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#1. she's an alien rock creature
doobler · 2 years
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Steven Universe discourse still cracks me up like
Y'all got a show made by people who clearly love doing their job with explicit LGBT+ rep including non-binary rep and a majority female cast with a variety of body types and with multiple women POC voice actors regarding topics like mindfulness meditation, forgiveness, trauma, PTSD, establishing boundaries within relationships, compassion, with an overall message of forgiveness
And yet y'all seemed to wish for the series' demise at every moment and complained about the most insignificant details like that the storyboard artists had slightly inconsistent art styles
The messages and characters are so complex and compelling and the show gets you to think about difficult concepts and topics which flew over people's heads completely
People still think Steven should've idk wiped out the Diamonds? In the show where the whole message is that people are complicated representations of their experiences and trauma and people deserve second chances?
Idk I feel like a lot of "fans" who start discourse don't actually like the show, otherwise they'd actually absorb the basic premise of it
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derfpossessions · 6 months
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Rented You Out - Part 3
I’m back after months! Note that for this part it’s gonna be a little different just for the sake of the halloween spirit! (tw a little bit of horror and gore) 🎃
Read Parts 1 and 2 if you haven’t already! 
_________
The High School is throwing a huge halloween party, and Denholm, Markus and Paula went to buy costumes at PartyCity.
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“Do I look good babe?” Denholm asked his girlfriend.
“Of course! Now let’s go out and eat?” The three headed to the nearby fast food.
As they were riding in the car, a little boy was seen wearing a halloween costume, and approached the three.
“Trick or treat??” asked the kid.
“I think it’s too early for that honey.” said by Markus.
“Trick or treat??” the kid said again with his pupils getting more enlarged.
“Denholm I think we should leave.” Paula said while she started to get nervous. The kid started shaking a little bit.
Chapter 2
The night comes as Markus went home and left Paula and Denholm. It was 3 hours before the halloween party.
“I’ll see you two later at the party okay? The house is gonna be filled with shit!” Markus said as he started heading home.
“So babe, now that he’s out of the way, why don’t you and I have a little bit of fun tonight?” Paula said in a flirting manner.
“Baby, I’m kinda tired, let’s just call it a day shall we?” Denholm was panting.
She then started pushing him to the bed. And there the magic started happening.
“YESSS!! HARDER!!” Paula screamed as the bed started to rocked like there’s an earthquake in LA. 
Loads of milk were splashing everywhere, Paula even swallowed some of them. 
Paula was screeching in pleasure as Denholm pounded her hard. She bounced up and down as Denholm’s glorified manhood strobed her. 
“Babe, we gotta go clean after this. I don’t wanna go to the party smelling like cum.” Denholm jokingly said.
As the two were having fun, a shadow was seen running across the halls. 
“What was that?” Denholm was startled.
“I don’t know. It sounded like a cat or something. I’m going to go check.” Paula put on her clothes.
The two smiled at each other as she opens the door wide. 
“And put a goddamn shirt on before you leave the room!” Paula giggled as she throw the shirt to Denholm while he was turned around.
But unluckily for Denholm, the shirt had hit the button used to turn him into a bodysuit.
He started getting dizzy and nauseous and he noticed his feet were deflating. He started panicking.
“Babe… Babe!” Denholm started screaming but she couldn’t hear him.
Suddenly a weird figure appeared in front of him. It was the kid. But it wasn’t.
“Help.. help me!” Denholm said to the kid. But we has just standing there shaking.
The kid started turning into something else, into a full alien. Whatever creature that was, it was definitely NOT human. The creature then shut the door.
“What… what?!! Stand back!” Denholm panicked but couldn’t move because his legs have fully deflated.
The alien started coming closer. It made its way to his bed and started grabbing his rubber legs.
Denholm gasped for air. His chest was also deflating slowly as he watched the alien grab him like clothes.
He let out one last scream and grunt before all that’s left was his head. The alien then started opening the zipper from his spine.
The suit stretched down as the alien’s sharp legs pierced inside Denholm’s legs. He witnessed it all happen before he completely blacked out. The alien’s skinny taller body molded into Denholm, and he saw him standing a little more taller. As he blinked his last sight, his head collapsed on his new ribcage-y chest. The process was almost complete.
The alien magically started molding into the insides of Denholm, reverting back to his normal shape. All’s that left was to put on the head.
The alien’s head was too large to fit into Denholm’s, so it had to stretched the zipper into him. 
Denholm’s face puffed out to the point that his eyes opened wide and his mouth jaw dropped. As the process was coming to an end, a new Denholm opens his eyes, and zips the zipper shut.
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The new Denholm started clenching his jaw, and he started breathing hard as he learned the basics of living as a human.
He started touching his chest, and pulled out Denholm’s phone to take a quick picture.
“I… I did it. I am… I am him.” He said in a very low monotone voice.
Then Paula suddenly opened the door to see Denholm still naked.
“Babe! Didn’t I told you to get up like 10 minutes ago?! Come on we’re gonna be late for the party!” Paula said.
“Babe… babe. Ok. babe.” Denholm said as he stares blankly into Paula.
“Hahahaha very funny! Maybe you should put that into character when we’re actually IN the party! Now come on! You gotta clean off those cum stains in the fucking bed!” Paula was disgusted.
Denholm rubbed his face and touched his cock and he stared at the mirror again. 
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“Trick or treat… Denholm.” He started grinning.
While taking a shower at the bathroom, he slowly unleashed his fresh new alien loads . 
Chapter 3
“Why isn’t this man not answering?!?” Markus got pissed as Denholm wasn’t answering his calls.
Suddenly Denholm’s car arrives. He is wearing the pirate outfit from PartyCity.
“Oh finally guess who showed up?” Markus said.
Denholm just stared at him blank for a good 4 seconds. Then he just ignored him and walked by.
“Paula did you gave him crack or something cuz im gonna crack your ass if you did!” Markus got annoyed but was laughing.
“Shut up! I would never do such a thing!” Paula jokingly said. 
The three then went in and had fun. 
The dancing got louder, and Paula and Denholm were in the middle of the dancefloor. Everyone loved him that night.
“Nice pirate costume G” said by one of Denholm’s varsity boys. The drunk guy then pat him hard in the back, hard enough to flip the switch… off.
Denholm collapsed to the ground and then started having seizures, he was turning BACK into human form. One rule that you should take note of is that a person should NEVER turn off the bodysuit mode while someone is inside the suit. It will be very painful. or worse.
Paula held her boyfriend tight as he started gasping for air. Time was running out for Denholm, and for the alien inhabiting him. Markus witnessed everything that happened. He wasn’t shocked about the fact that Denholm started spitting out green slime on the ground, it was the fact that the switch was turned ON the whole time. 
“Wait… so that means… FUCK.” Markus was in shock. “Someone must have used the bodysuit!” He didn’t know what to do. Him and Denholm came up with an agreement that Denholm would never turn into suit mode without Markus’ approval. He ran up to him and notice Denholm’s eyes. There was something weird about those eyes… something glowing inside.
Denholm then grabbed by the neck and started choking Markus. Everyone started panicking. Music was stopped, people were running away. Markus looked into Denholm’s eyes. It somehow made him feel pleasurable in a way. One of the boys then grabbed Denholm away from Markus, letting go of him. Panting, Denholm freed himself from the men’s arms and ran towards the dark hallway.
Markus followed forth, and saw Denholm finally collapse as his back unzips, revealing the horrific creature that was using his body.
“Trick or treat..” the alien murmured.
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“Hold on.. I recognize that voice.” Markus realized that the alien was the kid that was asking for candy back at the drive thru. 
“Stay. away.” Markus threatened the alien. The alien then started crawling towards him.
“I know you love me but I love someone else…” The alien mimicked Denholm’s voice before collapsing and turning into a pile of dried powdered cement.
Markus almost went into tears. The alien might not have hurt him physically, but it managing to dig in through Denholm’s memories and say that felt like him getting stabbed a thousand times.
He then tried waking Denholm up, whose body is in a room. He was not waking up. And there wasn’t any assurance of when he will wake up. Since Markus didn’t know how long that alien has been using Denholm’s body, he’s not sure if Denholm is not yet fully awakened to be able to return. He then heard Paula and the others running up to the room.
“Babe?! Babe! Are you alright??!? What the fuck happened?!?” Paula was on the verge of tears.
Denholm then said, “I’m alright… I was just feeling so high earlier.. must have been the drinks or someone must have laced me..” 
“Ok stay right where you are, I’m going to go  get an uber to drive us home.” Paula runs out of the door.
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Denholm then closes the door and changes his clothes. He let out a big sigh and looked in the mirror. “Sorry I had to do this to you again, Denholm.”
TO BE CONTINUED
(Sorry if this one’s a bit rushed, I’ve been busy lately so I didn’t really had that much time. Stay tuned for more!)
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ourrechte-blog · 1 year
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Part 1 of Flood of Ares
This is part of the Funny Take on Daddy Danny and DC series, or Danny Who since he’s teenage American Doctor Who. I’ll go back to that one at times and on this segment of the series at other times. It depends on my muse
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"So, dad," the little clone said in a teasing tone, "where are we right now?" "It's a surprise," came Danny's reply. He himself had no idea where Clockwork took them, but decided to trust in the time ghost pretending to be a machine. For fun. Whatever that's about Wherever they were dropped, it certainly looked nice. If a bit odd. Rocks as far as the eye could see, yet nature was just as bountiful. Truly a paradox of life, much like him and his clone/daughter As the little girl gazed around in wonder, Danny heard a slight rustling sound and pulled out a fake ecto pistol. Sure it had no working mechanisms, but it did hide his index finger so he can fire in human form Dani jumped in surprise before she was ushered behind Danny "Come on out!" he ordered. Sure, it could just be a hiker, but it could be a GIW agent for all he knew. After being exposed as a time traveler, any moment in the future could have an agent out to use him for another scheme to destroy the Ghost Zone Danny then felt a spike of pain through his brain and fell to a knee, clutching his head with his free arm "Dad!" Dani yelped in surprise, quickly grabbing Danny's arm and aiming it at an alien creature holding its arms up in surrender. It was humanoid, with unclothed green skin, its head ending in a sharp spike at the back, its red eyes gazing apologetically at them "I am sorry!" it spoke in a high pitched voice, "I did not understand your language so reading your mind was the fastest way to learn to communicate" Danny relaxed his posture now that the pain subsided. He knew this race was peaceful, so he's in no danger as long as he didn't attack them first Dani, seeing Danny relaxed, mimicked him. He seemed to trust whatever the creature was, so she'll defer to him "I'm Danny," he introduced himself to the creature, holding out a hand. The creature's eyes glowed, causing Danny to flinch slightly, before it too extended a hand out in greeting. "I am Rae," came the reply before turning to Dani. "I'm Danielle, but call me Dani," the clone introduced herself with a rather shy wave
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thewertsearch · 1 year
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Asks Comp 1/5
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We don't even need to speculate about Vriska's hidden motives - even her stated motivation is dangerous.
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As I said before, we know exactly how she 'helps' people.
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Thank you! It's good to be back.
Act 5.2 has been fun so far. I didn't realize how much I missed the kids until we got back to their PoVs.
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Homestuck could have opened on Rose, watching her mother drink herself into a stupor - or Vriska, tossing a corpse into her spider's pit. These events are canonical, but bringing them into sharper focus would turn the story into something very different.
That Homestuck chose to start with John tells us a lot about its identity. It's a dark story, in a lot of ways - but there are much darker stories, two steps to the left.
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Sburb Any% in 23:59:59 (Green Sun skip)
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Haha, that's fair, actually. Although you're probably not chastising them for failing to understand the time loops you're both navigating.
(If you are, though, you have the coolest job imaginable. Are you hiring?)
@gravity-rocks asked: Ooo, saw the person who asked you about your thoughts on lusii and troll evolution and thought I would pitch in with my little theory. I like to believe instead of lusii being the parasites, maybe TROLLS evolved as brood parasites. All these lusii seem to have consistent blood colors, and the blood colors always match the troll theyre a guardian of. I know we havent seen baby lusii, but maybe before they become "white" their babies are a bright color, and the bright blood colors of the trolls evolved as a way to trick the lusii into caring for them. Now, not all animals actually care for their young, so it's not a perfect strategy, so some creatures taking 'advantage' of this parasitism couldve evolved side by side, which I find super interesting. And with troll genetics and slurries, that made me wonder if troll genomes are particularly unstable and able to incorporate all sorts of other dna into it, like some bacteria - perhaps lending to this ‘infiltration’ power. The troll powers and mutations relating to their lusii is really really interesting, I mean we saw sollux’s ogre lusus with similar powers. I wonder if that sort of matching dna in subtle ways influences which trolls are adopted by which lusus. Alternatively an even more interesting explanation. Trolls grow their powers over time with their lusus and incorporate more of their dna over their lifetime with them. With huge wiggled populations, the way the genetics slurry with each other, and ease of mutation, perhaps it explains how intense their anti mutant and culling sentiments are, and why they might have evolved to be as extreme as they are.
This is some great speculative biology - I particularly like the idea that trolls are highly prone to mutation, like an alien Eevee.
It is interesting that Sollux shares his eye-beams with his Biclops. Their powers are identical, so there has to be some casual relationship between the two - we just don't know what direction it's in.
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Aw, Kanaya. Neither of you is the Stupid Girl - it just feels that way when you have a crush!
I started shipping these two because they're my favorite characters - but I'm continuing to ship them because their relationship is cute as all hell.
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For sure! The added context of Hivebent really adds a lot of texture to the plot. The playing field feels wider, and the stakes are much higher.
@manorinthewoods asked: What are your favorite songs from Homestuck? [ they listed their own faves but some are technically spoilers, will send them later! - C] . ~LOSS (25/4/23)
My current favorites are Descend, Dissention, Sburban Jungle, Upward Movement, and The Beginning Of Something Really Excellent!
Another album review is well past due, but Homestuck Volume 5 is longer than the first four combined, so I'll need to set a day aside to really take it in.
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I never got an ask about this, so send away!
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Zathura! Damn, it's been a while since I've thought about that movie.
I love the idea that every 'real' game in fiction is actually taking place in an infinite sea of monsters.
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That's true, I guess, and you do need to get there to fight the final boss - but Sollux proved that you can freely fly between planets, if you have the means. The houses seem kind of redundant, if that's their only purpose, but I don't think it is.
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Act 4, I think! Hivebent's troll worldbuilding is great - but Act 4 focused a lot more on Sburb's game mechanics, and that's still my favorite part of the comic.
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We don't yet know the circumstances of his Exiling, but he probably needed to lose, to be Exiled the way he did.
As for why he needed to be Exiled the way he did... well, we've already talked about how weird and arbitrary these loops are. In the end, WV's army was just a casualty of causality - and messing around with causality is beyond the scope of the game.
Not impossible, necessarily - just beyond the scope of the game. Rose knows what I'm talking about.
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It's either that, or the meteor's seed was what fell into the portal, and it grew to full size after it left the Medium. Either works.
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It's impossible for me to choose - but I'll default to Descend. It was a great bookend to pre-Hivebent Homestuck.
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Thanks for the list of names - and congratulations on your evolution to full blog status!
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That's all true - and I never considered that Karkat would be jealous of John's social circle. Things are just easier for him - his friends all get along, and he doesn't need to needle them into working together. From Karkat's perspective, John barely has to do anything as a leader, while Karkat worked his ass off and still failed. Damn.
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[ this post! ]
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Hahaha, damn. I forgot about those early predictions.
I was right about the terraforming, I just wasn't thinking big enough. In retrospect, it's pretty funny that I only gave it a 1% probability - for all the help they were, I may as well have pulled those numbers out of thin air.
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John's the kismesissitude mascot, after all!
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Earth's a big place, so there could easily be thousands of unseen temples - but I'm starting to doubt they'll ever get any focus.
I've slowly begun to accept that Earth's other sessions might just be out of scope for this story. That's for the fanfiction authors - and, maybe, for 'semi-canon' spin-offs.
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Yep, this chicken/egg stuff is so common for Sburb that it's practically routine by now. It's simply not possible to say whether Titles cause personalities, or vice-versa - both were 'simultaneously' encoded into the Alpha Timeline. The point is moot.
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Yeah, quadrants really haven't shaken out the way the original infodump implied they would.
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Karkat's Dark Crush on John doesn't seem nearly as toxic as whatever's going on with Jack and the Queen.
Is Karkat wrong about his feelings? Do Carapacians experience kismesissitude differently? Has Hussie quietly retconned some of Hivebent's quadrant stuff?
At this point, who knows. Alternia's original view of quadrants might not even matter - it's gone, and the surviving trolls are free to do their own thing.
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aurora-daily · 8 months
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Maybe this is a silly question to ask, and I know the people who run this blog are very busy, but I was wondering what your thoughts were!
Aurora has said each album she plans on making is going to be different from the things she's made before. It SEEMS like she's getting ready for her next evolution!! Different styles of clothes worn in shows. New merch drop with the weirdos and warriors! Do you have any thoughts on where we may be headed? Any theories or things you hope happen?
Thank you guys so much for all the hard work you do keeping us up to date here. Love you!!
Hello, lovely warrior!
It's actually a very good question and I appreciate the way you treated my time here and overall your consideration! <3
I have already answered a question on Step3 last February [link] but everything that went on since then and the newer interviews made me think of other speculiations.
It might still be Step 3 in a way how suddenly Step 1 and 2 are re-released + new redisign still has hints towards these eras + her current outfits hint more towards the past + new merch style might be a hint + the long ago pinned post with the dragon might be a hint as well. I can't understand for sure whether it was Step 3 that she referred to as an album for dealing with the grief with a song ‘A Different Kind of Human’ being a hint towards the direction (and I would personally need such album the most after what I have been going through) but either way the mood of the upcoming album will be opposite:
“It is crazy […] that our worth is defined by something we can measure in numbers. Like our fortune, our followers or our weight or our height. It’s just crazy how we let these numbers decide so much, when they are so meaningless. I’m heading towards this direction on my next album again. So my fifth album… or fourth… is this my third? (laughs) Well, my next album is going to be inspired by this. And this album now ("The Gods We Can Touch") is kind of a bridge over to that. It’s about reminding ourselves of the value we have within us, about the powers we have. Love, and also it’s all about the small, simple things. It has nothing to do with our phones, with success, even with God. It’s just you and me, right here, right now. We’re just floating on a rock in space, so it doesn’t matter if I have a pimple on my cheek today. Because – who cares? It’s about thinking really big and really small at the same time (laughs).”
- AURORA on her next album in the interview for FastForward Magazine by Gabi Rudolph (January 27th, 2022)
It will be a really fun album *smiles widely*.”
- AURORA on her next album in the interview for ba.no, translated by aurora.puppet (February 2nd 2022)
“A Little Place Called The Moon" is the perfect ending. You have to wait so long for the final release where I finally come in again. I like the patience of it, it offers you one last breath before it all ends and disappears into the sky. And it’s a really good bridge to my next album. No [I can’t tell a bit more about it]!
AURORA on a significance of “A Little Place Called The Moon” as the connection to the next album in the interview for Official Charts (January 26th 2022)
"People like, or aliens like, I don't know myself... Ok, creatures like yourself that sing together in harmony, it's very gorgeous isn't it? I have started my next album! It has a lot of people's voices."
- AURORA before performing "The Innocent" @ Paradiso, Amsterdam (September 3rd 2022)
And there's something very interesting about a possible on that album song:
"I have a song out there I think that has taken me 10 years, this is the longest. It will be on my next album, it has taken so many years. But finally I've gone through what I wrote about. For the first time, so I understand the song more, as from the inside it was easier. So one song for my next album."
- AURORA in an open interview session with Bergen Bibliotek filmed by abaddonna (November 3rd 2022)
It is certainly connected to the song she has already described in 2016:
"I have a song now that I've been working on since I was 16, but I haven't found the right words to finish it. I know it will be a good song when it's perfect, but I'm just looking for one line in the fourth verse to complete it. And in four years, I haven't found that line yet."
- AURORA in an interview for Vice (March 11th 2016)
Whatever AURORA has in store I'm impatiently looking forward to this, I believe and see her artistic growth and that excites me a lot!
- Nikol
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callmelyc · 10 months
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Written for Twitter julance:
#2023JuLance
Week 1: Sharpshooter, Part 1- The Birth of a Name
If anyone on this planet had looked up they'd think lance was a shooting star. Blue lighting up the night as she hurled down to the planets surface to crash-land like a meteor in the night
And now here lance was hiding in the desert rock formations watching galra swarm the wreckage. It's just his luck to not only be separated from the others but to also have fallen smack dab into the center of a galra invaded planet.
"Shit-" lance curses watching them poke and prod at his baby blue from a safe distance but he knew he wasn't in any shape to fight right now and he sure as hell didn't want to be a prisoner. He'd barely spotted them to begin with with his head injury and all making his vision spin.
Just when he thinks the soldiers might turn to come his direction lance feels a small hand touch his own. It takes everything in him to not full body flinch and risk blowing his cover so he holds his breath.
He glances down slowly.
And is surprised to come face to face with a small....gecko?...looking closer lance thinks they remind him a lot of the Geico mascot but large enough to be a small child. They're about three feet tall, pastel yet colored like an oil spil when the sunlight bounces off their scales. It's honestly pretty mesmerizing to look at he could admit, if only his head wasn't swimming and everything hurt-
Stop it lance ur getting off track!
"Uh...hello?" Lance whispers warily only earning a smile from the little creature.
"Hello! I am selkie!" They say brightly "please follow me"
"W-wait I don't even kno-" but his protest fall quiet as his hand is taken in a surprisingly strong grip and he's pulled through tunnels that exist through the cliff sides. Selkie stays quiet throughout their trek and though lance had the second thought to fight the alien off he felt it was safer to trust this geico mascot over the galra anyday.
So here he is in a tightly fitted cave following behind someone smaller than pidge noting that every change in lighting causes selkies skin to shift both in pattern and color. It's....very distracting and it's not until they come to a stop that lance realized he didn't watch their path here.
"You are safe here!" Selkie says proudly looking up at lance with the cutest smile drawing him out of his own head and back to attention.
He glances up to take survey of the location only to find them still inside the cave system it's just a dead end "where are we?"
"The caverns" a new voice announces causing lance to finally be more on edge yet turns to see another small gecko alien of the same height as selkie "it is the only place the galra cannot navigate. Their large stature causes them to get stuck in the tunnel systems."
Oh. Well that makes sense lance thinks "and you are...?"
"I am Lorix, I am the leader of the Gekkota people." Lorix squints at lance taking in his stature "are you of the crashed vessel?"
"Oh you mean Blue? Yeah a mission gone wrong I was separated from my team and crashed here" lance watches how Lorix reacts to this for a moment deeming him a little trustworthy "My name is Lance, I'm the Blue Paladin of Voltron"
Lorixs eyes widen just a fraction "Voltron is real?"
"Yep! And it's our job to help where we can so-" lance kneels down to be eye level with the two "why don't ya tell me a bit about your galra problem."
As it turns out the skin shift wasn't just for show nor their small stature. The Gekkota people are known to be able blend into their surroundings through color reflection off their scales. That paired with their ability to fit into small tight spaces meant they could be practically invisible intruders and the galra wanted them for forced spy work.
"When they overtook the planet most fled into these caverns to hide-" selkie added before turning somber "they have started to flush us out through poisons, we fear they may result to other means soon"
As he watched these two share their story lance had already known hed help them but looking at them now only solidified his resolve.
"Hey-" he says into the silence gaining both their attention "how far up do these tunnels go?"
~*~
Lance finds himself learning the cave tunnels over the next day and a half because if his plan was gonna work he needed all the pieces in place perfectly. As it turns out the tunnel systems go all the way to the top and deep into the ground below the base surface level. It reminded him a lot of how ant farms or burrow systems might look: tight passageways, circular dead ends, and hundreds of interconnected pathways.
The point is it's easy to get lost and he doesn't wanna die down here especially if he's aiming to help these people by fending off the galra as they come.
So he's memorized the paths he needs, he knows the positions he'll switch between like the back of his hand. The galra won't ever spot him and they'll be falling before they get the chance. It's more ruthless than he's used to being, but lance was alone here and he had an entire planet of innocent people to help. you can bet your ass he was gonna do it by any means necessary.
Lance sit here now waiting for his moment to act. There's specific times the galra will send out people to do the rounds in an attempt to capture more of the people here and with blue close by they might even be looking for him. Little do they know lance won't let them get that far.
He's crouching in his first position atop the left cliffside just out of sight, Bayard drawn and formed into a sniper rifle. When the first galra patrol comes into view he lets them get a little too close just to make sure they don't catch on too quickly.
A deep breath
In and out
Three shots fired in quick succession followed by three bodies hitting the ground. The bombs they'd had in their hands go off but this time no one in the caverns is fighting the poison.
Score 1 for Lance and 0 for the Galra.
This continues over the course of the next three days, galra appear each group growing larger than the previous and lance strikes them down one by one from altering positions so they never spot him.
He rotates the choices, ya know to spice things up a bit, really lay on the confusion and he knows he's winning because they've grown increasingly more frustrated.
The galra attacks grow more violent too, they've gone from smoke bowms filled with poison to flat out trying to crumble the caves themselves. Eventually they switch it up from simple small patrol groups to full on fleets of galra and sentry combined, both more heavily equipped.
So he switches his tactics too, lance doesn't let any get close if he can help it. He's shooting from further away now, further than he thought himself capable of hitting his mark, but with every shot fired he never fails to hit it like a bullseye. The moment he sees them in the distance, the moment he can tell it's an enemy and not an innocent bystander he lines his rifle and takes his shot.
His cover provided Selkie and Lorix with the time and safety to gather more of their people into the same tunnels as well as gather more needed provisions. It also allowed for Intel gathering.
"They have grown weary of you Paladin Lance" Lorix says one day during a down period "you have taken so much of their forces here they had to request for backup"
Lances alien sandwich falls from his hand "backup?"
"Yes! They seem to have contacted a secondary fleet in a neighboring galaxy-" he says between chews "we are a dead zone, the only life in this galaxy exist here so they did not think to send more aid until you arrived."
"Yes yes!" Selkie adds "there is much radio chatter about the missing blue paladin. They do not have the equipment to move your crashed vessel but with the backup they seem hopeful in gathering it"
Lance let's that information sinks in while continuing to eat his previously dropped sandwich-dont judge him!- before his mind zeros in on one part "did you say there was radio chatter about me?"
"That is correct, from various sources it seems" Lorix confirms with a nod "some galra some otherwise-"
Lance grips lorixs tiny shoulders "otherwise?? Did you happen to catch any names or descriptions? Do you know what they were saying?"
"Ah- well," he says seeming to think it over "there was a mention of a coalition? And a princess Allura looking for a blue paladin"
"Oh thank god-" he sighs "that's my team, if they can get a signal they can give us backup."
Selkie and Lorix exchange glances before frowning "how will we do that?"
Lance looks back at them pausing to think it over for a minute and smirks "actually....I have an idea"
~*~
It's nightfall when they choose to act, lance knows for a fact they've stationed a heavily armed set of guards around Blue and he also knows she has her particle varried up and loaded. So all he needs to do is get in just close enough to phase through it, run in, set off her emergency signal for his team and hightail it out of there.
First things first though, the guards.....
There's surprisingly only three sentries but for some reason this really sets lance on edge. Something doesn't feel right about this but he can't back out now. He takes his stance, sends a small hang signal to Lorix and Selkie who are on standby and runs out into the open guns ablaze.
It's the first sentry getting shot down that tells lance what's wrong. They were decoys, once shot they send off a visual signal while simultaneously blowing up, which lance found out the fun way.
Aka getting thrown back a few hundred feet and gaining yet another head injury.
Fighting to get back up he knows he has to work fast, that signal couldn't have been anything good, so lance runs. He runs as fast as he can dodging the best he can when the remaining sentries charge towards him because if he can just get to blue she'll let him in.
He feels her weak energy reach out to him and smiles.
He can do this.
Throwing himself into a clean slide he slips right under the final sentry and luckily right through blues partial barrier that flies back up the moment lance is safely inside.
"that's my girl!" Lance cheers climbing back into the safety of her hull.
"I know your hurt baby girl but don't worry-" he pats her side gently while sifting through things to get to the emergency panel "I'll get the team right on it"
Lance works the fastest he can through the dizziness, sets off the SOS signal and does a repeat of his initial fight only this time to leave. It's a narrow escape made possible only by the help of Selkie who manages to trip a sentry into another just long enough for them to get back into the underground.
They move quickly for a bit only deeming themselves safe once back to the center "what do we do now paladin?" Lorix ask worried "the beacon the sentry sent us worrisome-"
"I know" lance sighs "the only thing we can do now is wait. I'll take watch, hold em off as long as I can and hope my team catches the distress signal fast enough..."
Selkie puts a reassuring hand on his arm "you are not alone in this fight paladin lance, we can do what we are best at-" she smiles at him and it clicks "if you are a ghost to them, then so shall we be"
The battle that ensues is a tough one, lance positioned at the highest possible point sniping down enemy after enemy while the Gekkoas work from the ground camouflaging themselves so quickly it confuses the galra enough to be taken down by them. Together they make a deadly team, moving in silence and to the galra invisible the waves that hit them go down like rain.
By the time daylight has arrived on the final day, Voltron arrives and gives a helping hand. They're quick to pickup on lances strategy and in less than an hour they've finally freed the planet Euble and all it's people.
And with their victory lance can finally rest.
~*~
"Sir, we have a report" a large galran says to his commander.
The commander turns, his frown a permanent fixture yet he doesn't glance up from his small device "What is it Vox?"
"It's about Euble, the ghost won sir. They have been freed with the aid of Voltron."
The device in the commanders hand snaps in his crushing grip, the frown turning into a snarl "What?!"
Silence hangs heavy before the commander turns to hit his fist angrily on the nearest wall "we have to report this to the main fleet-"
A com system appears, a video transmission going through before a higher ranking officer picks up the call "what is it Commander Krox?"
"Euble has fallen, The Ghost Rite won"
An angry tsk can be heard through the screen "and who is this Ghost Rite that took down all your men?"
"The sniper of Voltron..... The Blue paladin"
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epicrox · 1 year
Text
Till The End Of The Moon Review - Episode 1 part 1
WARNING: SPOILERS BELOW
PARTS: 1.1 | 1.2 |
This is mostly for me to look back on and see the moments that I caught my eye. Nothing analytical. I offer nothing to the table
I'm also a visual person so there's a lot of screenshots x
I'm so glad the opening credit is animated. Usually I have to put my phone down to enjoy the theme song without being spoiled. Plus it's so pretty
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2. There's so much CGI, it's making my head hurt.
3. EYELINER!
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4. Ahh its Wang Yi Fei! I can totally see her and Mobei-Jun drinking together and talking about serving their demonic rulers. Maybe rant a little to each other
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5. Some of these moments give me sci-fi vibes. Is this not technology?
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6. Can be easily mistaken for an intergalactic overlord. Can he be categorised as one?
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7. That's basically an alien invasion
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8. Ooooh magical sniper
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9. Luo Yunxi always looks so ethereal but now in a demonic way
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10. I'd now like to congratulate Tantai Jin for becoming a honorary member of the “Cold Duke of the North” club by saying this singular word when the FL (Li Su Su) did something cool:
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11. OMG I never noticed he had highlights in his hair
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12. Wang Yi Fei looks kinda creepy in the background
13. I really like this screenshot of him
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14. Cinematic shots + epic/rock music
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15. Who's that character that gives another character a kiss on the forehead to protection them? I feel like Li Su Su must've gotten that when she was born or she is an ancient creature that has been reincarnated. I think.
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16. For some reason I was thinking about Glinda. But she didn't kiss Dorothy on the forehead did she? Just told her to wear the red slippers.
17. He's also wearing some kind of lipstick. Probably everyone's "cult favourite" Clinique Black Honey.
18. Bleed on it!
19. Magical Object - The Mirror of the Past - Holds some importance - can bring down the Devil God.
20. Currently holding perhaps a celestial being or just a talking object. The Dispatcher of the story according to Vladimir Propp's theory.
21. Thank you GCSE Media for that little nugget of knowledge
22. Did not expect him to be bullied in his past life.
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23. Now sir, Dispatcher guy (being in the object) never said you had to kill Tantai Jin
24. Li Su Su's father knows something about her unique forehead mark/protection. My guesses are that he'll tell Su Su while he's dying.
25. FINISH HIM! (Mortal Kombat Voice)
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26. Maybe he won't be the one to tell her
27. My girl just said she's going to kill you and THIS is your reaction:
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28. Like he's just standing there
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29. Tantai Jin: (confusingly looking around) ...wtf just happened.
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30. I like how he looks back at where Li Su Su was levitating seconds before getting zapped somewhere. Gives me the feeling that he might also travel back in time to stop her. Might disrupt Ye Xi Wu (Li Su Su) and pre Devil God Tantai Jin's relationship. Have a love triangle with himself. He might be jealous their relationship, wanting her for himself. Similar to that one extra scene in SVSSS. Just a thought. The background music adds to the tension.
31. I keep comparing him to Luo Binghe like I did in my first post about this drama 1 or 2 years ago. There are a few similarities between them as the drama continues.
I'm splitting Episode 1 into 2 parts cuz I said too much for the first 27 minutes of this drama. The first episode felt too rushed to me. Maybe that's just me but the pacing gets better afterwards.
Hopefully I write less in my other review posts. I struggle with being concise so probably not.
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mysteli · 9 months
Text
THE ANDROMEDA BOOKS
Here's the first story introductions for my complete rewrite of Endless Summer. I've included very rough visualizations of what I would want the covers to look like, more to establish a tone for each book though. Let me know what kind of scenes you'd be interested in me posting. I won't be posting anything that ruins any of the twists though - more to show the change in the characters and the setting.
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THE STORY CONCEPT
This rewrite is an exploration into the first timeline. Before Lo became The Endless and the timeline where all of the group presumably died. But what if that wasn't the full story? What if the origin story was more different than anyone ever really imagined? What change had come to the island throughout 1000 timelines? What happened in the five years Lo was in that pod and even more curiously, what happened after? Were the relationships between every character always the same? All these questions will be answered in this book.
BOOK 1 SYNOPSIS
A last hurrah on the mysterious island of La Huerta for a group of 12 young souls swiftly becomes odd when they arrive and everyone is gone. While some seek to know more, others still want to experience this once in a lifetime opportunity. Conflicting perspectives and an island trapped in multiple stages of time. There may be other unknown forces at play. Meanwhile, Lo is having disturbing visions about elements of the island, the people around her and a constellation that could be her saving grace or her downfall. After an unexpected death rocks their defenses, they will all have no choice but to seek out the truth, while watching out for the shadow of the powerful owner with a plan, Everett Rourke. The real question is, will they be able to trust each other?
Some of the book's elements - Takes place before the five year time jump. The island is plagued by new mythological/technological creatures, as well as familiar ones. Main romance is Jake and Lo so Quinn, Estela and Sean will not be treated as love interests because I literally hate love triangles and would rather write one romance as the focus and explore other side romances and see what I can do with them. More backstory and main plot links for all characters. New lore for Lo (so she's not an alien). New island lore also. Unexpected dynamics and duos; for example, Estela and Michelle. Beware - character deaths.
BOOK 2 SYNOPSIS
As Lo wakes up from five years of being frozen in a pod, she has no memory of where or who she is. The first face she sees is one she recognizes but cannot remember. A man who saved her from her slumber. After escaping Rourke's facility, she's greeted by an island that had succumb to ruin. Her mind is taking her back to the events of the last five years, as she tries to find the people her former self gave everything for. What happened to them and who was still out there, in a world so close to its end?
Some of the book's elements - you get none... yet.
CONCLUSION
Hope these are good introductions to what I have planned. I have a character specific one coming soon but I wanted to outline the concept of the stories before I did anything else. Please feel free to provide any feedback you have. I love knowing how I can make it better <3
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bored-trans-lesbian · 3 months
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This is almost, peak Fig.
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Emily herself saying Fig was more or less done (until Brenan had plans for her this season) Confirms for me that Fig's arc in seasons 1 and 2 is basically a complete story all it's own. It is such a well-told story and she goes through a remarkable amount of growth and development, as a character and even as a player. S1 Emily and S2 Emily feel so different that even as they play the same character with the same major flaw, the kind of story she goes into is developing. Not to mention to kind of out-of-nowhere romance of fiery passion is so *fig* it's perfect. For all the jokes about Fig and Gorgug being rock stars, it feels like the success has barely affected them.
Seeing not just one, but two of her girlfriend (succubus?) 's feathers in her hair, more than the one functional one for summoning her, suggests to me Ayda has better understood romantic/symbolic gestures, and while Fig loudly declaring her being a wizard's paramore as part of her identity in the trailer gave me life as-is, seeing the feathers in her art is so nice. I'd also like to say, as a tiefling main myself, seeing her horns develop and get longer/more curved is interesting. I wonder if her archdevil role is influencing her growth, into more of a Cambion kind of creature? In many ways I'm curious about what Fig's later life could be like, especially if her lifespan is beyond typical mortal. I feel like should she outlive *her* Ayda's lifespan, she might see the next Ayda as more like a daughter, or if the very thought of constantly being reminded of her lost love would be too painful. A bit grim but a fascinating concept of the character. I understand she's born of an archdevil and a normal elf, but to my understanding being a *direct* archdevil's child rather than a more distant descendant already makes a cambion, and on top of that she has taken her father's position and is in a devoted relationship with one of the strongest wizards in all of Spyre, devils tending to be influenced by magic and the like... Ultimately it's up to Emily and Brennan but the lore setup is there for her to wind up a significantly more powerful and long-lived creature than most of her friends. Considering her full archdevil father can hold down a normal job as a high school coach it wouldn't alienate her too much from her life.
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sleuth-draws · 4 months
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LOVESICK (part 1) - Wanna Fight, Princess? next >
Though it takes months upon months, Vitani and Kiara become quite close. 
Once the Outlanders had settled in the Pridelands, Vitani had initially been standoffish, preferring to either stick close to her former squadron or patrol the borders of the Pridelands by herself. Loathe as she was to keep away from her brother -- her only family now -- being around the royal family caused her hackles to raise involuntarily. It did nothing to quell King Simba’s leftover anxieties over how trustworthy the daughter of his enemy was but she needed time, they all knew; to spend your life as a pawn to a warmonger, preparing to overthrow a kingdom, and then end up making peace and living in said kingdom is no easy task.
It all changed with the concern of who would fill the position of Lion Guard in Kion's stead. All the creatures of the Pridelands were called to the Rock to seek council and discuss. It was an open forum and anyone was allowed to offer their suggestions. As King Simba would mention in his preamble to the meeting, his father would hold meetings like this so the lower subjects would not feel alienated in his reign.
Like clockwork, they gathered in the center of the plain, the royal family lying upon a flat rock, lions of their court around them, the elephants in the back and allowing smaller creatures to rest upon them, baboons and their babies nestled into trees alongside giraffes. The buffalo rest by the watering hole, the hippos poking their heads over the water’s surface, keeping cool as they listen, and the zebra and antelope graze all the while.
Vitani had never seen so much prey in one place, but contrary to seemingly popular belief, she’s no mongrel. She chose to linger in the back, feeling out of place in the communal crowd and hardly listening to them all babble on and on.
It was only when Kiara spoke up that her attention was caught. "What about Vitani?"
Creatures of all sizes turned towards her. Vitani, startled, bared her teeth out of instinct. "What about me?"
The prey around her trembled at her hostile response, but Kiara was unphased; in fact, she smiled. "Well, I figure if there's anyone who's up to protecting the Pridelands, it'd be you. I always see you out there diligently patrolling the border."
The Pridelanders couldn't help but agree. While initially stubbornly reluctant to fill such a highly spoken-of position, even Vitani had to admit: being the Pridelands' protector gave her something to do that felt satisfyingly familiar. 
King Simba, placing an overwhelming amount of trust in his daughter, gave his blessing in the decision; the job was hers from then on, but she couldn’t do it alone. Her Guard needed the strongest, fastest, bravest, and keenest-of-sight she could find and there was no group better equipped for these positions as her old squadron.
They all took to it quite quickly. It seems they were feeling similarly out of place in the aftermath of the war. Imara, with her newfound strength from her weight gain after finally finding sufficient food, impressed the Pridelanders with her ability to carry so many of them out of harm’s way. Kasi, eager to use her skills from her days as the team’s scout, rivaled Fuli, her predecessor, in her record speeds to relay information between trouble and the Guard. Shabaha found the life of a simple subject to be rather boring and was at last able to achieve the thrills she’d missed from her days in the Outlands. And Tazama, once trained to be an observant lookout, felt satisfaction in her usefulness to the kingdom, in a way that was far less murderous and risky.
They already had the advantage of knowing how to work as a unified team. As the Guard, they prospered far more than before.
And so, slowly, Vitani began to open up more. Protecting the lands put her in everyone's good graces; she was no longer a soldier, but a guardian.
This also meant reporting closely to Kiara. King Simba was emboldened from his daughter’s vouching of Vitani and placed her in charge of the Guard’s operations. The princess, strange creature that she is, seemed more than happy to have a way to keep in contact with Vitani, even to the point of becoming… friends . 
Vitani had always found her to be odd. Pretty. But odd. Before she’d assumed Kiara was a ditz, just a royal with shit for brains who understood nothing of life’s realities and was easy enough to trick into being a cog in her mother’s plan; but when she and Kovu ended the war by force, all her assumptions were dashed instantly.
She leaned into it. Kiara was kind. Though the royal family might have given her the creeps sometimes, Vitani had no reason to think she held any animosity toward her, especially Kovu at her side.
As their relationship slowly transitioned from friendly at work to friends before and after work, it was strangely easy to lie in the sun with her, chat about their days, and even groom one another, just as the other lions do.
Which leads them to now.
As per usual after the day’s work is done, the pair of them are stretched out together on a grassy strip and enjoying the warm sunset. Conversation had metered out into content silent.
Beyond comfortable in the dirt, her arms and paws satisfyingly sore from evening patrol, Vitani can’t help but linger on the fact that she no longer feels the anxiety she used to feel in the Pridelands. Things changed entirely without her even realizing.
Vitani asks, "Hey. Can I ask you something?"
Kiara looks over and gave that bright, playful smile of hers. "You just did."
"Aw, shut up."
Kiara giggles. Vitani can't help but crack her own grin. "Sorry, sorry. Go ahead."
“You remember the council meeting from a couple seasons ago? The one where they were discussing who’d lead the Lion Guard.”
“Yeah?”
“Why’d you vouch for me then?”
Surprised for a moment, Kiara quickly sobers and sits up from her supine position. "Oh. Well...I mean, I meant what I said. There's really no one I could think of that'd be better for the job than you."
"But we didn't know each other then. Not like now." The princess has a way with getting people to open up to her.
"True, but Kovu had told me a lot about you."
Kovu. Right. Vitani's throat tightens for a reason unknown to her.
Kiara continues, eyes searching Vitani's, "He's told me about how strong you are and how you took care of him when no one else could. You were at the forefront of Zira's army."
Vitani breaks eye contact to swipe at some pebbles in front of her. "Ain't exactly a good thing, Princess."
"What I mean is, you're experienced in both leading a group and extending that paw of guardianship.”
Vitani grumbles, brushing off the accolade. She shouldn’t have asked. 
Kiara examines her for longer before smiling a tad cheekily. 
“You wanna know something? You act all cool and tough and mysterious, but at this point, I think I've got you pegged, Vitani."
Vitani raises a brow, something of a thrill rolling over the fur on her back. "Oh, you do , do you?"
Kiara leans in, smiling. "Yeah. Despite it all, you're a big softie ."
It's enough to throw Vitani into a fit of laughter. She shoves Kiara's shoulder. "Oh, fuck you!"
Kiara shoves back. "It's true! You're a lion on the outside, but, like, a bunny on the inside!"
"You take that back!" Vitani pounces and Kiara receives her readily. The two wrestle in the dirt, laughing and kicking up grass. Kiara is not the little lioness she was at the time of the war. She's bulked up significantly since then, with her training to ascend to the crown continuing where it had left off. Vitani has to admit; she's rather impressed by her progress. She herself has started to fill out with her newfound and ever-replenishing food source here in the Pridelands, but Kiara was truly something to marvel at in terms of physique goals.
Eventually, Vitani breaks free, panting, "Damn, I guess the termite's been teaching you well!"
Kiara glared playfully. "Oh, none of that was Kovu; my mom taught me those moves!"
"Oh, yeah?" Vitani rolled her shoulders in anticipation and crouched readily, "Well, now I'm interested. Show me some of those moves you learned from your mommy ; I want a good fight outta you, Princess!"
Kiara readies herself, almost perfectly mirroring Vitani. "Bring it on!"
With that, the two leapt at one another.
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truly-sincerely · 2 months
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Okay let's try this again from the top (Now with AO3 link)
Dark Star Falling 1 - hot and cold
This is gonna be:
reasonably high fidelity to game canon
starting in act 3, at Wyrm's Rock Fortress
a series of vignettes, mostly between canon scenes
an agender/tiefling durge x astarion
mostly about dealing with intense durgetash feelings
Elient 22
“So… Thank you. For being that evil bastard.”
Darling is only half paying attention. Astarion can see the wheels turning in their head–an expression which has, in the past, foretold some of their more elaborate crimes. It was easy to see how the party had made it this far–with Darling doing the battle math and checking for exits as casually as breathing. They aren’t like any bard Astarion has ever met.
Even their aggravating predilection for rescuing every pathetic urchin and bedraggled gnome they come across is only a minor inconvenience in the larger scheme of playing their enemies off each other and picking off whoever’s left. Darling always seems to find a way to make a profit off of even the most pathetic victims.
Karlach has stormed off to the far end of the hall. Darling’s gaze follows her thru the crowd. Wyll is standing nearby waiting impatiently to talk to his father, or what’s left of him.
“Hey, Star? Do me a favor?”
“Whatever you need, precious bhaal-babe,” Astarion says, sliding into Darling’s field of view. Darling snickers in spite of themself and paws his chest, eliciting a self-satisfied smile from the vampire. He’s known about Darling’s heritage for all of ten minutes and he’s already teasing them about it.
The revelation that they’re Bhaalspawn and one of the architects of the Absolute hoax is certainly a shock but the more he thinks about it, the more it makes sense. Darling has always been hot and cold–not one and then the other, but both simultaneously. Playful, dangerous, and insatiable. A creature that acts wounded to lure predators in and then snaps them up. 
“Talk to Ravengard with Wyll, would you?” they ask, looking back in the direction of the Grand Duke as tho not sure he’ll still be there. Ravengard is standing to the side of the throne, looking like little more than one of the many Fists strewn about the hall.
“I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but all that’s beneath that eminently smooth pate is a tadpole.”
“Then talk to the tadpole,” Darling snaps, and then their expression softens into something apologetic. “Maybe Wyll can get thru to him. I dunno. And tell Karlach to go back to camp, please.”
“That’s probably for the best. Wyll had to physically restrain her when Gortash was calling you his ‘nearest and dearest’,” he titters. “I haven’t seen her this angry since she was turning that Paladin of Tyr into paste.”
“If I find out I had something to do with Gortash betraying her I’m going to throw myself into the Chionthar,” Darling says, and they have such a pained look on their face that Astarion is overwhelmed by an alien desire to say something gentle. Fortunately, Darling turns and walks away before he can embarrass himself.
– – –
The Archduke is just standing there, surveying the nobles as they mingle. Darling can hear one of the patriars complaining about cheese. Gortash doesn’t have a tadpole, but Darling thinks he’s wearing the same expression that they’ve seen on their companions when one is making use of their parasites–eyes unfocused, almost but not quite nodding, listening to nothing, generally distant. As they watch him they think they can see him subvocalizing. He’s connected to someone or something telepathically.
Darling reads the Weave around him. He’s protected by multiple enchantments from his equipment and otherwise. Magic that grants him more presence, more authority, more confidence. Too much confidence. He’s drunk on it.
His languid gaze passes over Darling. His eyes meet theirs and his expression changes–his smile changes–it moves up into his eyes. Darling’s breath catches as he holds their gaze.
They catch themself making battle plans and–realizing that their best course of action would be to lay down cover and let Karlach get in his face and chop him to pieces before he can invoke the powers of his god–they let slip the tiniest of smiles on one side of their mouth. His expression shifts again. They see recognition in his look. He’s reading them too.
Darling whispers an almost silent expletive to themself, covering their face with a hand, pretending to brush stray hair out of their eyes. Suddenly he’s standing before them.
“Follow me up to my office,” he commands, and then, seeing their eyes narrow, adds in a softer tone, “We could be good for each other.”
“What will you tell me?” they ask stiffly. He looks down at the creak of leather as Darling’s glove tightens around the grip of their blade. Gortash shifts closer as if to shield Darling’s indiscretion from sight, but who’s sight? They glance over at Astarion and Wyll who are engrossed in whatever Ravengard is saying. Gortash moves his hand over Darling’s, brushing his fingertips across their knuckles. He smells like vanilla. Their voice cracks as they whisper, “I don’t know you.”
“Join me upstairs and we can use that dagger for whatever you like,” he proposes. Darling’s body responds with what feels like the expenditure of every chemical at its disposal. They stumble half a step back, suddenly keenly aware of an oven-like heat between his body and theirs. Gortash wonders pleasantly at their outsized reaction.
“Is this guy bothering you, darling?” Astarion’s voice comes from behind Darling moments before he touches their back gently.
“Yes!,” they respond, loud and shrill. “I mean no. No! Gods...”
Gortash and Astarion take a moment to size each other up while Darling recovers their composure. Astarion is accustomed to Darling’s occasional fits of nausea and twitching, and from observing Gortash’s demeanor in the moment, he is as well. It seems he really does know Darling as well as he claims to.
It doesn’t last long. Darling straightens up and turns their body into Astarion’s and says, “We’re going back to camp.” Astarion links an arm around Darling’s and leads them toward the door. Wyll follows them out, looking back at Gortash and leveling a particularly diabolic stinky eye his way.
Gortash watches the trio of adventurers exit, still wearing that smug smile.
They’re alive and they’re still themself, more or less.
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quinloki · 2 months
Note
I don't know if you have Netflix or not, but they recently put a show on there called Resident Alien starring Alan Tudyk and I highly recommend it. If you've ever seen 3rd Rock from the Sun, this is kind of like that but more sinister but equally as funny.
I also took tally of all my One Piece figures (some of which won't arrive until September) and here's the breakdown:
3 of Trafalgar
3 of Shanks (one is pre-ordered)
2 of Zoro
2 of Beckman (one is pre-ordered)
1 of Sir Crocodile
1 of Arlong
1 of Smoker
1 of Kid
1 of Borsalino (pre-ordered)
1 of Aramaki (pre-ordered and no one that evil should look that good the bastard)
And then saved in my to purchase list are:
7 more Shanks (one has kid Luffy too)
6 more Trafalgar
5 more Zoro
3 more Sir Crocodile
2 Ace
1 Sabo
1 Marco
1 Mihawk (I don't even care for him but the pose damn near has me drooling)
1 Doffy
1 Sakazuki
1 more Smoker
1 more Kid
I have built a little shrine around my OP DVDs and it's too small to hold all of these future purchases, so I'm trying to figure out where to put them all. In the meantime, when the non-pre-ordered figures come in, I'll share a photo of the shrine. I don't know why I have a hankering for Shanks recently but now Gildarts from Fairy Tail has suck up on me. I do like Marco and I want at least 1 Sabo figure because I like having Luffy's most important people (Zoro, Shanks, and his two bothers).
I don't really know what else to distract you with, um, I had an idea for a One Piece/Fairy Tail crossover one-shot. For some reason, yesterday at dinner this idea popped into my head and had me grinning like an idiot which alarmed my dad. What if, the FT peeps ended up in the OP world for reasons not important to the story so I won't ever have to get into it, and Cana decided now would be a good time to try setting her dad up on a date. Dude has been single her entire life (with a string of unsuccessful short flings that never amounted to anything [the wiki says he was with 13 other women post-divorce]) and she decides to set him up with somebody.
Now, this could go two ways. I could have this be a canon character x canon character or OC which would be the hard way and not nearly as funny as I want it to be OR I could make it canon character x reader thus allowing for the shenanigans. I was thinking of having the one-shot be Gildarts x Reader with him having already met someone and begun dating her but keeping it quiet because he didn't know how Cana would react. Then, when Cana announces how she thinks he should meet someone and kind of sidelines him, Reader plays along because she has to keep up the ruse of them not dating. So the READER sets Gildarts up on a date with a hot, young doctor lady.
And I just thought it'd be hilarious to do that to Gildarts.
The only other idea I have of a simple crossover would be Gildarts and Shanks meeting and upon realizing they kind of look similar, the two hang out in the bar and start comparing how similar they are to each other and then it becomes a contest of who is cooler. Shanks thinking he's so cool because he's maintained his power as an Emperor of the sea despite having only one arm, and how he lost that arm is both cool and inspiring. Then Gildarts dishes it back about how he lost half his body (and an unspecified organ) and is the only person to survive the creature who did it in single combat. Et cetera and so forth. It could be hilarious and also be a fun way to actually show how similar they are without being boring.
Alright, this time I'm sure I've run out of distracting things but if I come up with more I'll be sure to send them in to you. Sorry about your evening burning out.
I need to watch more Fairy Tail so I actually meet this Gildarts - I've seen the art of him so I know the similarity is there =3 But every time I get into FT I end up stopping just after the Lightning Church arc with the guild master's grandson.
Not for lack of interest, but something always seems to come along and pull my attention before I get any further.
Last time it was One Piece >.>
I like the set up for the story idea - the best part about stories that we sometimes forget is that they don't have to explain everything. You're allowed to leave loose threads or things unresolved.
I'm in awe of the your figurine collection. I keep holding myself back, because I don't really have room for one, but also because I can get carried away to a bad degree with collecting things. But I do enjoy seeing a lot of the One Piece figures, so I'm patiently awaiting any pics you're willing to share once more of your order comes in =3
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Back in 2011, I was asked "So, what old DC comic would YOU like to reboot, and what's the angle, and can you draw a cover for this theoretical comic relaunch?" I was not asked this by a professional editor at DC, but by my friend Jon who was doing a themed blog thingie. Look, it was before the world we live in now—we had time to imagine a better world and fool around! Anyway, I am reposting the "pitch" I wrote, as well as the illo I did back in 2011 (below), just to have it here. Above is a more recent posca drawing/painting of Dart (as you will see if you read the wall of text below, she's my favorite 😂)
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ATARI FORCE #1 (of 12)
2063: A.T.A.R.I. (Advanced Technology And Research Institute) combs an infinite number of realities in order to find a suitable new world for the population of a dying Earth. In their travels through the Multiverse, one of the expeditionary forces does battle with and ultimately kills the ultimate evil - a lovecraftian devourer of dimensions they dub the DARK DESTROYER. In the course of this battle, they find a perfect, empty world in a universe teeming with advanced civilizations. After some false starts both the recolonization of New Earth and the socialization of the New Earthlings with the rest of their new neighbors is a success.
2088: THE ATARI FOUNDATION, now the de facto governing party of New Earth, has ushered in a new era of utopian prosperity. After the Old Earth was brought to the brink of destruction by gross negligence and mismanagement, the people of New Earth are only too happy to put themselves in the guiding hands of ATARI. All live in relative prosperity and happiness..
Except for MARTIN CHAMPION, brilliant Multiversal scientist and the leader of the original expedition that battled the Destroyer. Martin is haunted by the death of his wife in childbirth, and is convinced that the Dark Destroyer somehow caused it. Instead of going about his life and picking up the pieces, Martin sits in his lab sending probes out in to the Multiverse, in hopes of finding proof of the existence of the Dark Destroyer. Martin has, over the years, become a laughingstock of ATARI, as well as driven his now adult son out of his life, due to misplaced anger about the death of his wife. All he has left is his obsession..
Until one of his probes goes missing after sending back readings of energy very similar to the kind the Destroyer radiates. Worried that he's given the Dark Destroyer a direct route back to New Earth in the lost probe, Martin hijacks his now antique Multiversal scout ship
SCANNER ONE and heads out to stop the Destroyer once and for all. To help him on this mission, he enlists:
ERIN BIA O'ROURKE-SINGH, aka DART - A telepathic mercenary, as well as his goddaughter. She's one of the deadliest, sexiest beings in the universe, and she has a precognitive "second sight" that comes in handy.
MORPHEA - An alien empath, forced on Champion by the ATARI FOUNDATION to serve as his psychiatrist. Ostensibly she's there to help him with his "delusions", but her connection to Martin's deepest convictions gives her reason to think he's actually right about the danger facing the Multiverse.
CHRIS CHAMPION, aka TEMPEST - Martin's estranged son. A professional fighting champion who's anger management issues and freakish teleportation abilities have made him a star in the Mega-Brawl circuit.
Wanted by the government of New Earth, and pursued by the ATARI Security Squad, Champion has to outwit them all and defeat the ultimate expression of evil all over again. Luckily this time he has the new, improved, ATARI FORCE!
Over the course of their adventure, their rag tag team grows in size as they pick up new members:
BABE - The hulking, freakishly strong infant from a world of rock-like creatures.
TUKLA OLY, aka PAKRAT - An impish, self-absorbed master thief who goes into berserker rages when cornered.
TAZ - A master soldier, last of her race, who carries deep anger and sadness within her.
MOSES FISK, aka BLACKJAK - Dart's lover, a roguish mercenary once thought dead, secretly brainwashed to do the Dark Destroyer's bidding. --- I loved AF as a kid, so when Jon asked me what book I'd reboot if I got the chance, it was one of a handful of titles I considered. I especially loved Jose Luis Garcia-Lopez' designs and storytelling, and Gerry Conway did a really good job weaving all these plot threads together in an exciting way.
My reboot of the book would reprise it as a 12 issue mini series (or maxi series, as it would have been called back then), and really play up some of the hard sci fi elements at the fringes of the concept, as well as inject a sort of European sense of storytelling to the character bits, while still remaining true to the general arc of the original.
The only character I would really change that much is Chris, who in the original is pretty lame/bland/whiney and was quickly overshadowed by Dart. I thought giving him the MMA-style fighting league to be a part of would be something interesting for him to use to try and cope with being crapped on by his dad all his life, as well as ground him more than in the original series, where he's really sort of a cypher-brat.
Another wrinkle I would explore is the sexual tension between him and his "sister", Dart. It's hinted at in the original series, but I think that I'd have it bloom fully in my version on these long weeks and months stuck on Scanner One - Chris always having had a thing for Dart since they were kids, and Dart being rather depressed and lovesick because of Blackjak's apparent death early in the series. Things would, of course get rather sticky when Blackjak reappears.
Needless to say, the ATARI FORCE gang eventually wins out against the new iteration of the Dark Destroyer, but not without some serious losses, and they limp off still wanted by the ATARI FOUNDATION and use the failing Multiversal drive on Scanner One to take them into unknown space..
Atari Force was created by Gerry Conway and Roy Thomas. (Read more)
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Lilah Parallel Episode 1: Nexus Glow
Today's the day that Lilah is set to officially become a Crystal Gem, but there's one slight problem: she hasn't exhibited any of the important magical powers that every golem relies upon to protect themselves. Lilah decides to ask her guardians for help in making a magical weapon, but they've got problems of their own today: a corrupted diopside is heading towards Beach City, and they need to poof her before she arrives at her destination.
Rated 18+ for swearing & adult concepts, NOT AT ALL FOR KIDS!
JUNE 21, 2019.
3:05 PM EST.
BEACH CITY, LENNAVERE, APPALACHIAN CONFEDERATION.
Marcus “Mark” Parallel exhaled as he inspected the almost banquet hall he’d helped set up in the school gymnasium. “We did alright, Mark,” said Jerry the gym teacher as he pushed in the very last chair, gently so as to not upset the small flowerpots of orange-red poppies adorning the long, white cloth-clad table.
Mark nodded. “Yeah, we did. The post-graduation ceremony’s going to be okay.”
“Are you sure that you don’t want to come?”
“Jerry, I’ve been to fifteen of these things and they’ve all been the same, I won’t be missing much. Besides, today’s Lilah’s graduation too, and I promised her that I wouldn’t miss that.”
“It’s a shame that your kid never got to go here. She sounds like a good egg.”
“You and your obsession with eggs,” Mark scoffed playfully before growing serious. “I wanted her to at least have the option of a normal childhood. It sucks that things have to be what they are.”
“I know,” Jerry sighed. “Sometimes I wonder why these folks keep electing the same jerks to the board. Take care, buddy. Say hi to the kid for me.”
“I will.” And with that, Mark left.
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The light went red. Mark stopped at the intersection of Concord and Basset. He’d never liked this intersection, and the reason why hung on the right side of the light facing him.
The sign was an irregular hexagon, a flat bottom tapering up to a skinny top, a black ring separating the white interior from an outer ring of white. Four colorful humanoids – two medium-sized ones in light green and pink lemonade pink, a large one in dark blue, and a slightly smaller large one in electric blue – trampling a fifth, medium-sized black one. Underneath the image was the acronym “G.E.M.” painted in black.
Mark stared longingly at the electric blue pictogram. The light turned green, and he drove on.
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Two miles outside of Beach City’s western border was a small farm on a large, flat hill. The plantings were of edible species carefully chosen for low invasive potential; beyond them were odd trees here and there, assorted wild plants, and one patch that was completely covered in poison ivy for some reason. Finally, there was the barn-like house standing at the hill’s apex, a humble, dark red wooden building hiding a far less humble interior. Mark and his daughter lived in this place, as did their…foreign houseguests.
Mark drove his car onto a specific patch of flattened ground and pressed a green button on his car keys. The ground beneath him shuddered downwards, a force field extending over him as he descended and the shaft closed. Once the panel was flat on the floor, Mark got out of his car and entered a white-tiled hallway, barren save for paintings of various styles adorning its walls.
“Hey Mark,” said a voice as the living version of the light green pictogram approached from a room off to the side: Talc, a magical alien rock creature known as a golem, an extraterrestrial exile from far across the stars, with pale green calloused skin and curly green hair tied into a long ponytail, dressed in blue jeans and a green t-shirt like an everyday human man.
“Afternoon, Talc,” Mark replied. “How are things?”
“They’re fine,” Talc said simply. “Well, unless you count the corrupted golem alert goin’ off, I reckon that’s not quite as fine.”
“It is not,” agreed a woman standing in the doorway of the room, the living version of the dark blue pictogram: Hope, a former noble standing over nine-and-a-half feet tall, clad in an elegant dark blue sari with striking yellow trim that matched her nails and eyeliner.
“Hey, Hope. What kind of golem is it this time?”
“A chrome diopside,” she replied, handing him a photograph of a blurry green thing soaring over the treetops. “A geokinetic clinopyroxene sighted one mile outside of Beach City approximately forty minutes ago. We believe that she is Diopside. Our Diopside.”
“Emerald of the Mineral Team’s girlfriend, right?” Hope nodded. “Where’s Lilah?”
“Crow’s fittin’ her graduatin’ clothes. She’s mighty antsy considerin’ she’s gonna be an adult once the Sun goes down,” Talc replied. “And you know what we promised her would happen then.”
Mark nodded soberly. “Once the Sun goes down tonight, she’s a Crystal Gem, and she’ll fight for Earth with you three.” He sighed. “I just don’t want her to get hurt, y’know?”
“Neither do we, Mark,” Hope replied firmly. “She is our child too. Even if she wasn’t the last thing that we have of Tourmaline’s essence, we’d still do our best to protect her.” Mark nodded and headed down the hall to Crow’s room.
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“A little easy on the waist there, Crow! Oh, hey Dad.” A shirtless Lilah, a broad-shouldered girl just shy of Mark’s height with striking electric blue hair and eyes, made a pained smile to her father as the living version of the pink pictogram, wearing a lavender sweater, a pink skirt with a purple rhombus pattern, a nonbinary pride flag hairbow, and dark red boots tied a black skirt around her hips a little too hard.
The golem turned around, revealing hot pink eyes and black-painted lips. “Mark!” Crow...well, crowed, dropping the skirt string and flinging herself at him. “It’s been too long! It feels like the last time we saw you for more than five seconds was in April!”
“AP and final exams,” Mark apologized, returning the hug. “They happen every year.”
“Well, I’m glad you’re here, old pal. Someone needs to help us watch the kid while we go hunting.”
“The kid can hear you,” Lilah interjected. “And I’m not a kid anymore, I haven’t even legally been a kid since December!”
“That may be so, but you’re still not a Crystal Gem until sunset,” Crow replied, returning to her ward’s side to finish tying the skirt onto her. “And since today’s the solstice, that's not gonna be for a while yet.” Finished with the skirt, Crow stuck a hand into her wild, fluffy ponytail and started rummaging around, pulling out an empty tin of cookies, a live eastern gray squirrel, and a genuine 17th-century shamisen (“Wow, that was a fun party”) before retrieving a simple white button-down t-shirt with a left breast pocket that she quickly shoved over Lilah’s chest, nimble fingers with gray nails buttoning it up in a flash of pink. “There we go! Just what I needed to finish this up! You look cute, kid.”
“Hopefully cute enough to pick up a cutie someday,” the bluenette said approvingly, admiring herself in the mirror.
“Speaking of hopefully,” Crow said before sticking their head out the door and into the hallway. “Hope, do you want me to scout ahead on Diopside?” they called.
“That would be much appreciated, yes!” Hope called back.
“That’s my cue to leave. Go on, have a graduation or whatever. We’ll be back before you know it.” They gave the girl a brief noogie and left the room to the humans.
Mark sniffled. “My little girl’s growing up…your mother would be so proud of you.”
“You saw the sign again?” Lilah asked.
“Yeah.” He pulled his daughter close. “I wish you could’ve met her, Lilah. I wish she hadn’t been too sad to stay.”
Lilah swallowed. “I do too, Dad. I do too.”
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Talc was chopping some carrots when his right index finger fell off, causing the knife to slip out of his grip. “Darn.” He grabbed the waylaid digit and stuck it back on his hand, and it magically fused back on. Grabbing the knife, he resumed chopping.
“Talc?” Talc turned his head to see Lilah enter the kitchen.
“Oh, hello Lilah,” Talc replied cheerfully as he put down the knife. “You look mighty fancy today.”
“Yeah, I know. It’s simple, but…I like it. It makes me feel like a hot waitress. Speaking of waitresses, do you want me to help you with dinner?”
“Naw, I’m fine. Don’t wanna mess up your duds anyhow. But you can keep me company, I’d like that.” Lilah beamed and watched him get back to work.
A comfortable silence passed between them for some time while Talc made dinner until Lilah thought of something. “Talc?” she asked while something boiled in a steel pot.
“Yeah?”
“When I become a Crystal Gem, do you think I’ll finally get my powers? I’d love to be able to do cool stuff like you guys can. More than just magic passively making it so I never need a bath or get sick, I mean.”
“Aw, don’t worry, Lilah. Powers don’t make you a Crystal Gem. It’s what you’re willin’ to do even if ya don’t have no powers a’tall. An’ I’m not sure ya want my powers. Talcs may be hard to poof and able to regenerate from near anythin’, but our ability to fall apart at will is frankly kinda disturbin’.” As if on cue, his left hand fell off at the wrist. “See?” he asked as he picked it up and stuck it back on. “And I don’t think Hope’s psychics or Crow’s infinite-space hair are quite right fer ya.”
“Yeah, but…still, having tourmaline magic would be so COOL!” she shouted, pumping her fists while her eyes twinkled. “Mom could enhance things, right?”
“Yep, she sure could. Just like how you are enhancin’ my chores.” Lilah giggled, but her face fell once Talc’s back was turned to her. She pulled the chest of her shirt out and looked at the bare spot between her breasts, where a nexus would be if she was a golem and not a supposedly-magical human, and sighed in disappointment. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“Crow, do you see her?” Hope asked through her headset.
“I do indeed! Magical flying dinosaur at ten o’clock!” Crow replied. Hope watched on the control room screen through Crow’s eyes as the green thing swooped through the dense forest. She resembled a Triceratops prorsus, only far spikier, with six cruel eyes and two massive, batlike wings emerging from her shoulders. “Should I attempt to ground her?”
“Roger. She’s getting concerningly close to the farm. Take her down before she gets to Beach City.”
“Alright, Di, once you’re uncorrupted I hope you’ll forgive me for what I’m about to do.” Crow placed a hand over a small, twelve-sided lump on their chest underneath their blouse, which glowed a brilliant pink before materializing a pink-and-white-striped crossbow. Nocking an energy arrow, the rhodochrosite aimed it at Diopside’s left wing before firing it. It tore a hole through the membrane, the wound spraying a fluid that was a streaky mixture of a rusty orange and an opaque white. “Alright! Got her in one! Doesn’t seem like she can regenerate that either. She’ll fall to the ground and–”
Diopside, roaring in pain, caused a boulder to come out of the ground. She manipulated it into a half-pipe and used it to slide onto the ground. “Aw, come on! She just HAD to be the one chrome diopside to keep her geokinesis!” Crow whined. The corrupted golem roared and ran off, using the dirt and rock beneath her feet like an unusual surfboard. “What now?”
“Trail her,” Hope instructed. “Try to use your arrows to drive her into the ocean, her geokinesis is less effective on wet sand and useless on water. Don’t let her see you or else she might attack. Keep her as far away from Beach City as you can. When the time is right, call me and I will send Talc to tag in and beat her down.”
“Roger!”
Hope turned off the screen, removed her headset, and buried her face in her great blue hands. “This is not how today was supposed to go,” she grumbled. She heard a knocking at the control room’s door. “Come in.”
Lilah entered. “Hey, Hope…how’s the mission?”
“Well, Diopside has been grounded, which would be less concerning if she hadn’t retained her ability to move said ground.”
“...oh. Well…I was wondering…how do you use your diamond powers? Like, making a weapon and stuff? I didn’t ask Talc ‘cuz he doesn’t seem to do that…”
“It simply isn’t Talc’s style to fight with essence-born weapons. He can do it, but he prefers to fight with his own raw strength. As for me…well, I can tell you that it takes time and concentration to do it effectively; why, it took me the equivalent of 212 Earth years just to make my first spear alone. You need to feel it inside of you…you need to envision everything about it…then you call upon the desire to fight deep within you…”
Placing a hand near the top of the vertical white belt beneath her sari that went from her neck to her waist, the blue diamond pulled a long spear with a curved, pale pink blade and a dark blue handle out of her roughly rectangular nexus. “And there you have it.”
Lilah stared at the spear in awe before Hope willed it away in a puff of blue light. “Wow…I hope I can figure out how to do that.” She thought for a moment before shyly looking up at Hope. “Hope? Can you…tell me about Mom? Maybe if I knew how she was as a leader, I could figure out how to summon her weapon.”
“I have told you many stories about your mother, but if it helps you understand your potential abilities I can certainly tell them again,” Hope replied, patting her lap. Lilah sat on her knee and looked up at the taller woman, who tapped her chin pensively. “Let me see…ah, the story of how we met Gray Diamond. That was a good example of your mother’s leadership skills.”
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Five thousand and seventy-eight years earlier…
“Tourmaline, you’re not going to like this,” said Grape, a slender purple golemette with red-violet hair in a short bob, as she meekly handed a report to the leader of the Crystal Gems.
Tourmaline, a lanky, long-legged, pale blue-skinned golemette with a mohawk-like braid of cyan hair that went down to her butt, raised an eyebrow at the report. “Kindergarten activity? But that’s impossible. We destroyed the five sanctioned Earth kindergartens centuries ago, and none of them were on the south polar continent.”
“Then it appears that this one is unsanctioned,” said Pyrope, a dark red golemette with an almost square-shaped red afro, a silver sunglasses-like visor covering her eyes, and a stoic, almost monotonous demeanor coloring the way she spoke.
Tourmaline nodded. “How old is this data? I’d imagine a few Earth years given the signatures involved.”
“That’s the thing. The report is from this morning,” Grape said nervously.
The indicolite’s cyan eyes bulged out. “Th-this morning?! That’s not good. Pyrope, get a ship. Grape, get some troops. I want Ruby, Ben, Spinerva, the Malachite Twins, Rubellite, Ametrine, and as many ices, sapphires, aquamarines, lazurites, and pectolites that we can spare. We need to take out this kindergarten before Homeworld can exploit it.”
“Yes, ma’am!” Grape saluted before turning on her heel.
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Two hours later…
A green spaceship touched down in the would-be Larsemann Hills. Disembarking came Tourmaline; Pyrope; Grape; two teal golemettes with similar proportions to Crow and Grape; a limber pink golemette in a coral trench coat and hat with crimson hair in two large pigtails; a tall, pale blue-gray golemette with slender digits and an indigo golemor with similar proportions; a diminutive crimson golemor with a sour expression; four equally-small golemettes in indigo, dull green, papaya pink, and pale, ashy blue, the pale blue one wearing a star-shaped eyepatch over her right eye; five wide-eyed, ultramarine blue golemettes; a golemor resembling a masculine, red-toned version of Tourmaline; a short, stocky golemette with piebald purple-brown & yellow skin; a pale blue golemette with pointy cheeks; and eleven blue-skinned golemettes with spindly limbs & small noses, some of which had white hair instead of their race’s standard azure.
“Brrrr!” Ametrine, so nicknamed for her colorful complexion, shivered as the group approached a large hill riddled with numerous humanoid-shaped holes at its base, a large patch of unmarred rock dividing the holes into two separate groups. “It’s so cold! Why the vulkzara would Homeworld put a kindergarten here?”
“No humans,” Green Sapphire replied loftily. “There’s a circular oceanic current that keeps human boats from getting this far south. Given that most carved-ones turn against the Empire the moment they learn we’re not the only sapient species out there, it’s in the Authority’s best interests to keep them in the dark.”
“So they park the next kindergarten where no sane human would ever go,” Ruby finished with a scowl. “Anyone see anything?”
“There’s something over there,” one of the ices, Snow as shown by the pale blue snowflake embroidered on her white coat, said as she squinted at something in the distance. “It looks like a…recreational shore ball, of all things.” She walked over and brought it back to the others. It was an icosahedral black device floating in the middle of a shimmering clear bubble made of a strange sort of rubber.
“The heck is it?” Rubellite asked.
Tourmaline picked it up and turned it over, grimacing when she saw a retracted blade on the black thing’s underside. “It’s an injector,” she said grimly. “It’s got a protective force field that masks its magical signature, no wonder we didn’t detect them until now.”
“That’s an injector?” one of the lazurites, JJ-19 or “JJ” to her friends, said in disbelief. “But it’s so tiny. I could kick it.”
“Ah, but don’t let your eyes deceive you! That right there is the most modern piece of injector technology out there!” All eyes turned to see a ruby golemor, similar to Ruby save his maroon complexion and wider shoulders, appear from behind the hill, grinning smugly at them and with another such injector in his stubby hands.
“Maroon Ruby,” Tourmaline growled as the corundum arrogantly trotted over. “Yellow Diamond couldn’t be bothered to come here herself, so she sent her best stooge out instead?”
“Ah, you wound me, my dear enemy!” he said as he came to a stop in front of her and immediately started posturing. “I am on Special Assignment™ to test one of my little experiments. If it works, I get paid handsomely and your little rebellion ends.” He smiled wickedly at her. “Allow me to demonstrate the properties of my new Stealth Injectors.
“Magical barrier to prevent detection during transport.” He tapped the pole opposite the blade in a specific pattern, the spots where his fingers touched it lighting up orange and pink as he went. The barrier fell and the injector core fell roughly into his hands.
“Coded activation to prevent meddling from outsiders.” He pressed some buttons on the top of the little injector, which glowed yellow-green as he activated it.
“Enchanted boron carbide blade on collapsible proboscis to ensure rapid strikes with deep intrusion.” The blade shot out of the injector on an extendable tube, puncturing a hole into the rock behind him.
“Easy deposit of seed crystal.” The blade struck again, this time opening while inside the hole and dropping a little white thing no bigger than a marble inside of it. The blade retracted into the injector, which fell silent.
“And my own patented mixture of elbaite sweat and rose quartz tears to speed up growth!” The inside of the hole glowed before causing a shower of rock to explode out of the cliff. Tourmaline reflexively made a cyan bubble around herself to protect her from the blast. When the dust settled, another hole had been blown into the mountain, and stepping out of it was a human-sized golem resembling a skinnier Hope, only a dull dark gray in color and wearing the default gray-and-white uniform that all newmade golems wore.
The Crystal Gems gaped in horror as Maroon Ruby finished his spiel. “With Stealth Injectors I can make an entire army in a centirot. I’ve been covertly incubating a blue diamond worthy of Earth for the last five of its years, and since she’s due to emerge today I’ve decided to start on her court so we can really fight you off. And that measly graphite was just a demonstration. Her court will also need…”
“Ice!” Twenty ice golems appeared from the valley behind the hill, soon followed by...
“Xenotime!” Two amber brown golemettes with unusually large hands;
“Hematite!” Three black golemettes resembling taller corundums;
“Chromite!” A dark gray, freckled golemor resembling a larger, masculine Spinerva;
“Albite!” A white golemette with broad, pointy shoulders;
“Pyrite!” A strong-jawed golemor with metallic dark yellow skin;
“Rutile!” A very thin brownish-maroon golemette with deep wrinkles on her cheeks;
“White quartz!” A towering, stocky golemette with snow white skin & shaggy white hair;
“Brown zircon!” Four pumpkin spice brown golemettes with almond-shaped faces and more relaxed expressions compared to the other new emergees;
“Schorl!” Two black golems, one male and one female, with Tourmaline’s rough proportions if not having slightly shorter legs;
“Brown dravite!” Another tourmaline golemette, this one honey-brown and wearing a golden skirt, black-and-white high-heeled sandals, and a magenta cat’s-eye visor with matching nail polish;
“Grandidierite!” A slender seafoam green golemette;
“Almandine!” Three golemettes resembling dark purple Pyropes;
“And white corundum!” A golemette resembling a white sapphire rounded out the list.
Most of the new arrivals (sans the zircons, who, being born diplomats, were naturally quite mellow) glared at the horrified Crystal Gems, not noticing the somewhat crumbly texture of the rock from which they’d emerged. Suddenly, there was a loud Crack! from the hill behind them, and everyone turned to see a large gash emerge in the rock face between the previous exit holes. “And now for the grand finale!” Maroon Ruby declared. “I give you EARTH’S VERY OWN BLUE DIAMOND!”
KABOOM! went the rock, flowing out in a wave as a massive hole appeared in the side of the hill. Loose stone pelted the golems below, the Crystal Gems having the sense to pull up personal bubbles for protection. The new ones didn’t know to do this, so they ended up getting bruised in various places when the rocks hit them, but Maroon Ruby oddly seemed to get the worst of it somehow. When the commotion finally settled, everyone was left staring at a thirty-five-foot-one-inch-tall hole in the dead center of the hill…and listening to the footsteps within getting closer.
Walking out of the hole came a figure similar to Hope, only much skinnier, with a thinner, more pointed face and the proper height of a diamond. Then she stepped out of the hole and into the light, revealing that rather than the expected kind of sky blue that Maroon Ruby had said she’d be, she was instead a sort of grayish-blue like sealskin. Everyone stared at the newcomer, who blinked at them with large gray eyes. “Is there something wrong?” she asked, her voice surprisingly feathery and light given her stature.
“Yes, there IS,” Maroon Ruby glowered furiously. “How the Light-damned vulkzara did you end up off-color?!” He turned and pointed at the new tourmalines. “You there, tourmalines! You’re Kindergarten inspectors by caste, inspect it!”
“You deposited a blue diamond seed crystal here because this region is high in the boron needed to give a diamond a blue color, with the necessary carbon being sourced from local mineral deposits, carbon dioxide trapped in ice as bubbles, and assorted organic microorganisms living in the soil,” spoke the dravite in a nasally, nerdy voice as she adjusted her visor with a long-nailed index finger. “It would appear, however, that her nexus also incorporated significant amounts of hydrogen impurities as well, most likely sourced from the same ice used to source some of her carbon.”
“I meant the WHY she’s off-color, not the HOW!”
“From what little education I have received in my two decirots of life, I have learned that the likelihood of a diamond carved-one forming off-color is two thousand times higher than the mean likelihood of all other mineral races combined. Combined with the high speed of formation pushed by Stealth Injectors and the long time a diamond carved-one’s nexus typically takes to form, it is likely that the nexus was pushed through its formation faster than it could naturally self-correct.”
“In plain Saxsilla, please?” Maroon Ruby demanded.
“You made her too damn fast,” the male schorl said bluntly.
“Is that bad?” the new diamond asked, touching her bangs with her right hand nervously…a hand now revealed to only have three fingers, the ring finger and pinky being missing entirely and the rest of the hand being quite narrow as a result.
“Oh my luster! Your hand! It’s…HIDEOUS!” Maroon Ruby screamed. The new diamond hid her right hand with her left and looked ready to cry. “Fine. You know what? Maybe Stealth Injectors for a diamond aren’t such a good idea. Shatter this one and we’ll try again with a standard injector. Hopefully we’ll get some good ones before Yellow Diamond asks where I’ve been for the last five reevs…”
“Wait…shatter her?” the pyrite spoke up, horrified. “You want to…KILL her for being off-color?!” He turned to face the Crystal Gems. “Is this allowed?” he asked frantically.
“It’s Homeworld’s way,” Pyrope said bluntly. “Off-colors are seen by the Empire as aberrations to White Diamond’s quest to bring the Brilliant Light to the entire universe.”
“But…she’s our Diamond!” protested the chromite as he pointed to the worried-looking new diamond. “We’re meant to serve the Diamond of Earth, and that’s her!”
“You misunderstand,” Maroon Ruby growled. “You are not supposed to serve the first diamond that comes out of the dirt! You’re supposed to make a bunch of diamonds, then all the on-color diamonds of the same color fight each other in Diamond Duels, the one that wins them all gets to stay, and if the remaining ones of different colors want to duel, then they can do that. Either way, the last one standing is the one that you’re meant to serve. Normally it’s only then that you make a court, but we’re kind of in the middle of a civil war so I had to rush that too because, in case you’ve overlooked that part of the reports, WE’RE A LITTLE SHORT ON PERSONNEL!” he shouted.
“...what happens to those who lose Diamond Duels?” the albite asked nervously.
“They get shattered,” Grape said with a wince, causing the new diamond and her court to gasp in horror. “A diamond who can’t win a Duel is seen as a liability to the Empire’s strength. And the less you know about what they do with the remains…”
“Then we want no part in this empire,” the grandidierite said firmly. “Gray Diamond is our diamond, and we will defend her to our last breath.” The other new golems agreed loudly, and Gray Diamond looked much happier at this declaration of loyalty.
“You will do no such thing!” Maroon Ruby growled. “Yellow Diamond will have my nexus if I don’t give her good results!”
“And you won’t give her any results,” Tourmaline said, having snuck up behind him while he was distracted with his ranting. Her hexagonal nexus glowed cyan, and in a flash she pulled out a brown polearm with a curved cyan blade and sliced Maroon Ruby neatly down the middle with it. In a puff of smoke, he was reduced to a round-cut enchanted ruby that she quickly bubbled and teleported away. Looking up at Gray Diamond, she smiled as she dissipated her polearm. “There’s a lot you need to know about the Empire,” she said. “But I can tell you’ll do good things.”
“Yeah,” said Aquamarine, the gears audibly turning in her round-cheeked head. “Like the legal restrictions that you as Diamond of Earth can put on Homeworld…”
Tourmaline laughed nervously when the diamond’s hand caught her eye. “Oh…you know, we have a technician who can give you a prosthesis to make up for your missing fingers.”
“B-because it’s bad to be different?” Gray Diamond squeaked nervously.
“No, because having more fingers will improve your grip strength, and you’ll need a good grip on your weapon if you’re going to fight. You do wish to fight, do you not?”
Gray Diamond shifted her size downwards to match Tourmaline’s height. Grinning, she took the (much) older woman’s hand and shook it vigorously with her deformed one. “Of course! Although…” she added shyly, “will your group accept me like mine have?”
“‘A course we wills,” Spinerva said reassuringly in her anachronistic Empire City accent, waving her hands as she spoke. “Mah own diamond’s off-collah, an’ she’s wunna da ones who stahted dis whole shebang in da foist place. Don’t be a joik and beat up Hoimwoild and you’ll be a damn fine Crystal Gem, jus’ da same as alla ya coit.”
“Yeah, same here, same court, except I actually am an offie,” Ametrine added, showing herself to the new golems. “And if they can accept me, and all the other ones we’ve got, then they can accept you just as well.”
Gray Diamond looked to her court, who nodded, then turned back to face Tourmaline. “Then as my first action as Diamond of Earth, I pledge this planet in the name of the Crystal Gems!” Everyone around her applauded, but no one applauded louder than a very proud-looking Tourmaline.
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Present day
“As for Maroon Ruby, we did let him out eventually…in Egypt while a mastaba was being built,” Hope finished. “The minute he saw mankind he turned on Homeworld and gave us all of his technology free of charge, just as Green Sapphire said he would. Changed his ways too, he never wanted an off-color shattered again.” She sighed wistfully. “Gray was…a good friend. She was very kind and sweet, and she gave up using the caste system in her court without any fuss whatsoever the minute we asked her to do so. Her being the first corrupted golem we found…hurt, to say the least.”
Lilah nodded. “I wish I could’ve met her, Hope. Thanks for the story.” She left the room, sighing as she wandered back upstairs. She was no closer to figuring out how to summon her mother’s weapon. To figuring out what it really meant to be a Crystal Gem.
“Hey, Lilah?” Talc asked. “I got a call from Crow, they’re taggin’ out. Dinner’s done, just gotta let it cool first.”
“Hopefully you’re back before it cools all the way,” Lilah said. Talc nodded and left.
“Lilah?” Mark called from the dining room. “Can you help me set the table?”
“I’ll be right there!” Lilah called back.
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Crow returned home exhausted and sweaty. “Hoo boy,” they wheezed as they collapsed on the dark red armchair in the living room.
“Crow, would you mind wiping yourself off before you get manganese in the furniture again?” Mark asked sternly while Lilah helped him put the silverware and napkins on the dining room table.
“Yeah, yeah, I’m wiping,” Crow said dismissively with a wave of their hand. They retrieved a white towel from their hair and wiped their face on it, staining it pink in the process, before shoving it back into their hair. “Phew! What an evening, am I right?”
“Yeah…” Lilah trailed off. “Say, Crow?”
“Hmm?”
“You’ve got a ton of weapons in there, right? So you’d know how to summon them better than anyone.”
“We are NOT summoning weapons at the dinner table,” Mark interjected with a frown.
“Trust me, Mark, I’m not making that mistake a second time,” Crow said casually. “Kiddo, what’s gotten into you today? Even yesterday you weren’t this antsy. What gives?”
“Well…I still haven’t gotten my powers yet,” Lilah replied sullenly. “If my hair wasn’t blue you wouldn’t even be able to tell I have Mom’s essence within me. And yet…no tourmaline powers.”
“Oh, kid, don’t worry about it! It’s probably just an age thing. Natural-born golems don’t start developing their special abilities until they’re almost sexually mature; your hair didn’t start turning blue until you hit puberty, after all. You’re about the physical and mental equivalent of an injection-produced golem right now, so I’d say you should be getting your tourmaline powers in the next coming weeks.”
“I keep telling myself that,” Lilah grumbled, staring at her chest in annoyance. “Do you think my transition fucked up my development?”
“Kid, listen. I was a seamstress before the rebellion. The idea of me summoning a weapon was considered ludicrous on Homeworld. And yet, because I honed my willpower and creativity…” They pulled out a pink-and-white-striped broom out of their nexus. “...I can summon whatever I please. Just let it happen naturally and you’ll be fine,” they went on while dissipating the broom.
“And as for your gender stuff…maybe it did, maybe it didn’t. I don’t know. You’re literally only the second human made by magic, there’s a lot we don’t know about folks in your position. But I do know that transitioning made you happy in your own body, so trust me: a little delay in summoning weapons is worth your three extra years of gender euphoria.”
“And even if you never figure it out, you’ll still be as much of a Crystal Gem as the others,” Mark said reassuringly. “Because being a Crystal Gem isn’t about having powers, it’s about doing the right thing for other people.”
Lilah nodded. “Thanks, guys. I feel a little better now.” There was a knock at the door. “I’ll get it. Maybe it’s Talc.”
“If it is, then why didn’t he teleport in?” Mark muttered as she left.
“Who knows?” Crow shrugged. “I’ve lived with him for almost five millennia and I’m still finding new things about him.”
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Lilah slipped on a pair of black flip-flops and opened the door to see two girls her age, a chubby long-haired blonde with green eyes and a skinny Japanese girl with patchy red highlights in her hair, both of them wearing the reddish-orange cap and gown of Beach City High, on her doorstep. “O-oh! Molly, Saki! I wasn’t expecting you to be here!” Lilah stammered, flushing immediately.
“I told you we should’ve texted her,” the Japanese girl, Saki, hissed.
The blonde, Molly, lightly elbowed Saki in the gut. “The surprise was better. Anyway, hi Lilah! We noticed you weren’t at graduation.”
“W-well, yeah, I’m kinda not allowed to go to public school anymore,” Lilah murmured.
“We know. So we brought you a little something! Saki, you have the pot, right?”
“Pot?” Lilah’s brow furrowed. “You guys know how strict our drug policy is, right?”
“FLOWERpot, Blue,” Saki corrected, lifting her hands to reveal a small red flowerpot with orange poppies in it. “We snuck it here from school so you could have a graduation present. It’s not much, but…”
“We thought it was wrong that the school board kicked you out of the district after fifth grade,” Molly finished. “Seriously, what kind of justification is ‘your mother is an alien and therefore you’re not technically an Appalachian citizen’?”
Lilah took the flowerpot and smiled. “Thanks, guys. It’s lovely. I don’t want to keep you from the ceremony.”
“The ceremony ended two hours ago, Lilah,” Saki said.
“Wait, really?”
“Uh…yeah? Our graduating class was literally twenty people?”
“Oh, right. I keep forgetting how tiny our town is.”
Suddenly, they heard a deep rumbling noise from below. “Uh…what’s that?” Molly asked with a gulp. Bursting out of the dirt a few feet from the barn came Diopside. She was covered in nicks and scratches, and both wings were visibly mangled. She roared, slit pupils narrowing.
“Get inside,” Lilah ordered.
“Don’t have to tell ME twice!” Saki yelped as the other girls ran into her house.
Lilah set the flowerpot on the dining room table (“What?” Mark asked in surprise when he saw the flowerpot) and ran to Crow. “Crow, Diopside’s here!”
“WHAT?!” Crow tumbled off the chair and to their feet. “How?!”
“I’m sorry!” That was Talc rushing upstairs from the back room. “She went underground and I lost her signal!”
“And our systems decided that NOW was a good time to update,” Hope glowered as she stormed up the steps behind him. “Turrets and arms are offline. I’ll set up a barrier to keep the humans safe. Talc, Crow, draw Diopside away and give her all you’ve got!”
“Can do!” Talc said as he and Crow ran outside.
“What about me?” Lilah asked.
“You can inspect the barrier for cracks in case Diopside has the sense to attack it.”
Lilah frowned, but only for a moment. It wasn’t the glamorous job of fighting the corrupted golem, but it was just as important for her father’s and friends’ safeties. “Okay. I can do that.”
Hope nodded and started singing in the native golem language, causing a dark blue translucent shell to grow around the house. Molly and Saki exchanged a confused look. “I swear I’ve heard that before,” Molly said as she tried to place the tune. “Wait…is your diamond mom singing the Camp Pining Hearts theme song in alien language?!” she asked incredulously.
“She’s a fangirl,” Lilah shrugged. “And it works. The show’s all about emotional barriers, right?”
“I mean, yeah, but…” Molly shook her head. “Oh, it doesn’t matter.”
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Outside, Crow summoned a double-bladed axe with long, narrow blades, equally as pink as their other weapons. Talc, meanwhile, summoned a pair of gauntlets the same shade of dark red as his shoes. Crow raised an eyebrow at this. “You’re armoring up?”
“I failed to get Diopside poofed before she came stompin’ around here,” Talc replied firmly. “I’m not takin’ a chance a’ her escapin’ again.”
“Fair enough. HEY, DIOPSIDE! OVER HERE! YOUR FIGHT’S WITH US, NOT THE BARN!”
Diopside, who at that moment had been poised to ram into the front wall, turned around. Her sextet of slit pupils narrowed and she roared at them. “That’s right! Over here!” Talc yelled, slamming his fists together. “Come and get some!”
Diopside pawed at the ground and raced at him, intending to ram him. Talc jumped out of the way. She rotated the ground beneath her feet with her powers and rammed into him without losing momentum. Talc caught her horns with his hands and dug his feet into the dirt, wincing as the strain on his joints increased. Diopside eventually ran out of steam, allowing Talc to twist at her head hard enough to snap off her right brow horn. Rustwhite blood leaked from the wound until Diopside’s nexus glowed light green followed by the wound, the lost adornment regenerating in a flash of light within seconds.
“Go for the horns!” Talc ordered as he tossed the broken horn away. “She’ll tire herself out remakin’ ‘em!”
“Works for me! TIME TO POLL OUR CLIENT!” Crow hollered, jumping high into the air and cleaving off the remade horn with their axe.
“Crow, fewer puns and more focus!” Hope called from inside the barn.
“Hey, I don’t see YOU out here– OOF!” Diopside had swung her tail at them, knocking them over. “Oh, you’ve got my skirt dirty! YOU ARE POOFED, YA HEAR ME?! POOFED!”
“Their magic will clean it up in minutes,” Lilah muttered.
“I find that in situations like this Crow just shouts for the sake of shouting,” Hope replied as Crow, Talc, and Diopside tussled. Suddenly, thunder boomed, lightning flashed, and it started to rain heavily. “Shit.”
“At least the water will make it harder for Diopside to bend the dirt…right?” Mark asked.
“Well, with that many injuries she’ll at least have a hard time focusing,” Lilah muttered.
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Indeed, Diopside shrieked and writhed in pain as the water pelted her open wounds. Eventually, her common sense returned for a bit and she used her geokinesis to erect a protective roof of dirt over herself. Or tried to, at least; the wet dirt was slack under her telekinetic grip. Eventually, with a far bigger tug than intended, Diopside lifted a large chunk of earth out of the ground…exposing a Stealth Injector embedded in the dirt. “How the hell did that get in there?” Crow asked.
“Musta landed here durin’ the war and got swallowed by the swamp that used to be here,” Talc replied. “Don’t think we should worry about it none, batteries’ll be dead by now.”
“Right,” Crow nodded. “Stealth Injectors trade capacity & capacitance for speed. A full-sized clunker can last for 350 years, but these things die after ten.”
It was at that exact moment that the injector was hit by a random bolt of lightning (which also passed through Diopside, causing her to drop the dirt and shriek in pain). It lit up, reenergized, and fell out of the dirt, landing button-first on numerous stray rocks kicked up during the fight in sequence and rolling down to the poison ivy field. It lit up, the blade shot out, and something was buried into the soil. The poison ivy began to wither and crumble, and the soil below started turning ashy and gray before frosting over.
“...okay, nevermind, maybe we should worry about it,” Talc said, his jaw slack with disbelief.
“Of ALL the shitty coincidences that could’ve happened today!” Crow seethed. “WHY?!” they raged at the rainclouds above them.
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��What…what’s happening over there?” Molly asked.
“Diopside unearthed an injector, and that freak bolt of lightning recharged it,” Lilah replied uneasily. “Can they do that?”
“Well, yes, it is possible to recharge an injector’s batteries through large electric shocks, but lightning has too high a wattage for that to be practical!” Hope replied frantically. “I don’t understand it, that injector should’ve melted from a current that size!”
“Injectors?” Molly asked. “Is that what that virus-looking thing was?”
“Injectors are how golems are cloned, they’re full of seed crystals made of…I think it’s something with silicon in it?” Mark guessed.
“Silicone infused with magic, yes,” Hope nodded.
“Yeah, and they get soaked in the blood of the golem you want to make, then they’re zapped with electricity & magic and shoved into the dirt. Over several years the seed crystals grab the elements needed to make the target mineral and build gemstone shells around themselves.”
“The resulting constructs are magical gemstones called ‘nexuses’, and once a nexus is complete it forms a golem with the nexus inside the chest,” Hope continued, tapping the bump between her sizeable breasts where a human’s heart would’ve been. “It’s what gives us our fantastic powers, it’s what stores the essence that makes us who we are…and it’s what remains of us if we are too badly hurt until we repair ourselves from within the safety of its extrauniversal interior.”
“I’ve told you all this shit before, guys,” Lilah remarked.
“It’s been a while!” Saki protested. “So the ground’s crumbling because the magic rock that virus-looking doodad stuck in it is…eating it?”
“To some extent. We do not know who the donor was for the blood in that injector,” Hope replied, watching uneasily as Talc and Crow engaged Diopside again. “But we do know that injection consumes a considerable amount of energy to create the phylacters – magic atoms – in our bodies, energy that the nexus takes from the chemical bonds of the surrounding material, rendering it cold and inert.”
“Including anything that’s alive,” Molly gasped in horrified realization. “Is that why you started that war you were in? To stop your empire from doing what happened to that tangle…to the entire Earth?!”
“Partly. The other reason involved finding out that our entire oppressive society was built on the lies of a single madwoman.” Hope looked outside and saw Talc snatch the injector from the ground. “Talc! Shut that thing off before it injects again!” she called. “We don’t want to lose the entire farm!”
Talc pried the back of the injector open with his bare hands while pushing Diopside’s face away with his foot. “We’re in luck!” he called back. “The injector only had the one crystal, and the lightnin’ fried the battery! It only had enough juice for one go!”
“Good!” Crow said, pausing momentarily to wring out their hair. “Now the humans will only have to worry about some inverse radiation!”
“...radiation?!” Molly squawked.
“Cloning with injectors takes a lot of energy,” Lilah explained. “So much that even after the golem’s emerged, the spot they came from keeps sucking energy in until everything’s balanced. Especially true of Stealth Injectors since they need so much energy to make golems come out in minutes instead of decades.” With a scowl she added “And that’s why it’s such an evil way to reproduce. It doesn’t just kill the things living in the soil on top of the nexus, it kills everything within range unless it’s magical. Which amounts to only golems.”
“Uh…guys?” Saki asked. “That giant green space ceratopsid…is it doing something?” Everyone turned to see Diopside curiously testing the dirt with her powers. Thanks to the injection the energy once keeping the rainwater liquid was now being drained into the new golem, and the muddy dirt was subsequently freezing into thick, black ice even fifty feet away from the injection site where Talc, Crow, and Diopside currently stood.
Diopside seemed to smirk. As it was solid and had a repetitive molecular structure, ice was therefore a mineral. And with that many dirt inclusions, lifting it would be no trouble at all. She turned her head, formed the snirt into a rectangular pillar, and slammed it into Talc’s chest. His head came off, bouncing on the dirt for a bit before stopping. “Ow,” Talc groaned, still very much alive. His headless body fumbled and flailed for his head. “Over here, goshdarnit!” he barked at it.
Paying him no mind, Diopside turned her attention to Crow, whom she began to pelt with a flechette of dirty icicles. Crow dodged momentarily, but slipped on a patch of muddy ice and fell, landing hard on their right knee with a sickening CRACK! and an agonized cry. Then Diopside turned to the barn and summoned a great bevy of pillars toward the barrier, cracking it and forcing Hope to sing again to undo the damage.
As she pointed out where Hope needed to sing to repair the barrier, Lilah swallowed. Crow was out of the fight until their knee healed, and Talc was out until he could reattach his head – not an easy task when the ground was that slick. Hope couldn’t fight Diopside; she had to keep the barrier up to protect the humans inside, and Lilah knew her aunt enough to know that Hope had trouble multitasking. And her dad, strong though he could be, was no match for a geokinetic alien dinosaur capable of flight, especially when the Gempire’s Smallest Kindergarten™ was so close by.
She knew what she had to do. “I’m going after her,” she said, marching towards the open doorway.
“WHAT?!” Mark cried, reaching out to grab her but failing.
“Blue, this is nuts! You can’t do this!” Saki protested.
“I have to! We’re out of other options! And technically, I’m already a Crystal Gem. We all agreed I’d be one when the Sun went down…well, the Sun’s covered by clouds, so it’s technically ‘down’ in the sense that it’s not usable right now.” She held her head high and tried to ignore the frightened look in Hope’s face…and the twisting feeling in her intestines. “I have to do this. I may not have powers, but I need to do something.”
And it was at that very moment that two somethings happened. First, glowing cyan lines traced over a spot on Lilah’s chest, forming the outline of an intricate hexagonally-cut gemstone before bursting into light, a polearm identical to the one Tourmaline once wielded clattering onto the porch.
Next, the dirt of the poison ivy patch, now completely bare and gray and icy, suddenly burst upwards in a messy SPLURT!, kicking up a tall plume of frigid grayish-brown dust. When the plume settled, a pale orange right hand shot out of the hole left behind, extending on a long, ribbonlike arm before slamming hard onto the remaining part of the ground. The other hand on an equally-rubbery left arm shot out and landed, then two bare feet on equally-elastic legs emerged as well.
Pulling herself out of the hole on all fours, then skittering headfirst up to the front door before flipping herself upright, was a pale orange-skinned golem wearing the default uniform of the Mohs-8 caste. She had a chin-length bob of safety orange hair and blinked at the world with large, equally-orangine eyes, taking in the shocked Lilah, the shocked golems, the unattended polearm, and Diopside slamming another wave of dirty ice into the barrier while Hope was distracted. And then she said her very first words:
“Did I miss something?”
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“Uh…” Lilah wracked her brain. Fighting a corrupted golem was one thing, she expected that by now. But meeting a new golem that wasn’t one of her guardians? “Well…” she started as she looked around before noticing the sturdy metal poles supporting the roof of the porch. Her eyes wandered over to the newcomer. Elastic limbs, thin neck, and large eyes; a true spinel like Spinerva, only orange instead of pink. Then she saw the polearm on the ground. Her mother’s. “Actually…you can help me with something.”
“Sure thing, what needs doing?” the spinel asked.
“Well, you see that giant monster over there?” Lilah asked, pointing at Diopside, who was now chasing after Talc’s headless body. “We need to poof her before she causes any trouble, but we’re kind of stuck at the moment.”
“Well, then it’s time that you got unstuck. How can I help?”
“I need to get this polearm into her so she’ll poof, but I’m not strong enough to engage her directly. Luckily, if this works I won’t need to get up close and personal. Can you tie your legs around these poles so you’re facing away from me?”
“Sure thing!” The spinel stretched a leg over to one post and wrapped it around, then did the same for the other so that her slender back faced Lilah. “Now what?”
“Pick up that polearm on the ground.”
“If that’s a polearm, is there a poleleg too?” the spinel pondered as she picked up the weapon with elastic hands.
“Uh…we’ll check on that later.”
“Lilah, do you need me to make some noise?” Crow asked.
“Yeah! Noise will work! I’m gonna need a straight shot at Diopside!” Lilah agreed, grabbing the spinel by the waist and walking backwards into the house.
“Kid, this is incredibly crazy and we’ll have to have a long talk about this afterwards, but right now I am completely within the moment! HEY, DIOPSIDE! OVER HERE! I FUCKED YOUR MOM! OR I WOULDA, IF YOU WEREN’T BORN FROM AN INJECTOR! NO, YOU KNOW WHAT? I FUCKED YOUR BLOOD DONOR! SO THERE!”
Diopside’s attention left Talc and fell on Crow once more. She roared and tried to send more ice towards Crow, but failed to move her projectiles more than a foot. Even with the spinel’s emergence draining heat from the soil, the early summer heat had started to warm it back up again, enough so that the ice had somewhat softened – making it difficult for Diopside to wield once more. “Not so tough without your cheats, are ya?” Crow taunted further before grabbing their knee and groaning in pain. “Ow, ow, don’t like that, don’t like that at all.”
Diopside charged and tossed Crow into the air with her horns. “When I let go, wait until I say ‘now’ to release the polearm!” Lilah told the spinel. She pulled further back and exhaled, then let go.
The spinel shot forward like the living slingshot she was. When the spinel’s hips moved in front of her knees, Lilah barked “NOW!” and the spinel let go of the polearm. It went sailing through the air like a ballista bolt and plunged into Diopside’s neck, emerging from the other side in a burst of rustwhite blood. With a choke and a splutter, Diopside exploded into a puff of white smoke, disappearing completely save for her nexus: grass green, circular step-cut with one row of facets on the crown beneath the heptagonal table, and about the size of a four-ounce tub of Vaseline.
Talc’s body caught Crow before they could hit the ground. “Nice catch!” Crow complimented. Talc’s body set them down and they grabbed Diopside’s nexus, summoning a small pink bubble around it. “Hot diggety damn, Tourmaline’s polearm! I haven’t seen that since…well. Nice shot, kid! You too, newbie!”
“Is that my name?” the spinel asked Lilah as the latter let go of her.
“Nope, we’re giving you something better than that,” Lilah replied while the spinel removed her legs from the posts. Spotting the flowerpot on the dining room table, she smiled. “And I think I know just the name.”
“Can someone help me get my head back on?” Talc asked from somewhere unseen.
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“To Lilah and Poppy, the newest Crystal Gems!” Glasses of water clinked together ironically. Talc was back in one piece, Diopside’s nexus was safely stored in the vault below the barn, and Saki and Molly had decided to stay the night while the storm passed…and until the “inverse radiation” in Poppy’s exit hole sucking the life from its surroundings could be dealt with.
“Today’s been so full of orange!” Molly giggled after dinner was finished. “Our caps and gowns were orange, our school is orange, the flowers were orange, the new magical rock alien is orange; heck, even your nails are orange!”
“That was deliberate!” Lilah laughed as she inspected her fingernails, which were painted the same slightly-reddish-orange of the flowers and Poppy’s hair. “I figured if I couldn’t go to graduation the least I could do was to wear the school’s color.”
“You kidding?” Saki chuckled. “If I knew what today was going to be like I woulda skipped graduation entirely.”
“But then you wouldn’t’ve gotten me flowers. Admit it, Saki; you’re a sap.”
“I-I am not!” Saki blushed. “A-and anyway! Where’s the newbie anyway?”
“Here she is!” Crow declared, emerging from the basement stairway with a flourish. “Presenting Poppy in her own ‘do!”
Poppy bounced into the room, her uniform gone. In its place was a solid vermillion yinzi eingyi blouse, a longyi skirt with a checked pale orange-and-white pattern, the white diamonds each having a little dot in their middles like an eye, and simple dark brown flip-flops the same shade as the nail polish on her fingers and toes, copper rings gracing the second & fourth digit of each hand and foot just as similar steel rings did on Lilah’s and Hope’s. “How do I look?” she asked cheerfully.
“You look adorable! Like a proper little businesswoman who could also kill you,” Lilah giggled. “Excellent work as always, Crow!”
“If it’s not excellent, I didn’t make it!” Crow laughed. “Now let’s get you introduced to everyone. This is Mark, you took care of his poison ivy problem…”
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Sometime later that night, Hope knelt in front of a great stone coffin bearing a carved visage of Tourmaline on its top. “She’s a Crystal Gem now, just like you,” Hope said. “I wish…” She sniffled. “I just w-wish y-you could’ve s-seen her f-first v-victory…”
“Hope?” Talc suddenly appeared and knelt next to her. “You okay?”
“Just…sharing the news,” Hope replied as she wiped her eyes. “Talc, I’m so worried.”
“Yeah, the inverse radiation bugs me too. We got a way to fix that?”
“Yes, the Sun-Sucker’s finished now, but…oh, confound it! Talc, I’m worried that Lilah’s going to get hurt. I’m worried that she’s going to end up walking her mother’s path and blame herself for not being able to save everyone. A-and then…”
Talc put a hand on her right shoulder. “She won’t,” he said firmly. “We’ll make sure she won’t. She ain’t goin’ down that path now that we know what steps led her mom there.”
Hope exhaled as he removed his hand. “I-I know, but…and that’s just what we can do, Talc. I’m worried about something else. Something that we can’t do anything about.”
“What worries you?”
“Diopside. She was the 31,500th corrupted golem we’ve found.”
“That number a bad omen on your planet?”
“No, but it might as well be a bad omen on this one. The number of golems stranded on Earth before White Diamond sang the Corruption Song wasn’t that much more. And at the accelerated rate they’ve been emerging after Tourmaline…” she stared at the coffin before continuing, “we might find the last one within the year.”
“And we don’t have a cure for that still,” Talc finished with a sigh. “Bugs me too.”
“That wasn’t my only concern, Talc. Think about it: White Diamond couldn’t send personnel directly to Earth during the war, not when we were so good at convincing her people to turn on her. So she turned most of us into monsters so that we could not give up the sheep about her lies.”
“Goat.”
“Whatever. The point is, now that most of us are devoid of sapience almost none of us could expose her. And we remaining few have spent the last five millennia rounding all the others up, every Crystal Gem and Homeworld troop that she marooned on Earth prior to the Corruption. All into one place. Do you see what my concern is now?”
Talc’s brows furrowed. “I’m havin’ some trouble…d’you think that someone will try to destroy us all once we’re all together?”
“Yes. I’m afraid that Homeworld will return once we’ve done White Diamond’s dirty work of rounding up the remaining Crystal Gems, and potential Homeworld deserters, for her, a-and then…” She trembled. Talc didn’t need to be told what would happen next.
“Easy now, Hope,” Talc replied in a soothing voice as he watched her cry silently. “White Diamond left us alone after the Corruption, we’ve been lookin’ around for years and we never saw no sign a’ her drones or spaceships. And if she does come back, well, then we’ll finish her off right then and there. Just like we promised we would.”
Hope exhaled shakily. “I would be happier if she was able to see that.” Talc didn’t ask who “she” was and simply sat with her, letting the much larger alien lean her big blue head on his much tinier shoulders. “I would be much happier if she could see what kind of woman her daughter was becoming.”
Neither one noticed Lilah peeking her head into her mother’s shrine while their backs were turned, having heard the tail end of their conversation. Frowning again at the spot on her chest, she left the mourners in silence.
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kosmos2999 · 5 months
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Star Trek: The Animted Series 50th Anniversary Episode Review
Episode: Mudd's Passion
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Season: 1
Episode: 10
Stardate: 4978.5
Original airdate: November 10, 1973
Written by: Stephen Kandel
Directed by: Hal Sutherland
Music by: Yvette Blais and Jeff Michaels
Executive producers: Lou Scheimer and Norm Prescott
Studio: Filmation Associates
Network: NBC
Series created by: Gene Roddenberry
Cast:
Captain James T. Kirk (voice by William Shatner)
Mr. Spock (voice by Leonard Nimoy)
Dr. Leonard “Bones” McCoy (voice by DeForest Kelly)
Ursunoid Female Miner (voice by Nichelle Nichols)
Lt. Hikaru Sulu (voice by George Takei)
Eng. Montgomery Scott, Arex, Human Miner, Ursunoid Male Miner (voices by James Doohan)
Nurse Christine Chapel, Lora, M'Ress (voice by Majel Barrett)
Guest star:
Roger C. Carmel as Harry Mudd
Synopsis:
The USS Enterprise enters the Arcadia Star System in a mission to seek for the interstellar con artist, Harcourt Fenton Mudd. As the ship approaches the planet Motherlode, Mr. Spock reports to the Captain Kirk that the probabilty of finding “an old friend”, Harry Mudd there is very high.
As Kirk and Spock are beamed down to the planet's surface, they found Mudd selling crystals he claim that work as a liquid love potion to a group of heavy metal miners. Kirk tells Mudd that he is under arrest for fraud, illegal drug manufacture and swindling. Mudd refuses to give up because Motherlode doesn't recognize Federation law.
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To deceive the miners into buying the “love crystals” from him, Mudd gets the help of a lizard-lake alien. A Rigelian Hypnoid, who has a hypnotic ability to make believe that she is a woman in love with Harry Mudd. Spock uses his phaser to reveal the true nature of the creature. To escape the angry mob of the planet's miners, Mudd gives up to Kirk and Spock uses his phaser again to dig a trench as a barrier while they were beamed up to the ship again.
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Once Harry Mudd is beamed up to the Enterprise and while he is receiving medical treatment from Nurse Christine Chapel, he told Kirk how he escaped from the android planet they met the last time (happened in The Original Series episode, “I, Mudd).
After Mudd watched the interaction between Spock and the nurse, he decided to take advantage of Chapel's feelings as part of his escape plan. Mudd claims to Chapel that the liquid from the crystals brings strong friendship between two members of the same sex and romantic love between two members of opposite sexes. He offered Christine some of his “love potion crystals” for her to test on herself rather than a laboratory.
As the nurse opened the brig to receive the crystals and almost fall fainted by the reaction of the “love potion”, Harry got the chance to steal Chapel's ID card and the device to open himself the brig. Then Christine went to Mr. Spock's office to give the medical report on Harry Mudd. She tried to approach Spock in a lovely fashion, but he doesn't respond to her kindness the way she wanted.
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While on the bridge, the captain gives orders to set course to a desert planet on a exploratory mission.
Mudd takes the escape route from the brig to a computer center where he made changes to Chapel's ID card. And when he was ready to went to the shuttlebay, the nurse intercepts him, to complain about the crystals of love. On the melee, Mudd take Chapel captive and both took a shuttle to the desert planet and some of those crystals fell thru the air conduct system.
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On the bridge, everybody is amazed at Spock's reacton to the kidnap of the nurse Chapel. It seems that the “love potion” works. Kirk and Spock went to the transporter room to rescue Christine on the planet. As soon as the vaporized liquid of the potion runs thru the conducts, everyone of the ship's crew began to feel its effects. Even Kirk take a breath of that vapor.
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In the planet's surface, Mudd and Chapel had a surprise encounter with a rock monster. Kirk and Spock intercepted Mudd and together tried to fight the monster but their best efforts with their phasers are made in vain. And then, another rock monster appeared.
Kirk had an idea, to give the potion crystals to one of the monsters. After a moment of hesitation, Mudd gave the crystals to the captain and he throws them to one of the rock monsters to be swallowed by. It seems it works, one of the monsters is fighting with the other, in that moment, the group takes the chance to escape from the planet by beamed up to the Enterprise.
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Back into the ship and under the influence of the potion, Mudd confesses most of his recent felonies. Spock offers his help to the nurse but she refuses. It seems to be that a side effect of the potion is a moment of hate after a moment of love. Harry Mudd has to be sent to a rehabilitation center.
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Fascinating Facts:
This is the third story of Harry Mudd in the Star Trek universe. The other two were in The Original Series episodes, “Mudd's Women” and “I, Mudd”. From the first and second season respectively. All those Mudd's stories are written Stephen Kandel.
This is the third time a relationship between Spock and Chapel is established. The first time, it was in the first season episode, “The Naked Time” and the second time in the third season episode “Plato's Stepchildren”.
Along with Mark Lenard as Sarek and Stanley Adams as Cyrano Jones, Roger C. Carmel were the only three guest star roles who both performed their characters in both the original and the animated series.
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glitterdustcyclops · 7 months
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Ten Fave Characters from Ten Fandoms
I started this post years ago and gave up halfway through, but I thought it would be interesting to revisit it. To see if my thoughts had changed since then, and to add in some new fandoms I've been into. The thing is, I've always struggled to pick my Single Favorite Character in any given media, because I am a total sucker for a good ensemble cast, and most of the time I'm more interested in the dynamics of the different relationships between characters than I am in the individual characters themselves. But you know, I do still have my blorbos, same as everyone else. So here are ten of them, from ten different fandoms, in no particular order (with a general warning that there will be spoilers):
1. Steven (Steven universe)
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My son, my muffin, light of my life, best boy!! Honestly, how could I not put him first? Steven Universe is and always will be It™ for me, My Thing, and I could probably write essays for days (and in fact, I have) about the themes, characters, story arcs, design, music, everything to do with this fucking show. And while I love literally everyone in Beach City to bits, you know I gotta give a special shout out to our boy Steven. Watching him grow up over the years was a genuine delight, and the conclusion of his arc being a pretty obvious transgender acceptance allegory at the exact same time I was coming to accept my own trans identity was an extra special treat on top. It will never stop blowing my socks clean off just how revolutionary a character like Steven was at the time (and shamefully, continues to be), especially in media aimed at young kids. A boy hero whose strength and power comes from his empathy, from his kindness, from the women in his life. He is literally surrounded by a team of powerful alien warrior women, descended from the Princess of Alien Space Rock Royalty, and never once does the narrative even slightly question the fact that he idolizes the women in his life. Steven fights with a rose-colored shield and loves singing and laughing and his big sisters and love, and his whole arc was about learning how to take these feminine influences and come into his own power with them, to be the kind of hero he wanted to be. At the end of the day, no matter what else Steven was, he was above all himself. And he was loved for it, completely, unreservedly, without question. How fucking magical is that? (And thank god we finally got him some therapy, this poor lil muffin).
2. Donna Noble (Doctor Who)
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Best companion 5ever, fite me. I love Donna for so many reasons, but most of all I love her relationship with Ten, which is easily one of my top five brotps of all time. She challenged him and snarked at him and dared him to be better, and he tried his hardest to do it, because he wanted to be worthy of her companionship. And they were just so good together!!! Ahhh!!!!! Donna Noble was introduced as a rather abrasive figure, loud and sarcastic without apology in a way female characters frequently aren’t allowed to be, especially in the dark times of the late 2000s. But she was also shown to be really deeply kind, overflowing with empathy for all of the people and creatures around her. And not only that, but she was quite literally the Most Important Woman in the Universe because of it. Your faves could simply never, I’m sorry. Ten + Donna will forever be my ultimate fav season, my fav companion, my favorite everything of Doctor Who forever and always. (Also David Tennant & Catherine Tate’s irl chemistry is the best, they are just so good whenever they’re together on screen.)
3. Iron Bull (Dragon Age Inquisition)
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It is almost impossible for me to pick my favorite character from Dragon Age more than any other series because I really do love them all too much. I mean, Hawke, my disaster bisexual? Fenris, my moody little porcupine? Dorian? Sera? Leliana? VARRIC?!?! To me one of the defining features of Dragon Age are its excellent ensemble casts. The fascinating dynamics between all these messed up weirdos trying their best to save the world. But if I had to pick one guy, the one who definitely surprised me with how absolutely head-over-heels in love I fell with him, well then I have to give it up to the Big Man himself, our beloved Iron Bull. I remember when it was first announced we were getting a Qunari love interest, and not only was he a Big McLarge Huge Warrior Guy, he was pansexual. I was braced for a walking punchline, leering and making jokes and flirting with everyone in a really crass way (not that there’s anything wrong with that, just you know, it’s been done before). But what I got instead was a burnt-out professional liar with a determined love for softness, for pleasure. Bull is an incisively intelligent and brutally calculating man who is willing to turn his back on his country and everything he's ever known, to become an outcast, just to stick up for the people he loves the most. Dude's got layers. He loves dawnstone because it's pretty and pink, he totally gets off on fighting dragons, he calls Vivienne ma'am and plays mindchess with Solas in his spare time. And obviously, of course, him being a loving dom who gives you a place to be something other than the literal Herald of Andraste was just the icing and sprinkles on top of this already delicious slice of beefcake.
4. Izzy Hands (Our Flag Means Death)
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Oh boy. Hoo boy. Okay. We're getting into it now. Sometimes you just see an absolute miserable little rat bastard of a man and go "yes, that one, that one's mine thank you." While I love Stede for Gender Reasons and I love Ed because he's literally perfect, and the tender sweetness of Jim + Olu melt my heart into a pool of butter, and everyone else in the cast is absolutely spectacular, down to the guest roles, there's just something about Izzy. It’s undeniable. We love a complicated character round these parts, naturally, but also, how could you not be obsessed with one so singularly pathetic and yearning and just absolutely begging to be stepped on as Izzy motherfucking Hands. Just. His whole deal?? Imagine being so fucking married to the fictionalized persona you helped create of the man you've decided to devote your entire life to. Imagine knowing that the crumbs of affection you accept from him are the most that you could ever hope to get, because you and he just aren't made for anything else, you are Hard Men and this is a Violent, Terrible world. Until, suddenly, in walks this fucking prissy little nonce with no skills and all of the privilege, who by all rights should have been shot dead the second he set foot in Nassau, and somehow this fucking idiot manages to utterly bewitch your husband god Captain?? Who, it turns out, actually did want all of that lovely sweet softness you told yourself was Forbidden, For Reasons, and he is actually perfectly capable of showing warmth and devotion and care for someone, just not You. No, instead you are fated to watch your Captain and This Fucking Idiot fall in love, right in front of your face, and the rest of his floating insane asylum treat you like you're the bad guy here. Like, bitch, I would probably want to stab someone about that too!! (And that's not even getting into the Toe Thing, which. Jesus Christ. The Toe Thing). Also, he has the privilege of being portrayed by Con O'Neil, who I have the most atrocious of crushes on, so really, how could I not pick him?
5. Flint (Black Sails)
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Speaking of Messed Up Gay Pirates. I know we can all relate to someone being so fundamentally angry about homophobia that he decides to declare war on all of Britain about it, right? No, but for real, James Flint McGraw’s entire arc, from earnest do-good Homosexual with politically radical beliefs to vengeful ginger murder-pirate to tired old man who gets to retire to a lifetime of gentle lovemaking with his recently-unburied Husband was something I never expected, but was utterly delighted by nonetheless. There is just so much seething rage burning under the surface of this man, that constant war between his tenderness, his capacity for love and care that was so cruelly ripped from him by such a corrupt system, and then his yearning for violence and vengeance. And, on top of that, the ways he relates to the women of the show; his entire co-dependant Thing with Miranda, which is so queer it’s almost beyond definition in the best way, and his Tired Gay Dad routine with Eleanor, and to a lesser extent, Madi. Plus, he’s damaged and hot and so so sad about it, and he looks so criminally good covered in blood it should actually be a crime. To this day the entirety of the “in the dark there is discovery” monologue fully lives rent free in my head, not to mention “my truest love, know no shame.” Ultimate blorbo status for sure.
6. Joan Watson (Elementary)
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Confession time: I was definitely one of those people who was initially dubious and upset that they were doing yet another modern Sherlock Holmes adaptation, and not only that, but they were making Watson a woman! “Oh this is obviously an egregious No Homo attempt, fuck this show,” I thought, and I was fully prepared to write off the whole enterprise. But then I found out they had cast Lucy Liu as Watson and I was conflicted because, seriously, Lucy Liu, how could you not totally love her? I decided to give the first episode a shot and was delighted to discover that Miss Joan totally captured my heart from the literal moment she appeared on screen. I’ve never been the biggest fan of the original Holmes stories so take all my opinions with a grain of salt here, but I love that Joan is played as Watson who is an actual equal to Sherlock. Their dynamic is an honest-to-god partnership, instead of the tired trope of the Brilliant Amazing Perfect Special Genius Boy and the long-suffering idiot who puts up with him. You can really see what Sherlock sees in Joan, all the things he values in her: her strength and quiet brilliance, her inquisitiveness and determination, and how she utterly refuses to put up with his bullshit from like, day one. This is a Watson with healthy boundaries, y’all. She’s just such a wonderful character in her own right. She’s more than Sherlock’s blogger, she has a life and dreams and goals of her own, and the show respects that. And not only that, but there is not even a hint of any tired romance tropes between the two of them. Their quiet queerplatonic domestic partnership evolves in such a really lovely way across the series, it is one of the core dynamics of the show, and it’s so good. And each episode is an excuse to look at Lucy Liu in gorgeous outfits for an hour at a time, which I will happily take where I can find it. Good show. Criminally underrated.
7. Aziraphale (Good Omens)
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Alright, I’ve got another shameful confession for you. I’ve never actually managed to finish reading Good Omens. I know I know, nail me to the cross. There was just something about the writing style that I could never fully get into, but I got far enough to know that Crowley and Aziraphale were totes in love 5ever, and even though I wouldn’t have understood why at the time, I really Related to Aziraphale for Some Mysterious Reason. Smash cut to 2019 and the first season of the TV version premiers and I’m watching Michael Sheen do all That as Aziraphale and a lightbulb pops on over my head and I just go oh. Gender!! There’s a tumblr post I love that talks about how Aziraphale is soft and effeminate and good, and that is such an important part of his character. He on-purpose cultivates a deliberately gay image because he relates to gay culture, because he identifies with being a maligned outcast to society the same way homosexuals were for most of the time he’s been on Earth. Our Angel loves food and pleasure and soft warm things, and that never stops him from being a hero. In fact, it is because of his hedonism and softness that he defies Heaven and Hell to literally save the day. To quote from that post directly, “He’s soft and queer and vain and he loves food and these are good qualities! These things are his and he wears them openly and defiantly and they make him strong in a way heaven doesn’t comprehend!” God, just, *slaps Aziraphale’s belly* this bad boy can hold so much gender. I love him endlessly.
8. GLaDOS (Portal 2)
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So rarely in media are women allowed to be unhinged murderous lunatics, but GLaDOS carries that heavy burden on her beautiful robot shoulders admirably. I think sometimes the fanon characterization of her focuses a little too heavily on either the tragedy of her, of Caroline being forced into this body against her will, or on the whole Evil Dommy Mommy Step on Me Cold Calculating Badass thing, which is unfortunate, because GlaDOS is also completely fucking bonkers in the best way. Not a goddamn hinge anywhere to be found on this bitch, and that’s what makes her so special. She’s silly! And weird! Her toxic yuri mother-daughter Thing with Chell is endlessly compelling, and every line out of her mouth is an ice-cold banger. Also, she gets the special honor of being one of the few characters I’ve cosplayed as, and she is certainly one of the funnest to portray. To this day I still have the entirety of her wake-up speech from Portal 2 memorized. “Okay look. We both said a lot of things you’re going to regret. But I believe we can put our differences behind us. For science. You monster.” She’s incredible.
9. Yuna (FFX, FFX-2)
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My first blorbo! Yuna Finalfantasy will always have a special place in my heart, for reasons I’m not sure I can properly articulate. FFX is one of The Games of All Time for me, I literally used to listen to the soundtrack as a lullaby, and to this day my dad and I can quote the dialogue along with the cutscenes. And Yuna’s arc just absolutely destroys me if I think too hard about it. She is just so good, she is quiet and gentle and sweet and absolutely drowning under the crushing enormity of her legacy, her mission, the fate of the goddamn literal world. And then she meets her match in the Manic Pixie Dream (Heh) Boy who gets her to open up and live a little, who makes her laugh and smile, and she really values him for it, for the discovery and possibility he represents for her. And then, the ultimate tragedy of him being the one to sacrifice for her, that she may live? Ugh!! It’s raining. On my face. To this day the scene of her Sending after Kilika just guts me, and the way she grows and changes and comes into her own over the course of FFX-2 breaks me down to my atoms. Best girl, no question.
10. Astarion (Baldur’s Gate 3)
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Alright. Okay. Yes. I know. I’m going to try and make this entry not just a rehash of my last post about Astarion or unhinged gay screaming for 500 words but like. Come on. Look at him. I never played Baldur’s Gate during early access,  but when I found out that one of your potential love interests was a queer pretty-boy vampire with a Tragic Backstory involving a twisted Master/slave dynamic I was...intrigued, to say the least. What I did not expect was all of the depth and complexity that went into writing him and portraying him. It helps that Neil Newbon has an absolutely delicious voice, yes, but there is so much more there besides the surface level of him. In fact, that is the entire point of his arc! Seeing beyond the very pretty seductive mask he presents to the world, to the gaping wounds and barely-concealed traumas and fear and insecurities behind it, and choosing to love him for it anyway. And by loving him, the real him, you make space for him to find himself, to rescue himself. A man who has spent 200 years buried under ground surviving horrific abuse and becoming cruel and petty to cope, finding the strength within himself to heal, to choose to live and to love, honestly. That is so fucking powerful, I will literally never get over it.
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