Rejoice, “let’s fake a relationship for Christmas” fanfic season is upon us.

THIS IS THE MOST NSFW IMAGE I HAVE EVER SEEN

SHIT

WARN ME NEXT TIME NGOZI

George is either recounting something one of the Falcs did or chirping Jack about his shoes. Jack & George, run buds.

Hey do you know this fic where everyone is porn stars, and bitty is doing a scene with jack and bitty weakness filming is rimming, and bitty gets too fucking distracted to act when this happens, and Jack is snug af about it... I can't find it,,,

WHAT THE FUCK!!! I NEED TO READ THIS

WHERE IS IT. GIVE IT TO ME. 

Pornstar Bitty and Jack is just ... GOD ... so good. I need it.

Jack never stood a chance.

“Jack honey, please put on more sunblock. I know you’re patriotic but red and white aren’t good skin tones.”

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Ok but I just thought about bitty smacking Jack's ass as a joke but Jack is actually super turned on by it.

Surely this is canon by now.

Jack’s ass is approximately the size of Saturn. Do you know how many nerve endings are in something that obnoxiously large? A buttload.

Jack’s got sensitive skin already, but combine it with the vast expanse of his never-seen-the-sun backside, and you’ve got a potent combination for a serious case of “Jack Zimmermann loves it when people touch, tickle, lick, suck, bite, or slap his booty”.

He LOVES having his butt smacked. 

I’ll bet, sometimes, he even squeaks when he’s hit. 

Just wanted to share a small headcanon…asexual service top/service dom jack. Like, he wasn’t really into sex or masturbation, maybe a bit it was the meds or maybe it was just how things were, but it never bothered him much. He did always like pleasuring others tho. So one day he and Bitty are making out and without thinking about it he holds down his wrists…and oh, Bitty seems to like it. So they start experimenting and now Jack absolutely loves holding Bitty down, maybe tying him up while he sucks him off and he fucks him either with his cock or a dildo and makes him come two, three, four times………anyway. Just thought it was worth sharing xx

your tags on post/160281355266/chemicalrejectboys-just-your-every-day made me giggle so thanks for that :D hope you have a great day!!

You’re welcome sweet darling Nonny-buns. I hope you have a top-notch day FOREVER

Okay but imagine Bitty has a blog where he posts nudes and videos ( psst thinn-finn) and he keeps it up once he's at Samwell - if anything he becomes more bold and popular - and Jack jerks off to him (not knowing its Bitty) and sends him little anon compliments and one day a new video is posted, dedicated to jack, and just as he cums he spots Senor Bun in the corner and cums harder than he ever has before because HOLY SHIT ITS BITTLE

I WOULD READ THE EVERLOVING FUCK OUT OF A FIC LIKE THIS.

I WOUL… I WOULD BE BURIED WITH IT. I WOULD WEAR IT AS A HAT. I WOULD WORSHIP AT ITS FEET LIKE THE GENEROUS DEITY IT IS.

Best Check Please! vine completion I’ve found so far. (from crabbiekat on youtube)

Just your every day junk-and-butt grabbin’.

playoff beard + undercut????

Who wants to give this deserving human being a birthday gift that will keep on giving??? I, for one, think it's the very least we can do.

The hair pulling prompt (43) on @nsfwzimbits prompt page is everything I need now :( I actually tried to pass off my birthday as unimportant but if anyone wanted to give me a belated present…feel free to complete it…or any other prompt on the page for that matter…

I have an image I need help with PLEASE JUST okay it's really hot and Bitty's just in jacks shirt eating a Popsicle because he's evil and wants to get his boyf all hot and bothered and jacks just in sweats and I just UGH the image of jack hauling bitty up and running his hands over his thighs pushing up the shirt and then kissing those cold full lips byYYEYEYEYEYE

It’s a hot summer day in Georgia, and Jack has never been more turned on in his life.

“– and then Aunt Mary was all, ‘Suzanne, you knew perfectly well my daughter was bringing us home pictures of her ultrasound, yet you had to go on ranting about Dicky’s hockey games and that was, quite frankly, rude’. And of course my mom had no idea about Aunt Mary’s granddaughter– ooh, did I tell you, Jack? Theresa’s having a girl! But anyway, my mom had no idea, and she would have apologized if Aunt Mary hadn’t gone and made her seem like the goddamn devil in front of half the family, you know? So anyway my mom ended up…”

Bitty’s rambling a mile a minute by Jack’s side, lazily draped across one of the white rocking chairs. He’s been going on about the happenings of the Bittle family for nearly a half hour, and even if Jack no longer knows which aunts are really his aunts and which ones are a friend from church, well, just watching Bitty talk is enough.

Another bonus is that from Jack’s spot perched on the railing, Bitty looks absolutely sinful. Legs on full display in those little red shorts of his, cheeks flushed from the heat, his hair bleached blonde from the summer sun.

The worst part, though? Bitty’s got on one of Jack’s shirts– and not just a Zimmermann jersey, no, but one of Jack’s actual shirts. It’s just a black t-shirt, so he doesn’t think Bitty’s parents will suspect anything, but Jack knows.

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hi i asked for help finding a fic where jack gets overwhelmed at grocery stores awhile back (thanks for sharing that with your followers) and i found it and some other people expressed interest so i wanted to report back that it's part of maybe you'll be lonesome too by elizajane on ao3 (specifically in chapter 14)

Thanks Nonny! You're a champion of unparalleled proportions! I'm on mobile at the moment, but once I'm home with my laptop I'll put a link up for the fic

My headcanon is bits has his nips pierced, and they really sense and Jack loves it. This is it. I just,, bits would do it.

This is all true.And Jack likes to hold the piercings between his teeth and gently tug them until Bitty moans

bitty making senor bun face the wall when he and jack are getting busy