April 19th, 2024

Rainy days and my mood is low. I'm exhausted to my bones, really tired. I'm running on caffeine, sugar, and painkillers. This is definitely not healthy and I hope things will change soon. At least I know that in a few weeks it's all over but the end seems far away.

April 14th, 2024

I took my psychology and pedagogy exam on Thursday. I couldn't be happier that it's finally over and I even got the best possible grade! I'm so relieved but now the stress is still wearing off and I'm feeling really exhausted. Still, next exam is right ahead.

April 10th, 2024

Studying and daydreaming. It's hard to focus for longer stretches. I'm tired of studying and trying to memorise things. At least it's over tomorrow:)

April 4th, 2024

Still finding it hard to study. Actually anything but painting is hard these days. Should I just become a full time artist? ;)

April 3rd, 2024

Looking forward to when the landscape will look like on the left photo. By then everything will be over. I can't wait.

I talked to my PhD supervisor yesterday and it seems like I will be able to complete the process in about two months. Then this will be done, too!

April 1st, 2024

Writing often came easy to me and even though I struggled sometimes, I always loved my research topic and enjoyed the process. I don't say the writing process was a walk in the park but it was great to work on something I am deeply interested in and which challenged me in a good way. Right now I'm studying and this feels so different and definitely not enjoyable. Whenever I think about it, I feel miserable and stressed... At least there isn't much time left!

March 28th, 2024

I forgot how to study in the sense of memorising facts to reproduce in an exam... It has been more than 7 years since the last time I was tested this way and I have to say, I do not like it...

March 19th, 2024

I've been working so much lately that I feel close to a breakdown and therefore I decided it's time to slow down and focus on things I love. So I've been painting and trying to spend quality time with my family. Still have been working too much.

March 16th, 2024

This week was filled with so much work. Today I'm taking a day off. This gloomy spring day gives all the dark academia vibes. Had a nice walk to clear my head and now I'll have a slow day, cleaning the house and doing all the things I was too busy for during the week.

March 14th, 2024

Work, work, work. At least there's only one week left before Easter holidays. I'll have to study a lot during those two weeks but at least there won't be added anything new to the pile of to dos.

What are your thoughts on decolonial vs postcolonial

Hi, thanks for your question! I think the decolonial is a natural consequence of postcolonial examinations. My thesis is rather postcolonial because it's an analysis of the effects of colonialism. It dismantles different oppressive strategies, some (or most) of them still prevailing today. As a result, I'm convinced that there needs to be done a lot of work. And this is were the decolonial comes in. I actively try to identify colonial language and behaviour/convictions I might still have/use and work against this. I'm convinced that the problem is rooted so deeply in society that we all still can find some traces in ourselves and that it's our duty to give our best to change that. As I teacher I try to raise awareness for injustices, racism, and any form of discrimination in general.

What's your opinion?

March 10th, 2024

I spent the whole weekend working because I have a deadline tomorrow. I hope this semester won't be like these last two weeks all the time. I'm tired and I just want a day off.

March 6th, 2024

It feels like spring already. Trees are starting to bloom and when the sun comes out it already feels like april.. There are so many things I have to do and sometimes it feels ok but mostly overwhelming. It's just a phase but I really wish I had a little more time for myself just to calm down a bit.

March 3rd, 2024

I feel like I didn't really have a weekend but at least I got a lot of things done and also spent some time outside. The weather was wonderful, it really felt like spring... Finished writing my last paper, now it's only editing, prepared my classes, wrote a report,... And fell asleep sitting on the Hollywood swing in my garden.

March 2nd, 2024

Not feeling it. I just want to go out and do nothing but there's a huge pile of work waiting for me. And I have to get it done. So I'll do it.

February 27th, 2024

Revising old notes and trying to make a study plan... Too many tabs open in my mind at the moment, but yeah... I will survive!