melanie-adia-of-the-multiverse - Tumblr blog

melanie-adia-of-the-multiverse · 2 years

Text

Rainbows After The Tempest: Chapter 5 & Epilogue

Summary: Even the best of relationships hit a snag once in a while. The important thing to keep in mind is how to untangle the knot and move forward.

Part 3 of Light and Tenderness Verse

Chapter 5 of 5

Pairing: Logicality

Word Count: 4,392

Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Angst/Fluff

Chapter Warnings: Some self-doubt and mentions of/references to arguing/conflict/crying (doesn't actually happen on scene), and I think that's it, really. If there are any I missed I will make sure to add them

Author’s Note: So, as is always the case in writing, we’ve reached the end of another story. It's hard for me to believe that I've actually completed my first multi-chaptered fic (even though it was short), and I'm proud that I accomplished this challenge I set for myself. I'm a little sad as well that it's over, but I guess that just means that I have to move onto my next story, whether it be one in this series or something new entirely. I've already got some other ideas to tinker around with, so I'm sure my writing muscles will be kept busy. :)

As stated in the A/N of my first chapter, I said that there was a very special reason why I wrote this story, and I will divulge it here now. Today happens to be the day when my parents are celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary, a monumental relationship milestone. In a way, I see my parents as Logicality incarnate: my father as Logan but with Patton's sense of humour, and my mother as Patton but with Logan's grumpiness. Different as night and day, constantly clashing but always with love and care for each other. Because of how fundamentally different they are, their union should be an impossibility, and yet here they've managed to make it work up until now. And here I stand as physical proof of their union. Their dedication to each other and their commitment to communication and setting boundaries never ceases to amaze me, and I hope for a union of my own that is as similar to theirs someday. Obviously it's not perfect, and there are some parts of their relationship that I take note of to not do for myself/do differently, but I'm happy and grateful for them that they still love each other, and I hope they continue to do so for many more years.

Anyways, I've rambled on enough. I don't know when I'll next have another story up, but I'll be back soon once I do. Again, if not with this series, then something else. That's not to say that this series is over; inspiration just has to hit me. But I want to come back. I want to keep sharing. I want to keep writing. After many years of neglect, Sanders Sides revived my liking for it, so I want to maintain this momentum while it lasts, hopefully for a long time.

Until then, again, thank you for your time, kind words and interactions, take care, and keep being safe.

AO3 Link

Part 1: AO3 Tumblr

Part 2: AO3 Tumblr

First Previous

Logan was jolted awake from his slumber by a loud shout and banging. He blinked blearily in confusion and immediately bit back a groan at the stiffness and aches in his limbs and muscles he’d rightfully expected. Patton in turn was woken up by Logan’s sudden movement and blinked owlishly.

“Wuzgoin’on?” he mumbled into Logan’s shirt.

Logan reached out a hand to pick up his phone to check the time, wincing at the cracks that ensued in his joints as he noted that it was about 9AM. After slipping his phone into his pocket, he fumbled and managed to get ahold of his glasses and shoved them onto his face. Then he picked up the other pair and held them up in front of Patton, who was in the middle of scrubbing the sleep out of his eyes. Patton accepted them with a thankful hum and slipped them on.

When they opened their eyes properly, Patton and Logan immediately winced in discomfort and swapped glasses.

“Man, we really seem to have a bad habit of doin’ that,” said Patton once both of their visions cleared.

Logan covered his mouth with a hand to stifle a yawn. “You know, I’ve often seen Thomas’ artistically-inclined fans depicting you with circular-shaped glasses in their artwork. If you ever decide to do another wardrobe change, that could be a possible consideration.”

Patton pursed his lips and rested his chin on top of Logan’s sternum as he considered Logan’s suggestion. “Yeah, I’ve seen those, too. And I do like the idea. But…honestly, I kinda like how we have the same glasses.”

Logan chuckled and reached up to brush Patton’s waves out of his face. “Honestly, me too.”

Patton beamed at Logan and nuzzled into Logan’s touch. Logan smiled back at Patton fondly, stroking his cheek with his index finger.

The sweet moment was short-lived, however, due to more loud commotion upstairs, making them remember why they’d woken up in the first place. From the tone, they were able to tell that it was Roman doing the yelling.

“What is going on up there?” Logan muttered, looking up in the direction of the stairs.

Patton followed his gaze, looking apprehensive. “I hope it’s nothing bad,” he said worriedly.

Logan rolled his eyes. “Remus probably pulled a prank on Roman during the night and Roman’s just found out.”

Then they heard another voice join in with Roman’s. Not as loud but just as surprised at whatever it was they were surprised about. Virgil’s. The couple shared a look with each other.

Then they heard footsteps thundering along the upstairs hallway and down the stairs until Roman came into view, a bewildered expression on his face. He stopped short on the landing when he spotted Logan and Patton lying on the couch.

“Teach! Padre! Why’re you down here? Did you – y’know what, never mind. Not important. Did you see it?!”

“See what?”

“The thing!”

“Thing? What ‘thing’? What are you talking about?”

“C’mon, c’mon! Come look!”

Roman rushed forward and all but yanked Logan and Patton off of each other and the couch (both Sides forgot sometimes the extent of Roman’s strength). Then the princely trait hurried back up the stairs, pulling the heart-mind pair along with him. The couple had to take care to not trip over themselves in the wake of Roman’s haste since they were still in their socks, having not had time to put their shoes back on.

“Kiddo! Slow down! What’s going on?”

“No time! You’ll see!”

As they rushed down the hallway, they saw Virgil standing in the distance, looking just as bewildered as Roman.

“Roman, will you please explain what’s –”

But Logan didn’t get to finish his sentence, as right at that point, Roman came to a halt and gestured wildly at the wall in front of them. And what he and Patton saw made them stop short and stare.

Between their respective individual doors…was a new door.

A door whose colour was an eye-catching marbling of indigo and cyan.

A door with the words ‘L & P’ engraved into the wood. The ‘L’ in a bold block, the ‘P’ in bubble font, and the ‘&’ in wavy calligraphy. Mismatched yet well-matched.

And below the engraving, an insignia of a cartoony heart-shaped brain with glasses.

Logan gaped, face fully open with shock and arms hanging limply by his sides. Patton was the same, save for covering his mouth with one of his hands. He reached out his other hand towards the door, trembling fingers scant inches away from the brightly-coloured wood but not daring to touch it for fear that it might disappear the moment his fingertips brushed against it.

“Is…is this…how – what –”

Patton broke off, too stunned to continue. Logan stayed silent, his head trying to process what he was seeing.

“I don’t know, Padre, –” said Roman, “– like, how it got here and why, but…you’re not imagining it.”

“We thought we did,” Virgil chimed in finally, taking a few tentative steps forward from where he’d been leaning against the opposite wall. “Ro and I actually thought that a new Side had formed, which woulda been weird considering Thomas is, like, a full-grown man and should have his personality fully formed by now. But then we looked closer, and saw the colour and icon, and…yeah.”

Logan and Patton said nothing, but exchanged a look with each other. And in that moment, the realization of what this really meant hit them.

This was their door. Their room. Somehow, when they came together and emerged stronger and on more solid ground after their fight, they solidified their status and connection as a couple, which resulted in the Mindscape manifesting a room just for them.

They looked back at the door again, unsure of what to do. Then they felt Roman gently shove them forward from behind.

“Well, what are you waiting for? Go take a look!”

Logan and Patton looked at each other again, before taking a breath.

Then, with each placing a hand on the doorknob, they cautiously opened the door together and stepped inside.

Initially, only darkness greeted them, which confused them for a moment before they realized that there needed to be light. So, in perfect unison, without even thinking about it or consulting each other, they raised their hands and clapped twice.

Immediately they squinted at the sudden bright lighting and had to wait for their visions to adjust. Once they did, they took a look around.

Their jaws dropped at the sight that greeted them.

The first thing that struck them was how spacious the room was. Not overly so; just right for two people.

Then the colour was the next thing they noticed. The walls were the same colour as their door but in a paler shade, replete with voluminous puffs of cloud-like, swirly patterns. Somehow, it alternately gave the room a feeling of softness and tranquility. Softness for comfort. Tranquility for focus.

Then other aspects of the room caught their attention, one by one.

Furniture in varying shades of steel grey.

A double bed with matching bedside tables and lamps on either side of it.

White plush carpeting, soft beneath their still-socked feet.

Fairy lights twinkling along the tops of the walls.

Shelves of books and stuffies alike, accompanied by a sturdy armchair and a squishy beanbag.

Sparkling star-like lights mimicking the night sky on the ceiling.

And doors leading not only to their own bathroom, but also to Logan’s study and library, Patton’s ‘quiet corner’ and ‘mess space’ (where he did his arts and crafts), as well as their individual rooms.

Logan and Patton turned around slowly on the spot in the middle of the room, taking in every feature, picking out details that reminded them of themselves or each other. There was so much to look at and process.

This room – their room – encompassed everything that defined them individually and as a pair. A shared space of the Mindscape all for themselves and themselves alone. To seek refuge and comfort when it all got too much. They still had access to their original rooms when needed, but this room now existed as a neutral zone for them to coexist together.

All in all, it was perfect.

Logan turned towards Patton, feeling a little shaky from all this.

“Patton –”

But Logan was cut off by Patton throwing himself at him and locking lips with him. He could feel Patton trembling in his hold.

Looks like he wasn’t the only one feeling overwhelmed by this new development.

Logan wrapped his arms around Patton and brought him closer, applying sufficient pressure in his embrace to help ground Patton in his emotional state. Instantly Logan felt the prickly tension leave him as he lost himself in the kiss, and he felt Patton’s trembling die down as well. They let themselves be in the moment and recenter before pulling back.

Patton beamed up at Logan, the intensity of his light almost rivaling the Sun’s. Relieved, Logan grinned back at him then gently pressed their foreheads together, closing his eyes. Patton did the same, giving a couple of nuzzles for good measure. Once again, they felt the world slow down around them and stay still, leaving only them. The intangible completeness from before returned, cupping them gently and carrying them upward.

Their quiet moment was interrupted by a brisk rapping at their door, left ajar after they’d entered.

“Hey! Can we come in now, or what?” an impatient voice called out.

Patton chuckled and Logan rolled his eyes.

“If you must,” he deadpanned, but he was smiling.

The door opened fully and Roman and Virgil peered in before entering, eyes and mouths wide with surprise and awe. To the couple’s surprise, Janus and Remus followed after them, Remus looking around the room with his head cocked in curiosity and Janus doing the same with ill-disguised indifference.

As the others admired and inspected every part of their new room as much as they had, Logan and Patton stood in the middle, Patton’s arms around Logan’s waist and Logan’s hand on Patton’s upper back. They looked at each other and shared a smile, warmth and love swirling in their chests. Then they all headed downstairs together to prepare breakfast, the promise of a new day ahead of them.

*******

That night, Patton and Logan cuddled in their new bed together, savouring their first night in their new room. Earlier they’d discovered that one side of the bed was as soft as a cloud just like how Patton liked it when he was sleeping, whilst the other side was firm to the touch just the way Logan preferred it. Yet another way the Mindscape had designed the room according to their preferences and needs.

And thus, that was how they laid: Patton on the right, Logan on the left, Side by Side. Patton lazed against Logan as he browsed through his phone, while Logan read a book with an arm around Patton, gently drawing shapes into Patton’s shoulder.

“Honey?”

Logan mentally marked the section of the chapter he was reading and looked down at his beloved. “Yes, love?”

“Can we…talk? About something?”

Logan studied Patton’s face. He was still looking at his phone but Logan noticed how Patton’s eyes were slightly unfocused, not really registering what he was reading or watching or whatever-ing on his phone. He was also nibbling the side of his mouth, a ‘tell’ Logan had come to learn as a sign when Patton wanted to broach a topic but was having difficulty initiating it.

“Of course.”

Patton nodded and turned off his phone, placing it on his bedside table. Logan did the same with his book on his own. Then Patton shifted himself so that he was sitting up properly but still leaning against Logan, and he let his head rest on Logan’s shoulder.

“Thank you, for last night.”

Logan curled his arm around Patton more and pulled him in closer. “Of course, darling. I’m glad that it was helpful for you.”

Patton nodded, then fell silent. But Logan could tell that he wasn’t done, if the continued worrying of his lips was any indication. Patton was trying to find his words. So, Logan rubbed Patton’s back while he waited, creating the space for Patton to step in and speak up.

Eventually, Patton inhaled through his nose and exhaled out his mouth before beginning. “So…I’ve been thinking –”

Logan quirked an eyebrow. “A dangerous pastime?”

Patton snorted at this and lightly swatted Logan’s arm. “That’s not what I was going for!”

“Apologies. I couldn’t resist.”

Patton continued to chortle, and Logan smiled at the way his sweetheart’s face scrunched up with mirth when he laughed. He made a mental note to try to make it happen more often.

When Patton’s giggles died down, he sighed and propped his chin on top of Logan’s shoulder, looking at his sunshine over the top of his glasses. “That was a good one.”

Logan took a moment to preen at Patton’s praise, then he reached out to gently push Patton’s glasses up his nose before replying.

“Anyways, I interrupted you. Go on, dear.”

Patton nodded and gathered up his thoughts again. Logan took the opportunity to lightly run his fingers through Patton’s hair as he waited.

Finally, Patton continued. “So, I was thinking…about yesterday.”

Logan nodded, letting out a hum to indicate that he was paying attention. Patton – beginning to feel a crick in his neck from it stretching out unnaturally – shifted his head so that it was laying on Logan’s shoulder again, his gaze falling on the way his hand was resting on top of Logan’s stomach.

“I’m…glad that we were able to work through it. And I wanna say and hope that it won’t happen again. But…I know that’s not possible. That’s not realistic. It’s just how it is in relationships. Nothing is perfect, even if you’re really compatible with each other. It’s gonna happen time and time again. Though, hopefully not as bad as yesterday. I guess I just…wish, kinda, that it didn’t happen. ‘Cause I don’t like it when it does. And I don’t like it when something like yesterday happens. Again, I realize that’s just the way it is sometimes, but…it doesn't feel good.”

Logan’s face softened at this and he bent down to place a kiss on Patton’s forehead. “Your thoughts and feelings are understandable. It was unpleasant for me as well. I don’t think most people in relationships enjoy arguing with their significant others. But, as you said, conflicts in relationships are inevitable, whether they’re major or minor, so the key is figuring out how to handle them when they arise.”

Patton nodded. “Yeah. That’s sorta what I was thinkin’, too. That we should, I dunno, come up with a plan so we don’t blow up at each other again next time.”

Even though I still wish there weren’t a next time, thought Patton, but he let the thought pass. He’d already voiced it out loud, and he knew that wishful thinking wasn’t going to magically prevent whatever they were going to clash on next time, as much as his fears were valid.

Patton’s wandering mind was brought back to the present when he heard Logan speak up.

“I think making a plan is a good step to take. Do you have any ideas?”

Patton looked up at Logan. “Me?”

Logan nodded. “As Thomas’ ‘heart’, you tend to have a good grasp on what needs to be taken care of emotionally. So, I trust you with whatever you have to offer in terms of steps either of us can take to ensure less strife in the future.”

Patton blinked again at Logan before nodding and falling into thought. Logan waited patiently as always, having faith in his beloved’s wisdom when it came to emotional matters.

“I think –” Patton began, “– that I did the right thing stepping away into my room, giving myself some space and time before you came along to talk to me. So, how about we do that? If we get into another fight to the point that we start getting angry, we make a sign to each other to take a break, go to our rooms, or this room even, if we want, and take time to ourselves to calm down. And then, we try talking again later when we’re less likely to blow up?”

Logan parsed Patton’s words in his head for a moment, and Patton waited for Logan to give his opinion (read: approval), biting his lip as his heart fluttered nervously.

Then Logan gave Patton a big smile and leaned forward to kiss him on the cheek. “I think that’s an excellent idea.”

Patton’s heart soared at this, and he wrapped his arms fully around Logan, snuggling into him further.

They stayed in this intimate embrace for a bit, relishing in the warmth and closeness. Then Patton heard Logan say:

“You know, I just thought of something else to solidify what you just said. Some ‘details’, so to speak, as a way for us to adhere to this ‘guideline’ you just came up with, no matter how tense things get.”

“Really? What?”

Logan took Patton’s hand in his, and started playing around with how many ways they could interlock their fingers before turning into pretzel shapes. “I think what we did yesterday – the whole video-watching activity – was a good way to relax after our disagreement, and we were able to sleep better since we’d taken the time to share what had been bothering us individually. So, how about we set up a time so that, up until then, we can air any grievances we have with each other, and when we hit the time limit, that’s when we stop?”

Patton cocked his head to one side, thinking this through. “Sounds good so far. Did you have something specific in mind?”

Logan nodded and continued. “Say we choose, I don’t know, 8pm as the time when we stop talking about anything that might be emotionally charged or draining. So, up until 8pm, we have that time to do whatever we need to do to resolve whatever conflict we get into, and then, from 8pm onwards, we do something together to relax and spend time with each other. That way, our sleep quality won’t be tarnished by any lingering resentful feelings and we can start anew.”

Patton looked at Logan, then he thought about Logan’s proposal. After a few minutes, he looked back up at Logan and smiled. “That sounds fantastic.”

Logan beamed back at him, pride swelling in his chest, and they shared a kiss to seal the deal before settling down for one last cuddle before sleeping.

After a while, Logan looked down to suggest to Patton that it was probably time to go to sleep, and he paused when he noticed the faraway look in Patton’s eyes, the corners of his mouth turned slightly downwards.

“Something on your mind, dearheart?”

Patton jumped at Logan’s voice, evidently having been so deep in thought, and he looked up at Logan before giving a fixed smile and opening his mouth to reply.

“If you’re going to say that ‘nothing’s wrong’, refrain from that.”

Patton froze and immediately closed his mouth before dropping eye contact.

Logan immediately felt bad and used a hand to lift Patton’s chin up, giving him a reassuring smile.

“I’m sorry, love. I didn’t mean to be so blunt. It’s fine if you don’t want to say anything. Just know that whatever you have to say, I will listen, and I will not judge. No matter how big or small it is.”

Patton blinked twice before giving a nod and a sigh. “I know. I need to work on not doing that.”

Logan kissed Patton’s forehead. “It’s okay. It’s the same thing with me needing to work on my temper. We’re both going to make missteps along the way, and there’s nothing wrong with that, so long as we continue to work on them.”

Patton nodded before closing his eyes and exhaling. “It’s just…we already discussed it and I still know that there’s no point in worrying about it since it hasn’t happened yet and that it may never happen, but…it still won’t go away. The thought won’t leave me alone.”

“And what thought is that, if you feel comfortable resharing it with me?”

Patton kept quiet, only curled into Logan more and tucked his face into Logan’s neck, as though seeking reassurance. Logan held Patton closer to him, waiting and listening.

Then, he heard Patton whisper:

“I’m still scared.”

It was just three single words, all delivered without a trace of emotion or wateriness. But Logan could hear the subtle overtones behind those words, and he understood what they meant.

His face creased slightly before he placed a kiss on Patton's temple and then pressed the sides of their heads together.

“I know. And that’s okay. I am, too. But we’ll figure it out. We’ll figure it out as we go. Together.”

He felt Patton nod into his neck, and they held onto each other, conveying all their love and care for each other in their embrace, letting each other know that they had each other, they were here, and that they would always be here.

Soon, Logan whispered to Patton: “Let’s get some sleep. It’s been a long day.”

He felt Patton nod again, then Patton shifted so that he was laying his head against Logan’s chest comfortably, his eyes closed. Logan shifted himself so that he was lying down properly, and he ran his fingers through Patton’s hair a few times more before kissing his forehead one more time and settling down for the night.

Just when he was beginning to feel himself drift off, Logan felt Patton sit up, and he opened his eyes to Patton’s face filling his vision. Even though Patton’s eyes were slightly teary, his light shone bright with love. Then Patton smiled and leaned forward to kiss Logan. Logan accepted the kiss, lifting a hand to cradle his cheek.

When they were done, Patton pulled back to look at him and whispered:

“I love you.”

Warmth swirled in Logan’s chest. “I love you, too,” he whispered back.

The light in Patton’s eyes intensified and he went back for another long, sweet kiss.

They went back and forth like this a couple times, whispering sweet nothings and everythings while trading kisses in between, before fatigue finally overtook them. And as they fell asleep like this – in each other’s arms, lips still tingling from the kisses and stretched into contented, tender smiles – they both thought that they wouldn’t have this any other way.

*******

And so it was, from that night onward, Logan and Patton worked hard to improve on communicating their needs and wants and listening to each other – as well as their own individual burdens – and thanks to their dedication, they were able to smooth out most disagreements they came across more easily.

But, as stated before, it wasn’t always perfect. There were days when either of them would fall back into bad habits, leaving one or the other feeling as though they’d taken several steps back. Other days, if it was an especially trying day with small frustrations snowballing to a mountain of aggravation, one would act out, leading to the other shutting down emotionally. And yet other days still, due to their shared stubbornness, there would be times when they would come to a complete standstill, unable to budge.

This was especially apparent during the times when Thomas was facing a dilemma where there was no room for compromise, when a side had to be chosen. On the days when reason needed to be heeded, Patton would be sulky and teary but would acquiesce to the decision, and on the other days when the heart’s desire was too strong to be argued against, Logan would be irritated and disappointed but would also defer to the choice. When those times happened, Logan and Patton gave each other space for the day: to cry, to rant to another Side, to mope, to scribble furiously into a notebook, anything to get their negative feelings out of their systems.

But, as established at the very beginning of their relationship, Patton and Logan managed to maintain the one cardinal rule they agreed upon no matter how tense or bad things got: never going to bed angry.

Come around the time before dinner, depending on who was the one most affected by the decision, one sought the other out, and they would talk things out. There were always more tears, maybe a few bitter or low-esteemed comments here and there, but they would remind each other that the decision did not represent a rejection of them (by either each other or Thomas), that they were aware and accepting of their position and thoughts and opinions, and that they were there for each other no matter what. They would then go have dinner with the other Sides, so that the family time was not saturated with leftover bad feelings.

After dinner, at 8pm on the dot, the couple would make sure to do something lighthearted, something that relaxed them and reaffirmed their love and care for one another. Maybe they watched something on the TV: a show, movie or documentary, or read a book together, or watched YouTube videos of their favourite interests, or coloured in colouring books, or listened to music or a podcast. Again, in regards to who was upset that day, the activities they indulged in were for the Side who needed cheering up and reassurance.

Then, when the night was over, they went upstairs to their shared room and fell asleep in each other’s arms, with kisses full of reassurance and forgiveness and cuddles full of promises of a new day and a fresh start, while strengthening their bond and relationship.

Although it wasn’t always easy, Logan and Patton were determined to always keep working at their bond and with each other. And they became stronger for it. For their famILY. For Thomas. And, most of all, for themselves.

#sanders sides #logicality #romantic logicality #patton sanders #logan sanders #ts patton #ts logan #roman sanders #virgil sanders #janus sanders #remus sanders #hurt/comfort #fluff and angst #angst with a happy ending #sanders sides fic #sanders sides fanfiction #light and tenderness au #melanie's writings

13 notes · View notes

melanie-adia-of-the-multiverse · 2 years

Text

Rainbows After The Tempest: Chapter 4

Summary: Even the best of relationships hit a snag once in a while. The important thing to keep in mind is how to untangle the knot and move forward.

Part 3 of Light and Tenderness Verse

Chapter 4 of 5

Pairing: Logicality

Word Count: 2,873

Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Angst/Fluff

Chapter Warnings: Food mentions and one case of sexual innuendo (once again thanks to Remus). Apart from that, this is just pure, sweet fluff. Easily my most favourite chapter of the lot.

AO3 Link

Part 1: AO3 Tumblr

Part 2: AO3 Tumblr

First Previous Next

When Logan and Patton reached the kitchen downstairs, they were greeted with a pleasantly domestic tableau.

Everyone was there, and in the final stages of dinner preparation.

Roman and Remus were setting the dining table. Or, more accurately, Roman was setting the table while trying to stop Remus from doing anything dangerous with the cutlery.

Janus was at the stove, stirring pots and doling out portions on plates and in bowls before handing them to Virgil to bring to the table.

Snarks were still being traded between the two of them, but they were half-hearted at best, and even Roman and Remus’ sparring had a playful (maybe even brotherly) edge to it, if it was possible.

Logan gave a small smile at the peaceful scene, and Patton’s chest warmed.

Everyone looked up at the sound of the remaining two members of their famILY approaching, and they paused in controlled apprehension before noting Logan’s relaxed shoulders and Patton’s flushed but smiling face. Virgil placed the last two filled plates on the table and bent back up, worrying his lips slightly.

“Everything good, Teach?” Roman asked, leaning on the table, eyes flicking between his nerd and father figure.

Logan and Patton looked at each other for a moment. Then they smiled and Patton accepted a chaste kiss on his cheek from Logan before the teacher turned back to Roman.

“Yes, we’re ‘good’.”

The air immediately lightened as everyone else relaxed and beamed at the favourable resolution. And on that happy note, everyone sat down to dinner.

All in all, it was a nice meal. Everyone was on their best behaviour, even Remus though he still couldn’t help himself from making an inappropriate comment now and then. To the Light Sides’ surprise (save for Virgil), Janus proved himself to be quite proficient at cooking, which led Remus to regale them all with stories of all the cooking misadventures he, Janus, and Virgil often got into when it was the three of them on the ‘Other Side’. Virgil chimed in from time to time with a dry comment or a correction, and he and Janus continued their sarcastic banter but managed to keep it to a minimum for both Logan and Patton’s sake.

Patton, although he was doing much better after talking to Logan and gave a few smiles throughout the meal, was still more subdued than usual and mostly kept to himself and his plate. He was perfectly content to just listen for once, though every so often he would make a comment or crack a joke, and he even managed a brief conversation with Janus about getting together to discuss recipes in the future, which Janus begrudgingly agreed to (though everyone could tell that Janus was secretly chuffed). Thankfully, everyone was mindful of Patton’s mood and made an effort to make sure that he didn’t feel pressured to join in if he didn’t want to, and Logan held his hand under the table the whole time.

When dinner was over, Virgil and Janus started clearing the table. Patton made a move to help since he usually was the one to take care of the dishes with help from Logan, but Janus set a look upon him that made him stop, though Janus immediately followed up with a genuine smile to reassure Patton that he hadn’t done anything wrong. Then Virgil caught Logan’s eye and he motioned with his head out of the kitchen.

Logan was confused for a moment, but when he noted Roman and Remus joining in on the clean-up, he understood. This was the others’ way of letting him know that this was his and Patton’s night off. To go and do something just the two of them. He sent them all a grateful smile for their thoughtfulness and effort to help him and his significant other out. He then guided Patton out of the kitchen, who looked a little confused but said nothing.

When they got to the common room, Logan turned around and took both of Patton’s hands in his, looking at him tenderly.

“Is there anything you would like to do, dear?”

Patton blinked. “Like, right now?”

Logan nodded.

Patton nibbled on his lip. “I’m fine with whatever you wanna do.”

Logan shook his head. “No. This is your night, starlight. You’ve been through a lot today, so we should do something that you like doing.”

Patton squirmed. Logan could tell that he was fighting against his ingrained habit of deferring to others, always doing whatever they wanted and not what he wanted. But this was important. Patton had to learn to think more for himself sometimes.

When Patton continued to stay silent, brows furrowed as he fought a mental battle in his head, Logan took pity on him and rubbed comforting circles on the backs of his hands. “Take your time, darling. There’s no rush. And it doesn’t have to be something big, either. Just think of what your heart is telling you.”

Patton looked up at his sweetheart’s face before swallowing and looking down at their joined hands. It wasn’t just that he was still learning to put himself first a bit more, but he was also unsure of what he wanted to do at this very moment. After the intense, emotional heart-to-heart he and Logan had had, he was honestly feeling a little drained and not up to doing anything mentally strenuous. So, he appreciated Logan’s patience and understanding.

Maybe that was it. Something low-key. Something mindless that he wouldn’t really need to focus on too much.

But what if Logan said ‘no’?

No. No thinking like that. Logan had said that they could do anything he wanted, no matter how big or small, the conviction in his tone and eyes evident.

Patton looked back up at Logan. “Maybe…can we, like, maybe just…watch a movie? Or videos on my phone? Or something like that?”

Logan said nothing for a moment, and a spike of dread at the thought of Logan actually saying ‘no’ shot through Patton.

But then Logan smiled warmly at him and kissed his cheek. “As you wish.”

Then an idea came to Logan and he let go of Patton and made his way to the couch. Patton watched him, confused but curious.

Logan proceeded to arrange the couch cushions in a way where one’s back would be supported when laying against them. Then he took off his shoes and sat down on the couch, shifting himself so that he was lounging on it, his back and head supported by the cushions. Then he looked up at Patton with a soft smile and reached his arms out towards him, an open-armed invitation.

Warmth welled in Patton’s chest at this sweet gesture, and he found himself teary again but with a smile. He made his own way to the couch and removed his own shoes before sitting down. After shifting himself slightly, he scooted back so that he was sitting between Logan’s legs and his back was flush against Logan’s chest. Once he was in place, Logan wrapped his arms around Patton, completing the cuddle.

One thing that Patton loved about cuddling Logan – that no one else but him knew about, to his secret pleasure – was that though Logan was well-built like Thomas (they all were since they were all Thomas), he had the slightest layer of softness around his middle, allowing Patton to be comfortably cushioned. Patton let out a soft sigh as he relaxed against Logan.

“Comfortable?” Logan asked, feeling the tension practically leak out of Patton.

Patton nodded, bumping the back of his head against Logan’s chest in the process.

Then he let out a loud, surprised shriek when Logan dug his fingers into Patton’s sides, activating gargalesthesia.

“Logan!”

“What? I didn’t do anything.”

Patton swatted at Logan’s arms playfully, only to shriek louder when Logan applied more pressure in retaliation.

“That’s it, I’m leaving!”

Patton made to extricate himself from Logan’s hold, but he wound up jerking back with a squeak as Logan tightened his hold around Patton and pulled him back against him.

“Departure denied.”

Patton turned his head around to glower at Logan, but Logan only looked back at him, his smirk sharp enough to cut glass. Very quickly the corners of Patton’s mouth started twitching, and soon the two lovebirds were sharing a laugh together.

After they sobered up, Patton’s smile shifted to something softer and more adoring, then he tilted his chin upwards. Logan’s own smile turned more affectionate at this before lowering his head down to meet Patton’s lips halfway. Patton raised a hand to cradle Logan’s cheek, and Logan held Patton closer in response.

“Damn, look at ‘em go at it!”

“It’s not at all rude to stare, Remus.”

“That’s why I’m doin’ it!”

Patton and Logan broke the kiss and whipped their heads around at the sound of the voices. Janus and Remus were standing halfway between the kitchen entryway and the stairs, as though they had been on their way upstairs and stopped to interrupt Logan and Patton’s recreational time. Patton squirmed in Logan’s hold, self-conscious under the scrutiny of the Dark Sides. Logan merely glared at them.

“Can we help you with something?” inquired Logan coolly, a little put out by the interruption.

“Oh, we were just on our way out after tidying up the kitchen,” replied Janus. “Is it a crime for us to pass through?”

Logan pursed his lips but said begrudgingly: “No, I suppose not.”

Remus eyed the couple in a way that made Patton shrink back into Logan. It was all the more effective thanks to the emerald tendrils pulsing and vibrating almost lifelike in the intrusive trait’s muddy irises.

“Who’d’ve thunk that you two could suck face like that?” he cackled. “Wonder if this means you’re good at suckin’ other things!”

Patton promptly turned full crimson. Logan flushed faintly but kept a neutral countenance in front of the others.

“Right, well, if you don’t have anything else better to do than gawk at us, then now would be a good time for you to be on your way.”

Remus smirked and shimmied his shoulders. “What if you’re the entertainment, and we wanna watch?”

“Janus…” Patton looked at Janus imploringly, who merely shrugged. “Sorry, Patton. Not always possible to reason with him. He speaks an entirely different language altogether, sometimes.”

“Yep! I could teach it to you sometime, if you want! And maybe even a lil’ more…”

“No, thank you. Instead, let’s see if you can understand plain English,” said Logan, and he used some very short, sharp, shocking words to indicate that it was time for Janus and Remus to go away.

“Logan!”

Patton frowned at Logan in shocked disapproval. Janus and Remus, on the other hand, merely blinked, stunned by Logan’s choice of words. Almost in awe, even.

“Well then,” said Janus, reaching up to tuck back in the slightest lock of hair that just peeked out from under his hat. “I believe that is our cue to take our leave, Remus.”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right. C’mon, Janny! Let’s go play wi’ the Kraken in the Imagination!”

Remus grabbed Janus’ hand and the ‘Dynamic Dark Duo’ sank out, finally leaving the mind-heart pair alone, though the strangled squawk Janus let out when Remus touched him was unmissed by either of them, nor how the human side of Janus’ face flushed peach. Logan filed away that little tidbit of potential blackmail in the back of his head for later.

Alone once more, Patton side-eyed Logan, a disapproving pout still present on his face. “Was it really necessary for you to use that kinda language?”

Logan shrugged. “They deserved it,” he replied primly. “Besides, it got them to leave, didn’t it?”

Patton’s frown deepened for a moment before it fell away and he muttered begrudgingly: “Okay, yeah, it did…but still.”

Logan huffed a chuckle out his nose and tilted his head to the side so that he could catch Patton’s gaze. Patton looked back at him, his lips still pursed, but Logan could see the corners of his mouth twitching slightly.

Then Logan touched his nose to Patton’s and said, “Boop,” before pulling back with a smirk.

Patton blinked owlishly, caught off guard by the ‘un-Logan-ly’ action. Logan merely looked back at him, smiling all the more.

Then Patton’s mouth twitched more, until finally he gave up and the two sweethearts shared another laugh before pushing the encounter out of their heads, intent on focusing on just themselves.

Patton finally decided that he didn’t have the attention span needed for something as long as a movie, so they ended up just watching YouTube videos on Logan’s phone (Patton realized at some point that he’d left his in his room). There was no order, no sequence, just whatever happened to pop into Patton’s head, he pulled it up. They ranged from cat videos – particularly from one channel that featured a Japanese-American couple and their four rescued cats – to a bald, bearded hipster chef with a penchant for recreating dishes from visual entertainment.

But Logan didn’t mind. He actually rather enjoyed them himself, finding them all heartfelt, entertaining and informative, and understanding why they appealed to Patton so much. He thought that Patton had picked the perfect low-energy activity. Plus, he could tell how relaxed Patton was, if the way he melted against Logan was any indication, a marked improvement from the tense hesitancy from before. Besides, what could have been better than having his love in his arms and back to his happy self, gladfully reconnected after the first trying conflict of their relationship?

Soon, when it was close to midnight, Logan became aware of Patton growing heavy in his arms, and he looked down to see Patton drifting off, no longer focusing on the current video they were playing. He huffed a chuckle through his nose and paused the video before turning off his phone and carefully laying it on the coffee table. Then he lifted a hand and gently patted Patton’s cheek.

“Patton,” he crooned.

“Mm?”

“I think it is time we went upstairs.”

“Mm.”

“Is that a ‘yes’, or a ‘no’?”

“Mm.”

Logan snickered. “You’ll have to use actual words, dearest. I don’t know sleep-talk.”

Patton muttered something unintelligible under his breath and rolled over to curl around Logan like a koala, tucking his face into Logan’s neck. It seemed that he was set on sleeping on the couch tonight.

“Love, you don’t think it would be more comfortable in your bed? Or mine?”

Patton gave a half-shrug and mumbled: “ ‘M comfy wi’ you. Don’ wanna move.”

“As flattered as I am by that, sleeping on the couch will likely result in physical discomfort for either of us in the morning.”

“Don’ care.”

Logan pursed his lips. The prospect of waking up stiff and achy due to spending the night on a less-than-ideal sleeping apparatus was not appealing to him. But he studied Patton’s countenance, and he saw the profound exhaustion lurking beneath Patton’s sleepiness. His face softened. He didn’t have the heart to move Patton, and, truthfully, he was feeling too fatigued himself to move. It had been a long, emotionally-draining day for both of them. At this point, neither of them cared enough to even snap themselves into pajamas.

So, with a bit of gentle coaxing, Logan got Patton to sit up a bit, placating the moral Side’s disgruntled grumbles with a quick peck on the lips. Then, using whatever amount of concentration he had remaining, Logan summoned a pillow and blanket. After arranging the pillow so his head would be elevated properly while sleeping, Logan shifted himself and Patton so that they were lying down properly on the couch before draping the blanket over both of them to keep their body temperatures regulated. Then he carefully took off Patton’s glasses and placed them on the coffee table, before doing the same to his own.

Satisfied with their arrangement, they proceeded to make themselves comfortable. With Logan’s torso pillowing his head, Patton wrapped his arms fully around Logan and snuggled into him, throwing a leg over Logan for good measure, which made Logan chuckle and shake his head. Logan cradled Patton’s back with one arm and used his free hand to run his fingers through Patton’s hair, listening to Patton’s soft breathing.

Feeling the gentle pull of sleep tug at the edges of his consciousness, Patton lifted his head to kiss the underside of Logan’s jaw. “I love you,” he whispered, his tone drowsy yet bright with sincerity.

Logan felt his heart swell in his chest at this and he placed a tender kiss on Patton’s forehead, whispering back: “I love you, too.”

Then Patton sat up a bit more and they shared one final proper kiss, long and deep, before settling down for the night for good.

As sleep finally overtook them, warm and safe in their encircling arm-filled cocoon of love and finally at peace, Patton’s right hand rested on top of where Logan’s heart was, and Logan’s left hand reached up on its own accord to place itself on top of Patton’s, fingers lacing imperceptibly.

And somewhere in the Mindscape, something shifted, rearranged, slotted into place, and settled.

#sanders sides #logicality #romantic logicality #patton sanders #logan sanders #ts patton #ts logan #roman sanders #virgil sanders #janus sanders #remus sanders #fluff #nothing but fluff #sanders sides fic #sanders sides fanfiction #light and tenderness au #melanie's writings #cw food mention

3 notes · View notes

melanie-adia-of-the-multiverse · 2 years

Text

Rainbows After The Tempest: Chapter 3

Summary: Even the best of relationships hit a snag once in a while. The important thing to keep in mind is how to untangle the knot and move forward.

Part 3 of Light and Tenderness Verse

Chapter 3 of 5

Pairing: Logicality

Word Count: 4,046

Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Angst/Fluff

Chapter Warnings: Anxiety, guilt, self-doubt, self-worth issues, self blame, spiraling thoughts, crying (lots of it)

AO3 Link

Part 1: AO3 Tumblr

Part 2: AO3 Tumblr

First Previous Next

When Logan reached the top of the stairs, he paused, his heart thumping something fierce. The calm and courage he’d been feeling before gave way to the apprehension and distress that was still always simmering beneath his skin. He was dreading this impending confrontation, but it needed to be done. He needed to make things right. He hated knowing that Patton was upset…and that he’d been the cause again.

First, the fiasco with Thomas’ last failed relationship.

Then, the misstep when Patton overheard him ‘denouncing’ love to Janus in the kitchen only a few months before.

And now, this.

He really was incorrigible, wasn’t he? If the inevitable happened…it would be a concentrated effort on his part to not be shattered nor blindsided by it.

Logan inhaled through his nose and exhaled through his mouth once before making his way down the hallway.

It would be fine.

They could work this out.

They needed to.

Finally, he reached Patton’s door. Logan stood in front of it, the apprehension ratcheting up. He clenched and unclenched his fists by his sides before he shook them out and readjusted his glasses.

Then he fiddled with his tie.

Then he smoothed out the wrinkles in his shirt.

Then –

Logan bit back an exasperated groan. He was stalling. He knew he was. Just initiate the first step: knocking on the door. Rip it off like a Band-Aid, like Virgil always said.

After taking one more deep breath, he lifted a fist and knocked on Patton’s door. Then he brought it back and waited.

Nothing.

Logan waited a beat, then knocked again.

“Patton?” he called out, figuring that Patton hadn’t answered because he hadn’t been sure who was at the door.

Or maybe because he’s ignoring you, a voice in the back of his head chimed in unhelpfully. Logan pushed away the thought and knocked one more time.

“Darling? Can I come in? Please?” he pleaded, unable to prevent desperation from bleeding into his tone.

Still no answer.

Logan swallowed, the anxiety and distress churning in his gut. Then he took a breath and squared his shoulders, deciding to take a chance. He reached out a hand – his fingers quivering slightly – and tried the doorknob.

To his relief, it was unlocked. At least Patton hadn’t tried to shut him out.

He opened the door a smidge and peered through the doorway. He couldn’t really make out anything due to how dim it was. It seemed that Patton had turned off the lights. He slipped into the room and closed the door behind him quietly to ensure privacy. Once he was sure that it was properly shut, Logan turned around to look for Patton.

But it was rather dark. Even with his eyes narrowed so he could peer better, Logan could only make out shadowy outlines of various objects and furniture. Including what looked like a sizable lump on top of a large structure that Logan vaguely knew to be Patton’s bed. He needed more light in here.

Logan held out a hand in front of him and turned his palm facing upwards. Then he slowly raised it toward the ceiling. As he did, the room brightened, bit by bit, until it was just enough so that the rest of Patton’s room came into view. Satisfied with the level of brilliance, Logan went back to looking for his partner.

His face fell at the sight before him.

Patton was curled up on his bed on top of his bedspread, with his back to the door. And even now with Logan having opened the door, entered the room and turned up the light, the bubbly trait was completely silent.

Trying to keep his growing distress at bay, Logan slowly approached the unmoving, Patton-shaped lump on the bed. Once he was next to the bed, Logan stood uncertainly, hesitating on his next action. One wrong move and then he and Patton wouldn’t be able to move forward.

“Patton,” he whispered, as soft as he could possibly be.

Patton said nothing still, showed no sign of having heard Logan aside from his head shifting a bit on his pillow.

Logan licked his lips and mashed them together into a worried line. Then he carefully sat down on the edge of the bed, keeping a respectful berth between them. He felt like it wasn’t right yet to make any further moves.

The rational figment sat in silence for a little bit, just looking at the curled-up ball that was his sweetheart, wanting very much to take him into his arms and absorb all the hurt and anger out of his body.

He wasn’t good at comforting, not naturally. He could do it, and he had done it before, but it was something he’d had to learn, as is the case with all things one doesn’t know well enough about or how to do. This kind of thing had always been Patton’s forte as the fatherly trait: able to soothe many a fit of temper or lend a shoulder to cry on since the day he came to be. It was thanks to Patton – especially once they entered a relationship – that Logan had gotten better at picking up on when one of the others was upset and offering them support in whichever way worked best for them. It was fine for small things like when Virgil was feeling more on edge than usual or Roman was suffering through a loss of inspiration, but for instances that were particularly emotionally-charged, that was when Patton stepped up to the plate, and efficiently so.

But now the roles had reversed, and Logan was the one who needed to step up.

It was clear, however, that Patton wasn’t going to make the first move. He was still licking his emotional wounds, figuratively speaking. Logan needed to be the one to take the initiative.

So, Logan took in a breath, making sure to take a moment to choose his words carefully. Then he opened his mouth and –

“I’m sorry.”

Wait, what?

Logan froze, the words he’d been wanting to say crashing in his throat. Patton was apologizing? But why? Logan was the one at fault here. He shut his mouth again and looked down at the Patton-lump, blinking owlishly.

“P-Pardon?”

Patton shifted slightly, back still to Logan, and when he spoke again his words wavered.

“I’m sorry you have to put up with me.”

If they were in a cartoon, Logan’s eyes would have become – as was the expression – ‘saucer-like’.

“I – what?”

The Patton-lump curled into a tighter ball at this, and the coil in Logan’s chest tightened again. Daring to press his luck further, he shifted closer to his beloved, though still leaving some space between them. Slowly and steadily shrinking Patton’s alarm circle, bit by bit.

“Patton…what do you mean?”

Patton kept quiet but Logan waited patiently this time, giving Patton the space he needed to say what was on his mind, just like how he did for him.

When Patton spoke once more, his voice was small and watery, which further twisted the coil in Logan’s chest unpleasantly.

“I…just…I feel like…maybe you and I are not a good match, after all.”

The coil tightened at full force to the point where Logan couldn’t breathe. His throat closed up, leaving him unable to speak.

Patton continued, managing to sound more broken than before, getting increasingly choked as he went on. “What you said to me earlier…you weren’t wrong. I…feel like I keep making the same mistakes like before. I’m pushy, I want to fix everything, and – I – still don’t listen when I should. I just make things worse. I didn’t pay attention to how upset you were when Thomas was out with Nico and took Roman’s side when you both got into that mini argument. I kept trying to get you to tell me what was wrong when you started shutting yourself up in your room when I probably should’ve just kept quiet and continued giving you space. And I tried to intervene when Thomas tried to talk to you during the meeting when I should’ve stayed out of it. No matter what I do, I just can’t stop meddling. I can’t step back. I can’t leave people well enough alone. And I – can’t – stop – messing – up –”

“No. No. No, no, no.”

Logan couldn’t let this go on. This wasn’t true. Not by a long shot. Patton was foisting all the blame on himself when Logan was the one in the wrong.

“Patton…I…I didn’t mean a word of what I said.”

He watched Patton stiffen, and he could tell that Patton didn’t believe him. God, how had he managed to mess things up this much?

“If anyone’s at fault, it’s me. If anyone should be sorry, it’s me. I was upset that Thomas kept ignoring me and not doing his chores because he was distracted by Nico, and instead of talking about it, I withdrew. I pushed everyone out. I pushed you out. When…when you’re my everything. When you were only trying to be supportive. I took out my frustration on you and it was completely unfair of me to do so. Love, I’m sorry. I should have – I didn’t –”

Logan broke off then, feeling his distress starting to rise to a high point, his eyes beginning to prick. He had been so preoccupied with his continued failed efforts to get Thomas to listen to him and actually get some work done he’d overlooked the fact that everyone else was being affected by his bad mood. Especially Patton. His sweetheart. His significant other. His other half. He was the one who kept messing up. He was the one who kept falling back into his old bad habits. He –

“You…you weren’t mad at me?”

That question shook Logan out of his thoughts, and he looked back down at Patton.

“I – I beg your pardon?”

“All this time…you were angry at Thomas? It wasn’t me?”

“No. No, no. Not at all, love. You didn’t do anything wrong.”

Silence followed Logan’s sentence, and the two of them sat with the recent admissions heavy in the air.

Then Logan noticed Patton’s back starting to quiver, as though Patton was shivering from cold. But somehow he had a feeling that that was not the case.

After hesitating for a moment, Logan cautiously laid a hand on Patton’s back.

The trembling became more violent, and a tiny whimper escaped Patton’s throat.

Logan’s heart sank. He was now certain that Patton was trying to fight back tears.

“Love,” he said hoarsely. “Can you look at me? Please?”

Patton kept trembling, and Logan held his breath in anticipation.

Then Patton rolled over slowly so that he was lying on his other side, and he finally looked up at Logan. His cheeks were splotchy with traces of past tear tracks, his eyes rimmed red, expression tragic. But most and worst of all, the light in his eyes was almost snuffed out, much like the time when Patton thought Logan didn’t love him. It cracked Logan’s heart further to see him like this. He gave his dearheart a soft smile and whispered a simple:

“Hi.”

Patton managed a wobbly smile for a fraction of a second.

Then his face crumpled and he dissolved into tears again.

Logan’s face fell at this and he swiftly lay down next to Patton. He reached his arms out to his other half, and Patton dove into them without any hesitation, laying his head against Logan’s chest and wailing in earnest. Logan enclosed his arms around Patton and held him close.

Alarm shot through Logan when he realized that Patton was, in fact, freezing. None of the warmth that the moral Side was so well-known for present, likely due to all the distress he’d been feeling. Logan embraced his love closer to him, hoping that his own body heat would be enough to warm Patton up.

For a while, Logan just let Patton cry it out, alternating between running his fingers through his hair, rubbing his back and rocking him back and forth, anything to help him get back to a more composed state.

Eventually, Patton’s crying died down into sniffles, punctuated with a hiccup here and there.

“I’m sorry for being so difficult,” he mumbled.

Logan shook his head – even though Patton didn’t see since his face was still buried in Logan’s chest – and brushed Patton’s hair back from his forehead to place a kiss on it. “You’re not being difficult. You haven’t been difficult at all. I was the one who didn’t open up about what was bothering me, and it led to this.”

“Yeah – but – you weren’t ready, and I kept trying to coax you to talk to me.”

“It still doesn’t excuse the way I went about it. And it ended up hurting you.”

Patton sniffled, and Logan summoned a tissue box and held it out to Patton who plucked a few and dabbed at his eyes before covering his mouth with them, as though to try to silence his lingering sobs.

“I still feel like I did something wrong, –” he continued, his whole self convulsing violently with each tremor that shook through him, “– that all I do is wrong. The wedding. When Remus showed himself to Thomas. Thomas himself. This. I go about everything the wrong way, and everyone suffers for it because of me.”

“Falsehood.”

Patton looked up at Logan, surprised, and Logan’s heart simultaneously softened and clenched at Patton’s distraught expression. He pressed his forehead against Patton’s, and he cheered silently when Patton leaned into the touch.

“Yes, you have made mistakes before, –” Patton let out a distressed whine at this and Logan immediately pressed a kiss to his temple to placate him, “– but you’ve learned to recognize them and learn from them. You make strides to better your behaviour and break your bad habits. Which is better than I could ever do.”

Patton swallowed and stared at the fabric of Logan’s shirt, as though trying to zero in on the individual threads. “You still shouldn’t have to put up with me, though.”

Logan clicked his tongue disapprovingly and raised a hand to lift Patton’s chin so they were making eye contact. He needed to make sure Patton was listening.

“Love doesn’t mean ‘putting up with’ someone. Love means loving someone for who they are.” He caressed Patton’s damp cheek, eyes soft and sincere. “And I love everything that makes you you.”

Patton blinked at him, and Logan saw the light start to flicker back. That was good. He was making progress.

But then the light dimmed back down again and Patton looked away, downcast.

“But…how long will it last? How long can we keep this up before it gets too much? Before you get tired of me? Before it…just ends?” Patton’s voice got quieter as he kept talking, ending in a whisper by the end, and a shadow flitted across Patton’s face as he avoided eye contact.

Logan’s brow furrowed at this and he bent his head down to try to catch Patton’s eye despite Patton’s efforts otherwise.

“Love, where is this coming from?”

Patton’s bottom lip wobbled, and he kept quiet for a long moment before finally whispering:

“Him.”

Logan was confused for a moment, but when Patton lifted a hand to grasp at his cat hoodie, he immediately understood.

“You mean, Thomas’ ex?”

Patton’s face crumpled slightly but he nodded, albeit reluctantly.

So, that was it. Patton still had lingering grievances from Thomas’ past failed relationship. And he was worried that the same was going to happen between him and Logan.

Then something else clicked for Logan, and his eyes widened.

“Are you…uncertain about Nico, too?”

Patton’s face crumpled further and he squeezed his eyes shut, a couple of tears slipping out beneath his eyelids.

Ah. It was a double-whammy.

Logan brought Patton back closer to him and started rubbing his back again.

“I can’t speak for Thomas in regards to Nico, since nothing has happened yet. But I know that you and I will be fine.”

“How?” exclaimed Patton, leaning back and looking up with full eyes, his used tissues almost crushed into oblivion in his fist. “How can you be sure?”

Logan opened his mouth to reply, then stopped and closed it, then opened and closed it a second time before finally swallowing and saying:

“I can’t.”

Patton blinked in utter bewilderment, his heart unable to decide whether to tear itself in two or stay in place. Logan mashed his lips together and touched Patton’s cheek again, taking care to choose his words wisely.

“There are a lot of things I’m uncertain about, that I will be uncertain about no matter how prepared I can be about them or wish that I knew the answer to. I can’t be certain about the success of Thomas’ love life. I can’t be certain how long he’ll live. I absolutely will not be certain when he’ll do the damn dishes.”

Logan then removed his hand from Patton’s face and placed it on Patton’s chest, right over where Patton’s heart was.

“But there’s one thing that I am certain about, that I will stay certain about for the rest of my existence…and that is that I love you.”

Patton gaped at Logan, speechless. Logan continued, determined to keep helping Patton understand while he had his attention.

“I want to promise that I will never hurt you again, but I recognize that that is an unrealistic standard to uphold, because, like you once said before, there will always be times when we’ll hurt each other, both unintentionally and out of anger. I reacted out of anger, and so I will take this as a teachable moment to think through on my actions and words and to reach out when I need help in future. Because that is a flaw of mine, and one I’ve neglected too long to work on. You were never to blame for any of what happened, and I’m sorry I dragged you into it. I also understand your uncertainty and fear about us, and I will work on proving otherwise. I’m not going anywhere. We can’t, anyway, considering we live inside Thomas’ head.”

Patton let out a watery chuckle, and Logan was puzzled by this lighthearted reaction until he replayed his words back in his head and realized that he’d somehow made a joke.

Well, at least it got Patton to laugh a little.

“You feel that you are wrong for me, that we are wrong together. And maybe in the past I would have agreed. But we work together better than expected, and I think we complement each other more than we give ourselves credit for. You helped me to see that there was more to my existence than just being ‘Logic’…well, the same can be said for you. You are more than just ‘Morality.’ You’re Patton. My Patton. My Patton who loves with everything he has to offer. My Patton who is able to feel so deeply and acutely, even when it is painful. My Patton who recognizes when he’s made a mistake and makes efforts to learn from it and move on. My Patton who isn’t afraid to be vulnerable, something I could learn from. All you can see are your shortcomings and flaws, and that it makes you unlovable. But I don’t love you in spite of them. I love you because of them.”

Logan paused then to give himself a breather, then he leaned forward and kissed Patton’s right cheek before leaning back again and giving his love a tender smile.

“I believe in us, and I hope you will, too.”

Patton’s eyes widened, and Logan held his breath, hoping he’d said the right things and that Patton finally understood.

Then Patton’s face crumpled again and fresh tears cascaded down his cheeks. He let out a sob before burrowing himself into Logan again, tucking his face into the crook of Logan’s neck.

Logan held Patton close to him, cradling the back of his head and his back tenderly. He pressed kisses into Patton’s hair as Patton rode through the new wave of tears, overcome by Logan’s words and finally believing the truth behind them.

Then Patton lifted his face out of Logan’s neck and tilted it up to press a kiss to Logan’s left cheek.

“I love you,” he whispered hoarsely.

Logan’s heart leapt at this and he shifted his head so that he was cheek-to-cheek with Patton, not caring about the tear stains.

“I love you, too,” he whispered back.

He felt Patton shake his head and he leaned back in time to see Patton lift both of his hands up to cradle Logan’s face, keeping steady, determined eye contact as though it was his mission to do so. Matching sclera to sclera, iris to iris, pupil to pupil all the way.

And there it was: Patton’s light. Slowly coming back to its former brilliance. How Logan had missed seeing it, and he was determined to make sure it never dimmed that low again.

“I – love – you,” Patton repeated again, firmly and almost desperately. And when Logan looked properly, he saw the underlying uncertainty behind Patton’s conviction, the desire for reassurance and reciprocation.

His face softened and Logan reached up to cup Patton’s face in his hand with a coo, leaning forward to kiss each cheek.

“I love you,” he repeated, enunciating each word clearly and with equal conviction. “So much.”

Relief flooded through Patton’s senses as Logan’s words washed over him, assuring him of Logan’s truth and reciprocation, and he surged forward to lock lips with Logan, sharing love and forgiveness and care, and Logan unequivocally returned the sentiments.

And just like the night they shared their first kiss, the feelings and sensations they’d felt then enveloped them, yet somehow more all-encompassing than before. The warmth in Patton’s chest returned with an intensity so fierce to the point where Logan could feel it through his own. The physical boundaries of their bodies seemed to disappear and it was like they became one: two people sharing a soul. Yin and yang finally in balance. The brain complementing the heart. Logos in tandem with pathos. Everything around them fell away until there was only them. And that was all they needed.

They stayed like that for a while, closer in body, mind, heart and soul than they ever had been before in their metaphysical lives. Then, when they finally broke apart, Patton broke down in tears once more – overcome by so much and everything – and Logan held him through it all, the anchor to Patton’s wayward ship.

When the last of Patton’s tears dried out, Logan sat Patton up properly, keeping an arm curled around his back. He passed the tissue box to Patton again so he could use some fresh ones to mop up his face before summoning a glass of water to help Patton hydrate.

Logan rubbed Patton’s back a bit more as the emotional Side drank the water, and when he was done, Logan took the empty glass from Patton and willed it away before chancing a glance at his watch. His eyes widened a bit. It was right around dinner time. He looked down at Patton, who was still leaning against Logan with his eyes closed.

“Think you feel up to dinner, love?”

Patton gave a quiet hum of affirmation. Then Logan’s question registered in his head and his eyes shot open and he sat up.

“Oh! We were supposed to – if we hadn’t – I hadn’t –”

Logan shushed him and brought him in close again, kissing his temple. “There will be other times. We have the rest of Thomas’ lifetime for many more.”

Patton took in a shaky breath, managing to compose himself. “I hope so…”

Logan leaned his forehead against Patton’s. “I know so.”

Patton gave a small laugh at that, and Logan smiled before pecking Patton on the forehead and slowly standing up from the bed, helping Patton up in the process. Then they left Patton’s room and made their way downstairs, arms wrapped around each other’s waist and not an inch of space between them.

#sanders sides #logicality #romantic logicality #patton sanders #logan sanders #hurt/comfort #fluff and angst #sanders sides fic #sanders sides fanfiction #light and tenderness au #melanie's writings #cw anxiety #cw guilt #cw self doubt #cw crying #ts patton #ts logan

7 notes · View notes

melanie-adia-of-the-multiverse · 2 years

Note

omg another one !! im so excited !!

Another chapter will be coming out very soon! :)

#ask reply

1 note · View note

melanie-adia-of-the-multiverse · 2 years

Note

ur my favorite writer on tumblr and im so excited i havent read the two newest installments but i have a three hour car ride next weekend for that :DD

I'm appreciative of your kind words. :) Hope they bring you enjoyment when the time comes!

#ask reply

1 note · View note

melanie-adia-of-the-multiverse · 2 years

Text

Rainbows After The Tempest: Chapter 2

Summary: Even the best of relationships hit a snag once in a while. The important thing to keep in mind is how to untangle the knot and move forward.

Part 3 of Light and Tenderness Verse

Chapter 2 of 5

Pairing: Logicality

Word Count: 3,746

Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Angst/Fluff

Chapter Warnings: Guilt, self-doubt, swearing, tension, puke mention, food mentions, mentions of non-food items being consumed, poison mention (nobody gets poisoned), sex humour/mentions (by guess who), Remus being Remus (as always)

AO3 Link

Part 1: AO3 Tumblr

Part 2: AO3 Tumblr

Previous Next

The other Sides sat in stunned silence, unsure of what to make of what just happened. While they were relieved that another blow-up had been aborted, it was still disheartening for them to see that both of the Sides who’d been involved in the disagreement were still greatly upset. Virgil and Roman exchanged conflicted expressions with each other before they turned their focus towards their resident teacher.

Logan was still standing where he was, looking up towards the stairs with a troubled face, internally torn between chasing after his broken heart and giving him space.

Virgil and Roman looked at each other again, their faces shifting towards sympathy, before Roman looked back toward Logan.

“Teach?”

That seemed to snap Logan out of his melancholic stupor, as though he’d forgotten about everyone else, and they watched him give himself a mental shake and adjust his glasses before turning towards them with a neutral mask in place, arms tightly crossed again.

They knew what he was doing. He was falling back into his habit of ‘turning it off’, acting as though what had happened wasn’t affecting him, putting on an aloof front as a defense mechanism against strife. As if they hadn’t just watched the canyon widening between him and Patton.

They didn’t want that. Logan had come too far from where he used to be before by going back to seeming impervious. After falling in love with Patton, Logan had come out of his shell more, being more approachable and more willing to share physical affection with the rest of the famILY. He’d started allowing himself to just be, be him: Logan. He’d let go of a bit of the need to embody the stern, stoic ‘Logic’ persona at all times, and they never wanted him to feel like he needed to go back to that.

Roman gave Logan a gentle smile and patted the space on the couch between him and Virgil, moving aside a bit to make more room.

Virgil – still scrunched up in a ball – didn’t smile, but his gaze was sympathetic when he locked eyes with Logan and he motioned to the open spot with his head.

Though minute and silent, their gestures communicated one thing.

It’s okay, Lo. You can let go. No need to pretend.

And Logan understood.

Just like that, the veil was pulled back and the dejected look from before came back over Logan’s face, his shoulders slumping and the iron grip he’d been maintaining slackening, leaving nail marks on his exposed forearms. He bowed his head somewhat and made his way to the couch, his feet dragging slightly against the carpet. Once there, he sat down between Roman and Virgil and bent over with a heavy sigh, resting his elbows on his knees and covering his face with his hands, pushing his glasses up in the process.

Roman’s face fell at this, and he tentatively wrapped an arm around Logan’s shoulders, prepared to move it if Logan was uncomfortable. To his pleasant surprise, Logan didn’t shy away; in fact, he leaned into Roman, as though trying to derive strength from Roman’s touch. Emboldened by this positive reaction, Roman started rubbing Logan’s shoulder in a manner he hoped was comforting.

Virgil stayed balled up, unmoving from his spot, but he turned his body a bit so that he was facing Logan, as though he was trying to shield the rational figment from the world. He finally released his self-hold on his arms, wincing at the twinges from keeping them in the same position for so long, and he crossed his arms over his knees and rested his chin on top of them, letting out a sigh through his nose.

The three Light Sides stayed in that subdued yet close state for a moment, just trying to pull back from the emotion of the prior scene and be present in the calm and quiet.

“It’ll be okay, Lo,” Virgil murmured eventually. “Just give him some time.”

“I didn’t mean to…” Logan trailed off, unable to finish his sentence. But it was fine; he didn’t need to.

Roman squeezed Logan’s shoulder. “We know, Specs.”

“I just –” Logan lifted his head out of his hands, and Roman and Virgil’s hearts clenched at the sight of Logan’s face looking even more distraught than before. They waited for him to carry on talking, but it seemed that he was at a loss for words. His eyes dropped to his lap, slightly unfocused.

Roman resumed rubbing circles into Logan’s shoulder and wracked his brains for something reassuring he could say. But he wasn’t entirely sure if he could. The situation seemed rather bleak. Didn’t mean he wasn’t going to make a concentrated effort, though.

“He’s right, Teach. Patton just needs a little space for a bit. I’m sure once you’ve both calmed down a bit then you can talk it out together and smooth things out.”

Logan didn’t react to Roman’s words. He just stared blankly down at his half-clenched hands in his lap.

Roman furrowed his brow at this and looked to Virgil. The emo trait only looked back at him, probably feeling just as helpless as he was.

Virgil spoke up this time, though it was with a fair level of trepidation, considering the subject matter he was daring to bring up.

“Did you manage to…talk things out with Thomas?”

Roman felt Logan stiffen beneath his hold and he winced in wary anticipation. Virgil shrank into himself upon seeing Logan’s reaction, waiting for another outburst.

But instead, Logan’s shoulders slumped again and he replied in a weary voice: “We did. I…managed to make him aware of the reason why I…lost my temper as I did. I apologized to him for that and promised to actually speak up about any issues that are truly bothering me with him in future, and he apologized to me and promised that he would take my suggestions more into consideration and not disregard me.”

“Okay. Okay, that’s…that’s great. Good to hear.”

Virgil breathed in and out his nose, relieved to have avoided another blow-up. At least that was one interpersonal conflict that had been taken care of. Not the main one, but still.

Silence fell over the trio again. Roman and Virgil both furrowed their brows in thought, wondering what else either of them could say or do.

Then a timid voice piped up.

“What if…we can’t talk it out?”

Roman and Virgil looked back down at Logan, and they were dismayed to see how small and sad Logan’s frame was.

“You mean, with Pat?” asked Virgil, his gut twisting at the ominous declaration.

Logan’s brow furrowed, but he gave a jerky nod.

“What do you mean, Logan?” said Roman, leaning back but still keeping a hand on Logan’s upper back. “I mean, like, you can. You have, before.”

But Logan shook his head at this, squeezing his eyes shut, pressing his lips into a thin line. “I…said such unkind things to him…I don’t think – he could –”

“Logan.”

Logan broke off and looked up at Virgil, whose eyes were sharp beneath his bangs. They immediately softened as he took in Logan’s stricken expression, and Virgil took a cleansing breath as he gathered his thoughts.

“Okay, yeah, you did say some…harsh stuff, but I can kinda tell that it’s coming from a painful place.”

Logan flinched and Virgil winced. He felt bad for making Logan feel bad, even though it wasn’t really his intention. He was telling it like it was.

“I mean, like, I don’t really know the full story of what’s been going on, –” he continued, “– what’s been upsetting you and why you’ve been pulling away, and ya don’t hafta tell us anything if you don't want to, but – like – just – we’re worried about you. We’ve been worried about you. And it’s been hard for us to see you be like this when we didn’t know what to do or how to help, even if you maybe didn’t really want any help. And I know Patton’s been worried about you, too.”

Logan’s face fell and he hung his head in shame and guilt, and Roman immediately laid his other hand on Logan’s knee, trying to convey some level of comfort. Virgil looked at the creative Side gratefully before he kept talking.

“So, like, yeah, he’s hurt and upset right now, and I still think he needs a lil’ time alone before you try to talk things out with him…but, I know Pat, or, at least, I’ve gotten to know him enough to guess that he probably feels bad too, and that he’s more upset at the situation than at you.”

Logan looked up at Virgil again, surprise sketched into his features. Virgil bit his bottom lip and gave a quick shrug.

“I dunno. I could be wrong. I hope not. But, like, Patton cares a lot. And he loves a lot. He loves you a lot. And not just because he’s Thomas’ heart. He loves period. He’s the happiest he’s ever been since getting together with you, and yeah, what happened sucked, and you’re both probably gonna have to really talk it out, but…I don’t think this is the end for either of you. ‘Cause neither of you want it to be.”

The common area was silent as everyone stared at Virgil, in awe of the insightful speech he just made. Logan was particularly taken aback, but also touched; his mouth was parted slightly, the too-tight coil in his chest loosening up a bit thanks to Virgil’s kind words. Virgil’s cheeks turned pink beneath his white foundation and he ducked his head slightly at the attention.

“Ugh, I can’t stand how nauseatingly sweet this is.”

“I know, right? It almost makes you wanna puke your –”

“No, Remus. Not today.”

“Aww! Party pooper!”

“That, too.”

The three Core Sides turned their heads to glare at Janus and Remus. They’d almost forgotten that they weren’t the only ones in the common area. Janus merely looked back at them with a placid air, his face expertly neutral considering he had a lapful of Remus lounging on top of him as he sat in Logan’s armchair. Remus had a smirk on and his eyebrows raised in a way that said, ‘What? I didn’t say anything’.

“Anyways, –” Roman spoke up, returning his focus back to Logan, “– Virgil’s right, Specs. Our puffball probably wants to fix things just as much as you do, so just let him get it outta his system and then, when the time is right, go up there and win his heart back!”

Virgil and Logan rolled their eyes mildly at Roman’s segue into his usual dramaticism at the end, but his conviction and optimism did help to lighten the mood a bit.

“But –” And here Roman emphasized the word by squeezing Logan’s knee, his tone turning serious, “– and I know this is gonna be hard for you to hear, but when you go up there, talk to him. Be open about what’s been bothering you. Just like you did with Thomas. ‘Cause I think I can speak for all of us that we don’t want a repeat of what happened today.”

Logan’s face creased and he closed his eyes again and bowed his head, swallowing hard. Virgil side-eyed Roman over Logan’s head with a raised eyebrow.

Geez. You don’t think that was a little much, Princey?

Roman met Virgil’s gaze evenly and scrunched up his mouth to one side.

You know I’m right.

Then they heard Logan forcefully blow out some air and they looked back in time to see Logan sitting upright again, his face drawn but resolute.

“You’re right,” he murmured, his hands clenching into fists.

Roman patted Logan’s back, and when Logan looked at him, he followed up with a reassuring smile. Then Logan turned his head towards Virgil, who gave him a thumbs-up. The coil in his chest loosened up more, and the knowledge that he had the support of his friends-slash-family members was enough to make the corners of Logan’s mouth peak upwards, even briefly.

“Eh, I think all you two lovedorks really need is a good, hard fucking!”

“REMUS!”

“What? They both need to blow off steam, and make-up sex is a good way of gettin’ rid of the pissy feelings!”

“NO! Uh, uh! Absolutely not!” Virgil snapped, sweeping his open palms outward and nearly smacking Logan in the face.

Remus shrugged and leapt off of Janus (who grunted from the sudden movement) onto his feet. “All right, well, this is gettin’ boring! I’m gonna go bash some things in! Toodles!” And with some crude miming as a farewell, Remus was gone.

After taking a moment to recover from Remus’ abrupt departure, Janus got up from Logan’s armchair and rolled his shoulders slightly before straightening out his clothes. “I suppose I should get going, too. I’ve important things to do.”

“Like what? Your twelve-step skin care routine?” Virgil scoffed.

Janus lifted his chin up. “Oh, I’m sorry. I wasn’t aware that not everyone takes care of their personal appearance. Though, I guess, you don’t count. Right, Virgil?”

Virgil’s face flushed, and Roman clenched his jaw but was stopped from jumping on the defense wagon by Logan sighing: “Could you both please not?”

The emo and snake sent half-guilty glances at Logan before exchanging whole glares with each other, but stopped their gibing for Logan’s sake. Enough confrontation had happened that day, nobody else had the energy for any more.

Janus got ready to sink out, but then stopped as though a thought had come to him and he addressed Logan, who looked up at the deceitful Side questioningly. Janus adjusted the clasp of his capelet before speaking.

“If you wish, I can take over dinner duty tonight so you can go talk to Patton.”

Logan remembered with a jolt that he and Patton were supposed to cook tonight, but because of their argument…his face creased slightly at the reminder but then smoothed out quickly after. He was about to give an answer when Roman interrupted.

“Wait, you can cook?”

Janus scoffed, looking almost genuinely offended. “Who else was supposed to make sure Remus and Virgil didn’t starve?”

Virgil let out a scoff of his own. “Um, excuse you, I could take care of myself, thank you very much!”

“I don’t know if stuffing your face with cereal right out of the cereal box while sitting on top of the fridge counts as ‘taking care of yourself’.”

“Better than Remus chewing on glass or literal bones!”

“Stop.”

Janus and Virgil flinched at Logan’s tone. They’d gone and gotten him all worked up again. Damn it.

Logan took a deep breath and replied: “I appreciate the offer, Janus. Thank you.”

Janus inclined his head at Logan, his face unreadable as always. Then, with a final smirk sent towards Virgil and Roman, who glowered back at him, he left for his room.

Roman rolled his eyes and got to his feet. “I think I’ll get going, too. Maybe get some writing or sketching done.”

Virgil and Logan nodded mutely, and Roman turned to leave, but then he stopped and turned back towards Logan. “You gonna be okay, Teach?” he asked softly.

Logan looked up at Roman before giving a half-shrug and mumbling: “Maybe. Eventually. Hopefully…”

Roman’s face softened at this, and then he bent over and wrapped his arms around Logan’s shoulders to give him a hug.

Logan froze, stunned by Roman’s action, but he didn’t push him away. Roman tightened his hold on his scholarly counterpart.

“It’ll be okay, Logan,” he whispered, keeping his tone low enough so that only Logan heard.

Logan’s breath hitched and he wrapped his own arms around Roman, returning the hug.

“I hope so…” he whispered back throatily.

Roman gave Logan a squeeze. “I know so.”

That got a small chuckle out of Logan. Roman looked over Logan’s shoulder at Virgil and gave him a significant look. Virgil replied back at him with a firm nod. Satisfied, Roman gave Logan one final squeeze and pulled back, flashing him another reassuring smile before finally sinking out.

After Roman’s departure, Logan and Virgil sat in pensive silence for a bit, neither moving nor saying anything to each other. Just two introverts existing together.

Then – in a move that was almost second nature – Virgil took out his phone and pulled up the ‘Podcasts’ app. He flipped through the roster of various episodes from all kinds of podcasts until he came across one on obscure cryptids ‘found’ around the world. Then he nudged Logan with an elbow. Logan started a bit and turned to look at Virgil. The anxious trait gave his rational counterpart a lopsided half-smile before holding up an earphone and his phone screen showing the podcast he’d pulled up. Logan’s eyes flicked to the offering and back to Virgil’s face before the corners of his mouth quirked up in turn. He took the proffered earphone and slipped it in one of his ears, Virgil doing the same with the other earphone. Once they were set, Virgil pressed ‘START’ to begin the podcast and the two of them relaxed against the couch cushions, letting the words of the orator wash over them and relishing in the stillness that had finally settled.

As the next hour or so passed by, Virgil kept an eye on Logan, and he was able to tell that Logan was relaxing somewhat but his mind was still elsewhere. He shuffled closer to Logan and leaned in so that they were touching shoulders, nothing more, nothing less. Logan felt the movement and understood what Virgil was trying to do. He leaned back, appreciative of Virgil’s efforts to provide support no matter how small it was.

Because it was true; while he truly was enjoying listening to the podcast – a favourite pastime of his and Virgil’s when they hung out together, as well as a tried-and-true method of relaxation for himself – Logan’s thoughts still couldn’t stop jumping to Patton every so often, and he itched to reconcile with his beloved. But he knew the others were right. Both he and Patton needed to step back from their prior heightened emotional states before they could reattempt rational discourse.

Soon, in what felt like no time at all, the podcast came to an end, and Virgil turned to Logan.

“Did that help at all? he asked.

Logan gave back the earphone and smiled at Virgil. “It did. Thank you kindly, Virgil.”

Virgil gave another half-smile back, which promptly turned into a grimace when he noticed something – or someone – behind Logan. “You’re back, already?”

Logan turned around to see that Janus had returned, his scales looking shinier than they did before.

Janus rolled his eyes. “You sound so thrilled, Virgil. No need to overdo it,” he drawled.

Virgil pursed his lips but didn’t reply. Janus then turned to Logan.

“I believe it’s time.”

Logan glanced at his watch, and swallowed before looking back up and nodding at Janus. It was now or never.

Janus’ mismatched eyes �� his left one a pure yellow snake slit, his right one a seemingly ordinary honey brown at first glance but gave way to a deep amber with facets of citrine, heliodor and chrysoberyl when viewed from different angles or in light – held Logan’s gaze for a beat longer, making Logan feel a little uneasy but somehow unable to look away.

Then, they seemed to soften, and a ghost of a smile hovered over Janus’ lips. But this one seemed different from the others he usually gave. This one seemed more…sympathetic, and encouraging, which caught Logan a little off guard if he was honest. Then Janus motioned with his head towards the ceiling, and the smile turned more solid, more genuine, subtle yet clear in its message.

Go on. Go to him. He needs you.

Logan wasn’t sure what to make of what he’d just witnessed, if he’d imagined it, but he sent a tentative smile at the figment of self-preservation nonetheless.

Then, as though it never happened, Janus’ own mask slid back into place and he turned to head into the kitchen.

Virgil jumped up from the couch, and Janus turned around at the motion. He arched an eyebrow.

“I’m assuming you’re coming along to shadow me?”

Virgil shrugged. “Gotta make sure you don’t fuck anything up, or whatever.”

“Well, shoot. So much for my diabolical plan of poisoning the soup tonight.”

Janus then continued his way into the kitchen. Virgil made to follow him before stopping and turning towards Logan.

“Hey, L?”

Logan – still sitting on the couch – turned to Virgil with a questioning hum.

“You got this.”

Logan’s eyes widened a fraction and he swallowed down on the sudden lump in his throat, feeling an uncomfortable mixture of hesitancy about the daunting task ahead of him as well as gratitude towards his fellow left-brained Side. Toward all of them, really, for their emotional support and encouragement, however they showed it.

“Th-Thank you…Virgil,” he finally managed to say.

Virgil gave a slight nod, coupled with an equally slight smile. Then – with a parting two-fingered salute – he disappeared into the kitchen after Janus.

Logan heard their snarking start up again, and it was his turn to roll his eyes. But truthfully, he wasn’t too worked up. He knew that this was just how Janus and Virgil were with each other. At least it was more like little barbs now than the all-out bombardments from before. After ‘the talk’, everyone promised to do and be better for Thomas, including Janus and Virgil, though it was tricky as they still often gave into the temptation to nip at each other’s heels. But Logan could tell that they were trying to make an effort. He wondered (and maybe even hoped a little) if the two of them truly did want to mend what they used to have before but were unsure of how to go about it.

Oh, well. No use ruminating about that particular issue. He had something more important to do.

Logan stood up from the couch and carefully stretched out all of his stiff joints from sitting down for so long. He rolled his shoulders and pushed them back, taking a moment to breathe deeply and steel himself against whatever was to come. Then – with a final nod of resolve – he headed up the stairs towards his mission.

Objective: Reconcile ties with Patton.

4 notes · View notes

melanie-adia-of-the-multiverse · 2 years

Text

Rainbows After The Tempest: Chapter 1

Summary: Even the best of relationships hit a snag once in a while. The important thing to keep in mind is how to untangle the knot and move forward.

Part 3 of Light and Tenderness Verse

Chapter 1 of 5

Pairing: Logicality

Word Count: 4,355

Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Angst/Fluff

Chapter Warnings: Anxiety, anger, shouting, implied/referenced arguing, spiraling thoughts, precarious handling of a sharp weapon (courtesy of Remus), hurt feelings, distress

AO3 Link

Part 1: AO3 Tumblr

Part 2: AO3 Tumblr

Author’s Note: Salutations. I hope you all have been well. To avoid the pitfalls I fell into with my last story, I endeavoured to be more organized which I was able to do by drafting up a general outline to follow, mapping out some visual guides and setting up writing deadlines to keep me on track. As I was planning out the story, my instinct told me to make it a multi-chapter fic. It was a thought both exciting and daunting to me, as I’d never done it before. But once I started writing, I realized that this was the right format for this story to be told. Plus I have a particularly special reason for posting this fic, which I will disclose in the last chapter. Until then, I hope you enjoy it.

P.S. Individual chapters will have their own warnings as needed.

Virgil rose up in the common room of the Mindscape, his face pale and pinched. His whole body was fraught with his very namesake: crackling beneath his skin, lacing in and out of his muscles and pulling tight to the point of being painful, hands trembling uncontrollably. Torn between fleeing to the comfort and safety of his room and being unable to move from where he stood.

After a moment, he literally shook himself out of his agitated state, flapping his hands vigorously to get out as much nervous energy as he could before blowing out a large breath of air. Then the anxious Side speed-walked to the couch and sat down. He pulled his feet up onto the seat cushions, tucked his legs in, then flipped his hood over his head before finally wrapping his arms around himself and curling into himself a bit.

How the hell was it possible for something to go from zero to a thousand all in the span of seconds?

It had started out like a normal session of ’What is Thomas’ crisis of the week?’, with all Sides present in Thomas’ living room: Roman and Remus in front of the TV, Patton in front of the blinds, Janus between the blinds and the couch, Logan next to the banisters and Virgil in his usual spot on the landing, with Thomas in the middle as always. The topic of discussion had been broached, which happened to be about Nico, Thomas’ latest crush. After a chance meeting at the mall, a monumental feat (though not as monumental as the fact that Thomas had gone to an actual mall), he and Thomas had been texting and hanging out intermittently for a few weeks now, with a little bit of awkward flirting here and there and some close intimate calls. After taking the time to get to know him better, Thomas found that he really liked Nico, and thoughts of taking whatever their friendship-relationship was to the next level had started flitting around his head, refusing to leave. So, he’d summoned his Sides into the real world for a talk on what to do.

Everyone had chimed in in their usual way. Roman immediately started proclaiming that grand gestures were the way to go for declarations of love while Remus butted in with inappropriate innuendo. Virgil put in his two cents on taking a more cautious approach to avoid potential humiliation before stepping back and letting the other louder Sides lead the conversation the rest of the time. Janus interjected his usual sarcastic commentary both on the other Sides’ comments and Thomas’ responses while also checking in to make sure that Thomas was really thinking through on what he wanted. And Logan and Patton –

Actually, that was the thing that had tipped Virgil off to the notion that something was off. During the whole meeting, the representations of Thomas’ mind and heart had both kept unusually quiet. Usually, Logan would be providing a pragmatic approach on what to do, even though it wasn’t his realm of expertise. And with Patton, this was clearly a matter of the heart, the very reason for the moral Side’s existence, so he would be coming up with suggestions on how Thomas could go about the matter with sincerity and empathy.

But…neither of them had given any counsel.

Patton had stood silently in his spot, one of his hands fidgeting with one of his hoodie sleeves hanging over his shoulders and mashing his lips together, eyes flitting continuously to the Side standing across from him, which was Logan.

And Logan…

Logan had been straight-backed and formal as always with his arms crossed over his chest, but Virgil noticed how tightly tucked in Logan’s arms were from their usual loose hold, as well as his furrowed brow and pursed lips. Logan clearly didn’t want to be there at all. Which, Virgil could understand, having been in that position many times before when all he’d wanted to do was run away and couldn’t.

But the thing was, Logan’s grumpy disposition had been like this for about two weeks and counting now. He’d taken to holing himself up in his room, citing work as his reason. The few times anyone ever saw him, which was during meals and movie nights, Logan stayed silent throughout the gatherings save for curt responses to any questions directed at him. Patton was the only one who saw more of Logan than the others; he was often the one allowed to enter Logan’s room to let him know when it was time to eat or coax him to join in on movie night. But it seemed that not even he could assuage whatever inner storm was rumbling within Logan.

Virgil had seen how it was starting to affect Patton as well. Even as they sat next to each other during meals or movie nights, Logan had continued to be standoffish and stiff while Patton sat there awkward and subdued, keeping a small distance between them and his trademark grin nowhere in sight. The fact that they hadn’t had their weekly date night during all that time either – at least, that’s what Virgil thought, since they usually hung out in the common room during their dates, and when he’d gone downstairs during those times lately, they’d been nowhere in sight – made it all the more worrisome.

Virgil had wondered long and hard about what had happened to turn Logan sour, and he didn’t dare approach Logan when he was like this. Sure, Virgil knew what it was like to be in a bad mood and to not want anyone trying to talk to him, but with him it was kind of expected. After innumerable instances when he’d snapped at the others when they got too close – an awareness that made him feel both ashamed and guilty – everyone had learned to back off and leave Virgil alone until he was feeling less likely to chew someone’s head off. He was trying to be better about it, and though Patton still checked in on him from time to time as a parental-ish figure would and Logan was still a godsend to him for panic attacks and the like, much like how Roman had started going to him when he hit a creative slump or needed to vent about any deep-seated insecurities, Virgil started doing the same with Roman for himself. And thus, trust and closeness built between them as Virgil practiced being open about his worries, a far cry from the antagonistic relationship they started out with, and he was thankful for it.

But while Virgil’s fury ran pure electric, spiking in the need to flee, to fight, to survive, when Logan was angry…it was unpredictable. As the face of neutrality in the gestalt that was Thomas, Logan always sought to maintain an even countenance at all times, able to be unruffled by any setbacks. He was the ‘serious’ one, the Side who was the steadfast foil to the others’ unbridled chaos. Unfortunately, this rigid, perfectionist inclination led Logan to become a natural at repressing his emotions, second only to Patton. In his perception, emotions weren’t needed in logical reasoning and rational thought so it was expected for Logic to do without (though Virgil and everyone else had always argued otherwise and would continue to). On the other hand, Patton – as the source of Thomas’ empathy and carefreeness – was able to express emotions freely, despite his own bad habit of expressing only the good emotions. A double standard if Virgil was thinking honestly (and it wasn’t a slight at Patton either, just an observation).

So, Logan never learned how to deal with emotions properly and just let them fester inside. A cold simmer. Hardened fractals fighting against heat. Bitter grudge roiling and churning at a ceaseless pace before reaching a boiling point. Logan could snap into fiery ire at the slightest provocation – like when he threw the paper ball at puppet Roman – or maintain an icy air for days, like now. And the inconsistency made it both tricky and daunting.

There was one incident Virgil was aware about that served as the only clue as to why Logan was upset. When he shared his worries about what was going on with Roman privately, the prince hadn’t been as concerned as he was. However, Roman did mention offhandedly that he’d overheard Remus telling Janus something about how he’d managed to mess around with both Thomas and Logan, and it all had to do with Nico. So, against his better judgment, Virgil sought out the intrusive Side to inquire about what happened, and – after going through his usual schtick enough to raise Virgil’s hackles – Remus gleefully recounted the whole story.

What had happened was, Thomas had sent a heartfelt text to Nico which ended up being left unread for the better part of a day, and so the poor man had been feeling on edge all day, distraught by the apparent disregard. Logan had tried to be understanding and flexible with Thomas’ low mood while also attempting to get him to focus on his household chores. But Remus – chaotic rat gremlin man that he was – had taken to Thomas’ upset state with relish and spent all of the time torturing Thomas with reasons why Nico hadn’t said anything, thereby successfully distracting Thomas from his tasks despite Logan’s efforts. And then, just when Logan managed to fend Remus off and tried once more to wrangle Thomas into doing something like laundry or dishes, Nico finally replied back with an apology for the late reply, a valid reason why and an equally heartfelt sentiment back along with an invitation to attend an outdoor art exhibit. Thomas had happily accepted and run off, leaving behind a still-messy house and a frustrated Logan.

Virgil vaguely remembered that day. He’d stayed in his room the whole time but checked in periodically to make sure Thomas stayed safe, like when something tasted ‘screwy’ in Thomas’ breakfast oatmeal or when he realized with horror that Thomas had left the back porch door unlocked overnight. Then he and the others had joined Thomas on his excursion, watching from afar as he took in the outdoor art and chatted and laughed with Nico. Everyone had been relaxed and happy. Everyone, except Logan. Virgil had noticed Logan’s chilly demeanour then but didn’t think much of it, chalking it down to either fatigue from working all day or being disgruntled about doing something that wasn’t considered productive. His chest twinged in guilt at his past indifference.

But he was still puzzled as to why that particular incident would greatly affect Logan to this degree. The logical Side had been brushed aside before – not that that made it okay – so why was this leaving him so livid? Well, if Virgil was connecting the dots well enough, the central issue in all of this seemed to be Nico. He realized that whenever Nico was brought up, Logan’s mood would sour, and only lift when the topic was changed. Because Thomas was focusing a lot on Nico, his attention was being drawn away from other things like household chores and stuff – which were pertinent to Logan – and it was starting to get on the logical trait’s nerves. And that was why, since then, Logan’s bad mood had continued up until now.

Which brought them to today, to this meeting. And since they were discussing Nico, Logan’s apparent irritability – though still yet seemingly unnoticed by everyone else apart from Virgil and Patton (based on his body language) – had only grown.

Virgil's innate pessimism told him that this wasn’t going to end well.

It was right at that moment when Thomas then turned to Logan – whether because he’d finally noticed himself that Logan wasn’t saying anything or he’d been ignorant himself the whole time, it was up for debate – to ask him his opinion.

And Logan brushed him off coldly.

Thomas, bewildered but now seeing how upset Logan was, tried to cajole him.

But Logan was unmoving, unwilling.

Then Patton himself, at last, had tried speaking to Logan, quietly yet gently.

And Logan had snarled:

“Stay out of this! You’re not the Messiah! Stop trying to fix everything!”

The air in the room got sucked into a vacuum, leaving behind a lingering aether of shock, disbelief and…fear.

Because of the look on Patton’s face when Logan snapped at him.

Because of the look on Logan’s face when he realized what he’d done, what he’d said.

Virgil had taken one look between Patton and Logan –

And fled.

And now he was cowering on the couch, unable to stop his fingers from twisting themselves into numerous new pretzel shapes and his shoulders hunching up almost to his ears. He became aware for the first time that he was still wearing his sneakers, violating the ‘no shoes on the couch’ rule. But for once, he didn’t care. It didn’t matter. Nothing mattered compared to what was going on.

Before long, Virgil heard someone else rise up in the space, and he looked up to see Roman, his handsome face creased with concern.

For a moment, neither said anything, unsure and too overcome with worry about what was happening.

Roman opened his mouth –

Right when a barrage of furious thrums from outside the Mindscape pitched in volume.

Virgil and Roman’s heads snapped up towards the ceiling in alarm, the erratic hums pulsing in their ears. They were able to pick up the impression of a distressed tenor warbling unsteadily to intermittent crescendos, a restrained bass keeping consistently at low, trembling beats, and a jumpy baritone hiccupping erratically at sharp staccatos.

Due to some unexplainable, acoustical quirk, any conversations that took place outside the Mindscape were muffled and indistinct, allowing whoever was talking privacy and whoever was left behind some level of comfort if the topics were uncomfortable. If they had been real and living in a house of their own, it was the equivalent of hearing people talking in the apartment above them. If a Side really wanted to, they could tap in mentally to better listen to the conversation, and for a brief second Virgil was tempted to check in, but his dislike of confrontation was enough to stop him.

There really was no need to tap in.

It was clear what was happening.

Patton and Logan were fighting. And Thomas was caught in the middle.

Both Virgil and Roman tore their focus away from the ceiling and exchanged uneasy looks with each other, before Roman let out a heavy sigh and ran a hand through his immaculate locks.

“By the blessed memory of Jim Henson, this is turning into quite a quandary.”

Virgil leaned back further into the couch. “You can say that again.”

“If this keeps up, it’ll become like a typical day of the Muppet Show!”

Virgil raised an eyebrow. “You mean, filled with chaos, things going wrong, and at least one instance of a Muppet getting karate-chopped into the wall by Miss Piggy?”

“Yeah!” Roman nodded. Then his brow furrowed thoughtfully before he added on: “Well…at least with the first two. Although…”

Virgil shook his head firmly before Roman could finish. “Logan and Patton would never do that to each other. You know that.”

“I know. It’s just…”

Roman looked back up towards the ceiling, the worry on his face deepening.

Virgil understood. The few times Patton and Logan had argued, it had been for small, insignificant things. Like Logan staying up way too late doing work although he was constantly chiding the others for not following a proper sleep schedule. Or Patton literally getting his hand caught inside the cookie jar trying to snaffle an extra cookie before dinner. Any disagreement they went through was usually resolved with a kiss and a compromise, and they always managed to pull through and move on.

But this…

This was big.

And bad.

What if this time was different?

What if –

Virgil shook his head vigorously to stop the spiral in its tracks. Then he clicked his tongue to get Roman’s attention, who was still staring up at the ceiling. Once Roman’s gaze was on him, Virgil motioned with his head for the fanciful trait to come sit down on the couch with him.

Roman sighed and complied, lacing his fingers together in his lap and staring down at the ground morosely.

Virgil gave Roman a sympathetic look. “It’ll be okay, Princey,” he murmured. “Patton and Logan love each other too much to let something like this get to them.” He wasn’t sure if he was trying to convince himself, Roman, or both. Probably both. Even he was feeling uncertain.

Roman nodded, but didn’t respond. So, they both sat there in silence, trying to ignore the incessant murmurs of the argument that continued to reverberate both in the Mindscape and their heads.

It had bound to happen sooner or later, the couple’s first major spat. It was expected. No relationship was perfect. And Logic and Morality were profoundly different from each other on a fundamental level, so there would always be a base level of friction between them no matter how much they worked at making their relationship work. But no one in all the time they’d come into existence could recall an argument as fierce as the one occurring between Patton and Logan at that moment.

Sure, there had been the big one between Emotions and Self-Preservation when they were children, which led to everyone upgrading to more mature and complex roles than what they’d held before – though not yet the more permanent roles they embodied now – and the separation into Light and Dark.

Then, of course, everyone had been unwilling bystanders at one point or another in the many explosive rows between Creativity and Logic throughout the years as Thomas found himself drifting from his steady chemical engineering job to a more creative career on YouTube.

And once Thomas was well into adulthood and the Sides started revealing themselves to him one by one, along with their quirks and bonds and baggage, whenever Roman and Remus engaged in battle (both physical and verbal) or Virgil and Janus launched into a snark-off…well, things were lively, that was for sure.

But this fight between Logan and Patton since they’d become a couple nearly three months ago…it was something terrifying and distressing to behold. Or at least listen to, partially.

Clutching his arms tightly, Virgil scrunched up the fabric of his hoodie until he was gripping a good handful of fabric in each white-knuckled fist to give himself something to hold, something to tether him to the present. He mashed his lips together hard and curled into himself more. He really hated this. How did it come to this? What had happened to make Patton and Logan – who were usually so loving and sweet with each other, sometimes to a nauseating degree – suddenly go at each other’s throats? Were they going to break up? Oh god, how was everyone else going to navigate a separation between Sides who couldn’t just leave? Were they going to have to choose sides? Or Sides, even? God, he hated this –

A warm weight on his knee jolted Virgil out of his thoughts, and he looked up to see Roman looking at him worriedly. Virgil blinked at the prince then at the hand that was on his knee before exhaling and closing his eyes.

Roman said nothing, but even as he turned his head away, he kept his hand on Virgil’s knee and stroked it lightly with his thumb, and he took it as a good sign when Virgil didn’t shove it off.

Shortly after, another presence rose up in the space, and Virgil and Roman looked up expecting their resident couple. But it was Janus. And he himself looked unusually troubled.

“Jee-muh-nettie,” he muttered under his breath, smoothing out his outfit. “If that isn’t a mess, then I don’t know what is.”

Roman eyed the snake-like Side incredulously. “Wow. Even E-Lies-a Dolittle’s on edge about what’s happening?”

Janus arched an unimpressed eyebrow. “Really, Roman? That’s the name you went with?”

Roman glowered at Janus and threw a hand up. “It was the best I could come up with! B’sides, I’m not exactly in a creative mood at the moment!”

Janus rolled his eyes at Roman’s dramaticism, but, truthfully, he was not all that put-out by what he supposed was intended to be an insulting name by the prince.

“Anyways, I have no idea what you’re talking about. Obviously, things are going peachy-keen, fine-and-dandy upstairs.”

Virgil rolled his own eyes. “Yeah, right. Like you didn’t just pop up in here lookin’ like you’d lost a friend.”

Janus eyed Virgil coolly. “What is it to you if I do?”

Virgil shrugged flippantly. “Nothing. Just don’t go ‘round actin’ like you’re not upset about your two new friends fighting.”

Janus glowered at the emo and tugged at his gloves delicately. “Please. As if I care even a whit about either Morality or Logic.”

Virgil scowled back at him, and both seemed positioned for an argument of their own.

However, before they could, they were interrupted by a confused prince.

“Wait…did you mean morality and logic, or Morality and Logic?”

Deceit and Anxiety turned towards Creativity with bewildered expressions.

“Huh?” they both chorused.

Roman continued. “Were you talking about Patton and Logan with their official titles, or the concepts of logic and morality themselves?”

Virgil blinked at Roman in surprise before his brow furrowed in a thoughtful half-frown. “I think he meant Patton and Logan.”

“Really? Now, see, I thought he was referring more to the concepts.”

Virgil and Roman fell into a debate then, completely forgetting about Deceit. Janus stood there bemused for a moment but then shrugged, thankful that the conversation had moved away from him.

He moved to perch himself on one of the armrests of Logan’s armchair, keeping proper posture and continuing to groom himself with an unaffected air. But, inwardly, Janus was just as worried as the others. Since he built better ties with both Patton and Logan after everything that had happened, Janus secretly hoped for the continued success of their relationship, though he would always deny otherwise. And not just because it meant that Thomas had a better grasp of weighing his heart and mind in his hands for important affairs. But the argument that was currently going on now…even Janus was feeling a little apprehensive.

Then the commotion outside of the Mindscape suddenly dropped to nothing, and an eerie calm followed. Janus sat up straighter and Virgil and Roman instantly ceased their own argument, falling deathly silent.

“I think they’re finally finished,” Janus said quietly. “Everyone, look sharp.”

A schwing sliced through the air, and everyone’s heads whipped towards the top of the couch where Remus was lounging like a French girl and idly turning Roman’s katana in his hand.

“Already prepared!” Remus chirped.

Roman sputtered in mixed bewilderment and indignation at how Remus had managed to paw his sword without his knowledge. Virgil leaned away from the intrusive Side and the sharp weapon with a hiss.

But before anyone else could react, two wooshes sounded off in the middle of the common room, and everyone’s heads – including Remus’ – whipped back forward.

And, sure enough, there – standing a few feet apart from each other – were Patton and Logan.

Logan looked as though he’d been wrung through the wringer: clothes rumpled, hair mussed, shoulders slumped and face drawn, looking at Patton with distraught eyes.

Patton had his hands balled tightly into fists by his sides, his face scrunched up and red, and he was shaking slightly.

The rest of the Sides kept still and quiet in that moment, watching and waiting.

Then Patton started storming towards the stairs.

Logan whipped out a hand and caught Patton by the wrist, preventing him from leaving.

Patton tried to wrench himself out of Logan’s grasp but Logan held on, a desperate look on his face.

“Sweetheart,” he pleaded throatily.

Patton stilled and ceased his struggling, not looking at Logan or anyone else, his expression almost hidden away from everyone. Logan then shifted his hand so that he was holding Patton’s hand properly, though he didn’t do or say anything more than that. Patton gave no indication whether he welcomed or abhorred the tender action.

Everyone held their breath, wondering what was going to happen next. How would Patton react? Was he going to blow up? What was Logan going to say or do? Would he be able to deescalate the situation?

“I –”

Virgil watched Logan’s Adam’s apple convulse as he swallowed, evidently having difficulty with his words. The rational trait was rattled; the argument had clearly affected him. And Patton…poor Patton. He gave off the air of someone who wanted nothing more in the world than to hide away from everyone and everything for all time. Virgil’s heart ached for his two friends, eyes flitting apprehensively between them.

When Logan tried to speak again, his voice was unsteady, saturated with guilt and remorse. Brittle glass on the verge of shattering.

“May…may I come by later?”

Patton stayed silent, unmoving, still not looking at Logan or anyone else.

For what felt like forever, nobody dared move, speak or even breathe. The air was taut with tension, an elastic band on the verge of snapping in half. Even Remus was still, though whether out of genuine respect or morbid anticipation, no one was certain or cared to think about.

Even though Patton’s face was turned away from everyone else, Virgil, from where he was sitting, thought – with a sinking heart – that he could see the beginnings of glistening trails streaking down the moral Side’s cheeks.

Then – happening so quickly if one wasn’t looking for it – Patton gave Logan’s hand a quick, spastic squeeze.

Somehow that seemed to be the answer Logan was looking for, because he finally let go of Patton.

Once freed, Patton proceeded to dash up the stairs to his room, the sound of his door slamming shut echoing throughout the Mindscape.

10 notes · View notes

melanie-adia-of-the-multiverse · 2 years

Text

Everything Could Use More Ducks

Summary: The want for perfection is a universal inclination to possess, but Logan and Patton are going to find that sometimes the unexpected makes for the most beautiful memories and experiences.

A.K.A. An overly-long fic about Logicality’s first date and kiss.

Part 2 of Light and Tenderness Verse

Pairing: Logicality

Word Count: 23,585

Genre: Fluff with some Angst (it was supposed to be mostly fluff with the barest traces of angst but that’s the direction writing took me in as I was going along)

Warnings: Self-doubt, self-worth issues, self-esteem issues, some lingering tension from past canon conflicts (POF), food, kissing, swearing, crude language, explicit language, sexual humour, gross/disturbing facts and imagery (those last five are all Remus alone), Remus being Remus (I mean, he really goes to town in this one; also unplanned but it’s how it unfolded)

AO3 Link

Part 1: AO3 Tumblr

Author’s Note: Hello, all. It’s been a while but I’ve returned with another story. It also just occurred to me that I’m posting this story a week later from when I posted it on AO3 much like the first one (this time for Logan’s ‘birthday’/appreciation day). A funny coincidence, though I hope this doesn’t turn into a pattern. I admit to having more difficulty writing this new installment. With LaT, I knew exactly how it was going to pan out and planned it out to a tee with some room for freestyling. Here, I had less of a clear vision beyond the premise (Logicality going on their first date and having their first kiss) so I ended up doing a lot of freestyling, which I’m not accustomed to. Although there was a thrill in letting myself see where my writing would take me with little boundaries, I often found myself getting stuck more often than I’m comfortable with. So, my confidence in this final product is more shaky. But it’s finished and I hope it still provides some level of entertainment, and I know how to better approach the process for the next story. My waffling probably wasn’t necessary but I felt a need to explain myself. With that said, thank you for your time, take care, be safe, and enjoy.

Roman prided himself as a Side who rose to any challenge, but even he could (privately) admit when such a challenge that stumped him came along. Though, this time, it wasn’t the request that threw him off. It was the requester.

“I’m sorry, could you repeat that again?”

Logan huffed irritably. “Did I not articulate about my request adequately, Roman?”

“Oh, no, no! I heard you crystal clear, Specs! I just wanted to hear it again for clarification!” Roman smirked at the logical trait, his eyes glittering with amusement and intrigue. “After all, it isn’t everyday that you, Logan, comes to me, the remarkable, ravishing Roman, for romantic advice!”

Logan sighed and turned around to head back to his room, muttering under his breath: “If you’re not going to take this seriously, I’ll just try to figure it out on my own. Or seek someone else’s guidance –”

Roman shot out a hand and grabbed the crook of Logan’s elbow, preventing him from leaving. “Hey, hey. I was playin’ around, Lo. I’ll hear you out, okay?”

Logan looked back at the romantic figment. Roman at least had the decency to look contrite, and he seemed sincere enough. Logan stared at him a moment longer before motioning towards Roman’s room with an incline of his head.

Roman grinned wide and all but yanked Logan inside before locking the door for good measure to ensure privacy. He turned around and jogged towards his bed, spinning around and jumping backwards to land on it with a graceful – in his opinion – wump. Logan elected to sit down on Roman’s desk chair, keeping his perfect posture and legs pressed together, feet flat on the floor. When they’d both gotten comfortable, Roman crossed one of his legs over the other, rested interlocked hands over his knees and leaned forward with eager expression and eyes.

“All right, Teach. Spill.”

Logan blinked in confusion. “Spill what? I didn’t bring any liquids with me.”

Roman rolled his eyes and waved an exasperated hand. “No, no! Tell me what is troubling you romantically!”

“Oh. Right. Apologies.”

Logan fiddled with his tie for a moment before folding his hands primly in his lap, eyes fixed on the ground.

“I…wish to treat Patton to a…romantic excursion,” he mumbled, the apples of his cheeks turning rosy.

Roman blinked for a moment before his head clicked what Logan had meant. He trilled and clapped his hands excitedly, eyes shining. “That is fantastic! Your very first date! Oh, what a joyous occasion for you lens-wearing lovebirds!”

Logan rolled his eyes at Roman’s enthusiasm, but the deepening colour of his cheeks and his lips twitching upwards belied his aloofness.

“It’s about gosh darn time, too!” Roman continued. “The two of you have been together long enough!”

Logan arched an eyebrow. “ ‘Long enough’? We’ve been a couple for ten days, fourteen hours, twenty-seven minutes and counting.”

“Like I said: long enough!”

Roman leapt to his feet and started pacing around his room, his eyes already alight with inspiration.

“Now then, we hafta decide on what you’re actually gonna do on the date. Of course, we gotta make sure it’s something both of you like. Now, what would that be…”

“Well, actually, I did have an idea –”

“Wait! I’ve got it!” Roman gasped. “Ducks!”

Simultaneously, Logan’s face went blank and he hunched his shoulders slightly as though anticipating rainfall or some heavy object to fall on his head.

“…What?”

“Ducks!” Roman repeated, the ruby ribbons laced throughout his cinnamon eyes glittering like the last trails of colour and light after a fireworks finale. “You two should go to a pond and feed ducks! It’s got the cute, fuzzy animal factor for our puffball, and you can infodump about any duck-related facts you’ve got rattling around in that big dome of yours! There’s this secluded yet quaint lil’ pond in my side of the Imagination that would be just perfect!”

“Well, yes, but – ”

“But I think it’s empty right now, so I would just hafta conjure up some ducks! How many should I put in? Five? Mmm, no. Too little. Fifteen? Maybe. Though, the pond’s pretty big soooo you know what? Better make it fifty.”

“Wait, hold on –”

“No, wait! You know what? We should make it a parade of ducks! Yes! I’ll conjure up fifty ducks and make sure they put on a show for you that neither of you will ever forget!”

“But, I –”

But Roman kept on going, too caught up in his excitement to listen to Logan.

“So! Here’s what we’ll do…I’ll give you directions to the pond so you both don’t get lost on the way, and before you enter the Imagination, I’ll conjure them up and make sure they’re all sorts of different species! That way we get a nice variety and be able to have colour-coordinated sections!”

“Roman –”

“Ooh! Ooh! You know what else we should have? Kazoos! YES! I’ll teach them to play kazoos and when you two arrive at the pond, they’ll serenade Patton with a rendition of ‘Some Enchanted Evening’ while spelling out the phrase ‘LOGAN HEART PATTON’! But, if you don’t want too much attention on you, we can just use ‘I’ instead of your name.”

“Roman…”

“And then they’ll all leap into the pond and conclude with a synchronized swimming routine! Bam! Perfect evening! Although, it’d be a lil’ much for me to train fifty ducks on my own. Not that I couldn’t or wouldn’t do it! Maybe I should probably conjure up a choreographer…actually, you know what, maybe an animal trainer, too –”

“ROMAN!”

Roman stopped dead in his tracks and turned to stare at his sensible counterpart, equally put out by the interruption and bemused by Logan’s outburst.

Logan took a cleansing breath to quell his exasperation and pushed his glasses up his nose. “As much as I appreciate your…enthusiasm, I had something less exuberant in mind for the date.”

Roman made a face. “Lemme guess. Something uber doober boring like doing a jigsaw puzzle? Or reading one of your murder mystery books out loud?”

Logan glowered at the princely trait. “Actually, I was thinking along the lines of taking Patton for an afternoon walk through the Imagination, and ending it with a picnic around sunset.”

Roman opened his mouth to make a retort, then stopped and closed it again, blinking at Logan. “Huh. That is…actually quite romantic,” he said, a little impressed.

Logan preened a little, looking pleased with himself. Of course it was a good idea. He thought of it.

Roman made his way back to his bed and sat back down. He needed to catch his breath and rest his feet after all the pacing and talking he’d been doing not even a minute before. “Is it safe for me to assume that this is why you came to me?” he asked.

Logan nodded. “Indeed. Since you are in charge of one half of the Imagination, it seemed only logical to approach you in order to gain access to it. At least for an hour or so. I certainly wasn’t going to go to Remus for his half.”

Roman winced. “Yeeeaaah, probably a good idea. That wouldn’t fly well with Patton.”

Logan nodded in agreement, his eyes softening just a touch at the mention of Patton. Roman noticed but said nothing about it.

“So, did you have something in mind for how you want the Imagination to look like on your date?”

“I do, actually.”

“All right, then. Spit it out.”

Logan reared back slightly at that, face twisted with alarm and disgust. Then he shrugged and started working his jaw.

Quickly recognizing his mistake, Roman waved his hands hurriedly. “NO, not like that! Just tell me what you want!”

“Oh. Okay.”

Roman breathed an internal sigh of relief at his close call.

Logan reached into his pocket and took out a piece of folded paper, which he proceeded to unfold, smooth out and hold out to Roman. “I’ve done some research, and I’ve compiled a list of conditions and factors that, if adjusted just so, will ensure the ideal environment and setting for the date.”

Roman took the paper from Logan and read through its contents. His eyes slowly widened as he went down the list. Logan had taken into account every single factor he could think of and researched ways to ‘ensure the most optimal chance of dating success’ (Logan’s words, not Roman’s). The list ranged from things that were actually rather important and that Roman could easily accomplish like the ideal temperature (‘somewhere between 70 to 77 degrees Fahrenheit, or 21 to 25 degrees Celsius’), to absurd stuff like the softness of grass (‘to prevent, or at least reduce, the likelihood of irritation or ticklishness, as Patton has sensitive skin’). He also noted that the date was to take place a week from today. Well, that was good. At least Logan was giving him ample time to tweak and mold the Imagination into the requested dimensions until it was just right.

When he was done, Roman looked back up at Logan. “You really put a lot of thought into this, didn’t you?”

Logan lowered his head a bit as though shy, but he nodded. “Well…yes. It’s only natural. I want Patton to be happy. And for him to have an enjoyable time.”

As he said this, a soft look came over Logan’s face, and his lips curled up into a rare tiny smile. Roman took advantage of the ensuing quiet that followed to observe the change in Logan’s demeanour. Falling in love with Patton had really had a positive effect on Logan. He was still his serious, stick-in-the-mud self, but his sharp edges had been softened. He clearly wanted his date with Patton to go well, considering the amount of effort he had gone through to compose the list. It was very in line with Logan’s sensibilities, which made Roman chuckle inwardly. He was a nerd, but he was their nerd.

Then Roman thought of something and he furrowed his brow. “Hold on…don’t you hate picnics? I think I kinda remember one time we all went for a picnic in the Imagination and you spent the whole time complaining about eating on the ground and getting eaten alive by bugs!”

Logan flushed at this and looked away, fidgeting uncomfortably.

“Specs?”

“…Again, ‘hate’ is a strong word to use…but…you aren’t incorrect in that assessment.”

“Then why are you going for this? Why make yourself uncomfortable doing something you don’t like? Why not something more along the lines of what you like? Like stargazing or something?”

Logan’s demeanor changed instantly at these words. His dreaminess – which had dimmed slightly at Roman’s first query – fell away completely to reveal a timider interior that the others were very rarely privy to. It honestly caught Roman off guard. The teacher’s self-confidence seemed to dissipate and was replaced by uncertainty and meekness. He looked down at his hands clasped in his lap and avoided eye contact. He stayed quiet for a moment, and Roman waited patiently, giving Logan the space he needed to speak freely and without judgment on his own time.

“This is my chance to really make Patton happy,” Logan finally said, quietly and morosely. “After everything that’s gone on, he deserves something special…to feel special. In a way, I feel like I have a lot to make up for the way I regarded and treated him in the past, even though it seems that he doesn’t hold me in contempt or bear any grudge for it. But…I guess I still feel some level of guilt that I’m not able to assuage. So, I feel compelled to make a great effort to really make this date special for him and make sure nothing goes wrong.”

Roman’s frown deepened as he watched the rational figment before him wilt and falter. He mashed his lips together. Even though he could be a little self-absorbed, Roman still cared for his loved ones, and it was unnerving to see Logan so unsure of himself and vulnerable.

If he was honest…Roman admired how far Logan had come. They were both similar in how opinionated and arrogant they could be, as much as that was difficult for him to admit to himself sometimes. So, to see how Logan had grown more thoughtful of others – like how he’d taken Patton’s own wants and needs into account to do an activity on their date that Patton liked – and how he tried to be better than how he was before…it was more than Roman could ever hope to achieve. Logan had been the first to reach out and try to repair the discord that had taken place after ‘The Incident’, whilst Roman had hidden himself away in his room, smarting and spiteful. It made sense; Logan had always possessed a maturity Roman himself could never duplicate.

Then Roman shook himself internally. No time for self-pity now. Someone else’s spirits needed lifting up.

Roman got up from the bed and slowly made his way to Logan, kneeling down in front of him. He paused for a moment before raising his hands and resting them on Logan’s knees.

Logan started a bit and looked up at Roman with surprised eyes. Roman smiled kindly at Logan and gave his knees a gentle squeeze.

“Listen…I know we haven’t always been buddy-buddy in the past, but it’ll all be fine. You and Patton are made for each other. And I’ve seen how he’s been since you started dating. He’s doing better than ever. And that’s just you being you. So, you’re doing something right. You’re good.”

Logan looked at Roman, parsing his words. Then his face broke into a small, grateful smile and he placed his hands on top of Roman’s, giving them a squeeze back. “Thank you, Roman,” he murmured. Roman grinned back at him, glad to see some cheer coming back to their beloved nerd.

Right at that moment, an enthusiastic knock sounded on Roman’s door, making Roman and Logan jump and breaking the moment.

“Hey, Roman! You in there, kiddo?” a cheerful voice called out.

It was Patton.

Logan froze like a deer caught in headlights and Roman shook himself out of his surprise to give an answer.

“Yes, I am, Padre! You need something?”

“Oh, no! I just came over to let you know that dinner’ll be ready in a few minutes!”

Dinner?

Both Roman and Logan looked over at the gold-plated, sunburst-shaped clock on the wall, and their eyes widened. They hadn’t realized how much time had passed since Logan stopped by.

“Oh! Okay! Sorry, Patton! I didn’t realize the time!”

“No worries, kiddo! I know how you can get preoccupied with your projects!”

The two Sides watched the shadow under Roman’s door start to recede as Patton turned away – presumably to continue his mission of letting everyone know about dinner – when it stopped abruptly.

“Oh! Roman! By the way, do you happen to know where Logan is? I stopped by his room before yours and he wasn’t there.”

Logan paled slightly and Roman racked his brains quickly for something to say in his defense. He just hoped that the verbal fabrication wouldn’t be too extreme. He didn’t want a certain snake to sneak his way into his ‘Sanctuary of Solitude’ right this moment.

“I – I don’t, actually. Sorry! Um...did you check his study? Or his lab? You know how hyper-focused he can get.” Roman heard a thoughtful hum in response.

“I did think about that, but I didn’t wanna go in without permission. I know how protective he can be of his personal space.”

Logan’s face softened and he opened his mouth to say that Patton was always welcome to check in on him no matter where he was and what he was doing, forgetting where he was for a second. Roman waved a hand frantically for Logan to keep quiet, and Logan snapped his mouth shut, remembering.

“Roman?”

“Yes, yes! I’m still here! Sorry! Y’know, I’m sure he won’t mind if you go in. You are lovers now!”

“Yeah, we are…but I still wanna make sure I don’t cross any boundaries where I shouldn’t. I don’t wanna make him mad or anything.”

Patton’s voice sounded quiet and uncertain. Logan’s face fell at that. He never wanted Patton to feel like he couldn’t ever go into his room for any reason. He supposed that it didn’t help how impatient and short he had been in the past whenever anyone ever came into his room without permission or invitation. Roman looked at him in sympathy and squeezed his knee.

“Well, I’m sure he can’t be gone simply like that! He probably just went to the bathroom or something! Or maybe he’s with Virgil? You know how the emo often goes to him when he’s having one of his attacks.”

The shadow didn’t move but Roman had a feeling that Patton was nodding in agreement. “Yeah, maybe. I’m actually on my way to Virgil’s room right now, so we’ll see. See ya in a bit, kiddo!”

“Will do! Thanks again, Pat!”

Once the shadow was gone, Logan let out a breath he didn’t realize he’d been holding and ran a hand through his hair. “That was close. Thank you, Roman,” he said shakily.

Roman smiled and patted Logan’s hand. “No prob, Bob.”

Logan blinked. “I’m Logan.”

Roman rolled his eyes. “Of course, Steven Universe would fly over your head. You really need to be more up-to-date with pop culture references, Teach.”

Logan stuck his nose in the air. “At least I’m not always stuck in Never Never Land like you.”

“Rude. And also, I think you mean La La Land.”

“Isn’t it the same thing?”

“No! Both are completely different places!”

“But they’re both rife with unrealistic, fantastical elements, so my point still stands!”

“Oh, for the love of Dionysus! – ”

Roman and Logan glared at each other for a moment. Then their mouths started twitching, and before long they were laughing.

When their chuckles died down. Logan stood up and smoothed his tie out. “I should get going. I don’t want Patton to get any more worried than he is now.”

Roman nodded, wincing at the creaks in his knees as he stood back up. “Yeah. Maybe if you move fast enough, you can get back to your room before he comes back to check on you again.”

“That is my plan, yes.”

Logan got himself in position and was just about to sink out when Roman called out to him. He stopped and turned back towards Roman.

Roman chuckled sheepishly and rubbed the back of his neck. “I, uh…sorry about earlier. With the whole duck thing. And not listening to you. I guess I got a little over-excited. So, sorry about that.”

Logan’s face softened and he shook his head. “It’s all right, Roman. Really.” Roman’s idea had been a little much, but that was how Roman was. He was Creativity, after all. There was nothing wrong with allowing inspiration to flow freely when it was present in the moment. But Logan did appreciate Roman’s acknowledgement of and apology for the indirect disregard. “Also, thank you again for helping me out,” he continued. “Both for the date and making sure Patton didn’t know I was here. I really appreciate it.”

Roman waved an airy hand. “No trouble at all, Lo. See you at dinner.”

Logan nodded once with a small smile and adjusted his glasses before sinking out. After waving Logan out, Roman picked up Logan’s list and started reading through it again. Logan’s specifications were really…specific. Roman was a little unsure if he would be able to get everything just right, but he was going to try. Patton and Logan were going to have the best first date of all first dates!

But first, dinner.

Roman folded the paper back up, slipped it into his pocket and primped himself up a bit in his mirror before heading downstairs for dinner. As he did, he thought to himself that Patton and Logan’s date could still use more ducks.

*******

Three days later, Roman was in the common room, writing in his trusty notebook. A while back he’d started a new story when something Thomas had said inspired him, and then it got left on the back burner when another busy video-editing session came around, so he was trying to get back into it. Normally, Roman would write in his room since it enhanced his creative ability, but sometimes it got a little stifling and then Roman wasn’t able to get anything done. So, he’d read online that sometimes a change of scenery was a good way of clearing a writer’s head and allowing them to get some work done, hence why he’d moved to the common room for that mid-morning.

Roman let out a groan and ran a hand through his hair. This stupid short story was stumping him big time. He’d been working on it for a couple hours now and he was still stuck on this one particular part. What was the point of him being Creativity if he couldn’t come up with stuff?

Immediately after that thought floated by, Roman shook his head vigorously. No. None of that. No more bad self-talk. It wasn’t good for him as Thomas’ Ego, especially when it could lead down a slippery slope to a ‘creative block’ – he shuddered violently at the thought. Plus, he didn’t want to revisit the bad feelings he’d felt after ‘you know what’. That was in the past. Everyone was friends again (well, most of them; some of them were still on precarious ground but had promised (through gritted teeth) to try their best to get along for Thomas’ sake), and it would be nice to keep it that way.

After a few more minutes, Roman gave up and put down his notebook and pen. He was clearly getting nowhere. Maybe he should take a quick break before giving it another go.

He took Logan’s list out of his pocket and looked through it again. Whenever he completed a requirement, he made sure to tick it off. At this point he’d ticked off almost half of the requirements, which was good. A few were proving to be a little tricky but Roman figured he’d be able to find a work-around for them. He still had a few more days to get everything done.

Roman sighed. He really, really, REALLY wanted Logan to be pleased with his work, and to get it just right for him and Patton, seeing how much this meant to Logan. Roman was a perfectionist so anything creative he worked on couldn’t be half-assed. He was still learning to not be too hard on himself or hold himself to high impossible standards, but that was easier said than done.

“Hey, Roman!”

Roman jumped and let out an “Eep!”. He looked up to see Patton standing on the raised landing at the bottom of the stairs.

“Oh! Sorry, kiddo! Didn’t mean to make ya jump!”

Roman hurriedly shoved the paper back into his pocket. “N-No worries, Padre!”

If Patton noticed Roman acting strangely, he said nothing. He figured that if it was something private, he wasn’t going to stick his nose in Roman’s business. He wasn’t going to do that anymore. That’s how things went wrong.

Getting a handle on his composure and putting on a charming smile, Roman looked up at Patton. “How are you doing on this fine morning?”

Patton smiled back. “I’m doin’ good! Thanks for askin’! How ‘bout you?”

Roman shrugged. “As peachy as I can be. Just trying to work on this story here.”

“Oh! I’m sorry! I’d no idea. I can talk to you later if you want – ”

“No, no, no!” Roman waved his hands reassuringly. “It’s fine, Pat! I’m on a break, anyway.”

Patton looked at him uncertainly. “You sure?”

“Positive, Padre.”

A look of relief swept over Patton’s face before he made his way over and settled himself down next to Roman on the couch, slipping off his sneakers and pulling his legs up so he could sit cross-legged. Roman took a moment to take in Patton’s body language: his posture was better than normal, and his shoulders were more relaxed. Clearly dating wasn’t only doing wonders for just Logan.

“So, you wanted to talk to me about something?”

Patton, at this point, looked back towards the stairs as though anticipating that someone was going to come down at any moment. Roman had a hunch the ‘someone’ Patton was looking out for was Logan. But Logan worked in the mornings so luckily there was no fear of any eavesdropping or walking in.

When he was sure that the coast was clear, Patton turned back to Roman. “Yeah, I did. I actually need your help for something.”

Roman leaned forward, interest piqued. “On what?”

“My date with Logan.”

Upon saying Logan’s name, Patton’s cheeks turned rosy and a dreamy expression came over his face. Being the Side of romance, Roman could recognize even the subtlest of love signs, and here was a Side who was a smitten kitten over his sweetheart.

Roman smiled at the paternal trait. “Looks like things are going well with you and Teach!”

Patton nodded, his smile widening and the colour of his cheeks deepening. He ducked his head momentarily in mixed embarrassment and fondness. “Yeah,” he mumbled eloquently.

Roman grinned and chuckled. “Sorry, couldn’t resist. What did you need?”

After getting himself back under control, Patton straightened up and took a breath. “So, my date with Logan is coming up in four days…”

Roman nodded, outwardly showing that he was paying attention, but inwardly he was concentrating hard on thinking his words through before he spoke. Logan had explicitly stated that his whole picnic thing was to be a surprise for Patton, and Roman didn’t want to mess it up for either of them if he misspoke, so he had to be extra careful. “Go on.”

Patton played with his fingers. “I…want to do something special for Logan.”

Roman cocked his head. “In terms of what?”

“Like, how I want the date to go.”

Roman furrowed his brows, feeling a tinge of not necessarily panic but a sense that things were about to get complicated. For him, at least.

“I see. What did you wanna do?”

Patton clasped his hands in his lap. For a moment, a vision of Logan doing the exact same thing flitted through Roman’s mind. Geez, these two were already similar enough in appearance since they looked like Thomas (okay, they ALL looked like Thomas) and wore the same glasses, but they were already starting to adopt each other’s mannerisms. What a difference almost two weeks of dating can make.

“I wanna take Logan on a walk through the Imagination during the evening, and end it with a night of stargazing. Would you be able to set up the Imagination like that for me?”

Roman’s anxiety ratcheted up. Patton wanted an evening date. At the exact same time as the daytime date that Logan wanted. When he was halfway done with setting up the Imagination for Logan’s daytime date that he asked for help with three days ago. Oh, this was getting more than just complicated. This was getting borderline impossible.

Unfortunately, he was taking too long to reply, and Patton took Roman’s silence as disapproval. He bit the side of his lip, his mouth going a little lopsided as he did so. “I’m sorry. If it’s too much for you, or not possible, or not enough time, it’s totally fine, Roman. I don’t wanna push something on you that you don’t wanna do – ”

“No!”

Patton jumped and blinked at the princely trait. Roman gave himself an inward shake at his outburst and smiled what he hoped was a reassuring smile at the fatherly figure figment. “It’s all fine. I’ll do it.”

Patton’s eyes brightened. “Really?”

Roman nodded. “Really.”

Patton squealed and threw his arms around Roman to give him a big hug. “Thank you, thank you, thank you!”

Despite the rising anxiety within him at his predicament, Roman easily returned the hug. “It’s no trouble, Padre.”

When Patton pulled away from his hug attack, Roman leaned back into the couch, summoning a notepad and pen as he did so. “All right, I’m all ears.”

Patton grinned. “Well, I hope I don’t talk your ears off!”

That got a chuckle out of Roman, and Patton giggled along with him. Roman thought how if he’d said that idiom to Logan, the intellectual Side would have likely taken the phrase literally (as usual) and countered that Roman was not made up of ears and was a fully humanoid form. Don’t get him wrong, he was fond of the nerd, but it was nice to be able to make jokes and puns without causing confusion or alarm. That’s why he and Patton got along so well.

At any rate, once they’d sobered up, Roman dutifully listened and jotted down notes as Patton told him how he wanted the Imagination to look for his date idea, giving off the appearance of a calm, collected Side, though inwardly he still worried about how he was going to pull this off along with Logan’s request. He noticed how Patton was just as attentive as Logan had been about little details he wanted to get right, and just as eager to make sure that Logan would have a good time. Most of all, he realized that Patton had chosen an activity that Logan liked. He, also, was being thoughtful of his partner’s needs and wants and trying to make him happy. Thankfully, he wasn’t as intensive as Logan had been, but he was no less determined to make sure that everything would be just right.

“ – And, like, I wanna make sure the sky is as accurate as possible, with lots of constellations so we can look at them and Logan can talk to me about them. There’s one he’s mentioned before that he seems to really like a lot…I think it’s called – what was it? The Pilates Cluster? The Play-Doh Cluster?”

Roman froze in the middle of the sentence he was writing and looked up and blinked at Patton for a moment. Seconds later, he burst into peals of laughter.

Patton did a small double-take of surprise at Roman’s reaction. “Did I say something wrong?”

Roman’s only response was to laugh harder. Patton’s confusion grew.

Soon, Roman was able to come down from his laughing fit, trying to take deep breaths while wiping tears off of his face.

“I – I think you mean the Pleiades Cluster!”

Patton’s eyes widened before his cheeks turned strawberry-pink. “Oh…oops. I guess they sound pretty similar, huh?’ he said sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck.

Taking pity on him, Roman tried very hard to curb another laughing fit bubbling in his chest. He coughed a few times to get the urge out of his system so he was able to speak normally again.

“A-Anyway, yeah, sure, Pat. I’ll make sure to put that in the sky for you.”

Patton smiled through his flush. “Great, thanks.”

Another minute or so of talking later, Roman wrote down the last few notes and huffed out a breath. “All right. I think I got everything.”

Patton beamed at him. “Thanks, kiddo! I really appreciate this.”

Roman waved a hand. “Of course, Padre! It’s what I’m here for.”

A strange look came over Patton’s face then, one that Roman couldn’t decipher. Then Patton reached out and took one of Roman’s hands in both of his, his eyes heavy with an emotion that made Roman wonder if he’d said something wrong.

“Um, Patton?”

“I mean it, Roman,” Patton said earnestly. “I really do appreciate you helping me out. I have full trust in you. I know you’re gonna come up with something amazing.”

Roman’s mouth opened slightly at this, and his eyes felt a bit teary, touched as he was by Patton’s words. After what he did, how he’d treated Patton after ‘the thing we don’t talk about’, he almost felt unworthy of such genuine trust and faith. But Patton, blessed Patton, was looking so contrite and earnest that Roman couldn’t help but feel compelled to make his date idea come true, as tricky as it was going to be. He supposed, in a way, he also felt like he had to make amends, and this was a good way of doing so. And the most important thing was, he wanted to.

“I…thanks, Pat,” he whispered.

Patton’s smile turned softer and he squeezed Roman’s hand.

Roman took a moment to compose himself and he patted Patton’s knee with his other hand, managing to give him a smile.

“Just you wait and see, Padre, when I’m done, Specs won’t know what hit ‘im!”

“What’s that about me?”

Patton and Roman yelped in surprise and whipped their heads towards the stairs.

There was Logan, standing on the landing with a curious, amused expression on his face.

“H-Hi, honey!” Patton stammered out, face pink.

Logan’s face softened and he smiled softly. “Hello, love.” Then he turned towards Roman. “What was that about me you were just discussing?”

Roman panicked, scrambling to come up with something. “Oh! Um – we weren’t talkin’ about you! We were just discussing about…um, that is – “

“Ducks!”

Logan and Roman blinked at Patton. “What?” they chorused.

“Ducks!” Patton chirped again, his smile a little too wide to be comfortable. “We were talking about ducks! They’re just so cute, aren’t they? With the waddling and the quacking and that thing they do where they ruffle their feathers when they’re taking a bath! They’re just great! I love ducks! Don’t you love ducks?”

Patton said that last sentence to Roman, who immediately jumped in as if that had been the plan all along. Thank goodness for Thomas’ love of acting and knack for improv (most of the time). “Oh! Yes, of course! Ducks are truly splendid creatures! Aren’t they, Logan?”

Logan did a mini-double take of surprise at being asked this question by Roman, and he cleared his throat before answering. “I…yes, they are a rather fascinating species, though I don’t possess the same emotional attachment as either of you.” But he was distracted from what they’d actually been talking about, which greatly relieved the right-brained Sides.

“So, Logan, why’re you down here? Taking a break from working?”

Logan adjusted his glasses. “Yes. Actually, I’ve come down because Patton and I made plans to cook lunch together.”

Patton blinked and he looked at his watch. His eyes widened.

“Oh my gosh! Is it time, already? Man, time really does fly by when you’re talking! About ducks!”

Roman winced and subtly nudged Patton’s foot with his own. No need to keep beating a dead horse when there wasn’t even a horse to beat in the first place. (Ew. Why was he thinking like Remus?) Thankfully, Patton got the hint and Logan was none the wiser (or, if he did notice their strange behaviour, he said nothing).

Patton slipped his shoes back on and stood up, brushing his clothes off. “Well, I should get goin’. Thanks again, Roman!”

Roman gave Patton a warm smile. “Anytime, Padre! See you at lunch!”

Patton grinned at him and bent over for one last quick hug. Then he skipped over to Logan – who had a tender expression on his face – and they took each other’s hand before walking into the kitchen together.

Roman allowed himself a moment to watch this tender display, a small smile on his face before he gathered up his things and sank out to his room. He was truly happy for his friends. They looked so happy together. He was so glad things worked out for them, and seeing their love and care for one another made him more determined to make sure that their date went off without a hitch.

Speaking of which…

Once he was back in his room, Roman’s smile vanished and he let out a loud groan. He padded over to his bed and – after throwing his things haphazardly onto the bedspread – turned and collapsed on top of it, staring at the ceiling in a starfish position. He rubbed his face with his hands, the anxiety over his predicament back with a vengeance.

“Sweet Stephen King, what am I going to do?”

“Maybe not keel over and die from a heart attack, for starters?”

Roman let out a startled shriek and quickly sat up, hands clutching the front of his shirt and his heart hammering in his chest. He frantically looked around until his eyes fell on the source of the voice.

“Heavens above, Jack Scare-ington! Don’t do that!”

Virgil, standing with his arms crossed, lifted an unimpressed eyebrow. “Geez, Princey. Could you be any more on edge?”

Roman groaned again and sat up fully with his legs over the edge of his bed, bracing his elbows on his knees and burying his face in his hands. “You would be if you were in the position I’m in right now,” he mumbled into his hands. As startled as he had been, Roman was not too surprised at Virgil’s presence. He’d forgotten that, as the embodiment of Thomas’ anxiety, Virgil could feel when the other Sides were anxious. The little panic session he’d been having earlier must have been palpable enough to catch Virgil’s attention.

Virgil – who had risen up to chastise Roman for the erratic roller coaster ride he’d ridden for the last hour – surveyed the prince for a moment before coming over to sit on the floor next to Roman, lying on his back and resting his legs against the bed in a ‘L’ shape and his arms on his stomach.

“All right, Roman. Spit it out. What happened?”

“Logan AND Patton both came to me separately to tell me to design the Imagination in different ways for their date!”

Virgil grimaced. “Yikes. Now I understand why your anxiety levels were through the roof. But why didn’t you tell either of them you couldn’t or something?”

Roman exhaled heavily. “Because they both want it to be a surprise for each other.”

“Ah.”

A beat of silence followed, then Virgil exhaled.

“So, you wanna discuss a solution, or do you just want someone to listen?”

“Listen?”

“Sure.”

Roman started ranting about his problem, and Virgil kept quiet and listened, just allowing Roman to get it out of his system. He could see how worked up he was and he figured that yelling at him would’ve exacerbated it. Even though he didn’t give the impression with how broody and moody he appeared, Virgil was actually a good listener. He was skilled at sitting back and just letting the others talk out their problems. Part of it had to do with how he didn’t like to talk about himself, but it was also because of how he’d been suppressed and not listened to for so long that he just kind of learned how to listen. It was a little alarming how well he slipped into the role, and how often too. But he was fine with it. Mostly.

“ – And like, just, I dunno how I’m gonna be able to pull this off! Logan wants a bright blue sky with fluffy clouds so that there’s shade cover during their picnic, but that would interfere with Patton’s wish for a clear night sky for stargazing! It’s all just – UGH!”

Roman drew in a big breath after his rant and then flopped back onto his back, finally having run out of steam. He did feel a bit better, but it still didn’t solve the fact that he was still going to have to figure out how to make both of Logan’s and Patton’s requests come true. What to do, what to do?

Virgil shifted a bit and rested his hands behind his head. Then he reached up one hand as best as he could and patted Roman’s knee in what he hoped was a comforting manner, since it didn’t come easy to him.

“Yeah. It’s a really sticky situation. And the date’s four days away, too. Is there even a way to fulfill both of their requests at the same time before then?”

Wait. Hold on.

Roman sat up suddenly with a gasp. Virgil had to steady himself from falling head over heels in surprise.

“What the hell, Roman?!”

“That’s IT!”

Virgil looked up with a furrowed brow. “What’s ‘it’?”

Roman, bright light bulbs in his eyes, just pulled Virgil up so he was standing up and threw his arms around the emo in a hug.

“Virge! You’re a genius!”

Virgil, while trying to extricate himself from Roman’s hold, froze at the praise, blinking blankly. “I am?”

“Yes! I know what to do now! Thanks!”

Roman squeezed Virgil a final time before jumping up and bounding away to his desk. He sat down, grabbed a spare piece of paper lying around and a pencil and started furiously scribbling (or sketching? Virgil couldn’t really tell) something down, inspiration having struck him. Virgil stood there gaping in bewilderment and wondering what epiphany Roman had had and how what he had said had gotten the prince so fired up. He’d just been saying whatever had popped into his head without thinking too much. But then he shrugged. Roman seemed less tense now, and if he had an idea, he had an idea, so he wasn’t going to interrupt his creative process. He knew how hyper-focused Roman could be when he was in that state.

“ ‘kay, cool. Guess I’ll see you around, Princey.”

Roman waved a distracted hand back, still scribbling (or sketching, again, Virgil still couldn’t tell) like there was no tomorrow. Virgil rolled his eyes but it wasn’t with any true contempt, and he sank back to his room.

Roman felt a bit bad for ending his time with Virgil so abruptly. He’d have to make it up to him somehow later. But right now, he had a plan to…well, plan. He now knew what he could do to fulfill both of Patton’s and Logan’s requests with little time left.

It was going to be tricky. But he had a feeling that he might just be able to pull it off.

*******

The day of the date finally arrived, and Patton was alight with equal parts excitement and nervousness. He was currently sitting on Roman’s bed, looking up at Roman. “Thanks again for helping me out, kiddo,” he said earnestly.

Roman beamed, bouncing on the balls of his feet. “I’m honoured that you came to me, Padre! A momentous occasion such as this should not be taken lightly!”

Patton fiddled with his hoodie sleeves. “Yeah. I thought I’d know what to wear or how to look when the time came, but I honestly really don’t know how to go about it.”

"No need to fret, my frantic father figure friend!"

Patton beamed in appreciation at the quadruple alliteration and pointed double finger guns at Roman. "Nice."

Roman bowed with a flourish. "Thank you! Now then, what to do for you...”

Roman tapped his chin with a finger, brow furrowed in deep thought. Patton had told him that he wanted to wear a dress for the date, but he didn’t know what, and he didn’t really own dresses in his own closet. Luckily, Roman did, and since they were physical copies of Thomas, they were the same dress size, so at least Roman didn’t have to worry about fitting issues. It was just a matter of finding a dress that Patton would like, but which one?

Then his face lit up.

“Aha! I've got it!"

"What?"

Roman turned around without answering and jogged to his walk-in closet, the door opening by itself as the prince approached. Patton watched as Roman started looking through his collection, murmuring under his breath. After a moment or so, he grinned suddenly and pulled something out.

“There you are! You would look great in this!” Roman exclaimed, showing it to Patton. Upon closer inspection, Patton recognized it as the Grand Duchess gown from Anastasia.

“It’s pretty, but…maybe a little too formal?” he said, trying to go for a diplomatic tone.

Roman pouted a little but acquiesced and put the gown back. “Okay, something less formal…oh! Maybe this one?”

This next one was a simple pale green shift dress. Nothing more, nothing less.

“That’s nice…but maybe something with a pattern?”

Roman pouted again but dutifully turned back to the closet.

For the next minute or so, Roman took out a different dress every time. And every time there was always something that wasn’t right for Patton. Too busy. Not colourful enough. Too colourful. Etcetera, etcetera. Before long, a small pile of discarded dresses sat on the floor, and they still hadn’t found anything for Patton. The emotional Side hunched his shoulders slightly, feeling a bit guilty for shooting down Roman’s offerings. It seemed that history just couldn’t stop repeating itself.

“I’m sorry, Roman,” he said morosely. “They were all really pretty, I swear!”

Roman, who had started feeling a little frustrated, immediately softened at the sad tone in Patton’s voice, and he gave him a reassuring smile. “It’s okay, Pat. You’re just being choosy about what you wanna wear. And that’s a good thing! It means that when we do find the right dress, you’ll feel extra good about yourself! How about you think about what you’re really looking for? Maybe this way we’ll be able to narrow it down without going on a wild goose chase.”

“Honk.”

Both Roman and Patton snorted at that, which helped to lighten up the mood in the room.

Patton scrunched up his face, trying to really think about what he wanted to wear. He still wasn’t used to thinking for himself or his wants.

“Hmm…well, I do want it to still be a dress. Maybe something that’s…cute? Like, with a pattern or something that I like, like dogs or cats? And comfortable? ‘Cause we’re gonna be walking around for a bit so I wanna be able to move around freely.”

Roman nodded. Cute and comfortable. He could work with that.

Then he thought of something. “What about your skirt outfit from the photoshoot? It’s cute, and it seems comfortable enough.”

Patton looked up at an indiscriminate point, pursing his mouth in thought, trying to remember what he looked like when he was wearing it. “Well, yeah…but everyone’s already seen me in it.”

“Ah. You wanna wear something new?”

Patton nodded.

Roman returned the nod and turned back to his closet. His brow furrowed further and he bit his upper lip as he looked through his wardrobe one last time. Then he stopped, grinned and pulled out one more dress.

“How about this?”

Patton looked up, and he paused, mouth falling slightly open. Roman was holding up a pretty apple-red sleeveless dress covered in a white butterfly print. It had a boat neckline and a knee-length skirt that was perfect for swishing around.

“It’s so pretty!” Patton breathed. Then he faltered. “Just, it’s a little…bright, for me. Otherwise, it’d be – ”

Roman snapped his fingers.

“ …Perfect.”

Roman’s grin widened. Date outfit: check.

After laying the dress down carefully on his bed for later, Roman snapped the dresses off the floor and back into his closet, made his way to his vanity and picked up his makeup kit. Then he bounded back to where Patton was sitting and sat down beside him, already emptying the contents of his kit onto the bedspread.

“Do you have a makeup look in mind?” he asked, fingers skittering past blush compacts and mascara tubes.

Patton gave a small start. “Oh! Um…I actually didn’t really think about doing anything like that.”

Roman stopped and looked up. “Do you not want to?”

“Oh, no, no! I do! I was just caught off guard!”

Roman’s brow furrowed and he shook his head. “Patton, I will only do it if you really want to.”

Patton mashed his lips together and looked down for a moment, conflicted.

“…I do. Just…nothing too over-the-top, if that’s okay. Not that I think that you’d do that! Just – well – you know – ”

Roman placed a hand on Patton’s arm, making the dad trait stop. “It’s okay, Padre.”

Patton deflated a bit before nodding and looking down. Roman’s face twisted a bit at that, but he said nothing and gave Patton a comforting pat before retracting his hand and going back to rummaging through his makeup collection.

“Don’t you worry, Pat! I already have the perfect makeup look in mind for you!”

Patton nodded, though a teeny tiny part of him couldn’t help but be a bit apprehensive at what Roman had planned. Roman’s style was more extravagant than the other Sides, but…he was still better at makeup than Patton. So, Patton decided to keep trusting him.

Silence fell over them as Roman continued to look through his makeup collection and set aside those which he thought would work well for Patton’s makeup look, the only sound in the room being that of Roman’s clock ticking.

Soon, Roman found everything he’d wanted. Pleased, he turned back to Patton, and he stopped, smile faltering. Patton was looking off into space with an unsmiling, unfocused look in his eyes. Roman waved his hand in front of Patton’s face.

“Patton? Patton!”

Patton jumped and looked up, startled out of his thoughts. Roman looked at him with mixed concern and confusion.

“Everything okay, Padre?”

Patton pasted on a smile and nodded. “Yeah! All hunky-dory, kiddo! Nothin’ to worry about!”

Roman’s brow furrowed. “You know…if something’s bothering you, you know you can always come talk to one of us, right?”

Patton’s smile vanished, and he broke eye contact and heaved a small sigh. “Yeah…I know.”

Roman paused for a moment before reaching out and placing his hand on Patton’s arm, not saying anything, waiting for Patton to come forth.

Patton looked down at the hand on his arm. “I…honestly thought I’d never have this again.”

Roman cocked his head to one side. “Have what?”

Patton looked up at him, and Roman saw a sliver of sadness slide over the paternal Side’s face.

“Like…how we’re talking again and hanging out together like we used to. Before everything that happened. Before…everything I did. Or said. And…everything I didn’t do.”

Roman’s heart pricked and his face winced. He knew what Patton was alluding to. He put on what he hoped was a reassuring smile. “It’s okay, Patton. Really. I mean, yeah, things were icky before, but we’re in a better place now.”

Patton nodded, but he didn’t look any more reassured by Roman’s words. He only looked more guilty and ashamed. Roman’s smile fell away and he heaved a small sigh before moving closer and wrapping an arm around Patton’s shoulders. Patton let out a breath himself and laid his head on Roman’s shoulder, and Roman rested his head on top of Patton’s. They stayed in that close position for a moment, just taking in the quietness of the moment and each other’s company.

“I still can’t help feeling guilty, sometimes.”

“I know.”

“I mean, like, I don’t purposefully remember, but every so often something will remind me of ‘that time’ and then it all comes back to me and just…I end up feeling bad all over again.”

Roman rubbed Patton’s shoulder comfortingly. “We worked through that, though. We all did. And Logan did say that there’s no problem remembering the past, so long as we keep moving forward and let go of regret.”

Patton let out a weak chuckle. “Yeah. Logan really is smart.”

Roman chuckled back. “He sure is.”

A small smile lingered on Patton’s face at the thought of Logan, which relieved Roman a little. That relief was short-lived, however, when that same smile disappeared as fast as it appeared.

“I still wonder if I’m good enough for him. Or just…enough, period.”

Roman’s heart sank at these words and he removed his arm around Patton to take Patton’s hands in his and make him look him in the eye. “You are.”

Patton blinked and opened his mouth to say something, but the look on Roman’s face told him that he wasn’t done talking, so he closed it again and waited, letting Roman have his turn.

Roman rubbed gentle circles into the back of Patton’s hands, feeling a sense of déjà vu of what he was about to do. “You are enough. And you don’t need to change yourself for anything. Logan adores you. For all that you are. I’ve seen how he’s like around you, and he’s never been better. And I’ve seen it in you, too. So, you have nothing to worry about. You’re doing fine.”

Patton’s heart wobbled in his chest at this. It was just so much: how they were talking it out, talking about ‘it’, and Roman was being so reassuring and calm. He wasn’t sure if he knew or not, but Patton felt like he and Logan weren’t the only ones who’d come a long way. It had been a long road for Roman, but he’d come out the other side even stronger than before. The growth he’d gone through, and the maturity he’d developed and now displayed like a silent badge of courage, even if Roman wasn’t aware of it himself, it was a proud moment for Patton, and awe-inspiring, too.

Fortunately, Patton was able to stop himself from breaking down. He nodded his head quietly, looking down at his lap. “That’s why I want to make this date extra-special for Logan. Because he’s wonderful and has done so much for me, and it’s my chance to do something back for him.”

Roman's eyes softened a touch, and he squeezed Patton’s hands comfortingly. "It’s gonna go great, Padre. You’ll see."

Patton lifted shiny eyes at that, and he looked at the creative trait for a moment before giving him a watery smile. "Thank you," he whispered gratefully.

Roman beamed and he pulled the moral Side in for an extra-long hug for added reassurance, Patton clinging back. They lingered in the hug for a while before breaking apart.

"Now, then! Let's get cracking! You've a date to get ready for!"

*******

Meanwhile, a hop and a skip to the other side of the Mindscape, Virgil was sitting on Logan’s bed looking up at the logical trait with an uncertain expression.

“Remind me why I’m here again?” he asked.

Logan pushed his glasses up his nose and brought his hands behind his back. “I have a date with Patton.”

Virgil raised an eyebrow. “Yeah, I know that. But why do you need me here?”

Logan shifted slightly on his feet, suddenly a little sheepish, which caught Virgil off guard a bit since Logan was never one to be unconfident or at a loss for words.

“I…require some help on my attire,” Logan finally admitted quietly. “I want to make sure that I look acceptable for Patton, and out of all of us I’ve always considered you as possessing the highest level of competency with wardrobe.”

It was true. When Virgil had revealed his new outfit following his acceptance, Logan had been honestly impressed with the level of thought and care Virgil had put into its design and his chosen colour scheme.

Virgil blinked briefly before turning away slightly and coughing, cheeks reddening a little. He was unused to praise, even though he’d been with the Light Sides for ages now.

Seeing Virgil’s reaction, Logan furrowed his brow. “Did I make you uncomfortable? I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be so forward like that.”

“No, no. You’re good, Lo. Just…y’know, I’m not used to hearing that kinda stuff.”

Logan cocked his head. “Hearing what?”

Virgil flapped a hand haphazardly, avoiding eye contact. “Just, like, hearing…I dunno…compliments? I guess? Like, from any of you. I’m not used to it.”

Logan’s eyes widened slightly at this before softening. He swallowed before speaking again. “I see. I take it that it wasn’t really commonplace on the ‘Other Side’?”

Virgil gave a non-committal shrug, but the tightening of his lips and furrowing of his brow spoke otherwise.

At this, Logan’s face creased slightly and he said, in a soft, reassuring voice: “I did mean what I said, Virgil. You know very well that I wouldn’t say anything just for the sake of saying it.”

This was true. Logan said what he meant, and meant what he said. So, he wouldn’t say what he’d just said just to be nice. Virgil nodded then changed the subject so that they weren’t focused on him anymore.

“Anyways, you wanted me to help you pick out an outfit?”

Rolling with the subject change, Logan nodded. “Yes. I’ve already devised an outfit, but I wanted your honest, keen opinion on it.”

Virgil looked at Logan with uncertainty. “You sure, Lo?”

Logan nodded.

Virgil let out a breath and waved a hand towards the rational Side. “All right. Show me.”

Logan nodded again before taking a brief, deep breath. Then he snapped his fingers.

A beat of silence followed.

Then Virgil raised an incredulous eyebrow at Logan.

“Really? This is what you were planning on wearing for your date?” he deadpanned.

Logan furrowed his brow. “It’s different from what I usually wear, is it not?”

“Logan, you’re wearing the exact same thing. Except your tie’s colours are now inverted.”

“Yes…and?”

Virgil let out an exasperated sigh and pinched his nasal bridge. “Listen, buddy, it’s a date. Ya gotta put in more effort. Otherwise, Pat’s gonna think you don’t really care.”

Logan’s eyes widened slightly. “But – I do care. That’s why I thought to switch the tie’s colours around so they differed slightly from the norm.”

“Wait. Hold on. That’s not – ugh!”

After groaning, Virgil jumped up from the bed and strode towards Logan, taking him by the shoulders and steering him around and pushing him downwards so that he was the one sitting on the bed now. “Let’s see what else you’ve got in here.” He turned back to the chest of drawers and opened a drawer.

The anxious trait blinked. All he saw was neatly folded piles of black shirts and jeans. He opened another drawer. The same sight greeted him. Upon opening the rest of the drawers and getting the same result, Virgil turned back towards Logan, bewildered.

“You really don’t have a lotta variety, do ya?”

Logan fiddled with his glasses uncomfortably. “Thomas based all of us on figures in his life that left an impact on him in some way. With me, it was his teachers at school who cultivated his drive for knowledge. It just so happened that the clothes I wear were the clothes they wore, so as I grew into my role, I ended up taking on the appearance as such. It’s all I’ve known since Thomas’ school days.”

That…Virgil could actually understand, a bit. Since he was based off of Thomas’ ‘emo’ phase during his adolescence, anything that wasn’t comfortable nor shape-concealing was deemed out of his comfort zone. It was all he’d ever known. So, he couldn’t fault Logan too much for sticking with something that worked once he’d found it.

Still…

“But, like, didn’t you have other outfits when Thomas was little?”

Logan made a face, but nodded all the same. “We all did. But our conjuring abilities weren’t as developed during Thomas’ childhood, so we all drew inspiration from wherever we could. Though, for me, it came from books and television that Thomas consumed. And back then they generally portrayed characters who were academically inclined in an…exaggerated manner.”

“So, nerd stuff like suspenders, big glasses and bow ties?”

Logan’s grimace deepened. “Yes.”

Virgil made a face back at that. “Yeah, probably shouldn’t go with that. Roman looked like a Young Sheldon reject in that get-up he wore for the jam commercial.”

Logan let out a snicker at that and Virgil joined in with a brief chuckle before sobering up and refocusing on the task at hand. He looked around Logan’s room before his eyes fell on Logan’s closet. He walked towards it and opened it.

Inside was a mish-mosh of clothes that were more varied than those in Logan’s chest of drawers, from the Sherlock cosplay to his holiday winter sweaters. Virgil’s eyes roamed over the eclectic selection before something caught his eye. He reached out and pulled it out. It was Logan’s skirt outfit from the ‘Sanders Sides Skirt Series’ from months ago. He turned back towards Logan, gesturing to it with his head.

“What about this? You haven’t worn it since your photoshoot with Thomas, right? It’s probably nice enough for something like a date.”

Logan pursed his lips slightly.

“Not too keen on it?”

“It’s not that. It’s just…“ Logan let out a breath. “It is nice, I’ll grant you that, especially considering that I picked it out myself while scouring the Internet with Thomas. And I haven’t had another opportunity to wear it again since the photoshoot so it could work. Just…the pencil skirt wouldn’t be conducive to my plan of walking through the Imagination with Patton. Neither would the shoes I wore, too.”

Again, Virgil could get that. He could see how much thought Logan had put into every aspect of the upcoming date. He clearly really wanted everything to go well. Which was sweet…so long as he was aware that there was always the potential for something to go awry. But Virgil knew better than to voice that at the moment when Logan was being open and vulnerable with him.

He took in the outfit then turned back towards Logan, burnt umber eyes raking over the teacher with a thoughtful look. The jagged bolts of amethyst in his irises seemed to burn like the dying embers of a mystical, fantastical campfire.

Logan shifted slightly, a little uncomfortable under the scrutiny. “What?”

Virgil stayed quiet for a moment before speaking. “You said that you think I have a good handle on fashion, right?”

Logan blinked at him but nodded. “Yes, I did. It wasn’t an empty statement.”

Virgil nodded, cheeks flushing mildly again before getting a hold of himself by taking a breath. “I have an idea. But…before I do anything, I wanna make sure you actually trust me, okay?”

Logan looked at Virgil for a moment before nodding firmly. “I do.”

Virgil nodded a final time before motioning for Logan to stand up. Logan complied, nerves taut with anticipation of what Virgil had in mind. The vigilant Side approached his calm counterpart until they were face to face but with a respectable distance between them so that Logan was at ease.

“Okay. First, I want you to close your eyes.”

Logan did a mild double-take at that. “What? Why?”

Virgil huffed. “You said you trust me, right?”

“I do, but…why do you want me to close my eyes?”

Virgil rolled his own but replied: “So that it’ll be a surprise.”

Logan wasn’t one for surprises, but he was still willing to place his trust in Virgil’s fashion expertise, and he didn’t want to hurt his feelings by being distrustful. Their amiable companionship had come a long way since the early days of Virgil’s appearance in the Light Side of the Mindscape, and he didn’t want to do anything to make it go sour. So, Logan closed his eyes and kept still, waiting for Virgil to enact his plan.

Virgil mashed his lips together and swallowed as he gathered his concentration. Then, once he was ready, he snapped his fingers.

Logan started a little as he felt his whole form shift from his head to his toes, but kept still so as not to throw anything off. Then he heard Virgil say: “I’m gonna guide you to your mirror. Keep your eyes closed.” Once Logan nodded his affirmation and consent, he felt Virgil’s hands settle around his upper arms and himself be moved in some direction. He disliked the brief loss of control, but he knew still to keep trusting Virgil.

He felt himself come to a stop, and heard Virgil say: “Okay. You can open your eyes, now”

He heard the waver in Virgil’s voice, and the tension in his muscles prickled. Was something wrong? Why did Virgil sound unsure?

Then Logan opened his eyes, and he gaped at his reflection.

He was dressed in an interesting combination of clothes from different outfits he had worn, plus others he’d never seen before. His standard shirt and tie were gone; in their place was the matching dark blue brocade vest-and-tie ensemble from his skirt debut over the black long-sleeved button-down shirt he wore during the Sides’ court showdown with Janus with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. His jeans had stayed, though now they were black like Virgil’s. The biggest, most stark change was his shoes; his dress shoes had been replaced with galaxy-printed Converse sneakers. The cat-eye glasses from his photoshoot completed the look.

He didn’t look like himself. It was different.

But…he looked good.

Virgil – who was already tense when he’d changed Logan’s clothes and maneuvered him to the mirror – hunched his shoulders even more self-consciously with Logan’s continued silence.

“If you hate it, I’m really sorry. I’ll change it to something different. I thought it would work ‘cause it’s, like, formal, like you like it, but it also makes you look good. Was that weird? Is it the shoes? It’s the shoes, isn’t it? God, I’m sorry! I really don’t know what I’m doing. I should just – ”

Virgil’s ramble came to a halt when Logan placed a calming hand on his upper arm. The anxious trait took a couple of breaths before looking at Logan.

The logical Side had a rare smile on his face, and he gave Virgil’s arm a couple of comforting pats.

“This is just right, Virgil. Thank you.”

Virgil flushed a bit from the praise and he turned his head away for a moment before looking back up at Logan with a lopsided smile. Logan smiled back at him.

“Well, isn’t this just sweet?”

Both Virgil and Logan jumped and looked around them for the source of the voice.

“Yep. It’s almost sweet enough to make me wanna puke my guts out.”

Both left-brained Sides looked in time to see Remus – sitting on top of Logan’s chest of drawers, when he hadn’t been before – throw his head over the side and start puking his guts out.

Literally.

In graphic, overly exaggerated fashion.

Virgil flinched and looked away, trying to block out the horrific sounds of squelching and retching. Logan watched Remus’ spew fest with unflappable disinterest.

The vomiting continued for a minute.

Then two.

Then three.

Then –

“Are you done yet?” Logan deadpanned, his tone etched with the slightest trace of irritation.

Remus, while still throwing up, held up a finger to indicate ‘not yet’. After coughing up both kidneys and his gallbladder, Remus sat up, shifted himself so that he was sitting as though on a chaise longue and propped his head on a hand. “All done!”

Virgil went through a full-body shiver then – while pointedly ignoring the sizable pile of internal organs sitting placidly next to the chest of drawers – leveled the intrusive Side with a glare. “What do you want, trash rat?”

Remus pressed a hand to his chest as though offended, a faux offended look on his face. “Why, emo! Is that any way to say hello to a friend?”

“More like constant annoyance,” Virgil retorted. But Remus, as always, didn’t take offense to that. He thrived on chaos and dissonance, after all.

Logan lightly placed a hand on Virgil’s arm as a silent form of communication to not take it too far. He looked up at Remus coolly. “Is there a particular reason for your presence, or did you show up just to be a nuisance?”

“Oh, you know me! I like showin’ up when I’m not wanted!”

Then Remus peered down to look at Logan more closely.

“My, you clean up nicely, Logan! A lil’ predictable considering what you like, but damn!”

A faint flush peeked out of Logan’s cheeks but he kept a straight face. “I don’t know if that’s your form of a compliment, Remus, but…thank you, I guess.”

“Of course, it’s a compliment, you dork! I could just eat you out right now!”

Logan’s brow furrowed in puzzlement. “I thought the expression was ‘eat you up’?”

“Nope!” Remus chirped, popping the ‘p’ sharply. “I meant, eat you out! As in eating as-“

“OKAY!” Virgil shouted, now crimson. “No need to finish that sentence!”

Remus tutted and slipped a hand into his pocket. He pulled out a white round container, screwed the top off and dipped his fingers into the contents inside before smearing it all over his face like a face cream.

“You are way too tense, Virgin! You should relax! Like what I’m doing right now!” He held out the container. “Facial?”

Even from their respectable distance away, both Virgil and Logan could see that the white substance inside the container was way too thick and viscous to be a face mask, not to mention the sharp, pungent scent accompanying it. They wrinkled their noses and chorused their refusal in perfect unison. “No thanks.” Remus shrugged and continued his impromptu self-care routine.

Virgil let out an annoyed growl. “Would you mind shoving off? We’re in the middle of something.”

Remus looked back at them. “Oh? Would that ‘something’ happen to involve Nerdy Wolverine’s date with Sugar Daddy?”

Logan and Virgil stopped and stared up at Remus, their irritation evaporating on the spot.

“You…know about my date with Patton?” said Logan.

Remus rolled his eyes. “Who doesn’t? It’s all Patty-Cakes has been talking about for a week! At least, that’s what Janny told me, since he talks to him more than I do.”

Virgil’s lips tightened at the mention of Janus, but he bit his tongue this time. He was still tense around the snake, and he still had a tendency to lash out in small, passive-aggressive ways. But after the ‘big talk’ all of them had from ages ago, he really was trying better to at least tolerate Janus’ presence even at his discomfort. Mostly for Thomas, but also a bit for Patton, seeing as he still felt a bit bad for the way he’d treated him after the wedding. If Patton really didn’t have a problem with Janus, then he would try himself too, though old habits die hard.

Logan’s flush deepened at the mention of Patton, and his eyes softened a smidge, but his neutral expression remained uncracked. He adjusted his glasses and said: “Anyways, as Virgil said, I’m in the middle of preparing for my excursion, so your presence would be greatly appreciated if it turned scarce.”

Remus hummed at this and licked some of the white stuff off of his fingers, relishing in the looks of disgust he got out of the left-brained Sides. It was clear that he wasn’t planning on leaving any time soon. Virgil growled again.

“Let’s just ignore him, Logan. We still need to finish up.”

“Indeed.”

But they didn’t move very far before Remus spoke up again.

“Oh! I’d be worried if I were you!”

Logan turned back at this, intrigued and a little concerned. “About what?”

“Your date with Patty!”

Logan frowned slightly. “Why should I be worried?”

“Oh, you know, anything could go wrong! You two could get lost in the forest! Or you could get eaten by a bear! Or he could get eaten by a bear! Or –”

“HEY! LEAVE OFF. That’s MY thing,” Virgil snapped, his Tempest Tongue tempering down in a serrated decrescendo towards the end.

Remus tilted his head to the side, fluttering his eyelashes at the vigilant trait. “Oh? Really? You don’t say?” he said in what was supposed to be a sweet tone but was actually not that sweet. Virgil clenched his teeth and fists in unison. Sensing the tension, Logan swooped in once more to diffuse it, resting his hand again on Virgil’s arm. Virgil was still tense and pissed but kept himself in check.

Logan looked once more at Remus, a hard, stern look in his eyes. “Try as you might, Remus, you can’t get to me. I have full confidence in my outdoor excursion with Patton, and nothing you say can convince me otherwise.”

Remus perked up at this, beaming all of a sudden. “Perfect! Then I guess the only one who needs to be worried is Patty himself!”

Logan frowned. “Patton? Why Patton?”

Remus grinned, sharp teeth on display. “ ‘Cause he’s standing in front of the door to the Imagination with Ro-Bro right now! And he’s been waiting for almost fifteen minutes!”

Logan froze at these words, and whipped his head around to look at his clock.

The colour from his face drained instantaneously.

Then – faster than an inexperienced student who’d managed to light themselves on fire with a Bunsen burner – he bolted from his room without another word.

Virgil gaped after him, then turned back to Remus. The chaotic figment smiled sweetly at him and winked at him saucily while sucking on his fingers obscenely. Virgil blushed and rushed out after Logan, flipping Remus off as he left. Remus shrugged and continued his spa routine.

*******

Logan rushed down the corridor to the door to the Imagination, heart pounding with panic. How did he lose track of the time? He was usually so conscientious. Oh God, he hoped Patton wouldn’t be mad at him, though he wouldn’t blame him if he did. He also inwardly cursed Remus for distracting him. That was probably the main reason why he popped up in his room. Just causing his usual chaos. Only this could potentially sour his relationship with Patton, a thought which pricked Logan’s chest uncomfortably but was immediately pushed away by the main thought of ‘MOVE YOUR ASS’.

Soon the door came into sight, along with two amorphous blobs of red and light blue whom Logan knew to be Patton and Roman. He skidded to a halt and bent over to catch his breath, lamenting how his brief burst of physical activity must have affected his appearance.

“Patton – I’m sorry – I wasn’t – I didn’t –”

But then, in his out-of-breath state, Logan looked up, and he stopped, gobsmacked.

Standing before him was his sweetheart, and all he could think was…’Wow’.

Patton was a wonder in frost and winter-cloud, with cheeks glowing like the rising sun. He was wearing a pale blue dress covered with a white butterfly print. The skirt cut just above his knees, allowing him to show off his calves. A grey cashmere sweater was tied around his waist in place of his cat hoodie, and nude ballet flats replaced his usual sneakers. He had gone with a simple jewelry set consisting of a light blue rhinestone butterfly necklace and matching dangling earrings. The butterfly motif ended with a papery-thin, decorative butterfly clip clipping back his bangs.

The full look was completed with what Virgil – who’d shown up behind Logan and was also admiring Patton’s look – could define as ‘throwback 90’s’, which was: white eyeshadow, black eyeliner on the bottom eyelid only, black mascara on top lashes only, a sheer pink lip tint and glitter all over his cheeks. But…it was done tastefully, and, somehow, they managed to make Patton’s eyes look even more voluminous and bright, able to see the light within. Best of all, the glitter made the freckles on Patton’s face stand out even more. It all came together really well and was the most striking aspect of Patton’s appearance.

In short, Patton looked – objectively – adorable. And, in a word, Logan was enchanted.

Meanwhile, Patton felt faint at the sight before him. Logan was a vision in sapphire and ebony, steady and certain as the dusk that followed the twilight. His brocade vest and the black button-down really helped to set off his broad shoulders, while the rolled-up sleeves did a good job of showing off Logan’s forearms. The cat-eyes both contrasted well with his sharp features and face shape and made them less severe. The galaxy sneakers took him a little by surprise but he felt like they actually went well with what Logan was wearing. And his brief sprint had fluffed up his hair, brightened his eyes and left a dewy flush in his cheeks. There was no question: Patton’s heart was almost about to fly out of his chest.

Logan was still panting slightly and gaping at the sight before him before being shaken out of his lovestruck stupor by Roman clicking his tongue and raising an eyebrow at him. “Got caught up with work stuff or something, Teach?”

Logan shook his composure back into place and managed to say somewhat evenly to Patton:

“I…you look wonderful.”

Patton beamed. “Thanks! So do you!” Then his eyes widened as he remembered something. “Oh! And you know what’s even better?”

“What?”

Patton’s grin widened, and he slipped his hands into two slits in the sides of his dress. Then he leaned forward and said in a conspiratorial-like whisper:

“It has pockets!”

Logan smiled in appreciation. Pockets were always a good thing to have.

Then it occurred to him that he didn’t have a gift to give to Patton, and his smile fell a little.

Just then, the teacher felt something materialize in the hand that he was holding behind his back, and he just managed to stop himself from flinching in surprise. He surreptitiously looked out the corner of his eye to see that it was a bouquet of flowers. He looked back in time to catch Roman smirking at him from behind Patton, his fingers fluttering amidst a fading mist of red and gold sparks.

Logan swallowed and revealed the flowers from behind him, holding them out to Patton almost shyly. “F-For you,” he said, a little stiltedly.

Patton let out a small gasp and clasped his hands close to his chest. He looked up at Logan, and Logan was alarmed to see tears in Patton’s eyes. Did he do something wrong? Were the flowers not the right kind of gift to give?

Then he looked down and took a better look at the flowers.

White carnations and blue forget-me-nots.

His eyes widened in realization.

A pure and true love. May it remain everlasting and faithful.

Logan remembered the flower language associated with both plants from the time he’d studied the topic all those months ago when he was first trying to repair ties with Patton. It was hard to believe that all of that had brought him to this point. Suffice to say that they were very apt descriptors for his relationship with Patton. Now he understood that Patton’s tears were not because he was sad or hurt, but because he understood and was touched by the message.

Logan looked up microscopically to make eye contact with Roman. The princely figment had a gentle smile on his face and gave a tiny nod. Logan then thought that the choice in flowers was also an unspoken message of well wishes on Roman’s part, not just a display of his own knowledge on flower language like he and Patton. He felt a rush of warm affection for the creative trait and hoped that his silent look of gratitude was communicated fluently.

He felt the flowers leave his hands and Logan looked back down in time to see Patton taking the bouquet from him. Patton cradled the bouquet against his chest, gazing down on it like it was the most precious thing in the world. Then he looked back up at Logan, and his face held an expression of such intense yet tender adoration that Logan felt pinned in place like a butterfly from Patton’s dress on a corkboard.

The sweet moment between them was broken when Roman clapped his hands and cheered:

“All right! No more standin’ around! It’s date time!”

Logan and Patton looked back at Roman with equal parts fondness and exasperation (but only a little for that last one; they couldn’t bring themselves to be too annoyed at Roman, not with how excited and nervous they were).

Then Patton looked down at his bouquet and held out to Roman. “Do you think you could – ” he started saying, before the bouquet disappeared into thin air.

He jumped in surprise and looked at his empty hands before looking back at Roman, who was smiling at him. “Already in your room and in a vase, waiting for your return,” Roman reassured him.

Patton smiled at Roman in gratitude, then he turned back towards Logan, his eyes sparkling. “You ready?”

Logan gave a smile. “Always.”

Patton beamed and held out a hand, which Logan gladly took.

Roman beamed and unlocked the door to the Imagination with a wave of his hand. “Have fun!”

Virgil, leaning against a wall and watching them, waved them off. “Be safe.”

Logan and Patton smiled in gratitude and reassurance to the anxious Side and started making their way into the Imagination.

Once they’d fully entered and the door started closing behind them, Roman called out: “Make sure to look for the red rose bush at the entrance to the woods when you wanna come back! Enjoy!”

And with that, the door clicked shut behind them.

Virgil let out a breath and slipped his hands into his pockets.

“Well, that’s that. Hope things’ll go fine for them,” he said quietly.

Roman rolled his eyes and slung an arm around Virgil’s shoulders. “They’ll be fine, emo. I’m certain they’ll have a date they’ll never forget.”

Virgil nodded in agreement, then looked at Roman. “By the way, did you manage to solve your problem?”

Roman furrowed his brow. “Problem?”

Virgil rolled his eyes. “Y’know, the whole thing with Logan and Patton?”

Roman’s eyes widened. “Ah! That! Yeah, yeah, I did!”

Virgil waited. But Roman didn’t say anything after that. He raised an eyebrow.

“Well? How did you do it?”

Roman shrugged half a shoulder airily. “Oh, you know. A lil’ of this, a lil’ of that...”

Virgil side-eyed the romantic trait warily. He didn’t like how cryptic that sounded.

“Roman…what did you do?”

Roman just smiled. Boy, were Patton and Logan in for a real surprise.

*******

On the other side, after watching the door dematerialize behind them, Patton and Logan turned to look at each other before smiling, both giddy with excitement about the date and enamoured with the sight of each other.

Then they turned around and –

They stopped dead in their tracks.

They blinked.

Then they looked at each other.

Then they turned around again and blinked once more.

What they saw before them was…not what either of them had been expecting.

They were standing at the entrance of a large wood, with tall trees looming over them on either side. The red rose bush Roman had mentioned was sitting on their left, as expected. This whole set-up wasn’t unusual.

What was, was…well, it was a bit difficult for them to put into words.

Logan had anticipated a picture-perfect summer’s day: blue sky, white cumulus clouds, a lush wood filled with friendly fauna which would lead to bucolic rolling hills of green and flora, with a perfect temperature in the 70s range (or, again, in the 20s since he had no preference for one system over the system and had studied both Metric and Imperial enough to be well-versed). The ideal setting for a picnic.

Patton had expected a peaceful summer evening: just a simple forest for them to walk through while it was still light out, with the sky all painted with pretty colours like orange and pink to start with. Then once they reached a wide, open clearing at the end, the warm colours would fade to cool ones like blue and purple in time to welcome the expanse of stars dotting the sky above, with a breeze that was cool but not too cool. The perfect way to enjoy stargazing.

What they got…was an amalgamation of both.

It was as if the whole world around them had been divided, split evenly at its center, into two different lands: one bathed in sunlight, and the other shrouded in moonlight. A split screen between day and night come to life. For Patton, it reminded him of that Pixar short with the two humanoid blobs – one personifying Day and the other personifying Night. Somehow – unbeknownst to each other – Roman had managed to literally fulfill both of their requests at the same time. It was both jarring and strangely beautiful at the same time.

Both Sides were beyond confused. What had happened? Why was it like this? Did something go wrong when Roman tried to fulfill their request? Should they go back or try to contact Roman in some way to inquire about the layout? Was it safe?

But the door was already gone, and it wouldn’t pop up again until they were ready to leave. They’d barely started the date! They figured that it was no use worrying about it, for now. It was the Imagination, after all; even though Roman and Remus could control it, it could still be unpredictable and flighty at times. It was in its nature. So, they decided to roll with it.

Patton looked around again. “So…which direction should we go?”

Logan looked around himself, then bit his lower lip. “I…admittedly do not know.”

Just then, something flickered in their peripheral vision and they turned around in time to see twin rows of white bioluminescent mushrooms light up along a long pathway they hadn’t noticed before.

“What the?” Patton commented.

“I suppose this is Roman’s way of making sure we don’t get lost on our way to…well, wherever we’re going, I guess,” Logan replied.

Patton nodded, nibbling on his lip a bit. He hoped that the clearing was actually going to be there. He didn’t know what he would do if it wasn’t.

“What mushrooms are these?” he said to distract himself from that worry for the time being. “I don’t think I recognize them from anything in real life.”

Logan hummed in thought and walked closer to them, gently tugging Patton along. He bent down slightly and peered at one of them, trying to get a better look. After a moment or so, he sighed and shook his head.

“I cannot identify them, unfortunately. Knowing Roman, they’re probably an amalgamation of any mushroom Thomas has seen in his life, or maybe they’re a whole new creation altogether.”

Patton nodded at this. “True. We are in the Imagination.”

Logan nodded at this and looked back down the pathway. The end of it was too far off for him to see what was there, but he hoped the hill where their picnic was supposed to take place would be there. Otherwise, his surprise for Patton would be all for naught. Well, there was no use worrying about it for the time being. They would cross that bridge when they came to it (although, from his peripheral vision, he was pretty certain there was no actual bridge for them to traverse).

Logan turned back to his loved one and gave him a smile, then nodded his head in the direction of the path ahead of them. “Shall we?”

Patton smiled back at his sweetie and nodded, giving his hand a squeeze. Logan felt his heart skip a beat at that.

The two lovers started following the path towards whatever destination they were going in, illuminated by the mushrooms lining the pathway. They took their time – after all, there was no hurry when it was just the two of them – and they took in their surroundings, never breaking the link between them. Even though it was a little unnerving to be traversing the Imagination in such a juxtaposed state, both had to admit that seeing how different the Imagination looked in both settings was oddly beautiful, in a way. To observe how the trees began by being lit up in shades of shiny gold and chartreuse before turning into deep greys and silvers. To have sunlight filtering through the canopy on one side and moonlight peeking through on the other. To hear birds singing in one ear and crickets chirping in the other. It really was something to experience.

And, as an added bonus, it allowed them to admire each other in secret.

As though by natural design, Logan found himself walking in the shaded section of the Imagination, which left Patton walking in the lit side. They’d done it without even thinking about it; it’d just felt right to do so. And as Patton looked all around him and cooed at all the fauna and flora to his heart’s content, Logan admired his darling in all his effervescent glory.

The sunlight fell softly on Patton, leaving him framed in a golden aura reminiscent of the holy figures Thomas read about in his early Catholic upbringing. His butterfly jewelry left speckles of light briefly on nearby objects. The butterfly clip in his waves seemed to dance with merriment. And the glitter on his cheeks shimmered even more, like traces of fairy dust, even Logan wasn’t really in the habit of using such fantastical, flowery language and metaphors.

In truth, Patton was wondrously, gloriously, inebriatingly magnified, and Logan felt like he would never get enough of just looking at him.

Granted, Patton’s beauty – both outer and inner – made Logan feel a bit inadequate, even if he never admitted it out loud. How could he ever keep up with him?

Then Logan shook his head firmly. No. None of that. Patton had told him: you are enough. And though he wasn’t Janus, he could tell that Patton was telling the truth. So, he pushed the thoughts away and allowed himself to sink into the belief that he was enough for Patton, and that was okay.

Then something caught his eye and Logan turned to see bats flitting about on his side, starting their evening search for food. He watched them with a slight smile, facts that he’d memorized about these nocturnal creatures flitting through his head as he observed.

At this point, Patton turned his head and took in the sight of Logan, the moonlight falling on him like a gossamer curtain. Logan came across like an ethereal woodland ruler, the epitome of calm and steadiness. Which was ironic considering his penchant for disliking anything not rooted in reality, which was why he still clashed with Roman on occasion. Just…the way the glow of the moon highlighted his cheekbones and shoulders even more. How the vest defined his waist. The galaxy sneakers seeming to twinkle like their real-life counterpart as he walked. And his forearms…oh boy. Logan just looked and was perfect to Patton.

Okay, well, maybe not perfect. Yes, Logan had his moments of temper and stubbornness, and he still tended to get so focused on his work that his self-care suffered (and Patton or Janus had to step in), but in general the logical Side was unflappable, able to get through anything with steely nerve and steadfast standing. Patton wished that he could be more like him. Less energetic, less extroverted, more collected, more careful.

But he knew that Logan wouldn’t want that of him. He loved Patton as is, and would be devastated if he changed any part of him. Patton could take a few lessons from Logan, yes; allow himself to be influenced, but never lose the core of who he was as a Side. He could do that.

Soon the path started narrowing, and Patton and Logan came to a curtain of leaves that clearly led somewhere. They looked at each other for a moment, then each pulled a curtain back. They gaped at the sight before them.

A large, wide clearing stretched out as far as they could see, with the woods framing its sides all around, and in the middle of the clearing was a medium-sized hill with a somewhat flattened top. Above them, the sky expanded out into infinity, and its appearance was most awe-inspiring to behold. It was still evenly divided by the dichotomic light filters, but without the canopy in the way, Logan and Patton could experience the full scope of its beauty. On the light side, the sky was still bright and gay with the golden rays of the sun, Disney-esque blobs of fluffiness and its rich azure hue. On the dark side, the moon was the only source of light amongst the inky blackness of night. And right in the middle, uniting the two opposites, shades of fiery vermilion and rosy gold, royal blues and soft violets, all blended seamlessly into each other, with no muddiness or mismatches.

After taking in this lovely sight, Logan and Patton noticed something at the top of the hill. Looking at each other again, they started climbing the hill together. Fortunately, it wasn’t too steep, so at least neither of them would get too tired by the end. Once they got closer, they saw that the ‘something’ was a brown wicker basket sitting on top of a large black-and-white checked blanket.

Logan smiled. It was his picnic. Thank goodness Roman pulled through for him in the end. He gently tugged Patton towards it. Once they reached it, Logan let go of Patton and slowly sat down on the blanket. He looked up at Patton and smiled, patting the empty space beside him.

Patton complied, though he was still a little confused. “Where’d this picnic come from?”

Logan flushed. “This is…a surprise. For you.”

Patton blinked. “Me?”

Logan nodded and reached out to take Patton’s hand in his again. “I wanted to do something special for you, and I know you love picnics so…here you go.”

Patton blinked. A picnic. Logan set up a picnic. Logan didn’t like picnics very much. And yet he set one up. For him.

Logan’s confidence started to waver the longer Patton was silent. “Is it not acceptable? Maybe I could have gone with something else like –”

But Logan didn’t get to finish his sentence because Patton suddenly tackled him in a hug, nearly knocking both of them over. Logan just barely managed to keep them upright. He was also barely breathing due to how tight Patton was hugging him. Did this mean Patton liked it?

Then he felt Patton press a long, fervent kiss into his cheek before the moral Side sat back, his arms around Logan’s neck. His eyes were watery but he was grinning, and the light in his eyes was shining bright.

“I love this,” he breathed.

Logan nearly sagged with relief. Patton liked it. Patton was happy. That was all he had wanted.

“I – I’m glad to hear that,” he said shakily.

Patton grinned wider and he kissed Logan’s cheek again before letting go of him and crawling his way to the basket. Logan allowed himself a moment to get back his composure before crawling over himself to assist Patton.

They spread out their meal on the blanket. There were sandwiches (Logan was pleased to find that Roman had followed his instructions on making sure they were an equal balance of protein, carbohydrates and vitamins to ensure good nutrition and energy upkeep, though this was negated by the fact that they were cut into various shapes of both geometric and animal types for some reason, but he let it slide upon seeing the delighted look on Patton’s face), a simple salad for Logan and potato chips for Patton, lemonade and – the pièce de résistance, if Logan thought so himself – buttery thumbprint cookies with Crofter’s in the middle.

Patton immediately dove for the Tupperware containing the cookies, yanking the lid off of the container and taking one out.

“Patton, you’ll spoil your appetite if you eat dessert before the main meal.”

Patton paused and looked back at Logan, keeping steady eye contact. He brought the cookie closer to his mouth at a slow but steady pace.

“Patton…”

Patton slowly opened his mouth, cookie an inch away from consumption, still never taking his eyes off of Logan.

Logan looked back, poker face in place, unmoving and unreadable.

Patton started lowering the cookie onto his tongue.

Suddenly, Logan whipped out a hand lightning-quick and grabbed Patton’s wrist. Patton tried to pull his arm away and bring it closer to his mouth so he could still eat the cookie, but Logan kept a firm grip. Soon he and Logan were in a weird tug-of-war, impulse versus self-control. But there was no heat behind their struggles; both Sides were smirking, the ‘fight’ turning into a playful scuffle. Soon, Patton found himself on his back with Logan straddling him on top and pinning his arms down by his head, cookie still in hand but out of reach of his mouth.

Logan smirked down at his partner, a mischievous glint in his eyes. “Looks like I have the upper hand.”

Patton pouted up at him. “No fair. You cheated!”

Logan raised an eyebrow. “Oh? How so?”

“You tickled me! That’s, like, the dirtiest trick in the book!”

Logan let out a laugh at that. Then he bent down low and whispered into Patton’s ear: “All’s fair in war and love, darling.”

Patton shivered at the close proximity of Logan’s mouth to his ear, his low, deep voice sending his heart aquiver.

Then inspiration hit him, and he quickly turned his head and licked Logan’s cheek.

Logan let out a squawk and sat up slightly to wipe at his cheek with mild disgust. As Patton had hoped, Logan used the hand which had been holding down the one holding the cookie. He immediately popped the cookie into his mouth, grinning triumphantly.

Logan froze and looked down, blinking in confusion at what had happened. Then it clicked in his head what Patton had done. He glowered down at the moral Side, who just smiled back up at him innocently while still chewing the cookie. But Patton wasn’t worried. He could tell that Logan was fighting a smile by the corners of his mouth twitching so he knew he wasn’t really in trouble.

It wasn’t long before Logan gave up faux-frowning and he rolled his eyes fondly. Then he lowered himself further so he was lying on top of Patton, faces inches away from one another. He reached a hand up to cradle Patton’s face and stroked his cheek with his thumb. Patton leaned into his touch.

“You are very lucky that you’re objectively adorable,” Logan murmured.

Patton scrunched up his nose. “I know you are, but what am I?”

“Adorable.”

Patton’s flush deepened and Logan felt his heart stutter in his chest. Patton craned his neck to boop his nose against Logan’s and gave it a little nuzzle. The minute skin-to-skin contact was still enough to send sparks shooting through both of them, and their muscles went taut. Their chests were flush against each other, and Patton wondered if Logan could feel the warmth in his chest radiating out. The sweet, fruity scent of the jam on Patton’s breath wafted near Logan’s nostrils, and a surge tingled through him, much like the one he’d felt the night when he and Patton first held one another in each other’s arms. He felt the magnetic pull from before push his face closer to Patton’s, but he let it this time. Patton felt the same, and he didn’t stop it either. They were alone in the Imagination, they were on a date, and they were in a very intimate position. Why not let it happen now?

Soon their lips were scant inches away from each other, and their anticipation was palpable. Almost there –

A chittering sound jolted them out of their dream-like state. They turned their heads around in the direction of the picnic basket, just in time to lock eyes with a grey squirrel poking his head out of the basket, a cookie in its mouth.

“Hey – hey! What are you – ” Logan exclaimed, immediately clambering off Patton to chase after the squirrel, only to fall flat on his front. But the squirrel was too quick for him, scurrying out of the basket at top speed and scrambling down the hill, leaving Logan lying on the ground looking very put-out by the cookie theft.

Patton, however, was giggling up a storm; he was too amused by the situation to lament the loss of warmth, nor the squandered opportunity.

“Let ‘im go, Logan. He just wanted a little snack!”

Logan couldn’t help but pout an infinitesimal amount. “But they’re our cookies,” he grumbled.

Patton snickered again and he crawled closer to Logan and kneeled next to him. He placed a hand on Logan’s cheek, and that action made Logan look up at him. Patton smoothed out the creases at the corners of Logan’s mouth with his thumb.

“I can always bake more, honey,” he said softly.

The sour look on Logan’s face dissolved away at Patton’s gentle tone and tender gesture, and he nodded. “Alright, love.”

The look on Patton’s face then turned mischievous. “Besides, you could say the little guy is –”

“Wait, Patton, don’t –”

“– nuts for Crofter’s, too!”

Logan let out a groan that could probably raise the dead from their eternal slumber. Patton broke into peals of laughter over Logan’s reaction.

“Why are we dating again?” Logan said wryły.

Patton let the last of his giggles fade away and he bent down to place a peck on Logan’s forehead. “Because you love me.”

Logan gave him an unamused side-eye, which lasted for a fraction of a second before his face softened and he let out a sigh. “I do,” he acquiesced quietly.

A thrill rushed through Patton at this, and he just barely stopped himself from just kissing Logan point-blank right then and there. Another opportunity would come up. Besides, he was starting to get hungry.

Patton helped Logan up into a sitting position. “C’mon, let’s eat the rest of the food before the little guy decides to bring some friends over!”

Logan agreed, and they helped themselves to the rest of their picnic with no further mishaps or interruptions. Roman – as asked – had manipulated the temperature to keep it staying at 74 degrees Fahrenheit/23 degrees Celsius, so, this way, they were comfortable. The sun was still warm, though, so they were grateful for both the occasional cloud cover on the sunny side and the cool breeze they could feel wafting from the moonlit side. All in all, it was a delicious meal.

After they were done and had put away the remnants of their picnic back inside the basket, Patton sat back on his hands and gave a satisfied sigh.

“So…whatcha wanna do now?”

Logan was about to reply when something flickered in his peripheral vision overhead. He looked up in curiosity, and his eyes widened.

At this, Patton looked up just in time to see the first stars of the night sky popping into view. He grinned with delight and relief. It looked like Roman actually did come through with his promise to make Patton’s wish come true. He could get the stargazing underway.

He turned to Logan to say something, then stopped and stared at the sight he saw.

Logan’s face was aglow with awe and wonder, his mouth slightly open and the stars reflected in his eyes. For a moment, Patton saw a glimpse of the little Side once known as Curiosity. Who used to be fascinated with the world around him and everything in it. Who could study and spout facts and information about anything that interested him without pretense or self-consciousness. Who never failed to be overjoyed whenever he learned something new. Before he grew up. Before he turned serious. Before he became Logic. It wasn’t completely gone, just buried deep beneath the stress, jadedness and stringent foundation of the adult ‘Logic’ mentality. It came out every so often, especially when Logan got started on a topic he liked, but Patton wished it would come out more. Maybe it could, with a little more time and coaxing, and doing stuff like this. Just seeing Logan like this was more rewarding than he could ever know.

Patton let the moment linger for a bit longer before sliding closer to Logan and slipping his hand back into Logan’s. This seemed to jolt Logan out of his trance and looked at Patton, his face still possessing that same wonder. Patton gave him a big smile and, with a nod of his head towards the sky, whispered:

“Surprise.”

The wonder turned to confusion, and Logan looked from Patton to the sky and back again a couple times. Then the realization hit him between the eyes, and he looked back at Patton with a completely open face. He pointed a trembling finger upwards.

“That…you mean…did you…” he said hoarsely, trailing off.

Patton’s cheeks flushed and he nodded shyly. “Yeah…I had a surprise for you, too. I know how much you love stars, and how you like to talk about them, so I figured that stargazing would be a good idea and I made sure the sky was as accurate as the one in real life so…yeah.”

Logan stared. Patton had also had a surprise. He had had a surprise for him. Out of everything Patton could have chosen to do, the empathetic trait had thought about what Logan liked. And he chose stargazing. He went through all that effort. For him.

It was Patton’s turn to grow anxious as Logan’s silence stretched on. Was this the right thing? Oh, he hoped it was. He didn’t know what he would do with himself if this was a mistake. Why wasn’t Logan saying anything? Was he mad? Disappointed? What? Patton had to fight hard to keep the thoughts from snowballing, though he still found himself opening to say something – what? An apology? To explain himself? Who knew?

“Logan? Are yo–”

But this time it was Patton’s turn to be cut off as Logan wrapped an arm around his waist and raised a hand to cradle his cheek. Then Logan leaned forward and pressed a kiss into his other cheek before gently pressing their foreheads together.

“Thank you,” Patton heard a wobbly whisper. “Thank you, thank you, thank you.”

Patton felt like he could almost faint. Logan wasn’t angry. He wasn’t disappointed. He was happy. He loved the surprise. That was all Patton had wanted and hoped for, and he got it. He copied Logan by raising a hand to cradle Logan’s own cheek, and closed his eyes.

As they lingered in that tender moment, it slowly dawned on the two lovers why the Imagination was the way it was when they first entered. Both had gone to Roman and pitched their ideas to him separately, without any knowledge of each other’s plans. And, somehow, Roman was able to mash the two ideas together. That’s why the sky was showing a steady progression from day to night. That’s why there was a hilly clearing for picnicking and stargazing. That’s why both of them could do the things they wanted to do.

Patton made a mental note to make sure to bake a batch of extra-special cookies for Roman later.

Soon, they pulled back from the tender embrace and smiled at each other, and Patton figured that it was time to get the stargazing underway. He looked up and scanned the sky briefly, before spotting what he’d been looking for and grinning.

“Hey, Logan, can you tell me more about that constellation?” he asked, pointing at some indiscriminate point above him.

Logan looked up at where Patton was pointing. “Which one?”

“The…uh, the Pila- no. The Play-Doh – no. The – ugh!” Patton flushed with embarrassment. Why couldn’t he pronounce things right?

Sensing Patton’s consternation, Logan reached out to take one of Patton’s hands and gave it a reassuring squeeze. “No need to rush, darling,” he said patiently. “Can you describe it for me?”

Cheeks still flushed, Patton gave a minute nod. “Um…there’s, like, six or seven of ‘em, and they’re kinda in a clump.”

Logan’s eyes widened in realization. “Ah, the Pleiades Star Cluster?”

“Yeah! That! I, uh…don’t really know how to pronounce it. Heh, heh.”

Logan chuckled and squeezed Patton’s hand again. “No worries, love. I’d be more than happy to tell you all about it. It’s actually one of my favourite constellations.”

Patton cocked his head. “Really? How come?” He already knew that it was one of Logan’s favourite constellations, but he actually didn’t really know the reason why.

Logan’s smile turned tender, and he reached out a finger to lightly trace the faint freckles speckled across Patton’s nose. “Because they remind me of someone very dear to me.”

Patton’s eyes went wide – both from Logan’s smile and the implication of that statement – and his face went through a full flush. “Oh,” he squeaked.

Logan smiled at him fondly before sliding an arm around his waist. Patton wrapped both of his arms around Logan’s own waist and snuggled into Logan’s side. They positioned themselves so their backs were to the lit side and they were facing the night sky of the dark side. That way, they had warm sunshine caressing their backs and a cool breeze on their faces.

“So, the Pleiades, also known as the Seven Sisters, got its name from Greek mythology, specifically from the seven daughters of the Titan, Atlas, and their mother, the Oceanid Pleione…”

Before long, Logan was prattling enthusiastically about every constellation he could identify in the night sky, telling stories and facts and everything in-between. And Patton absorbed everything Logan had to tell. How could he not, when Logan looked so excited to share something that was meaningful to him and made him happy? And Patton found it all interesting, anyway, so it was a win-win.

Just then, something caught Patton’s eye and he craned his neck to look at it better.

“Hey, Logan? What’s that star? I don’t think I’ve ever seen that one before.”

Logan looked in the direction of where Patton was pointing and squinted a little, trying to see better. The star that Patton had pointed out was a pale yellow, and its glow was pulsing in regular intervals. What was unusual about it, though, was the fact that it seemed to bob up and down not unlike a toy boat in a bathtub. Logan’s brow furrowed.

“I’m…actually not sure. It doesn’t fit any description of any of the stars I’ve memorized. It certainly can’t be a Yellow Dwarf like our Sun, considering how small it is. Maybe it cou-”

Suddenly, the light winked out of existence.

Patton sat up, stunned. “Huh? Where’d it go?”

Logan was also stunned, but intrigued as well. “I…I don’t know.”

Then, it winked back on again.

Patton and Logan exchanged confused looks with each other.

Then, another yellow star flitted up from the ground, winking on and off like the first.

Then another.

And another.

And –

Logan and Patton gaped as a cloud of millions of these yellow stars floated up out of the grass and into the air. It was like a star-patterned theater curtain being pulled up into the rafters, and they were all blinking on and off in a silent symphony.

That’s when it hit Patton.

These ‘stars’ weren’t stars at all.

They were –

“Fireflies!”

Logan looked at Patton. “What?”

Patton flapped an excited hand. “They’re fireflies! Not stars!”

Logan looked back at the shimmering sight before him. Patton was right.

“Of course, Lampyridae. How did I miss it? That would explain their intermittent bioluminescence.”

“Well, they certainly know how to light up the night!”

Logan sighed at that, but he was smiling.

As they took in the iridescent beauty circling around them, an idea lit up in Patton’s head. With a wide grin, he jumped up from the picnic blanket and held his hands out towards Logan.

“Dance with me.”

Logan blinked up at Patton. “What?

Patton made grabby hands at him. “Come dance with me.”

“But…there’s no music, a-and I don’t really –” Logan started saying before he stopped. Patton was looking down at him with a pretty pronounced pout. Logan caved then. How could he possibly say no to his other half? So, he extended his own hands and allowed Patton to enthusiastically grab ahold of them and pull him to his feet.

Patton maneuvered them both into a basic starting position: he placed one of Logan’s hands on his waist, then he rested one of his own hands on Logan’s shoulder, and finally their remaining hands grasped each other, almost like they were about to start a waltz. Once they were in position, Patton led them into a simple slow dance, just swaying them back and forth, left and right.

Logan was rather stiff at first; he wasn’t much for dancing. Or, at least, he wasn’t much for dancing in public. He didn’t like having attention on himself, not like Patton. And also, even if he did do a little bit of dancing in his own free time – which he didn’t! – he always thought that music was a necessary accompaniment to physical activity to ensure movement and whatnot. So, them just dancing to nothing was a little jarring for Logan.

But as they continued, Logan took in his surroundings. The light and dark modes of the Imagination allowed them to see something different as they turned around. He had to admit that there was something special about being able to see the world in both ways at once, and how the sounds of nature acted as their accompaniment. Also, the fact that it was just him and Patton, no one else around – well, except for the cookie thief – meant that no one was watching them. They could enjoy each other’s company in peace. Lastly, he looked down at the Side in front of him. Patton was glowing with enthusiasm, enjoying himself. Patton had always been better at celebrating the little moments in life than Logan. Dating the lively figment had shown him how to slow down and just breathe, even for a few minutes. That there was more to life than just being a Side and performing their function as a part of someone’s personality.

So, Logan slowly began to relax and allow himself to just be in the moment, be with Patton, nothing more, nothing less. He relished in the warmth and closeness between him and his love, and how it was just the two of them. Patton could feel Logan loosening up, and that in turn both turned up his joy and made him let go of his own trepidation, too (he’d been a little worried about stepping on Logan’s feet due to his clumsiness). As they kept swaying and turning, the proper dancing positions they’d started in slowly fell away as the space between them became non-existent. Patton wrapped his arms around Logan’s neck, and Logan wrapped his arms around Patton’s waist. They touched their foreheads together and they just held each other tenderly, still continuing to sway.

This lasted a little while longer, then Patton looked up and took in the moment. Something about being just the two of them, surrounded by all this beauty and magic, filled Patton with a euphoria he hadn’t felt in a long time. Just a bubbly joy popping and bursting inside of him, making his limbs tingle and his feet itch. He loved it. He loved this setting they were in. And he loved Logan.

With a laugh, Patton started swinging and spinning them around enthusiastically. Logan was caught off guard by the sudden change in the comfortable dance routine they’d fallen into, nearly tripping over his feet in the process. But Patton’s joy and enthusiasm was infectious, so Logan couldn’t help but go along with it. He let out a startled laugh himself, but, again, knowing they weren’t being watched, he let it happen. Soon, their laughter was the only sound ringing through the air, besting the birds and overshadowing the crickets. After a while, they stopped so as not to make themselves too dizzy.

Catching their breath from the increase in physical activity, Logan and Patton took in the new sight they were bearing witness to.

Patton was now standing in the moonlight, and Logan was standing in the sunlight.

If seeing one another in the light gradient that suited them most had further endeared them to one another, it was nothing compared to when they each stood in its opposite.

In the moonlight, Patton seemed like a watercolour sketch, his edges blurred and softened by Mother Nature’s night filter, the glitter on his cheeks now twinkling like stardust.

In the sunlight, Logan came across like a supernova, exploding in an ineffable burst of sound and light, his normally immaculate hair now all wild and flaring out like a solar flare.

Unable to look away, Logan and Patton stared at one another.

Then, in a bold display of courage, Logan gathered Patton into his arms, sliding his arms fully around the moral Side’s waist and pulling him close.

Patton let out a squeak and braced himself by resting his forearms against Logan’s chest, his fingertips just resting over the slope of Logan’s shoulders. He looked up, face bright with awe and love. The light in his eyes increased in intensity. It seemed impossible that it could burn any brighter, but it did.

As they stood in that loving embrace, the two Sides felt everything that made up the world around them fall into place and settle. Safety and comfort made tangible and all-encompassing. The world around them crawled to a tranquil quiet, still and hushed, as though holding its breath in anticipatory observance of what the two Sides would do next.

To Patton and Logan, they knew what was going to happen.

This was it. The moment they’d been waiting for, not just all day, but ever since they’d realized how much the other meant to them. How they’d wanted to share everything that made each of them endearing to the other, and all that set them apart, too. This time, this place, this opportunity, was right where they should be, and it just felt so right.

Caught once more in that magnetic pull, slowly but surely, Patton and Logan’s faces drew closer to each other, much like what happened all those weeks ago when Patton had nearly fallen down the stairs and Logan had saved him. But this time, for Logan, there was no hesitation. No self-consciousness. No balking. And for Patton, there was no uncertainty. No nerves. No second-guessing.

And right then and there, the world fell away as the heart and mind united as one. Every opposite half seamlessly slotted into place like the last prodigal puzzle pieces.

Cool water cascaded over Patton’s head, akin to jumping into a refreshing pool on a hot summer’s day. An airy breeze wafted into his face, helping to bring down the warmth in his face a bit to prevent him from overheating. With Logan in his arms, the ground felt sturdier beneath his feet, and not just in the literal sense. Patton felt steady when he was with Logan: less unsure, more apt to listen than react, less impulsive, more calm, more likely to think his actions and arguments through. Logan tempered his energy enough so that it didn’t get out of control, but not completely so that he wasn’t his usual happy pappy self.

Warmth rushed from the top of Logan’s head all the way down to his toes, as though he’d laid down to soak in the full brunt of the sun’s rays fully. And the only thing he could feel was…comfort. Loving and unconditional. When he was with Patton, Logan laughed more, smiled more. He was less quick to temper and more willing to listen through other people’s arguments that were pathos-leaning. Patton helped him to be less judgmental, less calculating, more open to new ideas and approaches that he’d otherwise dismiss completely or sneer at for not being within the realm of reason he was used to.

Patton’s hands reached up to cradle the underside of Logan’s face as he smiled into the kiss. Logan smiled back as he drew his arms tighter around Patton’s waist, pressing him further against his person. The contrasting sensations and temperatures danced around each other much like when they’d actually been dancing before: weaving and skimming but never clashing. And throughout their shared intimacy, the fireflies rose up around them like a protective barrier, as though shielding them from any unwanted attention or intruders in the vicinity.

Soon, they had to come up for air, and Logan and Patton pulled back from the kiss. They both heaved tiny sighs and then looked up at each other. Both had flushed cheeks and bright eyes, and both were feeling fuller and more complete than they ever did before.

Logan felt something bubbling up in his chest, and he started to chuckle, which turned into a giggle, which ended in full-on laughter. Then – in a rare act of exuberance – Logan lifted Patton into his arms and spun him around in a circle, laughing loud and joyfully. Patton squealed in surprise but also delight, wrapping his arms around Logan’s neck and holding on tight. His skirt flared out with the momentum, and it seemed like he became an extension of the day sky, the butterflies coming to life and flitting gayly on their canvas.

Once he’d completed a full turn or two, Logan carefully lowered Patton back onto the ground but kept his hold on him. Patton beamed up at him then cuddled in close, resting his head against Logan’s chest and sighing in contentment. Logan’s own smile widened and he drew Patton closer again, arms wrapped fully around him, with one holding on his upper back and the other cradling his waist, then laid his head against Patton’s.

Holding each other tenderly, they looked back up at the sky. They once more noted the contrast of the day and night modes the Imagination was in. But, this time, the differences felt less divisive and more unifying. They saw the opposites coexisting in harmony alongside each other: the sun and moon, the stars and fireflies, the warmth and cold – all of it. How they complemented one another and propped each other up. Fortifying strengths and buffering weaknesses. Never clashing, taking turns, giving each one their time in the transient state of nature. If that wasn’t a metaphor for something, neither knew what was.

Taking his eyes off of the wide expanse stretching above him for a moment, Logan lowered his head down to place a kiss on Patton’s forehead. Patton shivered at the action and looked back up at Logan, a lopsided smile on his face. Logan grinned back at him. The date hadn’t been what either of them had expected, but…if they were being honest, this was better than what they had planned for.

Just then, a strange noise that sounded like a ‘peep’ broke through the quiet. Logan and Patton startled and looked around them, confused.

“What was that?’ asked Patton.

“I don’t know,” Logan replied.

Then they heard the peeping sound again, but this time, it sounded like it was right in front of them.

Logan and Patton looked down, and they blinked at what they saw.

Right in front of them, looking up at them with tiny, beady black eyes, was a tiny yellow duckling.

Logan’s mouth opened slightly in surprise, which immediately clicked shut again as Logan winced at Patton’s high-pitched squeal. The moral Side’s eyes were wide with excitement, and he flapped his hands hard enough that they were a blur for a few seconds before covering his mouth with them. He looked back at Logan with an expression that Logan (privately) called Patton’s ‘enamoured by cute, baby animals’ face.

“Oh my gosh, Logan! A baby duck! Where did it –”

The tail end of Patton’s sentence broke off when he looked back, due to his excitement morphing back into confusion.

There were now three ducklings standing in front of them, looking blithely back up at them. Patton and Logan exchanged bewildered looks.

“Wait. Where’d the other two come from?”

“I’m…not sure. But there’s probably –”

This time, Logan was the one who trailed off when he looked back down, his bemusement growing.

Five ducklings now looked up at them.

His own confusion increasing, Patton looked around them. “Hold on. Where’re their parents? Are they all alone out here?”

“Wait, Patton –”

Seven ducklings.

The pattern continued a few more times, with one Side or the other inadvertently looking away for even a millisecond, whether to look at each other or their surroundings, and before they knew it, there were twenty-one ducklings surrounding them, peeping and cheeping and waddling about. Some were pure yellow, others were dark brown, and others still were a mottled mixture between the two colours.

Logan ran a hand through his hair, his bewilderment at an apex. “I – what – how –”

But Patton, while no less befuddled, soon fell swiftly under the spell of the adorableness of the ducklings. He stepped forward and knelt down on the ground, his skirt spreading out around him like a Disney Princess. Immediately the ducklings took to him like such, swarming around him, settling on his skirt and trying to climb up into his lap. Patton was beyond delighted, and he cooed and chatted with the little creatures to his heart’s content.

Logan stayed standing up, feeling awkward and unsure of what to do. Then he heard a series of deep quacks a little off to his right, and he turned his head to look.

Sitting a little off from where they were, keeping a safe distance but still in full view of the ducklings, were two adult Mallard ducks. A quick look-over told Logan that they were two males. A brief staring contest took place between the humanoid figment and the Anas platyrhynchos, with nothing said between them. Logan wondered very briefly where the mothers were.

Then it hit him. He remembered that homophobia doesn’t exist in the animal kingdom, so these mallards were likely partners.

As though to prove his point, one of the mallards let out a quack and pressed its bill into the other’s neck. The other, in turn, turned its head to nuzzle their beak against the other’s head.

At this sight, Logan smiled. Nature truly was a wonder.

Then he looked back down at the other wonder in front of him. Patton was still basking in the adoring attention of the ducklings. Thankfully, no more had spawned since they’d reached the current number they were at, so this way they wouldn’t be overrun with them. As it was, Patton’s lap had no less than ten ducklings, his shoulders were occupied by one occupant each, and two somehow managed to make it to the top of his head.

Logan chuckled at the sight, then he lowered himself onto the ground as slowly and carefully as he could, so as not to spook the ducklings nor his sweetheart.

At hearing the shuffling next to him, Patton turned his head as best he could so as not to jostle his passengers. His face was aglow with joy and wonder, and the light in his eyes was as bright as the sun itself. Logan’s smile widened at Patton’s happiness, and he leaned forward to carefully kiss Patton’s cheek.

As he did, he thought to himself that, maybe, Roman had been right. The date had needed more ducks.

*******

The door to the Imagination creaked open and Logan and Patton stepped out into the corridor, holding hands and with lazy, blithe smiles on their faces. Once they were through, Logan turned around and pulled Patton into another embrace, Patton letting out a giggle as he did so. Without looking, Logan waved his hand and shut the door to the Imagination, and then he brought Patton in for another kiss. Patton sighed contentedly and stroked Logan’s cheek lovingly with a thumb. Logan cradled the back of Patton’s head tenderly, chest warm and full.

“So…I take it the date went well?”

Patton and Logan broke apart at the voice, looking around to see Roman and Virgil standing a few feet away from them, amused yet fond looks on their faces. Logan cleared his throat and adjusted his tie.

“Yes, it was…satisfactory. In more ways than one.”

“Everything was perfect!” Patton cheered, the grin on his face almost splitting his face open.

Roman squeeed, shaking excited fists, then he came forward and pulled Patton into a hug. As the right-brained Sides chittered and chattered about what happened, Virgil slunk over to where Logan was and gently nudged his shoulder with his own, smirking slightly.

“That good, huh?” he quipped.

Logan blushed slightly and looked away, but he couldn’t keep a smile from coming over his face.

“Quite.”

After Roman and Patton broke apart, Patton skipped over to Virgil to give him a hug as well. Virgil – though not one for frequent physical affection – allowed it, smiling slightly as he did. He was glad to see Patton so happy, and he listened as Patton babbled happily about the date, interjecting with a comment every so often.

While this was happening, Logan made his way over to Roman and held out his hand. Roman looked at it in surprise before taking it. Logan gave him a firm handshake and smiled. “Immaculate job, Roman. That was some splendid work.”

Roman blushed and cleared his throat. “O-Of course! Nothing but the best from yours truly!”

Logan’s eyes softened and he said, in a quieter tone: “You really did do a good job, Roman. I don’t think I’ve ever seen the Imagination as beautiful as it was today.”

Roman squeaked and looked down, flustered. He really wasn’t too good with genuine compliments, and especially if they were coming from Logan of all Sides. Logan saw this and took pity on him, so he switched topics.

“Did Patton also come to you about the date?” he asked under his breath.

Grateful for the change in topic, Roman nodded and grunted: “Yeah.”

Logan snickered at that and shook his head.

“I hope it didn’t mess it up too much. I know that –”

Logan stopped him with a hand on his arm, his eyes understanding. “It’s fine, Roman. It all worked out in the end. I haven’t seen Patton this happy in a while.”

Roman looked over at the Dynamic Duo – Patton was still chattering a mile a minute and Virgil was still listening and nodding though Roman could tell that his social spoons were starting to run low – and smiled. “Yeah, me neither.”

Then Logan looked back at the prince with a smirk. “More ducks, huh?”

Roman squirmed and shifted on his feet slightly. “Um, well –”

Logan chuckled and patted his arm. “You were right. It did need it.”

Roman looked back up at Logan, face still red and with surprised yet delighted eyes. Logan smiled back at him.

When Patton ran out of steam, Virgil let out a breath and said: “All right, well, good to see you two had a great time. I think I’m gonna head back to my –”

A peep cut through Virgil’s sentence, seeming to echo throughout the corridor.

Everyone froze, blinking at each other in surprise.

“What was –”

Then three pairs of eyes looked at the last remaining pair, who was shifting slightly on his ballet-flatted feet as though he was hiding something.

Logan lifted an eyebrow. “Patton…did you take one of the ducklings from the Imagination?”

Patton squirmed a bit then looked up with an unconvincing smile.

“Um…no?”

Another peep squeaked out, this time louder and coming from the general vicinity of where Patton was.

A woosh was heard, followed by a tsk.

“Really, lying to your beloved? I never thought you’d do such a shameful thing, Patton.”

Virgil and Roman stiffened slightly as Janus popped into view but held their tongues, not wanting to break the present happy atmosphere.

Patton blushed scarlet but – under Janus’ steely gaze – slipped a hand into one of his pockets and pulled out a yellow-and-dark-brown ball of fuzz. The fuzzball untwisted itself till its head was free before looking around at the company surrounding it and peeped.

Logan sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose. “You couldn’t help yourself, could you?” he said wearily. But there was no true anger or even irritation in his tone, which helped Patton relax a little.

“I mean, how could I not?” He lifted up the duckling to eye-level, eyes sparkling. “He’s just so cute!”

Roman and Virgil rolled their eyes fondly. That was their Patton. Then they turned to look at Janus with less fond expressions.

“Is there a reason why you’re up here, snake?’

Janus pressed a hand to his chest as though hurt. “Am I not allowed to share in the joy of our fellow comrades?”

Virgil sneered. “I never thought you cared much in the way of being a team player.”

“Boys…”

Virgil and Roman winced. Patton had put on his ‘Dad’ voice. Recognizing a need for civility when it was necessary, they cut their confrontation short, though it didn’t stop them from throwing hard looks at Janus’ own smug one.

“At least there’s only one of them here,” Roman muttered under his breath quietly.

“Think again, Ro-Bro!”

Everyone jumped at that, including Janus, and immediately looked up. Remus was sitting upside-down on the ceiling, grinning that Cheshire-cat grin of his. The chaotic trait twisted himself once, twice, then fell towards the ground. Everyone turned their heads away just in time to avoid watching the impact, though they couldn’t block out the sickening CRUNCH that accompanied it.

Janus sighed, muttering “Oh, Remus…” under his breath with his eyes closed.

After snapping his limbs back in place, Remus twisted his neck this way and that to get out every last crack he could possibly get, relishing in the cringes he got from everyone. Then he turned towards the two lovebirds, with Logan looking down on him coolly and Patton looking a little nauseated. Remus immediately noticed the duckling in Patton’s hands.

“Aww, a duckie! How cute! Hey, didja know that male ducks have corkscrew penises that can reach up to almost ten inches? That’s more than half their body length! And if there’re as many as three or more male ducks and one female duck, they’ll actually conduct a fucking gang bang! Sometimes injuring or even killing the female! But hey, that’s why the females evolved to have vaginas that’re like fucking mazes –”

“OKAY, Remus! Thank you very much for that commentary! Very helpful of you!”

Janus’ sarcasm was not lost on anyone, not even Remus, who simply didn’t care. Grinning wildly, he blipped out of existence and back right behind Logan and Patton, throwing his arms around their shoulders and catching them off guard.

“So, anyways! It looks like the date went well, considering the sappy looks on your faces!”

The expressions on their faces were very much not of the sappy kind at that moment; Logan had his stoic mask in place and Patton was trying very hard not to cringe at the duke’s close proximity. Luckily, Logan took up the initiative to continue the conversation.

“Yes, Remus. Thankfully, very little went wrong, so, all in all, it was a successful excursion.”

“Y-Yeah, it was!” Patton managed to stammer out. Remus still unnerved him, but he was truly trying his best to be nice around him.

Remus grinned wider and he gave their shoulders a strangely comforting squeeze. “Glad to hear that! If you two’re happy, then that’s good enough for me!”

Everyone stopped at that. Remus, giving a nice compliment? Was this real life or some sick twisted reality the Mindscape had thrown them into? But the look now on Remus’ face was softer than usual, more genuine. So…it seemed that he wasn’t bullshitting with them. Virgil and Roman were at a loss, Janus’ face was unreadable, though his eyes seemed a smidge softer as he looked back at the intrusive Side, and Patton and Logan were truly gobsmacked. This was so unlike Remus: being sincere and contained in his chaos. Maybe that was why it made it all the more meaningful. So, they returned tiny half-smiles, not quite fully trusting but willing to extend an olive branch.

Of course, it didn’t last long.

“So! You two gonna fuck now?”

“REMUS!”

“What? They went on a date, they’re hot for each other, now’s a good time for a juicy session of stuffing the meat locker!”

“Oh – my – fucking – GOD –”

Shouts of disgust and shock rang throughout the hallway at Remus’ words. Remus simply shrugged and took out a nail file to smooth out his acrylics.

Virgil sighed noisily. “Okay, well, that’s my cue. I’m out. See you guys tomorrow.”

Roman waved. “Have a good evening, Emo! Hopefully no nightmares befall you in your sleep!”

Virgil rolled his eyes. “I think after having to stare at your face all night, Princey, I think I can handle a nightmare or two.”

Roman gasped in indignation, and Virgil smirked back at him.

“Oh, please! As if the two of you weren’t cozying up to each other all night!”

The look of indignation and smirk were swiftly wiped off the faces of their respective owners who whipped around at the intrusive Side and chorused in strangled voices: “WHAT?”

Logan blinked. Janus’ eyebrow raised a fraction of an inch. And Patton squealed: “You guys were cuddling?! Oh my gosh!! I can’t believe I missed that!”

“How – how did you – where –” Roman could barely get the words out. Virgil’s face was as pale as his foundation.

Janus looked at Remus with a calculating slit-eye. “Did you hide behind the couch again?”

Remus tilted his head innocently. “Mmm, maybe! I may have been in the middle of planning another Rube Goldberg machine so I may have been testing things out behind there and then, when they came and sat down, I may have peeked in on them from time to time!”

Janus hummed thoughtfully at this. Then he said: “So, what happened next?”

“Janus –”

“Wait! I wanna know –”

“We don’t –”

“Let’s not –”

But Remus, looking for all the world like Halloween had come early and delighted to have a captive audience, ignored Roman and Virgil’s protests and plowed on.

“So, while I was behind the couch, they came into the common room after seeing Nerdy Wolverine and Pattycakes off on their date to watch some movies! They started arguing ‘bout what movie to watch – Ro-Bro wanted to watch Disney as usual, and Emo wanted to watch something horror-related! Finally, they decided to compromise and watch Nightmare Before Christmas since it’s both scary AND it’s owned by Disney! At first, they just watched it quietly and sang along to the songs so I ignored them and carried on with my thing. But THEN Emo started crying during ‘Sally’s Song’ and Ro-Ro immediately went to comfort him, and from that moment on they continued cuddling through the rest of the film!”

Both Roman and Virgil looked like they wanted nothing more than for the ground to open up and swallow them whole. Logan and Janus both had mild expressions of surprise. But Patton was beaming and would have pressed his hands into his cheeks if he wasn’t still holding the duckling.

“OH, that is ADORABLE!” he squealed, and Virgil hid his face in his hands.

Janus smiled crookedly. “Who would’ve thought that big, bad, Anxiety was actually a softie?”

“Nooooooo,” Virgil moaned, trying to disappear into thin air. Roman was also trying to make himself as small as possible.

Remus cackled. “Yeah! I guess I was wrong about which Sides should be fucking!”

Roman started sputtering, face as crimson as his sash, and Virgil hid inside his hoodie, pulling the hood strings tight. Remus roared with laughter on the floor while holding his stomach and Janus smirked, shoulders shaking in silent laughter.

Logan rolled his eyes at the ridiculousness happening in front of him before he looked down to his side. Patton was leaning against him, giggling at the others’ antics and having recovered from Remus’ usual discord. His face was open with laughter and happiness. Logan’s face softened and he smiled down at his sweetheart, wrapping an arm around Patton’s waist and pulling him in closer against him. Patton looked up at him and beamed, the light in his eyes bright and effervescent. He slowly lifted up his hands so that the duckling was closer to Logan’s face. The duckling blinked up at Logan and gave a tiny peep. Logan chuckled and – understanding the silent cue Patton was communicating to him – put out a finger to scritch the top of its head.

Yes, things went a little more differently than what he’d expected or wanted. But he wouldn’t have had it any other way.

28 notes · View notes

melanie-adia-of-the-multiverse · 3 years

Text

Light and Tenderness

Summary: Patton loves being the emotional Side. He really does. He just wishes he could keep his emotions in check better. Especially when it comes to a certain stoic Side.

Pairing: Logicality

Word Count: 21,276

Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Angst/Fluff

Warnings: Minor arson (courtesy of Remus), Remus being Remus, very mild language (a minuscule amount but just in case), food, self-deprecation, self-doubt, self-worth issues, self-esteem issues, misunderstandings, distress, repressing feelings, anger, shouting, crying (lots of it), guilt, kissing (but not on the lips)

AO3 Link

Author’s Note: Greetings to all. I actually posted this on Patton’s ‘birthday’ on AO3, but my mind slipped about posting it here, hence the lateness. A little something to commemorate both his existence and my entry into the world of posting fanfiction. Although I've been writing for most of my life, this isn't my first fic. However, it IS the first fic I've ever posted online for anyone to read, and this is the first fandom where I actually wanted to contribute creatively to it, so Sanders Sides now has two special distinctions in this regard. I’m always trying to improve my writing, and though this ended up being longer than I anticipated, my hope is that it’s as well-thought out as I could possibly make it, and that people find it entertaining. Thank you for your time, take care, be safe, and enjoy.

A dad joke was what got the ball rolling.

It had been a quiet day; Thomas hadn’t anything important to focus on or get done, so he’d spent the day relaxing at home, which, in turn, meant that his Sides were relaxing in the living room of the Mindscape. They were each doing their own thing while enjoying one another’s company. Logan was sitting in his armchair reading a book on neuroscience. Virgil was lying on one end of the couch with his headphones on, scrolling through Tumblr on his phone. Roman was sitting on the floor at the coffee table and writing in a journal, brow furrowed in concentration as he tried to will imagery, rhymes and other lyrical adornments into his prose. And Patton was sitting on the other end of the couch, colouring in a colouring book on his lap with crayons. It was a simple book collection of various cute animals, and he was currently using a Prussian blue crayon to scribble inside of the outline of an adorable golden retriever. Why he chose blue? Just because. Things didn’t always have to be the same colour as they were in real life; when drawing or painting or doing any kind of artsy-fartsy stuff, anyone could make anything any colour they wanted!

(It totally had nothing to do with the idea that maybe the crayon’s hue had made him think of a particular professor. *cough, cough*)

At some point, Patton looked up from his drawing and took in the scene around him, a smile growing on his face at the sight of his famILY. Then his gaze fell on Logan, and his smile turned into something softer, a warmth pulsing in his chest. The sun’s rays of the Mindscape were shining through the window, hitting Logan in just the right way wherein all the best parts of him were illuminated: the broad frame of his shoulders; his immaculately coiffed hair looking like it had golden highlights; his sharp features that contributed to his ‘serious’ nature, including his sculpted cheekbones and pointed nose; the light glinting off the matching Warby Parker frames and hiding his eyes from view; and his mouth that was always in a perpetual pout. These were just a few of the many reasons why Patton thought of Logan as the ‘good-looking’ one in the group (although, if ever asked outright, he’d say all of them were good-looking, which made sense since they were all parts of the same person).

Patton wasn’t sure when it started, nor could he recall when he’d realized the fact; it kind of developed slowly and quietly. What he knew for certain, though, was that he had had feelings for Logan for as long as he could remember, and he was keenly aware of the flutter in his heart and the warmth in his chest whenever Logan even entered a room. Patton just couldn’t help it, and he didn’t want to.

His smile faltered then, and Patton heaved a quiet sigh. No matter how much he yearned and wished and hoped, Patton didn’t and wouldn’t dare act on his feelings.

His relationship with the logical Side, though better nowadays, had always been difficult. Even when Thomas was a child and was beginning to learn more about the world around him and make decisions on everyday things, Logan and Patton – as Thomas’ metaphysical representations of his mind and heart – continuously (and metaphorically, not literally ‘cos then both would’ve had constant boo-boos, thank goodness) butted heads on whether Thomas should go the proper route (“Thomas has two hours’ worth of homework to complete! He cannot watch TV right now!”) or the fun route (“But it’s his favourite cartoon! Plus, he’ll have plenty of time to do it after dinner!”). That’s just how it was – and still is – with them. They are total opposites, constantly clashing with different ideals and thoughts on what they think is best for Thomas. It’s like trying to mix oil and water.

Also, as the Side of reason and rational thinking, Logan often denied that he had emotions and didn’t think much or highly of love, romance and affection. Things that were very personal and dear to Patton (well, maybe not so much with romance; that’s more Roman’s domain).

So, that was why Patton was certain that Logan could and would never feel the same way for him like he did for Logan, a thought that made his heart crack a little. But he just pushed it all down, squared his shoulders, pasted on a smile and went on with life as normal. It was fine. It was all fine. Even though he and Logan could never be together, they could at least have their friendship, which was good enough for Patton. It was. And especially after what happened after the wedding, Patton didn’t dare do anything else to make things go south again.

Even when his heart wanted something more.

At any rate, Patton shook himself out of his thoughts and turned his focus back on finishing colouring in the dog. When he was done, he looked at his handiwork with a pleased smile on his face then turned to the anxious Side, reaching out a finger to tap Virgil’s foot.

Virgil started slightly and looked up from his phone, only to relax when he realized it was just Patton and lifted up one of his headphones. “What’s up, Pop Star?”

Patton grinned wide. “Whaddaya think, Virge?” He held up the colouring book with the dog page facing Virgil.

Virgil took a moment to scan the picture and a smirk tugged at the corners of his mouth. “Nice, Pat. But why’d you colour it blue?”

Patton shrugged. “Wanted to change things up a bit. And I like blue. Besides, life’s blue short to be worrying about what colour things should be!”

The dad Side was rewarded with twin groans from Virgil and Roman (who’d been half-listening to the conversation), which just made him smile happily. He was about to go back to colouring in more of the picture when a huffed chuckle made him turn his head in direction of it.

Logan was looking up from his book, a half-smile on his face which still sent Patton’s stomach into mini somersaults. “That was rather amusing, Patton.”

Patton’s eyes widened and his mouth parted slightly, incredulous. Did…did Logan actually do what he thought he did? Evidently, both Roman and Virgil thought the same thing, staring at the logical Side as they were.

“Woah…Lo actually found one of Pat’s dad jokes funny,” Virgil said in a low but surprised tone.

“Indeed,” Roman breathed. “And he complimented it, too! I was always under the impression that you hated Padre’s puns, Teach!”

Logan leveled the creative Side with an even stare and pushed his glasses up his nose with a finger. “ ‘Hate’ is a strong adjective to use, Roman. While it’s true that, in the past, I’ve reacted with significant aversion whenever Patton made a joke or pun, I do sometimes find them to be quite witty.”

“You do?”

Everyone’s heads turned towards Patton, who was still staring at Logan as if he’d just said that Patton was the smartest Side in the Mindscape. It had to be a joke, right? Logan would never say anything like what he just did. But Logan was Logan. He didn’t do jokes. When he tried to, they fell flat or were too elaborately thought-out. The teacher trait was always better at saying things as they were, anyway. So, this had to mean that he’d actually meant what he’d said.

He hoped…

Logan’s cool expression that he’d maintained during his interaction with Roman – upon looking back at Patton – softened slightly at Patton’s question. “Of course, Patton. Although not at the level of, say, someone like myself or Roman, you do possess a certain level of command of the English language in the form of punchlines and plays-on-words, which is admirable in its own way.“

It was a good thing Patton was sitting on the couch already because he was sure that he was going to fall backwards in shock. First, Logan – the resident no-nonsense Side – laughed at a dad joke that Patton had made, and then he complimented Patton on being able to crack jokes and puns when he usually – though Patton didn’t like using the word – ‘hated’ them…well, he honestly wasn’t sure how to react.

“I…thank you?” Patton finally replied with, not really sure why he’d said it in the form of a question, but what else could he have said?

But it seemed to be enough for Logan who gave him a small real smile this time and nodded at him once before turning back to his book. And for a split second before he did, Patton thought he saw the faintest of flushes flit across Logan’s cheeks as Logan went back to reading.

Patton was still staring at Logan when the quiet moment was broken by twin yells ringing through the air. Both Patton and Logan whipped their heads around to see Roman throwing himself away from the coffee table as his notebook suddenly burst into flames; Virgil had backed further into the cushions of the couch, wide fearful eyes staring at the – still relatively small – vermilion conflagration eating up the well-worn pages of Roman’s writings.

Then a maniacal cackle from above them had all four Sides looking up to see Remus hanging from the ceiling light, Cheshire-cat grin almost splitting his face open.

“Looks like your fancy-ass words are all going up in smoke, Ro-Bro!” he crowed.

The scene devolved into chaos then, with Logan immediately summoning a fire extinguisher to put out the fire before it spread, Roman trying to cut Remus down from the ceiling with his katana and bellowing about his lost writings as Remus howled with delighted, deranged laughter, Virgil hissing like an angry cat and Patton just trying to get everyone to calm down.

As all of this was going on, he and Logan managed to make eye contact for a few seconds, and Patton thought he saw something in Logan’s eyes, something he’d never seen in the logical trait before, and he wondered…

But he couldn’t get a read on it before Logan quickly broke the eye contact and continued his fire safety measures, leaving Patton to blink blankly after him.

Then Janus showed up to gloat at the scene and Virgil started hissing at him, and Patton forgot all about what had happened prior – for the moment, at least – and got back to work trying to bring about order.

*******

Later on that week, Patton was back in the common area, but alone this time. He was re-watching Steven Universe and marveling at how simple things were in the show back then. Though, having watched Steven Universe: Future when it came out, he couldn’t help but notice all the subtle but heavy subtext the epilogue series had brought to light, but he tried his best to focus on the soft, pastel vibe and wacky character interactions.

He was currently watching the two-part finale of the first season, and he was at the part where Garnet was facing off against Jasper and rapping out her signature song and the first major hit of the show. Patton bopped to the catchy tune and sang along with the Crystal Gem leader. He felt lucky to be a figment of someone who was a great singer (though, he privately thought, Thomas had a long way to go before he could match along the likes of Estelle, but he believed in his kiddo! He’d get there, someday!). He crooned in a low, soft tone, contrasting with the loud, bold belt of the fusion onscreen:

“I am made

O-o-o-o-of

Lo-o-o-o-ove

And it’s stronger than you.

Lo-o-o-o-ove

O-o-o-o-of

Lo-o-o-o-ove

And it’s stronger than you.”

Patton shimmied more enthusiastically during the musical interlude, really getting into his couch dance. He was having so much fun that when he heard a throat being cleared, he almost jumped with a yelp. He looked towards the stairs, and flushed instantly.

Logan was standing on the raised landing at the bottom of the stairs with an amused expression on his face and holding a stack of stapled paper in his hands. Patton immediately moved to grab the remote and mute the TV, face still slightly pink.

“H-Hey, Logan!” he stammered.

Logan chuckled mildly. “You seem to be having fun, Patton.”

“Y-Yeah! Y’know – just – just enjoying a mini dance break in between songs!” Patton fiddled with his cat hoodie sleeves hanging over his shoulders. Why was he feeling embarrassed about being caught dancing and singing? It was just Logan.

Well, maybe it was because it was Logan. Logan sometimes thought what Patton did was a waste of time and energy – TV watching, cat video surfing on YouTube, flipping through old photo albums – nothing productive except to distract Thomas from more important things like script writing, video editing and meetings with his professional team. Which…wasn’t wrong. Patton knew what he did wasn’t always helpful in the long run, that it only eased the stress and tension of the current moment for a while while prolonging the inevitable. Most of the time he was able to shrug off the others’ remarks on his activities, but when it came to Logan…he cared maybe a teensy bit more about the logical Side’s opinion more than anyone else, and sometimes his comments hurt, even though they were true. And Patton had been having a good day today and didn’t want it to be ruined by anything Logan said. But he was here now, and so Patton hunched ever so slightly waiting for the blow.

A blow did come, but in the form of Patton nearly falling backwards into the couch when Logan said: “I think it’s good that you’re enjoying yourself. You’ve been helping Thomas quite a bit lately with some of the issues he’s been having, so it’s nice to see you having some…what’s it called again? Oh, yes: ‘down time’.” He said this last part while looking at one of his notecards that he’d managed to summon out of thin air. Which was good for Patton as his face had turned bright red. He had not been expecting that response at all.

While trying to get his face to cool down, Patton’s eyes landed on the papers in Logan’s hands and lunged at them as a change of subject. “Is that the latest Sanders Sides script?” he asked.

Logan, after vanishing his notecard away, looked back up at Patton briefly before looking down at the papers. “Yes, indeed. Roman and I just finished going through the first couple of drafts and we think it’s ready for Thomas to look through before getting started on scheduling for filming.”

Finally getting his skin tone back to a normal shade, Patton managed to send a smile at Logan. “That’s great! I can’t wait to see what we’re gonna work on next!”

Logan nodded, then looked down at the typed text again. The same faint flush from a few days ago peeked out of the apples of his cheeks. Patton’s eyes zoned in on them, scrutinizing them for a few seconds before refocusing on Logan when he spoke again. “I actually came here to seek your opinion on the new script before we send it back to Thomas.”

Patton blinked at Logan, the silence in the living room somehow deafening even with the TV on mute. Out of the corner of his eye, Patton caught violent flashes of mulberry, punch and seafoam – the confrontation between the Crystal Gems and Malachite was taking place on the screen now – but he paid no heed as he eyed the rational trait.

“You want me to read the script?” he said, surprised.

Logan nodded.

“But…why?”

It was a silly thing to say, but Patton couldn’t help it. It was rare for him to read through a script in its early stages. It wasn’t that he never read anything Thomas and his writers came up with; it was just that Roman and Logan had always been the de facto Sides to oversee the process: Roman with his ability to come up with video ideas and witty banter, and Logan to look up relevant information and definitions for various theories and lessons and to fact-check, spell-check and grammar-check the heck out of the words until things were as good as they could be. Patton and Virgil were less involved in the process because they were more feelings-based: Patton with all the emotions and Virgil – with his tendency to overthink things – just couldn’t handle the pressure; he kept away from the whole thing with a 10-foot pole. Once in a while Patton was allowed a cursory look over the script in its rough form, but in general he just didn’t have any part in the process. Which he was fine with, honestly. Though, sometimes he wished he knew what to expect, considering some videos when he’d gone in blind and was blindsided by a topic that squicked him.

Logan blinked at Patton’s statement, and a strange look passed over his face – too fast for Patton to discern what it was – before it settled back into its standard neutral state, though his eyes seemed softer than before. “Because you provide valuable contribution with your ability to emote and detect others’ emotions. I figured having someone look over the script to make sure we present a video that is emotionally-sensitive while still conveying whatever lesson we want to teach would be beneficial. And you’re the best Side to do that.”

Patton blinked owlishly, bewildered by the kind comment, but his hands silently reached out for the script. Logan walked towards him in a few long, quick strides and placed it into his hands. Patton looked at him a moment longer before looking down and flipping the title page over to begin reading through. He vaguely registered Logan sitting next to him on the couch, but his eyes focused on the words in front of him.

It took him maybe 20 minutes or so to go through the whole script, and during that time he would pipe up with a comment about something in the text that either confused him or thought needed a little tweaking, and Logan would either provide an explanation or nod and make a mental note to fix those sections later. When he was finished, Patton turned to give the script back to Logan. As he did, he noticed with a jolt that Logan was sitting closer to him than he’d realized, and the emotional trait just barely managed to stop himself from flushing again, though he couldn’t stop the flutter in his chest when he looked up into Logan’s face and saw Logan giving him a small smile.

“Thank you very much, Patton. I’m certain that, once we’ve made the necessary corrections, the script will be in prime condition for Thomas’ approval.”

Patton gave the teacher a big smile – but not too big though, don’t want to overdo it – and airily shrugged a shoulder. “No problem! Happy to help! Though I’m sure it would’ve been fine even without me looking it over.”

He thought that would’ve been the end of it, that Logan would nod and then get up and leave for his room immediately.

But Logan still sat there, still sitting close to Patton – close enough that their knees were almost touching, Patton couldn’t help but notice with a little thrill – and the same strange look from before came back, though this time it lingered. Patton still couldn’t decipher what it meant, which annoyed him a little; what was the point of being the emotional Side when he couldn’t always read what others were feeling? But then he looked into Logan’s eyes and paused. The same ‘something’ from before was back in them, more present than before, and for a brief moment Patton thought he knew what it was…but it was on the tip of his tongue (or, the top of his brain?), and no matter how much he grabbed at it, he couldn’t figure it out.

He stilled when he felt something on his shoulder, and he looked down to see that Logan had placed a hand on his shoulder. His brain promptly short-circuited.

Logan’s face seemed to soften more, and he said, in a soft, gentle tone: “You are invaluable, Patton. And important. And needed. Not only to Thomas, but to us, as well. I hope you know that.”

Patton gaped, mouth slightly ajar. Who was this Side and what did he do to Logan? Not only was Logan seeking him out and getting his thoughts on the script, but he was also telling Patton that he was important and needed? Patton didn’t know how much more of this he could take. But he managed to give a small jerky nod and whisper an “Okay…”

Logan gave him a small genuine smile and squeezed his shoulder, sending a rush of heat through Patton that made him feel lightheaded. Then the factual facet stood up, thanked Patton again for his help and left, leaving Patton sitting on the couch staring after him, thoughts and questions buzzing in his head and butterflies flitting in his chest.

*******

A few days later, Patton was in the kitchen preparing to make brownies. He’d had a long day of helping Thomas out with a few small moral dilemmas, and he felt drained. Usually, baking was a good way for him to relax, and it was even better when he did it with someone, which tended to be Roman or Virgil. Unfortunately, Roman was in the Imagination guiding Thomas through ‘daydream mode’, and Virgil was in his room needing some alone time. Although they’d been getting along better since the wedding, Janus wasn’t really the baking type, and Remus…well, Remus tended to want to add strange and unconventional ingredients in sweet treats, and Patton wasn’t really in the mood for any chaos that day.

That left Logan…but Logan was working, as always, and Patton couldn’t do that to Logan: asking if he wanted to help Patton out in the kitchen. He knew the logical Side didn’t like to be interrupted during his work, and, besides, what he did was more important than what Patton was doing. As much as he would love his company. Or anyone’s company, for that matter. But everyone was busy or had their own thing going on, and Patton wouldn’t take that away from them.

An ache twinged in his chest, and Patton closed his eyes and took a deep breath in and out. He was still learning to accept that he felt bad emotions too and to let them pass through. He really disliked the feeling, how unpleasant they were from good emotions, but he truly did understand that they were all a part of life, and necessary too, so long as he didn’t dwell on them for too long. Didn’t mean he had to like them, though.

Thankfully, he was able to breathe through the sad, lonely feeling he’d just felt before continuing gathering all the baking materials he still needed. He was just looking over the recipe to check if he’d missed anything when he heard a soft knocking on the open archway leading into the kitchen. Patton started a little before looking up to see who it was.

It was Logan, standing in the archway with his hands behind his back, perfect posture as always.

Patton’s heart skipped a beat and his face brightened in surprise and excitement. He usually tried not to make his crush so obvious, so though he couldn’t hold back the large smile that grew on his face, he just managed to keep his tone from getting too high-pitched as he chirped: “Hi, Logan!”

Logan gave him a small smile back. “Good afternoon, Patton. I see you’re about to do some baking.”

“Yep!” Patton motioned towards all the ingredients that were sitting on the island, ready to serve their purpose. “I was gonna make brownies today.”

Logan cocked his head to one side. “Don’t you usually make cookies?” he commented.

Patton paused. Logan paid attention to what Patton made during his baking sessions?

The dad figment bit down on the side of his mouth and shrugged one shoulder up slightly. “I wanted to do something different this time,” he mumbled, looking off to the side. Should he be making cookies, instead? He knew his double-chunk chocolate chip cookies were legendary throughout the Mindscape. Everyone loved them, even the Dark Sides. But he’d seen a recipe for salted-caramel fudge brownies one night – when Thomas had been doing some late 2 A.M. Internet browsing, which had piqued the moral Side’s interest – and wanted to try them out. But he also knew how the others felt when things deviated from the norm. Maybe he should ix-nay on the ownies-bray and go for the usual.

Patton was shaken out of his brooding when Logan continued: “Well, it’s good to try new things from time to time, so I’m sure whatever you’re making will still turn out delicious, as usual.”

Once again, Patton had no idea how to respond to Logan’s compliments, other than try and not flush too much. They were just so rare, and Logan saying nice things about Patton…it was lucky he couldn’t self-combust. That was an ability Remus happily laid claim to, to uncanny effect.

“I – I hope so! I mean, I’m sure they’ll be super-duper yummy!” Patton winced inwardly at the slight crack in his voice in the middle of his sentence, but he gave Logan another bright smile before turning back to the recipe print-out sitting on the island surface, pretending to reread the ingredients list whilst trying very hard to regain some composure. He didn’t get very far before Logan spoke up again:

“Would you like some assistance in your baking endeavour?”

Patton froze for a moment before lifting his head to look at Logan again.

“You…you wanna bake with me?”

Logan nodded. “Indeed…if you’re not opposed to it.” Logan suddenly seemed a little shy, and he tilted his head downwards ever so slightly, faintly blushing once again.

Patton wondered if he’d been a fish in a past life, because he just couldn’t seem to stop his mouth from gaping lately. But he couldn’t help it. Logan was actually asking if he could spend time with Patton – just the two of them – and seeming sincere about it too.

Then Patton remembered something and his brow furrowed. “Aren’t you busy? Like, with work and stuff?”

Logan blinked at Patton’s question for a moment before mildly shrugging his shoulders and reaching up to readjust his glasses. “I’ve been able to achieve a sufficient amount of progress on my tasks today, and, besides, taking short, regular breaks during the workday is essential for de-stressing and re-charging, not to mention helping improve overall job satisfaction and productivity.”

Patton made a note to carry around something soft in the future so that he could put it on the ground near him, because he was almost going to keel over with shock. Logan was willingly taking a break in his busy schedule to spend it with Patton? He had to be dreaming.

He was, once again, brought out of his thoughts when Logan said: “I understand if you’d prefer to go about this alone. I’ll just go back to my room and read something until my break’s over–“

“No!”

Logan started, and Patton inwardly cursed himself for his outburst. He pushed back his shoulders, pasted on a smile and said: “I’d be happy for you to help me.”

The same small, genuine smile spread on Logan’s face, and Patton felt his face heat up as Logan fully entered the kitchen and walked to the sink to wash his hands before they got started.

The baking session went better than Patton thought it ever could. Baking with Logan was different than when he baked with Virgil or Roman. Virgil preferred to watch because he was afraid of something going wrong (plus the whole fire thing). Patton would be able to coax him into at least stirring in the chocolate chips and rolling the dough into little balls, but otherwise Patton did all the work, which he was fine with. With Roman, he tended to be a little too boisterous, his grand gestures knocking over containers, sending utensils flying across the kitchen and leaving a bit of a mess behind, though he always graciously helped Patton clean up after they were done.

But when it was him and Logan, Patton found that they actually made quite a good team together. Logan was skilled at organizing ingredients by weight and amount down to the most accurate measurement, as well as evenly delegating tasks between them. They moved around one another seamlessly like a dance in motion without ever touching each other, though the times when they’d accidentally brush arms or graze fingers Patton would feel his face get warm again.

And as they made the salted caramel drizzle while they waited for the brownies to bake in the oven, Logan chimed in with various facts and insights on baking, ranging from the chemical reactions between certain ingredients to historical background on the treat itself and how it came to be beloved in the modern world. Patton found it all really interesting, and he hung onto Logan’s every word. He truly did enjoy listening to Logan talk: he loved how Logan’s eyes shone and his face lit up ever so slightly when he was on a topic that interested him or that he was knowledgeable about. The dad figment could listen to Logan talk forever…well, maybe almost forever. Even as a metaphysical representation of part of someone’s personality, he still needed sleep at some point. But generally, most of the time, he could listen to Logan talk on and on.

Soon, the oven beeped and Patton opened the door to take the brownies out and leave the tray on a wire rack on the counter to cool. As they did, Logan and Patton washed up the dirty utensils and bowls and wiped down the counters. When the brownies were finally cool enough, Patton carefully drizzled the caramel mixture with a spatula and Logan stood by with a paper towel to wipe away any spills. Then they both stood back and admired their handiwork.

“They look great!” Patton beamed. “I can’t wait to try them after dinner!”

Logan nodded in agreement. “I’m certain they’ll be quite tasty. So long as you don’t sneak any before then.”

Patton went bright red at the remark and turned away in embarrassment, hunching his shoulders slightly. But then he heard Logan chuckle and he looked back to see Logan looking at him with a slight smirk on his face. Relaxing a bit, Patton managed to send a smile back, though he still felt rather flushed.

Logan then checked the time on his watch. “Well, I suppose I should get back to work now. I’ll see you at dinner, Patton.”

“Sure,” Patton murmured, feeling the warmth in his chest recede a little as he watched Logan turn around and start walking out of the kitchen. Patton had loved every moment that he’d spent with Logan. They just worked so well together. He was a little sad for it to end, since he had no idea when it would ever happen again. Or if, even.

“Logan?” he found himself calling out. Logan stopped in the archway and turned back around to look at Patton. Patton fidgeted with his hands, vaguely aware of how sticky they were from the caramel. “I…I had a really good time with you today. Thank you.”

Once again, the same soft look came over Logan’s face, as well as the ‘something’ in his eyes. “You’re welcome, Patton. I, too, found the time spent doing this activity with you enjoyable.”

Patton’s heart gave a flip at those words, and he smiled shyly at Logan. He started turning around to go wash his hands when he heard Logan call after him, and he looked back to see Logan being a little fidgety himself, which was strange: Logan hardly got fidgety about anything.

Logan rubbed the fabric of his tie between his thumb and index finger while keeping his other hand behind his back. “The next time you’re baking, Patton, and no one else is available, I would be more than amenable to help out. You can just knock on my door and let me know.”

Patton stared at Logan. “R-Really?” he said, as if in wonder. “What if you’re busy?”

Logan winced slightly but replied: “Well…it is true that sometimes I may not always be available, but then I’ll ensure to block out time in my schedule for it on another day…if you have no objection to it.”

Logan seemed almost shy again when he said that, which was also unlike him. Patton didn’t know what to think. But he found himself breathing out in a whisper: “I’d love that.”

Logan seemed to beam back himself at that response. Not as brightly as Patton, but in a way that still took Patton’s breath away. “Satisfactory,” was all he said.

Then he turned and left the kitchen, once again leaving Patton standing there, wondering and puzzling, though the warmth in his chest remained.

*******

As time went on, Patton and Logan spent more time together, not just baking or cooking once a week, but doing other activities as well, and Logan was always the one to initiate them. They didn’t hang out in each other’s rooms since a Side’s room often affected the others adversely apart from the Side in question, so they would hang out in the common area, it being a neutral zone and all.

Sometimes they would sit in silence while Logan read and Patton watched YouTube videos on his phone, but Logan would pipe up every so often to share something he thought Patton would find interesting, which he did. In turn, Patton would pluck up the courage to show a video that he found funny or cute to Logan; he would generally respond with a small smile or a brief chuckle before going back to his book, but Patton took them as they came.

Other times they would just chat about various topics, and Patton noticed that Logan often chose subjects that were more in line with what Patton enjoyed, like animals, cartoons, food and flowers. Patton was always happy to talk about things he liked and knew about, especially since Logan paid close attention to him as he spoke, but he still made sure to balance out their conversations with things that Logan liked too, even though he wasn’t as knowledgeable about them as Logan. But his efforts seemed to please the teacher, and that brought the warmth in Patton’s chest back.

Patton couldn’t have been more thrilled with these additional moments of quality time with Logan, but he was still a bit puzzled. He didn’t know what had propelled Logan to be friendlier with him now, but he couldn’t complain, and he wouldn’t. Why would he? He was getting to spend time with the Side he looked up to the most, and it was wonderful. They were becoming better friends by the day, and Patton wouldn’t have it any other way.

Well, he did want it another way, but his head pushed that want deep down against his heart’s protests. Yes, Logan was being nicer to him. Yes, Logan was spending more time with him. And yes, Logan was seeking out Patton’s opinions and input more than before. But that was it. Nothing more. Because friends did that for each other all the time. And Patton had not gotten any wind that Logan liked him more than that. His heart would pipe up about the flushes and random bouts of shyness and even the ‘something’ in Logan’s eye that kept eluding Patton’s discernment, but his head would scoff and remind that Logan was not an emotional trait like the others; he wasn’t as proficient in the ways of social interactions and emotional cues, so it was normal for him to be awkward in these types of situations. His heart would still stubbornly flutter and hope though, and as Logan and Patton grew closer, the more he began to feel that maybe, just maybe, there was something there after all.

The biggest clue was presented to Patton when he nearly died.

Okay, ‘died’ is a strong word, but he’d nearly gotten hurt, if it weren’t for Logan being there to help him.

The Sides had had their biweekly movie night – The Emperor’s New Groove being that night’s film of choice – and were clearing away the spoils of their evening before turning in for the night. Roman was sweeping the floor of any snack crumbs, Virgil was wiping down the coffee table and fluffing up the cushions on the couch, and Logan and Patton were washing the snack bowls and drink glasses before putting them into the dishwasher.

Logan had just finished wiping his hands dry before reaching over the sink to turn off the still-running tap when he heard a giggle on his left side. He turned his head slightly to see Patton holding the last bowl in his hands, a mischievous glint in his eyes.

Logan raised an eyebrow at him. “Patton…”

Patton grinned wider. “Pull the lever, Logan!”

Logan let out a long-suffering sigh and flicked the tap off in one quick motion.

“Wrong lever!”

Logan rolled his eyes so hard Patton thought they’d actually fall out of his head (again, another ability that Remus eagerly delighted in showing off to everyone, sometimes a little too much). “That is the last time we’ll be watching that particular film. Between you, Roman and Remus–“

“Aw, c’mon! It’s harmless! And funny!”

Logan rolled his eyes again, but Patton could see the corner of his mouth twitching slightly as if he was fighting a smile, so Patton considered that a win in his book (although he was holding a bowl at the moment). After setting up the dishwasher, the two of them left the kitchen, still making idle chatter between them. As they passed through the living room, they both noted that Roman and Virgil had disappeared, meaning they’d finished their tasks and gone to their rooms. Patton and Logan made sure all the lights were turned off before they started making their way up the stairs themselves, Logan leading the way with Patton slightly behind him.

As they ascended, Patton’s mind flitted back to the movie night itself. It had gotten off almost without a hitch, save for a moment when Roman had flung popcorn at Virgil who’d made a snide comment about how similar Kuzco was to the princely trait…in a bad way. But Patton and Logan both quelled the quarrel quickly before it could escalate with both offending Sides grumbling to themselves but turning their attention back to the TV monitor. Again, Patton was reminded of how well he and Logan worked together. When it came to breaking up fights, Logan offered a calm but fair assessment of the disagreements and Patton would swoop in with gentle but firm admonitions about what was said and why it shouldn’t have been. Between the two of them, they made good mediators. And it made sense. As physical iterations of important figures in Thomas’ life – namely, a father and a teacher – they weren’t the authority figures in the famILY for nothing. It was for that that Patton had always seen Logan as his equal, even if Logan didn’t view him the same way.

Anyways, what had made the movie night even more enjoyable was the seating arrangement. Usually, Roman would be sitting in his bean bag chair by the ceiling-to-floor window, Virgil would be on the far-left side of the couch (when facing the TV) sitting on top with his back against the wall and socked feet on the seat cushions (no shoes allowed on the couch), and Patton sat on the other end. Usually, during movie nights, Logan would sit in his armchair that sat a little off from where the couch was, separated from everyone, but another thing he’d started doing in the last few weeks was join them on the couch, sitting next to Patton. Patton had been thrown off by that the first time Logan did it but very quickly relished it. As he and Logan had grown closer, they’d started exchanging brief moments of affection between each other – a hand on a shoulder from Logan, Patton lightly brushing past Logan in the hallway, and, now, sitting close to each other while watching movies. Practically shoulder-to-shoulder, leg-to-leg, and Patton loved it. He felt the warmth he always felt whenever he was with Logan flare up in his chest and spread all over him, and his fondness and yearning grew even more. Lately it was getting more difficult for him to stop thinking that this was all platonic, that there was something there between them, his heart continuing to hope even harder. His head would always come through though, still, and repress everything, still rationalizing all of Logan’s gestures as that of a good, close friend, nothing else. But what if, maybe…just maybe…

Patton was so deep in his thoughts, he didn’t pay attention when he’d made it to the top of the stairs, and the back of his cat hoodie got caught on the newel post.

Patton let out a choked noise as he felt his hoodie sleeves pull taut around his neck. Then a startled squeak eked out of his throat as he felt himself get sharply yanked backwards by the momentum. Alarm immediately shot through him as he felt himself hover in the air for a split second.

He was about to fall down the stairs.

Patton teetered on the edge of the top stair, flailing his arms in a poor attempt to regain balance. Then gravity took hold and Patton felt himself topple backwards.

A hand quickly grabbed his wrist and Patton felt himself get wrenched forwards before colliding heavily with someone’s body.

Patton’s face smushed into that person’s chest and he instinctively wrapped his arms around their torso, breathing heavily and shaking a little. He felt strong arms wrap around him in turn and a steady hand start rubbing broad strokes up and down his back. Patton was vaguely aware of someone speaking, but he couldn’t focus on the words through the adrenaline-fueled roar in his ears. He then felt whoever was holding him start gently patting a familiar pattern on his back. Patton recognized it as the 4-7-8 technique, and he tried to follow it as best he could while listening to the heartbeat thrumming just under his right ear. It helped somewhat, and soon Patton was feeling calmer.

He heard a familiar deep cadence float into his ear, laced with a fair amount of concern: “Patton, are you all right?”

Patton nodded into whoever’s chest it was. “Y-Yeah…I think so.” He still felt a bit shaky, but otherwise normal. As his awareness came back, Patton looked out the corner of his eye to see if he could get a clue on who it was that he was wrapped around.

He was greeted with a familiar bespectacled brain swimming in a sea of onyx.

Patton froze stock-still for a moment before slowly looking up.

Sure enough, staring back at him with a slightly gaped mouth and wide eyes was Logan.

Time seemed to stand still as the two Sides stared at each other, wrapped in each other’s arms. Patton couldn’t remember when he’d ever been in Logan’s arms like this. Never, was the answer. They were pressed so close to one another it was almost intimate. Romantic, even. He’d dreamt of this moment many times before, sure, but he never thought it would actually happen, though the circumstances could’ve been better. But now that it was happening, Patton couldn’t do anything; he was paralyzed in the moment, unable to believe that it was actually happening.

It took another second for Patton to realize something else: his face was very close to Logan’s. He was close enough to feel Logan’s breath puffing lightly against his mouth, tinged with the sharp bitterness of the iced coffee the logical Side had been sipping on all night. He could visually trace every line and angle of Logan’s facial structure, especially his jawline. Their noses were almost touching. And, most of all, he could see Logan’s eyes.

Though the Sides all looked like perfect carbon-copies of Thomas when they appeared on camera, in the Mindscape there were little differences in their appearances that allowed them to stand out in their own ways. For example, while they maintained Thomas’ brown eyes, the shade varied between each of them and their irises had flecks of their signature colour present. This meant that Patton could see shimmering lapis lazuli streaking through darkest black-brown: shooting stars falling through the deepest recesses of space down to Earth. In short, he found Logan’s eyes really pretty. And most of all, he saw the ‘something’ shine brighter in Logan’s gaze like the North Star. It looked very much like…could it be?

And their mouths were so close. So very, very close. If he wanted, Patton could get just a teeny bit closer…and he thought he could see Logan thinking the same thing–

But then, Logan leaned back, and he broke the embrace – and thus the moment – keeping Patton at arm’s length. A twinge jolted in Patton’s chest at that, but he said nothing, only continuing to stare at Logan blankly now.

Logan cleared his throat and awkwardly patted Patton’s upper arm with one hand before relinquishing his hold and stepping back. He was avoiding eye contact now, the flush in his cheeks deeper than it ever had been before.

“I-I’m glad to see that you’re alright, but do be careful next time, Patton. Good night.”

And with that blunt statement, Logan turned about face, marched quickly down the corridor and disappeared into his room with a firm shutting of his door, leaving a confused Patton gaping after him.

A few minutes later, Patton was back in his room, pacing in circles. He kept replaying the moment in his head: analyzing, reanalyzing and overanalyzing every little detail he could remember. The way Logan’s arms were wrapped around him almost protectively. How close their faces were and Logan didn’t so much as flinch back. When Patton started leaning forward, and Logan seemed to mirror him until he appeared to panic and fled. And the ‘something’…the elusive, unreadable ‘something’ that Patton couldn’t decipher, but he had a feeling he knew what it was now, and, for once, Patton believed that maybe, just maybe, there was something there after all. That Logan might actually feel the same way, and this had been his way of showing it: quiet, subtle, but there.

Patton thought back on the look on Logan’s face and how their mouths almost touched, and his face flushed. But he was smiling, too, and the warmth in his chest grew just a smidge.

So, Patton went to bed with – for once – a calm mind and an assured heart that night, and as he turned off the lights and snuggled into his blankets, he decided that, at some point, he would talk to Logan privately and alone, and confess to him, tell him how he felt about him, and hope that something good would come out of it.

*******

Patton trudged down the corridor, rubbing his face with his hand. It’d been a few days since the incident between him and Logan, and Patton hadn’t seen him since then, which meant that he hadn’t gotten a chance to talk to him. But Logan – along with Thomas and Roman – was busy with video editing, and so Patton had to wait. Which was fine, though, truth be told, Patton missed him. But he knew he was busy, they all were, and so Patton had been okay with not seeing him for a while. He could wait a little longer.

Though it was pretty late, he had felt a little peckish so he figured it wouldn’t hurt to get an almost-11pm snack (it wasn’t midnight, thus it couldn’t be a midnight snack). After making his way down the hallway as quietly as possible, Patton did the same thing walking down the stairs.

He was nearing the kitchen, still trying to decide what he wanted to munch on, when Patton heard voices. Listening carefully, Patton realized that it was Logan and Janus. He was surprised that they were talking at all, considering how things between Janus and Logan hadn’t exactly been peachy-keen, fine-and-dandy in the past. But Patton figured that maybe, just like him, Logan was trying to forge a better friendship with Janus to build a better understanding of one another and thus be able to help Thomas better. So, truthfully, Patton was rather relieved for them to be getting along quite well.

They seemed to be having a rather in-depth discussion – about what, Patton wasn’t sure; he hadn’t been listening too carefully – and Patton didn’t want to intrude, so he decided to forgo his snack and turned around to go back to his room.

But just as he did, he overheard Janus say:

“What do you consider as pros and cons of love, then, from a rational standpoint, Logan?”

Patton stilled, interest suddenly piqued. He looked back, uncertain of what to do. Usually – as the moral Side – he was against listening in on other people’s conversations without their knowledge, but…considering the topic, and the fact that he was also the center of Thomas’ emotions, he couldn’t help but be curious about what they had to say. Especially Logan. So, he decided, just this once, he’d eavesdrop just a little. He tiptoed closer until he was against the wall next to the archway into the kitchen and started listening in, making sure he was out of sight.

Janus and Logan went back and forth discussing the merits and downsides of love and affection, each giving their own take on the matter. Patton had a little trouble following them at times since they were both on equal footing in terms of having knowledge about intellectual subjects like philosophy, psychology and history, as well as possessing sophisticated levels of language and vocabulary. It was times like this when Patton felt rather stupid. Well, ‘stupid’ was a strong word. More so he wished he knew enough about these topics so he could have proper discussions on them with Logan because they were meaningful to the logical trait. Sometimes he wondered if the conversations he had with Logan weren’t stimulating enough but Logan was only engaging in them to be nice to Patton. Well, if that was the case, then at least he had Janus to talk to about stuff he liked, even if that made Patton a little sad.

Patton shook his head vigorously to make the bad thoughts go away and focused back on the debate. It seemed to be perfect timing because Janus had just asked Logan:

“So, what do you think of love, then? Do you think yourself capable of feeling such an ‘emotion’? Or are you above that?”

Patton held his breath, heart beating in anticipation of what Logan was going to say.

He heard Logan give an audible scoff. “I don’t, and I do not. Feel it, that is. I’m Logic. I don’t feel emotions. And even if I did – which I don’t – and I was capable of experiencing such a sentiment as ‘love’, I wouldn’t want to, nor ever will, with anyone. Love is messy and pointless, and nothing but trouble. It’s a complete waste of time and energy and robs all living beings, real and imaginary, of common sense. I’ve functioned well without it up until now and I don’t see it becoming a need or want in the future. And that’s the end of the discussion, Janus.”

Patton’s heart shattered in his chest; he felt like he was going to faint. He quickly sank out, having heard enough.

When he was back in his room, Patton collapsed to the floor and leaned against his bed, shaking uncontrollably. He didn’t even bother turning the light on. He felt like the world was ending, and a burning pain unlike anything he’d ever experienced was sitting sharp in his throat and chest. Staticky white noise crackled in his ears, and his hunger was replaced with stomach-churning nausea. Patton wanted to cry, but the tears wouldn’t come; they’d solidified into a glassy sheen. And he was cold. Oh, so cold. Like he was turning to ice from the inside out.

In the end, it was what he’d feared all along: Logan didn’t feel the same way and never would, because he didn’t want to. He hated everything that Patton stood for, which meant he would never reciprocate Patton’s feelings. All the times they’d spent together: baking together, Logan talking to Patton about topics that interested him, saying nice things to him…they’d all been because Logan saw him as a friend, nothing more. His head was in line for a long session of telling his heart “I told you so.”

Patton sat in the dark in heartbroken pain for a long time; he wasn’t sure how much time had passed. It could have been minutes, hours, days even, for all he knew. At some point he vaguely registered someone walking past his door, pausing for a moment and then continuing on their way. Probably someone on their way to the bathroom or something. Patton didn’t care. Nothing mattered in the face of the devastation coursing through him.

Soon, Patton felt himself shivering more from cold than distress, and his head was getting foggy with fatigue, so he literally and figuratively shook his head, pulled himself up slowly and squared his jaw, face grim and eyes teary before he crawled into his lonely, empty bed.

And as he curled up into a ball around a hollow ache in his chest, Patton reminded himself of the same conclusion he’d been coming to for weeks: it didn’t mean anything. Nothing that Logan ever said or did to him had meant anything meaningful, and that was that.

No matter how much it hurt.

*******

Over the next few weeks, things in the Mindscape were as they’d always been, but with some marked differences. Patton didn’t completely avoid or ignore Logan, nor shut himself up in his room or abandon his duties, but he wasn’t as friendly or affectionate either. If Logan asked him a question or for his opinion on something, he’d answer politely and to the point, and when all the Sides were together, he’d make a comment every so often so as not to rouse too much suspicion, but in general he kept to himself and wasn’t the usual happy-pappy father figure figment.

Patton continued to keep the Mindscape in tip-top shape and oversee that the other Sides didn’t burn themselves out, but it was as though the light in his eyes had dimmed. In truth, he was breaking on the inside, but like he’d done before, even though he knew he shouldn’t, he was heavily repressing everything. But what else could he do? It was his most trusted defense mechanism, as unhealthy as it was, and it was easier to indulge in comfortable bad habits than actively pursue better outlets. Misery came easily to Patton, anyway; he was no stranger to it. And because he didn’t want to confront the problem, he was going to try and drag it out for as long as he could till the others took notice.

And he was correct; it wasn’t long before the other Light Sides were aware that something was off about their resident dad. But whenever they tried to broach the topic with Patton, he would skirt it and divert and do just about anything but talk about what was bothering him. They soon got the hint and decided to try and show support in smaller, less pushy ways.

Whenever Virgil hung out with Patton – usually by sitting together on the couch and doing their own thing like Patton watching TV or knitting and Virgil listening to music and scrolling through his phone – the anxious Side started acting more affectionate than he usually did by either leaning against Patton or laying along the couch with his head on Patton’s lap, hoping this provided Patton with some comfort to ease his sadness. Patton seemed to respond positively by leaning back against Virgil or stroking a hand through Virgil’s hair, which pleased Virgil a little, but the unhappy look in Patton’s eyes still lingered, and so Virgil still internally freaked out over Patton’s changed behaviour.

During Roman and Patton’s times spent together, the creative Side also began increasing the amount of physical touch he would usually share with Patton such as touching shoulders when sitting side by side at the coffee table while brainstorming on new video ideas, brief hand touches on Patton’s back when they were moving around each other while preparing meals, and even giving him longer hugs when saying goodnight before going to bed or goodbye before he left on excursions into the Imagination with promises to be safe and careful. And, just like with Virgil, Patton seemed receptive to Roman’s increased acts of affection, even giving tiny smiles which Roman considered a personal triumph, but Patton would then quickly revert back to his passive, lethargic state, and Roman would go back to continually wondering worriedly on what had his beloved Padre so down.

Logan was the only one not acting any different. He was still talking to Patton normally like asking him questions or how his day was going and otherwise interacting with him as usual. If there was any change at all, it was that he seemed to pick up on Patton’s low mood and distant behaviour and had, in turn, started giving him space and limiting physical touch like before. He would also gaze at Patton with an unreadable expression on his face, giving Patton the feeling more times than not like he was being X-rayed, but Patton would limit his eye contact with Logan for no more than a few seconds at a time when he was being addressed to and then break it. He had to; as the phrase rings true, the eyes were the windows into the soul, and Patton could never let Logan know what he was really feeling, being the emotional Side as he was. So, he avoided looking directly at Logan and kept his distance.

It was both relief and torture for Patton; because on one hand he was thankful that Logan was staying away because then it was easier for him to keep Logan at arm’s length and shove his crush down into the deep recesses of his heart, but on the other hand Patton missed the touches he’d grown used to in the weeks where he and Logan had been close to one another, and he missed the soft gaze and smile that Logan seemed to reserve for him and him alone. He missed it all so much his whole body would literally ache all over with the longing. But he gritted his teeth and inwardly scolded himself to get a grip; he’d heard Logan loud and clear on what he truly thought about love. His opinion on it was low and scornful, so it was for the best that Patton worked on getting rid of his crush, maintaining strict ‘friend status’ with Logan and moving forward without looking back.

But, gosh, did it hurt.

As a month of this passed, Patton grew more distant and miserable with each passing day, and everyone else worried both about and for him. But they kept mum on the subject while around Patton and continued about their business, while an unspoken hope built up between them all that soon the fatherly trait would open up about the source of his distress and they would be able to help him and things would hopefully go back to normal.

It came to a head one evening during one of their movie nights.

All four of them were, once again, in the common room and sitting in their usual places: Roman in his beanbag chair, Virgil on top of the couch on the end closest to Roman, and Patton and Logan sitting a ways from the emo trait on the other side of the couch and side by side. Though Patton – as he had been doing – left a decent amount of space between the two of them so they weren’t touching. If Logan noticed, he said nothing.

The movie started – Robin Hood, this time – but Patton barely paid attention as it went on. All he could think about was how close Logan was to him, and yet so far. During the scenes where Robin Hood and Maid Marian were together and being sweet and romantic with one another, Patton started reminiscing about all the times when he and Logan would be sitting close together on the couch, making body contact and just enjoying each other’s warmth and presence. His body ached even more, yearning for the physicality they used to have, but the reminder of the cold, hard truth he’d heard come from Logan’s lips that fateful night – which seemed like a lifetime ago now – pierced his heart. So, he sat there in keen sorrow, no longer watching the movie.

Patton was so distracted by his thoughts, he didn’t notice Logan look at him for a moment then slowly slide down the couch until they were almost touching. Then the logical Side pressed himself against Patton.

Patton froze like petrified wood, heat from the touch coursing through his body like wildfire. He turned to stare at Logan, shocked beyond comprehension.

Logan gave Patton a small, gentle smile, and then he reached out a hand and placed it on Patton’s knee.

The added touch now had Patton feeling like he was being electrocuted, and his head and heart couldn’t comprehend what was happening. What was Logan doing? WHY was he doing this?

Patton stood up so abruptly he knocked his legs into the coffee table, which in turn caused the drink glasses and snack bowls to get knocked over. The Sides jumped and stared in shock at Patton’s strange behaviour. Logan was looking especially perplexed at the moral Side’s reaction.

Patton started to shake, and he clenched his hands into fists and snapped his eyes shut. With a choked gasp, he quickly sank out from the common room.

The Sides stared at the spot where Patton had just been and then at each other, bewildered as to what had happened. The spilled contents of their drinks dripped over the edges of the coffee table and popcorn littered the carpet, the movie forgotten in the background.

*******

Patton rose up in his room, in distress and confusion. He took a few shaky breaths, then unexpectedly turned and kicked at his bedside table, stumbling and nearly falling backwards from the momentum. The burning feeling in his esophagus from the night he heard Logan’s confession had returned, and it was hurting more than ever now. He felt like he couldn’t breathe properly.

He raised his hands up to his neck and felt his cat hoodie, more constricting than comforting now. Patton paused for a moment, then – in a sudden fit – he viciously untied it from around his neck, crumpled it up into a ball and hurled it away from him, the reminder that it was the first gift Logan had ever given him a dagger in his chest.

His confusion was rising, as was his anger. Was this some kind of cruel joke? Was Logan playing with him? WHY would he say that he doesn’t believe in love and thinks it’s a waste of time and energy, and THEN suddenly act like the way he did during the movie? Like he did before when they were becoming better friends? When they were becoming closer?

Patton was shaking more than before, and he felt the strong urge to throw more things, or even break something. But he knew that that wouldn’t solve anything. He closed his eyes again and tried to follow the 4-7-8 breathing technique. But then he was reminded that it was Logan who had taught all of them that, and the pain in his heart struck again.

A distressed wail tore itself out of his throat, and Patton gripped his hair tightly with both hands, tears beginning to push behind his eyelids. He then decided to just go for slow, even breaths as best as he could, no counting, just doing. His breathing stuttered but he kept trying. He just wanted to calm down. He wanted to show the others that there was nothing wrong. That he was fine.

As he was doing all this, Patton didn’t hear the woosh that sounded off in his room, signaling that a Side had risen up in his space. He didn’t hear the slow, cautious footsteps approaching him as he stood in the middle of his room trying to get himself under control, and it wasn’t until he felt two gentle hands gripping his forearms that he reacted.

Patton’s eyes opened to see that it was Logan, looking at him with a genuinely worried look on his face. Patton froze for a second, then jumped back from him, wrenching himself out of Logan’s grip.

“What are you doing?” he hissed, glaring at Logan.

Logan blinked at him in confusion. “I…I’m trying to provide comfort,” he finally said. “I noticed you were in distress and I remembered that physical touch usually helps to ground you, so I was–“

Patton barked out a derisive laugh so unlike him that Logan immediately fell silent.

“Since when do you care enough about me to notice anything?” Patton snapped. He was trying to push everything down. He really was. At the back of his head, he knew lashing out at Logan without giving him context wasn’t fair. But his pain was reaching a breaking point, and his anger licked at his tongue.

Logan stared, mouth slightly open. He didn’t understand what was happening, why Patton was acting this way. He’d never seen the moral Side look so angry, and hurt, and…heartbroken.

“What do you mean, Patton? Of course, I care about you. Why else would I try–“

“BECAUSE YOU DON’T LOVE ME THE WAY I LOVE YOU!”

A deathly silence filled the room, and the two Sides stared at each other in shock: Logan at what Patton had said, and Patton at what he’d said, what he’d confessed. His hands were covering his mouth and his eyes were wide with horror.

Logan took a step towards Patton, and Patton responded by taking several steps backwards until his back painfully hit a wall behind him. He dipped his head, avoiding eye contact, and dropped his shaky hands from his mouth to curl them into fists again by his sides. He couldn’t do this. He couldn’t be around Logan right now, be close to him right now, have him touch him right now.

Not when it didn’t mean anything.

Logan stayed where he was, not wanting to make Patton any more uncomfortable or upset than he already was. The logical Side was even more confused now, and worried, watching Patton grow more and more distraught. What happened? What could he do? What was Patton talking about?

“Patton, I – I don’t understa– I do love you –“

“No.”

Logan stopped. Even though Patton said only a single word, it seemed to carry all the pain and sorrow of the world, and it made Logan’s heart figuratively crack. He watched Patton dip his head further, pain etching the fatherly Side’s face and looking on the brink of emotional collapse.

Patton’s head was screaming at him to not say any more, that he’d say too much, that he’d said too much already, to stop. But his heart, knowing that he had nothing more to lose (and what was a little more pain, anyway), persisted, and, after swallowing hard – his throat raw from screaming at the top of his lungs moments before – he willed his mouth to say the words that in better circumstances would have sounded sweet and lovely, but now pricked his tongue like bitter barbs.

“I – I know that you do love and care about me…as a friend. But… I… I love you more than that. So, the fact that you don’t feel the same way makes it hurt so much I can’t stand it.”

There. He’d finally said it. And somehow he felt so much worse than he did before. Patton’s eyes finally relented and hot tears spilled down his cheeks onto the floor, his sobs locked up in his throat.

Patton wrapped his arms around himself to try to stop himself trembling (to no avail) and curled into himself a little. Maybe if he tried hard enough, he’d be able to disappear into himself. Away from here. Away from Logan.

As Patton wept silently, Logan still stood where he was, staring at Patton, in shock from the confession. He ran both hands through his hair before grabbing at and gripping his tie tight and twisting it in agitation, stopping short of strangling himself. He couldn’t stand to see Patton so broken and unhappy, but he still didn’t understand what brought all this on, and what did Patton mean by what he said?

“Patton…what…what do you mean, ‘I don’t feel the same way’?”

Patton doubled over further at the question, and felt like he could crumble at any moment. But Logan deserved an explanation. So, he opened his mouth to deliver his second confession, feeling as though the words were actually cutting his tongue.

“I overheard you and Janus talking in the kitchen. I – I know I shouldn’t’ve eavesdropped, but you were talking about love, and affection, th-things that represent who I am, and then…when Janus – Janus asked you wh-what you thought about love…you said – you – you said –“

His voice was breaking. As was his heart. Patton couldn’t go on. But he didn’t need to. Logan was smart. He had a good memory. He would be able to remember what he said that night.

So, there. Now Logan knew everything.

Patton let out a heartbroken wail and finally gave in to his tears. He turned his body sideways so he was leaning against the wall, leaning away from the sight of Logan, whom he didn’t want to see whatever look was on his face – Pity? Disgust? Derision? – and he leaned his head against the wall, sobbing his heart out. Patton was certain he was staining the wall with his tears, and he almost would be impressed that he wasn’t collapsed onto the floor – the wall supporting his weight fully – if he wasn’t wallowing so heavily in grief.

So consumed in his breakdown, Patton didn’t see the look that crossed Logan’s face through a myriad of emotions at his declaration: first confusion, then realization, then horror, then guilt wrapped up in a hot pocket of shame, and, lastly, dismay upon finally knowing why Patton was falling apart, his behaviour over the last few weeks suddenly making sense.

A few long moments passed in silence, with only Patton’s staccato sobs punctuating the air with his sadness, and Logan looked at the moral Side with wide eyes, a partially open mouth, and his heart sitting stone-heavy in his chest.

Then, slowly, Logan approached Patton, who was still leaning against the wall and sounding like he was choking on his tears, sharply sucking in air as though his lungs were literally starving for oxygen.

Once he was close enough, Logan let go of his tie – now resembling a crushed black-and-blue churro – and slowly reached out his hands and placed them on Patton’s upper arms. Patton gasped at the touch and tried to pull away, but Logan tightened his grip and pulled Patton towards him. He carefully folded the emotional trait against himself before wrapping his arms around Patton in a hug.

Patton froze, shocked by the gesture. Before all of this, even though Patton always gave Logan one of his famous Patton-ted bear hugs, Logan had only recently reached the phase of reciprocating by patting Patton’s back as he kept one hand on him when before he didn’t even so much as want an arm around his shoulders. Logan had never, ever given a proper, two-armed hug, to anyone. Until now.

Patton wanted to pull away again, but the crying had sapped a good amount of his energy, and his slight touch starvation magnetized him to Logan’s body, to the warmth he’d missed so much and for so long. So, he didn’t pull away, but he didn’t reciprocate either. Patton just stood listlessly in Logan’s embrace, his arms by his sides, sniffling into Logan’s shoulder. He knew still that Logan was only doing this to be a good friend. Nothing more, nothing less.

Logan adjusted his position slightly so that Patton fit better in his arms and tightened his hold on the dad figment a smidge, hoping his rare display of affection was conveying all the comfort and care that he could possibly muster to the heartbroken loving Side.

“Patton…I’m so sorry.” Logan’s voice was low and soft, and his usually measured tone was tinged with something emotional, though Patton wasn’t mentally present to pay attention to what it was.

Patton hiccupped on a sob, his tears showing no signs of relenting any time soon. “What are you sorry for?” he croaked out. “I’m the one who’s sorry for eavesdropping on a conversation that wasn’t my business to butt into, and for being an idiot by developing a crush on you that would never be recipro–“

Patton didn’t get to finish his sentence, because as he was talking, Logan turned his own face a bit and placed a chaste kiss on Patton’s cheek.

Patton was so shocked he instantly stopped crying. He pulled back a tiny bit to gape at Logan, his whole system shutting down like a laptop with a dead battery. He blinked owlishly at the rational figment, leftover stray tears dribbling down the sides of his face from the action. He tried to say something, but his voice seemed to have disappeared on him.

That was when Patton really looked at Logan properly, and he saw the look on Logan’s face. It was one that was a mixture of guilt, remorse and sadness, but Patton also noticed that the little ‘something’ was back, lurking in the background of Logan’s eyes.

As they looked at each other, Logan raised a hand to cradle the side of Patton’s face, and Patton let out the tiniest of squeaks. Logan did nothing else for a moment, allowing Patton’s cheek to warm up his hand as it continued to cup Patton’s face. Then he started moving his thumb up and down Patton’s cheek in a move that was almost achingly tender and loving, smearing half-dried tear tracks.

Still staring at him in shock, Patton’s own hand subconsciously lifted up towards Logan’s. His fingertips barely brushed against the back of Logan’s hand, a feather-light touch, but Patton saw the ‘something’ flash more conspicuously in Logan’s eyes, and for a second Patton thought he knew what it was, but his reticence and uncertainty stopped him from looking further into it, and before he knew it, it had receded back into the background just as fast.

On his own end, Logan saw the light in Patton’s eyes – the one he’d seen burn bright when they’d spent time together, and that had snuffed almost out of existence during their separation – flicker brighter for a second before dimming down again quickly.

Logan gave Patton a small sad smile and shook his head slightly.

“You’re not an idiot, Patton,” he murmured quietly. “Far from it, actually.”

Patton still didn’t say anything. He could only stare as his hand started to carefully rest on top of Logan’s; not enough to provide weight, but enough that the amount of skin contact was significant. He watched as Logan’s smile faded and he broke eye contact to look downwards, a tiny sigh escaping through his nose.

“If anything, I am the idiot in this scenario,” he muttered, almost as if in shame and guilt.

Patton blinked in confusion. “What…what do you mean?” he asked, voice still strained from crying.

Logan removed his hand from Patton’s face then and pulled back, breaking the hug. Patton almost let out a whine from the loss of warmth but it stayed locked up in his throat. But it wasn’t for very long because Logan then took both of Patton’s hands in his and started pulling him towards Patton’s bed, all with a gentleness that made Patton want to start crying all over again. They both sat down on the edge and looked at each other, still holding hands and knees brushing against each other.

Both were silent: Patton because he was still processing what was happening and wondering what Logan was doing, and Logan because he was choosing his words carefully, because he had things that he needed to say.

It took awhile for Logan to say anything; whenever he opened his mouth, he would close it again shortly after, and the pattern continued a few more times. He was unusually agitated, not his typical calm and composed self, and he periodically squeezed Patton’s hands, though whether because he was trying to lend comfort to Patton or if it was a way to ground himself, Patton wasn’t sure. Admittedly, he wasn’t sure about a lot of things at the moment.

Finally, Logan took a slow, deep breath, and then said in an almost-normal voice: “There’s something I need to tell you, Patton, and it’s not a miniscule amount, but it needs to be said. Because it’s come to my attention that I’ve wrought immeasurable pain upon you, hereby damaging our relationship, and I need to make things right. So, all I ask of you, for now, is for you to listen to what I have to say and not say anything until I’m finished. Will you do that, for me?”

All Patton could do was wordlessly nod, watching and waiting, but (mostly) ready for what Logan had to say.

Logan nodded in return, and his grip on Patton’s hands tightened. Patton squeezed back, hoping it would help steady Logan, seeing vexation saturate his posture.

Logan took one more cleansing breath, then he locked eyes with Patton and, without looking away, stated stiltedly, hesitantly, almost fearfully even: “The fact of the matter is, Patton…is that I, Logan…h-hold romantic sentiments for you.”

Patton’s jaw dropped. Logan…liked him? As well? But…how? When? Did he not say anything because he’d been scared of being rejected? Why was he telling Patton this now? Patton’s head was a buzzing beehive of questions, but he didn’t have time to wonder over this new revelation because Logan was looking at him expectantly (and a little nervously), and Patton remembered his promise to let Logan talk until he’d said all that he wanted to say. So, he closed his mouth and motioned his head jerkily towards Logan to indicate for him to continue.

Logan nodded in thanks, then swallowed and cleared his throat so he could keep talking. “I suppose I should start from the beginning. It began some time after the aftermath of the wedding…”

*******

Logan couldn’t recall when it began, nor could he pinpoint the exact moment when it hit him. It had been that gradual. But he knew indubitably what had been the catalyst.

After the wedding/callback debacle, the path to reconciliation had been slow, and when it eventually happened an obscene but necessary amount of talking took place, with shout matches, blame games and crying fits interspersed throughout. But, finally, all the Sides resolved their issues stemming from that conflict and were, more or less, on good terms again. There was shared agreement that they didn’t want anything like what had happened to happen again, and Logan had retired to his room to sit down at his desk and ruminate about what the next step was.

In order to make sure that this recent conflict would not repeat itself in the future, he needed to come up with a fool-proof prevention plan. And Logan was good at making plans; he’d curated schedules for both Thomas and the others for years – even though they weren’t always followed – and plans were important because they provided a foundation in which to help set objectives and achieve goals. He determined that poor communication and failure to understand others’ perspectives was part of what had derailed the conversation between Thomas, Patton and Roman, which ended up having a ripple effect over everyone else, himself included. So, Logan decided that the goal to ensure the decreased likelihood of another catastrophe such as what had transpired was to improve his relations with his fellow Sides by getting to know them better.

He went over each of his relationships with the other Light Sides in his head. Despite a rocky start, he was probably on the best terms with Virgil because of their left-brain tendencies so there was likely little strife to smooth over there. Roman…although they often clashed with one another, the creative and logical Sides did share a few commonalities, thus establishing some level of respect between them. In fact, Roman surprised Logan by coming to him one night and apologizing for the way he’d blown off Logan during the video, and Logan – after re-watching the video and coming to a better understanding of what Roman struggled with – had forgiven him, eliciting a promise from the prince to try to refrain from engaging in that type of behaviour again, while assuring Roman that Thomas still, indeed, loved and needed him and that, as Creativity, he was still an invaluable and inimitable member of their family.

That left Patton, whom Logan had always had the most strenuous relationship with for most of Thomas’ existence. It wasn’t that he hated the emotional trait; no, far from it. It was just that they were so different from each other, complete opposites in everything from their personalities to their opinions on various subjects. (He was ready and willing to debate Patton till the day Thomas died that pineapple did not belong on pizza.) That’s just how it was: the mind versus the heart.

But Logan, after giving it thorough thought, came to the understanding that, for Thomas to have an easier time navigating through life, a more harmonious union between the Sides would be optimal. So, considering their relationship, and seeing how Patton had been after the fallout, Logan decided to try and strengthen his ties to Patton by being a better friend.

Before he did anything, Logan first observed the father figure facet to see what made him ‘tick’. He wrote down a list of Patton’s likes and dislikes and then sat down and did research on the moral Side’s favourite interests so that he would have at least a basic working knowledge on them before conversing with Patton. Then, remembering a time when Thomas had stayed up late reading up on something called ‘love languages’, Logan had gone to the ‘Miscellaneous Subjects’ section of his own personal library to look up said topic, and he’d come to the conclusion that Patton’s primary love language was definitely quality time, so his last step was to pay attention to what Patton did during the week, and then made a mental note to make an effort to spend time with Patton during his recreational activities.

When he felt that he was sufficiently prepared, Logan initiated his plan.

He started out small by trying to be less condescending and dismissive like he used to be before, and he did this by making an effort to smile and laugh at Patton’s dad jokes and puns and asking him about topics he liked. He also made sure to intersperse a thoughtful compliment here and there whenever Patton showcased a strength of his; he’d taken note that Patton tended to downplay his accomplishments or even downright talk himself down, something that pricked Logan’s chest unpleasantly so he’d figured a few words of affirmation here and there would help slowly boost the moral Side’s morale and confidence. Then he moved on to involving Patton more in important tasks like looking over script drafts and listening to and considering his input, and finally he began initiating regular one-on-one quality time with the dad trait by doing activities like cooking and baking or even just sitting quietly together in the common room and chatting.

To his surprise, Logan found that he actually rather enjoyed Patton’s company and conversation; the moral Side proved to be rather adept at keeping discourse flowing smoothly, and he provided a different view on a lot of things that Logan himself wouldn’t have known to think about until he did. Logan was also surprised at how well they worked together; whether it was discussing one of Thomas’ dilemmas or preparing a meal, Patton and Logan bounced off each other almost without fault, and Logan didn’t know why he never thought to reach out to Patton before.

As time went on and they grew closer, Logan felt himself growing fonder of Patton and his ways. He was always learning something new about the moral Side every day, and he realized how invaluable Patton was to not only Thomas but also their little famILY, and how well he took care of everyone and the Mindscape. Logan saw how Patton genuinely tried to see the best in everyone, even those whom he wasn’t on good terms with; how, despite feeling immeasurable guilt when he messed up, he tried to forgive himself and move on, trusting on the lessons he learned along the way, always promising to be and do better, and always for Thomas; how he wanted nothing but happiness and safety for everyone he loved and was willing to do just about anything to ensure that. Patton was more than just morality; he was the metaphorical glue that kept them all together. And Logan didn’t realize how much gratitude and respect he felt for Patton until then. Even though Patton’s puns and persistently positive persona still got on his nerves sometimes, Logan found himself seeking out the moral Side’s presence more and more, as well as incorporating small displays of affection such as shoulder touches, hand brushes and even just sitting close to each other during movie night when before he’d loathed to even think about, let alone do. It surprised him how easy it was to do so, and that he actually didn’t mind it.

Then the night when Logan stopped Patton from falling down the stairs and they ended up in that compromising position, Logan, feeling stunned, had looked down at Patton and felt his breath come to a halt in his lungs. With Patton staring back up at him, Logan noticed little details he’d never paid attention to before: how Patton’s hair was wavier than his own sensibly-styled strands; that there was a small smattering of freckles across Patton’s nose that reminded Logan of the Pleiades cluster, one of his favourite constellations; how Patton’s breath was scented with the mellowest hint of vanilla and cinnamon from the Snickerdoodles he’d been munching on during the movie night; and, most of all, there was a light in his eyes – warm chocolate dotted with sparkling aquamarine: baby blue sugar crystals floating in cocoa frosting – a light that Logan had seen when they were alone together, when he said something that made Patton joyful or excited, when they were in physical contact with one another, like now as they stood in each other’s arms with their faces dangerously close to each other. A light that shone bright whenever Patton watched a heartfelt love scene or felt Thomas’ own yearning towards someone, and was now burning like a fireplace in late fall as Patton gazed into Logan’s eyes.

And Logan had felt a surge then that he’d never felt before and almost gave in to, as he found himself leaning closer towards Patton’s face (and couldn’t help but notice Patton doing the same thing). And he’d wanted to. He’d really wanted to. But it was something that he was not familiar with, and…truthfully…it freaked him out. So, he’d backed out of it and played it off as nonchalantly as he could hope, but inwardly he’d been shaken.

When he returned to his room, Logan was unable to concentrate on his work. He paced around his room and replayed the moment over and over in his head: analyzing, reanalyzing and overanalyzing not only his actions, but Patton’s as well. Every little detail. Wondering if…what if–

But it couldn’t be. Patton couldn’t possibly feel that way for him…could he? If the way he’d been responding to Logan’s actions and affections was any indication, it was possible. But would he want someone like Logan? Logan was logic. Reason, facts and knowledge. He didn’t do emotions. Especially not with something like love. So what if he wanted to spend more of his waking hours with Patton than doing his own work now? So what if he felt happy and listened to when in the moral Side’s company and felt his absence keenly when they retired for the night? So what if all he wanted to do was to keep making Patton smile and laugh so he could watch his face light up like the rising sun and see that soft, loving look that he seemed to reserve for Logan and only Logan–

Logan stopped dead in his tracks, the realization hitting him like a freight train traveling at astronomical speeds.

He loved Patton. He was in love with Patton.

And that thought scared him out of his wits. Not only of the fact, but also of the possibility that if Patton ever knew how Logan really felt about him, he wouldn’t feel the same way. Especially not after the way Logan had treated Patton in the past, with how he’d ridiculed the moral Side’s lighthearted jokes and puns and thought him childish, incompetent and irrelevant simply because he was emotions. Knowing better now made Logan’s chest twinge from guilt and shame.

The logical Side was caught in an internal battle then, between his head listing out the ways in which Logan had worked to better his treatment of Patton, how well they were getting along these days and how Patton had not refused any of the little acts of kindness Logan had shown him so it wasn’t unreasonable to think that a relationship between them was possible, and his heart just screaming bloody murder at full volume because he’d never known this feeling before and it was unfamiliar and disorientating and scary and…Logan had absolutely no idea what to do.

He went to bed that night with an overactive mind and an uncertain heart.

The next few days after the incident between Patton and him were a very busy time then for Thomas and the Sides – with him, Roman and Virgil working overtime – so Logan didn’t have any free time to dwell on Patton and what had happened, which he was grateful for since ruminating on the issue sent his system into overdrive. He did miss his presence a bit, though, since very little socializing took place during crunch-time for videos.

Toward the end of that crazy period, when he finally finished all the work he’d been doing, Logan decided to go to the kitchen to fix himself some toast with Crofter’s as a reward, despite the late hour. He’d run into Janus then, who’d come into the kitchen to fix himself some chamomile tea to help him relax. Though Logan and Janus were still on rather precarious footing, they were able to be civil with one another and even indulged in proper debates from time to time, so they greeted each other cordially and made chit-chat as they fixed their various snacks and then sat at the kitchen table to consume them and continue talking.

In the middle of their conversation, Janus brought up the ill-fated subject Logan had been avoiding. The snake-like Side had noticed Logan and Patton’s interactions over the last few weeks and was genuinely interested in knowing more, with a heaping helping of teasing added in for good measure. Feeling uncomfortable, Logan skirted the topic, and Janus smoothly turned the conversation into a debate then, focusing on the benefits and drawbacks of love, affection and relationships. The debate didn’t get too heated, fortunately, but Logan’s discomfort grew as the various examples Janus provided reminded him of Patton, and it was clear that Janus was grilling Logan about his infatuation with the moral Side.

When Janus posed the question of what he, Logan, personally thought and believed of love and if he was capable of it, for a brief moment Logan – irritated at the perceived interrogation – reverted back to his old ways out of defense and coldly proclaimed that, as the logical Side, he had no use for emotions, that love was more trouble than it was worth, and he didn’t feel anything as ‘icky’ as affection anyway, nor would he ever feel something as such for anyone.

The second Logan said all that, he immediately felt guilty and regretful, knowing it was all a big, bald-faced falsehood. Because none of it was true. Not anymore. And judging by the look on Janus’ face, he knew it, too.

(Being the Side of deception, Janus was always able to tell when anyone was lying, and Logan’s lie just then tasted like the Crofter’s on Logan’s toast had gone bitter and moldy.)

That was the moment – unbeknownst to them at the time – when Patton had stopped listening to what they were saying and fled to his room, not hearing the rest of the conversation-turned-debate-turned-grilling-then-turned-back-to-conversation.

After trying to out-stare Janus, who didn’t say a single word, Logan gave up. He heaved a heavy sigh and admitted that he hadn’t meant any of what he’d said. That he did love Patton. And that…he was scared. He was really scared of messing things up if he confessed. That he would only hurt Patton again…like he used to…or more. His pin-straight posture slumped just the slightest, and Logan looked down at the surface of the kitchen table, stewing in his romantic quandary.

As he did, Janus looked at Logan, a sympathetic expression on his scaled face at the logical Side’s confession and rare display of vulnerability. There had been nothing but truth in those words now: pure mountain spring water cascading over his forked tongue. Even though Janus wasn’t good friends with Logan, he could appreciate and admire when someone was open about something they feared or were insecure about, especially considering that Logan was notorious for seeming untouchable and impervious to all things outside his realm of understanding and would never admit anything that resembled or represented weakness to him.

Logan’s look of fear and uncertainty strongly reminded Janus of the day when he revealed his name to Thomas. It hadn’t been something that he’d planned to do, but, upon realizing that Thomas was taking a leap of faith to trust him, impulsively decided to extend an olive branch back (but also to pettily put the prince in his place for questioning Janus’ intentions) by giving Thomas something that he’d held close to his chest for years, something of great importance, no matter how much it scared him. In the end, the spontaneous act paid off, giving Janus what he’d always wanted: acceptance by Thomas and a seat at the table, but it unwittingly left a field of destruction in his wake.

Janus winced inwardly; April 13th would forever remain a day of infamy for all of the Sides, even him, and though things had gone back to normal (and become even better in some cases), the deceitful Side still couldn’t help feeling flashes of guilt whenever the memory of that day floated into his mind.

Coming back to the present, Janus observed Logan with a thoughtful slit eye, who was leaning on the kitchen table with his arms crossed, head bowed slightly and face twisted in internal conflict, eyes staring into the wood as if hoping that it held all the answers he was looking for, almost-finished toast forgotten on the side.

Then, slowly, Janus took off the glove on his right hand and reached out and tentatively placed it on one of Logan’s forearms.

Logan looked up at Janus, blinking in surprise at the physical gesture.

Janus gave him a small half-smile and squeezed his arm briefly, saying – while looking straight (hah) into his eyes – that he firmly believed that Logan had changed for the better, that he knew what to do, and that everything would be all right.

Remembering what Janus had done on ‘that’ day and the significance, Logan knew Janus was telling the truth, and he gave the Side of self-preservation a genuine smile before thanking him.

With that, the two Sides decided to retire for the night. Logan offered to wash out Janus’ cup which Janus accepted with gratitude, and, after bidding goodnight (and offering one last word of reassurance, plus a dash of sarcasm for good measure), sank out of the kitchen.

Logan finished the rest of his toast in two bites and went to rinse the plate and cup before placing them in the dishwasher while still chewing. Then he turned the lights off in the kitchen and left for his bedroom the old-fashioned way, thinking over what Janus had said to him.

As he passed by Patton’s door, Logan stopped briefly and looked at it, almost as if he could see through it, a soft expression coming over his face. He thought about sticking his head in to say something to Patton, or even just saying goodnight, but he noticed the lights were off so it was likely that Patton was asleep already, so he decided to leave him be. He gave the door one last fond look before he finally went to his room.

By the time Logan closed his bedroom door and locked it with a wave of his hand, he’d made the decision that, at some point, he would talk to Patton privately and alone, and confess to him, tell him how he felt about him, and hope that something good would come out of it.

But shortly after that, Logan noticed Patton’s low mood and distance. He thought that maybe the busy week had tired and stressed everyone out, including Patton, which was why he was acting the way that he was. Feeling worried, he’d wanted to reach out to him, but Logan had learned from experience that pushing Patton into talking when he wasn’t ready would cause him to retreat even further into himself, so he decided to give the moral Side some space and let him talk about what was bothering him on his own time. But Logan still couldn’t help himself from gazing at Patton every so often, and feeling a tiny bit of envy when Virgil and Roman showed affection toward Patton as a sign of unspoken support and Patton responded positively but when he tried to do the same Patton would either move away from him or not react.

Logan couldn’t understand it; what had happened? Why was Patton avoiding him? Why had he rescinded physical touch with Logan while allowing the others to still do so? Did he do something wrong? The lack of answers and Patton’s growing distance and distress was driving Logan mad, and he hoped that a swift resolution was on the horizon.

Which brought them to tonight: the famILY movie night. Patton, still acting aloof and stiff, had maintained his distance from the logical Side even as they sat in their usual movie-viewing places on the couch. If Logan was being honest with himself, he was feeling a little bereft of the physical contact they used to have before. But he didn’t do anything so to respect Patton’s wishes and tried to focus on the movie, with little success. He paid more attention to the moral Side instead.

Logan noticed that Patton seemed to grow even more unhappy as the movie progressed, and his own worry grew, along with his dismay at seeing the usually happy Side so down, seeing how the light that was usually in his eyes was dim and almost snuffed out and wanting desperately to do something.

So, Logan decided to forgo his plan of giving Patton space and moved in to provide physical comfort, thinking it would help and that maybe Patton would react favourably. At first, he thought he’d done the right thing, but then Patton had jumped up and fled to his room, leaving Logan, Roman and Virgil aghast and confused as to what had happened.

Logan volunteered to go after Patton and sank out, leaving Roman and Virgil to clean up the drink and snack spills and putting movie night on hold. He arrived in Patton’s room to find Patton in an acute state of distress. Logan’s heart twinged when he noticed that Patton had thrown his cat hoodie off of his shoulders onto the floor, the first ever gift he’d given to Patton in their metaphysical lives, he realized. He tried to approach the dad trait in order to comfort and calm him down, only for Patton to push him away and scream that he loved Logan but was heartbroken by the fact that Logan didn’t feel the same way for him because of what he’d said to Janus in the kitchen a few nights ago before breaking down.

Logan then came to the horrible realization that Patton had come to the kitchen that night, overheard him and Janus talking and listened till the point when Logan said all the false claims about love that he ‘believed in’ to Janus, hereby breaking his figurative heart and leaving without hearing the rest of Logan’s confession. Logan felt as though he’d been physically struck, the horror and distress of his verbal misstep crashing over him in a bruising tidal wave. His own heart felt like it had shattered, too, but not for the same reason as Patton.

Because, despite his hopes and attempts, his worst fears had come true.

Logan had managed to hurt Patton.

Again.

Badly.

Unwittingly, but still.

*******

At the end of Logan’s story, Patton was still as a statue, stunned by what he’d been told. His mouth was slightly ajar, eyes wide with bewilderment. But they were worried as well, because now that Logan had finished, he didn’t look like he’d had a weight lifted off of him after confessing. In fact, he looked more defeated, exhausted, sad even.

Logan, shoulders slumped, took a deep shaky breath and looked down at his and Patton’s hands, still laced together. “This is what I was afraid of,” he murmured quietly, voice low and mournful. “Why I hesitated to fully act on my feelings. Because after everything we’ve gone through, the last thing I wanted to do was hurt you again. But I have. Tonight was the result of that. In the end, despite all my best efforts, I haven’t really changed. I’m still the same callous, cold Logic that I’ve been for so long.”

Logan’s eyes started brimming with tears, and he turned his head away to try to blink them away, but a few still managed to trickle down the sides of his face. He brought up a trembling hand to wipe them away and stifled a sob. He suspected that Patton’s room was starting to affect him, but he didn’t care. He couldn’t afford to not care, not when Patton deserved to hear what needed to be said. He owed him so much; it was the least he could do.

His voice shaking slightly, and looking away from the Side of his affections, Logan continued: “What I’ve said and done is proof that I do not deserve you, or vice versa. With as wonderful and kind as you are, you deserve someone just as good, if not better. Not someone like me. Because no matter how much I love you, love you so much it hurts, in both a good and bad way which I never thought possible, no matter how happy I feel whenever I’m even just simply around you and how you make me better, want to be better, I’ll always fall back into my old ways. I’ll never get better, be better. I’ll always continue to hurt you. I–“

At that point, Logan’s hands – that were back to being clasped in Patton’s - were squeezed so hard it almost hurt. Logan immediately broke off talking and he turned his head and looked back up at Patton in surprise.

Patton was looking at him with an expression of such genuine compassion and tenderness, it almost made Logan want to start crying in earnest. Then Patton pulled Logan forward and threw his arms around Logan’s shoulders, hugging him tight.

Logan froze for a second in surprise before returning the hug and holding on just as tight. The two opposite Sides held onto each other as if they would never let go of one another.

Then Patton, in a watery, wobbly voice, whispered: “Did you mean it? Everything you said? You…you really love me?”

Logan nodded into Patton’s shoulder, his eyelids fluttering and more tears trickling down his cheeks, and tightened his hold on Patton. “With every figurative fiber of my being,” he breathed.

Patton started weeping silently again, but the tears were no longer of pain and despair; now they were of unbridled joy and relief. He never could have believed or hoped that he would be right, that Logan did love him.

Patton tucked his head into the crook of Logan’s neck, burying himself in Logan’s aura of steadiness and security. Logan pressed his head against the side of Patton’s head. For a moment they stayed nestled in their positions, just basking in their closeness and drinking in the warmth from each other’s bodies.

Then, just like before, Logan lifted up a hand to cradle Patton’s cheek, and angled his head slightly to press a kiss to Patton’s temple this time.

Patton stayed still to let the kiss wash over him, then he turned his own head and pressed a kiss of his own to Logan’s cheek.

They locked eyes with each other then. Logan’s eyes were slightly red and still watery, but there was a loving tenderness in them that Patton now realized was the ‘something’ he saw all those times before when they were together. It was the same look he always gave Logan whenever he would look at him from afar during his pining periods, and he hoped he would continue to see it from now on. Patton’s eyes were redder and waterier, but Logan saw that the light had returned in the emotional figment’s gaze, and it was fluorescing brighter than ever, and he resolved to make sure that it would never go out again going forward.

The two Sides found themselves slowly laying down on Patton’s bed, shifting themselves so that their heads were resting comfortably on Patton’s pillows and they were facing each other. Patton curled up against Logan’s chest, listening to Logan’s steady heartbeat and fingers slightly clutching at Logan’s shirt. He closed his eyes and let out a soft sigh, his spirit finally calm after the storm. Logan rested his head on top of Patton’s and wrapped his arms protectively around him. His right hand started rubbing slow, comforting strokes in an up-and-down motion on Patton’s back, and he closed his own eyes and listened to Patton’s slow breathing.

“I still feel like this is all a dream,” Patton mumbled after a few minutes of sweet, peaceful quiet.

Logan opened his eyes and looked down at Patton. “What makes you say that?”

“Just…” Patton opened his own eyes and stared at Logan’s brain insignia, lightly tracing its outline with a finger. “How we’re in my room cuddling on my bed. Being close with each other. That you…actually like me back.”

Logan’s face softened, and he ceased rubbing Patton’s back to place his hand on top on Patton’s hand playing with his insignia. “I understand if you still have reservations about the validity of this moment, but I hope I can assure you that this is all unequivocally real and genuine. Especially when it comes to my feelings towards you.”

Patton felt a rush of warmth at that, and he shifted his hand so that his fingers were laced with Logan’s and gave a squeeze. Logan squeezed back.

They were both silent for a moment before Patton piped up again: “So…what happens now?”

Logan cocked his head. “In terms of what?”

Patton looked up at Logan, shyly biting his lip. “Like…with you and me, you know –“ He trailed off, unsure of how to broach the topic, instead settling for gesturing with his other hand haphazardly between him and Logan.

Luckily, Logan seemed to understand what he was trying to talk about. “Ah. You mean in regards to our mutual attraction for each other?”

Patton nodded, a soft blush blooming in his cheeks; hearing Logan talk about their respective crushes like that was making it more real, and Patton didn’t know how to handle that.

Logan thought for a moment, putting on what Patton lovingly (but privately) called Logan’s ‘thinking face’, which he always found adorable: furrowed brows, a far-off look in his eyes and scrunching up his mouth ever so slightly as he carefully pondered what to say. “Well…now that it’s been established and recognized that we are both romantically interested in one another, the next logical step – or, at least, what usually tends to happen in these situations from what I’ve read – is for both parties to initiate romantic relations. So long as both of them are in agreement.”

Patton giggled at Logan’s long-winded explanation – yet another thing he loved about him – and fixed the logical Side with a flirtatious side-eye. “Is this your way of asking me to be your boyfriend?” he teased.

Logan’s eyes went wide, flushing deeper than Patton. “I – well – you – what I meant was – I – “

Patton laughed and reached up to press his fingers against Logan’s mouth to stop his rambling. Logan fell silent immediately, blinking at Patton, eyes occasionally flickering between him and the hand on his mouth.

“Take your time,” Patton said softly.

Logan nodded and Patton removed his hand then. Logan nibbled on his lip momentarily before taking a breath.

“Patton,– “ he began, a little stiltedly but pushing through, “– w-would you be amenable to entering a – a romantic relationship with me?”

Patton beamed like the rising sun. “I’ve been wanting to for so long.”

A huge smile spread on Logan’s face then, and he pulled Patton into another tight hug, Patton hugging him back, both feeling happier and lighter than they had in awhile. Patton thought he would actually combust from the warmth in his chest searing through him, and, honestly, he would be fine with that.

But then a thought came to him, and he froze.

“Patton?” Logan commented, feeling his other half stiffen in his arms.

Patton pulled back slightly to look at Logan, a strange look on his face. “What does this mean for Thomas? You and me, you know…”

Logan blinked at him before the implication of that statement hit him, a soft ‘Oh’ slipping out of his mouth. He fell back into his ‘thinking face’, thinking over Patton’s inquiry. Patton waited, a small knot of apprehension twisting in his stomach.

“Huh…I didn’t think about what it would mean for Thomas if two Sides were in a relationship. How interesting…” Logan murmured.

“What do you mean?” asked Patton.

Logan reached up to brush away some of Patton’s waves that had fallen over his forehead. “Well…it’s a known fact that in order for Thomas to function optimally, we Sides need to cooperate both professionally and personally, and oftentimes when Thomas has a dilemma, it takes a while for it to get resolved because we all end up disagreeing about what needs to be done, resulting in strife not only between us but for Thomas as well. With the two of us ‘together’ now, this might actually be an improvement.” At Patton’s puzzled expression, Logan continued: “You and I being in a relationship may be beneficial for Thomas in the long run. Considering how we…used to quarrel quite often before, and caused a fair number of metaphorical headaches for Thomas, as we learn to coexist in a more harmonious manner, we might be able to better help Thomas through future trials in his everyday life.”

Patton thought over Logan’s words. Logan had a point. Being polar opposites, he and Logan would often clash more often than was necessary, which he always felt bad about since he didn’t like how Thomas got affected by their arguments. Now that they were a couple, things could actually improve for Thomas.

Then another thought came into his head, and Patton’s brow furrowed again. “But…it’s not always gonna be perfect,” he said quietly. “I’m sure we’re still gonna disagree sometimes, even if we get better about listening to each other.”

Logan hummed at that. “True…there’s no such thing as a ‘perfect’ relationship, and we’re still fundamentally different from one another so there’s bound to be friction in what we think is best for Thomas, but I believe that, with proper communication and effort, we’ll be able to get through any disagreement we run into with little discord. I’m willing to work on it, if you are.”

Patton looked up at Logan for a moment before giving him a bright-eyed smile. “I am.”

Logan smiled back down at Patton, a rare soft look in his eyes. Then they settled back into cuddling – Logan rubbing Patton’s back and Patton resting against Logan’s chest.

For a while, they allowed themselves to enjoy the tranquility of the present moment: soft and lovely, as the representations of heart and mind finally found harmony.

But then Patton sat up slightly, leaning back so he could fully look into Logan’s face but not relinquishing his hold on the scholarly Side, an uncharacteristically serious expression on his face. Logan was a bit surprised at the change of mood and behaviour in the paternal Side, but he stayed quiet, anticipating that Patton was going to say something.

Patton took a deep breath. “Okay…you had your turn to talk earlier. Now, it’s my turn, and I want you to listen very carefully. Okay, sweetie?”

Logan’s heart skipped a beat at the term of endearment, and he nodded slowly, though he couldn’t help but feel a twinge of apprehension as to what Patton was going to say. He braced himself mentally (and emotionally) as best he could.

For a moment Patton didn’t say anything, only continued to look at Logan, and Logan’s apprehension grew.

But then Patton’s face softened into a look of pure gentleness and kindness that figuratively took Logan’s breath away, and he placed a hand on Logan’s cheek, smiling as Logan leaned into the touch, and he started stroking his cheek with his thumb, echoing the action Logan had done to him earlier.

“You mentioned earlier that you believe yourself to be cold and insensitive, nothing but logic and facts. That all you do is hurt me and thus don’t deserve to be with me. Well, I’m here to tell you that that is complete horse doody. You deserve happiness and love just as much as anyone else, real or otherwise. And you’re more than just ‘Logic’. You’re Logan. Our Logan. My Logan. My Logan who, despite always denying that he ‘doesn’t have emotions’, willingly poured his heart out to me – metaphorically – so he could tell me that he loved me and why. Who was emotionally honest and open about his fears and hopes even though it doesn’t come easy to him. My Logan who genuinely cares about all of us even when he pretends otherwise, and who, during these past few weeks, spent time with me and talked to me and did things for me because he wanted to be better, to do better. And you accomplished it. With as wonderful and kind as you have been, and are, I think it’s safe to say that you’re doing a great job.”

“And, sure, you have your flaws, but so does everyone else. I mean, look at me! I’m not completely unaware; I know I can be a lil’ much at times with the jokes and the puns and always trying to be positive about everything when maybe I need to accept that there’ll be times when I’m sad, or mad, or whatever other bad feelings I feel because it’s all part of being human. And yeah, I know we’re not actually human, but we’re physical representations of a human so we possess certain aspects of being human. And I’ve seen us all try to be the perfect Side for Thomas, the absolute best that we can possibly be at our function and purpose, when – and I know it’s rich coming from me of all Sides – it’s just not possible. If we were completely perfect, or tried to be all the time, it would be boring. We would be boring. Thomas would be boring. The reason he’s the way he is and why his family, friends and fans love him so much is because of us, and how imperfect we are. Imperfections make life more beautiful. And I love everything that makes you you, Logan. I wouldn’t want you to change any part of you for anything in the world. You are enough as you are.”

“And, yeah, it’s true that you’ve hurt me, but I’ve hurt you, too. There are always gonna be times in life when we’ll hurt each other, whether by accident or on purpose because we’re upset with each other; it’s unavoidable. Nothing can be all sunshine and rainbows all the time. I mean, just look at how much Virgil and Roman argue, or how you and Roman clash often. Look what happened between me, Roman and Virgil after the wedding, and even you and Virgil have had your own moments with each other from time to time; it’s part of life. It’s what it means to be a family, or a couple. What’s more important is that, at our very cores, we truly don’t mean to hurt each other because we love and care for each other so much, and so long as we recognize that and are as mindful as possible of our words and actions, then we’ll be able to get through any issue with as little hurt as possible.”

Patton paused for a moment, then he leaned forward and kissed Logan’s left cheek. When he leaned back, he gave his sweetheart a kind, loving smile. “I’m willing to work at it, if you are, too.”

Logan gaped at Patton, mouth slightly open, processing every single word Patton had said during his speech – Patton swore he could actually hear the gears in Logan’s head turning – and letting it all sink in.

Patton waited with bated breath, heart fluttering nervously like a hummingbird in captivity.

Then – in that subtle way that was Logan’s trademark characteristic – Logan’s face creased ever so slightly and a few tears trickled down his face again.

He reached out to pull Patton’s face towards him and pressed a long, fervent kiss to Patton’s right cheek. Then his right arm pulled Patton in close again and his left hand came up to cradle the back of Patton’s head. He pressed his forehead ever so gently against Patton’s and closed his eyes, sniffles coming out in silent, short breaths.

Patton slid his arms around Logan’s torso and pulled them even closer together, hands flat on Logan’s back and rubbing gentle circles into it. He closed his eyes too, cooing soft reassurances to Logan.

As they basked in that loving embrace, Patton heard, in a soft, tremulous breath, the most beautiful words he thought he’d ever hear from Logan:

“I love you.”

And Logan meant every word.

Words were Logan’s strongest suit, just as emotions were with Patton. Being the self-proclaimed ‘primary overseer of Thomas’ language center’ and possessing the highest proficiency of the English lexicon amongst the Sides, Logan had the ability to charm and harm. To educate and elucidate. To heal and break. Logan had always prided himself on saying exactly what he meant and wished to convey. He thought thoughts over before calibrating them into speech, always making sure that they were exactly what he wanted to say. And in this instance, with the Side that he never thought he would ever love so deeply, the most well-known three-word sentence in the English language needed to be treated with the utmost respect and care. It couldn’t be thrown around so flippantly. So, when Logan told Patton that he loved him, he meant it as emphatically as when he was providing exposition during the Sides’ discussions with Thomas on his various dilemmas, and with all the love that he was organically producing within his being.

Patton let the love from Logan’s words sink deep into his core. Then he tilted his head up to kiss Logan’s forehead, and he, in turn, whispered back with all the love in his heart:

“I love you, too.”

They opened their eyes again and took in the sight of each other. The thought that this was the face that was going to love them for as long as it lasted – hopefully forever, they both thought – made both of them feel as if they would never know sadness ever again. Which was an impossible thought and feat, since there needs to be a balance between joy and sorrow, and it was certain that there would be difficult times in the future, but, right now, this was not one of them.

Then Patton broke the moment by touching his nose to Logan’s and going “Boop!” He pulled back with a bubbly giggle.

Logan blinked twice at Patton before huffing out a low chuckle. Though brief, the sound of Logan laughing made Patton’s heart sing and he privately promised to himself to make it happen more often.

Patton stifled a yawn then, suddenly feeling exhausted from the emotional night he’d been having.

Logan, looking towards Patton’s bedside table, noticed the time. “It’s getting pretty late. Perhaps it would be best for us to go to bed,” he suggested quietly.

Patton lifted an eyebrow and quipped in a deadpan tone that Virgil would’ve been proud of: “We’re already in bed.”

Logan let out a louder, more proper laugh at that witty comeback. Patton, beaming that he’d been able to make his promise come true again so soon, wished he could capture Logan’s laugh in a jar so he could listen to it whenever Logan wasn’t going to be around. He also thought that there was a no more beautiful sight than the way Logan’s own face lit up when he laughed. Logan, meanwhile, was reminded of how Patton was clever with words in his own way, and he regretted ever thinking otherwise.

Patton reached up to scratch an itch on his neck, and he paused. It felt like something was missing. He suddenly remembered that his cat hoodie was still somewhere on the floor, and his face fell, feeling a stab of regret for what he did before.

Before he could decide whether to go get it or stay in Logan’s arms, though, Patton suddenly felt something shift over him. He looked down at himself to see that his hoodie had been snapped over his body with his hood flipped over his head. Patton’s khakis had also changed to robin’s egg-blue pajama pants patterned with various types of cats, and his shoes had been snapped away too, leaving his socks. He looked up at Logan who was smiling down at him, as if he’d read Patton’s mind and summoned his hoodie for him. Patton’s look of gratitude and pure adoration was considered thanks enough.

Logan decided to snap himself into his dark grey NASA T-shirt and a pair of deep midnight blue pajama pants patterned with astronomically-accurate depictions of the constellations, and snapped away his own shoes. Patton noticed that Logan was wearing matching midnight blue planet-covered socks – also astronomically-accurate – and smirked in appreciation. Logan, in turn, saw that Patton was wearing mismatched pastel socks: one orange and covered in green houseplants, and the other blue and covered in pink ice cream cones. Far from being turned off by the fact that they weren’t matching, he found it rather endearing.

Both then reluctantly broke the embrace briefly so they could crawl under Patton’s blankets. Once they were tucked in, though, they got right back into the cuddle position. Patton fully wrapped his arms around Logan and rested his head against Logan’s chest again. Logan’s left arm was cradling Patton’s back again, and – using his right hand – he took off his glasses and placed them on the bedside table, before doing the same with Patton’s.

Just before Logan snapped the lights off, Patton suddenly remembered one more thing and lifted his head up. “Oh!” he exclaimed, eyes wide. “The movie night! Roman! Virgil! They – we – I – “ His face creased with guilt and dismay.

Logan shushed him, pushing back Patton’s hood so he could run a calming hand through his lover’s messy waves. “There will be other movie nights,” he soothed. “I’m sure Roman and Virgil will understand.”

“Yeah, but– “

Logan raised his other hand to cup Patton’s cheek and made eye contact with him, Patton falling silent as he did so. “It’ll be alright. Let’s get some rest tonight, and then tomorrow we can talk it over with them about what happened. Okay, love?”

Patton melted under Logan’s touch and the pet name, and slowly nodded his head. “Okay…” he whispered. Logan smiled down at him and kissed his forehead. “Go to sleep now, starlight,” he coaxed.

Pacified, Patton nodded slowly again, and he snuggled into Logan and closed his eyes, allowing exhaustion to take over.

Logan snapped the lights off and pulled Patton closer to him, both arms fully wrapped around him. He pressed a final kiss to the top of Patton’s head before he laid his own head on top of his significant other’s and closed his own eyes, a small smile tracing his lips. Unseen, Patton smiled from the kiss himself.

Before long, both Sides were fast asleep, already dreaming of a bright and hopeful future together, and neither of them stirred when, some time later, Patton’s door opened a crack and two worried Sides peeked in looking for their missing friends, before spotting them in Patton’s bed, intertwined in each other’s arms.

111 notes · View notes