"When one is alone and lonely, the body gladly lingers in the wind or the rain, or splashes into the cold river, or pushes through the ice-crusted snow. Anything that touches."
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25 Laws of power for women
Conceal your goals especially the ones that are appealing. Losing weight, reinventing yourself, marrying wealthy. Instead talk about your altruistic goals - to help children, invest in education, this will chase insecure people with vile intentions.
Do not give anyone your source of power: Was is a book that changed your life? a mentor? a movie? Never give up your secret to success. If forced to do say allude to God, the universe, the a random phenomenon
Use the patriarchy to your favor; we live in a world that is, only associate with men who have power, use that power for good.
Never appear too perfect but be selectively vulnerable when needed. Only share something that you will be comfortable saying. You might say “I forget my keys all the time,” “I don’t know how to perfectly park a car “. But never disclose something you are not comfortable with just because you are afraid of being perfect.
Maintain distance in relationships. Friends are the best and you need them. But if you feel that they are becoming too dependent, see them at your own will. But also the reverse could be the case. Your friend may keep a distance, and that is the way of life. You have got to move on from it.
Develop your own style that makes you unique, beautiful, and elegant. Avoid trying to fit in the crowd of people who claim to care less about their style yet have too many opinions about other women’s style
Avoid male friends at all cost, you will have male colleagues, male bosses, male acquaintances, business partners. Keep it that way. You do not want a Truman Capote divulging your secrets to the world. Do not keep a man who does not fit your standard.
You do not have to win at every game. Pick and choose what is best for you and leave room for others. And step down if you have attained that level of success, do not let the society do it for you.
Trust people but remember that we are all humans. So trust with discretion!
Confuse people with kindness; people are not always comfortable with beautiful and intelligent women. That power is too intimidating so confuse them by being genuinely generous, curious, kind, and passionate.
Keep your strong opinions to yourself.. if you support a movement, a way of life, do so silently.
We all have dirty laundry, wash them privately, don’t expose yourself. Remain silent when people try to attack you or shame you. Whatever is not confirmed is not true. You are the only one who knows all the truth about you.
Don’t attract pity or praise: People who pity you do not help you, in fact they might think that you are weak and could mock you at their annual gossipping meeting. And if you are doing things for the sake of praise you are wasting your time.
Choose yourself all the time; never put any one’s feelings above yours.
Trust your own intuition if you feel someone is being malicious towards you, giving you back handed compliments then you should let them go
Never speak bad of another woman. Do not lazy around gossipping. Keep your hands clean and your conscience clear.
Avoid women with low self esteem they will bring you down. For some reason they do not like seeing other women who are doing better than them
Be careful who you seek validation from. Not everyone needs to be pleased. If they are in no way capable of contributing to your life in the ways you prefer, then don’t ask them for their opinions or please them.
Do not compete with other women, if you do you are only putting them on a pedestal. You are making the the standard by which you measure your progress. If you do compete, begin digging your grave.
Do not give unsolicited advice, do not share the inner workings of your mind, If your mouth is very charitable you better start journaling.
Be well-rounded and interesting. It attracts people. It also keeps you busy because you are continually improving and learning. An idle mind is an easily subdued one.
Avoid women who want to live vicariously through you; they want to know who you know, shop where you shop, befriend who you befriend, wear what you wear.
Pay attention to the source of your discomfort; get rid of them. You tell them your dreams and they remind you of all your hindrances. They ask why are you dressed so fancy as though fancy isn’t subjective. They undermine you interests and goals. They will also be quick to bring you down because they are afraid of your potential.
Do not fear power or please power. When we see powerful people we try to hard to befriend them, to be close to them but you need to be comfortable without them. Don’t push yourself in the name of friendship, do not try too hard to be in their inner circle. Your independence of mind is the most important. Instead become a powerful woman, aloof to the presence of power but aware of its importance. Be an ingenious and intelligent and use your creativity to uplift yourself. When you do so it will be hard to ignore you. Even the powerful will become an ally.
Enjoy moments of solitude. Use that time to develop yourself, improve your body, learn new skills, create with your mind, read widely, become more elegant, then launch yourself.
Remember the most powerful women are the most intelligent. Inspired by Robert Greene's 48 Laws of Power. Use at your discretion.
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“souls don’t meet by accident”
when it’s time for two souls to meet, there is nothing on this earth that can prevent them from uniting with each other ♡
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"For you, a thousand times over."
The Kite Runner by Khalid Hosseini
Afghanistan
Alex Manne
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50 Reflective Questions
1. Imagine that you could send a letter back in time to your younger self. What would your message say, and to which year would you address it?
2. Growing up, what was one of your favorite family traditions? Describe what made this time extra special.
3. Describe the most adventurous thing you have ever done. If you were given the opportunity, would you do this again?
4. In your opinion, what is one mistake your parents made in raising you? How will you do things differently with your own children?
5. What is one thing your parents did right in raising you? Why was this so meaningful?
6. Describe a time in your life when you felt especially close to God. Why do you think you felt so close to Him during that season of life?
7. What are you currently doing to nurture yourself spiritually? Are there spiritual activities you did in the past that you miss?
8. If you could visit anywhere in the world, where would it be, and why?
9. Growing up, what were some of your favorite childhood toys and television shows?
10. Describe one accomplishment you are especially proud of.
11. What do you think is the most significant quality of lasting friendships? How do you demonstrate these qualities yourself?
12. Who is your best friend right now? What is it that you like most about this friend?
13. In your opinion, why do so many marriages fail?
14. What is one food you would happily eat every day for the next year?
15. What are some of life’s simple pleasures that make you smile?
16. What is one wrong in the world that you are passionate about changing for the better?
17. What do you consider to be your greatest strengths?
18. What do you consider to be your most significant weaknesses?
19. Do you believe that men and women should hold traditional gender roles today (such as the man being the primary “bread-winner” for the family and the woman being a homemaker and primary caregiver for the children)? Why or why not?
20. If you had to choose a career other than the one you are currently in, what job would you pick, and why?
21. If you knew you were going to die at this exact time tomorrow, how would you spend the next twenty-four hours?
22. In your opinion, what is the single most critical ingredient for making a relationship work?
23. What is one of your favorite childhood memories with one or both of your parents? What makes this memory so meaningful to you?
24. What single activity brings you the most joy in life?
25. What life circumstances cause you the most pain?
26. What season of life are you in right now?
27. What are your top priorities right now?
28. How do you feel when you first wake up?
29. What takes up the majority of your time?
30. What thoughts distract you when you’re trying to get to sleep?
31. Do you like your job?
32. How do you spend your spare time?
33. How would you like to spend your spare time?
34. Which aspects of your life are you able to control?
35. What in your life aren’t you able to control? What can you do about that?
36. If you had more time to do what you love, what would you do?
37. What makes you feel optimistic about the future?
38. Are you as confident as you would like? How can you improve your self-confidence?
39. What are you most grateful for?
40. What do you take for granted?
41. What keeps you grounded?
42. What brings you joy?
43. What makes you laugh or smile?
44. What does success look like to you?
45. What motivates you?
46. Who inspires you the most? Why is that?
47. What battles have you fought and overcome in your life?
48. Which have been your best moments in life so far?
49. What have been your biggest mistakes? What have you learned from them?
50. What’s the most spontaneous thing you’ve ever done? How did it make you feel?
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It is said, for those who focus and those whose hearts are truly humbled in prayer are like fish in the water, and those who are not, are like a bird in the cage. ~Read it in a book.
For a fish, water is her home, she knows no limitations on that. A bird in the cage, waits to be freed.
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My biggest fear is being buried six feet deep when I’m nowhere near being the Muslim I want to become. May Allah shower his mercy upon us, and grant us light in the grave.
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Two rakahs when you need something
Two rakahs thanking Allah when you get it.
It will change your life
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"But man is not made for defeat."
"A man can be destroyed..."
"But not defeated."
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"And I entrust my affair to Allah. Indeed, Allah is Seeing
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how to maintain a tahajjud routine
trying to wake up for tahajjud + fajr is something that i've been trying to do consistently, especially as it's winter and the days are shorter. this can be hard with my uni studies/lectures and other commitments when I just want to sleep for longer and not wake up.
however, these are some things that help me form a routine:
sleep early
this means that you're getting enough sleep to not be as tired when you wake up. try and go to sleep around the same time every night so that when you do wake up for tahajjud, your body adjusts over time to this new routine. i tried to be asleep by 11pm and my body naturally started to wake me up around 5-5:30am because of this, alhamdulillah.
setting multiple alarms
i am that girl who will wake up her whole house with alarms before it even wakes her up. if i want to wake up at 5:45, i set them for 5:40, 5:45, 5:50, 6:00 and eventually i get tired of snoozing them all and just get out of bed.
repeating 'prayer is better than sleep' in my head
sometimes it is so tempting to say 'i'll get up in 5 minutes...' and then that 5 minutes turn into 2 hours. when having the urge to say this to myself and close my eyes, i try and battle it by repeating that phrase in my head which reminds me the blessings of salat and helps me get out of bed.
waking up 30 minutes before fajr
by the time i finish praying tahajjud, it is fajr time and i get to complete the first prayer on time as well. this will make it feel easier as you're not waking up in the middle of the night and then going back to sleep and missing fajr or having to wake up for it again - you get to pray both around the same time.
doing something after fajr before a nap
sometimes it's hard to go back to sleep after fajr on the days where I start university late/it's the weekend but i still want some rest. i started to do some reading after fajr to make me sleepy so that in an hour or two, i'd go back to sleep for another 2 hours and wake up feeling well rested and continue with the rest of the day. i'm always the most productive on these days. of course, it depends on your life schedule and what is going on in your life as well.
reading about the blessings of tahajjud
understanding this makes me want to pray tahajjud even more as i know the benefits and beauty of waking up in the middle of the night when everyone else is asleep and Allah has descended to the lowest heaven in the third part of the night. it makes me want to wake up and be close to Him.
these are just what work for me. if these do not work for you, try and see what does and Insha’Allah you will form your own routine. may Allah make it easy for us all, Ameen.
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Next time you part ways, dont say goodbye.
'Au Revoir, Fee Amanillah'
'Until we meet again, I leave you in the care of Allah'
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