Morpheus acts real tough for a guy who looks like he’s one small inconvenience away from totally losing it
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[after saving woman's life]
Woman in alley: Thank you! Thank you! That thing was going to kill me!
Bucky: Well, what did you expect? Out alone in this neighborhood—I've got half a mind to kill you myself, you half-wit.
Woman in alley: What?
Bucky: I mean, honestly, what kind of retard wears heels like that in a dark alley? Take two steps and break your bloody ankle.
Woman in alley: [annoyed] I was just trying to get home.
Bucky: Well, get a cab, you moron, and, on the way, if a stranger offers you candy, don't get in the van!
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Good dog. Good dog.
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Remember when RDJ posted this about a year ago?
Now don’t get me wrong but MCU can never compare to the gem that was Avengers Assemble. It might not have given us everything but one thing that never changed was this:
The man on the receiving end was always the same!
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the pros of reading ao3 fics in public is that their layout is so clean and simple that people would think you’re reading some academic researches when you’re in fact reading a 50k fic. the cons is that you need to control your face all the fucking time
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