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#Erin…. look what you turned me into
frankielucky · 2 years
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ITS @thirteenyasmin BIRTHDAY WHICH MAKES IT NATIONAL CHENRICH DAY !!
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so-i-did-this-thing · 11 months
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How it's going as a trans person in Florida: Planned Parenthood, 26Health, and Spektrum Health have announced they have paused all gender affirming care.
To recap, DeSantis signed several anti-trans bills into law this week. Care is banned for minors, care is all but banned for adults, Don't Say Gay has been extended, children can be kidnapped from affirming parents by non-affirming family, and there is a bathroom bill that subjects trans folks to arrest for using government owned facilities, such as those in courthouses, airports, many stadiums and parks.
The adult effective ban was felt immediately. The main elements are:
signing at every visit an in-person informed consent form created by the state
all care come from physicians instead of nurse practitioners
no telemed for gender-affirming care
Currently, it is unknown if existing HRT prescriptions written by NPs will be honored by pharmacies. I personally know one person who was able to pick up testosterone yesterday, but I have also read many reports of folks being denied. I myself don't have a refill ready for another 10 days and will report back after I try my own pickup.
What's additionally dangerous is those of us, myself included, who get non-HRT prescriptions from our gender clinics now face the uncertainty of continuing of *all* of our medical care. Our health clinics are at risk of shuttering permanently as they lose major income, and many of us will lose STD meds, depression meds, heart meds, etc, etc.
When we say "this will kill us," it goes beyond suicide risk from forced detransition.
"But you can still get HRT from a physician."
So many suck or are outright hostile and the demand outstrips the supply. Before I found my NP-run clinic, one physician just decided to not call in my Rx, another was so shit at reading lab results, he thought I had hepatitis, and the third I had to threaten to kick in the teeth for trying to force too large a speculum in me.
Also, the state-required consent form has not been finalized and distributed yet, so at this point, everything has pretty much ground to a halt.
It was estimated that 80% of trans adults would lose their healthcare because of how many use providers like Planned Parenthood, but the impact seems even greater now.
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"You can get your non-gender care elsewhere still."
DeSantis recently signed a bill that allows healthcare professionals to discriminate against trans people.
Sure, we can try to find care elsewhere, but it will be a slow and expensive process, with no guarantees. It took me over 20 years to get my heart condition treated because of transphobic doctors.
What can I do as a trans Floridian?
Stay in communication with your clinic - many are working on getting physicians added to the roster to prescribe HRT. Lawsuits are being filed and it's possible the changes to adult care can be rolled back.
Continue to try to pick up your meds, but begin looking for care elsewhere, though. Inside and outside the state.
Remember that while telemed for gender affirming care has been banned, you can still cross state lines for care. See Erin's map of informed consent clinics.
Many people will turn to DIY, but be sure you are aware of the risks here, especially if on testosterone, which is a controlled substance.
What should I be worried about next as a trans Floridian?
I worry about the following next steps towards genocide:
Banning getting care out of state. This is from the anti-abortion playbook. They will likely start with kids again, but we've seen how quickly adult care gets axed.
Being declared mentally incompetent or a risk in some way. This could be anything from being barred from gun ownership to not being allowed to work for the government.
Being declared a de facto predator. This has already happened with the latest bathroom law (cis people can eject trans people from government owned single-gender facilities, with arrest as a penalty), so watch out for it being applied to privately-owned facilities. Watch for discussions of official lists of trans people.
Gender presentation enforcement laws, essentially banning "cross dressing". Laws that block or rollback documentation changes.
These all have historic precedence and are huge "I'm in danger" red flags.
What can I do as a cis person?
Amplify all this news. Talk frankly about how this is genocide. And donate what you can to trans mutual aid campaigns so people can travel to get healthcare or even leave the state.
Here's some articles to get started on building awareness:
Take care, everyone, of yourself and each other.
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piedinthepiper · 5 months
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You owe me ☆
Mafia!Jungkook x psychologist!reader
Summary: It’s your job to help people, but is he really suffering? At least it’s a case of the crazy and obsessive syndrome.
Warnings: yandere!Jungkook, dub con, guilt tripping, description of murder and crime, mention of stalking, cursing, weapons (one singular gun), mention of male masturbation, descriptive smut, probably wrong use of psychological terms (oopsie)
Wc: 6.9k
A/n: This is my first post on my bts fic blog! If you like it please show your support! Don’t be a silent reader! My requests are open, share your ideas!
Disclaimer: This is 100% fiction. I am in no way saying that this is how any member of bts would act. Nor do I condone the actions detailed in the story. This is purely for entertainment purposes only. If any of the warnings trigger you, or you’re under 18 ¡do not read! I’m not your mother, and I don’t take any accountability for what you decide to read online!
Another disclaimer: I am not a licensed psychologist! Everything related to psychology in this fic is off Google, do not use this to diagnose yourself or anyone else!
Parts: | 1 | 2 |
He clutched the gun close to his chest. Hiding it under his pyjamas. His fathers words ringing in the back of his mind. “Your brother is too soft for this industry, but you son, you’re my perfect descendant.”
He walked into his family’s suite. It was dark, except for one light in the living room. His mother sat there head propped up on her hand reading a book.
“What are you doing up so late, baby?”
She asked, putting the book down in her lap and taking off her reading glasses. He looked over at the white sofa placed next to the large windows. His brother was sleeping there peacefully. Not aware of his presence.
“I let your brother sleep in the living room tonight. His nightmares have returned.”
She continued when he didn’t answer her. He slowly turned his eyes towards his mother again.
“Weak.”
He answered lowly. Her look turned concerned.
“Is something wrong, baby?
His eyes continued to stare at her. He didn’t move a muscle, not yet.
“You know I don’t like it when you look at me like that.”
She continued when he yet again didn’t answer. There was a sturdiness to her voice now. The kind of sturdiness mothers have before scolding you. He started smiling. Not in a sweet innocent way. Not in the way 11 year olds should. But in a sinister and dark way. His hand moved out of his pyjamas top. She looked at the object in his hand.
“Drop that gun right now, Jungkook!”
A scream. Three shots. And silence.
15 years later
“Your patient is here.”
Your assistant, Erin, said through the slightly ajar door to your office. You looked up from your lunch. Quickly glancing over at the stationary computer to check the time.
“I don’t have an appointment. Not in another thirty minutes.”
Erin looked back to the waiting room before slowly stepping inside the office. Closing the door quietly behind her. She walked closer to you.
“He’s been sitting here for an hour already. I told him his appointment wasn’t until 1 pm. He just said ‘I know’ and sat down.”
She hurriedly whispered afraid of whoever was sitting out there.
“Please, Erin. Don’t act like he’s crazy. Send him in, I’ll eat later.”
She gave you a look before holding up two fingers. The signal that the two of you created. Working as a psychologist you meet with all sorts of people. Even criminals. The signal signalised that she would call the police if you hit the button that called directly to the front desk.
“Stop it, there will be no need to call the police. He’s harmless.”
“If you say so.”
She shrugged and walked out the door. The next time it opened a familiar figure entered.
“Good afternoon, Doctor.”
“You’re early Mr. Jeon.”
You had been treating Jungkook Jeon for a little over a month now. And you had come to the conclusion that he had PTSD, post-traumatic stress disorder. After he had witnessed a series of murders and crimes during his childhood. He was vague about the past, but a few things came out here and there. You only knew about his absent father and that his brother and mother had both been killed. No description of how or when. Which is common at first. It’s hard to re-live your trauma.
“I’m sorry I disturbed your lunch. Just eat, I don’t mind.”
He said as he sat down in the white sofa across your desk. You gave him a small smile as you reached into your drawer.
“Don’t worry about me, I’ll eat after our session.”
You said as you fished his file up and opened it on you desk. You quickly read your notes from the last session as you continued talking.
“How are you doing? Still having nightmares?”
You looked up from the file maintaining eye contact as he answered your question.
“Sometimes, but not as often as before. I dream of you instead now.”
His eyes never left yours as he bit his lip, playing with his piercing he had there. You nodded.
“How often do you dream about me? And what are the dreams about?”
You asked as you scribbled it down in your notes.
“Every now and then they occur. Especially after our sessions. Or after I read your books. You’re a good writer Dr. y/l/n.”
He started smiling. His smile wasn’t sweet, it was different from how he had smiled at you before.
“As for what they’re about, I don’t think you’d want to know, Doctor.”
You tried concealing your confusion at his last statement. Curiosity taking over you.
“Dreaming about people you frequently surround yourself with is not uncommon. If you don’t like to talk about it we don’t have to. I would just like to know if they’re good or bad dreams.”
He nodded, still not breaking his smile nor the eye contact.
“Oh they’re good, Doctor. Don’t worry.”
You smiled back at him.
“That’s good to know. I’m glad to hear your nightmares are slowly being changed with good dreams.”
It went silent for a moment as you wrote down the good news. When you looked up again he wasn’t looking at you anymore, and for some reason you felt relived. His eyes were big and doe like, and when they focused on you for too long you would sometimes feel uneasy. You wondered so what those eyes had experiences in the past.
“What about your sudden outbreaks, are you able to control your anger better?”
He focused on you again the second he heard your voice. His smile returned.
“Sort of, I’ve been letting out the aggression in the gym, after you adviced me to try to stay active. I’ve started boxing.”
You smiled and nodded, writing down boxing in your notes.
“That’s good to hear. It seems that you’re getting better Mr. Jeon, much b-“
“Jungkook, call me Jungkook.”
He interrupted. You stopped and looked at him for a second.
“And no, I’m not cured. I still need you.”
You slowly nodded.
“Well there is no cure for your diagnosis, it’s a matter of being at peace with living with it. But I can understand that you still have things you would want to talk about. Maybe you would like to open up to me about your past?”
The room grew quiet. His eyes now focused on his hands in his lap. His demeanour changed completely.
“I have told you about my past. If I didn’t you wouldn’t have been able to diagnose me in the first place.”
He answered with a bit of underlaying annoyance. You sighed. Something felt off, but you couldn’t figure out what.
“You have told me some parts yes. If you want to go more in detail you can, I’m not forcing you. As your psychologist I would advise talking about it with me. It could be nice to have an outsiders perspective.”
You said in a soft tone. Trying to get your point across at the same time as being gentle. You didn’t want him to feel pressured or as if he had to say anything. When he didn’t open his mouth you understood you crossed his personal line of what he feels fit for you to know. You spoke after almost a minute with silence.
“It’s fine. You don’t have to. You can think about-“
“You’re a smart one.”
He interrupted you again. His eyes raised to meet yours.
“That’s why I like you. You know to some extent what is going on inside my head. I could never do that. I never know what is going on inside your head. If you think I’m weak or even crazy.”
“I don’t think you’re crazy nor weak. It’s not your job to know what is going on inside my head. But it is my job to know what’s going on inside yours.”
He nodded before patting the sofa seat beside him.
“Come here.”
He simply said. You don’t know why, but you had a bad feeling in your stomach. He was acting differently today, compared to other sessions. Either way you got up from your chair, knowing that doing what he said would get you an insight of what you wanted to know. You slowly walked around your desk and sat down in the small sofa next to him. You crossed your legs trying your best not to get too close to him, but he seemed to man spread even more. Making your thighs touch. You placed your notebook in your lap, ready to write down exactly what he told you. He took a hold of your wrist.
“You’re not writing this down, Doctor. I need your full attention.”
It was the first time he had touched you, beside the first time you met when you shook hands. It made you think that you usually never have any sort of physical contact with your patients. Maybe that’s exactly what they need. What he needs to open up to you. You put your notebook down, and continued holding his hand. He looked down at your hands intertwining. Your smooth small hand was a sharp contrast to his bigger tattooed one.
“Tell me whatever you feel comfortable with telling me.”
You said to get his attention back to reality. He went quiet for a few seconds.
“I grew up in a hotel. It was a nice hotel, four stars, good breakfast. My father was almost never home, I didn’t mind though. I had my mother and my brother there. It was perfect in the beginning.”
He stopped. You looked down at his hand, it was shaking. You started drawing small circles at the back of his hand. Trying to calm him down. He looked down at your hands again.
“One night when I was sleeping I was woken up by a loud bang. The door to our home was broken down. A man entered and started shooting. My brother was still sleeping on the sofa and died instantly. My mother reached her gun and shot the man in the shoulder.”
He looked into your eyes.
“But he shot her in the head.”
You nodded, looking down at the floor. You knew he was looking at you, but you couldn’t meet his eyes in that moment.
“Did you find out who that man was? Why he would do such a thing.”
He went quiet again at your question. His grip on your hand tightened, as if what he was going to say would make you pull away.
“He was a mobster. Like my father. After the incident he trained me as the next leader of his group. I was 11.”
You looked at him. His childhood was worse than you thought, but he wasn’t saying all this as if it was a traumatic experience. It seemed like he was bragging about it. You would have to go through your notes and his file after work to see if there was something you were missing about him. You couldn’t jump to conclusions just yet.
“Thank you for telling me.”
You smiled at him. He looked back at you with those big eyes. You looked at the watch on your wrist. The session was over.
“Look at the time.”
You were about to let go of his hand to get up from the sofa. But he grabbed you harder. Forcing you to sit still.
“I’m sorry, Mr. Jeon. But our session is over-“
“I’ve told you to call me Jungkook.”
“Jungkook, I have other patients today as well. We can continue this next week.”
You tried to assure him. He still didn’t let go.
“I’ve never told anyone about this, and you decide to end the session this quickly?”
You grabbed his hand with your other hand as well.
“You know I usually don’t end sessions like this. But I can’t let my other patients wait. You’re free to sit in the waiting room for as long as you want to.”
He frowned at your comment, but relaxed his hand nonetheless. You got off the sofa and walked to your desk again. Before you could say anything else he got up from the sofa and hastily walked out the door. Slamming it shut behind him.
You had two more patients that day. You waved goodbye to your last patient of the day, a young girl named Olive Thomson who was suffering from severe anxiety, as she walked through the door. You got up from your chair and collected your things. You turned off the computer and the light. You made sure to lock the door as you always do. The only thing you had to do now was say goodbye to Erin by the front desk, and you could go home. You walked into the waiting room.
“Finally.”
You turned to find the owner of the voice, as it was clearly not Erin’s.
“Mr. Jeon what are you doing here?”
You asked as you looked at the man seated in one of the waiting chairs.
“I told him he had to leave, I promise.”
You heard Erin whisper behind you.
“You said I could sit here for as long as I wanted to, Doctor. And please, just call me Jungkook.”
He was clearly upset. You remembered your words from earlier, but you didn’t think he would spend almost four hours just sitting there.
“I did, you’re right. I’m leaving now, Erin will be here for another two hours. But after that we’re closed.”
He got up from the chair.
“I was waiting for you.”
He simply said.
“I’m sorry our session ended so brutally, but I promise we’ll talk about it next week.”
You said and patted his shoulder as you walked past him towards the exit.
“Goodbye, Erin!”
You said as you made your way outside. The wind was cold and you clutched your coat closer to you as you walked towards your car.
“The least you can do is eat with me.”
He had followed you outside. You turned to look at him.
“I’m not that hungry, I just want to go home.”
You was going to open your car door, but his hand suddenly blocked the door. You were about to cuss him out. Tired of his antics.
“You haven’t eaten all day, I hardly doubt that one bite you had for lunch filled you up.”
He sounded threatening, something he had started to do recently.
“I just want to hear your thoughts on what I said. Don’t you think you owe me that? Or do I have to wait a week and dread finding out your opinion of me?”
He was desperate, you could see it. What he was saying was true. He would walk around overthinking for the next week and his health could worsen. You had to take action according to your diagnosis.
“Ok, I’ll eat with you.”
The two of you were sitting at some restaurant. The lights were low and to everyone around you, the two of you looked like a couple on a date. This was obviously not something you would do with your patients, you like to keep things professional. Something about this whole situation felt anything but professional.
“Get whatever you want, my treat.”
He said deeply focused on the menu. You shook your head.
“No thank you, I can pay for my own food.”
You answered.
“I’m the one responsible for you not being able to eat your lunch right? You owe me this meeting and I owe you food. Two birds with one stone.”
You sighed when you didn’t have a rebuttal. The two of you ordered, and the silence grew more and more awkward.
“I’m sorry again, Mr. Jeon I’m-“
“Jungkook. Please y/n! Just call me Jungkook!”
He was clearly upset now. You were a bit taken aback from the sudden use of your first name. He had never called you by your first name before. And the feeling of the professionalism fading away became more apparent.
“I’m sorry. I’ll try to remember your request.”
“Say it. Say my name.”
For some reason you didn’t feel like you had it in you. It felt so strange to call a patient by their name, the same way it felt weird to be called your name by a patient.
“Jungkook.”
You managed to get it out, but you couldn’t look him in the eye saying it. The food luckily came quickly, you were starving. Plus it saved you from whatever he was going to answer. You decided to take the lead. Wanting to stay on track for the actual reason you said yes to join him.
“You said your father was a mobster. Do you know if he’s still living that lifestyle? Do you have any contact with him?”
You asked after taking a big bite of your pasta. Jungkook swallowed before answering your question.
“My father is dead. He’s been dead for 7 years now.”
A question came to mind, but you didn’t know if you dared ask him. You remember he said his father trained him to the life of crime at a young age. For him to take over his fathers legacy. With his father gone he would be next in line to whatever group his father had built. He got the image. Tattoos, piercings, the black clothes. But you couldn’t imagine him being a mafia boss. Maybe it was some sort of stereotype that strong, tough men don’t go to the psychologist. But you were starting to rethink his intentions.
“You’re thinking about something.”
You looked up from your food. He was staring at you.
“Look at you, you do have the ability to understand my mind.”
You said lightheartedly. He chuckled.
“I think you’re brave. Not many people survive the kind of neglect and trauma you’ve experienced in your childhood.”
You said, trying to give him an answer for his entire life story. He nodded and suddenly reached for your hand across the table. You jumped, but didn’t remove your hand. You didn’t want to make a scene with this many people around.
“I’m fine, y/n. I think the only cure I need is you.”
His statement combined with his eyes staring into your soul, gave you chills down your back. Something was off about him. You had to ask. You just had to.
“When your father died, did you…?”
He smiled. The same sinister smile he smiled at you earlier that day.
“I did. I took over his legacy. Me and my father were actually great friends the years before he died. Not that I cared for him. I don’t think I’ve ever cared for anyone in my entire life.”
Another shot of chills froze your body at his statement. You had overlooked it this entire time. His calm demeanour, his tendency to physically violence, his intelligence and charisma and now his lack of empathy. He didn’t suffer from PTSD, he had been lying this entire time.
“At least not until I met you.”
He interrupted your thoughts. You pulled your hand out of his quickly. You took a deep breath trying to compose yourself.
“That’s nonsense. You must’ve cared for your mother.”
He shrugged.
“Not really, she wasn’t exactly the best mother.”
“You don’t really have those nightmares do you?”
You asked, looking at him. It took him a few seconds to answer. Probably contemplating if he should continue his lies or tell the truth.
“I don’t.”
“You didn’t really have a problem with your mother or brother dying either right?”
He let out a small laugh.
“I just told you.”
“Just answer me.”
He poked his tongue into his cheek and leaned forward onto the table.
“What is this? Are you trying to diagnose me, Doctor?”
He said mockingly.
“Answer me.”
You commanded. He sighed and started smiling at you again.
“Everyone has to die at some point. Doesn’t matter when or how.”
You nodded. Your instinct was true.
“You don’t have PTSD, you have ASPD.”
He licked his lips and cocked his head.
“And what does that mean, Doctor?”
“You’re a sociopath.”
He looked taken aback from your bluntness for a second. He probably wasn’t expecting you to crack his code.
“You’ve lied this entire time for your own personal gain. I must admit your acting was really good. But my question is, what do you want?”
He was quiet for a second. You knew he was fighting a war on the inside.
“I really underestimated you y/n. I knew you were smart, but personally I don’t think PhDs make a person smart by default. You’ve really proven yourself to me.”
“My efforts were not made to impress you. You think too highly of yourself Mr. Jeon.”
His gaze switched, you had aggravated him. Not only by calling him by his last name, but by attacking his self image.
“Why don’t you come home with me, we can continue our conversation there.”
You shook your head, and arranged the cutlery neatly by the side of your half empty plate.
“I do not go home with patients, and I definitely do not go home with mobsters. You have already challenged my professionalism by taking me out to eat.”
He smirked.
“What if I stop being your patient? In all honesty I don’t really need your advice, Doctor.”
You grabbed your bag and got up from your seat.
“In all honesty I think you do. We will continue this conversation in my office next week. Good night Mr. Jeon.”
With that you walked away from the table. Not looking back.
The next few days you were on edge. Constantly overthinking everything that had happened that day with Jungkook. You almost wanted to call in sick. Terrified of what would happen next. But regardless of that you had to continue working. You couldn’t let your other patients get affected by whatever was going on with you. You said goodbye to Mrs. Humphrey. An elderly woman that had fallen into depression after her husband had passed. Once the door closed you fetched your lunch out of your bag. You didn’t feel like eating, but you knew you had to. If not your energy would be drained at the end of the day. After the first bite you started hearing noises outside. Erin was almost yelling outside your door. You stood up, wanting to investigate what the commotion was. Before you could take one step the door swung open. And there he stood, your nightmare for the last couple of days.
“I told him you were busy, Dr. y/l/n! I told him he couldn’t enter!”
Erin said hopelessly behind him. He was soaking wet from the rain. His hair plastered itself to his forehead. And his black shirt did the same to his abdomen. He didn’t move, he was just staring at you with a furious look in his eyes.
“It’s fine, Erin. I’ll handle this.”
Erin looked at Jungkook worriedly before looking back to you. She held up two fingers. You nodded, and she left.
“Sit.”
You said, as you yourself sat down behind your desk. He closed the door behind him, but didn’t sit down. He continued to lure near the door.
“You interrupt my lunch again, I don’t want this to become a habit.”
“Please, spear me the bullshit.”
He said, and you went quiet. Wanting him to say whatever he came here for.
“How did you do it?”
He said after some time. You looked confused at him. Not understanding what he was referring to.
“Did what?”
You asked in almost a sharp tone. You were annoyed. He let out a small laugh, it almost sounded like a sneer.
“You’re cute when you’re angry with me.”
He started slowly walking towards you.
“But I need to know how you did it, y/n.”
He stopped once he reached the end of your desk. You looked up at him.
“What did I do?”
You ask again. He puts his palms on the table and lean closer to you. You don’t move, trying to prove to him and yourself that you’re not scared.
“You figured out a side of me I never understood I had. If I, the person that’s bearing this disease didn’t know. How come you knew?”
You leaned back in your seat and crossed your arms. He was clearly distressed. Maybe even more than what you had been for the last days. And for some reason it pleased you.
“I told you, this is what I do. This is my job.”
You could tell he was conflicted in what to do next. You could practically see the way the wheels were turning inside his head. But eventually he sat down.
“I studied the human mind for six years to be able to understand things not even you are aware of.”
He scowled at you as you talked to him in a harsh tone.
“I’ve done research, and I’ve written books about this, that you have read may I add. What made you think that I wasn’t capable?”
He didn’t answer. The two of you just stared at each other.
“This is not a session, I demand answers, Jungkook.”
His eyes lit up when he heard his name fall off your tongue.
“Like I said, I underestimated you.”
He answered short.
“You didn’t answer my other question.”
You stated. He looked confused at you.
“The question from the other night. What do you want?”
He started laughing. You did not find it funny, and watched him as his fit of laughter died down.
“Y/n, you can’t be serious! You’re telling me that you were able to diagnose me with some bullshit, while I was pretending to be something else. But you’re not able to see the fact that I want you.”
The room got quiet. For the first time in a long time you felt completely speechless. He moved to get up from the sofa, but stopped the second he saw you roll your chair further away from him. He could tell you were afraid now, there was no point in acting tough.
“Come here.”
He said with a smirk and patted his thigh this time. There was still fight in you though.
“You’re disgusting.”
You uttered. He sneered at your comment.
“You’ve exploited me for your own satisfaction this entire time.”
You looked strictly at him, as he sighed.
“What was I supposed to do? You’re constantly on my mind. Day and night. And it’s awful!”
“That’s called an obsession.”
“I know what it’s called!”
He bit back. You went quiet, waiting for him to give you more information.
“The only way I can get a break is after i come to the thought of you. It usually takes around three times until I’m too tired to think of you.”
You couldn’t hide your disgust from your facial expression anymore. Looking at him as if he was a rat on the street.
“And then I thought if that helps, the real deal would help even more.”
He got up from the sofa now. You stayed seated, your hand slowly moving across your desk towards the telephone.
“I need you, y/n.”
You broke eye contact and looked down to hit the right number for the front desk. Jungkook quickly understood what happened and pushed the stationary phone off the desk. It fell to the floor with a bang, breaking it on impact. You got up quickly, wanting to distance yourself from him.
“How did you know? About the phone, about me. We never met before our sessions. Why? I don’t understand.”
You blurted out in pure stress of the situation. He smiled as he started walking towards the side of the desk. You walked the other way, wanting to keep the desk between the two of you. He chuckled.
“You’re cute when you’re confused too.”
You continued walking backwards. Trying to keep as much distance from him, while he tries to close it.
“I’ve followed you for a long time, baby. A very long time.”
The two of you had walked an entire round around the desk now. He jumped down onto the sofa again. His hand gracing the sofa cushions beside him.
“Do you want to know the full story?”
You knew what he was hinting at. Your entire body was screaming not to get anywhere near him. But you needed to know. He didn’t have anything to hold back now, you were certain he would tell you the truth. So you walked towards the sofa, carefully sitting down beside him. You took a second to compose yourself before looking at him. Signalising that’s you were ready. He smiled.
“I have known you since we both were children. Your father was my brothers shrink. He´s the one that had PTSD. I saw you for the first time in the hotel lobby after your father had finished his session with my brother. You were maybe 6 and sat there for so long, waiting for your father to return. When I saw you, I knew we were meant to be. We were soulmates. And for the first time in my life I felt something for someone.”
He grabbed your hand. You quickly out of reflex tried to wiggle yourself out of his grip. He tugged your hand harshly towards him and your entire upper body followed. Without your hand to catch you, you fell straight into his chest. His other hand sneaked around your waist as you composed yourself.
“Let me go.”
You said annoyed, placing your hand on his chest to keep a distance.
“If you want to hear the rest, you have to play by my rules, baby.”
His eyes focused on your lips as he whispered to you. You shook your head.
“I don’t need to know the rest. I can make out the sob story on my own. Boy falls in love, boy doesn’t get girl.”
He shook his head and let go of your waist. You quickly sat back up, brushing off imaginary dust from your lap.
“You should show me some respect.”
He said with a serious tone. You rolled your eyes and crossed your eyebrows.
“I’m not scared of you.”
He chuckled at your comment, placing his hand around the back of the sofa.
“I don’t want you to be scared of me either. I just think that you should show the man you owe your life to some respect.”
He touched your shoulder, drawing small circles on your jumper.
“I don’t owe you anything.”
He smirked.
“Oh, but you do. I made you the person you are today. Without me you wouldn’t be here.”
You sighed tiredly at him.
“You’re unbelievable.”
You got up from your seat and walked back to your desk. Starting to pack up your stuff. You were so done with him. He needed help, but you would no longer treat him. You decided as much.
“I need to get out of here, if you’re not gone when I’m back I’ll call the police.”
You put your bag over your shoulder, ready to walk away.
“How did you get into Yale, Doctor?”
He asked out of the blue. You stopped in your tracks.
“What? Why?”
He shrugged.
“Just seems so weird that someone with your grades would be able to attend any Ivy League school. Don’t you agree?”
You went quiet. Not knowing where he wanted this conversation to go.
“And don’t you think it’s weird how you always got A’s even when you were out partying instead of studying?”
You thought back to the years when you were studying. You originally did only apply to Yale just because your father went there. You didn’t think you actually was going to make it, because your grades were mediocre.
“What are you saying?”
“You have no idea how many people I had to blackmail to get you there. How many men I had follow you constantly. How many professors I had to bribe to make them give you a good grade. I’ve spent millions on you, y/n!”
Your mind was racing. You didn’t understand anything. Was your entire life a lie?
“I have to give it to you. Your first book made it without my help. But when you came out with your second book, and it wasn’t a success right away. I bought almost half the copies and payed a hefty amount of money to make it a New York Times best seller.”
You dropped your bag in awe. What he was saying made a lot of sense. You started rethinking every significant moment in your life. Wondering if he was behind it all. He got up from his seat and started moving towards you. But this time you didn’t step back. You let him come close to you.
“I’ve done so much for you, baby. Why are you so ungrateful?”
You looked up at him. He was now standing right in front of you. So close that you could almost feel his breath on your skin.
“I didn’t ask you to do any of this. You can’t keep me in debt for something I-“
You struggled with continuing the sentence. The reality of his words hit you, and your tears threatened to spill.
“It’s ok, baby. I’m not asking for much, considering what I’ve given you.”
He whispered calmly. His hands found your waist. He took one step closer to you and placed his forehead against yours.
“All I want is you, right here on this sofa, showing me how grateful you are.”
You couldn’t hold your tears in anymore, letting them slowly drip down your cheeks. One of his hands abandoned your waist to wipe away the hot tears on your cheek. You looked into his eyes as he continued to hold your face.
“If I do it, will you leave me alone?”
His eyes focus on your lips and how close you were. He had never been this close to you.
“I can never leave you. You’re my soulmate.”
He simply answered. You looked down at the floor.
“Jungkook, you’re delusional. You have to stop.”
“How can I stop? Huh? You’re the only one that matters in my life!”
You continued looking at the floor, even when he pushed himself off you in his fit of rage.
“I fucking love you!”
You shook your head, looking up at him this time.
“You don’t love me! You don’t even know me! You’ve created this illusion in your head that we are meant to be, but we’re not!”
You yelled back at him angrily.
“You’ve interfered in my life when I didn’t ask you to! You don’t have the right to do that!”
“And where would you be without me?”
He argued back.
“You act like you don’t care! But you know that without my help you wouldn’t be anything. You would’ve been a nobody.”
His words stung. What he was saying was the truth. The hard truth. You would have never made it to college. Never gotten this job. Never been a successful author. Never followed in your fathers footsteps and made him proud. You heard Jungkook sigh.
“I’m sorry baby, but it’s the truth.”
He said dejectedly. You took a deep breath. Realising what you had to do.
“I’ll do it.”
You simply said and met his eyes.
“I’ll have sex with you once, but after this I need you to stop.”
“Baby-“
“Listen to me! I’ll find you another psychologist. I want you to go to there and get help. When your treatment is over-“
You stopped for a second. Contemplating if you wanted to commit to the promise you were about to make.
“I’ll meet you again. To talk. I can’t promise you more than that.”
His eyes lit up and he swiftly lifted you in a hug. Letting out small sounds of excitement and shaking you around a little. You couldn’t help but smile at his boyish action. After a moment he put you down again, but continued to hold your waist.
“I’ll do whatever you say, baby. I’ll do anything for you.”
Your hands found his strong chest. You kept the eye contact, but your eyes couldn’t help but flick down to his lips for a split second. And that’s all he needed to kiss you. It started slow, but quickly got hotter. Your hands slid around his neck, unconsciously pulling him deeper into the kiss. He stepped backwards. You were taken aback by the sudden movement, but followed his lead. He guided the two of you to the sofa. The same sofa he had sat in every time he came to your sessions. He broke the kiss to jump down on the sofa. He looked up at you with nothing but lust in his eyes. He had been waiting for this for many years, and finally he had you. He reached out for you as you straddled his lap, feeling his already hard cock between the fabric of your trousers. His hands moved down to your ass. Grabbing it the second he had a chance, and letting out a satisfied groan. You reached down to the hem of your top and pulled it off.
“You’re so fucking hot.”
He said with half lidded eyes as he watched your bare skin. You smirked at his comment and reached for his shirt as well. He lifted his back off the sofa to help you get it off. Once it was off you started examining his tattoos. Tracing his arm with your finger all the way up to his shoulder. You stopped once you saw the little circular scar. Your entire body froze as you remembered his words from your last session. “My mother reached her gun and shot the man in the shoulder. But he shot her in the head.”. He looked at you confused for a second, before he looked at his shoulder where your eyes were glued. He understood what you were thinking.
“You killed your family.”
You said and looked back at him. He was already shaking his head.
“The man was you. You killed them.”
You tried to get up from his lap, suddenly scared of the killer you were straddling. But he held you down with a strong grip.
“Baby calm down, let me explain.”
You continued to struggle. Not listening to his words.
“Y/n!”
He suddenly screamed. Getting your attention. He sighed.
“I didn’t kill them.”
“I don’t fucking believe you.”
You started struggling again, now hitting his chest as well. He quickly flipped the two of you. Pushing you down onto the sofa with his own body weight. Holding your wrists harshly.
“So what if I killed them? It doesn’t take away from the fact that you still owe me this!”
He looked dangerous on top of you like that. A single tear fell down the side of your cheek. He was right yet again. He kissed you tenderly. It was a sharp contrast to the tone in his voice.
“You still owe me your body.”
He started kissing down your neck. Eagerly taking one of your boobs in his hand. His crotch grinded against you for a second before you heard him curse under his breath.
“I’ll have to taste you another time. I can’t fucking wait any longer to be inside you.”
He started working on your jeans. Ripping them off in a hasty speed together with your panties. He quickly loosened his belt and repeated the action on himself. His cock sprung free, but you weren’t able to look at it for more than a second before he lifted your legs over his shoulders and pushed into you. The two of you moaned in unison. He was big, but he took little to no time for you to adjust, as he started thrusting into you with brutal force.
“You’re so fucking tight.”
He moaned, stopping his motion to spit on your pussy. Using it as lubricant. He continued quickly after. Moans and heavy breathing filled your office as the two of you strived to reach your orgasms. He reached down and started rubbing your clit. Almost overstimulating you.
“I’ve waited for this for so long, baby. You feel better than I ever imagined.”
You felt a familiar knot building in your lower stomach. The rapid speed of his hands and the stretching of his cock making you come closer to release quicker than ever.
“I need to come inside you. I need to fill you up, baby.”
You nodded. Not knowing or caring what you said yes to. You were already on cloud nine and needed him to continue whatever he was doing.
“Say my name.”
You understood he was close, and you were too.
“Jungkook!”
You moaned as your orgasm washed over you. You legs clenched around him, and your hands found his arms. Digging your nails into his skin. He came the second he heard his name escape your mouth. He let you ride out your orgasm, before he fell on top of you. You felt his breath go back to normal as he nuzzled into your neck. The two of you laid there in serenity for a while. Just feeling each others heartbeats and listening to each others breathing.
He would do as you told him. He would go see someone. He would do whatever it took to have you like that again. He would never let you go. You owed him this after all.
Thank you for reading! Do you want to read more?
Masterlist
2K notes · View notes
trulyhblue · 3 months
Text
Armband
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Niamh Charles x Chelsea! Canadian! Reader
Warnings: fluff, cocky! Niamhy, suggestive.
Masterlist
__________________
You were quite new to the team, only joining the Blue’s side in July, but it felt like you had known Niamh for a lifetime.
You were Canadian, but you grew up in Manchester with your parents, playing in the City Academy before playing professionally for them until your move to London. Because of this, you knew Jessie and Ashleigh well. You grew up playing alongside Jessie at the National Camps, debuting for the Senior team in the same year. Winning the Olympics was a dream come true, especially with girls you have known since you were little.
Manchester City was a dream worth chasing. You were friends with Lauren Hemp, Ella Toone — before and during her move to United — and all the rest. When you found Chelsea interested in you, it was undeniably difficult to say no. While you had grown up in the North, the move down was something that ignited a certain thrill within you.
You met Niamh at your first training session. Jessie had been partnered with you for drills, and you were in the middle of introducing yourself to Guro when the brunette came barrelling in. Her flyaways were barren across her face, cheeks nipped red from the cold weather. Her hands stuffed in her pockets, she nearly tripped you to the ground at the speed at which she ran towards you. You had known her from previous matches against her, both for Canada and City, but something about being on the same team with her felt distinct. Sure, you had admired her beforehand, but it was different now.
“Jeez, Charles, give her some room, will you?” Guro scoffed, playfully pushing the girl back a bit. You watched as she nipped the inside of her cheek, looking at you so intently that you struggled to keep eye contact.
Niamh held out her hand, grabbing yours and shaking it. You could hear Jessie giggling from behind you. “My name’s Niamh.” She announced, continuing to shake your hand. “I’m Niamh.”
Her nervous state was apparent, and Guro was in a fit of laughter at the interaction she was watching.
“Hi, nice to meet you.” You replied, hoping your dismissal of her apprehension would cool the flames in both your cheeks. “I’m Y/N.”
“Nice to meet you.” She gulped, obviously baffled at what to say.
You couldn't help but smile, nodding. “Erm, yes, you too.”
“Fuck, let go of her hand, Charles, you're ‘gonna tear it off.” A voice called from behind. You turned to find the Australian Captain trampling over, slinging a welcoming arm over your shoulder. Her laid-back persona made it easier for introductions. Unlike Niamh, who was a worrying mess in front of you.
“Right, sorry.” The English woman muttered, tearing her hand away and shoving right back in her pocket. Her cheeks seared with an even deeper embarrassment, and you shook off the motion with a tight-lipped smile.
“You’re alright, really.” You smiled, hoping the reassurance consolidated the girl.
It must've, since Niamh gave you a wide smile back, shuffling by your side ever since.
All of the Chelsea girls were lovely. You had no problem fitting into the Grove there. After a few weeks of making scare appearances as a super sub, you became a regular starter for the Blues. Your presence on the field was noticeable, and fans reeled at how you brought more opportunities down the field and into the back of the net.
“Would you be able to give this to Niamh for me, please?” One fan said after a game, handing two matching friendship bracelets with your names on one of them each. Erin was beside you, signing off the posters, when she caught a glimpse of them. Without a second thought, she waved over Niamh, who wasted no time in sprinting towards you.
“Hello.” She spoke, trying hard to discreetly slip her arm around your waist. You leaned into her side, showing her the two bracelets.
“Look how cute.” You smiled, ignoring the way some fans had started recording. You slipped a hand into Niamh’s jacket pocket, holding out the present with your other hand.
Niamh picked up the one with your name on it, slipping it on her wrist and displaying it to the little girl who had made it. “Very cute. I wish we could wear them during games.”
Subconsciously, you put yours (Niamh’s) one on too. The two of you were pretty much hugging at this point. The wind had sent chills through you, your kit doing little to warm you up.
The two of you took a photo with the fan before calling it a day and trudging off back to the changing rooms. You shivered as the wind picked up, holding your arms over your chest tightly as you tried to fight the cold.
Without much thought, Niamh shrugged off her jacket, hauling it around your figure and zipping it up for you.
When you got back to your apartment, engulfing the comfort of your bed after a hard-fought game, you opened up your phone to find hundreds of people tagging your account. You managed to click on the video, smiling to yourself at the sight of you and Niamh huddled together, talking to the little girl with bracelets adorned on your wrists. You clicked on another image, this time a photo, of you blanketed in Niamh’s jumper, your arm wrapped around her waist with one of her’s around your shoulder. The photo was everywhere on social media, including the Chelsea Account. 
After a couple more months, you ended up extending your contract until the end of 2027 by Christmas. You loved it there. Your friendship with the team had grown all the more closer. You felt a sense of home and solidarity that you had never felt before.
Your relationship with the team was selfless. Jessie and you had never been closer. Sam and Millie had taken you under their wing, calling you the baby of the group, since you were the shortest between you, them, Guro, Niamh, Erin, and Jessie. Fans had taken a ripe liking to you all over social media. But not just you by yourself, but with a certain brunette in your wake.
You and Niamh had grown very close over the time you spent in London. She wasn't as shy as she made herself out to be when you first met. She was cunning, confident, funny, and easy to be around in any environment. All of your teammates teased the living daylights out of the two of you, especially Niamh, who didn't waste a second in making sure you were always okay.
She would check on you when you went quiet. She always ran to you for partner work during drills, after goals, and when the full-time whistle would blow. The two of you had a habit of huddling together in any setting, holding each other’s hands or waist, cuddling their side or touching you in some way.
Everything you did with each other was full of love and adoration. It was only you two that didn't see your friendship blossom into a relationship. You weren't daft, you knew the speculations surrounding what the two of you were. There was no denying the physical acclimation you had around each other. Hell, Sam sent at least two memes a day about how whenever you were seen together, you were always touching each other.
Over Christmas, Niamh asked you out. She was a nervous wreck, which reminded you all too well of when you first met her. It was after a game, in the changing rooms. She had been given a bouquet of flowers by a group of fans, who told her to ask you out with them. She was reluctant, not only because she didn't want you to feel uncomfortable or pressured by the media to say yes, but the mere fact of ruining the relationship you already had with each other made her hesitant enough.
Of course, you said yes. It was a no-brainer, and after a few more dates you were officially together. It wasn't any more public than before. Only your close friends knew, but the public was already quite content with the PDA you already showed each other before you were dating. The only thing they needed was confirmation, but Niamh and you were happy to keep in vague.
After you said yes, the two of you became inseparable, both on and off the pitch. Niamh ended up extending her contract as well, and the chemistry you built made for an unstoppable case on the field. By the time the season came back after the break, you had moved in together. The happiness both of you felt was indescribable.
Today, Chelsea was up against Manchester United, your old rival team. Ella Toone was one of your childhood friends and was who you were marking. Not only was ManU a competitive, difficult team, but it was a team you were familiar with. They were always pushing in the midfield and up against the forwards. Their chances during set pieces were worrying to any defensive back line. With the combination of Mary Earps and a sophisticated midfield variation, you knew that you were in for a ride.
When Sam did her ACL, people started to underestimate Chelsea’s shot at winning the league. Everyone was starting to wonder whether the Blues were even contestable for the semis. After a poor attempt last week against West Ham for the FA Cup, you were adamant about proving yourself to the people who were doubting your ability to win. You were a midfielder, and while you had masterclasses in the centre field, your stats didn't excel in goals. You had many assists, but never many goals.
You were tying your laces when you felt your girlfriend's arms curl around your waist. You were leaning against your cubby, back facing Niamh. You were slightly bent as your finished the knot in your shoe, feeling the women behind you grasp your hips with a slight squeeze.
“You ready to smash it today, baby?” She muttered, her lips shadowing your ear, sending shivers down your body. You held composure well enough, straightening up and letting her wrap her arms over your abdomen.
“Mh, bit nervous, but yeah.” You replied, relishing Niamh’s pattern of breath. “How ‘bout you?”
Niamh pulled your body to face in front of her, your back now flushed against the wall. You managed to make eye contact with her dilated pupils, feeling one of her hands make their to the back of your neck.
Before she spoke, your eyes filtered down to the fabric that wrapped around her arm, the word ‘Captain’ sprawled across the armband. Niamh watched the way your eyes widened, and how you bit your bottom lip at the sight. Niamh smirked in response, pressing her front into yours so that most of your body was hidden to the rest of the room.
“What's the matter, baby?” She gloated, rubbing a hand up your side. Your cheeks flushed when she refused to break eye contact, holding tranquillity at the sight of your girlfriend as captain. It was a sight you weren't used to, but it was something you couldn't get enough of.
“Nothing. I'm— we should go line up in the tunnel.” Your breath hitched. Niamh was staring down at you while groping your waist.
Neither of you said anything until you were out on the field. You could hear the crowd cheering in anticipation. You shook your opponents’ hands aimlessly, your mind sauntering on the previous sight of your girlfriend.
“Earth to Y/N, hello?” Jessie’s voice snapped you out of your trance. She must've watched you wander to your position in a haze, since she was smirking knowingly at your flushed cheeks. Erin came up behind the two of you, laughing when she caught a glimpse of your state.
“She looks like she's already played the ninety minutes.” The Scottish woman quipped, bringing her hands up to play with your cheeks. You pushed her off playfully, gushing at the ground. “Shut up, you two.”
“God, if this is your reaction to Niamh in an armband, I wonder what Niamh would do if she saw you.”
“Go away, you pricks.” You snapped, flanking them away with your hands, trying to cool your cheeks before the game.
After the team photo, you ran back to your position, jumping up and down as the whistle blew.
The game was inevitably tough, but something had ignited inside of you at the sight of your girlfriend. As embarrassing as it was to admit, you were running up and down the pitch with the one endeavour to make your girlfriend watch you.
Chelsea was controlling the game for the most part, and it didn't take long for Guro to find you inside the box.
The crowd erupted in cheers, your teammates sprinting over to where you stood starstruck. This was one of the scarce amount of goals you had scored that season.
As you were making your way back to the middle, you felt a familiar figure creep up behind you with her hands soothing the tension in your shoulders.
“Making me so proud today, aren't you, baby?” Niamh whispered, running back to her spot in defence before you could reply.
The first half ended as quickly as it started. United had sent a flyer into the back of the net just before the whistle blew. You avoided Niamh like the plague in the changing rooms, knowing you would cave to her touch as soon as she laid hands on you. In any other circumstance, it was you who would tease, but it always ended with Niamh taking over. The two of you were strict in keeping your private life and career separate, but no one seemed to mind your change of game when Niamh was Captain.
You were having an absolute masterclass of a game by the sixtieth minute, scoring your second goal on seven minutes in. Chelsea was now up two-one, and Man U were starting to bring on subs after a close set piece that almost led to a goal.
You made a break down the wing after Lauren sent a cross-over to the field. You sprinted down the line, trying to find a way into the middle. United were tight in keeping you out, and by the time you had made it down the line, attempting to pass it to one of your teammates, you felt a pair of boots collide with your own, sending you face-first fo the floor.
The ball was long forgotten by the ref, who blew the whistle immediately, medics were sent over. While your muscles started to strain at the energy of the game, you didn't feel instantaneous pain from the fall.
You were rolling onto your back, wincing as you got up, when you first heard your girlfriend’s voice boom over the hustle of the crowd.
“Are you alright there, Zelem?!” She scoffed. You watched a smug Katie Zelem trampling off from where you sat. She didn't look like she meant the tackle, but the heat of the game left her feeling less apologetic than usual.
“Oh, let it go, Charles.” Zelem clapped back, walking towards Ella and Millie, who were tense at the sight of Niamh’s uncommon anger. “She's fine.”
“I don't think you understand.” Niamh marched towards her, grabbing the girl’s jersey, and forcing Katie to face her. “You get the fuck off her and the rest of my players. Don't be salty cause we’re winning.”
Katie rolled her eyes at that. “Don't be salty cause your girlfriend can't handle a tackle.”
Erin and Jessie were surrounding Niamh moments later, dragging her away from the United mob and towards you.
The medics have already cleared you to keep playing, and you were already up and ready to go by the time your girlfriends grabbed your hand.
“Are you sure you're okay?” She asked, taking in your flustered appearance. What she didn't know was that you were overwhelmed at the way Niamh looked just then, not by the absolute mouthful of grass you just inhaled.
You could only muster a nod, squeezing your girlfriend’s hand once before slipping away from her touch. You were now hungry for not only Niamh but that third goal. You wanted to prove yourself to everyone that you could do it.
And so you did.
It was a Chelsea corner, and you made the run from outside the box near the open post, where no one had thought to mark. You jumped as high as you could, feeling the ball hit your head in the right direction. You fell to the ground before you knew where the ball was going, letting the movement and relief of the crowd pull you to your feet. You ran to the corner of the field, taking in the shouts and cheers of the crowd and letting your teammates engulf you from behind. The weight of everyone sent you down as more and more girls piled on top of you.
This was your first hat trick ever at Chelsea, and you were relishing the feeling of the euphoria for the rest of the game.
When the final whistle blew, you nearly collapsed from exhaustion. Everything you wanted to go right in the game went right. You were reeling at the win, looking across the field for a particular someone.
“Guess I know what to do to make you score some goals.” Niamh chuckled, grabbing your waist and lifting you into a spinning hug. You gripped onto her and giggled, letting her twirl you around.
“Thanks, Niamhy.” You smiled, gazing up at your girlfriend’s proud eyes. “You looked so good today, baby.”
“You think so?” She asked, though both of you knew she was just egging you on.
“Mhm. Looked so good.”
“You always look good, my stargirl.” The taller girl grinned, looking down at you slyly. Her lips met your ear, her voice sending chills down your spine. “But I guess I’ll need to reward you for doing so well. Show you how good you were for me.”
You didn't get to respond, feeling Jessie pull you away with the Player of the Match trophy shoved into your chest.
You knew you’d see her soon… you were looking forward to it.
niamhcharles
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niamhcharles — she scores more when I am Captain.
Tagged: Yourusername
Comments:
samanthakerr — yeah the girls 🙌🏼
*liked by yourusername, niamhcharles
User8 — they will never beat the dating allegations
^ user10 — at this point they are embracing it
guroreiten — she always score goals, Charles 🙄
^ niamhcharles — READ THE CAPTION
^ guroreiten — I DID
^ niamhcharles — i said she scores “more” goals
^ guroreiten — oh, okay.
^ user1 — LMAO
yourusername — always complimenting me 😍
^ erincuthburt — too much apparently… as if she didn't do it enough in the Change Rooms
^ niamhcharles — i did it more when we got home
^ erincuthburt — youre blocked.
User22 — they are so pookie together
^ user76 — omg yes
jflem_ — that armband ignited something within her
^ yourusername — EXCUSE ME?????
^ user2 — LMAO JESSIE
^ user3 — don't expose her like that 💀
^ yourusername — Ikr 😖
erincuthburt — Niamh needs to be in that armband more often 😂
^ yourusername — maybe I just had a good game?!?!
^ erincuthburt — we all have our superstitions
^ user6 — LMAO ERIN IM CRYING
User78 — If you look closely I’m jumping off the bridge
^ user90 — mood.
User67 — okay but when Niamh protected Y/N at the Man U game!? 😋😋😋 wishing I was Y/N right now.
laurenhemp — where were those hat tricks at City, Y/N???
^ yourusername — you stole them all
yourusername — can a girl just score a hat-trick because shes good? 😖😖😖
^ niamhcharles — you did it all by yourself 🫶🏼
^ yoursusername — thx niamhy 🥰
^ guroreiten — suck up
^ samanthakerr — suck up
^ milliebright — suck up
^ niamhcharles — a proud suck up x
^ jflem_ — 🤢
^ niamhcharles — ok bye.
user7 — THIS IS SO CUTE BYE
_________________________
517 notes · View notes
wosoamazing · 2 months
Text
The Three Letters
Summary: Sam tears her ACL during a game against WestHam, you get upset, Millie helps you understand, the team supports you and your Mum’s
Warnings: ACLs
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You were sitting on the bench next to Millie, wearing your jersey, you were an avid Blues supporter which isn’t surprising considering you had grown up at Chelsea, your Mum was in talks with Chelsea when she found out she was pregnant with you, she was worried that Emma may no longer want her, so when she told Emma about her situation she was pleasantly surprised when Emma said to her that they would sign a contract early, especially considering the Red stars were dropping her due to her pregnancy and that she was talking to other clubs. Emma was very supportive, through the pregnancy and after, she worked with your Mum and helped her get back to playing surprising quickly after you were born, she arranged sitters for you, she even sometimes look after you herself. Sam was very grateful to have found Chelsea, they accepted her from day one and they were her family. You loved Chelsea too especially Millie, Erin and Guro.
Sam was a little surprised when she found out she was pregnant, as 3 months prior she had decided to stopped IVF her fifth round had failed, or that is what the doctors had said, but her national teammates were adamant the doctors were wrong, she kept vomiting and had weird cravings so one camp she ended up doing a test and found out.
Today you felt slightly odd wearing your blue jersey, you didn’t want to upset your Mama, it was also the first time your Mum and Mama were playing against each other, you had just recently moved from your old apartment to your new one, as now you lived with both your Mum and your Mama. You had known Mama for most of your life, but you had never lived with her, and your Mum had never versed her in a Chelsea game, it was only ever in a Matilda’s game. So, you didn’t exactly know which team to cheer for, but you decided to stay true to your roots and support Chelsea. Blue was also a better colour than brown or claret as your Mama always corrected you, your Mum would laugh every time she did so.
It was the 80th minute and with the knowledge there would be a lot of stoppage time Emma had come over to the subs bench to talk, she stood with her back to the pitch just beside you, everyone on the bench wasn’t paying attention to the field but instead to Emma, Millie had told you to be quiet for the new few minutes, but as always if there was an emergency you could interrupt, you didn’t know if your Mum lying on the grass holding onto her knee was an emergency or not but you decided to interrupt anyway so you got on your knees to be closer to Millie’s ear and softly spoke to Millie “sgoose me Millie,” she turned her head from Emma to you so you continued “why Mummy on floor?” she whipped her head to where your little arm was pointing too before saying “Shit, Emma you might want to see this,” Emma quickly turned around and as she did the ref blew the whistle, the medics were quickly running onto the pitch towards your Mummy and your Mama had made her way beside her, bent down next to her squeezing her hand, she was saying something to her but you were obviously to far away to hear.
“Fuck” Emma yelled causing you to get frightened, you jumped into Millie’s lap and a small tear rolled down your cheek before Millie hugged you saying, “It’s alright,” Emma must’ve seen your actions out of the corner of her eye because as quick as she was to turn around she sat down in your now empty seat.
“Sorry, y/n/n, I shouldn’t have done that, I’m just a bit stressed currently” she said softly as she rubbed your arm, you nodded before leaning back on Millie who placed her head ontop of yours, “it can’t be happening”.
“It might not be, she isn’t crying,” Millie replied optimistic.
“Mummy never cries, what Mama says” you replied, both women sighed, what you said what exactly true, your vision began to blur slightly as tears welled up in your eyes, you could sense something was wrong, you saw the stretcher being brought on and a few tears fell from your eyes, they landed on Millie’s arms which were wrapped around you, she squeezed you slightly tighter at the sensation and turned her head to Emma “Do you need me? I know you said you might want me to go on but like do you need me?”
“No no. Go. Take her. This has to be overwhelming for her, maybe head down to the medical room so you’re there for when Sam gets down there. Her and Sam matter more than the game,” Emma replied whole heartedly.
“Thank you, Emma, I’ll keep you updated” Millie replied before getting up, she gathers your things and headed down to the medical room. Your Mum was brought in shortly after, already having had scans, the doctors updated Millie and told her was going on, the three of you sat in the room in silence, Sam quickly falling asleep, Millie knew there would be a lot going through her head and so just let her be.
The door opened gently, and your Mama walked in, she kissed your forehead before she spoke, “Hey, baby girl, how is Mummy?” she ruffled your hair.
“Hurt”, you reply.
“ACL” Millie said informing your Mama better, your Mama’s face broke at the three letters and she turned to your Mum who had just woken up from her brief nap, her face relaxed slightly at the sight of her fiancé, they hugged as a silence filled the air, which was soon broken by your Mum, “Kris-” her voice broke as Mama interrupted her “Hey, it’s okay, I’m here now, I’ve got you, we’ll get through this together, I promise, I love you” your Mama said as your Mum broke down in tears, you started crying too, you didn’t know what was going on, your Mum was upset, your Mama seemed upset, Emma was stressed. Your cries made Sam cry even more, “I’ll just take her out for a second, I’ll calm her down and try to explain to her what’s happened” Millie told both of your Mum’s, who nodded gratefully, before she got up, holding you in her arms and walked out, she opted not to stop in the locker room and instead she walked out into the hallway and found a more quite spot, before she slid down the walk and sat on the ground, she positioned you so that you were sitting in her lap facing her, you just leaned into her and sobbed into her chest, she rubbed your back as she tried to sooth you, after a while you leant back at looked at her, “Millie,” “yeah?” she replied softly, “What’s wrong with Mummy?”
“Well, your Mummy’s hurt her knee,” “Oh, will she get better” “Yeah, she will” “Is it bad?” Millie nodded, before she pulled out her phone, she quickly did something on it before showing you a photo “See this. This is a knee, and this is a ligament”, the ligament was highlighted purple in the picture, “a ligament is sort of like a very strong rubber band, and this ligament is very important, it kind of holds your knee together, its an ACL, and your Mummy has hurt her ACL, and she will need surgery to fix it, and she will have to work very hard to get better, she will get better though, it will just take a long time. Does that make sense” you nodded in response still absorbing all of the information.
“You’re oddly good at that Mils maybe you should become a teacher when you retire” a voice from above said, the voice held an amused but kind tone. Millie looked up to see Magda and Pernille stand in front of her. “We thought to just come and check that you and Y/N were okay,” Magda said as they both sat down either side of Millie. You smiled at both of them, and they smiled back. “We’ve had showers and everything, if you want, we can take Y/N so you can have a shower and stuff” Pernille offered.
“Thanks guys, that would be great.” She said to them before looking to you “Hey, I’m just going to have a shower quickly, but I’ll come back and then if you want, we can go see Mummy” she soft said to you. “Okay,” you replied before standing up and moving over to Pernille, you quickly found a place in her lap, and smiled at her again. Millie got up and went into the locker room, Magda shuffled closer to you and Pernille. “How are you feeling Y/N?” Magda asks, “Sad, and and I don’t know, why did Mummy have to get hurt?” you replied, for your age you were quite good at expressing your emotions and thoughts, it was something Sam had taught you, first with little amounts of sign then with words, it was important to her that you were able to do so due to her job and the fact that you would be around people often who didn’t know you inside out like she did.
Both women sighed before Pernille replied “I know, it’s unfair, isn’t it, and it’s also okay to not know how you feel, sometimes emotions are confusing, and sometimes they get to much but that is okay.” You just hummed and nodded in reply, Pernille’s words were oddly comforting. Magda whispered something in Pernille’s ear before she got up and went back into the locker room, she returned shortly later, with your water bottle, and blanket in hand, she sat back down handed you your water bottle, you took some big sips before handing it back to her, she then laid your blanket over you and within seconds you were asleep.
You had been woken up due to some movement and look up to find you were now in Millie’s arms, “Do you want to see Mummy now?” you nodded sleepily, Millie took you through the locker room and into the medical room, where your Mummy was.
“Hey, baby girl, I missed you.” Your Mummy told you; you could hear the sadness in her voice.
“Do you want her? She has been sleeping, probably will go back to sleep” Millie said to Sam, who nodded, so she carefully put you in Sam’s lap, your little legs were either side of her body, and you quickly snuggled into the familiar comfort of your Mum. “I love you Mummy, I will help you get better,” “Thank you baby, I love you lots, never forget that” she replied as she placed a kissed-on top of your head. The room was silent, as your Mummy just sat there, you in her lap and Millie in the chair adjacent.
You were half asleep when you heard your Mum mumble “I’m sorry” to Millie. “For what?” you felt her shrug, and a tear rolled down her cheek.
“Sammy, we’ve got you I promise, everyone was so concerned about you and already asking how they should help, I’m pretty sure little miss is going to get lots of sleepover invites but I did remind them that you love her and so maybe offering to take her away and possibly leaving you on your own wasn’t the best idea.” You felt your Mum’s chest vibrate as she laughed at what Millie had just said before Millie continued “I’ll be here every step of the way, if you need anything, anything at all I will come over and help, even if it’s just a square of chocolate, but in all seriousness we will all help you, with anything, I will literally be a text or call away.”
____
They next week was tough, for all three of you, you got sick, Sam had just had her surgery and Kristie was looking after both of you whilst also still training and playing at West Ham, however to ease the load Steph came over to visit, Dean had gone away and she was lonely or at least that’s what she said so that your Mum’s didn’t feel worse than they already did about her staying over and helping.
About 2 months into your Mum’s injury you went away on a Team Trip with the team but it was Emma and Millie who took you, they promised Sam that they would take extra special care of you in which they did, you had an absolutely fantastic time, you got lots of treats, got to stay up late, helped Emma with training, and even got to walk out with Emma as coach, during the line ups at one stage. The Matilda’s Olympic Qualifier Squad was being announced and so Sam was having a hard time emotionally with her injury, so Millie and Emma decided that they would take you with them.
______
After a long 9 months you Mum made her return, it was a home game and the fans went wild, you were just happy that your Mum was happy again.
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woso-dreamzzz · 4 months
Text
Bayern Munich
Hardersson x Child!Reader
Part of The Big Adventures Universe
Summary: Your first day at Bayern Munich
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The low rumble of German is soothing in your ears as Momma and Morsa walk into the Bayern Munich training centre.
You still remember all of your German and more because when you moved to England, Momma made sure to get you a German tutor because she was adamant that you would end up back here at some point.
Momma kept a lot of her German too so it's only Morsa that's going to struggle.
Bayern Munich isn't Wolfsburg but it's not Not-Wolfsburg either so you can live with this. It helps that the jersey has red on it like Arsenal does so you like it even more.
You've got your favourite training bag on your back but you know it won't really be used much today.
Some more official looking people greet you all, shaking your Momma and Morsa's hands in greeting and smiling politely at you.
"The rest of the girls are in the gym," One of the official people says," There's cubbies already waiting and labelled for you all in the locker room."
"Thank you," Momma says, taking your hand and walking you all there.
What the man said was true. Momma and Morsa have their own cubbies where their training shirts are already hanging up.
But you've got one too, complete with a tiny little training shirt for you and a new pair of goalkeeper gloves waiting.
You gasp and scurry forward.
"Morsa! Momma! Look, gloves!"
"We can see that," Morsa says as she begins to change," They must have seen how much you love keeping."
"I love keeping," You confirm as Momma helps you change into your new Bayern shirt.
"We know. Come on, princesse. Let's go meet everybody."
Momma and Morsa have been here before without you so they already kind of know their way around. It doesn't take a long time to get there.
You feel a little bit shy as you go in so hide a bit behind Morsa's long legs. Momma and Morsa greet everybody and you stay where you are, your hand holding tight on Morsa's waistband.
"Princesse," Morsa says," Say hello."
"Hallo."
One of the girls - the one with number sixteen on her shirt - laughs. "She speaks German?"
You nod. "Ja."
She laughs in delight and turns to look at Georgia Stanway, who you recognise from the World Cup and vaguely from when she played for Manchester City. "The kid speaks better German than you!"
Georgia rolls her eyes. "Life's too short to learn German." She approaches you with a smile, holding her hand out for a high five. "It's nice to see you again. You look good in a Bayern shirt."
"I like red," You reply with a little smile.
"I know. I heard from Leah that you really like Arsenal too."
"You know Leah?"
"Of course I do! Me and Leah go way back."
"Leah's really cool!"
Georgia laughs and leans forward like she's going to tell you a secret. "I'm cooler."
"Really?"
"So much cooler! Everything at Bayern's cooler! We've got the cooler Sam Kerr too!"
Your crinkle appears between your brows. "But Sam's in England."
"That's the Australian Sam," A new girl says as she approaches," I'm the Scottish Sam Kerr."
"Scottish," You repeat," Like Erin? And Jen? And Kim?"
"Exactly like them," Scottish Sam says.
You nod. "That's cool."
"See?" Georgia says," Everything's cooler here."
"You don't need to get her on your side," Morsa says a bit petulantly," She'd already decided that Bayern ranked above Chelsea the moment she saw the red on the jersey."
You nod. "Bayern is better than Not-Wolfsburg."
Morsa groans and Momma shakes her head fondly at you.
Georgia grins at you. "I think we're going to enjoy having you here."
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lovinpelova · 5 months
Text
prove them wrong | j. fleming
summary; the chelsea girls believe jessie is too innocent to fuck you, she proves them wrong. [SMUT]
🎵 private landing - don toliver
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jessie had always acted differently around you. around others she was quiet, shy and reserved with a blush adorning her cheeks out of embarassment alongside a soft tone of voice you could listen to all day. she made sure to keep herself toned down even around her best friends. when it was just the two of you she grew confident, louder even, and although she still reserved a quiet side for you sometimes she was mainly a completely different person.
that's what led you right here, your arm around the canadians shoulders as she pushed her body further into yours whilst you watched your teammates dancing drunkenly and sat with some others. you were in a comfortable silence whilst listening to the conversation, jessies hand finding yours as she smiled up at you and you kissed her forehead in response, content in your own little bubble until guro popped it with her tipsy rambling.
"speaking of people who don't have the confidence to do things, what do you reckon jessie doesn't have the confidence to do when it involves y/n?"
sam sat with her in silence for a moment, erin also joining in on the thinking as you and jessie readjusted yourselves to listen properly, interested in where drunk guro would be taking this next.
"definitely doesn't tell her when she's mad at her."
"no, she definitely does everything y/n tells her to."
jessie blushed at the comments as you snickered, knowing only half of them were true whilst sam and guro bickered back and forth with erin joining in to share the occasional opinion, her eyes suddenly lighting up to break apart the two sad beside her.
"i got it!"
sam and guro stopped arguing, the drunk norwegian taking another sip of her rum and coke as you all listened to what the scot had to say.
"you can't tell me sweet little jess has the confidence to top someone!"
"holy shit you're so right! she's way too shy."
the three of them agreed in laughter as you joined in, chuckling and refusing to confirm or deny it whilst they continued bickering about how they strongly believed jessie was a pillow princess. the canadians hand found its way to your thigh, making you look at her and smile like usual, thinking she just wanted some form of physical contact to ground herself from the embarassment- only to find her eyes blown out and staring back at you lustfully.
the midfielder made sure the others didn't see, turning towards them with a blush on her face and sinking back into her chair with the occasional argument when she was called 'too precious' to even think about having sex. as much as jessie loved the girls and the way they spoke about her timid nature it could get annoying sometimes, they thought just because she was quiet that she wasn't a grown woman with needs and her own experiences. when they first found out you were dating they were shocked, understandably, but they were even more shocked when they learned jessie wasn't a virgin.
i mean, she's a twenty-five year old grown woman, why do they act like she's never had sex before?
the thoughts made jessies hand tighten on your thigh quickly, feeling herself grow more furious by the second at the constant misinterpretation from her teammates (and sometimes public eye) before she excused herself and headed towards the toilet without an explanation. the four of you looked up in shock at the sudden movement she used to back away, your instincts immediately figuring out she wanted you to follow her as you excused yourself to check on her.
as soon as you opened the door an inch and peeked your head in to check if she'd actually gone to the toilet a rough grip tugged your wrist and pushed you against the sink, not bothering to wait for the door to close as you felt your lover push her lips onto yours in a needy manner. it took you a second to kiss back due to the unexpected action but you eventually gathered your thoughts, feeling jessies hands move to your waist as she picked you up and placed you on the counter before standing between your legs.
as soon as you started wondering why jessie wanted to do this here and now it clicked like the final puzzle piece. you had no doubt in your mind she was going to fuck you until the girls heard you moaning her name out- not the other way around. she wanted to prove their assumptions wrong without having to argue, she was going to give them an undeniable piece of evidence and shut them up.
before you had a chance to even think about slowing jessie down her hand slipped into your underwear as she bit down on your lip roughly, slowly sinking her digits into you with a smirk at the needy moan you let out. your fingers found purchase in her hair with a tug, relishing in the groan that fell from her lips for a moment before she started moving her fingers at a rapid pace.
"jess what if they hear?"
you whispered against her ear breathily as your hips grinded in time to her thrusts, the canadian grunting in response whilst leaving sloppy kisses along your neck and curling her fingers. she was eager to get you to your high and she wanted it now.
"get louder."
she demanded gruffly, one hand holding onto your hips to keep you still before she started abusing your g-spot, not even needing to search for it because she remembered everything about you so well.
"but-"
"i said, get. louder."
she emphasised, watching you nod in response to her sudden rough aura before you started to really focus on how good she was fucking you. not long ago she was curled up into your side and in awe of the way your fingers looked laced together- now she was demanding you moan out her name with her fingers pistoning in and out of your pussy at a god-like pace.
"feels so good jess, keep going. 'm almost there."
"gonna scream my name like i want you to? gonna be a good girl and let everyone know who makes you feel this good?"
"yes, jessie! yes- fuck baby! keep going jess!"
she hummed in content at your response, continuing to push against your g-spot until your fingers tugged at her hair one final time as you let out a guttural moan the girls outside definitely heard, your release spilling all over her digits with your thighs shaking around her waist. she held them open with her hips whilst slowing down her thrusts and eventually pulling her fingers up towards your mouth, watching with dark eyes as you sucked them clean without her even having to ask.
"good girl."
she mumbled, leaning in to kiss you softly and continue doing so until you'd fully recovered from your orgasm. the canadian helped you down and out of the bathroom after you both fixed your appearances, a smug smirk on her face whilst your cheeks grew bright red at the amount of eyes you now had watching you.
"have fun in there you two?"
erin asked sarcastically, the girls who heard bursting out into laughter as jessie wrapped an arm around your shoulders and pulled you closer to kiss your forehead. the team were never gonna let you live this down.
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tojisun · 3 months
Text
WIP: still your passenger (re: deftones)
simon ghost riley x gn reader
!! angst; canon-compliant // i rlly loved this one but writers block hit me bad every time i try completing it :< might pick it up one day (hopefully!!)
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there’s a new medic in the base – a pretty girl with a pretty smile, pretty eyes, pretty laugh. she’s beautiful, perfect with her auburn hair and her chestnut eyes; striking with her trimmed waist and sloping curves. 
you’ve only met her once when you needed an aspirin for your fever and never more after that, after all, there’s really not much of a reason for a base assistant like you to visit the station. so all that you’ve heard about her came from privates and base operators, greedy in the way they took in the sight she makes and how darling she looks. you can’t really blame them, not after seeing her; seeing how she is a beam of something soft and tender amidst their chaotic group.
it had been soap who started giving you the specifics.
her name’s erin, a lass hailing from yorkshire. the only family she’s got is a younger sister, anna, who is in university for astrophysics. 
“they’re a family of smart nuts,” johnny mused as he spun his shot of whiskey. “can you believe it? she’s pretty and wise.”
you oohed and aahed before telling him to remember to keep it in his pants because erin, beautiful and darling and gentle erin, is an important member of the squad. that she is necessary in the base; having been sought out for the very reasons that got johnny acting like a fool.
“of course i’ll keep it in!” johnny whined, bumping his head on the counter. “i don’t want to anger LT, y’know?”
cold dread washed over you upon hearing what he said, the quiet thrum of the alcohol being chased away by the slice of his words. you felt like bleeding, like you’ve been cut open and doused with ice, blistering chill creeping up from the softness of your lungs to your stuttering heart. 
“oh?” you remember asking, your voice startlingly void of emotions. “why would he be angry now?” your hands trembled and so you hid them from view, clenching them on your lap instead. 
johnny turned to you and quirked up a secretive smile. “why else?”
the weight of your grief pressed onto your chest, threatening to crack the columns of your ribs. you felt afloat, untethered, and you blinked back the sudden prickling you feel in the back of your eyes. 
you laughed with johnny, trying to smother the ache. trying not to drown in the harsh pools of your heartbreak.
because of course.
of course. 
you and simon are friends, but nothing more. nothing beyond the hushed voices and whispered ‘i’m glad you’re safe’ pressed onto each other’s cheeks because neither of you made things official anyway. no risks were taken, no promises to break. 
everything with him was just physical – chasing the cold nights away with the warmth of each other’s bodies pressed onto each other, fighting nightmares with each other's touches. 
sure simon cradled you in his tender embrace but that was all. just a temporary passion despite your everlasting yearning. 
“y’ready to go back to the base?” johnny asked and you said yes, another lie that dribbled from your trembling lips. because after that night, you knew that things were never going to be the same.
—————
ignoring simon was easy. it’s not like you needed to do much to avoid him, anyway, not with the way he was gravitating around erin. any other day it would have been laughable how simon followed her around like she’s got a bear of a man for her shadow but, well. seeing him be so taken by her makes you ache. 
the sparse moments he has that were sometimes spent with you were now overwritten by his visits to the facility where erin usually is. everyone who didn’t know that ghost was smitten over the new medic certainly knew now; he had long stopped making it a secret and instead, began to posture over those who tried pursuing erin. 
he was never a jealous man. that was until her, you guess.
and it’s not like you can fault erin for how simon acts, because could you blame him? could you blame anyone for that matter?
erin was, is, beautiful. she had a laugh that sounded like wind chimes and had a sparkle that perpetually made her eyes look brighter. she was soft even after seeing everyone’s troubles or their anger, always a beacon of tenderness amidst their bleeding wounds. but she was also fierce, a fighter with a bite that no one expected, but maybe you all should have because no one would ever survive being out in combat if one isn’t strong, anyway.
erin was, well, she was someone you knew simon needed in his life.
so, again, could you really blame him?
you have always known simon. you have always understood past his pretences – he wanted to settle. he wanted a life beyond the fight; wanted a family to come home to. 
he’s told you this so many times, hasn't he? murmured his wishes and desires at the top of your head as he cradled you in his arms, letting the exhaustion of the day bleed away from your pores as you shared a breath with him; he had waxed poetries for a distant future, one you have always thought you would have been a part of. 
one you thought you would have shared with him.
but you knew. despite your self-reassurances that you meant something to simon, you knew that when he envisioned his life, his future, it was one that did not include you.
it hurts, you thought to yourself as you pressed the back of your palms over your eyes. it hurts.
but how could it? how could you hurt over losing something that you never even had in the first place?
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heartfullofleeches · 11 months
Text
Good Boy
Male Sub Yan Bully + G.N Reader
"I only need a good boy by my side, and I don't mean someone who'll have me home by eight. I want an obedient pet. Will you be that for me?."
Warnings/Tags: Top/Dom Reader, Anal Sex/Pegging, Cross-dressing, Light Degradation and pet play. Reader's gender is (obviously) never stated, but their parts are referred to as dick for ease.
Anyone with working eyes could see how whipped that boy was for you.
From the day he pushed past you in the hall, a faint spark started his heart stemming from the dismissive glare you back shot his way. That flicker was the match that blew everything into an explosive mess for your attention, igniting any obstacle in its wake. Your fellow peers avoided you for the continued safety of their fingers and social life, and every which way you turned he was there. His physical harassment didn't go beyond shoving you out of his way or snatching pencils and things meant for trash.
You never acted out against him - to his. Never ratted him out or even raised your voice. You hardly talked to him at all and that pissed him even off more. To make matters worse you were cordial in your brief encounters, and even threw off-handed comments his way. Trailing your fingers up his bicep when he forced himself at your table. Saying he looked "nice" with his hair up and out of the way of those pretty eyes. It drove him mad. He knew you knew he was too chicken shit to actually put hands on you and didn't bother wasting your energy to provoke him.
Recently, your dynamic had taken yet another turn. One, uneventful Monday morning, you strolled right up to his locker and patted him on the head as you walked off to class. His knees turned to jelly, and he nearly had a locker door slammed in his face following your hand as it left his soft locks. At lunch that very same day, you sat in his lap and even fed him his food - so long as he rushed through that project for his next class he was intentionally planning to fail. When the grades were sent back and you caught wind of his score, you kissed him on the cheek and ruffled his hair like you did before. His goons spread rumors of the two of you dating, but now everyone believed it with the leash you had around his neck. If he didn't get himself into detention, another pat. Good grades? Two kisses - if he work school appropriate clothing. Your switch from pretending he never existed to dotting on him like you were actual lovers boggled his mind to no end. What made you see him differently?
"This thing is way too damn short. I told you I'm not putting on fucking her bra - that's gross. Where the hell is my phone.. What the fuck?... give it to me. Post that and I will fucking ki-"
Oh - that would explain thing. It would explain a lot actually. All those weeks back, Erin had been asked by a friend to help deliver his sister's clothing to a nearby shelter with a few beers as payment. One of them had the brilliant idea to have a drinking contest with the loser having to try on her clothes. When it was discovered he had been pouring his into the grass, Erin was immediately disqualified and given his dues. They took video and posted it to his private page - forgetting about the person he made follow back. In all honesty, Erin had no problem wearing feminine clothing. It was just that everything that girl had absolutely shit tastes in fashion and not at all to kiss liking.
What he had on now was exactly his style.
Sliding a hand up his outer thigh, you loop two fingers through the heart shaped buckle attached to his garters and thigh highs. The spaghetti straps of his crop top hand loose and torn off his shoulders; neck and chest decorated in dark bruises and teeth marks. Circling your tongue around his puffy nipple, you pull it between your teeth - just to watch him squirm as your lips break contact with his chest; the strip of leather hanging from his thigh crackling against his skin as you retch your fingers free. He whimpers mutely, rubbing the stinging flesh into the mattress to prolong that fading bite. Grabbing his knee causes him to stop immediately, looking up at you with those pretty, pleading eyes through the whispy, dark ginger locks clinging to his sweaty forehead and cheeks. You smirk.
"What a good boy."
It had all been a test. You saw that video, and you had to have him. You knew he could be obedient with the right motivations and there was none better than giving yourself - and a little praise, to him. As usual, Erin was pissed when he found out you were training him like some.. dog, but he couldn't deny the guilty pleasure of you turning him into your bitch in front of the whole school. His cock throbs in his panties as his hazy mind replayed the billionth loop of you calling him yours; the phantom heat of your breath against his ears sending chills. Erin bucks away from the hand placed over the bump in his skirt so you wouldn't notice the pulse, but you certainly had. You close your fingers around his length, stilling him as another gloop of drool rolls past his lips.
"Eager Boy! I would love to help you with this, but.... I only need a good boy by my side, and I don't mean someone who'll have me home by eight."
You drop your lips to his ear, teasing the shell in just the way that made him cry out everytime. His little bated moans were the cutest thing.
" I want an obedient pet - and lover. Will you be that for me, Erin."
His cock ached at the first title; his heart sung at the next. He'd do anything to relieve the tension in both areas. Anything to be yours. Licking his bitten lips, he nods.
"I'll be good...."
You reach up to stroke his cheek. Erin nips at your fingers, rolling the metal ball of his piercing between each. He spits directly in your hand.
"Freak."
His chest rises with a shaky laugh, yet there's nothing but obedience in those eyes. It's a work in progress. You smack the meat of his thigh with your spit covered hand; the sound and force of the saliva hitting his send immeasurable. The e way his mouth falls open as he gasps - you would've thought he came right then and there if his solid erection wasn't in your opposite hand.
"You're lucky I'm nice. Turn over, pretty boy."
Leaning back, you help Erin lift his leg over your head as he turns over onto his stomach. Scooting forward, his ass falls into your lap as he sinks down. You raise the skirt that barely covered much to begin with and slip those lace panties down; pre-ejaculate smeared into its crotch. You wish you hand more time to appreciate his attire or shove those frilly garments down his throat, but as soon as he came through your door it was too your bedroom - and you wanted to hear his sounds nice and clear for your first time together. There would be plenty more nights in the future for you to do whatever your heart desired. Reaching forward, you tap his lips with your finger.
"Spit? Since you've already proven you don't mind getting your drool all over your master."
Erin opens his mouth - letting out a gagged yelp of surprise as your fingers shoot down his throat. He's never been more thankful for the lack of a reflex. Regaining what little composure he hand, Erin swirls his tongue around your fingers and hollows his cheeks as he suckles them as you drag them out his mouth. His head falls into the pillow as you draw your arm back to position; spreading his asscheeks as your lubricated thumb teases his hole. It slips in easier than you imagine and his back muscles go taught.
"Have you fingered yourself before?"
Erin buries his face in the pillow, eyes avoiding your stare. ".... toothbrush."
"Pfft - you whore. I was wondering what happened to that. Guess I don't have to ask who you were thinking about while you did it."
"At least you go your brains if anything ever happens to your face."
Frowning, you yank the hair still trapped in the scrunchie he wore. "Bad dog. Guess you won't need the prep then."
Removing your finger, you lend your cock to his hole. He hooks one arm under the pillow and reaches the other behind him. You take his hand and lock your fingers with his as you slip inside; pinning the limb to his back as you sink in. You pull your knees from under him and plant them in the mattress as you drag your girth out of his tight hole. Erin drops his free hand between his legs, but you quickly add your weight to his arm - immobilizing him.
"Ah-ah, I didn't say you could do that did I?"
Erin grumbles something under his breath, but thankfully you don't hear it. As a reward for staying still you kiss along his back up to the nape of his neck, right below his choker where you plant your teeth as you start off at a gradual pace. His skirt falls pack down a couple times which you lose care of after a while and let drap at your thighs. He keeps his lips separated from the pillow so his heavy breathes are audible - just like he knew you wanted. Such a good boy. Dropping your grasp to his waist, you tug him back with each thrust - virtually bouncing the drooling boy on your cock. His greedy hole and desperate whimpers suck you back in. Pleads he tempts to conceal with his moans ringing longer no matter how exaggerated his sounds become. Like everything when it came to you - he just couldn't keep it in.
"ngh...y/n...please...hah... give more."
"You want more this so soon? Hm, you've been good enough so far."
Yelping as your hips snap against the curve of his ass, Erin rocks his with a stutter - rutting his aching cock into the mattress chasing friction you refuse to provide. Your hand cracks hard against his right cheek and his back arches against your sweaty bare chest as he all but screams into the pillow now forced into snuffing his cries. You grab his jaw and his head pivots back to look up at you.
"So noisy.... It's unsightly of you, Erin. Like you're a different person now you've got a few inches in you. Tell me, are you my good little puppy or some bitch in heat using my dick to get off?"
Tongue petaled around your thumb, Erin cries out beneath its weight. "Mmph.." You lift your finger, smearing his drool into his cheek as you turn his head to face you.
"What was that, boy?"
"y-yours... 'm yours, I promise. I can be both. Please let me be both."
"We'll see about that." Standing on your knees, you yank Erin along with you and lock your arm around his neck to keep him from falling as you drill upwards into him. His cock bobs with each hammer of your hips into his and you have enough mercy to stroke him to completion as his eyes roll back in his head. You mouth more marks into his neck and shoulder blades, scrapping your teeth on the bone. Your name bleeds off his tongue like it's the only he's ever known and right now there couldn't be a truer statement. You suck one more fresh hickey to his neck and work on to his jaw, licking the stray tears that drip down to the corners of his mouth as you crush his windpipe in your hold - darting your tongue past his gasping lips. Erin groans in the blissful heat of the thirsty kiss, cumming into your hand and onto his thighs and your pillow. You rub the sensitive flesh for a few more strokes before letting him fall into his own mess. You join him on the unstained pillow and scoop your arm under his neck. He scoots over, resting his head on your chest - eyelids droopy and body slack. You brush his hair out of his face, pressing a kiss to his clammy temple.
"A quick rest, then it's the showers before bed for you, Mister.. You did amazing for me. Clean?"
You extend your hand; palm glazed with his spend. Erin scoffs, lips twitching into a faint smile.
"You're such a dick."
He sweeps his tongue over the salty fluid and licks it off the ball of your fingers, cringing at the taste, but doing as asked for once.
"True, but I'm your dick now."
He stops - eyes soft and more vulnerable than the entirety of your session. "You... were serious about that?"
"Of course. You're a good boy, Erin - when you want to be. I like you."
His head falls back to your chest, hand finding yours. "i... love you."
-
The next day at school, you walk in together with your wrist in his hand. You'd let him keep his big dog act for just a little longer. Stopping at your longer, Erin spots the one that got away - some little shit that snuck a note in your locker and fled his fury due to the teacher standing in the hall. His right hand tightens into a ball.
"Erin."
The student looks your way, shocked seeing the two of you so close. His shoulders relax as he shoves the fist into his pocket. Thankfully, you didn't have every period together. "See, i wasn't doing nothing."
You peck his cheek with a smile. "Good boy.
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bellarkeselection · 4 months
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for cole walter, could you do one where reader replaces jackie (so her fam died and she moved in with the walter’s) and cole doesn’t really like her. one day she gets a cold, and cole takes care of her (begrudgingly) and realizes she isn’t so bad 🫶🏼🥹
Cole Walter Does Care
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Tag list- send me an ask to be added @cognacdelights @connieisthesun
I rolled over in my bed and felt a headache coming on the second I woke up which really sucked. Slowly sitting up I thought I would feel better that only seemed to make it worse. My nose was beginning to get stuffy and my throat felt dry. Footsteps came from the hallway and I heard whoever it was pause outside my door. “Hey Y/n, my mom is making breakfast. Woah you don’t look too good.”
“Thanks Alex - uh I didn’t know that.” I started coughing and then reached over needing to blow my nose into some tissues.
He entered my room with a sad expression. “I can get my mom to check you out if you want.”
“Please do.” I whimpered, sounding so helpless tugging the covers back over my chest.
He nodded, rushing out of the room and going downstairs to go get her. “On it, Y/n.” Once he was gone I yanked the coves over my head screaming and coughing into my blankets.
“Sounds like there’s a dying angry animal in here. Oh no sorry it’s just you Y/n.” I noticed the voice of Cole who when I peaked my head above the blanket saw that he was leaning in my doorway.
Grumbling under my breath I really wasn’t in the mood for his teasing. “Go away Cole. I’m not feeling good and you’ll just make it worse.”
“Ah now I’m offended since most people find my company to be quite enjoyable.” He walked into my bedroom sitting down on the side of my bed moving the cover down from my eyes so he could see some of my face.
“Well I d-don’t-“ I attempted to say but another coughing fit had to hit me right before his mother and Alex came back into my bedroom.
Catherine sat down and pushed Cole off the bed, putting a hand to my forehead. “Oh you're burning up. You'll just have to stay in bed today and miss the fair.”
“Okay Skylar and Tara won't be happy.” I responded in a tired breath.
She shakes her head eyeing her older son. “I'm sure they'll understand honey. Cole, I need you to stay and take care of her.”
“What the hell!” He raised his voice, accidentally cursing at his mother.
I sat upright on the pillows but had a coughing fit as a result. “No! He doesn't need to be here…”
“This is not up for discussion. Y/n you are really sick and Cole you will be staying home to take care of her. Because you're grounded after we found out you were sneaking girls out of the house. Come on, Alex.” She got to her feet and she left with Alex following her downstairs leaving us alone in my bedroom together.
Laying my head back down on the pillows I yanked the covers over my head screaming into it until Cole made a comment. “Don't think I'm happy about this either.”
“Oh sure. I'm sorry my illness prevented you from hooking up with Erin or Olivia or Paige!” I snapped at him.
His green eyes glared at me. “You don't have the right to judge my life.”
“Neither do you about me then!” I growled turning my back towards him.
Cole watched me for a little while hearing me doze off for a few hours of sleep. He sure found you annoying at times but there was something about you that he liked. It was the fact that you fought with him over the most ridiculous stuff. Most girls just fell at his beck and call except you. He walked around the room noticing a notebook laying on the desk. “Y/n's diary…hmm. I can't deny that I may have feelings for Cole even though he drives me nuts.” He debated reading it but when he flipped to one of the middle he heard you groan waking up.
“Cole, I'm gonna puke.” I moaned, struggling to get out from under the blankets.
He dropped the book rushing over to me, he put one arm underneath my shoulder and the other under the back of my knees carrying me through the door and across to the bathroom on this floor. “I've got ya…I've got ya.” He reassured me when I collapsed onto my knees puking in the toilet.
I felt one of his hands holding my hair back and the other was rubbing my back till I was finished. “Thanks Cole…”
“You’re welcome. See I'm not a total asshole.” He responded sitting across from me on the floor. His honey blonde hair was tossed and in his eyes like always.
Hugging my knees to my chest, my hair was a wreck and my nose was red. I looked like a complete mess and I didn't care for it one bit. His green eyes remained on me before I asked him not to handle the silence well. “If you wanna say something to me just go on and get it out, Walter.”
“I read part of your diary after you fell asleep. I know how you feel about me and honestly I'm shocked given how I've treated you.” He shrugged his shoulders like it was just a casual thing to say to someone.
I raised my voice in frustration grabbing a tissue when I had to sneeze two or three times. “You read my diary! Cole, you have no right to that. How much did you read - god I want to crawl in a hole now I'm so embarrassed.” Covering my face that was red as a tomato avoiding his gaze.
“Aren't you going to ask me how I felt about it?” Cole questioned with a curious look on his face.
Knitting my brows at the former star football player. “You’re telling me you have a crush on me. Yeah right. I'll believe it in another universe.”
“Do you believe me when I do this?” He shifted onto his knees coming closer to me.
Lifting my head up he cut my question off. “What are you doing-” His lips landed right on mine. Cole scooted closer and placed his hands on either side of my face. I wanted to push him away because I was sick and two because he shouldn't even couldn’t really be kissing me now.
Trailing my hands up his chest my arms wrapped around his neck and he moaned into the kiss after we had gotten closer. Cole tugged me up to sit down on his lap wrapping his arms around my waist holding me close to his chest as possible. “Cole, stop - Cole stop. We can’t be doing this.” Pushing my hands on his chest he drew back confused.
“Because you're sick. I don't care about that. I just needed you to know that I actually care about you, Y/n.” He declared still cupping my face on his hands green eyes so focused on me.
Moving one hand through his honey hair, my other drops to his shoulder blade. “I can't believe it, Cole Walter has a crush on me. Here I was thinking you hated me.” I chuckled with a half grin.
“Why did you think I only picked on you when you first got here. I figured you had a thing for bad guys in you somewhere. Just had to bring it out of ya, darling.” Cole tucked hair behind my ear before he could hear a lot of footsteps heading up the wooden stairs outside the shut bathroom door.
“What do we - uh do!” I sneezed where Cole gave me a tissue and I wiped my nose watching him get to his feet.
He scooped me up bridal style once more where I wrapped my arms around his neck enjoying the feeling of being in his arms like this. “Don't worry, we'll go to my room. They all know better than to go in there…now where we're we?” He carried me quickly out and into his room, closing and locking the door.
“Cole, I'm nowhere near ready for that kind of thing. Sorry if that disappoints you.” I apologize for crawling under the covers on his bed, blushing a deep shade of red.
He kicked off his shoes and got in beside me, gently pushing my head down in the crock of his neck so I would fall asleep. “I don't care about sleeping with you yet. I just wanted to see you blush.”
“Cole!” I punched his chest hearing him laugh and it was music to me considering he rarely ever laughs.
He kissed the crown of my head and watched my eyes begin to close shut. “I'm just playing with ya, Y/n. Now get some rest.” I closed my eyes and looped my hand with his freehand that wasn't playing with hair to make me dose off in his arms.
Comments really appreciated ❤️
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ginkgo-phyta · 2 months
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heyy do you write for hotch? If yes can I request a fic with hotch falling asleep on reader's shoulder on the jet. like there are so many fics with reader sleeping on his shoulder and he's all soft about it and lets her. how would the bau react to see their tough boss just cuddle up with his girlfriend after a long case (it can be established relationship or before that too). thanku!
A/N: im screaming HAHA i LOVE THIS! i made this an established relationship hehe i hope you enjoy, my love! 
tagged spencer reid x reader because i want more people to see this teehee pls dont hate me i have spencer fics yall should read if you havent already but also you should still read this too
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fluff, BAU!reader, gender-neutral reader, mention of cannon type violence/hostage situation/nothing explicit or detailed, 1.8k words
“Hey, you okay?” Your tired eyes peered up at Aaron as he neared your seat on the jet, tie loosened and top button of his shirt undone. He had just gotten off the phone with the section chief, who, undoubtedly, scolded him as if he were a wayward adolescent. Although the smile he offered you in response was tight lipped and less-than-giving, his eyes told a different tale. They softened as they met yours, shedding their cold and hard façade to reveal a weary truth, littered with hints of desperation. 
This case had been long and grueling, tensions insurmountably higher than usual with Erin Strauss breathing down Hotch’s neck, scrutinizing every decision he and the rest of the team made. You barely got a chance to talk to Aaron about how he was doing, always being waved off by the older man with “We can talk later,” or “It doesn’t matter right now, let’s focus on the case,”. Begrudgingly, you obliged, understanding there was no point in pushing him. It would only add to his stress. Although the case was solved, the end was arduous. The unsub had taken a hostage and, with the rest of the BAU’s input, the negotiation tactics went a different way than what Erin deemed appropriate. 
A heavy sigh parted Aaron’s lips as he slumped into his seat, you could practically see steam of stress billowing off of him. “It’s fine, everything’s fine.” He spoke quietly, eyes closed, but you could tell he didn’t believe it to be true. 
“Strauss tear you a new one?” Rossi piqued from across the table. 
The unit chief huffed out a short laugh. “Nothing out of the ordinary.” Rossi just nodded at this, turning his attention back to his notepad. Hotch looked to the rest of his team as they settled into their desired spots, “Let’s all get some rest, alright?” 
Everyone wordlessly nodded, not having to be told twice. 
Aaron lazily turned his head to you with a book in your lap, “You, too, Agent.” He gave you a playfully pointed look.
You breathed out a quiet chuckle, “I will, don’t worry.” You shut the book and turned to give your beloved undivided attention, gazing into his suddenly undecipherable, deep hickory eyes. “You wanna talk about it?” 
He gently shook his head, eyelids feeling heavy as his blinks became slower and slower, “At home,” he whispered, your stomach doing a somersault at the notion. Aaron tried to fight sleep for just a few seconds longer, wanting to just stare at you for a bit.
You faced him, head leaned against the headrest, smile so warm and endearing. The way you chuckled at him was like getting a glimpse of heaven. He couldn’t wait to go home and have you all to yourself. The feeling of your arms wrapped around him was his life raft in the tumultuous storm of his emotions. It was hard for him to express what he was feeling all the time, but with you around his walls of reinforced concrete tumbled. Aaron gave you a small, sleepy smile.
Before he could say anything else, you spoke up. “Sleep,” it was a simple command, and the usually stubborn man melted into his seat at your word. 
You took a couple minutes longer to watch him immediately fall into a deep slumber, his breaths becoming deeper and longer, lips parted ever-so-slightly, eyebrows twitching here and there. With a breathy laugh, you fought the urge to reach up and caress his face and move the little stray strands of hair off of his forehead, still aware that your coworkers could witness such an intimate moment. The two of you had begun dating five months ago, but it wasn’t until three months later that you broke the news to the team. 
It had been a long time coming; for quite a while everyone knew about the feelings you harbored for your boss- even Hotch himself knew. You didn’t do a very good job of hiding it, taking every opportunity you could to blithely flirt with him. Some might just assume you did so in a similar way to how Penelope and Derek toy with each other, but the profilers knew in the back of their minds it wasn’t the case. Aaron fought you at first, pleading with you to stop calling him “handsome”, “big man”, or even “honey” in one case. You never gave in, though, buckling down on your efforts upon seeing the way he would chuckle caught off guard and almost blush in many instances. Slowly yet surely, he gave in to your teases. You burrowed your way into the stoic man’s heart, creating a place you would die before giving up. Aaron didn’t even realize it was happening until his world came crashing down on him one fateful evening. 
A routine questioning of a suspect had led to you getting held hostage, the man whose house you went to turning out to be the unsub. This had happened many times before in the history of the BAU, but for some reason Aaron was more on edge. There was no covert entrance into the home and the unsub refused to open up a line of communication with the agents, leaving everyone in the dark wondering what the state of your wellbeing was. Aaron had begun pacing back and forth in the tent they had set up outside the house you were being held in, hands held to his head. 
“Hotch, it’s going to be okay.” Derek stepped forward, trying to calm his superior’s nerves. 
“He’s right, Aaron.” Rossi piped in. “We’ve dealt with this before, we can fix this.”   
“No,” Hotch murmured back, “This isn’t the same. It’s not the same.” His pacing didn’t let up. “This is my fault, I should have told someone to go, too. I could have prevented this.”
The others held unspoken conversations within the glances they shared. 
“Hotch-” Emily tried to speak up, to convince him that wasn’t the case.
“NO!” He yelled suddenly, stopping in his tracks. “You don’t understand, I can’t lose them!” His voice was heavy with despair, eyes wide in anguish.
All eyes were trained on him, his coworkers at loss for words at the confession. 
“I can’t lose them…” Aaron mumbled this himself before roughly pushing out of the tent.
You smiled to yourself as you took a last glance towards the sleeping man next to you before turning back to your book. Safe to say, you were incredibly shocked when Aaron showed up on your doorstep in the dark of the night all those months ago, soaked in the rain, kissing you with a sense of urgency before you could even ask him what he was doing there. You bit your lip at the memory, but shook it out of your head to try and focus in on the jumbled words swimming in your lap. From the get-go, the two of you decided you would remain extremely professional around your coworkers, and you did just that. You stopped your teasing, for the most part at least, and made sure to never initiate physical contact on the job. Anyone that didn’t already know you were in a relationship would never have guessed. The most you allowed yourselves was sitting next to one another on the jet, just like you were doing now. 
An unintelligible murmur and huff sounding from your side drew your short-lived attention away from the delicate pages in front of you. Just as you were about to look over to Aaron and make sure he was okay, a heavy weight thumped onto your shoulder. His head. You were taken aback, a giggle slipping through your lips before you could help it. Your fingers flew up to your mouth, trying to keep yourself quiet as you noticed him shift a bit, making himself more comfortable. Sure, you’d accidentally fallen against Hotch’s shoulder in your sleep a couple times before the two of you entered a relationship, but never in a million years did you expect him to do the same to you. On the jet. In front of everyone. Of course, he couldn’t control his actions in his sleep, you reasoned. And maybe you should gently shrug him off to help retain his authority around the teasing profilers. But, this time, you fought off that thinking and gave in to your instinct. He had been so tense and strung out this entire case, you knew he needed this.
To hell with professionalism. You thought with a devilish grin, happy in your resolution. And so, you gently closed your book and slid it onto the table in front of you, trying your best to move as little as possible before leaning your head against his own and closing your eyes. With the gentle hum of the jet engines and the comforting sounds of Aaron’s breathing, you were lulled into a wonderful slumber in no time.
“Oh my God,” Emily breathed out, garnering the attention of Spencer who rested in the same group of seats as her. He looked up at her with one eye from where he was slumped over in his window seat, trying to get some shut-eye. 
“Huh?” the sleepy doctor grumbled, pushing himself a bit more upright when he noticed Emily looking at something on the other side of the jet, her face a mixture of shock and glee. 
The raven-haired agent began slapping Derek’s shoulder, who sat peacefully next to her with his eyes closed and headphones over his ears. His eyes flew open, looking over to Emily with annoyance as he took off his headphones, “What! What!”    
Immediately Emily shushed him, “Look!” she whispered, hand flying wildly in the air, eyes still unmoving. 
Derek followed her line of sight the scene before him pulling a laugh of disbelief from his lungs. “Well, well, well…” 
Emily’s hands covered her mouth in astonishment. “JJ!” she whispered over to the blonde who lay curled up on the sofa next to them. “Ugh,” she groaned quietly, unable to wake her coworker. 
“I can’t believe this,” she whispered mostly to herself, settling back in her seat, garnering a shake of Morgan’s head.
The view of their hard-headed unit chief sleeping peacefully on the shoulder of his subordinate, the latter’s head resting sweetly back on his was suddenly blacked by the side of Rossi’s body as he stuck his arm out, trying to get the best angle to immortalize this moment on camera.
“Good for them,” Morgan grinned, his voice proudly announcing his amusement as he put his headphones back over his head.
“Rossi, you better send me that!” Emily spoke up just a little bit louder, the old man looking back and motioning his phone towards her in acknowledgement.
“What? What!?” Spencer whisper-yelled, unsuccessfully craning his head above and between the seats to get a glimpse of what all the hubbub was about, “What are you guys looking at!?”    
“Penelope’s gonna flip,” Emily mumbled to herself, a teasing smile playing on her face as she looked down at the picture Rossi sent her. Without a second thought, she saved the photo onto her phone. They’re never gonna live this down.     
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A/N: i hope you liked this!! i had a fun time writing it ehehe hotch is such a dilf, like an ACTUAL dilf im not even attracted to fathers but hotch?? all day, every day, baby!
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strawberryforks · 4 months
Text
the cole walter effect // cole walter x reader
summary: you fall victim to the cole walter effect, then he, falls for you.
warnings: swearing
word count: 1850
a/n: requests/asks open and encouraged! <3
one look and you were a goner. two, and you were a blushing mess, sitting beside erin, your best friend. desks pushed up against each other, wondering what business letters had in maths class and what business cole walter had being so… so him, you toyed with the mechanical pencil in your hand, pushing the led in and out.
even acting like a jackass, cole had a sweet smile and was the king of gestures—grand or otherwise. hanging around him could light up you day (or darken it substantially depending on his mood) but mostly, cole walter made you feel special for however long you managed to keep his attention.
since he’d hurt his leg and lost his spot on the football team he’d been treating everyone awfully. you, erin, the dozens of other girls he led on, his parents, siblings, himself. it wasn’t like cole but it didn’t seem like there was much anyone could do…
you made a point to cherish the good moments even more.
when someone bumped into you in the hallways he scooped up your books and handed them to you. “sorry about that, y/n, some people don’t pay enough attention to their surroundings,” he watched the perpetrator retreat, glaring at their back all while helping you up.
when you two skipped school together and he brought you to his favourite spot. the sun beat down on the lake and reflected on your faces. “happiness looks good on you, sunshine,” he’d been trying out stupid nicknames all day and none of them stuck, not until then, you scrunched your nose and shook your head, laughing at him and he smiled back. you’d listen to that stupid nickname every day for the rest of your life if that was your reward.
and that time you got stuck walking in the rain. it was storming and you were supposed to be on your way to his house—to hangout with danny, but still. when you were late he cared enough to call your mom and when she said you’d left on foot fifteen minutes ago he was out the door in no time at all. he pulled up alongside you and let you climb into his truck even soaking wet. “sunshine, you’re shaking,” you were, you were drenched and chilled to the bone. “here.” he shrugged off his jacket, gave it to you, and cranked the heat. your teeth chattered while you thanked him and he brushed it off, said: “no worries; it’s nothing.” what he didn’t know is that it was everything.
you felt bad for cole walters and his devilish grin but you felt other things too. in that ooey gooey crush phase where a wink could turn you bright red and you treasured each and every conversation—dissected each word and then talked about it with your best friend.
“he’s pretty, i’ll give him that.” she said, giving you the sense that wasn’t all. “but?” you encouraged.
“but he’s kind of an ass and he stopped treating me right a long time ago. casual hookups are all he can offer, y/n.”
you’d be fine with that and you love erin but you don’t really believe her. no, it’s not that you don’t believe in her it’s just… you believe in cole. believe he can do better, be better, and be more.
still, her tone worries you. you know something’s up so you push a bit. you’ve known her since you were in diapers and cole was her off-and-on-again boyfriend for quite awhile. you have a crush on him but who doesn’t? falling prey to what dozens of your peers have dubbed the cole effect is almost easier than breathing in this tiny town. “are you sure you’re okay with—“ you gesture between you and then point out the window to where the eldest walter boy stands talking to his twin, danny. there’s no other way to explain it, really. there is no you and cole, you’re just hoping that one day there could be. erin looks out the window, “to clarify you’re talking about cole, right?”
you nod quick and when she seems relieved your mouth tumbles open. you gasp and erin’s hand flies to the back of her neck, cheeks turning red, “yeah,” she admits. “i’m suddenly only okay with you going after one of the walter boys.”
“you like danny!” you whisper-shout. “that’s fantastic, that’s just so great! i’ve known him for ages i can totally set you up. would it be okay if i gave him your number?” erin nods, grateful, and you can’t wipe the grin off of your face all day.
you see danny and rush over to him. you pluck his phone out of his hand and he messes up your hair with his hand, “i’m just putting erin’s number in!” you defend, “she’s interested in acting” and you, you omit, “and since you’re the best actor i know, i figured you could help her out!”
danny smiles and stuffs his hands into his pockets and shakes his head. he’s your other best friend, the one you tell all of your walter free drama. to spare his sanity, not once have you mentioned your massive crush or burdened him with your boy-problems. boy-problem, you corrected, seeing as there was only one. “you coming over after school?”
“only if you’ve got room!”
“we do. always. and see if your friend erin wants to come with.”
your excitement is palpable as you nod quickly. Then, you skip off to find erin, plans already forming in your mind.
You’re the first one to the car–you call shotgun and slide into the passenger seat, looking at cole. earlier, you’d slipped issac, lee, and nathan $10 bills to manoeuvre themselves so erin and danny would have to sit next to each other. To add insult to injury, or the cherry to your sundae of a master plan, you slip issac an extra $5. he sits with his legs spread and rests his elbows on his thighs hunched over. he sits his backpack beside him and when erin figured out where she had to sit–having only half a seat’s worth of space, you swear, she had a mini-aneurysm or something. you almost felt bad. erin glared but you played dumb you did feel bad. a little. until cole hit a bump and looking in the mirror you saw them holding hands. a victory, a smile, now it was your turn.
being cole walter’s friend was surprisingly easy. turns out, he just needed someone to really hear him. To really listen. Sure, to get to that point you had to push a little (but two shouting matches later and) “it’s just–there was all this pressure on me to make a comeback. I love footbal, i do, but it doesn’t change the fact that my foot is fucked. mom and dad spent all this money on my rehab and it’s still useless.” you hugged him tight, “but you’re not. Not useless.” he sighed, holding onto you, like the lifeline you allowed yourself to be. he didn’t believe you when you told him he was worthy, that he was good at things other than football, but maybe one day.
winning over cole took more attention to detail and care. care was the big thing–thoughtfulness, kindness, creativeness. cole walter does things for people and he doesn’t have to be asked or begged. you’re certain his love language is acts of service and yours is a combination of several. you like physical touch as much as the next person, gift giving, and quality time. when you combine all three? it’s his turn to blush.
you find field and pick a handful of flowers–all as close to his favourite colour you could find. you arrange them in a tinted and curved glass vase you found at the thrift and you write him a letter. when you deliver your gift, passing it over, your hands touch. “who’s this for?” he asks, confusion present on his face. He’s thinking maybe it’s for his mom, maybe parker?, when you tap your index finger against the envelope and he reads his own name. he’s caught off guard. he takes the gift, thanks you somewhat awkwardly and then walks off. (you think you failed until he returned the sentiment the next day and you found flowers in your locker)
the next thing that you do isn’t even intentional. you don’t do it to make cole like you more, it just happens that way. “Hey!” you shout, walking up to the new quarterback. “taking his number and flaunting it around like that–well that’s a real shit thing to do.” lake houses with colourful chairs aren’t made for confrontations like these. nor are you usually, not in front of your peers at least. but after a cup full of liquid confidence, well, you’re in the middle of a truth or dare game and things are about to get messy. you’re to his left and if he leans in the only kiss he’ll receive is from your knuckles. “i dare you,” he rolls his eyes, “i pick truth.” you scoff and when some of his friends laugh too, one crowing “what are you, scared?” he doesn’t budge. “truth, then. do you think you’re better than cole?” he gulps, “even with an injured leg he’s a better person and player than you could ever dream of being.” cole watches from the sidelines, ready to intervene if necessary but also… he’s thinking. thinking hard and wondering where the hell you came from.
he taught you how to ride horses, you taught him how to paint–painted him, actually, which his mom just thought was the best thing in the entire world. “she’s so sweet, george.” katherine told her husband, “she’s so good to him. just what he needed.”
you take the liberty of walking him to a few of his classes and he pays you back by driving you places–your home, his, issac jokingly called you cole’s passenger princess and the second eldest walter boy didn’t correct him. being cole’s anything gave you butterflies.
but still. the one step you wouldn’t take was the one that took him the longest–it was the label that stopped him, that scared him. the exclusivity (he hadn’t so much as flirted with anyone else since you two started hanging out more) and the fear of error, of messing up. a month later was when he finally asked you to be his girlfriend. the two of you went on a picnic (he cooked all of the food but didn’t tell you in case there was something there that you didn’t like) and brought you flowers and a letter. “who’s this for?” you asked, grinning. it was a full circle–one with a curved line and two dots inside of it. you were beaming and when you finished reading the letter you threw yourself into his arms. your hands found both sides of his face and you pressed your lips against his.
the cole walter effect got you, but you weren’t mad about it.
349 notes · View notes
sweatervest-obsessed · 5 months
Text
Wasteland, Baby
Pairing: Spencer Reid x Reader
WC: 3.4k
TW: Mentions of Murders, mentions of suicide, discussion of suicide, trauma, emotional turmoil, death, arguing, abandonment issues, commitment issues, Angst, some fluff
A/N: Thanks for bearing with me as I try to get off the struggle bus y'all. here is the highly anticipated part 2 of Stick Season !
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All the fear and the fire of the end of the world Happens each time a boy falls in love with a girl Happens great, happens sweet Happily, I'm unfazed here, too
It had been three years since you left the BAU and you had just turned down a job at the FBI from Erin Strauss. You never heard from her again. 
But you did attend her funeral in D.C a week later.
You didn’t alert any of the BAU that you were returning for her funeral, since you could only imagine the pain they were feeling. 
The plane ride was filled with thoughts of what life would have been like if you had rejoined the FBI. Maybe she wouldn't have died. Maybe she’d still be calling you and sending you email after email with job offers. 
You had quickly stopped by the wake, the day before, to pay your respects, and give Strauss’ family your deepest condolences. It was painful, seeing someone you spoke to last week, stiff, lifeless, in a coffin where they will be for the rest of time. 
But the worst part was the burial. 
Blending in at a funeral has never been a strong suit of the BAU’s, except for you. You were calm, respectful, and blended in with the rest of the spectators. 
Until you looked across the circle and saw Aaron Hotchner looking directly at you. Whatever he had been feeling before, was quickly wiped away when you looked back at him, confirming his suspicions that you were here, in the graveyard. The look on his face was replaced with a more somber one as he redirected his attention back to the priest, but you knew you would be unable to just leave now that you had been spotted. 
Once she had been lowered into the ground, Hotch made his way towards you, catching his colleges interested. Where was he going? Who was he looking for?
“Y/n.” 
You smiled at him. It didn’t reach your eyes, but it wasn;t fake either. 
“It’s good to see you Hotch.” 
“I didn’t know you were going to be here today.” 
You nodded and looked over as the rest of the people migrated towards their cars to go to the reception afterwards. “I didn’t make it public information, considering I was planning on leaving after the ceremony. I’m just here to pay my respects Hotch.” 
“She called you.” 
“Yes she did.” 
“And she said you turned it down.” 
“I did.”
“Why.” 
“Hotch, please.” 
He took your elbow and pulled you away from the people, giving the two of you some semblance of privacy. 
“Will you at least think about it?” 
“What is there to think about Hotch? I don’t want to—” 
“I wish you wouldn’t lie to me. I know you miss it Y/n. I’m not just some colleague, and you know that.” 
You closed your eyes and pinched your brow. You knew coming to this funeral was a mistake. But some part of you, one that you had silenced for a very long time, was starting to break through. 
“We can talk later.” 
Wasteland, baby I'm in love, I'm in love with you
“I cannot believe you’re going back.” 
You sighed and continued to pack up everything you owned into boxes. You had only broken down the ones from a few years ago–that same part of you had saved them for whenever you had recognized you were ready to be back in Washington D.C. 
“Don’t ignore me. I thought you were done with hunting bad guys and certain doctors with glasses.” 
You slammed your hands on the table, causing Lucille to jump. 
“Sorry.” You muttered and slowly sunk to the ground, deciding it was just easier to sit on the ground and have a breakdown rather than talk it out. 
“I’m not going back for him…I’m going back for me. This…” You ran a hand through your hair. “This is n’t what I was meant to do, Luce. I’m not a teacher. I’m okay at it, but…I was meant to be in the field. Teaching is challenging, but not in the way I need. And fuck, I love my kids, you know that I do, but it’s just…”
“It’s not who you are.” She came and sat down next to you, taking your hand in hers. “I’m gonna miss you asshole.” 
You rested your head on her shoulder and squeezed her hand. “I’m going to miss you so much.” You whispered back to her. 
“You have to visit me. I’ll get lonely up here.” 
A smile spread across your face as a tear slowly tracked down your cheek. “ You have my permission to hunt me down and beat the shit out of me if I don’t.” 
“Oh don’t worry, I will.” 
All the things yet to come are the things that have passed Like the holding of hands, like the breaking of glass Like the bonfire that burns That all words in the fight fell to
Your desk stayed pretty empty for the first two weeks you were back—like you were terrified that if you got too comfortable, life would pull the rug right out from under you again and you’d have to leave. 
It was Garcia who first noticed this, watching as you’d pack everything up into your tote bag each night before you would go home. She didn’t say anything about it though, since you were not the same girl the BAU had grown to know. 
You were different, quieter. You spoke when you had something to add, or to correct somebody, but you never participated in the banter; you never stayed longer than absolutely necessary. If the group had decided to surprise you at your new apartment, they would find it covered in boxes—walls bare, fridge almost empty, only essentials like clothes and toothbrush unpacked. 
But you had never been better. Hotch had you start consulting side cases when you came back, a way to get you used to the routine of being back in the office, back in the FBI. You would consult up to three new cases a day, still helping with those that would call back a day or week later for updates or more help. They watched as you easily solved things in minutes, that might have taken the team hours. 
The first time Morgan called you ‘Girl Genius’ to your face, you punched him in the arm (admittedly a bit harshly). But he wasn’t wrong. You could feel the continuous excitement flowing through your veins; your muscles flexing as you settled back into the thing you were the best at. 
You were different, but better. 
Spencer noticed this too. He watched as you confidently answered every question thrown at you. He watched as you consulted on cases and noticed patterns he had missed. 
Spencer had missed you, badly. He knew he fucked up when he had left that night, needed to go and he spend the night away, thinking about his life; his future. Panic had flooded his body at the thought of you being the one forced to take care of him, forced to deal with his shit history and addictive personality and his annoying ass rambles. He didn’t want to subject you to that. 
But then he remembered the look on your face—the pure excitement and adoration at the thought of being able to spend every single minute of your life calling him yours. And once the panic had subsided, he felt that same joy. 
When he got back to the house, you weren’t there. 
You weren’t at work either. 
You had just vanished, and about a day later, all of your things had disappeared too. 
And Spencer was a fucking wreck. He was useless at work, and he spent so much time trying to find you, but Penelope wasn’t able to find a thing, and by the time she did, it had been months later, and you clearly didn’t want to be found. 
Wasteland, baby I'm in love, I'm in love with you
It didn’t help that seeing you again in Vermont made him want to melt on the spot. A great deal of relief washed over him, seeing you were alive and in front of him. But then he felt the anger rise in him. You had abandoned him, you had just disappeared without a second thought. 
Then he remembered the look on your face when he panicked about marrying you.
You had thought he didn’t want to marry you. 
You had no idea that he felt like he was the the problem, and if he told you know, it would just sound like a fucking excuse. 
Watching you walk back into the bullpen and set up at your desk was another slap in the face. It feels like nobody tells him anything, because they don’t. But then he realized that only Hotch knew about it because everyone froze on the spot seeing you sitting at your desk, working. 
At his desk, he would just watch you. On the plane, he would watch you. And he tried so hard to be nonchalant about it, but he couldn’t take his eyes off of you. Your hair, your legs, your arms, your lips—he wanted to take your hand and never let you go, fusing your skin together so he could be with you always. 
He was in love with you. And he thought you would rather die than be seen with him again. 
If only he knew that you felt the same way—you loved him right back. 
And that day that we'll watch the death of the sun To the cloud and the cold and those jeans you have on And you'll gaze unafraid as they sob from the city roofs
After about three months, infinite pining, a few longing glances passed to one another, and incessant whining from Derek Morgan, you and Spencer Reid found yourselves together at coffee one morning. 
After about a month later, you found yourself back in his apartment, lips grazing his, not being able to tell where his body ended and yours started. 
Then, the next day, he told you he loved you. 
He didn’t see you for a whole week afterwards. 
But when he walked into work that monday, and you were sitting at your desk, completely unbothered, he took it upon himself to make you talk to him. 
No one else was around, except for Hotch. But his office door was closed, and Morgan wouldn’t be around for another ten minutes anyways. 
“Where the fuck have you been?” 
You turned around in your chair and glared at him. “Excuse me?” 
“You disappeared for a week, no word about where you were going, not even telling me you were leaving.” 
You rolled your eyes. “Not now Spence.” 
“I love you.” 
“What?” 
“I still love you.” 
Your jaw dropped. “Spencer…” 
“I’m dead serious Y/n. When you weren’t here after you spent the night, I lost my fucking mind. I thought I had lost you—again. And I wasn’t about to go through that again. I had fucked up once before and I—I thought you had realized you didn’t want to be with me anymore and you had left again.” 
You were silent as he rambled on. 
“When you left three years ago, I lost my fucking mind. I sat here, staring at your desk hoping you would materialize out of thin air just so that I could apologize to you. And then when you didn’t show up, I begged Penelope to tell me where you had run off to, so I could go and find you and beg for you to listen to me while I got on my hands and knees to beg for your forgiveness. You thought I didn’t want to marry you, but I was terrified because I thought you wouldn’t want to marry me. I mean I had just gotten sober, and I thought we were doing so well and then you brought up marriage and all I could think about was how it was another way for you to find out how much you could hate me and get sick of me since—” 
You had finally snapped out the shock you were feeling and placed your hand over his mouth. “Breathe.” 
Spencer shoved your hand off his mouth, but stayed silent, taking an over exaggerated breath to prove to you he did. 
“We can talk about this later.” 
“No.” Spencer shook his head. “We’re going to talk about this now. I want to talk about this now.” 
“Spencer…” 
“How do I know that you’re not going to just pack up and disappear again.” 
“Spencer seriously? I don’t—-”
“You don’t do that? Because we both know you do. You’ve done it twice now.”
“What do you want me to say Spence?” 
“That you still love me.” His voice was low, but his eyes were locked in on yours. “I need to know if you still love me.” 
Wasteland, baby I'm in love, I'm in love with you
The Next Week
Another Day, Another Psychopath Killer. 
Another way for you to throw yourself into the line of fire because you have always had a soft spot for teenagers. 
Someone was targeting suicidal teens, convincing them to end their own lives, merely making him complicit in their deaths. It had sent you (and JJ) reeling. Both of you had lost someone to suicide, and watching as this person preyed on vulnerable kids who deserved to live and be loved took a lot out of the both of you. 
You had a bad feeling about this case when it was first passed onto your desk, but it just got worse and worse as the week went on. If only you had figured out who it was sooner, you might have been able to save this one girl’s life. But sometimes life refuses to relent. 
The jet was silent on the way back, none of you wanting to speak and break the silence. 
Spencer sat next to you on the couch, offering a comforting presence, and nothing else. He knew you (and it bugged the shit out of you). Years of being with one another meant that he knew when you were upset, and he knew that you despised being touched while you were like this, but you hated being alone. 
It bugged you so much, but you weren’t going to say a damn thing because having him next to you while you sat and listened to your music and spiraled was exactly what you needed. 
He only offered his hand when the plane hit some turbulence, and your entire body began to shake unconsciously. It was between the two of you, and all he did was flip it, so the palm was upwards. It was an invitation that you could immediately ignore and refuse if you wanted to. 
But something in you caused your hand to drop next to his and lace your fingers through his. 
God was it so fucking warm, and soft. You wondered if he still used the lotion you had recommended to him all those years ago when he would complain to you about his hands being “gross” and “too dry”. He absolutely did. 
He managed to hide his smile when you took his hand, but he did give yours a soft squeeze, and continued to read his book, pretending that his insides weren’t aflame and his mind was anywhere but on the words in front of him. 
He didn’t turn a page for over four minutes once your hand was in his. 
And I love too that love soon might end Be known in its aching Shown in the shaking Lately of my wasteland, baby Be still, my indelible friend, you are unbreaking Though quaking, though crazy That's wasteland, baby
That Night
“Thank you.” 
It was the first thing you had said in over five hours, including the plane ride. Once the plane had landed, you and Spencer went back to his apartment, and the two of you had sat in his living room, in silence. He didn’t mind, as long as he could keep an eye on you. 
Your mind was far far away. It was back in college. Thinking about your friend and about the life you could have lived if she was still with you. 
Spencer had left a cup of tea next to you, your favorite, and sat on the couch. You were situated in the chair by the window, staring out into the night, watching as the rain drops raced down the window and as the lights blurred together. 
He was close enough to provide you with some comfort, but far enough away to let you have whatever space you needed.
“Spence?” 
He snapped out of his head, looking towards you. Your eyes were tired, and your body reflected the same type of exhaustion. 
“Sorry. What do you need?” 
“I—.” You interrupted yourself with a yawn, cursing under your breath. “Shit sorry. I should probably go..” 
“It’s okay if you stay.” 
You looked out the window then back at him. 
“I’m not just saying that to get you into my bed—oh my god that came out wrong, I just mean I don’t want you out in that weather and I don’t really like the idea of you being alone tonight, especially after this case because—” 
“Spencer.” 
“---yeah?” 
“I’ll stay.” 
“O-oh. Good. good…” He nodded. “I can uh, take the couch and you can have the bed.” 
You rolled your eyes and smiled slightl;y. “You’re a gentleman, Doctor Reid, but I’m not kicking you out of your bed.” 
“But I—”
“Spence.” 
He huffed, crossing his arms as you just laughed softly to yourself, amused. 
“Why don’t we both go get ready. Together.” 
“Together?” 
You nodded. “Yeah Spence.” 
“Okay.” 
Spencer stood up, and offered his hand to you. 
And for the second time today, you took it. 
When the stench of the sea and the absence of green Are the death of all things that are seen and unseen Are an end but the start of all things that are left to do
And maybe the two of you would never be together ever again. Maybe you would. 
But something about the way Spencer would make your favorite tea, 
or the way he would save you the crossword puzzle on his morning newspaper since he knew how much you loved to solve as much as you could without his help, 
or when he would leave you notes on your desk, making you feel like a giddy high schooler all over again, or when he felt like a good start to something new
or when he would kiss you good morning and good night, promising you he’d be there whenever you woke up
or when he slowly got rid of things in his apartment to create space for your things as you moved in slowly 
or whenever a case was particularly rough for the both of you and he wouldn’t pester you to talk to him about it, instead offering his hand for you to take, and squeezing it, letting you know he was there for you
or the way he would take you on small vacations up to Vermont so you could go see all of your friends and escape from the world of the FBI
or the way he would never storm out of the apartment after an argument, but still give you the space you needed so you could both decompress without getting at each other's throats
or when he whispered every thing he would do for you for the rest of your lives so help him god when he thought you were asleep in his arms
or how he would whispered ‘I love you’ to you as you passed by while you both were working
or when he would never let you run off in the middle of the night because you would panic about whether or not this was all a dream, and one day he would wake up and not love you anymore
or when he got down on one knee and proclaimed his undying love for you, hoping you’d promised to love him forever in the same way he loved you, wanting to be with you, wanting to be near you always
made you feel like everything might be okay after all. 
Wasteland, baby I'm in love, I'm in love with you
421 notes · View notes
piedinthepiper · 3 months
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You owe me (pt. 2) ☆
Mafia!Jungkook x psychologist!reader x mafia!Taehyung (slightly)
Summary: His efforts seem pointless. But when it comes to jealousy, anger and you, he just can’t help himself. And neither can you.
Warnings: yandere!Jungkook, dubcon, stalking?, breaking and entering, mention of murder, mention of other types of crimes, angst, weapons (a knife), cursing, male m, descriptive smut, angst
Wc: 7.4k
A/n: Thank you guys so much for all the feedback on this fic. Since so many wanted a part 2 I made a part 2! Hope you like it!
Disclaimer: This is 100% fiction. I am in no way saying that this is how any member of bts would act. Nor do I condone the actions detailed in the story. This is purely for entertainment purposes only. If any of the warnings trigger you, or you’re under 18 ¡do not read! I’m not your mother, and I don’t take any accountability for what you decide to read online!
Parts: | 1 | 2 |
Your back felt a sudden relief as you finally laid down in bed. It had been a long day. A very long day. A new patient took up almost all you time. Taehyung Kim. He was being charged with robbery and murder, and his lawyer had hired you to potentially give him a diagnosis that could help him in court.
You had to assign some of your other patients to a few of your coworkers, just to make time for him. But this is what you love doing. You wanted to help. Especially now, after what you learned about your entire career. You wanted to prove yourself. You knew you were good.
You turned off you lights and put your phone on the nightstand. Finally you were in the comfort of your own bed. Ready to fall asleep and dream the night away. Trying not to think about how early you had to wake up tomorrow. You had finally found a comfortable sleeping position after squirming around a bit. You felt all your muscles relax, starting to recognise the slow fade of sleep.
But suddenly a loud noice filled the room. Your body tensed again, jumping at the sudden sound. You rolled your eyes as you turned around, annoyed at yourself that you forgot to turn on ‘do not disturb’. Your phone screen lit up in your face, you squinted at the bright light hitting your eyes. You managed to decipher a message from an unknown number. You didn’t open it, writing a mental note to check it out tomorrow. If it was one of your patients they would have to wait until the morning. It was almost unprofessional to answer a text at 1 am.
You entered the doors to your workplace, expecting to see Erin behind the counter smiling at you.
“Good morning, Erin.”
You said like you always do. You halted once you saw her sitting there, not smiling, not saying anything. She just looked at you with a concerning look. Before you could ask her what’s wrong you looked over at the waiting chairs. You had seen a person in your peripheral view, something that was odd considering the office wasn’t even open to patients yet. You quickly understood what was going on once you saw who was sitting there.
“Good morning, Doctor.”
His familiar voice filled the dead quiet room. It had almost been a year since you last saw him. He had not contacted you after the incident in your office. You had almost, almost, forgotten him. But there he was, looking the exact same as you remembered him.
“Mr. Jeon.”
You stated. Not really knowing what to say. You were caught off guard by the whole situation. Some naive part of you thought that he had gotten what he wanted and would leave you alone. Forever.
“I thought you had stopped calling me that. Aren’t we more intimate at this point?”
You sighed at his question. Looking over at Erin for a second to see if she understood what he meant.
“He said he wanted to see you. I told him we wer-“
“It’s fine Erin, Mr. Jeon can be quite persuasive.”
You interrupted her as she started to apologise for letting him in. You looked back to him. His classic smirk was plastered on his face.
“I have an hour before my first patient arrives.”
You said and looked quickly at your wristwatch, before starting to walk down the hall towards your office. You heard his footsteps following behind you.
Once inside your office you took off your jacket and hung it up before sitting down behind your desk. He was quick to sit down on the sofa. A sense of deja vu washed over you.
“Why are you here, Jungkook?”
He looked confused by your question.
“You didn’t see my messages? Or my voicemails?”
It was your turn to look confused, as you couldn’t remember getting any texts or calls from him.
“Maybe you were asleep, I don’t know.”
He shrugged. You remembered the message from last night. The one you didn’t bother to read. You picked your phone up from your bag, turning off ‘do not disturb’. Hundreds of notifications from the same number appeared on your lock screen.
“You were the one that messaged me last night?”
You asked as you opened your phone.
“So you did read them?”
He asked in excitement. You shook your head at his question, too focused on your phone. You opened iMessage and hit the top notification. A series of long paragraphs of text appeared.
“I didn’t think it was you.”
You mumbled as you scrolled upwards trying to get to the start of what he had sent you.
“Listen, I’ll just tell you. It feels weird to watch you read something I poured my heart into.”
You looked up at him, before you put the phone down on your desk. Crossing your arms over your chest.
“Be quick.”
He thought for a second about where to start and what the most important things to tell you were.
“I just wanted to tell you that I’m ready now.”
The room went quiet as you waited for him to continue. He didn’t.
“What are you talking about?”
You asked confused.
“That’s the brief version of it. You told me to be quick.”
You rolled your eyes at him.
“I think I need a little more than that.”
He smiled at you like a child telling a joke for the first time. He leaned slightly forward, resting his elbows on his knees.
“I’ve seen another psychologist. He’s helped me a lot. I’m doing well, I’m not some self absorbed dick, I’m not so angry anymore. And I’ve gotten to know your father as well. I’ve done my end of the promise, now it’s your turn, y/n.”
He got serious at the last sentence. Shifting his eyes from the innocent doe, to the man you remembered from your last meeting.
“You went to my father?”
You asked in shock, not caring for whatever he said after that.
“Yeah. Might as well get to know my future father-in-law a little better while I fulfilled my promise.”
You let your head fall down to your hands, and let out a long sigh. Visibly showing him that you were upset.
“I’m happy you’re doing better, I really am. But I did not promise you anything. Definitely not to marry you.”
His eyes changed again. You could tell he was upset.
“Don’t you think you owe me that?”
He asked slyly, cocking his head slightly to the side. You shook your head.
“You can’t hold that over my head forever. It’s not fair!”
You answered strictly.
“I’m not holding it over your head, baby. I’m asking you.”
“Well, then my answer is no. I don’t owe you shit. Now get out of my office.”
You answered quickly. Wanting him to leave so you didn’t get too upset, and started making bad decisions again.
“We don’t have to get married right away, or not at all if you just want to be my girlfriend.”
He offered. You suddenly stood up from your chair, pointing angrily towards the door.
“Out.”
You said.
“I don’t care if I owe you. I don’t care if you’ve gotten better. You’re still a mobster, you’re still a murderer and you’re still a sociopath. I could never date you. I could never even be friends with you. Don’t you understand?”
You ranted when he didn’t leave the sofa. He shook his head and kept his eyes on the floor.
“It’s him isn’t it?”
He asked, still not looking up at you. He was frightening like that. You felt the same fear, you felt the first time he talked to you like that. He was showing his true colours.
“Who?”
You asked carefully as you sat back down again. He looked up at you with anger and jealousy in his eyes.
“Your new patient. The jailbird, you spend a lot of time with him.”
You rolled your eyes.
“Yes, and? He’s nothing but my patient.”
“Are you sure? I’ve seen him on the news, he’s quite attractive. Just your type.”
You scoffed and gave him an offended look.
“Yes I’m sure. Who are you to accuse me of having an affair with a patient?”
“Because you had one with me.”
You sighed.
“We did not have an affair.”
You stated, not daring to look him in the eyes.
“Then what do you call it?”
The room got quiet. To be honest you never thought about what you would call it. You didn’t want to think about it at all. It went against everything you stood for.
“Please, just leave.”
You said, you felt your eyes getting watery for some reason. Maybe it was because you were scared, or surprised. Or maybe even sad to see him again.
“I can tell you’re upset. We still need to work things out. Can we talk sometime? Not here, somewhere not so formal.”
You looked up at him again. His eyes were soft, he seemed to really care that you were affected negatively by this. For some reason you found it endearing.
“You can come to my place, we can talk and-“
“There’s no way I’m voluntarily going to your place.”
You interrupted him. He looked down in defeat for a few seconds.
“Please, y/n. I just want to show you that I’m better. I want to show you all I’ve done for you. I don’t want to argue with you.”
He said softly. His eyes were also teary now. You hated yourself for getting affected by his feelings. You hated that you thought this was a tender moment.
“Do you promise that we’ll only be talking?”
You asked. Not knowing why you were agreeing to this in the first place. Maybe you were naive, but it seemed that he actually had changed. Even if he still was delusional and obsessive.
“Of course, I would never do anything to harm you. I love you.”
He said, slightly excited. The room got quiet once again. You had silently agreed to meet him at his place.
“I’ll send you the address. I’ll see you on Thursday.”
He said, before getting up and walking out the door.
“Wait-“
You tried to say, but he was already gone. You wouldn’t be able to make it on Thursday.
You sat down at the table, waiting for the guards to bring in Mr. Kim. This week had been stressful. Not only because of your case with Mr. Kim, but also because of all your other patients. It was hard having time for them while handling such a big case as his. You had to work overtime the entire week, and you were exhausted.
“Good afternoon, y/n.”
He said as two guards brought him in. He had learned your first name quickly, and refused to use your title or last name.
“Hello, Mr. Kim. How are you?”
He smiled, and waited to answer until the guards had chained his legs to the table and left the room. You never felt unsafe being alone with him, even if he was a convicted murderer. His hands were always handcuffed, the same with his legs, so he couldn’t reach you. You knew the guards watched you from outside the big tinted glass. It allowed you to lower your guard, and treat him like you treat your other patients.
“I’m doing amazing now that you’re here.”
He said and smirked. Like Jungkook said, he was attractive. His hair was always combed back, and the all grey clothing actually suited him. He had some kind of lightning tattoo that went up his neck, due to his clothing you didn’t know if he had any more of them.
“How are you, sweetheart?”
He asked back. Still keeping intense eye contact with you.
“We did talk about not calling me anything but my name, do you remember that?”
You asked him strictly. He chuckled.
“It’s hard not to call you something you are, don’t you like compliments?”
You started taking off your coat. It was cold when you entered, but with two people in the little room it was too warm to keep your wool coat on.
“We’re not here to talk about me. I’ve given you permission to use my first name, that’s all.”
You said as you draped the coat over your chair. You looked back at him, he wasn’t looking you in your eyes anymore. This time his eyes were focused on your exposed cleavage. You hadn’t worn low cut tops with him yet, only oversized jumpers due to the weather. You suddenly became very aware of yourself and pulled your top up, trying to hide more of your cleavage. His eyes went back to your face, and you decided that you would wear something less revealing next time.
“Whatever you say, y/n.”
He put extra pressure on your name this time. You gave him a small smile, before you looked down at your notes.
“Why don’t we start were we ended things? Do you remember what I told you I wanted us to talk about?”
He sighed, but nodded.
“My teenage years?”
He asked. You nodded back at him.
“I was a good teenager, I didn’t do drugs, I came home before my curfew, did well in school.”
He memorised.
“But I did like girls. I really did. It was my weakness.”
He said, quickly flickering his eyes down to your cleavage again.
“Why do you say it was your weakness?”
You asked, writing it down in your notes. He started smirking again.
“Since I was such a good teenager, I stayed home a lot. After I did my homework or studied for tests I didn’t have anything to do. Until I found porn.”
He let out a groan, almost like he was in pleasure just by the thought.
“I would spend all day just jerking off to random girls online. Whenever I saw a pretty girl outside I would go straight home and jerk off to her too.”
You felt yourself getting a bit uncomfortable at his bluntness, but didn’t say anything to let him continue. You focused on your notes instead.
“It would take up my entire day, I felt crazy at times. And now that I don’t have anything to do, I find myself doing the same in my cell.”
You nodded, still looking down at your notes. Not wanting to look at him while he talked about something so intimate.
“But the only one I can think about is you.”
He said almost as if he was out of breath. You finally looked at him. And saw that one of his hands had slid under the waistband of his trousers.
“Come over here and sit on me, baby.”
He moaned. You didn’t know what to do or say, you froze. The door opened and two guards came in.
“No- please! Y/n! Please fuck me! I need you. I fucking need you so bad!”
He yelled as he was practically carried out of the room. You sat there speechless, in the now empty room.
“I think it’s best for him to have a male psychologist, I can no longer treat him.”
You called Mr. Kim’s lawyer the minute you sat down in your car. You told him what had happened.
“I’m sorry this happened to you.”
He said back.
“I’ll send all my notes to the man you’ll appoint.”
“Thank you for your help, Dr. Y/l/n.”
You said a small goodbye, before you hung up. While you were driving home you started to think about what happened today. You felt useless and it felt unfair. Why did you have to end up in all kinds of mess. First it was Jungkook, and now Mr. Kim.
Jungkook. You had completely forgot that you were supposed to meet him today. You sighed. Meeting him was the last thing you wanted to do. Maybe it was better to just say you forgot if he contacts you again. Since your session ended earlier than expected, you would actually have time to eat a proper meal and go to bed at a reasonable time. And with Mr. Kim’s case being transferred to someone else, you could finally use all your time on your normal patients. Even if the day had been horrible, you still had a massive weight lifted off your shoulders.
You walked up to your door, struggling with your keys to find the right one. Once you found it you put it in the keyhole and twisted, hearing the familiar click. You reached for the door handle and attempted to open it. But it didn’t budge. Did you not lock your door this morning? You twisted the key the other way again, and thought that it must be the exhaustion taking a toll on you.
When you finally were inside your own house you took off your coat and hung it up with your bag. You took off your shoes and looked at yourself in the big mirror you have in your hallway. You looked down at the white low cut top. It wasn’t even that low, but a part of your cleavage did show. In what felt like a fit of rage you took it off yourself. Hurriedly lifting it over your head and throwing it on the floor. You never wanted to wear that top again. You stormed over to the kitchen. You needed something to drink, you were so thirsty. So thirsty that you failed to notice the man sitting in your sofa. You swung the fridge door open, grabbing a carton of orange juice and downing what was left of it.
“Rough day?”
A voice emitted. You jumped and your heart started raising. You looked over at the sofa where the voice came from. Jungkook? Jungkook. You quickly ducked down behind the counter, remembering that you were only in your bra.
“What the fuck are you doing in my house?!”
You yelled at him. You wanted to cry, you wanted to scream, you were so confused. What was going on?
“Y/n, calm down! Please.”
You heard him get up from the sofa, taking hasty steps towards you. Your fight or flight instinct kicked in and you suddenly jumped up again and grabbed a knife. Pointing it towards him. He quickly halted, putting his hands slightly up in front of him.
“Come on, it’s just me.”
He said, leaning his head to the side.
“Exactly!”
You said, slowly moving away from him.
“Why are you here? How did you get in?”
You yelled at him, firmly holding the knife between the two of you.
“Baby, please calm down.”
“How can I calm down?! You broke into my house!”
He sighed, and went quiet for a moment.
“Put the knife down, you know I won’t do anything to you. Please, let’s just talk. That’s why I’m here.”
He said in a calm voice. You shook your head, you felt like you were going to have a panic attack. This was all too much for you. You threw the knife onto the kitchen counter and covered your eyes. You started crying. You were so overwhelmed. From the situation earlier today, to Jungkook suddenly appearing in your life again, to just the pure exhaustion. You needed to cry. You couldn’t hold it back anymore. You couldn’t put up the facade you usually do. And suddenly you felt two arms wrapping around you. He hugged you. And for a moment you leaned into it. You felt safe in his arms. It comforted you. It reminded you of when your father hugged you after your first boyfriend broke up with you. It was like knowing that someone cared for you when you felt as if the whole world was against you. Until you remembered who was hugging you. Because it definitely wasn’t your father. And the reality of you standing in just your bra with someone that broke into your house hit.
“Get off of me!”
You suddenly screamed, and started pushing his strong chest. Tears still streaming down your face.
“I hate you! I fucking hate you, Jungkook! My life has been a nightmare since the minute I met you!”
You screamed at him with all your lung capacity. Your throat got immediately sore.
“You’re fucking crazy! And I’m tired of playing your fucking games!”
He took several steps away from you, but you walked after him. Pointing your finger in his face.
“I don’t know what’s wrong with you?! How can you be so fucking awful?! You’re an awful person!”
He continued to stay silent through your fit of rage. Letting you ride it out.
“I hate you.”
You said, calming down but still crying.
“I hate you so much.”
You said taking a deep breath. You wiped your tears. He didn’t say anything. He just stood there. Speechless. You adverted your eyes to the floor.
“Please leave. Can you please leave me alone? Please, just-“
You started, continuing to wipe your tears. You had resulted to begging him to leave your life.
“I can’t do this anymore, Jungkook. I can’t.”
He grabbed your chin softly, raising your head up to meat his eyes. He was also crying. He silently kissed you. And you let him, too exhausted to do anything else. He pecked your lips, before walking away. He left you there, all alone in your kitchen. As you heard the door close behind him you fell down to the floor. Continuing to weep.
After a month of silence from your former patient you felt content. It had been a month, and there was no sign of him. Your life had gone back to normal again. It was definitely a good thing to tell him exactly what you meant. This time you had been harsh on him, to make him understand you were definitely not interested.
After three months you started thinking that maybe you had been too harsh on him. Maybe you should’ve eased him out of your life. Not gone all crazy on him. But he didn’t contact you, and you were definitely not going to contact him. So telling him that you were sorry was out of the question.
On the fourth month you thought that maybe it wouldn’t be so bad to contact him. Just to tell him you were sorry for being mean of course. He was really attached to you in his own weird way. Getting rejected by someone you had planned out your entire life with must be hard. What if he had gone back to his old ways? What if your rejection caused him to live in agony? To fall into depression?
On the fifth month you found yourself standing in the lobby of his hotel. If you were going to apologise, you were going to do it in person. That’s way more genuine rather than over a text. You definitely didn’t want to see him again, but anything for a real heartfelt apology!
“I’d like to see Mr. Jeon, is he here?”
You asked before the receptionist could say anything. He smiled at you.
“Is Mr. Jeon expecting you?”
He asked in a costumer support voice. You shook your head.
“No he isn’t.”
You answered short.
“I’m sorry, but I can’t give you access to his suite if he’s not expecting you.”
You rolled your eyes. You knew you had to lie.
“He’s not expecting me, but I’m his psychologist, ok? I need to talk with him, it’s important.”
You said in your serious voice. Shoving your business card in his face like you were a cop.
“I’m sorry-“
“You will be sorry if you don’t help me out here.”
You hit your palms onto the counter before you. The man slightly jumped at your action.
“Look, I’m not asking for the fucking key to his nightstand, I just want to know his room number for gods sake!”
You were starting to get annoyed at the poor man just trying to do his job. He looked quite frightened at your outburst. He thought for a second, before he nodded.
“717.”
He simply said. You thanked him and hurried over to the elevator. Once you reached his door you stopped yourself. Was this really the right thing to do? Maybe you should just leave, he wasn’t your concern anymore. Why weren’t you happy he was out of your life? Why? Why? Why?! The door suddenly opened, and you were sucked out of your thoughts. A man stood there, a familiar man, but not Jungkook.
“Hello, sweetheart.”
He said with a smirk on his face. He quickly pulled you into a hug. Letting his hands drop dangerously low on your waist. He took a deep inhale of your hair, letting out a small groan. It gave you instantly chills in all the wrong places. You tried pulling away from the incredibly awkward hug, but his grip on you was tight. He decided when the hug ended, but stayed close to you. Resting his hands on your hips.
“Let go of me! What are you doing here?”
You asked him and tried to get som distance from him, pushing at his chest. But his strong grip on your hips didn’t loosen.
“What are you doing here is the real question. A pretty woman like you shouldn’t be in a hotel like this.”
“Get off of me!”
He smirked and leaned in closer to you again. Whispering in your ear.
“Why don’t you come with me to my room? I still can’t get you off my mind, sweetheart.”
Someone cleared their throat loudly next to you. Taehyung reacted immediately. Jungkook. You looked at him, but he didn’t look at you. His eyes were focused on Taehyungs hands, planted on your hips.
“She said ‘get off’.”
He almost growled. Taehyung smiled, but removed his hands. Putting them defensively up in the air.
“Sorry, boss. Just had to catch up with my psychologist. She’s the girl I told you about.”
Taehyung started. You were in shock. They knew each other?
“I know.”
He answered and looked at you for the first time. There was a sort of a melancholy feeling in his eyes.
“You know it all, man. I’ll just-“
“Leave.”
Jungkook finished his sentence for him.
“Yeah, leave. I’ll leave. Nice seeing you again, y/n. We have to meet up sometime.”
“That won’t be necessary.”
You answered quickly, not taking your eyes off Jungkook.
“I won’t take no for an answer, baby.”
Taehyung said and stepped closer to you again.
“Yes you will, now leave.”
Jungkook said strictly.
“Okaaay, I’ll leave. Whatever.”
He said and walked away. You followed Taehyung with your eyes, watching as he disappeared into one of the rooms down the hall. When you looked back at Jungkook, you discovered he had been staring at you the entire time. You felt anger building up inside you.
“Don’t tell me this is what I think it is.”
You said, you almost sounded hurt.
“It’s not like that.”
He answered. You rolled your eyes at him. He didn’t exactly sound convincing. You had no intention of apologising to him anymore.
“Let me guess, you didn’t hire Mr. Kim to ruin my case so I could run back right into your arms? It was just a convenience that you were waiting for me when I came home, right?”
You asked in a sarcastic tone. He went quiet. You scoffed and turned to walk away. He grabbed your arm harshly so you couldn’t leave.
“I didn’t, I promise. Let me explain, please.
You sighed.
“Let me go.”
He shook his head.
“Y/n, just come-“
“Let me go.”
You interrupted him. After a few seconds he listened to you, and let go of your arm. You stood still, contemplating if you should leave for good this time. Instead, you slipped passed him into his room. His suite was huge, it was more like an apartment really. Modern with expensive furniture and paintings scattered around the room. He had a lot of money, you knew that, but you didn’t know it was to this extent.
“You better explain-“
You were suddenly caught off guard by his strong arms turning you around and embracing you in a tight hug.
“You came back to me! I knew you would! Oh, I’m so happy to see you again, baby!”
He said in a boyish tone. It was a sharp contrast to his interaction with Taehyung. You weren’t able to immediately react, getting lost in the feeling of his arms wrapped around you once again.
“Stop it, Jungkook. I’m still angry with you.”
You said and wiggled out of his hug. He looked at you with hurt in his eyes as he saw you brushing off imaginary dust from your skirt.
“I understand. Sit, I’ll get you something to drink.”
He said and walked out of the room. You did as you were told, sitting down on his white cashmere sofa. He came back with two cups of tea, placing them carefully on the glass table before sitting down beside you. You didn’t say anything, you waited for him to say the first word.
“Just uh- please just listen to me ok?”
He asked and looked at you. You nodded.
“I didn’t exactly plan this. Taehyung was stupid enough to get caught and ended up in prison. I told my lawyer to get you on his case. I knew a case like that would be amazing for your career.”
You shook your head disappointedly.
“I’ve told you I don’t want your help. Why-“
“Listen, y/n. Please just let me explain.”
You sighed and crossed your arms, but you stayed silent.
“Anyways, after a while he confessed to me that he was in love with you.”
You watched his entire body go stiff at his statement. He clenched his fists in jealousy.
“You know I’m willing to go lengths for you to succeed, baby. But- I had to stop him. I refuse to let him have you like that. Especially when we weren’t even talking to each other. So that night I sent you all those messages.”
He unclenched his hands and put his hand carefully on your knee.
“I knew he would do whatever I told him to, so I said if he got you out of the case I’d get him out of prison.”
“So you asked him to jerk off in front of me?”
Jungkooks face changed drastically. He did not seem pleased about the new piece of information you just gave him.
“He did that?”
He asked, his tone had changed from apologetic to dangerous. You nodded. His grip around your knee tightened. You put your hand over his, to show him that he was hurting you.
“I’m going to fucking kill him.”
He said looking you straight in the eye. Another set of chills ran down your back. You knew he meant it. It was not a loose threat.
“This isn’t about him, Jungkook. You pushed him do it. And then you broke into my house, expecting to be treated like some kind of hero.”
You pushed his hand off your knee. He started staring into the air. A million thoughts running through his head.
“I don’t understand how you can’t see that your behaviour is insane?”
You stated. He was still being quiet.
“You need to stop.”
You said a little calmer, trying to comfort him.
“I did.”
He said and looked at you.
“I did stop, because that’s what I thought you wanted. But now you were the one that came to me.”
He caught you off guard. It was your turn to be quiet this time.
“I’ll always do what’s best for you, because I love you, y/n. I don’t care how insane I sound or look to you. But why are you here if you think that of me?”
You looked away from him, knowing you had no rebuttal.
“You called me an awful person, you told me you hated me. And I can take it. But I can’t take another rejection from you! I just can’t!”
He raised his voice now. He was getting emotional.
“I’m sorry.”
You said so lightly it was almost a whisper. He stopped ranting and the room got quiet.
“That’s why I came here. To tell you that I’m sorry.”
You looked back to him again. His eyes were big and filled with so much love. You had never seen him like that before.
“I’m sorry I said I hated you, and that you’re crazy and an awful person. None of it true.”
He nodded slowly, not breaking eye contact with you. You became quiet again.
“Is that it?”
He asked carefully. You nodded, shifting awkwardly in the sofa.
“Yeah, I should probably leave.”
You said, taking his hint. Preparing to walk out and never seeing him again.
“No.”
He said, and shifted towards the end of the seat.
“No, not like that.”
He said in a hurry, and took ahold of you hands. You looked confused at him.
“I didn’t mean for you to leave. Don’t leave.”
He sounded almost desperate, clinging onto your hands. You nodded and gave him a short smile.
“What I meant to say is, is that the only reason you came here?”
You thought for a second. Was saying sorry the only reason you came? That’s at least what you told yourself. But at the same time you felt like you owed him more. You didn’t know what you felt. You had been an emotional wreck for months now.
“Yes.”
You answered. Trying to keep cool and not overthink the entire situation. You didn’t want to see him, you had to. Because you’re a good person. That’s all. That’s it. But it didn’t feel like it. It definitely didn’t feel like it. It felt like you longed to see him.
“You’re lying.”
You were ripped out of your thoughts by his statement. You shook your head defensively.
“No I’m not.”
“Yes you are.”
You opened your mouth to argue back, but he spoke first.
“If it was a clear ‘yes’ you wouldn’t have to think about it. I know you better than you think, y/n.”
He repositioned himself so he could look right at you.
“Come on, ask me anything about yourself and I’ll tell you.”
You looked briefly at your wristwatch.
“I don’t know, maybe I should leave.”
“Just give me a chance, y/n.”
He said.
“If I don’t get it right I’ll let you leave.”
You rolled your eyes playfully at him, but still turning more towards him, accepting his offer.
“What’s my mothers name?”
You asked. He gave you a knowing look.
“Come on, that’s easy. Give me something that isn’t on Google.”
You let out a small laugh.
“You didn’t say her name though.”
“Christina, now give me something good. Something deep.”
You smiled, but had to think for a second.
“When did I loose my virginity?”
His smile turned to a smirk.
“You were 16 at Mae’s birthday party. You were drinking, and her boyfriend August hit on you. He took you to her bed and fucked you right there. No wonder Mae isn’t your friend anymore. You’re a bitch.”
You couldn’t help but laugh at him. Deep down it was scary that he knew something so intimate in great detail, but for some reason you were having fun with his little game.
“Ok ok. But now it’s your turn, when did you loose your virginity?”
He let out a nervous laugh at your question.
“This quiz isn’t about me.”
He stated and pulled his hand through his hair. You tilted your head slightly downwards and looked at him through your lashes and with a pout.
“I think it’s only fair that I know your story, since you know mine so well.”
He smiled at you, but looked away for a few seconds. Contemplating if he should tell you or not. When you saw him shy away, you suddenly felt as if you were digging into something he wasn’t comfortable sharing.
“You don’t have to if you don’t want to.”
You said, and placed your hand on top of his. Your fun voice was toned down to your regular speech again.
“No, I’ll share it. No worries.”
He said and looked back to you. You nodded and turned completely towards him. Crossing your legs and resting your arm on the backrest of the sofa, ready to hear his story.
“My first time was around one and a half year ago, in your office, with the girl of my dreams.”
He said dead serious. You snickered at him, thinking he was joking. But he didn’t laugh.
“You can’t be serious.”
You stated, he nodded proudly.
“Why wouldn’t I be, like I said you’re my dream girl. Why would I waste my time on others when the only one I want is you?”
He asked rhetorically. You crossed your eyebrows in confusion.
“You’ve never had sex? Ever?”
You asked in shock. His image did not fit the virgin title whatsoever.
“Once. With you.”
You smiled, but shook your head in disbelief.
“You can’t be serious. You probably have girls throw themselves at you.”
His hand found your knee again. This time it was placed a little further up.
“The only one I want is you. I waited for you because I knew you would be worth it. Because I love you.”
He said in a low tone, slightly stroking the inside of your thigh. The two of you were close, so close that you were aware of the proximity. The tension in the air got thicker and thicker from the power of his last words. His face started moving slowly towards you, and you gave in. Meeting his lips. The kiss started slow, but he was quick to rush it. Grabbing your neck to deepen the kiss. You were suddenly overwhelmed by the reality of what you were doing, and pulled away.
“We can’t do this.”
You simply said. Focusing on your hands on your lap. His hand went to push a strand of your hair out of your face.
“Why?”
He didn’t sound angry or impatient. He sounded like he cared. It was so much different from the first time the two of you shared a moment like that. He had really changed, and that was the problem.
“I’m not your patient anymore, y/n. I don’t want anything from you.”
You looked up at him again, and he caressed your face in a loving matter.
“Except for you of course.”
His face got closer again, but this time you didn’t kiss him. You abruptly got up from the sofa, and opted for looking down at him instead. You took a deep breath.
“You’re not doing anything wrong by having sex with me. Again, I’m not your patient.”
He said a little bit louder, trying to calm you down.
“I can’t have sex with you because I’ll fall in love with you.”
You couldn’t believe those words came out of your mouth. You had been in denial this entire time, but you knew yourself. This would not end well. You couldn’t bare to fall in love with someone that would ruin your image and reputation. You just couldn’t. He looked at you like you were some kind of god. Like all his wishes were finally answered.
“Why is that a bad thing?”
He asked, you shook your head.
“I can’t let that happen, Jungkook. It’s going to ruin my career.”
You sat back down, leaning your elbows on your thighs and your head in your hands.
“I have done nothing but help your career. Why can’t you just trust me?”
He put his hand on your back, stroking you lightly. You looked at him again.
“Please, trust me y/n.”
Fuck it, you thought, before you caught him off guard with your forceful kiss. He was quick to get the memo, kissing you back with the same hastiness and lust. You found your way onto his lap without breaking the kiss. Once you were straddling him, you felt his already hard cock grinding against you. He was desperate for you. A muffled groan escaped his lips when your hand went down to remove his belt.
“Wait.”
He said as he pulled away from you. His cheeks were flushed and his lips were wet and plump.
“Let me taste you.”
It sounded more like a question than a statement. His whole aura was so different from the needy rough man you remembered from the last time.
“Please.”
You got off his lap, taking your top off slowly. Watching him as his face turned in awe of the sight of your tits. His eyes were only on you as you shimmied out of your skirt, letting it pool on the floor. You laid down on the sofa, spreading your legs for him. He quickly removed his shirt, before getting on his stomach. His hand ran slowly down your abdomen, before he reached your slit. He split your lips with the same hand, before he dove right into you. You could tell he was inexperienced, but the rapid use of tongue on your clit sent waves of pleasure throughout your body. You let out extra pound moans whenever he would hit a good spot, and luckily he was a quick learner.
Once he had the hang of it, his hand moved down to your vagina, pushing two fingers in. Your back arched at the speed of the overstimulation. Feeling your orgasm approach quicker than usual. You grabbed his hair, pushing him deeper into you, preparing for your release.
“Don’t stop, Jungkook! I’m close.”
He moaned by your words, the vibrations making you tip over the edge. Your legs closed in on him, locking him in place. As you rode out your high. Once you had calmed down, you let go of his hair. And his face popped up from between your legs. He climbed on top of you, kissing you passionately. You tasted yourself on his lips.
“God, you’re so fucking hot.”
He said in between kisses and moans.
“I almost came just from eating you out.”
He started fiddling with his belt, but you stopped him. Placing a hand on his chest carefully.
“Let me.”
You simply said, before he moved off you. He sat down again, and you crawled onto the floor. Seating yourself between his legs. You looked up at him as your hands slowly traveled up his thighs. He was even more flushed now, his hair sticking to his forehead. You could tell he was impatient. Flicking his eyes between your hands and your eyes.
“Please, y/n.”
He uttered with a heavy breath. You smirked up at him, finally reaching his belt. You took your time with it as well. Once it was open, he was quick to pull down his pants and underwear. Letting his cock spring free. You got on top of him again, slowly lowering yourself onto his cock. He jerked up the second he felt your pussy on him. His thick cock stretched your walls out, and a moan escaped both your lips.
“Just relax, I’ll take care of you this time.”
You said in a low voice, placing your hands on his shoulders. His hands went straight to your ass, giving your cheeks a tight squeeze. You kissed him gently before you started riding him. His head fell back in pleasure once you started your movements. Bouncing up and down his cock. His hands dug deeper into your skin. He filled you to the brim, and every bounce felt amazing.
“Fuck! I’m not- gonna last long.”
He moaned and looked back at you. You then leaned your hands backwards onto his thighs. Your head fell slightly back as you moaned at the new angle.
“Y/n, slow down!”
He moaned as his hands moved to your thighs. Trying halfheartedly to stop you. But you didn’t stop. And suddenly you felt him coming inside you. His hips lifted you up, as he released himself. And when you felt like he was finished you stopped. You rapped your hands around his shoulders as you fell onto his chest. The room got quiet, the only sound being your heavy breathing.
You weren’t able to think about the consequences of your actions at that point. You only felt satisfaction and lust. And maybe even love…
Thank you for reading! Do you want to read more?
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tastesousweet · 1 day
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⭒ the girl with the tattoo (x) - pt 1 pt 2 p3 p4 p5 p6 p7 p8 p9
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matt sturniolo x fem!oc / reader
summary : after three resentful weeks apart, only matt and y/n could find themselves more fond of each other.
warnings : angst, fluffy, mentions of alcohol and weed, sort of proofread
mickey speaks : THANK U FOR UR PATIENCE SWEET ANGELS HERE’S THE 10TH PART FOR YOU!!! tgwtt is already in double digits 🥹 only like 8 more parts to go
THIS IS PART TEN GO READ THE OTHERS FIRST PLEASE!!!
"COME on y/n we'll have so much fun!"
you haven't had a night out in weeks.
following matt's party, you swore off alcohol until your own birthday in mid-september, afraid of the amount you'd allow yourself to consume now that you're feelings are supremely hurt and bitterness coated your tongue.
it was difficult to turn down the first week, despite the smell and taste of any drink making your stomach turn you craved the drunken effect and secretly wanted to run into matt- just to see what he'd have the nerve to say to you. but the mature, wiser part of your brain knows there is nothing good to come from spiteful drinking. so you've declined every weekend.
you know in your heart that your friends only want you to feel good and have fun with them. it's the only reason you've tolerated this current conversation for so long.
"i believe you! but i'm just saying i'll have just as much fun with this bowl of strawberries and my bed," you reach into a cabinet for one of the many off-white glass bowls.
"baby you haven't been out with us in so long, we miss you!" remi beams kicking her legs as she sits atop your counter, fully dressed and decorated for her night out (contrasting the bare face, oversized tee, and panties you wear).
you sigh and look over to the three girls huddled in your kitchen, "no, you guys know 'm not drinking right now," you shake your head and push off of the counter heading towards the fridge in search of your berries.
"i'm just confused on why you're suddenly so strict on drinking? and regardless of the drinking you could have fun without it if you loosen up a bit..." erin replies while resting her body against the wall next to remi's spot.
you roll your eyes while your face is still in your fridge before shutting it back, "i don't understand what's not clicking erin, i don't want to go out at all! i want to stay at home and be away from drunk people and watch something brainless and then i wanna go take a fucking bath. i'm so tired of having to explain and repeat myself. please go, please have a good time, and please- respectfully, mind your business."
you run water over your strawberries and andrea's eyes widen as she turns back towards the counter to pour herself another shot.
"alright, whatever.” erin shakes her head, “dre, remi, i'm gonna go wait outside this is annoying. she can stay bitter," she walks out and whispers, "bitch," under her breath before shutting the door.
it's silent for a second as you begin to harshly cut the stems off of the fruit, remi comes behind you and wraps a caring arm over your shoulder for a hug, "are you okay?"
"yes, i'm fine, you can go have fun..." you turn to face her and offer a strawberry.
"i really do miss you,” you kisses your shoulder and bites into the strawberry, “love you," she reminds you as she grabs her bag and dismisses herself to check with erin. you nod your head and continue to stare blankly as you repeatedly cut.
andrea speaks up after hearing the door fully shut. she breathes heavily as she stares down at her hands on the counter, "cariña ("honey"), you’re not a bitch.”
“i know…” your voice is small.
“i know you do. i also know something’s hurting you badly right now and i selfishly wish you’d fucking tell me so i could help.” she licks her glossed lips, “but as long as you’re being kind to yourself, i can deal with you keeping this to yourself.”
your eyes brim with salty tears and when you let out a broken sniffle she's immediately by your side. "nooo don’t cry, i’m already pre-drunk! you know i will too!" you try to continue preparing your fruit but andrea turns your body to make room for a warm hug. you're quick to tuck your face into her perfumed neck and let out your feelings through cry's.
you had always thought that what andrea (or anyone) didn't know about your sex life with matt wouldn't kill her, but quite frankly it's killing you. you want to tell her everything he’s ever made you feel- for all andrea knows matt was once a silly crush and currently a little less than a friend to you.
but at the same time you just know she would tell you to stop seeing him if she knew everything. she would remind you that at your core you are far too caring and attached to handle recurring casual sex with him in the first place.
"i'm so sorry, drea. i really wanna tell you but i’m not ready." you croak pitifully.
not ready to accept the embarrassment of wanting him to like you this bad.
and for someone as willingly vulnerable as you, you’re especially not ready to hear her scold you a little for somehow hurting your own feelings and putting your friendship with erin on a thin line over some guy.
your words only confuse her brain more, but she can only continue to rub circles into your back and silently pray you didn’t do something illegal or, like, morally cruel.
౨ৎ
matt would love to say he hasn’t thought about you since you bitched out on him the night of his birthday, but he could never just blatantly lie.
he can say he has gone the past few weeks without reaching out to you- which mostly speaks to both of your stubbornness and pride.
in fact, you’re part of his reason for having his own night in tonight- though it’s far less sadistic of a reason than yours. he’s simply grown bored of the repetitive night life he and his friends have.
you were always there for him to tease and secretly fuck around with whenever your friend groups would combine for the night. but as of late he’s left sitting at the bar swigging down beers and scrolling on his phone (sometimes he’d get irrationally irritated at you for not posting on your instagram or snapchat stories, feeling a as if it was a direct punishment to remove him from knowing any details about your life) or until the rest of the group throw the towel in.
on the worst and most irritating of nights he’ll take an uber home by himself. and those were the nights he would get so close to being irrational- showing up to your house and confronting you was oh so enticing. but he’d talk himself out of it and go home to fuck his fist like you’d probably tell him to do.
and on the most horny and pathetic of nights he'd end up in the backseat of his car finger-fucking erin with her tongue in his mouth. it ended at that though, matt's skin started to crawl thinking of when you rode him in the front seat not too long ago. he had pinched his eyes shut and pulled erin's hands away from his zipper, swaying her with some sweet "i just wanted to make you feel good s’all" and a kiss before she left and he awkwardly drove himself home- pondering how little self control he had to be desperate enough to do even get that far.
so, he didn’t even bother to go out tonight. when chris and nick asked him through his closed door, he told them he’ll stay in for some “peace and quiet.” really, he just couldn’t stand to be disappointed by the guaranteed lack of you being there.
he sits in his desk chair, legs spread casually, and sketchbook held against his thigh as he scribbles around to formulate a few rough outlines for upcoming clients. somewhere in the mix he begins to sketch out a familiar cartoon cat, which only irritates him and makes him close the book abruptly, shoving it into his desk’s drawer.
matt rubs his hands over his face a few times and lifts himself from the chair, heading straight for his bedside table. he bites at his lips while digging through the drawer, eventually finding the pretty red hot blunt you rolled and gifted him.
he makes his way out to the patio, not bothering to turn the outdoor lights on; blunt, lighter, and phone in tow. he slouches into one of the many chairs near the glass door and places the blunt between his lips, shuffling as he digs in his back pocket for his lighter.
the spark of the bright flame highlights his focused face for only a few seconds while he pricks the end of the misshapen yet smoothly rolled blunt. he breathes in the smoke immediately, throwing the lighter onto a table nearby. he tilts his backwards to blow out swirls of smoke above him.
matt initially wants to wait to call you until he feels high enough, mostly to give him an excuse for calling in the first place because he knows you’ll be expecting one. but he can't fucking wait, he wants to know what you're doing right now.
matt continues to effortlessly inhale and exhale several hits as he searches his phone for your contact.
his thumb hovers over the dull button that would change a lot for him. calling you means looking like a dumbass, as if he can't handle not knowing you (apparently he can’t but he wouldn’t admit to it). calling you means he’s breaking this implied break up- for complete lack of better terms.
but who’s to say you’ll even answer and give him a chance to do any of that? and suddenly his phone is vibrating in his hand as he raises it to his ear.
it takes four rings for you to answer, though you're completely silent on the other end. he waits and you wait. he truly didn’t think this far ahead. you only give him a few extra seconds to be silent before you hang up all together.
matt kisses his teeth and redials. when you eventually answer again he speaks through the smoke in his lungs, "hi. why'd you hang up?"
"matt, don't call my phone and expect me to speak to you first." your voice has a bite to it that still surprises matt a little. it's so infrequent for you to be harsh or upset (as long as matt has known you, you've been nothing but cheerful and well… sunny) that it's oddly pleasant to see how you handle negative emotions- it reminds him that you’re not always good, something he’d always weirdly envied about you.
he releases more smoke in the air around him, "my bad, sweetheart."
"just tell me why you’re calling. are you drunk or ...?"
"no. i just wanted to know what you're doing."
you sigh heavily, "why does that concern you...?"
his eyes pinch as he stares out into the dark backyard, "why're you bein' so difficult? 'm just trying t-"
"matt. get there, please." you rush, though you secretly are enjoying hearing his voice and the romanticized idea that he must care a little if he’s reaching out again.
“yeah.” he takes a breath, “i don’t know. i’m just, like, here…by myself, and i wanted to remember what you sounded like.”
you smirk to yourself but drop it immediately, “okay…well, this is what i sound like.”
“yes, so soothing, i could fall asleep right here,” you can hear him audibly stretch.
“oh, i’m putting you to sleep?” you tease.
“yeah, i need you to come over and wake me up,” he inhales once more.
you’re silent and he breathes out again, “fuck was that too much- i’m sorry.”
“definitely. i need you to calm down, sir.”
“oh i’m so calm, baby,” he moans out playfully.
“matt, i’ll hang up-”
“woah! let’s not make such rash decisions?!”
“okay then.”
“thank you for answering,” his voice is muffled, “you could’ve blocked me- i talked to you so crazy that night and i do feel bad about, i want you to know.” he pauses and you silently process as he continues to compliment you, “you’re the only woman besides, like, my mother, who is just classy as fuck and way too kind to everyone whether they deserve it or not.”
you could never have expected to hear any words of admiration from matt in regards to you. “oh my god, are you near a couple of trees right now? how’d you get so sappy all of a sudden?”
matt takes a second to register your joke before his entire face crinkles and he shakes his head, giggling, “bad joke. such a bad joke.”
you let yourself laugh a little as well before pulling together, “thank you for apologizing, i honestly didn’t expect that from you.”
“well i don’t hand them out like that so i guess you’re lucky or something.”
“i guess i am…” you smile into your words a little.
“what have you been doing?”
“like the past few weeks or right now?”
“i was talking about right now but you can say both.”
“just was checking! i don’t want to talk to much, i know you’d hate to listen to it.”
“heyyy! really? throwin’ some shit i just told you i didn’t mean right in my face like that?”
“i’m sorry i had to!”
“you were holding on to that one, huh?”
“just a little.”
“okay, tell me everything and i’ll listen.”
“i know i made it seem like i’ve been doing a lot but i’ve honestly just been working a bunch. it’s not as much of a nightmare as it sounds though- working long shifts has helped me fall asleep quicker. i’ve also started cooking a lot more whenever im bored which andrea looooves. and… um, right now i’m taking a bath.”
matt’s eyes widen and he chuckles, “dammit! i knew i should’ve facetimed instead!”
you bite your lip to hold back a laugh yourself, “what are you doing, matt?”
“guess.”
“i mean, i know you’re smoking but you could be in a random bedroom at a party or like, at some other bitch’s house…i don’t know, i’m just guessing!”
“never that,” he laughs- which you can’t decipher as a sarcastic or genuine one -and explains further, “‘m at home, outside with that perfect little blunt you made.”
“oh, for real?”
“uh huh, she’s treating me real good.”
“i’m glad. can you finish telling me how you’ve been?”
“yeah, um-”
“mattttt!” a very drunk nick suddenly yells while sliding open the glass door.
matt literally jumps and is immediately annoyed, you can hear it in his voice despite it being muffled now, “dude, you scared the shit out of me! what do you need?”
“hello to you too, ugh, i forgot you’re all moody right now. what are you even doing it’s all dark and shit?” nick hangs on the door has he peeks outside.
matt gets up to close the door again, “mind your business, nick. move, you’re in the way.”
“hmm, you are so weird.” nick squints his eyes and turns away yelling chris’ name in a blood curdling scream (for absolutely no reason besides the fact that he thought it’d be funny to see chris drunkenly run into the living room).
“hey, you still there?”
“mhm, yes”
“nick and chris just got back from the bar so i’ll have to help them chill out, um, yeah. i wanna hang out again. not even just to fuck if you aren’t cool with that yet, if we can be friends around our friends we can be friends by ourselves.”
friends? you and matt? hm. “that’d be nice, do you wanna just come over like usual?”
“i mean i could but we can do whatever you want, seems like you’ve been home a lot so, you know.” his voice gets more distracted as he speaks
“okay, i’ll let you know. good night.”
“sounds good, sweetheart.”
౨ৎ
MATT - 6:30 PM
Are you done yet?
Y/N - 6:52 PM
yes i’m coming now
-
“i’m sorry again for keeping you so late y/n, you really didn’t have to stay and help me close!” your coworker, angela, beams as she follows you out of the back door with a trash bag.
“don’t worry about it,” you smile to her as you walk with her to the large dumpster on the side of the building.
she throws a bag the size of her torso into the bin with a mumble of ‘ew’ before turning to you, “don’t say that! i know you have that date thing tonight, i don’t want you to be late.”
“i told you it’s not a date! we’re hanging out as friends.”
she rolls her eyes while putting her travel sized hand sanitizer back into her purse, “y/n don’t start with that…it’s totally a date from what you’ve told me.”
you both continue to walk towards the back parking lot,“trust me, he’s made it clear he’s not that kind of guy.”
“then why waste your time?”
right when you go to defend yourself you hear a car door shut, drawing your attention to the man of the hour, who’s locking the doors of his sleek black suv as his jaw works a minty piece of gum.
his black tee exposes his tattoos and his jean shorts are held up with his favorite black belt. you can see his light eyes are squinted due to the sun’s undying brightness from where you stand.
angela turns to you with a full smirk and softly slaps your arm, whispering and giggling, “girl, he’s hot!”
“oh my god!” you have an uncontrollable smile as you look at her, “stop it!” you look over again and this time matt is leaning against his car, ready to catch your eye and send you a wave of his fingers with his eyebrows raised.
you wave back then turn away once more, “‘kay i should probably go but i’ll see you wednesday, right?” you lean in for a hug.
“yes i’ll be here,” she smiles into the embrace as you kiss into the air to the side of her head, “you’ll have to give me all the deets!”
“mhm,” you hum as you both part ways, “bye ang!”
you approach matt without any rush and he takes the time to gaze over your complexion (far more radiant than the last time he’d seen you) and the way your mini jean skirt compliments the blushed red top you’re wearing. “hi sunny,” he grins and reaches a hand out to bring you into a hug, only for you to set the handle of your small purse in it. he kisses his teeth playfully, “it’s still like that, huh?”
“like what?” you condescendingly look up at him.
“alright, girl,” he dismisses, “where are we goin?“
“it’s a surprise for a reason matt!”
“okay… then i’m assuming you’ll drive?”
“not exactly..” you spin on your heel and walk away from him as a hint to follow you.
he wraps an arm around your shoulder as the two of you walk down the busy sidewalk, he gives a couple of glances down at your phone while also navigating the two of you. “metro?” he reads aloud.
“mhm,” you reply and smile to yourself while adding the tickets to your apple wallet.
“wow, you really planned this shit out.”
“i’ve never half-assed something in my life,” you say as you both stop at a cross walk.
“never? you have a brother, right?” he asks and you nod, “i’m sure he’d be able to come up with something.”
“probably,” you shrug and grab his wrist when the walking sign lights. “we’re gonna make it just in time, the bus comes at 7:10.”
౨ৎ
the seating on the bus is comfortably squished; you sit in the window seat and matt next to you, moving his limbs inward to give room to those walking in the isle.
you reapply a faded shade of red, black cherry to your lips while using your phone camera. matt watches with his lips pursed in awe. “that shade looks nice on you,” he says softly.
you’re already feeling giddy internally and he’s forcing you to blow your unbothered cover at this point, “thank you,” you smile and turn to see him already close to your face, looking at your eyes then lips. you just have to close the space by giving him a small kiss, mumbling, “it looks good on you too, see,” you move your phone so that he can see his lips outlined with the stain of you.
he laughs and pouts his lips while checking himself out in your camera, making the risky move to take a photo of himself, before giving your cheek a kiss.
౨ৎ
“jesus, for forty fucking minutes you better have brought me to an all inclusive resort!” matt complains while dramatically stretching his back.
the sun was now peeking down and the flashing lights of santa monica pier were extra enticing. “stop, we’re gonna have so much fun! look!” you point at the energetic strip with a childish grin.
“alright, let’s go then,” he tilts his head towards the fair.
౨ৎ
“definitely could have gone without that last ride- wayyy too many dips,” matt holds his stomach dramatically.
“i could tell, you were screamin’ like crazy,” you smirk as the two of you stand in the line at one of the many food trucks. two hours into being there and you’ve rode almost all of the rides, it was expected for matt to ask to stop for some sort of food eventually.
“barely.” he rolls his eyes, “what do you want?”
“i’ll have a water and one of those bomb pops,” you tell him.
“that’s not really food, are you gonna be good with that for right now?” he clarifies.
“yes, matt. thank you,” you smile and matt waves you off as he approaches the tall window to order.
“hey, what’s up man? i’ll just have a water, one of those fourth of july a bomb pops, medium fry and a modelo in a can please,” he flashes a smile and pays quickly.
you thank him and the cashier as you take hold of the items you asked for. “can we go walk on the beach?” you ask him.
“yeah, it’ll be dark as shit, but yeah,” he responds lightly and shoves a few fries into his mouth.
౨ৎ
“when i was younger my mom would bring me and my brother to the pier every summer since i was seven maybe?” the waves crash softly in the background as matt lays between your legs, despite the scratchy denim of your skirt. “when i was eleven my brother would want to go off with his friends in high school and my mom wasn’t a fan of the rides, so she would bring me to walk on the beach with her instead.” you recall out loud after matt had asked what made you want to come here today.
“mmm, reminds me of east coast beaches when i was a kid. we’d make a whole day out of it and pack up my mom’s minivan.” you stretch his scalp hypnotically, “just being rowdy and annoying as hell on the ride there and sleeping on the way back. being a kid is, like, the best and we never realize it when we’re there.”
“isn’t it kind of sweet that we don’t? kids don’t even understand the concept of missing childhood or being nostalgic until they’re older. if eight year old me were constantly dwelling on what’s passed i know she’d go insane. i mean, even now, everyone is always chasing previous feelings and never fully in tune with the one present.” you look out at the waves that softly build up and crash repeatedly.
matt licks his lips and opens his eyes, sitting up from your lap, “holy shit, sunny,” he kisses you and pulls away to laugh, “you just made me sound like a dumbass.”
he keeps a hold of your face, “matt you’re not dumb, everyone is nostalgic for something,” you kiss him again to seal your words.
matt pulls away and you stands up and begin to remove your shirt leaving you in a lacy bra, “come on,” you tilt your head and matt immediately stands up to cover you.
“the fuck do you mean, ‘come on’?” he starts to laugh while looking around for anyone around.
you roll your eyes at his protection and unbutton your skirt, “take a dip with me.”
“no?! y/n, that water is freezing...”
you pull down your pants to reveal a small pair of matching lacy panties that matt can barely see in the dark but he just knows would send him over the edge.
“matttt,” you pout and bring his hands to your exposed ass, lifting his chin to capture his lips in your own, “please?” you look up at him.
he pinched his eyes shut, “baby, put your clothes back on…”
“alright be lame,” you take his hands off of you and run into the empty beach with a freeing laugh.
matt stands there, not wanting to yell and draw attention to you both, but also not wanting to freeze to death.
“matt! the water’s not even that cold, come here!” you exclaim, wading in the shallow water.
“no, i’ll just wait here until you’re done cooling off…”
“matt, please! what if i-” you pretend to fall backwards and start to fake a drowning scene that has him undressing to his boxers quickly.
he ignores the rush in his blood from the surprise of the water’s temperature in favor of getting you out of there. he calls your name over and over, the pitch black look of the ocean doing absolutely nothing to help.
he’s pretty freaked out when you come back up and jump on his back yelling, “you saved me! you saved me!” with a cackle.
matt immediately groans and slaps the water, “fuck you, why would you ever do some shit like that?!”
you giggle and he throws you off his back easily, turning around to be face to face with you as you wipe your eyes, “oh my god matt, my mascara’s gonna run!”
“maybe we should think of these things before running into the ocean?”
you stop wiping underneath your eyes to forcefully push him under the water, giggling at the sound of the crash and his “don’t-!” right before.
“no more,” he spits out water and scolds you when he comes back up, inching closer to you and holding you by your hips as you wrap your legs around his waist.
“okay,” you agree and go to kiss his wet face just as he quickly unhooks you and throws you back under.
“matt!” you squeal as you resurface to hear him laughing, “dude, i’m gonna kill you.”
“truce, truce, truce!” he repeats and backs away from you.
“yeah, you better run,” you threaten.
౨ৎ
“your eyelashes are like sooo long when they’re wet,” you compliment as you stare at matt under the moon’s light.
he pulls you closer him to stop his mouth from chattering due to the cold, “i’ll give you my lash routine,” he jokes.
“i realized something when we got off the phone the other day,” you bring up, as your eyes run over each of his facial features.
“tell me,” he rolls his icy lips into his mouth.
“i never said sorry for being nasty to you on your birthday.”
matt’s eyes squint, “it’s fine, i’m not hung up on that shit. we said we’re good, right?”
“yes, but-”
“alright then,” he shrugs and squeezes your ass in reassurance.
a smile graces your face and and you let your head fall to his shoulder, whispering, “matt…i’m cold now.”
“i’ve been waiting for you to say that, oh my god!”
౨ৎ
you both suffer as you put your clothes back on over your wet skin. you’re both chattering messes and simply cannot stop laughing about it as you make your way back to the boardwalk’s strip of raging bright lights.
you don’t get far before you’re begging matt to win you an oversized faux fur leopard print coat, “it’s just what i need, please!”
and he’s spent almost two twenties replaying this stupid game over and over again. you’re a pretty good cheerleader though.
“come on matt, you got it this time! no pressure! it’s only like i’m dying of hypothermia!” he deadpans as he looks over to you, “what?”
it was a simple game of ring toss- that was most definitely rigged, but besides you reminding him this and saying you didn’t need the coat that much, the stand runner’s comments doubting matt was enough to fuel him to continue playing until he wins.
and somehow he tosses the perfect ring, watching it land and swivel around the bottle in victory. you both outwardly celebrate with screams and a very public kiss, that the two of you just can’t stop sharing today.
“congratulations,” the employee boredly says.
“thank you sir, thank you.” matt then obnoxiously turns around and yells out a speech to the random passersby “i wanna thank my mother, my grandmother, brothers, dog, and you people for giving me this opportunity to win something so grand for my sweet sunshine!” you stop giggling to give a royal wave to the many people judging the two of you, “thank you santa monica!” he blows a kiss and you both spin around to claim your prize.
“you two are like cartoon characters,” the stand runner says. and as soon as you start to grin at him he corrects, “that wasn’t a compliment.”
“whatever man, just give the pretty girl the fucking coat,” matt blinks at him. as the man walks away to grab the fluff off of the rack a few people stop by the table and matt warns them, “if i were you i’d keep walkin’, this guy’s a first-class hater.”
you drag matt by his arm back over to you, “did you take your socially-overbearing pills today?!”
“i have no clue, i think im too cold for my brain to process embarrassment anymore.”
“here’s that coat,” the man hands you it with a shake of his head.
“thank you, sir!” you exclaim and immediately fit your arms from the sleeves, “this is everything i’ve ever wanted!” you say as your jaw goes slack.
“you look good,” matt agrees, “you also look warm, so now i’m jealous.”
“let’s go get you something warm, baby.”
౨ৎ
after a trip to a random gift shop for a hoodie, matt whined about needing real food so bad.
so the two of you stand at the hostess stand in a small mexican restaurant on the strip.
“for two?”
“yes, thank you.”
“i’m gonna go to the bathroom real quick, okay?” matt speaks close to your ear and you simply nod and watch him walk off.
you wait a few moments before the hostess offers to take you to your table, “did you want to go sit now or wait for your boyfriend?” she asks kindly.
you try not to make it so apparent that you enjoy the idea of you being matt’s girlfriend, “yeah, i can sit now, he’ll find me.”
౨ৎ
“i’ll have the chicken burrito please with extra rice,” matt orders as he sits across from you.
“and i’ll have the four birria tacos please,” you hand her the menu kindly.
you both are bundled up ridiculously with frizzy hair and barely-dry clothes, you’re surprised anyone agreed to serve you.
“alright, that should be out shortly!”
when she walks away matt asks, “why didn’t you get a drink? i’m just curious.”
“i swore off drinking until my birthday,” you shrug and fall back into the plush of the booth.
“mm, not smoking either?” he sips his water.
“i mean i haven’t smoked since early august but no i didn’t purposely stop.”
matt nods, “well if you were to drink, what are you ordering? i usually go for a corona but i wanna try something different.”
“oh strawberry margarita, a hundred percent. hits everytime.”
“i’ve never had a margarita so i’ll try it.”
your jaw drops, “hell yeah you’re gonna try it, i can’t believe you!”
“what can i say?” matt shrugs.
౨ৎ
matt plays with the toothpick in his mouth as you both sit in your spots for the bus ride home. he got to enjoy his first margarita and you took multiple pictures to document it, he bought you churros to go, and now you both are the most tired you’ve been in a while.
you quietly respond to texts that andrea sent you hours ago, asking what you’re doing and if you’ll be home soon, while matt lays his head on your shoulder sleepily.
eventually you shut your phone off and calmly rest your head against the chilled window for the rest of the ride.
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themultifandomgal · 2 months
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Jay Halstead- All My Fault
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Trigger warnings- hospital, passing out, blood clot on the brain, near death
4 hours, just 4 hours left of my 12 hour shift left. I can do this.
For the last few days I’ve felt like I’m catching the flu but when I woke up this morning I felt so much worse and it’s only getting worse as the day goes by. If this was the start of my shift I would have gone home, but I’m so close to being done and then I have 4 days off to recover. So I’m going to power through the last hours.
“Feeling any better?” I hear my husbands voice. I look up at squint at the brightness off the lights, but I notice Jay looking down at me
“No”
“Why don’t you head home? We’re just doing paperwork” I glare at my partner, Adam
“Don’t jinx it” I groan making Jay chuckle
“In all serious babe I’ll take you home”
“No I’ll be fine” I give Jay a weak smile then return back to my paper work
“At least take some painkillers”
“Fine” I slowly stand up, but Jay places his hand on my shoulder and pushes me back down in my seat
“I’ll get them. You stay put” I give Jay a thankful smile. I look at my computer, but have to blink a few times as my vision blurs, probably due to this migraine that I’m having.
“How long has this migraine been bothering you?” Erin asks concerned
“Have had it a couple days now, just today it seems to be worse”
“Here” Jay comes back with some painkillers, a water bottle and a cereal bar “try and drink all of that and eat this. Might help. If your still not well tomorrow I’ll call Will to come over” I roll my eyes at Jay, but instantly regret it as the pain behind my eyes feels like I’m being stabbed. I take the pills and drink half the bottle then open up the cereal bar.
Finally my shift ends, Jay has another couple of hours, so Adam drops me off home
“You sure your going to be alright?”
“Yeah. I’m just going to have a bath try and eat some toast then head off to bed”
“Ok, but if you get worse please ring me and I’ll come over until Jay gets home”
“Thanks. See you” I wave goodbye and close the passenger side door, get my keys out of my bag and unlock my door. I give Adam one last wave and close the door behind me. Sighing I drop my bag on the floor, take my shoes off and head upstairs into the bathroom. Turning the tap on the blurry vision returns and I stumble backwards feeling dizzy. The last thing I remember is the way my head feels like it’s going to explode.
Jays POV
I return home expecting to see YN in bed asleep, or at least trying to. Heading upstairs I notice the bathroom light on and can hear the water running in the bathroom
“I’m home” I call out but don’t get a response. That’s when I notice the floor is wet. Panicking I open up the door and see my wife on the floor unconscious “YN? YN baby can you hear me?” Not getting a response I immediately take my phone out of my pocket and dial 911
“911 what’s your emergency”
“I need an ambulance at ‘address’ my wife is unconscious”
“How long has she been unconscious for sir?”
“I- I don’t know. I just got home. She’s been home for 3 hours on her own”
“Ok can you check her breathing for me?” I lean down and see if she’s breathing, thankfully yes
“Yes” I breath out
“Ok I have sent an ambulance to you, they should be with you in 5 minutes, keep checking her pulse and breathing until paramedics arrive”
5 minutes go by and they feel like the longest 5 minutes ever. Brett and Dawson arrive, I feel slightly relieved that the paramedics on shift right now are these two as I trust them the most with my wife
“Jay we’ve got her” Gabby says after I lift her onto the stretcher
“Can I ride with you?”
“Sure”
“What the hell happened?” Boden, YNs dad shouts walking over to me sat in the waiting room
“I don’t know. I just came home and.. fuck she looked…” I rub my hand over my tear stained face
“Does will know?”
“Yeah. He’s gone to see if he can find out what’s going on. Fuck I should have brought her here earlier, she wasn’t feeling good when she was at work”
“Jay, Wallace” I look up and see Will walking over to us nervously “I’ve spoken Abrams, she’s in surgery right now”
“What? Why? What’s wrong with my daughter?”
“YN had a blood clot on the brain. Has she hit her head recently?” both will and Wallace look at me. I think back to the other day, before her headache started
“Fuck this is all my fault. She hit her head on a job, she told me she was fine and I looked at her head, there was no bump so I didn’t….. fuck I should have forced her to….” I choke on my own words. This is all my fault.
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