fraying mesh plot.

If It’s With You AKA Even If I Fall In Love With You AKA Kimi to nara Koi wo Shite Mite mo’ (Japan Gaga) ep 5fin - The leads are so painfully cute portraying a softly simple story of teen first love. This was a nice little piece with an early yaoi feel that come off as brief, as if it were meant to be a short story that had been extended into a series. Sweet but ultimately rather forgettable. 7/10

Mr Cinderella 2 (Vietnam Sat YT) ep 6-7 of ? - yeah I forgot to watch again, I may be dnfing this by accident.

It's Airing But...

I Cannot Reach You AKA I Can't Reach You AKA Kimi ni wa Todokanai (Japan Tues Netflix-Japan & ????) - in classic JBL fashion, I Cannot Reach You could not be reached. It looks good though so I mgiht put some effort into finding it grey.

Look at Japan dropping all the tropes in on scene: rooftop, kabedon, hand hold.

SHADOW (Thai Gaga) 1-7 of 14 - this is a horror BL with ghosts & paranormal elements in a boarding school setting. I'm not wild about Thai horror (or horror at all). It features Singto (who did paranormal BL He's Coming to Me) opposite Fluke N (who's done a couple horror's before). Also Fiat. Dan suffers from sleep paralysis, and in his dreams he sees a shadow that suffocates him. It gets worse when he transfers schools. I'm holding off on this one and if told it's good I'll binge watch.

What Did You Eat Yesterday Season 2 AKA Kinou Nani Tabeta? Season 2 (Japan Gaga) ep 1 of 10 - I find this series more fun to binge, so I'm waiting until it completes its run.

One Room Angel (Japan Gaga) - adaptation of Harada’s manga of the same name (which I did not like) about a convenience store clerk who's stabbed, nearly dies, and returns home to find an angel waiting for him. With only 5 eps and a good chance this won’t end happy, I'm gonna wait and let you tell me how it goes.

Can I Buy Your Love From A Vending Machine? AKA Sono Koi, Jihanki de Kaemasu ka? (Japan cinema release in-country only) - This one is a movie from Japan so in customary fashion who tf knows when (or if) it will get international distribution. Salaryman Ayumu Koiwai just can't tear his eyes away from the strong, muscular man as he checks on the stocks of the vending machine in his office. I did some hunting but only found the manga, so I'm marking it cnf and moving on with life. This will be its last appearance on the weekly update.

I Finished It!

Love in Translation (iQIYI) ep 8 - solid ending, man these two are a great pairing.

A sweet little pulp about a Thai boy with a crush on a Chinese influencer who ends up in a business relationship with her ex-bf. This show had truly great chemistry between the leads, cute found family with good rep, and an exciting (if silly) ending that almost, but didn't quite, make up for how incredibly annoying the main character was in the first half. Gotta say the make-out scene in the convenience store is one of the greatest in Thai BL, tho. 6/10 DEF WORTH WATCHING BUT FLAWED

I Feel You Linger in the Air (grey) ep 8 of 12 - so that was A THING. I did a seriously extensive deep dive analysis, historical & linguistic extras, and review here.

I truly loved this time travel romance. IFYLITA is an exquisite BL, from filming techniques to narrative framework (much like Until We Meet Again). Steeped in history and family drama it edges into lakorn (but no as much as To Sir With Love and with way less scenery chewing). This is an elegant and classy BL… from Thailand which normally doesn't even try for classy. The main couple (both as a pair and individuals) were excellent, particularly Bright (Yai) whose eye-work acting style is a personal favorite of mine. Pity about the ending. Oh it wasn’t that sad but it wasn’t good either. This show should easily have earned a 10 from me except that it fumbled the… erm… balls. Argh. Whatever. 9/10

Only Friends (YT) ep 11-12 - What can I say, this wasn't my thing, it was never gonna be, and I didn't like it. Basically Thailand did the L-Word but with branded BL pairs and the only agenda seemed to be slut shaming and making sure those pairs stayed healthy and sponsor ready. Consequently, the pairs were all executing well and to the best of their ability (of course) but all other characters got shafted, both in the good and the worst possible ways. Unrated but if falls somewhere between 5 (hot mess) and 3 (what am I doing with my life?)

Next Week Looks Like This

11/10 Middleman’s Love (Thai Fri Mandee's YT & iQIYI 1 of 8? - TutorYim (brand pair origin = Cutie Pie) with side couple KingUea (Bed Friends) from Domundi trailer here. This used to be a JimmyTommy vehicle before the pair split (also prev title Middle Love). Adapted from a Y-novel. Jade works as a graphic designer and has always been stuck in the middle - average. His heart is hardened after a life spent being overlooked because he is not as charming or good looking as the rest of his family or friends. When his office gets a hot new intern, Mai, Jade assumes Mai couldn’t possibly be intersted in him. Mai, of course, has other ideas. Warning this is a Cheewin comedy so tonally it could be very OFF, but the cast is solid, and I have liked his stuff on occasion.

11/10 Last Twilight (Thai Fri YouTube) - JimmySea are bakc and maybe it's good this time? I dont' know, GMMTV isn't doing great right now. Burdened with heavy debt, Mork, a mechanic, is forced to take a high paying job as a caretaker for Day, a rich heir who suffers from partial blindness after an accident. Day recruits Mork as he realizes the latter does not see him as a disabled person, but rather as co-equals. As they spend time together, the two begin developing feelings for the other. However with Day just having 180 days until he becomes permanently blind, how will the two weather the trials ahead?Upcoming November BL

11/11 Beyond The Star (Weds iQIYI) qp 1 of 8 - Looks like House of Stars meets Boyband. I am not excited.

Upcoming in November

11/16 PLAYBOYY (Thurs ????) ?? eps - trailer here, high heat and it's helmed by Cheewin (shudder) with screenplay by Den (Only Friends) under Copy A Bangkok. It's gonna be a shizz show people. It's predicting Thai style "dark" (War of Y) one of my least favorites. Apparently there is a "plot" but when has Cheewin ever bothered with plot? A university kid who was involved with escorts, sex-trade, porn, online hook-ups, drugs, prostitution, blackmail, revenge, and so forth goes missing. His twin (sigh) and two friends look for him.

11/17 Pit Babe (Fri iQIYI) ep 1 of 14 - high heat teaser here, based on alittlebixth's omegaverse novel #พิษเบ๊บ’ set in the world of car racing (author says show will not be omegaverse). Charlie (fresh face), a young hot nerd, approaches his driver idol (Pavel "my love" 2 Moons 2) to borrow a racing car and win one for the team. Production house is new to BL but behind the Club Friday stuff. Show stars many known actors: Nut (Oxygen), Pop (Ram in La Cuisine), Pon (Phai in Gen Y, we LOVE him), Benz (twins in En of Love: This Is Love Story).

11/19 Bake Me Please (Sun Gaga) ep 1 of 6 - trailer here, stars Ohm (of OhmFluke) opposite Guide (bestie from IFYLITA) and possibly also Poom (well known, but not for BL). This looks like an actually gay version of Antique Bakery (play it again, BL). Still, I'm intrigued, it looks HELLA pretty.

11/22 7 Days Before Valentine (Weds ????) ep 1 of 10 - trailer here, horror-esk. Adapted from y-novel of the same name, directed by Tu (180 Degree) stars Jet (Why You… Y Me?). When you want your old love again, but fate sends you a reaper instead. All he can do for you is kill people. I'll likely give this a pass and wait to binge later. I'm planning to try SHADOW and I can only handle one Thai horror at a time.

11/25 The Sign (Sat ????) ep 1 of 10 - trailer here, horror-esk, but with a suspense and adult characters. Special investigators who loved each other in previous lives reunite with their new bodies, stars Billy Patchanon (BillySeng) & Babe Tanatat (new). Includes other SCOY favorites as a special investigation team. I may give this a try because I like the non-horror bits.

11/26 The Whisperer (Sun ????) 1 of 10 - trailer here. Thai horror BL that ALSO involves cheating (what joy is mine). He has dimples (My Ride) but I don't think even that gives me the will. Maybe a binge for me.

11/26 Cooking Crush (Sun YT) 1 of 12 - OffGun are back, trailer here. Adapted from the novel “Love Course! เสื้อกาวน์รุกเสื้อกุ๊กรับ” by iJune4S this is about Prem who runs a not-so-popular restaurant with 2 friends. About to go on a cooking competition with a huge reward, Prem gets involved with Ten, a stressed-out med student who wants Prem to teach him to cook.

11/30 For Him (Thurs ????) ep 1 of 10 - high heat trailer, I suspect iQIYI will scoop this one up. From the people who brought us Unforgotten Night (please no) based on a y-novel, man nursing a heartbreak has a one-night stand, but the other boy didn't want it to end. It looks terribly trashy so I'm in! Maybe I'll do a trash watch?

VIP Only (Taiwan) - may be delayed/canceled

Wuju Bakery AKA Space Bakery (Korea) - this one may be DOA

A Breeze of Love (Korea) - I know less than nothing about this.

Nov 2023 line up with screen caps here. Not kept updated.

Original 2023 forthcoming BL master post (see comments, some are inaccurate, NOT KEPT UPDATED).

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

Yang's little smile! Argh. (Love in Translation)

This is our mean and grumpy gagster character talking about playing in game support roles. It's fucking adorable. Such a nasty criminal. (My Dear Gangster Oppa)

(Last week)

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wrathofrats · 16 days

Note

If you're comfortable with it yourself what about someone comforting Swiss over him getting a bit of a tummy over the last tour. Always feel he uses over confidence to cover up the fact he's just as insecure as everyone else (we all love the tummy and him dearly)

First of all I appreciate the asking if I’m comfortable or not, things like that can be triggering but I’m cool to write this rn, but genuinely thank you for the check, it means a lot that you thought of that!

Have some Swiss insecurity rambles, featuring small talk of body image issues, and mountain bc swissalps disease is chronic.

Honestly I think he’s a bit embarrassed of the insecurity itself. Looks in the mirror and just kinda examines himself. Gained a bit of pudge, softer around the edges. He knows rain and dew are obsessed with the new found fat judging by some of the still healing bite marks. And he’s always found aether unbearably attractive, so the insecurity seems stupid to him more than anything.

But he can’t help but judge, can’t help but to scrutinize and prod at every soft feature. Stare at every freckle or spot of discolored skin or scar until he’s ruined his day in just a couple minutes. He throws his sweatpants and a sweatshirt back on, something baggy to get him to stop looking.

He ends up in mountains room as he seems to do often these days. Better than being alone in his room, and mountain usually hoards snacks in there anyways. So it’s a win win situation.

“Hi starlight” mountain smiles as Swiss allows himself into his room. He instinctually slides over to make room for his multi, closing his laptop and shuffling it to his nightstand.

“Hi mo” Swiss climbs in to slot next to him, wasting no time to snuggle into his side. Mountain wraps his arm around him to pull him closer, giving Swiss a small squeeze.

“You seem upset, everything alright?” Mountain pets at his head.

“How would you even know that”

“I know everything starlight” mountain states

“Liar”

“I can just read you well, besides, your water shows up when you get sad, you’re freezing Swiss”

Swiss rolls his eyes. He knows mountains right. His skin tends to go cold when he’s not in a good mood, cool water practically coursing through his veins. His hands feel like ice cubes when mountain reaches to warm them in his own.

“Talk to me, I don’t like it when my starlight is sad”

“Just feeling … weird I guess. Gained a bit of weight on tour I think. It’s whatever”

Mountain doesn’t mean laugh. A quick chuckle and a confused look while Swiss seems ashamed of his confession.

“Just means you’re healthy Swiss. Besides, you’ll need it for winter”

“What?”

“Earth and pebble always make sure they were gaining extra fat for when the harvest slows in the winter. Poor Ivy never keeps much on him, he’s a lanky thing. But earth and pebble would be proud of you”

Swiss laughs a bit at the explanation. Some earth ghoul ritual nonsense that he always enjoys hearing about. Mountain rests his hand on Swiss’ stomach, not moving, just a caring touch.

“Besides, I think it’s beautiful on you”

“You think everything is beautiful on me mo”

“Maybe I just think you’re beautiful”

“….. shut up”

#cw body image #I think earth ghouls are so old school about everything and I love them #the band ghost #ghost #nameless ghouls #ghost bc #fanfic #wrath writes #swiss ghoul #mountain ghoul

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idolomantises · 1 year

Text

I think I’m gonna discuss this once and hopefully never have to bring it up again. Originally I wanted to talk about it on Twitter but people are very disrespectful when it comes to mental health so… ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Basically, I haven’t been doing so great, mentally. Nothing bad has happened to me, I’m safe and surrounded by people I care about, and it’s been like that for months. I just, I haven’t been feeling good.

For people who do follow me on accounts like Twitter and Instagram, you may have noticed I haven’t posted anything new since January. I was struggling to feel motivated to make something for my main accounts despite having countless ideas I’d love to work on. I feel better now and do plan on getting something done in March, but that sudden lack of motivation is pretty rare for me. Art is not only my job but a big hobby for me, I just love drawing. I did get some nsfw art done at least.

I don’t know what really prompted my mental health decline, I’ve been getting a few worried messages and fanart because someone insulted my art. But that didn’t hurt me at all, it actually boosted my account and patreon.

I guess I just… got sad?

I have a really bad tendency to suppress and even ignore my trauma and feelings of guilt. And I guess one day I really sat with my thoughts and I just, lost it I guess. I have so much traumatic memories and sudden and intense feelings of self loathing, something I’ve never felt in almost a decade, that it got overwhelming. I couldn’t reassure myself, I couldn’t really talk to anyone about it because how do you confront things that happened years ago? You feel almost irrational. It’s just memories that haunt you, it’s nothing physical or tangible and yet it’s a crushing feeling of anxiety, self hatred and resentment.

I was crying almost every day, and crying so much that my eyes kept hurting long after I was done, and I could barely see my own screen. I’ve had paranoid thoughts about myself and others, thoughts I can’t get into because they’re so deeply irrational. I was feeling suicidal urges and thoughts of self harm. I don’t see myself doing it, but it’s so frequent and overwhelming it’s like I’m already planning my suicide note.

I was talking to my therapist about it, that I was starting to hate being alive. That I hated living. That I could spend the next 50 years of my life with no more conflict or trauma and I’d still be in intense misery and turmoil. They’re feelings I couldn’t really bring myself to tell friends about because what could they say? How do you calm yourself down and reassure yourself. I can’t even talk about my trauma verbally without crying. And it’s funny because sometimes minor irks started to affect me negatively. I was feeling anxious about what to draw because I didn’t want to do deal with homophobic backlash.

I went to a therapist, I talked to friends, Ive been working out more and eating better, I did everything I should do to improve my mental health and all of a sudden a single night just sitting in my room destroyed everything I was slowly building up over the past 5 years.

It’s been really difficult for me. I think also, I just felt so much guilt over not being the best person I could be. I decided to lessen my online usage, not just for my mental health but because I really wanted to work on being a better person. I want to stop hating myself and letting my trauma push me down and I want to do just be better and do better as a person. A lot of people have been very forgiving and kind to me but I don’t feel like it’s enough and I want to do more and I want to feel better about myself. I want to give everything I can to people around me. I’ve been going to therapy a lot more lately and things are getting better for me, but it’s been a very slow process.

I just want to repeat that nothing serious has happened to me. Nobody attacked me in a way that negatively affected my health. A lot of people, friends and strangers have been really nice to me these past few months. I just was doing a lot of self reflecting and unintentionally forced myself to confront a lot of my trauma. I’m saying trauma a lot. I don’t want to get into depth about what I endured because it’s my business but people who do know me know how bad things were for me. I don’t want to feel like that again. I want to feel better, and I want to do better.

Sorry for the long read. That’s just how I feel.

#txt #suicide tw #self harm tw #I was very hesitant to discuss this because whenever I talk about mental health it leans into #one side. who are super well meaning but feel obligated to make sure that I’m okay. like I’m their responsibility when I’m just a stranger #online and my thoughts and feelings should never make someone feel like they have to ‘protect’ me #and another side who sees me purposefully be vague about some of the things I discuss like trauma and regret #and just construct their own narrative and get mad at me for it #at this point I’m just too tired to care about the potential backlash of the latter #if you read all this and think I’m saying I did nothing wrong and everyone is bad except for me that’s your fantasy you get to live in #I just want to be honest about my thoughts and feelings

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mamaestapa · 10 months

Text

Room For One More

•pairing : Joe Burrow x reader

•series summary: Y/n Hubbard, the younger sister of Cincinnati Bengals Defensive End Sam Hubbard, finds herself in a difficult situation after a steamy hookup with her brothers best friend, who just so happens to be the quarterback for the Bengals. In just nine months their lives will be changed forever. How will Y/n and Joe manage to to go through parenthood together? more so, how will Sam take the news he is going to be the uncle of his best friends baby?

•chapter summary: You and Joe take an important step to make sure your baby will always have both parents present. Soak in the sweet moments before the angst begins…

•word count: 3.3k

•warnings: pregnancy, fluff, mentions of confrontation and angst, mentions of sex, I think that's all?

series masterlist

————————————————————————

March 17, 2023

4 months pregnant

You did one last look through your apartment before you headed down to the front office of the complex to return your key. Today, you are moving out of your little one bedroom apartment in Cincinnati, and moving into a much bigger and better space.

That space being Joe's home.

That's right, you are moving in with Joe.

Joe asked you to move in with him when the two of you shared a moment with each other after the gender reveal party. Dancing to music with the sunset in the background brought out all of the emotions shared between you and Joe that day...

~7 days earlier~

Joe smiled down at you as you confessed your love to him. He felt his heart swell with joy at your words. It made him feel like he was 20 years old again, telling you how much he loved you at Ohio State.

Well, he never did get to tell you he loved you all those years ago. That moment was ripped away from Joe by your older brother...

But he has been, and always will be in love with you.

As "Crash Into Me" finished playing, the opening chords of Lifehouse's "Everything" began to play. You and Joe continued to sway along to the slow, soft music. The two of you cherishing the moment with just each other, and the little boy in your belly. As much as you enjoyed the moment, both of you knew there was still so much you had to talk about.

Your relationship status...well, you did just confess your love for one another. That's enough reassurance for now.

Sam not coming to the gender reveal...you'd be seeing him in a couple weeks for his wife Emma's baby shower anyways. You could confront him then.

The OSU situation the came to light that you have yet to discuss...that can be saved for another time. No need to ruin a perfect moment with something like that.

But Joe knew that right now, in the moment, there was something more important he needed to discuss with you than those three things.

“Y/n” Joe said softly, making you hum in response. The look on Joe’s face made you furrow your eyebrows slightly. His adam’s apple bobbed as he gulped nervously. Joe averted his gaze from yours, making you move your hand from behind his back to his shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze. Joe brought his gaze back to you as he smiled softly. He seemed like he had something to say, something important.

“What is it Joe?” You asked as you began to absentmindedly rub his shoulder with your thumb.

Joe sucked in a breath before giving you a look of apprehension. The look on his face was starting to concern you a bit.

He let out the breath he was holding before saying, “I was thinking a couple days ago. It’s just a thought and you don’t need to give me an answer yet.”

You cocked your head to the side, slightly confused, “Okay?…”

What was it that Joe could be so worried to talk to you about? You pondered as he had

“I want our baby—our son, to,” his hands traveled to the sides of your swollen tummy as he sighed, “to have both parents around in his life, all the time.”

“He will Joe, I-.”

“We don’t need to rush into anything—relationship wise that is, but I think it would be good if you,” he sighed, closing his mouth and deciding not to finish his thought.

You frowned, “Good if I what?”

“If you move in with me.” Joe finished, his mouth forming in a straight line and heart pounding in his chest as he waited anxiously for your response.

Your mouth fell open at his suggestion. Move in with him? That’s a pretty big step.

“You don’t have to, Y/n. I just thought-.”

“Okay.” You cut him off. You know it’s the right thing to do for your baby. Even if you and Joe aren’t together, it’s a good idea for your baby boy to have some stability in his life when it’s time for him to enter the world.

Joe’s breath hitched, “Yeah?”

A small smile pulled at your lips. “Yeah,” you nodded, “I’ll move in with you.”

~4 days later~

Moving your sunglasses up to your forehead and off of of your face, you took a deep breath as you knocked on the door in front of you. You stepped back from the door and crossed your arms over your chest, letting them rest on your belly. As you stood outside the door, you heard a muffled voice and heavy footsteps grow closer. The door swung open, Joe greeting you with a small smile as he dried his hair with a towel.

"Y/n, hi." He sounded a little shocked to see you.

"Hey Joe,"you smiled slightly, sucking in a breath and letting out a light laugh, "got room for one more?" you asked, gesturing to the car in the driveway full of your belongings. A grin broke out on Joe's face at your words. He was so excited for you to move in with him, spending late nights and early mornings cleaning the house and preparing rooms for both you and the baby.

"Yeah," he nodded, his smile growing, "I think I do."

You smiled in response, "Good because I've already packed everything up and i'm too lazy to move it all back to my apartment." Joe tossed is bath towel to the floor. He chuckled as he stepped onto the concrete and walked up to where you stood. Joe grabbed your hand, lacing his fingers with your as he walked with you to your car. You didn't have much, but you still had a significant amount of boxes piled into your car. You knew you wouldn't be able to carry everything in yourself, nor would Joe even allow you to do that. So it was nice to have Joe's help carrying in everything.

About four trips to the car and ten boxes later, all of your belongings were now inside of Joe's house.

Joe grunted as he picked up and placed the last box labeled "kitchen items" on the granite island. He wiped his forehead, "Phew," he breathed out, "that's the last one." You smiled, "Thank you for helping me."

Joe nodded, "It's no problem. I didn't want you to carry anymore than you already did at your apartment," he gestured to your bump, "I don't want you or the baby to get hurt." He cared so much for that little peanut growing in your belly. It just warmed your heart. Joe is going to be a great dad.

"Don't worry," you reassured Joe, "I had help from a really nice guy who lived down the hall from me. He happens to be an athletic trainer, so carrying all those boxes was nothing to him."

Joe scoffed, "I wish i could say the same..." he begrudgingly glanced at his biceps, "You've got a lot of stuff, Y/n." Joe finished as you reached out to touch his bicep. It was bulging out of his black compression shirt more than usual. "It looks like you're working on it though..." you trailed off, "you've got some more muscle than usual. I like it."

Joe just chuckled at you as you scrunched your nose up at him. Pulling your hand away you sighed softly. "But I know, I do. If it makes you feel any better though, I think you looked much better carrying those boxes than Ryan did." you said with a teasing smile. Joe just smiled sheepishly, "Thanks."

The air was tense as the two of you stood in Joe's kitchen, surrounded by boxes full of unpacked items and memories. As you stood together, Joe's blue eyes left yours, traveling down to your lips instead. His chest rose with a deep breath as he then brought his eyes back to yours again. The air was so tense in the moment as your breath hitched, expecting to feel Joe's lips on yours. Joe wanted to lean in for a kiss, but he held back, instead snapping out the moment as he nervously rubbed his palms on his shorts.

"So uh," he cleared his throat, "how about we unpack all this tomorrow?" he gestured to the boxed behind him. "I'm sure it's been an exhausting day for you, and you need rest."

As Joe said the word "rest", you yawned. You were pretty exhausted. Moving is a lot of work, especially when you're pregnant.

"Yeah" you said, rubbing your tired eyes, "sleep does sound pretty great right now." Joe chuckled as he nodded. He pushed himself off of the counter and waved you over as he exited the kitchen. "Follow me, I'll show you your room."

You followed Joe up the flight of stairs to where the bedrooms were. You followed him down the hallway, walking past his film room, an empty bedroom and his bedroom, before finally making it to the guest bedroom at the end of the hall. Joe stopped in front of the door, opening the door for you and letting you walk into the room before him.

"You're welcome to stay in the guest bedroom, but," his voice grew soft as he gestured down the hallway, " just know there's room in there too..."

Joe was referring to his bedroom. You gave him a teasing smirk as you said, "Your film room?" Joe rolled his eyes at your playful remark. "Duh." was all he said, making both of you chuckle softly. You thought it was sweet of him to offer his room to you too, but you figured you would stay in the guest bedroom.

It just makes things easier. For both you and Joe.

"I appreciate that, thank you." you said genuinely. You gestured to the queen sized bed with the dark gray comforter, "but I think I'll be fine in here."

Joe nodded, "Yeah, I just wanted to offer that space to you. What's mine is yours now, I guess." You smiled, "Yeah, I guess so."

It felt weird to be living in the same house as Joe. But it was a good weird. This was something you dreamed if years ago, and now that dream is finally coming true. And boy would Sam kill you if he found out...

Speaking of Sam, you still haven't talked to him since the night you told him that you're pregnant. You're still upset that he didn't show up at the gender reveal, and you know that Joe is just as upset as you are, too. However, the two of you will get to confront him in a few days.

His wife Emma is having her baby shower soon. She invited you and Joe, meaning you'll have to see Sam. Seeing Sam means you will finally get the opportunity to confront him about everything. His reaction to the baby...why he's been avoiding you and Joe...why he didn't show up to the gender reveal...why he was responsible for Joe leaving you behind all those years ago...

It all made you so angry. He's your brother. Your built in best friend. Why did he have to be such a dick about the whole situation? Yeah his best friend knocked you up, but Sam has done much shittier things to you and Joe.

If anyone should be the dick in this situation, it should be you and Joe. Not Sam.

But you have some piece of mind knowing that you will get the chance to confront him about everything in just a few days.

You and Joe stood in the guest bedroom that is now your bedroom, silence falling between the two of you. You glanced around the room, taking in the simplicity of it. The room was just like Joe's whole home. Simple and Cozy.

You couldn't help the yawn that escaped your lips as you looked longingly at the bed, ready for a good nights sleep in your new home.

Joe must have noticed your yawn because he couldn't help but chuckle at you before speaking up. "I'll let you get ready for bed." he said softly, giving you a small smile. You thanked him quietly as you moved to pull the covers down. You stopped yourself as you realized that all of your things were still sitting in their boxes downstairs in the kitchen. You didn't feel like going back downstairs to find your clothes, and you certainly didn't want Joe to either. You pulled your hand away from the bed, turning to look at Joe who had just stepped out of the bedroom.

"Hey Joe?" you called out. He stopped in his tracks and turned around, giving you a soft smile as he made eye contact with you. "Yeah?"

"I don't have anything to wear tonight. I mean I do, but, all of my stuff is still downstairs, and I don't really feel like going down there right now." you explained. Joe nodded, "I'll bring you a shirt."

You smiled, "Thanks Joe." He just smiled at you before turning back around, and continuing to walk down the hall to his bedroom. He returned a couple minutes later with a purple LSU t-shirt in his hand. He stood in the doorway, "Here," he said as he threw the t-shirt at you. "you can sleep in this tonight."him.

You caught the shirt, smiling softly at him as you did so, "Thanks, i'll be right back."

Joe nodded as you went to the bathroom to quickly change. After you finished changing, you went back into the bedroom. Joe was laying on the right side of the bed, scrolling through his phone. His head snapped up when he heard your footsteps on the vinyl floor. Joe smiled at the sight of you in his t-shirt. It reminded him of the morning after your hookup. What great memories...

Joe looked up at you with his soft blue eyes as he patted the left side of the bed. You walked over to the bed and carefully sat down next to him. Once you were comfortable, Joe sat up against the headboard. His eyes made their way to your lower tummy.

"Awe," he crooned, "look at that." he smiled, pointing to your clothed abdomen. You looked down, smiling when you saw the tiny baby bump poke through the shirt you were wearing. When you were standing, the shirt hung loosely on your body. But while you were sitting up in bed, it hugged your small bump. You brought your hand down to your belly, stroking over the fabric of Joe's shirt. You let the palm of your hand rest against the side of your belly as you grabbed Joe's right hand, gently placing it on the side opposite of yours. Joe smiled as he stroked your swollen tummy with his thumb, giving his unborn child a hello. The moment making your heart swell with so much love and happiness. You would stay like this forever if you could.

You closed your eyes, humming in content, "I could stay like this forever." Joe hummed in response, "Mhm, me too."

The two of you sat in your bed for a few more minutes, both of your hands sprawled out over your bump as Joe spoke to his son. He finished talking to the baby boy, giving your tummy a soft kiss before pulling away and getting out of your bed.

"You should get some sleep." he said softly, "come get me if you need anything, OK?" You nodded, a warm smile on your face as you said, "I will. I think I'll be fine though."

You and Joe bid each other goodnight, both of you going your separate ways for the night. You turned on the ceiling fan above the bed and turned the lights off before you crawled into bed. As soon as you were comfortable, you placed a hand on the middle of your bump and closed your eyes, trying your best to fall fast asleep.

You promised Joe you would be fine...but you weren't.

A couple hours had passed and all you had done was restlessly toss and turn, with your eyes wide open. You couldn't seem to get comfortable enough to fall asleep. Huffing out a sigh, you sat up in bed and grabbed your phone from the bedside table. You let out a groan as you read the time.

1:19.

You let out another sigh as you pulled your phone off of the charger. You pulled the covers off of your body and got out of bed. You didn't want to bother Joe, but you knew you wouldn't get any sleep tonight if you didn't. The truth is, you just didn't want to be alone. You wanted someone to hold you close tonight. You wanted that someone to be Joe. You reluctantly walked down the hallway, stopping in his doorway as you saw Joe's face lit up from the screen of his phone. He looked so comfortable and at peace as he just laid in bed. Part of you felt guilty for disturbing him, but at the same time, he did tell you to come get him if you needed anything, and you did need something...

You took a deep breath before you spoke, "Joe?"

Joe reached over and turned the bedside lamp on, his face immediately etched with concern as he noticed you standing in his doorway.

"Are you OK? Is something wrong with the baby?" He asked, reaching for the covers and getting ready to jump out of bed. You shook your head, "I'm fine, so is the baby." you reassured, smiling slightly as you noticed his shoulders and face both immediately relax at your reassurance. "I just can't sleep is all." You said, voice barely above a whisper. Joe frowned as he gazed at you. His eyes fell to your middle. He sighed softly as he reached over to pull the covers down on the other side of his bed.

"C'mere." was all Joe said. You smiled softly at him as you cautiously made your way over to his bed. You laid down next to Joe as he leaned to the side to turn the lamp off. Once you were both laying in bed, Joe pulled the covers up over both of your bodies.

"You comfy?" he asked. You nodded as you closed your tired eyes, "Yeah."

A couple minutes of silence passed before Joe spoke again, "Do you need anything."

You opened your eyes, debating on what to say. You could lie and say "no" or you could tell him the truth.

"Just you." You said quietly in response. You felt Joe shift next to you as soon as the words left your mouth. He brought himself closer to your body, slowly bringing an arm down to your waist. He gently pulled you close to him, holding you against his body. The hand on your waist migrating over to the middle of your tummy. This felt so right. For both you and Joe.

"Better?" he asked. You hummed, putting your hand over his as you closed your eyes. "Much."

You could hear the smile in his voice as he said, "Good."

"Good night, Joe." You said quietly. Joe squeezed you gently in his warm embrace, "Good night, Y/n. Sleep well."

With that the two of you fell asleep in each others arms. Neither one of you even knowing about the craziness that was about to impact your lives in a few days...

hey loves!!

first of all i want to apologize for how rushed and bad this was lol. definitely not my best work! BUT it is just a filler chapter.

there’s some pretty angsty/crazy/heavy stuff coming very soon, so be prepared and like i said, soak up all the sweet moments in this series while you can…

i’m so sorry this took me forever to update. i had a little writers block with it, but i knew i just needed to push through it! thank you for your continued love and support. it means so much to me!!🤍🤍

tags: @dandelionwrites8 @joeburreauxsworld @theflawedwriter @mrsshiesty @ann288 @ijustcrypretty @theoneandonlyfanz @wickedfun9 @venus-b @hummusxx @stainednailpolishremover @a-moment-captured @alternativemadchen @erinmartin1987 @sirlewisworld @kkrenae @unhingedfangirl @sublimemusic-rebel @meameagirl @ilovejoeburroww @hallecarey1 @j-worlds-blog @blinkloverx3 @jordyn14 @kristencochefski1125 @ryiamarie @unsaidjaelinrose @sinners-98-world @ozwriterchick @hearts4papayas @emherb10

#joe burrow #joe burrow x reader #joe burrow x y/n #joe burrow x you #joe burrow fanfiction #joe burrow series #daddy issues #dad joe

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