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stevenspector · 15 days
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stevenspector · 17 days
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I know I rave about Steven a lot, but. Marc Spector. Marc Spector who, asked by Gods themselves if he's hurting, he answers yes, yes he's hurting, but his feelings don't matter next to a maniac he wants to protect the world from, and what harm he can cause to humanity.
Marc Spector who wanted to give Steven, a version of himself that he cares about tremendously, the normal, happy life he never got to live, and constantly promising he won't burden it by being there.
Marc Spector who lost his baby brother when he was just a child and suffered cruel, unjust, damaging abuse from his mother who made him feel responsible for it.
Marc Spector who kills only "the worst of the worst" and still, the guilt of that is so crushing that he remembers each and every one of them. Where they come from, their faces, in vivid detai, and only responds with " you try taking a life"
Marc Spector feeling so guilty over his brother that he pictures him in a room with other people he's killed.
Marc Spector who sobbed and mourned for his mother even after she emotionally and physically abused him and robbed him of self-esteem, self-worth, and joy.
Marc Spector, who was willing to sacrifice his relationship with Leyla, the one person in his life who ever made him feel heard and seen and like he belonged, who made him feel just a bit less alone, because the deity he sold his soul to wanted her as his replacement and he wanted to spare her the pain.
Marc Spector, who rejected a peaceful paradise in favour of dying with Steven.
Marc Spector, who had the man that was willing to eradicate millions of people for a self-righteous cause at his feet and could've landed the killing blow, and chose to give mercy instead.
Marc Spector.
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stevenspector · 19 days
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ok… imagine a moon knight and daredevil crossover where dd has no issues fighting the invisible jackals because the dude cant see shit anyway. moon knight is like “you can see them??” and matt, not wanting to reveal his blindness but having no idea theyre invisible, is just like “yeah i can see of course i can see”
moon knight then assumes dd is an avatar of an egyptian god. bc what else? so, naturally, moon knight asks “what god do you serve?”
“jesus”
“what??”
“im catholic?”
“what???”
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stevenspector · 19 days
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very incredibly emotional abt steven grant rn. steven grant who is consistently kind and apologetic and shy. we start off in the first few episodes thinking that steven is the host and marc is his stoic protector made to confront anyone who tries to hurt him.
but steven is the protector. he is soft-spoken, constantly saying sorry. because that’s what the body needed to be to survive. not aggression, not fight or even flight, but to fawn. to minimize danger by constantly appeasing others. we can assume this worked because steven has no bad memories of his mother— presumably she left him alone or even treated him passably because he knew what to do around her. how to act. how not to bother her.
when dr harrow is calling her in front of him, we hear steven saying don’t do that, and twice he says don’t bother her, please. am i crazy to think that despite the happy loving image he has of his mother, he still had that internal monologue going? it’s worth noting that despite his very positive opinion of his mother he still seems somewhat… anxious when it comes to her. he doesn’t tell her the truth, hardly— it seems everything he tells her over the phone is processed and filtered in such a way so as to not upset her. when the date goes badly, he lies. when he ends up in the middle of the street, he laughs about it and even jokingly puts himself down to her. all things he is used to, even if he’s not sure why. all the stress in his life he seems to vent to things that cannot respond to him— gus, being a fish, and a living statue, whose job is to sit there and do nothing. people and things he cannot bother. and when dr harrow starts calling, he starts tearing up, begging him not to bother her— what does he think the repercussions are?
to me even the final realization of my mum is dead. feels like an acceptance of not just that fact but all of marc’s memories, at least the start of that process. he’s filling in the gaps. do you think there were times where he slipped up, bothered her, and suddenly woke up alone in bed, bruised or with his face wet with tears, unsure how he got there? unaware that marc or jake had to step in and take the blows because they wouldn’t expose steven to that? do you think he begins to cry in that scene because he’s realizing what must’ve happened to the body through the years after he was taken from front each time?
dead means more than simply she’s not living. the image steven had of his mother is dead as well. the love and the admiration are dead. marc and presumably jake had known she’d passed away, but when steven disconnects from her, stops calling her, stops loving her, that’s when she’s truly dead to them. because even past her actual death, steven was still talking to her— and marc must have known. jake must have known. marc had his reasons for getting a phone of his own but i feel like one of them was so that he wouldn’t have to look at all the unreturned calls to a number he feels sick even looking at. they hadn’t wanted steven to know the truth, any bit of it. steven had been unaware they even had a brother.
(and if i get into the implications of marc being so resistant at first to letting steven follow roro… he hates himself for what happened and he refuses to let steven know. maybe because he thinks steven would hate him, blame him, say it was his fault… and even more heartbreaking still because he thinks steven would blame and hate himself.)
the system trying to protect steven’s innocence is something so truly sob worthy to me. not only because they genuinely care about him and want him to be happy, or because him being happy may be the only remaining bit of them that is, or because they know it’s near impossible to live with it and steven’s possibly one of the only reasons they’re still alive (marc seems to have been perfectly content going practically dormant seeing as steven apparently had a functioning life, job, everything for a while, with the only disturbance being one of his alters— and we could even assume that was actually jake, given that he’s more likely to have set up a date than recently-divorced marc —up at night). i need y’all to also consider that the system still needs him to protect them. they still live in fear.
they need steven, because they need someone who is too good to hurt. marc and jake don’t see themselves as deserving of mercy or love but they know steven is. they need him to be comfortable and happy and healthy because it is their body’s only chance to feel it. because he deserves it and they want to preserve that state for as long as possible. again, because that’s what they need, have always needed, to survive.
aghhhhgg :(
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stevenspector · 19 days
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Happy Birthday Marc Spector
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stevenspector · 19 days
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Now THAT'S a provocative url. Something to think about. Really sticks with you
hehe thank you
i was honestly surprised it wasn't taken yet
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stevenspector · 1 month
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☥ ☥ ☥
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stevenspector · 2 months
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thinking about Jake Lockley's dynamic within the system- (plus some close-up profile pics of them cus yee)
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stevenspector · 4 months
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stevenspector · 4 months
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How MK can be Latino and Jewish: A Guide for Fanfic Writers and RPs
Thank you to @fdelopera for help me with this post
This is my headcanon (the canon in the Usaigi Fanfic Universe) and you're welcome to adapt it for your own works of fiction. Of course, this is not the only explanation and you are free to headcanon however you’d like* ** This is a long post but please read and reblog.
*as long as you’re NOT perpetrating antisemitic and/or racist rhetoric
**if you do use mine I'll be over the moon and would love to read it. Also credit is nice 
In honor of Oscar Isaac’s actual ethnicity(Guatemalan-Cuban) and to stay semi-realistic to actual history, in my hc Elias’s family is mostly Sephardic and Ashkenazi Jewish from Cuba who left Cuba during the Cuban revolution. Wendy’s family is Ladino(a term in Guatemala for someone who is multiracial with a mix of indigenous and European ancestry. Mestizo in other countries) with Mayan and converso (Sephardic/Crypto) ancestry. Oscar Isaac, in real life, is also Crypto-Jewish (literally, “Hidden-Jewish”) on his father’s side, making him Patrilineal Jewish by descent. His father’s family are descended from Converso Jews who were evicted from Spain in the 1500s. 
Nitpicking Other Fandom Explanations/HCs
I’ve read some fanfics where Wendy is Latina and Elias a non-Latino jew. I personally prefer my explanation because the actor who plays Elias is also Latino. And, (to me) having Wendy be the Latina convert and Elias the (American) Jew plays into the idea that people from Latin America can’t be Jewish, so I personally don’t vibe with that headcanon.  
Both before and during WWII, there was a wave of Jewish refugees who sought asylum in Latin America. I’ve seen other fans suggest that the Spectors could be the descent of these refugees who settled in Argentinian (or another South American country that took in refugees) because “Spector” is an Ashkenazi last name and proceed to imply that they would not be “Latino” by blood. 
Firstly, I’d like to point out that there is no such thing as being “Latino by blood.” In the same sense that you cannot be Canadian or American by blood. First Nations and Native Americans are the only ones able to make that claim but their history and culture existed before the land was called Canada or America. They are Inuit/Navajo/etc by blood, not really Canadian/American by blood. It’s a European idea. “Latino” similarly, is a European word used to describe an ethnicity; it is not a race. (x) So even if the Spectors left Poland/Russia/Europe in 1930s, settled in Argentina, and some generations later MK was born, MK would still be Latino. 
Secondly, while you don’t need to follow my headcanon, if you choose to make Elias 100% ethnically European Jewish(white), I would still encourage you to make Wendy indigenous/multiracial. By making both sides of the family descendants of Jewish refugees from Europe, you’re whitewashing MK. Oscar Isaac is a POC actor, let his character also be POC. Don’t just make the character Latino, let them be brown. 
ok back to me~
On Elias
“The majority of Cuban Jews are descended from European Jews who immigrated in the early 20th century. More than 24,000 Jews lived in Cuba in 1924, and still more immigrated to the country in the 1930s. Following the 1959 communist revolution, 94% of the country's Jews emigrated, most of them to the United States.” (x)
For Elias and his side of the family, him being Cuban makes sense. He could be the descendant of those who left Spain, Turkey, and Eastern Europe due to persecution and intermarried with non-Jewish Tainos/mestizos. Elias would still be Jewish but also have some indigenous ancestry as well. If Elias was in his 20s when he had Marc, his family could have left Cuba in 1959 along with most other Jews and resettled in the States.
Further reading on Jewish Cubans: https://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/cuba-virtual-jewish-history-tour
On Wendy
In my head, Wendy is Ladino with Mayan, European, and conversa(Jews forced to convert to Catholicism) ancestry.
Assuming that Wendy was also in her 20s when she had Marc, she’d have been born and lived through the Guatemalan Civil War/Genocide (1960-1996). For context, with the support of the United States government, the Guatemalan government committed genocide against the Mayan population as well as widespread human rights violations against civilians. Wendy could have immigrated to the US when she was a teenager like many Latine children did (and still do) in order to escape the violence and war. Then, she could have converted back to Judaism, married Elias, then proceed to have Marc and Randall. 
How would the MK System be considered Jewish if Wendy were not raised Jewish, and converted in adulthood?
(by fdelopera)
Most major Jewish denominations in the US will recognize a child as Jewish if the mother converts before marriage. These denominations include Reform (Ashkenazi denomination from Germany), Conservative (Ashkenazi denomination from Russia), and Reconstructionist (Ashkenazi denomination from the United States).
Nowadays, some Orthodox congregations also allow women to convert who weren't raised Jewish, and consider the children to be Jewish, so long as the conversion takes place prior to marriage. (Ultra-Orthodox congregations are still strict about this.)
However, in the 1980s when MK was born, this was not normally the case. In Orthodox communities, it would be unlikely for children to be considered Jewish if the mother was not born Jewish, and there was much less awareness of Crypto-Jewish people from Latam.
There is a "relatively" large Latine Jewish population in Chicago (relative to other Midwestern cities, at least), and because of this, there are several Sephardic synagogues in the Chicago area. The Spectors might have considered joining one of these synagogues as a family. Perhaps Elias grew up in one. However, Sephardic synagogues tend to be nondenominational Orthodox, and as such, they would have been more strict about conversion. It is possible that they would have prevented Wendy from converting, and they might have gatekept Marc and Roro from their Judaism.
Wendy might have decided to convert Reform, since a Reform congregation would recognize her Jewish heritage, and therefore her conversion process would be much easier. Elias might have left his childhood synagogue and followed Wendy to a Reform Temple. (In the show, the Spectors are coded as Reform Jewish, and so this HC works.)
However, Reform congregations were not as used to Latino members in the 1980s and 90s, and so the Spectors would likely have encountered racism in these communities, even though the Reform congregations would have recognized Wendy as Jewish, and made it relatively easy for her to convert. 
So, the family would have experienced possibly less racism in Sephardic synagogues in Chicago, but Wendy might not have been welcomed. They would have been accepted as Jews in the Reform Temples in Chicago, but they likely would have experienced racism.
So, it's another instance of the family being outsiders in their own communities, further marginalizing them. And by extension, marginalizing the MK System and making it difficult for them to participate in both Jewish and Latine communities.
What does this mean for MK system (and by extension Randall)?
The Spectors would likely have been the black sheep in their community.
 Not really fitting in with the Jewish community (since they’re Latino) and not really fitting in with the Latino community (since they’re Jewish). They are Jewish, they are Latino, but not in “the right way.” While I feel like this is important to keep in mind, I would suggest not writing about this particular subject (“gatekeeping”/racism in the Jewish community) unless you are a member of these communities AND you have done your research. By making an auntie in your fic say something racist, you may be contributing to the idea that Jews are racist which could harm them in real life. By making a tia say something anti-Semitic, it could do the same. Even if you're writing angst/drama, I think I’m not the only POC who will say that reading stories about racism isn’t super fun. MK has a shit ton of trauma that you can explore without unintentionally saying negative things about communities you are not a part of. 
But can I write cultural trauma I have a Jewish/Latine beta reader?
Don’t ask Jewish/Latine people to read a fic about our cultural trauma. It’s rude, it’s insensitive, it could be triggering. It’s not POC/Jewish people’s job to tell you when you being offensive. 
I think it’s fine to talk about how they feel like they don’t fit in, but please don’t make your Jewish characters/Latine characters be racist/antisemitic. 
2. Intergenerational Trauma 
At this point, I’m starting to believe it’s impossible to be Indigenous/POC or Jewish (or Autistic) without trauma. All these groups have been victims of hate crime, genocide, and discrimination for most of human history. If Elias’s parents escape a war, that could have affected him. If Wendy lived through war, that most certainly would have affected her. If neither got help, support, or healthy coping skills, that would affect Marc and Randall. This is intergenerational trauma. This is why it’s a cycle. 
Bonus: This is all great, all power and blessed Usaigi, but do I need to talk about all of this in my fanfic?
No, of course not. This is all just for backstory you may want to keep in mind if it’s relevant to your story. If your fic is a fluff piece about Marc and Steven going to the park, totally not relevant. If your fic is a flashback of when the system was younger, may be relevant. 
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stevenspector · 4 months
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So lets talk about Moon Knight and Egyptian Mythology.
At the end of the most reccent episode, I found it very interesting that instead of Anubis being the one presiding over Marc and Steven, reccently dead, it was Taweret.  Buckle in fellas because this is a bit long:
Anyways, due to how ancient Egyptian Mythology is and how massive the Pantheon is (well over 2000 deities total) there are a number of gods associated with death.
First, let’s talk Osiris. Osiris is considered to be the current god of Death and Rebirth— and a number of other realms including fertility and agriculture. While this might be a bit weird beacuse, what about Anubis, think of it more as a… Hades Thanatos sort of situation. Osiris controls (the rate at which lobsters die) death, and then handles the rebirth process. He, of course, is not the only god with the domain of rebirth, but is usually attributed to it, along with the above domains.
Next, there are both Thoth and Ma’at. I would consider these two to be Death-Associated gods in truth. Thoth is the god that presides over a number of domains like Osiris and many other major gods do— this includes his role as Aani, the god of equilibrium. Aani was the one who reported when the scales weighing the deceased’s heart against the feather was exactly even. Ma’at is the goddess of truth and it is her feather that is used for the weighing of the scales in the underworld.
Ammit, however, is a rather tricky case. She’s not so much as a god of death like Anubis and Orisis, but a god associated with death like the above two. Ammit was never quite worshipped in history— this seems to be a strictly Moon Knight thing— and was not strictly a goddess in this sense, but she was the personification of all that the ancient Egyptians feared and a reminder to live by the principles of Ma’at. 
(more under the cut)
Keep reading
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stevenspector · 4 months
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I don’t think y’all know how long I would spend in Steven Grant’s apartment. That place is like a treasure chest of information and cool shit. Plus? It’s like…in an attic. What the fuck? It’s the coolest apartment I’ve ever seen and I wanna live there.
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stevenspector · 5 months
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Steven Grant
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stevenspector · 5 months
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correct me if I'm wrong cause it's been a hot min since I've watched the series, but I feel like Marc didn't actually know that Steven had a date. we know he's not the one who set it up (he has a wife he's still not over) and Steven never would have asked her out himself, so Marc probably thought Steven had no weekend plans as always, which is why he missed the one thing that would clue Steven into the fact that he's missing time.
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stevenspector · 5 months
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i dont watch loki so i cant confirm but i heard that the steven insomnia podcast was in some sort of trailer or teaser, but they changed it in the show
good catch, anon! I just went back through all the trailers and featurettes and I found it.
(at 2:22!)
youtube
looks like they DID change it for the show though. I wonder why... I'm back on my bullshit now.
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stevenspector · 6 months
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the moon knight system + moments of autistic joy
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stevenspector · 6 months
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with how much Oscar loved Moon Knight and especially playing Steven, how softly and happily he talks about it, it would be such wasted potential and a shame not to have at least one more season
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