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mischiefsemimanaged · 15 days
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You are not an imposter for using accommodations or aids you could “do without”. You are not an imposter for doing what you need to make things easier on yourself. Just because you technically could walk without a cane doesn’t mean you should have to endure the additional pain. Just because you are capable of grocery shopping during busy times doesn’t mean you should have to endure the anxiety.
If an accommodation, aid or something else helps improve your quality of life and/or even just makes things easier for you, you deserve to be able to use it without having to justify it to yourself.
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mischiefsemimanaged · 20 days
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me whenever I read smut with the straightest face ever:
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mischiefsemimanaged · 23 days
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mischiefsemimanaged · 3 months
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The Dirt (Your Version)
Summary: Meeting Nikki Sixx and Tommy Lee was a coincidence. Being friends was a choice. But falling in love with them both was beyond your control.
Or
A rewrite of The Dirt with all the highs and lows of Mötley Crüe from your perspective.
Pairings: Nikki Sixx x Reader, Tommy Lee x Reader, Nikki Sixx x Tommy Lee x Reader
Word Count: 4k
Warnings: Past child abuse, language
Previous Chapter
Chapter 7- No Going Back
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Slowly you opened your eyes and found yourself lying on a couch in a dark room.
"What..." You mumbled struggling to figure out what was going on as you blinked in effort to clear the blurriness.
"Easy. Easy. How do you feel?" Vince's voice whispered before he appeared beside you with a glass of water and a sad but relieved expression. "It's okay. You're in my dressing room. You passed out."
Frowning in confusion you glanced around the dark room and realised that, yeah, you were in your brothers dressing room. He had turned all the lights off except for a small lamp across the room which had been pointily shifted, so it wasn't in your line of sight.
Your head was aching, but it was no longer thumping in a sharp pain, so you were silently grateful for that.
Wait, did Vince say that you passed out?
"You scared the crap out of like 30,000 people tonight." Your brother explained.
Oh, God. You fainted on stage?
Vince smiled softly noticing your sudden embarrassment and he shook his head.
"Don't worry about it."
"I can't believe I did that." You sighed, covering your face with your hands. "I'm sorry for ruining the show."
"None of that. You didn't ruin anything. The fans still got their show afterwards."
You lowered your hands from your face and glanced over at your brother who held out the glass of water with a questioning look.
"Thanks."
Carefully you sat yourself up, the room momentarily spinning, and Vince must have noticed too because he grabbed your shoulder as you sat there and blinked until the room came to a halt.
"You with me?" He asked carefully.
"Yeah."
You grabbed the glass with shaky hands and took a small sip while Vince remained knelt beside the couch watching you worriedly.
"Want me to grab an icepack for your head?"
"You don't have to-" You began to say knowing you had caused him enough trouble as it was, but he was already on his feet and out the door before you could finish the sentence.
You sighed and leant back against the couch and a few seconds later the dressing room door opened slowly, and Tommy stuck his head inside.
"You're awake!" He called out happily causing you to wince at the loud volume of his voice and he quickly put his hand over his mouth in realisation. "Sorry. Sorry."
"It's okay."
"How are you feeling?" He asked, walking into the room with Mick following.
"Better." You answered honestly.
"Shit, kid. You gave us one hell of a fright." Mick admitted.
"Sorry."
"Don't apologise, dude. We're just glad that you're okay." Tommy reassured, glancing over his shoulder to where Nikki was leaning against the doorframe.
"C'mon, we should let her rest." Mick said, patting Tommys back before the two of them walked out the room.
Nikki stepped to the side allowing them through the door before he leant back against the doorframe with his arms folded across his chest. He didn't say anything for a moment, his smoky eyes glued to yours from across the room and if you weren't mistaken, he looked a little shook up.
"You okay, Sixx?" You asked hesitantly, unsure what else to say because he clearly wasn't okay.
What happened when you were unconscious?
"You shouldn't have gone on stage." He simply stated as if that wasn't bluntly obvious already.
"Yeah, I kinda figured that out. Sorry I ruined your show."
"I don't care about the show. I care about you-" Nikki cut himself off quickly and ducked his head to avoid your gaze. "Just don't do that again, okay?"
"I'm not planning on it." You answered, still a little confused at how he was acting.
He tilted his head back up looking at you from behind his hair with a small nod before he turned and walked out the room leaving you sitting there in confusion.
A few minutes later, Vince returned with an icepack and flicked on the small television across the room after Doc apparently told him that Mötley Crüe were making headlines on the news.
He sat on the couch, and you laid back down resting your head in his lap while he held the icepack against your forehead and watched the news silently together. The news reporter was talking about some environmental issue across the country, and you were nearly asleep before you heard the band's name.
"Mötley Crüe still on tour with the Prince of Darkness had an alarming incident during their live show tonight. We cross over to Amy Greenwood who has the details."
Oh, no.
They didn't have footage of you collapsing on stage, did they?
"That's right, Melissa. Mötley Crüe's new backup singer, Y/N Neil, collapsed on stage during their Osbourne tour this afternoon." The reported began to say before the TV flicked over to grainy footage of the show.
You covered your face with your hands peaking between your fingers while you watched yourself collapse on the side of the stage during Micks guitar solo. Tommy was already on his feet behind the drums before you even fell. He must have been watching you prior to it and noticed something was wrong.
You were surprised to find that it was Nikki who grabbed you before you could hit the ground, saving you just in the nick of time before you could smash your head on the hard stage floor.
The crowd all gasped in sync and Mick quickly stopped playing the guitar which caught your brother's attention. He looked over at the guitarist in confusion but when he saw Mick staring at something with wide panicked eyes, he dropped the microphone pole and spun around to find you unconscious in Nikkis arms.
You had never heard a Mötley Crüe concert sound so silent before. The music had stopped instantly, and the strobe lights were no longer flashing. Even the crowd had turned from cheering and screaming to eerily silent as they watched on in shock.
"Shit." You whispered to yourself utterly embarrassed by the whole thing as you continued to watch the footage.
Vince sprinted across the stage and skidded to his knees beside you where Nikki had laid you down shouting over his shoulder for a medic while Tommy paced nearby looking absolutely terrified.
Nikki and Vince shared a few words before the bassist picked you up and carried you off stage, the rest of the guys hurriedly following. The crowd of fans completely forgotten about and abandoned.
"It is unknown the cause of the incident, but sources have confirmed that she is alright. The same can't be said for her older brother, lead singer, Vince Neil, who was thrown into a panic when his sister collapsed and his performance after the incident wasn't the same."
The footage then cut to the guys entering the stage again, this time without you, and the news reporter was right, the show wasn't the same. Vince was clearly rattled after the incident. He wasn't singing half as enthusiastically as usual, Tommy, Nikki and Mick all uncharacteristically quiet with their instruments, but still played well and gave the crowd their money's worth. To anyone else, they might have not noticed the slight difference, but you could.
"I'm sorry." You sighed, covering your face back up with your hands in embarrassment.
Vince snorted softly, "don't be. Any press is good press. It's gotten our name back on the news for people to see. But don't go passing out again though."
"Nikki was the one who caught me?" You asked despite just having seen the recorded video of it.
"Yeah. Really freaked him out seeing you faint like that. Hell, it freaked us all out."
Well, that explained his behaviour earlier.
-
The migraine came and went quickly enough and the following night you were back on stage with the boys singing and rocking out to the music like nothing had happened.
You dodged news reporters and cameras like the plague not wanting to speak to anyone knowing they would ask about the incident, but the world didn't need to know about your migraines. It was nobody else's business.
Mötley and Ozzy continued to move from city to city for shows leaving a trail of wreck and destruction in their wake.
Hotel rooms got totally ruined. Lights broken, televisions smashed, rooms even burnt due to fireworks. You were pretty sure Ozzy had smeared literal poo over Tommy's bathroom at one stage, but you weren't around for that (thank goodness) and you didn't dare ask about it. The less you knew about what those guys got up too, the better.
Mötley Crüe had sold over a million albums. And were making more money than they'd ever imagined. And they spent it even faster.
Cars, drugs, houses. Everything.
The Mötley House was a thing of the past. You all had your own individual homes with the money the band was raking in.
It was surprising how much you actually missed living in that old shitty apartment with the guys. Although you didn't miss your brothers snoring in the bedroom or walking in on every single one of them in the bathroom because nobody seemed to understand the concept of a lock.
You had bought a small beachfront cottage on the outskirts of town away from the busy city and large crowds. Vince then bought the huge mansion a few houses down along the beachfront as well. His new girlfriend quickly turned wife, Sharise, moving in with him instantly.
Sharise seemed like a nice woman. She was a lot better than some of the other women your brother had dated in the past. So, you were happy for them.
"Hey, Y/N! Come meet my parents!" Tommy's voice suddenly called out.
Whoa, wait. Did he just say parents?
Slowly you turned from where you had been walking past the set that was getting decorated for the Looks that Kill music video and instantly spotted Tommy across the room with two older people.
Oh, okay. It was actually his parents.
"Umm, hi. I'm Y/N. It's a pleasure to meet you." You said putting on a bright smile as you jogged over to them and held your hand out.
You weren't sure if his parents remembered you or not. You hoped they didn't. The last time you saw them was when they found you and Vince sleeping in the back of Tommys van next to their house all those years ago.
His father shook your hand with a smile and nod, but his mother soon wrapped you up into a tight hug that came out of nowhere.
"It's so nice to finally see you again." She whispered in your ear.
Well, she definitely remembered you.
Awkwardly, you hugged the woman back still a little shocked at the unexpected hug. But you soon melted into the embrace, not realising how much you actually needed a simple hug from a mother.
You never met your real mother. Well, you did, but you were a baby. And although you loved your stepmother dearly, you hated her at the same time for putting up with the shit your father used to do.
Your eyes flicked over to Tommys father while you hugged his mother and your heart spiked with jealousy at how caring and loving they seemed to be. This was what a family was supposed to be. It wasn't supposed to be filled with hateful looks, raised voices and fists.
You struggled to remember the last time you had been hugged by a parent.
Hell, you hadn't seen your father or stepmother since the day you and Vince ran away from home as teenagers. That was probably for the best though.
Tommys mother eventually pulled away and looked at you with a warm gentle smile that matched Tommy's identically. His mother was a beautiful woman, he took after her quite a bit.
"Tommy has told us so much about you." His father began to say which caught you off guard.
"He has?" You asked, glancing over at Tommy who was now blushing and shaking his head.
"Dad!" He whined softly reminding you of a child being embarrassed by their parents and you smiled.
"I would have been offended if you hadn't talked about me, Drummer." You responded trying to make him feel less embarrassed as you patted his shoulder. "So how long are you two visiting?"
"Just for the weekend. Tommy wanted to give us a tour and introduce us to his girlfriend." His mother answered.
Ah, his girlfriend. The little gold-digging bitch who you hated with a passion.
It wasn't even because of your stupid crush on the drummer. Roxy was an actual bitch, and everyone knew it except for Tommy who, as always, fell in love too quickly.
"Can you do me a huge favour and find Roxy for me? I want to keep showing my parents around and I'm not sure where she went." Tommy said, looking around set trying to find his girlfriend.
"Sure." You nodded turning back to his parents and smiling. "It was lovely to see you both."
"Take care dear." His father replied while his mother gave you a loving smile.
Your heart clenched looking at the two wonderful parents before you turned on your heels and rushed off set.
It was stupid to be jealous. But you couldn't help it.
Your mind began to wander back to your not so happy childhood. All the times you and Vince had gotten home from school to find your father high off his face and out of control. All the broken plates and glasses he would throw. All the kitchen cabinet doors he would slam. All the bruises he would leave…
You thought back to living in Tommys van after running away.
-
"Knock, knock." Tommy's voice suddenly said from outside the van.
Vince had gone to grab some clothes from your parents' house while they were away at work, leaving you alone in the van with nothing to do.
"Yeah?" You called out.
"Can I come in?"
You hesitated for a moment, "sure."
Tommy was in your year level at school, but the two of you never really had much to do with each other. Sure, him and Vince would hang out occasionally and jam out in his parent's garage, but that was it.
"I figured you might want this." Tommy said, opening up the back door and holding out an icepack. "How's the head?"
"Fine." You answered automatically but by the small frown on Tommys face it was clear that he didn't believe you in the slightest, but to your relief, he didn't call you out on it.
He handed you the icepack before he sat down at the back of the van giving you some space but not leaving yet. Why he was sticking around was beyond you. Vince wasn't here, why would Tommy want to hang out with you?
You rested the icepack against the side of your forehead with a small wince before leaning back against the wall of the van. Last night him and Vince had found super glue and after cleaning the wound with a first aid kit Tommy got from in his house, the two of them glued the cut shut.
Nobody knew what they were doing but were smart enough to know that they couldn't leave the wound bleeding and couldn't go to the hospital either, so they improvised.
You were used to the aftermath of your father's abuse. Used to the rushing in your head, the drowning in your ears and pain pulsing through your body. You were used to Vince helping you apply bandages. What you were not used to was having someone else other than your brother caring and helping you.
But Tommy cared.
He shouldn't care though. He barely knew you and had no business caring for a girl like you. But for whatever reason, he did.
"What are you doing here Tommy?" You eventually asked breaking the silence.
He shrugged, "it's my van."
Yeah, okay, he had a point.
The two of you fell back into awkward silence and Tommy sat there fiddling with the drumsticks that he seemed to take everywhere with him.
"Did Vince send you here to keep an eye on me?" You asked shortly after.
"No. No, he didn't- yeah, okay, he did." Tommy admitted sheepishly as he looked over at you. "He-he's worried about you. So am I."
"Well don't be."
"Kinda hard not to be when your face looks like that." He answered pointing at you with a drumstick before wincing at his own words. "Uh, no offence. I mean, you're still beautiful and all, but, uh, I'm gonna shut up now."
You smirked ever so slightly, "that's a good idea."
Tommy rubbed the back of his neck almost nervously, his cheeks now a little flushed before he looked back over at you shyly.
"So, uh, what happened?" He asked, motioning to the icepack against your head but you looked away from him. "C'mon, Y/N, I helped glue that cut shut. You can tell me."
The thing was, Tommy wouldn't understand if you told him the truth.
He came from a loving, caring family. His parents were in love and cherished him. Hell, he already told you about how his father asked his mother to marry him the first day they met, and she didn't even speak any English.
He wouldn't understand it. And you didn't want him too either. If he understood then he would pity you, and you did not want his pity.
Tommy didn't try to push for answers after that, seeming to realise that you didn't want to talk about it. So instead, he began to ramble about school and music, and to your own surprise, you found yourself enjoying his company.
-
You could feel yourself getting worked up the more you thought about your father and shitty childhood while walking down the corridor to Tommy's dressing room to find Roxy.
However, you didn't get to reach his dressing room because the door to Nikki's suddenly opened, and the little bitch strolled straight out. Her eyes met yours while wiping away the smudge of her lipstick before she flicked her hair and walked straight past without a word.
Oh, for fuck's sake.
Once the woman was out of earshot you turned to Nikki's still open door to find him adjusting his pants and your worked up mood from earlier reached its boiling point.
"Are you fucking serious?!" You hissed, marching into the room and slamming the door shut behind you.
"Sure, come in." Nikki mumbled sarcastically.
"No. Don't try and be funny. Not after you just fucked Tommy's girlfriend!"
Nikki rolled his eyes, "why do you care?"
"Do you know how hurt Tommy would be if he found out that you, his best fucking friend, had slept with his girlfriend? He'd be heartbroken."
Nikki finally looked over at you, his smoky eyes scanning your face for something before he simply smiled.
"Thought you'd be happy because if I fuck her then you can fuck Tommy. Isn't that what you want?"
Whoa, what?!
"Since fucking when?" You questioned staring at the bassist like he had grown a second head.
"Since you guys slept together after the US Festival."
Your eyes widened, "that has absolutely nothing to do with this."
"You sure about that, princess?"
You took a step towards him, anger rising through your veins.
"Don't call me that."
"I'll call you whatever the fuck I want."
"You're such a fucking hypocrite, you know that, right?" You said, causing Nikki to raise his eyebrows. "You drilled me and Tommy for sleeping together because it had jeopardized the band. But now you're sleeping with Tommy's girlfriend which could jeopardize the band too. Listen to your own fucking advice next time, yeah?"
Nikkis expression hardened, his jaw clenching as he glared at you, and you realised that you must have hit a nerve. Good.
He stormed straight past, his shoulder knocking yours as he marched towards the door, "I don't need to listen to this shit."
"Run away like you always do." You muttered under your breath.
Nikki suddenly whirled around, "the fuck did you just say?"
"Oh, I think you heard me."
Nikki stormed back up to you, his eyes ablaze and body practically vibrating from sudden pent-up anger that was finally coming to the surface. His fists clenched by his side tightly, breathing heavily through his nose.
This was an act you knew all too well. From your father's drunken violence to seeing all the guys in the band lose their aggression on randoms in bars. You knew Nikki was ready to fight, and so were you. So, you held your ground and stood up straight.
"You wanna fucking hit me, Sixx? Do it." You challenged, holding your arms out as an invitation.
You needed to feel something. And as fucked up as it was, you needed him to hit you.
All your anger and jealousy deep inside from seeing Tommys loving parents and all the memories it bought up... you needed this.
Nikki physically recoiled at your words. The anger and rage brewing inside of him subsiding as a look of shocked realisation washed over him.
"You want me to hit you?"
It wasn't a question. He already knew the answer.
You remained silent staring up at him breathing heavily but your silence was enough of a confirmation and Nikki shook his head with a small chuckle of disbelief.
"You're even more fucked up than I am, princess."
"Never claimed not to be." You simply replied, your eyes never leaving his. "So, what are you gonna do about it?"
Suddenly Nikkis lips collided with yours and it took your brain a moment to process what was happening because no way was Nikki Sixx actually kissing you. He hated you. Why would he kiss you?
On instinct, you pulled away and shoved his chest causing him to stumble back a step not expecting your sudden strength.
"Don't act like you didn't enjoy that." Nikki smirked cockily.
"Shut up, Sixx." You whispered reaching forward and grabbing him by the collar of his jacket before pulling him back in for another kiss.
It was rushed and heated but everything you needed.
Nikki's hand cupped the side of your face, his other shifting down to your waist pulling you closer until your chest was pressed against his and he deepened the kiss.
His lips were soft, but the kiss was rough, and unexpected. Your heart was racing a mile a minute trying to register everything that was happening.
"Nikki." You breathed out, breaking the kiss.
"Fuck, princess." He chased your lips and kissed you again before pulling away, resting his forehead against yours as you both closed your eyes breathing heavily.
A few moments of silence passed between you before his lips found their way back to yours and there was purpose in his movements now. Nikki took a few steps backwards carefully yet hurriedly pulling you with him before pushing you down onto the couch.
You leant back on the couch propped up by your elbows as Nikki slotted himself either side of your thighs and leant down over the top of you. He hadn't stopped kissing you, and you had to admit, you didn't want him to.
You could feel Nikki getting hard against you through his leather pants. You reached for his belt and started to undo it slowly waiting for him to protest and when he didn't, you unbuckled it completely. Nikki then dived straight for your shirt and pulled it up over your head and arms in one swift motion before tossing it off to the side.
He reached for your bra as you began to suck on his neck while being mindful not to leave any marks since the music video was due to be shot within the hour. Nikki let out a startled gasp at your lips on his skin, his fingers turning to butter while he struggled with your bra causing you to smirk.
He eventually unclasped the back of your bra, and your belt was hitting the floor soon after that. He ripped his own shirt off which joined the pile of discarded clothes.
Nikki's curious sea green eyes began to roam over your now naked body. Unfortunately, it was not the first time the bassist had seen you naked. There was a week at the Mötley House when the lock on the bathroom door had been broken. Everybody saw everyone naked at least once during that horrible week.
"Are you going to kiss me again or keep staring?" You teased, biting your lip.
His eyes met yours and he smirked before he leant down and captured your lips with his own once again, his other hand moving to your breast while he kissed you needily. His kisses were a reminder that you were here in the present, not trapped in the past. And you needed that reminder more than anything.
Without any thought, you pulled Nikki on top of you, wrapping your legs around his waist. The kiss broke when the two of you needed to breathe but then Nikki was locking his lips with yours once again, deeper this time as your naked bodies fitted together like two perfectly matched puzzle pieces.
You were both exposed. There was no going back now.
-
Next Chapter
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mischiefsemimanaged · 3 months
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you're basically home to me dude but it's not a big deal at all. don't worry about it
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mischiefsemimanaged · 4 months
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god made me bisexual as a gift to all of you, so maybe you should start acting a little more thankful
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mischiefsemimanaged · 4 months
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mischiefsemimanaged · 5 months
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mischiefsemimanaged · 5 months
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mischiefsemimanaged · 5 months
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The kids on TikTok think that just because he was a classic country singer, Johnny Cash was conservative??? My babies he covered a Nine Inch Nails song in his seventies.
Classic country singers (the majority of which came from poor roots) were always talking about how much The Man sucked because they were taking money from poor rural folk. You’re gonna tell me that’s conservative?? Get outta here.
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mischiefsemimanaged · 6 months
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I get it, Tony. I get it.
Tony: I wanted to make fun of stupid people while I got drunk. My two true passions.
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mischiefsemimanaged · 6 months
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tumblr users complaining about tumblr
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mischiefsemimanaged · 6 months
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people who say “I block for spam liking” like damn sorry that you hate joy. Every time someone goes through and likes 3829278 posts on my blog I’m filled with a love and power that you will never know and I pity you
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mischiefsemimanaged · 6 months
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In the early 70s Sesame Street was created with an eye towards educating poor, inner-city children for free, and became a massive hit with all children. In 2016, faced with going off the air forever after facing conservative efforts to destroy public broadcasting since basically its beginning, new episodes became a timed exclusive for premium cable network HBO. In 2022 HBO Max, newly merged with and taken over by reality TV channel Discovery, removed Sesame Street episodes and spin-offs from streaming as a tax write-off and scheme to avoid paying residuals.
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mischiefsemimanaged · 6 months
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Of the 19 hijackers who carried out the Sept 11 attacks:
15 were from Saudi Arabia (a powerful/oil-rich country the U.S. works hard to maintain diplomatic relations with)
2 were from the United Arab Emirates (also a powerful/oil-rich country the U.S. works hard to maintain diplomatic relations with)
1 was from Egypt, 1 from Lebanon.
None of the hijackers were from Iraq.
None of the Sept 11 hijackers were Iraqi.
None of the 9/11 hijackers were from Iraq.
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mischiefsemimanaged · 7 months
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mischiefsemimanaged · 7 months
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Ok this actually made me sob. I’m disabled. I was a disabled kid in school and all of this is so real. These weren’t my exact issues but the ideas of how kids acted around me are the exact same. The way kids would use me to look good. The way friends would disappear when I would explain that I was tired and couldn’t go to the park with them. I wish I had an Eddie.
Thank you for writing this. It makes me feel much less alone.
Crawling to the Finish
Eddie Munson x Disabled Fem!Reader
You have to go back to school while still recovering from surgery. Principal Higgins is determined to make you as comfortable as possible, so he assigns someone to help you get around.
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Four
Warnings: Accurate descriptions of physical disability and everything that goes along with it. Smut post part 2.
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