something about "your anger isn't scary to me" is making me so emotional. something about as above so below, cassandra as a mirror of kristen. something about "I've been dropping the ball a lot lately" and kristen's struggles with adhd. something about teenage girls and rage and fury and justice. something about adaine's vision of ruining fallinel and the sylvaire looking for revenge. something about sadness and doubt and anger and love. something about "I choose to understand" being the absolute core theme of d20 in general. something something.

at long, LONG last, i am reading heroes of olympus. have a lost trio <3

Oh

It's pomegranate season :)

A redraw of this piece from around a year ago

ttpd photoshoot | icons

“I just want to stay with you...” 

paranormasight is so impressive in that it's an anime-style mystery horror visual novel that doesn't have any "pervy jokes" or sexualized designs. the world thought it was impossible. scientists are baffled. danganronpa is sweating nervously

(also it's just impressive cause it's a really good vn please play it)

>look for the girl with the broken smile

>testosterone cypionate 200mg/mL

>he is mostly better now, but still working though all that old trauma and trying to avoid new traumas, some of it is unavoidable.

>boy who can meet his own eyes in the mirror now though, so at least there is that.

I miss you Lorna… this is such a mess

This is an old message and I had several other similar messages, but I miss you guys and hope you’re all doing well!! I’m sorry to see nothing has improved.

I saw I was kindly mentioned by @awesomefringey and some other commenters the other day, so just wanted to log in and say hello and log back out for a few more months. 💕

Sending so so much love to all of you. Take care of yourselves and each other, please.

The video is still on YT.

So a friend and I were playing around and I felt... Inspired. Vigilantes AU 🙌

Co-written with @davestriderisasimp, it's currently only a vague idea but it's so so fun either way!

YAPPING AHEAD, BEWARE !!!

Oh man. This AU was born because my friend made a funky Daniel in a really cool Epiphet Erased AU, and in turn, I made a David that matched. Then they became arch nemeses, kissed, punched each other, and committed so much dang crime!

In David's defense: he commits crime to stop criminals. Criminals like Daniel, and his team of EVIL MINIONS (they're all petty criminals AT BEST they're the cutest, bestest ever, I LOVE THEM)

Her Daniel was genuinely so fun that he was the first and only Daniel I ever even considering making a Danvid with. The OG Danvid has neat vibes, in a Killing Stalking kinda way, but it just wasn't my vibe, y'know? Good for those who like 'em, tho !!

This David is just... so neat. He's like if Davey's original snarky attitude had never been completely overriden by his love for camping. He blackmails Cameron for favors from time to time, but is pretty fond of the guy because he's not exactly a genius evil mastermind. He loves his friend Gwen and his son Max—who may or may not have been "kidnapped" from his home by some red-headed stranger who distracted his parents by setting their car on fire—and has started to care a little for his roommate, CJ.

He started vigilantism when he was just a teenager with some anger issues, man. And now he just got used to it! But hypocrisy just runs through his veins, as he feels super stressed whenever Max decides to sneak out to go after him and help. He wants to beat up strangers too!

Neither Max or David have "offensive" epiphets either: theirs are "Recover" and "Endure", respectively. A healing and a passively defensive power. Gwen's, though? Hers is "Orgasm". It's perfect for sweeping someone off their feet— if you get what I'm saying, HAH

Daniel's epiphet is "Kool Aid", and he uses it so dang well! He's the silliest villain you'll ever meet and I adore every moment he's "on-screen" (aka, whenever we talk about him, HEHEHE). He's the captain of a team of minions—yes, he does call them his minions. It's a very worthy title, I must say—who perform LOTS OF CRIMES together. Most of them are simple robberies, though, and David is incredibly amused by them.

He does, occasionally, fall on one of their traps. And then they laugh at him. Then they take him hostage to make him gawk at their mighty evil lair (they bring him over) and feel pathetically miserable once he sees that his own personal resting hours are nothing compared to the glory of their favorite entertainment (they watch some movies), and so on...

They're so, so, so so silly. I cannot express enough how much I freaking love them.

Also, Max has a bear motif. It just... It just stuck. I love him too (so does David HEHEHE)

As for Jasper...

His epiphet is "smoke", and he disappeared a long, long time ago. That's all I have for now!

Also this WIP, which I will probably never finish. Hehe.

the reason ineffable bureaucracy worked is they dont have 6000 years of resistence to love to work out. they dont have that baggage of years and years of saying something else instead of what they truly want to. the reason that ineffable bureaucracy worked is because they talked, they knew what each other wanted. did they deserve it??? i dont know, some people say they do and some people say they dont. we dont even know if gabriel or beelzebub felt like they deserved it. but its what they wanted. they took what they wanted and it was each other. and they both agreed that everything else is worth being torn to shreds to have one another's love. did aziracrow ever do that??? did they ever tell each other that they wanted each other to stop pretending in all that time??? did they decide to give a name to the feelings they had for one another??? not really until the end. they had milleniums together. but they had to dance around so many loopholes, danced around so many different excuses, glanced down to hide the love in their eyes. beelzebub and gabriel gave in to the consuming love they felt. aziraphale and crowley didnt, not until it was all too late. crowley was right to say that it was always too late. thats why they ended up breaking their hearts. it was always too late.

god it's just. the way they're both trying so hard to be there for each other, to be strong for each other

akk is at his breaking point already during class with teacher waree and goes hurtling past it with that fucker chadok yelling at him and yet he tries to smile for aye and tries to tell him he's okay. that he doesn't need to worry. and he pulls himself back together over and over again, lets himself cry for only a moment before trying to be strong because he can see that aye is barely holding on either. it's worrying how good he is at stopping himself while sobbing and pulling back his shoulders and trying to sound steady

and aye. god. aye is furious and trying so hard to get chadok away from akk and he's terrified because he understands how his uncle was driven to his demise, and i think he really, fully understands what his mother felt like now as well, when she asked him if he was leaving her too. it's the devastation on his face when he looks at akk, who only days ago was smiling and teasing him, kissing his cheek and flirting and being happy, that really just brings this point home. he's trying so hard not to let his grief and his fear and his anger get the best of him because he knows akk needs him, knows that he can't ever forgive himself if he doesn't give akk his all now, if something were to happen to him

it's just. i think they're both trying their best to hold themselves together because they haven't yet learned that they can be weak together, too. "you're allowed to be weak, at least with me" applies to them both at the same time, but it seems like aye and akk think they need to cling to cliff with one hand and each other with the other hand, instead of falling together holding each other

augh found my old post abt pjo and disability from before the show came out but it was on ye olde blog so i’m literally just gonna copy and paste, 3, 2, 1—

ok now that i’ve got it on the brain, i want to talk about disability in pjo and specifically how calling percy jackson dumb or treating him as such is not only a mischaracterization, but ableism. as a quick note, i’m keeping this to just percy to avoid having this already long post be even longer, but there are other disabled characters in pjo worthy of discussion, though i hit many of the same points in this post. i bring up percy specifically because he is mostly the character i have seen people treat as stupid.

percy is a dyslexic teen with ADHD who comes from a low-income family, raised by a single mother, and deals with an abusive step-father. i cannot stress enough how much of his character is shaped by that experience, but as hard as it is to single out any one part, i am going to focus on his ADHD and dyslexia. this kid has nightmares of being forced to take tests in a straightjacket as teachers ask him if he’s stupid and withhold him from recess with his peers. he is constantly labelled as “troubled” and blamed for things he didn’t do or aren’t his fault. he is told, over and over again, even from trusted adults, that he is “not normal” (othering him). he bounces between schools. he struggles to make friends. he deals with bullying. he has difficulty studying and reading, even when invested. teachers struggle to connect with him and tend to just give up on him. these are real disabled experiences, and rick does a good job at presenting them in the pjo books. sometimes, it feels like everything is a struggle. you are living inside a system that not only is restricting, but actively works against and punishes you.

in contrast, CHB is a great example of how when environments meet the needs of disabled people, it hugely changes how disabled we are in that environment. demigod brains are hard-wired for ancient greek, not english, and they’re born impulsive, with high energy levels that help them survive battle—but aren’t very good for a classroom setting. but by having them read books in ancient greek, regularly do lots of training/physical activities, and have genuine opportunities to express themselves...they function pretty damn well. percy discovers that while he struggles academically, he is brilliant in combat and capable of saving the world numerous times—he is a hero. do you know how important that message is for disabled children? disabled adults, too? that we can be heroes?

it is here, in camp half-blood, that percy finds a place he belongs, that shows him his worth—finally, somewhere is built to not only include him, but to nurture and genuinely prepare him for the world outside its boarders. however, i think people forget that just because percy functions in the world of CHB and the gods, that does not mean he doesn’t face ableism in the mortal world—and that there is an entire group of people who see ourselves reflected in his character.

i could talk on for hours about how much being disabled shapes percy’s identity and how he interacts with the world—like how percy’s humor revolves around coping with his environment and actually displays a very low self esteem after being looked down upon his entire life. this kid doesn’t even have to say anything and he screams i had a neurodivergent childhood. but about 5-6 years ago, when i was more regularly tuned into the fandom, every time i saw someone call percy jackson dumb or an idiot, even jokingly, i raised an eyebrow, and now that the series is getting fresh coverage from disney+, i have wanted to make this post. so much of this kid’s life and personality comes from being treated like he’s dumb or incapable, so it’s troubling to watch part of the fanbase reflect the harmful parts of this character’s upbringing. i truly hope it does not become common again. it’s also one thing coming from a neurodivergent/disabled person with similar experiences (and even then i personally find it a little uncomfortable), it’s another to be said by a neurotypical/able bodied person.

percy jackson’s experiences make for very important representation, and for people to characterize him as just a goofy, unintelligent guy is not only an insult to his character as a kid who is intelligent, but previously lacked the environment to show it, but also ableist. so in the dawn of the new tv series era, i ask that we cut that shit out. rick riordan did not create rep for neurodivergent and disabled kids for them to be called stupid by the fanbase. even jokingly.

«𝓣𝓱𝓮 𝓰𝓻𝓮𝓮𝓷 𝓸𝓯 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓭𝓮𝓮𝓹 𝓯𝓸𝓻𝓮𝓼𝓽 𝓮𝓶𝓫𝓻𝓪𝓬𝓮𝓼 𝓶𝓮,

𝓣𝓸𝓭𝓪𝔂, 𝓸𝓷𝓬𝓮 𝓪𝓰𝓪𝓲𝓷, 𝓘 𝓼𝓲𝓰𝓱 𝓭𝓮𝓮𝓹𝓵𝔂 𝔀𝓲𝓽𝓱 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓼𝓸𝓷𝓰 𝓸𝓯 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝔀𝓲𝓷𝓭.»

Kanashikute Yarikirenai - Kokia

theo and liam always getting paired together in 6b during episodes where all of the other storylines focus on couples going through stuff together is so funny because when you look at it, the only episode where they really get split up is genotype, which is one of the rare episodes where scott ISN’T paired with malia (because he’s with liam) and mason isn’t with corey (because he’s with theo) aka the canon love interests. like these episodes were cutting from shit like scalia almost dying together to thiam having intimate conversations about how liam processes emotions and morey saying i love you to thiam swearing that neither of them are dying for each other 😭 just very amusing to me. theo raeken: the accidental love interest.

Im not a big fan of endings of stuff for kids that is about a character rejected by their peers and/or society but at the end they risk their lifes to save the people that mistreated them and everyone loves them now. Like idk i dont think is the best teaching for kids to sacrifice themselves for the people that treat them badly 😔