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natalicius · 5 months
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natalicius · 5 months
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Day 6 - Song you feel identify with
I could write lots of paragraphs about how meaningful songs are for me… but this time Kodou is the one.
Kodou became a very personal song, it is one of my favourites for sure. For some reason, it gives me peace of mind, beyond that I think Sakurai’s lyricism stands out in this album, it reveals his human sensibility and his ability to shape the invisible.
Since I was a kid, I had the feeling that life is a virtual thing, sort of a dream I had to wake up someday. This has been a recurring thought during my entire life, even in adulthood. Personally, I perceive that the theme of the song is about finding meaning, trying to figure out why we have this physical form and feel this way, even though we will never really know and will live in uncertainty forever.
“I don’t know why I’m living, but even so I want it so badly
I think I want to live, if you’ll love me.”
Despite not understanding life, there is a passionate desire to want to continue here, to be someone and to be loved in order to exist and finally to give meaning to our actions. We seek love, we are moved by love (all kinds of love)… and it is beautiful at the end because it is not a superficial emotion, it exposes how fragile we are.  
I tend to daydream and escape from reality too often, so another message I get from Kodou is to live the present, to stay grounded.
Well, I could add other songs, such as: 
Kingdom Come -moon rise-
Solaris
Tight Rope
見えない物を見ようとする 誤解 全て誤解だ
And a similar theme will be orbiting around, but this one is special. 
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natalicius · 5 months
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Thinking about how we mourn artists we’ve never met. We don’t cry because we knew them, we cry because they helped us know ourselves.
ElusiveJ  (via cumberbuddy)
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natalicius · 5 months
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natalicius · 5 months
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I'd never felt so connected to an artist like this before. I felt moved by his lyrics, as if they were talking directly to my soul. I have said it before, but Sakurai and B-T are home to me, they make me feel understood and safe.
Little by little reading the interviews, I began to know his context, ideas, where he came and it resonated in me much more, "knowing" his thoughts gave more weight and significance to his words.
I have to say that sometimes I related to his darkness and loneliness, he turned the obscure feelings into something haunting. The beauty in darkness, the beauty of being alive despite all the uncertainties and pain. I admire his courage and how he fought his demons. He accepted the odds and tried to enjoy life.
"I don't know why I'm living, but even so I want it so badly"
Even I find it silly and beautiful to share the same birth day with you.
My dear Acchan, you were loved. I wish you could see it, how incredible you were. You were full of love too, your music did a lot for me, it came at the precise moment. Your story helped me to heal some wounds and to accept parts of myself.
I love you and I'll love you forever. I'll never get tired of saying it. Hope you've received tones of colorful and exotic flowers.
"Although nameless, I got to meet you Even nameless, I met butterflies, felt the wind, had dreams..."
Can't thank you enough.
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natalicius · 5 months
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Buck-Tick moments that kill me
Abracadabra Live on the Net, 2020
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natalicius · 5 months
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It fills my heart to see how everyone refers to him with warmth, admiration, kindness and respect.
One of the things I really admire of him was his moments of wisdom, he had interesting thoughts and worldviews, you could learn so much from/of him and life through the interviews. Reading him felt very familiar and it was so rare to have similar ways of thinking/feelings, i appreciate that very much. You could see his qualities and humanity, he was genuine and didn't hide his flaws. He was full of love, he gave us all always. He loved life and loved love, even in his "darkest" lyrics and records, he was moved by it.
More than 36 years giving everything. Thanks for the tenderness, erotism, androgynous vibes, cuteness. Keep dreaming.
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natalicius · 5 months
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BUCK-TICK TOUR THE BEST 35th anniv. FINALO in Budokan 2022.12.29
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natalicius · 5 months
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Next, I’d like to ask about the word “dream”. Sakurai-san has also sung about all types of dreams in in the past, but it’s rare that you would pen a phrase like, “chasing things like dreams (夢なんて追いかけて/yume nante oikakete)”.
S: Right, we started the band together but for some reason, I myself didn’t really have any goals. I was going along without specific goals like knowing what we wanted to become, or wanting to perform at a particular venue. Just happy to be able to transiently enjoy each day, firing up the audience even with shitty performances. There was a negligent and carefree part of me that didn’t care about the future as long as I could spend another night like that. I guess I genuinely thought having fun playing music in a band like that was enough. Except, I gradually started to wonder, “So, what am I going to do next?”…… I guess you could say that I finally woke up from a dream (lol).
――Hahahaha.
S: I just suddenly started to wonder, “So what do I want to do?” You know? I thought, if my first phase was me voicing my desire to be a vocalist then I have to move on to the second phase. And that’s my personal desire when it comes to our releases. That kept on sprouting and growing. And I guess I just couldn’t convince myself with the surface-level thing anymore. Wondering, “What should I myself sing about going forward?” That’s when I felt like I finally woke up from my dream.
――Right now, does Sakurai-san have a dream of your own?
S: Huh?...... Perhaps a peaceful retirement.
――Hahahahaha! Will that lifestyle involve band activities?
S: Ah, well, perhaps within the realm of “Oh, the weather looks good today, shall we give it a go?” as an elderly man.
――Depending on the weather!
S: Hahahahah. Saying things like, “My leg hurts.’ (Lol) This isn’t something that would make headlines, but I would like to attain happiness as a person.
――Yes. One more thing I would like to bring up is the imagery of “flowers” that come up in the songs Na mo Naki Watashi (I, Nameless), Ai no Harem (Harem of Love), and Campanella  Hanataba wo Kimi ni (Campanella  A Bouquet For You). It’s something that appears to symbolise life and peace, and also love.
S: Yes. I, as a man who’s over 50 years of age, actually like flowers a lot.
Translation by: jrockarchiv.es Full interview
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natalicius · 5 months
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Namonaki Watashi | TOUR 2023 異空-IZORA- FINALO
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natalicius · 5 months
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natalicius · 5 months
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Legends Never Die
I'm sitting here, watching the rain rustle the golden leaves free. Watching them fall like so many fallen stars. I'm glad it's not sunny today. I don't think I could bear it in light of the news that's shaken the B-T fandom.
My feelings have been echoed already by so many. Grief, sadness, shock, devastation, heartbreak. Gratitude for what was while lamenting what can no longer be.
Like Imai said on his Instagram, you know this day will come but . . . you never imagine it will be so soon.
I've been mulling over what to write, what to say. But what can I say? He was so much to so many.
For me, Sakurai was the light at the end of a dark tunnel. He was color in a world of grey. A songbird. A steady hand when I felt myself crumbling . . . a kind heart when my own felt fragmented, and a compassionate ear, listening to my sorrows with patience when I fumbled through trying to make sense of anything.
His words have comforted me, inspired me.
He was a kindred spirit.
My heart feels his loss like I've lost a part of myself. There's a hollowness now, an ache that cannot be diminished. His voice awoke something in me, the will to live really. It would be so easy now to say that with him gone, there's no point. No more purpose. The world is ashen. That's my grief talking. I know there's still a point because he existed, because he lived, and he shared his voice and stories with the world.
It hurts. But I made a promise, and I intend to keep it.
I said I would live.
And I will.
And when I see things that remind me of him I will say his name.
When I experience beauty, when I taste something delicious, when I savor a good glass of wine, when I look at the moon, when I smell the rain, when the snow falls just so . . . I will think of him, and I will smile, and I will say, "Isn't this beautiful, Acchan? It's for you."
And I will feel a little less lonely in my heart knowing that he is free now. He can be anywhere. He can be with all of us. He can be the rain, he can sing with the wind.
He can dance with the stars, and he can be reunited with those he's loved and lost.
As we will be with him one day again.
But not yet. I have a promise to keep.
Until then . . .
夢で会える. 夢で会える. 待っています.
永遠 . . .
My love is for always. 💙💙💙
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natalicius · 5 months
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natalicius · 5 months
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Thank you Atsushi and B-T for creating a magical realm of safety, beauty and joy in the midst of this cruel world❤️‍🩹💫🌒🪐✨
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Since finding out the news of Atsushi Sakurai’s passing I’ve had so many thoughts and emotions that it’s taken me until now to begin to sort them all out. I first began listening to Buck-Tick several years ago and have fallen more in love with the band and their music as time goes on. …Occasionally, you’ll come across a band or an artist that embodies a feeling of magic. For me Sakurai and Buck-Tick are just such a band, and in the time that I’ve listened to them, I have experienced so much magic from their music and have so many memories that are connected to their songs. Whether it’s memories of my late grandfather and father whenever I listen to Angelic Conversation or Message, and the comfort I found from Buck-Tick's music during that time. Or the magic of watching the beauty of the sunrise while listening to Cosmos, and of taking in the landscape of the countryside while driving through it with any number of Buck-Tick’s songs playing on my car’s radio. I also think of the magic of being inspired by Buck-Tick’s music while writing my stories and listening to them as I bring scenes to life with words. Or in coming up with ideas for modifying the shirts I’ve purchased from their website to make a unique piece of clothing for myself, and in some small way having my own creativity fused with that of Sakurai and Buck-Tick. Which in itself is a very special sort of magic. I’ve sometimes heard that magic is a form of energy, and if so then it can never be destroyed but only change form. So now rather than being embodied by Sakurai himself, a piece of that magic will continue on as long as he is remembered and as new and old fans continue to listen to and enjoy the art he created during his lifetime.
Thank you for all the magic you have given to me and all the other fans of Buck-Tick, and may you rest in peace Atsushi Sakurai.
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natalicius · 5 months
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natalicius · 5 months
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I usually try to refrain from being too emotional on this blog (as of lately, at least).
I didn't think that Sakurai's passing would affect me as much. I've been listening to their songs, especially Jupiter, and crying. I feel like I've lost something so dear and intimate to me.
This may not make much, or even any sense to many. But when a band or a single artist touch your whole being as much as BT did... it hurts a lot.
I hope he knew how incredible he was, how many lives he touched. I hope he knew that he was a pivotal part of Japan's music history and VK scene. I hope he knew that people outside of Japan cherished him as well and were in awe of his kindness, intelligence, creativity and beauty.
I hope the remaining members of BT are able to navigate these tragic times as good as possible and I hope that they are able to smile, remembering Atsushi's unique presence throughout the span of almost 40 years.
I am in no ways extremely knowledgeable when it comes to BT, there are people in this community that know so much more than me and seeing them share their stories and whatnot has been so heartwarming.
To all of us still trying to grapple with the fact that Acchan has now passed, let's all keep him alive in our hearts and ears. His legacy is immortal, even though he was mortal.
You will always be singing in our hearts.
Also, thank you @natalicius for your words of comfort. 🖤 And take care.
Everyone, let's take care of ourselves.
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natalicius · 5 months
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CLIMAX TOGETHER | TOUR 2023 異空-IZORA- FINALO
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