I think Matty Healy is awful but I’m still proud of Taylor putting “but daddy I love him” on the record.

There are songs on the album about her realising he love bombed her and manipulated her. Realising she fell for all of it, she was never going to fix him, and he was never going to be her saviour. She is scathing towards him, but also towards herself for falling for it. She could have left it at that and maybe copped less criticism. Instead she acknowledges the backlash and the defiance she felt in that moment.

It makes me feel the same way her putting Ours on Speak Now does. Grateful that she is open to sharing her stories even when the muse isn’t deserving of the words she wrote, even when releasing it fans the fires of the “I told you so” crowd.

And much like Ours is not a defence of Mayer, BDILH is not an acquittal of Healy. The phrasing she uses is not “he’s a good man they just don’t know him like I do”, it’s “I’m not coming to my senses” “I’d rather burn my whole life down”. The message of the song is not her trying to convince you he’s a good person (he’s not), it’s about a woman stumbling through a crisis and her desperate need to be able to make her own decisions, and that includes her own mistakes - which she seems to be acknowledging Matty was.

everyone needs to reconcile with the fact that taylor actually felt insane and like she should be in an asylum and she actually felt like dying. ofc in hindsight she can see that all of it hyperbolic, but these are not just metaphors. it was true in the moment. she’s also tired of the public image of a good girl because she inflicted that on herself and that hindered her from growing, and public inflicting this image on her is also hindering her, and she hates that. she wants to make mistakes and learn on her own and she has reconciled with the fact that she’ll have to live with herself and live with regret because she chose to do it. she thinks she’s fucked up because she is! and she wants the public to see it! (even though now i think she’s trying to un-fuck herself)

Please I've been on my knees, change the prophecy. Don't want money, just someone who wants my company

im sure lots of people will listen to TTPD and discount it because she talks about matty in it (and ofc people have their valid issues with him, but im not gonna go into that), but the whole lead up to the album has been “we’re investigating,” and imo a lot of us took that as her saying “we’re investigating why my relationship ended” whereas the album is actually about “we’re investigating this caricature of a girl who went through something life-changing, and she has apparently gone crazy” and she’s basically done a public autopsy of herself; something that the media/fans/public have done since the beginning, but this time around she was like “i’ll do it to myself.”

hence, the album aesthetic feels so sterile too imo. she’s trying to distance herself from the subject but!!!!!! she is the subject. and in conclusion, i think what she’s really putting down is “the summary of the investigation of this girl is that she went insane because of what happened to her, but it’s hopefully gonna be okay”

sidenote: i think what we need to take away from the album is to… let her live…

tiktok swifties are failing to understand the album is literally an anthology of poetry but to music, so it’s meant to be long and slow processing. you’re supposed to sit and meditate on it. you need to think about the lines, think about the authors life, think about your own, then go back to the song with understanding. it’s not an easy breezy album, it’s taylor swifts poetry collection and we’re all supposed to sit on it

This might be the only funny swiftie post ever

this makes me sad and mad tbh

shuffling my on repeat playlist and listing the first 10 songs:

1- Burton St. by OSTON

2- Fortnight by Taylor Swift and Post Malone

3- Wildflower by Mel Bryant & the Mercy Makers

4- Homesick by House Phone

5- One More Weekend by Maude Latour

6- I Can Do It With A Broken Heart by Lauryn Marie

7- Daffodil by Florence + the Machine

8- It Will Come Back by Hozier

9- Bodybag by Chloe Moriondo

10- obsessed by Olivia Rodrigo

definitely not the first person to say this but i am obsessed with taylor offering up an extremely long album that takes a minute to digest in the era of short content and instant gratification

ttpd is like... this fucking sucked... it was my fault... fuck joe... this also fucking sucked... fuck matty... i thought i was gonna die... straight up commit me to an asylum... FUCK matty... fuck joe... no one knows me... fuck kim kardashian... i created every problem and every consequence i have to face... please see me as human... i am exposing my flaws so you see me as a real person... fuck jake gyllenhaal... if you're gonna be so up my business you better realize how fucked up my business is... also hi killatrav ily... there is nothing redeeming about this chapter of my life... hi mom ily... this ALSO fucking sucked... there may be good in the world... here is every sin i have ever committed... i was promised love and forever repeatedly and no one ever delivered... my reaction to trauma was awful... i made so many bad decisions... if you're gonna crucify me do it for good reasons... are you not entertained?

if aaron dessner was a frog i'd carry him in my shirt pocket and buy him a little top hat so he can accompany me on long walks in the nature

“i hate it here” is peak escapism and hearing her talk about how she lives in a garden no one else has access to in her mind (unlike the rest of her life) for most of the year is sooooo. made up scenarios and imagining living in the 1800s… it’s giving the lakes except she’s alone and she can’t actually leave. so much of the album is about feeling stuck and this one is about feeling stuck in herself.

genuinely the way taylor clearly falls hard and fast and hopelessly in love every single time is very endearing. writing "this happens once every few lifetimes" and "no one's ever had me, not like you" on the same album that covers the breakdown of two relationships that were also seemingly destined and life changing and unmatched by anyone else is exactly what makes her so good at writing about relationships. if a songwriter doesn't feel everything with their whole chest and throw their whole being into it then I don't want it

this is the most trite statement but i i genuinely can’t wrap my head around how she managed to do eras tour in the midst of all this