VICTORY

I was raised by scientifically conscientious parents, real big on logic and empiricism and all that jazz, and I really took it to heart. So when I first heard about the birthday candle wishes thing, I did what came naturally. I tried to test it empirically. I invited this kid in my first grade class who was kind of a dick, called me names, tripped me when the teachers weren’t looking, penny-ante schoolyard bully shit. And when they brought the cake out, they told me to close my eyes and make a wish, and I did, and when I opened my eyes the kid hadn’t exploded. Not even a little. At this point I was kind of tempted to write it off, but even then I had an eye towards the replicability crisis, and I knew one failure wasn’t publishable. So next year I invited the same kid, wished again, he didn’t explode that year, either. Or the year after that. Or the year after that. I mean I really sacrificed for this project. My parents had a hard capacity of five guests per party, and every year he took a slot that could have gone to a person who wouldn’t declare open season on the other three guests. And even though I don’t even like pottery, I kept asking to have the parties at the DIY pottery place because that was the only non-suspicious way to have get everyone in smocks and googles when they brought out the cake. But one of the really insidious things I had to deal with was the sense of, I dunno, moral corrosion. Because, you invite a guy you don’t even like to a birthday party six years running with ulterior motives, humoring him, making him think you consistently want him around…  you’re leading the guy on! And moreover I know what it’s like to be on the other side of that, I used to get invited to birthday parties because people wanted to copy my notes. And it’s shitty to wake up one morning and realize you’ve become a bad guy in the same creeping way, and that just must be how that happens. I mean right up until the guy spontaneously combusted at the cake-cutting at my cousin’s birthday party in 2013, I genuinely think he thought we were friends. All to say that this is why research ethics courses are, like, super foundational. Can’t cut corners on that!

Plague Doctor Summer

[Webtoon]

i like this story where rob paulsen talk about meeting these big tough army dudes & as soon as he does pinky’s voice they turn into fangirls 

can we talk about how literally 64% of people wear glasses, and yet we NEVER see them in movies/tv unless it’s on some nerdy or uncool character? why do we adhere to such a weird beauty standard that subconsciously makes us feel bad for,, not being able to see???

cant stop thinking abt ursula k. le guin’s essay abt the carrier bag theory….. she’s like, maybe the first human tool was not a weapon, but rather something that holds, a bag, a pouch, a vessel, something for gathering and storing and sharing. let’s shift the narrative of humanity from that of violence to that of safekeeping. and i’m like

renaissance in the 21st century

Harvey busting Bruce out of GCPD lockup, from the novel Batman: Nightwalker by Marie Lu, comic adaptation by Stuart Moore and Chris Wildgoose.

My favorite form of redemption arc is “I hate that I have morals now”

I’m still trying to wrap my head around the fact that Yakko sleeps canonically in a kiddie pool ball pit decorated with stars now.

See you never!

going back to my roots with more animal crossing gijinkas

Mary Elizabeth Winstead as Helena Bertinelli BIRDS OF PREY (2020) dir. Cathy Yan

gay people going to brunch like

inspired by this:

so, once upon a time, there were a bunch of super-powered babies all born on the same day. seven of these lucky little weirdos got adopted by a genius billionaire developed some daddy issues.

now, let’s try to get over it and save the world.