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I started meal prepping a month ago so that I don’t have to cook everyday. It’s been helping a lot. I get to eat healthy everyday and I’m really happy to see my kitchen clean the whole week. I’m not focussing on losing weight yet. My brain can’t take it. I’m just trying to find a good stratigy to stick to first. I’m Thai living in the Netherlands, by the way.
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The causes of my burnout
- I took on too many students per week. At first I thought that it wouldn’t hurt because it was just an 1-hour lessen per student. But I was wrong. It means that I will now have to connect with more people and absorb more (negative) energy unwillingly and unnecessarily. (I’m an empath, so)
- I often feel useless when I’m the only one who “try” and the other person is just there to see me try “to help them”. I even feel used sometimes.
- Some of my students have become an energy vampire. They drain me like a pro. They suck my happiness, energy, and attention right out of me. Actually I allow it myself. I’m a people pleaser. I can never hurt people.
- I’m annoyed by the fact that people on fb are so excited about this person who claims to teach people because it feels good. This person doesn’t even take time to educate herself and to correct her knowledge. It’s all for attention. But who am I to judge them. I decided myself to stay in the background and try to write good books and make good lesmaterials. And I am the one eho put myself in this shitty situation where I let myself get drained and never have enough time and energy to create!
- And I’m also stressed about going back to Thailand to visit my family for the 1st time in 6 years. Why? Because I have too many trauma’s thanks to them. That’s why.
I’ve found out a month ago that I might have ADD. When I think about it, the vicious circles of burnout that I have been having all my life start to make more sense! And I want to talk with my huisarts about this. But my anxiety is too high I don’t know what to do. And I dont know how long this burnout is gonna take. I’m just tired of living on a survival mode and a burnout mode everyday. I’m like a broken battery that can never be fully charged again.
I love teaching and helping people, but I need to figure out a new way to do it without burning myself out.
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เหนื่อย
เหมือนแบตเสื่อม ชาร์จเท่าไหร่ก็ไม่เต็ม บางทีเหมือนชาร์จเข้า แต่พอเริ่มใช้งานก็ดับอีก เบิร์นเอาท์รอบนี้หนักอยู่นะ ที่แย่คือ เราต้องทนลากยาวไปอีกหลายเดือนเลย
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