I've been working on this off and on for a bit, if I work on it anymore I'll ruin it

Make bathing on your period FUN! Fill yourself up with water and shoot the now bloody water out like a SQUID

1/2/23

1/4/23

becoming evil im getting period symptoms even though i’ve been on t for almost a year and a half and hadn’t gotten one since i went on it up until last month where i was spotting a little and now i’ve got the symptoms again im gonna actually turn into the joke if i shed even one molecule of uterine lining

There was an ask about this but in regards to those cuntboy porn weirdos, I think you can almost always tell if they've got a fetish for turning cis male characters into transmen and giving them pussies just so they can get fucked cause they NEVER account for bottom growth Tdicks, it's like an indicator light

You might be onto something there. Like obv some trans guys don’t have a lot of bottom growth but you really gotta raise an eyebrow when someone only ever makes characters trans guys to have them be basically cis guys with pussies to make them bottom.

And obviously I also get that there are a lot of trans guys who bottom and that’s absolutely not the issue here. And neither is trans guys making cis guy characters trans to project or whatever because I don’t really care much about that either. It’s more that they treat trans people fucking weird and don’t seem to understand that a trans guys junk actually isn’t identical to a cis woman’s, even pre op/non op. T does inevitably change some things down there, and those differences can and are more obvious while aroused.

It’s just red flags all over and idk how really to explain exactly how except for how it really doesn’t seem to treat trans men with very much respect, even for wank material. Mostly because of the lack of honesty. If you have a fetish, just own that and leave your weird politics or whatever at the door and get off like a normal freak.

Every time I think about the night I figured it all out I sort of get startled that yes, I am a trans girl. It's not hypothetical, or a future thing. I am a girl, now. Every time I acknowledge that fact I get a little anxious and sad. Like, I get angry at the oppression, and the news, and the misgendering, but I don't get the good bits. I don't get to be pretty or cute or dress nice. I'm just bitter and a little depressed. This is my lot in life for the time being. Woo.

HOWEVER I won't say I'm entirely ungrateful because I had to use a porta potty earlier and I almost fucking thanked God that I had a dick so I didn't have to sit on that nasty ass seat.

TW

being trans is so ridiculously exhausting. you can never escape it. It's always with you. there are only 3 escapes: drugs, sleep, and death. especially when you're a teenager. i know that weed and nic will eventually kill me but atp who even cares. no matter what i do or how i try to live my life i will ALWAYS be transgender. there's literally nothing i can ever do to ever escape it. it's just a fact. and i don't know how long i can deal with it as my reality. it's such a hopeless existence, and i can't do it forever.

7 for the ask game

there is only one that comes to mind .

when i was like 12 i was in my schools theater program and i was in the school musical as a member of the chorus. i was one of the bitches dancing in the background yknow

one night that we were performing the lord decided to show me his greatest wrath and unbeknownst to my young self i would have to bear the weight of eves original sin. if memory serves, my costume was a yellow button down with neon orange pants. blood clashed against it almost as if it were snow. it had to have been visible even to those in seated furthest away.

i had no idea until after the show had ended. none of those sick sons of bitches had said a word to me about it. my pain was my own

"As my friend Julian puts it, only half winkingly: "God blessed me by making me transsexual for the same reason God made wheat but not bread and fruit but not wine, so that humanity might share in the act of creation."

– Daniel Mallory Ortberg, Something That May Shock and Discredit You

I want to be a pretty butch.

I want to wear nice well-fitting clothes and have my hair done up neat and wear a nice cologne.

I want to have a pretty girl claim me as her pretty butch, and walk me around with a big proud smile on their face. Like a well groomed show dog at the kennel club. And when she takes me home, in the softest domme voice, calls me her "pretty boy".

I am SO fucking glad that tumblr at large has moved on from the 'drawing trans characters with visibly trans features is fetishizing/transphobic/etc' mindset. The 'Umm why did you draw a trans guy who DOESN'T look like a cis bodybuilder (except with perhaps the daintiest top surgery scars perfectly lining their sculpted pecs)? What if you give someone dysphoria?' era was such a nightmare

Here’s a daily reminder that if you experience severe pain, cramping, heavy bleeding or clotting that is not normal and you should seek out the advice of a doctor.

REPEAT AFTER ME:

GETTING UNCOMFORTABLE FROM SOMEONE SIMPLY EXISTING AS THEMSELVES IS YOUR PROBLEM, NOT THEIRS.

IT DOESNT AUTOMATICALLY MEAN YOU ARE WRONG TO FEEL THE WAY YOU DO.

BUT IT DOESNT MEAN THEY HAVE TO CHANGE TO CONFORM TO YOUR COMFORT, OR THAT THEYRE DOING SOMETHING WRONG.

IT SIMPLY MEANS ITS SOMETHING FOR YOU TO WORK THROUGH, NOT FORCE ONTO OTHERS TO CHANGE WHO THEY ARE INNATELY.