Every year I am reminded why I absolutely despise Thanksgiving

Madam Qin fearing for herself is absolutely not a moral failing, but I feel like the other thing that meta basically dismisses is how extremely traumatic talking about rape often is for victims even when they don't have to fear being killed for it. Madam Qin is described as having been extremely depressed for years, even though she was still very close with her daughter. It was extremely difficult for her to say anything, and when the wedding announcement came through she fainted dead away on the spot and then died right after the wedding. That meta describing her as "giving up" and just not being bothered to do more to save her daughter put a really nasty taste in my mouth.

Yes, yes, absolutely this. The fact that she didn't speak to anyone until the betrothal fucks me up so bad. Like, she spent the better part of 20 years (or more) carrying that trauma all by herself, and all the while she probably has to interact with her rapist on a semi-regular basis because her husband is still friends with him and Laoling is beholden to Lanling Jin politically even before JGS becomes Chief Cultivator. She probably has to attend events at Jinlintai. She probably has to host him at her house. And the more time goes by, the less likely it is that anyone will believe her, so even if she were able to speak about it, what incentive would there be to do so, short of a crisis like the one she tries to prevent? God.

(Sometimes I sit there and contemplate: what if they really weren't half-siblings? The timing of QS's birth is such that nobody takes anything amiss. What if she really was QCY's daughter, but Madam Qin assumed the worst and was never able to find out for sure because if she never felt safe enough to talk about her rape, she sure as hell wouldn't feel safe enough to seek out confirmation of her fears? Or, on the other side of things, given how heavily JGY favors his mother, what if MS miscounted and JGY was never JGS's son after all? What if all of that was based on a worst-case scenario that hadn't actually transpired? The whole thing is wretched but that would manage to make it worse, I think.)